1
00:00:00,750 --> 00:00:01,750
Hey!

2
00:00:02,770 --> 00:00:04,170
Hey!

3
00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:05,800
Would your sister like more coffee,
Ellen?

4
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:08,360
This is not my sister.

5
00:01:08,580 --> 00:01:10,400
You're kidding. I didn't know you had a
daughter.

6
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,840
Joe, this is my mother. No way.

7
00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:15,800
Shouldn't you be in school, young lady?

8
00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:22,220
Are you seeing anyone these days?

9
00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:23,560
No one special.

10
00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:25,480
Whatever happened to that Chris fellow?

11
00:01:26,060 --> 00:01:27,080
That was three years ago.

12
00:01:27,940 --> 00:01:31,120
I liked him. I know you did. We broke
up.

13
00:01:31,630 --> 00:01:34,250
Oh. He moved to Chicago. Married someone
named Sandy.

14
00:01:35,090 --> 00:01:36,130
Are they getting along?

15
00:01:37,930 --> 00:01:39,770
I think it's time to give up on Chris,
Mom.

16
00:01:40,450 --> 00:01:44,130
I just worry about you. Well, you don't
have to. Well, Ellen, you're not

17
00:01:44,130 --> 00:01:47,650
immortal. You're going to lose your
looks just like everyone else.

18
00:01:48,950 --> 00:01:50,210
Already there are signs.

19
00:01:53,230 --> 00:01:54,230
Signs? What signs?

20
00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:56,510
Your hips are widening.

21
00:01:57,610 --> 00:02:01,010
They are not. Oh, you're coming to that
age. I remember when it started with me.

22
00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:05,850
I exercise every day. Oh, well, so did
I. And I ate like a bird, but they kept

23
00:02:05,850 --> 00:02:06,910
right on widening.

24
00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:09,090
Slow but sure.

25
00:02:10,090 --> 00:02:11,690
Like glaciers. Mom!

26
00:02:13,910 --> 00:02:16,310
I just want you to be happy.

27
00:02:16,710 --> 00:02:19,070
You know, it's possible to be happy
without a man.

28
00:02:19,510 --> 00:02:21,370
Must you joke about everything?

29
00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:26,010
Oh! Oh! Guess who I ran into yesterday?

30
00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:28,140
Wanda Henderson.

31
00:02:28,740 --> 00:02:29,940
Wanda Henderson? From New Orleans?

32
00:02:30,180 --> 00:02:32,460
Uh -huh. What's she doing in L .A.?
Well, she and her husband moved into our

33
00:02:32,460 --> 00:02:36,960
complex. And their son Doug came by. You
remember him? Oh, yeah.

34
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:40,240
Now, why do you say it like that? He was
a very nice boy.

35
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:41,800
Weird Doug?

36
00:02:41,940 --> 00:02:45,380
Mom, you know how in school there's
always that one kid who eats bugs and

37
00:02:45,380 --> 00:02:48,660
to himself and all the other kids try to
avoid? Yes. Okay, well, that kid

38
00:02:48,660 --> 00:02:49,700
thought Doug was a freak.

39
00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:54,920
I gave him your number.

40
00:02:55,180 --> 00:02:56,180
You what?

41
00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:59,100
You had no right. Why would you do this
to me again?

42
00:02:59,460 --> 00:03:02,760
Whenever you fix me up in these blind
days, they never work out. Well, you had

43
00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:04,680
very nice time with that Mitch Verdugo.

44
00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:06,280
He stole from me.

45
00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:08,780
You had no proof.

46
00:03:20,940 --> 00:03:23,040
Hey, Santa brought trash this year.

47
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:25,820
It's not trash. It's recycling.

48
00:03:27,380 --> 00:03:28,420
Smells like trash.

49
00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:32,480
My recycling program is not exactly
going as planned. The neighbors seem to

50
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:34,400
think it means dumping their empties on
our doorstep.

51
00:03:34,700 --> 00:03:37,380
Wow. Somebody sure can't put away the
scotch. Yeah.

52
00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:38,720
That's Jeff and 3B.

53
00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:41,660
How can somebody drink that much and
still hold down a job?

54
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:45,100
That's no big deal. These days, those
big planes pretty much fly themselves.

55
00:03:49,100 --> 00:03:50,100
Oh, my God.

56
00:03:51,359 --> 00:03:53,240
Cosmopolitan Magazine wants to print one
of my pictures.

57
00:03:53,460 --> 00:03:56,500
You're kidding. That's great, Adam. I
entered a contest they held for photos

58
00:03:56,500 --> 00:03:58,200
depicting the women of L .A. Let's see.

59
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:03,240
Our editors consider you one of the
finest up -and -coming female

60
00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:08,500
Uh -oh. You entered a contest for women
photographers?

61
00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:11,480
Well, I thought it was for pictures of
women, not by women.

62
00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:13,200
It's an honest mistake.

63
00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:16,060
Come on. You didn't even print your full
name, A. Green.

64
00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:17,600
Very clever.

65
00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:18,880
It's how I'm known professionally.

66
00:04:19,630 --> 00:04:20,229
By who?

67
00:04:20,230 --> 00:04:21,370
A imaginary friend?

68
00:04:22,730 --> 00:04:24,410
No, it's fine. Make fun.

69
00:04:24,650 --> 00:04:28,930
You know, my first shot at national
exposure dashed. That is amusing.

70
00:04:31,090 --> 00:04:32,810
I'm sorry, Adam. You're just going to
have to withdraw.

71
00:04:33,630 --> 00:04:34,630
Maybe not.

72
00:04:34,950 --> 00:04:36,930
After all, all they know is my first
initial.

73
00:04:37,470 --> 00:04:39,910
I could say my name is Annabelle.

74
00:04:40,270 --> 00:04:43,130
No, you couldn't. Why not? I took a good
picture.

75
00:04:43,430 --> 00:04:47,330
Why should I, once again, be
discriminated against just because I'm a

76
00:04:48,670 --> 00:04:52,190
Because then you would be a lying, self
-serving lowlife. I will not let you do

77
00:04:52,190 --> 00:04:53,710
it. It's a picture of you.

78
00:04:54,190 --> 00:04:55,190
I'm going to be in Cosmo?

79
00:04:56,250 --> 00:04:57,029
Maybe not.

80
00:04:57,030 --> 00:05:00,030
After all, I don't want to be a lying,
self -serving lowlife.

81
00:05:00,270 --> 00:05:02,510
Did I call you that? No, I meant scamp.

82
00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:06,790
Don't get that. That could be Doug. My
mother said he may call today. So I'm

83
00:05:06,790 --> 00:05:08,250
allowed to answer my phone again, ever?

84
00:05:08,470 --> 00:05:09,950
Just let the machine pick it up.

85
00:05:12,890 --> 00:05:13,890
Great.

86
00:05:14,530 --> 00:05:17,530
They hung up. You know, this could be
one of the most important calls of my

87
00:05:17,530 --> 00:05:20,060
life. This could have been a job. It
could have been the president. It could

88
00:05:20,060 --> 00:05:21,060
have been a woman.

89
00:05:21,940 --> 00:05:24,400
Well, okay, but it could have been the
president.

90
00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:28,840
Hey. Hey, Paige.

91
00:05:30,300 --> 00:05:32,320
I see Jeff's still putting away the
scotch, huh?

92
00:05:32,780 --> 00:05:33,940
How does he keep a job?

93
00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:37,080
It's no big deal. These days, those big
planes practically fly themselves.

94
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:39,880
That's my joke.

95
00:05:42,100 --> 00:05:45,460
Oh, Ellen, I'm going to the opening of a
new club tonight, and I want to borrow

96
00:05:45,460 --> 00:05:46,460
your bomber jacket.

97
00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:47,760
No, you would lose it.

98
00:05:48,090 --> 00:05:49,230
Well, that is not true.

99
00:05:49,570 --> 00:05:51,510
Why don't you wear that new suede jacket
you just bought?

100
00:05:52,010 --> 00:05:53,150
It's temporarily missing.

101
00:05:55,030 --> 00:05:56,530
So did Doug call? No.

102
00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:59,370
He's probably still trying to figure out
where he's going to stash my body.

103
00:06:00,910 --> 00:06:03,350
Just because he was a weird kid doesn't
mean he's weird now.

104
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:07,830
Oh, yeah, Paige. I mean, a childhood of
wedgies, arson, and bug eating almost

105
00:06:07,830 --> 00:06:09,690
always leads to a normal adulthood.

106
00:06:11,890 --> 00:06:14,830
Yeah, I don't know why parents think
they're such good matchmakers anyway.

107
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:16,500
They were so good at it.

108
00:06:16,660 --> 00:06:20,140
How come they spent their entire lives
trapped in a loveless marriage,

109
00:06:20,140 --> 00:06:22,740
at each other night after night, and
then trying to blot out the pain with

110
00:06:22,740 --> 00:06:23,740
alcohol?

111
00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,120
Something you want to share with us,
Paige?

112
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:32,600
No.

113
00:06:38,460 --> 00:06:40,180
If you don't answer that, I will.

114
00:06:40,420 --> 00:06:41,920
Maybe it's just an obscene caller.

115
00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:43,800
My luck is nowhere near that good.

116
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:52,880
Hello? Hi, Doug.

117
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:56,400
Yeah, it's me. I had a frog in my
throat.

118
00:06:58,160 --> 00:06:59,160
That's just an expression.

119
00:07:02,340 --> 00:07:03,720
So this is where he's taking you, huh?

120
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:06,200
Swanky. Yeah.

121
00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:08,340
And me without my pearls.

122
00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:10,520
So, you know the drill.

123
00:07:11,060 --> 00:07:13,320
Right, just come back and bail you out.
Just tell me when.

124
00:07:13,790 --> 00:07:17,850
Well, it's 7 o 'clock now, and I should
spend some time with a guy, so let's say

125
00:07:17,850 --> 00:07:18,870
7 .05?

126
00:07:20,110 --> 00:07:21,110
7 .30.

127
00:07:21,130 --> 00:07:22,150
Okay? Right.

128
00:07:22,590 --> 00:07:23,590
Break a leg.

129
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:24,610
Thanks.

130
00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:55,390
I was, uh, the traffic was just, you
know.

131
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:57,310
That's all right.

132
00:08:03,790 --> 00:08:04,790
Nice place.

133
00:08:10,370 --> 00:08:11,370
Look.

134
00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:13,970
What are these?

135
00:08:14,250 --> 00:08:15,270
Pictures of me.

136
00:08:15,850 --> 00:08:16,910
They certainly are.

137
00:08:18,250 --> 00:08:19,250
Ellen?

138
00:08:19,550 --> 00:08:20,930
Doug? Hi.

139
00:08:21,370 --> 00:08:22,370
Hi.

140
00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:24,280
Who's your friend?

141
00:08:24,300 --> 00:08:25,340
Oh, he's not my friend.

142
00:08:25,540 --> 00:08:28,900
I'm just with him. I mean, I'm not with
him. I just met him. I thought it was

143
00:08:28,900 --> 00:08:30,360
you. You thought this was me?

144
00:08:30,660 --> 00:08:31,940
Yeah, I'm sorry. Big mistake.

145
00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:37,100
Clearly not you. So, hey, actually, I
think I'm going to go wash up.

146
00:08:38,659 --> 00:08:45,240
I think that my worst blind date ever
would have to be the Ruski guy.

147
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,220
I have no idea what that means.

148
00:08:47,920 --> 00:08:50,460
Ellen, would you like another glass of
wine or Ruski?

149
00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:53,180
I believe I will have the steak -a
-rooski.

150
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,440
Maybe after dinner we could take a
stroll -a -rooski.

151
00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,580
I wanted to push him in front of a bus
-a -rooski.

152
00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:03,840
Boy, you are so different than that
fifth grader I remember.

153
00:09:04,260 --> 00:09:05,260
People change.

154
00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:06,360
They sure do.

155
00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:09,580
Never thought I'd hear myself say this,
but score one for Mom.

156
00:09:10,220 --> 00:09:12,960
I just remembered the worst blind date
of all. Yeah.

157
00:09:13,900 --> 00:09:18,080
I went out with this woman who actually
arranged to have her friend call the

158
00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:19,300
restaurant in the middle of dinner.

159
00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:21,240
And say her house was on fire.

160
00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:23,500
Isn't that rude?

161
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:27,440
Rude? Yeah.

162
00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:29,440
Rude or rusky?

163
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,280
I can't top that.

164
00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:32,620
In fact, let's leave.

165
00:09:35,420 --> 00:09:37,520
Ellen, thank God I found you.

166
00:09:38,060 --> 00:09:39,060
Oh, God.

167
00:09:39,180 --> 00:09:40,640
Sorry to interrupt. How are you?

168
00:09:41,020 --> 00:09:42,020
You've got to come with me.

169
00:09:42,660 --> 00:09:47,260
Yeah, well, whatever it is, I'm sure it
can wait. No, it can't. This is an

170
00:09:47,260 --> 00:09:49,180
emergency. Adam fell off the roof.

171
00:09:49,690 --> 00:09:52,810
Come on, Ellen, we've got to get to the
hospital. If you need to go... No, no,

172
00:09:52,830 --> 00:09:53,409
wait a minute.

173
00:09:53,410 --> 00:09:56,650
Now, Paige, are you sure that Adam fell
off the roof?

174
00:09:57,010 --> 00:09:58,470
Because maybe he didn't.

175
00:10:00,670 --> 00:10:07,070
And if he didn't fall off the roof, then
maybe I wouldn't have to go to the

176
00:10:07,070 --> 00:10:11,250
hospital with you, and then I could just
stay here and enjoy my date with Doug.

177
00:10:13,910 --> 00:10:14,910
You're right.

178
00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:20,560
didn't fall off the roof.

179
00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:25,920
He fell off the couch onto some pillows.

180
00:10:26,740 --> 00:10:27,920
He's fine. Okay.

181
00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,560
I just thought you should know. Okay.

182
00:10:30,940 --> 00:10:32,380
Bye -bye. Okay, bye.

183
00:10:39,560 --> 00:10:41,700
That's Paige. She is so funny.

184
00:10:42,020 --> 00:10:44,080
Wait till you hear. She, um...

185
00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:49,900
this inside joke, and she's always
trying to get me to go to the hospital.

186
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:55,140
And I try to get her to go to the
airport.

187
00:10:55,520 --> 00:11:00,180
And she's winning right now. She's up
three to one.

188
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:05,780
But this weekend, I am going to get her,
because I've got a plan, and it's good.

189
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:23,860
Remember when I said I was over losing
things?

190
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:25,440
I was wrong.

191
00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:26,800
You lost my jacket.

192
00:11:27,660 --> 00:11:28,720
Yes. Oh, Paige.

193
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:30,020
But it gets worse.

194
00:11:30,260 --> 00:11:35,460
See, your jacket was in the trunk of my
boss's BMW, which I took to be detailed,

195
00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:40,060
and then when I went back to the place
for it, it had been stolen. I lost a

196
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,540
Ellen. I lost a $50 ,000 car.

197
00:11:43,420 --> 00:11:44,780
That may be a personal best.

198
00:11:46,680 --> 00:11:50,500
Did you tell your boss about it? Yeah,
you know, that was the amazing part

199
00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:54,220
it. He didn't care. He seemed downright
pleased with me.

200
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:58,740
Hmm. You know, if you could find a way
to somehow misplace his house, you could

201
00:11:58,740 --> 00:12:00,100
possibly be looking at a promotion.

202
00:12:01,560 --> 00:12:03,740
Hey, what happened last night? You
didn't want the bailout.

203
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:06,800
Couldn't you see? I mean, he wasn't
weird. He was nice, and he was funny,

204
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,720
was sweet, and I had a great time.

205
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:13,160
So he didn't need a single bug all
night, huh? No, he's been off bugs for

206
00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:14,160
years now.

207
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:15,920
You gonna see him again?

208
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:17,100
I certainly am.

209
00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:20,670
I mean, this is the first time in my
life I have been looking forward to a

210
00:12:20,670 --> 00:12:22,130
follow -up call from a blind date.

211
00:12:23,030 --> 00:12:24,050
Incredible. Yeah.

212
00:12:30,190 --> 00:12:31,530
It's only been four days.

213
00:12:31,770 --> 00:12:32,770
He still might call.

214
00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:38,510
No, Paige, it's time to face the facts.
When something is this obvious, you just

215
00:12:38,510 --> 00:12:39,510
have to accept it.

216
00:12:40,610 --> 00:12:42,790
Clearly, Doug has been kidnapped and
cannot get to a phone.

217
00:12:49,070 --> 00:12:51,030
Alan, maybe Doug's just out of town.

218
00:12:51,550 --> 00:12:55,130
No, no. I swung by his place last night.
He looked pretty in town through the

219
00:12:55,130 --> 00:12:56,130
binoculars.

220
00:12:58,630 --> 00:12:59,630
Shame on you.

221
00:12:59,870 --> 00:13:03,450
Look, I'm not taking this well, all
right? Every blind date calls except for

222
00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:04,450
one that you want to call.

223
00:13:05,110 --> 00:13:08,830
Alan, I've been thinking it over. I
really need you to do this. Forget it.

224
00:13:09,150 --> 00:13:12,490
What's the big deal? When Cosmo calls,
all you have to do is pose as me.

225
00:13:13,090 --> 00:13:14,450
Annabelle? Whatever.

226
00:13:14,950 --> 00:13:17,990
Please? No. It's dishonest, and I won't
be a party to it.

227
00:13:18,609 --> 00:13:20,250
Okay, I understand.

228
00:13:20,710 --> 00:13:22,830
You're a woman of principles, and I
respect that.

229
00:13:23,210 --> 00:13:24,210
What about you, Paige?

230
00:13:24,490 --> 00:13:25,490
Okay. Great!

231
00:13:26,530 --> 00:13:30,110
Okay, they're going to call any minute,
so let's practice. Now, why is my work

232
00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,390
so rooted in my womanhood?

233
00:13:31,830 --> 00:13:33,550
Because you're a woman? No.

234
00:13:34,010 --> 00:13:38,790
No, it's because I meditate on my
feelings and moods until, in a rush of

235
00:13:38,790 --> 00:13:43,770
inspiration, an image comes to me from
my womb. Then, through photography, I

236
00:13:43,770 --> 00:13:46,990
give birth to it, clutch it to my bosom,
and suckle it.

237
00:13:49,199 --> 00:13:50,199
Say that.

238
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,000
Without laughing?

239
00:13:55,220 --> 00:13:57,260
So, what's the deal? Did you talk to
Mrs. Anderson?

240
00:13:57,500 --> 00:13:58,500
Yes, I certainly did.

241
00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:02,260
Well, what's wrong? I mean, why didn't
Doug call me back? I thought we had a

242
00:14:02,260 --> 00:14:02,839
nice time.

243
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:03,840
Well, that's not what I heard.

244
00:14:04,780 --> 00:14:08,400
Doug told his mother that you seemed,
uh, weird.

245
00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:15,420
Weird? Yeah, yeah, that he found you
sitting with some vagrant buying

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00:14:15,420 --> 00:14:17,120
pornographic pictures.

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00:14:17,980 --> 00:14:21,550
What? I wasn't buying pornographic
pictures. I was just looking at them.

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00:14:22,350 --> 00:14:27,950
And then apparently some crazy friend of
yours came in and started blabbering

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about falling off the roof.

250
00:14:29,670 --> 00:14:33,610
Oh, man, this is ridiculous. I have to
straighten this whole thing out with

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00:14:33,610 --> 00:14:34,670
Doug. Oh, I hope so.

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00:14:35,130 --> 00:14:38,890
Because I think you should know that
Wanda Henderson spoke to some of the

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00:14:38,890 --> 00:14:44,450
at the complex and now they're all
calling you Weird Ellen.

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00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:50,280
Do we have to eat here again?

255
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:53,040
We do if I ever want to see Doug again.
He comes here a lot.

256
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:54,900
Why, does he have a cholesterol
deficiency?

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00:14:57,040 --> 00:14:58,300
Says the place has character.

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00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:02,880
Listen, if Doug does come here, what are
you going to say? He thinks you're

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00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:06,140
weird. That's exactly the point. I have
been wrongly accused of weirdness. I've

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00:15:06,140 --> 00:15:07,140
got to clear my name.

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00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:08,980
I'm like the weird fugitive.

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00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:14,420
Oh, speaking of weird, turns out my boss
arranged to have his car stolen because

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00:15:14,420 --> 00:15:15,420
he couldn't get out of his lease.

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00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:17,750
You're kidding. He used you to commit
fraud?

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00:15:17,970 --> 00:15:20,930
I could be implicated in this whole
thing. I need your advice.

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00:15:21,610 --> 00:15:22,610
All right.

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00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:25,950
When you get to prison, don't just join
the first gang.

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00:15:27,030 --> 00:15:30,990
You want to be choosy. Oh, God, here he
is. Doug? Yes, go. Shoes. Scat, we'll

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00:15:30,990 --> 00:15:31,990
talk at home. All right, go.

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00:15:32,610 --> 00:15:33,610
Doug!

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00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:39,390
What a complete and total coincidence.

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00:15:39,750 --> 00:15:40,750
What are you doing here?

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00:15:41,110 --> 00:15:44,850
Oh, I was just in the neighborhood, so I
stopped in for a quick greasy bite. You

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00:15:44,850 --> 00:15:45,749
want to sit down?

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00:15:45,750 --> 00:15:47,110
Actually, I'm with some friends.

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00:15:47,970 --> 00:15:51,050
Okay, well, it was good seeing you.
Yeah, you too.

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00:15:51,410 --> 00:15:54,670
Wait, Doug, can I ask you a question?
It's kind of a weird question, but the

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00:15:54,670 --> 00:15:56,550
other night, did you think I was weird?

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00:15:56,830 --> 00:16:00,230
No. Oh, come on. You can be honest with
me. I mean, we're grown -ups.

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00:16:00,630 --> 00:16:02,750
Your mom told my mom that you said that
I was weird.

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00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:11,850
Well, there was that thing with the guy
with the pictures, and then your friend

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00:16:11,850 --> 00:16:14,070
who fell off the roof or the couch or...

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00:16:14,510 --> 00:16:17,170
Whatever. You have to admit, it did
start to get a little strange.

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00:16:17,550 --> 00:16:20,610
Oh, yeah. I had my friend Paige come
here to bail me out. But, I mean, a

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00:16:20,610 --> 00:16:23,650
woman goes on a blind date at a downtown
diner. She's got to take precautions.

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00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:26,650
If I would have known how nice you were,
I wouldn't have bothered.

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00:16:26,850 --> 00:16:28,550
But, I mean, I ask you, does that sound
weird?

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00:16:29,810 --> 00:16:30,810
I guess not.

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00:16:30,970 --> 00:16:34,690
And then to further convince you how
very, very not weird I am, how about

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00:16:34,690 --> 00:16:35,589
another date?

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00:16:35,590 --> 00:16:37,850
Yeah, I'd like that. Okay. How's dinner
tomorrow?

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00:16:38,230 --> 00:16:39,230
That's great.

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00:16:47,530 --> 00:16:50,430
Is that what you're wearing on your
date? Yeah. Yeah, Doug's taking me to

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00:16:50,430 --> 00:16:52,110
new landfill that opened up downtown.

295
00:16:52,950 --> 00:16:54,470
He won't be here for an hour. You want a
beer?

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00:16:54,730 --> 00:16:55,730
No, thanks.

297
00:16:56,110 --> 00:16:56,869
Great news.

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00:16:56,870 --> 00:17:01,410
The police found my boss's BMW, and I am
driving it to the insurance adjuster

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00:17:01,410 --> 00:17:02,309
right now.

300
00:17:02,310 --> 00:17:03,310
Oh, yeah.

301
00:17:05,690 --> 00:17:09,710
No, the great news is that your jacket
was still in it when they found it. Oh,

302
00:17:09,810 --> 00:17:10,910
that is great. Where is it?

303
00:17:11,150 --> 00:17:12,150
Now? Yeah.

304
00:17:13,869 --> 00:17:16,990
Well, officially, I think it's still
considered evidence.

305
00:17:18,210 --> 00:17:19,210
Evidence?

306
00:17:19,450 --> 00:17:23,950
Yeah, you know, they found something in
one of the pockets with your name on it,

307
00:17:23,990 --> 00:17:25,349
and the police want to talk to you.

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00:17:26,490 --> 00:17:27,690
So I'm a suspect?

309
00:17:27,950 --> 00:17:30,230
No, no, no, no.

310
00:17:31,310 --> 00:17:32,310
Yes.

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00:17:33,590 --> 00:17:37,890
Paige? Ellen, it's nothing. Come on, all
you have to do is you have to tell the

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00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:41,530
truth because you lent me the jacket,
and there's nothing linking you to the

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00:17:41,530 --> 00:17:42,530
at all.

314
00:17:42,730 --> 00:17:44,890
All right, as long as I only have to
tell the truth.

315
00:17:45,770 --> 00:17:49,070
All right. Is Adam still here? I was
supposed to meet him an hour ago. Poses

316
00:17:49,070 --> 00:17:52,650
this Annabelle creature again, this time
in person. I haven't seen him.

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00:17:52,910 --> 00:17:56,630
But I have to jump in the shower because
Doug's taking me tonight to patina.

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00:17:57,130 --> 00:17:58,270
Ooh, fancy.

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00:17:58,770 --> 00:18:02,090
Well, I recommend the Chateauneuf -du
-Pape. Oh.

320
00:18:02,350 --> 00:18:03,350
Gesundheit.

321
00:18:08,210 --> 00:18:09,210
Paige, your keys.

322
00:18:10,210 --> 00:18:11,830
Paige. Hey, Doug.

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00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:15,100
Ellen. You're early. I'm sorry. I should
have called. But I got tickets to the

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00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:16,960
Laker game. If we hurry, we can just
make it.

325
00:18:17,300 --> 00:18:19,400
Sure. I love football. Come on in. I'm
not drunk.

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00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:20,880
Sorry.

327
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:22,700
Those are my bottles.

328
00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:25,500
Not my bottles. They're... I don't
drink.

329
00:18:26,260 --> 00:18:27,260
Much.

330
00:18:29,180 --> 00:18:31,180
These are... People give them to me.

331
00:18:31,660 --> 00:18:34,100
Not as a gift or anything. Here.

332
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:35,400
Thanks. You know.

333
00:18:35,980 --> 00:18:39,680
It's recycling. I'm nutty for recycling.
Not nutty. Normal for recycling.

334
00:18:49,850 --> 00:18:52,810
Adam? Don't start with me, Ellen. I'm in
a mood.

335
00:18:54,870 --> 00:18:56,430
Do I look like a woman to you?

336
00:18:57,870 --> 00:19:01,590
Sure. I think so, too. But not
Cosmopolitan Magazine.

337
00:19:02,190 --> 00:19:04,450
No, they think I'm some kind of sexist
freak.

338
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:08,370
Doug, this is my roommate Adam. Adam,
Doug.

339
00:19:09,090 --> 00:19:09,889
How's it going?

340
00:19:09,890 --> 00:19:10,890
Good.

341
00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:19,200
You know, maybe tonight's a bad night.
Why don't you and your pal there take

342
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,440
these kids? No, no, no, no. I know how
strange all this must look, but it

343
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:25,600
can all be explained, and it's really an
amusing story.

344
00:19:26,420 --> 00:19:27,420
Please open up.

345
00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:31,900
Wait till you hear this one. Excuse me.

346
00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:37,760
Hello, officers. Can I help you with
something? Are you Ellen Morgan? Yes, I

347
00:19:37,860 --> 00:19:40,220
We'd like to question you in connection
to a stolen BMW.

348
00:19:41,050 --> 00:19:45,010
A stolen BMW? Well, I'm sure I know
nothing about that. Just the same. Can

349
00:19:45,010 --> 00:19:46,010
come in?

350
00:19:46,230 --> 00:19:48,690
Whatever. Look, Doug, this may take a
few minutes.

351
00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:52,210
Ma 'am, what do you know about these BMW
keys?

352
00:19:52,970 --> 00:19:54,890
I'm afraid we're going to have to bring
you in for questioning.

353
00:19:55,130 --> 00:19:56,130
Excuse me, Alan.

354
00:19:56,630 --> 00:19:57,690
Where do you keep your cold cream?

355
00:19:58,870 --> 00:19:59,870
I'm out of here.

356
00:20:00,450 --> 00:20:01,309
Wait, wait.

357
00:20:01,310 --> 00:20:04,090
They'll just grill me for a few hours
and we can still make the second half. I

358
00:20:04,090 --> 00:20:06,050
am never letting my mom set me up again.

359
00:20:06,250 --> 00:20:08,550
Wait, Doug, this can all be explained.
Please come back.

360
00:20:09,270 --> 00:20:10,270
I'm not weird.

361
00:20:10,990 --> 00:20:11,990
I'm not weird.

362
00:20:13,550 --> 00:20:15,090
Tell your mom I'm not weird.

363
00:20:18,270 --> 00:20:19,270
Call me.

364
00:20:25,890 --> 00:20:31,970
So then, when I got finished at the
police station, I had to go back to the

365
00:20:31,970 --> 00:20:33,870
coffee shop and explain everything
again.

366
00:20:34,110 --> 00:20:37,750
It'd be kind of a bumpy road getting
here, but now that we're together, it's

367
00:20:37,750 --> 00:20:38,750
been worth it.

368
00:20:38,900 --> 00:20:41,980
That's the thing about Doug. He's just
so generous and forgiving. It seems like

369
00:20:41,980 --> 00:20:43,300
no matter what I do, he understands.

370
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:47,300
But you know what? Doug's a talented
architect, too. Come on, Ellen. Your mom

371
00:20:47,300 --> 00:20:49,960
doesn't want to hear about that. Yes,
she does. She wants to hear everything.

372
00:20:50,420 --> 00:20:53,880
All right. Let me run to the bathroom.
We'll finish this over lunch. My treat.