1 00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:17,304 Hi, there 2 00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:19,682 Hey 3 00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:25,479 You've got a fair amount of blood on you there, sir. 4 00:02:26,856 --> 00:02:28,357 Oh Huh 5 00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:32,444 Yeah, it's not even mine It was just this 6 00:02:34,864 --> 00:02:36,574 Never mind. 7 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:40,119 Hey, listen, I need you to take this thing off my hands, 8 00:02:40,202 --> 00:02:42,002 just make it someone else's problem, you know? 9 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:45,374 I mean, I thought my boys were gonna love it, but, uh. 10 00:02:45,457 --> 00:02:47,835 Let me tell you, man, they will not. 11 00:02:50,713 --> 00:02:53,090 No, it's not, uh a toy, 12 00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:56,135 so just don't ever call it that. 13 00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:57,511 It's a, uh. 14 00:02:58,512 --> 00:02:59,680 It's. 15 00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,809 Actually, I don't know exactly what it is. 16 00:03:05,352 --> 00:03:07,605 Besides, it appears to be broken. 17 00:03:08,439 --> 00:03:11,483 See, the drumstick seems to be stuck in the up position. 18 00:03:11,567 --> 00:03:15,821 You do not want the goddamn drumstick to come down. 19 00:03:16,906 --> 00:03:17,990 Okay? 20 00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:19,700 Because when it does, 21 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:25,664 I promise you, we are all fucked to hell. 22 00:03:25,748 --> 00:03:26,874 Okay? 23 00:03:30,169 --> 00:03:31,712 Woah Oh. 24 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:33,672 Okay 25 00:03:58,030 --> 00:04:00,407 Well, sir, can't speak for you, 26 00:04:00,491 --> 00:04:04,036 but, heh, I don't feel especially fucked to hell 27 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:31,939 Hot dog 28 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:39,321 Who's smiling now, you infernal son of a whore? 29 00:04:52,668 --> 00:04:54,020 I don't know if every father 30 00:04:54,044 --> 00:04:56,672 passes some secret horror onto his kids. 31 00:04:57,840 --> 00:04:59,425 But mine sure did 32 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:19,320 My name is Hal Shelborn. 33 00:05:19,403 --> 00:05:21,822 This is me and my twin brother, Bill. 34 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:25,326 Well, this is us before everything. 35 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:28,829 Bill was the kind of kid who would say, "Shake on it," 36 00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:31,540 but then pull his hand back and pretend to slick his hair. 37 00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:34,585 He was older than me by three minutes 38 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,795 and ate most of my mum's placenta. 39 00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:39,048 So that made him my "big" brother. 40 00:05:39,131 --> 00:05:40,716 A role he took seriously. 41 00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:43,344 And he treated me like shit whenever he got the chance 42 00:05:43,427 --> 00:05:45,220 I've been meaning to tell you. 43 00:05:46,347 --> 00:05:48,307 Mum says she hates you because you made dad leave, 44 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:49,808 and now she has to go on dates. 45 00:05:51,268 --> 00:05:53,228 But I managed to love him anyway, 46 00:05:53,312 --> 00:05:55,230 even if I did sometimes fantasise 47 00:05:55,314 --> 00:05:57,024 about being an only child 48 00:05:57,107 --> 00:05:59,693 I hate you, Bill Shelborn 49 00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:08,535 My mum raised us on her own 50 00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:10,662 for as long as she could, at least. 51 00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:12,247 And my mum, 52 00:06:12,331 --> 00:06:13,957 well, I can remember her perfectly, 53 00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,542 like it was yesterday. 54 00:06:15,626 --> 00:06:17,086 Your father. 55 00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:22,007 Well, your father went out for a pack of cigarettes 56 00:06:22,091 --> 00:06:23,759 and never came back. 57 00:06:25,511 --> 00:06:28,305 Just made like an egg and 58 00:06:29,181 --> 00:06:30,182 scrambled. 59 00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:32,267 And sure, sure, 60 00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:34,728 I could have been one of his stewardesses, but, 61 00:06:34,812 --> 00:06:36,939 of course, the deadbeat never took me anywhere. 62 00:06:38,023 --> 00:06:39,233 He just brought back 63 00:06:40,109 --> 00:06:42,903 Swiss cuckoo clocks and bonsai trees. 64 00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,239 Knick-knacks and souvenirs 65 00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:46,865 to stuff our closet full. 66 00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:51,703 And one day, my darling boys, 67 00:06:51,787 --> 00:06:53,539 all that horse shit will be yours. 68 00:06:56,333 --> 00:06:58,627 We knew my mum thought it was a bunch of junk. 69 00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:00,546 But for Bill and me, 70 00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:03,757 Dad's closet was full of clues to who he was. 71 00:07:04,383 --> 00:07:05,384 There she is. 72 00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:09,012 Old deadbeat's disguise 73 00:07:26,864 --> 00:07:28,532 The hell's that thing from? 74 00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:30,075 Paris, France or something? 75 00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:33,412 It says, "Organ Grinder Monkey". 76 00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:36,373 "Like Life." 77 00:07:37,458 --> 00:07:39,334 You mean "lifelike," dumb shit. 78 00:07:40,461 --> 00:07:41,462 No. 79 00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:48,385 What? 80 00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:00,468 Give me that thing. 81 00:08:02,065 --> 00:08:03,066 Here 82 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:20,292 You think this does junk if I turn this? 83 00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,711 Don't, Bill It's Dad's. 84 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:25,339 Dad's gone, fuck face. 85 00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:27,090 And I'm his next of "skin," 86 00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:30,010 so legally, everything in here's mine 87 00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,262 Stupid thing's broken anyway. 88 00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:22,646 Don't come in our room, dumb shit. 89 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,986 Shotgun, obviously 90 00:09:29,570 --> 00:09:31,130 Christ, what's worse than a blind date? 91 00:09:31,154 --> 00:09:32,406 I'd rather take my chances 92 00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:34,408 and kiss a goddamn frog and see what happens. 93 00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:35,951 Okay, boys! 94 00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:38,161 Uh, no soda after you brush your teeth, 95 00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:39,788 and no fires, 96 00:09:39,871 --> 00:09:41,915 and no video games because of the last fire. 97 00:09:41,999 --> 00:09:43,434 I tried to tell them no fires, 98 00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:45,018 but these boys are nothing but willish. 99 00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,962 Thank you, babysitter Annie 100 00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:49,089 I'll be home by midnight 101 00:09:54,052 --> 00:09:56,430 Okay, boys, 102 00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:57,907 I've got only one rule for tonight. 103 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,771 Keep your hands off the hot parts of the table. 104 00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:00,934 Okay? 105 00:10:01,018 --> 00:10:02,477 I'll try, but. 106 00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:04,271 I'm just a man. 107 00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:07,107 Bill, knock it off 108 00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:01,805 Holy sh... 109 00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:04,450 Maybe an experience like that 110 00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:05,994 could have brought me and Bill closer. 111 00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:08,854 But it turned out one freak tragedy 112 00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,257 wasn't going to be nearly enough. 113 00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:12,566 Fuck. 114 00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:15,652 How is her head still together? 115 00:12:15,736 --> 00:12:16,820 Sh Sh Sh. 116 00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:19,531 Don't think about it too much 117 00:12:20,574 --> 00:12:21,867 Oh, fuck. 118 00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:24,619 Uuuuhhh. 119 00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:25,746 Oh, yeah. 120 00:12:25,829 --> 00:12:28,540 Today, we are here with Annie Wilkes. 121 00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:32,294 Gone by accident 122 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:35,297 rather, in an accident 123 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:38,175 because, you know, there's no accidents. 124 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:42,137 Um Is there a divine plan? 125 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:44,639 Sure, you know, uh, maybe. 126 00:12:45,307 --> 00:12:47,768 Call it a coin toss, you know, heads or tails, heh. 127 00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:51,188 But not Annie's head 128 00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:55,317 because that is, 129 00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,152 uh, separate. 130 00:12:57,819 --> 00:12:59,571 That's a separate issue Uh. 131 00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:05,619 Uh You know, why her, though, right? 132 00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:07,078 Why Annie? 133 00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:09,581 Why not you? 134 00:13:11,082 --> 00:13:12,167 Or you? 135 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:18,298 Everything for a reason, yeah, totally. 136 00:13:18,381 --> 00:13:20,634 And it is what it is. 137 00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:25,013 Uuuhhh. 138 00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:27,098 It is what it is. 139 00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:28,433 The word of the Lord 140 00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:30,060 Amen. 141 00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:33,939 Everything is an accident. 142 00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:36,191 Or nothing is an accident. 143 00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:38,610 Either way, same thing. 144 00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:43,532 It's not if or even how. 145 00:13:44,658 --> 00:13:45,992 It's only when. 146 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:49,663 Everybody dies. 147 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:53,291 And that's life. 148 00:13:55,710 --> 00:13:57,379 I'll die. 149 00:13:57,462 --> 00:14:00,924 And you will both die. 150 00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:04,594 And all of your friends and their parents 151 00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:07,597 and all of their pets and everybody. 152 00:14:09,140 --> 00:14:11,393 Some of us peacefully in our sleep. 153 00:14:12,853 --> 00:14:15,981 And some of us horribly 154 00:14:16,648 --> 00:14:19,526 violently, tied up with a clothesline, 155 00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:22,654 and screaming through duct tape over our mouths 156 00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:24,614 and all that jazz 157 00:14:26,491 --> 00:14:27,909 And to hell with it. 158 00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:30,453 Come on, let's go dancing. 159 00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:01,067 It might have been on the day of a funeral, 160 00:15:01,151 --> 00:15:03,945 but that probably was the happiest day of my life. 161 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,532 It's funny how quickly that can change 162 00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:16,416 Hey, kid. 163 00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:19,169 Your brother says your dad left your mum. 164 00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:21,630 Lit out to Paris, France to buy cigarettes 165 00:15:21,713 --> 00:15:23,753 'cause you're a big fat baby who cried all the time. 166 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:27,427 And man, don't your mum deserve better? 167 00:15:27,510 --> 00:15:29,095 I mean, don't she? 168 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:32,223 Um - I guess that means 169 00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:34,588 your mum would be wearing the pants in the house now, huh? 170 00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,729 I think that's how it works, yeah. 171 00:15:38,563 --> 00:15:39,898 Aw, but 172 00:15:39,981 --> 00:15:42,567 see, you're wearing pants. 173 00:15:42,651 --> 00:15:45,779 And two people can't be wearing 174 00:15:45,862 --> 00:15:48,073 the pants in the house at the same time. 175 00:15:49,324 --> 00:15:52,869 So, looks like you got yourself a bit of a pants problem, kid 176 00:15:58,375 --> 00:16:00,335 Honey, I'm making PBandJ. 177 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,799 Oh, and how am I? 178 00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:09,511 Oh, I'm great! I love slaving over my two sons all day long 179 00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:23,566 Mum! 180 00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:24,776 Yeah? 181 00:16:25,694 --> 00:16:28,446 Why'd you put Dad's weird monkey in our room? 182 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,824 You know I don't go in there anymore 183 00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:32,450 since I found that stiff sock. 184 00:16:34,703 --> 00:16:35,787 Oh, yeah 185 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,239 You didn't have anything to do 186 00:17:11,322 --> 00:17:13,199 with my babysitter's head, right? 187 00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:16,244 - That'd be like... - Yo! 188 00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:19,735 You really got the hots for that thing, huh? 189 00:17:20,457 --> 00:17:22,333 I... I don't - It's all good. 190 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:24,461 You can have it, but 191 00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:26,296 all you gotta do is say you wanna marry it. 192 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,547 But I don't wanna marry it. 193 00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:29,382 Say, "I wanna be Mrs Stupid Monkey" 194 00:17:29,466 --> 00:17:31,885 I wanna be Mrs Stupid Monkey. 195 00:17:33,678 --> 00:17:34,804 Now say. 196 00:17:35,764 --> 00:17:37,599 "I wanna suck its banana." 197 00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:40,060 No, Bill, no - Say it! 198 00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:42,270 Or I'll eat the rest of your placenta, bitch. 199 00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:46,024 I wanna suck its banana. 200 00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,778 All right We have a deal. 201 00:17:49,861 --> 00:17:51,071 You can have the monkey 202 00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,867 Idiot 203 00:18:01,664 --> 00:18:04,375 Between the ages of 12 and 15, 204 00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:06,711 the penis takes on a life of its own 205 00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:08,213 and becomes sensitive 206 00:18:08,296 --> 00:18:11,382 to physical and emotional horseplay. 207 00:18:12,383 --> 00:18:14,219 Around this time, 208 00:18:14,302 --> 00:18:17,472 the opposite sex becomes both appealing and horrifying 209 00:18:24,687 --> 00:18:26,272 Yo, Mrs Torrance! 210 00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:28,525 Hal Shelborn's jerking his monkey under his desk! 211 00:18:56,719 --> 00:18:58,471 Honey, I'm making devil's food 212 00:18:58,555 --> 00:19:00,181 I don't fucking want any! 213 00:19:00,932 --> 00:19:02,058 Language! 214 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,479 What are you, a sailor in a shipyard? 215 00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:11,359 You 216 00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:17,657 It's because of you that deadbeat Bill this to me 217 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,870 You know who I'm talking about, don't you? 218 00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:25,290 That arsehole kid who lives in here with me 219 00:19:26,291 --> 00:19:27,292 that's Bill. 220 00:19:29,043 --> 00:19:30,378 You wanna know something else? 221 00:19:32,630 --> 00:19:34,132 I wish Bill was dead 222 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:55,987 Hey, Mum, you home? 223 00:19:58,615 --> 00:19:59,824 Is dinner ready? 224 00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:03,453 Mum? 225 00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:22,639 Mum? 226 00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:26,351 You're not even making it yet? 227 00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:53,294 What the fuck?! 228 00:20:58,299 --> 00:20:59,300 Oh, shit 229 00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:10,478 The doctors called what happened to my mum 230 00:21:10,561 --> 00:21:12,313 a boomerang aneurysm. 231 00:21:13,064 --> 00:21:15,650 But I was the only one who knew what it really was. 232 00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:19,612 They said chances of it happening 233 00:21:19,696 --> 00:21:21,281 were one in 44 million. 234 00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:25,201 And that's just another way to say 235 00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:26,703 it has to happen to somebody. 236 00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:29,998 And that's how it works. 237 00:21:30,581 --> 00:21:33,001 You turn the key and the drumsticks go up. 238 00:21:33,918 --> 00:21:35,420 They come down again when it chooses 239 00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:36,796 who it wants to kill next. 240 00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:40,508 It kills who it wants when it feels like it. 241 00:21:41,050 --> 00:21:43,177 And it doesn't owe you an explanation. 242 00:21:45,346 --> 00:21:46,973 It doesn't take requests. 243 00:21:48,224 --> 00:21:49,934 It's true what it says on the box. 244 00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:52,729 It's just like life 245 00:21:55,982 --> 00:21:57,483 Uh son, 246 00:21:57,567 --> 00:21:59,127 - perhaps it's best if you... - Shut up! 247 00:22:05,366 --> 00:22:06,367 Hey, Mum! 248 00:22:08,911 --> 00:22:09,912 Mum, wake up! 249 00:22:13,833 --> 00:22:14,834 Mum? 250 00:22:17,211 --> 00:22:19,297 Mum, that's a funny joke! 251 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:29,724 Wake up 252 00:22:43,905 --> 00:22:45,490 Okay, you can keep talking. 253 00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:53,915 Oh. 254 00:23:03,007 --> 00:23:06,302 You know, your Aunt Ida and your Uncle Chip 255 00:23:07,929 --> 00:23:09,013 never wanted kids. 256 00:23:11,391 --> 00:23:12,392 Nah. 257 00:23:13,601 --> 00:23:16,145 Always just kind of preferred a life where you sit down 258 00:23:16,229 --> 00:23:18,606 and you don't stand up again until you want to. 259 00:23:20,066 --> 00:23:21,692 Also, we're swingers, but. 260 00:23:22,860 --> 00:23:23,861 Oh, well 261 00:23:36,165 --> 00:23:37,542 And I want you to know 262 00:23:38,918 --> 00:23:40,920 we're gonna do our very best with you boys. 263 00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:45,258 It's just that our very best might be 264 00:23:46,467 --> 00:23:47,468 pretty bad 265 00:24:16,539 --> 00:24:18,374 Oh oh, fuck 266 00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:23,629 Fuck! 267 00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:35,808 What the fuck? 268 00:24:49,530 --> 00:24:50,531 Fuck 269 00:25:08,257 --> 00:25:10,009 I put the pieces in a garbage bag 270 00:25:10,092 --> 00:25:11,844 and made sure it got on a garbage truck. 271 00:25:11,928 --> 00:25:14,096 And I assumed that would be the end of it 272 00:25:16,015 --> 00:25:17,350 But after that, 273 00:25:17,433 --> 00:25:19,060 Bill and I were never the same. 274 00:25:20,061 --> 00:25:22,230 I mean, we looked the same because we were twins, 275 00:25:22,313 --> 00:25:24,649 and, well, you know what I mean. 276 00:25:27,443 --> 00:25:29,612 Aunt Ida and Uncle Chip picked up Bill and me 277 00:25:29,695 --> 00:25:31,155 and moved us to Maine. 278 00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:34,408 And I guess I hoped we'd left the worst of it behind us 279 00:26:06,566 --> 00:26:08,276 You going to take off your suit, Bill? 280 00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:12,488 If I take it off, then I'll have to put it back on 281 00:26:12,572 --> 00:26:14,407 as soon as there's another funeral. 282 00:26:15,616 --> 00:26:17,118 But if I don't take it off, 283 00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:19,161 then I won't have to put it back on. 284 00:26:19,787 --> 00:26:22,164 So there won't be any more funerals 285 00:26:30,590 --> 00:26:31,924 Sleep tight, you two 286 00:27:00,036 --> 00:27:01,579 Here comes trouble, here it comes! 287 00:28:12,650 --> 00:28:13,919 Why the hell did you bring it? 288 00:28:13,943 --> 00:28:15,277 I didn't I chopped it up. 289 00:28:15,361 --> 00:28:16,862 Don't look chopped up to me. 290 00:28:17,571 --> 00:28:18,656 I'm telling you, Bill, 291 00:28:19,448 --> 00:28:20,783 it's a bad monkey. 292 00:28:20,866 --> 00:28:24,578 It's a bad, magic, killer monkey. 293 00:28:25,788 --> 00:28:27,456 You think it killed Babysitter Annie? 294 00:28:28,666 --> 00:28:31,502 Maybe Probably I... I don't know. 295 00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:36,006 I was going to marry that girl. 296 00:28:37,091 --> 00:28:38,384 I know you were, Bill. 297 00:28:40,302 --> 00:28:42,781 We should try it on purpose to see if anyone else we know dies. 298 00:28:42,805 --> 00:28:45,349 No, we shouldn't I mean, what if it gets one of us? 299 00:28:45,433 --> 00:28:48,185 Then I promise to pretend to be sad when you're dead. 300 00:28:50,354 --> 00:28:52,481 Yeah, me too. 301 00:28:55,192 --> 00:28:57,653 You think it could kill the person who turns the key or not? 302 00:28:57,737 --> 00:28:59,363 How the hell should I know? 303 00:29:05,661 --> 00:29:07,037 Do you think Mum turned it? 304 00:29:14,003 --> 00:29:15,087 I'm gonna try it. 305 00:29:17,214 --> 00:29:18,215 Don't, Bill... 306 00:29:20,009 --> 00:29:23,471 It was a hunting accident, but not the usual kind. 307 00:29:24,638 --> 00:29:28,350 Uncle Chip was trampled by a stampede of 67 wild horses 308 00:29:28,434 --> 00:29:30,311 in his sleeping bag on a camping trip 309 00:29:31,604 --> 00:29:33,063 I overheard the undertaker say that, 310 00:29:33,147 --> 00:29:34,982 when they dumped the body out, 311 00:29:35,065 --> 00:29:37,568 it looked like someone had drop-kicked a cherry pie. 312 00:29:39,987 --> 00:29:42,198 I don't mind much that Uncle Chip's gone. 313 00:29:42,823 --> 00:29:44,158 He was kind of an arsehole. 314 00:29:44,867 --> 00:29:47,828 I just mind more that I feel pretty good it wasn't me. 315 00:29:48,704 --> 00:29:50,456 But it's got to be done, you know? 316 00:29:51,081 --> 00:29:52,583 To keep it away from the people 317 00:29:52,666 --> 00:29:54,376 who might feel really good about using it, 318 00:29:55,127 --> 00:29:57,463 like the Nazis and Russians 319 00:29:57,546 --> 00:29:59,381 and "Iran-qis" and whatnot. 320 00:30:00,216 --> 00:30:02,134 We knew that it couldn't be destroyed, 321 00:30:02,218 --> 00:30:04,804 so we hoped that we could maybe contain it. 322 00:30:05,429 --> 00:30:06,764 Just get rid of it 323 00:30:09,225 --> 00:30:11,101 Make it go the fuck away 324 00:30:16,065 --> 00:30:17,983 And for a long time, anyway, 325 00:30:19,693 --> 00:30:21,445 it really seemed like it had. 326 00:32:57,810 --> 00:32:58,811 Ah! 327 00:33:59,872 --> 00:34:02,458 I haven't seen the monkey since we threw it down the well, 328 00:34:03,042 --> 00:34:06,295 but it feels like only a matter of time before it comes back. 329 00:34:09,089 --> 00:34:10,716 This is me today. 330 00:34:11,592 --> 00:34:14,011 I pretty much lost all contact with Bill, 331 00:34:14,094 --> 00:34:15,179 and I'm good with that. 332 00:34:15,929 --> 00:34:17,473 He was kind of an arsehole anyways. 333 00:34:19,141 --> 00:34:20,267 I don't have any friends, 334 00:34:20,350 --> 00:34:22,644 and I do my best to stay away from family 335 00:34:23,228 --> 00:34:25,272 for fear that if the monkey returns, 336 00:34:25,355 --> 00:34:26,857 it'll kill someone close to me. 337 00:34:28,192 --> 00:34:29,902 But staying away from family, 338 00:34:29,985 --> 00:34:30,986 Excuse me! 339 00:34:31,070 --> 00:34:32,321 That's easier said than done 340 00:34:32,404 --> 00:34:33,947 Well, fuck your mother! 341 00:34:36,075 --> 00:34:37,159 Hey, Dwayne. 342 00:34:40,370 --> 00:34:42,122 Oh, man! Come in, come in. 343 00:34:42,206 --> 00:34:43,457 Oh no, it's cool 344 00:34:43,540 --> 00:34:45,793 I gotta run early today I gotta pick up my kid. 345 00:34:46,668 --> 00:34:48,045 Wait, you got a kid? 346 00:34:48,754 --> 00:34:50,422 Shit, man, that sucks. 347 00:34:50,506 --> 00:34:51,715 Does it live with you? 348 00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:54,218 Uh, no, no he doesn't, 349 00:34:54,301 --> 00:34:56,470 but I get to see him once a year, 350 00:34:56,553 --> 00:34:59,139 so I'm taking him to Horror Heaven. 351 00:34:59,223 --> 00:35:00,224 Yeah. 352 00:35:01,141 --> 00:35:02,434 Roller coasters, I guess. 353 00:35:03,102 --> 00:35:04,186 Once a year? 354 00:35:04,895 --> 00:35:06,230 Shit, man, that sucks. 355 00:35:07,272 --> 00:35:11,068 I bet your ex-wife's some type of mega bitch, huh? 356 00:35:11,151 --> 00:35:12,152 Huh? 357 00:35:12,736 --> 00:35:15,864 Oh! No, the once-a-year thing, that was my idea. 358 00:35:16,740 --> 00:35:20,661 It turns out I'm kind of a bad influence, you know. 359 00:35:22,079 --> 00:35:24,039 "Here comes trouble." 360 00:35:24,665 --> 00:35:25,749 Who, you? 361 00:35:25,833 --> 00:35:27,417 It's not like, you know, 362 00:35:27,501 --> 00:35:30,379 I beheld a pale horse, and on it was a pale rider, 363 00:35:30,462 --> 00:35:33,006 and the rider's name was, you know, Death. 364 00:35:34,133 --> 00:35:35,134 But, uh. 365 00:35:37,344 --> 00:35:39,179 Yeah, there has been some death. 366 00:35:42,641 --> 00:35:44,017 Shit, man, that sucks 367 00:35:55,237 --> 00:35:58,490 Pff! Jet skis, come on Douchebag 368 00:36:07,708 --> 00:36:09,918 "Love Hal." 369 00:36:13,463 --> 00:36:14,464 Fuck 370 00:36:24,349 --> 00:36:26,310 Feel that parental energy 371 00:36:26,935 --> 00:36:28,687 transferred from you to me. 372 00:36:39,114 --> 00:36:41,200 Petey's been asking about you more and more, Hal. 373 00:36:42,201 --> 00:36:43,452 And it's breaking our hearts. 374 00:36:46,413 --> 00:36:47,497 About me? 375 00:36:48,207 --> 00:36:49,458 What about me? Why? 376 00:36:50,167 --> 00:36:51,919 Because you're his father. 377 00:36:52,002 --> 00:36:54,171 And he's doing a family tree school project. 378 00:36:54,254 --> 00:36:56,965 And like it or not, you're one of the branches. 379 00:36:57,049 --> 00:36:58,258 Look, I 380 00:36:58,342 --> 00:36:59,968 I care about Petey 381 00:37:00,052 --> 00:37:01,803 I do Like, I. 382 00:37:03,555 --> 00:37:05,933 I care about him a lot, like, a lot, lot. 383 00:37:06,016 --> 00:37:08,477 Just now, when we were on the couch together, 384 00:37:09,561 --> 00:37:10,938 I took your power. 385 00:37:11,021 --> 00:37:13,482 Whoa, whoa, whoa, I never said you could take my power. 386 00:37:13,565 --> 00:37:14,733 It doesn't matter anymore 387 00:37:15,609 --> 00:37:16,610 Ted has decided 388 00:37:16,693 --> 00:37:18,320 to legally adopt Petey - What? 389 00:37:18,403 --> 00:37:19,964 And once the adoption's finalized 390 00:37:19,988 --> 00:37:23,075 it won't be necessary for you to see Petey at all. 391 00:37:23,158 --> 00:37:24,868 But you can't just do that. 392 00:37:25,410 --> 00:37:26,745 He can't just do that. 393 00:37:27,537 --> 00:37:29,248 As the leading expert in my field, 394 00:37:30,290 --> 00:37:31,291 can't I? 395 00:37:32,167 --> 00:37:35,045 Listen, you and Petey have this time. 396 00:37:35,796 --> 00:37:38,090 So just take the week, 397 00:37:38,173 --> 00:37:40,717 lock in some nice memories, 398 00:37:40,801 --> 00:37:42,261 and then cleanly cut it off. 399 00:37:42,928 --> 00:37:44,346 Like a vestigial tail. 400 00:37:47,724 --> 00:37:49,601 That's what you want Isn't it? 401 00:37:49,685 --> 00:37:52,271 No It's not what I want 402 00:37:52,354 --> 00:37:55,023 I want to spend time with Petey It's just, you know 403 00:37:55,649 --> 00:37:57,192 Vestigial? 404 00:37:57,276 --> 00:37:59,128 It means something that has become functionless, 405 00:37:59,152 --> 00:38:00,862 and as a result, is no longer necessary 406 00:38:00,946 --> 00:38:02,590 - I know what it means, Ted. - I'm sure you do 407 00:38:02,614 --> 00:38:04,700 I do - Well, I have your power, so. 408 00:38:04,783 --> 00:38:07,119 Well, I peed in one of your bushes on the way in, so. 409 00:38:07,202 --> 00:38:09,746 Well, this is the part where I suggest that we arm wrestle. 410 00:38:09,830 --> 00:38:11,581 What? Arm wrestle for what? 411 00:38:11,665 --> 00:38:13,292 For all the marbles. 412 00:38:13,375 --> 00:38:16,128 And by marbles, I am, of course, referring to your little balls. 413 00:38:16,211 --> 00:38:17,587 - My... - Hey. 414 00:38:17,671 --> 00:38:18,797 Honey. 415 00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:21,008 Oh, Petey Hey. 416 00:38:22,217 --> 00:38:23,218 Hey, buddy. 417 00:38:24,094 --> 00:38:25,429 What are you guys talking about? 418 00:39:37,459 --> 00:39:38,519 What do you mean, 419 00:39:38,543 --> 00:39:40,170 it reminds you of your dad? 420 00:39:42,714 --> 00:39:44,383 You talking about the shit-eating grin 421 00:39:44,466 --> 00:39:47,052 or the hairy back and arms? 422 00:39:50,889 --> 00:39:52,682 Do you ever wonder where he is? 423 00:39:53,975 --> 00:39:55,143 Dad, I mean. 424 00:39:57,354 --> 00:39:59,815 Baby, that ain't worth it. 425 00:40:02,359 --> 00:40:04,111 But if you're really looking for an answer, 426 00:40:04,194 --> 00:40:06,780 I'd have to go with either 427 00:40:08,740 --> 00:40:11,576 at a card table or under a hooker. 428 00:40:11,660 --> 00:40:13,203 Oh, sick, Ma Come on. 429 00:40:13,286 --> 00:40:14,287 Gross 430 00:40:17,833 --> 00:40:19,209 Hey, Beauchamps, honey, 431 00:40:20,502 --> 00:40:21,545 you want a drag? 432 00:40:26,842 --> 00:40:29,594 But are you still thinking of selling that monkey thing 433 00:40:29,678 --> 00:40:31,430 to the nut who never leaves his house? 434 00:40:33,473 --> 00:40:36,268 I mean, have you ever even met this guy face to face? 435 00:40:36,893 --> 00:40:39,688 Sounds like a real fucking pervert to me 436 00:40:52,409 --> 00:40:55,120 So, do you have any brothers or sisters? 437 00:40:57,456 --> 00:40:58,696 Is that your family tree thing? 438 00:40:59,958 --> 00:41:01,084 What gave it away? 439 00:41:03,211 --> 00:41:04,212 Okay. 440 00:41:06,256 --> 00:41:07,466 So, um 441 00:41:08,216 --> 00:41:09,843 brothers, sisters? 442 00:41:10,510 --> 00:41:11,553 Yes, no? 443 00:41:12,512 --> 00:41:14,764 Uh no. 444 00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:17,684 No to both? 445 00:41:18,185 --> 00:41:19,311 Yeah, no, neither. 446 00:41:19,811 --> 00:41:21,771 Only child just like me. 447 00:41:25,567 --> 00:41:27,694 And, uh, what's your mum's name? 448 00:41:30,697 --> 00:41:31,865 Um. 449 00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:35,368 Lois. 450 00:41:36,828 --> 00:41:38,121 My mum's name was 451 00:41:39,789 --> 00:41:40,790 Lois 452 00:41:46,630 --> 00:41:48,131 Hey, uh Oof. 453 00:41:49,049 --> 00:41:50,675 It's getting kind of late, darn 454 00:41:50,759 --> 00:41:52,802 I should get you some, uh, some dinner, huh? 455 00:41:53,553 --> 00:41:56,848 Only if you want me to, like, survive. 456 00:42:04,898 --> 00:42:05,899 Cool 457 00:42:55,699 --> 00:42:58,410 Say it, or I'll eat the rest of your placenta. 458 00:42:58,493 --> 00:42:59,887 I promise to pretend to be sad 459 00:42:59,911 --> 00:43:01,079 when you're dead. 460 00:43:01,162 --> 00:43:02,282 What the fuck?! 461 00:43:16,303 --> 00:43:17,304 Christ. 462 00:43:28,607 --> 00:43:29,899 What the fuck? 463 00:43:59,387 --> 00:44:00,472 Hello. 464 00:44:02,015 --> 00:44:03,391 Well, hello, dumb shit 465 00:44:08,980 --> 00:44:10,440 Bill. 466 00:44:10,523 --> 00:44:13,068 Can't be the only person who calls you dumb shit. 467 00:44:13,693 --> 00:44:15,695 How did you know how to reach me, Bill? 468 00:44:15,779 --> 00:44:17,739 I haven't heard from you in, what, five years? 469 00:44:17,822 --> 00:44:19,491 Haven't seen you in something like 10? 470 00:44:20,241 --> 00:44:22,827 Nine and eleven, and those are just numbers. 471 00:44:23,536 --> 00:44:24,788 The police gave me yours. 472 00:44:25,413 --> 00:44:26,956 What do you mean, the police? 473 00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:28,249 I have news. 474 00:44:29,334 --> 00:44:31,628 Aunt Ida is no more. 475 00:44:31,711 --> 00:44:32,796 Oh, shit. 476 00:44:33,797 --> 00:44:35,548 Well, I guess she was kind of old. 477 00:44:35,632 --> 00:44:36,966 Was she sick or something? 478 00:44:38,051 --> 00:44:39,761 Actually, it seems the old girl 479 00:44:39,844 --> 00:44:41,805 was having somewhat of a renaissance, 480 00:44:42,430 --> 00:44:45,266 putting her house on the market, cleaning out her closet. 481 00:44:45,934 --> 00:44:47,769 The nice young policewoman I spoke to 482 00:44:48,687 --> 00:44:51,523 used the phrase, "freak accident". 483 00:44:53,983 --> 00:44:55,485 Okay, and? What? 484 00:44:56,319 --> 00:44:58,047 Someone has to go through her belongings, 485 00:44:58,071 --> 00:44:59,364 and you're the next of kin. 486 00:44:59,447 --> 00:45:01,658 Technically, you're the next of kin, Bill. 487 00:45:02,826 --> 00:45:04,703 This is my week with Petey, so no. 488 00:45:04,786 --> 00:45:06,786 Your week? That's all you get with your son? 489 00:45:07,747 --> 00:45:09,916 - Also, you're weak - What do you want, Bill? 490 00:45:09,999 --> 00:45:13,503 Go to Aunt Ida's house and make sure "it" isn't there. 491 00:45:13,586 --> 00:45:15,380 "It" is at the bottom of a well. 492 00:45:15,463 --> 00:45:17,799 "It" can teleport and you know it. 493 00:45:17,882 --> 00:45:19,801 Why don't you bring Petey along, hmm? 494 00:45:19,884 --> 00:45:21,928 Let him see you being brave for a change 495 00:45:22,011 --> 00:45:23,011 Jesus. 496 00:45:23,555 --> 00:45:26,391 What do fathers and their estranged sons 497 00:45:26,474 --> 00:45:27,892 say to each other? 498 00:45:27,976 --> 00:45:29,060 Road trip? 499 00:45:29,144 --> 00:45:30,687 Why would it be at Aunt Ida's anyway? 500 00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,206 Because it's attached itself to our family 501 00:45:32,230 --> 00:45:33,356 and likes to kill us. 502 00:45:33,440 --> 00:45:34,959 And I don't want to die, and presumably 503 00:45:34,983 --> 00:45:36,568 you don't want Petey to die either 504 00:45:36,651 --> 00:45:37,878 And what if I find it, huh? 505 00:45:37,902 --> 00:45:39,279 What am I supposed to do, 506 00:45:39,362 --> 00:45:41,448 drop it from a fucking plane? It'll probably bounce! 507 00:45:41,531 --> 00:45:43,700 No, you never let it out of your sight again, 508 00:45:43,783 --> 00:45:45,118 so no one turns the key. 509 00:45:45,201 --> 00:45:46,637 Presumably you don't want Petey to... 510 00:45:46,661 --> 00:45:48,872 Stop talking about Petey. 511 00:45:50,290 --> 00:45:51,791 The monkey must be vanquished. 512 00:45:52,834 --> 00:45:54,794 Why don't you vanquish it, huh, Bill? 513 00:45:56,588 --> 00:45:57,756 You're smaller, you go 514 00:45:59,466 --> 00:46:01,092 Bill Bi Fuck! 515 00:46:04,179 --> 00:46:06,639 Fuck! 516 00:46:12,812 --> 00:46:14,314 Fuck! What the fuck? 517 00:46:14,397 --> 00:46:15,815 Is that a leg? Fuck! 518 00:46:46,721 --> 00:46:47,847 Okay, okay. 519 00:46:48,431 --> 00:46:49,766 Petey, wake up Come on - What? 520 00:46:49,849 --> 00:46:51,449 We gotta go Let's go - What time is it? 521 00:46:52,268 --> 00:46:53,269 What the fuck? 522 00:46:53,353 --> 00:46:54,354 Hey, language. 523 00:46:54,437 --> 00:46:55,730 And we gotta go, all right? 524 00:46:55,814 --> 00:46:58,691 There was a thing outside. 525 00:46:58,775 --> 00:47:00,193 It wasn't a thing. 526 00:47:00,276 --> 00:47:03,029 It was a woman, and either way, we gotta split. 527 00:47:03,112 --> 00:47:04,405 All right? So come on, let's go. 528 00:47:04,489 --> 00:47:06,199 It's the middle of the night Are you high? 529 00:47:06,282 --> 00:47:07,408 No, I wish, Jesus Christ. 530 00:47:07,492 --> 00:47:09,661 No, don't do drugs I mean it. 531 00:47:09,744 --> 00:47:11,246 But come on, let's go Hurry up 532 00:47:11,329 --> 00:47:12,413 I'm going to bed. 533 00:47:33,893 --> 00:47:36,729 Hey, Petey, uh sorry about that. 534 00:47:37,522 --> 00:47:39,023 It's just that my aunt Ida died, 535 00:47:39,107 --> 00:47:41,276 and I gotta deal with a lot of her stuff. 536 00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:43,862 Can I ask you a question? 537 00:47:43,945 --> 00:47:45,280 I'd really rather you didn't. 538 00:47:47,156 --> 00:47:48,241 How'd your mum die? 539 00:47:51,494 --> 00:47:53,097 Is this for your family tree thing? 540 00:47:53,121 --> 00:47:54,932 Because usually family trees are about the whos 541 00:47:54,956 --> 00:47:58,918 and the whens, not the whys and the, you know, how. 542 00:48:00,128 --> 00:48:02,409 Was your aunt the one that raised you after your mum died? 543 00:48:03,798 --> 00:48:07,051 Uh, yeah 544 00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:08,928 Yeah, yeah, she did. 545 00:48:12,140 --> 00:48:13,349 Maybe you could, uh, 546 00:48:14,225 --> 00:48:15,935 take me to your aunt's house with you 547 00:48:16,019 --> 00:48:17,539 I could help you with her stuff and... 548 00:48:17,604 --> 00:48:18,938 You're not coming with me, Petey. 549 00:48:19,022 --> 00:48:20,023 Why not? 550 00:48:20,106 --> 00:48:21,900 Because it's depressing, all right? 551 00:48:21,983 --> 00:48:23,610 We were supposed to go to a theme park, 552 00:48:23,693 --> 00:48:25,278 not into, you know 553 00:48:26,529 --> 00:48:28,281 Darkness and death 554 00:48:28,364 --> 00:48:29,866 I know about the adoption, Hal. 555 00:48:35,580 --> 00:48:36,581 Oh. 556 00:48:37,540 --> 00:48:39,083 And so you can either just 557 00:48:40,084 --> 00:48:42,045 cut me off and cut this off, 558 00:48:43,046 --> 00:48:44,672 or we can spend 559 00:48:44,756 --> 00:48:47,383 the rest of the little time that we have left together 560 00:48:49,510 --> 00:48:50,511 together. 561 00:48:55,308 --> 00:48:57,018 I wonder which one Lois would have chosen 562 00:49:10,782 --> 00:49:13,034 What are you doing in here all alone, Hal? 563 00:49:13,910 --> 00:49:15,411 Or do I not want to know? 564 00:49:16,537 --> 00:49:17,956 Just thinking, I guess. 565 00:49:18,039 --> 00:49:19,040 Oh, yeah? 566 00:49:20,166 --> 00:49:22,210 - About what? - I don't know. 567 00:49:22,835 --> 00:49:23,836 The future 568 00:49:25,630 --> 00:49:26,881 You got any advice? 569 00:49:27,757 --> 00:49:30,885 Um, well 570 00:49:32,053 --> 00:49:33,262 take care of your teeth. 571 00:49:35,098 --> 00:49:36,891 And take care of your gut. 572 00:49:37,684 --> 00:49:39,227 And take life as it comes. 573 00:49:39,310 --> 00:49:41,854 You know, the worst thing you can do is try to force it. 574 00:49:42,730 --> 00:49:46,275 But really, I think that the most important thing 575 00:49:46,359 --> 00:49:48,569 for you to remember is 576 00:49:51,072 --> 00:49:53,282 try not to kill everybody around you 577 00:50:05,586 --> 00:50:06,587 Petey? Pe. 578 00:50:10,299 --> 00:50:11,300 Petey? 579 00:50:15,471 --> 00:50:16,472 Petey? 580 00:50:18,224 --> 00:50:19,642 Hey, Petey, buddy? 581 00:50:21,769 --> 00:50:23,169 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 582 00:50:23,771 --> 00:50:24,939 Fuck, fuck, fuck 583 00:50:41,164 --> 00:50:43,041 Check it out There's a place in town. 584 00:50:43,124 --> 00:50:44,435 They do skydiving lessons. 585 00:50:44,459 --> 00:50:45,853 I feel like it's one of those things 586 00:50:45,877 --> 00:50:47,920 where you're either really good at it or you aren't. 587 00:50:48,004 --> 00:50:49,440 It only takes one lesson to find out 588 00:50:50,965 --> 00:50:51,966 Hey, funny. 589 00:50:52,050 --> 00:50:54,135 That's that's funny. 590 00:50:54,886 --> 00:50:57,513 Yeah? Well, you're kind of funny too, Hal. 591 00:50:58,556 --> 00:51:00,933 Oh, and they do weddings. 592 00:51:15,073 --> 00:51:17,325 Hey, uh, do me a favour, all right? 593 00:51:17,408 --> 00:51:19,702 Uh, wait in the car while I deal with this. 594 00:51:20,244 --> 00:51:21,788 What? No way 595 00:51:21,871 --> 00:51:23,766 I want to see your old room like they do in the movies. 596 00:51:23,790 --> 00:51:24,832 No, Petey. 597 00:51:24,916 --> 00:51:26,000 Why not? 598 00:51:26,084 --> 00:51:28,669 Just because because I said so. 599 00:51:29,295 --> 00:51:30,880 All right Fine. 600 00:51:31,839 --> 00:51:33,508 Then I have to go number two. 601 00:51:34,467 --> 00:51:36,385 What? Why didn't you go at the motel? 602 00:51:36,469 --> 00:51:38,554 There's a lot you don't know about me, Hal. 603 00:51:38,638 --> 00:51:40,056 For instance, 604 00:51:40,139 --> 00:51:43,017 I'm one of those kids that can only go poo in a house 605 00:51:43,101 --> 00:51:45,019 Are you being serious? 606 00:51:47,105 --> 00:51:48,731 It's a tough bet to lose, Hal 607 00:51:51,317 --> 00:51:52,652 Jesus Christ. 608 00:51:52,735 --> 00:51:53,903 Hi. 609 00:51:53,986 --> 00:51:56,447 Hey there Sorry Ah 610 00:51:56,531 --> 00:51:58,032 Oh, window won't go down. 611 00:51:58,116 --> 00:51:59,534 Yeah, okay - Hey there. 612 00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:01,619 - How are you? - Hi! I'm Barbara. 613 00:52:01,702 --> 00:52:03,746 Hi - You must be Hal Shelborn. 614 00:52:03,830 --> 00:52:06,082 Your brother Bill Shelborn said you'd be coming. 615 00:52:06,165 --> 00:52:07,750 Oh, yeah, right, right. 616 00:52:07,834 --> 00:52:09,043 Uh, hi, Barbara Yeah. 617 00:52:09,127 --> 00:52:10,521 That brother Bill of yours 618 00:52:10,545 --> 00:52:12,380 is quite the character, isn't he? 619 00:52:12,463 --> 00:52:14,298 Yeah - Your brother Bill, I mean! 620 00:52:14,382 --> 00:52:16,843 Yes, yes He's quite the character Yeah. 621 00:52:16,926 --> 00:52:19,178 Yeah Wow, who's this little slugger? 622 00:52:19,262 --> 00:52:21,222 Oh, this is, uh, this is my son, Petey. 623 00:52:21,305 --> 00:52:23,349 Oh, hello there. 624 00:52:23,432 --> 00:52:24,600 Oh, no, thanks, Barbara 625 00:52:24,684 --> 00:52:27,395 I'm just a kid who doesn't buy many houses. 626 00:52:27,478 --> 00:52:29,772 But I also didn't know that I have an uncle. 627 00:52:29,856 --> 00:52:31,899 So, yeah, thanks for that. 628 00:52:31,983 --> 00:52:34,360 Um, it's funny, because I actually asked Hal here 629 00:52:34,443 --> 00:52:36,070 if he had any siblings yesterday. 630 00:52:36,154 --> 00:52:37,864 But he flat out lied to my face. 631 00:52:37,947 --> 00:52:39,323 Well - But it's cool. 632 00:52:39,407 --> 00:52:41,367 He's only going to be my dad for, like, 633 00:52:41,450 --> 00:52:42,827 a few more days anyway, 634 00:52:42,910 --> 00:52:45,663 'cause he's being swapped out for a leading expert. 635 00:52:47,248 --> 00:52:48,666 Yeah - Okay 636 00:52:50,585 --> 00:52:52,253 Well - So no card Okay. 637 00:52:52,336 --> 00:52:53,776 No card, yeah - Let's see the house. 638 00:52:56,048 --> 00:52:57,675 Were you and your aunt very close? 639 00:52:57,758 --> 00:52:59,010 Uh, sure Very. 640 00:52:59,093 --> 00:53:00,511 Is this all her stuff? 641 00:53:00,595 --> 00:53:02,346 I felt like she had more stuff. 642 00:53:02,430 --> 00:53:04,557 Oh, well, we did have that estate sale 643 00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:06,309 the day after she died. 644 00:53:06,392 --> 00:53:08,311 We had a great turnout, too. 645 00:53:08,394 --> 00:53:10,646 We must have made over $100, ha! 646 00:53:10,730 --> 00:53:11,814 Right. 647 00:53:11,898 --> 00:53:12,899 Okay. 648 00:53:13,983 --> 00:53:17,278 Now, let's see, that would have been on Sunday, 649 00:53:17,361 --> 00:53:19,030 because ever since Monday, 650 00:53:19,113 --> 00:53:22,783 things have been a bit, uh, messy around here. 651 00:53:22,867 --> 00:53:25,203 Yeah Your aunt, of course, was Monday 652 00:53:26,662 --> 00:53:28,039 And then, oh Lord, 653 00:53:28,122 --> 00:53:29,957 first thing Tuesday, it was Mitch McDonald 654 00:53:37,423 --> 00:53:40,259 And then Wednesday was Burt Burgerson 655 00:53:46,265 --> 00:53:48,017 And then Nancy Risoli 656 00:53:55,107 --> 00:53:58,277 But there aren't any cobras in Maine, I mean, are there? 657 00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:01,739 Well, there was the one. 658 00:54:03,908 --> 00:54:05,284 No, every day since Monday, 659 00:54:05,368 --> 00:54:08,204 at least one Casco local has just poof! 660 00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:12,375 Sometimes two or three or four 661 00:54:12,458 --> 00:54:16,003 or even five Casco locals have just poof. 662 00:54:16,087 --> 00:54:17,838 - Right OK. - And poof and poof! 663 00:54:17,922 --> 00:54:20,007 Great, yeah, yeah, no, I get it. 664 00:54:20,091 --> 00:54:22,760 Could we look at the other closet? It's this way, I think. 665 00:54:23,678 --> 00:54:25,429 Absolutely, follow me. 666 00:54:25,513 --> 00:54:26,514 Poof! 667 00:54:40,236 --> 00:54:42,154 You're fucking twins? 668 00:54:43,572 --> 00:54:45,574 You know, my mother used to always say 669 00:54:45,658 --> 00:54:47,493 whenever there was a plane crash 670 00:54:47,576 --> 00:54:49,787 or a school bus going off into the river 671 00:54:49,870 --> 00:54:52,456 and mass fatalities or what have you. 672 00:54:52,540 --> 00:54:53,958 She used to always say, 673 00:54:54,041 --> 00:54:56,836 "Looks like God's bowling strikes tonight" 674 00:55:01,257 --> 00:55:02,300 Oh, that's odd 675 00:55:02,383 --> 00:55:04,010 I don't remember locking this. 676 00:55:04,093 --> 00:55:05,533 Hey, you wouldn't happen to remember 677 00:55:05,594 --> 00:55:10,057 if my aunt had a wind-up toy monkey at the yard sale? 678 00:55:10,141 --> 00:55:12,476 Oh, no, I don't think so. 679 00:55:13,019 --> 00:55:16,856 Oh, not a cherished childhood memory, now, was it? 680 00:55:16,939 --> 00:55:19,567 Oh, a first little furry friend 681 00:55:19,650 --> 00:55:21,319 filled with whimsy and wonder? 682 00:55:21,402 --> 00:55:23,696 No, it's no big deal Thanks. 683 00:55:23,779 --> 00:55:25,114 Okay. 684 00:55:28,075 --> 00:55:30,911 Nope, not that one 685 00:55:32,621 --> 00:55:34,582 How are we doing with that key? 686 00:55:34,665 --> 00:55:38,085 Oh Don't you worry your pretty little head. 687 00:55:38,169 --> 00:55:40,546 Oh mercy, did I say that out loud? 688 00:55:41,881 --> 00:55:42,923 Watch out! 689 00:55:43,924 --> 00:55:45,343 You are pretty, though 690 00:56:01,150 --> 00:56:02,485 - Oh! - You know what? 691 00:56:02,568 --> 00:56:03,837 - I think we should go down. - It looks like I did 692 00:56:03,861 --> 00:56:06,197 my own little process of elimination! 693 00:56:08,115 --> 00:56:09,658 No, no, no! 694 00:56:20,586 --> 00:56:21,921 Everything okay up there? 695 00:56:29,011 --> 00:56:30,721 Yeah, everything's fine 696 00:56:39,188 --> 00:56:40,481 Oh, fuck 697 00:56:53,119 --> 00:56:54,888 And you were just standing there, 698 00:56:54,912 --> 00:56:56,232 hands to yourself, is that right? 699 00:56:56,288 --> 00:56:57,873 Yeah, that's right. 700 00:56:57,957 --> 00:57:00,376 And you knew there was a gun in the house, or not so much? 701 00:57:00,459 --> 00:57:01,627 Uh, no. 702 00:57:03,921 --> 00:57:04,964 Okay. 703 00:57:05,506 --> 00:57:07,146 I'm gonna have to ask you don't leave town 704 00:57:07,174 --> 00:57:08,654 until we can figure a few things out. 705 00:57:08,717 --> 00:57:09,969 What? No, no, no, officer 706 00:57:10,052 --> 00:57:11,530 I promised my son that I was gonna take him 707 00:57:11,554 --> 00:57:13,222 to Horror Heaven - Actually, officer, 708 00:57:13,305 --> 00:57:15,433 we moved off going to Horror Heaven. 709 00:57:15,516 --> 00:57:17,059 This is obviously far more important. 710 00:57:17,685 --> 00:57:19,103 Smart kid - Hmm. 711 00:57:19,770 --> 00:57:21,105 Find a motel 712 00:57:21,188 --> 00:57:24,483 I'd say stay here, but it's a goddamn mess in there 713 00:57:24,567 --> 00:57:26,485 I mean, have you actually been up there? 714 00:57:26,569 --> 00:57:27,820 It's like that restaurant. 715 00:57:28,571 --> 00:57:29,655 Spaghetti City. 716 00:57:33,033 --> 00:57:35,411 Hey, bud, you wanna go wait in the car? 717 00:57:35,494 --> 00:57:39,248 Yeah, that's your favourite thing for me to do anyway, isn't it? 718 00:57:39,957 --> 00:57:41,083 Just stay away 719 00:57:43,586 --> 00:57:45,254 They're bringing the body out! 720 00:57:52,636 --> 00:57:57,808 Let's go, Casco! Let's go, Casco! Let's go! 721 00:58:25,294 --> 00:58:26,629 Hello? 722 00:58:26,712 --> 00:58:29,465 Hal Shelborn, please, if he's available. 723 00:58:29,548 --> 00:58:31,342 - Bill? - Thank goodness. 724 00:58:31,425 --> 00:58:34,094 And Petey? Is he available, too? 725 00:58:34,178 --> 00:58:36,096 Yeah, look, we're fine, but, um. 726 00:58:37,014 --> 00:58:38,432 The monkey's not here. 727 00:58:38,516 --> 00:58:40,726 Aunt Ida had a goddamn yard sale, so it could've been, 728 00:58:40,809 --> 00:58:42,895 but now it could be anywhere with anyone. 729 00:58:42,978 --> 00:58:45,272 Well, that's not good That's bad. 730 00:58:45,356 --> 00:58:47,358 Yeah, there's all kinds of shit happening in town, 731 00:58:47,441 --> 00:58:49,318 people dying in not normal ways. 732 00:58:50,069 --> 00:58:51,695 Police told me I can't leave. 733 00:58:51,779 --> 00:58:53,656 Go to the motel Await my signal. 734 00:58:53,739 --> 00:58:55,407 Await your fucking signal?! 735 00:58:58,244 --> 00:58:59,537 Wait, Bill, where are you? 736 00:59:01,038 --> 00:59:02,665 Bill, are you living in town? 737 00:59:19,723 --> 00:59:20,724 Stupid. 738 00:59:27,731 --> 00:59:31,068 Shelborn, Shelborn Argh Nope. 739 00:59:45,249 --> 00:59:46,625 "Mrs Monkey"? 740 00:59:55,593 --> 00:59:56,594 Hello. 741 00:59:56,677 --> 00:59:58,721 If this is in regards to my ad, 742 00:59:58,804 --> 01:00:00,306 I'm happy to report that my quest 743 01:00:00,389 --> 01:00:03,309 for finding my beloved toy monkey is over. 744 01:00:03,851 --> 01:00:06,312 Thank you for calling and be safe out there 745 01:00:41,639 --> 01:00:44,391 At the very moment you slipped from my fingers, 746 01:00:45,976 --> 01:00:48,854 I suddenly knew the terrible truth about everything. 747 01:00:50,314 --> 01:00:51,732 That my dumb shit brother 748 01:00:51,815 --> 01:00:53,776 had turned your key and killed my mum 749 01:01:03,118 --> 01:01:05,746 So I went back to get you as soon as I could. 750 01:01:07,498 --> 01:01:08,999 But you were gone. 751 01:01:10,125 --> 01:01:13,545 Leaving behind a sign for me and only me. 752 01:01:14,296 --> 01:01:16,674 That one day, you'd be back. 753 01:01:18,550 --> 01:01:20,052 And so I waited. 754 01:01:22,846 --> 01:01:24,848 And for the longest time, 755 01:01:25,808 --> 01:01:27,351 there was nothing. 756 01:01:29,812 --> 01:01:33,357 A hundred percent, pure, medical-grade nothingness. 757 01:01:40,406 --> 01:01:41,448 But then 758 01:01:47,246 --> 01:01:48,914 there you were. 759 01:02:08,225 --> 01:02:12,062 Suddenly, everywhere I looked, you were there 760 01:02:12,146 --> 01:02:13,939 Oh, fuck! 761 01:02:15,023 --> 01:02:19,361 As constant as the sun, the moon, and the stars. 762 01:02:20,028 --> 01:02:22,239 As if you had always been looking down on me 763 01:02:24,199 --> 01:02:27,619 Letting me know what I had always wanted to be true. 764 01:02:29,121 --> 01:02:32,124 That you'd come back to help me seek my revenge. 765 01:02:36,670 --> 01:02:39,006 I returned to the places where I thought you might be. 766 01:02:39,631 --> 01:02:43,135 Foolishly believing that I could make you appear again. 767 01:02:43,218 --> 01:02:44,470 Fuck. 768 01:02:44,553 --> 01:02:46,972 That it was I who might find you again. 769 01:02:50,225 --> 01:02:52,603 So I made myself ready for your return. 770 01:02:56,315 --> 01:02:58,942 Reworking my old childhood funeral suit 771 01:02:59,026 --> 01:03:00,569 in anticipation of 772 01:03:01,779 --> 01:03:03,071 more funerals. 773 01:03:04,406 --> 01:03:06,325 And so that I might once again 774 01:03:06,408 --> 01:03:09,036 bear witness to your terrible glory. 775 01:03:09,119 --> 01:03:10,329 Fuck! 776 01:03:12,956 --> 01:03:16,835 So I looked, and behold, a pale horse, 777 01:03:17,836 --> 01:03:20,798 and his name that sat on him was Death. 778 01:03:20,881 --> 01:03:22,591 Mrs Monkey. 779 01:03:24,218 --> 01:03:25,719 And now, here we are. 780 01:03:26,678 --> 01:03:27,930 Together at last. 781 01:03:29,097 --> 01:03:32,351 With only one thing left to do 782 01:03:35,437 --> 01:03:36,897 In your infinite wisdom, 783 01:03:38,315 --> 01:03:40,943 I trust your flaming sword of righteousness 784 01:03:42,277 --> 01:03:44,029 will cut the foul air 785 01:03:45,113 --> 01:03:47,533 and smite the right person. 786 01:03:48,784 --> 01:03:51,703 And I know you know exactly who I'm talking about 787 01:04:08,470 --> 01:04:10,138 Shit, man, that sucks 788 01:04:16,186 --> 01:04:17,813 Shit, man, that sucks! Ah! 789 01:04:22,568 --> 01:04:23,652 What? 790 01:04:23,735 --> 01:04:26,029 Um, uh, it's Ricky 791 01:04:26,113 --> 01:04:27,823 What is it? I'm extremely busy. 792 01:04:27,906 --> 01:04:29,741 Okay, yeah, so 793 01:04:29,825 --> 01:04:32,244 I hope this isn't weird, but I was wondering, 794 01:04:32,327 --> 01:04:34,913 you know, if maybe I could give you your 15 bucks back 795 01:04:34,997 --> 01:04:36,999 and instead I could just keep the toy monkey thing. 796 01:04:37,082 --> 01:04:39,376 It's not a toy, don't ever call it that. 797 01:04:39,459 --> 01:04:42,212 Right, yeah, no, I thought the same thing too. 798 01:04:42,296 --> 01:04:44,381 It just sort of makes me think about my dad, 799 01:04:44,464 --> 01:04:45,966 which I know is kind of a weird thing 800 01:04:46,049 --> 01:04:48,218 for, like, a guy to say, like, to another guy. 801 01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:56,393 Does it hurt very much when you think, Ricky? 802 01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:02,274 - Well... - "Uh Well, well..." 803 01:05:02,983 --> 01:05:07,487 Did you know that 27% of all English-speaking people 804 01:05:07,571 --> 01:05:11,533 will either say, "oh, shit" or "holy shit" before they die? 805 01:05:12,409 --> 01:05:13,744 Now it's funny, because death 806 01:05:13,827 --> 01:05:16,204 is the one big thing that'll happen to all of us, 807 01:05:16,288 --> 01:05:21,251 and yet we still can't help but be somehow surprised by it. 808 01:05:24,504 --> 01:05:25,923 Right on, man. 809 01:05:27,507 --> 01:05:28,508 So anyway, 810 01:05:28,592 --> 01:05:30,469 I saw your brother. 811 01:05:30,552 --> 01:05:32,012 He looks like you. 812 01:05:32,596 --> 01:05:34,097 With that's, like, uh 813 01:05:34,806 --> 01:05:36,159 that's, like, your nephew then, huh? 814 01:05:41,063 --> 01:05:43,607 What if Petey turned the key? 815 01:05:45,859 --> 01:05:47,861 So so, can I have it back? 816 01:05:48,445 --> 01:05:50,697 Never I employed you to find the monkey, 817 01:05:50,781 --> 01:05:52,282 not to fall in love with it. 818 01:05:52,366 --> 01:05:53,450 Now fuck off. 819 01:05:59,998 --> 01:06:01,166 Fuck you 820 01:06:10,467 --> 01:06:13,136 Hey, Ma, are you home or are you at the factory? 821 01:06:23,563 --> 01:06:24,648 Lousy deadbeat. 822 01:06:34,825 --> 01:06:35,993 Yo, Beauchamps! 823 01:06:36,076 --> 01:06:37,869 You got any extra bullets? 824 01:06:40,372 --> 01:06:41,415 What calibre? 825 01:06:49,047 --> 01:06:51,216 Hey, you still got some of Barbara's blood on you. 826 01:06:54,094 --> 01:06:55,095 Yeah. 827 01:06:57,639 --> 01:06:59,057 Accidents happen. 828 01:07:02,644 --> 01:07:03,937 Can I ask you a question? 829 01:07:04,980 --> 01:07:06,231 Ha ha. 830 01:07:06,314 --> 01:07:07,482 Uh, nope. 831 01:07:11,611 --> 01:07:12,612 You ever killed a man? 832 01:07:14,573 --> 01:07:16,450 I 833 01:07:20,328 --> 01:07:21,329 Jesus. 834 01:07:22,497 --> 01:07:23,498 Does Mum know? 835 01:07:23,582 --> 01:07:26,084 No, I haven't killed anybody. 836 01:07:26,168 --> 01:07:28,253 Of course I haven't killed anybody. 837 01:07:29,963 --> 01:07:32,424 Look, when we get back to the motel, I'm gonna call your mum 838 01:07:32,507 --> 01:07:34,551 and I'm gonna tell her what happened. 839 01:07:35,385 --> 01:07:38,138 She'll think I'm not safe to be around and 840 01:07:38,889 --> 01:07:40,098 she'll be right. 841 01:07:40,932 --> 01:07:42,517 So Ted will just adopt me and 842 01:07:43,101 --> 01:07:44,603 you'll never have to see me again? 843 01:07:47,314 --> 01:07:49,191 You're better off with Ted, all right? 844 01:07:55,072 --> 01:07:56,198 Fuck you, man 845 01:08:04,748 --> 01:08:05,874 Hey, Petey 846 01:08:10,170 --> 01:08:11,797 Well, I'm here if you need me. 847 01:08:15,258 --> 01:08:17,427 You just do your thing in the bathroom, okay? 848 01:08:18,095 --> 01:08:20,180 And if you wanna have a talk, 849 01:08:20,263 --> 01:08:22,224 we can have a proper talk, all right, buddy? 850 01:08:33,985 --> 01:08:35,153 Yes? 851 01:08:35,237 --> 01:08:37,447 It's me. You have it, don't you? 852 01:08:37,531 --> 01:08:38,740 I don't know, maybe. 853 01:08:38,824 --> 01:08:40,325 Come on, Bill, Mrs Monkey? 854 01:08:40,408 --> 01:08:41,827 I know you are, but what am I? 855 01:08:41,910 --> 01:08:43,370 Stop turning the key! 856 01:08:43,453 --> 01:08:46,414 Its arms aren't fucking long enough or articulate enough 857 01:08:46,498 --> 01:08:48,917 to reach back there itself, so somebody has to. 858 01:08:50,627 --> 01:08:51,628 And also, no. 859 01:08:51,711 --> 01:08:53,839 Jesus fucking Christ, Bill, 860 01:08:53,922 --> 01:08:55,340 these are innocent people. 861 01:08:55,423 --> 01:08:58,051 Look, I I don't care about me. 862 01:08:58,593 --> 01:09:01,721 All that matters is that Petey is safe, so stop turning it. 863 01:09:01,805 --> 01:09:03,431 If you want me to stop turning the key, 864 01:09:03,515 --> 01:09:05,600 bring Petey to me so he can turn it instead. 865 01:09:05,684 --> 01:09:07,435 What? No Why? 866 01:09:07,519 --> 01:09:09,688 The person who turns the key never dies. 867 01:09:10,522 --> 01:09:12,667 You've known that since we were kids, haven't you, Hal? 868 01:09:12,691 --> 01:09:13,692 What? 869 01:09:14,359 --> 01:09:15,610 What are you talking about? 870 01:09:17,279 --> 01:09:18,530 Where are you, Bill? 871 01:09:18,613 --> 01:09:20,053 If you want Petey to be safe, 872 01:09:20,115 --> 01:09:22,617 all Petey has to do is turn the key 873 01:09:22,701 --> 01:09:26,746 and keep turning the key forever and ever and ever, 874 01:09:26,830 --> 01:09:28,832 and Petey will never die. 875 01:09:28,915 --> 01:09:30,667 Listen to me, Bill, all right? 876 01:09:30,750 --> 01:09:33,086 Let me get Petey out of here, then we'll talk, all right? 877 01:09:33,170 --> 01:09:35,088 We'll figure out what we're gonna do. 878 01:09:35,172 --> 01:09:38,049 Either I keep turning the key or Petey turns the key. 879 01:09:38,967 --> 01:09:40,969 Call me back when you made your decision. 880 01:09:41,052 --> 01:09:42,387 Wait, wait, wait, wait! 881 01:09:42,470 --> 01:09:43,630 Bill, Bi... 882 01:09:43,680 --> 01:09:44,806 Fuck! 883 01:09:51,646 --> 01:09:53,231 Hey, Petey? Petey? 884 01:09:55,483 --> 01:09:56,484 Hey, Petey? 885 01:09:57,110 --> 01:09:58,778 Hey, buddy, we gotta go, all right? 886 01:09:59,404 --> 01:10:00,822 I gotta take you back to your mum's 887 01:10:02,532 --> 01:10:03,909 Petey, open the door! Come on! 888 01:10:06,494 --> 01:10:07,495 Petey! 889 01:10:08,914 --> 01:10:10,207 Petey, open the door! 890 01:10:11,625 --> 01:10:13,376 Come on, we gotta go right now! 891 01:10:15,712 --> 01:10:17,547 Jesus Christ 892 01:10:17,631 --> 01:10:18,840 Don't have a heart attack. 893 01:10:20,467 --> 01:10:23,136 Or do, you know? You want out of my life so bad, 894 01:10:23,220 --> 01:10:24,638 it might just be a nice shortcut 895 01:10:24,721 --> 01:10:26,616 Petey, what the fuck? Why didn't you answer the door? 896 01:10:26,640 --> 01:10:28,409 Why do you care? Why would you even have a kid 897 01:10:28,433 --> 01:10:30,494 if all you're gonna do is just keep yourself away from me? 898 01:10:30,518 --> 01:10:32,163 I didn't exactly know what I was doing, all right? 899 01:10:32,187 --> 01:10:34,314 I was just a stupid, dumb kid. 900 01:10:34,397 --> 01:10:35,750 So I was an accident? Is that what you're saying? 901 01:10:35,774 --> 01:10:38,068 Everything is an accident, yes. 902 01:10:41,613 --> 01:10:43,114 Wow, nice one. 903 01:10:45,116 --> 01:10:46,117 Great to hear. 904 01:10:52,123 --> 01:10:53,833 I That's not what I 905 01:11:00,548 --> 01:11:02,592 Yes, it was an accident, Petey. 906 01:11:06,471 --> 01:11:07,764 But you are not a mistake. 907 01:11:12,018 --> 01:11:14,354 I'm so glad you're here with me. 908 01:11:16,356 --> 01:11:17,607 You're very precious to me. 909 01:11:20,902 --> 01:11:22,612 But that's why I stay away, because I. 910 01:11:23,363 --> 01:11:25,782 I come with all sorts of weird baggage, 911 01:11:25,865 --> 01:11:27,551 and I don't want you to have to deal with that. 912 01:11:27,575 --> 01:11:28,952 - Like what? - Like. 913 01:11:29,786 --> 01:11:31,621 Bad stuff, Petey, like 914 01:11:33,206 --> 01:11:34,374 like evil stuff. 915 01:11:35,750 --> 01:11:38,295 Stuff I got from my dad, and I don't want to pass it on to you. 916 01:11:38,378 --> 01:11:40,005 What are you talking about? Like what? 917 01:11:40,088 --> 01:11:41,131 Like 918 01:11:47,387 --> 01:11:48,388 Hold on. 919 01:11:50,056 --> 01:11:52,142 Open up, it's the motherfucking police! 920 01:11:53,435 --> 01:11:56,146 All right, all right 921 01:11:57,314 --> 01:11:59,441 Shut up! Shut up and hands up! 922 01:11:59,524 --> 01:12:01,526 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just relax, all right? 923 01:12:01,609 --> 01:12:03,129 - Sh, sh! - Just relax, relax. 924 01:12:03,153 --> 01:12:04,821 Get the keys - What? 925 01:12:04,904 --> 01:12:06,132 Okay, okay! 926 01:12:06,156 --> 01:12:07,991 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. 927 01:12:08,074 --> 01:12:09,784 All right, all right 928 01:12:12,162 --> 01:12:14,664 We're gonna go for a little drive, okay? 929 01:12:16,458 --> 01:12:17,625 Okay, all right 930 01:12:41,316 --> 01:12:42,543 All right, stop here 931 01:12:45,779 --> 01:12:46,863 Where are we? 932 01:12:48,031 --> 01:12:49,032 Huh? 933 01:12:49,115 --> 01:12:50,241 Where are we? 934 01:12:51,284 --> 01:12:52,535 That's your brother's house! 935 01:12:52,619 --> 01:12:54,204 Or his fortress. 936 01:12:54,996 --> 01:12:56,873 Don't pretend like you don't know where we are! 937 01:12:56,956 --> 01:12:58,208 I don't know, all right? 938 01:12:58,291 --> 01:13:00,543 We're, you know, we're estranged. 939 01:13:00,627 --> 01:13:03,254 Ah, shit, man, that sucks - Thanks. 940 01:13:03,338 --> 01:13:05,215 - Shut up! - Okay. 941 01:13:05,298 --> 01:13:07,884 You, you go inside, 942 01:13:07,967 --> 01:13:10,595 you make nice with your uncle, you get me the monkey. 943 01:13:10,678 --> 01:13:12,639 - And you bring it out, okay? - What monkey? 944 01:13:15,558 --> 01:13:17,394 It's It's got a little red vest, 945 01:13:17,477 --> 01:13:19,270 and it holds a drum, and I need it. 946 01:13:19,354 --> 01:13:21,314 Why does this guy know about a monkey and I don't? 947 01:13:21,398 --> 01:13:23,209 He doesn't know about it and he's not going in there. 948 01:13:23,233 --> 01:13:24,234 It's a toy monkey? 949 01:13:24,317 --> 01:13:26,277 Don't call it that, all right? 950 01:13:26,361 --> 01:13:27,612 It's not It's. 951 01:13:27,695 --> 01:13:28,696 It's evil. 952 01:13:29,322 --> 01:13:30,824 It's basically the devil, all right? 953 01:13:30,907 --> 01:13:32,158 It's a toy monkey 954 01:13:32,242 --> 01:13:34,369 I was gonna tell you when you were older, okay? 955 01:13:34,452 --> 01:13:36,830 You've been a goddamn deadbeat dad because of a toy monkey? 956 01:13:36,913 --> 01:13:38,331 What the fuck? 957 01:13:38,415 --> 01:13:40,495 Hey, language, and yes, but that's why we have to get 958 01:13:40,542 --> 01:13:42,142 as far away from this place as possible. 959 01:13:42,210 --> 01:13:44,546 Seriously, kid, you gotta hope you get that goddamn monkey, 960 01:13:44,629 --> 01:13:46,047 because I'm gonna shoot this guy. 961 01:13:46,131 --> 01:13:48,633 All right, just let me go in there with him. 962 01:13:48,716 --> 01:13:49,884 Please - No! 963 01:13:51,302 --> 01:13:53,471 There is a doggy door around back, 964 01:13:53,555 --> 01:13:55,807 and your kid better hope that he's scrawny enough to fit. 965 01:13:56,516 --> 01:13:58,351 You don't call the cops or do anything. 966 01:13:58,435 --> 01:14:00,270 You get in there, you get me the monkey, 967 01:14:00,854 --> 01:14:03,148 or I swear I'm gonna shoot you both, like, a lot of times. 968 01:14:03,231 --> 01:14:04,524 He's not going in there. 969 01:14:04,607 --> 01:14:06,693 - Shut up! - All right. 970 01:14:06,776 --> 01:14:07,777 Go. 971 01:14:08,987 --> 01:14:10,238 Hal 972 01:14:10,321 --> 01:14:12,115 this is some fucked up shit. 973 01:14:12,699 --> 01:14:13,700 I know. 974 01:14:16,161 --> 01:14:17,537 So whatever you do, 975 01:14:17,620 --> 01:14:19,539 don't turn the key in the monkey's back 976 01:14:23,001 --> 01:14:24,377 Okay, okay! 977 01:14:47,025 --> 01:14:48,193 Fuck 978 01:15:24,187 --> 01:15:25,188 Fuck. 979 01:15:42,747 --> 01:15:43,748 Huh. 980 01:15:45,166 --> 01:15:47,460 Kinda cool I guess 981 01:16:17,407 --> 01:16:18,908 You're not really a cop, are you? 982 01:16:19,993 --> 01:16:21,786 Shut up! Of course not. 983 01:16:22,620 --> 01:16:23,871 I hate cops. 984 01:16:24,706 --> 01:16:26,040 My dad was a cop. 985 01:16:27,250 --> 01:16:29,252 Still is, for all I know. 986 01:16:30,003 --> 01:16:31,843 You know, my mum said he was out chasing pussy, 987 01:16:31,921 --> 01:16:33,899 but I'm all like, there's pussy here in town, you know? 988 01:16:33,923 --> 01:16:35,483 Yeah, I know - But whatever. 989 01:16:35,758 --> 01:16:36,759 He left. 990 01:16:37,385 --> 01:16:38,678 And that's why I hate cops. 991 01:16:39,220 --> 01:16:40,406 But also they're cops, you know? 992 01:16:40,430 --> 01:16:42,140 Which is the best reason to hate cops. 993 01:16:42,223 --> 01:16:43,308 What the fuck? 994 01:16:46,227 --> 01:16:47,562 Uh. 995 01:16:51,065 --> 01:16:53,484 What the hell is that doing there? 996 01:16:55,320 --> 01:16:56,696 Hit it with your brights. 997 01:16:57,488 --> 01:16:59,657 Hit it with my brights, okay 998 01:17:01,576 --> 01:17:03,453 Oh, gross! Shut it off! 999 01:17:03,536 --> 01:17:04,829 - Okay! - Shut it off! 1000 01:17:04,912 --> 01:17:06,331 I'm shutting it off Jesus! 1001 01:17:06,831 --> 01:17:08,058 In your infinite wisdom, 1002 01:17:08,082 --> 01:17:09,762 I trust your flaming sword of righteousness 1003 01:17:10,418 --> 01:17:14,547 will cut the foul air and strike the right person 1004 01:17:14,631 --> 01:17:17,759 and only the right person. 1005 01:17:17,842 --> 01:17:19,052 Uncle Bill? 1006 01:17:21,846 --> 01:17:22,847 Petey. 1007 01:17:24,140 --> 01:17:25,391 What a nice surprise. 1008 01:17:26,768 --> 01:17:28,394 - You okay? - Who, me? 1009 01:17:29,187 --> 01:17:30,188 Yeah. 1010 01:17:30,980 --> 01:17:31,981 You. 1011 01:17:33,650 --> 01:17:35,902 It's been a long time since anyone's asked me that. 1012 01:17:37,654 --> 01:17:39,197 Now that you mention it. 1013 01:17:40,823 --> 01:17:41,824 No. 1014 01:17:43,242 --> 01:17:44,369 I'm not okay 1015 01:17:50,375 --> 01:17:52,293 This was my favourite toy from childhood. 1016 01:17:54,587 --> 01:17:56,964 It's supposed to play the drums, but I think it's stuck. 1017 01:17:59,342 --> 01:18:00,760 Could you fix it for me? 1018 01:18:05,682 --> 01:18:07,183 It was your grandfather's, you know. 1019 01:18:08,017 --> 01:18:09,977 He brought it home from one of his trips. 1020 01:18:10,895 --> 01:18:11,938 He was a pilot. 1021 01:18:12,814 --> 01:18:14,023 He was a Petey too. 1022 01:18:15,900 --> 01:18:17,068 Did you know that? 1023 01:18:17,860 --> 01:18:20,238 - Hal never tells me anything. - No, of course, he doesn't. 1024 01:18:21,572 --> 01:18:23,199 So this is it then, huh? 1025 01:18:24,158 --> 01:18:25,576 The thing that messed everyone up? 1026 01:18:26,327 --> 01:18:27,412 How could it? 1027 01:18:29,163 --> 01:18:30,331 It's just a toy. 1028 01:18:32,166 --> 01:18:33,876 Why don't you try turning it, hmm? 1029 01:18:35,628 --> 01:18:37,148 Probably just needs a different touch. 1030 01:18:39,173 --> 01:18:40,174 There. 1031 01:18:40,967 --> 01:18:43,594 Turning the key is just simply something 1032 01:18:43,678 --> 01:18:46,806 the Shelborn men have been doing for generations. 1033 01:18:46,889 --> 01:18:49,684 It's a A tradition, if you will. 1034 01:18:51,936 --> 01:18:55,773 But if it's not for you, then it's not for you. 1035 01:18:58,609 --> 01:18:59,861 What does it do? 1036 01:19:01,112 --> 01:19:02,280 Turn the key. 1037 01:19:03,322 --> 01:19:04,824 See what happens 1038 01:19:54,999 --> 01:19:56,250 You want me to back up? 1039 01:19:56,334 --> 01:19:57,960 No! Don't fucking move. 1040 01:19:58,044 --> 01:19:59,295 Hey, okay Okay. 1041 01:19:59,962 --> 01:20:01,130 Is it working? 1042 01:20:07,970 --> 01:20:09,639 Man, this stupid cop hat! 1043 01:20:10,264 --> 01:20:11,390 It's crazy itchy. 1044 01:20:12,183 --> 01:20:13,351 What? 1045 01:20:15,895 --> 01:20:17,396 Jesus fucking Christ! 1046 01:20:20,566 --> 01:20:22,126 Let's be careful with that pistol, huh? 1047 01:20:23,402 --> 01:20:24,403 Yeah. 1048 01:20:25,196 --> 01:20:26,614 Totally - Yeah Right. 1049 01:20:26,697 --> 01:20:27,698 Fuck 1050 01:20:51,931 --> 01:20:53,057 Uh 1051 01:21:03,526 --> 01:21:04,902 Holy shit! 1052 01:21:07,697 --> 01:21:09,240 - Shit! Shit! - Oh! 1053 01:21:11,450 --> 01:21:12,827 Jesus Christ! Fuck! 1054 01:21:12,910 --> 01:21:14,579 Fuck! Jesus! 1055 01:21:24,630 --> 01:21:25,631 Fuck! 1056 01:21:32,513 --> 01:21:33,639 What the fuck?! 1057 01:21:38,644 --> 01:21:39,854 Fuck 1058 01:21:46,110 --> 01:21:47,403 - Dad! - Petey! 1059 01:21:47,987 --> 01:21:48,988 Turn it again. 1060 01:21:49,071 --> 01:21:50,448 Turn the goddamn key right now! 1061 01:21:50,531 --> 01:21:51,532 What? No! 1062 01:21:52,241 --> 01:21:54,327 Then give me the fucking monkey! 1063 01:21:56,078 --> 01:21:57,079 That's it! 1064 01:21:57,163 --> 01:21:58,831 I'm not asking nicely anymore. 1065 01:21:58,915 --> 01:22:00,583 Do it Kill him. 1066 01:22:00,666 --> 01:22:03,294 Kill my dumb shit brother, and do it now! 1067 01:22:05,463 --> 01:22:07,715 God damn you! 1068 01:22:07,798 --> 01:22:10,217 Strike the goddamn drum! 1069 01:22:10,301 --> 01:22:12,470 God-fucking 1070 01:22:12,553 --> 01:22:14,013 I command you! 1071 01:22:15,890 --> 01:22:16,891 Fuck. 1072 01:22:23,564 --> 01:22:25,650 God Will you, please? 1073 01:22:27,652 --> 01:22:29,236 Goddamn it! 1074 01:22:30,404 --> 01:22:31,781 God. 1075 01:22:31,864 --> 01:22:33,783 How are you so goddamn strong? 1076 01:22:43,334 --> 01:22:44,377 Hey! 1077 01:22:44,460 --> 01:22:46,003 Huh? Petey! 1078 01:22:46,087 --> 01:22:47,338 Oh, Jesus Christ! 1079 01:22:47,421 --> 01:22:48,798 Ah, thank God Come on 1080 01:22:50,675 --> 01:22:52,718 God damn it! 1081 01:23:33,300 --> 01:23:34,885 What did I do wrong? 1082 01:23:43,853 --> 01:23:45,563 What is that? 1083 01:24:07,126 --> 01:24:08,836 Jesus Christ! 1084 01:24:11,255 --> 01:24:12,631 Ah! God! 1085 01:24:21,557 --> 01:24:22,641 What the. 1086 01:24:23,142 --> 01:24:24,143 Bill. 1087 01:24:27,271 --> 01:24:29,815 Fuck The drumstick's still up, Petey. 1088 01:24:29,899 --> 01:24:30,900 Hello, dumb shit. 1089 01:24:32,068 --> 01:24:34,268 That's all you can say at a time like this, you fucker?! 1090 01:24:34,320 --> 01:24:35,571 Dumb shit's what you are. 1091 01:24:36,322 --> 01:24:38,157 Fuck You fuck! 1092 01:24:44,622 --> 01:24:45,956 Jesus Christ, Bill. 1093 01:24:48,292 --> 01:24:50,252 You were really trying to kill me, weren't you? 1094 01:24:51,670 --> 01:24:52,880 Of course I was. 1095 01:24:52,963 --> 01:24:54,924 That's what all this carnage was for, huh? 1096 01:24:55,007 --> 01:24:56,258 You could've killed Petey! 1097 01:24:56,342 --> 01:24:57,742 You could've killed my fucking son! 1098 01:24:57,802 --> 01:24:59,136 For what? Why? 1099 01:25:01,347 --> 01:25:02,723 'Cause you killed my mum 1100 01:25:12,608 --> 01:25:14,360 And I know you wanted to kill me. 1101 01:25:16,278 --> 01:25:19,031 But the goddamn thing doesn't take requests, obviously 1102 01:25:24,245 --> 01:25:27,414 I've been turning the key with you in mind for days. 1103 01:25:28,165 --> 01:25:29,166 Nothing 1104 01:25:38,676 --> 01:25:39,802 Listen, Bill. 1105 01:25:43,055 --> 01:25:44,265 It's not my fault. 1106 01:25:47,101 --> 01:25:48,853 It wasn't anybody's fault. 1107 01:25:51,063 --> 01:25:53,190 None of us deserved what happened to us. 1108 01:25:55,442 --> 01:25:57,403 We just happened to be there when it did. 1109 01:25:59,113 --> 01:26:00,114 Mummy? 1110 01:26:04,994 --> 01:26:06,203 I'm sorry, Bill 1111 01:26:09,123 --> 01:26:11,208 But I guess I gotta go now. 1112 01:26:12,084 --> 01:26:14,795 Everybody dies, and that's life. 1113 01:26:19,341 --> 01:26:20,801 I'm sorry your mum died. 1114 01:26:23,512 --> 01:26:24,763 It fucking sucks. 1115 01:26:26,849 --> 01:26:28,184 I know how you feel. 1116 01:26:30,978 --> 01:26:32,479 She was my mum, too. 1117 01:26:36,609 --> 01:26:37,735 Oh, yeah 1118 01:26:40,279 --> 01:26:41,488 I guess she was. 1119 01:26:43,908 --> 01:26:45,576 Never thought about it like that. 1120 01:26:48,078 --> 01:26:49,955 Innocent mistake, I guess. 1121 01:26:50,039 --> 01:26:51,081 Sure. 1122 01:26:51,749 --> 01:26:53,167 Makes sense, though, you know. 1123 01:26:54,668 --> 01:26:56,170 We're brothers. 1124 01:26:57,755 --> 01:26:58,797 Twins. 1125 01:26:58,881 --> 01:26:59,882 Right. 1126 01:27:05,262 --> 01:27:06,347 I'm sorry. 1127 01:27:10,059 --> 01:27:12,228 I wish we could have been there for each other 1128 01:27:12,311 --> 01:27:13,437 when we were kids. 1129 01:27:15,564 --> 01:27:16,732 But we're here now. 1130 01:27:19,818 --> 01:27:21,070 What do you say, Bill? 1131 01:27:23,280 --> 01:27:24,365 Brothers again? 1132 01:27:29,995 --> 01:27:30,996 Sure 1133 01:27:37,795 --> 01:27:38,879 Nah 1134 01:27:47,388 --> 01:27:48,430 I'm sorry 1135 01:27:58,941 --> 01:28:01,735 So what, you two are on some kind of road trip or something? 1136 01:28:02,403 --> 01:28:03,529 Yeah. 1137 01:28:04,405 --> 01:28:05,406 A kind of 1138 01:28:06,031 --> 01:28:07,950 father-son road trip, right? 1139 01:28:09,576 --> 01:28:10,577 Cool. 1140 01:28:11,453 --> 01:28:12,955 I would like to have done that 1141 01:28:14,456 --> 01:28:15,874 with somebody at least once. 1142 01:28:16,542 --> 01:28:17,751 So come with us 1143 01:28:29,888 --> 01:28:30,889 Jesus! 1144 01:28:44,611 --> 01:28:45,738 Fuck 1145 01:29:12,681 --> 01:29:14,016 So Uncle Bill pretty much 1146 01:29:14,099 --> 01:29:16,268 wiped out half the town where you grew up, huh? 1147 01:29:18,479 --> 01:29:19,521 Yeah 1148 01:29:23,859 --> 01:29:25,903 I mean, I get that everybody dies, 1149 01:29:25,986 --> 01:29:27,613 and that's life, but 1150 01:29:27,696 --> 01:29:29,531 it's just, like, everybody dies, 1151 01:29:29,615 --> 01:29:31,200 you know, at the same time 1152 01:29:37,790 --> 01:29:38,791 So, uh 1153 01:29:39,833 --> 01:29:41,543 what do you want to do now? 1154 01:29:43,712 --> 01:29:46,799 I guess we gotta figure out what we're gonna do with the monkey. 1155 01:29:49,134 --> 01:29:50,427 We keep it close. 1156 01:29:51,845 --> 01:29:53,555 We accept that it's ours 1157 01:29:54,973 --> 01:29:56,392 and we hold on tight 1158 01:30:47,484 --> 01:30:49,644 Hey, I just got an idea of what we should do right now. 1159 01:30:52,656 --> 01:30:54,032 Let's go dancing. 1160 01:30:55,534 --> 01:30:56,994 - Dancing? - Yeah 1161 01:30:57,077 --> 01:30:59,121 Like, with our bodies? 1162 01:30:59,204 --> 01:31:00,404 Where did that shit come from? 1163 01:31:03,333 --> 01:31:04,668 It comes from your grandmother. 1164 01:31:06,253 --> 01:31:07,421 From Lois 1165 01:31:13,927 --> 01:31:14,928 Cool. 1166 01:31:17,139 --> 01:31:18,432 Yeah, it is cool 1167 01:37:57,038 --> 01:37:58,707 Shit, man, that sucks