Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:08,125 --> 00:00:10,083
♪ Who put the
glad in gladiator ♪
2
00:00:10,166 --> 00:00:11,875
♪ Hercules ♪
3
00:00:11,959 --> 00:00:14,083
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theatre ♪
4
00:00:14,166 --> 00:00:16,041
♪ Hercules ♪
5
00:00:16,125 --> 00:00:17,125
♪ Is he bold ♪
6
00:00:17,208 --> 00:00:18,250
♪ No one braver ♪
7
00:00:18,333 --> 00:00:19,417
♪ Is he sweet ♪
8
00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:21,291
♪ Our favorite flavor Hercules ♪
9
00:00:21,875 --> 00:00:23,333
♪ What a guy ♪
10
00:00:23,959 --> 00:00:25,208
♪ Ask his friends ♪
11
00:00:25,667 --> 00:00:26,834
♪ Honey they won't lie ♪
12
00:00:26,917 --> 00:00:28,917
♪ Oh Hercules ♪
13
00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,208
♪ Hercules ♪
14
00:00:32,625 --> 00:00:33,542
♪ No one's fool ♪
15
00:00:33,625 --> 00:00:34,834
♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
16
00:00:34,917 --> 00:00:36,583
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
17
00:00:36,667 --> 00:00:37,667
♪ Smart and shy ♪
18
00:00:37,709 --> 00:00:39,125
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
19
00:00:39,208 --> 00:00:41,583
♪ No complainin' ♪
20
00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:42,810
♪ He was a no one a zero zero ♪
21
00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:44,709
♪ He'll never quit
till he's a hero ♪
22
00:00:44,792 --> 00:00:48,208
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
23
00:00:48,291 --> 00:00:50,125
♪ From zero to hero ♪
24
00:00:50,208 --> 00:00:52,041
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
25
00:00:52,417 --> 00:00:54,458
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
26
00:00:57,667 --> 00:00:59,250
Wait and see.
27
00:01:05,458 --> 00:01:07,083
The underworld...
28
00:01:07,166 --> 00:01:09,959
Domain of Hades,
Lord of the Dead.
29
00:01:10,041 --> 00:01:12,959
A place of bleak,
unrelieved misery
30
00:01:13,041 --> 00:01:15,125
for all who dwell there.
31
00:01:15,208 --> 00:01:17,041
I love it here!
32
00:01:17,125 --> 00:01:19,041
[I Well, for most
who dwell there.
33
00:01:19,125 --> 00:01:21,917
This is the bestest place ever!
34
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,750
Okay, for some who dwell there.
35
00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:28,250
If evil is in your future,
there's nothing like...
36
00:01:28,333 --> 00:01:30,834
a career in the underworld.
37
00:01:30,917 --> 00:01:32,333
Bravo!
38
00:01:32,417 --> 00:01:33,834
Bravissimo!
39
00:01:33,917 --> 00:01:37,083
Oh, yeah! Class all the way!
40
00:01:38,250 --> 00:01:40,083
Exactly. Couldn't have
said it better myself.
41
00:01:40,166 --> 00:01:42,000
So, hey. Let's make a deal.
42
00:01:42,083 --> 00:01:43,917
You just sign here
on the dotted line
43
00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:46,417
and you are officially
the newest member of...
44
00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,208
Team Hades!
45
00:01:48,291 --> 00:01:50,333
Take your time. Got all day.
46
00:01:50,417 --> 00:01:53,000
Just let's make an "x"
or something. Come on.
47
00:01:53,083 --> 00:01:55,959
Lastragon not know.
48
00:01:56,041 --> 00:01:59,166
Me still have to consider
offer from Poseidon.
49
00:01:59,250 --> 00:02:00,875
Poseidon?!
50
00:02:00,959 --> 00:02:03,208
What, you wanna
get paid in kelp?
51
00:02:03,291 --> 00:02:05,542
Work for me and enjoy
some real perks, okay?
52
00:02:06,709 --> 00:02:09,125
You'll get to torture the
dead, torture the undead...
53
00:02:09,208 --> 00:02:12,125
Not to mention a 15%
discount at the commissary.
54
00:02:12,208 --> 00:02:14,250
And by the way, try
the Apple Brown Betty.
55
00:02:14,333 --> 00:02:16,834
Delish. So good.
56
00:02:16,917 --> 00:02:19,959
And best of all, you'll
get to attack my enemies.
57
00:02:20,041 --> 00:02:24,250
Top-drawer, a-one
enemies like... Hercules!
58
00:02:24,333 --> 00:02:28,208
Herc... one side! One side!
This is an emergency, curse you.
59
00:02:28,291 --> 00:02:29,959
Icarus, what's the matter?
60
00:02:30,041 --> 00:02:32,709
Which of these tuxes do
you like on me for the prom?
61
00:02:32,792 --> 00:02:33,792
Be brutal.
62
00:02:33,875 --> 00:02:36,917
Uh, well... You're
right. Both too tame.
63
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:38,959
Cassandra deserves better.
64
00:02:39,041 --> 00:02:40,917
Cassandra said
she'd go with you?
65
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,125
Well, not in so many words.
66
00:02:43,208 --> 00:02:45,709
What words did she use?
67
00:02:45,792 --> 00:02:47,917
Well, I think it was
"somethin' somethin' somethin',
68
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,417
not in this lifetime, somethin'
somethin' somethin'."
69
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,041
But I'm still in there pluggin'.
70
00:02:52,125 --> 00:02:53,917
No more Geek City for me!
71
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,792
"Geek City"?
72
00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:57,291
Yeah. You know how they talk.
73
00:02:57,375 --> 00:03:00,333
"Icarus doesn't have
a date for the prom!
74
00:03:00,458 --> 00:03:02,917
"Last name Sir,
first name Lou...
75
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,709
He's Mr. Lou Sir."
76
00:03:05,792 --> 00:03:07,272
Well, that's not
happening this year!
77
00:03:08,291 --> 00:03:09,309
So, who are you going with?
78
00:03:09,333 --> 00:03:11,834
Uh... um... I'm
going with, uh...
79
00:03:11,917 --> 00:03:14,917
Yeah, yeah. Gotta go.
Sweet rejection awaits.
80
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,000
Oh, pumpkin?
81
00:03:16,083 --> 00:03:19,000
I got somethin'
to ask you again!
82
00:03:19,083 --> 00:03:22,041
Leave me alone!
83
00:03:23,625 --> 00:03:26,834
Hey, uh, hey,
Tempest. How are you?
84
00:03:26,917 --> 00:03:31,125
Sublime. I got an alpha-plus in
metal shop for my broadsword.
85
00:03:31,208 --> 00:03:33,208
It's called "The Widowmaker."
86
00:03:33,291 --> 00:03:35,917
Hey, you know, uh,
speaking of broadswords...
87
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:37,142
You know the prom's tomorrow?
88
00:03:37,166 --> 00:03:39,583
You mean the annual
exercise in idiocy?
89
00:03:39,667 --> 00:03:41,375
Ha ha ha. Yeah.
90
00:03:41,458 --> 00:03:44,208
I-I had this crazy idea
91
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:48,166
t-that maybe you and I
might, um, want to, uh...
92
00:03:48,250 --> 00:03:52,208
I mean, you know,
ehhh... Go together.
93
00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:56,458
An amazon has no need
for overrated social rituals!
94
00:03:56,542 --> 00:03:59,959
If I don't get a date for
that overrated social ritual,
95
00:04:00,041 --> 00:04:02,291
I'm gonna be
completely humiliated.
96
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:03,959
Humiliated?
97
00:04:04,041 --> 00:04:07,000
A warrior doesn't know
the meaning of the word.
98
00:04:07,083 --> 00:04:09,291
Yeah, I know, but... No!!
99
00:04:11,208 --> 00:04:12,834
Is this stuff yours?
100
00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:13,792
"Tiber Beat"?
101
00:04:13,875 --> 00:04:15,417
"Greek Teen Scene"?
102
00:04:15,500 --> 00:04:18,041
"Win a dream date with Orpheus"?
103
00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:19,667
Orpheus!
104
00:04:19,750 --> 00:04:21,333
Yes, Orpheus.
105
00:04:21,417 --> 00:04:24,750
Golden-throated minstrel
whose heavenly voice
106
00:04:24,834 --> 00:04:27,083
could melt even the
most vicious of hearts.
107
00:04:27,166 --> 00:04:29,750
A singer of
unsurpassed artistry.
108
00:04:29,834 --> 00:04:31,500
A star of unrivalled...
109
00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:32,663
Okay. We get the gist, Bob.
110
00:04:32,709 --> 00:04:34,542
Can we get back
to the story here?
111
00:04:34,625 --> 00:04:36,542
Yes. Of course.
112
00:04:36,625 --> 00:04:38,709
Just where did you get
113
00:04:38,792 --> 00:04:40,667
all these glamour shots
of Orpheus, anyway?
114
00:04:40,750 --> 00:04:44,291
Well, I found them.
115
00:04:44,375 --> 00:04:49,000
All right. Now you know
my secret. I love Orpheus.
116
00:04:49,083 --> 00:04:51,625
I can't get enough
of that dreamboat.
117
00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:53,417
It is my greatest shame.
118
00:04:53,500 --> 00:04:55,166
If I were ever
found out, I'd be...
119
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,333
- humiliated?
- Yes.
120
00:04:57,417 --> 00:05:01,000
So now you see why I
need a date for the prom.
121
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:04,166
- Yes.
- So, then, maybe you'll...
122
00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:06,291
Not in this lifetime!
123
00:05:06,375 --> 00:05:09,417
Herc, you'll just have
to forget about Tempest.
124
00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:14,000
How can I? She's my
only hope to go to the prom.
125
00:05:14,083 --> 00:05:15,083
Oh, pish posh.
126
00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:17,542
There must be plenty of
girls who don't have a date.
127
00:05:17,625 --> 00:05:20,583
I bet Tempest would go to the
prom if that Orpheus guy was playing.
128
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:23,208
Why would Orpheus play
a stupid high-school prom?
129
00:05:23,291 --> 00:05:25,375
I don't know. Couldn't
hurt to ask him.
130
00:05:25,458 --> 00:05:27,875
Dream on, Herc. The day
Orpheus plays our prom
131
00:05:27,959 --> 00:05:30,250
is the day I slow dance
with Ignats over here.
132
00:05:30,333 --> 00:05:32,625
Aah! Yes!
133
00:05:32,709 --> 00:05:34,959
She said yes!
134
00:05:35,041 --> 00:05:36,083
I did not.
135
00:05:36,166 --> 00:05:37,875
Let the world know
136
00:05:37,959 --> 00:05:41,500
that Cassandra will slow
dance with me tomorrow night
137
00:05:41,583 --> 00:05:46,500
because Hercules is
bringing Orpheus to the prom!
138
00:05:46,583 --> 00:05:47,709
I didn't say that!
139
00:05:47,792 --> 00:05:50,375
All I said was Orpheus...
140
00:05:50,458 --> 00:05:55,375
is going to play the
prom tomorrow night!
141
00:05:55,458 --> 00:05:58,834
I guarantee it.
142
00:05:58,917 --> 00:06:03,750
Egads! It's a sad day when the
youth of Athens worship a mere singer
143
00:06:03,834 --> 00:06:05,250
rather than a warrior.
144
00:06:05,333 --> 00:06:08,208
You get Orpheus, and I
will be there on your arm!
145
00:06:09,667 --> 00:06:13,625
Don't get him, and
I'll cut off your arm.
146
00:06:13,709 --> 00:06:16,208
Fair enough.
147
00:06:19,667 --> 00:06:22,875
In... section... 11.
148
00:06:22,959 --> 00:06:28,351
I sense some hesitation.
149
00:06:28,375 --> 00:06:31,834
Come on, we got profit-sharing
bonuses, annual cost-of-dying raises...
150
00:06:31,917 --> 00:06:33,375
What do you want?
151
00:06:33,458 --> 00:06:35,959
Thinkin', uh... oh!
152
00:06:36,041 --> 00:06:38,667
Me want Orpheus!
153
00:06:38,750 --> 00:06:40,667
Hey, you want
Orpheus, you got it.
154
00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:43,750
I'll get you two of 'em.
Now... what's an Orpheus?
155
00:06:43,834 --> 00:06:47,750
Oh! Orpheus' likes? Fun people.
156
00:06:47,834 --> 00:06:51,000
Orpheus' pet
peeve? Unfun people.
157
00:06:51,083 --> 00:06:52,333
Let me see that!
158
00:06:52,417 --> 00:06:56,208
Oy. Teen Idol. Oy, oy, oy.
159
00:06:56,333 --> 00:07:00,083
You mean this Orpheus? Orpheus!
160
00:07:00,166 --> 00:07:02,375
My pal, Orphy. Oh, my.
161
00:07:02,458 --> 00:07:05,583
We're tight. He'll be
here, no problemo.
162
00:07:05,834 --> 00:07:07,959
Me get Orpheus!
163
00:07:08,041 --> 00:07:09,917
Me happy now!
164
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,041
Me happy, too. Oy.
165
00:07:12,125 --> 00:07:13,750
What is wrong with me?
166
00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:16,250
I'll never get Orpheus
to come to the prom.
167
00:07:16,333 --> 00:07:19,333
Hey, buck up. Look
what it says here.
168
00:07:19,417 --> 00:07:23,083
"Orpheus loves his fans and
likes to help worthy causes."
169
00:07:23,166 --> 00:07:26,041
See? He sounds like
a down-to-earth guy.
170
00:07:32,458 --> 00:07:34,166
That's him!
171
00:07:34,250 --> 00:07:36,875
- That's him?
- Here's our chance.
172
00:07:36,959 --> 00:07:40,375
Mr. Orpheus?
173
00:07:40,583 --> 00:07:43,041
Who are you?
174
00:07:43,125 --> 00:07:46,041
Mr. Orpheus, I'm a student
with my... and my prom is tonight,
175
00:07:46,125 --> 00:07:48,125
and I promised you'd come to it.
176
00:07:48,208 --> 00:07:50,834
Or I'll be Mr. Lou
Sir... Oh, yeah.
177
00:07:50,917 --> 00:07:54,291
A-a-and I'm the son of Zeus,
so could you please come
178
00:07:54,375 --> 00:07:55,959
if you're free or something?
179
00:07:56,041 --> 00:07:57,875
Um, no.
180
00:07:57,959 --> 00:08:00,417
Oh, ah. Hey!
181
00:08:02,166 --> 00:08:04,000
So, how'd it go?
182
00:08:07,083 --> 00:08:10,291
Don't get him... and
I'll cut off your arm.
183
00:08:10,375 --> 00:08:14,208
So long, buddy. Have fun
in Tempest's trophy case.
184
00:08:14,291 --> 00:08:16,959
Oh, come on now, soldier.
185
00:08:17,041 --> 00:08:19,875
You'll keep that mighty
limb. There is no fail.
186
00:08:19,959 --> 00:08:22,000
Be a man! Be strong!
187
00:08:22,083 --> 00:08:24,083
Be tough!
188
00:08:24,166 --> 00:08:28,000
Because I wanna
dance with Cassandra!
189
00:08:30,041 --> 00:08:32,208
And so, they didn't give up.
190
00:08:32,291 --> 00:08:34,792
Instead, they forged
on in their quest
191
00:08:34,875 --> 00:08:37,959
to speak to the great
one... Mr. Orpheus?
192
00:08:40,125 --> 00:08:44,500
To succeed where
countless others have failed.
193
00:08:46,208 --> 00:08:49,083
Myself, I scored
a backstage pass
194
00:08:49,166 --> 00:08:50,875
and got to party in the pit!
195
00:08:50,959 --> 00:08:53,000
Ooh, you go, Bob!
196
00:08:53,083 --> 00:08:55,417
- Aah!
- Aah!
197
00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:03,458
Mr. Orpheus, please listen.
198
00:09:03,542 --> 00:09:05,182
This is a matter of
social life and death.
199
00:09:05,625 --> 00:09:07,041
Please, just hear me out.
200
00:09:07,125 --> 00:09:08,375
I think I said "no."
201
00:09:08,458 --> 00:09:09,834
If you don't play my prom,
202
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:12,166
I'll never be able to show
my face at school again!
203
00:09:12,250 --> 00:09:14,208
Yeah, not to mention his arm!
204
00:09:14,291 --> 00:09:16,166
That's your problem, isn't it?
205
00:09:16,250 --> 00:09:19,250
Oh, yeah? Well,
now it's your problem!
206
00:09:19,333 --> 00:09:21,041
Get 'em!
207
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:23,375
I wouldn't! I've got a
stringed instrument,
208
00:09:23,458 --> 00:09:25,166
and I'm not afraid to use it!
209
00:09:25,250 --> 00:09:26,625
Who are you?
210
00:09:26,875 --> 00:09:28,417
Ah! Who am I?!
211
00:09:28,500 --> 00:09:32,125
No, who are you,
huh?! Who are you?!!
212
00:09:32,208 --> 00:09:35,458
That young man came
here with a simple wish.
213
00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:37,375
And do you listen to him?
214
00:09:37,458 --> 00:09:43,083
No! You just grunt and
play your stupid glockenspiel.
215
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:44,750
Uh, Icarus, it's a Lyre.
216
00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,000
No, that's a liar!
217
00:09:46,083 --> 00:09:49,458
A big, fat,
forget-the-fans-who-made-him
218
00:09:49,542 --> 00:09:50,875
kind of liar!
219
00:09:50,959 --> 00:09:52,750
You sing about
the youth of today,
220
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:54,750
but what do you
really know about it?
221
00:09:54,834 --> 00:09:58,834
Don't answer, because
we all know it's bupkis!
222
00:09:58,917 --> 00:10:02,959
I'm glad you're not
playin' our little prom.
223
00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:05,041
And you wanna know why?
224
00:10:05,125 --> 00:10:06,625
Because you're not worthy of it.
225
00:10:06,709 --> 00:10:10,959
Good day, sir. I said good day.
226
00:10:11,041 --> 00:10:13,500
- What was that?!
- Reverse psychology.
227
00:10:13,583 --> 00:10:15,750
- Wait.
- Huh? See.
228
00:10:15,834 --> 00:10:18,333
You, like... like, sort of...
229
00:10:18,417 --> 00:10:19,917
I know, we finally
got through to you
230
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:21,417
and showed you the error
231
00:10:21,500 --> 00:10:24,083
of your cynically
pampered, pop-star ways.
232
00:10:24,166 --> 00:10:25,166
Yeah.
233
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,000
You're getting through to him?
234
00:10:27,083 --> 00:10:29,125
Well, I can read
between the "likes."
235
00:10:29,375 --> 00:10:31,333
Operation room service.
236
00:10:31,417 --> 00:10:32,291
Ready?
237
00:10:32,375 --> 00:10:34,166
Hee hee. Ready.
238
00:10:34,250 --> 00:10:35,834
Hoo-hoo!
239
00:10:35,917 --> 00:10:41,333
I can't believe Orpheus is really
gonna play our prom tonight!
240
00:10:41,417 --> 00:10:43,625
Aaaah!
241
00:10:43,709 --> 00:10:46,834
He's booked to play a what?
242
00:10:46,917 --> 00:10:48,333
A prom.
243
00:10:48,417 --> 00:10:49,792
It's a social function
244
00:10:49,875 --> 00:10:50,935
where everyone dresses up and...
245
00:10:50,959 --> 00:10:55,834
I know what a
prom is, thank you!
246
00:10:55,917 --> 00:10:58,166
Now, where is this prom?
247
00:10:58,250 --> 00:10:59,834
You're not gonna like it.
248
00:10:59,917 --> 00:11:02,041
Heh heh. Try me.
249
00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:06,667
Told you.
250
00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:08,709
I can't believe this!
251
00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:11,166
The best young minion
since the Minotaur
252
00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:12,625
is ready to sign with me,
253
00:11:12,709 --> 00:11:17,750
and the deal clincher is
playing a prom for Jerkules?
254
00:11:17,834 --> 00:11:20,750
Lastragon hear hubbub.
255
00:11:20,834 --> 00:11:22,333
No, that's excitement.
256
00:11:22,417 --> 00:11:24,917
Because last, babe...
May I call you last?
257
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,417
Here is the hottest
ticket in town.
258
00:11:27,583 --> 00:11:29,166
Oh, wait. Something's missing.
259
00:11:29,250 --> 00:11:32,000
Boom. 5 drachma
service charge, nice, boom.
260
00:11:32,083 --> 00:11:34,125
Here you go, babe.
Enjoy the show.
261
00:11:34,208 --> 00:11:35,709
Hee hee hee hoo!
262
00:11:35,792 --> 00:11:37,917
Me have floor seats!
263
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,333
Me so happy!
264
00:11:40,458 --> 00:11:42,542
Well, Orpheus doesn't know it,
265
00:11:42,625 --> 00:11:45,959
but he's about to
start a long, long...
266
00:11:46,041 --> 00:11:47,959
underworld tour.
267
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:50,333
Get out your tuxes, boys.
268
00:11:50,417 --> 00:11:52,125
We're goin' to the prom.
269
00:11:57,083 --> 00:11:59,041
It's prom night at the academy.
270
00:11:59,125 --> 00:12:01,792
And everywhere,
starry-eyed students await
271
00:12:01,917 --> 00:12:04,750
the happiest evening
of their young lives.
272
00:12:04,834 --> 00:12:06,667
Just kill me now.
273
00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:08,667
Now you can do better
than that, Casserole.
274
00:12:08,959 --> 00:12:10,542
Give your old dad a smile.
275
00:12:10,792 --> 00:12:13,583
I am smiling.
276
00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:20,709
Check it out, check it out.
277
00:12:20,792 --> 00:12:23,917
Icarus gettin' a
"kissarus." Check it out.
278
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:25,875
So, mon chéri.
279
00:12:25,959 --> 00:12:28,583
Wanna take me up on
that slow dance now?
280
00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:32,959
I've tipped the guys on the A.V.
Squad to put a spotlight on us.
281
00:12:33,041 --> 00:12:35,875
Listen, I'm only here
because Orpheus lost his mind
282
00:12:35,959 --> 00:12:37,959
and agreed to play
this stupid prom.
283
00:12:38,041 --> 00:12:39,709
But I don't have to like it.
284
00:12:39,792 --> 00:12:43,834
And I won't touch you until I see
him up on that stage singing, got me?!
285
00:12:43,917 --> 00:12:47,625
I think Orpheus will
be, uh... Orpheus? Ha!
286
00:12:48,792 --> 00:12:52,041
Have you seen him yet?
Is he going on soon? Huh?
287
00:12:52,125 --> 00:12:55,625
Ballad. Big hit with
pointless drum solo.
288
00:12:55,709 --> 00:12:57,792
Other big hit...
Mention Athens in it,
289
00:12:57,875 --> 00:13:00,375
hold for applause.
290
00:13:00,458 --> 00:13:01,750
Mortal!
291
00:13:01,834 --> 00:13:06,750
On your knees and bow
before my magnificent evil!
292
00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:09,583
Who are you?
293
00:13:09,667 --> 00:13:11,208
Oy. Why do I even try?
294
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,583
Hades, Lord of the
Dead. How you doin'?
295
00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,667
These are my minions,
Pain and Panic.
296
00:13:15,750 --> 00:13:17,875
They'll be abducting you
to the underworld tonight.
297
00:13:17,959 --> 00:13:21,166
It's him! It's really him!
298
00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:23,667
I'll never wash this claw again.
299
00:13:23,750 --> 00:13:26,000
Please, please be patient.
300
00:13:26,083 --> 00:13:28,250
Mr. Orpheus... Orpheus!
301
00:13:28,333 --> 00:13:30,959
Mr. Orpheus will be
out to play very soon.
302
00:13:31,041 --> 00:13:33,250
Or not.
303
00:13:33,333 --> 00:13:35,375
Uh, what?...?
304
00:13:35,458 --> 00:13:36,625
What happened to Orpheus?
305
00:13:36,709 --> 00:13:39,417
Orpheus has left the building.
306
00:13:40,041 --> 00:13:42,208
That is some kind
of big, smokey head.
307
00:13:42,291 --> 00:13:46,125
Thank you. See, I need song boy
for a little command performance.
308
00:13:46,208 --> 00:13:50,792
And don't wait up because he's
gonna be down here for a one-life stand.
309
00:13:50,875 --> 00:13:52,834
Oh, no!
310
00:13:52,917 --> 00:13:54,875
This is awful!
311
00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:57,166
We've come this
far. I'm not giving up.
312
00:13:57,250 --> 00:13:58,875
Oh, easy for you to say.
313
00:13:58,959 --> 00:14:00,917
You only have to risk your life
314
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,250
and rescue Orpheus
from the underworld.
315
00:14:03,333 --> 00:14:05,625
I have to stall the
crowd till you come back!
316
00:14:05,709 --> 00:14:11,583
We want Orpheus!
We want Orpheus!
317
00:14:12,041 --> 00:14:16,250
Me want Orpheus!
318
00:14:16,333 --> 00:14:18,667
Okay. How y'all doin'
tonight? We havin' fun?
319
00:14:18,750 --> 00:14:19,875
Before we start the show,
320
00:14:19,959 --> 00:14:23,166
we have a very special guest.
He's a giant in the industry.
321
00:14:23,250 --> 00:14:24,750
Hey, he's a giant
in any industry.
322
00:14:24,834 --> 00:14:28,542
Lastragon, stand up!
323
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:33,333
Ok, good. Sit back down, I
wanna tell ya, this is one big kid...
324
00:14:33,417 --> 00:14:34,500
And a snappy dresser, too.
325
00:14:34,583 --> 00:14:35,643
By the way, that reminds me...
326
00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,542
Guy goes to a tailor.
He's got a torn chiton.
327
00:14:37,625 --> 00:14:39,726
He says to the tailor, he says,
"Hey, I got a torn chiton here."
328
00:14:39,750 --> 00:14:40,542
How are you doing?
329
00:14:40,625 --> 00:14:42,875
The tailor says, "Euripides?"
The guy says, "Eumendades?"
330
00:14:44,125 --> 00:14:46,291
I know you're out there
'cause I can hear you rotting.
331
00:14:46,375 --> 00:14:48,709
Hello? "I can hear you rotting."
332
00:14:50,333 --> 00:14:52,709
I can tell better
jokes than that.
333
00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:56,917
But do I ever get
to go on? No-o-o.
334
00:14:57,041 --> 00:14:59,208
I have to push the barge pole,
335
00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:02,500
schlepping a bunch
of saps down the river...
336
00:15:02,583 --> 00:15:04,959
- No offense.
- None taken.
337
00:15:05,041 --> 00:15:07,893
Come on. Just take a look at this
guy, will ya? He's a big fella, isn't he?
338
00:15:07,917 --> 00:15:11,083
Makes The Colossus of
Rhodes look like a lawn jockey!
339
00:15:11,166 --> 00:15:12,500
Lawn jockey.
340
00:15:12,583 --> 00:15:14,375
Hello? These are
the jokes, friends.
341
00:15:14,458 --> 00:15:15,625
Sue me.
342
00:15:15,709 --> 00:15:17,750
Hey! You can't go in there.
343
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,375
It's off-limits.
344
00:15:19,458 --> 00:15:22,917
Um... I'm on the list.
345
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,417
Oh, really?
346
00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:27,500
Well, guess what, smart
guy? There isn't any list!
347
00:15:27,583 --> 00:15:30,542
Oh. Oh, uh, if there's no list,
348
00:15:30,625 --> 00:15:32,083
then how do you
know I'm not on it?
349
00:15:32,166 --> 00:15:33,166
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
350
00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:34,500
He's got you there.
351
00:15:34,583 --> 00:15:36,250
Okay, in you go.
352
00:15:39,667 --> 00:15:41,375
- Hey!
- Hey!
353
00:15:44,083 --> 00:15:45,417
No need to thank me.
354
00:15:45,500 --> 00:15:47,208
I'm only doing what
any hero would do.
355
00:15:47,291 --> 00:15:48,333
And I give you my word
356
00:15:48,417 --> 00:15:50,208
I'll get you back to the
prom safe and sound.
357
00:15:51,250 --> 00:15:52,917
You people look terrific.
358
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,375
Now, I know that everybody's
here to see Orpheus,
359
00:15:55,458 --> 00:15:59,000
so I'll just do a couple
dozen more of my own tunes.
360
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:00,166
Oh!
361
00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,875
I think this is the way out.
362
00:16:02,959 --> 00:16:05,291
Because I... I...
363
00:16:05,375 --> 00:16:09,125
Oh, I've passed this
same ribcage three times.
364
00:16:09,208 --> 00:16:12,000
Aaah! What's the use?
365
00:16:12,083 --> 00:16:13,959
I can't do anything right.
366
00:16:14,041 --> 00:16:17,500
I make a fool of myself,
then I mess up your life
367
00:16:17,583 --> 00:16:21,166
and get us both stuck here
forever in the underworld.
368
00:16:21,250 --> 00:16:22,375
And for what?
369
00:16:22,458 --> 00:16:24,583
To be popular in high school.
370
00:16:26,208 --> 00:16:27,375
I've done worse.
371
00:16:27,458 --> 00:16:28,542
You have?
372
00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:30,750
Yeah. I mean, I was
gifted with a voice
373
00:16:30,834 --> 00:16:32,875
that could calm a
savage beast, you know,
374
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,834
but now I am that beast.
375
00:16:34,917 --> 00:16:36,583
Well, not a "beast"
beast, you know,
376
00:16:36,667 --> 00:16:38,750
but a money-making monster.
377
00:16:38,834 --> 00:16:40,709
It's all a horrendous waste.
378
00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:43,125
That's why I barely
speak at all anymore.
379
00:16:43,208 --> 00:16:47,667
You sacrificed your integrity
just so you could be popular?
380
00:16:47,750 --> 00:16:49,250
Somethin' like that, yeah.
381
00:16:49,333 --> 00:16:51,875
Well, you're talkin' now.
382
00:16:51,959 --> 00:16:54,125
Right. Heh. I am!
383
00:16:54,208 --> 00:16:57,375
And man, it feels good to
be using sentences again!
384
00:16:57,458 --> 00:16:58,375
Thanks, Hercules!
385
00:16:58,458 --> 00:17:01,184
No problem, but we really should
try to find a way out of here you know?
386
00:17:01,208 --> 00:17:03,291
No way, mate. I owe you.
387
00:17:03,375 --> 00:17:06,667
You have saved me... from me.
388
00:17:07,667 --> 00:17:11,083
But can he save you from... me?
389
00:17:11,166 --> 00:17:14,333
Hercules and Orpheus,
come on down!
390
00:17:14,417 --> 00:17:16,333
Whoa-a-a-a!
391
00:17:16,417 --> 00:17:18,417
Aaah! Oooh!
392
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:27,834
Me want Orpheus!
Me want Orpheus!
393
00:17:27,917 --> 00:17:30,834
All right, all right,
keep your loincloth on.
394
00:17:30,917 --> 00:17:34,709
Well, Mr. No-Show, I hope
you're up to performing.
395
00:17:34,792 --> 00:17:36,417
The crowd's full of deadheads,
396
00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:38,959
but hey, you'll be one
of them in a few. Ha!
397
00:17:39,041 --> 00:17:41,083
Hey, next time you're
trying to sneak away,
398
00:17:41,166 --> 00:17:43,375
you might try holding the
"Ya-na-na ya-na-na na"
399
00:17:43,458 --> 00:17:45,041
till you're topside.
What do you think?
400
00:17:45,125 --> 00:17:47,583
Enjoy the show, Jerkules.
401
00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:49,750
'Cause it's gonna
be the last thing
402
00:17:49,834 --> 00:17:51,250
you're ever gonna see.
403
00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:54,834
That's just what
I'm going to do.
404
00:17:54,917 --> 00:17:57,083
Are you ready to rock?
405
00:17:59,291 --> 00:18:02,125
Are you ready for Orpheus?
406
00:18:02,208 --> 00:18:04,041
Orpheus!
407
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:06,917
Are you ready to run? All right!
408
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:10,583
I got a genuine piece
of Orpheus clothing.
409
00:18:10,667 --> 00:18:11,709
You want it?
410
00:18:11,792 --> 00:18:12,625
Yeah!
411
00:18:12,709 --> 00:18:13,875
Come and get it!
412
00:18:13,959 --> 00:18:17,792
Orpheus!!
413
00:18:17,875 --> 00:18:19,375
Orpheus!
414
00:18:23,959 --> 00:18:27,625
I've got a prom to get to.
415
00:18:27,709 --> 00:18:30,583
Well, you've been a
wonderful audience.
416
00:18:30,667 --> 00:18:34,000
And now I'm going to
go do my unplugged set.
417
00:18:34,083 --> 00:18:35,667
Could somebody unplug me?
418
00:18:35,750 --> 00:18:37,333
Where is Orpheus?
419
00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:40,834
Orpheus... is... here!
420
00:18:40,917 --> 00:18:43,834
Hello, Athens!
421
00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:45,750
Are you ready to rock?
422
00:18:45,834 --> 00:18:47,834
Aaah! He's here!
423
00:18:47,917 --> 00:18:50,083
I love you so much!
424
00:18:50,166 --> 00:18:54,709
Kill all!
425
00:18:54,792 --> 00:18:58,667
No 2-ton titan ruins my
special moment with Orpheus!
426
00:18:58,750 --> 00:19:00,917
Meet The Widowmaker!
427
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,875
Aah!
428
00:19:07,542 --> 00:19:09,709
Thank you. Thank you very much.
429
00:19:12,083 --> 00:19:15,125
Go get 'em, boy. There's the
kid who stole your Orpheus.
430
00:19:16,125 --> 00:19:18,000
Hi there.
431
00:19:18,083 --> 00:19:21,709
I think somehow we
got off on the wrong foot.
432
00:19:21,792 --> 00:19:23,542
Aah!
433
00:19:25,709 --> 00:19:28,625
You sing for Lastragon.
434
00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:31,875
No way. I'm an artist,
not a trained monkey,
435
00:19:31,959 --> 00:19:33,417
you big fat tub of guts.
436
00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:38,041
Oh... me can't help
weight problem.
437
00:19:38,125 --> 00:19:40,309
Whoa-a-a!
438
00:19:40,333 --> 00:19:42,125
Smart move.
Insult the evil giant.
439
00:19:42,208 --> 00:19:43,667
Works every time. Nice.
440
00:19:46,667 --> 00:19:49,834
Finally, this shindig
is starting to perk up.
441
00:19:49,917 --> 00:19:51,834
Hey, Princess. Ready to go home?
442
00:19:51,917 --> 00:19:53,667
No, Dad!
443
00:19:53,750 --> 00:19:56,125
Okay, I'll just be
out in the chariot.
444
00:19:56,208 --> 00:19:57,250
Party on.
445
00:19:57,333 --> 00:19:59,166
If I'd known proms
were this much fun,
446
00:19:59,250 --> 00:20:00,959
I would've gone to mine.
447
00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:07,250
Me... kill... now.
448
00:20:07,333 --> 00:20:09,250
I always knew it
would end like this.
449
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:11,166
Not on your life, sister.
450
00:20:12,250 --> 00:20:14,542
Sound check!
451
00:20:15,542 --> 00:20:16,709
- Huh?
- Huh?
452
00:20:16,792 --> 00:20:20,125
Sing, Orpheus.
Sing like the wind!
453
00:20:20,208 --> 00:20:23,000
Yeah, make your voice
pure again, Orpheus.
454
00:20:23,083 --> 00:20:24,166
You can do it.
455
00:20:24,250 --> 00:20:26,333
Uh... okay.
456
00:20:26,417 --> 00:20:27,875
This is a song I wrote today
457
00:20:27,959 --> 00:20:29,667
on the boat out
of the underworld.
458
00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:32,083
It's about a guy
I really admire.
459
00:20:32,166 --> 00:20:34,125
Maybe he's you, maybe it's...
460
00:20:34,208 --> 00:20:35,309
Now would be a good
time to keep it brief.
461
00:20:35,333 --> 00:20:38,959
♪ He doesn't have
what it takes ♪
462
00:20:39,041 --> 00:20:41,083
♪ But maybe he'll get it ♪
463
00:20:41,166 --> 00:20:44,583
♪ Maybe someday too ♪
464
00:20:44,667 --> 00:20:46,500
- What is going on?
- ♪ Those are the breaks ♪
465
00:20:46,583 --> 00:20:48,917
♪ So why should he sweat it ♪
466
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,750
♪ But try to tell him that ♪
467
00:20:50,834 --> 00:20:52,750
♪ He's got to learn to wait ♪
468
00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:54,333
♪ Till the time is right ♪
469
00:20:54,417 --> 00:20:56,375
♪ He's got to know his heart ♪
470
00:20:56,458 --> 00:20:58,291
♪ Before he starts to fight ♪
471
00:20:58,375 --> 00:21:00,834
Get down! Get... ooh.
472
00:21:00,917 --> 00:21:03,500
This isn't bad. What am I doing?
473
00:21:03,583 --> 00:21:07,417
Come on, you love
you! Crush them!
474
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,500
Drop that thing!
475
00:21:09,583 --> 00:21:10,917
♪ Just give him half a chance ♪
476
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,458
♪ He's gonna do all right ♪
477
00:21:13,542 --> 00:21:17,000
♪ Can anyone do more than that ♪
478
00:21:17,083 --> 00:21:20,583
♪ Yeah maybe he'll
do more than that ♪
479
00:21:20,667 --> 00:21:23,250
♪ If anyone can pull it off ♪
480
00:21:23,333 --> 00:21:26,208
♪ Then Hercules might ♪
481
00:21:28,166 --> 00:21:31,750
I guess you aren't such
an insufferable dolt after all.
482
00:21:31,834 --> 00:21:35,583
Ah, I bet you say that
to all the demigods.
483
00:21:35,667 --> 00:21:37,625
You were very
courageous just now,
484
00:21:37,709 --> 00:21:39,125
risking your life like that.
485
00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:43,959
Well, I wasn't about to
miss out on my slow dance.
486
00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:46,417
Come on, let's get it over with.
487
00:21:51,291 --> 00:21:54,333
You're never gonna let
me forget this, are you?
488
00:21:54,417 --> 00:21:56,000
You got that right, baby.
489
00:21:56,083 --> 00:21:57,500
Ugh!
490
00:21:58,792 --> 00:22:00,917
Thanks again for
helping me out, Orpheus.
491
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:04,208
I should be thanking you
for setting my head straight.
492
00:22:04,291 --> 00:22:07,750
No more selling out.
Just me and my voice.
493
00:22:07,834 --> 00:22:09,834
And your roadie.
494
00:22:09,917 --> 00:22:12,333
Lastragon put this in Sparta.
495
00:22:12,417 --> 00:22:13,583
He's learning.
496
00:22:13,667 --> 00:22:16,208
♪ If anyone pull off ♪
497
00:22:16,291 --> 00:22:18,375
♪ Hercules might ♪
35124
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof