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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,401 --> 00:00:02,434 - Hello, dears. 2 00:00:02,436 --> 00:00:04,069 - Hey, marie. - Hey. 3 00:00:04,071 --> 00:00:06,405 - Oh, debra, I need my big spoon back. 4 00:00:06,407 --> 00:00:08,040 I'm making cakes. 5 00:00:08,042 --> 00:00:09,408 - Oh, sure. For the bake sale? 6 00:00:09,410 --> 00:00:11,310 - For the bake sale? 7 00:00:11,312 --> 00:00:15,614 Let's be honest. My cakes are the bake sale. 8 00:00:15,616 --> 00:00:17,449 - I'm making cupcakes this year. 9 00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:23,088 - Oh, I think that's sweet you're trying to help. 10 00:00:23,090 --> 00:00:25,090 I wouldn't make too many. 11 00:00:27,293 --> 00:00:28,360 Okay, that's it. 12 00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,429 I just needed my big spoon. 13 00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:32,631 Thanks. Back to baking. 14 00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,099 Oh, and I'm gonna send your father over. 15 00:00:34,101 --> 00:00:35,300 Okay, good-bye. 16 00:00:35,302 --> 00:00:37,302 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - What? 17 00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:39,204 Why is he coming over here? 18 00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:42,041 Because I have to concentrate, and I can't have him there. 19 00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:43,742 - Well, I don't want him here. 20 00:00:43,744 --> 00:00:47,780 Yesterday, he was showing the kids how to burp out a candle. 21 00:00:47,782 --> 00:00:49,181 - That's why I want him out. 22 00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:50,416 I'm working with food. 23 00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:53,786 It's a matter of public health. 24 00:00:53,788 --> 00:00:55,788 Oh, please. 25 00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:58,624 I do a lot of babysitting for you. 26 00:00:58,626 --> 00:01:02,261 - Yeah, but our kids don't curse as much. 27 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:10,235 - Ally, why don't you go to the park with grandpa? 28 00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:12,805 - No, thanks. 29 00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:16,575 - Raymond, why don't you take him 30 00:01:16,577 --> 00:01:18,444 To one of your sports games? 31 00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:21,780 - I'm not taking him to any of my sports games, okay? 32 00:01:21,782 --> 00:01:23,182 Besides, the only football around 33 00:01:23,184 --> 00:01:24,183 Is hofstra and northeastern. 34 00:01:24,185 --> 00:01:25,851 They're both 0-7. 35 00:01:25,853 --> 00:01:29,221 It's like watchin' the kids have a tickle fight. 36 00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,457 - Well, your father already has his outside pants on, 37 00:01:31,459 --> 00:01:33,125 So I'm sending him over. 38 00:01:33,127 --> 00:01:35,327 - No! Come on, ma. 39 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:37,362 - Hey, hey. What's shakin', everybody? 40 00:01:37,364 --> 00:01:38,831 - Hey. Hey, robert. 41 00:01:38,833 --> 00:01:40,599 Who do you like in the big game today? 42 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:42,167 - What big game? 43 00:01:42,169 --> 00:01:44,770 - Hofstra and northeastern. Where ya been? 44 00:01:44,772 --> 00:01:47,206 Tss... Huh? 45 00:01:50,710 --> 00:01:54,279 - What's with that? 46 00:01:57,517 --> 00:01:59,551 - I really haven't been following hofstra. 47 00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:01,386 - What, are you kidding me? This is their year. 48 00:02:01,388 --> 00:02:02,721 And northeastern? 49 00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:05,524 It's like clash of the titans today. 50 00:02:05,526 --> 00:02:06,658 - Yeah? 51 00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:08,460 - You want to go or not? 52 00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:11,330 - Really? 53 00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,865 - He doesn't want to go. 54 00:02:12,867 --> 00:02:14,600 - No, no, no. I'll go. I'll go. I want to go. 55 00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:17,269 - All right. Good. 56 00:02:17,271 --> 00:02:19,838 - Okay, great. Go get dad and go. 57 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:22,541 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait. 58 00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:23,809 Me and dad? 59 00:02:23,811 --> 00:02:25,277 - That's right, dear. 60 00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:28,213 There's gonna be a big tickle fight. 61 00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:34,219 - All right, you know what? 62 00:02:34,221 --> 00:02:35,687 If you want to beat the traffic, you better get goin'. 63 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,422 - Well, what? You're not comin'? 64 00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:39,825 - I wish. I wish. I can't catch a break. 65 00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:43,662 I got to work on the frickin' bake sale all day. 66 00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:44,730 Witchy-poo has got me 67 00:02:44,732 --> 00:02:49,268 Frosting up the cupcakes all day. 68 00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:52,571 - Ah, the perils of marriage, huh? 69 00:02:52,573 --> 00:02:53,839 That's too bad, raymond. 70 00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:56,208 Well, I'll be thinking about ya. 71 00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:59,778 - I'll be thinking about you. 72 00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:02,214 Sucker! 73 00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:06,919 - Witchy-poo? 74 00:03:06,921 --> 00:03:08,720 - Yeah. That was great. 75 00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:10,289 The face that you made when I said it, 76 00:03:10,291 --> 00:03:11,757 It was perfect, yeah. 77 00:03:11,759 --> 00:03:14,760 Yeah, just like that, yeah. 78 00:03:14,762 --> 00:03:17,496 Okay, you can stop now. 79 00:03:32,946 --> 00:03:35,914 - Go with dad to the game. 80 00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:40,419 Why do you hate me? 81 00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:41,653 - What's on your shirt? 82 00:03:41,655 --> 00:03:44,990 - Nacho cheese. 83 00:03:44,992 --> 00:03:47,926 - My introduction, please. 84 00:03:47,928 --> 00:03:50,362 - You want to see what you did? 85 00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:52,397 - Just introduce me! 86 00:03:57,003 --> 00:04:01,573 - Lynn swann, jerry rice, and now frank barone. 87 00:04:05,545 --> 00:04:07,879 - What, you bought a football? 88 00:04:07,881 --> 00:04:09,715 - No bought-- caught. 89 00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,949 Robert. 90 00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:12,484 - Hey, look, I did your intro, dad. 91 00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:13,986 I'm done. 92 00:04:13,988 --> 00:04:15,721 - Hey, you were a witness to glory. 93 00:04:15,723 --> 00:04:18,557 History demands your testimony. 94 00:04:18,559 --> 00:04:19,992 - What happened? 95 00:04:19,994 --> 00:04:23,695 - Well, first of all, in spite of the hype, 96 00:04:23,697 --> 00:04:28,934 Today's game was not a great matchup. 97 00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:31,003 - Come on, really? 98 00:04:31,005 --> 00:04:33,572 - But at the end, this kid from hofstra 99 00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:35,507 Kicks an unbelievable field goal. 100 00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:37,376 - 68 yards. 101 00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,577 - 68-yard field goal? 102 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:41,446 - Yep, the longest ever, college or pro. 103 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:47,986 Come on, robert, tell it like you're not a gelding. 104 00:04:47,988 --> 00:04:49,788 - Well, we had seats behind the end zone, 105 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,923 And dad got lucky. 106 00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,759 - Luck is the residue of design. 107 00:04:53,761 --> 00:04:55,060 - What? 108 00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:57,462 - Shut up. You should've seen it. 109 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,897 It was a rocket. 110 00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:00,699 I got my hands ready for it. 111 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:03,702 - By dumping his nachos somewhere. 112 00:05:04,737 --> 00:05:06,338 - It came towards me. 113 00:05:06,340 --> 00:05:08,073 Everyone was trying to get their mitts on it, 114 00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:09,841 But I put the moves on all of them. 115 00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:11,977 I jumped over a guy. 116 00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:15,881 - You pushed a kid out of the way. 117 00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:18,083 - I jumped over a guy. 118 00:05:18,085 --> 00:05:19,751 It was coming in high. 119 00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:21,420 I had to stretch for it. 120 00:05:21,422 --> 00:05:24,022 I could get only one hand on it, but that was enough. 121 00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:27,926 I brought that little piggy right down into my chest. 122 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:30,495 Hello, little piggy. 123 00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:36,501 - And then he went, "whee-whee-whee," 124 00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:39,738 All the way home. 125 00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,374 - It was the biggest moment ever in hofstra history, 126 00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:43,842 And I have it. 127 00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:47,579 You should have heard the crowd chanting for me. 128 00:05:47,581 --> 00:05:49,648 - Give it back, jerk! 129 00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:51,917 Give it back, jerk! 130 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:54,519 - And booing. 131 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,821 - Wait, dad, dad. 132 00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:57,889 Hofstra's got to want that ball back. 133 00:05:57,891 --> 00:06:00,392 - You bet your ass they do. 134 00:06:00,394 --> 00:06:02,461 I had to put the razzle-dazzle on a couple of mooks 135 00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:04,629 Just to get out of the stands. 136 00:06:04,631 --> 00:06:07,799 - Frank, that's a record for the school. 137 00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:10,135 You know it's not right to keep that, don't you? 138 00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:11,837 - Don't bother, deb. 139 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:15,040 His soul was removed to make room for more stomach. 140 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,717 - A fan is supposed to do 141 00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,619 What's best for the team. 142 00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:28,720 - That's what's so great about this-- 143 00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:33,024 I'm not a fan. 144 00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:35,927 Those kids stink. 145 00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:39,731 Except for the kicker. Thanks, pal! 146 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,900 - Charming, no? 147 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,702 - Hey, dad, I'd give the ball back. 148 00:06:43,704 --> 00:06:46,438 - Then it's a good thing you didn't catch it. 149 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:48,640 Come on, robert. - Where are we going? 150 00:06:48,642 --> 00:06:51,042 - To the lodge to tell the story. 151 00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:54,012 You go in before me and build me up. 152 00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:58,016 I don't like to toot my own horn. 153 00:06:58,018 --> 00:07:01,686 - No, no, I'm not comfortable with that. 154 00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:03,021 - Oh, yeah? 155 00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:06,691 How was living in my house for 40 years? 156 00:07:06,693 --> 00:07:09,694 Was that comfortable? 157 00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:11,897 - All right. All right. 158 00:07:11,899 --> 00:07:14,466 - I believe you were comfortable eating my food, 159 00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:16,201 Watching my tv, 160 00:07:16,203 --> 00:07:18,069 Wearing the springs out of my furniture 161 00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:20,705 With your two-ton rump. 162 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,677 - All right! 163 00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:36,822 - Raymond? 164 00:07:36,824 --> 00:07:38,824 Taste this. 165 00:07:42,728 --> 00:07:43,728 - Good. 166 00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:45,130 - How good? 167 00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:46,798 How much would you pay for this whole cake 168 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:47,866 At the bake sale? 169 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:50,202 - Uh, $10? 170 00:07:50,204 --> 00:07:52,471 - $10? 171 00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,473 - All right. 172 00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:58,076 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. 173 00:07:58,078 --> 00:07:59,978 $1,000. 174 00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:04,049 - You're such a sweet boy. 175 00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:05,784 - How much would you pay for my cupcakes? 176 00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:08,653 - A million dollars. 177 00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:09,888 - Where's the radio? Where's the radio? 178 00:08:09,890 --> 00:08:11,723 - What, what? What's going on? 179 00:08:11,725 --> 00:08:14,159 - I heard it driving over. They're talking about dad. 180 00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:15,260 - Who is? 181 00:08:15,262 --> 00:08:16,828 - The sports show! 182 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,230 - Oh, no! 183 00:08:18,232 --> 00:08:20,198 - Hey, you want to know what that guy is? 184 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,700 I'll tell ya, he's a jackass. 185 00:08:21,702 --> 00:08:25,770 they are talking about him. 186 00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:27,939 - Oh, man, you should've seen this guy-- 187 00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,975 Bulldozes a kid gettin' the ball. 188 00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:36,081 Then he hightails it out of there with some big goon. 189 00:08:36,083 --> 00:08:39,651 - Hey, he was my ride! 190 00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:40,952 - This is embarrassing. 191 00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:43,088 It never ends with your father. 192 00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,923 - Boy, hot topic. Lines are lit up. 193 00:08:44,925 --> 00:08:46,858 Let's go to frank in lynbrook. 194 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:50,695 - Yeah, this is the jackass. 195 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:53,532 I caught that ball, and anybody who doesn't like it 196 00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:56,101 Can kiss me between the back pockets. 197 00:08:56,103 --> 00:08:58,603 - Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? 198 00:08:58,605 --> 00:08:59,905 - Wait a minute. 199 00:08:59,907 --> 00:09:01,206 You're telling us you're the guy? 200 00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,275 - Damn straight. 201 00:09:03,277 --> 00:09:04,943 - And you're proud of what you did? 202 00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:06,311 - You bet I am! 203 00:09:06,313 --> 00:09:08,079 - So what, you think you deserve the ball? 204 00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:09,281 You're gonna keep it? 205 00:09:09,283 --> 00:09:11,550 - No, I'll give it back... 206 00:09:11,552 --> 00:09:13,752 For ten grand. 207 00:09:13,754 --> 00:09:15,687 - What's wrong with him? What is wrong with him? 208 00:09:15,689 --> 00:09:18,023 - $10,000. 209 00:09:18,025 --> 00:09:20,825 - The bidding starts at $10,000, yes. 210 00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:23,161 - Unbelievable. 211 00:09:23,163 --> 00:09:24,162 - So, dave on line one, what do you think? 212 00:09:24,164 --> 00:09:25,830 - What do I think? 213 00:09:25,832 --> 00:09:29,701 I think this frank deserves to be kicked 68 yards. 214 00:09:29,703 --> 00:09:33,838 - Finally, a voice of reason. 215 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,240 - Frank, you're telling me 216 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:37,042 Ron fernandez doesn't deserve the ball? 217 00:09:37,044 --> 00:09:39,778 - Who the hell is ron fernandez? 218 00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,781 - The player who kicked the field goal. 219 00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:46,651 - Well, his money's as good as anyone else's. 220 00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:49,988 - Why do you let him use the phone? 221 00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,591 - I got an idea-- all you whiners 222 00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:53,858 Who think this kid should have the ball 223 00:09:53,860 --> 00:09:55,226 Can take up a collection 224 00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:58,296 And send it to frank barone, entrepreneur. 225 00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:00,999 - Oh, no. I can't believe he said that! 226 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:04,035 - I know, "entrepreneur." 227 00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:05,870 - No, barone! Barone! 228 00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:07,639 He used our last name! 229 00:10:07,641 --> 00:10:09,808 - This is gonna drive down the price of my cakes. 230 00:10:09,810 --> 00:10:11,242 - Wait a minute. Barone? 231 00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:13,745 Any relation to ray barone, the sportswriter? 232 00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:17,215 - No! No! 233 00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:19,017 - Sure, he's my son. 234 00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:20,285 - Noooooooo! 235 00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:23,722 - Oh, my cake! My cake! 236 00:10:23,724 --> 00:10:25,924 - Did you hear what he said? 237 00:10:25,926 --> 00:10:30,161 How could he say that? 238 00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:31,963 - Oh, that explains it. 239 00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,298 Oh, I hate that guy's column. 240 00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,400 He thinks he's so funny. He blows! 241 00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:36,801 - Hey. 242 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:42,807 - Man, I should be taping this. 243 00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:44,275 - All right, we got to take a quick break. 244 00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:45,710 Frank, we got a whole bunch of callers 245 00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:46,711 Who want to talk to you. 246 00:10:46,713 --> 00:10:48,113 Can you stay with us? 247 00:10:48,115 --> 00:10:49,648 - I'd love to, but I got to hit the head, 248 00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:53,318 And the cord won't reach that far. 249 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,388 - And on that lovely note, we'll be right back. 250 00:11:02,862 --> 00:11:04,362 - Frank? 251 00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:08,366 I made you a snack. 252 00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:12,037 - Thank you. 253 00:11:12,039 --> 00:11:16,007 - Oh, frank, hold the sandwich with two hands like a person. 254 00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:18,276 - I'm all right. 255 00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:30,822 - So, um... 256 00:11:30,824 --> 00:11:33,725 Frank, what do you say we turn off the tv... 257 00:11:33,727 --> 00:11:35,994 Chi-chi? 258 00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:38,096 - What are you doing? 259 00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:39,731 - What do you think I'm doing? 260 00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:41,766 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, you been drinkin'? 261 00:11:41,768 --> 00:11:43,001 - No! 262 00:11:43,003 --> 00:11:44,235 - Hey, what are you doin'? 263 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:45,403 - I'm takin' this ball 264 00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:46,771 Back to hofstra, where it belongs. 265 00:11:46,773 --> 00:11:49,708 - You floozy! 266 00:11:49,710 --> 00:11:50,875 You're not goin' anywhere! 267 00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:52,410 - Oh, yes, I am! 268 00:11:52,412 --> 00:11:55,046 - Just give me that ball back, and nobody gets hurt. 269 00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:56,314 - Now! Now! 270 00:11:56,316 --> 00:12:00,085 - Okay! 271 00:12:00,087 --> 00:12:01,386 Hey, the door is locked! 272 00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:02,821 What did you lock the door for? 273 00:12:02,823 --> 00:12:04,489 Ah! 274 00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:07,826 - Okay! - I'm open, ma! 275 00:12:07,828 --> 00:12:09,394 - Let me go! Let me go! 276 00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:11,996 Let me go, you witches! 277 00:12:16,102 --> 00:12:17,736 - Robert, throw it! 278 00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:20,939 Robert, throw it! 279 00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:41,793 - Sorry! 280 00:12:41,795 --> 00:12:43,495 - Idiot! 281 00:13:04,550 --> 00:13:06,384 - Ha-ha! - Get out of here, dad! 282 00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:10,088 - You should lock your doors. It's a bad neighborhood. 283 00:13:15,427 --> 00:13:17,862 - Hey, deb, I'm really sorry. 284 00:13:17,864 --> 00:13:20,965 - I managed to throw the ball very well. 285 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:26,237 - Well, I thought ray was cuttin' back toward the window. 286 00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:29,407 - A closed window? 287 00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:30,909 - Well, I couldn't tell it was closed. 288 00:13:30,911 --> 00:13:33,912 The glass looked very clean. 289 00:13:33,914 --> 00:13:39,551 - All right, nobody believes you anymore, robert. 290 00:13:39,553 --> 00:13:41,820 - Oh, hey, listen. 291 00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:43,822 I think I got somethin' here that's gonna take care of dad. 292 00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:45,423 - Are those the papers to have him committed? 293 00:13:45,425 --> 00:13:47,091 - Yeah. 294 00:13:47,093 --> 00:13:49,194 Ha-ha, very funny. Okay. 295 00:13:49,196 --> 00:13:50,929 This is my column for tomorrow morning. 296 00:13:50,931 --> 00:13:52,463 You know what? Let me read it to you. 297 00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:54,265 It'll be good to get a perspective from people 298 00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:55,500 Who read my column every day. 299 00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:03,508 Ohh. 300 00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,176 You're kidding me. 301 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,045 You don't read my column? 302 00:14:07,047 --> 00:14:11,382 - It's just that it's always about sports. 303 00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:13,017 - What about you? 304 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:18,623 - I used to read it a lot when we were dating. 305 00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:21,326 - I get the times. 306 00:14:24,597 --> 00:14:27,398 - Just listen! 307 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:30,468 "my father is the reason I became a sportswriter. 308 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:33,071 "growing up, he took me to every game he could, 309 00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:35,440 "teaching me to appreciate the thrill of competition, 310 00:14:35,442 --> 00:14:37,008 "the grace of athletes, 311 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:40,078 "and the wonder of a properly topped hot dog. 312 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:42,647 "but sadly, my father has become a symbol 313 00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:45,216 "of what is wrong with sports today. 314 00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:46,951 "my father is frank barone, 315 00:14:46,953 --> 00:14:50,555 "who is now holding a football for ransom, 316 00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:52,323 "hoping to squeeze out a couple of dollars 317 00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:54,392 "and a few minutes in the limelight. 318 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:55,593 "I see now that my father and I 319 00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:58,129 "no longer share the same idea of sports 320 00:14:58,131 --> 00:15:01,666 "or, for that matter, life. 321 00:15:01,668 --> 00:15:04,369 "and because he'll never apologize, I'll do it. 322 00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:08,106 "sorry, ron fernandez. Sorry, hofstra university. 323 00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:11,209 "sorry, sports fans everywhere. You deserve better. 324 00:15:11,211 --> 00:15:14,445 We all do." 325 00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:15,446 So? 326 00:15:15,448 --> 00:15:16,447 - Wow. 327 00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:17,682 - Not bad. 328 00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:21,152 I should read your stuff more often. 329 00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:23,922 - It's beautifully written and so honest. 330 00:15:23,924 --> 00:15:25,189 - Mm-hmm. 331 00:15:25,191 --> 00:15:27,525 What are you doing? Give me that! 332 00:15:27,527 --> 00:15:29,294 You just said that it was good! 333 00:15:29,296 --> 00:15:31,162 - It's exceptional, but you can't print that. 334 00:15:31,164 --> 00:15:33,197 You don't attack your family in public. 335 00:15:33,199 --> 00:15:34,565 - What are you talking about? 336 00:15:34,567 --> 00:15:36,935 You took a swing at him at the mall last week. 337 00:15:36,937 --> 00:15:38,269 - That's different. 338 00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:41,940 He was doing skits in the lingerie store. 339 00:15:41,942 --> 00:15:43,107 - All right, ma, look. 340 00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:45,176 He has to publish this, all right? 341 00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,945 Dad is a menace, and he's got to be stopped. 342 00:15:46,947 --> 00:15:48,479 - See? 343 00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:53,618 - I'm with you all the way, brother. 344 00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:55,687 - Ray, your mom has a point. 345 00:15:55,689 --> 00:15:58,690 - Oh, my god. 346 00:15:58,692 --> 00:16:01,259 - I mean, I just don't think this is gonna get the ball back. 347 00:16:01,261 --> 00:16:02,593 - What do you want to do, 348 00:16:02,595 --> 00:16:08,566 Draw up another play for fran tarkenton here? 349 00:16:08,568 --> 00:16:09,734 - This is just gonna make frank 350 00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:12,170 Dig his heels in even more. 351 00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,571 - Think of our family, raymond. 352 00:16:13,573 --> 00:16:16,274 It'll only destroy our harmony. 353 00:16:16,276 --> 00:16:19,344 - Harmony? 354 00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:20,578 Are you hearing this? 355 00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:22,714 - Are you? Because she's right. 356 00:16:22,716 --> 00:16:26,985 - What? What happened to this? 357 00:16:26,987 --> 00:16:29,087 - I still got it. 358 00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:34,459 It's just over here now. 359 00:16:34,461 --> 00:16:36,327 - You know what? 360 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:37,695 I don't care what you think, all right? 361 00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:39,530 People have to know that I am not like him. 362 00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:41,399 - Oh, really? 363 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,768 Okay, 'cause I thought this was about getting the ball back, 364 00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:44,769 But if you just want to clear your name, 365 00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,337 Then this will do it. 366 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:47,772 You should definitely publish it, then. 367 00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:51,142 - Don't try and pull that "tell me to do it 368 00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:54,312 So I don't do it" flippity-floo, okay? 369 00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:55,513 I'm gonna do it. 370 00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:56,681 You think this is gonna stop me? 371 00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:58,449 All I need is a piece of tape. 372 00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:00,018 No. I can just print it up again. 373 00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,019 Yeah, that's what I'll do. Yeah. 374 00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,787 Hey, you know what? 375 00:17:02,789 --> 00:17:05,456 I'm gonna make it even stronger. There's stuff that I left out. 376 00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:07,358 That's the power of the press, people. 377 00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:08,793 And don't any of you try to stop me, 378 00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:11,729 Or I'll write somethin' about you. 379 00:17:16,435 --> 00:17:19,203 - What kind of stuff you think he'd write? 380 00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:20,638 - Don't worry about it, robert. 381 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:23,641 - I had a slight bed-wetting problem. 382 00:17:44,297 --> 00:17:46,731 - Hey, dad, you down here? 383 00:17:47,834 --> 00:17:49,467 Hey. 384 00:17:49,469 --> 00:17:51,069 - What do you want? 385 00:17:51,071 --> 00:17:52,737 - Look, I tried a lot of different things 386 00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,338 To get you to do what's right, all right? 387 00:17:54,340 --> 00:17:56,140 I was even gonna publish an article about you, 388 00:17:56,142 --> 00:17:57,442 But some people thought 389 00:17:57,444 --> 00:17:59,577 It would screw up our family harmony. 390 00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:01,779 So I'm gonna try somethin' else. 391 00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:03,181 - Family harmony? 392 00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,649 - Yeah, I don't know. 393 00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:09,821 All right, guys, come on down. 394 00:18:09,823 --> 00:18:11,756 Come on. Come on down. It's okay. 395 00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:15,193 - What the hell is this? 396 00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:16,861 - This is ron fernandez, dad. 397 00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:18,296 - Who? 398 00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:20,798 - The guy who kicked the ball, dad. 399 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,300 And this is his father. 400 00:18:22,302 --> 00:18:26,137 - Oh, jeezaloo, what are you doin'? 401 00:18:26,139 --> 00:18:27,205 - Go ahead. 402 00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:29,640 - Uh, well, uh... 403 00:18:29,642 --> 00:18:31,242 Mr. Barone, 404 00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:33,644 That was really impressive the way you, uh... 405 00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:36,881 Caught that ball. 406 00:18:36,883 --> 00:18:38,716 I think that was a really great catch. 407 00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:43,387 - You are a real piece of work. 408 00:18:43,389 --> 00:18:47,558 - We can't afford 10,000, mr. Barone. 409 00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:51,129 I can pay you 500. 410 00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:55,633 Please. I want it for my son. 411 00:19:15,921 --> 00:19:20,558 - Captain huggles? 412 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,627 - Keep your money. I don't want your money. 413 00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:25,496 God forbid I should make a buck. 414 00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:27,732 But let me tell you somethin'. 415 00:19:27,734 --> 00:19:29,800 I know what this ball is worth, 416 00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:31,869 So I better not see you sellin' it. 417 00:19:31,871 --> 00:19:34,438 - No, sir. 418 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:38,242 - I'm surprised you don't have them holding a puppy. 419 00:19:42,481 --> 00:19:45,850 Here. 420 00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:47,818 - Thank you. 421 00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:53,224 This is for you, dad. 422 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:54,659 - What? 423 00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:56,794 No, it's yours. You should have it. 424 00:19:56,796 --> 00:20:01,265 - No. You're the one who got me started, dad. 425 00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:04,468 I kicked it for you. 426 00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,204 Go on. 427 00:20:15,314 --> 00:20:16,347 - Okay? 428 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,221 - Thank you, mr. Barone. 429 00:20:23,223 --> 00:20:25,456 You are a gentleman. 430 00:20:34,967 --> 00:20:36,000 - You see that? 431 00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:37,635 - Yeah. 432 00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:41,839 - You see how nice that kid was to his father? 433 00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:51,782 You owe me ten grand! 434 00:21:00,460 --> 00:21:01,993 - If the knicks are ever gonna compete with the lakers, 435 00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:03,995 They need to be bigger up front. 436 00:21:03,997 --> 00:21:05,830 Let's see what you all have to say. 437 00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:06,998 Robert from lynbrook. 438 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:10,034 - Uh, yeah. Hey, gary. 439 00:21:10,036 --> 00:21:16,340 Longtime listener, first-time caller. 440 00:21:16,342 --> 00:21:19,043 I just want to say I heard that frank barone 441 00:21:19,045 --> 00:21:20,478 Gave that ball back, 442 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:21,679 And I think he showed 443 00:21:21,681 --> 00:21:26,550 The true spirit of american harmony. 444 00:21:26,552 --> 00:21:27,551 - Well, thank you, robert. 445 00:21:27,553 --> 00:21:28,886 I happen to agree with you, 446 00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:30,288 But we were talking about the knicks. 447 00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:32,423 - Absolutely. One more thing... 448 00:21:32,425 --> 00:21:38,029 I liked when the guy said, "ray barone blows." 449 00:21:38,031 --> 00:21:42,066 Let's hear more from him. 450 00:21:42,068 --> 00:21:44,535 Ray barone. 451 00:21:47,639 --> 00:21:50,341 - Laugh it up, pee-pee pants. 31187

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