All language subtitles for The Great North s04e04 Ready Mayor Won Adventure.eng

-? Look up there ?
-? What do you see? ?

? Nature and stuff ?

-? Like a rock ?
-? And a tree ?

? Oh, the Great North ?

? Way up here,
you can breathe the air ?

? Catch some fish ?

? Or gaze at a bear ?

? Wow ?

? Oh, the Great North ?

? Here we live, oh, oh ?

? Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ?

? From longest night
to longest day ?

? In the Great North. ?

[cheering]

This is Diondra Tundra,
live at City Hall,

where we are moments away
from finding out

who will serve as interim mayor

while Mayor Peppers
undergoes a reverse vasectomy.

While he's
getting his junk back,

we're getting a town hall snack.

They're talking about you, babe.

Well, now, let's not jinx it.

While write-in votes
are yet to be counted,

according to exit polls,

Councilperson Roy
and Council Eagle Toby

are neck and feathered neck
with Wolf Tobin,

seen here in
his official campaign photo.

Babe, I think you really are
going to frang the dang thing.

Well, don't count out
those write-in votes just yet.

Lone Moosers love a write-in.

They get their head
turned pretty easily.

Indeed. Last time
Mayor Peppers was out,

everyone wrote in Mrs. Laramie
just because she'd given out

full-sized candy bars
for Halloween the previous fall.

Well, now she's
been dead for five years.

So I just might frang this.

? Let's frang the dang thing ?

-[cheering]
-? Let's frang it ?

? Let's frang the dang thing ?

Mr. and Mrs. Michelle Obama?

Of course, I'd love to
start a podcast together

-on how we've all shaped
America. -? Frang the dang thing. ?

Whoo! I can't wait to give
the town of Lone Moose

a full-sized bar
called my heart.

So, does Lone Moose always elect
a short-term mayor

when the regular mayor
takes a sick day?

Only when anesthesia
is involved.

Otherwise, Lone Moose
officials pride themselves

on unnecessarily
powering through illnesses.

Our last mayor
passed a kidney stone

while reading to first graders
at the library.

If You Give a Moose a Muffin

gets pretty existential
when screamed.

Jerry, would you like any more
boneless barbecue bacon bites?

Oh, no, thanks, I'm full.

Uh, did I tell you
they were free?

You did, like a dozen times.

Jerry, these guys are
very weird about free stuff.

-They can't resist it.
-This is Alaska.

If someone offers you
anything for free,

you take it
and you run like hell.

-Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
-That's true.

This is it. They're announcing
the final results.

With all the votes counted,
Wolf Tobin does have the lead...

Woo-hoo!

...among official candidates.

But the actual winner
is a write-in.

Wolf Tobin was hoping
to take home a win tonight,

but Honeybee Shaw-Tobin
beat him to it.

Wait, I won? Wolf, I'm-I'm...

Yeah, oh...

it's all right, I... uh...
[sobbing]

Aw, babe, You know I'd never win
against you on purpose.

Unless it was some kind of
fun casino scheme

where we split
the profits after.

You know,
uh, maybe I'll just have

a little drink to, uh,
celebrate.

Uh, but I should probably
open this campaign champagne

outside so I don't risk injuring
our new interim mayor.

It's not a big deal
that you didn't win, Wolf.

You're better than this.

Having a hot wife that everyone
likes much, much more than you

is no reason to be jealous.

Yeah, what's important is
that you tried your best

and instead it went someone
who didn't try at all.

Why isn't this
making me feel better?

Aah! Susan Sarandon's
brother Brandon, that hurt.

[sighs]

Okay, I'm gonna go back
in there and be supportive.

It's like
the Rolling Stones say,

"You can't always get what you
want, but your wife can.

And that's okay, too, because
maybe she'll have leftovers."

Did somebody say Lone Moose
has a sexy new mayor

with a strong,
supportive husband?

So, you're not upset
about losing?

I was for a second,
but now I'm 100% behind you

and ready to hitch my wagon
to your caboose.

-Toot-toot!
-Well, okay, then.

Because now that it's sunk in,
I'm pretty excited.

I've always wanted a chance to
have some real responsibility.

At the curtain store,
it felt like Dad would never

let me in on the big decisions
like which new styles to order.

Or how long to let a customer
stay in the bathroom

before giving a concerned knock.

Well, here's your first
decision as mayor:

would you like a hooray hug
or a congratulations kiss?

Ooh, both.

See, I'm gonna be great at this.

And I'm going to be great
at standing right beside you

every step of the way.

It'll almost be like
I'm mayor, too.

Yeah, but I'm actually
the mayor.

[laughs] Of course, of course.

Honeybee Shaw-Tobin,
with the power vested in me,

I hereby appoint you
Interim Mayor.

Oh, you're done. I assumed
there'd be like a ball,

with like a live orchestra,
and maybe Elsa's there

and she freezes the town,
and then Hans-

Ah, you're in a Frozen spiral,
sweetie.

-Right, right.
-You do get to wear the sash.

Sorry, there's a little mustard
stain on it from the last guy.

I should be fully recovered
by 8:00 a.m. tomorrow,

and then I'll be ready...

[groggy]
to be your next American Idol.

Oh-oh! Sorry, the medication
might be kicking in a little.

Don't worry, Mayor Peppers,
Lone Moose is in great hands.

Here's your coffee,
my governmental goddess.

They didn't have any milk,

so I used a little dollop
of sour cream.

Oh, and I did have to use
a stapler as a stir stick

and one staple did get in,
but I fished it right out.

Oh, you're... staying?

Yeah. I figured, since
I did all that research

on Lone Moose for my campaign,

I might as well keep my brain
right here for you to pick.

Oh, okay, that's fine.

I bet even Beyonc� brings Jay-Z
to work sometimes

in case she needs someone

to get her a new mouse pad
or something.

Oh, you're going to sit
right here?

Right over my shoulder? Okay.

Like a little guardian angel.
Or a very erotic parrot.

-Terrific.
-Ca-caw, ca-caw!

Polly wants some politics.

Good morning, Interim Mayor
Honeybee and regular Wolf.

Good morning,
Councilperson Gwen, Stephanie.

Tell me everything I need
to know about interim mayoring.

You can use
the private bathroom,

you can print anything you want
all day,

and some people like to bang
the gavel in the meeting room.

Oh, you brought your computer.

Oh, yes, but don't mind me,

just taking some notes.

"Honeybee bang gavel,
comma, go potty."

Wait, so that's all I do today?

I don't make any decisions?

You can decide
where we order lunch from.

But don't leave leftovers
in the fridge.

That's my pet peeve.

Ready to go bang the gavel?

-[sighs] I guess.
-[Vera] Ding ding!

Ding ding!

Why did you take away
the counter bell?

Uh-oh, Vera's here
with her daily complaints.

We took away the bell
because she just rings it

and rings it when
the mayor won't see her.

Now she just yells
till she falls asleep,

and then we put her in her car.

Huh. Well, send her in.

Are you sure?
She's terrible.

I can handle it.
I'm the mayor.

That's what I'm here for.

[Vera]
Ding ding! Ding ding!

Hello, new idiot.

I'd like to move my fence

-five feet back and-
-Done!

Wait, really?

Okay, I just need you
to sign this.

Oh, uh, actually-

Only five feet, right?

That's like the five-second
rule, but with distances.

Just a moment,
my nubile notary-

Oh, do I not have
the power to do this?

Well, you do, actually.

But there's actually
a whole process

for re-fencing in Lone Moose,

and I do recommend we follow it

because just to the northwest-

Uh, we can circle back to this
riveting geography lesson later.

-It's a yes.
-Thanks.

I'm glad I voted for you
as a joke.

That was awesome.

I feel so energized
and powerful,

like a Lady Cocaine Bear.

So, you don't just want
to spend the day

looking for giant scissors
and asking if we have nukes?

I definitely will do
both of those things,

but I'm here to help, too.

Okay, in that case,

I have a small proposal
I'd love to run by you.

There are no small proposals,
just small mayors.

Which, to be clear,
is different than short kings,

who I love and respect.

See, Lone Moose has had
a noise curfew of 8:00 p.m.

since the 1800s,
originally put in place

when the home harpsichord
was invented,

and it's really a bummer
for the karaoke night I host.

Oh, Stephanie, no.

Mm-hmm. If I can't sing
the entire soundtrack

to Broadway's Liam Neeson's
Taken: The Musical

at my own party,
is this even America?

Not to me.
Where's that bill?

Now, Honeybee, I don't want
to Wolf-splain this to you,

but in a small Alaskan town,

even the tiniest decisions
can be a big deal.

You would not believe
the brouhaha that erupted

when the city council let
two different coffee shops

call themselves Brew-Ha-Ha's.

Well, thank you for your input,
constituent Wolf,

but I am capable
of making decisions.

I'm sorry, my Sonia Sexy-mayor.

It's just that I did do a lot
of preparation for this job.

Right, but now it's my job.

And we're talking about
fences and music here,

not world peace.

Bam! Now, Stephanie,
send out an email blast

letting people know
I'll be holding

mayoral office hours
for the rest of the day.

Oh, and add the fun GIF
where a dog keeps barking

-at a poster of Reba.
-[Wolf laughs]

Now, that's gonna get
some heinies in hallways.

Speaking of which, I'm thinking
I move this chair back around

and then we'll each put
one butt cheek on yours?

Or, uh, if you have
other errands

to do or something, I'm good.

Nope, I'm free as a turd.

[barks]

If it's not too much trouble...

-Well, actually, babe-
-Approved.

-Now, hon, if it were me-
-I'm gonna say yes, Dorothy.

You make a girl want
to start paying her taxes again.

? ?

[Maude]
Well,

if it isn't
Lone Moose's first family.

Congratulations on being related
to the interim mayor.

Thank you.
It's an honor

to have someone in the family

be recognized by the town.

Mom got recognized a lot,

but mostly for pretending
to be a mermaid

off the docks when
she drank too much Zima.

You know,
I'd love to get a picture

of Mayor Honeybee
up on the wall today.

-What's in it for us?
-Well...

HAM:
I didn't think I'd be hungry,

but special treatment
really works up an appetite.

I'll admit getting
free pies from Maude's

was an unexpected
and appreciated indulgence.

But let's not let
this go to our heads.

Hey, Tobins.
Got some new samples in.

Don't suppose you'd like
to take them for a spin?

Maybe Honeybee sees
something she likes

and pops down for a picture
I can throw on our website?

Well, it'd be rude
not to at least look.

[Honeybee] Wow, it's only 2:00,
and I've already made

more decisions in one day
than I made

in all the time
I worked at the curtain shop.

Is there a level above girlboss?

You know, maybe this afternoon
you and I sit here

and carefully go over every
decision you've made thus far.

See if there's any
you want to un-decide.

Actually, Wolf,
you know, I was thinking

maybe you could work at home
for the rest of the day.

-Oh.
-'Cause I've been noodling

on a very special project
for you.

Lone Moose has
a lot of small town charm,

but are we maximizing it?

-Great question.
-I want you to take this phone book...

Uh-oh, someone just got a PhB.

...and call everyone in town

and ask them if they have
any quirky skills

that we can put on
the Lone Moose tourism website.

Oh, this idea absolutely cranks.

Great. And I'll stay here and,
you know, be the mayor.

Which I was elected to be.
While you're more

behind the scenes.
At home.

Oh, hell yes.

You'll be like
Kamala Harris and I'm, uh...

I want to say Gary?

-Doug.
-And I'll be Doug.

Well, we're just hours into
the Honeybee administration,

and the town
is positively buzzing.

She's talking
directly to the people

and she's saying yes
to easing their distress.

Just ask Dorothy Tuntley.

Honeybee rescinded
the skinny-dipping ban.

Now if I want to hit
the lake on my property

in what God granted,

it's between me and the super
hot owl in my pine tree.

There you have it.

If you've got a worry,
come see the mayor in a hurry.

Picture this: Fresh air,
the night sky.

And getting absolutely hammered.

I'm talking permitted
outdoor alcohol consumption.

Mm, I don't know.
Moose-hunting within town limits

seems kind of dangerous.

Moose are the dangerous ones.

I found one in my den
going through my DVDs.

It ate my copy of
Michael Douglas's The Game.

[gasps]
That bastard.

Approved.

-[phone rings]
-Go for Mayor Honeybee.

This is the First Husband.

What you doing?

I'm at work, which you know

because it's where
you called me.

[laughs]
So true.

Uh, thought you might want to
hear how the project is going.

Spoiler: I finished.
Ha! Got a lot of good quirks.

For instance,
did you know that Daniel Strunk

has a beaver cemetery
in his backyard?

He's laid hundreds of
our flat-tailed friends to rest.

Oh, amazing.
Just, uh, email it all over.

Actually, if I leave now,

I can head on in
and get caught up

on everything that's
happened since I left.

Oh, uh, hold on,
someone's talking to me.

What's that? Mayor-mergency?

Sorry, babe, got to go.

Oh, ha.

That's a busy little Honeybee.

But this Wolfy worker bee
is just as busy.

Uh, uh...
Oh, I know.

Busy making
a romantic as all heck dinner,

to celebrate the end
of Honeybee's mayoral term.

Now, where are the pizza rolls?

I can't believe
I've wasted my life

wearing wool socks when I could
be wearing the full sheep.

My feet are sweating,

which normally
would make them cold,

but then these boots
just warm them up again.

This confusing sensation
is certainly worth

a few moments
of Honeybee's time.

Yoo-hoo, Tobins.

Y'all look so important.

Well, we're having a special
on free makeovers

for people who are on their way
to see Mayor Honeybee.

[Honeybee sighs]

Well, gals, I guess
that's all she wrote, literally.

Okay, let me just get
Wolf's leftovers for you

since he forgot them here,
which is weird... [laughs]

since there's a sign
on the fridge

and I did issue
a verbal warning-

[trumpet blowing]

Oh, did you guys get me
a singing congrats-o-gram?

Hear ye, hear ye.

I, Jeremy Reuben,
the duly elected town crier

of Whippleton hereby
notify you that Whippleton

formally declares war
against Lone Moose.

Wait, Whippleton is declaring
war? Gwen, Stephanie?

Can they do that?
Like, actual war?

With fighting and cargo pants
and stuff?

Whereby Lone Moose did
encroach upon Whippleton

by a distance of five feet
upon our border,

which is, according to the
Treaty of 1989,

considered to be an act of war,

war is therefore duly declared.

Thank you for listening.

I'll see you on the battlefield.

Oh, may I use your restroom?

I had two grape Fantas
on the drive over. [chuckles]

You're home, finally.

Ah, the pizza rolls are cold,

but we could, uh, reheat them
if you know what I mean?

I'm kind of in the middle
of some important city business.

Oh, I thought you were handing

the reins back to Mayor Peppers.

W-What's so important
that it can't wait

until after this elegant
retirement feast,

my Delicious-Beth Warren?

Uh, Lone Moose is at war.

Wait, like
Lone Moose Lone Moose?

Yes, and I'm just about
to head to the front.

Where's our emergency stash
of peppermint bark?

I need a peace offering.

Oh, this is about
Vera's fence, huh?

Wait, how did you-

The 1989 land treaty.

I tried to tell you
this morning.

Oh, you tried to tell me?

You did not say anything
about a war.

I mean, I was going to, but...

Look, I'll just head out there
with you

and fix this problem-

No, I don't need my husband
rushing in to save me.

I'm not saving, I'm helping.

I've been trying to help
all day.

I finished the special
assignment.

I just gave you that assignment

to get you off my junk.

-Wait, really?
-Yes.

I didn't ask you to come
to the office with me.

And I also didn't ask you
to correct

every decision I made
like a big jerk.

Well, maybe if you'd
listened to me

questioning all your decisions
like a big jerk,

we wouldn't be at war.

Oh, please, you were just mad

that people like me
better than you.

What? No.

F-Fine. You know what?

All offers to help
are hereby rescinded.

Let's face it. I'm an Elsa
and you're an Olaf at best.

No, wait, everyone loves Olaf.

You're one of the carrots
they feed the reindeer.

Damn it, I'm in
a Frozen spiral again.

By God, I'm glistening.

Dare I say this is the best
free makeover I've ever had.

You dare, and I dare.

You were right, Yolanda.

Contouring is exactly
like frosting a cake.

If you mess up,
you just add another layer.

We'd better get over
to town hall

to get Honeybee to stop by
for her pictures.

She's not responding
to my texts.

Also I cannot see my phone.

All right, y'all,
when you bring her,

I'll set y'all up with
some gorgeous acrylic nails.

I don't know what those are,

and I cannot wait to have them.

Okay, everyone, hi, hi,
nice to meet you.

I'm Honeybee,
Interim Mayor of Lone Moose.

Ooh, peppermint bark.
Can someone hold my retainer?

I stand before you as
Mayoress Shanice Parker-Butts.

You have encroached on our land
with much boldness, sir.

-'Tis war.
-Okay, yes,

first of all, love the outfits.

Listen, we are just
talking about five feet,

and I'm sure Vera wasn't aware

-of the trouble she
was causing when she- -Oh, I knew.

Who do you think called
and told them?

-Vera.
-Deal with it.

Chaos keeps me young.

She called, but you signed

the authorization for her
to move the fence,

Mrs. Interim Mayor.

Mayor Honeybee,
we have a situation.

Which I am dealing with.

Um, yes, hello, everyone.

Mayor Shanice.

But I'm actually not talking
about the war.

Things have gotten a little...
out of control in town.

[clamoring over phone]

Okay, guys, I'll be right back.

-Vera, uh, get them
some coffee, okay? -Never.

[Stephanie] ? My name is Bryan
Mills and I bring home the bacon ?

? I've got a special
set of skills ?

? And my daughter's been taken ?

Okay, uh, I am realizing

that getting rid
of the noise curfew

and allowing hunting in town

may not have been one of
my finest moments.

I guess, uh, tell the crowd
to disperse, Edna.

I'd love to, but no one
is breaking the law.

Even the public drinking
is legal now.

Boy, I really screwed the moose.

But I can handle this.
This town still loves me.

Let me make an announcement

that if everyone goes home
right now,

I will write
on their Facebook wall

when it's their birthday. Aah!

Sorry.
I was aiming for that moose.

-Mrs. Tuntley!
-[moose bellows]

Yoo-hoo, Mr. Owl!

I have eight more songs,
then it's your turn.

Bottomless moonshine, get your
bottomless moonshine.

-What have I done?
-[snare drum playing]

-Oh no.
-Atten-hut.

Acting Mayor
Honeybee Shaw-Tobin?

Unfortunately, yes.

I hereby notify you
that as an ally

of the noble land of Whippleton,

the town of Ted's Folly

formally also declares war
on Lone Moose.

[sighs] Terrific.

What in the world?

Honeybee, we need to take you

to get your nails done.

[Wolf]
Lady Birds Johnson.

I'm so upset I'm even wasting
perfectly good pizza rolls.

[door opens]

[sobbing]

Babe, no, what is it?

The peppermint bark didn't work.

I know you're mad at me,
but-but-but...

Whatever it is,
it's gonna be okay.

-[sobbing]
-Let me get some pizza rolls out of the trash for you.

Well, I'm the worst mayor
Lone Moose has ever had.

That's my final declaration
as mayor.

That I'm the worst.

Oh, sweetie, I wouldn't
be too hard on yourself.

We've had some
pretty bad mayors.

Mayor Hornby ate three
of his constituents.

Now, what's going on?

If I tell you, can you promise

not to say "I told you so"?

Can I silently mouth it?

Wait, no, no, no, no, go ahead.

Well, you know
how Whippleton declared war?

-Yep.
-Well, apparently the treaty says

that if they declare war,
Ted's Folly has to, too.

-Mm-hmm.
-And I accidentally sort of on purpose

made public drinking
and public nudity

and public singing and
hunting moose in town legal,

and I didn't know
people would, you know...

-Take advantage of it?
-Uh-huh.

I've always been good
at being popular,

but I guess that's different
than being powerful.

I just was having fun

being in charge
and making decisions.

'Cause my dad never let me.

So then, when I was
correcting you, it just...

Reminded me of that.
And made me-

Mad. Aw, Honeybee,

I'm so sorry for being such
a bossy bag of butts today.

Honestly, I was just
jealous that you were mayor.

But you know what? I don't care
if you're the town's favorite

as long as I'm still
your favorite.

Of course you are.
And I'm sorry, too.

Some of your ideas
were really great,

even if how you said them
sucked pinecones.

So, are we back to good?

Of course. I mean,
I'm a little annoyed

about the peppermint bark
supply,

which you know is impossible
to get April through August,

even on the dark web.

[chuckles] I know.
I guess I'll head back

to town hall
and undo all my doings.

I will no longer be popular,

-but it's the right thing.
-No way.

I know someone who's
already not popular

and pretty ready to make
everybody mad.

-Dane Cook?
-Well, yes, probably him too,

but I'm talking about me.

I hereby use my authority
as interim mayor

to name Wolf Tobin

as Lone Moose's
"temporary" interim mayor.

There's a new, newer mayor
in town

and he's about to flex
his "no" muscle.

[booing]

I may not be as popular
as my beloved wife,

and no, I was not elected,

nor do I have your confidence...

-I like you!
-Thanks, Dad.

-You look amazing.
-I know.

But I am here to fix stuff.

So, listen up, Lone Moose.

Here in my hand I hold
all of the bills

that your favorite mayor,
Honeybee Shaw, signed today.

I am now revoking all statutes
passed today by executive order.

So, holster your arrows,
pack up your bar,

cover your butt cheeks, and
disconnect your karaoke machine.

What about your sandwich
you left in the fridge?

Care to revoke that, too?
It's starting to stink.

Gwen, please, first,
I need to put an end

to this senseless bloodshed.

Ted's Folly's army,
you're with us.

I'm glad we're
all friends again.

Ew. Why is your hand so wet?

Ah, I wish I knew, Shanice.
I wish I knew.

-Group hug?
-Touch me

and I'll have you arrested
for war crimes.

One respectful nod it is.

Thank you for
your loyal service,

Temporary Interim Mayor Wolf.

It was my honor, Your Honor.

Lone Moose may not
like me right now,

but I know one person here
who loves me.

Look, I know you don't
need me to save you,

but I sure like helping you
from time to time.

Well, there's no one I'd
rather have save me than you.

Unless it's
a drowning situation,

in which case
I'm going Aquaman,

then The Rock,
then that whale

-that played Willy,
if he's free. -He is now.

All right, let's head home.

The peppermint bark may be gone,

but I think we still have some

potato-shaped holiday
novelty chocolates

from St. Patrick's Day
to dig into.

How about you dig into
this soggy hoagie?

Since you can't remember
to take it home,

you can wear it home, Wolf.

[yelps]

[grunts]

? And I... ?

-Honeybee, you saved me.
-Did I?

Oh, God,
there's sauce everywhere!

Shh. Just rest now.

You two are so flipping weird.

I'm going towards the light.

Don't you die on me!

I'm leaving.
Lock up when you go.

You got it, Gwen.

? ?

? I will always love... ?

? Bittersweet memories ?

? That is all I'm taking
with me ?

? So goodbye,
please don't cry ?

? We both know I'm not
what you, you need ?

? And I... ?

? Will always love you, ooh. ?

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