All language subtitles for The.Gentlemen.S01E04.NF.WEBRip

Dorset Hall was bought
by the fourth Lord Bassington in 1802

for the princely sum of £3,000.

The eighth Lord Bassington
still resides here.

It's only with his kind permission
that we're able to visit today.

So... follow me.

The house is famed for
its extensive collection of antiquities,

which led Lord Byron to quip

that it made the British Museum
look like a knickknack shop.

Highlights include

the priceless collection
of ivory chess pieces

that date back to the Byzantine era,

an ancient Egyptian sarcophagus, and...

And the, uh, sacred headdress

of the Aboriginal tribe
known as the Waka Waka.

Clear off!

I'll have no lizards in my house!

You hear me?

No fucking lizards...

You know what it is, James?

I'm angry. I'll tell you
what really champs my giblets.

I should be an asset to them.
They should want me around. I'm smart.

I'm a smart guy. I've got grades. It's...

It blows my mind, man.

I screw up one time...
maybe a couple, two, three times,

all of a sudden, I'm persona non gratis,
not wanted, en voyage.

It's... it's insane.

- It's ridiculous, is what it is, James.
- Freddy?

Just chill out, man.

Maybe I don't wanna chill out, James.

Maybe... maybe I need to get out of here.
What do you say? You and me.

I can't, bruv.
I've gotta meet someone.

Or more like something. Something special.

You know what?

- Oh, whoa! What are you doing? Freddy!
- I'm staying right here.

Oorah!

Freddy!

Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

As part of a general push
to increase productivity,

we've decided to expand our operation
on your estate.

The new weed farm would be underground,

but we'd be using the stables for access
and somewhere to keep the gennies.

No, Susie. It's not happening.

We agreed to move out on the proviso
that you'd help us make more money.

So while we await a detailed breakdown
of your new business plan,

I am simply cracking on.

Do it somewhere else.
Do it on one of your many other holdings.

What I do with other properties
in my portfolio

isn't something you should worry about.

What I'm worried about is the fact
that we agreed a timeline for your exit,

and now you're talking about
expanding your operation on my estate.

Freddy's gone fishing.

Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Great. Stay in touch.

Not the stables, darling.

They're of significant
historical importance.

Mother, Anne Boleyn
didn't change her horses there

on her way to visit Henry VIII.

By the time they were built, she'd been
a headless corpse for 300 years.

- Well, they may have been updated.
- It doesn't matter.

I'm not gonna let them
expand their operation on the grounds.

Would you like me
to have a word with Susie Glass?

You know I can be quite persuasive
when I need to be.

No, Mother. I don't want you
getting involved with these people.

I've seen the effect it's had on Freddy.

Yes, and the sooner
you get rid of them, the better.

I just need to figure out a way
of making them more money

with a little less fuss.

Now, come on.

Nothing like a good funeral
to put things in perspective.

Let not your hearts be troubled.

Believe in God, believe also in me.

In my Father's house are many rooms.

If it were not so, I would have told you.

I go to prepare a place for you.

And if I go and prepare a place for you...

What's with the window?

Oh, it was in his will.

Apparently, he wanted
to be buried standing up,

sticking out of the ground,
so he could have a view of the house.

Well, that's unpleasant.

Oh, that's the son there, Max.

Hmm.

He was one of Freddy's
acting chums from Durham.

If you think you've seen him before,

he did an advert for shampoo
that was everywhere.

No man cometh unto the Father,
but by me.

If ye had known me,

ye should have known my Father...

He's going to inherit the entire estate?

Yes.

The house, the debts,
the financial burden.

You two have a lot in common
in that respect.

Hello, Rosie.

How's your tummy?

- My tummy's fine. Thank you for asking.
- You ought to be more careful.

I might not be around
to help you next time.

Hopefully, there won't be a next time.

How's your American friend?

You're not jealous, are you?

A little protective, perhaps.

Well, that's very sweet of you.

- But I can look after myself.
- Oh, I'm sure you can.

But I'd be wary of Mr. Johnston.

Behind the air of pomposity,
there's a man you don't wanna fuck with.

Speak for yourself, Eddie.

How well do you know the son?

Oh, Max?

He's rather lovely.
He's your classic struggling artist.

Just a little too desperate
to be discovered.

Ever since his father died,
he's been like a bird with a broken wing.

Would you introduce me?

You're up to something, Eddie.

Never.

I remember Freddy.
The year above me at Durham.

He was a bloody good Demetrius.

Midsummer Night's Dream. I was Lysander.

He should have stuck at it.
Seriously, he could've walked into RADA.

Oh, Freddy has many talents,
but sticking isn't one of them.

I heard you've been getting a lot of work.

Oh, I can't complain.

Acting is like any great art form.

It's the paradoxical reconciliation
of our dualistic identities

to recognize ironic beauty
concealed within the malign.

Though there's easier ways
of making a living, God knows.

Max, darling, you have my sympathies.

Now I must go and rescue my mother.

I wanted to offer my condolences.
I recently lost my own father.

- A right kick in the balls, isn't it?
- Certainly.

Then add to that the inheritance tax,
which is ludicrous.

When I found out the running costs,
I thought they were fucking joking.

Could've been the same for me.

Fortunately,
my father made... certain provisions.

You know, uh,

it may be worth
you and I sitting down, actually.

There's a small business opportunity
that... might be of help to you.

Supply a product
that is highly profitable,

totally unregulated,

inherently benign, and incredibly popular.

I'm warming to this, Eddie. I really am.

It's the kind of risk-reward relationship
I could get on board with.

Free market, fucking great.

Lack of regulation, check.

No taxation? Yeah, baby.

Smidge of illegality?

Yeah, well, no business plan's perfect.

There is, however, one tiny little

reputational obstacle
that we need to navigate

before we could proceed,

and it's... it's slightly delicate.

Well, I can be extremely discreet
if necessary.

You must remember, your father and mine,
they used to fish for salmon on the Spey.

That's right.

And that matters,

particularly as it's my father
who's the cause

of this specific challenge.

I have in my possession
a series of documents

detailing the purchase
of a particularly salacious artifact.

If these documents
were ever to come to light,

they would cause considerable scandal.

In return for £500,000,
I will hand them over to you.

If not, I will be forced
to pass them on to the nation's press.

Do not make the mistake
of underestimating me.

Can't you just ignore it?

Your father clearly had some demons.
Whatever he did dies with him.

I'm about to have a second audition
for a role in a major Hollywood movie.

But, as you can see,

any kind of hoo-ha is gonna
seriously torpedo my chances.

You've clearly got some... connections,

and I imagine they would come replete

with the necessary skill set
to deal with this situation.

Here's how I see it going.

You make contact with the blackmailer.

You bring them, and whatever
evidence they have, back here,

I'll take a look,
make sure it's the real deal, destroy it,

and then... you can help me convince them
never to darken my door again.

There is, um, one more thing
I would, uh, just ask, Eddie.

When you lay your hands on the file,

I'd really appreciate it
if you didn't look inside.

Whatever secrets my father had,
I'd appreciate it if they stayed secret.

A matter of respect for the deceased.

Whatever is in the file
is none of my concern.

Your father's secrets will remain secret.
You have my word.

But let's be clear.

If I do this for you,

then we have an agreement.

If you can make this problem go away,

you and your criminal associates
can turn this place

into the Hanging Gardens
of the Original Rude Boy Ganja Man

for all I care.

Uh...

I, um...

I... I thought
you might like some refreshment.

That's very kind, Your Grace.

- Two sugars, if memory serves?
- Absolutely.

You seem to have worked wonders
with that dog.

She's a wonderful dog.
Pleasure to have around.

I'm sure Eddie's very appreciative.

It's not like he hasn't got enough
to contend with right now.

I wonder if we could be
of some assistance to him.

Come on, Geoff.

What have you got up your sleeve?

What if we could find
an alternative venue for their activities?

I'm sure you've been acquainted
with Mr. Rokes

from Green River Farm next door.

The sheep farmer? What are you saying?

Well, sheep need a lot of land to graze.

And lamb's
not turning a profit these days.

He's broke?

Mr. Rokes is being investigated for fraud
by the Ministry of Agriculture.

So he's not just broke.

He's as bent as a barbed wire fence.

There's a sheep auction today,

and I'm pretty sure
Mr. Rokes will be in attendance.

You sly old fox.

Plants are actually
a lot more like humans

than people tend to think.

They breathe.

They're territorial.

They communicate with each other.

How come you know
so much about plants?

It's what I do, I guess.

- I'm like a botanist.
- Oh, no way.

My granddad used to run a nursery.

Flowers, not kids.

I like flowers.

Hmm.

I'd love to see your plants one day.

Oh.

That's a bit of a tricky one.

Where I work is sort of like a...
restricted access area sort of thing.

I trust you.

It's just... recently we... we've been
having a bit of trouble at work.

Some of our plants went missing.

Oddly enough,
it was on the day that we met.

What? You don't think
I had anything to do with that, do you?

Oh, no, course not.

Yeah.

I mean, what am I gonna steal
a load of plants for?

Traditionally, the selection
process for a prospective new landlord

takes place over a couple of months.

We like to give their bums
a good old sniff.

We don't just rock up at funerals
waving our check books around.

Look, it was a business opportunity
that was presented to me.

And now I'm presenting it to you.

This gives you an alternate venue,
an increased capacity,

and replaces the existing operation
on my estate by the end of the year.

I'm willing to consider expanding
the operation to a 12th location,

but when you start talking about
a bit of blackmail,

then it's all starting
to sound deeply problematic.

It's a loose end that I intend to tie up.
Very simply, very easily.

I'm willing to take
a face-to-face meeting,

but I'm not making any promises,
and I don't want any shenanigans.

No shenanigans.

Okay.

Who are you?

Don't turn around.

All right. All right.

- I'm the guy with the money.
- Put the bag on the floor.

That's not how this is gonna work.

I'm the one who says
how this is gonna work.

Otherwise, your mate's face

is gonna be on the cover
of every newspaper tomorrow morning.

The only way you're gonna get your money
is if you do exactly as I... say.

You're Frank?

Come on,
give me the documents, then.

I get it. You want the documents.

Yes.

Well, I don't have
the documents here.

Shall we go get them then? Please.

A 12,

a 20,

two 53s,

and a 69.

I like to think of myself
as a fairly patient man, Frank.

But when you start ordering
chicken bao buns...

Let me translate.

Twelve is vegetable spring rolls.

Twenty is confit of pork.

Fifty-three is crispy noodle chips,

which I've ordered twice
'cause I'm quite partial to.

And 69 you'll find isn't on the menu.

For the simple reason that 69

isn't a dish.

What is it, then?

It's not a "what."

It's a "who."

And here he is.

- All right, all right.
- It's all there, every penny.

Whoa!

Frank, why don't you explain
to the nice man this isn't his money?

The money in that bag is owed to me.

And what's owed to me belongs to you.

- Sorry.
- Fucker...

- Hello, Susie.
- Just checking in to see how you're doing.

Well, it's not going exactly to plan.

So you gave him half a mil,
now you've got nothing to show for it?

Sounds a bit sloppy,
if you don't mind me saying.

What's the name
of the guy that lent him the money?

I don't know.
He's a large Chinese gentleman.

She wants to talk to you.

Can I help you? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I see. Yeah.

Yeah. All right.

When you put it like that,
it does have a bearing on the situation.

With the greatest respect, Susie,

that money's a longstanding debt
that needs to be repaid.

- For fuck's sake.
- That's very decent of you.

If you can guarantee my money,
I'll give your man the address.

Tell your father I'll send him some buns.

You should've mentioned Susie Glass.
She said she'll meet you there.

Hello, Susan.

Compliments of the chef.

Enjoying your little sojourn
into the murky world of criminality?

Uh...

It's certainly edifying.

- Shall we?
- Let's.

You're not the taxi.

No, we were...
We're looking for your dad. Is he around?

He's busy packing.

That's all right, darling.
This won't take long.

Hello, Francis. You going somewhere?

Um... How did you find me?

Oh, that would be down
to your helpful Chinese friend.

Now, weren't you supposed to give us
something before you go?

If you can find it amongst all these bags.

Your dad's a bit of a messy pup, isn't he?

Yeah,
Daddy's a bit of a mess, isn't he?

That's what Mummy's
always saying.

But you'd be surprised what nutrition
can be found in other people's stools.

See that one there?

That's a former cabinet minister.

Collects illegally smuggled birds' eggs.

This one
is a certain children's TV presenter.

Got himself a taste for, uh...

You like the breakfast show,
don't you, darling?

Daddy used to be
one of the top journalists in the country.

Then the oligarchs took over.

Yes, no freedom of the press anymore.
You have to answer to the powers that be.

And if you don't follow their narrative,
they bury you. But not me.

My daddy's got integrity.

Oh yeah.

Big plastic bags full of it.

Tell you what, darling,

why don't you tell Mummy
to make a cup of tea?

We don't wanna be late for our flight.

Oh, no, don't you worry.

We've got loads of time. Go on.

- Sit down, Frank.
- Whoa, steady.

We don't wanna hurt you or your family.
But we want the file.

Here, that's it.

- This better be it.
- Aren't you gonna have a look?

See, that's just it, isn't it?
No one wants to look inside the folder.

That's why the world's gone to hell.

I'm not gonna look because,
firstly, it's of no interest to me.

And, secondly,

you're coming with us.

No one said anything about going anywhere.

You really not gonna open it?

No.

- Not even a little bit curious?
- Nah.

Let's get this done and get Max on board.

Fair enough.

One-ten, 11, dot. Twelve. I'm bid 13,
bid 14. £15 I'm bid. 16.

Ninety, you. Ninety, you. £100 bid.
102.102.102.

Yeah, there he is.

Standing up, front row,
the guy to the left.

What do you think's my best approach?
I mean... I can hardly walk up to the man

and ask him if he'd like to house
a cannabis farm under one of his barns.

I know his estate manager.

I could always introduce you.

But, in my opinion, I think it's better
if you go up and meet him yourself.

I mean, he'll know who you are.

I'm sure he'd be susceptible
to your powers of... persuasion, ma'am.

190 bid. 191, 191, 191.

You really think so, Geoff?

Well, we know he needs the money.

And you are very good with people,
if you don't mind me saying so.

Right, then. Wish me luck.

Good luck.

At 191...

Do you need a hand?

I'm fine, Geoff.

You know you shouldn't
smoke fish with pine, don't you?

Huh?

You're planning on smoking
that beautiful carp, but the resin,

it poisons the flesh.

Tsk!

I can't do anything right, can I?

I mean, Eddie's off
gallivanting around the country

pretending to be a gangster.

And I'm stuck here, alone,
with this... dead fish.

Freddy.

It's a lucky man
who's happy with his place in life.

It's like a secret garden.

I know, right?

That's how I like to see it.

It's like an underground world
filled with magical plants

that bring nothing but righteousness

and can help everyone feel so much better.

And it's all being outlawed by Babylon.

How many plants you got down here?

Rather not get into those details,
to be honest.

It's a bit... a bit sensitive information.

You worried
I'm gonna report you?

No, of course not.

It's just I like to take
my professional responsibilities

very seriously.

Me too.

Oh, snap.

What kind of work do you do?

I'm a consultant.

People bring me in when they've got
a problem, and I help them fix it.

A jack of all trades but a master of none
is oftentimes better than a master of one.

Wow. You're so clever.

D'you wanna smoke a joint or something?

I've got loads
of different flavors and strains.

Uh, I don't smoke.

- I don't mind if you do though.
- Maybe I'll just have a cheeky little one.

I'm sure there's one in the ashtray.

- Just give me two secs.
- Okay.

Be right back.

You reckon
the world would be a better place

if everyone smoked weed?

Um...

Not necessarily.

But it'd definitely make it
a lot more calmer.

You're gonna need a lot more than this
if you're gonna change the world.

Oh, no. This spot, it's just one of 12.

Each one as big as this?

There's ones even bigger.

That's a pretty substantial network.

Sure you don't want a toke?

Well, since I'm with
the king of green, why not?

Look at this. I can't believe
I'm letting him off for half a mil.

Don't get greedy.

We hand over the documents.
You get the money.

Then you pay back your friend.

How fitting that you arrive at night.

Really, Edward, your sense of timing
is wonderfully theatrical.

We thought you'd be keen
to clean this mess up as soon as possible.

Quite right. Quite right.

This is my, uh,
associate, Susan Glass.

Thrilled to meet you, Ms. Glass.

- Eddie's told me all about you.
- Hmm. Has he now?

Let me conclude
this rather sordid little business, then,

so we can get into the weeds
and start hashing out a deal.

Hmm.

That for me?

It's all there.
Photographs, files, documents, the lot.

You didn't look inside?

No, I didn't.

Good man. Good man.

Now, I'm well aware you could have
some additional backup

squirreled away somewhere.

That's why
I wanted to have this little chat.

This is the last you'll see of me.
You have my word.

Trouble is,

your word's absolutely meaningless.

Frank, I think you understand
the gravity of the situation.

You're not to be heard from again, and if
that's understood, the money is yours.

As promised.

Just because
you've got some muscle now

doesn't change what you really are.

And what was in that envelope
is as compromising as it gets

for you and your career.

Whatever his father was doing,
it's over now.

What are you talking about his father for?
I wasn't blackmailing his father.

I was blackmailing that mad cunt.

Well...

that's somewhat of a revelation, Maxie.

Okay.

There's a perfectly reasonable explanation
for all of this,

and it is nothing that will upset anyone

unless they are...
unbelievably oversensitive.

Hold your horses, cowboy.

I think you need to adjust
your transparency settings.

You need to tell us
what is going on right now.

It's nothing.
It's a little quirk. It's a hobby.

Right... now.

Okay.

If full transparency will help
grease the wheels of industry, then, um...

...follow me.

What do you make of them?

They seem, uh,

unremarkable.

Take a closer look.

Adolf Hitler.

His use of light is second to none.

If it wasn't for the war,

he'd be remembered
with the likes of Monet.

And I'm in possession

of the largest collection of his work
outside of Switzerland.

He was a visionary.

These painting are average, at best.

Anyone who thinks otherwise is deluded.

I thought a man of your unique lineage

might be able to appreciate
the work of a true master.

See beyond the reputation of the man
to find the sublime in the malign.

Your Lordship,

maybe you could show them
the crown jewels.

Maybe you're right.

After an injury
at the Battle of the Somme,

Adolf Hitler was examined
by an army doctor.

The records show that he lost
a very particular part of his anatomy.

When it came up for sale five years ago,

I made sure nothing stood in my way.

The sole physical remnant
of the Führer of the Third Reich.

Preserved in formaldehyde
for nearly 80 years.

Adolf Hitler's

nutball.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

Had he not lost his right testicle,

the balance between logic and creativity
would have been held in check,

and the world blessed
with the next da Vinci.

Instead, what was sweet turned sour,
but no less creative.

He still remained a brand genius.

Think of the theater,
the pageantry of the Third Reich.

The Hugo Boss uniforms,
the aesthetic construction of the Luger,

the dynamic lines of the Messerschmitt.

The ironic, iconic symbolism

of the majestic eagle resting
upon the ancient Indian symbol for peace.

And just as the acorn retains
the potential of the fully grown oak,

I am now in possession of the genesis
of Hitler's creative genius.

In his teste.

I'm not sure
this is gonna work, Max.

Susie, we're done here.

Come on, Eddie, don't be a wuss.

Let's not be too hasty, Edward.

I don't care about his ideological
or his philosophical positions.

I came to explore
a possible business venture,

and whatever's floating around in that jar

is gonna have
an impact on our negotiations.

Now, this is
what's called leverage, Eddie.

We have a special rate
for people like him.

- What do you mean, people like me?
- Max!

Can't let you do that, Frank.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Everyone, just calm down.

I'm not gonna let anything jeopardize
my career. You have no fucking idea

how hard I've had to work
to get into this position.

I'm gonna be a fucking star!

Got one body in the house
that needs disposing of

and one somewhat unsympathetic gentleman
who requires your attention.

What happened, boss?

After a rather bizarre revelation...

Nutball.

...negotiations took
an unexpected turn.

There were some minor
disagreements about the deal structure.

But Eddie here proved himself
remarkably capable at arbitration.

Oh fuck.

After the inevitable
to-ing and fro-ing,

we managed to iron out terms that were...

...acceptable to all parties.

What do you want us to do?

Impress upon Lord Fuckhead
the details of our contract.

Unless you have any objections,
Your Grace? I know he was a family friend.

- No. Do your worst.
- What about him?

- He'll be all right.
- Yeah.

Come on, then.

Easy. Easy. Easy, easy.

My goodness, Edward.
You simply reek of formaldehyde.

Where on earth have you been?

And why are you drinking whiskey
first thing in the morning?

The less said about that, the better.

But, suffice to say, it's been, uh...
...a rather long night.

Oh. Well, whilst you've been gadding about
doing God knows what,

I have been finding solutions
to our current predicament.

Right.

I've found a new home
for your marijuana plantation.

What?

It's Mr. Rokes, darling.

From next door.

He's sitting on 2,000 acres
that he can't afford to keep,

and he is longing to talk to someone
about a long-term lease.

Well, well.

You would not believe the things I've done
in the last 48 hours, Mother.

And you come along
and... fix it all with a glass of sherry.

I've got a lot of time for your mum.
Takes good care of herself.

Good sense of humor.

A little bit eccentric, but who isn't?

Just a little. So are you gonna
talk to my neighbor, then?

I'll take the meeting.
See if it's appropriate.

At least someone did their due diligence.

Despite the, uh, few minor niggles

we might've come across
in the last couple of days,

you actually came out on top.

I don't appreciate being shot at, Edward.

In fact,
and this may come as a shock to you,

given my chosen career path,

I actually make a point
of avoiding being shot at, at all times.

Having said that,

I will admit
you proved yourself useful in the end.

Oi, oi, love birds.

Don't mind me.

Hello, mate.

Fire in the hole.

I've gotta get this straight,

'cause Blanket was making no sense.

According to him, you had a spin
on master chef over there

and blew up a load of Nazis.

With a fucking grenade.

Nazi. Singular.

Now we have a rare art collection
and two farms to set up.

I take it all back.

Suze, he's a proper G.

You're a fucking idiot, Jack.

To Eddie, the grand duke
of getting shit done.

Hmm, no, no, no.
I'm not cheersing to that.

All right.

Why don't we cheers to

looking in the envelope?

To looking in the envelope.

Whatever the fuck that means.