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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,966 --> 00:00:10,051 So Mum remarries, and we move here. 2 00:00:11,219 --> 00:00:12,846 - Mmm. -It's all very straightforward. 3 00:00:13,763 --> 00:00:15,265 Is your dad still around? 4 00:00:15,890 --> 00:00:18,601 Yeah, you could definitely say that. 5 00:00:18,685 --> 00:00:19,811 What does he do? 6 00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:23,314 Uh, he's-- Well, he's not fit for work right now. 7 00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:27,360 Look, can we just skip the family history section? It's so boring. 8 00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:33,867 "Depiction of the battle of Claire's Accessories circa 2010 CE". 9 00:00:35,076 --> 00:00:36,369 Oh, yeah. 10 00:00:36,453 --> 00:00:38,788 That's when my mum tried to stop me getting my nose pierced. 11 00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:39,998 But I did it anyway. 12 00:00:40,081 --> 00:00:41,458 It got massively infected. 13 00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,251 She was so mad. 14 00:00:43,335 --> 00:00:44,419 It was totally worth it. 15 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:45,545 Hmm. 16 00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:48,715 What? 17 00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:50,383 Maybe it's silly, 18 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:53,261 but my wife's a teacher, and she thought it would be good for me 19 00:00:53,345 --> 00:00:56,890 to give these gold stars to my clients when they make progress. 20 00:00:56,973 --> 00:00:59,517 But, um, I don't think you have. 21 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,478 -At least, not with your mum. -No, I have. 22 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:03,313 I did that homework you asked me to do. 23 00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,358 I invited her to dinner to fix our relationship. 24 00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:08,818 And how did that go? 25 00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:12,864 Good. 26 00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:15,367 You selfish wee bitch. 27 00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:17,786 -Well, you raised me. -Don't remind me. Waste of time. 28 00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:19,913 -I hate you. -I hated you first! 29 00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:21,956 Really positive. 30 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,224 You said that my shitty relationship with my mum 31 00:01:39,307 --> 00:01:40,850 could be what's blocking my power. 32 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:42,686 Shitty being the clinical term, yeah. 33 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:47,148 Yes. So, I invited her and Ian-- That's my stepdad-- 'round for dinner. 34 00:01:47,732 --> 00:01:50,985 Just a pleasant, grown-up, civil evening. 35 00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:58,451 Oh, and I forgot, she also wanted to come 'round 36 00:01:58,535 --> 00:01:59,828 to properly get to know my boyfriend. 37 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:03,081 So I'm letting her into my life, which she's always whingeing about. 38 00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:05,375 -What's your boyfriend's name again? -Jiz-- 39 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:07,085 Immy. Jimmy. 40 00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:08,878 -Jimmy. - Hmm. 41 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,881 -Jimmy and your mum get along? -Um… 42 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,679 Well, if it isn't the whore. 43 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:21,808 ♪ I'm dancing in the club Got my bottle ♪ 44 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,145 They took a little time to warm up. 45 00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:26,229 Hmm. 46 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,064 How is your relationship? 47 00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:30,150 I noticed some trouble there around his-- 48 00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:33,361 The secret psycho bitch wife and creepy spawn. Yeah. 49 00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:35,822 No, it's-it's hard, you know. 50 00:02:35,905 --> 00:02:37,824 But I think we're handling it with some grace. 51 00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:39,701 What's that? What are you writing? 52 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:43,204 Uh-- Don't be mad. 53 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:44,914 You made a list of my fucking pros and cons. 54 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:48,001 Nora said you're a bad person. I wanted to prove you're more good than bad. 55 00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:50,754 "Doesn't give to charity. Laughed at a weird-looking child. 56 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:53,465 Ate a doughnut out of the bin". That's not fair! 57 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:54,883 I thought I was alone. 58 00:02:57,802 --> 00:02:59,054 Yeah, we're chill. 59 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:00,722 Chill? Wow. 60 00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:03,558 So everything's, like, totally perfect? 61 00:03:03,641 --> 00:03:05,226 The vibe's emotionally stable? 62 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:06,936 Is it really that hard to believe 63 00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,688 that things are actually going okay for me? 64 00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:12,525 No, it just seems like there was a lot riding on this night. 65 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:16,571 Your power, your relationship, your family. 66 00:03:16,654 --> 00:03:19,199 Well, I was on my best behaviour. 67 00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:23,912 Here you go. 68 00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:32,253 Mum, did you do something different with your hair? 69 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,673 -It looks so up. -Blow dry. 70 00:03:34,756 --> 00:03:38,343 Are you in the habit of knocking up women and then abandoning them? 71 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:41,304 -Um-- -Are you using protection? 72 00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:45,642 -I appreciate your concern. -You're not ready for a child, Jennifer. 73 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:47,644 You are a child yourself. 74 00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,771 And genetically, it is doomed. 75 00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:53,358 We are physically robust but riddled with mental illness. 76 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:56,277 It helped during the famine, but the tables have turned, Jennifer. 77 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:58,738 -The tables have turned. -Nobody is getting pregnant. 78 00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:01,032 Ian, could you please pass the potatoes? 79 00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:05,120 Mash or roasted? 80 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:06,663 Ian had just watched Marley & Me, 81 00:04:06,746 --> 00:04:08,790 so I guess he sort of had an emotional hangover. 82 00:04:08,873 --> 00:04:11,167 Dangers of being an empath. 83 00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:20,260 This is-- This is a really lovely spread, Jen. 84 00:04:22,303 --> 00:04:25,265 A dog's love is so pure. 85 00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,726 -Um, I'm so sorry to interrupt. 86 00:04:27,809 --> 00:04:29,769 Jen, which photo of Kash do you think is better? 87 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:32,605 This one implies an exciting social calendar. 88 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,065 This one says, "I'm cultured, I travel, 89 00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:35,817 maybe we'll go to Prague and look at bridges". 90 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,194 You know it's meant to be an accurate representation of Kash? 91 00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:40,447 I-I'm sorry. What's all this? 92 00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:41,781 I'm sorry. What's all this? 93 00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:44,200 Oh, God. Right. 94 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,660 Okay, so-- 95 00:04:45,744 --> 00:04:47,579 Basically, Carrie and Kash split up, right? 96 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:50,290 And it's still pretty awkward, but they don't want it to be awkward. 97 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:53,126 So, they decide that the least awkward thing to do 98 00:04:53,209 --> 00:04:56,004 is to set each other up with other people so that they can both move on. 99 00:04:56,087 --> 00:04:58,840 -That makes sense. 100 00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:01,051 Yeah, that-that's what I said. 101 00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:03,928 That's so fucking stupid. 102 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:06,389 No, no, no, no. It's really smart. 103 00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:10,268 Who better to find your new partner than your old one? It's perfect logic. 104 00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,979 Human attraction is not based on logic. I mean… 105 00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:14,814 Jen, have you ever killed anyone? 106 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:18,568 -No. - Whew. 107 00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:20,195 Uh, don't be too obvious, okay? 108 00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,739 -I want Clark to know that I like him. - Mm-hmm. 109 00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:26,076 But I don't want him to know that I want him to know that I like him. 110 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,370 -Unless he likes me. - No, Carrie, relax. 111 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:30,038 You're looking at an experienced wingman. 112 00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:33,124 Yeah, Clark thinks he's just gonna have an innocent little bros night. 113 00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:34,376 -And then bam! 114 00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:35,752 He falls in love. 115 00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:37,170 -Oh. 116 00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:39,798 How long does a chicken take? Should I turn it up? 117 00:05:40,382 --> 00:05:42,300 Oh, no. No, not again. 118 00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:52,018 Oh, no! Wait! 119 00:05:53,645 --> 00:05:55,980 Stupid time. 120 00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:59,109 I keep getting pulled forward and back. It's making me seasick. 121 00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:02,278 -You still can't control it? - No. I'm time's bitch. 122 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,072 I'm getting bullied by a fucking watch. 123 00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:06,616 This is taking ages. Just gonna whack it up. 124 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:07,992 Oh, no. Don't do that. 125 00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:09,160 -Trust me. 126 00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,329 - Bye. -Okay. 127 00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:12,914 What does he know? 128 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,251 Oh. 129 00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,670 So, Kash is seeing if this guy from their work likes Carrie, 130 00:06:18,753 --> 00:06:21,756 and Carrie is setting Kash up on a dating app and finding him matches. 131 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,092 Yeah, that's great. But we're here to talk about you, right. So-- 132 00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:27,178 Yeah. Oh, no, I get that, but trust me, this is like… Oh, my God. 133 00:06:27,262 --> 00:06:28,596 It is pretty juicy. 134 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:30,849 So, then Kash goes to Clark's. 135 00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:32,392 -Woo-hoo! Bros night. 136 00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:33,768 -Bros night. 137 00:06:34,769 --> 00:06:37,105 No, not again. 138 00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:46,531 ♪ Baby, I compare you to a kiss From a rose on the grey ♪ 139 00:06:46,614 --> 00:06:48,158 ♪ Ooh, the more I get of you ♪ 140 00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:49,075 What? 141 00:06:49,159 --> 00:06:50,535 ♪ Stranger it feels ♪ 142 00:06:50,618 --> 00:06:52,620 -Bros night. 143 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,040 Bros night. 144 00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:57,250 Come in. 145 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,177 Right? 146 00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:08,553 If you're gonna keep evading my questions, 147 00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:11,348 I'm gonna start thinking you're not being fully honest with me. 148 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,391 We're in my mind. 149 00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:16,019 Think if I was lying, wouldn't something give it away? 150 00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:28,573 "The compiled lies of Jennifer Regan. 151 00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:31,159 -Read by Derek Jacobi". - Pfft. 152 00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:33,328 That doesn't prove anything. 153 00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:38,208 December 8th, 2018. 1:22 a.m. 154 00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,752 I would say that it's about average size. 155 00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:46,716 1:23 a.m. No, like, seriously, dude, I've seen smaller. 156 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:50,887 1:24 a.m. It's, like, more common than you think. 157 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,514 I saw it in a documentary. 158 00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:57,227 1:24 a.m. Yes, they make documentaries about that. 159 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:58,311 They don't. 160 00:07:58,395 --> 00:08:01,523 1:25 a.m. A lot of women prefer them that way. 161 00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:06,486 1:26 a.m. I promise I won't tell all my friends about your micro-penis. 162 00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:10,990 Chapter 108, faked orgasms. 163 00:08:11,074 --> 00:08:12,242 Right. Okay, okay. 164 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:15,286 Look, I might've massaged the truth a tiny little bit. 165 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:19,082 I will admit the beginning of the evening was a little rough. 166 00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:21,084 -So, Ian. -Hmm? 167 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,919 How does it feel to be a piece of shit? 168 00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:25,714 That might've been partly my fault though. 169 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:28,216 I'd given him some tips on how to win over my mum. 170 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,094 Like, insult the English. 171 00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,222 She's a simple woman. She's a sucker for old-fashioned chivalry. 172 00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:35,849 Now, hold the door open for her. 173 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:38,101 - Not the bathroom door! 174 00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,519 - Oh. 175 00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:41,771 -And I could've been more specific. 176 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:46,109 Whatever you do, agree with her. She's always right. 177 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:49,904 Now swap seats with me. I can see my reflection in the microwave. 178 00:08:49,988 --> 00:08:51,364 This top makes me look fat. 179 00:08:51,448 --> 00:08:53,575 Couldn't agree more, Mary. Huge. 180 00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:56,286 -Whoa. 181 00:08:56,369 --> 00:09:00,081 It can be a pointless task, chasing after the approval of someone else. 182 00:09:00,165 --> 00:09:02,042 Well, no, see, here's the weird thing. 183 00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:04,377 - When I came back from the bathroom… 184 00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:07,464 How did you get it three pounds cheaper at the other garden centre? 185 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:11,217 -And that is why you always shop around. - So true. 186 00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:13,678 -But I don't need to tell you that, do I? -No, no. 187 00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:16,931 No. 188 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:21,394 How did it go from that to that while you were in the bathroom? 189 00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:25,023 Uh, Ji-- Immy filled me in later on. 190 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:28,651 Apparently Mum was just being herself. 191 00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:35,867 I have nothing against you personally, but Jen already isn't very good at life. 192 00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:39,245 And she doesn't need anything else to hold her back. 193 00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:40,914 That's, um-- 194 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:44,709 God bless her, but she isn't ready for any of this. 195 00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:47,295 I mean, look. She can't even cook a chicken. 196 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,010 Hey! 197 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,679 Shu-- Shut up! 198 00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,555 - So he stood up for you? -Yeah. 199 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:58,640 Mmm. 200 00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:01,226 He said he told my mum everything that was great about me. 201 00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:03,311 Can she cook? No. 202 00:10:03,395 --> 00:10:05,188 Is she cool? No. 203 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,107 Does she have money? No. 204 00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:08,358 Is she tall? No. 205 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,360 Does she have a power? No. 206 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,986 Is she smart? 207 00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:13,196 Not so much. 208 00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:15,949 It's pretty romantic. 209 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:23,039 And-And sure, she's never gonna amount to anything, but I don't care. 210 00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,917 She's great, and I'm gonna prove it. 211 00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:27,585 You're always slagging her off. 212 00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:31,631 And maybe you should try slagging her on. 213 00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:43,643 Hmm. Hmm. 214 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:49,107 So, after that, things are going well? 215 00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:52,318 Yeah. Wholesome family fun. 216 00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:54,487 Hmm. Finding that hard to picture. 217 00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:55,947 Illuminate me. 218 00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:58,783 Sure, but first I need to catch you up on Carrie and Kash. 219 00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:00,744 -So Carrie was struggling. - Hmm. Mm-mmm. 220 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,704 Too much hair. Too little hair. 221 00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:04,789 -Horse-girl adjacent. -Mmm. 222 00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:06,458 Poor grammar. 223 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,501 Goth. Goldsmiths? 224 00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:09,961 I don't think. 225 00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:12,213 Carrie, you realise you have to say yes to some of them? 226 00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:14,674 I won't apologise for having high standards. 227 00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,301 -Well, what's wrong with this one? -Thumb. 228 00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:17,635 -Huh? -Weird thumb. 229 00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:19,721 Look, do you think maybe there's another reason 230 00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:21,514 you don't wanna set anyone else up with Kash? 231 00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:24,017 Like maybe you're not ready to see him with someone else? 232 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,020 Oh, my God. That is weird. What is that? 233 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:29,814 No. Uh, that's why we're finding dates for each other. 234 00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:32,067 So we're on the exact same post-break-up timeline, 235 00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:34,194 therefore standardising the emotional fallout. 236 00:11:34,277 --> 00:11:35,362 Humans aren't like that. 237 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,989 We're electrified meat sacks that do whatever our genitals tell us. 238 00:11:38,073 --> 00:11:40,033 I refuse to believe that. 239 00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:43,703 Kash and I have a plan, and we're not gonna let anything derail it. Hmm? 240 00:11:44,746 --> 00:11:46,581 I know it's really bougie to live alone, 241 00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:48,708 but in my defence, I do work six jobs. 242 00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:51,378 I shouldn't be home from my shift at Wagamama's till 11:00, 243 00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:52,921 -so we've got the place to ourselves. -Carrie! 244 00:11:53,004 --> 00:11:53,880 -Whoo! -Do you like her? 245 00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,965 Sorry, you actually physically scared me there. 246 00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,259 Carrie? Carrie from work? 247 00:11:58,343 --> 00:11:59,636 Yeah. She's fit. 248 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,971 She's fit, right? You think she's fit? I do. 249 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:04,974 I don't think she's exactly my type. Not being a man and everything. 250 00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:06,184 -Prophecy was true. -What? 251 00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:07,352 What? 252 00:12:11,189 --> 00:12:13,817 Let's watch something else. This has too many men in it. 253 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:14,984 -The football-- -Yeah. 254 00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:16,236 -Oh. 255 00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:17,696 Where's the women at? 256 00:12:17,779 --> 00:12:20,031 - The hot… 257 00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,157 …sexy women? 258 00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,243 Oh! 259 00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:26,830 -Sex and the City. Let's watch that. 260 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:30,125 Oh, wait, no. God. Um. I-- 261 00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:36,506 -The news. Yeah. The news. - Rescuers have scoured… 262 00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,550 -I mean, it's just facts. -…the crash site… 263 00:12:38,633 --> 00:12:40,510 -…but in a press conference this morning 264 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,262 it was announced there had been no survivors. 265 00:12:42,846 --> 00:12:46,099 In other news, cancers in children are on the rise. 266 00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:48,810 Once again, is this completely necessary for the story? 267 00:12:48,893 --> 00:12:50,103 Trust the journey. 268 00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:51,980 So, Kash is freaking out 269 00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:54,941 cause he's done, like, the opposite of what Carrie asked him to do. 270 00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:58,486 But he knows the exact scenario that leads up to their kiss, right? 271 00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:02,532 So he thinks all he has to do is avoid that exact scenario, and they won't kiss. 272 00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:06,661 No red wine, no Seal, no sofa, no problem. 273 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,512 - What are you doing? 274 00:13:24,596 --> 00:13:26,556 Ooh, I forgot I had that. Rioja. 275 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:27,891 I'll pour you a glass. 276 00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:30,268 Brilliant. 277 00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,523 Are you sitting down? 278 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:37,317 No, no. I like to stay on my feet. 279 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,235 Stay active. You know, supple. 280 00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:42,989 Now, are you sure Carrie's not for you? 281 00:13:43,073 --> 00:13:47,285 You know, from certain angles, she has kind of broad shoulders. 282 00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:49,329 Nope. Still pretty gay. 283 00:13:49,412 --> 00:13:51,623 Um-- Where's my speaker? 284 00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:53,291 Your speaker? 285 00:13:53,375 --> 00:13:54,376 Hmm. 286 00:13:59,381 --> 00:14:00,965 Gosh, I have no idea. 287 00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:02,717 Well, actually, it's fine. 288 00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:05,637 I've been meaning to try out my new record player. 289 00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:08,723 -Mmm. -I only have one album so far though. 290 00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:10,684 Uh, um-- 291 00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:13,937 Actually, I might call it a night. 292 00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:16,356 You're calling time on bros night already? 293 00:14:16,439 --> 00:14:17,440 I'm really tired, and-- 294 00:14:17,524 --> 00:14:19,401 Because I tracked down a replica medieval helmet. 295 00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:22,696 And I thought we could put it on and hit each other to see if we feel it. 296 00:14:23,738 --> 00:14:25,824 I mentioned I always wanted to do that. 297 00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:29,411 I remembered. 298 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,002 -Again, again. Do it again. -Okay. 299 00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:40,839 Okay, do it again. This time call me Lancelot. 300 00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,591 - Lancelot. 301 00:14:43,675 --> 00:14:45,802 -I can't feel a thing under here. 302 00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:48,513 -Keep going. I can't feel any-- 303 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:50,807 -I feel so alive. 304 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:51,891 -Come on! 305 00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:53,768 -Hmm. -But Carrie's getting pissed 306 00:14:53,852 --> 00:14:55,103 because Kash isn't replying to her. 307 00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:57,647 He's not replying to any of my messages. 308 00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,274 He hasn't even seen them. 309 00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:03,319 I just wanna know. Does Clark like me or not? 310 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,155 Do you want to do a little spying? 311 00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:08,742 I could hack into his phone and turn on the camera. 312 00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:09,659 Mum. 313 00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,745 I thought you wanted me to be good at technology. 314 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,621 Yeah, not to violate the Geneva Convention. 315 00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:14,831 - Do you do this a lot? 316 00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:16,207 No. 317 00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:17,292 Not people. 318 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:18,543 Just celebrities. 319 00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:22,255 You never guess what they be up to when they think no one's watching. 320 00:15:22,964 --> 00:15:25,008 Mary, I do think that is morally wrong. 321 00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:26,468 Unfortunately. 322 00:15:26,551 --> 00:15:28,636 Well, I've already done it. 323 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:33,058 Here is the now stream I patched in from the blue wave signal 324 00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:36,311 from the phone to the web camera in the clever TV. 325 00:15:36,394 --> 00:15:37,687 You got all of those words wrong. 326 00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:40,774 What you do with this is none of my business. 327 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:47,030 Jen, so how much are you paying me again to talk about you and your power? 328 00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:48,656 -A fuck ton. -A fuck ton. 329 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:50,617 So, let's focus on that, shall we? 330 00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:52,911 You and your mum are bonding-- 331 00:15:52,994 --> 00:15:56,373 -Which you said would give me a power. -Might help give you. 332 00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,626 Tell me more about wholesome family fun time. 333 00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,670 Land, but up. 334 00:16:01,753 --> 00:16:02,796 Mountains. 335 00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:04,506 -Foot house. -Shoe. 336 00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:06,299 -Dog. 337 00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:08,760 -Correct. 338 00:16:08,843 --> 00:16:10,512 - Jen and Jizz, eight. -She's-- 339 00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:12,138 Mary and Ian, zero. 340 00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:13,932 I see. 341 00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:18,228 Next few rounds, maybe we should be a team. 342 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,563 You never asked me to play with you before. 343 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:22,399 -You weren't ready. -I'm ready. 344 00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:26,236 We're going to dominate them. 345 00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:27,445 Mm-hmm. 346 00:16:31,825 --> 00:16:34,452 - Aw. -Aw. 347 00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,375 Oh. 348 00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:46,631 -Yeah, that's-- Yeah, okay. 349 00:16:46,715 --> 00:16:47,924 Too much. 350 00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:55,098 You understand that it's not so transactional, right? 351 00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:56,266 Yes, of course. 352 00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:59,227 I'm not just being nice to my mum so I can get a power. 353 00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:01,354 That'd be horrible. 354 00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:03,982 I'm being nice to my mum. Why don't I have a power? 355 00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:06,860 So, when a power doesn't materialise, you're fine with it? 356 00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:08,319 You don't try another tack? 357 00:17:08,403 --> 00:17:10,363 No. I'm very patient. 358 00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:13,700 And you're not hiding anything from me about your family? 359 00:17:13,783 --> 00:17:15,910 No. You can read all about it. 360 00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:17,954 Those are history books. 361 00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:19,289 -Your history books. -So? 362 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:20,790 History is written by the victors. 363 00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:23,710 There's not gonna be anything in there that doesn't make you look good. 364 00:17:23,793 --> 00:17:25,337 Maybe I'm just great. 365 00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,464 - Hmm. - Okay, no. 366 00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:30,383 I-I-I did have a backup plan. 367 00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:33,261 George said that my family should be closer, right? 368 00:17:33,345 --> 00:17:35,597 I've invited her in. I've introduced her to Jizz. 369 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,515 I'm being nice to her. What else is there? 370 00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:41,561 Well, the whole meet-the-parents thing, it's only really the beginning. 371 00:17:41,644 --> 00:17:43,646 -What did you just say? -The meet the parents-- 372 00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:45,065 Parents thing. 373 00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:46,900 Parent-suh. 374 00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:50,195 Oh, my God. I am so stupid. 375 00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:54,783 My power isn't coming through because my family isn't whole. 376 00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:04,167 No. 377 00:18:04,959 --> 00:18:06,211 So, you invited your dad? 378 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:08,046 Yeah. Makes sense, doesn't it? 379 00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:10,340 It does if you feel your family is fractured. 380 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,717 Um, did your parents have a bad divorce? 381 00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:15,261 Uh, th-they're not strictly divorced. 382 00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:17,639 More estranged. 383 00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:19,140 Yeah, anyway. 384 00:18:19,224 --> 00:18:21,935 Dad has always been a bit of a sore spot with Mum. 385 00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:23,937 So, how did it go when he arrived? 386 00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:25,814 Right. So… 387 00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:29,150 We should get the whole suit. 388 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:31,903 - Jen! - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 389 00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:33,571 But it ties everything together. I promise. 390 00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:36,366 We should get the whole suit. 391 00:18:37,534 --> 00:18:39,744 It opens up so many options. 392 00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:43,123 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 393 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,793 Fireworks. 394 00:18:48,712 --> 00:18:50,797 Do you want a cup of tea? I'm parched. 395 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:51,881 Oh, yeah. 396 00:18:51,965 --> 00:18:54,050 - Do you take milk? -Uh, no. Just tea. 397 00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,135 ♪ Thicc ♪ 398 00:18:55,218 --> 00:18:56,678 Maybe I should try some milk. 399 00:18:56,761 --> 00:18:58,179 ♪ I like how you swing your hips ♪ 400 00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:01,182 Maybe I like milk, but I wasn't socialised to think it was an option. 401 00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:03,184 I mean, I could just try a dash. 402 00:19:03,685 --> 00:19:05,353 It's not all black or all milk. Right? 403 00:19:05,437 --> 00:19:06,563 Tea exists on a spectrum. 404 00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:08,732 ♪ Chicken nuggets, we should dip ♪ 405 00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:11,985 Um, I'll just leave the milk out, and you can do it yourself. 406 00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:13,737 Music? 407 00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:21,619 Okay. 408 00:19:22,871 --> 00:19:28,585 ♪ There's so much a man can tell you So much he can say ♪ 409 00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:30,754 ♪ You remain… ♪ 410 00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:32,881 Oh! I forgot to put the sugar in there. 411 00:19:32,964 --> 00:19:34,299 Oh! Oh. 412 00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:35,550 Oh, gosh. 413 00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:36,843 I'm so-- Rats. 414 00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,303 Oh, gosh. 415 00:19:38,386 --> 00:19:40,638 It's gone everywhere. Oh, God, did it get on you? 416 00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:41,848 I'm so, so sorry. 417 00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:44,309 Oh. 418 00:19:44,392 --> 00:19:47,062 Okay, so that's not how I wanted the dinner to end. 419 00:19:47,145 --> 00:19:49,105 Don't add it to your cons list! 420 00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:51,524 Well, you did just make your mum cry. 421 00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:52,942 But that wasn't my intention. 422 00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:56,237 Like she is perfect. The fucking webcam peeper. 423 00:19:57,572 --> 00:19:59,324 One little check-in can't hurt. 424 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:08,958 ♪ My eyes become large and the light That you shine can't be seen ♪ 425 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:16,383 ♪ Baby, I compare you to a kiss From a rose on the grey ♪ 426 00:20:17,509 --> 00:20:22,555 ♪ Ooh, the more I get of you The stranger it feels, yeah ♪ 427 00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:25,642 And there wasn't any tear-fall. Her eyes were moderately damp at best. 428 00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:33,483 And she saw the whole thing. 429 00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:40,031 I'm sorry. I don't understand. How does this tie everything together? 430 00:20:41,658 --> 00:20:43,118 Oh, I-I guess it doesn't. 431 00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:47,038 Why do I get the feeling you don't want me to know how this dinner ends? 432 00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:50,375 Fine. 433 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,295 We always finish the night with 'Guess the Celebrity'. 434 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,757 -Am I a politician? -No. 435 00:20:57,841 --> 00:20:59,009 Have I won an Oscar? 436 00:21:00,135 --> 00:21:01,469 -Maybe. 437 00:21:01,553 --> 00:21:03,054 So I'm a woman? Am I white? 438 00:21:03,138 --> 00:21:04,180 - Yes. -Taylor Swift. 439 00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:06,016 - Should've made it harder. 440 00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:08,393 Whoa, now, there's still someone left to play. 441 00:21:09,561 --> 00:21:10,437 Hello, Beanie. 442 00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,441 Carrie did me one, so I've no idea. 443 00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:16,568 -It's not cheating. 444 00:21:19,571 --> 00:21:22,032 Are you sure she's okay? I've never seen her so quiet. 445 00:21:22,115 --> 00:21:24,117 It's fine. Yeah. I-It's family games night. 446 00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,618 We're all family. 447 00:21:25,702 --> 00:21:28,830 Aw. This is a good one. 448 00:21:33,752 --> 00:21:35,003 Now, go on. Guess. 449 00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:36,755 Mmm. 450 00:21:36,838 --> 00:21:40,008 It's a bit on the nose, but am I alive? 451 00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:49,142 Hey, we're not finished playing. 452 00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:51,019 Don't even speak to me. 453 00:21:51,102 --> 00:21:52,312 -Just don't. -Mum. 454 00:21:52,395 --> 00:21:58,068 I told you time and again, I do not want to talk to him. 455 00:21:58,151 --> 00:22:00,403 But you have to step out of your comfort zone to grow and-- 456 00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:06,409 Don't give me that clinic woo-woo, self-help smoothie bullshit! 457 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:08,453 I don't want to grow. I'm done. 458 00:22:09,371 --> 00:22:10,413 He died. 459 00:22:11,081 --> 00:22:13,917 I've dealt with it. I moved on. 460 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,543 Uh, someone's moved the buttons on this. 461 00:22:15,627 --> 00:22:17,962 Oh, fuck me for wanting a family again then. 462 00:22:18,046 --> 00:22:19,714 I was just trying to do something nice. 463 00:22:19,798 --> 00:22:21,633 You have a family. 464 00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:25,303 Do you know how hurtful that is to Ian? 465 00:22:25,804 --> 00:22:28,807 It does feel like a searing hot knife through my heart. 466 00:22:28,890 --> 00:22:30,684 But we have to consider her feelings too. 467 00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:33,520 Yes. Yeah, thank you, Ian. Yeah, tell her. 468 00:22:33,603 --> 00:22:36,314 She's full of absolute longing and desperation. 469 00:22:36,398 --> 00:22:37,982 -For my family. 470 00:22:38,066 --> 00:22:39,693 For a power. Huh? 471 00:22:43,947 --> 00:22:45,865 You selfish wee bitch. 472 00:22:45,949 --> 00:22:48,702 -Well, you raised me. -Don't remind me. Waste of time. 473 00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:50,787 -I hate you. -I hated you first! 474 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:54,582 And I'm glad you like talking to him, 475 00:22:54,666 --> 00:22:59,045 because he's the only parent you'll be talking to. 476 00:22:59,129 --> 00:23:00,922 Good. He's the one I wanted. 477 00:23:01,798 --> 00:23:03,258 -Ian! -Yes. Sorry. 478 00:23:04,676 --> 00:23:07,929 ♪ It was a wedding upstate ♪ 479 00:23:08,013 --> 00:23:10,598 ♪ That rekindled an ache ♪ 480 00:23:12,684 --> 00:23:16,438 ♪ I thought it would fade, boy ♪ 481 00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:19,065 What's that? What are you writing? 482 00:23:20,650 --> 00:23:22,235 Uh, don't be mad. 483 00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:24,154 -Wow. -I know. 484 00:23:25,488 --> 00:23:28,408 I'm a little confused. Your mum's reaction seems way over the top. 485 00:23:28,491 --> 00:23:30,368 I know. Geez. 486 00:23:30,452 --> 00:23:32,162 She can never see things from my perspective. 487 00:23:33,038 --> 00:23:34,289 People don't just act like that. 488 00:23:34,372 --> 00:23:37,792 Is there anything about your dad that might explain your mum's actions? 489 00:23:38,585 --> 00:23:39,586 Um… 490 00:23:40,503 --> 00:23:41,504 I don't-- 491 00:23:42,297 --> 00:23:44,549 No, I can't think of anything. 492 00:23:45,717 --> 00:23:46,843 Jen. 493 00:23:47,385 --> 00:23:48,636 Jennifer. 494 00:23:49,262 --> 00:23:50,430 Look at me. 495 00:23:52,807 --> 00:23:54,476 I thought we'd gone over this. 496 00:23:58,938 --> 00:24:00,440 - Okay, Jen. -He's dead. 497 00:24:03,985 --> 00:24:05,195 My dad's dead. 498 00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:08,865 I speak to him through Carrie. 499 00:24:10,241 --> 00:24:11,242 Mum never has. 500 00:24:14,329 --> 00:24:15,955 This would've been helpful to know earlier. 501 00:24:16,039 --> 00:24:17,040 Yeah, I know. 502 00:24:17,123 --> 00:24:20,835 But… …you know, it's-- it's a bit-- 503 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,464 Well, you're gonna say it's a bit fucked up, aren't you? 504 00:24:25,048 --> 00:24:27,342 No. No. 505 00:24:28,093 --> 00:24:29,427 It was a disaster. 506 00:24:30,845 --> 00:24:34,391 I was a shit girlfriend and a shit daughter. 507 00:24:35,892 --> 00:24:37,268 And I feel like shit. 508 00:24:37,352 --> 00:24:38,353 ♪ Yesterday's gone now ♪ 509 00:24:41,856 --> 00:24:45,276 ♪ I want to move out ♪ 510 00:24:46,736 --> 00:24:52,158 ♪ Out in the world where We'll go anywhere ♪ 511 00:24:52,242 --> 00:24:53,243 Good girl. 512 00:24:54,703 --> 00:24:56,287 ♪ If you're brave, come and get some ♪ 513 00:24:56,371 --> 00:24:58,748 ♪ Come and get some Come and come and get some ♪ 514 00:24:58,832 --> 00:25:00,834 ♪ If you're brave, come and-- Come and get some ♪ 515 00:25:00,917 --> 00:25:02,836 ♪ Come and get some Come and come and get some ♪ 516 00:25:02,919 --> 00:25:04,921 ♪ Looking at me Caught you looking at me ♪ 517 00:25:05,005 --> 00:25:07,757 ♪ Looking at me Caught you looking at me ♪ 518 00:25:07,841 --> 00:25:09,676 ♪ Can’t afford what you see, no way ♪ 519 00:25:09,759 --> 00:25:12,345 ♪ Can’t afford what you see, no way ♪ 520 00:25:21,604 --> 00:25:25,025 ♪ As I'm sitting in my room Feeling kinda depressed ♪ 521 00:25:25,108 --> 00:25:28,570 ♪ Everything is such a mess Am I overwhelmed, yes ♪ 522 00:25:28,653 --> 00:25:31,573 Shh. It's problematic. 523 00:25:32,741 --> 00:25:34,784 -What was that? -Uh-- Nothing. 524 00:25:35,702 --> 00:25:37,537 ♪ I'm a mess Down and unimpressed ♪ 525 00:25:38,371 --> 00:25:39,497 Mmm. 526 00:25:39,581 --> 00:25:41,124 ♪ Never happy at my best ♪ 527 00:25:41,207 --> 00:25:43,793 -♪ It's not you, it's me again ♪ -♪ I'm a mess ♪ 528 00:25:46,046 --> 00:25:47,672 ♪ I'm obsessed ♪ 529 00:25:50,300 --> 00:25:52,969 ♪ Depression is my middle name ♪ 530 00:25:53,803 --> 00:25:56,973 ♪ Prescription is not the same ♪ 531 00:25:57,057 --> 00:25:59,893 ♪ Depression is my middle name ♪ 532 00:25:59,976 --> 00:26:04,689 ♪ No, I don't know why I'm laughing I'm just a sad bitch ♪ 533 00:26:04,773 --> 00:26:07,067 ♪ Sad bitch ♪ 534 00:26:07,150 --> 00:26:10,487 ♪ Sad bitch ♪ 535 00:26:10,570 --> 00:26:14,240 ♪ Sad bitch, bad bitch Don't get too attached bitch ♪ 536 00:26:14,324 --> 00:26:17,660 ♪ Blastin', desperate Not someone to mess with ♪ 537 00:26:17,744 --> 00:26:21,164 ♪ Lost those minds Just give in to the meds ♪ 538 00:26:21,247 --> 00:26:24,876 ♪ No, I don't know why I'm laughing I'm just a sad bitch ♪40069

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