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1
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:38,514
Got some.
2
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:34,236
Dad peed in his pants.
Get used to it, son.
3
00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:36,572
When I'm old,
you'll have to change my diaper.
4
00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:45,247
Another year over.
I can't believe it.
5
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,249
I can't believe our sons are 7.
6
00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:49,918
In a couple years,
they'll be starting a band
7
00:02:50,086 --> 00:02:51,587
growing their hair long
8
00:02:51,754 --> 00:02:53,714
stealing your Suburban
to go on tour.
9
00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:59,052
Charlie, we have ourselves
a situation.
10
00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:00,554
Okay, I'll be a minute.
11
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:01,847
Phil. Phil.
12
00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:06,435
Rare. Good. See?
13
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:09,938
Save room for cake.
14
00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:21,283
Never mind that on the cake.
15
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,788
Hey, Mom.
Hey, slow down.
16
00:03:26,956 --> 00:03:31,293
It was the end of Summer Olympiad
between us and our rival camp.
17
00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,629
The final event: The relay race.
18
00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:36,840
Coming down the stretch,
I was flying like the wind.
19
00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:38,675
You were sweating sheets of rain.
20
00:03:38,843 --> 00:03:40,761
You could barely move
in a straight line.
21
00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,804
I was still in the lead.
Whatever.
22
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,807
I hand the baton to Charlie,
he drops it, we lose everything.
23
00:03:45,975 --> 00:03:49,269
Then Lance Warner flew
right past you to the finish line.
24
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:53,482
I hated that snot-nosed little brat.
He's why I didn't have a good time.
25
00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:58,403
Honey, why is Ben going on and on
about going off to camp?
26
00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:01,198
The permission slip's been
on the fridge for three weeks.
27
00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:03,784
He really Wants to go,
and I think he should.
28
00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:07,120
Well, Phil and I have talked,
the boys aren't going.
29
00:04:07,288 --> 00:04:09,998
What do you mean?
I mean, they're not going.
30
00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:12,501
All those snakes and spiders
and wedgies.
31
00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:15,504
Just because you had
a bad experience as a kid at camp
32
00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:17,798
doesn't mean
our son Will have one too.
33
00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:21,760
What are you talking about?
I was there. You were scarred for life.
34
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:24,346
I'm on the ground,
staring up at my father.
35
00:04:24,514 --> 00:04:26,515
He stands there
with a look of disapproval.
36
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:29,518
Just over some stupid camp game.
37
00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:33,522
I won't allow my son to let
anything like that happen to him.
38
00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:37,150
He will know I love and support him
no matter what.
39
00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:41,196
Good. Then you can love
and support him going to camp.
40
00:04:41,364 --> 00:04:43,657
You didn't hear what I just said?
41
00:04:43,825 --> 00:04:48,453
Yes, I did, and he's not you, and
you definitely are not your father.
42
00:04:49,706 --> 00:04:52,541
Oh, and you're driving them.
43
00:05:11,060 --> 00:05:13,020
There it is. Camp Canola.
44
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,816
You don't want to
go to rival Canola.
45
00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,568
But that's where everyone goes.
46
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:22,904
No, if you Wanna go to camp,
you wanna go to Driftwood.
47
00:05:23,072 --> 00:05:25,324
Yeah, Camp Canola's
some rundown shack
48
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:27,242
on a piece of swamp land.
49
00:05:45,261 --> 00:05:47,763
At least, it used to be.
50
00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:56,438
Cool.
Awesome.
51
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,658
It's a lake.
I don't remember a lake.
52
00:06:13,289 --> 00:06:15,207
Well, this ain't nothing.
53
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,292
Wait till you see
where you are going.
54
00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:18,794
Camp Driftwood.
55
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:33,475
What the heck?
56
00:06:40,316 --> 00:06:43,318
Yeah, well, you're crazy, Morty.
That's the best offer
57
00:06:43,486 --> 00:06:45,654
you're ever gonna get
for this craphole.
58
00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:49,991
I'm doing you a favour, butthead.
You're crazy, Morty.
59
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,829
Are you folks lost?
No, we're here to check out the camp.
60
00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:58,333
You want to bring your kids here?
61
00:07:01,337 --> 00:07:04,089
That's beautiful.
62
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:05,882
Yeah.
63
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,804
Hey, good luck with that.
64
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,396
Okay, kids, come on.
65
00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,815
Didn't you hear? Camp's closed.
66
00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,108
Yes.
Yes.
67
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:26,153
What happened?
This place used to be the best.
68
00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:30,031
Well, now seems like everybody
wants newer, better
69
00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:32,701
properly licensed and bonded.
70
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:36,204
They want Camp Canola
down the road.
71
00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:37,873
You guys went to Driftwood?
72
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,708
Yeah, we were here
when we were kids.
73
00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:44,212
Then you know. This place really
used to be something special.
74
00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:48,383
And Canola Was a dump.
Then some rich family bought it
75
00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:52,345
eventually turned it over
to that mutant son of theirs.
76
00:07:52,513 --> 00:07:54,264
What's gonna happen to Driftwood?
77
00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:57,726
Well, soon I'm gonna have no choice
but to sell it to Canola.
78
00:07:57,894 --> 00:08:02,397
It's a pity. Because all he Wants
to do is bulldoze over it.
79
00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:03,899
Can you believe it?
80
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:07,861
That kid has been a pain in my heinie
since he won the '77 Olympiad.
81
00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:12,574
I just hate to give that jerk
Lance Warner the satisfaction.
82
00:08:14,952 --> 00:08:16,077
Warner? Lance Warner?
83
00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,246
He wants to buy this camp
and tear it down?
84
00:08:18,414 --> 00:08:19,456
Our camp?
85
00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:21,082
You bought a What?
86
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:24,085
Not the whole camp, a partnership
with the original owner.
87
00:08:24,253 --> 00:08:26,922
I know the day care centre
has been successful
88
00:08:27,089 --> 00:08:29,508
but you've spent a lot
fixing this house up
89
00:08:29,675 --> 00:08:31,009
to accommodate more kids.
90
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,429
The Daddy Day Care brand
means a lot in this town.
91
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:37,432
Re-purposing that brand into summer
is just smart business.
92
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,184
Do you know how to run a camp?
93
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:42,812
That's just it. I'm not gonna run
the camp, Uncle Morty is.
94
00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:44,773
Phil and I are just gonna help out.
95
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,275
So I'll spend as much time
with Ben as possible.
96
00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:48,944
But you hate the outdoors.
97
00:08:49,111 --> 00:08:53,114
Yes, but I hate Lance Warner more.
No way my son's going to his camp.
98
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:56,952
Please just send him to Canola.
That's where all his friends are.
99
00:08:57,119 --> 00:08:58,245
No. No way.
100
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:05,293
Listen, my father sent me to camp
and it didn't go so great. Okay?
101
00:09:05,461 --> 00:09:08,964
Maybe I can give Ben
the positive experience I never had.
102
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:14,135
Just promise me you'll let
103
00:09:14,303 --> 00:09:16,805
this Uncle Morty do
the real outdoorsy stuff.
104
00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:18,974
I don't wanna have to send
a search party
105
00:09:19,141 --> 00:09:21,643
to come rescue your lost butt
in the woods.
106
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:29,401
Come on, Sally, now,
don't play hard to get.
107
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:30,986
Oh, you little tease.
108
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:33,655
Oh, you I've gotcha.
109
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,910
It's another beautiful
woodchuck day, baby.
110
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,830
Hey, that's great.
You remember the old cheer.
111
00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:45,667
I can't thank you guys enough.
I mean, you saved the old place.
112
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,503
Yeah, well, with your help,
I'll show that Lance Warner
113
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:50,797
how to run a good
old-fashioned summer camp.
114
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:53,258
Swell. I'll see you guys
in September.
115
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,467
Say what, now?
116
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,012
Uncle Morty?
117
00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:01,850
Excuse me. Morty, you can't leave.
118
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:05,103
You're supposed to be overseeing
the camp. We're partners.
119
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,522
I've been Watching over this camp
for 30 years.
120
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:10,358
It's time I took a
vacation, partner.
121
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:12,694
Don't worry.
Dale here will show you the ropes.
122
00:10:12,862 --> 00:10:16,865
He's the best counselor I got.
No, Morty, wait. You can't leave.
123
00:10:17,658 --> 00:10:19,701
Wait. Come back.
124
00:10:28,502 --> 00:10:31,004
What was that about?
125
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:33,340
This is my first day.
126
00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:49,981
Charles Hinton?
127
00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:53,193
I'm Charlie.
I'm from FMJ Bank.
128
00:10:53,986 --> 00:10:56,446
No doubt your uncle Morty
informed you of the liens
129
00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:59,366
we have against your property.
Informed?
130
00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:01,576
He just took his little fishy
up the road.
131
00:11:01,744 --> 00:11:03,244
As the business has no clients
132
00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:05,538
therefore no discernible
means of income
133
00:11:05,706 --> 00:11:08,792
the bank Will have no choice
but to foreclose on the property.
134
00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:10,085
Foreclose?
Foreclose?
135
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:13,421
Let me ask you something.
136
00:11:13,589 --> 00:11:16,549
What if this camp could show
discernible means of income?
137
00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:18,551
Continue.
138
00:11:18,719 --> 00:11:21,096
We have run
the Daddy Day Care Center
139
00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:23,264
successfully
for the past several years.
140
00:11:23,432 --> 00:11:26,101
Allow us to use the hard-earned
trust that name brings
141
00:11:26,268 --> 00:11:27,769
to build in new clientele.
142
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:30,563
I suppose I could recommend
to the bank
143
00:11:30,731 --> 00:11:33,608
that We extend the debt
for about a month.
144
00:11:33,776 --> 00:11:36,236
Assuming, of course'
that you can maintain the camp
145
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,697
and a client base
of at least 30 children.
146
00:11:39,323 --> 00:11:41,616
We'll have it in tiptop shape
in no time.
147
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:54,963
Yeah, you got a methane problem,
all right.
148
00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:57,298
Gonna have to have
that baby pumped.
149
00:11:57,466 --> 00:11:58,633
Oh, crap.
150
00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:01,803
Yeah, you said it. Gonna need
a Whole new septic tank
151
00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:05,473
new plumbing, the works.
Cost you about 14.
152
00:12:05,641 --> 00:12:07,642
Hundred?
Thousand.
153
00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:11,563
You know what?
We'll buy the kids gas masks.
154
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,482
It's your party, pally,
but that methane is dangerous.
155
00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:17,277
You boys best be careful.
156
00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:24,993
Phil.
What? That Wasn't me.
157
00:13:33,896 --> 00:13:35,897
Okay, here's your lunch, sweetie.
158
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:39,067
It's a sugar-free, Wheat-free,
gluten-free, tofu nugget.
159
00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:43,530
You have your Sidekick With text'
GPS locator in case you get lost
160
00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:46,115
and waterproof sunscreen,
in case it gets sunny
161
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:49,244
while it's still raining.
Mother, it's day camp.
162
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:51,412
I'll be seven miles away.
163
00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,706
And home before dinner.
164
00:13:53,874 --> 00:13:55,416
Did you take your Xanax?
165
00:13:57,211 --> 00:13:58,920
I don't wanna go to
camp in the rain.
166
00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:01,256
I wanna stay home
watching nudie flicks.
167
00:14:01,423 --> 00:14:04,425
The brochure said there would
be sun. Please behave yourself.
168
00:14:04,593 --> 00:14:07,595
And for the love of God,
try not to make anyone bleed.
169
00:14:07,763 --> 00:14:10,265
Take your Dramamine now
before you get on the bus
170
00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:12,433
then later if you ride a horse
171
00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:14,936
or anything that bounces
or gently sways.
172
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:18,189
What about my Pepto?
Save that for lunch.
173
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:20,942
And your Beano'
in case you have a snack.
174
00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:43,756
It's another beautiful
woodchuck day.
175
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:52,140
Promise you'll put those games away
and try to be social this summer.
176
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,809
Die, alien scum, die.
177
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:59,397
Carl, please don't let the
other kids tease your brother.
178
00:14:59,857 --> 00:15:01,649
What am I? Dr. Phil?
179
00:15:01,817 --> 00:15:04,986
I've got nothing to work with here.
180
00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:07,488
Archibald Lawrence Mapleton?
181
00:15:07,656 --> 00:15:12,327
Call me, Mullet. Business up front,
party in the back, baby.
182
00:15:12,494 --> 00:15:14,329
Juliette Stone?
183
00:15:14,496 --> 00:15:16,664
Present.
184
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,835
Holy Hogwarts.
185
00:15:21,503 --> 00:15:25,340
Watch the merchandise, dude.
186
00:15:45,194 --> 00:15:49,739
I still got it, huh?
I can't hear! My ears!
187
00:15:53,702 --> 00:15:58,331
Okay, this is it. Time to give them
a summer they'll never forget.
188
00:16:11,553 --> 00:16:13,888
They won't forget that.
189
00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:28,194
Nature walkers, lotion up.
190
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,156
Okay, Robin Hoods, gather around.
191
00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:33,992
Everybody take a bow.
192
00:16:34,159 --> 00:16:35,660
There you go.
193
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,829
There's enough for everyone.
There you go.
194
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:58,099
Hey, Romeo.
If you like her, go in that group.
195
00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:02,103
No. That's okay.
I've only got to kill one more Orc.
196
00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:06,024
Right. Kill your Orc, you dork.
197
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:09,235
Dad, I want to be
in the group With Max.
198
00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:12,405
I'm older than these babies.
I should be in that group.
199
00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:15,116
I didn't sign up to
be with no skirts.
200
00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:16,576
They got cooties.
201
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:18,286
There's no such thing as cooties.
202
00:17:18,454 --> 00:17:21,414
It's simply a term used to express
age-appropriate discomfort
203
00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:23,458
of those not of our gender.
204
00:17:34,803 --> 00:17:36,054
Stop arguing.
205
00:17:40,976 --> 00:17:43,269
You wanted to accommodate children
of all ages.
206
00:17:43,437 --> 00:17:45,438
Well, at this point,
we can't be too picky.
207
00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:55,782
Look, here we have grass.
Some grass and a big rock.
208
00:17:55,949 --> 00:17:57,617
How many more to go?
209
00:17:57,785 --> 00:18:01,287
Everybody gather round. Get in here.
210
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,957
Can anyone tell me
what kind of tree this is?
211
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,126
An oak?
212
00:18:07,294 --> 00:18:09,962
Yeah. Sure. Okay.
213
00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:13,466
Look over here, some berries'
maybe a strawberry thing.
214
00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:15,968
I wouldn't eat them, though.
Watch out.
215
00:18:16,136 --> 00:18:20,306
Poison ivy. Keep moving, slowly,
behind the bush.
216
00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,642
Come on, slowly. Don't touch it.
217
00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:25,478
Careful, careful. Okay.
218
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:29,482
That would be a leaf.
219
00:18:30,651 --> 00:18:32,652
Ready. Aim.
220
00:18:32,820 --> 00:18:35,113
Wait. There's a bunny.
221
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,323
We can't shoot with a bunny
in the field.
222
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:39,659
He's way oft to the side.
You'll never hit it.
223
00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:42,495
Yes, we can. That's good eating.
224
00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:43,955
No, it's not.
225
00:18:45,499 --> 00:18:48,960
Wait. All right, kids, hang on.
Back up.
226
00:18:51,004 --> 00:18:53,005
So the rebel Borg rogue vessel
227
00:18:53,173 --> 00:18:55,675
circles around Barkon IV
228
00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:58,636
loops over the Enterprise
and doubles back
229
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:00,721
through the space nebula.
230
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,689
We passed this tree twice already.
231
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:13,901
Because it's a very important tree
and I wanted to emphasize it.
232
00:19:14,069 --> 00:19:15,528
We're not lost.
233
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:20,074
Alligator.
Calm down. Stop. Calm down.
234
00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:23,035
Stop.
235
00:19:23,203 --> 00:19:26,080
We don't have alligators
on the nature hike.
236
00:19:26,248 --> 00:19:27,915
It's not that good a camp.
237
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:31,752
See, kids?
Everything's gonna be just fine.
238
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:33,004
Air varmint.
239
00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:47,018
I appreciate that you kids
are such quick learners
240
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:51,439
but these knots are not supposed
to be used for evil.
241
00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:55,818
See? Just a big, dumb empty log.
242
00:19:57,446 --> 00:20:00,239
Bees. Scatter.
243
00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:16,088
Now put two thumbs up.
244
00:20:16,256 --> 00:20:18,799
You guys, two, three'
or four of you are out
245
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:21,093
because I didn't
say, Simon says.
246
00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:23,095
All right, Simon Says.
247
00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:26,599
Ben. Hey, Ben.
248
00:20:27,935 --> 00:20:30,645
Simon says, Wave at Daddy.
249
00:20:33,148 --> 00:20:36,067
Good concentration, son.
You know, because I'm not Simon.
250
00:20:37,110 --> 00:20:39,111
Good job, Dale.
251
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,582
Oh, no, so many are out right now,
I can't even count how many.
252
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:59,632
Can I help you?
Felix.
253
00:21:00,842 --> 00:21:04,804
Simon Says. A classic.
254
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:08,975
I was showing the kids here
255
00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:10,893
where the go-cart
track will be
256
00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:14,188
once you and your team of idiots
run your camp into the ground.
257
00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:17,692
First of all, it's not for sale.
258
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:20,653
Yeah, well, from What I heard,
that may not be up to you.
259
00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:24,156
Yeah, a little something
called foreclosure.
260
00:21:24,324 --> 00:21:26,450
Axe coming down.
261
00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:29,662
See all those kids
running around down there?
262
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:32,707
Does that look like
a business in trouble?
263
00:21:32,874 --> 00:21:34,959
It's only day one, buddy boy.
264
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:39,171
Once all those kids see how much fun
we're having at Camp Canola
265
00:21:39,339 --> 00:21:42,383
they'll be jumping ship
like harbour rats.
266
00:21:47,347 --> 00:21:48,889
And to make matters worse
267
00:21:49,057 --> 00:21:53,227
you will never be able
to beat the Chief in the Olympiad.
268
00:21:53,395 --> 00:21:55,646
That's him. He's the Chief.
269
00:21:55,814 --> 00:21:57,732
And you poop in your shorts.
270
00:21:57,899 --> 00:22:00,401
Nice son you got there, Lance.
271
00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,987
He ain't my kid. I hate kids.
272
00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:09,493
First of all, there ain't gonna be
any Olympiad. And secondly
273
00:22:09,661 --> 00:22:12,580
I care about building these
kids up, not tearing them down
274
00:22:12,748 --> 00:22:14,749
with some futile attempt
at competition.
275
00:22:15,542 --> 00:22:17,043
That's pathetic.
276
00:22:17,210 --> 00:22:19,754
You won't last a month.
277
00:22:19,921 --> 00:22:23,591
Yeah. Thirty-one days. Or 30.
278
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:26,260
Except for February,
which stands alone.
279
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:30,056
All right, let's go.
280
00:22:33,226 --> 00:22:35,728
Dang, he looks familiar.
281
00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:40,316
All right, Camp Canola.
282
00:22:40,734 --> 00:22:42,360
Let's head out.
283
00:22:51,244 --> 00:22:53,537
Wait. Oh, good Lord.
284
00:22:55,749 --> 00:22:59,085
Watch and learn.
285
00:23:03,799 --> 00:23:07,301
Mullet. Come on.
Hurry up.
286
00:23:07,469 --> 00:23:10,054
I want candy.
287
00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:37,957
Dale, make sure
you count them twice.
288
00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:41,544
Everybody on the
Hey, no fighting.
289
00:23:42,921 --> 00:23:45,589
On the bus. Get on the bus.
290
00:23:49,177 --> 00:23:52,304
Oh, thank God.
291
00:23:52,472 --> 00:23:57,476
See? This is exactly
where I thought we'd come out.
292
00:23:57,811 --> 00:24:00,980
Get down to the bus.
It'll be leaving any second.
293
00:24:01,148 --> 00:24:03,149
I've gotta drop the kids oft
at the pool.
294
00:24:03,316 --> 00:24:04,358
We have a pool?
295
00:24:04,943 --> 00:24:06,652
No.
296
00:24:09,489 --> 00:24:11,866
This is the worst camp ever.
297
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,327
Thanks for coming.
298
00:24:17,873 --> 00:24:20,040
No, no, Max.
All right, no, Max, Max.
299
00:24:21,168 --> 00:24:25,171
Okay, off the bus.
Everybody off the bus.
300
00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:29,383
Yes, off the bus. Okay. Okay. Relax.
301
00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:32,803
What's wrong with him?
302
00:24:32,971 --> 00:24:36,223
He was born with no sense of smell.
303
00:24:37,726 --> 00:24:38,976
What's his problem?
304
00:24:39,144 --> 00:24:41,896
Mayhoffer's gonna blow.
What?
305
00:24:57,037 --> 00:25:00,039
Phil, we got a situation here.
I need help.
306
00:25:00,207 --> 00:25:03,876
I need backup.
I repeat, backup for
307
00:25:09,257 --> 00:25:11,550
All right.
308
00:25:18,767 --> 00:25:21,894
Code blue. Code blue, Phil.
309
00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:28,692
What else could go wrong?
No, please
310
00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:48,754
I think We're gonna need
more toilet paper.
311
00:25:56,096 --> 00:25:57,763
Baby
312
00:25:57,931 --> 00:26:01,600
it's just not your
area of expertise.
313
00:26:01,768 --> 00:26:04,228
You need someone
with more outdoor experience.
314
00:26:04,396 --> 00:26:06,605
Someone like your father.
315
00:26:06,773 --> 00:26:07,982
You're gonna call Grandpa?
316
00:26:08,149 --> 00:26:11,485
No. Mommy's just making a joke.
317
00:26:11,653 --> 00:26:13,153
I don't need Buck.
318
00:26:13,321 --> 00:26:16,782
Kids all over town are bathing
in tomato juice, thanks to you.
319
00:26:16,950 --> 00:26:20,119
It was one lousy skunk
and a harmless methane explosion.
320
00:26:20,287 --> 00:26:21,787
Your father's a military man.
321
00:26:21,955 --> 00:26:25,124
You told me yourself Buck knows
everything about the outdoors.
322
00:26:25,292 --> 00:26:28,002
Roughing it, managing troops,
survival skills.
323
00:26:28,169 --> 00:26:31,505
Yeah, and he realizes it through
anger, shaming, and criticism.
324
00:26:31,673 --> 00:26:33,632
Here, baby, sponge yourself.
325
00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:37,595
Look, I know that you two have had
your problems.
326
00:26:37,762 --> 00:26:39,138
Problems? No.
327
00:26:39,306 --> 00:26:42,433
Nothing I ever did was good enough,
including sports, school, work.
328
00:26:42,601 --> 00:26:44,143
But other than that?
329
00:26:44,519 --> 00:26:47,187
He could help' and Ben would
be thrilled to see him.
330
00:26:47,355 --> 00:26:49,690
I think it's time you
give him a chance.
331
00:26:49,858 --> 00:26:53,819
Look, baby, this is my thing, okay?
I'll handle it.
332
00:26:53,987 --> 00:26:57,156
Phil and I got special
camp consultants coming tomorrow.
333
00:26:57,324 --> 00:26:59,533
It's a fresh start and a new day.
334
00:26:59,701 --> 00:27:01,368
Consultants?
335
00:27:01,536 --> 00:27:02,661
Yes.
336
00:27:02,829 --> 00:27:07,333
It's all right here in our Idea Binders.
That's for you.
337
00:27:07,500 --> 00:27:10,169
You just trust us.
338
00:27:10,337 --> 00:27:13,339
Syl. Come to me.
I'm right here.
339
00:27:13,506 --> 00:27:15,174
Be with me, think with me.
340
00:27:15,342 --> 00:27:17,718
We could have
this entire area carpeted.
341
00:27:17,886 --> 00:27:19,553
Shag carpet.
342
00:27:19,721 --> 00:27:21,847
Like a child, a universe grows.
343
00:27:28,188 --> 00:27:29,730
That was a Waste of time.
344
00:27:29,898 --> 00:27:33,025
Hey, don't worry. When those
35 kids get off that bus
345
00:27:33,193 --> 00:27:36,362
we're gonna show them adventure,
Charlie and Phil style.
346
00:27:48,375 --> 00:27:52,836
Okay. See, Phil, it's all we needed.
A new day, fresh start.
347
00:27:55,006 --> 00:27:56,757
Way to go, Dad.
348
00:27:56,925 --> 00:27:59,093
What?
349
00:28:03,723 --> 00:28:07,267
That's all we got. The other parents
are demanding a full refund.
350
00:28:08,687 --> 00:28:11,063
Let's go this way, guys.
351
00:28:18,571 --> 00:28:20,322
We only got seven kids left, Phil.
352
00:28:20,490 --> 00:28:22,408
There's no other Way
to cover these bills.
353
00:28:22,575 --> 00:28:24,326
We can't afford to
hire consultants
354
00:28:24,494 --> 00:28:26,412
much less make
the foreclosure payment.
355
00:28:26,579 --> 00:28:30,582
We can't even afford to give refunds.
That money went back into repairs.
356
00:28:30,750 --> 00:28:32,918
You're gonna have
to swallow your pride
357
00:28:33,086 --> 00:28:35,421
and get a man in here
to help run this camp.
358
00:28:40,051 --> 00:28:43,554
Historically'
the art of using troops is this:
359
00:28:43,722 --> 00:28:47,057
When ten to the enemy's one'
surround them with tanks.
360
00:28:47,225 --> 00:28:50,394
At five times the strength,
you attack With air strikes.
361
00:28:50,562 --> 00:28:54,231
Napoleon: All manoeuvres were
on horseback.
362
00:28:54,399 --> 00:28:57,568
Saladin: Camels
363
00:28:58,903 --> 00:29:01,071
Colonel here.
364
00:29:02,073 --> 00:29:04,241
Just a sec.
365
00:29:04,743 --> 00:29:07,035
Civilians, you're dismissed.
366
00:29:15,086 --> 00:29:17,629
That's better. How can I help you?
367
00:29:17,797 --> 00:29:20,424
No, no. No, the time is fine.
368
00:29:25,764 --> 00:29:27,514
You don't say?
369
00:29:27,682 --> 00:29:31,185
And that's how you treat
an acute poison ivy breakout.
370
00:29:32,604 --> 00:29:35,522
I'd like to apologise to you guys
for letting you play
371
00:29:35,690 --> 00:29:37,441
in what I thought was clover.
372
00:29:37,609 --> 00:29:41,320
Jack, I wouldn't go number two
for a few weeks if I were you.
373
00:29:41,488 --> 00:29:44,031
I think you used that clover
for toilet paper.
374
00:29:45,700 --> 00:29:47,701
If you'd all sign these waivers
375
00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:50,204
acknowledging you've been briefed
on safety
376
00:29:50,371 --> 00:29:53,123
Here you go. Okay.
Excuse me.
377
00:29:53,291 --> 00:29:55,292
With the exception
of emancipated minors
378
00:29:55,460 --> 00:29:57,795
I don't believe
that a personal injury waiver
379
00:29:57,962 --> 00:30:01,298
with confidentiality clause'
executed by a child
380
00:30:01,466 --> 00:30:03,884
is a legally binding document'
Uncle Phil.
381
00:30:05,053 --> 00:30:07,304
It's a raid.
382
00:30:09,682 --> 00:30:11,642
Camp Canola!
383
00:30:29,828 --> 00:30:32,037
Get the flag.
384
00:30:55,228 --> 00:30:57,271
I can use the second mortgage
on the house
385
00:30:57,438 --> 00:30:59,898
to pay off the
bills for the camp?
386
00:31:00,066 --> 00:31:03,569
Great. No, Mr. Thumson,
I don't need you to come out here.
387
00:31:03,736 --> 00:31:06,405
No, business is fine. It's just
388
00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:08,740
You know,
we have such a full house.
389
00:31:14,914 --> 00:31:16,915
Can I call you back?
390
00:31:24,257 --> 00:31:26,133
What the heck is going on here?
391
00:31:46,237 --> 00:31:48,614
Open your ear-holes, dweebers.
392
00:31:48,781 --> 00:31:53,285
We, the mighty troops of Fort
Canola, have braved hill and dale
393
00:31:53,453 --> 00:31:55,454
so that we may find
394
00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:59,333
who are the greatest warriors
in the land.
395
00:32:01,628 --> 00:32:04,755
No. No. No way.
396
00:32:04,923 --> 00:32:06,673
You are Way out of line, Lance.
397
00:32:06,841 --> 00:32:08,467
Behold!
398
00:32:11,304 --> 00:32:13,472
This spear of honour
399
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:17,976
garnished with
the flame of truth.
400
00:32:19,562 --> 00:32:21,730
Now, I challenge ye
401
00:32:21,898 --> 00:32:26,860
to the XLV Annual
Intercamp Olympiad.
402
00:32:28,863 --> 00:32:32,032
That's the 37th Olympiad to you,
pea brain.
403
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:33,492
Forty-fifth.
404
00:32:33,660 --> 00:32:37,037
I told you before, there isn't going
to be any competition.
405
00:32:38,665 --> 00:32:42,376
Well, then let the
onslaught continue.
406
00:33:07,568 --> 00:33:11,905
Now's your chance.
Go say something.
407
00:33:15,910 --> 00:33:18,245
Do you like World of Warcraft?
408
00:33:18,413 --> 00:33:19,579
World of what?
409
00:33:21,082 --> 00:33:23,917
I'm a Level 40 Blood Elf Druid.
410
00:33:24,085 --> 00:33:27,087
I have absolutely no idea
what you're talking about.
411
00:33:29,590 --> 00:33:30,924
Goodbye.
412
00:33:31,092 --> 00:33:34,594
I like causing destruction'
not cleaning up after it.
413
00:33:34,762 --> 00:33:38,432
Is that why you threw a paint grenade
at your own campmate during a raid?
414
00:33:38,599 --> 00:33:42,602
What can I say?
War is hell, skunk-boy.
415
00:33:43,730 --> 00:33:50,235
Fight. Fight. Fight.
416
00:33:50,403 --> 00:33:53,697
Cut it out. Stop it. Stop fighting.
417
00:33:55,033 --> 00:33:57,117
A ten-hut.
418
00:34:00,788 --> 00:34:03,707
I see this unit's
morale is flagging.
419
00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:06,543
There is only one solution for that.
420
00:34:06,711 --> 00:34:09,796
All of those who are my grandson'
front and centre.
421
00:34:09,964 --> 00:34:12,632
Come here, you little peanut.
Grandpa Buck.
422
00:34:14,886 --> 00:34:16,303
Do you remember this manoeuvre?
423
00:34:16,471 --> 00:34:18,138
Sneak attack at tickle point.
424
00:34:23,603 --> 00:34:27,272
Everyone, this is my father,
Colonel Buck Hinton.
425
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,650
Reporting for duty, corporal.
Please don't call me that.
426
00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:34,988
All right, then, private.
427
00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:40,786
Gentlemen. Ladies.
What I just witnessed was a mutiny.
428
00:34:40,953 --> 00:34:43,163
Among campers'
that is unacceptable
429
00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:45,957
from this point forward.
430
00:34:46,667 --> 00:34:47,709
Now
431
00:34:47,877 --> 00:34:49,961
front and centre. Double time.
432
00:34:50,129 --> 00:34:53,298
I'll make you soldiers
if it's the last thing I do.
433
00:34:53,466 --> 00:34:57,302
No, wait a minute. There is no
mutiny. Everything is under control.
434
00:34:57,470 --> 00:34:58,804
This is not why I called you.
435
00:34:59,972 --> 00:35:04,309
Why the misconduct, soldier?
We got raided by Camp Canola.
436
00:35:04,477 --> 00:35:07,646
Yeah.
Sneak attack, huh?
437
00:35:07,814 --> 00:35:09,231
Well, I'm sorry, private.
438
00:35:09,398 --> 00:35:11,149
We should be planning
a counterattack.
439
00:35:11,317 --> 00:35:14,653
Meet force With force.
I say we hit them at nightfall.
440
00:35:14,821 --> 00:35:17,697
Yeah.
No. No.
441
00:35:17,865 --> 00:35:20,492
Driftwood Day Camp.
442
00:35:20,660 --> 00:35:22,994
Hit them at 5,
when the sun's in their eyes.
443
00:35:23,162 --> 00:35:24,663
Yeah.
444
00:35:24,831 --> 00:35:26,623
Okay, guys.
445
00:35:26,791 --> 00:35:29,668
Guys, can you excuse us
for a minute?
446
00:35:33,005 --> 00:35:35,132
This is not a boot camp. All right?
447
00:35:35,299 --> 00:35:38,009
We're not looking for Colonel
Hinton' war games consultant.
448
00:35:38,177 --> 00:35:41,012
We're looking for Colonel Hinton'
experienced team builder
449
00:35:41,180 --> 00:35:43,682
slash King of the Outdoors.
450
00:35:43,850 --> 00:35:46,393
We're not trying to turn these kids
into Marines.
451
00:35:49,063 --> 00:35:50,730
What's wrong with being a Marine?
452
00:35:52,316 --> 00:35:54,359
Maybe if you had enlisted
453
00:35:54,527 --> 00:35:58,738
you could work yourself out of a jam
instead of calling in reinforcements.
454
00:35:58,906 --> 00:36:01,408
Listen. Yes, I do appreciate
your coming.
455
00:36:01,576 --> 00:36:03,034
Yes, we do need your help.
456
00:36:03,202 --> 00:36:06,830
But We don't want to get into
this thing with Camp Canola.
457
00:36:07,874 --> 00:36:10,083
No war games?
No.
458
00:36:10,251 --> 00:36:11,585
Hand-to-hand combat?
459
00:36:14,547 --> 00:36:16,756
Guerrilla warfare?
No war.
460
00:36:16,924 --> 00:36:18,049
No war.
461
00:36:18,217 --> 00:36:20,886
Just help us run Driftwood,
all right?
462
00:36:21,053 --> 00:36:22,721
Can you follow those orders, Dad?
463
00:36:24,390 --> 00:36:27,100
That's colonel to you, private.
464
00:36:29,562 --> 00:36:30,937
Line up.
465
00:36:59,091 --> 00:37:01,927
In through the nose.
466
00:37:02,094 --> 00:37:05,096
Out through the mouth.
467
00:37:05,973 --> 00:37:09,434
In through the nose.
468
00:37:11,646 --> 00:37:14,981
Out through the mouth.
469
00:37:15,775 --> 00:37:18,068
The samurai warrior meditates
470
00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:23,615
to blend mind
and body into harmony.
471
00:37:31,457 --> 00:37:33,416
Come here. Come to me.
472
00:37:33,584 --> 00:37:36,711
Hey! Hey!
473
00:37:37,463 --> 00:37:41,341
Hey, old man, what's with the séance
in the middle of our off-road track?
474
00:37:41,509 --> 00:37:44,469
What? Get them out of here!
475
00:37:44,637 --> 00:37:47,472
Get your kids out of here!
Get them out of here!
476
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:49,975
Somebody's gonna get hurt!
477
00:37:53,145 --> 00:37:55,689
Relax, General Depends.
478
00:37:56,941 --> 00:37:59,192
Shouldn't you be
in some bingo game or something?
479
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:02,862
L-27. G-13.
480
00:38:03,030 --> 00:38:05,657
All right, boys.
Let's move them out.
481
00:38:05,825 --> 00:38:10,370
B-7.
G-40.
482
00:38:10,538 --> 00:38:12,539
That tears it.
483
00:38:13,332 --> 00:38:16,001
Rules of engagement
484
00:38:17,003 --> 00:38:19,546
been overruled.
485
00:38:28,514 --> 00:38:32,851
There's the objective.
Anyone unclear on their role?
486
00:38:33,019 --> 00:38:34,352
No, sir.
487
00:38:34,520 --> 00:38:37,689
Anyone wanna go home?
No, sir.
488
00:38:37,857 --> 00:38:42,193
Operation MoonPie is a go.
489
00:38:48,909 --> 00:38:50,952
It's right up here.
490
00:38:52,038 --> 00:38:54,456
You know, I've never been up here.
491
00:39:10,890 --> 00:39:14,851
Help. Help. Come on, y'all.
Give me a lift. Come on, please.
492
00:39:17,897 --> 00:39:19,898
Go, go.
493
00:39:30,910 --> 00:39:34,954
Where is it? Where is it?
I know that loser from somewhere.
494
00:39:36,248 --> 00:39:38,583
Where is it?
495
00:39:43,089 --> 00:39:45,090
Jackpot.
496
00:39:48,260 --> 00:39:50,929
Charlie Hinton.
497
00:39:56,310 --> 00:39:57,727
Can I help you?
498
00:39:57,895 --> 00:40:00,271
Hi, my name's Becca.
I'm Juliette.
499
00:40:00,439 --> 00:40:01,981
And we've come to offer you
500
00:40:02,149 --> 00:40:04,150
the Driftwood
Olive Branch of Peace.
501
00:40:04,318 --> 00:40:05,985
In exchange for our friendship
502
00:40:06,153 --> 00:40:08,446
all we ask is
that you return our flag.
503
00:40:11,617 --> 00:40:14,285
Did big bad Charlie send
his little bitty girls
504
00:40:14,453 --> 00:40:17,080
to do his bidding for him, huh?
505
00:40:17,248 --> 00:40:19,958
Let's put it this way:
Either you give it back
506
00:40:20,126 --> 00:40:22,335
or we take it.
507
00:40:22,503 --> 00:40:25,171
You and what army, Petunia?
508
00:40:25,798 --> 00:40:27,173
You had to ask.
509
00:40:31,804 --> 00:40:33,972
Ask What?
510
00:40:40,187 --> 00:40:41,563
What the?
511
00:40:49,864 --> 00:40:50,905
Get him.
512
00:40:51,115 --> 00:40:54,033
You're messing With Lance Warner.
513
00:41:01,667 --> 00:41:03,668
Stuck.
514
00:41:15,389 --> 00:41:16,473
Yes.
515
00:41:18,392 --> 00:41:19,893
Hey, Warner.
516
00:41:26,066 --> 00:41:28,318
Yes.
That's my boy.
517
00:41:28,486 --> 00:41:30,904
Sound the alarm. Red alert.
518
00:41:31,071 --> 00:41:34,574
We're under attack.
This is not a drill, people.
519
00:41:34,742 --> 00:41:38,703
Everyone to your stations!
Security's been breached!
520
00:41:38,871 --> 00:41:41,247
The perimeter's
been compromised!
521
00:41:41,415 --> 00:41:43,583
Lock the gates! Call my dad!
522
00:41:48,047 --> 00:41:50,256
Hey, Dale, you seen Buck?
523
00:41:50,424 --> 00:41:52,550
Supposed to be back
with the kids an hour ago.
524
00:41:52,718 --> 00:41:54,219
I wouldn't sweat it.
525
00:41:54,386 --> 00:41:58,723
Your dad's like
the most responsible guy I ever met.
526
00:41:59,391 --> 00:42:02,101
Yeah, you're probably right.
527
00:42:05,731 --> 00:42:08,733
Get back here, you little rodents.
528
00:42:08,901 --> 00:42:10,193
Come on. Come on.
529
00:42:10,361 --> 00:42:15,114
No! No, no, no.
Give me my pants back.
530
00:42:15,282 --> 00:42:16,449
Here's your diaper.
531
00:42:17,910 --> 00:42:20,078
Clean yourself off.
532
00:42:21,956 --> 00:42:23,373
Move out.
533
00:42:26,085 --> 00:42:30,755
Let go. Get back here, you cowards.
534
00:42:30,923 --> 00:42:34,092
No one messes With Lance Warner,
you hear me?
535
00:42:34,260 --> 00:42:36,594
No one.
536
00:42:58,659 --> 00:43:00,577
G. I. Joe is turning red.
537
00:43:00,744 --> 00:43:02,662
Someone farted on his head.
538
00:43:02,830 --> 00:43:04,789
G. I. Joe is turning pink.
539
00:43:04,957 --> 00:43:06,791
Someone puked in the kitchen sink.
540
00:43:06,959 --> 00:43:08,751
G. I. Joe is turning white.
541
00:43:09,211 --> 00:43:11,129
The zippers on his pants
are really tight.
542
00:43:11,297 --> 00:43:13,131
G.I. Joe is turning blue.
543
00:43:13,299 --> 00:43:15,300
There are peanuts in his poo.
544
00:43:15,467 --> 00:43:17,677
Company, halt.
545
00:43:17,845 --> 00:43:19,178
Where have you guys been?
546
00:43:19,346 --> 00:43:21,889
Your nature hike was supposed
to be back an hour ago.
547
00:43:22,516 --> 00:43:24,350
Present colours.
548
00:43:30,858 --> 00:43:32,775
You didn't?
Yes, sir.
549
00:43:33,611 --> 00:43:35,320
Robert, what happened
to your head?
550
00:43:35,487 --> 00:43:38,114
It's just a battle wound.
551
00:43:39,617 --> 00:43:41,701
Dale, go get the first-aid kit.
552
00:43:41,869 --> 00:43:44,787
You take these kids off our premises
without permission slips
553
00:43:44,955 --> 00:43:46,497
and bring them back like this?
554
00:43:46,874 --> 00:43:48,207
Affirmative.
555
00:43:48,375 --> 00:43:50,960
See, this is exactly the thing
I was afraid of.
556
00:43:51,170 --> 00:43:54,547
We restored our honour, Dad.
It was just
557
00:43:57,843 --> 00:44:02,513
What kind of insane militant
nut factory you running here, huh?
558
00:44:02,681 --> 00:44:06,559
Huh, Charlie Hinton?
Driftwood Class of '77.
559
00:44:06,727 --> 00:44:09,062
That's right, I know who you are.
Listen, Lance.
560
00:44:09,229 --> 00:44:11,064
I'm really sorry about this.
In fact
561
00:44:11,231 --> 00:44:14,233
my father and I were just about
to have a discussion about it.
562
00:44:14,401 --> 00:44:16,861
This is your father?
563
00:44:17,696 --> 00:44:20,782
Oh, this is classic. Oh, sure.
564
00:44:20,949 --> 00:44:23,076
The chicken's come home
to roost, huh?
565
00:44:23,243 --> 00:44:26,329
Now I know why you don't want
to compete in the Olympiad.
566
00:44:26,497 --> 00:44:28,748
You're afraid of getting
your butt kicked again
567
00:44:28,916 --> 00:44:30,708
in front of
Lieutenant Prune Juice.
568
00:44:30,876 --> 00:44:32,001
Colonel.
569
00:44:32,169 --> 00:44:34,337
Oh, Colonel. Sorry.
570
00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:38,383
Look, Lance, I'm just trying to teach
these kids about sportsmanship.
571
00:44:38,550 --> 00:44:42,929
No, the only thing you can teach
these kids is how to lose.
572
00:44:43,889 --> 00:44:45,348
Or have you forgotten?
573
00:44:45,641 --> 00:44:49,560
Daddy. Look at me.
574
00:44:58,570 --> 00:45:01,114
I'm a failure.
575
00:45:05,869 --> 00:45:09,288
You know why my parents bought
Camp Canola for me?
576
00:45:09,456 --> 00:45:10,748
No, why?
577
00:45:10,916 --> 00:45:13,918
Because that summer
when I kicked your butt
578
00:45:15,254 --> 00:45:17,630
that was the best moment
of my life.
579
00:45:17,798 --> 00:45:21,092
And now, every day when I wake up,
I get to live that dream.
580
00:45:21,260 --> 00:45:23,636
And it is fantastic.
581
00:45:23,804 --> 00:45:25,972
Peaked when you were 11,
did you, Lance?
582
00:45:26,140 --> 00:45:28,433
See, I get it, Charlie.
583
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:32,145
You don't want your kid
to end up a loser like you.
584
00:45:33,647 --> 00:45:35,815
Like father, like son.
585
00:45:39,737 --> 00:45:41,821
Oh, sure. No, that's cool.
You walk away.
586
00:45:41,989 --> 00:45:44,157
Yeah, because refusing to compete
587
00:45:44,324 --> 00:45:45,950
just proves to the community
588
00:45:46,118 --> 00:45:48,161
which camp they should send
their kids to.
589
00:45:48,328 --> 00:45:50,621
Mine.
590
00:45:51,123 --> 00:45:52,915
Adiós.
591
00:45:58,756 --> 00:46:01,424
What I'd really like to do
is kick your butt.
592
00:46:02,134 --> 00:46:05,636
Being as we're trying to set
a good example here, mister
593
00:46:05,804 --> 00:46:08,014
you got yourself an Olympiad.
594
00:46:08,182 --> 00:46:09,974
Yeah!
595
00:46:10,809 --> 00:46:13,352
Fantastic.
596
00:46:19,318 --> 00:46:20,777
Yeah.
597
00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:23,654
Good, good job.
598
00:46:23,822 --> 00:46:25,406
The great Julius Caesar
once said
599
00:46:25,574 --> 00:46:28,701
You were way out of line
with what you did today.
600
00:46:28,869 --> 00:46:31,537
If we do this, we do it my Way.
You got it?
601
00:46:33,332 --> 00:46:36,334
Affirmative.
Good.
602
00:46:36,502 --> 00:46:40,046
Now. What do you think
we should do?
603
00:46:43,008 --> 00:46:45,343
A sleepover?
604
00:46:45,511 --> 00:46:47,512
I thought the Whole purpose
of day camp
605
00:46:47,679 --> 00:46:50,348
was sending the kids home
at the end of the day.
606
00:46:50,516 --> 00:46:52,892
It was your idea to get
my father involved.
607
00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:55,520
According to Buck,
the best way to build team unity
608
00:46:55,687 --> 00:46:59,190
is to put the kids in a new situation
where they have to work together
609
00:46:59,358 --> 00:47:00,566
to overcome stuff.
610
00:47:00,734 --> 00:47:05,029
Well, I think someone wants
to impress his own father.
611
00:47:05,697 --> 00:47:09,242
Listen, this Olympiad is gonna
be good for business.
612
00:47:09,409 --> 00:47:12,370
Once those Canola parents see
how Well our kids work together
613
00:47:12,538 --> 00:47:14,247
we might drum up new customers.
614
00:47:14,414 --> 00:47:16,874
If you think parents
are gonna switch camps
615
00:47:17,042 --> 00:47:20,211
based off of who Wins
some silly events
616
00:47:20,879 --> 00:47:25,383
Mrs. Hinton?
I'm Edward Thumson from the bank.
617
00:47:27,553 --> 00:47:32,431
Yes, I'm aware of who you are'
but what are you doing in my house?
618
00:47:32,599 --> 00:47:35,059
Is that real Tiffany crystal?
619
00:47:36,061 --> 00:47:37,603
It is standard procedure to do
620
00:47:37,771 --> 00:47:39,939
a pre-inventory
prior to the foreclosure.
621
00:47:40,107 --> 00:47:42,942
But the first installment is not due
until next week.
622
00:47:43,110 --> 00:47:45,069
True. But with only six campers
623
00:47:45,279 --> 00:47:51,242
it is mathematically impossible for
Actually, there's seven campers.
624
00:47:51,410 --> 00:47:55,413
What's going on?
Oh, I'll tell you what's going on.
625
00:47:55,581 --> 00:47:57,582
We overextended ourselves
with the camp.
626
00:47:57,749 --> 00:47:59,792
Now strange men are touching
the furniture
627
00:47:59,960 --> 00:48:01,502
messing With my mama's vase
628
00:48:01,670 --> 00:48:04,130
Mr. Thumson's threatening
to take my house away.
629
00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:06,549
Okay, okay.
630
00:48:06,717 --> 00:48:08,759
I know what I gotta do.
What?
631
00:48:08,927 --> 00:48:11,095
I'll sell the camp.
Listen to me.
632
00:48:11,263 --> 00:48:13,139
If you believe by winning
this Olympiad
633
00:48:13,307 --> 00:48:15,099
more kids will
come to the camp
634
00:48:15,267 --> 00:48:17,894
then you go kick
some Lance Warner butt.
635
00:49:26,463 --> 00:49:29,507
Come on. Come on, soldier.
636
00:49:37,516 --> 00:49:38,849
Yes.
637
00:49:40,310 --> 00:49:41,852
Ben! Hey!
638
00:50:21,893 --> 00:50:24,895
Come on, son.
639
00:50:25,063 --> 00:50:27,064
I know the song.
Well, what?
640
00:50:27,232 --> 00:50:29,734
You don't like being
in the support vehicle with me
641
00:50:29,901 --> 00:50:33,195
instead of out there with poison
ivy, rocks and whatnot? Bugs.
642
00:50:33,363 --> 00:50:38,409
It's supposed to be a hike.
I look like a goober.
643
00:50:38,577 --> 00:50:42,413
Okay. You're right.
644
00:50:45,751 --> 00:50:47,043
Oh, look at her.
645
00:50:48,253 --> 00:50:51,630
She even puts on bug spray
like an angel.
646
00:50:51,798 --> 00:50:55,259
You're pathetic. Go walk With her.
Get your groove on, dude.
647
00:50:55,427 --> 00:50:57,762
What makes you such an expert?
You're only 6.
648
00:50:57,929 --> 00:51:01,766
I know I won't spend
my best years buried in video games.
649
00:51:01,933 --> 00:51:04,310
Shut up. Don't make
650
00:51:08,815 --> 00:51:10,399
Here, buddy.
651
00:51:11,651 --> 00:51:14,820
Stop it. Stop it.
652
00:51:16,031 --> 00:51:20,034
Hey, Billy? What's going on?
653
00:51:20,202 --> 00:51:21,702
Nothing.
654
00:51:21,870 --> 00:51:24,371
No wet willies to dish out?
655
00:51:24,539 --> 00:51:26,957
Maybe you could switch over
to the purple nurple.
656
00:51:27,125 --> 00:51:29,919
No, I already gave one to Mayhoffer.
657
00:51:30,087 --> 00:51:34,423
It's just I don't like
sleepovers. That's all.
658
00:51:34,591 --> 00:51:36,258
And why is that?
659
00:51:38,136 --> 00:51:42,348
Come on, Billy, you can always trust
a fat guy. I won't tell anybody.
660
00:51:42,516 --> 00:51:45,476
Cross my heart, hope to diet.
661
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:49,688
I sometimes wet the bed.
What?
662
00:51:50,690 --> 00:51:52,608
I sometimes wet the bed.
663
00:51:55,403 --> 00:51:57,696
You know what?
664
00:51:57,864 --> 00:52:00,241
I had the same problem
till I was darn near 10.
665
00:52:00,408 --> 00:52:03,536
Really? What did you do
at sleepovers?
666
00:52:03,703 --> 00:52:06,080
An excellent question,
my young friend.
667
00:52:06,248 --> 00:52:08,249
I think you'll be intrigued
by the answer.
668
00:52:15,090 --> 00:52:17,091
Get that equipment up, Brown.
669
00:52:17,259 --> 00:52:19,218
This is dumb.
Why We gotta walk so far?
670
00:52:19,386 --> 00:52:21,637
Far? Halt.
671
00:52:21,805 --> 00:52:24,014
Now you listen up, hippie-hair.
672
00:52:24,182 --> 00:52:26,392
How are you gonna compete
against Camp Canola
673
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:28,727
tomorrow morning
with that kind of attitude?
674
00:52:29,896 --> 00:52:33,482
We have 12 events staring at us
dead in the eye.
675
00:52:33,650 --> 00:52:35,734
We have got to toughen up.
676
00:52:35,902 --> 00:52:39,738
When I was your age, I used to march
six miles into the woods
677
00:52:39,906 --> 00:52:43,826
just to spend the night alone
in a tree. Focus on a goal.
678
00:52:46,413 --> 00:52:48,747
I used to put rocks
in my backpack
679
00:52:48,915 --> 00:52:51,083
just to get stronger.
680
00:52:51,251 --> 00:52:54,920
That's how you grow up to be a man.
Ain't that right, Ben?
681
00:52:55,088 --> 00:52:57,423
All right. Let's head out.
682
00:52:57,591 --> 00:52:59,925
Forward, march.
683
00:53:07,767 --> 00:53:09,768
Hey, Ben.
What are you doing there, son?
684
00:53:09,936 --> 00:53:11,604
Nothing.
685
00:53:21,781 --> 00:53:26,285
I'm so full.
686
00:53:28,288 --> 00:53:30,623
I'm fuller than you.
687
00:53:32,626 --> 00:53:35,127
No one's as full as me.
688
00:53:37,631 --> 00:53:41,300
But now I've got room for dessert.
Who wants s'mores?
689
00:53:44,971 --> 00:53:46,597
Anything I can help you with?
690
00:53:47,641 --> 00:53:49,975
Can't find the chocolate
or the marshmallows.
691
00:53:50,143 --> 00:53:52,978
What are you talking about?
They're in my bag.
692
00:53:55,649 --> 00:53:57,942
Who wants chocolate?
693
00:54:00,320 --> 00:54:02,655
What are we gonna roast?
694
00:54:18,755 --> 00:54:22,258
Nice job, Hinton.
Your dad is such a schwing.
695
00:54:22,425 --> 00:54:24,677
I gotta roast something
with a pit in it.
696
00:54:24,844 --> 00:54:27,846
Shut up. I don't like it
any more than you do.
697
00:54:28,014 --> 00:54:29,306
It's not my fault.
698
00:54:32,727 --> 00:54:34,520
Dude, trust me.
699
00:54:34,688 --> 00:54:38,857
A star-filled sky,
the warm glow of a fire
700
00:54:39,025 --> 00:54:42,027
She'll be like Silly Putty
in your hands.
701
00:54:42,195 --> 00:54:45,030
What makes you such an expert?
702
00:54:45,198 --> 00:54:48,033
Look, you know how grownups
are always saying
703
00:54:48,201 --> 00:54:50,369
they wish they knew then
what they know now?
704
00:54:50,537 --> 00:54:53,789
Yeah.
Well, I know.
705
00:54:53,957 --> 00:54:57,376
How are we ever gonna beat Canola
with runts like you on our team?
706
00:54:57,544 --> 00:55:02,965
Yeah. What you gonna do, tiny?
Bang your pan until they surrender?
707
00:55:09,055 --> 00:55:11,974
I think I burned my banana.
708
00:55:19,065 --> 00:55:21,066
Hello.
Hey.
709
00:55:22,068 --> 00:55:24,320
How are you doing
this fine evening?
710
00:55:24,487 --> 00:55:27,990
Pretty good. Never roasted
a pear before, but it smells good.
711
00:55:28,158 --> 00:55:32,244
Yes, smells are good'
and you, too, smell, Juliette.
712
00:55:32,412 --> 00:55:34,830
I mean, things smell
713
00:55:34,998 --> 00:55:38,083
I mean, good, you smell.
714
00:55:38,251 --> 00:55:41,879
Sorry, it must have been
from the hike, because
715
00:55:42,047 --> 00:55:44,089
No, no, I mean
716
00:55:46,092 --> 00:55:47,217
It's a nice night.
717
00:55:47,385 --> 00:55:51,263
Starry skies, a warm fire.
718
00:55:51,431 --> 00:55:53,432
Good food.
719
00:56:01,441 --> 00:56:02,816
Idiot.
720
00:56:08,573 --> 00:56:11,033
Great place you got there.
What's the mortgage like?
721
00:56:11,201 --> 00:56:12,242
What are you doing?
722
00:56:12,410 --> 00:56:14,411
Sleeping in a hollowed-out log
or something?
723
00:56:14,579 --> 00:56:16,955
It's called camping, private.
You should try it.
724
00:56:17,123 --> 00:56:18,999
Yes, right.
725
00:56:20,085 --> 00:56:24,922
Jack, I think that banana is about
as cooked as it's gonna get there.
726
00:56:25,090 --> 00:56:27,633
It's so slimy.
727
00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:30,427
No, it's roasting. It's supposed
to bring out the flavour.
728
00:56:31,304 --> 00:56:33,806
Try it. You'll like it, I promise.
729
00:56:37,477 --> 00:56:39,812
Good, right?
730
00:56:47,529 --> 00:56:48,987
No!
731
00:56:52,909 --> 00:56:54,368
I'm done with that.
732
00:56:54,994 --> 00:56:56,912
That's nasty.
733
00:56:57,747 --> 00:56:59,748
You feel better?
734
00:57:30,447 --> 00:57:33,115
Sure you're gonna need that, son?
735
00:57:36,619 --> 00:57:39,955
Good Lord's filling the sky
with a million nightlights.
736
00:57:40,707 --> 00:57:41,832
Just for you.
737
00:57:48,089 --> 00:57:51,341
Don't know why you got your panties
in a Wad tonight, Mayhoffer.
738
00:57:51,509 --> 00:57:54,511
We're all getting butt spackled
tomorrow anyways.
739
00:57:54,679 --> 00:57:56,221
What are you talking about?
740
00:57:56,389 --> 00:57:59,725
You don't seriously think we
can beat those rich Canola kids?
741
00:57:59,893 --> 00:58:01,643
Yeah, they're gonna cream us.
742
00:58:01,811 --> 00:58:04,229
Cream? Cream is for coffee.
743
00:58:05,857 --> 00:58:08,066
Okay. Listen up, troops.
744
00:58:09,861 --> 00:58:13,238
It's come to my attention some of you
don't believe we can win tomorrow.
745
00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:15,532
Okay.
746
00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:19,912
Maybe they have fancy equipment.
Gold-plated toilet paper.
747
00:58:20,079 --> 00:58:22,539
But We got something
those snotty-nosed
748
00:58:22,707 --> 00:58:24,750
silver-spoon brats
will never have.
749
00:58:24,918 --> 00:58:28,170
Do you Want to know what that is?
Lice?
750
00:58:28,338 --> 00:58:30,756
Driftwood spirit.
751
00:58:30,924 --> 00:58:32,716
I didn't think you guys had it
752
00:58:32,884 --> 00:58:35,344
but the way you pulled yourselves
together today
753
00:58:35,512 --> 00:58:38,222
made me prouder
than any platoon I've ever led.
754
00:58:40,099 --> 00:58:42,601
We couldn't have done it Without you.
Nonsense.
755
00:58:42,769 --> 00:58:45,562
You couldn't have done it
without this.
756
00:58:45,730 --> 00:58:49,441
Because it's Driftwood Camp spirit
that links us all together
757
00:58:49,609 --> 00:58:51,527
and makes it all possible.
758
00:58:52,278 --> 00:58:55,948
You're not just a bunch of kids
that came together in camp.
759
00:58:56,115 --> 00:58:59,076
You're a team. Team.
760
00:58:59,244 --> 00:59:02,955
Team.
Team.
761
00:59:03,122 --> 00:59:05,958
Team, team, team!
762
00:59:06,125 --> 00:59:07,417
And listen, team.
763
00:59:07,585 --> 00:59:11,296
Tomorrow, you're gonna take
those lobster-eating
764
00:59:11,464 --> 00:59:12,548
Yeah!
765
00:59:12,715 --> 00:59:15,133
those Humvee-driving
Yeah!
766
00:59:15,301 --> 00:59:18,303
Canola cretins and you're gonna
throw them in the dumper.
767
00:59:18,471 --> 00:59:21,014
Yeah!
Yeah!
768
00:59:21,474 --> 00:59:24,226
Yeah!
769
00:59:24,435 --> 00:59:27,980
You don't think you're setting
them up for a pretty big letdown?
770
00:59:28,773 --> 00:59:31,316
Well, in order to win the battle
771
00:59:31,484 --> 00:59:34,987
one must first believe
in the success of the mission.
772
00:59:35,154 --> 00:59:38,323
It's been a long time
since you've been in battle.
773
00:59:39,325 --> 00:59:41,743
A minor technicality.
774
00:59:41,911 --> 00:59:44,830
Hey, have you guys seen Ben?
I can't find him.
775
00:59:46,499 --> 00:59:48,834
Ben?
Ben?
776
00:59:49,002 --> 00:59:50,502
Ben!
Ben?
777
00:59:52,672 --> 00:59:54,631
Ben!
Are you in there?
778
01:00:04,851 --> 01:00:07,352
Ben.
Come out.
779
01:00:10,690 --> 01:00:12,858
Guys, I found him.
780
01:00:13,026 --> 01:00:14,359
Ben.
781
01:00:14,527 --> 01:00:18,697
Ben, get down from there.
What are you doing?
782
01:00:18,865 --> 01:00:23,160
Get down. Where you been, man?
We been looking all over for you.
783
01:00:23,328 --> 01:00:26,872
Listen, don't ever scare me
like that again, you hear me?
784
01:00:27,040 --> 01:00:31,376
I'm okay. I just wanted to be
like Grandpa, that's all.
785
01:00:31,544 --> 01:00:34,880
So you wandered off by yourself?
You know how dangerous that is?
786
01:00:35,048 --> 01:00:37,716
Grandpa said
it's what made him tough
787
01:00:37,884 --> 01:00:40,552
so I thought it'd do
the same for me.
788
01:00:40,720 --> 01:00:42,387
What?
789
01:00:44,849 --> 01:00:47,392
All right, guys, listen up.
Listen to me.
790
01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:50,187
Let me tell you something
about being tough, okay?
791
01:00:50,355 --> 01:00:52,564
Being tough doesn't necessarily
make you a hero.
792
01:00:52,732 --> 01:00:57,402
Sometimes tough people grow up to
be arrogant, selfish and stubborn.
793
01:00:57,570 --> 01:00:59,738
You guys just need to be yourselves.
794
01:00:59,906 --> 01:01:01,740
And know that
by being yourselves
795
01:01:01,908 --> 01:01:03,909
you're gonna be Winners'
no matter what.
796
01:01:04,077 --> 01:01:06,161
Even if we choke like you?
797
01:01:06,329 --> 01:01:09,373
Especially if you choke like me.
798
01:01:09,540 --> 01:01:10,582
Listen.
799
01:01:10,750 --> 01:01:14,252
I want you guys to grow up
to be kind and caring
800
01:01:14,420 --> 01:01:16,922
and accepting of people.
801
01:01:17,090 --> 01:01:19,883
Even if they make mistakes.
802
01:01:20,051 --> 01:01:24,262
So, Ben,
don't try to be so tough, okay?
803
01:01:24,430 --> 01:01:27,766
Just try to be your best.
That's all that matters.
804
01:01:27,934 --> 01:01:29,101
Okay.
Okay?
805
01:01:29,268 --> 01:01:30,519
Okay.
806
01:01:32,438 --> 01:01:35,190
Okay, my little Olympians,
time to rest up for the big day.
807
01:01:35,358 --> 01:01:37,901
Oh, come on.
Come on.
808
01:01:41,280 --> 01:01:43,281
Calling Buck, man,
what Was I thinking?
809
01:01:43,449 --> 01:01:45,450
It's the only way he knows, Charlie.
810
01:01:45,618 --> 01:01:48,620
If that means him jeopardizing
any more kids, he can keep it.
811
01:01:48,788 --> 01:01:52,457
I don't want Ben to grow up
to be anything like my father.
812
01:01:53,793 --> 01:01:56,128
Let's go.
813
01:02:25,658 --> 01:02:27,159
Shoot.
814
01:02:38,838 --> 01:02:42,007
What the heck is?
Oh, you nasty
815
01:02:44,761 --> 01:02:47,012
This is a mistake.
816
01:03:15,208 --> 01:03:17,209
Wait for me.
817
01:03:24,383 --> 01:03:28,386
Yes. It worked. I'm dry.
818
01:03:28,554 --> 01:03:30,555
See? Told you, Billy.
819
01:03:30,723 --> 01:03:33,225
You always fool
the bed-wetting goblins
820
01:03:33,392 --> 01:03:35,393
if you sleep in your day clothes.
821
01:03:35,561 --> 01:03:37,562
Go play with the kids.
822
01:03:56,082 --> 01:04:01,086
Oh, my neck. I'm so cold.
823
01:04:01,254 --> 01:04:03,505
Feel like a human pincushion.
824
01:04:03,673 --> 01:04:07,592
Relax, Charlie. Look around.
Oh, thank you.
825
01:04:10,596 --> 01:04:12,931
Would you look at that?
826
01:04:13,099 --> 01:04:15,267
They're running around'
having a good time.
827
01:04:15,434 --> 01:04:19,437
Oh, Buck's gonna go on and on
about how he was right
828
01:04:19,605 --> 01:04:22,440
and I'm way too overprotective.
829
01:04:22,608 --> 01:04:25,277
Buck's not gonna go on and on
about anything.
830
01:04:25,444 --> 01:04:27,946
I haven't seen him all morning.
831
01:04:42,795 --> 01:04:45,964
Sign up for camp, please?
Driftwood?
832
01:04:46,132 --> 01:04:48,800
Hey, do you Wanna sign up? No?
833
01:04:49,510 --> 01:04:52,387
Well, as you can tell, we've
obviously destroyed their camp
834
01:04:52,555 --> 01:04:53,972
over the last couple years.
835
01:04:54,140 --> 01:04:57,809
I'm thinking, once we kick
Driftwood's butt one more time
836
01:04:57,977 --> 01:05:00,103
this is where
the new hardware goes.
837
01:05:00,271 --> 01:05:03,315
What do you say?
It's gonna be great.
838
01:05:04,233 --> 01:05:06,484
Hey, Chuck E. Cheese!
839
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:08,987
Getting a little nervous?
840
01:05:09,989 --> 01:05:12,449
Let me give you the 411
on the day's events.
841
01:05:12,617 --> 01:05:13,950
Okay.
842
01:05:14,118 --> 01:05:18,163
The Olympiad starts.
Your team sucks. You lose.
843
01:05:18,331 --> 01:05:19,998
The end.
844
01:05:21,667 --> 01:05:23,919
Good luck, Lance.
845
01:05:25,671 --> 01:05:27,339
I don't need luck.
846
01:05:35,306 --> 01:05:38,016
Okay, I'll take it from here.
847
01:05:40,353 --> 01:05:43,146
Forfeit! I forfeit!
848
01:05:44,440 --> 01:05:48,360
Have you seen Grandpa Buck?
Col. Buck has been gone a long time.
849
01:05:48,527 --> 01:05:52,864
Guys, I'm sure he'll be here.
Okay, so just reach to the left.
850
01:05:53,157 --> 01:05:54,199
Stretch.
851
01:05:56,118 --> 01:05:59,204
No news yet on Buck.
Margaret's driving all over town.
852
01:05:59,372 --> 01:06:01,539
But I did find this in your office.
853
01:06:01,707 --> 01:06:04,376
Charlie, Uncle Sam called
about another job
854
01:06:04,543 --> 01:06:07,671
which is just as well, seeing
as things aren't working out here.
855
01:06:07,838 --> 01:06:10,048
Your tough Colonel Buck.
856
01:06:10,216 --> 01:06:12,676
I'll keep looking.
Okay.
857
01:06:12,843 --> 01:06:15,053
Is that from Grandpa?
858
01:06:16,555 --> 01:06:18,890
Yes. Yes, it is.
859
01:06:19,058 --> 01:06:21,851
He's not coming back?
860
01:06:22,019 --> 01:06:24,312
Well, no.
861
01:06:24,480 --> 01:06:27,190
He's the one that showed us
how to do everything.
862
01:06:27,358 --> 01:06:29,859
We're gonna get whupped.
I don't get whupped.
863
01:06:30,027 --> 01:06:31,403
I do the whupping.
864
01:06:31,570 --> 01:06:34,072
We're doomed. Doomed, I tell you.
865
01:06:34,240 --> 01:06:35,907
Wait, Wait, wait a minute.
866
01:06:36,075 --> 01:06:39,577
Just because Buck got called away
to serve his country last night
867
01:06:39,745 --> 01:06:43,248
doesn't mean we take everything he
taught us and just let it go to waste.
868
01:06:44,417 --> 01:06:47,335
He deserted us.
Without so much as a see you.
869
01:06:47,503 --> 01:06:51,589
No, no, no. He didn't.
It's here in the letter, listen.
870
01:06:51,757 --> 01:06:54,592
Dear Ben, Max, Juliette, Robert
871
01:06:54,760 --> 01:06:59,014
Carl, Jack, Becca, Billy,
and Mullet:
872
01:06:59,181 --> 01:07:02,225
Sorry to leave in the night
without even saying, 'See you'
873
01:07:02,393 --> 01:07:05,770
but it's important
that you don't panic.
874
01:07:05,938 --> 01:07:09,107
The 103rd Airborne is staging
manoeuvres tonight
875
01:07:09,275 --> 01:07:13,737
and let's just say they could learn
something about teamwork from you.
876
01:07:13,904 --> 01:07:17,115
The 103rd was retired
after World War II.
877
01:07:17,283 --> 01:07:19,534
Tell you what?
They're bringing it back.
878
01:07:19,702 --> 01:07:23,079
We can't do this Without Buck.
Yeah.
879
01:07:23,247 --> 01:07:26,291
Sure We can. You know what?
He would've wanted it that way.
880
01:07:26,459 --> 01:07:28,460
You know why?
Because we're a family.
881
01:07:28,627 --> 01:07:31,880
We'll pull each other up,
because that's what families do.
882
01:07:32,048 --> 01:07:35,300
If family's so important,
why'd Grandpa Buck leave?
883
01:07:35,468 --> 01:07:37,302
Yeah.
884
01:07:55,571 --> 01:07:58,490
Going that well, huh?
Best day of my life.
885
01:07:59,492 --> 01:08:02,160
Well, Ben seems upset
about Buck leaving.
886
01:08:02,995 --> 01:08:04,329
Yeah.
887
01:08:05,498 --> 01:08:09,834
You know why grandkids
and grandparents get along so well?
888
01:08:10,002 --> 01:08:12,420
They're united by a common enemy.
889
01:08:13,839 --> 01:08:15,507
Makes sense.
890
01:08:16,675 --> 01:08:21,179
I'm saying, if you and Buck could unite
around each other's strengths
891
01:08:21,347 --> 01:08:23,807
Ben could have
the best of both worlds.
892
01:08:27,019 --> 01:08:29,854
Go get them, coach. For all of us.
893
01:08:37,363 --> 01:08:41,366
Good news.
Found this in Buck's cabin.
894
01:08:44,870 --> 01:08:48,039
I'll Watch after the kids.
You go make things right.
895
01:08:48,207 --> 01:08:49,874
Thanks.
896
01:09:33,919 --> 01:09:36,588
You missed your train.
897
01:09:37,256 --> 01:09:40,258
I missed a train.
898
01:09:40,759 --> 01:09:43,261
Haven't really decided
which one I'm getting on yet.
899
01:09:45,431 --> 01:09:47,724
I thought you had
to be back for manoeuvres.
900
01:09:47,933 --> 01:09:51,269
That's true, but next year.
901
01:09:51,770 --> 01:09:54,939
That's about as often
as they let a broke-down retiree
902
01:09:55,107 --> 01:09:57,275
come out and play
with the reservists.
903
01:10:00,446 --> 01:10:02,405
Retiree.
904
01:10:06,118 --> 01:10:08,620
About the only action
I get these days
905
01:10:08,787 --> 01:10:11,623
is when college students
are doing
906
01:10:11,790 --> 01:10:14,209
research papers
on military history.
907
01:10:19,298 --> 01:10:20,798
So
908
01:10:20,966 --> 01:10:24,302
you abandoned your post
this morning.
909
01:10:24,470 --> 01:10:27,305
Good soldier knows
when he's in hostile territory.
910
01:10:28,432 --> 01:10:31,267
You heard me last night, didn't you?
911
01:10:31,602 --> 01:10:35,772
I guess I've had a few things
on my mind over the last
912
01:10:35,940 --> 01:10:38,233
30 years or so.
913
01:10:39,109 --> 01:10:41,819
I didn't even know
you felt that way.
914
01:10:45,282 --> 01:10:47,951
Strange, getting older.
915
01:10:49,954 --> 01:10:53,456
Easier remembering things
the way you Wish they were.
916
01:10:58,295 --> 01:11:00,838
I want you to know I'm proud
of the man you've become.
917
01:11:04,009 --> 01:11:06,135
The way you make adjustments
in the field
918
01:11:06,303 --> 01:11:09,806
like opening a day care centre
when you lost your job.
919
01:11:13,310 --> 01:11:15,311
Me, I wouldn't be able to do that.
920
01:11:18,357 --> 01:11:21,025
I've always needed more structure.
921
01:11:25,489 --> 01:11:30,326
I'm far from perfect, believe me.
Far from it.
922
01:11:34,999 --> 01:11:38,876
I know one thing though,
those kids are gonna be crushed
923
01:11:39,044 --> 01:11:42,880
unless your leathery old butt
comes back.
924
01:11:59,189 --> 01:12:00,898
Do you smell gasoline?
925
01:12:32,389 --> 01:12:33,765
That's right.
926
01:12:40,022 --> 01:12:44,442
Minor setback, people.
We'll get them in the next event.
927
01:12:44,610 --> 01:12:47,570
Wrestling?
Have you seen Max wrestle?
928
01:12:47,738 --> 01:12:49,739
He's right. I suck.
929
01:12:49,907 --> 01:12:54,369
Yeah. And that Canola guy's
hairier than my grandmother's mole.
930
01:12:54,536 --> 01:12:55,578
We're stewed.
931
01:12:55,746 --> 01:12:58,122
Can't we just go home?
This is embarrassing.
932
01:12:58,290 --> 01:13:00,875
No one's going anywhere
until we win this thing.
933
01:13:01,043 --> 01:13:04,420
Grandpa Buck.
Yay.
934
01:13:04,588 --> 01:13:07,924
Okay. Hands in, soldiers.
935
01:13:12,221 --> 01:13:15,223
It's another beautiful
woodchuck day.
936
01:13:17,935 --> 01:13:21,938
I knew you'd come back, Grandpa.
We couldn't do this without you.
937
01:13:22,106 --> 01:13:25,316
That's where you're wrong.
Your dad is the hero.
938
01:13:25,484 --> 01:13:26,526
My dad?
939
01:13:29,947 --> 01:13:33,074
Don't you realise he did
all this just for you?
940
01:13:34,118 --> 01:13:36,953
You're pretty lucky
to have Charlie Hinton
941
01:13:37,121 --> 01:13:39,455
as a father.
942
01:13:40,082 --> 01:13:43,292
He's a better soldier
than I'll ever be.
943
01:13:43,961 --> 01:13:45,920
I could never run a camp
like he can
944
01:13:46,088 --> 01:13:48,589
or watch over you
and your mom like he does.
945
01:13:49,299 --> 01:13:52,468
He may be a little overprotective
946
01:13:52,636 --> 01:13:55,847
but it's only because
he loves you so much.
947
01:14:03,480 --> 01:14:07,608
Colonel, we've got a problem.
Yeah, dude.
948
01:14:07,776 --> 01:14:09,861
What's the situation on the ground,
soldiers?
949
01:14:10,028 --> 01:14:13,698
My calculations suggest they've
cheated in nearly every event.
950
01:14:15,033 --> 01:14:17,034
Cheaters, huh?
951
01:14:17,870 --> 01:14:19,162
Well
952
01:14:19,329 --> 01:14:22,957
the only Way to beat cheaters
is by outsmarting them.
953
01:14:24,376 --> 01:14:25,877
I've got an idea.
954
01:14:26,211 --> 01:14:28,629
Okay. Okay, okay.
955
01:14:28,839 --> 01:14:32,049
First, We're gonna need the skunk.
956
01:14:32,217 --> 01:14:36,179
Here we go. Come on, good'
thattaway.
957
01:14:36,346 --> 01:14:38,681
Thattaboy. There We go.
958
01:14:38,849 --> 01:14:41,642
Ref, come on, man. I'm growing old.
959
01:14:43,687 --> 01:14:45,229
Look, here he comes.
960
01:15:36,573 --> 01:15:38,616
Ref. Substitution.
961
01:17:24,139 --> 01:17:26,307
Good job, Robert. Good job.
962
01:17:26,475 --> 01:17:28,893
Yeah, thattaway, purple.
There we go, yeah.
963
01:17:37,569 --> 01:17:40,905
That's too bad, Driftwood.
That's tough luck.
964
01:17:41,073 --> 01:17:44,784
Good hands, though, kid.
Good hands.
965
01:17:47,412 --> 01:17:52,124
We've got a sharpshooter.
We gotta do something.
966
01:17:53,710 --> 01:17:56,379
Give me a balloon.
967
01:17:57,714 --> 01:18:01,550
Billy? The water pump's over there.
968
01:18:01,718 --> 01:18:05,221
No, I'm not filling it with water.
969
01:18:05,389 --> 01:18:10,559
I've been holding this in all night.
970
01:18:18,402 --> 01:18:21,779
You shouldn't pick on kids
smaller than you.
971
01:18:24,783 --> 01:18:27,243
Yeah. Good catch. Good catch.
972
01:18:27,411 --> 01:18:31,122
It's pee! It's pee! It's pee!
973
01:18:31,289 --> 01:18:34,709
It's pee! Mom, it's pee!
974
01:18:37,129 --> 01:18:38,295
Yes!
975
01:18:43,093 --> 01:18:46,762
We're the tiebreaker.
We're gonna get the tiebreaker.
976
01:18:49,474 --> 01:18:53,728
It's another beautiful
woodchuck day.
977
01:19:00,110 --> 01:19:02,278
Suck it up. Let's go.
978
01:19:02,446 --> 01:19:05,448
Jeez, embarrassing.
979
01:19:11,121 --> 01:19:13,789
Okay, let's go get them.
Remember what we talked about.
980
01:19:13,957 --> 01:19:16,667
We need this one.
We need this one.
981
01:19:17,127 --> 01:19:19,503
That look familiar, Charlie?
982
01:19:19,671 --> 01:19:22,465
You lose this,
it's déjà vu all over again.
983
01:19:22,632 --> 01:19:26,177
Yeah, well, I got my best athlete
here' waiting to change history.
984
01:19:26,344 --> 01:19:28,095
Let's go, buddy, come on.
985
01:19:29,473 --> 01:19:30,681
You okay?
986
01:19:30,849 --> 01:19:35,144
I twisted my ankle when I fell.
I could shoot the arrow fine, but
987
01:19:35,312 --> 01:19:39,523
But can you climb?
I don't know. I don't think so.
988
01:19:39,691 --> 01:19:41,650
You can forfeit,
Charlie, if you like.
989
01:19:41,818 --> 01:19:45,112
No, no, that's okay.
Who's our best climber?
990
01:19:51,286 --> 01:19:55,539
I can do it, Dad.
All right. Come on, son.
991
01:19:57,501 --> 01:20:00,294
You're gonna race that kid.
That's gonna be tough, huh?
992
01:20:00,462 --> 01:20:03,005
Yeah, real tough.
Like father, like son, huh?
993
01:20:03,173 --> 01:20:04,882
Don't listen to him. Come on.
994
01:20:05,050 --> 01:20:07,176
All right. Come on, let's go.
995
01:20:07,344 --> 01:20:09,345
All right.
Go get him.
996
01:20:09,513 --> 01:20:12,181
Okay, Ben, listen to me.
997
01:20:12,349 --> 01:20:14,517
Whatever you do
998
01:20:14,851 --> 01:20:18,187
don't drop the baton, okay?
999
01:20:19,856 --> 01:20:21,524
Ben.
1000
01:20:21,691 --> 01:20:24,527
Just enjoy it.
1001
01:20:31,243 --> 01:20:32,993
Okay, here it comes.
1002
01:20:33,203 --> 01:20:36,038
All right, focus. Here we go.
1003
01:20:36,915 --> 01:20:38,332
Come on, Ben.
1004
01:20:57,602 --> 01:20:58,853
Go get him.
1005
01:20:59,396 --> 01:21:01,397
Go Ben!
Go Ben!
1006
01:21:03,441 --> 01:21:06,694
Come on. Get up there.
Come on, Ben.
1007
01:21:06,862 --> 01:21:10,447
Get them little legs going.
Come on, Ben.
1008
01:21:10,615 --> 01:21:11,782
Go, Ben.
1009
01:21:12,450 --> 01:21:14,577
Come on, Ben.
1010
01:21:21,293 --> 01:21:23,377
It's okay. It's okay, son.
1011
01:21:23,587 --> 01:21:26,589
I told you, you're a loser,
just like your old man.
1012
01:21:26,756 --> 01:21:28,549
You're not a loser, Ben.
1013
01:21:28,717 --> 01:21:32,553
He greased the wall. He's cheating.
1014
01:21:33,263 --> 01:21:37,057
No, don't listen to her.
She's a compulsive liar.
1015
01:21:37,225 --> 01:21:39,727
And she steals.
1016
01:21:39,895 --> 01:21:43,647
You cheated.
You're a cheater. You're a cheater.
1017
01:21:43,815 --> 01:21:47,776
Canola cheats. He's cheating.
He's a cheater.
1018
01:21:47,944 --> 01:21:51,614
He's a cheater. Canola cheats.
He's a cheater!
1019
01:21:51,781 --> 01:21:55,618
Ben, no, no. Get down from there.
That's dangerous, Ben.
1020
01:21:55,785 --> 01:21:58,829
Ben. Please, please, Ben.
Ben, get down from there.
1021
01:21:59,956 --> 01:22:02,458
No, no, that's dangerous.
Ben, that's dangerous.
1022
01:22:04,461 --> 01:22:06,086
Pounce, Bobby J. Here We go.
1023
01:22:06,588 --> 01:22:08,088
Up that wall.
1024
01:22:11,426 --> 01:22:12,843
Bobby J, go, go, go.
1025
01:22:13,011 --> 01:22:14,595
Go!
1026
01:22:30,987 --> 01:22:33,864
That's my baby. That is my
That's my baby. Yeah!
1027
01:22:34,032 --> 01:22:37,618
Oh, whoa, hey, What? Hey.
All right, Bobby J, come here.
1028
01:22:37,786 --> 01:22:39,662
Come here, buddy.
I did it, Daddy.
1029
01:22:39,829 --> 01:22:43,123
I know it, buddy.
I love you, Dad.
1030
01:22:44,167 --> 01:22:48,379
I love you too, son.
I love you too, you crazy kid.
1031
01:22:48,546 --> 01:22:50,172
You call that Canola?
1032
01:22:50,340 --> 01:22:52,841
That was embarrassing.
What are you, a moron?
1033
01:22:53,009 --> 01:22:54,969
Moron? You're the moron.
1034
01:23:00,183 --> 01:23:02,518
Wall coming down.
1035
01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:11,568
That's for telling everyone
you're not my dad.
1036
01:23:11,736 --> 01:23:13,862
I'm so excited. I'm so excited.
1037
01:23:14,030 --> 01:23:17,241
Let's go tell my mom.
She's here to pick me up.
1038
01:23:17,409 --> 01:23:20,369
You were really great
in the Egg Relay.
1039
01:23:24,374 --> 01:23:28,335
What'd I tell you?
Chicks love gold medalists.
1040
01:23:28,503 --> 01:23:30,879
Teach me everything you know.
1041
01:23:31,047 --> 01:23:34,758
Well, first you got a bird'
and then you got a bee.
1042
01:23:38,972 --> 01:23:43,350
Why?
1043
01:23:47,105 --> 01:23:48,605
Okay.
1044
01:23:48,773 --> 01:23:51,233
Mr. Hinton?
Hi.
1045
01:23:51,401 --> 01:23:54,695
All the parents think
Camp Canola may not set
1046
01:23:54,863 --> 01:23:56,739
the best example
for our children.
1047
01:23:56,906 --> 01:23:59,908
And so, if it's not
too short of notice
1048
01:24:00,076 --> 01:24:03,746
we'd like our kids to come
to your camp as soon as possible.
1049
01:24:03,913 --> 01:24:07,082
Too short notice? Don't be silly.
There's room enough for everyone.
1050
01:24:07,250 --> 01:24:12,087
Yeah, Dale and I can sign all
you guys up. Welcome.
1051
01:24:15,467 --> 01:24:18,510
It was really my son who did all this.
Colonel?
1052
01:24:19,262 --> 01:24:21,805
Job well done.
1053
01:24:25,268 --> 01:24:26,894
Just call me Dad.
1054
01:24:36,279 --> 01:24:38,155
Hey, what do you say
we go get the trophy?
1055
01:24:38,323 --> 01:24:41,325
Yeah!
Okay.
79191
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