All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S05E10 A Little Chicken Soup Wouldnt Hurt 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle, USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

Well, here we are, huh?

You're in a hurry, huh?
You haven't got time to sit a minute?

Well, it isn't that. It's just that I told
Naomi and the kids I'd be home early.

So why didn't you bring them, Sol?

You know what a pleasure I get
when I see them.

You know why, Ma. I brought them
last week. You always do too much!

You're always cooking
and baking and serving.

- You knock yourself out.
- So I knock myself out.

If I can't knock myself out for my
children, who can I knock myself out for?

For nobody, that's just it,
that's why we brought you out here,

so you could rest and relax.
You've worked hard all your life.

Now just sit and look at the ocean.

How long does it take to look at an ocean?

What I mean is just relax,
just... sit and don't do anything.

- You know people who are able to do that.
- Sure, I know them.

They're all laying there in Forest Lawn.

You know what I mean.
Now, you be a good girl.

- You'll bring the children next week?
- I'm not gonna tell you.

'Cause if I do, you'll get busy
in the kitchen again.

So long, Ma. I'll see ya.

- Bye, Ma.
- Kiss the children and Naomi.

And drive careful. Don't take chances.

So you'll get there five minutes later.

Excuse me, young man. What time is it?

It's 20 minutes after one, ma'am.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Excuse me, young man,
you're before lunch or you're after lunch?

No, ma'am, I haven't had it yet.

- So why are you eating peanuts?
- Ma'am?

Peanuts lay on the chest,
especially before lunch.

Oh, well, it's just a few.

Excuse me, young man. Where were you
planning to have this lunch?

Well, there's the hot dog stand
right down the street here.

I thought I'd stop there
and have a few hot dogs.

- That's a lunch?
- Ma'am?

Well, that's no lunch.
First peanuts and then a hot dog?

And what about a hot vegetable,
a piece of fruit,

a hot drink to wash it all down?

Oh, well, usually on Sundays,
I don't like to go to a restaurant.

I just stop and get a sandwich and a bag
of peanuts and a candy bar, you know.

Yeah, I know. Chazerei.

Ma'am?

Something to stuff yourself with.

Um, excuse me, young man.

- It has to be peanuts and hot dogs?
- Ma'am?

Well, I mean, if you would sit down
to a nice hot lunch,

wouldn't that be better
than to eat standing up?

It shall all go down into your feet.

Oh, well, I really didn't wanna bother
going to a restaurant.

Who's talking about a restaurant?

I'm talking about by me in a house.

Oh.

That's real nice of you, Miss...

Gordon. I'm Molly Gordon.

And with whom have I got the pleasure?

Oh, I'm Gomer. Uh, Gomer Pyle.
I'm pleased to meet you, ma'am.

You're very, very polite, Gomer.

But you're very skinny. Like a toothpick.

So, you'll come?

Well, I really don't know
whether I should.

Eh, it's all right, you'll come,
you'll eat, you'll enjoy.

Settled, yes?

Well... Well, all right.

A toothpick. Just like a toothpick.

That's my children and my grandchildren,
my whole life.

- Well, they're very nice.
- What do you mean "nice"? They're perfect.

That's my daughter-in-law, Naomela.

And these are the grandchildren,
Stevela and Lindela!

And that's my Solela.
He graduated from UCLA.

- magna cum laude.
- What's he do?

Well, he went for a CPA,

and now he has a very big, important
company in Los Angeles.

- Well, that's wonderful.
- He has a partner,

but, uh, Sol does all the work.

- You must be real proud of him.
- Psss!

He looks like a real fine fella.

I couldn't help but noticing
when he was talking to you out there.

Oh, Sol is a good boy.

You see, after my Sam died,
I went to live with him and his family.

I used to cook for them and clean,
I was a babysitter.

Hm! What didn't I do?

So then Sol decided
I was working too hard. I should retire.

So he fixed me up with this apartment.

$300 a month.

- Ooh, that's wonderful.
- What do I need it?

- Huh?
- What do I need it, Gomer?

It's too fancy-schmancy.
You know what I think?

I think the whole place
was decorated by a sissy.

- Well, it's real pretty, though.
- Eh!

Look at this, standing and talking.
I bet you're starved.

Come. Come. We can talk by the table.
Sit down.

And now, Gomer, you're going to start
with a piece of fish.

Homemade gefilte fish that I made myself.

Then I'll give you a plate
of chicken soup, wouldn't hurt,

and a piece of chicken.

Then I'll give you a little piece
of gedempte flanken.

This gedempte flanken you never ate.

That's right, I never even heard of it.

Peanuts and hot dogs you heard about
and gedempte flanken not?

What the matter, they don't teach you
nothing in the Marines?

Golly, Miss Gordon,
that sounds like an awful lot of food.

- No, wait, I'm not finished yet.
- There's more?

Well, if you wouldn't taste my kugel,
I'll feel insulted.

So, go, darling, start. Eat, yes?

Here, put a little horseradish
on the fish.

Wouldn't hurt. Yeah?

You like it? It's good?

Mmm! It's delicious!

So I'll get you another piece.

- But I've hardly started on this one.
- I'll get you another piece.

- I really think this will be enough.
- Oh, you don't like it?

- I love it, it's delicious!
- So I'll get you another piece.

Oh, you're there. Here. Here's your tea.

Well, thank you, ma'am.
Miss Gordon, do you play the piano?

Meh. An Oscar Levant I'm not.

It's really the piano
for the grandchildren when they come.

What's this say? Di Grine Kuzine.

- Is that right?
- Perfect.

I bet you speak Jewish.

What was your name before you changed it?

- It was always Pyle.
- You didn't shorten it?

- No, ma'am.
- Pyle could've been Pylchinsky,

Pylaschevitz, Pyliakov.

You find out. I bet you'll be surprised.

I don't think so. But what does this mean?

Di Grine Kuzine?
It means "The Green Cousin."

You see, it's a story about a cousin

who comes from the Old Country to America

and she's green, a greenhorn.

But she's beautiful,

with cheeks like red apples
and dancing feet.

And she gets a job in a millinery store

and one, two, three,
she becomes a Yankee.

[laughs] Well, that's cute.
Can you sing it?

Well, a Barbra Streisand I'm not.

But I'll try. Come.

[cheerful piano tune]

♪ Tsu mir iz gekumen a Kuzine

♪ She yn vi gold iz zi geven, di Grine

♪ Bekelakh vi royte pomerantsn

♪ Fiselakh vos betn zich tsum tantsn

♪ Bekelakh vi royte pomerantsn

♪ Fiselakh vos betn zich tsum tantsn

- [both laugh]
- That was wonderful!

- Now you try it.
- Oh, no.

No, no, look.
The words are written in English letters.

You read English, yeah? Come. Try.

[cheerful piano tune]

♪ Tsu mir iz gekumen a Kuzine

♪ She yn vi gold iz zi geven, di Grine

♪ Bekelakh vi royte pomerantsn

♪ Fiselakh vos betn zich tsum tantsn

[both] ♪ Bekelakh vi royte pomerantsn

[both] ♪ Fiselakh vos betn zich tsum tantsn

[both laugh]

You know, you got a very nice voice,
Gomer.

- Thank you.
- Now you see, you sing a song,

you relax a little,
and now I bet you're hungry again.

Oh, no, ma'am, not for a long time.

Never mind, we sing a few more songs
and you'll get hungry again.

Do you like blintzes with sour cream?

Yoo-hoo, Gomer! You're home?

Miss Gordon.
How did you get way back here?

Well, they told me I would find you here,
so I found you here.

Oh, it's all right, I'm not staying.
I know you're busy.

- I just came to bring you something.
- Well, what's that?

Well, Gomer, you know,
when you left yesterday, I felt terrible.

There was so much good food left over.

So I decided I would bring it to you.

Oh, Miss Gordon,
you shouldn't have done that.

What do you mean?
I have to throw it out anyway.

Well, looks like you brought an awful lot.

And, well, I'm not sure my sergeant

will let me keep all that
here in the barracks.

- Why shouldn't he let you keep it?
- He just might object.

But why should he object? Come.
Come to your sergeant and I'll explain.

No, no, no, no, it's too heavy for you.

[Gomer] Sergeant?

What do you want, Pyle?
You're supposed to be out on detail.

Yes, sir, I know, but I was wondering
if I could ask you a favor.

Whatever it is, the answer's no.

What do you mean "no," Sergeant?

You didn't even hear yet what the favor is
and already it's "no"?

Huh? Who's this?

Well, that's what I wanted
to talk to you about.

Mrs. Gordon, this is Sergeant Carter,
and that's Corporal Slater.

- How do you do?
- Mrs. Gordon was nice enough

to invite me to Sunday dinner yesterday.

And today she brought over some food
she thought we might like.

You know, Gomer,
when I look on your sergeant,

I can see here is a man who likes to eat.

Look at the pair of cheeks!

Look how nice he's filled out
in the front and in the back.

- Not like you. Toothpick.
- Uh, ma'am...

How much did you weigh
when you were born, Sergeant?

I bet you were a small baby.

Sure, small babies
all grow up big and fat.

- Uh, Mrs. Gordon...
- You wanna know what's in the bag, huh?

I can tell you're an eater!

Excuse me, Sergeant.
You're before lunch or you're after lunch?

Uh, no, we're gonna have our lunch
in a few minutes.

- So why are you smoking?
- Huh?

If you're going to eat, you don't smoke.

So, this is what I've got in the bag.

Here...

Ah! There.

Uh, look, this is all very nice,
uh, Mrs. Gordon,

but pretty soon they're gonna be
calling us to lunch.

- In just a few minutes.
- So you'll go to lunch.

- This is just a nosh.
- A what?

- A nosh, Sergeant. That's just a snack.
- You tell him, Gomer.

All right, first...
You like chopped liver?

Well, I'm sure it tastes very good,
but, uh, we got our lunch waiting for us

- in the dining room.
- Tell me, Sergeant,

who does the cooking for you here?

He's a very good cook. Charley Hacker.

I should live so long
if your Charley Hacker

can make chopped liver like this.
Here, taste.

Tell me, who has better chopped liver,

me or Charley Hacker?

- This is delicious!
- So what are we standing?

Boys, sit, sit!

That's right, it's bad to eat standing up.
It all goes right to your feet.

This is delicious! We certainly do
appreciate this, Mrs. Gordon.

If you really appreciate,

- you could do me a favor.
- Hm? What's that?

Tonight you'll all come to my house
for dinner.

- Oh, we couldn't do that.
- You don't have to give us dinner, too.

All right, hold it!
I'm still in charge here!

If Mrs. Gordon says we're going to dinner,
we're going to dinner.

A gezunt ahf dein...

So you'll come, you'll eat, you'll enjoy.

I forgot something. To drink!

How can you eat it so dry?

Here. Here you are.

And I'll see you all tonight, yes?
Gomer will show you where to go.

- All right. Thank you very much.
- Gomer, when you come,

you'll bring the empty seltzer bottle?
It's a deposit.

Hey, you're Mr. Gordon, Mrs. Gordon's son.

- That's right, yeah.
- Well, I'm Gomer Pyle.

I don't know whether your mother told you,
but she invited me

and the sergeant and Duke here
to dinner tonight.

No, she didn't say. She just said
she was having company, that's all.

- She's the nicest lady.
- And she makes a heck of a chopped liver.

Can I talk to you fellas a minute here?

Look, I don't wanna spoil anything,
but, well, this is just the thing

I'm trying to keep her away from.

You see, my mother would cook for
the whole world if she had the chance.

One of the reasons I set her up out here

was so she would get away
from the drudgery of cooking

and having to work so hard at her age.

Now, I think she's earned a rest,

and I'm just trying to make sure
that she'll get it.

- You guys can understand that, can't you?
- Well, yeah. What do you want us to do?

Just don't go in.
Just forget about the dinner invitation.

Well, shouldn't we at least go in
and explain why we ain't coming?

No. When she finds out
you're not gonna show up,

she'll just turn in early
and get a good night's rest.

But she'll be real disappointed.
She's expecting us.

It'll be all right. Now, just don't worry.

But we promised we'd be here.

Pyle, you heard what he said.
He said don't worry about it.

So don't worry about it. Okay, we'll go.

Thanks. I really appreciate it. Thanks.

Sergeant, I'm wondering
if we're doing the right thing.

- Huh?
- Shouldn't we have told Miss Gordon

we're not coming? That poor old lady's
gonna be sitting there waiting on us.

Pyle, you heard what her son said.
He said don't go in!

But she's still gonna to wonder
what happened.

Look, maybe her son knows something
he didn't wanna tell us.

- What do you mean, Sergeant?
- What if she's a sick woman

and shouldn't exert herself,
and one more dinner could kill her?

Do you want that on your conscience?
Come on, do you guys want a pizza or not?

- But, Sergeant...
- What now, Pyle?

Well, even if she ain't supposed to
exert herself or work,

maybe we could invite her to dinner.
Couldn't we do that?

Pyle, her son said leave her alone, let's
leave her alone. He must have a reason!

Well, Sergeant, I'll feel a whole lot
better if I go back and see Miss Gordon.

I won't tell her that we saw her son,

but I will ask her
to go have a bite to eat with me.

Okay, Pyle, you wanna get mixed up in
a family deal, go ahead. Come on, Slater.

[doorbell rings]

Oh, Gomer, you're here.
Well, what happened?

You had an accident? Where are the others?
Where's the sergeant?

Oh, well, ma'am, they decided
at the last minute not to come.

Why? What's the matter? I said something?

Oh, no, of course not.
They just decided not to come,

and since they're not coming, I thought it
might be nice if I took you out to dinner.

- What?
- I'd like to take you out to a restaurant.

Who eats in a restaurant?

You eat in a restaurant
when you're out of town.

- Well, please say you'll come.
- But everything's prepared. It'll...

I know, but it'll keep.
Why don't you take the night off,

and for a change, let somebody
wait on you. How does that sound?

- Meshugge.
- What's that mean?

It means crazy.

- Then you won't come?
- I'll come, I'll come.

But it's Meshugge.

You have decided, monsieur?

Oh, Miss Gordon,
have you made up your mind yet?

So much to read.

And the prices...

Now don't you worry about that.
What would you like?

I know, how about a steak? Have a steak.

- We'll have two steak dinners.
- Very good, monsieur.

And how do you like the steaks?

- How do you like your steak, Miss Gordon?
- How should I know? I didn't taste it yet.

Oh, I didn't mean that.
Do you like it rare or medium or...?

- Oh, medium, medium, please.
- Same for me.

Very good, monsieur.

[gentle music plays quietly]

- Wanna dance?
- Dance?

Well, yeah, it is all right
for you to dance, isn't it?

Well, when I got something to dance about,
I dance.

But when I'm sitting in a restaurant
and at home I got a full refrigerator,

I got nothing to dance about.

Come on, let's give it a try anyway.

What you thinking about, Miss Gordon?

- Gomer, you wouldn't believe it.
- What?

What you're paying for those two steaks,
I could make dinner for 16 people.

And have some to throw out.

- Is it good?
- Hm. It's a little dry.

That's creamed spinach.

It's a little flat.

How are the mashed potatoes?

It's a little lumpy.

I'm sorry. Would you like to order
something else, Miss Gordon?

No, no, no, it's fine.

- You'll excuse me.
- Is anything wrong?

No, no. I'll be right back.

Excuse me, sir, the lady who was with me,
did you happen to see where she went?

- Oh, yes, I did, sir.
- You did? Is she all right? Where is she?

She's not sick, is she?

In there, sir.

Now, in the creamed spinach,
I add a touch of nutmeg

and a teaspoon grated onion. Here, taste.

- You like it?
- Delizioso!

Would I lie to you?
The mashed potatoes I wouldn't throw out.

I would make a potato kugel.
A potato kugel is easy to make.

You got some gribenes?

[chuckles] Oh, Gomer, I had
such a wonderful time, I can't tell you.

Well, I don't see how 'cause you cooked
dinner for the chef and his whole staff.

Oh, but it was my pleasure.

Gomer, I didn't embarrass you,
though, did I?

Me? How could you embarrass me?

I mean when I went in the kitchen
there in the restaurant.

Oh, no, ma'am. And besides,
they really all seemed to enjoy it.

I enjoyed it more than them.

[sobs softly]

- You did, didn't you?
- Ah...

Well, that's all that matters.

Uh, when are you gonna invite me
to have dinner again?

Right now. Come on in.
I got a full refrigerator.

No, ma'am, not right now, but...
well, how about tomorrow night?

Tomorrow night, any night. Abi gezunt!

Well, could I bring some friends?

Bring friends, bring anybody.

[chuckles] Thank you, ma'am.
Just one more thing.

Tomorrow night,
is your son coming to see you?

Yes, I think so. Or I could call him.
Why? You would like to meet him?

Well, yes, ma'am, I would.

All right, so you'll come tomorrow night.

Yes, ma'am, and I'll call you later and
let you know who else is coming with me.

Oh, thank you, Gomerela.
Thank you for tonight.

And thank you for tomorrow night.

You should live to be 125.

[sighs]

Look, I ain't gonna get myself humiliated
two nights in a row.

What if her son comes in tonight
and tells us to get lost?

Oh, well, I think everything
will be all right tonight, Sergeant.

Why is tonight different?

Since I took her out to dinner last night,

maybe he won't feel
she's being overworked.

- Nothing doing.
- Oh, please come, Sergeant.

She was terrible disappointed
you didn't last night.

And she'll feel even worse
if you don't come tonight.

- I'm sorry.
- She said she'd make some kreplach.

And since you liked her chopped liver
so much,

she said she'd make a whole bunch of that.

And she's gonna make
one of her specialties, gedempte flanken.

I've had it and it's delicious!

- With potato kugel?
- With potato kugel.

- And tsimmis?
- And tsimmis.

I'll go, I'll go.

[doorbell rings]

[lively chatter]

- Hi, Mr. Gordon.
- Hey, what's going on?

You're surprised to see me here,
aren't you?

Well, frankly, yes. My mother called
and said you were anxious to meet me.

Well, not so much me
as really all the other fellas.

Huh? What are you talking about?
What fellas?

Just step inside, Mr. Gordon.

[Mrs. Gordon] Would you give me
that please?

Thank you very much!

[lively chatter]

What's going on?
What are you trying to do, kill her?!

Well, no, sir. And I hope
you won't take offense to my asking,

but... are you trying to kill her?

Now, what's that supposed to mean?

I guess it just means
that she's going to surely die

if she's not allowed to do
what she wants to do,

and, well,
that's doing things for other people.

But if she's forced to sit on a park bench
and look out at the ocean,

well, she's just going to get a lot older
before her time,

and it's just gonna surely
shorten her life.

Mrs. Gordon, could I have some of that
kugel? They're eating it all down there.

Excuse me, boys, can I have that?
Thank you!

Now tell the truth, Mr. Gordon,

when's the last time
you saw your mother that happy?

- Well...
- Here. Anybody want a little bit of this?

Shall we go have some gedempte flanken?

Why not?

[lively chatter]

There we are!

[Carter] And left! And left!

[Carter] Hup! And left!

[Carter] Platoon, halt!

[Carter] Left face! Dismissed!

- Hello! Hello, boys!
- Hello, Mrs. Gordon.

I hope you don't mind, I made myself
at home and waited for you.

- What are you doing way out here?
- Two things.

- First, I came to bring you the good news.
- What's the good news?

I'm moving back in the house
with my son, the CPA.

- [Gomer] Oh, that's nice.
- Yes, it is nice.

And I know who I got to thank for it,
Gomerela.

- Aw...
- Never mind, "aw."

Sometimes it takes a stranger
to point out something

that your own son can't understand.

So now my Sol understands,
thanks to Gomer Pyle.

He's real smart, Sergeant.

- Who Sol?
- Oh, Sol is smart with figures.

But Gomer is smart with people.

What was the other thing
you was gonna tell us, Miss Gordon?

Well, the other thing,
as long as I'm giving up the apartment,

I had to clean out the refrigerator.

So I brought you a couple of things.

I put them inside. It's all right?

Oh, sure.

A nosh.