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1
00:00:01,632 --> 00:00:03,694
It's about time, Mr. Lollygag.
2
00:00:03,757 --> 00:00:05,334
I sent you to the store hours ago.
3
00:00:05,382 --> 00:00:07,883
Sorry, Mom. I tried to drive
fast but there were squirrels.
4
00:00:07,983 --> 00:00:10,016
ADULT TIMMY: My mom and Frank
had this weird co-dependency
5
00:00:10,102 --> 00:00:12,135
where his happiness
was tied to her happiness,
6
00:00:12,237 --> 00:00:13,854
but so was her happiness.
7
00:00:13,939 --> 00:00:16,523
- Hell's bells, real Cool Whip?
- It was on your list.
8
00:00:16,608 --> 00:00:18,775
- Oh...
- You let him buy real Cool Whip?
9
00:00:18,861 --> 00:00:20,249
Did I get a raise I don't know about?
10
00:00:20,327 --> 00:00:22,863
I wrote Cool Whip with a "K,"
the cheap store brand.
11
00:00:22,948 --> 00:00:24,364
Never buy anything spelled correctly.
12
00:00:24,450 --> 00:00:26,483
At Ralph's you pay extra for grammar.
13
00:00:26,585 --> 00:00:28,535
Been a long day.
I'm gonna take a shower.
14
00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:30,620
- It won't happen again, Mom.
- I need to be able to count on you
15
00:00:30,706 --> 00:00:32,289
while your dad's doing
all this overtime.
16
00:00:34,259 --> 00:00:37,561
[Southern accent] Greetings
and salutations, madam!
17
00:00:37,624 --> 00:00:39,662
I had been cast
in a production of "Show Boat,"
18
00:00:39,765 --> 00:00:41,131
playing a suave riverboat gambler.
19
00:00:41,216 --> 00:00:42,999
Unfortunately, the only
person from the South
20
00:00:43,102 --> 00:00:45,168
I was familiar with was Foghorn Leghorn.
21
00:00:45,270 --> 00:00:48,388
I say, I say, what a charming evening,
22
00:00:48,474 --> 00:00:51,308
the scent of juniper filling the air.
23
00:00:51,369 --> 00:00:52,572
- Oh.
- It's not juniper,
24
00:00:52,596 --> 00:00:53,945
it's Mom's boiled cabbage.
25
00:00:53,946 --> 00:00:55,645
And you missed out!
26
00:00:55,731 --> 00:00:57,481
Enjoy your peanut butter
sandwich for supper.
27
00:00:57,566 --> 00:00:59,900
Oh, I think we can do better
than that for our star.
28
00:00:59,985 --> 00:01:03,069
- Star.
- I am the star!
29
00:01:03,155 --> 00:01:04,704
I totally aced my audition.
30
00:01:04,823 --> 00:01:07,157
How many male roles in this show?
31
00:01:07,242 --> 00:01:08,375
Seventeen.
32
00:01:09,962 --> 00:01:12,129
Maybe we should've put up more fliers.
33
00:01:12,214 --> 00:01:16,666
♪
34
00:01:16,752 --> 00:01:19,369
I'm making a Hungry-Man dinner for
your dad. I'll throw one in for you.
35
00:01:19,471 --> 00:01:22,539
He gets a Hungry-Man for showing up late?
Why is Timmy so special?
36
00:01:22,641 --> 00:01:24,758
Oh, he's only special
compared to the rest of you.
37
00:01:24,843 --> 00:01:27,894
Oh, you hear that?
It's not you, it's us!
38
00:01:28,013 --> 00:01:29,379
How'd rehearsal go?
39
00:01:29,481 --> 00:01:31,148
Did you bring up my suggestion
of adding a genie?
40
00:01:31,233 --> 00:01:33,383
I doubt they'd have a genie
on a Mississippi riverboat.
41
00:01:33,485 --> 00:01:35,152
All I know is it works on that show.
42
00:01:35,237 --> 00:01:37,154
This production has much
bigger problems, Mom.
43
00:01:37,239 --> 00:01:38,822
I'm doing the best work of my career,
44
00:01:38,907 --> 00:01:40,524
but these sets are amateur hour.
45
00:01:40,609 --> 00:01:42,776
It's called "Show Boat,"
and so far there's no boat.
46
00:01:42,861 --> 00:01:44,828
Wendi says they can't spend
any money on sets.
47
00:01:44,913 --> 00:01:47,230
The whole point is raising funds
for soccer equipment.
48
00:01:47,332 --> 00:01:49,899
The whole point is reaching
across those footlights
49
00:01:50,002 --> 00:01:51,901
to bring a little magic
into people's lives.
50
00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:54,571
And what's more magical than a genie?
51
00:01:54,673 --> 00:01:57,574
I'll shut up now.
52
00:01:57,676 --> 00:01:59,742
I couldn't help overhear
that your little show
53
00:01:59,845 --> 00:02:02,629
might be in need of some
nautical-themed items.
54
00:02:02,714 --> 00:02:05,015
I am a man with influential
friends and associates.
55
00:02:05,100 --> 00:02:06,683
Uh-huh, you saw "The Godfather" again.
56
00:02:06,768 --> 00:02:08,718
Seriously, how do you keep
getting into that movie?
57
00:02:08,772 --> 00:02:09,988
I am a man with influential
58
00:02:10,044 --> 00:02:11,556
- friends and associates.
- [Sighs]
59
00:02:11,557 --> 00:02:14,090
I might be able to procure
some boat stuff for your set.
60
00:02:14,193 --> 00:02:15,308
What's that gonna cost me?
61
00:02:15,394 --> 00:02:17,594
You insult me with offers of money.
62
00:02:17,696 --> 00:02:18,928
But someday...
63
00:02:19,031 --> 00:02:20,480
and this day may never come...
64
00:02:20,566 --> 00:02:22,766
I will call upon you
to do a service for me.
65
00:02:22,868 --> 00:02:23,967
You're saying it may never come?
66
00:02:24,036 --> 00:02:26,019
Oh... it'll come.
67
00:02:26,104 --> 00:02:28,086
So, what have I been missing
around here?
68
00:02:28,140 --> 00:02:29,742
Anything interesting with the kids?
69
00:02:29,820 --> 00:02:30,874
You skip a few nights at home,
70
00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:32,309
you think they suddenly get interesting?
71
00:02:32,377 --> 00:02:33,894
That's kind of interesting.
72
00:02:33,979 --> 00:02:38,848
["Drunken Sailor" plays]
73
00:02:38,951 --> 00:02:40,350
Oh, my God.
74
00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:41,851
Joey got that for my show!
75
00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:43,954
How does he get his mitts
on crazy stuff like that?
76
00:02:43,990 --> 00:02:45,190
Don't ask too many questions.
77
00:02:45,246 --> 00:02:46,891
Otherwise, I might have
to return my Ginsu knives.
78
00:02:46,892 --> 00:02:48,808
I just hope there's not some
ocean liner out there,
79
00:02:48,894 --> 00:02:50,794
drifting around in circles.
80
00:02:50,862 --> 00:02:53,597
Frank, you'll need to drive
Timmy to his rehearsal.
81
00:02:53,699 --> 00:02:55,765
He's not gonna be able to carry
that wheel on his bike.
82
00:02:56,089 --> 00:02:58,039
You've got the whole house
jumping through hoops
83
00:02:58,111 --> 00:02:59,176
just because you're in a show.
84
00:02:59,238 --> 00:03:00,770
- It's not fair.
- If it bugs you,
85
00:03:00,839 --> 00:03:02,639
do something great
that people like, like I do.
86
00:03:02,708 --> 00:03:05,709
I'm great at important things
like algebra and penmanship...
87
00:03:05,794 --> 00:03:07,160
not lame stuff like musicals.
88
00:03:07,279 --> 00:03:09,145
"Show Boat," lame?
89
00:03:09,197 --> 00:03:12,382
Tell that to legendary
theater impresario...
90
00:03:12,434 --> 00:03:14,417
Florenz Ziegfeld.
91
00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:15,819
Looking back, it's shocking
92
00:03:15,887 --> 00:03:17,720
that my brothers didn't punch me more.
93
00:03:17,773 --> 00:03:19,606
- ["Drunken Sailor" plays]
- Hey!
94
00:03:19,691 --> 00:03:21,174
Look what we brought!
95
00:03:21,260 --> 00:03:23,927
A genuine captain's wheel? Far out!
96
00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:25,528
Yeah, my brother got it for us
for the Cotton Blossom.
97
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:28,531
Thanks so much, Frank!
98
00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:29,854
[Laughing] Oh. Oh, no, no, I meant my...
99
00:03:29,916 --> 00:03:32,202
I like to support the theater.
100
00:03:32,271 --> 00:03:34,604
Aren't you late for your dumb nonsense?
101
00:03:34,706 --> 00:03:36,039
Yeah.
102
00:03:36,141 --> 00:03:38,341
Are you one of the actors, too, then?
103
00:03:38,410 --> 00:03:40,243
No, I'm from the soccer team.
104
00:03:40,279 --> 00:03:41,878
We're hoping to buy
shin guards this year
105
00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:43,746
so I can finally stop bleeding
through my knee socks.
106
00:03:43,799 --> 00:03:45,848
We tried to get her
to be in the show because...
107
00:03:45,901 --> 00:03:48,285
Uh-huh, because why?
108
00:03:48,337 --> 00:03:52,188
You know, because it's set
in the South, and...
109
00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:54,109
you have such a beautiful singing voice.
110
00:03:54,133 --> 00:03:55,351
I don't.
111
00:03:55,377 --> 00:03:57,260
But I am the only
black person in school.
112
00:03:59,481 --> 00:04:01,164
[Snaps fingers] We should
get this wheel backstage.
113
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:04,434
Ladies, I can handle it.
I placed in the 75th percentile
114
00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:07,103
for the President's
Physical Fitness Test.
115
00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:12,008
♪
116
00:04:12,060 --> 00:04:13,910
Hey pal, look what Gino brought me.
117
00:04:13,996 --> 00:04:15,445
A whole case.
118
00:04:15,497 --> 00:04:17,314
- Check this out.
- How'd you come across that?
119
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:20,083
[Chuckles] Well, let's just say
it fell off the back of a truck.
120
00:04:20,152 --> 00:04:22,318
- Is that what happened?
- Pretty much.
121
00:04:22,371 --> 00:04:23,634
Truck hit a speed bump,
it fell off the back.
122
00:04:23,658 --> 00:04:24,845
This pleases me.
123
00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:26,790
You two have shown me great respect.
124
00:04:26,858 --> 00:04:28,675
Oh, hey, can I try out your ring?
125
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,144
["Love Theme from The Godfather" plays]
126
00:04:31,263 --> 00:04:32,796
[Ring whirring]
127
00:04:32,898 --> 00:04:36,966
♪
128
00:04:37,019 --> 00:04:39,202
MELISSA: I know what you're
thinking, but no,
129
00:04:39,271 --> 00:04:41,371
this wasn't done
by professional carpenters.
130
00:04:41,423 --> 00:04:45,342
It's terrible, but your wheel
will definitely help.
131
00:04:49,448 --> 00:04:51,681
For the record, I wanted to do
a bake sale.
132
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:54,017
SISTER EUPHEMIA:
Hold the work backstage!
133
00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:57,787
The artists are attempting
to engage the muse.
134
00:04:57,873 --> 00:04:59,622
From the fourth bar.
135
00:04:59,691 --> 00:05:03,360
Gaylord and Magnolia,
feeling the first tender shoots
136
00:05:03,412 --> 00:05:05,328
- of love's flowering.
- [Piano plays]
137
00:05:05,414 --> 00:05:10,100
TOGETHER: ♪ Might as well make believe ♪
138
00:05:10,168 --> 00:05:17,574
♪ I love you ♪
139
00:05:17,659 --> 00:05:22,846
♪ For to tell the truth ♪
140
00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:30,937
♪ I do ♪
141
00:05:31,022 --> 00:05:32,922
Lovely, children.
142
00:05:33,024 --> 00:05:35,358
Nice working with you, kiddo.
You've got some chops.
143
00:05:35,427 --> 00:05:37,093
We might want to speak to costumes
144
00:05:37,145 --> 00:05:38,678
about getting you some lifts.
145
00:05:40,682 --> 00:05:42,331
There goes our money
for the soccer team.
146
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:43,966
I should've gone to public school.
147
00:05:44,019 --> 00:05:45,769
They have Title IX, pizza Fridays,
148
00:05:45,871 --> 00:05:47,703
and other black people.
149
00:05:47,756 --> 00:05:49,372
We'll never be ready by show night.
150
00:05:49,424 --> 00:05:51,841
What if we went at this differently?
151
00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:54,527
- Like a bake sale?
- Forget the three-dimensional boat,
152
00:05:54,613 --> 00:05:56,379
we could do something
lightweight in two dimensions
153
00:05:56,431 --> 00:05:59,149
- and suspend it from a traverse rod.
- That sounds smart.
154
00:05:59,234 --> 00:06:02,285
I placed in the 76th percentile
in Engineering and Physics.
155
00:06:02,370 --> 00:06:05,221
I would go with 2/10 scale
with a forced perspective.
156
00:06:05,273 --> 00:06:07,524
We'll build the ship...
157
00:06:07,559 --> 00:06:12,595
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine...
158
00:06:12,681 --> 00:06:14,264
10 Frank's feet long.
159
00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:16,699
That sounds great, but we don't
have time to start over.
160
00:06:16,802 --> 00:06:18,785
We do if I help,
and we keep it very simple.
161
00:06:18,904 --> 00:06:21,137
We need a steam whistle,
smoke machine, lots of lights,
162
00:06:21,239 --> 00:06:22,439
and a rotating paddle wheel.
163
00:06:22,524 --> 00:06:24,274
Your set will look like a million bucks.
164
00:06:24,376 --> 00:06:25,575
We have ten.
165
00:06:25,660 --> 00:06:27,310
Eight. I bought gum for the crew.
166
00:06:29,631 --> 00:06:31,614
Where on Earth are you
coming from, Frank?
167
00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:33,149
I swear I heard you
cleaning the gutters,
168
00:06:33,235 --> 00:06:34,751
stomping around up there.
169
00:06:34,820 --> 00:06:36,753
That possum must be putting on weight.
170
00:06:36,822 --> 00:06:39,088
Sorry, Mom, I stuck around
to help work on Timmy's sets.
171
00:06:39,157 --> 00:06:40,523
Every day you put the gutters off,
172
00:06:40,609 --> 00:06:42,225
that possum becomes
a more formidable foe.
173
00:06:42,310 --> 00:06:44,160
Why can't somebody else
do the gutters, like Lawrence?
174
00:06:44,262 --> 00:06:45,662
'Cause I told you to do it.
175
00:06:45,714 --> 00:06:47,297
Yeah. Plus, I have that inner-ear thing.
176
00:06:47,382 --> 00:06:49,799
Whenever I go up on a ladder,
my inner ear hears the words,
177
00:06:49,901 --> 00:06:51,534
"This seems like a Frank job."
178
00:06:51,636 --> 00:06:54,037
Mom, guess what?
I'm playing two roles now.
179
00:06:54,139 --> 00:06:55,905
They asked me to also play
Stevedore Joe,
180
00:06:55,974 --> 00:06:57,540
so I get to sing "Old Man River"!
181
00:06:57,642 --> 00:06:58,975
Isn't Joe an Afro-American?
182
00:06:59,077 --> 00:07:01,244
It'll be my greatest acting challenge.
183
00:07:01,279 --> 00:07:04,030
But no black-face. That's
considered in poor taste now.
184
00:07:04,115 --> 00:07:06,182
- Very good, Mom.
- Hmm. Heard that
185
00:07:06,284 --> 00:07:08,234
- from an Oriental.
- Eh, there it is.
186
00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:10,854
So, I'm thinking I want to keep
helping the girls with the set.
187
00:07:10,906 --> 00:07:13,907
- They really like my ideas.
- Ideas.
188
00:07:13,992 --> 00:07:16,075
No, I have much too much work
for you to do around here.
189
00:07:16,161 --> 00:07:17,760
Besides, I only have room in this family
190
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:19,295
for one insufferable show-off.
191
00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,314
- Forward roll!
- [Telephone ringing]
192
00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:23,065
Here we go. [Laughs]
193
00:07:23,118 --> 00:07:25,285
- Oh!
- Wow.
194
00:07:25,370 --> 00:07:26,903
- Cleary residence.
- Hey, Frank.
195
00:07:27,005 --> 00:07:28,605
- Oh, hi, Wendi.
- Hey, thanks again
196
00:07:28,707 --> 00:07:29,873
for all your help today.
197
00:07:29,975 --> 00:07:32,709
Yeah, about that. I'm not sure...
198
00:07:32,811 --> 00:07:34,683
Oh, we're asking too much, aren't we?
199
00:07:34,707 --> 00:07:35,619
N...
200
00:07:35,644 --> 00:07:37,931
I-I understand.
It's just watching you today,
201
00:07:38,016 --> 00:07:39,816
all lit up with inspiration,
202
00:07:39,901 --> 00:07:41,484
this show started to get fun again.
203
00:07:41,570 --> 00:07:43,353
Well, it's just I'm not sure...
204
00:07:43,438 --> 00:07:46,689
- [Laughs]
- Hey, hey.
205
00:07:46,775 --> 00:07:48,057
- Whup!
- Nice!
206
00:07:48,159 --> 00:07:49,609
...how I'll be able to sleep tonight,
207
00:07:49,694 --> 00:07:51,027
dreaming about
putting that boat together.
208
00:07:51,112 --> 00:07:54,230
- See you tomorrow, Wendi.
- Is that my girlfriend?
209
00:07:54,332 --> 00:07:56,499
Sorry you had to talk to Frank.
210
00:07:56,585 --> 00:08:00,012
[Gags] Now the receiver
smells like Frank breath.
211
00:08:03,614 --> 00:08:06,991
♪ You an' me, we sweat an' strain ♪
212
00:08:07,054 --> 00:08:10,561
To get away with defying Mom,
Frank had to work double-duty,
213
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,034
still executing all her heinous chores
214
00:08:13,143 --> 00:08:16,127
and then secretly slipping away
to build sets with Wendi.
215
00:08:16,213 --> 00:08:21,349
♪ An' you land in jaaaaiiiil... ♪
216
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:24,252
[Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" plays]
217
00:08:24,321 --> 00:08:32,360
♪
218
00:08:32,412 --> 00:08:34,512
What's up? Besides us.
219
00:08:34,598 --> 00:08:37,165
- Ha!
- No horseplay! I'm on a ladder.
220
00:08:37,234 --> 00:08:38,566
Where did you get the scissor lift?
221
00:08:38,669 --> 00:08:40,168
If I tell you, everyone gets one,
222
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,170
then they're not cool anymore.
223
00:08:42,272 --> 00:08:43,742
That looks like pretty grim work.
224
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:45,946
It's not bad, except for
the baby bird skeletons,
225
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:47,977
but I get the satisfaction
of helping Mom.
226
00:08:48,040 --> 00:08:50,680
More satisfaction than helping
those girls from the play
227
00:08:50,776 --> 00:08:53,994
who are your own age
and not related to you?
228
00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:56,881
Entertainment folk with their
free and easy ways...
229
00:08:56,983 --> 00:08:58,549
Nobody's "free and easy."
230
00:08:58,651 --> 00:09:00,885
They're nice girls who
just want to play soccer.
231
00:09:00,953 --> 00:09:03,387
- ["Love Theme from The Godfather" plays]
- How about I take over here for you
232
00:09:03,456 --> 00:09:05,906
so you can go hang out
with your show folk?
233
00:09:05,992 --> 00:09:08,626
Then one day, you can do a favor for me.
234
00:09:08,728 --> 00:09:11,829
♪
235
00:09:11,931 --> 00:09:13,714
Okay.
236
00:09:13,799 --> 00:09:16,283
But if isn't done to perfection,
Mom'll know it wasn't me.
237
00:09:16,402 --> 00:09:18,269
Relax, I'll do it exactly like someone
238
00:09:18,294 --> 00:09:20,069
who is weirdly obsessed with
the approval of his mother.
239
00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:21,327
You better.
240
00:09:25,678 --> 00:09:26,894
[Brakes squeal]
241
00:09:28,948 --> 00:09:30,915
["Drunken Sailor" plays]
242
00:09:34,186 --> 00:09:35,386
[Tires squeal]
243
00:09:35,488 --> 00:09:36,787
[Door closes]
244
00:09:36,856 --> 00:09:38,522
Where'd that thing come from?
245
00:09:38,558 --> 00:09:40,224
I know a guy who knows a guy.
246
00:09:40,326 --> 00:09:41,892
In court they're called accomplices.
247
00:09:41,994 --> 00:09:44,428
Get down from there.
You and I are going for seafood.
248
00:09:48,668 --> 00:09:50,267
Hey, you know that favor you owe me?
249
00:09:50,369 --> 00:09:51,969
I need it right now, and fast.
250
00:09:52,021 --> 00:09:54,488
You think something like this
is a harmless prank,
251
00:09:54,607 --> 00:09:57,258
but folks have gone to jail for less.
252
00:09:57,343 --> 00:10:00,227
- I don't want to go to jail.
- No, you don't.
253
00:10:00,313 --> 00:10:03,230
There are much better ways
to see Johnny Cash for free.
254
00:10:03,316 --> 00:10:05,783
But maybe if you and I go in the
restaurant and you apologize,
255
00:10:05,851 --> 00:10:06,784
we can smooth this over.
256
00:10:06,886 --> 00:10:09,119
Okay.
257
00:10:09,221 --> 00:10:10,888
But what am I apologizing for?
258
00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:12,456
Seriously?
259
00:10:12,525 --> 00:10:14,124
You're gonna sit there and deny
that you stole that?
260
00:10:15,561 --> 00:10:17,761
Stole what?
261
00:10:17,863 --> 00:10:20,931
["Drunken Sailor" plays]
262
00:10:21,017 --> 00:10:23,367
That wasn't there before.
263
00:10:23,452 --> 00:10:24,768
[Tires squeal]
264
00:10:24,870 --> 00:10:27,471
♪
265
00:10:27,573 --> 00:10:29,773
Let's go. Come on.
266
00:10:29,842 --> 00:10:32,472
Just point it at the backdrop and...
267
00:10:32,527 --> 00:10:34,028
[Button clicks, projector whirring]
268
00:10:34,146 --> 00:10:37,481
WENDI: Wow! So pretty, Frank.
269
00:10:37,550 --> 00:10:39,516
You're an artist.
270
00:10:39,619 --> 00:10:41,418
Is that somebody surfing
on the Mississippi River?
271
00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,354
Oh, I shot this at Zuma Beach.
272
00:10:43,422 --> 00:10:44,805
We can splice that out.
273
00:10:44,890 --> 00:10:46,290
You should be really proud.
274
00:10:46,392 --> 00:10:48,575
I mean, you built a really great set.
275
00:10:48,661 --> 00:10:50,861
And more importantly,
got Melissa to stop yapping
276
00:10:50,963 --> 00:10:52,295
about her bake sale.
277
00:10:52,348 --> 00:10:53,597
I'm selling cupcakes in the lobby.
278
00:10:53,649 --> 00:10:55,065
I don't care what anybody says.
279
00:10:55,117 --> 00:10:57,167
- Places for dress rehearsal!
- [Piano plays]
280
00:10:57,269 --> 00:11:04,341
♪ Only make believe I love you... ♪
281
00:11:04,443 --> 00:11:06,944
♪ Only make believe ♪
282
00:11:07,046 --> 00:11:09,813
♪ That you love me ♪
283
00:11:09,849 --> 00:11:13,200
- [Horn blowing]
- TOGETHER: ♪ Others find peace of mind ♪
284
00:11:13,285 --> 00:11:16,303
- ♪ In pretending... ♪
- [Applause, scattered cheers]
285
00:11:16,389 --> 00:11:19,056
TIMMY: ♪ Couldn't you? ♪
286
00:11:19,125 --> 00:11:21,175
MAGNOLIA: ♪ Couldn't I? ♪
287
00:11:21,293 --> 00:11:25,062
TOGETHER: ♪ Couldn't we... ♪
288
00:11:25,114 --> 00:11:27,898
- ♪ Make... ♪
- There I was, singing my guts out,
289
00:11:27,923 --> 00:11:30,008
and all anyone was looking at
was Frank's stupid boat.
290
00:11:30,039 --> 00:11:31,283
[Crowd chanting]: Frank!
291
00:11:31,307 --> 00:11:32,954
My pride kept me
from caring what they thought...
292
00:11:32,955 --> 00:11:36,073
- or it would have if I had any.
- Forward roll!
293
00:11:36,142 --> 00:11:38,908
[Chanting continues]
294
00:11:41,213 --> 00:11:43,681
[Cheers]
295
00:11:47,586 --> 00:11:50,721
Look, all I'm asking is you tone
down the effects tomorrow night
296
00:11:50,773 --> 00:11:52,423
so the audience notices I'm there.
297
00:11:52,491 --> 00:11:54,692
Actors, they always think
they're the ones
298
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,594
people come to see,
but the star tonight was my set.
299
00:11:57,663 --> 00:12:00,114
And me! I play the boat!
300
00:12:00,199 --> 00:12:02,866
Okay, the stage crew
liked it, sure, but tomorrow
301
00:12:02,968 --> 00:12:05,135
is a paying audience of
soccer team boosters...
302
00:12:05,204 --> 00:12:07,938
a more sophisticated, European crowd.
303
00:12:08,007 --> 00:12:09,473
I'm not changing a thing.
304
00:12:09,542 --> 00:12:11,708
It's called "Show Boat," not Show Timmy.
305
00:12:11,811 --> 00:12:13,644
Frank had gotten his first
taste of that fleeting,
306
00:12:13,696 --> 00:12:15,946
shallow showbiz glory
that feels so much better
307
00:12:15,981 --> 00:12:17,147
than actual love,
308
00:12:17,199 --> 00:12:18,866
but it was supposed to mine.
309
00:12:18,951 --> 00:12:21,785
And in taking it,
he had made a powerful enemy.
310
00:12:21,887 --> 00:12:24,655
Hey, Dad, why don't you
get out that projector
311
00:12:24,757 --> 00:12:26,690
and show us those home movies
you took at the air show?
312
00:12:27,827 --> 00:12:29,560
Outstanding idea.
313
00:12:29,662 --> 00:12:31,645
- Mm-hmm.
- Buckle up, kids.
314
00:12:31,731 --> 00:12:34,564
Tonight we are soaring
with the Blue Angels!
315
00:12:34,667 --> 00:12:36,199
[Laughs]
316
00:12:36,302 --> 00:12:37,551
His air show movies?
317
00:12:37,670 --> 00:12:39,369
Really? Why would you do that to us?
318
00:12:39,438 --> 00:12:41,655
I'll have to find my glasses
with the fake open eyes.
319
00:12:41,741 --> 00:12:44,208
We all agreed we'd only let him
show those on Father's Day
320
00:12:44,276 --> 00:12:45,943
and only if we forgot to get him a card.
321
00:12:45,978 --> 00:12:47,194
And ever since we made that rule,
322
00:12:47,279 --> 00:12:49,046
we have never forgotten the card.
323
00:12:49,115 --> 00:12:51,148
Oh, come on. Those movies aren't so bad,
324
00:12:51,250 --> 00:12:52,883
and it makes your dad happy
when we watch 'em together.
325
00:12:52,968 --> 00:12:54,384
- I'll be in the kitchen.
- MIKE: Peg!
326
00:12:54,470 --> 00:12:57,054
My Bell and Howell projector is gone!
327
00:12:57,123 --> 00:12:59,423
Well, things have a way of
disappearing around this house.
328
00:12:59,508 --> 00:13:02,643
I can't keep a bra catalogue!
329
00:13:02,728 --> 00:13:03,977
Your projector is missing?
330
00:13:04,063 --> 00:13:05,695
- I don't know.
- That's strange.
331
00:13:05,748 --> 00:13:07,464
I might know who had something
to do with this.
332
00:13:07,550 --> 00:13:09,500
Joey!
333
00:13:09,602 --> 00:13:11,151
You know anything about
my missing projector?
334
00:13:11,270 --> 00:13:13,570
No, Pop, but I can ask
Mousey and Ray-Ray
335
00:13:13,672 --> 00:13:15,572
- to check the word on the street.
- Or maybe I can call the police
336
00:13:15,674 --> 00:13:17,107
and have them search the premises,
337
00:13:17,209 --> 00:13:18,776
including a certain, uh, tree house.
338
00:13:18,861 --> 00:13:21,612
You don't have to call the police.
339
00:13:21,697 --> 00:13:23,247
- I took your projector.
- You took it?
340
00:13:23,349 --> 00:13:25,249
I'm using it for special effects
in "Show Boat."
341
00:13:25,351 --> 00:13:27,384
Oh, maybe we should've
taken you to the doctor
342
00:13:27,436 --> 00:13:29,219
when you failed that hearing
test at school and they said
343
00:13:29,271 --> 00:13:31,638
it might be something serious,
because I specifically told you
344
00:13:31,724 --> 00:13:34,424
- not to work on "Show Boat."
- I know, but I-I...
345
00:13:34,510 --> 00:13:37,638
I like it. I'm good at it,
and it makes me happy.
346
00:13:37,662 --> 00:13:38,722
Is that the groovy, new trend now?
347
00:13:38,747 --> 00:13:41,365
Everyone doing things that
they're good at and being happy?
348
00:13:41,467 --> 00:13:43,100
Plus the people there
show me appreciation,
349
00:13:43,185 --> 00:13:44,501
which never happens around here.
350
00:13:44,553 --> 00:13:45,903
Hey, pal, your appreciation is
351
00:13:45,971 --> 00:13:47,538
that we haven't sold you to the Gypsies.
352
00:13:47,623 --> 00:13:49,540
Yeah, I'm starting to wonder
what's really going on...
353
00:13:49,642 --> 00:13:51,141
if this sudden interest in theater
354
00:13:51,243 --> 00:13:52,642
is really an interest in those girls?
355
00:13:52,745 --> 00:13:53,944
- What?!
- Mm-hmm.
356
00:13:54,029 --> 00:13:55,329
[Scoffs]
357
00:13:55,414 --> 00:13:57,314
No! Wh-What's going on here
358
00:13:57,416 --> 00:13:59,216
is you can't stand me doing
something away from you
359
00:13:59,285 --> 00:14:00,684
that isn't under your thumb!
360
00:14:00,769 --> 00:14:03,387
I'm just trying to protect you
from making a fool of yourself.
361
00:14:03,489 --> 00:14:05,188
The only thing you're protecting me from
362
00:14:05,241 --> 00:14:06,790
is having my own life
363
00:14:06,876 --> 00:14:08,342
because it means maybe someday
364
00:14:08,460 --> 00:14:10,660
I won't be at your beck and call!
365
00:14:10,763 --> 00:14:13,330
You're so afraid to go out
in the world and do things,
366
00:14:13,432 --> 00:14:15,966
you just want the rest of us to be
as afraid of the world as you are.
367
00:14:16,051 --> 00:14:18,635
- Hey, knock it off!
- Well, I'm not afraid!
368
00:14:18,721 --> 00:14:20,470
And I'm not afraid of you.
369
00:14:24,276 --> 00:14:26,026
I'm still scared of you, Mom.
370
00:14:26,145 --> 00:14:28,127
Thank you, William.
371
00:14:28,221 --> 00:14:29,986
You always know just what to say.
372
00:14:31,276 --> 00:14:33,025
Once the idea
of watching air show movies
373
00:14:33,104 --> 00:14:34,830
got into his head,
my dad couldn't sleep.
374
00:14:34,877 --> 00:14:37,361
And he wasn't about to let the
lack of a projector stop him.
375
00:14:37,432 --> 00:14:40,466
Ooh, delta formation.
376
00:14:40,552 --> 00:14:42,220
Such precision.
377
00:14:42,283 --> 00:14:44,653
Whoa, they're flying backwards.
378
00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:47,255
There you go.
379
00:14:47,357 --> 00:14:48,607
[Thud in distance]
380
00:14:48,725 --> 00:14:50,859
[Dog barking in distance]
381
00:14:51,084 --> 00:14:54,418
["Drunken Sailor" plays]
382
00:14:55,491 --> 00:14:58,526
Ahoy, buttheads. King crabs,
straight from Seafood Fart.
383
00:14:58,551 --> 00:15:00,410
Seriously bummed to see that "O" back.
384
00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:02,159
Pull up the ladder in case of visitors.
385
00:15:02,184 --> 00:15:03,653
My brother Pat climbs in his sleep.
386
00:15:03,677 --> 00:15:05,640
One of the crabs got away from me
when I was locking up my bike.
387
00:15:05,742 --> 00:15:07,582
They trick you by running sideways.
388
00:15:07,667 --> 00:15:09,714
- [Door closes]
- Wow. These are almost as nice
389
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:11,464
- as the crabs I got from your sister.
- [Laughter]
390
00:15:11,542 --> 00:15:13,617
- I don't have a sister.
- You have any girl cousins?
391
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:15,109
- Yeah.
- Then it works.
392
00:15:15,194 --> 00:15:16,921
- [Laughter]
- Where were we? Oh, yeah,
393
00:15:17,006 --> 00:15:18,911
I believe this is mine.
394
00:15:18,965 --> 00:15:21,159
Again? Seriously?
395
00:15:21,244 --> 00:15:23,387
Oh, you'll have a chance to win it back.
396
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:26,429
- Five card stud.
- Look what I found in my tree...
397
00:15:26,453 --> 00:15:28,780
some delinquent Keebler Elves.
398
00:15:28,835 --> 00:15:31,687
Dad, you can't just barge in
on a man's tree house.
399
00:15:31,749 --> 00:15:33,037
I could've legally shot you.
400
00:15:33,108 --> 00:15:36,109
[Grunts] My tree, my rules.
401
00:15:36,212 --> 00:15:39,780
- Hi, Mr. Cleary.
- Stay for a while, son.
402
00:15:39,849 --> 00:15:43,166
I'm hurt you didn't invite me
to your party.
403
00:15:43,252 --> 00:15:44,818
You'll note mine's a cream soda.
404
00:15:44,887 --> 00:15:46,954
I-I was planning on doing some
scissor lifting later.
405
00:15:47,022 --> 00:15:49,523
You do realize gambling's
illegal in this state?
406
00:15:49,625 --> 00:15:52,693
T-True, but we're 14 feet
off the ground,
407
00:15:52,761 --> 00:15:54,795
so technically,
we're subject to astronaut law.
408
00:15:54,897 --> 00:15:56,730
DAVEY: We don't always play
for money, Mr. Cleary.
409
00:15:56,799 --> 00:15:58,582
A lot of the times,
Joey forgives our debts
410
00:15:58,667 --> 00:15:59,800
if we're able to offer him a favor.
411
00:15:59,885 --> 00:16:01,869
I got him that scissor lift
from my dad's job site.
412
00:16:01,937 --> 00:16:04,738
Mm. Looks like you called in
a lot of favors.
413
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:07,424
I see radial tires, olive oil,
414
00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:09,776
a wiggling sack of something.
415
00:16:09,862 --> 00:16:11,378
As a responsible father,
416
00:16:11,447 --> 00:16:13,714
there's only one way
for me to handle this.
417
00:16:15,284 --> 00:16:16,450
Deal me in.
418
00:16:16,485 --> 00:16:17,985
[Chuckles]
419
00:16:18,037 --> 00:16:18,785
DAVEY: Uh...
420
00:16:18,871 --> 00:16:20,621
♪
421
00:16:20,673 --> 00:16:23,624
Here's a little something
I call the "Cleary"
422
00:16:23,692 --> 00:16:26,059
because it's a...
423
00:16:26,161 --> 00:16:27,227
full house.
424
00:16:27,279 --> 00:16:30,514
Poor me with only two pair...
425
00:16:30,599 --> 00:16:31,765
of the same thing.
426
00:16:31,834 --> 00:16:34,067
- ["Drunken Sailor" plays]
- That's better, isn't it?
427
00:16:34,169 --> 00:16:35,836
[Laughs]
428
00:16:35,921 --> 00:16:37,638
This feels like a good stopping point.
429
00:16:37,723 --> 00:16:40,324
- Because you have all the money!
- [Laughing] Yeah!
430
00:16:40,409 --> 00:16:41,942
I mean, you're not seriously keeping it?
431
00:16:41,994 --> 00:16:43,777
Uh, uh, your goal was to teach
me a lesson, right?
432
00:16:43,879 --> 00:16:45,579
Yeah, I like to get paid for my lessons.
433
00:16:45,681 --> 00:16:47,514
I won this by cheating fair and square.
434
00:16:47,583 --> 00:16:49,316
You cheated?
435
00:16:49,368 --> 00:16:51,618
Yeah. [Chuckles]
436
00:16:53,522 --> 00:16:54,771
But it's okay,
437
00:16:54,857 --> 00:16:57,958
because we're under astronaut law.
438
00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:02,062
- [Switch engages]
- T-minus 10... 9...
439
00:17:02,164 --> 00:17:05,432
8... 7...
440
00:17:05,501 --> 00:17:07,367
It was finally show night.
441
00:17:07,469 --> 00:17:10,470
A battle royale between me
and a cardboard boat.
442
00:17:10,522 --> 00:17:13,307
Fortunately, I had a secret
weapon up my sleeve.
443
00:17:13,409 --> 00:17:14,708
[Lighter clicking]
444
00:17:14,810 --> 00:17:17,711
- Timmy, I need to talk to you.
- Uh, s-s-sure... sure.
445
00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:19,980
I guess Mom isn't coming tonight
because of our fight.
446
00:17:20,032 --> 00:17:22,883
Sorry about that. I know how her
approval means a lot to you.
447
00:17:22,952 --> 00:17:25,018
I think I understand now
what it's like for you,
448
00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:26,619
doing something that inspires you
449
00:17:26,722 --> 00:17:29,940
while other people crap on it
and try to hold you back.
450
00:17:30,025 --> 00:17:31,692
Other people like me.
451
00:17:31,794 --> 00:17:33,493
You have been
one of my harshest critics.
452
00:17:33,595 --> 00:17:35,312
You and that smug second grader
453
00:17:35,431 --> 00:17:37,064
who writes those reviews
for the school paper.
454
00:17:37,166 --> 00:17:38,932
Well, she's a hack.
455
00:17:39,034 --> 00:17:40,484
Good luck tonight.
456
00:17:41,704 --> 00:17:43,337
Frank.
457
00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:47,207
I asked Dad to show us
his home movies last night
458
00:17:47,309 --> 00:17:49,776
so Mom would find out and stop
you from doing the show.
459
00:17:49,878 --> 00:17:51,912
I was jealous of your set
for upstaging me.
460
00:17:52,014 --> 00:17:54,914
- I'm sorry.
- That's okay.
461
00:17:54,967 --> 00:17:57,351
If you hadn't done that, I might
never have stood up to Mom.
462
00:17:58,354 --> 00:17:59,519
I can't believe you were jealous.
463
00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:01,204
No one's ever been jealous of me before.
464
00:18:01,323 --> 00:18:03,657
Except for Mrs. Strausser,
who raves about my skin.
465
00:18:03,726 --> 00:18:06,309
I'm not proud of what I did, Frank.
466
00:18:06,428 --> 00:18:07,894
Mostly because it didn't work.
467
00:18:07,997 --> 00:18:10,864
[Both laugh]
468
00:18:10,966 --> 00:18:14,167
Seriously, I wish it had
worked. I hated that damn boat.
469
00:18:14,269 --> 00:18:17,604
♪ Ol' man river ♪
470
00:18:17,673 --> 00:18:20,974
♪ Dat ol' man river ♪
471
00:18:21,043 --> 00:18:24,044
- [Horn blowing]
- ♪ He mus' know sumpin' ♪
472
00:18:24,129 --> 00:18:27,881
♪ But don't say nuthin' ♪
473
00:18:27,950 --> 00:18:31,334
- ♪ He jes' keeps rollin' along ♪
- Dr. King did not march for this.
474
00:18:31,453 --> 00:18:33,804
Just picture those shin guards.
475
00:18:33,889 --> 00:18:36,790
[Applause, cheering]
476
00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:42,963
[Door closes]
477
00:18:43,048 --> 00:18:45,382
♪
478
00:18:45,467 --> 00:18:48,035
I brought Dad's projector back.
479
00:18:48,137 --> 00:18:50,337
Didn't go to the cast party
with your new theater friends?
480
00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:54,007
Meeting up in some coffee house,
wear berets, and play bongos?
481
00:18:54,076 --> 00:18:56,009
They're mostly just a soccer team.
482
00:18:56,111 --> 00:18:57,911
We had orange slices at intermission.
483
00:18:59,965 --> 00:19:01,548
I brought you this.
484
00:19:01,633 --> 00:19:03,083
A program from the show.
485
00:19:03,185 --> 00:19:04,885
They put my name in there.
486
00:19:07,740 --> 00:19:11,024
Some of what you said last night...
487
00:19:11,126 --> 00:19:12,225
might be true.
488
00:19:14,063 --> 00:19:17,731
About me sometimes holding you back.
489
00:19:17,783 --> 00:19:19,766
Then again, it's only natural.
490
00:19:19,868 --> 00:19:21,451
Every parent wants their
children to end up
491
00:19:21,537 --> 00:19:23,070
just a little less happy than they are.
492
00:19:23,172 --> 00:19:24,738
I'm not sure that's universal, Mom.
493
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:27,874
What do I know?
I grew up in a different time.
494
00:19:27,976 --> 00:19:30,510
Expectations for girls
weren't set that high.
495
00:19:30,612 --> 00:19:34,614
And I met your father, and then
along came all you kids.
496
00:19:34,716 --> 00:19:37,551
Eight needy nails in my
hopes and dreams coffin.
497
00:19:41,623 --> 00:19:45,759
But I guess I could try to be
a little bit more encouraging.
498
00:19:47,513 --> 00:19:49,262
Let you boys march out into the world
499
00:19:49,348 --> 00:19:51,014
with sky-high expectations.
500
00:19:51,100 --> 00:19:53,934
And if they don't work out,
I'll be here for you.
501
00:19:54,019 --> 00:19:56,186
To come crawling back to.
502
00:19:56,271 --> 00:19:57,804
To tell me I was right.
503
00:19:57,906 --> 00:20:00,440
Or if they do work out,
504
00:20:00,526 --> 00:20:03,110
we can come back to say thank you.
505
00:20:05,948 --> 00:20:07,280
I love you, Mom.
506
00:20:07,366 --> 00:20:09,616
[Scoffing]
507
00:20:09,701 --> 00:20:11,118
That word.
508
00:20:11,203 --> 00:20:12,786
You're probably starving.
509
00:20:12,871 --> 00:20:15,525
I'm gonna heat you up
a Hungry-Man dinner.
510
00:20:15,621 --> 00:20:19,456
It's a new one... Mexican enchiladas.
511
00:20:23,260 --> 00:20:25,479
- Hey, you see that one?
- Sure.
512
00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:27,124
X-27 Lancer.
513
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,563
Any idea how many Gs
that baby's pulling?
514
00:20:29,656 --> 00:20:31,628
I don't know. 3?
515
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:32,946
A million?
516
00:20:35,501 --> 00:20:37,968
What's this nonsense?
517
00:20:38,054 --> 00:20:40,104
Barry's Barnstormers
was supposed to be up next.
518
00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:44,108
These look like the movies that
William took of Timmy's show.
519
00:20:44,233 --> 00:20:47,234
Geez Louise, this looks amazing!
520
00:20:47,336 --> 00:20:51,371
It's not the "Crowned Clowns
of the Air," but... not bad.
521
00:20:51,473 --> 00:20:53,707
Well, we all knew Timmy
had a dose of creativity,
522
00:20:53,801 --> 00:20:55,889
but it looks like we have a second son
523
00:20:55,928 --> 00:20:57,959
- with a budding talent.
- Huh.
524
00:20:59,157 --> 00:21:02,732
I'm thinking William could
really be a filmmaker one day.
525
00:21:04,786 --> 00:21:08,686
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
40595
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