All language subtitles for late.bloomer.s01e02

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian Download
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,327 --> 00:00:20,997 When did a fast food combo become $18? 2 00:00:20,997 --> 00:00:22,765 You know what I mean, like, this shit isn't gourmet. 3 00:00:22,765 --> 00:00:24,500 My parents immigrated over here, 4 00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:26,169 just like every other immigrant, 5 00:00:26,169 --> 00:00:27,770 didn't speak the language, 6 00:00:27,770 --> 00:00:29,005 had to work shitty jobs and long hours 7 00:00:29,005 --> 00:00:32,442 to provide a better life for us just to have us 8 00:00:32,442 --> 00:00:34,343 sitting here eating some bland-ass chicken sandwich 9 00:00:34,343 --> 00:00:36,345 that I can't even afford? 10 00:00:36,345 --> 00:00:38,014 Was this really the dream? 11 00:00:38,014 --> 00:00:40,016 The rich keep getting richer, 12 00:00:40,016 --> 00:00:42,018 and making us buy pointless shit. 13 00:00:42,018 --> 00:00:43,886 then blaming us for being poor 14 00:00:43,886 --> 00:00:46,355 for making us buy said pointless shit. 15 00:00:46,355 --> 00:00:49,025 You got rich and built this country 16 00:00:49,025 --> 00:00:52,528 off of stealing resources and wealth from our ancestors, 17 00:00:52,528 --> 00:00:54,730 which turned us into, like, developing nations, 18 00:00:54,730 --> 00:00:57,233 then we had to emigrate our asses over here 19 00:00:57,233 --> 00:00:59,902 just to be duped again and continue staying broke? 20 00:01:01,471 --> 00:01:02,538 Oh. 21 00:01:02,538 --> 00:01:03,639 The or-- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 22 00:01:03,639 --> 00:01:05,475 Um, what'd you get? 23 00:01:05,475 --> 00:01:06,742 Saag paneer, right? 24 00:01:09,312 --> 00:01:11,013 Yup, this is it. Here you go. 25 00:01:11,013 --> 00:01:12,849 Thanks. Have a nice day. Enjoy. 26 00:01:14,050 --> 00:01:16,719 Can someone help me go viral 27 00:01:16,719 --> 00:01:20,022 so then I can help myself not be broke anymore? 28 00:01:20,022 --> 00:01:21,557 This shit is so disgusting! 29 00:01:28,598 --> 00:01:30,099 Okay, I'm done my deliveries. 30 00:01:30,099 --> 00:01:31,267 {\an8}I'm just going to get my backpack 31 00:01:31,267 --> 00:01:32,435 {\an8}and I'm gonna go downtown. 32 00:01:33,903 --> 00:01:35,538 {\an8}What? No. I'll go grab it after. 33 00:01:35,538 --> 00:01:36,672 {\an8}Who's car is that outside? 34 00:01:42,545 --> 00:01:44,046 The thing that I have to go to downtown. 35 00:01:44,046 --> 00:01:45,681 The seminar for my work? It's important? 36 00:01:45,681 --> 00:01:46,782 - Seminar? - Yeah. 37 00:01:48,184 --> 00:01:50,086 - Five. - Five? 38 00:01:55,858 --> 00:01:58,261 It takes only five minutes. Go. 39 00:02:05,067 --> 00:02:08,971 Wow. These look so expensive. 40 00:02:13,109 --> 00:02:14,577 So, this is like, uh, small potatoes. 41 00:02:14,577 --> 00:02:15,578 Ah, small aloos. 42 00:02:20,550 --> 00:02:21,984 Hey, man. What brings you out here? 43 00:02:21,984 --> 00:02:24,253 My brother, what is good? 44 00:02:24,253 --> 00:02:26,455 Ah, just showing some potential wedding cards. 45 00:02:26,455 --> 00:02:28,958 Isn't it too soon to be looking into all of this? 46 00:02:28,958 --> 00:02:30,259 Well, it doesn't hurt to be prepared. 47 00:02:31,661 --> 00:02:34,997 Say, would you be down to play tabla at the Sangeet? 48 00:02:34,997 --> 00:02:37,300 I mean, I got a ghazal singer and all, world-renowned. 49 00:02:37,300 --> 00:02:38,834 Absolutely amazing. 50 00:02:38,834 --> 00:02:41,671 Only works with his own people, but I insisted you play. 51 00:02:41,671 --> 00:02:43,406 If that's okay with you, of course. 52 00:02:47,176 --> 00:02:49,312 Yeah, why ask? 53 00:02:49,312 --> 00:02:50,746 Well, I am younger. 54 00:02:50,746 --> 00:02:51,847 By a month. 55 00:02:51,847 --> 00:02:53,249 So? Gotta respect my elders. 56 00:02:54,584 --> 00:02:57,019 Uh, yeah, sure. No problem, man. 57 00:02:57,019 --> 00:02:58,087 All right. 58 00:02:58,087 --> 00:02:59,622 But look, dude, I gotta head out. 59 00:02:59,622 --> 00:03:02,158 Good seeing you again. I got this big thing downtown, so-- 60 00:03:02,158 --> 00:03:03,159 I could drop you off. 61 00:03:03,159 --> 00:03:05,328 Oh, no, no, no. You're good, man. 62 00:03:05,328 --> 00:03:08,698 You sure? Give you a chance to check out that new, uh, whip. 63 00:03:08,698 --> 00:03:09,765 Mercedes? 64 00:03:11,467 --> 00:03:13,469 {\an8}Jaspreet: Yeah, yeah, yeah... 65 00:03:16,339 --> 00:03:17,673 {\an8}...why not treat myself? 66 00:03:33,022 --> 00:03:35,524 Announcer: Welcome to the stage, Richard Braxton! 67 00:03:39,729 --> 00:03:41,130 New media pioneers. 68 00:03:41,130 --> 00:03:43,566 Podcast renaissancers. 69 00:03:43,566 --> 00:03:45,868 Vlogging visionaries. 70 00:03:45,868 --> 00:03:47,403 I'm Richard Braxton, 71 00:03:47,403 --> 00:03:50,673 head of creator relations at Influenceza, 72 00:03:50,673 --> 00:03:54,143 and I want to welcome you all to our How To Be Viral seminar, 73 00:03:54,143 --> 00:03:57,546 ensuring your path to becoming digital rock stars. 74 00:04:00,082 --> 00:04:01,183 Take a look around. 75 00:04:01,183 --> 00:04:04,320 These are your friends, collaborators, 76 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:05,488 but more importantly... 77 00:04:05,488 --> 00:04:09,358 resources to grow your audience. 78 00:04:10,559 --> 00:04:12,228 Imagine a friend who comments on a post... 79 00:04:12,228 --> 00:04:13,663 {\an8}Hello? 80 00:04:18,601 --> 00:04:19,902 Okay, yeah. Got it. 81 00:04:19,902 --> 00:04:22,271 Now we'll focus on recording. 82 00:04:22,271 --> 00:04:26,409 Be active on all your socials at all times 83 00:04:26,409 --> 00:04:28,411 or fall to the ultimate defeat. 84 00:04:32,014 --> 00:04:35,284 Luckily we have plans at three different price points. 85 00:04:35,284 --> 00:04:38,554 We can also help sell merchandise to your fans. 86 00:04:38,554 --> 00:04:41,257 T-shirts, hoodies, mugs, even baby pictures. 87 00:04:41,257 --> 00:04:42,591 Women: Aww. 88 00:04:42,591 --> 00:04:44,894 Create an organic transactional relationship 89 00:04:44,894 --> 00:04:47,963 with your young fans, who have access to abundant 90 00:04:47,963 --> 00:04:49,632 financial resources. 91 00:04:49,632 --> 00:04:51,067 - Man: Smart. - Woman: I'm gonna do that. 92 00:04:51,067 --> 00:04:53,436 Let me tell you about a former seminar attendee. 93 00:04:53,436 --> 00:04:55,137 He has over a billion views. 94 00:04:55,137 --> 00:04:57,973 I'm talking about DylanGotDubz. 95 00:04:57,973 --> 00:04:59,975 Dylan created hit videos like 96 00:04:59,975 --> 00:05:02,378 "Kissing Unsuspecting Girlfriends In the Hood." 97 00:05:02,378 --> 00:05:03,913 Prank 2017. 98 00:05:03,913 --> 00:05:06,749 Or "Telling People I'm the Next Black Panther in the Hood." 99 00:05:06,749 --> 00:05:08,150 Prank 2019. 100 00:05:08,150 --> 00:05:09,985 He's got brand deals with UNICEF's Smiles for the... 101 00:05:09,985 --> 00:05:12,088 Appearances on all the Jimmy hosted Late Shows. 102 00:05:12,088 --> 00:05:14,123 When I asked him about his secret to success, 103 00:05:14,123 --> 00:05:16,392 he told me, and you're going to love this, 104 00:05:16,392 --> 00:05:20,396 "You've got to find your thing." 105 00:05:24,166 --> 00:05:25,901 Dylan's thing was following the trend tabs 106 00:05:25,901 --> 00:05:27,737 and remaking videos he found, 107 00:05:27,737 --> 00:05:29,505 but doing it in the hood. 108 00:05:29,505 --> 00:05:31,107 We are in a war for attention. 109 00:05:31,107 --> 00:05:32,908 ...praise the algorithm and it will bestow its riches... 110 00:05:32,908 --> 00:05:34,009 ...the algorithm never sleeps. 111 00:05:34,009 --> 00:05:35,511 You need to be posting every second. 112 00:05:35,511 --> 00:05:37,079 Always! ...for attention and clicks. 113 00:05:37,079 --> 00:05:39,315 Every minute... Consume! 114 00:05:39,315 --> 00:05:41,016 Every day. 115 00:05:42,418 --> 00:05:43,786 Rewatch, refresh, reupload... 116 00:05:45,454 --> 00:05:46,622 Repeat! 117 00:05:46,622 --> 00:05:49,458 Up next, cancer scares. 118 00:05:49,458 --> 00:05:51,927 A fun little way to trick a bored audience 119 00:05:51,927 --> 00:05:53,763 into coming right back. 120 00:05:57,266 --> 00:06:00,369 Blue ones. Definitely better. 121 00:06:00,369 --> 00:06:01,470 Okay. 122 00:06:01,470 --> 00:06:04,507 Hey, I've seen your videos. 123 00:06:04,507 --> 00:06:05,708 Pretty good stuff, man. 124 00:06:05,708 --> 00:06:07,276 Oh, thank you. 125 00:06:07,276 --> 00:06:08,544 Um, which ones have you seen? 126 00:06:08,544 --> 00:06:09,678 See that guy over there? 127 00:06:09,678 --> 00:06:12,381 Re-box therapy. He's a re-boxer. 128 00:06:12,381 --> 00:06:15,651 He does unboxing videos in reverse. 129 00:06:15,651 --> 00:06:18,354 That just sounds like regular boxing. 130 00:06:18,354 --> 00:06:19,955 Look at that. 131 00:06:19,955 --> 00:06:21,791 I mean, this is what I've been saying. 132 00:06:21,791 --> 00:06:23,659 The internet is the new Hollywood. 133 00:06:23,659 --> 00:06:27,396 You've got Oprah, Kevin Hart, the Colonel from KFC. 134 00:06:27,396 --> 00:06:29,331 Phew. All on TikTok. 135 00:06:29,331 --> 00:06:30,666 The Colonel isn't a real person. 136 00:06:30,666 --> 00:06:33,536 Yeah? Tell that to his 28 million subscribers. 137 00:06:33,536 --> 00:06:35,171 28 million? 138 00:06:35,171 --> 00:06:37,406 How does anyone get that much? 139 00:06:37,406 --> 00:06:38,641 You got an agent, right? 140 00:06:38,641 --> 00:06:40,976 An agent? For the internet? 141 00:06:40,976 --> 00:06:44,880 What, does DylanGotDubz have an agent, too? 142 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,383 Actually, he's got one of the best. 143 00:06:47,383 --> 00:06:48,684 You might know him. 144 00:06:48,684 --> 00:06:50,085 Akash Verna? 145 00:06:50,085 --> 00:06:53,189 No, I can't say I've ever heard of him. 146 00:06:53,189 --> 00:06:54,490 Is he Indian? He sounds Indian. 147 00:06:56,892 --> 00:06:58,761 Is he? Anyway, look. 148 00:06:58,761 --> 00:07:00,663 He's one of the best out there. 149 00:07:00,663 --> 00:07:02,498 He reps the biggest guys. 150 00:07:02,498 --> 00:07:05,201 Trick Shot Twins. Pissy Elliot. 151 00:07:05,201 --> 00:07:06,769 Max Pax Big Ax? 152 00:07:06,769 --> 00:07:08,938 Mukbang McHale? 153 00:07:08,938 --> 00:07:10,873 I could set up an interview with him. 154 00:07:10,873 --> 00:07:13,209 He owes me a favour. 155 00:07:13,209 --> 00:07:15,177 Are you gonna get that? 156 00:07:15,177 --> 00:07:17,213 Nah, I'm cool. 157 00:07:18,914 --> 00:07:21,517 Actually, you know what? Can you just give me one second? 158 00:07:21,517 --> 00:07:25,354 I'm so sorry. Sorry. 159 00:07:25,354 --> 00:07:26,355 - Hello? - Supinder: Jasmeet! 160 00:07:26,355 --> 00:07:27,356 Is everything okay? 161 00:07:27,356 --> 00:07:28,591 {\an8}Big mistake... 162 00:07:32,027 --> 00:07:33,796 {\an8}Mom, how's this an emergency? 163 00:07:37,933 --> 00:07:39,468 Supinder: I don't want you to waste money. 164 00:07:39,468 --> 00:07:41,036 It's gonna be, like, a four-cent difference. 165 00:07:41,036 --> 00:07:43,639 Can you stop blowing up my phone? Oh, my God. 166 00:07:43,639 --> 00:07:44,907 {\an8}Four cent is nothing?! 167 00:07:46,642 --> 00:07:49,945 Hello? Hello. Hello! 168 00:07:49,945 --> 00:07:51,580 Sorry about that, man. I'm just dealing with-- 169 00:07:51,580 --> 00:07:54,250 No worries. We've all got wives. 170 00:07:54,250 --> 00:07:55,317 It was actually my mom. 171 00:07:55,317 --> 00:07:57,386 Okay, it's locked in. 172 00:07:57,386 --> 00:08:00,222 You got a meeting tomorrow morning with Akash at 10:30. 173 00:08:00,222 --> 00:08:01,323 - You good? - Uh... 174 00:08:01,323 --> 00:08:03,125 Great. Don't be late. 175 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:07,229 Announcer: We all know the earth is actually flat, right? 176 00:08:07,229 --> 00:08:09,098 But what if I told you... 177 00:08:12,268 --> 00:08:15,604 Dude, I swear you're at my house more than you are your own. 178 00:08:15,604 --> 00:08:18,574 Well, yeah, have you tried your mom's food? 179 00:08:18,574 --> 00:08:20,276 Yeah. I've had my mom's food. 180 00:08:20,276 --> 00:08:22,111 Oh, dude. How was the seminar? 181 00:08:22,111 --> 00:08:23,512 I don't know, man. 182 00:08:23,512 --> 00:08:25,848 It was just like, "Hey, take this shitty popular video 183 00:08:25,848 --> 00:08:28,450 and then remake it and put your shitty little spin on it. 184 00:08:28,450 --> 00:08:30,686 - Does that work? - I have no idea. 185 00:08:30,686 --> 00:08:32,288 It's just, like, why even have an audience 186 00:08:32,288 --> 00:08:33,789 if you're not really saying anything? 187 00:08:34,990 --> 00:08:36,191 Money? 188 00:08:36,191 --> 00:08:38,093 Yeah. 189 00:08:38,093 --> 00:08:40,529 Oh, I did land this meeting with some big-time agent 190 00:08:40,529 --> 00:08:42,765 named Akash Verna. 191 00:08:42,765 --> 00:08:44,033 You said "Akash Verna?" 192 00:08:44,033 --> 00:08:46,468 - Yeah. - Akash Verna. The agent. 193 00:08:46,468 --> 00:08:48,370 - Yeah. - Bro! 194 00:08:49,638 --> 00:08:51,373 Way to bury the lead. Congrats. 195 00:08:51,373 --> 00:08:52,708 That's huge. 196 00:08:52,708 --> 00:08:54,209 Yeah, but I don't think he knows who I am. 197 00:08:54,209 --> 00:08:56,145 I don't know who he is, either. 198 00:08:56,145 --> 00:08:57,546 I'm just gassing you up, man. 199 00:08:57,546 --> 00:08:59,615 Why you keep saying his name like you know him? 200 00:08:59,615 --> 00:09:01,183 It's just exciting! He's an agent! 201 00:09:01,183 --> 00:09:02,651 And I think he's a Brown guy. 202 00:09:02,651 --> 00:09:04,553 - Oh, he's a bragent. - Yeah, he's a bragent. 203 00:09:04,553 --> 00:09:06,021 I love that. Brown on Brown, bro. 204 00:09:06,021 --> 00:09:07,656 Yeah, I think he might hook it up. 205 00:09:07,656 --> 00:09:09,491 Brown on Brown crime. Let's get it. 206 00:09:09,491 --> 00:09:11,193 No, there's no crime. We're just... 207 00:09:11,193 --> 00:09:12,795 I just mean, like... 208 00:09:12,795 --> 00:09:14,863 I'm just trying to get signed. I'm not trying to commit crimes. 209 00:09:14,863 --> 00:09:16,532 I'm not saying literally, I'm just saying, like-- 210 00:09:16,532 --> 00:09:19,501 Supinder: Neal, you want some more? 211 00:09:19,501 --> 00:09:21,503 Of course I do, Pooji. 212 00:09:21,503 --> 00:09:24,039 Good. Eat as much as you like 213 00:09:24,039 --> 00:09:26,375 and think like this house is also your house. 214 00:09:26,375 --> 00:09:27,676 Okay, Pooji. 215 00:09:27,676 --> 00:09:30,145 And all this food is like your own mom's food, 216 00:09:30,145 --> 00:09:31,213 but like real food. 217 00:09:31,213 --> 00:09:32,381 Not the white food. 218 00:09:32,381 --> 00:09:33,916 O-okay, Pooji. 219 00:09:33,916 --> 00:09:35,584 Think like, I'm like your mom. 220 00:09:35,584 --> 00:09:36,585 Yes, Pooji. 221 00:09:36,585 --> 00:09:38,020 Think I am your mom. 222 00:09:38,020 --> 00:09:39,021 Okay, Pooji. 223 00:09:39,021 --> 00:09:40,356 I am your mom. 224 00:09:40,356 --> 00:09:42,891 Okay, Pooj-- Okay, Mom. 225 00:09:42,891 --> 00:09:44,827 Good. Think like that. 226 00:09:44,827 --> 00:09:46,061 Good boy. 227 00:09:46,061 --> 00:09:47,096 Mm. 228 00:09:48,097 --> 00:09:49,698 {\an8}Oy! 229 00:09:49,698 --> 00:09:51,667 {\an8}Oh, shit. I forgot. 230 00:09:55,371 --> 00:09:57,406 I know, I'm sorry. I've just been busy all day. 231 00:10:01,710 --> 00:10:03,245 I'm running around doing so many things. 232 00:10:03,245 --> 00:10:04,947 I got important meetings lined up tomorrow. 233 00:10:04,947 --> 00:10:06,015 {\an8}Uh-huh. 234 00:10:10,052 --> 00:10:11,053 Never mind. 235 00:10:13,756 --> 00:10:14,757 {\an8}Anyways. 236 00:10:17,593 --> 00:10:19,061 Don't forget, okay? 237 00:10:20,963 --> 00:10:23,098 - Okay?! - Okay, I heard you. 238 00:10:27,770 --> 00:10:31,707 Hey, uh, kind of being a dick to your mom. 239 00:10:31,707 --> 00:10:33,742 How am I being the dick? 240 00:10:33,742 --> 00:10:36,145 She's treating me like a slave and not an actual human being. 241 00:10:36,145 --> 00:10:37,746 She's stressed, dude. 242 00:10:37,746 --> 00:10:39,548 Brown people don't know how to express their emotions 243 00:10:39,548 --> 00:10:40,716 in a healthy way. 244 00:10:40,716 --> 00:10:42,084 It's this generational curse passed down 245 00:10:42,084 --> 00:10:43,886 by Imperialist regimes. 246 00:10:43,886 --> 00:10:45,421 Okay, hold the lecture. 247 00:10:45,421 --> 00:10:47,489 You only have one generationally cursed parent all right? 248 00:10:47,489 --> 00:10:49,992 And he's so much more chill compared to his sister. 249 00:10:49,992 --> 00:10:51,627 I'm not trying to lecture you, dude. 250 00:10:51,627 --> 00:10:53,896 I'm just saying, like, she's your mom. 251 00:10:53,896 --> 00:10:54,997 All right, man, whatever. 252 00:10:54,997 --> 00:10:56,598 Like, I don't wanna hear it right now. 253 00:10:56,598 --> 00:10:59,234 Just, I got a big day tomorrow, so I'm just going to crash. 254 00:11:01,970 --> 00:11:02,938 - Now? - Yeah, now. 255 00:11:02,938 --> 00:11:04,306 - Okay. - Yeah. 256 00:11:05,574 --> 00:11:07,142 Word. Cool, dude. 257 00:11:08,977 --> 00:11:10,479 Good luck tomorrow. 258 00:11:10,479 --> 00:11:13,248 Your big day. Bye! 259 00:11:13,248 --> 00:11:15,484 - Yeah. - Love you, man. 260 00:11:15,484 --> 00:11:16,752 Love you, too. 261 00:11:16,752 --> 00:11:18,454 Neal: Mom, can I have some to go? 262 00:11:18,454 --> 00:11:19,855 Supinder: Yes. Why not? 263 00:11:19,855 --> 00:11:20,989 Neal: Thank you, Pooji. 264 00:11:25,294 --> 00:11:27,096 Hey, what's going on, guys? 265 00:11:27,096 --> 00:11:29,698 {\an8}Today I'm about to do something that I never thought I could do 266 00:11:29,698 --> 00:11:32,201 {\an8}in a million years, and that is 267 00:11:32,201 --> 00:11:33,969 {\an8}to buy my dad a brand new 268 00:11:33,969 --> 00:11:35,504 {\an8}sports car! 269 00:11:36,638 --> 00:11:39,041 Woo! Let's get it! 270 00:11:50,119 --> 00:11:52,154 {\an8}Dad? 271 00:11:52,154 --> 00:11:54,456 {\an8}Yo, Dad, come on out! Big surprise! 272 00:11:58,694 --> 00:12:00,295 Whose car is this? 273 00:12:00,295 --> 00:12:01,897 Oh, you mean this brand new Porsche? 274 00:12:01,897 --> 00:12:03,365 {\an8}Yeah, I just bought it. 275 00:12:04,967 --> 00:12:06,668 He says he just bought it. 276 00:12:06,668 --> 00:12:08,637 Bought what? The car? 277 00:12:13,542 --> 00:12:15,310 Jasmeet: Dad, look! Surprise! 278 00:12:17,646 --> 00:12:19,982 {\an8}It's yours. I... I bought it for you. 279 00:12:38,934 --> 00:12:40,536 {\an8}How is this a musibata? It's a gift. 280 00:12:41,603 --> 00:12:43,705 People will take we are greedy show-offs. 281 00:12:49,278 --> 00:12:51,914 I don't see how any of those things are related in any way. 282 00:12:51,914 --> 00:12:55,083 They will think that he doesn't care about your uncle! 283 00:12:56,185 --> 00:12:58,353 Maanvi: What the fuck are you wearing? 284 00:12:58,353 --> 00:13:00,222 {\an8}Cow print? That is literally disgusting. 285 00:13:00,222 --> 00:13:02,024 {\an8}I've never seen you wear that before. 286 00:13:02,024 --> 00:13:03,759 {\an8}What is wrong with you? 287 00:13:03,759 --> 00:13:05,961 Yeah, why didn't you get something dad actually likes? 288 00:13:05,961 --> 00:13:08,063 Like a black Mercedes? 289 00:13:08,063 --> 00:13:11,066 Hold on. Where is the Camry? 290 00:13:11,066 --> 00:13:12,968 Jasmeet: Um... 291 00:13:12,968 --> 00:13:14,736 I sold it. 292 00:13:14,736 --> 00:13:17,639 No, my baby! 293 00:13:24,213 --> 00:13:25,314 Oh, shit. 294 00:13:29,051 --> 00:13:30,886 Oy, where are you going? 295 00:13:30,886 --> 00:13:31,987 I have a meeting. 296 00:13:34,790 --> 00:13:37,593 I'll take her after. I can't be late. 297 00:13:37,593 --> 00:13:38,660 {\an8}10:30. 298 00:14:04,186 --> 00:14:05,821 I need to get out of this car. 299 00:14:05,821 --> 00:14:08,190 No, Mom, you take forever. Plus, I'm going to be late. 300 00:14:13,195 --> 00:14:14,796 Okay, just hurry up. Please. 301 00:14:14,796 --> 00:14:15,831 Okay. 302 00:14:17,633 --> 00:14:20,302 ...always gets stuck. 303 00:14:20,302 --> 00:14:21,870 Oh, my God. 304 00:14:21,870 --> 00:14:23,672 Go, go. Please, go. 305 00:14:23,672 --> 00:14:25,040 - Be quick! - Okay. 306 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:26,475 Faster, please? Hurry! 307 00:14:26,475 --> 00:14:28,477 Oh, my God. Unreal. 308 00:14:37,853 --> 00:14:39,655 Oh, my God, man. 309 00:14:44,626 --> 00:14:46,528 Where is she? 310 00:14:50,866 --> 00:14:52,634 Pick up. 311 00:14:52,634 --> 00:14:54,903 Supinder: Hello. How are you? 312 00:14:54,903 --> 00:14:56,872 - I'm not ava-- - Oh, my God. 313 00:15:00,208 --> 00:15:01,677 Oh, thank God. 314 00:15:01,677 --> 00:15:02,711 Finally. 315 00:15:08,150 --> 00:15:10,052 Oh, you gotta be kidding me. 316 00:15:12,387 --> 00:15:14,156 Mom. Mom! 317 00:15:14,156 --> 00:15:15,991 Mom, let's go. I'm going to be late! 318 00:15:17,726 --> 00:15:19,061 Let's go! 319 00:15:19,061 --> 00:15:20,562 Hi, Jasmeet! 320 00:15:20,562 --> 00:15:22,230 Great. Now she's waving. 321 00:15:31,940 --> 00:15:35,077 Oh, my God. 322 00:15:35,077 --> 00:15:37,245 Are you serious? Yeah. Okay, yeah. 323 00:15:37,245 --> 00:15:38,714 Put your bag down. Get comfortable. 324 00:15:38,714 --> 00:15:41,083 All right, you know what? Fuck this. 325 00:16:16,718 --> 00:16:18,453 Hey, sorry. 326 00:16:18,453 --> 00:16:19,454 I'm here. 327 00:16:19,454 --> 00:16:20,555 10:30. That's me. Hi. 328 00:16:20,555 --> 00:16:21,623 Unfortunately, you're late 329 00:16:21,623 --> 00:16:23,458 and we have other clients to get to. 330 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,596 Can I help you reschedule? 331 00:16:27,596 --> 00:16:30,165 Okay, look. Is there any way you can squeeze me in right now? 332 00:16:30,165 --> 00:16:32,267 I just came from a really long way and-- 333 00:16:32,267 --> 00:16:33,435 I'm sorry, but no. 334 00:16:33,435 --> 00:16:34,936 Well, I'm only, like, five minutes late. 335 00:16:34,936 --> 00:16:36,271 Yeah, five minutes. 336 00:16:36,271 --> 00:16:38,507 We actually suggest you get here 10 minutes early. 337 00:16:38,507 --> 00:16:40,275 So, you're basically 15 minutes late. 338 00:16:40,275 --> 00:16:41,810 Okay, look. It's not my fault. 339 00:16:41,810 --> 00:16:44,413 I had a crazy morning. My mom, she wanted to go get milk, 340 00:16:44,413 --> 00:16:46,081 but then get got a hundred other things-- 341 00:16:46,081 --> 00:16:47,315 There he is! 342 00:16:47,315 --> 00:16:48,617 Right on IST. 343 00:16:48,617 --> 00:16:50,652 It's Indian Standard Time. 344 00:16:50,652 --> 00:16:52,521 Balle, balle! 345 00:16:52,521 --> 00:16:53,922 Come on in. 346 00:16:53,922 --> 00:16:55,490 Don't worry, this won't take long. 347 00:16:56,691 --> 00:16:57,692 Yeah. 348 00:16:59,461 --> 00:17:01,763 Welcome, welcome. You seem out of breath. 349 00:17:01,763 --> 00:17:03,131 Do you want, uh, some water? 350 00:17:03,131 --> 00:17:05,267 Maybe some mints or some gummies? 351 00:17:05,267 --> 00:17:07,269 Uh, no. I'm good, man. Thank you. 352 00:17:07,269 --> 00:17:09,504 Yeah, you having some chai coffees? 353 00:17:09,504 --> 00:17:12,507 Huh? Some butter chickens, huh? Gulab jamun. 354 00:17:12,507 --> 00:17:14,276 Sorry. 355 00:17:14,276 --> 00:17:16,878 I'm just messing with you, man. 356 00:17:16,878 --> 00:17:18,313 I got jokes, too, right? 357 00:17:18,313 --> 00:17:21,049 Yeah, hilarious. 358 00:17:21,049 --> 00:17:23,785 So, I got a chance to check out your content. 359 00:17:23,785 --> 00:17:25,187 Really cool stuff. 360 00:17:33,361 --> 00:17:36,364 Cool enough to sign me, maybe? 361 00:17:38,633 --> 00:17:41,403 Look, man, I would love to sign you right here, right now. 362 00:17:41,403 --> 00:17:42,871 Makes me look good to bring diversity 363 00:17:42,871 --> 00:17:44,306 into this roster, right? 364 00:17:44,306 --> 00:17:45,907 But first I got to get to know you a little bit. 365 00:17:45,907 --> 00:17:47,008 Tell me about yourself. 366 00:17:47,008 --> 00:17:48,910 I wanna know why you do what you do. 367 00:17:48,910 --> 00:17:51,146 Why do you make your videos? 368 00:17:51,146 --> 00:17:53,014 Well, I... I guess I'm just like another guy 369 00:17:53,014 --> 00:17:54,683 trying to become a digital rock star. 370 00:18:01,189 --> 00:18:03,358 Honestly, man. I don't know what I'm doing. 371 00:18:05,193 --> 00:18:08,330 It's just, like, people my age, they're making so much money, 372 00:18:08,330 --> 00:18:10,599 buying a house, settling down, having kids, 373 00:18:10,599 --> 00:18:12,701 and I'm just out here, what, 374 00:18:12,701 --> 00:18:15,070 delivering tiffins for my mom's tiffin service? 375 00:18:15,070 --> 00:18:17,606 You know I dropped out of med school? 376 00:18:17,606 --> 00:18:19,207 Wow. 377 00:18:19,207 --> 00:18:22,210 Yeah, man, I just realized one day it wasn't for me, you know? 378 00:18:22,210 --> 00:18:24,279 And it took forever for my parents to accept that, 379 00:18:24,279 --> 00:18:27,349 and I don't even think they fully do accept it. 380 00:18:27,349 --> 00:18:29,084 Yeah, no. That's gotta be tough. 381 00:18:29,084 --> 00:18:30,585 Yeah, man. It's really shitty. 382 00:18:30,585 --> 00:18:33,021 Like, the constant guilt and the constant disappointment, 383 00:18:33,021 --> 00:18:34,422 and all these random people telling me 384 00:18:34,422 --> 00:18:36,024 how much my parents have sacrificed for me, 385 00:18:36,024 --> 00:18:37,292 and I'm like, "I get it." 386 00:18:37,292 --> 00:18:39,694 And so, I guess, like, these videos are just 387 00:18:39,694 --> 00:18:41,763 a place for me to vent. 388 00:18:41,763 --> 00:18:44,399 So, this is your personal therapy 389 00:18:44,399 --> 00:18:46,568 to thousands of random strangers? 390 00:18:46,568 --> 00:18:48,537 Yeah, but the therapy's not just for me, you know? 391 00:18:48,537 --> 00:18:50,305 So many people can relate to what I have to say. 392 00:18:50,305 --> 00:18:52,073 I have an audience now. 393 00:18:52,073 --> 00:18:53,542 This shit is real, 394 00:18:53,542 --> 00:18:56,211 and with your help maybe I can get a bigger audience 395 00:18:56,211 --> 00:18:57,746 and make more money, 396 00:18:57,746 --> 00:19:00,115 and then my folks can just relax and stop worrying. 397 00:19:02,617 --> 00:19:04,819 Look, I'm gonna keep it a buck with you, my guy. 398 00:19:04,819 --> 00:19:07,889 Um, all you do in your videos 399 00:19:07,889 --> 00:19:11,259 is sit around in your room alone and complain 400 00:19:11,259 --> 00:19:14,896 about capitalism and white people. 401 00:19:14,896 --> 00:19:16,731 Nobody wants to watch a grown-ass Brown dude 402 00:19:16,731 --> 00:19:17,899 sit there and whine. 403 00:19:17,899 --> 00:19:19,334 "Oh, I am interesting 404 00:19:19,334 --> 00:19:21,136 because I am self-deprecating. 405 00:19:21,136 --> 00:19:23,171 I project my lack of self-worth through 406 00:19:23,171 --> 00:19:24,573 subpar internet comedies. 407 00:19:24,573 --> 00:19:26,575 Wow, I am so original. I'm so cool." 408 00:19:26,575 --> 00:19:29,611 Oh, my God. Kill yourself. 409 00:19:31,179 --> 00:19:34,082 Okay, so, what kind of content should I make? 410 00:19:34,082 --> 00:19:36,751 A couple's vlog channel. 411 00:19:36,751 --> 00:19:38,119 A what? 412 00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:41,289 People love watching regular-ass Millennial couples 413 00:19:41,289 --> 00:19:42,591 do every day things. 414 00:19:42,591 --> 00:19:45,293 You think your girlfriend would be down? 415 00:19:45,293 --> 00:19:46,761 I don't have a girlfriend. 416 00:19:46,761 --> 00:19:49,631 What? Shocker. Listen, don't worry about it. 417 00:19:49,631 --> 00:19:51,866 We got a whole batch of influencers to choose from. 418 00:19:51,866 --> 00:19:53,368 Check this out. 419 00:19:53,368 --> 00:19:56,671 Pair you up with somebody with a decent follower account. 420 00:19:56,671 --> 00:19:59,708 I'm thinking maybe like a five to seven year relationship. 421 00:19:59,708 --> 00:20:03,011 Maybe a, uh, mixed race couple, right? 422 00:20:03,011 --> 00:20:05,847 Asian. Hispanic. 423 00:20:05,847 --> 00:20:08,016 Oh, yes. 424 00:20:09,284 --> 00:20:12,454 A beautiful white woman way out of your league. 425 00:20:12,454 --> 00:20:14,789 Huh? That's, like, every Indian dude's fantasy. 426 00:20:14,789 --> 00:20:16,324 Am I right? Am I right? I'm right. 427 00:20:16,324 --> 00:20:19,327 Not mine. I mean, I'm kind of into Brown girls. 428 00:20:19,327 --> 00:20:20,895 Yeah, no. Me, too. 429 00:20:20,895 --> 00:20:23,732 For sure, but nobody wants to see that. 430 00:20:23,732 --> 00:20:27,302 I mean, you could propose to her. 431 00:20:27,302 --> 00:20:29,337 You could plan a wedding with her. 432 00:20:29,337 --> 00:20:31,506 You could announce pregnancies, huh? 433 00:20:31,506 --> 00:20:33,541 Mixed babies rake in mad views. 434 00:20:33,541 --> 00:20:36,811 We'll provide a child of course. We're not monsters. 435 00:20:36,811 --> 00:20:38,747 And then you break up. Sad, okay? 436 00:20:38,747 --> 00:20:40,982 But guess what? More views, huh? 437 00:20:40,982 --> 00:20:42,817 So, what do you think? 438 00:20:42,817 --> 00:20:46,021 You down to make some real change? 439 00:20:50,425 --> 00:20:51,593 I don't know, man. I-- 440 00:20:51,593 --> 00:20:53,995 I just feel like this isn't for me. 441 00:20:53,995 --> 00:20:56,598 Oh, this is the only thing for you. 442 00:20:56,598 --> 00:21:01,269 Look, Indians aren't really cool just yet, Jasmeet. 443 00:21:01,269 --> 00:21:02,337 Not yet, anyway. 444 00:21:02,337 --> 00:21:04,572 Okay, well, I think I'm plenty cool, 445 00:21:04,572 --> 00:21:07,042 and I don't have this like, weird, inferiority complex 446 00:21:07,042 --> 00:21:08,677 that you think all Brown guys have. 447 00:21:08,677 --> 00:21:09,678 Plus, what's with all this, 448 00:21:09,678 --> 00:21:11,613 like, "Oh, you Indians" bullshit? 449 00:21:11,613 --> 00:21:12,714 Aren't you Indian? 450 00:21:12,714 --> 00:21:13,948 Like, what are you even? 451 00:21:13,948 --> 00:21:16,017 I'm Indian. 452 00:21:16,017 --> 00:21:18,453 So, why not be a team player and help me out instead of, 453 00:21:18,453 --> 00:21:20,522 like, appealing to your whack-ass higher ups. 454 00:21:20,522 --> 00:21:22,390 Oh, I am being a team player, here, bro. 455 00:21:22,390 --> 00:21:23,792 I'm trying to give you an opportunity 456 00:21:23,792 --> 00:21:25,593 to not just be the Brown guy. 457 00:21:25,593 --> 00:21:27,762 Yeah, but what's wrong with being the Brown guy? 458 00:21:29,597 --> 00:21:31,232 All right, you know what? 459 00:21:31,232 --> 00:21:33,535 Thanks for taking this meeting, but you clearly don't get it. 460 00:21:33,535 --> 00:21:36,638 So, I'm just going to do this on my own. 461 00:21:36,638 --> 00:21:39,574 Okay. Best of luck with that. 462 00:21:39,574 --> 00:21:41,042 Shall we? 463 00:21:44,112 --> 00:21:46,247 Oh, listen, I, uh... I almost forgot. 464 00:21:46,247 --> 00:21:49,084 My cousin is, like, a huge fan. 465 00:21:49,084 --> 00:21:50,452 My whole family loves you, actually. 466 00:21:50,452 --> 00:21:52,754 Do you mind giving him, like, a bit of a shout out? 467 00:21:52,754 --> 00:21:54,789 Huh? Can we just do that? 468 00:21:54,789 --> 00:21:56,124 All right, whenever-- whenever you're ready. 469 00:21:56,124 --> 00:21:58,293 Ah. Yeah, go ahead. 470 00:21:58,293 --> 00:21:59,294 Go ahead. 471 00:22:01,930 --> 00:22:04,299 I will call you, sure, sure. Whenever. 472 00:22:20,849 --> 00:22:22,083 {\an8}Oh, my God... 473 00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:33,161 No. 474 00:22:34,662 --> 00:22:36,798 You don't need to be wasting money driving into the city. 475 00:22:38,166 --> 00:22:39,467 {\an8}Okay? 476 00:22:39,467 --> 00:22:40,935 Yup. 477 00:22:40,935 --> 00:22:41,970 {\an8}Okay... 478 00:22:43,138 --> 00:22:44,706 Let's go. 479 00:23:16,905 --> 00:23:18,039 God, you're foul. 480 00:23:34,189 --> 00:23:36,658 Wow, that's beautiful. 481 00:23:36,658 --> 00:23:38,326 Where did you hear that from? 482 00:23:39,494 --> 00:23:41,563 I used to be a writer, too. 483 00:23:43,531 --> 00:23:45,767 There are a lot of things you don't know about me. 484 00:23:47,769 --> 00:23:48,770 Wow. 485 00:24:03,718 --> 00:24:04,886 Thanks, Mom. 486 00:24:04,886 --> 00:24:05,920 {\an8}Good. 487 00:24:15,230 --> 00:24:16,231 {\an8}Jasmeet: What? 488 00:24:23,371 --> 00:24:26,641 Mom! Oh, my God! 34772

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.