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[Japanese Breakfast's"Be Sweet"]
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♪ ♪
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♪ Tell the men I'm coming ♪
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♪ Tell them count the days ♪
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♪ I can feelthe night passing by ♪
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[phone rings]
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♪ ♪
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Is that your phone?
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- Um, no it's an Amber Alert.It's nothing.
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Oh.
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[groans]
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[yawns]
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- Morning.- Hello.
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- I did not expectlast night to happen.
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Me neither.
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But, like, you wanted itto happen, right?
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I had your consent?
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- Yes, you had my consent.- Okay.
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- That wasn'tyour first time, was it?
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- Me? God, no.No, I've sexed a lot.
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Was it yours?
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- I hoped you could tellit wasn't.
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Totally, totally.
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- Hey, if it's cool,I think we shouldn't
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tell Leighton about this.
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Oh, definitely not.
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One time Bela made a commenton your hot bod
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and Leighton got so mad,she snapped a pen in half.
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- Well, then, it's settled.We won't mention last night.
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- Or this morning.- This morning? I don't...
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Oh, yes. Yes.I'm a yes for this morning.
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- Giddy up.- [moans]
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I don't know why I said that.
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- ♪ You know the vibesyou know the vibes ♪
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♪ Switch up the rideswitch up the ride ♪
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♪ Don't take the pricedon't take ♪
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- Okay, tell usevery single detail.
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Leave out nothing.
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- I'm not gonna kiss and tell.That's tacky.
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- You're right.Act it out with your food.
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He's the sausage,you're the tater tots.
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All I'll share is this,
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it is crazy how much bettersex is with Nico,
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a guy I just met, thanwith a guy I loved like Max.
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That's not crazy.
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One's hot and one broughta light saber when he visited.
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- So you're really notgonna tell us anything?
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- His sex is amazing andI can't stop thinking about it.
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- Boom.- [squeals]
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That's my girl.
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Now, describe his penis so
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I can draw it outlike a sketch artist.
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- You really like him,don't you?
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- Yeah, I mean, he's niceand funny and smart.
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And, I don't know,he, like, surprises me.
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Who surprises you?
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- No, it's just thiscute meteorologist
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on my local news channelback home.
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- Your meteorologistsurprises you?
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- Yeah, like,with his tie choices.
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- Morning, besties.I need a favor.
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So you know how I didn't getinto any of the acapella groups
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because they're allsuper jealous of me.
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Well, hold on to your labesbecause I started my own group.
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And we're having a concert...
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♪ Tomorrow ♪
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- Travis, I will never goto an acapella show.
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- Well, you'll be at this onebecause you wouldn't want
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your intersectionalityto be called into question.
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Would you?Okay, I'll see you there.
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♪ ♪
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[knock on door]
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- Hi, you have someold workout jackets, right?
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The women's centeris volunteering at
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a horse rehab farm andI'm not about to have one
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of them nibble onmy Gucci quarter zips.
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- Oh, so you want togive them one of mine?
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Sure. Take the red one.It's in the closet.
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Thank you.
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What is this?
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- Hey, babe--- Oh!
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That's like a team nickname.
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They just callme babe sometimes.
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- "You looked hot out theretoday. Love, Dalton."
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Isn't Daltonone of your coaches?
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- Leighton, I swear to God,you cannot tell anyone.
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Okay, but I may havehad an affair
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with my marriedassistant coach.
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- Okay.- Look, it was a mistake
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and it's in the past.Okay, but I need you to give me
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your solemn wordthat you're not
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- gonna say anything to anyone.- My solemn word?
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Dude, while I'm sure thisis considered some juicy stuff
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where you're from, I wentto a New York prep school.
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I've been making outwith bartenders
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since I was, like, 14.
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That's disturbing,
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but it does make me feela little bit better.
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I don't know,I've honestly been low key
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depressed about thisfor the past couple weeks.
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- Do you want to hang outand talk about it?
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I can bail on thiswomen's center thing right now.
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- Oh, no, that's nice of youbut you don't have to do that.
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Ah, it's too late.
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I already used youas an excuse.
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I told them my BIPOC roommatewas in crisis.
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- Okay.[laughter]
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- ♪ Time stops,do you feel the rhythm ♪
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♪ ♪
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- Hey, can you thinkof something
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that rhymes withAnsel Elgort's thick thighs?
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I don't think I can.
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- I'm so in my head about thisfinal Catullan submission.
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Not to be dramatic, but the sixpieces I submit tomorrow
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will determine the restof my entire comedy career.
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- Bela, your packetis so funny.
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I liked every single piece.
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Even the onesI didn't understand.
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[phone chimes]
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- Damn, you and Nicoare texting non-stop.
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- Yeah, but I have to putmy phone away and focus.
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I have a six hour shift at Sips
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and so much homeworkto catch up on.
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For the rest of the day,
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I'm tuning him outand I'm getting things done.
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I'm sure you will.
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♪ ♪
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[moaning]
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♪ ♪
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- I'm sorry I'm late.I got locked out of my room.
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[phone chimes]
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- And I forgotto lock it again.
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I'll be back in 20 minutes.
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♪ ♪
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The fuck?
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[moaning]
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♪ So baby ♪
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- I have to help a friendwith something.
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I'll be back in 14 minutes.
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♪ ♪
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[moaning]
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♪ ♪
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My dorm is having an emergency.
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I'll be back in eightin a half minutes.
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♪ ♪
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[moaning]
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Oh, shit.
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♪ ♪
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- Are you kidding me?When it comes to Chrises,
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it goes Pine, Hemsworth,Evans, and hello?
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- Oh, sorry.Do you see that guy over there?
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His name's Canaan.We kind of hooked up.
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Whitney, that guy is so hot.
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Okay, that is the kind of guythat you need to be going for.
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Not some townie doofuswho peaked in high school.
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- He works at Sipswith Kimberly.
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Kimberly works at Sips?
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I could've swornshe was a janitor.
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Okay, look,he's sitting down to eat.
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Well, what are you waiting for?Go talk to him.
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I don't know.
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I feel likeI might need to take a beat
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before jumpinginto someone new.
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- No, no, no,okay rookie mistake.
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The best way to get oversomebody is
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to whore out with someonehotter right away, like him.
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Okay.
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- Mm?- Yeah.
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[clears throat]
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- Hey.- Whitney.
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It's been a minute.Want to sit?
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Yeah. Yeah.
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- Okay, but you willhave to leave
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when my cooler friendsget here.
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[laughs]
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I can only submit six pieces,
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so I need to pickthe absolute best.
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- Uh-huh.
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- That's why I needyour honest opinion.
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- Don't go easy on me.- Uh-huh. Yup.
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- Hey, do you think weshould take a break
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so you can give my packetyour full focus?
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Are you kidding me?
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I want to do bothat the same time.
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You're so funny.It makes me so hard.
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- All right,get back down there.
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Do your thing.
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♪ Touch in the moonlight ♪
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♪ ♪
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♪ Oh, oh ♪
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- Kimberly Edie Finkel,late again.
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I'm very sorry.
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Wait, how do you knowmy middle name?
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- Payroll purposes,but don't change the subject.
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All right, you are on thin ice,young lady.
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Now grab that mop,some of the theater kids
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have been practicingspit takes.
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And you're gonna clean it up.
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Okay.
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- So, um, why do youkeep on being late? Hmm?
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- I've kind of been,like, with someone.
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[squeals]
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I knew it was becauseyou was fucking somebody.
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Uh, sorry. Can I order?
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- Excuse me,we're gabbing here.
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Is it who I think it is?
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Is his dick made out of gold?
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- Yeah, it's Nicoand it's amazing.
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But it's all I can think about.
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And yesterday,I skipped all my classes.
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And I'm barely holding onto a C in Econ.
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- Econ with Professor Bennett?- Yeah.
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- Just ask himfor extra credit.
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That's what I did last year.
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And my B plus went to an A.And I'm not just saying it
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to brag about my grades,although I'm quite bright.
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- Really?That would be so huge.
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I'll ask him about it today.
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- Does anyonehave an iPhone 4 charger?
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- I'm sorry.- No.
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♪ ♪
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- Great job gettingyour submission in
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two minutes beforethe deadline, Jeff.
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I'll be reading it last.
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Hopefully your takeon Baby Yoda
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is still freshwhen I get to it.
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- Baby Yoda.That shit is so played out.
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Totally.
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I wrote a pieceabout Baby Shark, though.
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And it's pretty biting.
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All right, everyone.
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Final submissionsare now closed.
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If anyone's late,they're out of luck.
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- Thank you allfor your hard work.
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Eric, the board, and Iare really looking forward
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to readingwhat you came up with.
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- And if we chooseany new members,
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tonight is gonna be tap night.
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We'll come find youin your rooms
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and whisk you awayfor hours of traditions
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that you cannot sharewith anyone, ever.
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Including future spouses.
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But, again, we probablywon't pick anyone.
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- We'll probably pickbetween two and four people.
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- Evangeline, could you not--[sighs]
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I will now take the submissionsand hold onto them
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until the board can reconveneto review them.
248
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But straight off the bat,I see some insane
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and embarrassing font choices.So way to go.
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Hey, um, if we get picked,
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can we finally seethe upstairs rooms?
252
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- Want me to sneak you upright now?
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Oh, shit yes. Yes.
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- Wait, you don't thinkwe'll get in trouble?
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- No one's coming backtill 8:00.
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Come on. Let's go.
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♪ ♪
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[phone chimes]
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- I feel like it'sa compliment to get catfished.
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It means he mustreally like you.
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I just don't understand
262
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,142
how you got catfishedby your cousin, again.
263
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:45,444
- He just writessuch beautiful sonnets.
264
00:10:45,511 --> 00:10:47,313
- Ginger, we've talkedabout this.
265
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:50,850
You need to set boundarieswith Randy, your cousin.
266
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:52,818
Sorry I'm late.
267
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,554
You okay, Tova?
268
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,523
- It's over betweenme and Beth.
269
00:10:57,623 --> 00:10:58,958
What? What happened?
270
00:10:59,025 --> 00:11:00,726
You two weresuch a cute couple.
271
00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:02,795
- We were supposed to go overto her house for Thanksgiving,
272
00:11:02,862 --> 00:11:04,964
and while her parents were coolwith her being a lesbian,
273
00:11:05,031 --> 00:11:07,133
she thought that I might betoo much for them.
274
00:11:07,199 --> 00:11:08,968
What? What would be too much?
275
00:11:09,035 --> 00:11:11,570
- I guess they've never metsomeone who's non-binary,
276
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:15,341
- so Beth wanted me to fem it up.- Oh, fuck that.
277
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:18,077
Hey, you might quickly want
278
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:20,079
to let us knowwhat side you're on.
279
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,248
Tova's obviously.
280
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,316
Look, when I firsthad to come here,
281
00:11:24,383 --> 00:11:25,551
I'll be real with you,
282
00:11:25,651 --> 00:11:27,386
I kind of thoughtyou all sucked.
283
00:11:27,486 --> 00:11:30,389
Not for any identity reasons,just personalities, you know?
284
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:32,591
- Mm-hmm.- But then I got to know you.
285
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,094
And Tova,I think you're pretty great.
286
00:11:35,194 --> 00:11:38,097
You are almost too coolto be here but, yet,
287
00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:40,332
you still come here.Which kind of makes you cooler.
288
00:11:40,399 --> 00:11:42,568
So this is Beth's loss.
289
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,437
Thank you, Leighton.
290
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:46,906
Uh, Leighton, quick question.
291
00:11:47,006 --> 00:11:49,842
You pointed at me when you weretalking about personalities.
292
00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:52,278
- No, no. No, I didn't.It just looked that way.
293
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:54,513
Oh, okay. Great.
294
00:11:54,580 --> 00:11:58,117
♪ ♪
295
00:11:58,217 --> 00:12:00,219
- I would be happyto offer extra credit
296
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:01,787
for helping mewith my research.
297
00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,622
It's actuallypretty exciting stuff.
298
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,725
Here, take a look.
299
00:12:07,059 --> 00:12:09,762
Oh, I love all this data.
300
00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:12,565
So many columnswith information in them.
301
00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:15,568
Yeah, this looks so cool.
302
00:12:15,634 --> 00:12:17,970
- Okay, well basically,I just need help
303
00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:20,940
with data calculations usingthe blue binder's raw data.
304
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:22,475
The formula's in the green one.
305
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,710
- The blue one, the green one.Totally get it.
306
00:12:24,777 --> 00:12:26,812
- Well, I have a meetingfor the next few hours,
307
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:29,148
but when I get back I'll tellyou how my data forecast
308
00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:31,584
changes in the oat milkindustry over the next decade.
309
00:12:31,650 --> 00:12:34,754
- If you'd like that.- Sir, I would love that.
310
00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,989
[chuckles]
311
00:12:37,089 --> 00:12:38,557
Have fun with that data.
312
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:42,895
- What the fuckam I looking at?
313
00:12:42,962 --> 00:12:44,063
[phone chimes]
314
00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:51,237
♪ ♪
315
00:12:56,609 --> 00:13:00,179
- Whoa, cool portrait.Is that, uh, Rob Schneider?
316
00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:02,648
- Are you kidding me?That's Sid Caesar.
317
00:13:02,748 --> 00:13:04,850
He basically created TV comedy.
318
00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:06,819
- Nice.I'm surprised you know that.
319
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:10,656
- Holy shit, is thata real cue card from SNL?
320
00:13:10,756 --> 00:13:12,358
Jude Law hosted that one.
321
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,026
I can name the hostand musical guest pairing
322
00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:16,295
of every episode of SNLsince the year 2000.
323
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:18,464
Okay, prove it.
324
00:13:18,531 --> 00:13:19,999
Musical guest, Korn.
325
00:13:20,099 --> 00:13:21,534
Eva Longoria hosted.
326
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:23,435
- Ludacris.- You trying to trick me?
327
00:13:23,502 --> 00:13:26,038
Ludacris? He hostedand he was the musical guest.
328
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:28,641
- Okay.Who was the musical guest
329
00:13:28,707 --> 00:13:31,710
- when the Rock hosted?- My boy Dwayne,
330
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,313
AKA Maui the demi-god,AKA the tooth fairy
331
00:13:34,380 --> 00:13:36,382
has hosted five timeswith musical guest,
332
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:39,218
George Ezra, Ray LaMontagne,Andrew WK,
333
00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:41,987
- AC/
- DC, and Katy Perry.
334
00:13:43,622 --> 00:13:45,558
I can do a good Stewie voice.
335
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,994
[as Stewie]If you want to hear it.
336
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,499
[normal voice]I think I'm gonna head out.
337
00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:55,668
Uh, thanks forbringing us up here.
338
00:13:55,734 --> 00:13:57,369
Yup.
339
00:13:58,671 --> 00:13:59,839
[laughs]
340
00:13:59,905 --> 00:14:01,640
♪ ♪
341
00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:03,375
- ♪ You only live oncebetter turn it, turn it up ♪
342
00:14:03,475 --> 00:14:05,911
♪ It's showtimethat's all we know ♪
343
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:09,248
- Yo, everyone.This is Whitney.
344
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:12,318
Baby senator. Welcome back.
345
00:14:12,384 --> 00:14:15,421
The last time she was here,she stood in the corner so long
346
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:18,023
I thought she washer mother's secret service.
347
00:14:18,090 --> 00:14:19,658
That's Jayla.
348
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:22,061
Who apparently woke up thismorning and chose violence.
349
00:14:22,161 --> 00:14:24,263
- Can your mom introduce meto Travis Scott?
350
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:26,932
- Honestly, yeah.She probably could.
351
00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:28,200
Sick.
352
00:14:28,267 --> 00:14:29,735
- Can I get you a drink?- Yes, please.
353
00:14:29,835 --> 00:14:30,936
Okay.
354
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:32,571
Let's see whatthey left for us.
355
00:14:32,671 --> 00:14:35,441
- Okay.- Oh, this is wild.
356
00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:38,878
Is this Canaan with a girlin broad daylight?
357
00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:42,381
Yeah, you should know, this guynever introduces us to girls.
358
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:43,949
He just sneaks theminto his room at night
359
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,618
like some kind of sex Batman.
360
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,120
Really? You're a sex Batman?
361
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:51,223
- No, no. That's not true.- It is though.
362
00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:54,126
What the fuck?Who's playing a slow jam?
363
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:56,528
I thought this was a turn up,not a wind down.
364
00:14:56,595 --> 00:14:58,464
Yo, Nate, what's upwith the music?
365
00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:00,633
Are you staying for dinner?
366
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:01,967
Because we're doinga nacho bar.
367
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:03,469
And I don't mean to brag,
368
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:04,970
but we go pretty hardwith the toppings station.
369
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:06,305
- Mm-hmm.- Oh, no.
370
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:07,740
I actually haveto leave in a bit
371
00:15:07,806 --> 00:15:10,242
- to go to an acapella show.- [laughs]
372
00:15:10,309 --> 00:15:11,944
Oh, wait. Are you serious?
373
00:15:12,044 --> 00:15:15,314
- Yeah, no one should everhave to go to an acapella show.
374
00:15:15,414 --> 00:15:17,449
- Unless you,like, love acapella.
375
00:15:17,549 --> 00:15:19,885
- Okay. I can tellI misrepresented
376
00:15:19,952 --> 00:15:22,421
myself this morning,and while I am
377
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:23,989
somewhat okay withbeing known as the girl with
378
00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:26,725
the senator mom,I am not okay as being known
379
00:15:26,792 --> 00:15:28,093
as the girl who likes acapella.
380
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:31,163
- I'm going against my will.- [laughs]
381
00:15:31,263 --> 00:15:32,731
♪ ♪
382
00:15:32,798 --> 00:15:35,067
- Holy shit,this autograph wall is insane.
383
00:15:35,134 --> 00:15:37,436
Oh, my God.Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
384
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:39,004
Are you kidding me?
385
00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,639
I love this place so much.
386
00:15:40,739 --> 00:15:42,007
Well, by midnight tonight
387
00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:43,175
you'll knowif you're in or not.
388
00:15:43,275 --> 00:15:44,777
- [sighs]Don't remind me.
389
00:15:44,843 --> 00:15:48,013
- Look, the deliberationscan get crazy.
390
00:15:48,113 --> 00:15:50,683
But I'll just tell you,I'm gonna vote for you.
391
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,687
- I'm not sure Ericlikes me enough.
392
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:57,156
Eric doesn't like anyone.
393
00:15:57,256 --> 00:15:58,691
I'm his roommateand best friend
394
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,859
and he regularly calls mea talentless hack.
395
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:04,129
- You are though, right?- [chuckles]
396
00:16:04,196 --> 00:16:05,631
Don't worry about Eric.
397
00:16:05,698 --> 00:16:07,666
I'll convince himyou're worth a shot.
398
00:16:09,268 --> 00:16:12,271
- Holy shit.Is that Elaine Stritch?
399
00:16:12,338 --> 00:16:13,772
She's the greatest of all time.
400
00:16:13,839 --> 00:16:15,374
When did she come here?Was it during her..
401
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:23,649
Hey, um, I don't, um...
402
00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:25,117
It's okay. Everybody's gone.
403
00:16:25,184 --> 00:16:27,386
- No, I don't wantto do whatever this is.
404
00:16:27,486 --> 00:16:29,488
Seriously?
405
00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:31,023
Yeah, I just...
406
00:16:31,123 --> 00:16:32,358
Are we cool?
407
00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:36,028
- Yeah, yeah, I guess. Yeah.- Okay.
408
00:16:36,128 --> 00:16:38,330
Great. Cool. Well, I'll see ya.
409
00:16:38,397 --> 00:16:40,833
Thanks, thanks forthe wall and stuff.
410
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,205
[moaning]
411
00:16:46,305 --> 00:16:47,806
You sure about this?
412
00:16:47,873 --> 00:16:49,141
- Yeah, he said he'dbe gone for hours.
413
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:52,311
♪ Show me love ♪
414
00:16:52,378 --> 00:16:53,512
♪ Show me love ♪
415
00:16:53,579 --> 00:16:55,814
This is hot.
416
00:16:55,881 --> 00:16:57,649
Oh, my God.
417
00:16:58,517 --> 00:16:59,685
Kimberly.
418
00:17:02,054 --> 00:17:05,190
- Sir, this is my fault andI take full responsibility.
419
00:17:05,257 --> 00:17:09,395
If you want to report anyone,report me, Chad Mickland.
420
00:17:09,495 --> 00:17:11,096
Wait, is Nico a nickname?
421
00:17:11,830 --> 00:17:12,998
[gasps] Oh.
422
00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:14,833
Professor Bennett, I realize
423
00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:16,769
this was a horrible lapsein judgement.
424
00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:19,071
But I'm having a really hardtime in your class
425
00:17:19,171 --> 00:17:20,739
and I'm so far behind.
426
00:17:20,839 --> 00:17:22,107
So if you please couldjust give me one more chance.
427
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:23,842
You've had plenty of chances.
428
00:17:23,909 --> 00:17:26,378
You've arrived late to class,you've missed assignments.
429
00:17:26,445 --> 00:17:28,947
- Now you made love on my desk.- We were only kissing.
430
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,516
He never took it out. Tell him.
431
00:17:30,582 --> 00:17:31,950
- I don't thinkthat's gonna help,
432
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,519
but it's true,it wasn't out yet.
433
00:17:33,585 --> 00:17:34,887
It does not help.
434
00:17:36,021 --> 00:17:37,389
Get out of here.
435
00:17:37,456 --> 00:17:38,791
Oh, okay. I'm going.
436
00:17:39,591 --> 00:17:41,760
I would still loveto hear your thoughts
437
00:17:41,860 --> 00:17:43,262
on oat milk futures, though.
438
00:17:43,362 --> 00:17:45,230
- Then you can listento my TED Talk.
439
00:17:45,297 --> 00:17:46,565
Got it.
440
00:17:46,632 --> 00:17:53,105
♪ ♪
441
00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:54,306
- Hey.- Hey.
442
00:17:54,406 --> 00:17:56,041
How's it goingwith you know who?
443
00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:58,143
- Actually, I kind of wantedto talk to you about that.
444
00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,978
I think I mightbe a sex addict.
445
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,315
- I promise you, you are not.- We had sex six times today.
446
00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:06,051
- Okay, that's a lot.- And it was almost seven,
447
00:18:06,118 --> 00:18:07,653
but then a professorwalked in on us.
448
00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:09,588
I'm sorry, what?
449
00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:12,224
- Everything I see makes methink of having sex with him.
450
00:18:12,291 --> 00:18:14,326
Like, have you noticedhow phallic
451
00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:16,061
the lamppostson this campus are?
452
00:18:16,128 --> 00:18:17,629
I have not.
453
00:18:17,729 --> 00:18:19,331
Okay, I'm here.
454
00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:20,833
Can we take a quick photo forproof and then we can leave?
455
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,734
- I was thinking we wouldcheer really loud
456
00:18:22,801 --> 00:18:24,670
in the first songand then just scurry out.
457
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,939
- I can do that.- Hey, guys.
458
00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:29,174
- Hey, did you turn inyour submission?
459
00:18:29,274 --> 00:18:30,642
Yeah, it's in.
460
00:18:30,742 --> 00:18:32,111
- Is everything okay?You don't seem excited.
461
00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:33,512
I don't know.
462
00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:35,013
I'm just--I'm pretty sureI'm not getting in.
463
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:36,682
- You're probably justbeing tough on yourself.
464
00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:39,251
- No, but it's fine.Maybe it's even for the best.
465
00:18:39,318 --> 00:18:44,623
- Hello, everyone.We are the AcaFellas.
466
00:18:44,690 --> 00:18:47,526
And we are ready to rock you.
467
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:51,196
Oh, though, to be clear,we only do pop covers.
468
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,165
Three, four.
469
00:18:53,265 --> 00:18:57,136
[all vocalizing]
470
00:18:57,202 --> 00:18:59,371
♪ Havana, ooh, na na ♪
471
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:03,041
♪ Half of my heartis in Havana, ooh, na na ♪
472
00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:04,943
- Whoo!- Yes!
473
00:19:05,010 --> 00:19:06,011
[all cheering]
474
00:19:06,111 --> 00:19:07,880
♪ Havana, na na na ♪
475
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,781
- Okay, he saw us.Now we can leave.
476
00:19:09,848 --> 00:19:13,118
- None of you ever let me doanything this embarrassing.
477
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:14,786
♪ Havana ♪
478
00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:17,156
♪ He didn't walk upwith the how you doin' ♪
479
00:19:17,222 --> 00:19:20,626
- Okay, Whitney is meeting upwith Canaan again tonight.
480
00:19:20,692 --> 00:19:21,960
God, I love this.
481
00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:23,462
I'm sorry.
482
00:19:23,529 --> 00:19:25,330
Are you invested inthe happiness of someone else?
483
00:19:25,397 --> 00:19:27,399
I do not know howto process this information.
484
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,234
She's kind of cool.
485
00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:30,569
And of the threeof my roommates,
486
00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:32,371
she's definitelythe most normal.
487
00:19:32,471 --> 00:19:36,074
And it turns out, I am prettygood at giving dating advice.
488
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:38,911
- You are for someonewho introduced me
489
00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:41,413
as a business acquaintanceto a cashier.
490
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,549
- Okay, look,I'm not a showy person.
491
00:19:43,649 --> 00:19:45,584
I don't need to put ona rainbow bathing suit
492
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:47,352
and run downthe street screaming,
493
00:19:47,419 --> 00:19:49,488
"I have a girlfriend."
494
00:19:49,555 --> 00:19:52,424
Oh, you have a girlfriend.
495
00:19:53,392 --> 00:19:54,493
Yeah.
496
00:19:55,594 --> 00:19:58,697
No, I mean--I don't know.
497
00:19:58,764 --> 00:20:01,600
[soft acoustic music]
498
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:02,768
Do I?
499
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:06,772
Yeah, you do.
500
00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:08,840
Come here.
501
00:20:08,907 --> 00:20:11,777
- ♪ Going so fastevery thought we had ♪
502
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:14,680
♪ Is coming undone ♪
503
00:20:14,746 --> 00:20:18,016
♪ Falling behindwith everything we left ♪
504
00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:22,854
- Oh, shit.Baby senator's back, y'all.
505
00:20:22,921 --> 00:20:24,122
- Uh-uh, we're gonna have to
506
00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:25,791
work on that nickname,loud girl.
507
00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:28,961
Loud girl? Excuse me?
508
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,929
You know, actually,I love that. I am loud.
509
00:20:31,029 --> 00:20:33,966
- You are loud.- Glad you came back.
510
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:35,567
Of course I did.
511
00:20:35,634 --> 00:20:37,736
I spent the last two hoursthinking about one thing.
512
00:20:37,803 --> 00:20:41,106
- Ditching Canaan for me?- What? No.
513
00:20:41,206 --> 00:20:42,474
Nachos.
514
00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:45,077
- Darius, no onewould pick you over Canaan.
515
00:20:45,143 --> 00:20:46,278
That's insane.
516
00:20:50,048 --> 00:20:51,083
[sighs]
517
00:20:58,790 --> 00:21:00,626
[knocking on door]
518
00:21:00,726 --> 00:21:02,728
[chanting]Bela! Bela! Bela!
519
00:21:02,794 --> 00:21:05,998
- Bela! Bela! Bela!- Bela Malhotra,
520
00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:07,432
you've been tappedby the Catullan.
521
00:21:07,499 --> 00:21:10,068
- Do you accept?- Yes. Yes, I do.
522
00:21:10,135 --> 00:21:11,837
- Congratulations.- You so deserve this.
523
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:15,140
Your packet was amazing.[cheering]
524
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,809
- I was dyingreading your stuff.
525
00:21:17,909 --> 00:21:20,512
You are an absolute genius.
526
00:21:20,612 --> 00:21:22,347
We're so proud of you.
527
00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:24,449
Yes!
528
00:21:24,516 --> 00:21:27,319
♪ ♪
529
00:21:27,419 --> 00:21:30,022
♪ Shine ♪
530
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:32,024
- Hey, let's nothave sex tonight.
531
00:21:32,758 --> 00:21:34,993
- Okay, I was gonna saythe same thing.
532
00:21:35,093 --> 00:21:36,995
- Really?- No.
533
00:21:37,095 --> 00:21:38,997
- Oh.- It's all good.
534
00:21:39,097 --> 00:21:42,868
Okay, other options.We can watch TV.
535
00:21:42,968 --> 00:21:45,037
- TV sounds good.- Okay.
536
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:46,371
I can't stay late, though.
537
00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:48,473
I have to studysince I public sexed
538
00:21:48,540 --> 00:21:50,776
- my way out of an Econ credit.- [sighs]
539
00:21:50,842 --> 00:21:53,378
If you need help withthat Econ grade, I can help.
540
00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:57,783
Theta keeps copiesof midterms and finals
541
00:21:57,849 --> 00:21:59,818
that lazy professorsrecycle year after year.
542
00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:01,853
So if you want to knowwhat's on Bennett's test,
543
00:22:01,953 --> 00:22:03,221
it's right here.
544
00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:04,823
You could borrow itif you want.
545
00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:06,958
No, no, I can't do that.
546
00:22:07,025 --> 00:22:08,860
Cheating is, sort of,the antithesis
547
00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:10,462
of everything I believe in.
548
00:22:11,463 --> 00:22:13,899
All right. Whatever you want.
549
00:22:14,700 --> 00:22:17,969
- What I want is to goback to your room, please.
550
00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:20,739
There's this new documentary on
551
00:22:20,839 --> 00:22:22,307
factory farmingI really want to watch.
552
00:22:22,374 --> 00:22:25,911
- Wow. First no sexand now a farming doc.
553
00:22:26,011 --> 00:22:28,046
This night just keeps gettinghotter and hotter.
554
00:22:31,183 --> 00:22:32,417
[groans]
555
00:22:32,517 --> 00:22:34,586
I'm one glass awayfrom getting Asian flush.
556
00:22:34,686 --> 00:22:37,389
- You haven't had any yet.- Exactly.
557
00:22:37,489 --> 00:22:39,691
- [laughs][phone rings]
558
00:22:42,694 --> 00:22:45,197
- Um, girlfriend,should I ask why
559
00:22:45,263 --> 00:22:47,432
a girl named Mayais calling you at 1:00 a.m.?
560
00:22:47,532 --> 00:22:49,868
- Oh, my God, chill.She's just a friend.
561
00:22:49,935 --> 00:22:52,170
She's actually coming to visitin town this weekend.
562
00:22:52,237 --> 00:22:53,939
To visit your vagina?
563
00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:57,209
- Maya is not a threat to you.Okay?
564
00:22:57,275 --> 00:22:59,344
She's my brother, Nico's,girlfriend.
565
00:22:59,411 --> 00:23:02,381
[funky upbeat music]
566
00:23:02,447 --> 00:23:09,554
♪ ♪
567
00:24:22,127 --> 00:24:23,261
Go to bed.
47651
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