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1
00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:14,048
[ GASPS ] MAIL!
MAIL!
2
00:00:14,115 --> 00:00:16,117
WHERE ARE YOUR SHOES?
I'LL GET 'EM LATER.
3
00:00:16,184 --> 00:00:17,551
GET 'EM NOW.
WHY?
4
00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:19,387
BECAUSE IF YOUR HARVARD
ACCEPTANCE LETTER'S IN
5
00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:20,821
AND YOU DON'T HAVE SHOES ON
6
00:00:20,888 --> 00:00:22,656
WE CAN'T RUN OFF
IMMEDIATELY AND CELEBRATE.
7
00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:24,692
ALL OF OUR HAPPINESS
WILL BE ON HOLD
8
00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,527
UNTIL YOU COME BACK
AND WEAR SHOES.
9
00:00:26,594 --> 00:00:28,362
YOU WANNA PUT A HOLD
ON HAPPINESS?
10
00:00:28,429 --> 00:00:30,798
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE
IF WE WAIT THEN OR NOW?
11
00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:33,301
WE'RE NOT HAPPY NOW.
RIGHT. OKAY.
12
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:36,870
NO LACING --
JUST GET 'EM ON YOUR FEET.
13
00:00:36,937 --> 00:00:38,506
LET'S GO!
14
00:00:42,143 --> 00:00:43,111
KIRK!
KIRK!
15
00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:44,578
GOOD MORNING, LADIES.
16
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:47,215
IS THERE AN ENVELOPE?
BIG ONE? NOT A LITTLE ONE.
17
00:00:47,281 --> 00:00:48,449
YEAH, BIG MEANS SHE'S IN.
18
00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:50,284
IF LITTLE,
SHE NEEDS TO MARRY RICH.
19
00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:52,186
JUST ONE SECOND, PLEASE.
20
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:53,887
AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO
SORT 'EM EARLIER?
21
00:00:53,954 --> 00:00:56,724
PERSONALLY, I THINK IT TAKES
THE SPONTANEITY OUT OF THE JOB.
22
00:00:56,790 --> 00:00:59,293
NEED SOME HELP?
FEDERAL LAW PROHIBITS IT.
23
00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:00,861
ANY CHANCE
YOU COULD GO FASTER?
24
00:01:00,928 --> 00:01:03,897
YOU GOT A GIRL'S FUTURE IN
THAT SACK OF YOURS...SANTA.
25
00:01:03,964 --> 00:01:05,466
THANK YOU FOR
ADDING THE "SANTA."
26
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:09,170
YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE NOTICED?
A MAIL WITH OUR NAMES ON IT?
27
00:01:09,237 --> 00:01:11,071
I'VE NOTICED, PEOPLE DON'T
SLOW DOWN ANYMORE.
28
00:01:11,139 --> 00:01:12,706
I'VE GOT TIME TO
TIE MY SHOES.
29
00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:15,143
YES, COBBLE YOURSELF
A NEW PAIR, DANIEL DAY-LEWIS.
30
00:01:15,209 --> 00:01:17,178
NO ONE STOPS
TO SMELL A NICE FLOWER
31
00:01:17,245 --> 00:01:18,746
OR LOOK AT A PUPPY.
32
00:01:18,812 --> 00:01:19,913
YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
33
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:21,749
NO ONE STOPS TO ASK
HOW YOU'RE DOING,
34
00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:24,585
IS YOUR FAMILY WELL? DID YOU
SEE THAT GAME LAST NIGHT?
35
00:01:24,652 --> 00:01:26,053
PEOPLE SUCK.
IS THAT OURS?
36
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,021
WHAT? OH...
"MRS. RITA FLORA." NOPE.
37
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,657
RATS!
IT COULD STILL BE THERE.
38
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:30,724
DIDN'T RITA FLORA DIE?
39
00:01:30,791 --> 00:01:32,493
WHILE YOU WERE DELIVERING
HER MAIL?
40
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,328
SHE DID DIE.
SHE DIED LAST WEEK.
41
00:01:34,395 --> 00:01:37,165
THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO PUT YOUR
MAIL ON HOLD WHEN YOU DIE.
42
00:01:37,231 --> 00:01:38,799
LET'S GO BACK INSIDE.
AND THE ENVELOPE?
43
00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:41,635
WE'LL CHECK BACK ON OUR WAY
TO LUKE'S...FOR DINNER!
44
00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:43,204
HEY, ONE FOR KIRK!
45
00:01:45,473 --> 00:01:49,109
* IF YOU'RE OUT
ON THE ROAD *
46
00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:54,114
* FEELIN' LONELY
AND SO COLD *
47
00:01:54,182 --> 00:01:57,851
* ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS CALL MY NAME *
48
00:01:57,918 --> 00:02:02,590
* AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN *
49
00:02:02,656 --> 00:02:07,094
* WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW *
50
00:02:07,161 --> 00:02:11,732
* ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO *
51
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:13,133
* IF YOU NEED *
52
00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:16,069
* YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU *
53
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,871
* I WILL FOLLOW *
54
00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:20,274
* OH, OH, OH *
55
00:02:20,341 --> 00:02:24,845
* WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW *
56
00:02:24,912 --> 00:02:29,750
* ANY, ANYWHERE
THAT YOU TELL ME TO *
57
00:02:29,817 --> 00:02:31,185
* IF YOU NEED *
58
00:02:31,252 --> 00:02:34,121
* YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU *
59
00:02:34,188 --> 00:02:38,292
* I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD *
60
00:02:39,727 --> 00:02:41,128
[ TAPPING ]
IT'S GETTING FRUSTRATING --
61
00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:42,363
I MEAN THERE ARE SO
MANY GREAT SONGS
62
00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:43,731
THAT HAVE BEEN WRITTEN
POST-COBAIN,
63
00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:45,399
BUT TRY AND CONVINCE ZACK.
HE'S IMPOSSIBLE!
64
00:02:45,466 --> 00:02:47,568
STUBBORN, IN CASE
YOU'VE EVER NOTICED.
65
00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,403
LANE, COULD YOU --
WITH THE STICKS THERE --
66
00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:51,839
OH, SORRY,
NERVOUS HABIT.
67
00:02:51,905 --> 00:02:53,241
MOM'S A LITTLE CRABBY.
68
00:02:53,307 --> 00:02:55,075
I'M NOT CRABBY.
I'M VERY, VERY ILL.
69
00:02:55,142 --> 00:02:56,610
ALLERGIES.
DEADLY ALLERGIES.
70
00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:58,879
SHOULD WE MAKE FUNERAL
ARRANGEMENTS NOW?
71
00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:02,149
BE SURE YOU GET YOUR MONEY BACK
IN CASE THIS STUFF WORKS.
72
00:03:02,216 --> 00:03:03,417
WHERE DID
YOU GET THOSE?
73
00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:05,719
IN YOUR ROOM.
THESE EXPIRED IN '98.
74
00:03:05,786 --> 00:03:06,954
SO I SHOULD TAKE 4?
75
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,021
THAT'S EXACTLY
MY POINT.
76
00:03:08,088 --> 00:03:10,991
HERE, NEW MENUS!
VERY FANCY!
77
00:03:11,058 --> 00:03:12,926
WHY'D NEW MENUS?
IT WAS TIME.
78
00:03:12,993 --> 00:03:14,395
BUT I HAD MADE LITTLE DOODLES
79
00:03:14,462 --> 00:03:17,097
WITH MY NAME HIDDEN IN THEM
ON EACH ONE.
80
00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:18,266
SORRY.
81
00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,301
IT TOOK ME YEARS
TO HIT EVERY MENU.
82
00:03:20,368 --> 00:03:22,035
THESE HAVE SUPER-HEAVY
PLASTIC OVER THEM.
83
00:03:22,102 --> 00:03:26,374
THE SUPER-HEAVY PLASTIC
IS THERE TO DISCOURAGE DOODLING.
84
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:28,242
THIS LOOKS DIFFERENT.
IT'S NOT DIFFERENT.
85
00:03:28,309 --> 00:03:29,743
TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
NOT THAT DIFFERENT.
86
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,845
THERE ARE MORE SALADS.
THREE MORE SALADS.
87
00:03:31,912 --> 00:03:34,515
WHO NEEDS THREE MORE SALADS?
ONE WAS ENOUGH.
88
00:03:34,582 --> 00:03:37,150
NICOLE SAID THERE WASN'T
THAT MUCH FOR HER TO EAT
89
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,919
ON THE MENU, SO I JUST --
90
00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:41,455
YOU ADDED THREE SALADS
JUST FOR NICOLE.
91
00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:43,491
WHEN I ASKED YOU TO ADD
CHILI-TOPPED PRINGLES,
92
00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,326
YOU SAID NO.
I STAND BY THAT.
93
00:03:45,393 --> 00:03:47,261
NICOLE GETS THREE SALADS,
I GET "NO"?
94
00:03:47,328 --> 00:03:48,662
BECAUSE NICOLE'S
HIS GIRLFRIEND.
95
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,331
NICOLE IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND.
96
00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:52,400
NICOLE IS THE WOMAN
I'M DATING, THAT'S IT.
97
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:55,002
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET
SERIOUS -- PLACE GOES SOY?
98
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,103
JUST ORDER, PLEASE.
99
00:03:56,169 --> 00:03:58,306
THE MONTE CRISTO
SANDWICH'S OFF?
100
00:03:58,372 --> 00:03:59,707
NO!
YOU DID.
101
00:03:59,773 --> 00:04:01,542
YOU TOOK OFF
THE MONTE CRISTO SANDWICH.
102
00:04:01,609 --> 00:04:03,043
I OMITTED
A FEW OBSOLETE DISHES.
103
00:04:03,110 --> 00:04:06,079
I CAN'T BELIEVE NICOLE MADE YOU
TAKE OFF THE MONTE CRISTO.
104
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:07,281
SHE'S GOT YOU MENU-WHIPPED.
105
00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:08,816
SHE DOES NOT HAVE ME
MENU-WHIPPED.
106
00:04:08,882 --> 00:04:10,818
I TOOK OFF A DISGUSTING,
RIDICULOUS SANDWICH
107
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:13,654
THAT NO ONE HAS EVER ORDERED,
INCLUDING THE THREE OF YOU.
108
00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:16,290
JUST HAVING IT THERE
MADE US FEEL WE ALWAYS COULD.
109
00:04:16,357 --> 00:04:17,891
IT WAS COMFORTING.
LIKE SOUP.
110
00:04:17,958 --> 00:04:21,028
EXACTLY. IT WAS COMFORTING LIKE
DEEP-FRIED HAM-AND-CHEESE SOUP.
111
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:24,298
AND EVEN THOUGH I NEVER ORDERED
IT, I TALKED ABOUT ORDERING IT.
112
00:04:24,365 --> 00:04:25,699
HAVEN'T I?
ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS.
113
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:27,501
YOU'VE NOT ONLY
ELIMINATED A SANDWICH,
114
00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:29,537
YOU'VE ELIMINATED
A CONVERSATION PIECE.
115
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,104
NOW WHAT'LL WE
TALK ABOUT?
116
00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:32,673
FINE.
117
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:37,945
HERE -- OLD MENUS --
EVERYTHING'S THERE.
118
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:39,847
KNOCK YOURSELVES OUT.
119
00:04:39,913 --> 00:04:42,550
HOW COME EVERYBODY ELSE
GETS A NEW MENU?
120
00:04:47,254 --> 00:04:49,457
I FEEL MUCH BETTER NOW.
121
00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:51,492
WELL, I MUST SAY
I'M GLAD TO SEE
122
00:04:51,559 --> 00:04:53,927
THAT SIMPLY BECAUSE
THE S.A.T.s ARE OVER,
123
00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:56,497
MOST OF YOU ARE STILL TAKING
YOUR CLASSWORK SERIOUSLY --
124
00:04:56,564 --> 00:04:57,865
MOST OF YOU.
125
00:04:57,931 --> 00:05:00,100
HMM...MICHAEL MASON --
126
00:05:00,167 --> 00:05:02,235
WORTH EVERY WRONG ANSWER.
127
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:03,604
ALRIGHT,
BEFORE WE CONTINUE,
128
00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:05,038
I WOULD LIKE TO REMIND YOU
129
00:05:05,105 --> 00:05:07,240
THAT THE CHILTON
BICENTENNIAL CELEBRATION
130
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,309
TAKES PLACE NEXT WEEK.
131
00:05:09,377 --> 00:05:11,645
NUMBER 4.
WELL DONE.
132
00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:13,481
THE SIGN-UP SHEET
FOR THE SPEECH CONTEST
133
00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:15,716
HAS GONE UP
IN THE BACK OF THE ROOM.
134
00:05:15,783 --> 00:05:18,151
THE CONTEST'S ON FRIDAY
AND THE WINNER WILL PRESENT
135
00:05:18,218 --> 00:05:19,453
THEIR SPEECH AT THE CEREMONY.
136
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,689
SOME OF YOU MAY BE SAYING
TO YOURSELF,
137
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,323
"I ALREADY TURNED IN
MY COLLEGE APPLICATION.
138
00:05:23,391 --> 00:05:25,759
"WHY SHOULD I SPEND TIME
ENTERING A SPEECH COMPETITION
139
00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:29,029
"WHICH, IF I WIN, MEANS I HAVE
TO GIVE UP A FRIDAY NIGHT
140
00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:32,299
"I CAN'T USE IT FOR MY RESUME.
WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?"
141
00:05:32,366 --> 00:05:33,634
WOW. THAT WAS SPOOKY.
142
00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,869
YES, THE SPEECH WILL NOT GO
ON YOUR RECORD,
143
00:05:35,936 --> 00:05:38,706
HOWEVER, THE BICENTENNIAL WILL
BE QUITE A PRESTIGIOUS AFFAIR.
144
00:05:38,772 --> 00:05:40,708
PAST ALUMNI AND FACULTY
WILL BE THERE.
145
00:05:40,774 --> 00:05:42,543
SOME OF THESE PEOPLE
ARE NOW PROFESSORS
146
00:05:42,610 --> 00:05:44,645
AT THE SAME SCHOOLS YOU'RE
PLANNING ON ATTENDING,
147
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:46,680
PLUS C-SPAN WILL BE
BROADCASTING THE EVENT LIVE.
148
00:05:46,747 --> 00:05:50,117
IT'S SHAPING TO BE
A VERY EXCITING EVENT.
149
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:51,351
[BELL RINGS]
THINK ABOUT IT.
150
00:05:51,419 --> 00:05:52,386
OH! I ALMOST FORGOT
151
00:05:52,453 --> 00:05:53,821
TO WELCOME BACK BRAD LANGFORD.
152
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:55,656
HE RETURNS TO US
FRESH FROM BROADWAY
153
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,725
WHERE HE'S JUST COMPLETED
A SUCCESSFUL RUN
154
00:05:57,791 --> 00:06:00,394
OF "INTO THE WOODS."
WELCOME BACK, BRAD.
155
00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:02,295
THANK YOU.
IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK.
156
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,797
SIT DOWN, MARY MARTIN.
157
00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:06,233
ALRIGHT, EVERYONE, HAVE
A LOVELY REST OF THE DAY.
158
00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:08,502
I WILL SEE YOU TOMORROW.
159
00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:11,004
RORY, HI.
160
00:06:11,071 --> 00:06:13,707
HEY, BRAD.
HOW WAS BROADWAY?
IT WAS GREAT.
161
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,809
BUT NATHAN LANE
IS A VERY BITTER MAN.
162
00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:18,679
EVEN MORE THAN THE ACTUAL
EXPERIENCE OF PERFORMING LIVE,
163
00:06:18,746 --> 00:06:21,549
THE CONFIDENCE IT GIVES YOU IN
EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE --
164
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,250
THAT'S THE MOST AMAZING THING.
165
00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,985
YOU DO LOOK RATHER CONFIDENT.
166
00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:26,086
IT'S THE NEW ME.
167
00:06:26,153 --> 00:06:27,721
SO, BRAD, BROADWAY.
168
00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:30,624
I MUST KNOW -- DID YOU
GET TO KEEP YOUR MAKEUP?
169
00:06:30,691 --> 00:06:32,660
WHAT ABOUT YOUR COSTUMES?
'CAUSE THAT SEEMS GREAT.
170
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,495
UNLESS YOU'RE DOING
"LES MIS."
OR "CATS."
171
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:36,530
OR SPANDEX WITH THE TAIL
AND JAZZ SHOES.
172
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:37,665
SO, DO YOU?
173
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,500
DO I --
GET TO KEEP THE MAKEUP?
174
00:06:39,567 --> 00:06:41,134
I DIDN'T ASK.
YOU DIDN'T ASK?
175
00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:42,570
HOW DO YOU LEAVE THE HOUSE
176
00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:44,605
AND NOT HAVE A PIANO
FALL ON YOU?
177
00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:46,239
WELL, I MAKE A LEFT
ON FEDERAL --
178
00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:49,209
BRAD, THAT REALLY
DIDN'T REQUIRE AN ANSWER.
179
00:06:49,276 --> 00:06:50,343
YOU'RE BLOCKING
THE LIST.
180
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:51,712
WILL WE PLEASE MOVE
181
00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:54,147
SO YOU MAY SIGN UP
FOR THE SPEECH CONTEST?
182
00:06:54,214 --> 00:06:55,583
WHY, YES, WE'D BE HAPPY TO.
183
00:06:55,649 --> 00:06:57,618
HOW KIND OF YOU
TO PHRASE IT RESPECTFULLY.
184
00:06:57,685 --> 00:07:00,253
YOU MOVING OR
DO YOU NEED A "5, 6, 7, 8"?
185
00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:03,624
PARIS, THIS TIME ONSTAGE HAS
BEEN A VERY GROWING EXPERIENCE.
186
00:07:03,691 --> 00:07:05,726
I'M NO LONGER
INTIMIDATED BY YOU.
187
00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:09,229
I'M THRILLED TO HEAR IT,
CHITA RIVERA. MOVE.
188
00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:11,264
GILMORE, I CERTAINLY HOPE
YOU'RE SIGNING UP, TOO.
189
00:07:11,331 --> 00:07:13,901
YOU'RE MY LAST CHANCE
TO TROUNCE YOU AT THIS SCHOOL.
190
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:16,470
MY DECISION TO DO THIS
DOESN'T DEPEND ON YOU.
191
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,772
IT WON'T BE A TOTALLY
SATISFYING VICTORY
192
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,642
JUST BEATING JEROME ROBBINS AND
THE REST OF THE LOSERS HERE.
193
00:07:21,709 --> 00:07:24,745
I'D REALLY LIKE TO
TAKE YOU DOWN, ALSO.
194
00:07:24,812 --> 00:07:27,014
BOY, SHE IS REALLY UP
ON HER THEATER REFERENCES.
195
00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:30,618
THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!
I AM BEYOND OFFENDED.
196
00:07:30,684 --> 00:07:32,620
DID YOU TELL THEM
I'M BEYOND OFFENDED?
197
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:34,187
SENDING MY FOOD BACK?!
198
00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:36,824
THAT'S IT -- GET THEIR NAMES.
THEY'RE NEVER EATING HERE AGAIN.
199
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,659
OKAY.
WAIT -- WHAT
WINE WAS HE DRINKING?
200
00:07:38,726 --> 00:07:40,561
1952 CHATEAU
PETRUS BORDEAUX.
201
00:07:40,628 --> 00:07:42,596
HMPH!
OKAY, NEVER MIND.
202
00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:44,031
HEY, IS EVERYTHING OKAY?
203
00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:46,834
NO, WE HAVE GOT TO HAVE
A BETTER SCREENING SYSTEM
204
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:48,736
FOR CUSTOMERS HERE.
YES, WE DO.
205
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:51,304
WE CURRENTLY HAVE NO SCREENING
SYSTEM FOR CUSTOMERS.
206
00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:52,740
THEY SENT IT BACK --
MY FOOD,
207
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:55,208
MY 4-STAR "YOU HAVEN'T LIVED
TILL YOU'VE EATEN THERE,
208
00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:56,710
SAYS RUTH REICHL" FOOD.
209
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:58,612
WHAT WAS WRONG?
YOU NAME IT --
210
00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:00,781
TOO SALTY,
TOO HOT, TOO SEWER-Y.
211
00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:03,016
HONEY, CALM DOWN.
SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST STUPID.
212
00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:06,720
YES, THEY ARE STUPID, AND STUPID
PEOPLE HAVE STUPID FRIENDS,
213
00:08:06,787 --> 00:08:09,590
AND THEY ALL HAVE TO COME HERE
AND BE STUPID TOGETHER.
214
00:08:09,657 --> 00:08:11,859
DON'T BE MAD AT ME,
BUT I MUST ASK.
215
00:08:11,925 --> 00:08:13,293
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG
WITH THE FOOD?
216
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,328
OF COURSE THERE'S NOTHING
WRONG WITH THE FOOD!
217
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:17,965
WOULDN'T I KNOW IF SOMETHING
WAS WRONG WITH MY FOOD?
218
00:08:18,031 --> 00:08:20,333
YOU DON'T THINK THAT
I TASTED EVERY LAST DISH
219
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:23,537
THAT WAS SENT BACK.
I TASTED IT. MANUEL TASTED IT.
220
00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:25,673
RICO TASTED IT.
LOUELLA TASTED IT.
221
00:08:25,739 --> 00:08:28,676
WE ALL TASTED IT
AND IT TASTES FINE!
222
00:08:29,409 --> 00:08:30,611
OKAY, DO YOU MIND?
223
00:08:30,678 --> 00:08:31,779
YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME?
224
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:33,313
I BELIEVE YOU COMPLETELY,
225
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:36,584
BUT IT'S EASIER FOR ME TO TAKE
ON THOSE WHO DOUBT YOU
226
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,218
IF I'VE ACTUALLY
TASTED IT MYSELF.
227
00:08:38,285 --> 00:08:39,887
FINE, GO AHEAD.
228
00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,557
OKAY, NOW I GET
THE "SEWER-Y" REFERENCE.
229
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,025
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT?
230
00:08:45,092 --> 00:08:46,126
COME HERE.
231
00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:47,961
JUST SEND THEM OUT
SOME FREE DESSERTS.
232
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,698
FREE DESSERTS? YOU'RE GIVING
THE STUPID PEOPLE FREE DESSERTS!
233
00:08:50,764 --> 00:08:52,199
SOOKIE, I LOVE YOU.
234
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:53,500
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
235
00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:55,836
I LOVE YOUR FOOD,
YOU KNOW THAT.
YEAH.
236
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,906
BUT I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT
THAT BITE I JUST HAD
237
00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:01,141
IS ONE OF THE WORST
THINGS I'VE EVER TASTED,
238
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,976
AND I'VE TASTED SOME
VERY BAD THINGS.
239
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:05,212
ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN'T JUST
ACCIDENTALLY DROP SOMETHING
240
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:07,247
IN THE FOOD, LIKE
STRYCHNINE OR MANURE?
241
00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:09,883
NO! I TESTED EACH DISH EVERY
STEP OF THE WAY --
242
00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:12,720
THE BASE, THE STOCK,
THE SAUCE, THE SEASONINGS.
243
00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:14,822
ARE YOU SICK?
THE FLU OR A COLD?
244
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,657
ALLERGIES CAN THROW
YOUR TASTE BUDS OFF.
245
00:09:16,724 --> 00:09:17,958
NO, I'M NOT SICK.
246
00:09:18,025 --> 00:09:20,127
A LITTLE LAST WEEK,
BUT NOTHING TODAY.
247
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:21,962
YOU SHOULD THINK
ABOUT GETTING A CHECKUP.
248
00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:23,864
MAYBE IT WAS MORE
THAN LITTLE.
249
00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:25,398
THE FOOD WAS REALLY BAD?
250
00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:26,900
OH, HONEY, IT WAS JUST --
251
00:09:26,967 --> 00:09:29,069
WELL, YEAH, IT WAS
REALLY THAT BAD.
252
00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:31,204
I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.
I'M SURE IT'S NOTHING.
253
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,440
JUST HAVE MANUEL HELP YOU
WITH THE TASTING
254
00:09:33,506 --> 00:09:34,875
FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT.
255
00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:36,910
PARIS IS GOING TO DRIVE ME
COMPLETELY INSANE.
256
00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:38,311
OOH, THAT LOOKS GOOD.
257
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:39,479
NO!
NO!
NO!
258
00:09:39,546 --> 00:09:41,381
GEEZ!
BE HAPPY YOU'RE LOVED, HON.
259
00:09:41,448 --> 00:09:43,851
I GOT A KIT KAT IN MY PURSE.
260
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,086
WHAT'S UP?
I DON'T KNOW, IT'S WEIRD.
261
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:47,721
SOOKIE MUST BE SICK
OR SOMETHING.
262
00:09:47,788 --> 00:09:49,957
SOOKIE NEVER GETS SICK.
I KNOW. SHE'LL BE FINE.
263
00:09:50,023 --> 00:09:52,826
SO, WHAT DID PARIS DO NOW?
IT'S JUST PARIS.
264
00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:54,962
THERE'S THIS SPEECH CONTEST
FOR THE BICENTENNIAL,
265
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:56,997
AND I WASN'T EVEN GOING
TO ENTER IT,
266
00:09:57,064 --> 00:09:59,066
BUT WITH THE WHOLE
"IT'S MY LAST CHANCE
267
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,268
TO CRUSH YOU
BEFORE GRADUATION" COMMENT,
268
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,870
I WANT TO ENTER, AND WIN,
269
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,706
AND DANCE AROUND HER
SAYING, "I WIN, I WIN, I WIN!"
270
00:10:05,773 --> 00:10:07,741
YOU'RE GETTING MORE
AND MORE LIKE ME EVERYDAY.
271
00:10:07,808 --> 00:10:09,977
I KNOW IT'S PETTY.
I SHOULD JUST IGNORE HER.
272
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:12,813
THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO.
THAT IS WHAT I WILL DO.
273
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,247
HOW COME YOU
WEREN'T GONNA ENTER?
274
00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:16,083
I DON'T KNOW.
YOU LOVE SCHOOL THINGS.
275
00:10:16,149 --> 00:10:17,785
I DON'T LOVE
DOING SCHOOL THINGS
276
00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:20,120
WHEN IT INVOLVES THE ENTIRE
SCHOOL STARING AT ME.
277
00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:22,155
YOU HAD TO GIVE YOUR
VICE-PRESIDENTIAL
ACCEPTANCE SPEECH
278
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:23,791
IN FRONT OF
THE ENTIRE SCHOOL.
279
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:25,225
BUT I HAD TO DO THAT.
280
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:27,661
OH, SO YOU'RE JUST GONNA
GO THROUGH LIFE
281
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:29,730
ONLY DOING WHAT YOU
HAVE TO DO?
282
00:10:29,797 --> 00:10:31,231
WELL...NO.
283
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:33,066
BECAUSE A PERSON
WHO WANTS TO BE
284
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:35,002
A FOREIGN CORRESPONDENT
FOR A LIVING
285
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,770
SHOULD PROBABLY EMBRACE
THE OPPORTUNITY
286
00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:39,206
TO PRACTICE HER SPEECHING SKILLS
IN FRONT OF A CROWD.
287
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:40,908
YOU HAD THE
MOTHERLY EDGE GOING
288
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:42,943
UNTIL YOU THREW IN THE
"SPEECHING SKILLS" COMMENT.
289
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,378
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
290
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:47,414
OKAY, I'LL GO OUT
FOR THE SPEECH.
GOOD.
291
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,450
AND IF GET TO DO THE
"I WIN, I WIN" DANCE,
292
00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:51,685
SO MUCH THE BETTER.
293
00:10:51,752 --> 00:10:54,054
FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED.
MM-HMM.
294
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:58,025
OH, MY GOD!
HMM?
295
00:10:58,091 --> 00:11:00,260
My God.
296
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:01,461
YOU'RE PREGNANT!
297
00:11:01,528 --> 00:11:03,196
AAHHH!
AAHHH!
298
00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:04,865
OH, MY GOD!
I'M PREGNANT!
299
00:11:04,932 --> 00:11:06,700
YOU'RE PREGNANT?!
300
00:11:17,277 --> 00:11:18,912
HUH.
WHAT?
301
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:20,948
THAT JUST LOOKS
MORE THAN 4,000 WORDS,
302
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,582
BUT I'M SURE YOU COUNTED THEM.
303
00:11:22,649 --> 00:11:24,885
I DID.
GOOD.
304
00:11:24,952 --> 00:11:26,386
HEY, SHELLY, GOOD LUCK,
305
00:11:26,453 --> 00:11:28,421
ALTHOUGH I'M SURE
YOU'RE GOING TO BE GREAT.
306
00:11:28,488 --> 00:11:30,057
AFTER ALL, THERE'S HARDLY
ANYTHING ONSTAGE
307
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:32,292
FOR YOU TO TRIP OVER
THIS TIME, RIGHT?
308
00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:37,197
* I'VE GOT MY BEANS
AT GRANDMA'S HOUSE *
309
00:11:37,264 --> 00:11:39,199
* MY MAGIC BEANS
AT GRANDMA'S HOUSE *
310
00:11:39,266 --> 00:11:40,600
STOP IT.
311
00:11:40,667 --> 00:11:43,904
* MY BEANS, MY MAGIC BEANS,
WHO'S GOT THE BEANS? *
312
00:11:43,971 --> 00:11:45,238
YOU CAN'T RATTLE ME.
313
00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:46,740
* INTO THE WOODS
AT GRANDMA'S -- *
314
00:11:46,807 --> 00:11:49,009
LOOK, I'M PROUD
OF MY PART, OKAY?
315
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:51,144
THE NEW YORK TIMES
CALLED ME "WINNINGLY NAIVE."
316
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:53,380
* INTO THE WOODS,
INTO THE WOODS -- *
317
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:54,647
STOP IT RIGHT NOW.
318
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,316
I KNOW. THAT IS ONE
ANNOYING SONG.
319
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:58,919
LEAVE BRAD ALONE
AND STOP TERRORIZING EVERYONE.
320
00:11:58,986 --> 00:12:00,954
TERRORIZING? WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT TERRORIZING?
321
00:12:01,021 --> 00:12:02,923
I'M SIMPLY TALKING
TO MY FELLOW CLASSMATES.
322
00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:05,125
YOU'RE SCARING THEM
INTO DOING BADLY TO WIN.
323
00:12:05,192 --> 00:12:06,827
I AM NOT.
OH, REALLY?
324
00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,461
AND THAT "MAGICAL BEAN"
RECITAL BACK THERE?
325
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:11,098
I WAS TRYING TO GIVE THE KID
SOME HUMAN CONTACT.
326
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,400
HE'S BEEN TALKING
TO NOTHING BUT A COW.
327
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:15,602
THERE WAS A PERSON
INSIDE THAT COW!
328
00:12:15,668 --> 00:12:16,970
BRAD LANGFORD.
329
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:18,205
I'M WINNINGLY NAIVE!
330
00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:19,506
OKAY.
331
00:12:20,841 --> 00:12:22,776
BRAD...
YOU GOT YOUR BEANS?
332
00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,978
STOP.
GO, BRAD. YOU'LL BE GREAT.
333
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:30,250
IT'S AMAZING HOW YOU MANAGE
TO HIDE THOSE BOLTS
334
00:12:30,317 --> 00:12:32,685
ON THE SIDE OF YOUR NECK.
WHAT IS THAT?
335
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,254
RORY, LOWER YOUR VOICE.
336
00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:36,890
PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO
CONCENTRATE.
337
00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:38,425
WOW.
WOW, WHAT?
338
00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,794
YOUR SPEECH MUST REALLY SUCK.
EXCUSE ME.
339
00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:42,629
IF YOU'RE GOING TO
ALL THIS TROUBLE
340
00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:43,997
TO PSYCH OUT EVERYONE ELSE,
341
00:12:44,064 --> 00:12:46,233
THEN YOU MUST KNOW YOU
HAVE A LOSER THERE.
342
00:12:46,299 --> 00:12:48,568
MIND GAMES --
NOT YOUR FORTE, CUPCAKE.
343
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:51,371
STICK TO TALKING TO LOSERS
OFF THE TRAIN TRACKS.
344
00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:54,808
YOU'RE HORRIBLE.
AND I'M GOING TO WIN.
345
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,010
CHERRY, HI.
346
00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:59,346
MAN, THOSE BRACES
ARE SHINY.
347
00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:01,882
[CELLPHONE RINGS]
348
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:07,620
HELLO?
349
00:13:07,687 --> 00:13:10,157
Sookie: It's me.
350
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:12,059
EVERY DETAIL --
LEAVE NOTHING OUT.
351
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:13,393
WELL, I TOLD HIM.
352
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:15,963
DID HE FLIP? DID HE CRY?
DID HE SCREAM?
353
00:13:16,029 --> 00:13:18,065
NO.
No? Did he hear you?
354
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,266
YEAH, HE HEARD ME.
355
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:20,700
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WHAT HAPPENED?
356
00:13:20,767 --> 00:13:22,335
I CAME HOME,
I GOT SOME FLOWERS
357
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:24,771
I CHILLED SOME GLASSES,
I PUT SOME MUSIC ON
358
00:13:24,838 --> 00:13:26,606
I OPENED A BOTTLE
OF CHAMPAGNE
359
00:13:26,673 --> 00:13:30,277
AND THE CORK BROKE THE WINDOW,
SO I HAD TO CLEAN UP THE GLASS,
360
00:13:30,343 --> 00:13:32,512
AND THEN I TAPED SOME
CARDBOARD OVER THE HOLE,
361
00:13:32,579 --> 00:13:34,848
AND THEN I KNOCKED OVER
THE BOTTLE CHAMPAGNE --
362
00:13:34,915 --> 00:13:36,416
HIT THE
FAST-FORWARD BUTTON, HON.
363
00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:39,052
SO, HE CAME HOME
AND I HANDED HIM A BEER
364
00:13:39,119 --> 00:13:42,489
I SMILED, KISSED HIM, TOLD HIM
HE WAS GONNA BE A DADDY.
365
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:43,857
AND THEN HE DID WHAT?
366
00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:45,492
THEN HE GOT OUT
THE CALCULATOR.
What?
367
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:47,327
HE'S BEEN CRUNCHING NUMBERS
FOR TWO HOURS.
368
00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:49,096
He didn't say anything?
NO.
369
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:52,565
"MR. I WANT FOUR IN FOUR" HEARS
HE CAN CHECK OFF NUMBER ONE
370
00:13:52,632 --> 00:13:53,633
AND HE SAYS NOTHING?
371
00:13:53,700 --> 00:13:55,402
OKAY, NOT NOTHING.
THANK YOU.
372
00:13:55,468 --> 00:13:57,871
EVERY 15 MINUTES
HE SAYS, "OH, BOY."
373
00:13:57,938 --> 00:13:59,506
"OH, BOY" LIKE "OH, BOY!"?
374
00:13:59,572 --> 00:14:01,942
NO, LIKE "OH, BOY."
375
00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:03,576
Jackson: OH, BOY.
376
00:14:03,643 --> 00:14:04,611
Did you hear that?
377
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,246
WELL, MAYBE HE'S IN SHOCK.
378
00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:07,780
OH, BOY.
379
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:09,983
MAYBE.
OH, BOY.
380
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:12,519
I'D TAKE THAT CALCULATOR AWAY
IF I WERE YOU.
381
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,587
THIS WASN'T HOW
IT WAS SUPPOSED TO GO.
382
00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:17,524
I KNOW, BUT GIVE IT TIME.
IT'S A BIG THING.
383
00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:18,858
HE SAID HE WANTED THIS.
384
00:14:18,926 --> 00:14:21,061
HE LOVES YOU.
HE WANTS THIS.
385
00:14:21,128 --> 00:14:23,763
OH, BOY!
UH-HUH.
386
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:25,398
HANG IN THERE.
CALL YOU LATER.
387
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:26,967
I'LL BE HERE.
388
00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:29,736
OH, BOY.
389
00:14:29,802 --> 00:14:30,837
OH, BOY.
390
00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,239
OH, BOY!
391
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:34,474
[ SIGHS ]
392
00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:46,753
IT'S RIGHT THERE!
JUST A SECOND!
393
00:14:46,819 --> 00:14:48,555
I SEE IT!
I CAN DO IT!
394
00:14:48,621 --> 00:14:50,991
KIRK, IT'S RIGHT THERE!
YOU ARE YELLING AT ME!
395
00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:52,926
THAT'S NOT THE WAY
TO GET RESULTS.
396
00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,161
YOU KEEP PASSING IT!
397
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,762
YOU ARE MAKING ME CRAZY!
398
00:14:55,828 --> 00:14:58,098
OH, HEY,
THAT'S MY WATER BILL.
399
00:14:58,165 --> 00:14:59,933
HE'S BEEN DOWN THERE
FOR 20 MINUTES.
400
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,969
KIRK, YOU HAVE TO SORT
THE MAIL FIRST.
401
00:15:02,035 --> 00:15:04,004
EVERYBODY IS ALWAYS
TELLING ME WHAT TO DO!
402
00:15:04,071 --> 00:15:05,638
EVERYBODY ELSE IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
403
00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:08,275
WELL, SORRY, BUT I'M
THE MAIL CARRIER IN THIS TOWN.
404
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:10,710
I'LL CARRY THE MAIL
THE WAY I CARRY IT.
405
00:15:10,777 --> 00:15:12,312
OTHERWISE, YOU CAN CARRY IT,
406
00:15:12,379 --> 00:15:15,382
BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO APPLY FOR
THE JOB FIRST AND GET HIRED.
407
00:15:15,448 --> 00:15:18,018
THERE'S A TEST,
AND IT'S A HARD TEST, MY FRIEND!
408
00:15:18,085 --> 00:15:19,452
OW! PAPER CUT!
409
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,188
DEAN, I NEED NON-DROWSY
ALLERGY MEDICINE.
410
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:23,223
DID YOU CHECK IN THE BACK
WITH ASPIRIN?
411
00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:24,657
YEAH, NOTHING.
THEN WE'RE PROBABLY OUT.
412
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,893
I COULD TELL YOU WHEN
THEY'RE EXPECTED IN,
413
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,528
BUT I HAVEN'T GOTTEN
THE MAIL YET!
414
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,563
NEVER MIND. I'LL GRAB
SOME AT HARTFORD.
415
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,099
GET MY WATER BILL FOR ME.
416
00:15:32,165 --> 00:15:33,733
I'LL DO MY BEST.
417
00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,703
I'M GIVING YOU 5 MINUTES,
THEN I'M GETTING THE MOP.
418
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,271
YOU WILL NOT TOUCH THIS!
419
00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:41,041
THIS IS THE PROPERTY OF
THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT.
420
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:46,980
OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.
421
00:15:47,047 --> 00:15:50,283
UHHHH...OKAY.
422
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:51,684
OKAY.
423
00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:54,321
SHOW ME A DIFFERENCE, PEOPLE.
WHY CAN'T I PICK ONE?
424
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:57,824
OOH! ON SALE -- THAT'S IT.
425
00:15:57,890 --> 00:15:59,392
I'M DONE.
426
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,061
MAX.
LORELAI.
427
00:16:01,128 --> 00:16:02,295
HI.
HI BACK.
428
00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:04,297
I DIDN'T KNOW...YOU...
HAD A COLD.
429
00:16:04,364 --> 00:16:06,099
I JUST RECENTLY FOUND OUT
MYSELF.
430
00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:09,602
WELL...WOW...YOU...HI.
431
00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:11,238
[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
432
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:12,272
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?
433
00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:13,306
I'VE BEEN GOOD.
GOOD.
434
00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:14,607
I'VE BEEN IN CALIFORNIA.
435
00:16:14,674 --> 00:16:16,009
COWABUNGA, DUDE.
436
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,777
YES, THAT'S MY OFFICIAL
CALIFORNIA NAME.
437
00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:19,379
SO, CALIFORNIA, HUH?
438
00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:21,614
STANFORD -- I WAS
TEACHING A CLASS THERE.
439
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:23,850
IT'S ABOUT TIME THAT DUMP
GOT SOME DECENT TEACHERS.
440
00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:26,886
YES, THEY'RE REALLY TRYING TO
TURN THE PLACE AROUND.
441
00:16:26,953 --> 00:16:28,421
SO IF YOU'RE LIVING
IN CALIFORNIA,
442
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,057
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
BACK HERE?
443
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:32,192
THIS PLACE HAS THE BEST
SELECTION --
444
00:16:32,259 --> 00:16:34,461
IN HARTFORD?
MY CLASS ENDED.
445
00:16:34,527 --> 00:16:37,230
I THOUGHT I'D COME BACK
FOR THE CHILTON BICENTENNIAL.
446
00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:39,832
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
IN HARTFORD?
FRIDAY NIGHT.
447
00:16:39,899 --> 00:16:43,070
THE INFAMOUS GILMORE DINNERS.
HOW'S THAT GOING?
448
00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:45,305
GREAT. WE HAD TO ADD ON
AN EXTRA ROOM
449
00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:46,673
FOR ALL THE
EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE,
450
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:48,708
BUT THERE'S BEEN
NO BLOODSHED AS OF YET.
451
00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:50,810
I'M GLAD TO HEAR IT.
AND RORY'S GOOD?
452
00:16:50,877 --> 00:16:54,547
YEAH, SHE'S THE
"ENCYCLOPEDIA BRITANNICA"
DEFINITION OF "GOOD."
453
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:55,915
GRADES?
PERFECT.
454
00:16:55,982 --> 00:16:57,950
SAME BOYFRIEND?
DIFFERENT BOYFRIEND.
455
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,452
REALLY?
YEAH.
456
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:01,088
YOU HATE HIM.
NO, I DON'T.
457
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:03,356
YOU REALLY HATE HIM.
I SMILE, I SAY HI.
458
00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:05,492
I LET HIM EAT
THE GOOD COOKIES.
459
00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:06,626
YOU WANT HIM KILLED.
460
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,661
ONLY IF I GET
A REALLY GOOD PRICE.
461
00:17:08,728 --> 00:17:11,431
SHE'S YOUNG. SHE'LL MOVE ON.
SHE'S GOT COLLEGE NEXT YEAR.
462
00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:13,233
GREAT! FRAT BOYS --
I CANNOT WAIT.
463
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,268
JUST GET A KEG.
IT KEEPS THEM DISTRACTED.
464
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:18,004
THANKS FOR THE ADVICE.
I'LL LOCK HER IN A TOWER.
465
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,506
GLAD I COULD HELP.
466
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:22,409
WELL, LISTEN, I HAVE THIS
DINNER I HAVE TO GET TO.
467
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:25,212
OH, YEAH...ME TOO.
ME TOO.
468
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:28,181
IT WAS NICE TO SEE YOU.
NICE TO SEE YOU, TOO.
469
00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:31,084
BYE.
BYE.
470
00:17:38,958 --> 00:17:40,393
AH, YOU'RE HERE.
471
00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:42,429
YOU ARE BY FAR THE MOST
MASCULINE-LOOKING MAID
472
00:17:42,495 --> 00:17:44,464
MY PARENTS HAVE EVER HAD.
IT'S CHAOS HERE.
473
00:17:44,531 --> 00:17:46,699
SECOND MAID CALLED IN SICK,
FIRST'S BUSY WITH DINNER,
474
00:17:46,766 --> 00:17:48,735
AND YOUR POOR MOTHER
IS AT THE HOSPITAL.
475
00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:51,804
HER D.A.R. GROUP SUFFERED A
SURFEIT OF STROKES THIS WEEK.
476
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:53,840
COME AGAIN?
THREE OF HER FRIENDS
HAD STROKES.
477
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:57,310
AND NOW SHE IS HOPPING FROM
SICKBED TO SICKBED
478
00:17:57,377 --> 00:17:59,646
OFFERING WHATEVER COMFORT
SHE CAN.
479
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:01,114
THREE D.A.R. STROKES?
480
00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:03,116
WHAT'S IN THAT WATER
THEY'RE DRINKING?
481
00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,651
WELL, A LITTLE WHISKEY,
USUALLY.
482
00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:06,085
OH, AND YOU'RE FORGETTING
LIESEL.
483
00:18:06,153 --> 00:18:07,920
WHAT?
OUR EAST GERMAN MAID.
484
00:18:07,987 --> 00:18:09,956
SHE WAS MUCH MORE
MASCULINE-LOOKING THAN ME.
485
00:18:10,022 --> 00:18:11,591
RIGHT,
WITH THE MUTTONCHOPS.
486
00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:13,826
HERE IS RORY.
THANKS. I WOULDN'T HAVE
RECOGNIZED HER.
487
00:18:13,893 --> 00:18:16,095
HI, HON.
DID YOU HEAR
ABOUT THE STROKES?
488
00:18:16,163 --> 00:18:18,331
STAY AWAY FROM WHISKEY
AND THE D.A.R.
489
00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:21,168
YOUR MOTHER WOULD MAKE YOU
THROW THAT OUT AT THIS POINT.
490
00:18:21,234 --> 00:18:23,203
HOW ABOUT I EXCHANGE IT
FOR A MARTINI?
491
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:25,372
COMING UP.
492
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,940
OH, GOOD.
I'M EXPECTING AN IMPORTANT CALL.
493
00:18:28,007 --> 00:18:29,242
THIS COULD BE IT.
494
00:18:29,309 --> 00:18:31,478
UH, DAD, IF THE MAID
IS BUSY WITH DINNER
495
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:34,147
AND THE SECOND ONE'S OUT
AND MOM'S AT THE HOSPITAL...
496
00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:36,216
OH, RIGHT, RIGHT.
I'LL GET IT!
497
00:18:36,983 --> 00:18:38,185
ALONE AT LAST.
498
00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:39,819
HAVE I GOT SOMETHING
TO TELL YOU.
499
00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:42,522
WHAT?
MAYBE YOU HAVE
SOMETHING TO TELL ME.
500
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,157
DON'T DO THAT.
I HAVE NOTHING.
501
00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:46,359
OR ARE YOU MINIMIZING
WHAT YOU KNOW?
502
00:18:46,426 --> 00:18:48,261
MAYBE YOU SHOULD
"MAXIMIZE" IT.
503
00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:49,696
I'M CONFUSED.
504
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:51,298
"MAX-IMIZE" IT.
505
00:18:51,364 --> 00:18:53,666
I'M MAXIMUM CONFUSED.
506
00:18:53,733 --> 00:18:54,901
[ SIGHS ]
507
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:56,303
I RAN INTO MAX.
MEDINA?
508
00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:58,538
AT THE PHARMACY.
DID YOU KNOW HE WAS BACK?
509
00:18:58,605 --> 00:19:01,508
NO. HE WAS
ON LOAN SOMEWHERE.
YEAH, AT STANFORD.
510
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:04,577
HE'S BACK NOW FOR
A LITTLE WHILE,
AND I'M HAPPY TO REPORT
511
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:07,013
EITHER HE'S FORGIVEN ME
FOR TREATING HIM SO BADLY,
512
00:19:07,079 --> 00:19:09,382
OR I BUILT IT UP WORSE
IN MY HEAD.
513
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:11,684
OH, NO.
YOU TREATED HIM LIKE CRAP.
514
00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:13,520
WELL, HE WAS VERY BIG
ABOUT IT.
515
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:15,355
HE DIDN'T RECOIL
OR BLOW ME OFF.
516
00:19:15,422 --> 00:19:18,191
WE HAD A NICE CHAT.
IT WAS GOOD TO SEE HIM.
517
00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:20,427
HE'S A GREAT GUY.
HE IS.
518
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:22,795
AND A GREAT TEACHER, TOO.
I'M GLAD HE'S BACK.
519
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:25,232
GOOD. HE SEEMED GLAD, TOO.
THAT WAS NOT MY CALL.
520
00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:29,902
AND FOR A SECOND THERE
I THOUGHT A FOURTH FRIEND OF
YOUR MOTHER'S HAD HAD A STROKE.
521
00:19:29,969 --> 00:19:31,504
BUT THEN I REALIZED
522
00:19:31,571 --> 00:19:33,940
THAT IT WAS ONE OF THE ORIGINAL
STROKE LADY'S HUSBANDS
523
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:37,210
CALLING TO INFORM ME
OF HER STROKE,
WHICH WE ALREADY KNEW ABOUT.
524
00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:38,345
THANK GOD.
525
00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:39,779
SO, RORY
HAS BEEN TELLING ME
526
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,848
ABOUT THE CHILTON BICENTENNIAL
AND HER SPEECH.
527
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:44,717
IT'S NOT MY SPEECH YET.
I HAVE TO QUALIFY.
528
00:19:44,784 --> 00:19:47,354
YOU'LL GET IT.
SHE'LL BE ON C-SPAN
IF SHE DOES.
529
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:49,589
VERY GOOD.
IT'S NOT LIKE ANYONE
WOULD WATCH IT.
530
00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:52,425
YES, THEY WILL. YOU'RE A HELL
OF A LOT MORE INTERESTING
531
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:54,494
THAN USUAL SHOW THEY HAVE
WITH ALL WHITE MEN
532
00:19:54,561 --> 00:19:57,530
WALKING AROUND THAT BIG,
EMPTY CHAMBER
WITH NUMBERS ALL OVER THEM.
533
00:19:57,597 --> 00:20:00,132
THAT'S A TELEVISED HOUSE VOTE,
AND I FIND THAT FASCINATING.
534
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:02,735
IT'S LIKE WATCHING THE MEN'S
WAREHOUSE SECURITY CAMERA.
535
00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:05,204
WHEN IS YOUR SPEECH?
I'D LIKE TO BE THERE.
536
00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:08,541
AGAIN, IT'S NOT MY SPEECH YET,
BUT IT'S FRIDAY AT 5:00.
537
00:20:08,608 --> 00:20:11,378
OH. THAT'S TOUGH.
COULD THEY MOVE IT TO 6:00?
538
00:20:11,444 --> 00:20:12,645
I DON'T THINK SO.
539
00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:14,347
WELL, MAYBE I'LL MOVE
MY THING.
540
00:20:14,414 --> 00:20:15,582
THAT MIGHT BE BEST.
541
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,049
[ PHONE RINGING ]
I'VE GOT IT.
542
00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:19,419
I'VE GOT IT!
I'VE GOT IT!!
543
00:20:19,486 --> 00:20:21,321
[ CHUCKLES ]
WHAT?
544
00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:22,489
SPEED DIAL.
545
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,324
I JUST LIKE SEEING HIM
DO THAT.
546
00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:25,692
I'VE GOT IT!
547
00:20:25,758 --> 00:20:28,695
AH! THANK GOD! SOMEONE SANE!
COME ON UP!
548
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:30,630
YOUR PHONE HAS BEEN BUSY
ALL NIGHT,
549
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:33,266
AND I AM DYING TO KNOW
WHAT THE DOCTOR SAID.
550
00:20:33,333 --> 00:20:36,135
HE SAID, "CONGRATULATIONS,
IT'S AN IT!"
551
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:37,837
AH!
I LOVE BEING PREGNANT!
552
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:40,607
YOU'LL GIVE ME
LOTS OF TIPS.
WHAT I CAN REMEMBER.
553
00:20:40,673 --> 00:20:43,443
GET YOUR DIARY OUT
'CAUSE I WANT TO KNOW IT ALL.
554
00:20:43,510 --> 00:20:46,713
A LOT OF MY DIARY FROM THAT YEAR
WAS A DEBATE
555
00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,581
OVER WHICH MEMBER
OF TEARS FOR FEARS
556
00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:50,417
I LOVED MORE
AT THAT PARTICULAR MOMENT.
557
00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:52,452
THAT'S PROBABLY NOT GOING
TO HELP ME MUCH.
558
00:20:52,519 --> 00:20:54,487
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
OUT HERE? IT'S COLD.
559
00:20:54,554 --> 00:20:56,523
WELL, WE FINISHED EATING,
I NEEDED A BREAK.
560
00:20:56,589 --> 00:20:58,758
ROUGH DAY. WE DIDN'T
GET HOME UNTIL 8:00.
561
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:00,593
EIGHT? YOUR APPOINTMENT
WAS AT 6:00.
562
00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:03,596
JACKSON WON'T DRIVE HOME
FASTER THAN 7 MILES AN HOUR.
563
00:21:03,663 --> 00:21:05,231
HE DOESN'T WANT
TO JIGGLE BABY.
564
00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:06,666
OH, MY GOD.
565
00:21:06,733 --> 00:21:08,701
WE SPENT 10 MINUTES
ON ONE SPEED BUMP.
566
00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,670
I COULD'VE WALKED HOME
FASTER.
567
00:21:10,737 --> 00:21:12,705
HE'S GOT THIS WILD LOOK
IN HIS EYE,
568
00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:14,541
LIKE HE'S SOME KIND
OF DEATH ROCKER.
569
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:16,376
AND HE KEEPS MAKING LOTS
OF CALLS,
570
00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:18,778
HE PUNCHED THE CALCULATOR
SO MUCH HE BROKE IT.
571
00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:20,513
WE'RE SELLING THE TRUCK.
WHAT?!
572
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:22,248
THEN WE CAN AFFORD
THE MINIVAN.
573
00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:24,216
I THOUGHT YOU BROKE
THE CALCULATOR.
574
00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:25,652
I'M USING A PENCIL.
HI, LORELAI.
575
00:21:25,718 --> 00:21:27,153
HI, JACKSON.
CONGRATULATIONS.
576
00:21:27,219 --> 00:21:28,555
WE DON'T NEED A VAN.
577
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,590
I'M GETTING A HAIRCUT,
BUYING A SECOND TIE.
578
00:21:30,657 --> 00:21:33,025
I'LL GET IT.
IT'S PROBABLY THE CONTRACTOR.
WHAT CONTRACTOR?
579
00:21:33,092 --> 00:21:34,727
THE ADD-ON.
WHAT ADD-ON?
580
00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:38,130
THE EXPANSION, SOOKIE.
THE EXPANSION.
581
00:21:38,197 --> 00:21:39,432
HE'S EXPANDING SOMETHING.
582
00:21:39,499 --> 00:21:41,334
HE'S BEING VERY CRYPTIC.
583
00:21:41,401 --> 00:21:42,769
I DON'T WANT
TO EXPAND ANYTHING.
584
00:21:42,835 --> 00:21:45,037
AND DID YOU SEE HIS EYES?
TASMANIAN DEVIL.
585
00:21:45,104 --> 00:21:47,474
WHEN I CAME HOME,
HE WAS BABY-PROOFING THE HOUSE,
586
00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:49,108
HE'D THROWN AWAY ALL OUR
PRESCRIPTION DRUGS,
587
00:21:49,175 --> 00:21:51,744
AND HE WAS STUFFING NEWSPAPER
INTO THE ELECTRICAL SOCKETS.
588
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,480
HE'S INSANE.
589
00:21:53,546 --> 00:21:56,549
WE HAVE TO MOVE OUT FOR
THREE MONTHS TO DO THE ADD-ON.
590
00:21:56,616 --> 00:21:59,652
WE PROBABLY DON'T WANT
TO DO THAT.
PROBABLY NOT.
591
00:21:59,719 --> 00:22:01,120
HAVE YOU TRIED
SLAPPING HIM?
592
00:22:01,187 --> 00:22:03,956
NO. HE WON'T LET ME
LIFT MY ARM ABOVE MY HEAD
593
00:22:04,023 --> 00:22:05,792
IN CASE IT STRETCHES BABY.
THIS STINKS.
594
00:22:05,858 --> 00:22:07,427
WE NEVER EVEN GOT TO CELEBRATE.
595
00:22:07,494 --> 00:22:09,562
HE WENT STRAIGHT TO BUDGETS
AND MINIVANS.
596
00:22:09,629 --> 00:22:11,564
OH, WELL,
WHAT HE'S DOING IS SWEET
597
00:22:11,631 --> 00:22:14,401
IN ITS OWN OBNOXIOUS WAY.
598
00:22:14,467 --> 00:22:17,236
I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO LET HIM
BE MALE.
599
00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:19,572
SO, LISTEN, UM,
I RAN INTO MAX MEDINA.
600
00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:22,409
OH, MY GOD. REALLY?
HOW WEIRD WAS THAT?
601
00:22:22,475 --> 00:22:24,611
LITTLE. NOT AS MUCH
AS I WOULD'VE THOUGHT.
602
00:22:24,677 --> 00:22:26,345
HE'S SUCH A GOOD GUY.
YEAH.
603
00:22:26,413 --> 00:22:27,814
PEOPLE ARE PRETTY UNANIMOUS
ON THAT.
604
00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:29,882
WELL, WAS HE NICE TO YOU?
VERY.
605
00:22:29,949 --> 00:22:32,051
WHAT HAPPENED WITH US
WAS SO LONG AGO.
606
00:22:32,118 --> 00:22:34,687
DO YOU THINK WHAT I DID
TO HIM WAS HORRIBLE?
607
00:22:34,754 --> 00:22:36,723
YOU MEAN DUMPING HIM
IN THE GUTTER? SURE.
608
00:22:36,789 --> 00:22:38,691
PEOPLE ARE PRETTY UNANIMOUS
ON THAT, TOO.
609
00:22:38,758 --> 00:22:40,226
SO, MAX MEDINA'S BACK.
610
00:22:40,292 --> 00:22:43,262
NOT FOR LONG, THOUGH.
I JUST HOPE HE DOESN'T HATE ME.
611
00:22:43,329 --> 00:22:45,398
HE WAS PROBABLY
JUST BEING NICE.
612
00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:46,833
YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT HIM.
613
00:22:46,899 --> 00:22:50,202
I'LL WRITE HIM A NOTE
OR SOMETHING.
614
00:22:50,269 --> 00:22:51,604
I OWE HIM THAT.
615
00:22:52,739 --> 00:22:54,474
[ SCREAM ]
WHAT IS THIS?
616
00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:55,975
IT'S MY CLEAVER.
617
00:22:56,042 --> 00:22:57,477
WHAT IF BABY FELL ON IT?
618
00:22:57,544 --> 00:23:00,480
YOU MEAN WHAT IF BABY
ROLLED OFF THE SINK
619
00:23:00,547 --> 00:23:03,516
AND INTO THE OPEN
SECOND DRAWER?
620
00:23:03,583 --> 00:23:05,217
IT WOULDN'T BE GOOD.
621
00:23:05,284 --> 00:23:07,754
IT HAS TO GO.
I NEED IT TO CHOP STUFF.
622
00:23:07,820 --> 00:23:10,857
WE'RE SWITCHING TO PLASTIC.
I CAN'T USE PLASTIC!
623
00:23:10,923 --> 00:23:12,959
AND THE SARAN WRAP'S
HISTORY, TOO.
624
00:23:13,025 --> 00:23:13,993
JACKSON!
625
00:23:15,261 --> 00:23:17,830
[PHONE RINGING]
626
00:23:20,567 --> 00:23:21,934
YES, HELLO?
627
00:23:22,001 --> 00:23:24,070
Rory Gilmore, please.
THIS IS RORY GILMORE.
628
00:23:24,136 --> 00:23:27,139
I'm connecting Headmaster
Charleston and Paris Geller.
629
00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:28,575
WHAT? YOU'RE WHAT? HELLO?
630
00:23:28,641 --> 00:23:30,610
Miss Gilmore?
I'M HERE.
631
00:23:30,677 --> 00:23:32,111
Miss Geller?
I'M HERE.
632
00:23:32,178 --> 00:23:35,014
Please hold. I'm connecting
Headmaster Charleston.
633
00:23:36,949 --> 00:23:39,952
Miss Gilmore, Miss Geller,
you have Headmaster Charleston.
634
00:23:40,019 --> 00:23:42,655
LADIES, HELLO. I HOPE YOU'RE
HAVING A PLEASANT EVENING.
635
00:23:42,722 --> 00:23:44,190
Yes, sir.
Very pleasant.
636
00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:47,026
WONDERFUL TO HEAR. WELL, LET'S
GET DOWN TO IT, SHALL WE?
637
00:23:47,093 --> 00:23:49,662
I WAS VERY IMPRESSED WITH BOTH
OF YOUR SPEECHES TODAY.
638
00:23:49,729 --> 00:23:51,363
THEY WERE WELL-WRITTEN,
WELL-RESEARCHED,
639
00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:53,700
AND ELOQUENTLY DELIVERED.
YOU SHOULD BE VERY PROUD.
640
00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:55,535
THANK YOU. WE WERE.
WHO WON?
641
00:23:55,602 --> 00:23:58,070
JUST THE SIMPLE ACT OF
COMPLETING A TASK WELL
642
00:23:58,137 --> 00:24:00,707
IS IN ITSELF A WIN,
IS IT NOT, MISS GELLER?
643
00:24:00,773 --> 00:24:02,274
YES, SIR.
Wonderful.
644
00:24:02,341 --> 00:24:04,911
ANYHOW, AS I WAS LISTENING
TO YOU BOTH THIS AFTERNOON,
645
00:24:04,977 --> 00:24:06,946
THE THOUGHT KEPT ROLLING
AROUND IN MY HEAD.
646
00:24:07,013 --> 00:24:10,817
I WAS THINKING WHAT A PITY IT IS
I WILL HAVE TO CHOOSE JUST ONE.
647
00:24:10,883 --> 00:24:12,652
THEN I REALIZED,
"HOLD ON A MINUTE.
648
00:24:12,719 --> 00:24:14,086
"I'M THE HEADMASTER
OF THIS SCHOOL.
649
00:24:14,153 --> 00:24:15,722
"I'M IN CHARGE
OF THIS COMPETITION.
650
00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:18,157
I CAN CHANGE THE RULES
IF I WISH TO."
651
00:24:18,224 --> 00:24:19,225
SO I AM.
652
00:24:19,291 --> 00:24:20,459
YOU ARE...
YOU ARE WHAT?
653
00:24:20,527 --> 00:24:21,961
I AM CHANGING THE RULES.
654
00:24:22,028 --> 00:24:25,131
INSTEAD OF HAVING ONE SPEAKER
AT OUR BICENTENNIAL,
655
00:24:25,197 --> 00:24:26,733
WE WILL HAVE TWO.
656
00:24:26,799 --> 00:24:29,135
YOU WILL COMBINE YOUR SPEECHES
AND PRESENT THEM TOGETHER.
657
00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:31,303
YOU'RE KIDDING.
I ASSURE YOU I AM NOT.
658
00:24:31,370 --> 00:24:35,174
I THINK IT'LL BE AN EXCELLENT
WAY TO PAY PROPER TRIBUTE
TO OUR SCHOOL.
659
00:24:35,241 --> 00:24:36,576
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?
660
00:24:36,643 --> 00:24:37,644
WELL...
IT'S, UH...
661
00:24:37,710 --> 00:24:39,278
Brilliant, yes.
I think so, too.
662
00:24:39,345 --> 00:24:41,213
THAT'S ALL.
CONGRATULATIONS.
663
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,650
I WOULD LIKE THE REVISED COPY
OF YOUR SPEECH
664
00:24:43,716 --> 00:24:45,985
ON MY DESK BY TUESDAY.
665
00:24:46,052 --> 00:24:48,354
ENJOY THE REST
OF YOUR WEEKEND.
666
00:24:48,420 --> 00:24:51,758
WELL, LOOK WHO'S SUDDENLY
DECIDED TO BECOME KOFI ANNAN.
667
00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:54,193
EXCUSE ME?
CHARLESTON THINKS
WE NEED TO PLAY NICE,
668
00:24:54,260 --> 00:24:56,462
SO HE SCREWS UP
THE WHOLE BICENTENNIAL.
669
00:24:56,529 --> 00:24:58,464
THIS SUCKS.
YES, IT DOES SUCK.
670
00:24:58,531 --> 00:25:01,300
SO WHAT DO WE DO NOW?
DO WE HAVE A CHOICE?
671
00:25:01,367 --> 00:25:03,035
OF COURSE.
YOU COULD SAY NO.
672
00:25:03,102 --> 00:25:05,572
WHY COULD I SAY NO?
YOU COULD SAY NO.
673
00:25:05,638 --> 00:25:07,640
I COULDN'T.
C-SPAN IS GOING TO BE THERE.
674
00:25:07,707 --> 00:25:09,709
I LIKE C-SPAN
AS MUCH AS YOU DO.
675
00:25:09,776 --> 00:25:11,143
YOU DO NOT.
I DO, TOO.
676
00:25:11,210 --> 00:25:13,580
ASK MY MOM.
IT'S ALL I TALK ABOUT.
677
00:25:15,514 --> 00:25:18,685
SO I GUESS WE NEED
A GAME PLAN NOW.
678
00:25:18,751 --> 00:25:22,054
OKAY. WE CAN MEET AT SCHOOL
TOMORROW AND WORK ON IT.
679
00:25:22,121 --> 00:25:24,724
WE COULD DO IT
OVER THE PHONE.
Over the phone?
680
00:25:24,791 --> 00:25:26,192
WE'RE JUST COMBINING
TWO SPEECHES, RORY.
681
00:25:26,258 --> 00:25:29,228
WE DON'T NEED TO SIT TOGETHER
STARING AT EACH OTHER.
682
00:25:29,295 --> 00:25:30,362
FINE, WHATEVER YOU WANT.
683
00:25:30,429 --> 00:25:31,698
TOMORROW NIGHT, 6:00.
684
00:25:31,764 --> 00:25:32,732
I'LL CALL YOU.
685
00:25:32,799 --> 00:25:34,867
I CAN'T WAIT.
686
00:25:43,342 --> 00:25:46,112
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
WE HAVE A SPEECH TO WRITE.
687
00:25:46,178 --> 00:25:49,181
THE PLAN WAS
TO DO IT OVER PHONE.
IT'S A RIDICULOUS PLAN.
688
00:25:49,248 --> 00:25:52,018
WE HAVE TO PUT TWO
SPEECHES TOGETHER,
REHEARSE, HONE OUR TIMING.
689
00:25:52,084 --> 00:25:54,854
IT CAN'T BE DONE
OVER THE PHONE.
IT WAS YOUR IDEA.
690
00:25:54,921 --> 00:25:57,489
LIKE YOU FOUGHT ME
ON IT?
OF COURSE I DIDN'T.
691
00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:59,158
WELL, OKAY, THEN.
692
00:25:59,225 --> 00:26:01,961
OUR CONVERSATION DID NOT
JUST COME TO A CLOSE.
693
00:26:02,028 --> 00:26:04,931
THERE WAS NOT
A DECISION MADE.
LOOK, I'M HERE.
694
00:26:04,997 --> 00:26:08,935
WE SHOULD JUST DO THIS
AND GET IT OVER WITH.
695
00:26:09,001 --> 00:26:10,770
FINE. I'LL GO
TO A PAY PHONE.
696
00:26:10,837 --> 00:26:12,839
DO YOU HAVE PAY PHONES
IN THIS TOWN?
697
00:26:12,905 --> 00:26:15,041
WE'LL DO IT HERE.
WHATEVER YOU SAY.
698
00:26:17,576 --> 00:26:19,345
SO, I THINK
THE FIRST THING TO DO
699
00:26:19,411 --> 00:26:21,580
IS TO ACQUAINT OURSELVES
WITH EACH OTHER'S SPEECHES
700
00:26:21,648 --> 00:26:24,651
SO WE CAN JUDGE WHO HIT
WHAT POINT BEST.
701
00:26:26,052 --> 00:26:27,019
HERE.
702
00:26:27,086 --> 00:26:29,188
[ SIGHS ]
703
00:26:29,255 --> 00:26:30,222
FINE.
704
00:26:30,289 --> 00:26:31,991
GOOD. LET'S READ.
705
00:26:32,058 --> 00:26:35,061
WHY DID YOU USE THIS FONT?
BECAUSE I WAS ON THE CRACK.
706
00:26:35,127 --> 00:26:37,096
DID YOU CHECK
THESE FACTS?
YES, I DID.
707
00:26:37,163 --> 00:26:39,331
THE SPELLING
OF THESE NAMES?
YES, I DID.
708
00:26:39,398 --> 00:26:40,700
RORY?
WHAT, PARIS?
709
00:26:40,767 --> 00:26:43,002
I SLEPT WITH JAMIE.
710
00:26:43,069 --> 00:26:44,804
LAST NIGHT, AFTER WE TALKED.
711
00:26:44,871 --> 00:26:46,272
WAS IT SOMETHING I SAID?
712
00:26:46,338 --> 00:26:49,041
I WENT THERE,
HE LIT A FIRE, WE DID IT.
713
00:26:49,108 --> 00:26:50,810
WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS?
MY THOUGHTS?
714
00:26:50,877 --> 00:26:54,113
BECAUSE I'M NOT EXACTLY SURE
HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT MYSELF YET.
715
00:26:56,048 --> 00:26:58,017
I'VE BEEN GOING OVER IT
IN MY HEAD.
716
00:26:58,084 --> 00:27:00,452
IT SEEMED TO GO PRETTY WELL --
THE FIRE WAS NICE,
717
00:27:00,519 --> 00:27:03,489
AND HE DIDN'T TRY TO PUT ON
ANY RIDICULOUS MAKE-OUT MUSIC.
718
00:27:03,555 --> 00:27:04,824
AND THEN IT JUST HAPPENED.
719
00:27:04,891 --> 00:27:07,059
I WAS ACTUALLY SURPRISED
AT THE TIMING OF IT
720
00:27:07,126 --> 00:27:08,895
BECAUSE I WASN'T WEARING
ANYTHING PARTICULARLY ALLURING,
721
00:27:08,961 --> 00:27:10,930
AND IN THE MOMENTS
JUST BEFORE THE ACT,
722
00:27:10,997 --> 00:27:12,965
WE WERE ACTUALLY DISCUSSING
MODERN-DAY MARXISM IN AMERICA,
723
00:27:13,032 --> 00:27:14,801
WHICH IS NOT
WHAT I WOULD'VE DEEMED
724
00:27:14,867 --> 00:27:16,903
A "COME AND GET IT"
SORT OF CONVERSATION,
725
00:27:16,969 --> 00:27:18,871
NEVERTHELESS
I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT
726
00:27:18,938 --> 00:27:21,107
WHAT THAT MEANS TO ME
ON A PSYCHOLOGICAL LEVEL.
727
00:27:21,173 --> 00:27:23,142
SO I THOUGHT,
MAYBE IF YOU AND I
728
00:27:23,209 --> 00:27:24,977
COULD HAVE A HEALTHY DEBATE
ABOUT IT,
729
00:27:25,044 --> 00:27:26,813
I COULD COME TO SOME
REASONABLE CONCLUSION
730
00:27:26,879 --> 00:27:28,347
ABOUT HOW I SHOULD BE FEELING.
731
00:27:28,414 --> 00:27:30,917
SO, COME ON, TALK.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
732
00:27:30,983 --> 00:27:31,751
I --
733
00:27:31,818 --> 00:27:33,085
ARE YOU PRO?
WELL --
734
00:27:33,152 --> 00:27:35,021
CON? UNDECIDED?
WELL --
735
00:27:35,087 --> 00:27:37,690
PARIS, JUST STOP TALKING
FOR ONE SECOND
736
00:27:37,757 --> 00:27:40,626
AND LET ME GET MY MIND
AROUND THIS.
737
00:27:40,693 --> 00:27:42,695
SORRY. GO AHEAD. FOCUS.
738
00:27:45,031 --> 00:27:48,100
COULD YOU FOCUS FASTER BECAUSE I
REALLY NEED SOME FEEDBACK HERE?
739
00:27:48,167 --> 00:27:53,840
OKAY, SO, YOU ARE TELLING ME
THAT YOU AND JAMIE HAD SEX.
740
00:27:53,906 --> 00:27:56,442
OKAY, SO, WERE YOU SAFE?
741
00:27:56,508 --> 00:27:58,477
YES. IT WAS A REGULAR
"AFTERSCHOOL SPECIAL."
742
00:27:58,544 --> 00:28:02,281
WELL, WAS HE NICE TO YOU?
YES, HE WAS VERY NICE TO ME.
743
00:28:02,348 --> 00:28:05,017
AND THE TWO OF YOU
HAD DISCUSSED THIS --
744
00:28:05,084 --> 00:28:07,453
WELL, I DON'T KNOW THAT WE
ACTUALLY DISCUSSED IT.
745
00:28:07,519 --> 00:28:08,888
IT WAS JUST SORT OF IMPLIED.
746
00:28:08,955 --> 00:28:10,689
IMPLIED?
YES, IMPLIED.
747
00:28:10,757 --> 00:28:12,524
WHEN YOU'RE DATING A BOY,
AND YOU'RE TOGETHER
748
00:28:12,591 --> 00:28:15,161
FOR A GIVEN AMOUNT OF TIME
AND YOU'RE NOT AMISH,
749
00:28:15,227 --> 00:28:17,396
THEN THE EVENTUAL OCCURRENCE
OF INTERCOURSE IS INEVITABLE.
750
00:28:17,463 --> 00:28:18,931
I MEAN, WASN'T IT WITH YOU?
751
00:28:18,998 --> 00:28:20,499
WHAT?
WITH DEAN.
752
00:28:20,566 --> 00:28:21,633
NO.
NO?
753
00:28:21,700 --> 00:28:23,836
NO. I NEVER DID IT
WITH DEAN.
754
00:28:23,903 --> 00:28:26,773
OH. WELL, THEN WITH JESS,
RIGHT?
755
00:28:26,839 --> 00:28:28,707
UM...NO.
756
00:28:28,775 --> 00:28:30,910
YOU'RE LYING.
NO, I'M NOT LYING.
757
00:28:30,977 --> 00:28:33,079
YOU HAVEN'T?
NO.
758
00:28:33,145 --> 00:28:34,113
WHY NOT?
759
00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:35,915
I JUST HAVEN'T.
760
00:28:35,982 --> 00:28:38,484
IT'S JUST NOT THE TIME.
761
00:28:38,550 --> 00:28:40,686
IF IT'S NOT
THE TIME FOR YOU,
762
00:28:40,753 --> 00:28:42,321
MAYBE IT ISN'T TIME
FOR ME, EITHER.
763
00:28:42,388 --> 00:28:44,556
PARIS, YOU CAN'T JUDGE
WHAT'S RIGHT FOR YOU
764
00:28:44,623 --> 00:28:46,058
AGAINST WHAT'S RIGHT
FOR ME.
765
00:28:46,125 --> 00:28:48,294
WE'RE DIFFERENT, AND JAMIE
AND JESS ARE DIFFERENT.
766
00:28:48,360 --> 00:28:49,595
WELL, YEAH.
767
00:28:49,661 --> 00:28:51,998
MAYBE IT WAS THE TIME
FOR YOU TWO.
768
00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:55,067
I GUESS. I WISH I HAD
THE DATA TO BACK IT UP.
769
00:28:55,134 --> 00:28:57,870
SOME THINGS
CAN'T BE ANALYZED.
770
00:28:57,937 --> 00:29:01,473
LISTEN, RORY,
THESE LAST FEW WEEKS,
771
00:29:01,540 --> 00:29:03,976
FRANCIE GOT THINGS
ALL TWISTED AROUND.
772
00:29:04,043 --> 00:29:05,744
YOU LET HER GET THINGS
TWISTED AROUND.
773
00:29:05,812 --> 00:29:10,316
I KNOW. I JUST TEND TO
BELIEVE THE WORST
IN PEOPLE, YOU KNOW?
774
00:29:10,382 --> 00:29:13,052
OH, YEAH. I KNOW.
775
00:29:13,119 --> 00:29:17,156
I'M...
THAT'S OKAY.
776
00:29:17,223 --> 00:29:19,725
HELLO! MOMMY'S HOME!
WE'RE IN HERE!
777
00:29:19,792 --> 00:29:21,327
"WE'RE"? WHO'S "WE'RE"?
OH, HEY, PARIS.
778
00:29:21,393 --> 00:29:23,362
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE
COMING OVER TONIGHT.
779
00:29:23,429 --> 00:29:26,398
IT WASN'T PLANNED.
WELL, I BROUGHT PIZZA.
780
00:29:26,465 --> 00:29:29,535
I HAVE TO TAKE MY RETAINER
OUT FIRST.
781
00:29:29,601 --> 00:29:31,904
I'LL GET THE PLATES.
782
00:29:31,971 --> 00:29:34,006
HEY.
HEY.
783
00:29:34,073 --> 00:29:36,042
I'M TAKING YOU SHOPPING
TOMORROW.
784
00:29:36,108 --> 00:29:37,043
WHY?
785
00:29:37,109 --> 00:29:40,479
IT JUST SEEMS TIME...
FOR NEW SHOES.
786
00:29:40,546 --> 00:29:43,482
OKAY.
OKAY.
787
00:29:43,549 --> 00:29:45,251
[ SIGHS ]
788
00:29:45,317 --> 00:29:47,519
[ Singsong voice ]
I've got the good kid!
789
00:29:49,155 --> 00:29:50,422
...OF 200 YEARS OF TRADITION,
790
00:29:50,489 --> 00:29:53,192
CHILTON BEGINS ITS THIRD CENTURY
OF EDUCATING...
791
00:29:54,793 --> 00:29:56,162
OKAY, I GOT THE COATS HUNG.
792
00:29:56,228 --> 00:29:58,797
I SLIPPED THE GIRL A BUCK
TO GET THE HANGERS
793
00:29:58,865 --> 00:30:00,599
WITH DRY-CLEANING FOAM
STRIPS ATTACHED.
794
00:30:00,666 --> 00:30:03,870
WHY ARE YOU FROWNING?
ARE YOU NERVOUS?
WHAT? NO. I MEAN, YES.
795
00:30:03,936 --> 00:30:06,238
PARIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE HERE,
AND SHE'S NOT.
796
00:30:06,305 --> 00:30:09,241
WELL, MAYBE SHE JUST HAD
A CLOTHING CRISIS.
797
00:30:09,308 --> 00:30:10,409
MAYBE.
798
00:30:10,476 --> 00:30:13,045
DO YOU WANT TO CALL HER?
I DID. NO ANSWER.
799
00:30:13,112 --> 00:30:14,680
I'M SURE SHE'S FINE.
THERE'S TRAFFIC.
800
00:30:14,746 --> 00:30:15,982
JUST RELAX.
OKAY.
801
00:30:16,048 --> 00:30:17,183
THERE YOU ARE.
802
00:30:17,249 --> 00:30:19,018
GRANDPA, YOU CAME.
OF COURSE I CAME.
803
00:30:19,085 --> 00:30:22,288
I WOULDN'T MISS MY GRANDDAUGHTER
TALKING ON NATIONAL TV.
804
00:30:22,354 --> 00:30:24,356
IT'S QUITE A NICE TURNOUT
YOU HAVE HERE.
805
00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:27,559
WE'RE PROUD OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE
NOTHING TO DO ON FRIDAY NIGHT.
806
00:30:27,626 --> 00:30:30,096
YOUR MIND NEVER TIRES
FOR A MOMENT, DOES IT?
807
00:30:30,162 --> 00:30:32,999
IT WILL ONCE PEOPLE
START TALKING.
CHARMING.
808
00:30:33,065 --> 00:30:35,434
I'M GONNA TRACK DOWN SOME COFFEE
'CAUSE THERE'S NO WAY
809
00:30:35,501 --> 00:30:37,269
THEY'RE NOT SERVING COFFEE
AT THIS THING.
810
00:30:37,336 --> 00:30:40,272
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
RELAX. SHE'LL BE HERE.
811
00:30:40,339 --> 00:30:43,342
STANFORD'S BEEN REALLY
FANTASTIC. IT'S --
812
00:30:43,409 --> 00:30:44,911
HI.
HI.
813
00:30:46,012 --> 00:30:48,247
EXCUSE ME FOR A MOMENT.
814
00:30:48,314 --> 00:30:51,083
WE SEEM TO BE RUNNING INTO
EACH OTHER A LOT LATELY.
815
00:30:51,150 --> 00:30:52,351
OH, COME ON, YOU KNOW.
816
00:30:52,418 --> 00:30:55,321
WHERE THERE'S C-SPAN,
THERE'S...ME.
817
00:30:55,387 --> 00:30:57,423
[ CHUCKLES ]
818
00:30:57,489 --> 00:30:58,925
IS RORY AROUND?
819
00:30:58,991 --> 00:31:00,359
SHE'S LOOKING FOR PARIS
AND PANICKING.
820
00:31:00,426 --> 00:31:02,194
SHE'S GONNA HAVE
TO DO THIS ALONE.
821
00:31:02,261 --> 00:31:05,231
PARIS WILL COME.
I TOLD HER THAT.
822
00:31:05,297 --> 00:31:06,865
LISTEN,
DO YOU HAVE A SECOND?
823
00:31:06,933 --> 00:31:08,500
SURE.
824
00:31:08,567 --> 00:31:10,502
I JUST, UM --
825
00:31:10,569 --> 00:31:13,139
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT, UH...
826
00:31:16,608 --> 00:31:20,346
I JUST -- I WANTED TO GET AWAY
FROM THE --
827
00:31:20,412 --> 00:31:21,981
ANYHOW...
828
00:31:22,048 --> 00:31:27,353
JUST HAVEN'T REALLY...
TALKED SINCE --
829
00:31:27,419 --> 00:31:29,055
NO, WE HAVEN'T.
830
00:31:29,121 --> 00:31:31,223
[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
831
00:31:31,290 --> 00:31:33,492
I ALWAYS MEANT TO CALL YOU,
832
00:31:33,559 --> 00:31:36,562
BUT I'M NOT GOOD AT CALLING WHEN
A CALL IS REALLY NECESSARY,
833
00:31:36,628 --> 00:31:40,632
AND THEN, YOU KNOW, UH, IF YOU
DON'T CALL FOR A WHILE,
834
00:31:40,699 --> 00:31:43,269
IT GETS HARDER TO CALL,
AND THEN, AFTER A WHILE,
835
00:31:43,335 --> 00:31:46,105
IT FEELS LIKE IT'S TOO LATE
TO CALL, SO YOU DON'T,
836
00:31:46,172 --> 00:31:47,940
ALTHOUGH YOU ALWAYS KNOW
YOU SHOULD'VE CALLED,
837
00:31:48,007 --> 00:31:49,575
AND I SHOULD'VE CALLED.
IT'S OKAY.
838
00:31:49,641 --> 00:31:51,077
NO, IT'S NOT.
839
00:31:51,143 --> 00:31:53,212
I NEVER REALLY EXPLAINED
WHAT HAPPENED.
840
00:31:53,279 --> 00:31:54,713
YOU DIDN'T MARRY ME.
841
00:31:54,780 --> 00:31:58,384
YES, I KNOW, BUT I NEVER REALLY
EXPLAINED WHY.
842
00:31:58,450 --> 00:31:59,585
I JUST DIDN'T.
843
00:31:59,651 --> 00:32:00,786
YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME.
844
00:32:00,852 --> 00:32:02,421
I DON'T THINK
I DIDN'T LOVE YOU.
845
00:32:02,488 --> 00:32:05,857
I THINK -- I THINK I WAS NOT
READY TO GET MARRIED.
846
00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:07,526
BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME.
847
00:32:07,593 --> 00:32:09,795
NO, I REALLY DON'T THINK
THAT WAS IT.
848
00:32:09,861 --> 00:32:11,330
SOMETIMES THE PERSON YOU LOVE
849
00:32:11,397 --> 00:32:13,966
IS NOT THE PERSON YOU'RE READY
TO LIVE WITH FOREVER.
850
00:32:14,033 --> 00:32:16,535
I'M NOT SAYING IT'S RIGHT --
LORELAI, LISTEN TO ME.
851
00:32:16,602 --> 00:32:18,804
I APPRECIATE THIS,
I REALLY DO,
852
00:32:18,870 --> 00:32:20,806
BUT THERE'S NO NEED FOR IT.
853
00:32:20,872 --> 00:32:22,474
I-I'M REALLY OKAY.
854
00:32:22,541 --> 00:32:25,111
OH, NO. I KNOW YOU'RE --
NO, I'M SURE YOU'RE OKAY.
855
00:32:25,177 --> 00:32:27,946
I'M NOT SAYING THIS BECAUSE
YOU DON'T LOOK OKAY.
856
00:32:28,014 --> 00:32:30,316
YOU LOOK GREAT...
REALLY GREAT.
857
00:32:30,382 --> 00:32:31,750
ALTHOUGH
I'M NOT SAYING THIS
858
00:32:31,817 --> 00:32:34,220
BECAUSE YOU LOOK REALLY GREAT,
ALTHOUGH YOU DO.
859
00:32:34,286 --> 00:32:35,854
DID YOU JOIN A GYM
IN CALIFORNIA?
860
00:32:35,921 --> 00:32:39,925
I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO TEACH
AT A UNIVERSITY LIKE STANFORD.
861
00:32:39,992 --> 00:32:42,028
AND FINALLY THE OPPORTUNITY
CAME UP.
862
00:32:42,094 --> 00:32:44,563
I WENT,
AND IT WAS WONDERFUL.
863
00:32:44,630 --> 00:32:47,833
IF WE'D BEEN GETTING MARRIED,
I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE IT.
864
00:32:47,899 --> 00:32:49,035
YOU'RE WELCOME.
865
00:32:49,101 --> 00:32:51,070
AND BEING AWAY
GAVE ME TIME TO THINK.
866
00:32:51,137 --> 00:32:53,572
I THOUGHT,
AND NOW I'M FINE.
867
00:32:53,639 --> 00:32:56,242
IT'S JUST --
WE NEVER HAD ANY CLOSURE.
868
00:32:56,308 --> 00:32:58,577
LIFE'S NOT REALLY ABOUT CLOSURE,
IS IT?
869
00:32:58,644 --> 00:33:00,212
NO, I GUESS NOT.
870
00:33:01,847 --> 00:33:03,082
SO, YOU'RE OKAY?
871
00:33:03,149 --> 00:33:04,750
I'M OKAY.
I'M OVER IT.
872
00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:05,784
SURE?
873
00:33:05,851 --> 00:33:07,386
I AM COMPLETELY SURE.
874
00:33:07,453 --> 00:33:10,589
WELL, THEN,
BOY, DON'T I FEEL STUPID?
875
00:33:10,656 --> 00:33:13,725
YOU ARE MANY THINGS,
BUT STUPID IS NOT ONE OF THEM.
876
00:33:13,792 --> 00:33:17,329
WELL, I'M REALLY GLAD
I GOT TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
877
00:33:17,396 --> 00:33:18,364
ME TOO.
878
00:33:20,066 --> 00:33:21,567
I BETTER GET BACK.
879
00:33:21,633 --> 00:33:23,001
OKAY.
880
00:33:24,970 --> 00:33:26,205
[ SIGHS ]
881
00:33:26,272 --> 00:33:28,674
RORY, YOU AND PARIS
SHOULD GET READY.
882
00:33:28,740 --> 00:33:29,975
YOU'RE GOING ON NEXT.
883
00:33:30,042 --> 00:33:31,610
RICHARD, I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU WERE COMING.
884
00:33:31,677 --> 00:33:33,545
HOW ARE YOU?
VERY, VERY WELL, HANLIN.
885
00:33:33,612 --> 00:33:36,815
WONDERFUL.
LET ME FIND YOU A SEAT.
I'M ALSO WITH MY DAUGHTER.
886
00:33:36,882 --> 00:33:37,983
TWO SEATS.
887
00:33:38,050 --> 00:33:39,418
RORY, WHERE'S PARIS?
I DON'T KNOW.
888
00:33:39,485 --> 00:33:41,653
I HAVEN'T SEEN HER,
AND I CALLED HER HOUSE.
889
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,889
OH, DEAR. WELL, I HOPE
YOU KNOW BOTH PARTS.
890
00:33:43,955 --> 00:33:47,959
OKAY, GREAT.
YOU ARE GOING TO
BE WONDERFUL, TRUST ME.
891
00:33:48,026 --> 00:33:49,761
NOW, DID ANYONE EVER TELL YOU
892
00:33:49,828 --> 00:33:51,797
TO PICTURE THE AUDIENCE
IN THEIR UNDERWEAR?
893
00:33:51,863 --> 00:33:53,099
YES.
WELL, DON'T DO IT.
894
00:33:53,165 --> 00:33:55,934
I DID IT ONCE AND I HAD
NIGHTMARES FOR A WEEK.
895
00:33:56,001 --> 00:33:57,403
BULGARIANS IN SPEEDOS.
896
00:33:57,469 --> 00:33:58,804
THEY'RE ROUNDING.
IS SHE HERE?
897
00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:01,473
NO.
OH, WELL --
OH, THERE SHE IS.
898
00:34:01,540 --> 00:34:03,175
WHERE?
OH, THANK YOU, GOD.
899
00:34:03,242 --> 00:34:05,711
OKAY. BE GREAT.
WE'LL SEE YOU AFTERWARD.
900
00:34:05,777 --> 00:34:06,745
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
901
00:34:06,812 --> 00:34:09,248
PARIS, YOU OKAY?
902
00:34:09,315 --> 00:34:11,283
AND IT IS
WITH GREAT PLEASURE
903
00:34:11,350 --> 00:34:12,851
THAT I INTRODUCE
TWO YOUNG LADIES
904
00:34:12,918 --> 00:34:16,522
THAT EPITOMIZE THE VERY BEST OF
WHAT CHILTON HAS TO OFFER.
905
00:34:16,588 --> 00:34:17,723
PARIS, ARE YOU OKAY?
906
00:34:17,789 --> 00:34:19,057
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
907
00:34:19,125 --> 00:34:21,427
I GIVE YOU
PARIS GELLER AND RORY GILMORE.
908
00:34:34,973 --> 00:34:36,542
"APPLY YOURSELF.
909
00:34:36,608 --> 00:34:39,178
"GET ALL THE EDUCATION YOU CAN,
BUT THEN DO SOMETHING.
910
00:34:39,245 --> 00:34:41,780
DON'T JUST STAND THERE.
MAKE IT HAPPEN."
911
00:34:41,847 --> 00:34:43,582
LEE IACOCCA.
912
00:34:47,986 --> 00:34:49,355
"EDUCATION'S PURPOSE
913
00:34:49,421 --> 00:34:52,023
IS TO REPLACE AN EMPTY MIND
WITH AN OPEN ONE."
914
00:34:52,090 --> 00:34:53,459
MALCOLM FORBES.
915
00:34:57,062 --> 00:34:58,197
[ SIGHS ]
916
00:34:58,264 --> 00:34:59,665
"EDUCATION
IS AN ADMIRABLE THING,
917
00:34:59,731 --> 00:35:02,301
"BUT IT IS WELL TO REMEMBER
FROM TIME TO TIME
918
00:35:02,368 --> 00:35:04,736
THAT NOTHING THAT IS WORTH
KNOWING CAN BE TAUGHT."
919
00:35:04,803 --> 00:35:05,937
OSCAR WILDE.
920
00:35:06,004 --> 00:35:08,174
THESE ARE ONLY THREE
OF MANY COUNTLESS VIEWS
921
00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:10,008
ON THE EXPANSION
OF THE HUMAN MIND.
922
00:35:10,075 --> 00:35:11,643
I PERSONALLY BELIEVE
IN ALL OF THEM,
923
00:35:11,710 --> 00:35:14,780
AND, FORTUNATELY FOR ME,
SO DOES CHILTON,
924
00:35:14,846 --> 00:35:17,383
AN INSTITUTION NOT JUST
BECAUSE OF AGE AND STANDING,
925
00:35:17,449 --> 00:35:20,319
BUT BECAUSE OF IDEAS,
BECAUSE IT ENCOURAGES IDEAS,
926
00:35:20,386 --> 00:35:21,953
AND IT WILL ACCEPT
NOTHING LESS
927
00:35:22,020 --> 00:35:23,389
THAN EVERYTHING
YOU HAVE TO GIVE.
928
00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:26,225
THIS IS THE PLACE
WHERE OUR LIVES START.
929
00:35:28,527 --> 00:35:31,163
YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY,
930
00:35:31,230 --> 00:35:32,798
ME STANDING HERE
BEFORE YOU RIGHT NOW.
931
00:35:32,864 --> 00:35:35,967
I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT NOTHING ELSE
FOR FOUR YEARS
932
00:35:36,034 --> 00:35:37,503
BUT THIS SCHOOL --
933
00:35:37,569 --> 00:35:41,173
THIS BIG, IMPORTANT SCHOOL
934
00:35:41,240 --> 00:35:44,109
WITH ALL OF ITS HISTORY
AND TRADITION
935
00:35:44,176 --> 00:35:47,045
AND REALLY SUPER TEACHERS.
936
00:35:47,112 --> 00:35:49,348
AND I DEDICATED MYSELF TO IT,
937
00:35:49,415 --> 00:35:51,183
COMPLETELY...
938
00:35:51,250 --> 00:35:52,818
HEART AND SOUL...
939
00:35:52,884 --> 00:35:54,253
BELIEVING IN ITS POWER,
940
00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:56,288
BELIEVING IN ITS ABILITY
941
00:35:56,355 --> 00:35:58,724
TO GET ME
WHERE I NEEDED TO GO --
942
00:35:58,790 --> 00:36:00,792
HARVARD.
943
00:36:00,859 --> 00:36:02,761
I THOUGHT OF NOTHING ELSE.
944
00:36:02,828 --> 00:36:05,897
MANY OF YOU OUT THERE
CAN ATTEST TO THAT FACT.
945
00:36:05,964 --> 00:36:10,001
I WAS ON MY WAY,
AND NOTHING COULD STOP ME.
946
00:36:10,068 --> 00:36:12,271
AND HERE'S
THE REALLY FUNNY THING.
947
00:36:12,338 --> 00:36:14,740
AFTER FOUR YEARS
OF SLAVING AWAY,
948
00:36:14,806 --> 00:36:18,410
I GO HOME TODAY,
AND I FOUND THIS.
949
00:36:21,079 --> 00:36:22,481
I'M NOT GOING TO HARVARD!
950
00:36:22,548 --> 00:36:26,117
I GOT THE TINY ENVELOPE,
THE ONE THAT READS,
951
00:36:26,184 --> 00:36:29,154
"SORRY, PARIS,
WE'RE NOT INTERESTED.
952
00:36:29,221 --> 00:36:32,658
TRY AGAIN NEXT YEAR.
LOVE, HARVARD."
953
00:36:32,724 --> 00:36:34,926
AND THE THING
THAT'S REALLY FUNNY HERE IS
954
00:36:34,993 --> 00:36:38,230
WHO IN THE WORLD DESERVES
TO GO TO HARVARD
955
00:36:38,297 --> 00:36:39,698
MORE THAN ME?
956
00:36:39,765 --> 00:36:41,533
HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HARD
I'VE WORKED
957
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:42,768
OVER THESE PAST FOUR YEARS?
958
00:36:42,834 --> 00:36:45,504
I MEAN,
CAN ANYONE HERE BELIEVE
959
00:36:45,571 --> 00:36:47,273
THAT I'M NOT GOING
TO HARVARD?
960
00:36:47,339 --> 00:36:48,807
I CAN'T.
961
00:36:48,874 --> 00:36:51,877
I'M NOT GOING TO HARVARD.
I AM NOT GOING TO HARVARD.
962
00:36:51,943 --> 00:36:54,513
I HAD SEX,
BUT I'M NOT GOING TO HARVARD!
963
00:36:54,580 --> 00:36:55,681
OKAY --
964
00:36:55,747 --> 00:36:57,916
IF YOU ASKED ME WHICH OF THOSE
TWO EVENTS
965
00:36:57,983 --> 00:37:00,118
WOULD BE THE LEAST
LIKELY TO HAPPEN,
966
00:37:00,185 --> 00:37:01,920
IT WOULDN'T BE
NOT GOING TO HARVARD!
967
00:37:01,987 --> 00:37:04,122
THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT.
I'M BEING PUNISHED.
968
00:37:04,189 --> 00:37:07,559
I HAD SEX, SO NOW I DON'T GET
TO GO TO HARVARD.
969
00:37:07,626 --> 00:37:10,396
SHE'S NEVER HAD SEX.
SHE'LL PROBABLY GO TO HARVARD.
970
00:37:10,462 --> 00:37:12,163
PACK YOUR CHASTITY BELT,
GILMORE!
971
00:37:12,230 --> 00:37:14,366
YOU'RE GOING TO HARVARD!
COME ON!
972
00:37:18,604 --> 00:37:21,072
[ Sobbing ] HOW COULD I HAVE
NOT GOTTEN INTO HARVARD?
973
00:37:21,139 --> 00:37:24,042
FIVE GENERATIONS OF GELLERS
HAVE GOTTEN INTO HARVARD.
974
00:37:24,109 --> 00:37:26,678
EVEN IF I WAS THE BILLY CARTER
OF THE FAMILY,
975
00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:29,114
THE NAME IS STILL SUPPOSED
TO CARRY SOME WEIGHT.
PARIS.
976
00:37:29,180 --> 00:37:32,584
THEY HAD TO REALLY NOT LIKE ME
FOR ME NOT TO GET IN.
977
00:37:32,651 --> 00:37:34,420
IT'S LIKE THEY KNOW ME
OR SOMETHING.
978
00:37:34,486 --> 00:37:38,790
STOP. I KNOW HOW MUCH
THIS MEANT TO YOU, PARIS,
979
00:37:38,857 --> 00:37:41,627
BUT YOU ARE GOING TO GET
JUST AS GOOD AN EDUCATION
980
00:37:41,693 --> 00:37:43,462
AT ONE OF THE OTHER
GREAT SCHOOLS
981
00:37:43,529 --> 00:37:46,932
YOU'RE DESTINED TO GET INTO.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
982
00:37:46,998 --> 00:37:50,201
MAYBE IT'S A GOOD THING
THAT YOU'RE GOING
TO A DIFFERENT SCHOOL
983
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:51,637
THAN THE REST
OF YOUR FAMILY.
984
00:37:51,703 --> 00:37:53,171
YOU'LL BE DOING
YOUR OWN THING,
985
00:37:53,238 --> 00:37:55,674
STARTING YOUR OWN TRADITION.
DOESN'T THAT SOUND EXCITING?
986
00:37:55,741 --> 00:37:58,444
I CAN'T BELIEVE I SLEPT
WITH JAMIE.
987
00:37:58,510 --> 00:37:59,678
I'M A SLUT.
988
00:37:59,745 --> 00:38:01,046
NO, YOU'RE NOT.
989
00:38:01,112 --> 00:38:02,414
YOU LOVE HIM.
990
00:38:02,481 --> 00:38:04,750
WHAT IF HE DOESN'T LOVE ME
ANYMORE?
991
00:38:04,816 --> 00:38:07,853
WHAT IF HE DOESN'T THINK
I'M SPECIAL ANYMORE?
992
00:38:07,919 --> 00:38:11,122
HOW AM I GOING TO TELL HIM
I DIDN'T GET INTO HARVARD?
993
00:38:11,189 --> 00:38:14,125
WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
994
00:38:14,192 --> 00:38:16,762
PARIS, I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU
DIDN'T GET INTO HARVARD,
995
00:38:16,828 --> 00:38:19,698
BUT YOU ARE SO SMART
AND SO SPECIAL,
996
00:38:19,765 --> 00:38:22,501
AND YOU'LL SEE,
EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE FINE.
997
00:38:24,202 --> 00:38:27,873
HEY. I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE
EVERYTHING WAS OKAY.
998
00:38:27,939 --> 00:38:30,642
YEAH. WE'VE GOT EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL. THANKS.
999
00:38:30,709 --> 00:38:34,079
OKAY. I'LL BE OUTSIDE WHEN
YOU'RE READY. NO RUSH.
1000
00:38:34,145 --> 00:38:35,313
THANKS.
1001
00:38:36,181 --> 00:38:39,951
WELL, ALL I'VE GOT TO SAY IS
1002
00:38:40,018 --> 00:38:43,154
AFTER ALL THE TROUBLE
THIS SEX THING HAS CAUSED ME,
1003
00:38:43,221 --> 00:38:45,624
I HAD BETTER HAVE BEEN GOOD.
1004
00:38:47,493 --> 00:38:50,396
THAT'S THE PERSPECTIVE
I KNOW AND LOVE.
1005
00:38:52,564 --> 00:38:54,933
DAD, I'M SORRY. I WAS
JUST CHECKING ON THE GIRLS.
1006
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:56,968
I HOPE THEY'RE FEELING
GOOD ABOUT THEMSELVES.
1007
00:38:57,035 --> 00:38:58,269
THEY DID A WONDERFUL JOB.
1008
00:38:58,336 --> 00:39:01,306
I'M SURE THEY'LL BE VERY PLEASED
TO HEAR YOU THINK SO.
1009
00:39:01,373 --> 00:39:02,941
LISTEN, UM,
I NEED TO GET HOME.
1010
00:39:03,008 --> 00:39:05,477
I'M EXPECTING A VERY IMPORTANT
CALL FROM CHINA
1011
00:39:05,544 --> 00:39:06,945
THAT, UNFORTUNATELY,
I CANNOT MISS.
1012
00:39:07,012 --> 00:39:09,381
THAT'S FINE, DAD.
I'LL TELL RORY YOU HAD TO GO.
1013
00:39:09,448 --> 00:39:12,651
ALRIGHT. AND TELL HER I'LL CALL
HER LATER, AND GIVE HER THIS.
1014
00:39:12,718 --> 00:39:15,754
OH, THAT'S VERY NICE.
NOW, HOW ABOUT MY FINDER'S FEE?
1015
00:39:15,821 --> 00:39:17,989
YOU'RE VERY AMUSING.
THANK YOU FOR A LOVELY EVENING.
1016
00:39:18,056 --> 00:39:20,426
AND I'LL SEE THE TWO OF YOU
ON FRIDAY.
1017
00:39:20,492 --> 00:39:23,695
GOODNIGHT. SLEEP TIGHT.
1018
00:39:23,762 --> 00:39:26,331
EXCUSE ME. HI.
I AM NOT SEEING MY COAT HERE,
1019
00:39:26,398 --> 00:39:28,567
IT WAS VERY CUTE,
AND IT WAS ON SALE,
1020
00:39:28,634 --> 00:39:31,002
I'LL FLING MYSELF OFF
A BUILDING IF I LOSE IT.
1021
00:39:31,069 --> 00:39:33,839
WE PUT SOME OF THE COAT RACKS
IN THE CLASSROOM THERE.
1022
00:39:33,905 --> 00:39:36,475
ELSE THE STAIRCASE
TO THE ROOF IS ON YOUR RIGHT.
1023
00:39:36,542 --> 00:39:38,243
THANK YOU.
1024
00:39:38,309 --> 00:39:39,277
[ CHUCKLES ]
1025
00:39:39,344 --> 00:39:40,612
TOOK 200 YEARS,
1026
00:39:40,679 --> 00:39:42,848
BUT SOMEBODY AT CHILTON
FINALLY CRACKED A JOKE.
1027
00:39:48,687 --> 00:39:51,289
OKAY.
OH.
1028
00:39:51,356 --> 00:39:54,926
SO, THIS IS WHERE THEY KEEP
THE COATS THEY'RE ASHAMED OF.
1029
00:39:54,993 --> 00:39:58,497
THIS SCHOOL HAS TAKEN SNOBBERY
TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL.
1030
00:39:58,564 --> 00:40:00,365
SO, IS RORY OKAY?
OH, YEAH.
1031
00:40:00,432 --> 00:40:03,802
SHE'S TAKING CARE OF PARIS,
BUT SHE'S GOOD, THANKS.
1032
00:40:03,869 --> 00:40:06,638
I MUST SAY, I'VE BEEN A TEACHER
FOR 10 YEARS NOW,
1033
00:40:06,705 --> 00:40:08,106
AND IT WASN'T UNTIL TODAY
1034
00:40:08,173 --> 00:40:10,942
I REALIZED IT MUST BE
REALLY HARD TO BE A GIRL.
1035
00:40:11,009 --> 00:40:12,578
AND WITH THE INVENTION
OF SEPHORA,
1036
00:40:12,644 --> 00:40:13,679
REALLY EXPENSIVE, TOO.
1037
00:40:13,745 --> 00:40:15,313
I'M VERY SORRY.
OH, DON'T BE.
1038
00:40:15,380 --> 00:40:17,949
AT LEAST WE GET TO WEAR SKIRTS
WITHOUT BEING SCOTTISH
1039
00:40:18,016 --> 00:40:20,318
OR RIDING A FLOAT
IN THE GAY-PRIDE PARADE.
1040
00:40:20,385 --> 00:40:21,753
THAT'LL CHANGE SOMEDAY,
MY FRIEND,
1041
00:40:21,820 --> 00:40:24,389
AND WHEN IT DOES,
I STILL WON'T WEAR A SKIRT,
1042
00:40:24,456 --> 00:40:26,057
BUT I'LL APPLAUD
THOSE THAT DO,
1043
00:40:26,124 --> 00:40:29,127
AND THEN CROSS THE STREET
SO NOBODY SEES I'M WITH THEM.
1044
00:40:29,194 --> 00:40:31,763
IT WAS NICE SEEING YOU.
NICE TO SEE YOU, TOO.
1045
00:40:31,830 --> 00:40:34,600
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.
I WILL.
1046
00:40:43,609 --> 00:40:47,112
AND APPARENTLY I'M...
1047
00:40:47,178 --> 00:40:49,014
NOT OVER IT.
1048
00:40:59,791 --> 00:41:01,760
I'M NOT GETTING RID OF MY
KNIVES, JACKSON.
1049
00:41:01,827 --> 00:41:03,929
I'M A CHEF.
I HAVE TO HAVE KNIVES.
1050
00:41:03,995 --> 00:41:06,364
SOOKIE.
AND I'M ALSO NOT CUTTING OFF
THE WATER SUPPLY,
1051
00:41:06,431 --> 00:41:09,801
AND I'M NOT SANDING DOWN ALL
THE EDGES OF MY FURNITURE.
1052
00:41:09,868 --> 00:41:12,437
NOW, I'M SORRY THAT YOU THINK
THIS HOUSE IS A DEATHTRAP.
1053
00:41:12,504 --> 00:41:15,073
I'M SORRY THAT YOU THINK THERE'S
NOTHING IN OUR LIFESTYLES
1054
00:41:15,140 --> 00:41:16,908
THAT IS CONDUCIVE
TO HAVING A BABY,
1055
00:41:16,975 --> 00:41:19,545
BUT OUR KID IS GONNA HAVE TO BE
BRIGHT ENOUGH
1056
00:41:19,611 --> 00:41:20,979
NOT TO DISCONNECT
THE WATER HOSE
1057
00:41:21,046 --> 00:41:22,814
THAT GOES TO THE AUTOMATIC
ICE MAKER
1058
00:41:22,881 --> 00:41:25,450
AND SHOVE IT UP
HIS OR HER NOSE.
1059
00:41:25,517 --> 00:41:27,953
NOW GO TO SLEEP.
1060
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:38,163
DID I TELL YOU
HOW HAPPY I AM?
1061
00:41:39,130 --> 00:41:41,667
NO, YOU DIDN'T.
1062
00:41:46,872 --> 00:41:48,039
I HAVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER
1063
00:41:48,106 --> 00:41:50,441
ABOUT ANYTHING
IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.
1064
00:41:50,508 --> 00:41:51,577
REALLY?
1065
00:41:51,643 --> 00:41:52,944
OUR WEDDING DAY,
1066
00:41:53,011 --> 00:41:55,446
BUT THIS IS RUNNING
A REALLY CLOSE SECOND.
1067
00:41:55,513 --> 00:41:57,649
JACKSON.
1068
00:42:01,119 --> 00:42:03,689
NOW, IF YOU WOULD JUST GET RID
OF THE KNIVES,
1069
00:42:03,755 --> 00:42:06,692
I THINK IT COULD MAKE IT
A TIE.
1070
00:42:06,758 --> 00:42:09,327
I WASN'T KIDDING
ABOUT THE KNIVES.
1071
00:42:09,394 --> 00:42:10,896
GOODNIGHT, JACKSON.
1072
00:42:12,564 --> 00:42:14,332
IF I COULD READ YOU
THE STATISTICS
1073
00:42:14,399 --> 00:42:16,067
JUST ONE MORE TIME --
1074
00:42:16,134 --> 00:42:17,703
I LOVE YOU, JACKSON.
1075
00:42:17,769 --> 00:42:18,970
HOLD ON. I'LL FIND THEM.
1076
00:42:19,037 --> 00:42:21,439
BUT --
I DON'T KNOW.
1077
00:42:21,506 --> 00:42:23,809
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
I DON'T KNOW.
1078
00:42:23,875 --> 00:42:26,377
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?
I DON'T KNOW.
1079
00:42:26,444 --> 00:42:28,146
WHAT ABOUT ALEX?
1080
00:42:28,213 --> 00:42:29,214
I DON'T KNOW.
1081
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:30,782
BUT IS MAX GOING --
1082
00:42:30,849 --> 00:42:33,952
THERE'S NOT GONNA BE A WEALTH
OF INFORMATION TONIGHT.
1083
00:42:34,019 --> 00:42:35,153
SORRY.
1084
00:42:36,354 --> 00:42:37,823
IT'S JUST SO...
1085
00:42:40,692 --> 00:42:41,860
[ SIGHS ]
1086
00:42:50,035 --> 00:42:51,870
THE BIG ONE.
1087
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,808
LOOKS LIKE PARIS WAS RIGHT.
1088
00:42:59,945 --> 00:43:04,082
APPARENTLY YOU'RE THE BIGGEST
VIRGIN IN THE WORLD.
1089
00:43:07,518 --> 00:43:09,420
WOW.
1090
00:43:09,487 --> 00:43:10,455
SO?
1091
00:43:10,521 --> 00:43:12,991
WHAT?
I DON'T KNOW.
1092
00:43:13,058 --> 00:43:15,393
WELL,
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
I DON'T KNOW.
1093
00:43:15,460 --> 00:43:18,329
WHICH ONE
ARE YOU GONNA CHOOSE?
I DON'T KNOW.
1094
00:43:18,396 --> 00:43:19,798
I GUESS WE BETTER GO INSIDE.
1095
00:43:19,865 --> 00:43:22,634
WE BOTH HAVE A LOT OF THINGS
TO FIGURE OUT, HUH?
1096
00:43:22,701 --> 00:43:25,603
YEP.
YEP.
1097
00:43:25,671 --> 00:43:28,239
SO WHAT ARE THE ODDS
PARIS'S EVER GONNA HAVE SEX
1098
00:43:28,306 --> 00:43:29,274
AGAIN IN THIS LIFETIME?
1099
00:43:29,340 --> 00:43:31,042
I DON'T KNOW.
82536
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