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♪ come and knock on our door ♪
2
00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:15,058
♪ come and knock on our door ♪
3
00:00:15,082 --> 00:00:16,560
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
4
00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,095
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
5
00:00:18,119 --> 00:00:21,264
♪ where the kisses are
Hers and hers and his ♪
6
00:00:21,288 --> 00:00:22,921
♪ three's company too ♪
7
00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:25,768
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
8
00:00:25,792 --> 00:00:27,370
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
9
00:00:27,394 --> 00:00:28,871
♪ take a step that is new ♪
10
00:00:28,895 --> 00:00:30,407
♪ take a step that is new ♪
11
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:33,376
♪ we've a loveable space
That needs your face ♪
12
00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:34,900
♪ three's company too ♪
13
00:00:42,576 --> 00:00:44,087
♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
14
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,655
♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
15
00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,412
♪ three is company too ♪
16
00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:56,332
♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
17
00:00:56,356 --> 00:00:57,834
♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
18
00:00:57,858 --> 00:00:59,891
♪ three is company too. ♪
19
00:01:05,165 --> 00:01:07,310
- janet?
- hmm?
20
00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:08,812
Do you like it?
21
00:01:08,836 --> 00:01:10,268
Jack.
22
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:14,250
Oh, jack, it's beautiful.
23
00:01:14,274 --> 00:01:17,220
Well, how sweet. But
What's the occasion?
24
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:19,444
My mother's birthday.
25
00:01:20,981 --> 00:01:22,959
Oh, it's very nice.
26
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:24,461
- oh, thank you.
- mm-hmm.
27
00:01:24,485 --> 00:01:27,230
Thank you, thank you. I'm
Gonna give it to her tomorrow.
28
00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:28,899
What, you're gonna
Go down to san diego?
29
00:01:28,923 --> 00:01:31,501
Yeah, if I can borrow larry's
Car. You wanna come with me?
30
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:34,304
Oh, jack, I would love to, but
Who's gonna watch the shop?
31
00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:36,706
- I'm supposed to work.
- oh, that's too bad.
32
00:01:36,730 --> 00:01:40,410
My mom thinks the only girls I
Know are empty-headed playmates.
33
00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:44,013
- what made her think that?
- when she met 'em.
34
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:46,983
Anyway, she's always on my case
35
00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:50,319
To forget the looks
And find a girl with brains.
36
00:01:50,343 --> 00:01:51,776
You sure you can't make it?
37
00:01:55,549 --> 00:01:59,229
You are skating
On thin ice, jack.
38
00:01:59,253 --> 00:02:03,100
Jack, janet! You'll never
Guess who I ran into today!
39
00:02:03,124 --> 00:02:05,435
Chrissy, you left the door open.
40
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,504
Oh, that's okay. My friend
Darlene is paying the taxicab driver.
41
00:02:08,528 --> 00:02:10,640
You'll never guess
It in a million years!
42
00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:12,275
Your friend darlene?
43
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:13,898
How'd you guess?
44
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,948
Who's darlene?
45
00:02:17,972 --> 00:02:19,615
You remember. I told
You all about her.
46
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:22,018
- I went to high school
With her in fresno.
- you did?
47
00:02:22,042 --> 00:02:24,020
Yeah, remember that
Girl I told you about
48
00:02:24,044 --> 00:02:26,689
Who was always so miserable 'cause
She never thought she'd get anywhere?
49
00:02:26,713 --> 00:02:29,559
- that was darlene?
- no, that was me.
50
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:33,496
Darlene is the one who told me I
Had as much brains as anybody else,
51
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,498
And I'd better use
Them or lose them.
52
00:02:35,522 --> 00:02:37,656
So what'd you do?
53
00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:43,573
- jack: excuse me.
- I listened to her.
54
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:47,344
Darlene was always so smart, all the
Kids in school used to call her einstein.
55
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:49,345
Oh, that's wonderful.
56
00:02:49,369 --> 00:02:50,847
- janet: jack.
- yeah.
57
00:02:50,871 --> 00:02:52,849
She was captain of
The debating team
58
00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:56,820
And president of the honors
Society and our class valedictorian.
59
00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:59,089
Gosh, chrissy,
What'd she do for fun?
60
00:02:59,113 --> 00:03:01,624
She sang in the church choir.
61
00:03:01,648 --> 00:03:03,126
She sang in the church choir.
62
00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:05,128
Well, I can't wait
To meet this one.
63
00:03:05,152 --> 00:03:07,297
Well, you're gonna
Meet her real soon
64
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:08,965
Because she's gonna
Be staying with us.
65
00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:10,100
What?
66
00:03:10,124 --> 00:03:12,435
She was supposed to be
In town for a convention,
67
00:03:12,459 --> 00:03:14,837
But the hotel lost
Her reservation.
68
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,206
So you invited miss
Einstein to stay here.
69
00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:19,208
Well, it's only for a few days.
70
00:03:19,232 --> 00:03:22,012
Chrissy, it's crowded enough
With just the three of us.
71
00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:23,513
I didn't think you'd mind.
72
00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,348
Janet: really, jack,
It's no big deal.
73
00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:27,150
She could sleep
Here on the sofa.
74
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:28,551
Chrissy: yeah.
75
00:03:28,575 --> 00:03:30,853
The sofa? I won't hear of it.
76
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,855
Chrissy's friend
Can stay in my room.
77
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,225
Oh, hello. Who's that?
78
00:03:35,249 --> 00:03:38,061
Come here, I want
You to meet my friends.
79
00:03:38,085 --> 00:03:39,896
- this is janet
And this is jack.
- janet: hello.
80
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,965
- how do you do?
- chrissy, chrissy, chrissy.
81
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:44,389
How come you never
Told us about darlene?
82
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:48,104
Don't listen to him.
83
00:03:48,128 --> 00:03:51,141
Chrissy talks about you all the time,
Especially about how you helped her.
84
00:03:51,165 --> 00:03:53,743
- has she told you
How she helped me?
- no.
85
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:56,379
If it wasn't for chrissy, I never
Would've graduated with honors.
86
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:57,768
As a matter of fact,
I probably never
87
00:03:57,792 --> 00:03:59,482
Would've cracked a book
My whole senior year.
88
00:03:59,506 --> 00:04:02,085
Really? What did she do?
89
00:04:02,109 --> 00:04:03,909
She stole all my boyfriends.
90
00:04:11,252 --> 00:04:13,230
Could I have my hand back?
91
00:04:13,254 --> 00:04:15,298
I'm sorry, I'm getting
So forgetful.
92
00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:16,633
Excuse me.
93
00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:18,835
- I warned you about jack.
- oh, come on, chrissy.
94
00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:21,438
That's not very nice. Didn't I
Offer to let darlene use my room?
95
00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:24,941
Oh, no, I couldn't ask you to do
That, jack. Where would you sleep?
96
00:04:24,965 --> 00:04:27,476
Well, actually, it's a rather
Large room, so I thought...
97
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:29,145
Jack.
98
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:32,281
I thought that I would sleep on
Our friend mr. Sofa right here.
99
00:04:32,305 --> 00:04:33,616
Right there.
100
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,785
Excuse me, why don't I
Go straighten up my room.
101
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:37,742
I mean, your room. Excuse me.
102
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,759
See what I mean?
103
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,861
Yes, but you don't
Have to worry,
104
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,863
He's really quite harmless.
105
00:04:46,887 --> 00:04:50,166
Yeah, and he's funny. You should
See some of the tricks he pulls on us.
106
00:04:50,190 --> 00:04:52,435
Yeah.
107
00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:54,771
On second thought, you'd
Better keep your door locked.
108
00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:57,128
- I'll keep that in mind.
- janet: mm-hmm.
109
00:04:59,033 --> 00:05:02,011
- isn't she terrific?
- oh, chrissy, you're
The one who's terrific.
110
00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:03,780
- why?
- well, I'll tell you.
111
00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:07,150
If I ran into an old high-school
Friend and she was dressed like that...
112
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:10,787
You know, a gucci bag,
Romano boots, the dior blouse...
113
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:13,890
I would be green with envy, and
You're not the slightest bit jealous.
114
00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:16,748
Why, that's silly? Why
Would I be jealous?
115
00:05:17,885 --> 00:05:20,125
Is that really a gucci bag?
116
00:05:24,258 --> 00:05:26,068
Oh, now, you remember, darlene,
117
00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:28,971
If there's anything you want, you
Come out here and just wake me up.
118
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,973
And I'm talking anything at all.
119
00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:33,476
Jack, you are very kind.
120
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,811
Kind of nauseating.
121
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:38,347
Is, um... Is there a telephone
Here that I could use?
122
00:05:38,371 --> 00:05:40,016
Yeah, it's right over here.
123
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,686
Oh, uh, is that the only phone?
124
00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:44,870
How many do you need?
125
00:05:45,912 --> 00:05:47,223
No, see,
126
00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:49,726
I think darlene means
She'd like a little privacy.
127
00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:51,828
- let's go heat up
Some coffee.
- oh, okay.
128
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,863
Darlene, I will get
The number for you.
129
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:56,366
I don't want you to bruise
Your pretty little fingers.
130
00:05:56,390 --> 00:05:58,568
Oh. Jack?
131
00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:00,236
It's personal.
132
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:01,904
Oh, I'm sorry. Here you go.
133
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:03,740
Whoops, hang on. Low bridge.
134
00:06:03,764 --> 00:06:05,875
- whoop, oh.
- got it?
135
00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:07,377
Yeah, thanks.
136
00:06:07,401 --> 00:06:09,979
I'll just, uh, put
Your suitcase in my...
137
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,269
Sorry.
138
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,954
Hello, doris. Hi, it's darlene.
139
00:06:17,978 --> 00:06:20,790
I can be reached at 555-6350.
140
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:23,326
Are there any calls?
141
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:24,928
Who?
142
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:26,629
Fred jones.
143
00:06:26,653 --> 00:06:29,187
How come all the johns
Are always named "Jones"?
144
00:06:30,324 --> 00:06:32,201
Yeah.
145
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,203
How much?
146
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,205
Are you kidding? Listen, doris.
147
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:39,042
You tell him that if he
Wants me, my price is $100.
148
00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:40,877
You got it? Great.
149
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:43,221
I'll talk to you later.
150
00:06:43,937 --> 00:06:45,871
- are you free?
- what?
151
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:52,588
I just, uh... Just thought you might
Like to go down to the regal beagle.
152
00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:55,024
- the regal...
- it's our pub.
153
00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:57,293
Now? I just got here.
154
00:06:57,317 --> 00:07:00,897
Hey, you know, the best cure
For jet lag is a little glass of vino.
155
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,566
Well, I don't know, jack. I haven't
Had a chance to talk to chrissy...
156
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:05,635
Oh, you guys will have
Plenty of time together.
157
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:08,437
We'll be back in ten, twenty
Minutes. What do you say?
158
00:07:08,461 --> 00:07:10,807
- well, I...
- good.
159
00:07:10,831 --> 00:07:14,077
Hey, hey. Where you going?
160
00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:16,880
Uh, darlene wanted
To see the regal beagle.
161
00:07:16,904 --> 00:07:20,638
- well, what about us?
- you've seen it lots of times.
162
00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:26,289
So then,
163
00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:28,791
Janet and chrissy asked
Me to move in with them.
164
00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:31,460
And except for a
Few minor irritations,
165
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:33,462
Everything's worked
Out perfectly.
166
00:07:33,486 --> 00:07:35,030
Oh.
167
00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:38,334
And there's, um, nothing
Going on between you?
168
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:40,291
No, that's one
Of the irritations.
169
00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:49,245
Say, darlene, how would you like to
Drive down to san diego with me tomorrow?
170
00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:50,746
- san diego?
- yeah.
171
00:07:50,770 --> 00:07:52,748
It's my mother's birthday,
And I was wondering...
172
00:07:52,772 --> 00:07:57,587
We-he-he-he-ell...
- hello there.
- larry.
173
00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,422
Hi, I'm larry,
174
00:07:59,446 --> 00:08:02,024
Jack's best friend,
His buddy and his pal.
175
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:04,027
- larry, get lost.
- see what I mean?
176
00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:06,029
Darlene, this is
No friend of mine.
177
00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:07,697
Don't listen to him, darling.
178
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:09,566
That's darlene.
179
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:12,035
Darlene? What a lovely name.
180
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:14,237
Whatever do you do, darlene?
181
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:16,205
Don't you think that's
A touch personal?
182
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:18,408
You're right. I'll
Wait until we're alone.
183
00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:20,109
Hey, larry, knock it off.
184
00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:22,678
Bartender just told
Me this terrific joke.
185
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:25,548
Seems this traveling salesman
Stopped by this farmhouse...
186
00:08:25,572 --> 00:08:28,751
Larry, I don't think darlene
Wants to hear any off-color jokes.
187
00:08:28,775 --> 00:08:31,820
Gotcha. Seems this traveling
Minister stopped by this farmhouse...
188
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,822
Larry, will you knock it off?
189
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:37,293
It's all right, jack. I have to be going
Anyway. I'm expecting a phone call.
190
00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:40,829
And not a moment too soon.
Listen, darlene, I'll walk you back.
191
00:08:40,853 --> 00:08:43,499
Oh, no, jack, stay. I can
Find my way back, really.
192
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:46,802
Okay, um, what about
San diego tomorrow?
193
00:08:46,826 --> 00:08:49,305
Oh, um, I'm going to
Have to let you know.
194
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:50,806
- okay.
- goodbye, larry.
195
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:52,642
No, not goodbye.
196
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:55,065
Until we meet
Again, without jack.
197
00:08:56,636 --> 00:08:58,570
Ah!
198
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,118
- serves you right.
- san diego, huh?
199
00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:05,187
- you sure do
Move fast, pal.
- larry...
200
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:08,457
Hey, look, I know this nice, quiet
Rendezvous just outside the city...
201
00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:11,694
Will you cool it? She's
Not that kind of girl.
202
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,228
Oh.
203
00:09:13,252 --> 00:09:16,366
As a matter of fact, she
Used to sing in a church choir.
204
00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:18,768
That's no problem, jack. This
Place is way out on the beach.
205
00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:20,725
No one will hear her.
206
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:28,678
Yeah, and all through high
School darlene helped me
207
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:31,948
With my english and my
History and my algebra.
208
00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:33,682
Well, how nice.
209
00:09:33,706 --> 00:09:36,485
Yeah, well, I helped her with
The really important things.
210
00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:37,687
Yeah, like what?
211
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:39,910
I taught her how to say no.
212
00:09:49,523 --> 00:09:50,922
Chrissy!
213
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:54,292
Chrissy?
214
00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:57,161
Hello?
215
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,197
Fred jones?
216
00:10:01,501 --> 00:10:02,811
Huh?
217
00:10:02,835 --> 00:10:06,081
What do you mean,
What do you get for $100?
218
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:10,152
Hey, is this one of those
Game-show quizzes?
219
00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:12,221
Yeah. Huh?
220
00:10:12,245 --> 00:10:14,512
Well, what do you
Expect for $100?
221
00:10:16,016 --> 00:10:17,281
What?
222
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,963
Hey!
223
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:22,231
Hey!
224
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:23,800
Hey!
225
00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:25,802
Listen, fred, you're a creep!
226
00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:28,760
- I think that's for me.
- no, um...
227
00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,842
Hello, fred?
228
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:34,977
Uh, yes, this is darlene.
229
00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:37,235
No, no, that was a new girl.
230
00:10:40,206 --> 00:10:42,284
Fred, fred,
231
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,286
Give me the number
Of your hotel room
232
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:47,089
And I'll meet you
There after the party.
233
00:10:47,113 --> 00:10:49,446
Fine, I'll see you then. Bye.
234
00:10:55,555 --> 00:11:02,872
You're a... A...
Uh... Call girl.
235
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,161
Oh.
236
00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:16,007
Well, well.
237
00:11:16,943 --> 00:11:18,208
Well.
238
00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:22,024
Well, well, imagine that.
239
00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:24,627
Janet, I didn't mean
To shake you up.
240
00:11:24,651 --> 00:11:26,028
Who, me?
241
00:11:26,052 --> 00:11:28,898
Why would you shake me
Up? It's none of my business.
242
00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:31,134
Then you're not
Gonna tell chrissy?
243
00:11:31,158 --> 00:11:33,269
Who, me? Tell chr...
244
00:11:33,293 --> 00:11:36,305
Tell chrissy that someone
She's been bragging about,
245
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:40,075
That she really
Likes, is a... Uh... Oh.
246
00:11:40,099 --> 00:11:43,413
What's the matter?
Can't you even say it?
247
00:11:43,437 --> 00:11:46,749
Not to chrissy. I don't
Think she could handle it.
248
00:11:46,773 --> 00:11:49,151
Hmm. But you can.
249
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:52,121
Oh, sure. Definitely.
250
00:11:52,145 --> 00:11:54,556
I mean, you know,
I feel that, well,
251
00:11:54,580 --> 00:11:56,592
You're old enough to
Know what you're doing,
252
00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:58,894
So I'm not gonna make
Any moral judgments.
253
00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:00,529
Thank you.
254
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:03,273
If you want to throw your life
Down the gutter, that's your business.
255
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:08,004
It's just, I don't understand
256
00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:11,674
How you could sell
Yourself to just any guy.
257
00:12:11,698 --> 00:12:13,809
- any guy?
- yeah.
258
00:12:13,833 --> 00:12:17,113
What do you think
I am, a hooker?
259
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:21,551
Hooker, call girl,
What's the difference?
260
00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:24,687
Hookers don't drive ferraris.
261
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:26,144
Oh.
262
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:28,780
Oh.
263
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:32,061
Oh.
264
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:35,197
You know, though, chrissy
Said that you were real bright.
265
00:12:35,221 --> 00:12:37,833
- everybody called you einstein.
- that's right.
266
00:12:37,857 --> 00:12:40,369
Well, couldn't you
Have found a better job?
267
00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,805
I mean, a girl
With your brains...
268
00:12:42,829 --> 00:12:46,675
Is smart enough to know
Where the real money is.
269
00:12:46,699 --> 00:12:48,444
I'd like to chat
With you longer,
270
00:12:48,468 --> 00:12:50,513
But I really have to
Get ready for work.
271
00:12:50,537 --> 00:12:52,681
So soon? I was
Hoping we could talk.
272
00:12:52,705 --> 00:12:54,706
I want to hear
All about your job.
273
00:12:56,209 --> 00:12:58,375
Why don't you ask janet?
274
00:13:05,385 --> 00:13:07,230
- well?
- well!
275
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:08,453
Um...
276
00:13:11,891 --> 00:13:14,537
We're out of coffee. I'm going
Down to furley's to get some.
277
00:13:14,561 --> 00:13:16,539
- can't you tell me first?
- no.
278
00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:19,942
- why?
- uh, because, uh, chrissy,
There's not much to tell.
279
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:22,478
Because it's not
Really much of a job.
280
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:25,281
But what about all those
Guccis and poochies?
281
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,550
Well, yes, yes.
282
00:13:27,574 --> 00:13:30,152
Uh, she does make
A lot of money.
283
00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:32,988
- how?
- how?
284
00:13:33,012 --> 00:13:34,712
Uh, huh.
285
00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:39,495
Well, see, chrissy, you
Know how at big conventions
286
00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:43,366
There are always a lot
Of men and they're lonely?
287
00:13:43,390 --> 00:13:46,168
And darlene just
Helps them relax.
288
00:13:46,192 --> 00:13:49,272
Yeah, she's, uh,
Kind of a hostess.
289
00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:52,274
Oh, you mean like an
Airline stewardess.
290
00:13:52,298 --> 00:13:54,877
Yeah, like an
Airline stewardess.
291
00:13:54,901 --> 00:13:56,445
She gets around a lot.
292
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:59,115
I mean, she does
A lot of traveling.
293
00:13:59,139 --> 00:14:00,616
- really?
- oh, really.
294
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,307
It's a real hustle. Hassle!
295
00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:06,956
Real big hassle, chrissy.
296
00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:09,691
I'm gonna get down there
And get that coffee, okay?
297
00:14:09,715 --> 00:14:10,715
okay.
298
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:16,732
Wow. You look beautiful.
299
00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:18,734
Think it's too much, chrissy?
300
00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:20,625
Not for your job.
301
00:14:21,928 --> 00:14:22,939
What?
302
00:14:22,963 --> 00:14:24,874
Well, janet told
Me all about it.
303
00:14:24,898 --> 00:14:26,942
Oh, I didn't think
She'd say anything.
304
00:14:26,966 --> 00:14:29,967
Why? I think what
You do is wonderful.
305
00:14:31,604 --> 00:14:32,748
You do?
306
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,483
Yeah.
307
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,941
In fact, I'd like to
Take a try at it myself.
308
00:14:38,678 --> 00:14:40,322
What?
309
00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:42,992
Well, I know it'd take a while
For me to get the hang of it,
310
00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:46,616
But if you'd just let me watch
You work, I know I could do it.
311
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,398
Um, chrissy, uh,
312
00:14:49,422 --> 00:14:51,400
I don't really
Think it's for you.
313
00:14:51,424 --> 00:14:53,568
Hey, it can't be
Any more difficult
314
00:14:53,592 --> 00:14:55,737
Than what I'm already
Doing in my own job.
315
00:14:55,761 --> 00:15:00,075
You ought to see some of the
Things my boss asks me to do.
316
00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:03,012
Especially when we've
Got out-of-town buyers.
317
00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:05,080
I never would have believed it.
318
00:15:05,104 --> 00:15:09,106
Least you get paid for it.
All I ever get's a free dinner.
319
00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:14,423
Chrissy, chrissy, you
Sure have changed.
320
00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:16,725
Haven't we all?
321
00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:18,860
Touché.
322
00:15:18,884 --> 00:15:21,730
Darlene, let me go with
You tonight. I know I can do it.
323
00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:24,400
Well, I don't know, chrissy.
If you're really serious...
324
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,835
I am, I am. Let's go, okay?
325
00:15:26,859 --> 00:15:27,958
Okay.
326
00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:31,807
Whoa, hey, what's the hurry?
327
00:15:31,831 --> 00:15:33,876
We can't talk, jack.
We have to go to work.
328
00:15:33,900 --> 00:15:36,879
- work?
- yeah, darlene's taking
Me to the convention.
329
00:15:36,903 --> 00:15:39,415
Well, have fun. Darlene?
330
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,583
- are we on for tomorrow?
- yes.
331
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,888
And I'm looking
Forward to it, jack.
332
00:15:49,950 --> 00:15:52,950
"Yes, and I'm looking
Forward to it, jack."
333
00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:59,167
♪ I want a girl
Just like the girl ♪
334
00:15:59,191 --> 00:16:02,972
♪ who married dear old dad. ♪
335
00:16:02,996 --> 00:16:05,140
Hi, mom? This is jack.
336
00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:08,477
No, I wasn't crying,
Mother. I was singing.
337
00:16:08,501 --> 00:16:10,146
Don't make any
Plans for tomorrow.
338
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,415
I'm coming down to
See you. Yeah, yeah.
339
00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:14,150
And I'm bringing
Someone special.
340
00:16:14,174 --> 00:16:16,818
Her name is darlene.
341
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:21,357
She's the kind of girl you've
Always wanted me to bring home.
342
00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:24,393
She's a kind of small-town
Girl, very sweet,
343
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:26,628
And very safe?
344
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:28,430
And very nice.
345
00:16:28,454 --> 00:16:30,499
In fact, she's a lot like you.
346
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:33,902
Listen, mom, I don't wanna
Sell her to you over the phone.
347
00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:35,571
You'll be able to
Judge her tomorrow.
348
00:16:35,595 --> 00:16:38,362
I'll see you later,
Mom. I gotta go, bye!
349
00:16:40,232 --> 00:16:42,378
Would you mind
Explaining yourself?
350
00:16:42,402 --> 00:16:44,880
- jack.
- was it so important
That it couldn't wait?
351
00:16:44,904 --> 00:16:47,283
Jack, darlene is a
$100-a-night call girl.
352
00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:50,974
I don't care. When a guy's
Talking to his mo-o-other...
353
00:16:52,412 --> 00:16:54,178
Call girl?
354
00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:57,259
That's right.
355
00:16:57,283 --> 00:16:59,528
She can't be. I
Mean, miss einstein.
356
00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:01,997
So, she's a smart call girl.
357
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,333
I don't believe it.
358
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,335
Believe it, jack. She
Told me so herself.
359
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:09,005
And we can't let chrissy know.
360
00:17:09,029 --> 00:17:12,875
If chrissy doesn't already
Know, she's about to find out.
361
00:17:12,899 --> 00:17:14,743
What do you mean?
362
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:17,746
She went off to
Work with darlene!
363
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:20,216
- what?
- they left two minutes ago.
364
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,218
Oh, oh! We have to go get her!
365
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:25,488
Wait, wait, janet, wait. What
Are we getting so excited about?
366
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,990
- huh?
- chrissy's not about
To do anything crazy.
367
00:17:28,014 --> 00:17:29,492
- oh, right.
- she's a...
368
00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:32,728
A sweet, nice, innocent girl.
369
00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:35,731
Which is exactly what those guys
At the convention are looking for.
370
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,933
- you get larry's car,
I'll get my purse.
- let's go.
371
00:17:37,957 --> 00:17:39,268
Oh.
372
00:17:39,292 --> 00:17:40,591
No.
373
00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:45,740
Hey, janet, grab my jacket.
374
00:17:45,764 --> 00:17:47,842
Larry, just in time.
375
00:17:47,866 --> 00:17:49,612
Darlene's a call girl.
376
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:51,280
Could you run that by me again?
377
00:17:51,304 --> 00:17:54,216
She's a $100-a-night call girl.
378
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,619
There's no time to explain, so
Please, larry, I need your help.
379
00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:59,309
Gee, I'd love to, jack,
But I'm down to my last $3.
380
00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,348
- hi.
- ohh.
381
00:18:26,372 --> 00:18:29,139
- is anybody here lonely?
- yes!
382
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:33,789
Do you, uh, think
You can help us out?
383
00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:35,791
Well, that's what I'm here for.
384
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:38,660
Oh, then you're, uh,
Working here tonight.
385
00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:42,498
Well, yes and no. I mean, I'm
Working, but I'm not getting paid.
386
00:18:42,522 --> 00:18:44,700
- you're not?
- no.
387
00:18:44,724 --> 00:18:46,935
This is my first time.
388
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,959
Have some champagne.
389
00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:55,677
- where is she? I don't see her.
- jack, please calm down.
390
00:18:55,701 --> 00:18:58,013
I am calm!
391
00:18:58,037 --> 00:19:00,015
I, uh... I'm sorry, miss.
392
00:19:00,039 --> 00:19:02,351
I seem to have lost my name tag.
393
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:04,487
You don't need a name
Tag, mr. Swackhammer.
394
00:19:04,511 --> 00:19:06,455
Oh, thank you.
395
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:07,790
Follow me.
396
00:19:07,814 --> 00:19:10,059
Excuse me, miss, I left
My name tag upstairs.
397
00:19:10,083 --> 00:19:13,195
- I'm sorry, but you can't
Get in without one.
- but you let that guy in.
398
00:19:13,219 --> 00:19:15,731
Mr. Swackhammer? He's
Chairman of the board.
399
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:17,499
Wonderful party!
400
00:19:17,523 --> 00:19:19,501
Oh, great. Having fun, buddy?
401
00:19:19,525 --> 00:19:22,137
Just great. How about you?
402
00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:23,806
I'm fine.
403
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:26,208
Listen, why don't we step
Outside for a breath of fresh air?
404
00:19:26,232 --> 00:19:27,209
Sure.
405
00:19:27,233 --> 00:19:28,877
Jack? Jack?
406
00:19:33,939 --> 00:19:36,218
What do you know? I didn't
Leave it upstairs after all.
407
00:19:36,242 --> 00:19:37,686
Go right in, mr. Blake.
408
00:19:37,710 --> 00:19:39,188
- mr. Who?
- blake.
409
00:19:39,212 --> 00:19:41,256
- oh, yes.
- jack, there she is.
410
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:42,479
Oh, good.
411
00:19:43,582 --> 00:19:45,059
- hi there.
- hi.
412
00:19:45,083 --> 00:19:47,763
- can I help you?
- I'm looking for a girl.
413
00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:50,099
You certainly came
To the right place.
414
00:19:50,123 --> 00:19:51,155
Mercy.
415
00:19:54,394 --> 00:19:55,871
Pardon me, miss.
416
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:57,973
- huh?
- have you seen my wife?
417
00:19:57,997 --> 00:20:00,631
- no.
- good, then I'll
Buy you a drink.
418
00:20:02,202 --> 00:20:04,513
Are you here to have
Fun, or to find chrissy?
419
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,236
- what?
- there she is.
420
00:20:07,340 --> 00:20:09,752
Charley, charley blake.
421
00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:11,754
- huh?
- I've been waiting
To meet you.
422
00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:15,457
Wha... Top vice
President of sales.
423
00:20:15,481 --> 00:20:17,593
- that's me.
- and the biggest phony
Of the bunch!
424
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:20,328
- what?
- you wouldn't even
Answer my phone calls.
425
00:20:20,352 --> 00:20:23,131
Now, what the hell happened
To that shipment I ordered?
426
00:20:23,155 --> 00:20:25,467
Shipment? Oh, oh!
The ship... Tomorrow.
427
00:20:25,491 --> 00:20:27,469
Tomorrow your
Shipment will come in,
428
00:20:27,493 --> 00:20:30,293
Or my name's not
Uh, uh, charley blake.
429
00:20:31,430 --> 00:20:33,475
- it better be there.
- you got it.
430
00:20:33,499 --> 00:20:35,944
Are you here to make business
Deals, or to save chrissy?
431
00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:37,278
Cut it out, janet.
432
00:20:37,302 --> 00:20:39,281
Oh, look, look,
Jack. There she is.
433
00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:41,238
And the winner is...
434
00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:44,319
Room 104.
435
00:20:44,343 --> 00:20:47,022
- that's my room! Let's go.
- where we goin'?
436
00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:49,524
- nowhere! Come here, chrissy.
- what are you...
437
00:20:49,548 --> 00:20:51,594
- game's over, mister.
- wait a minute, buddy.
438
00:20:51,618 --> 00:20:53,729
- you're not taking
Her anywhere.
- hang on.
439
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:57,666
Hey, it's not for me.
Mr. Swackhammer sent for her.
440
00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,623
- swackhammer?
- yeah.
441
00:21:02,528 --> 00:21:05,207
- hey, what are you
Guys doing here?
- chrissy, come on.
442
00:21:05,231 --> 00:21:06,808
You have to... It's
Past your bedtime.
443
00:21:06,832 --> 00:21:08,377
But I don't want to go to bed.
444
00:21:08,401 --> 00:21:10,961
That's why we're
Taking you home.
445
00:21:15,073 --> 00:21:17,118
Darlene, anything
I can help you with?
446
00:21:17,142 --> 00:21:19,120
no, thanks, jack.
I'm all packed.
447
00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:20,756
Uh-huh.
448
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:23,259
Gee, I'm sorry we didn't get
A chance to see your mother.
449
00:21:23,283 --> 00:21:24,926
Uh, yeah, well, uh,
450
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:27,596
It's too bad she got
Bitten by that old flu bug.
451
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:29,265
I thought it was arthritis.
452
00:21:29,289 --> 00:21:31,833
Oh, yeah, well, that's,
Well, where it bit her,
453
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:34,670
In her arthritis.
454
00:21:34,694 --> 00:21:38,140
Darlene, your cab's
Down there. Here you go.
455
00:21:38,164 --> 00:21:40,743
- don't you think I should wait
And say goodbye to chrissy?
- no, no, huh-uh.
456
00:21:40,767 --> 00:21:43,612
See, she's gonna be
Gone for a very long time.
457
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,114
Yeah, maybe longer.
458
00:21:45,138 --> 00:21:47,578
When she goes shopping,
She's off for hours.
459
00:21:48,541 --> 00:21:50,085
Hi.
460
00:21:50,109 --> 00:21:53,522
My, how time flies.
461
00:21:53,546 --> 00:21:56,058
I'm so glad I got to see
You before you left.
462
00:21:56,082 --> 00:21:58,394
- do you have to move
In to the hotel?
- yes, I do.
463
00:21:58,418 --> 00:22:01,663
- and it'll be closer
To my work.
- aww.
464
00:22:01,687 --> 00:22:04,399
I just want you to know, I
Really had a good time last night.
465
00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:07,136
Everyone was so friendly.
466
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,338
Friendly. Isn't she priceless?
467
00:22:10,362 --> 00:22:13,297
Yes, she is, and she's
Gonna stay that way.
468
00:22:16,903 --> 00:22:18,547
Oh, well, it's time to go.
469
00:22:18,571 --> 00:22:21,216
Well, goodbye. Have a
Good time at the convention.
470
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:22,520
Chrissy.
471
00:22:23,375 --> 00:22:24,575
Yeah.
472
00:22:25,444 --> 00:22:26,444
Bye.
473
00:22:27,813 --> 00:22:29,191
Oh.
474
00:22:29,215 --> 00:22:32,661
Poor darlene. She really
Puts up a front, doesn't she?
475
00:22:32,685 --> 00:22:34,930
She does?
476
00:22:34,954 --> 00:22:37,499
Oh, come on.
477
00:22:37,523 --> 00:22:39,935
She may have fooled you
Two, but she didn't fool me.
478
00:22:39,959 --> 00:22:42,337
- she didn't?
- no.
479
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:44,806
She's not really happy
Doing what she's doing.
480
00:22:44,830 --> 00:22:46,541
She's not?
481
00:22:46,565 --> 00:22:48,443
Of course not.
482
00:22:48,467 --> 00:22:50,801
What she needs is a man.
483
00:23:00,679 --> 00:23:04,259
Come on, chrissy. Mother's
Expecting us by 3:30.
484
00:23:04,283 --> 00:23:07,328
- just a minute.
- it's a two-hour drive
To san diego, remember?
485
00:23:07,352 --> 00:23:10,999
- I'm trying to write a
Birthday card to your mother.
- chrissy, please.
486
00:23:11,023 --> 00:23:12,868
Okay, okay, okay.
Just listen to this.
487
00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:15,203
As though we had a choice.
488
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:18,540
"M is for the mother
Of our very best friend.
489
00:23:18,564 --> 00:23:21,131
"O" is for oh, she really is.
490
00:23:23,135 --> 00:23:25,681
"T" is for the tender
Care she gave him.
491
00:23:25,705 --> 00:23:27,015
"H" is for..."
492
00:23:27,039 --> 00:23:28,250
Hurry up.
493
00:23:28,274 --> 00:23:31,387
No, "H" is for "Heart so pure."
494
00:23:31,411 --> 00:23:34,089
Put it all together
And it spells "Moth."
495
00:23:34,113 --> 00:23:35,591
Okay, good, chrissy.
496
00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:38,059
Let's go, all right? Let's
Move it, come on, please.
497
00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,161
- I'll finish it in the car.
- wait, wait, wait, wait.
498
00:23:40,185 --> 00:23:42,664
Did you ever bother to tell your
Mother that we all live together?
499
00:23:42,688 --> 00:23:44,867
- chrissy: yeah.
- uh, no.
500
00:23:44,891 --> 00:23:47,602
Well, jack, maybe
We better not go.
501
00:23:47,626 --> 00:23:50,405
- I'm gonna tell her today.
- today?
502
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,941
Yeah, isn't that gonna be
A bit of a shock for her?
503
00:23:52,965 --> 00:23:55,477
No, because my mother is
Very broad-minded and liberal.
504
00:23:55,501 --> 00:23:57,646
- she's as modern as they come.
- janet: oh.
505
00:23:57,670 --> 00:24:00,261
There's just one thing though.
She happens to be nearsighted.
506
00:24:00,285 --> 00:24:00,783
Janet: so?
507
00:24:00,807 --> 00:24:03,652
So if I introduce you
As dave and you as tom,
508
00:24:03,676 --> 00:24:05,320
Just play along with it, okay?
509
00:24:05,344 --> 00:24:06,777
Jack!
510
00:24:34,340 --> 00:24:37,686
John ritter: three's company was
Videotaped in front of a studio audience.
38188
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