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1
00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:06,005
This is the story of two sisters,
2
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,007
Jessica Tate
3
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,010
and Mary Campbell.
4
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,013
These are the Tates,
5
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:17,516
and these are the Campbells.
6
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:20,519
And this is Soap.
7
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,557
Oh!
8
00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,560
Oh, I'm sorry.
9
00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:06,565
Oh!
10
00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:08,567
Maggie, why are we doing this?
11
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,069
Just relax, Dallas, relax.
12
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,071
I mean, when you said,
"dress casual,"
13
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,572
I figured, maybe
a champagne brunch,
14
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,074
but this...
15
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:17,576
I got a message
to meet an informer here,
16
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:19,078
someone with news about Wendy.
17
00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,580
Do you know why
people come here?
18
00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,582
Do you have any idea?
We could be arrested.
19
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:24,583
For what?
20
00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:26,085
We're standing here.
21
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:27,586
All right,
that couple over there,
22
00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:29,088
they're not breaking the law?
23
00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:30,590
Of course not.
24
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,093
Now they are.
25
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,094
Come on, this is crazy!
26
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,095
No, no, wait a minute.
27
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,097
We're gonna stay
and meet our contact.
28
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,098
Right, who is he?
29
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,099
Never met him.
30
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,601
You don't know
what he looks like?
31
00:01:42,602 --> 00:01:44,103
How are we gonna single him out?
32
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,604
I mean, it's not like he can
33
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:47,606
wear a carnation in his lapel.
34
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:49,108
Why don't we just
sit down over here,
35
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:51,611
See who pops by, okay?
36
00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,614
Hi.
37
00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,616
Well, hi, there.
38
00:01:57,617 --> 00:02:00,552
Mm, you have a great body.
39
00:02:00,553 --> 00:02:01,487
Ha.
40
00:02:01,488 --> 00:02:04,490
You have a great towel.
41
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,893
I'll be in room 12.
42
00:02:11,831 --> 00:02:13,232
Seemed like a nice person.
43
00:02:14,567 --> 00:02:16,068
What was that all about?
44
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:19,538
Oh, Maggie, she was
just... flirting,
45
00:02:19,539 --> 00:02:21,039
it's no reason to be jealous.
46
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:22,541
Oh, well, I'm not jealous
47
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:23,542
when they flirt.
48
00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:24,944
I'm jealous when you flirt.
49
00:02:25,378 --> 00:02:26,879
Oh!
50
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,882
Come on, Maggie,
it's bound to happen.
51
00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,383
I mean, we're adults.
52
00:02:31,384 --> 00:02:32,885
These things happen.
53
00:02:32,886 --> 00:02:34,821
Look, it's no big deal.
54
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:39,825
Hi.
55
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,827
Hey, jocko, I'm sitting there.
56
00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,829
She is with me, I am with her,
57
00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:45,831
we are together.
Do you understand that?
58
00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:47,700
And we'd like to be
alone. Thank you.
59
00:02:52,144 --> 00:02:53,705
Jodie, that could
have been our contact.
60
00:02:53,706 --> 00:02:55,207
The only thing
he wanted to contact
61
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:57,210
is wrapped up in your towel.
62
00:02:58,211 --> 00:02:59,211
Maggie?
Hey, you pervert!
63
00:02:59,212 --> 00:03:01,213
Get away from us, huh?
For God's sake...
64
00:03:01,214 --> 00:03:02,714
No, don't hold me back...
Jodie!
65
00:03:02,715 --> 00:03:03,715
What are you...?
66
00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:04,716
Just put your hands up, okay?
67
00:03:04,717 --> 00:03:06,718
I have your information.
68
00:03:06,719 --> 00:03:08,721
Oh, sorry,
just first impressions.
69
00:03:12,225 --> 00:03:14,227
For you.
70
00:03:17,730 --> 00:03:18,731
For you.
71
00:03:20,233 --> 00:03:21,733
Do you wanna take a shower?
72
00:03:21,734 --> 00:03:23,235
No thanks. No thanks.
73
00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:28,740
Uh-oh!
74
00:03:28,741 --> 00:03:30,242
What is it, what is it?
75
00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:31,244
Here, read.
76
00:03:32,745 --> 00:03:34,213
"Your daughter is living
77
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:38,116
in a kung-fu fortress
in Malibu."
78
00:03:38,117 --> 00:03:39,618
Malibu?
79
00:03:39,619 --> 00:03:41,053
Yeah. There's
a flight out tonight.
80
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,555
Come on, let's go.
81
00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:46,058
Well, since it's Malibu,
I won't have to change.
82
00:04:06,212 --> 00:04:10,215
Excuse, please, Don O'Donnelly,
83
00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:12,217
but we can't... Huh?
84
00:04:12,218 --> 00:04:14,220
Can't understand
what you're saying.
85
00:04:16,723 --> 00:04:18,725
We can't hear.
Oh, oh, oh.
86
00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:21,727
My apologies, gentleman.
87
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:22,728
I have root canal.
88
00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:24,229
They told me to keep it packed.
89
00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:31,703
I know I speak for all of us
when I extend my sympathy
90
00:04:31,704 --> 00:04:33,205
for the passing of Vito Hersh.
91
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,706
Oh, yeah.
Oh, it's a shame.
92
00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:36,708
Whose heart
unfortunately gave out
93
00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:38,710
moments after
his throat was cut.
94
00:04:40,713 --> 00:04:44,182
This, of course, creates
a vacancy in Arizona,
95
00:04:44,183 --> 00:04:46,685
which I have decided
to fill with Elmore Tibbs.
96
00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:48,687
Hey, thank you.
Thank you, Don O'Donnelly.
97
00:04:48,688 --> 00:04:50,188
That's all right.
Thank you.
98
00:04:50,189 --> 00:04:51,189
Well, heh, heh.
99
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:52,691
Oh, please.
100
00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:53,692
I would like to say first
101
00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:55,193
that I am really looking forward
102
00:04:55,194 --> 00:04:57,195
to taking over
our Arizona operations.
103
00:04:57,196 --> 00:04:59,197
See, I get these headaches,
and I know Scottsdale
104
00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:01,700
is gonna be very good
for my sinuses.
105
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:02,701
Now, why don't you stand up
106
00:05:02,702 --> 00:05:04,202
and tell us what's going on
107
00:05:04,203 --> 00:05:06,204
in Connecticut?
108
00:05:06,205 --> 00:05:08,707
All right, well.
Well, first,
109
00:05:08,708 --> 00:05:11,710
there's a kink in
our massage-parlor operations.
110
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:14,713
The new sheriff of Dunn's River
will not cooperate.
111
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:17,215
Now, I've threatened him,
I roughed him up,
112
00:05:17,216 --> 00:05:20,218
I've blackmailed him, but still,
he's breathing down my neck.
113
00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:23,188
Well, I finally had to
take out his deputy.
114
00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:26,024
So needless to say,
the heat is on.
115
00:05:27,427 --> 00:05:28,927
Hey, what...?
116
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:30,429
Don't worry about it.
117
00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:32,931
One of the bodyguards,
probably Moose,
118
00:05:32,932 --> 00:05:33,933
must have seen a duck.
119
00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:39,939
Must have seen a whole flock.
120
00:05:41,441 --> 00:05:42,941
Well, yeah.
121
00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:46,445
Anyway, this Sheriff Campbell
has got to be dealt with.
122
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:47,446
I think...
123
00:05:56,456 --> 00:05:58,458
All right.
Drop it!
124
00:06:01,901 --> 00:06:03,462
It's not your bagels,
I meant your guns.
125
00:06:03,463 --> 00:06:04,464
Sit down!
126
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:06,965
We don't carry guns.
127
00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:09,468
That's what we got security for.
128
00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:11,470
Yeah. You took
this place alone?
129
00:06:11,471 --> 00:06:12,471
Yeah, that's right,
130
00:06:12,472 --> 00:06:13,972
I took this place all by myself.
131
00:06:13,973 --> 00:06:15,474
Hey, yeah, that's right.
132
00:06:15,475 --> 00:06:17,976
Wait a minute, you.
Hey!
133
00:06:17,977 --> 00:06:19,478
You, you're him, aren't you?
134
00:06:19,479 --> 00:06:20,979
Who?
Who? You, who.
135
00:06:20,980 --> 00:06:23,482
Mr. Big, here.
The Godfather!
136
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:24,983
Godfather?
137
00:06:24,984 --> 00:06:27,986
Yeah, like an organized
crime... syndicate.
138
00:06:27,987 --> 00:06:29,488
Syndicate?
139
00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:31,490
There's no such thing
as a syndicate.
140
00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:33,492
I'm just an honest businessman
from Bayonne.
141
00:06:33,493 --> 00:06:34,493
Who are you?
142
00:06:34,494 --> 00:06:36,995
Burt Campbell.
Sheriff, Connecticut.
143
00:06:36,996 --> 00:06:38,497
No more, stop that.
144
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:44,002
Uh, will there be anything else, monsieur?
145
00:06:44,003 --> 00:06:46,505
Perhaps another carafe
of the chardonnay?
146
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:51,009
Yes, should I bring you
perhaps an apéritif, monsieur?
147
00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:52,511
Do... Yeah.
Yeah, give me a beer.
148
00:06:52,512 --> 00:06:54,012
Yes, I'll be right back.
Godfather.
149
00:06:54,013 --> 00:06:55,013
Tibbs!
150
00:06:55,014 --> 00:06:57,015
Aah!
151
00:06:57,016 --> 00:06:58,016
Don't...
152
00:06:58,017 --> 00:06:59,518
You sly...
153
00:06:59,519 --> 00:07:00,519
No, please!
154
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,521
You scum!
No, please. Have mercy!
155
00:07:02,522 --> 00:07:04,523
Mercy?
You want mercy, huh?
156
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:05,524
My son's fighting for his life
157
00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:06,525
because of you.
158
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:08,026
I'm gonna put you away, Tibbs.
159
00:07:08,027 --> 00:07:09,528
I'm gonna put you...
Please!
160
00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:11,029
Mr. Campbell.
161
00:07:11,030 --> 00:07:13,532
Hey, it's just you and us, huh?
162
00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:14,533
Maybe we can make a deal.
163
00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:17,036
I can make you
a very wealthy man.
164
00:07:17,537 --> 00:07:18,537
Ooh!
165
00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:22,040
Maybe not.
166
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:24,042
I don't make deals with garbage.
167
00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:27,045
All right, come on,
everybody up, here.
168
00:07:27,046 --> 00:07:28,547
On your feet,
I'm taking everybody...
169
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:30,049
On your knees!
170
00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:33,051
Gonzo, get up here.
171
00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:35,053
All right, everybody
goes homes with me, here.
172
00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:37,556
Come on.
Come on, come on.
173
00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:39,058
Come on, come on, go.
174
00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,247
Mary?
175
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:03,748
Chester.
176
00:08:03,749 --> 00:08:05,250
I got here
as quickly as I could.
177
00:08:05,251 --> 00:08:07,252
Is something wrong?
How's Danny?
178
00:08:07,253 --> 00:08:08,753
He needs a kidney.
179
00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:11,156
Kidney, you're kidding!
180
00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:14,659
Chester, would I kid
about a kidney?
181
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,161
They won't take one of mine.
182
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:17,162
Why?
183
00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,663
They're not good enough.
184
00:08:18,664 --> 00:08:20,665
Oh.
185
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:22,167
How about Jodie?
186
00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,169
No!
187
00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:25,670
You could run an ad.
188
00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:28,640
He needs a kidney
of a blood relative.
189
00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:31,142
Oh, well, if you're out
and Jodie's out,
190
00:08:31,143 --> 00:08:32,143
what are you gonna do?
191
00:08:32,144 --> 00:08:34,646
He needs your kidney, Chester.
192
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:37,649
Oh, ho, ho, ho.
Well, Mary, I'd be delighted,
193
00:08:37,650 --> 00:08:40,652
I'd give him one in a shot,
but I'm hardly a blood relative.
194
00:08:40,653 --> 00:08:42,153
Yes, you are.
195
00:08:42,154 --> 00:08:44,656
No, no, Mary.
I'm his uncle.
196
00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:46,658
No, you're not.
197
00:08:46,659 --> 00:08:47,660
You're his father.
198
00:08:56,402 --> 00:08:58,904
Yeah, Chester.
199
00:09:00,406 --> 00:09:02,908
Before you married Jessica,
remember?
200
00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:04,376
You kidding?
201
00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:06,878
No.
202
00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:11,883
Mary, that was...
That one time.
203
00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:14,753
No, Chester, it was two weeks.
204
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:16,789
Every night.
205
00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:20,159
Two weeks every night?
206
00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:23,162
Ha, ha.
Boy, those were the days!
207
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:29,668
I wish I could do
half that now, even a quarter.
208
00:09:31,170 --> 00:09:32,171
Chester.
209
00:09:34,106 --> 00:09:37,576
Mary, why didn't you
ever tell me?
210
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:38,944
I didn't know.
211
00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:41,846
For 28 years?
212
00:09:41,847 --> 00:09:43,348
When I realized I was pregnant,
213
00:09:43,349 --> 00:09:45,850
you suddenly announced
you were gonna marry Jessica.
214
00:09:45,851 --> 00:09:47,852
Mary, I was forced into that.
215
00:09:47,853 --> 00:09:51,356
Your mother was gonna
have my father arrested!
216
00:09:51,357 --> 00:09:52,857
Well, it doesn't matter now.
217
00:09:52,858 --> 00:09:55,360
What matters is Danny.
218
00:09:55,361 --> 00:09:56,828
You're his father, Chester.
219
00:09:56,829 --> 00:09:59,764
You're the only one
that can give him a kidney,
220
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:02,200
You'll do it, of course.
221
00:10:05,972 --> 00:10:06,972
Chester?
222
00:10:09,342 --> 00:10:11,344
Mary, are you sure he's my son?
223
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:13,845
He is your son, Chester.
224
00:10:13,846 --> 00:10:15,847
Do you think that I would
ask you for your kidney
225
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:16,849
if he wasn't?
226
00:10:18,317 --> 00:10:20,437
If you weren't his father,
your kidney would kill him!
227
00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:24,823
You realize everyone will know?
228
00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:26,504
If I give the kidney,
it will give it away.
229
00:10:28,728 --> 00:10:32,698
Chester, without your kidney,
Danny will die.
230
00:10:50,216 --> 00:10:51,216
El!
231
00:10:51,217 --> 00:10:53,219
Oh, my. Hide, hide.
232
00:10:57,723 --> 00:11:00,225
El, could I speak
with you a mom...?
233
00:11:00,226 --> 00:11:01,726
Jessica!
Heh, heh, heh.
234
00:11:01,727 --> 00:11:02,727
What are you doing here?
235
00:11:02,728 --> 00:11:05,730
Well, well.
236
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:07,232
Well, well, well.
237
00:11:08,655 --> 00:11:10,735
This... This lady is from
the Immigration department.
238
00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:11,736
Uh-huh.
239
00:11:11,737 --> 00:11:13,705
Oh, really?
Yes.
240
00:11:13,706 --> 00:11:15,206
Now, you see,
you have to go straight
241
00:11:15,207 --> 00:11:16,708
up the stairs here,
out the front door,
242
00:11:16,709 --> 00:11:18,710
and it would be
the third house on your left.
243
00:11:18,711 --> 00:11:19,711
Uh-huh.
Yes, yes, yes.
244
00:11:19,712 --> 00:11:20,712
Um, you will see...
245
00:11:20,713 --> 00:11:23,214
You will see they have
two illegal aliens
246
00:11:23,215 --> 00:11:25,216
doing the gardening.
247
00:11:25,217 --> 00:11:26,718
See ya.
248
00:11:28,721 --> 00:11:30,722
I forgot to renew my green card.
249
00:11:30,723 --> 00:11:32,223
Really?
250
00:11:32,224 --> 00:11:34,225
Yeah. Do you know
what she suggested?
251
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,226
I bribe her.
252
00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:36,227
I... I was shocked!
253
00:11:36,228 --> 00:11:37,729
How dare you?!
254
00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:40,231
Oh, well, I could have been
deported, you know.
255
00:11:40,232 --> 00:11:41,232
It was a small bribe.
256
00:11:41,233 --> 00:11:42,734
I can't believe this!
257
00:11:42,735 --> 00:11:43,735
I couldn't, either.
258
00:11:43,736 --> 00:11:45,737
I mean, corruption
in government!
259
00:11:45,738 --> 00:11:48,239
I knock myself out
to make myself
260
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,241
look wonderful for you,
I shopped for days
261
00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:52,243
for just the right nightgown,
262
00:11:52,244 --> 00:11:55,747
and then last night,
I threw myself at you,
263
00:11:55,748 --> 00:11:57,248
and you walked out of the room.
264
00:11:57,249 --> 00:11:59,250
And now today I find you
with another woman.
265
00:11:59,251 --> 00:12:00,752
Oh, Jessica,
that was not a woman,
266
00:12:00,753 --> 00:12:02,254
that was a prostitute.
267
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:06,257
Besides, I do it for you!
268
00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:07,759
I see.
269
00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:10,762
To protect you
from my lustful advances.
270
00:12:10,763 --> 00:12:12,263
Fine.
271
00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:13,732
If you can go out
with other women,
272
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,233
then I can go out
with other men.
273
00:12:15,234 --> 00:12:16,735
Oh, no, no, no, no, Jessica!
274
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,236
Please, no, no, no.
275
00:12:18,237 --> 00:12:19,738
Please. Okay,
first of all
276
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,740
I do not go out with them.
277
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,742
I would never go out with them.
278
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:24,783
I just have sex with them.
279
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,746
Well, if you can
do it, so can I.
280
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:28,747
Jessica, please.
281
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,749
Now, you are not
that type of woman.
282
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,751
So far.
That's the problem.
283
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,252
No, Jessica, please.
284
00:12:34,253 --> 00:12:35,754
Will you sit down over here?
285
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:36,755
Let me explain this to you.
286
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,256
You've everything
all upside down.
287
00:12:38,257 --> 00:12:40,258
Now, this is a man's
thing, this passion.
288
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,259
Men are all the same.
289
00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:42,761
Woman are different.
290
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:43,762
They come in two shapes.
291
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:46,264
There are the ones that
make love and are garbage,
292
00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:48,267
and the ones who go
to heaven when they die.
293
00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,605
Who says?
294
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,107
God.
295
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,944
Told you personally, I suppose.
296
00:12:59,945 --> 00:13:01,946
No. Jessica,
the point is this,
297
00:13:01,947 --> 00:13:03,782
I have asked you to marry me
298
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:06,284
a long time now,
and you always say no.
299
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,287
So, until you say yes, Jess,
300
00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:10,789
go to other women,
make a little
tiempo,
301
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,290
come home, take a nice shower,
302
00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,291
what's the big deal?
303
00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:15,293
There is no big deal,
304
00:13:15,294 --> 00:13:16,294
but did it ever occur to you
305
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:17,796
that perhaps I might have
306
00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:18,764
some of the same needs as you?
307
00:13:18,765 --> 00:13:22,267
No. Only men
have those needs.
308
00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:24,769
Now, women have needs, yes, yes,
309
00:13:24,770 --> 00:13:26,271
to dance and also
to hold babies.
310
00:13:29,775 --> 00:13:31,176
Wrong.
311
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:32,677
Oh, Jessica.
312
00:13:32,678 --> 00:13:35,180
Jessica, marry me.
Marry me,
313
00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:37,182
and I will stop
all this disgusting stuff
314
00:13:37,183 --> 00:13:39,024
I do with other women,
and do it only with you.
315
00:13:41,053 --> 00:13:43,555
Say I do, and we will.
316
00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:46,058
I can't.
317
00:13:48,060 --> 00:13:49,561
Then I won't.
318
00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:51,029
So don't.
319
00:13:51,030 --> 00:13:52,064
Then you won't.
320
00:13:53,065 --> 00:13:54,066
Wanna bet?
321
00:13:58,571 --> 00:14:00,072
Hmph.
322
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:22,193
Doctor, Mary Campbell
is here to see you.
323
00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:23,695
I'm not in, I'm out.
324
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,698
Tell her I'm out,
I won't be in all day.
325
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:28,700
Hello,
Dr. Drell.
326
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:32,203
Mary, hello!
327
00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:33,705
What a pleasant surprise,
come in.
328
00:14:35,207 --> 00:14:39,210
Oh, look at him,
isn't he adorable?
329
00:14:39,211 --> 00:14:41,713
Hello wittle Scotty,
do you wemember me?
330
00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:43,715
I'm your mommy's gynecowogist.
331
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,717
Doctor, I have to talk to you.
332
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,219
Mary, you talked to me
yesterday.
333
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:49,721
I want a second opinion.
334
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,723
He's not an alien, Mary.
335
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:53,725
Doctor.
336
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,227
Mary, I told you three days ago,
337
00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:58,229
I told you two days before that,
338
00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:00,231
and I told you yesterday,
339
00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:03,735
that baby came
from County General, not Mars.
340
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:06,738
You think I'm crazy, don't you?
341
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,239
Go ahead, you can say it.
342
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,741
You think I'm crazy, right?
343
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,743
Very.
344
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:12,744
He makes sounds.
345
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:15,246
Mary, why do you
keep doing this?
346
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:16,748
This is my son!
347
00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:18,750
There's something
wrong with him!
348
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:19,751
And you're a doctor,
349
00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:21,753
and I am here
because I need your help.
350
00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:25,256
Now, something happened today,
something I cannot explain,
351
00:15:25,257 --> 00:15:28,259
something that gives me
chills up my spine.
352
00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:32,597
Doctor, my baby...
353
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:33,598
flies.
354
00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:39,470
Would you like a bite of this?
355
00:15:39,471 --> 00:15:41,973
It's very good.
Velveeta.
356
00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:44,475
Fine, you think I'm crazy.
That's reasonable.
357
00:15:44,476 --> 00:15:45,977
I mean, you're probably
saying to yourself,
358
00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,846
"How could this little baby
be an alien
359
00:15:48,847 --> 00:15:50,348
when he isn't even silver?"
360
00:15:52,218 --> 00:15:53,218
Am I right?
361
00:15:53,219 --> 00:15:56,220
Well, I was skeptical at first.
362
00:15:56,221 --> 00:16:01,726
Well, see, I didn't actually
see him fly, but he... moves.
363
00:16:01,727 --> 00:16:05,163
It's called crawling, Mary.
Children do that.
364
00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:08,166
They crawl and they eat
and they cry.
365
00:16:08,167 --> 00:16:10,168
He makes alien noises.
366
00:16:10,169 --> 00:16:13,671
He makes those funny noises
aliens make,
367
00:16:13,672 --> 00:16:17,675
those little peeps
and gee-gee-gee-gee-gee sounds.
368
00:16:17,676 --> 00:16:19,177
Ands ick-ick-ick-ick-ick.
369
00:16:20,579 --> 00:16:23,047
I'm not kidding!
370
00:16:23,048 --> 00:16:25,984
All babies make those little
ick-ick-ick-ick-icks.
371
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:26,985
That's how they talk.
372
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,420
They do?
373
00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:31,289
Even ka-ka-ka-ka-ka?
374
00:16:32,257 --> 00:16:35,259
Ka-ka-ka-ka-ka,
ick-ick-ick-ick-ick,
375
00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:36,761
kippa-kippa-kippa-kippa-kippa,
376
00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:38,763
tuppy-tuppy-tuppy-tuppy.
377
00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:41,232
So you just think
I'm overreacting?
378
00:16:41,233 --> 00:16:44,569
Could be that, overreacting.
379
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:47,472
Sounds a little like
overreacting to me.
380
00:16:47,473 --> 00:16:48,973
Look, I have to wash up.
381
00:16:48,974 --> 00:16:52,477
Why don't you ring me,
uh, next month
382
00:16:52,478 --> 00:16:55,480
and let me know
how things are going?
383
00:16:55,481 --> 00:16:57,982
Okay. I'm sorry
I'm such a pest.
384
00:16:57,983 --> 00:16:59,984
Oh, please, I'm your friend.
385
00:16:59,985 --> 00:17:00,985
Thanks.
386
00:17:00,986 --> 00:17:02,487
If it was anything serious...
387
00:17:02,488 --> 00:17:04,490
I'd tell you, honestly.
388
00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:07,492
You're not just trying
389
00:17:07,493 --> 00:17:08,860
to keep something from me?
390
00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:10,362
Yes, me.
391
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,865
Mary, please don't worry.
392
00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,868
He's a perfectly normal
little boy.
393
00:17:20,272 --> 00:17:21,773
Oh, my God.
394
00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:25,777
I gotta run, Mary.
395
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:28,781
Emergency at the hospital.
Thanks for dropping by.
396
00:17:49,835 --> 00:17:51,336
Number 45.
397
00:17:58,844 --> 00:17:59,845
Hai-ya!
398
00:18:03,849 --> 00:18:06,351
Hate to be his dancing partner.
399
00:18:12,858 --> 00:18:14,359
Ai-ya!
400
00:18:33,879 --> 00:18:36,380
They must have quite
a turnover around here.
401
00:18:36,381 --> 00:18:38,382
Listen Jodie, you gotta
promise me something.
402
00:18:38,383 --> 00:18:40,885
If they call your number,
don't do anything foolish.
403
00:18:40,886 --> 00:18:41,886
What do you mean?
404
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:42,887
I mean, I don't want you
405
00:18:42,888 --> 00:18:44,388
to try to fight that guy.
406
00:18:44,389 --> 00:18:45,790
It would be suicide.
407
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:46,791
Maggie, I'd kill myself
408
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:49,193
before I'd fight that guy.
409
00:18:49,194 --> 00:18:50,194
Anyway, don't worry,
410
00:18:50,195 --> 00:18:51,696
they're not gonna call on us.
411
00:19:00,205 --> 00:19:01,706
Maybe we should have
left the gun home
412
00:19:01,707 --> 00:19:03,208
and brought the piano.
413
00:19:04,610 --> 00:19:07,079
Number 19.
414
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:09,514
Jodie, it's your number.
415
00:19:09,515 --> 00:19:11,516
What do you mean?
That's you, that's you.
416
00:19:11,517 --> 00:19:12,517
Number 19.
That's your number.
417
00:19:12,518 --> 00:19:14,018
No, it's not.
It's okay.
418
00:19:14,019 --> 00:19:15,019
I'm, uh...
419
00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:17,522
Sixty-one.
420
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:24,529
Number 19, come forward.
421
00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:34,472
Number 19, why do you
not come forward?
422
00:19:34,473 --> 00:19:36,941
Are you not
a brave ninja warrior?
423
00:19:36,942 --> 00:19:38,376
Huh. Uh, me?
424
00:19:38,377 --> 00:19:39,877
No, I'm... I'm...
425
00:19:39,878 --> 00:19:41,846
I'm a... I'm a brave,
uh, ninja warrior.
426
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:43,347
I, uh...
427
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:45,349
Oh! My number
was upside down.
428
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:46,350
Heh, heh.
Ah.
429
00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:48,286
Then come forward now and fight,
430
00:19:48,287 --> 00:19:50,755
or are you afraid of death?
431
00:19:50,756 --> 00:19:51,757
Ha, ha!
432
00:19:54,259 --> 00:19:56,227
I laugh at death.
433
00:19:56,228 --> 00:19:57,728
You kidding?
434
00:19:57,729 --> 00:19:58,729
I come from a family
435
00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:01,232
with a long history of dying.
436
00:20:01,233 --> 00:20:03,568
Number 19, you're trying
my patience.
437
00:20:03,569 --> 00:20:04,569
I am sorry, Your Highness,
438
00:20:04,570 --> 00:20:08,073
I was just waiting
for my biorhythms to settle.
439
00:20:10,075 --> 00:20:12,077
Jodie, I can't let you
go through with this.
440
00:20:13,579 --> 00:20:16,080
I don't think
we have much choice.
441
00:20:16,081 --> 00:20:17,582
Save it.
442
00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:21,586
Are you ready, Number 19?
443
00:20:21,587 --> 00:20:22,587
Yes, Your Highness.
444
00:20:23,449 --> 00:20:25,089
Uh, how come he gets
the wind at his back?
445
00:20:26,091 --> 00:20:27,091
It's okay, it's okay.
446
00:20:27,092 --> 00:20:28,593
You can have the wind.
447
00:20:30,095 --> 00:20:33,098
Uh, hold it.
I lost a contact.
448
00:20:40,606 --> 00:20:42,608
Enough of this.
449
00:20:44,109 --> 00:20:46,111
Let the fight begin.
450
00:20:52,618 --> 00:20:53,618
Aah!
451
00:20:58,624 --> 00:21:01,125
Okay, pal, come
to Brooklyn, all right.
452
00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:03,128
One time, here you go!
453
00:21:13,138 --> 00:21:15,139
It worked!
454
00:21:15,140 --> 00:21:17,642
The Vulcan neck pinch.
455
00:21:17,643 --> 00:21:19,644
Thank you,
Star Trek!
456
00:21:19,645 --> 00:21:21,146
Scotty, beam us outta here!
457
00:21:22,147 --> 00:21:25,650
Mr. Dallas,
I am impressed.
458
00:21:25,651 --> 00:21:27,151
You are obviously
more resourceful
459
00:21:27,152 --> 00:21:28,653
than Carol had told us.
460
00:21:29,655 --> 00:21:31,122
I know why you are here.
461
00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:32,124
Listen.
462
00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:37,128
You can keep Carol.
463
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,129
All I want is my daughter.
464
00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:40,531
What you want
is of no consequence.
465
00:21:40,532 --> 00:21:41,932
Your daughter is being trained
466
00:21:41,933 --> 00:21:44,268
to become a ninja empress.
467
00:21:44,269 --> 00:21:46,771
She will stay here
and live with our warriors.
468
00:21:46,772 --> 00:21:49,040
As for you,
that is another story.
469
00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:51,008
Hold it right there!
470
00:21:51,009 --> 00:21:54,011
Just hold on one second.
471
00:21:54,012 --> 00:21:56,514
Now, we know the baby
is on the second floor,
472
00:21:56,515 --> 00:21:57,515
and we want her.
473
00:21:59,017 --> 00:22:00,017
You are foolish
474
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:01,519
to think you can beat the ninja
475
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,021
with conventional weapons.
476
00:22:06,525 --> 00:22:08,025
Well, I don't think
you understand.
477
00:22:08,026 --> 00:22:11,028
See, this gun is loaded,
and I can kill you.
478
00:22:11,029 --> 00:22:12,863
And when you do,
479
00:22:12,864 --> 00:22:15,333
my men will swarm on you
like the Cubans on Miami.
480
00:22:18,303 --> 00:22:19,804
Maggie, give him the gun.
481
00:22:22,307 --> 00:22:24,309
I'm sorry, Jodie.
482
00:22:26,812 --> 00:22:28,313
Take them to the dungeon!
483
00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:41,759
Now that Jodie and Maggie
484
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:43,260
have been locked up
in a dungeon forever,
485
00:22:43,261 --> 00:22:44,762
are they upset,
and did they remember
486
00:22:44,763 --> 00:22:46,263
to bring a change of clothes?
487
00:22:46,264 --> 00:22:47,765
Since El Puerco has told Jessica
488
00:22:47,766 --> 00:22:49,266
that he fools around
with other women
489
00:22:49,267 --> 00:22:51,268
to stop himself
from fooling around with her,
490
00:22:51,269 --> 00:22:53,771
will Jessica
start fooling around?
491
00:22:53,772 --> 00:22:55,773
Will they ever fool around
with each other?
492
00:22:55,774 --> 00:22:59,176
Now that Mary has told Chester
that he is Danny's real father,
493
00:22:59,177 --> 00:23:00,678
will Chester find it
in his heart
494
00:23:00,679 --> 00:23:02,179
to give Danny his kidney?
495
00:23:02,180 --> 00:23:04,682
These questions and many others
will be answered
496
00:23:04,683 --> 00:23:07,686
in the next episode of Soap.
33405