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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,634 --> 00:00:07,467 Do you know the speech? I know the gist of it. 2 00:00:07,534 --> 00:00:09,200 You memorize entire homilies. 3 00:00:09,267 --> 00:00:13,234 Homilies are poetry, a plea before the city council is demeaning. 4 00:00:17,634 --> 00:00:20,334 Esteemed councilmen, in a few days, 5 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:22,868 St. Nicholas Church will be torn down. 6 00:00:22,934 --> 00:00:25,067 I have come before you for the fourth time 7 00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:26,634 to beg for your condescension. 8 00:00:26,701 --> 00:00:27,934 Consideration. 9 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,400 Which you have never shown before. 10 00:00:29,467 --> 00:00:30,901 To block the sale of the church. 11 00:00:30,968 --> 00:00:33,000 Because we're not just losing a building. 12 00:00:33,067 --> 00:00:35,334 We're losing a sacrament. 13 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:39,033 The communion with our neighbors is our mass. 14 00:00:39,767 --> 00:00:41,133 Not bad, huh? 15 00:00:42,567 --> 00:00:45,701 Help! Somebody help! 16 00:00:45,767 --> 00:00:47,434 Somebody, please. 17 00:00:50,901 --> 00:00:52,701 Father Paul! 18 00:00:54,667 --> 00:00:55,801 Father Paul. 19 00:00:57,133 --> 00:00:59,400 We need an ambulance. Please send an ambulance. 20 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:08,968 Hey, Sophie's here, man. What do I tell her? 21 00:01:09,033 --> 00:01:10,901 Anything but the truth. 22 00:01:11,868 --> 00:01:13,767 Hey. Hey. 23 00:01:13,834 --> 00:01:16,334 Thank you so much for coming to my play last night. 24 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:18,634 Oh... Last night was awesome. 25 00:01:18,701 --> 00:01:21,467 Oh, thanks, Parker. 26 00:01:21,534 --> 00:01:23,434 Yeah. It was like a horror movie. 27 00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:26,234 Attention must be paid. 28 00:01:29,501 --> 00:01:32,467 I mean, you're not the first person I would think of 29 00:01:32,534 --> 00:01:36,567 to play Willy Lowman, but you worked it out. 30 00:01:36,634 --> 00:01:38,167 Yeah. 31 00:01:38,234 --> 00:01:39,934 Oh! 32 00:01:43,501 --> 00:01:45,267 That was the worst night of my life. 33 00:01:45,334 --> 00:01:48,167 Come on, man. You've been in worse situations. 34 00:01:57,567 --> 00:01:59,667 No. No, that was the worst. 35 00:02:02,634 --> 00:02:03,734 Mmm. 36 00:02:05,133 --> 00:02:06,767 How great were you? 37 00:02:06,834 --> 00:02:09,534 I mean, they ought to call it Death of a Saleswoman. 38 00:02:09,601 --> 00:02:13,501 What a great commentary on the glass ceiling for women in corporate America. 39 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:17,000 Nate, I played the part as a man. 40 00:02:18,234 --> 00:02:20,934 Yes. And brilliantly. 41 00:02:23,701 --> 00:02:24,934 Thanks. 42 00:02:26,534 --> 00:02:28,934 I mean, you were... Huh? 43 00:02:30,167 --> 00:02:32,000 Hold on. I have to... 44 00:02:34,968 --> 00:02:36,334 Hi, Maggie? 45 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,434 Is everything okay? When? 46 00:02:39,501 --> 00:02:41,567 Who's Maggie? 47 00:02:41,634 --> 00:02:43,634 Nate's ex wife. 48 00:02:50,834 --> 00:02:52,968 Hey. 49 00:02:53,033 --> 00:02:56,834 If I thought I'd get you to visit I'd have gotten my ribs kicked in a little sooner. 50 00:02:56,901 --> 00:02:58,133 How you doing, Paul? 51 00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,901 I got my shots in. 52 00:02:59,968 --> 00:03:02,934 I popped the first guy in the shoulder before I blacked out. 53 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:06,467 Yeah. I know. I read the police report. 54 00:03:06,534 --> 00:03:07,701 You read the police report. 55 00:03:07,767 --> 00:03:09,300 I do that. 56 00:03:10,501 --> 00:03:13,501 You talk to Maggie? 57 00:03:13,567 --> 00:03:17,033 Do you think it was a coincidence that you got attacked on your way 58 00:03:17,100 --> 00:03:19,868 to beg the city council to save your church? 59 00:03:19,934 --> 00:03:23,300 No, I don't. You talk to Maggie a lot? 60 00:03:23,367 --> 00:03:27,334 When is the sale final on the church? 61 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,834 Escrow closes Monday, why? 62 00:03:29,901 --> 00:03:33,334 Code blue, pediatrics. Code blue. 63 00:03:38,334 --> 00:03:40,267 I know hospitals are tough for you. 64 00:03:42,100 --> 00:03:44,834 Paul, have you tried legal action? I mean, maybe an injunction would... 65 00:03:44,901 --> 00:03:46,400 With what money? 66 00:03:46,467 --> 00:03:49,234 I thought it was God's plan for me to save the church, Nate. 67 00:03:49,300 --> 00:03:51,601 I was wrong. 68 00:03:51,667 --> 00:03:55,334 But we're going to have one last mass on Sunday, and I plan to make the most of it. 69 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,067 You should be there. 70 00:03:58,133 --> 00:04:02,033 It's not going to be your last mass, Paul. 71 00:04:02,100 --> 00:04:04,634 Nate, what are you going to do? Nate. 72 00:04:07,801 --> 00:04:12,367 I'll just maybe move God's plans along. 73 00:04:15,868 --> 00:04:18,334 - That's St. Nicholas? - Yeah. 74 00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:19,701 Santa Claus has a church? 75 00:04:19,767 --> 00:04:21,167 It's not Santa Claus. 76 00:04:21,234 --> 00:04:23,734 I know this is not our usual kind of case, I realize. 77 00:04:23,801 --> 00:04:26,767 But before you say anything, Paul is an old friend of mine, 78 00:04:26,834 --> 00:04:29,634 and he has helped the poor parishes more than you could ever... 79 00:04:29,701 --> 00:04:32,767 Nate, Nate, Nate. We're taking the case. 80 00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,133 Oh. 81 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:36,300 Yeah. 82 00:04:36,367 --> 00:04:37,534 Oh. 83 00:04:37,601 --> 00:04:41,100 Great. Good. Oh, all right. 84 00:04:41,167 --> 00:04:44,934 Well, this is obviously a strong arm maneuver that's happened here, 85 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:48,434 get rid of the activist priest and the sale closes on Monday. 86 00:04:48,501 --> 00:04:50,200 Do we know anything about who bought the church? 87 00:04:50,267 --> 00:04:52,000 The sign outside said it was sold to Kennedy Corp. 88 00:04:52,067 --> 00:04:55,868 Now, Kennedy Corp is a wholly owned subsidiary of STB International, 89 00:04:55,934 --> 00:04:58,567 which is the parent company of Acai Diversified, 90 00:04:58,634 --> 00:05:01,868 which is a US subsidiary of Kennedy Corp. 91 00:05:01,934 --> 00:05:04,567 That is a lot of trouble to go to for buying an old church. 92 00:05:04,634 --> 00:05:06,767 Yeah. So, Kennedy Corp, that's obviously the front. 93 00:05:06,834 --> 00:05:08,968 Parker, check all the addresses for the realty companies. 94 00:05:09,033 --> 00:05:12,367 Eliot, Hardison, find the local talent that attacked Paul. 95 00:05:12,434 --> 00:05:14,334 He messed up one of their shoulders, if that helps. 96 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,334 No, no. I don't do gangs. Come on. 97 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,968 What? What did he... Get you out in some fresh air, get off the computer. 98 00:05:20,033 --> 00:05:21,601 I rappel. Come on! 99 00:05:21,667 --> 00:05:23,834 Did no one see me rappel? 100 00:05:24,601 --> 00:05:26,267 I heard about it. 101 00:05:48,033 --> 00:05:49,868 You going to be okay? 102 00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:59,534 He's an old friend. I owe him. 103 00:06:04,334 --> 00:06:06,801 You think that we're just going to walk into some random tunnel 104 00:06:06,868 --> 00:06:10,200 and find some cholos just all yoked up. You know? 105 00:06:10,267 --> 00:06:13,501 Hardison. Yo, homes, let me fix my do-rag. 106 00:06:13,567 --> 00:06:14,667 Just... What? 107 00:06:14,734 --> 00:06:15,934 Listen. 108 00:06:17,434 --> 00:06:20,133 Boys, we don't want any trouble. 109 00:06:21,067 --> 00:06:23,467 All right. We just want some answers. 110 00:06:23,534 --> 00:06:25,267 How's this answer? 111 00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:32,701 Gentlemen, I'm asking about one of your colleagues. 112 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:35,133 Somebody who rolled a priest. Who was it? 113 00:06:38,868 --> 00:06:40,701 You seeing this, Hardison? 114 00:06:40,767 --> 00:06:42,601 Yeah. The situation has my attention, yes. 115 00:06:42,667 --> 00:06:44,601 You see, that's why I don't like guns. 116 00:06:44,667 --> 00:06:47,200 They have a specific range of efficacy. 117 00:06:47,267 --> 00:06:49,868 See, most guys make one mistake. 118 00:06:51,334 --> 00:06:53,367 They get too close. 119 00:06:59,901 --> 00:07:04,200 Who rolled a priest? 120 00:07:04,267 --> 00:07:07,868 We didn't beat up no priest. We're not monsters. 121 00:07:13,300 --> 00:07:16,534 Dislocated shoulder's a bitch. 122 00:07:16,601 --> 00:07:18,434 Priest gave him that. 123 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,801 You beat up a priest? 124 00:07:23,334 --> 00:07:24,767 Do you mind? 125 00:07:24,834 --> 00:07:26,267 Be my guest. 126 00:07:29,901 --> 00:07:32,734 You got a long penance ahead of you. 127 00:07:32,801 --> 00:07:35,634 Start by answering the man's questions. 128 00:07:35,701 --> 00:07:37,100 Now! 129 00:07:37,167 --> 00:07:38,267 Who hired you? I don't know. 130 00:07:38,334 --> 00:07:39,901 I got a call on my cell with an offer, 131 00:07:39,968 --> 00:07:42,167 and I called them back after the job was done. 132 00:07:42,234 --> 00:07:45,167 He paid me. That's all I know. I swear. 133 00:07:45,234 --> 00:07:46,868 You got a number? 134 00:07:50,968 --> 00:07:52,167 Can you do something with that? 135 00:07:52,234 --> 00:07:54,634 Seven digits. I could find you on Mars. 136 00:07:54,701 --> 00:07:59,901 Gentlemen, I'll leave you to your internal affairs. Come on. 137 00:07:59,968 --> 00:08:02,868 How about that, man? You see me? 138 00:08:02,934 --> 00:08:04,567 He was injured. 139 00:08:04,634 --> 00:08:07,334 Well, somebody got to fight the injured. Shoot. That's my niche. 140 00:08:10,601 --> 00:08:12,934 When I ran a back trace on the gang banger's car 141 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,634 it routed through this dude's number from a payphone. 142 00:08:15,701 --> 00:08:16,734 So, we got nothing. 143 00:08:16,801 --> 00:08:18,200 Now, hold on. Hold on. 144 00:08:18,267 --> 00:08:20,367 The pay phone is located here. 145 00:08:20,434 --> 00:08:24,234 The Residences at 8th, luxury condos, brought to you by Andrew Grant. 146 00:08:24,300 --> 00:08:27,200 Yeah. I know this guy. He built the Meadow Mall on the west side, 147 00:08:27,267 --> 00:08:30,167 you know, the one with the monorail. 148 00:08:30,234 --> 00:08:32,601 Now, this guy doesn't happen to own any of the shell companies 149 00:08:32,667 --> 00:08:34,367 that bought the church, does he? 150 00:08:34,434 --> 00:08:38,601 Well, I can't prove that, but let's just put it this way. 151 00:08:38,667 --> 00:08:41,667 Those shell companies have their daddy's lying eyes. 152 00:08:41,734 --> 00:08:43,567 All right. What do we know about this Grant guy? 153 00:08:43,634 --> 00:08:45,534 Well, the man's a media whore. 154 00:08:45,601 --> 00:08:48,567 He went through like nine publicists last year alone. 155 00:08:48,634 --> 00:08:51,434 He's cutting the ribbon on this place tomorrow. 156 00:08:51,501 --> 00:08:55,300 Also, Grant survived a helicopter crash last year. 157 00:08:55,367 --> 00:08:57,200 Checked out his pharmacy account. 158 00:08:57,267 --> 00:09:01,634 The man pops anti-anxiety pills like Pez. 159 00:09:01,701 --> 00:09:06,467 Well, publicists are like priests. You gotta tell them all your secrets, 160 00:09:06,534 --> 00:09:09,801 so that's our way in. The question is how. 161 00:09:09,868 --> 00:09:12,367 What are you thinking? 162 00:09:12,434 --> 00:09:18,434 This guy beat up a priest, we're not going easy on him. 163 00:09:18,501 --> 00:09:20,400 I got a dozen reporters waiting for me downstairs, 164 00:09:20,467 --> 00:09:23,167 and the backdrop for my ribbon cutting is scaffolding? 165 00:09:23,234 --> 00:09:24,934 It was a miscommunication. 166 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,868 Isn't that what I pay you for, Tomas? 167 00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:28,534 To communicate? 168 00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:30,267 Stop screwing up. 169 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:35,367 Mr. Grant. Kristi Connelly. 170 00:09:35,434 --> 00:09:36,968 I'm a reporter with The Ledger. 171 00:09:37,033 --> 00:09:39,467 I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions. 172 00:09:39,534 --> 00:09:41,367 Miss Connelly, I don't know how you got up here, 173 00:09:41,434 --> 00:09:43,367 but the press conference is down in the lobby. 174 00:09:43,434 --> 00:09:45,234 It starts in 10 minutes. No, no. I understand. 175 00:09:45,300 --> 00:09:47,801 I just wondered if I could have a moment of your time. Where's the foreman? 176 00:09:47,868 --> 00:09:49,367 Franco! 177 00:09:50,734 --> 00:09:53,033 Willy Wonka's here. 178 00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:55,300 Good. His ride's almost here. 179 00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:04,701 Okay. Showtime. All right. Did you remember the big scissors this time? 180 00:10:04,767 --> 00:10:06,100 Did you remember them? 181 00:10:07,734 --> 00:10:09,901 Oh, my God. Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 182 00:10:09,968 --> 00:10:11,267 So sorry. Watch where you're going. 183 00:10:11,334 --> 00:10:12,834 I didn't mean to do that. That's okay. It's all right. 184 00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,934 Just be more careful next time, baby, okay. 185 00:10:20,167 --> 00:10:22,601 God, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, man. 186 00:10:24,334 --> 00:10:25,801 What the hell are you doing? 187 00:10:25,868 --> 00:10:27,434 I had a little tequila last night, I'm sorry about that. 188 00:10:27,501 --> 00:10:29,601 Why don't you focus, Cuervo? All right? 189 00:10:29,667 --> 00:10:31,167 I feel really bad about that. 190 00:10:31,234 --> 00:10:32,734 You know what? Feel bad, all right? 191 00:10:32,801 --> 00:10:34,367 Oh! Thanks. 192 00:10:59,934 --> 00:11:01,601 I don't believe it! 193 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:07,234 They're fixing up this lift, right? 194 00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:09,434 There's probably a few bugs to work out. 195 00:11:09,501 --> 00:11:12,467 Unacceptable. I'm calling the contractor. 196 00:11:12,534 --> 00:11:14,100 Oh, seriously? No signal. 197 00:11:23,033 --> 00:11:25,868 Okay. That's weird. 198 00:11:27,033 --> 00:11:28,167 Yeah. 199 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,067 I'm not crazy about heights. 200 00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,834 Or enclosed spaces. 201 00:11:49,100 --> 00:11:51,534 What is that you just took? 202 00:11:51,601 --> 00:11:52,767 Xanax. 203 00:11:54,167 --> 00:11:55,934 For my nerves. 204 00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:00,400 Actually, caffeine with a dash of dextroamphetamine. 205 00:12:06,968 --> 00:12:11,501 God, are you getting any air at all? Down there I swear... 206 00:12:11,567 --> 00:12:15,834 God, I think they've sucked all the oxygen out of here to torture me. 207 00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:19,601 It's like the witch's oven in Hansel and Gretel or something. 208 00:12:19,667 --> 00:12:22,667 Just roasting us like a turkey. 209 00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:26,634 You gave him speed? 210 00:12:26,701 --> 00:12:28,501 He beat up a priest. 211 00:12:33,234 --> 00:12:36,267 Get me out of here! 212 00:12:36,334 --> 00:12:41,367 For God's sake. Can anybody hear me? 213 00:12:41,434 --> 00:12:43,501 I'm going to fire every one of you, 214 00:12:43,567 --> 00:12:47,634 every single one of you. You are so fired! 215 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,934 Mr. Grant. Is anybody even listening? 216 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:57,567 Mr. Grant, the press. They're still down there. 217 00:12:57,634 --> 00:13:00,367 We've only been up here for half an hour. 218 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:08,400 Oh, God. Oh, God. They're going to have a field day with me. I mean, look... 219 00:13:08,467 --> 00:13:09,934 Send us home. 220 00:13:14,267 --> 00:13:18,601 See? No, no, no. I can't. I can't. 221 00:13:18,667 --> 00:13:22,634 You gotta stand up and pick me up. Yes. Yes, trust me. Come on. 222 00:13:22,701 --> 00:13:24,734 What? What? Trust me. 223 00:13:24,801 --> 00:13:28,300 Trust me and pick me up. 224 00:13:28,367 --> 00:13:31,300 Someone get me out of this thing! 225 00:13:32,601 --> 00:13:34,667 Someone get these doors open. 226 00:13:34,734 --> 00:13:37,467 Thank God. Oh, thank God. 227 00:13:37,534 --> 00:13:41,767 She fainted. She fainted. Move out of the way, would you? 228 00:13:41,834 --> 00:13:45,634 This woman needs medical attention. Okay. Come on. Come on. 229 00:13:45,701 --> 00:13:49,167 Come on. You'll be okay. Stay with me, sweetheart. Stay with me. 230 00:13:49,234 --> 00:13:51,334 Get some... Would you get... 231 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,334 Okay. Okay, sweetheart. Okay. 232 00:13:56,400 --> 00:14:00,767 You'll be okay. Ms. Connelly, you just got yourself an interview. 233 00:14:00,834 --> 00:14:03,467 Okay, back off. No more pictures, okay? 234 00:14:05,334 --> 00:14:08,767 So, what would you say has been the key to your... 235 00:14:08,834 --> 00:14:11,901 Oh, thanks. Meteoric rise? 236 00:14:11,968 --> 00:14:15,000 An appetite for risk, hard work, bit of luck here and there? 237 00:14:15,067 --> 00:14:16,968 This interview is over. 238 00:14:18,767 --> 00:14:20,167 I'm sorry? 239 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:23,534 Kristi, how did you know what to do in there? 240 00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,434 Oh, that. I'm a reporter. 241 00:14:25,501 --> 00:14:28,234 You have to understand reporters. We're lazy by nature. 242 00:14:28,300 --> 00:14:30,267 All we want is a story, a narrative, 243 00:14:30,334 --> 00:14:32,934 and if you don't like the story they're writing, just give them a new one. 244 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,033 They'll thank you for it. 245 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:37,634 I don't want you to do a story on me. 246 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:39,734 I don't understand. 247 00:14:39,801 --> 00:14:44,133 I want you to make sure everyone else is doing a story on me. 248 00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:46,667 I saw the way you handled the press back there. 249 00:14:46,734 --> 00:14:49,133 I want you to be my new publicist. 250 00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:55,734 I don't know what to say except, when can I start? 251 00:14:56,901 --> 00:14:58,167 How about tomorrow? 252 00:14:58,234 --> 00:15:01,634 Of course, if I'm going to be your publicist, Andy, 253 00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:03,801 I'm going to need complete access to your business. 254 00:15:03,868 --> 00:15:06,767 There can't be any secrets between us, none. 255 00:15:11,834 --> 00:15:13,667 Let me show you something. 256 00:15:16,434 --> 00:15:18,767 He's building another mall on the site of the church. 257 00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:21,868 It's not even a mall. It's a bloody lifestyle center. 258 00:15:21,934 --> 00:15:23,734 Eat, work, shop, play, all in one place. 259 00:15:23,801 --> 00:15:25,400 I don't like this guy. I hate him. 260 00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:28,133 He doesn't want the closing of the church connected to him. 261 00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:31,501 But he's got the city council in his pocket and got the land for a song. 262 00:15:31,567 --> 00:15:33,534 Once this deal closes, he's free and clear. 263 00:15:33,601 --> 00:15:36,434 By the time they break ground on this mall, he'll be untouchable. 264 00:15:36,501 --> 00:15:40,767 Forget St. Nick. We'd be better off with the patron saint of lost causes. 265 00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,501 No, no. He trusts you. You can hook him. 266 00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:44,968 Yeah, I know I can, Nate, but there's no time. 267 00:15:45,033 --> 00:15:48,400 I mean, we need a long con for this job, right? 268 00:15:48,467 --> 00:15:50,701 In three days he owns that church. 269 00:15:50,767 --> 00:15:53,534 Right, so we gotta hit him hard now and indirectly, you know, stall the closing, 270 00:15:53,601 --> 00:15:57,267 and buy enough time to bring him in for a longer game. 271 00:15:57,334 --> 00:15:59,300 You really think he's going to fall for that? 272 00:15:59,367 --> 00:16:01,601 This guy, I gotta be honest with you, 273 00:16:01,667 --> 00:16:04,601 we're going to need a miracle to save this church. 274 00:16:04,667 --> 00:16:07,300 So, let's go steal ourselves a miracle. 275 00:16:17,033 --> 00:16:19,601 So, the Catholic Church defines a miracle as the work of God, 276 00:16:19,667 --> 00:16:25,167 usually through the prayers and intercessions of a saint for some specific purpose, 277 00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:29,200 frequently the conversion of the unbelieving. 278 00:16:29,267 --> 00:16:30,400 How do you know all this stuff? 279 00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,567 I went to school with Father Paul. 280 00:16:34,501 --> 00:16:37,501 To seminary school. 281 00:16:37,567 --> 00:16:41,767 So, you dropped out of priest school to become an insurance cop? 282 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:45,467 Now you're a leader of a band of thieves. Nice. 283 00:16:45,534 --> 00:16:49,067 You're a Catholic who wants to fake a miracle. 284 00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:51,968 I'm pretty sure that puts us in mortal sin territory. 285 00:16:52,033 --> 00:16:53,734 So, what? Now you're religious, too? 286 00:16:53,801 --> 00:16:55,767 No. I'm not denominational, 287 00:16:55,834 --> 00:16:58,701 it's just I never do anything my nana said don't do. 288 00:16:58,767 --> 00:17:01,834 This, what we doing, it just don't seem right. 289 00:17:01,901 --> 00:17:03,567 What doesn't seem right? Let me get this straight. 290 00:17:03,634 --> 00:17:05,400 We're trying to save a church, right? 291 00:17:05,467 --> 00:17:08,467 So, faking a miracle to me seems like the quickest way to do that. 292 00:17:08,534 --> 00:17:12,067 Even Andrew Grant's not going to build a mall on a holy site. 293 00:17:12,133 --> 00:17:14,434 Right. So, we need three things. We need a miracle, 294 00:17:14,501 --> 00:17:17,434 we need publicity, and we need to keep Father Paul out of the way. 295 00:17:17,501 --> 00:17:21,434 He can't be involved in this at all. 296 00:17:21,501 --> 00:17:26,167 Reporters follow Grant around in packs. Let's use him as bait. 297 00:17:26,234 --> 00:17:28,734 Use his own publicity to wreck his project. 298 00:17:30,901 --> 00:17:32,734 It's elegant. 299 00:17:32,801 --> 00:17:35,901 Okay. Parker, I need you to go to the hospital 300 00:17:35,968 --> 00:17:38,534 and keep Father Paul there, no matter what, up to a point. 301 00:17:38,601 --> 00:17:40,133 But keep him in the hospital. 302 00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,534 Eliot, you're the retrieval specialist. Give Hardison anything he needs. 303 00:17:42,601 --> 00:17:44,667 Long as I don't have to do anything immoral. 304 00:17:44,734 --> 00:17:49,467 No, absolutely not. No. Just need you to figure out how to fake a miracle. 305 00:17:53,334 --> 00:17:55,133 We all going to hell. 306 00:17:58,634 --> 00:18:00,400 You know I'm getting out of here in a couple of hours. 307 00:18:00,467 --> 00:18:03,934 Yeah. It's just a few last tests to be on the safe side. 308 00:18:14,267 --> 00:18:15,868 You leak this? 309 00:18:15,934 --> 00:18:16,901 They're calling for his head. 310 00:18:16,968 --> 00:18:20,267 It's a PR nightmare. Trust me. 311 00:18:20,334 --> 00:18:26,234 He's rattled, vulnerable, just right for me to kiss and make boo boo better. 312 00:18:29,534 --> 00:18:32,234 He'll be a minute. It's busy today. 313 00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:36,968 Certainly is. So, what's your take on all of this? 314 00:18:37,033 --> 00:18:40,834 The new mall? I mean, lifestyle center? 315 00:18:40,901 --> 00:18:43,167 We're building right around where I grew up. 316 00:18:43,234 --> 00:18:45,767 I figured it'd sweep out the gangs. 317 00:18:45,834 --> 00:18:48,033 Good on you. You're a company man. 318 00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:50,000 Yes, ma'am. Thank you for your opinion. 319 00:18:50,067 --> 00:18:54,801 Okay. I just received a threatening phone call from a nun. 320 00:18:54,868 --> 00:18:57,868 Well, Mr. Grant, the problem is the reporters have their story. 321 00:18:57,934 --> 00:18:59,868 Yeah. Andrew Grant, neighborhood wrecker. 322 00:18:59,934 --> 00:19:01,033 Like there's even a neighborhood there. 323 00:19:01,100 --> 00:19:05,000 It's a bunch of losers and burnt out buildings. 324 00:19:05,067 --> 00:19:07,067 The problem is they have the wrong story. 325 00:19:07,133 --> 00:19:09,734 And what do we do when reporters have the wrong story? 326 00:19:09,801 --> 00:19:11,601 Give 'em a new one. 327 00:19:11,667 --> 00:19:14,067 You need to take control of this, make an official announcement. 328 00:19:14,133 --> 00:19:15,501 Give them the other story. 329 00:19:15,567 --> 00:19:16,868 Yeah, sure, of course. 330 00:19:16,934 --> 00:19:19,767 The church. Do it at the church. 331 00:19:19,834 --> 00:19:23,133 The church's doors are closing, boo hoo. 332 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:26,400 But you're opening new doors, opportunity for all. 333 00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:30,400 Yes. 334 00:19:30,467 --> 00:19:33,501 Yes. Tomas, we'll make the official announcement down on First. 335 00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:34,934 Call every reporter in the city. 336 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,033 Wonderful, I'll set it up. 337 00:19:36,100 --> 00:19:37,767 Come on. Tomas, where are you? Come on. 338 00:19:37,834 --> 00:19:40,100 We gotta get going. Get on the phone. What are you doing? Tomas! 339 00:19:40,167 --> 00:19:42,734 I'm coming, Mr. Grant. 340 00:19:42,801 --> 00:19:46,200 All right, Father. I got your test results right here. Hmm. 341 00:19:46,267 --> 00:19:50,067 High cholesterol, elevated sed rate 342 00:19:50,133 --> 00:19:52,167 and it looks like you're pregnant. 343 00:19:52,234 --> 00:19:54,367 I'm going to need you to stick around and retest. 344 00:20:00,234 --> 00:20:03,234 Behold, I've made the statues multiply. 345 00:20:03,300 --> 00:20:06,067 Well, I gotta say that looks pretty good, Hardison. 346 00:20:06,133 --> 00:20:09,400 I mean... Yeah. It's a... 347 00:20:13,100 --> 00:20:15,567 Polystyrene? Amongst other things. 348 00:20:15,634 --> 00:20:17,033 Uh-huh. Just don't eat it. 349 00:20:17,767 --> 00:20:19,667 Or breathe near it. 350 00:20:25,133 --> 00:20:28,434 All right. Show us what you got. 351 00:20:28,501 --> 00:20:31,400 Test subject number one. 352 00:20:36,634 --> 00:20:41,601 No. I said bleeding tears, not bleeding ears. 353 00:20:41,667 --> 00:20:43,434 All right, look, look, look, man. 354 00:20:43,501 --> 00:20:46,434 You lucky on this deadline I didn't give you a baking soda volcano. 355 00:20:46,501 --> 00:20:48,534 Yeah, but this is... 356 00:20:48,601 --> 00:20:51,033 Okay. What else you got? 357 00:20:51,100 --> 00:20:52,801 That's ridiculous. 358 00:20:56,434 --> 00:20:58,033 Stigmata paintball gun. 359 00:20:58,100 --> 00:20:59,501 What? No, no, no. No. 360 00:20:59,567 --> 00:21:00,634 Yeah. Yeah. 361 00:21:00,701 --> 00:21:02,033 How does that work? 362 00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:04,267 Oh, I've been practicing. Check me out. 363 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:19,300 Okay, Hardison, could you just make the statue cry without melting St. Nick's head? 364 00:21:20,334 --> 00:21:21,601 Don't melt Santa. 365 00:21:21,667 --> 00:21:23,467 It's not Santa. 366 00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:28,934 What, are you 10 feet from there? How can you miss that? You're standing right here. 367 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:31,300 Everybody can't be Eliot. Shut up. Shut up. Unbelievable. 368 00:21:38,567 --> 00:21:40,367 Grant lined up? 369 00:21:40,434 --> 00:21:44,200 Uh-huh. Yeah. He'll be there, with the press. 370 00:21:50,501 --> 00:21:54,267 Oh, um, I've been meaning to ask you. 371 00:21:54,334 --> 00:21:57,334 How was it, you know, talking to Maggie again? 372 00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:02,000 Good, yeah. Strange, but good. 373 00:22:02,067 --> 00:22:04,400 Yeah. Yeah. 374 00:22:06,133 --> 00:22:08,133 Yeah, I still feel, uh... 375 00:22:09,167 --> 00:22:12,701 What? Guilty about Sam? 376 00:22:12,767 --> 00:22:15,734 No, no, not that. Well, yeah, I mean... 377 00:22:18,734 --> 00:22:21,567 Yeah, and other things. Other things. But... 378 00:22:27,067 --> 00:22:28,501 You never cheated on her, Nate. 379 00:22:28,567 --> 00:22:29,767 I know. 380 00:22:31,067 --> 00:22:32,300 I know. 381 00:22:33,067 --> 00:22:34,901 Tempted. 382 00:22:34,968 --> 00:22:37,334 No. No, you weren't. I was. 383 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:39,501 Not really. 384 00:22:39,567 --> 00:22:42,300 You've always been the good guy. 385 00:22:42,367 --> 00:22:44,801 That's, you know, what made it fun. 386 00:22:44,868 --> 00:22:49,200 Well, a part of what made it fun between us back then. 387 00:22:50,501 --> 00:22:52,100 Back then, yeah. 388 00:22:52,801 --> 00:22:56,100 And what about now? 389 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,501 I don't know. What about now? 390 00:23:00,567 --> 00:23:03,634 That's what we have to figure out. 391 00:23:03,701 --> 00:23:06,601 By we, I mean, you, of course. 392 00:23:08,234 --> 00:23:11,067 Of course. Of course. 393 00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:18,067 Uh, just don't take too long. 394 00:23:26,767 --> 00:23:31,701 A lifestyle center to revitalize the life of this neighborhood. 395 00:23:31,767 --> 00:23:35,601 A pulsing heart of opportunity and commerce in the center of... 396 00:23:35,667 --> 00:23:40,667 Everybody come quickly. You have to see this. It's a miracle. 397 00:23:48,067 --> 00:23:49,601 It's a miracle. 398 00:23:50,567 --> 00:23:52,000 It's a miracle. 399 00:24:01,100 --> 00:24:02,801 Not too bad. 400 00:24:02,868 --> 00:24:05,100 It was nothing really. It's just basic chemistry. 401 00:24:05,167 --> 00:24:08,801 See, an oil polymer that reacts with a secondary chemical in the candles, 402 00:24:08,868 --> 00:24:12,567 no candle smoke, absolutely no evidence. Light a candle. 403 00:24:12,634 --> 00:24:15,801 The local news will pick up the event. 404 00:24:15,868 --> 00:24:18,367 Grant will crawl back into his hole for a while, 405 00:24:18,434 --> 00:24:23,133 and well, at least for the time being, it will stay open to the... 406 00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:24,300 Whoa! 407 00:24:27,901 --> 00:24:30,534 Whoa! That's a lot of public. 408 00:24:30,601 --> 00:24:33,901 I'm very good. Yeah. A little too good. 409 00:24:42,100 --> 00:24:43,868 What did we just do? 410 00:24:57,734 --> 00:25:00,400 A weeping statue of St. Nick is on YouTube. 411 00:25:00,467 --> 00:25:02,067 Good, this church will never shut down. 412 00:25:02,133 --> 00:25:03,901 Oh! There's just so many people here. 413 00:25:03,968 --> 00:25:06,200 I mean, what if they find out it's a... 414 00:25:06,267 --> 00:25:07,400 Fake? 415 00:25:07,467 --> 00:25:11,601 Hellfire, damnation, etcetera. You know what? 416 00:25:11,667 --> 00:25:15,100 I'm going to step over here so when the good Lord goes down on all y'all, 417 00:25:15,167 --> 00:25:16,400 I don't get hit by the lightning. 418 00:25:16,467 --> 00:25:18,234 Wasn't Zeus the one with the lightning? 419 00:25:18,300 --> 00:25:20,601 Guys, guys, this is still a big win. 420 00:25:20,667 --> 00:25:23,567 Sophie, find out where Grant is and make sure that he's... 421 00:25:23,634 --> 00:25:24,667 What did you do? 422 00:25:24,734 --> 00:25:26,934 What do you mean? 423 00:25:30,767 --> 00:25:32,868 What? You don't believe in miracles? 424 00:25:32,934 --> 00:25:35,534 The word "miracle" does not appear anywhere in the Old or New Testaments. 425 00:25:35,601 --> 00:25:38,100 What about the wedding at Canaan, huh? What about Lazarus? 426 00:25:38,167 --> 00:25:39,868 Please tell me you had nothing to do with this. 427 00:25:39,934 --> 00:25:42,534 I had nothing to do with this. 428 00:25:42,601 --> 00:25:48,701 Nate, you're lying to me, right to my face, in church. 429 00:25:48,767 --> 00:25:50,367 There's a fake miracle in my church. 430 00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,300 You know, there's a reason you didn't become a priest. 431 00:25:56,367 --> 00:25:58,200 I do what I can. 432 00:25:58,267 --> 00:26:02,167 You can't play God, Nate. Just tell me what's going on and we'll try to fix it. 433 00:26:02,234 --> 00:26:03,901 Paul, listen to me. 434 00:26:03,968 --> 00:26:06,734 For your own good, I can't tell you what's going on here. 435 00:26:06,801 --> 00:26:11,734 But I can tell you that I... That I got it covered. 436 00:26:15,601 --> 00:26:19,067 They're in spin mode. It's a mess. 437 00:26:19,133 --> 00:26:23,334 I'm going to put a nail in his coffin right now. 438 00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:27,234 Well, make it 10. I don't want that son of a bitch crawling out. 439 00:26:34,133 --> 00:26:39,501 So, St. Nicholas, a miracle. 440 00:26:40,434 --> 00:26:42,133 Obviously we can't... 441 00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:43,033 Yeah, I know. I've been up all night with this. 442 00:26:43,100 --> 00:26:45,367 I figured as much. 443 00:26:45,434 --> 00:26:47,033 I do have a spin on it. 444 00:26:47,100 --> 00:26:50,467 No, no, no. Forget it. I've killed the American town. 445 00:26:50,534 --> 00:26:54,334 This miracle, it gave me a real crisis of conscience. 446 00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:58,901 Excellent. Yeah, that's good. We can work with that. 447 00:26:58,968 --> 00:27:01,734 I looked into my heart, I paced, I cried. 448 00:27:02,968 --> 00:27:06,100 But by dawn, I had my answer. 449 00:27:08,834 --> 00:27:10,267 Bibletopia! 450 00:27:13,300 --> 00:27:15,501 It's a theme park? Uh-uh. 451 00:27:15,567 --> 00:27:18,868 Lifestyle and recreation center. Here, let me give you the tour. 452 00:27:18,934 --> 00:27:22,501 So, the church stays, at least the statue stays 453 00:27:22,567 --> 00:27:25,234 and maybe that one wall with the stained glass, but the rest, gone. 454 00:27:25,300 --> 00:27:28,501 Now, flanking the statue, two food courts. 455 00:27:28,567 --> 00:27:32,334 So, the original pews, they're now outdoors for mealtime seating, 456 00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:33,834 holy contemplation, whatever. 457 00:27:33,901 --> 00:27:36,801 Shops aplenty on the perimeter, but this, 458 00:27:36,868 --> 00:27:39,968 there will be a sea, an actual sea 459 00:27:40,033 --> 00:27:43,934 surrounding the park that will part every 30 minutes. 460 00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:46,601 Huh? And then while people are waiting to come in, 461 00:27:46,667 --> 00:27:51,400 they can enjoy previews, food and souvenirs at the Tears of St. Nick Cafe. 462 00:27:51,467 --> 00:27:54,701 Come to pray, stay to shop. 463 00:27:54,767 --> 00:27:58,033 We also got this. St. Nicholas bobble heads. 464 00:28:01,167 --> 00:28:02,634 There you go. 465 00:28:06,067 --> 00:28:07,667 You're serious about this? 466 00:28:09,567 --> 00:28:13,033 Hey, come on, Kristi, you and I both know this is not a real miracle. 467 00:28:13,100 --> 00:28:16,067 A, because miracles don't exist, and two, because this pain-in-the-ass priest 468 00:28:16,133 --> 00:28:17,901 will do anything to keep his church open. 469 00:28:17,968 --> 00:28:20,133 But, hey, I owe him a debt. 470 00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:25,033 I mean, I never would have thought of Bibletopia without his divine intervention. 471 00:28:25,100 --> 00:28:28,667 This stupid priest, he's going to make me millions. 472 00:28:33,033 --> 00:28:35,601 Bibletopia? The man cannot be stopped. 473 00:28:35,667 --> 00:28:37,801 It's like everything we throw at him just makes him stronger. 474 00:28:37,868 --> 00:28:41,501 Kind of admire him, though, I mean, my nephew would like Bibletopia. 475 00:28:41,567 --> 00:28:44,801 No, no. See, this is what happens when you mess with God. 476 00:28:44,868 --> 00:28:48,033 He raises up your enemies with his right hand, and then he smites you with his left. 477 00:28:48,100 --> 00:28:50,067 No, no, no, no. We can use this. 478 00:28:50,133 --> 00:28:52,067 Just give me a second to... I just need... 479 00:28:57,434 --> 00:28:59,234 Apostolic visitation. 480 00:29:00,033 --> 00:29:01,434 Come again? 481 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:04,634 It's the Vatican. 482 00:29:10,968 --> 00:29:13,367 What? 483 00:29:13,434 --> 00:29:17,300 Apostolic visitation, it's like the Pope's, you know, CSI. 484 00:29:17,367 --> 00:29:18,834 They come, they investigate a miracle. 485 00:29:18,901 --> 00:29:20,968 They determine whether it's real or a hoax. 486 00:29:21,033 --> 00:29:23,234 If they find out the truth they're going to close this church down 487 00:29:23,300 --> 00:29:25,534 and blame Father Paul for fraud. 488 00:29:25,601 --> 00:29:29,334 I don't like this, Nate. No. I mean, even Grant, okay, he was hooked. 489 00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:32,000 Ordinarily we'd have him under control by now. And we'll get around to him. 490 00:29:32,067 --> 00:29:34,334 We'll get around to him. We'll save the church and we'll take out Grant. 491 00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:38,801 You screwed up. You're going to have to undo your own con. 492 00:29:45,067 --> 00:29:46,934 Gentlemen. 493 00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,234 Father, Father! Excuse... I'm having just big spiritual crisis. 494 00:29:50,300 --> 00:29:52,868 You guys can understand more than anybody. I need to talk to you right now. 495 00:29:52,934 --> 00:29:54,667 You're the only one who can... 496 00:29:54,734 --> 00:29:56,534 Listen, I hope you weren't gonna do what I know you were just about to do. 497 00:29:56,601 --> 00:30:00,033 Tell the truth? You bet I was. Nate, no more lies. 498 00:30:00,100 --> 00:30:02,934 The Vatican's here. You and I both know what that means. 499 00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:05,901 Yeah. Break out the Grappa. 500 00:30:05,968 --> 00:30:07,634 Does my getting defrocked amuse you? 501 00:30:07,701 --> 00:30:11,067 No. Listen. Listen. Just let me explain this to you, okay? 502 00:30:11,133 --> 00:30:14,901 All right. Just... This is... In here. 503 00:30:14,968 --> 00:30:18,234 Oh. There's always a loophole with you. 504 00:30:18,300 --> 00:30:19,901 That's my side. 505 00:30:24,501 --> 00:30:29,100 How do you do, Father? I was wondering if I could introduce you... 506 00:30:31,334 --> 00:30:33,200 I get immunity, of course. 507 00:30:33,267 --> 00:30:36,033 Nothing I say can be repeated to anyone, nor is it admissible in a court of law. 508 00:30:36,100 --> 00:30:37,767 Start it right. 509 00:30:37,834 --> 00:30:39,501 So, the statue... 510 00:30:40,234 --> 00:30:42,033 Bless me, Father... 511 00:30:43,601 --> 00:30:45,868 Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been... 512 00:30:45,934 --> 00:30:50,767 Two years, three months, 15 days since my last confession. 513 00:30:53,901 --> 00:30:55,767 I was at the funeral. 514 00:30:58,968 --> 00:31:01,234 So, the statue, we faked the miracle. 515 00:31:01,300 --> 00:31:02,801 I know. 516 00:31:02,868 --> 00:31:05,734 Now, I had no idea that it would get as much attention as... 517 00:31:05,801 --> 00:31:08,033 And Grant, that he would turn around 518 00:31:08,100 --> 00:31:10,267 and he would try to profit from it. 519 00:31:10,334 --> 00:31:16,000 I have committed a string of selfish and hurtful acts, Father. 520 00:31:17,667 --> 00:31:19,901 Wrong acts, right reasons. 521 00:31:19,968 --> 00:31:23,133 Oh, the ends justify the means. Is that it, Nate? Is that it? 522 00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:26,534 The details. God looks at how we do a thing and he judges. 523 00:31:26,601 --> 00:31:28,334 Hey, I'm out here helping people, I mean... 524 00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:30,033 Are you? Or are you trying to kill yourself, 525 00:31:30,100 --> 00:31:33,167 maybe take a couple of bad guys down with you? 526 00:31:35,934 --> 00:31:38,734 I am trying to save your damn church. 527 00:31:38,801 --> 00:31:40,667 Save my church. 528 00:31:40,734 --> 00:31:43,767 You faked a miracle. My parishioners, my flock, my church, 529 00:31:43,834 --> 00:31:45,868 they believed in that miracle. 530 00:31:45,934 --> 00:31:49,167 And now you are ripping out that faith and replacing it with a lie. 531 00:31:49,234 --> 00:31:52,067 Maybe I'm not here to save this church, Nate. 532 00:31:52,133 --> 00:31:55,067 Maybe I need to lose this church to save you. 533 00:32:03,033 --> 00:32:04,767 Go and sin no more. 534 00:32:19,067 --> 00:32:20,534 Excuse me. 535 00:32:23,567 --> 00:32:28,601 Andy, there's a bit of trouble, nothing alarming, it's just... 536 00:32:30,267 --> 00:32:31,834 The Vatican's here. 537 00:32:31,901 --> 00:32:34,901 I know. Isn't it great? Great? 538 00:32:34,968 --> 00:32:37,701 If they think it's real, we go forward with Bibletopia. 539 00:32:37,767 --> 00:32:42,868 If they expose it, well, then I get good press for closing this fraud parish. 540 00:32:42,934 --> 00:32:46,567 You see, when people say controversy, I hear attention. 541 00:32:49,100 --> 00:32:52,100 Andy, you are shameless. 542 00:32:53,834 --> 00:32:56,534 Oh, God, you get me so well. 543 00:32:56,601 --> 00:32:59,400 Hey, come on, get me a picture with these guys. 544 00:33:01,033 --> 00:33:03,334 Padre, how are you? Nice to meet you. Andrew Grant. 545 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:04,767 It's a real pleasure to have you here. 546 00:33:04,834 --> 00:33:07,100 This is my church, hopefully it will be my church someday soon. 547 00:33:07,167 --> 00:33:09,701 It's good to have you here. Was your flight over okay? 548 00:33:09,767 --> 00:33:11,300 Oh, it's monsignor. I'm sorry. 549 00:33:11,367 --> 00:33:13,200 I don't know the proper titles for these things. 550 00:33:13,267 --> 00:33:16,467 Hey, look. Would you mind if I take a photograph with you guys? 551 00:33:16,534 --> 00:33:19,934 It'll be just for my own personal wall of fame that I have at my office. 552 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,467 I'm going to confession. 553 00:33:22,534 --> 00:33:26,000 Okay, say... What do we call it? Rosary. 554 00:33:26,067 --> 00:33:27,901 There it is. That's what it is. 555 00:33:27,968 --> 00:33:29,567 Right behind you. 556 00:33:29,634 --> 00:33:30,767 That's great. 557 00:33:45,133 --> 00:33:48,267 Soon as that van full of Vatican CSI equipment gets here we're screwed. 558 00:33:48,334 --> 00:33:50,667 That's what I was trying to say, but you guys wouldn't let me talk 559 00:33:50,734 --> 00:33:52,534 while we were all in that closet. 560 00:33:52,601 --> 00:33:55,267 If we leave it here they're going to find out the statue isn't really crying 561 00:33:55,334 --> 00:33:57,734 and blame Father Paul for fraud. 562 00:33:57,801 --> 00:34:02,567 Sophie, if we steal the statue he's going to get blamed for covering up a fraud. 563 00:34:06,901 --> 00:34:08,434 This ain't funny. 564 00:34:08,501 --> 00:34:10,968 As soon as they run a scanner or a pH stick over that statue 565 00:34:11,033 --> 00:34:12,667 they're going see those aren't real tears. 566 00:34:12,734 --> 00:34:16,367 You're right. It's only a matter of time. 567 00:34:16,434 --> 00:34:18,634 You know, Father Paul, he can't help but tell the truth 568 00:34:18,701 --> 00:34:20,567 and he's going to flip on us. 569 00:34:20,634 --> 00:34:22,434 I hope this is the part where you suggest prayer. 570 00:34:22,501 --> 00:34:26,834 No. The weeping statue of St. Nicholas is not going to be stolen. 571 00:34:26,901 --> 00:34:31,767 It's going to miraculously disappear in the middle of tomorrow's mass. 572 00:34:31,834 --> 00:34:32,834 I'm sorry? 573 00:34:32,901 --> 00:34:34,834 In front of the priests, 574 00:34:34,901 --> 00:34:37,100 the Vatican, the entire congregation. 575 00:34:37,167 --> 00:34:39,934 Have you learned nothing, Nate? 576 00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:41,801 How much does the statue weigh? 577 00:34:41,868 --> 00:34:43,167 About 900 pounds. 578 00:34:43,234 --> 00:34:44,400 Good. 579 00:34:47,834 --> 00:34:49,934 I am so sorry, Nana. 580 00:34:50,734 --> 00:34:51,968 The Lord be with you. 581 00:34:52,033 --> 00:34:53,567 Also with you. 582 00:34:53,634 --> 00:34:56,267 A reading from the Gospel according to Luke. 583 00:34:56,334 --> 00:34:58,234 Glory to you, oh, Lord. 584 00:34:58,300 --> 00:35:02,467 A man had a fig tree in his vineyard, but it did not bear fruit, 585 00:35:02,534 --> 00:35:04,567 so he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 586 00:35:04,634 --> 00:35:07,534 "For three years, I've been looking for fruit on this tree, 587 00:35:07,601 --> 00:35:10,601 "and for three years I've found nothing. 588 00:35:10,667 --> 00:35:13,400 "It's a waste of my land. Cut it down." 589 00:35:13,467 --> 00:35:17,667 "Sir," the worker replied, "leave it alone for one more year. 590 00:35:17,734 --> 00:35:20,534 "Let me dig around it and fertilize it. 591 00:35:20,601 --> 00:35:24,067 "If it bears fruit next year, all is well. 592 00:35:24,133 --> 00:35:26,634 "If not, then cut it down." 593 00:35:28,601 --> 00:35:31,267 - The gospel of the Lord. - Praise the Lord... 594 00:35:32,467 --> 00:35:35,667 Repent or perish! 595 00:35:38,734 --> 00:35:41,601 That's Luke 13. 596 00:35:41,667 --> 00:35:46,467 Tough to swallow, huh? But like all parables, this one's open to interpretation. 597 00:35:47,834 --> 00:35:51,267 Was the worker just being lazy, stalling? 598 00:35:51,334 --> 00:35:55,868 I'll get to it, boss, next year, manana. 599 00:35:57,467 --> 00:36:02,133 Or did the worker have a secret? 600 00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:07,133 A secret that only our faith sustains us over time. 601 00:36:08,901 --> 00:36:12,934 The owner doesn't have his hands in the soil. 602 00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:18,834 Only the worker is there every day in the dirt with the tree. 603 00:36:18,901 --> 00:36:23,667 He has faith in his skill and faith that God will support that skill, 604 00:36:23,734 --> 00:36:27,434 and maybe in a year's time the tree will bear fruit. 605 00:36:29,434 --> 00:36:32,100 He doesn't look for the easy way out. 606 00:36:32,167 --> 00:36:36,000 He doesn't say, "Oh, why would the Lord do this to me? 607 00:36:36,067 --> 00:36:41,801 "If only he would give me a sign. If only he'd give us a miracle." 608 00:36:44,701 --> 00:36:47,968 But the worker doesn't ask for a miracle. 609 00:36:48,033 --> 00:36:51,434 He has faith in himself, and faith in God, 610 00:36:51,501 --> 00:36:53,734 and he only asks for time. 611 00:36:58,167 --> 00:37:00,200 Let us proclaim our faith. 612 00:37:02,834 --> 00:37:06,200 We believe in one God, the Father, the Almighty, 613 00:37:06,267 --> 00:37:07,934 the maker of heaven and earth, 614 00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,234 of all that is seen and unseen. 615 00:37:10,300 --> 00:37:12,801 We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ, 616 00:37:12,868 --> 00:37:15,067 the only son of God, 617 00:37:15,133 --> 00:37:17,033 eternally begotten of the Father, 618 00:37:17,100 --> 00:37:21,167 God from God, Light from Light, true God from true God, 619 00:37:21,234 --> 00:37:24,334 begotten, not made, one in Being with the Father. 620 00:37:32,334 --> 00:37:34,934 All right. Let's do it. 621 00:37:37,100 --> 00:37:38,234 Whoa! 622 00:37:39,968 --> 00:37:42,968 For us men, for our salvation. 623 00:37:49,501 --> 00:37:53,200 I saw what happened. An angel took it away. 624 00:38:01,267 --> 00:38:04,334 Calm down, people. That's not what's happening. 625 00:38:08,100 --> 00:38:09,767 I know what's going on here. 626 00:38:16,934 --> 00:38:21,100 There is no miracle. Somebody stole the statue, 627 00:38:22,601 --> 00:38:24,400 and I know who it is. 628 00:38:26,767 --> 00:38:29,267 Andrew Grant. 629 00:38:29,334 --> 00:38:31,868 Hey, that's the guy that bought the church. That's not my van. 630 00:38:31,934 --> 00:38:36,033 What kind of monster fakes a miracle for a profit? You sicken me. 631 00:38:36,100 --> 00:38:38,834 Thief! GRANT: That priest is desperate. 632 00:38:38,901 --> 00:38:43,567 He hid the statue in the van. He forged the registration papers to frame me. 633 00:38:43,634 --> 00:38:45,200 We don't believe you. 634 00:38:45,267 --> 00:38:47,000 Look, look, look. Right here. See? 635 00:38:47,067 --> 00:38:49,601 My assistant, he was with me the whole time. 636 00:38:49,667 --> 00:38:52,000 Okay, now, look. We bought this property. 637 00:38:52,067 --> 00:38:54,734 We're going to fix up the neighborhood, right? 638 00:38:54,801 --> 00:38:55,868 No. 639 00:38:56,934 --> 00:38:57,968 No? 640 00:38:58,033 --> 00:38:59,934 No! 641 00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:03,901 He got the land under this church the same way he got the rest of the neighborhood, 642 00:39:03,968 --> 00:39:09,667 the same way he gets all of his properties, by bribery, intimidation and violence. 643 00:39:09,734 --> 00:39:16,634 Andrew Grant sent a bunch of thugs to beat up Father Paul. 644 00:39:16,701 --> 00:39:20,534 If I go to the police with what I have I could put him in jail. 645 00:39:21,701 --> 00:39:24,033 And me, too, probably. 646 00:39:24,100 --> 00:39:28,000 Father, what can I do to make things right? 647 00:39:32,801 --> 00:39:34,734 You have to do the right thing. 648 00:39:39,901 --> 00:39:42,467 You're gonna have to think very hard about this. 649 00:39:42,534 --> 00:39:46,667 We're going to have a very long discussion. Okay. Great, good. 650 00:39:46,734 --> 00:39:48,467 Cops got here fast. 651 00:39:48,534 --> 00:39:53,167 It's almost as if an investigative journalist called them with a tip off. 652 00:39:53,234 --> 00:39:56,334 Kristi, save me, huh? You can spin this, right? 653 00:39:56,400 --> 00:40:01,234 Instead of felony, maybe soften it to controversy. 654 00:40:01,300 --> 00:40:05,901 You know, when you say controversy, I always hear attention. 655 00:40:11,868 --> 00:40:14,000 Are you even British? 656 00:40:16,100 --> 00:40:18,834 I gotta tell her something. I gotta talk to her. 657 00:40:27,868 --> 00:40:29,100 You used me. 658 00:40:29,167 --> 00:40:32,033 Yeah, well, you used me, too. 659 00:40:32,100 --> 00:40:33,868 Broke the seal of the confessional, 660 00:40:33,934 --> 00:40:36,968 told everyone the statue was a fake. 661 00:40:37,033 --> 00:40:39,300 To save the faith of my parish. 662 00:40:40,968 --> 00:40:43,634 Wrong act, right reasons. 663 00:40:43,701 --> 00:40:46,067 End justify the means, Father? 664 00:40:47,300 --> 00:40:49,467 I'll count myself blessed and take my miracle. 665 00:40:49,534 --> 00:40:52,334 Ah, but there was no miracle. 666 00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:56,267 Nate, five thieves saved my church. 667 00:41:00,033 --> 00:41:02,334 It was good to see you, Paul. 668 00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:05,067 You better plan on being there next Sunday. 669 00:41:05,133 --> 00:41:07,868 I've got a great sermon on making amends. 670 00:41:10,767 --> 00:41:13,200 We'll see. 671 00:41:13,267 --> 00:41:16,501 You'll be back. I have faith in you. 672 00:42:09,501 --> 00:42:11,934 Look at that, we saved the church. 673 00:42:13,868 --> 00:42:18,067 It's like Christmas. See, I told you St. Nicholas was Santa Claus. 674 00:42:18,133 --> 00:42:19,868 He's not, Parker. 675 00:42:19,934 --> 00:42:21,834 Who is he then? 676 00:42:21,901 --> 00:42:23,400 St. Nicholas? 677 00:42:26,901 --> 00:42:29,133 Is the patron saint of thieves. 51177

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