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1
00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:05,000
Cheers is filmedbefore a live studio audience.
2
00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:07,900
Sam.
3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:10,100
Sorry, they were out of beer
nuts and pretzels at the store,
4
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:12,900
but guess what I got?
5
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,000
Choco Puffs.
6
00:00:15,100 --> 00:00:17,300
Hey-hey.
Hey, all right.
7
00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:18,700
Haven't had these
since I was a kid.
8
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:20,100
CLIFF:
Hey, look at this.
9
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:24,100
Uh, "90% real sugar,
ten percent animal fat."
10
00:00:24,100 --> 00:00:27,000
God bless America, huh?
11
00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:30,800
I always liked eating mine
straight from the box.
12
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,100
They still have prizes
in these things?
13
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,400
Boy, I hope so.
14
00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:34,900
I remember when
I was a kid,
15
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:37,600
I got one of those lick-
and-stick tattoo books.
16
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:39,500
Never wore them though.
17
00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:40,700
Felt pretty silly, huh?
18
00:00:40,700 --> 00:00:44,300
No, I'm just waiting
for a special occasion.
19
00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:47,200
Yep, I got a prize.
20
00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:49,200
Me, too. Dumb BB game.
21
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:51,200
Yeah, I got one of those
cheap plastic rings.
22
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,100
Oh, great, another
tattoo book.
23
00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:56,200
(coughs)
24
00:00:56,300 --> 00:00:57,200
Let's see what
Cliffie got.
25
00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:58,700
(coughs)
26
00:00:58,800 --> 00:01:01,000
Hey, Cliffie got skunked.
27
00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,400
(laughing)
28
00:01:02,500 --> 00:01:04,900
(coughing, whistling)
29
00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:12,100
(coughing, whistling)
30
00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:16,500
Oh, Mr. Clavin
got the whistle.
31
00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:20,300
(coughing, whistling)
32
00:01:20,300 --> 00:01:22,200
(theme song begins)
33
00:01:24,300 --> 00:01:26,600
� Making your way
in the world today �
34
00:01:26,700 --> 00:01:29,900
� Takes everything you've got �
35
00:01:29,900 --> 00:01:32,500
� Taking a break
from all your worries �
36
00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:36,000
� Sure would help a lot
37
00:01:36,100 --> 00:01:39,900
� Wouldn't you like
to get away? �
38
00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:43,400
� Sometimes you want to go
39
00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:47,900
� Where everybody
knows your name �
40
00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:53,800
� And they're always
glad you came �
41
00:01:53,900 --> 00:01:56,100
� You wanna be
where you can see �
42
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,700
� Our troubles
are all the same �
43
00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:03,000
� You wanna be where
everybody knows your name �
44
00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:06,100
� You wanna go
where people know �
45
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:09,400
� People are all the same
46
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:14,000
� You wanna go where
everybody knows your name. �
47
00:02:32,100 --> 00:02:33,200
How's your throat
doing there, Cliffie?
48
00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:34,300
It's still a little sore, Sam.
49
00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:35,600
Oh, well,
50
00:02:35,700 --> 00:02:37,500
here's something we
used to do in my family.
51
00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:39,900
Ah! Ah!
52
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,700
You did that for sore throats?
53
00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:43,500
No.
54
00:02:48,900 --> 00:02:50,200
Sam...
55
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,400
What...?
56
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:54,500
My hatcheck girl is missing
from her post.
57
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:56,500
You haven't perchance seen her?
58
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,100
What's that supposed to mean?
Every time something goes wrong
59
00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,600
in your restaurant
it's my fault?
60
00:02:59,700 --> 00:03:01,100
Like I'm the one who's supposed
to keep track
61
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:02,400
of all your employees?
62
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,300
You know,
that really ticks me off.
63
00:03:04,300 --> 00:03:08,400
Sam, I can't get the sofa bed
to fold back up.
64
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,100
Miss Kenderson.
65
00:03:14,100 --> 00:03:16,700
For the three weeks
you've been in my employ
66
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:20,000
as a hatcheck girl, you've spent
most of your time downstairs.
67
00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,900
Today, as luck would have it,
68
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:24,400
we actually had a customer
with a hat.
69
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:27,500
And where were you?
70
00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:29,200
Taking a break.
71
00:03:29,300 --> 00:03:30,400
It wasn't your break time.
72
00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:32,100
It was mine.
73
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:33,700
Miss Kenderson,
you're terminated.
74
00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:35,000
Get your things and clear out.
75
00:03:35,100 --> 00:03:36,300
Fine.
76
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:40,100
Sam, in the future,
I'd appreciate you
77
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:44,300
keeping your hands off
my hatcheck girls.
78
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:45,700
You know,
it's your own stupid fault.
79
00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:47,100
I mean, I wouldn't touch
your hatcheck girls
80
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,400
if you'd hire some waitresses.
81
00:03:50,700 --> 00:03:52,800
Hello, all.
82
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,600
Happy birthday, Dr. Crane.
83
00:03:54,700 --> 00:03:56,000
Why, thank you, Woody.
84
00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:57,500
How did you know?
85
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:59,200
Well, you left your wallet here
last night,
86
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:01,200
so I was looking through it
to find out whose it was.
87
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:04,800
Are you really gonna donate
your internal organs
88
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,600
in case of accident?
89
00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:08,900
They take them before
you die, you know.
90
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:14,000
Yeah, my uncle was just
in a fender bender.
91
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:16,700
They chased him half
way down the block.
92
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,300
Well, thank you
for sharing that with me
93
00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:25,000
on my, uh, special day.
94
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:29,400
So, you got some
big plans, here?
95
00:04:29,500 --> 00:04:30,700
Oh, nothing much.
96
00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:34,100
I've never been one of those
who tend to make a big brouhaha.
97
00:04:34,100 --> 00:04:36,200
As my mother always used
to tell me,
98
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:37,600
"Don't get excited.
99
00:04:37,700 --> 00:04:40,700
It's just another day
of the year."
100
00:04:44,300 --> 00:04:46,300
You're kidding me,
you never had parties
when you were a kid?
101
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,200
Friends over?
Cakes? Ice cream?
102
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:49,700
No.
103
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:53,600
Well, once I had a... a bran
muffin with a pat of oleo.
104
00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:57,600
Hey, you know something,
hey, I got an idea.
105
00:04:57,700 --> 00:05:00,400
Let's throw Frasier
a party here, huh?
106
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,200
You know, the bash that he
never had, what do you say?
107
00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:04,100
Yeah. Great idea.
(all agreeing)
108
00:05:04,100 --> 00:05:05,300
Afternoon, everybody.
109
00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:06,800
ALL:
Norm!
110
00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,600
What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
111
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:10,800
Another layer
for the winter, Wood.
112
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:15,800
CLIFF:
Hey, Norm, did you hear?
113
00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,200
We're gonna have a big,
uh, birthday bash there
114
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,900
for Doc Fras.
Yeah, great.
115
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,300
Hey, it'll be exciting,
Mr. Peterson.
116
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:24,800
We're gonna have
cake and ice cream.
117
00:05:24,900 --> 00:05:28,600
Yeah, we can go crazy and order
from Pizza-Pizza-Pizza-Pizza.
118
00:05:28,700 --> 00:05:30,400
Oh, what do they
serve there?
119
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,600
Pizza, you dweeb.
120
00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:36,000
You don't have to
bite my head off.
121
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:39,200
I've never been
there before.
122
00:05:39,300 --> 00:05:40,100
I don't know, guys.
123
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:41,800
I'm just not in the
mood for a party.
124
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,300
I got some bad news.
What?
125
00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:46,900
Vera lost her job.
126
00:05:46,900 --> 00:05:48,600
(all groaning)
CLIFF:
Her, too, huh?
127
00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:50,400
Boy, this recession
is hitting everybody.
128
00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:52,700
Well, they should have gone
for the gold
129
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,700
and gotten the security
of a government job.
130
00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:56,000
Yeah, I'll tell you,
131
00:05:56,100 --> 00:05:58,000
I could spit on that mail
and chuck it down the sewer,
132
00:05:58,100 --> 00:06:01,400
and they couldn't fire me.
133
00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:03,200
How do you know
that, Mr. Clavin?
134
00:06:04,100 --> 00:06:06,400
I-I don't.
135
00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:09,600
How about those Celtics, huh?
136
00:06:09,700 --> 00:06:12,000
It's too bad, man,
about Vera losing her job.
137
00:06:12,100 --> 00:06:13,300
NORM:
Yeah.
138
00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:16,100
We have, like, no money
coming in at all.
139
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:19,500
If something doesn't happen
soon, I may have to find a job.
140
00:06:22,300 --> 00:06:24,200
You gonna work, Norm?
141
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,400
I mean for Vera.
142
00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:29,700
"You gonna work, Norm?"
143
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,200
Hi, guys.
144
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:33,700
Oh, Rebecca,
there you are.
145
00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:35,400
I've been looking everywhere
for you.
146
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:36,500
What are you talking about?
147
00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:38,500
You're just sitting there
on your bar stool.
148
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,100
I know.
This is where I look from.
149
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,800
So what do you need, Norm?
150
00:06:42,900 --> 00:06:44,000
Well, it's Vera.
151
00:06:44,100 --> 00:06:46,200
She was, uh, laid off
down at the travel agency.
152
00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:48,200
Oh, so you want me to see if I
can use my corporate connections
153
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,600
to get her another job?
154
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:51,100
No.
155
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,900
You want me to help her out
with some professional resume?
156
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:54,200
Well, no.
157
00:06:54,300 --> 00:06:55,500
What do you want, Norm?
158
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:57,000
Well, you see,
159
00:06:57,100 --> 00:06:59,900
Vera ripped off a bunch of these
frequent flyer vouchers.
160
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:02,900
And I was wondering if I could
trade them in for free beers.
161
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,000
(scoffs)
162
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:07,100
What? What?
163
00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:09,200
Okay, somebody's got to
go get all this stuff.
164
00:07:09,300 --> 00:07:10,500
I want ice cream,
balloons, decorations...
165
00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:11,900
I nominate Frasier.
166
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,400
I second.
All in favor.
167
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,700
ALL:
Aye!
168
00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:17,600
You guys are the greatest.
169
00:07:24,600 --> 00:07:26,400
Let the party begin.
170
00:07:26,500 --> 00:07:29,900
The birthday boy is here,
and I've got the balloons.
171
00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:31,500
CARLA:
Hey, congratulations, Frasier,
172
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,100
on a job well done.
173
00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:34,900
Well, thank you
very much.
174
00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:40,300
I'll, uh,
be right back, Sam.
175
00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:44,500
Ah... I love birthdays.
176
00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,000
PETE:
Hey.
177
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,200
Isn't that
that French guy
178
00:07:49,300 --> 00:07:50,500
who's trying to steal
Woody's girlfriend?
179
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,600
Ah, yeah,
what a slimebag.
180
00:07:52,700 --> 00:07:55,100
Yeah, the man's got
the morals of a snake.
181
00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:57,200
I can believe he'd
show his face in here.
182
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,400
Hello, fellows.
183
00:07:58,500 --> 00:08:00,200
Hey.
Hey, Henri,
how're you doing?
184
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,600
HENRI:
Ah, Woody.
185
00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:05,300
Let's hurry
and take your picture.
186
00:08:05,300 --> 00:08:06,500
I have plans, huh?
187
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:07,600
Oh, yeah, I know.
188
00:08:07,700 --> 00:08:09,200
You want to steal
my girlfriend.
189
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:13,200
No. I could never take
Kelly away from you.
190
00:08:13,300 --> 00:08:15,000
Why, just this morning,
Kelly was telling me
191
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,900
how much she loves you.
192
00:08:16,900 --> 00:08:18,500
Really?
Yes.
193
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:22,300
It got so annoying, I almost had
to kick her out of the shower.
194
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,500
Is that a joke?
195
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:28,800
Ah! But of course.
196
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,600
(laughing)
197
00:08:30,700 --> 00:08:32,000
Are you ready?
198
00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:34,000
Yeah, I-I just shaved.
How's my face look?
199
00:08:34,100 --> 00:08:38,300
Mm, as smooth as your girlfriend
Kelly's bottom.
200
00:08:39,300 --> 00:08:40,700
Is that a joke?
201
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,500
(laughing):
But of course it is.
202
00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,300
You have to shave much closer.
203
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:50,300
(laughing)
204
00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:54,700
Where is this, uh, this,
uh, American sense of humor
205
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,100
I've heard so much about?
206
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,900
Uh, bring me a soda
and pay for it, Woody.
207
00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:02,800
Woody,
208
00:09:02,900 --> 00:09:05,200
you don't even
like this man.
209
00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:06,300
He's been bothering you
ever since
210
00:09:06,300 --> 00:09:08,400
he followed your girlfriend
back from Paris.
211
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,900
And now you're paying him
to photograph you?
212
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,100
Well, he just borrows
money from me anyway.
213
00:09:13,100 --> 00:09:16,500
This way I don't have to worry
about him paying me back.
214
00:09:16,700 --> 00:09:19,500
It's good you worked
that out, Woody.
215
00:09:21,500 --> 00:09:23,900
Yeah, besides, this is the first
formal picture I've had taken
216
00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:25,300
since my high school yearbook.
217
00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:26,500
I hated that one.
218
00:09:26,500 --> 00:09:27,600
Darned cowlick.
219
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,900
Oh, yeah, when your hair
all stands up like that?
220
00:09:29,900 --> 00:09:31,300
Uh-uh.
221
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:36,600
Sam?
222
00:09:36,700 --> 00:09:38,300
A thought occurs.
223
00:09:38,300 --> 00:09:39,300
Mmm?
224
00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,000
I always have such trouble
trying to figure out
225
00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:43,600
what to get Frasier
for his birthday.
Mm-hmm.
226
00:09:43,700 --> 00:09:46,900
Do you think perhaps
he'd like a photograph of me?
227
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,000
Why?
228
00:09:48,100 --> 00:09:49,300
I mean...
229
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:51,800
Of course he would.
230
00:09:51,900 --> 00:09:54,700
Why would any man not want
a picture of his wife?
231
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:55,700
I agree.
232
00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:59,600
A picture of you
is what every man wants.
233
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:02,800
May I have the honor
of taking it?
234
00:10:02,900 --> 00:10:05,000
Well, perhaps.
235
00:10:05,100 --> 00:10:06,800
But I must warn you.
236
00:10:06,900 --> 00:10:08,700
I've had bad luck
with photographers.
237
00:10:08,700 --> 00:10:10,800
It seems they always
overexpose the film,
238
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:13,100
and I come out looking
white as a ghost.
239
00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:15,600
Oh.
240
00:10:15,700 --> 00:10:18,300
I could put roses
in your cheeks.
241
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,600
And then afterward, maybe
I could photograph you.
242
00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:24,500
Why don't you
come this way?
243
00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:26,900
Uh, what do you think you
would like to be wearing?
244
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,100
Uh... an evening gown?
245
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,600
A black lace teddy?
246
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:33,600
My strong male hands?
247
00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:35,800
I wasn't thinking of anything
like that.
248
00:10:35,900 --> 00:10:39,000
Oh, come on, Lil,
loosen up.
249
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,300
Let him snap you
in some lingerie.
250
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:44,700
Guys love dirty pictures
of their babes.
251
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:46,900
Hey, Nick always used
to take them of me
252
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:50,200
until one time I smashed
his camera and broke his nose.
253
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:51,600
Oh, you got in a fight, huh?
254
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:54,400
No, fell off
the monkey bars.
255
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:03,100
Thank you, Carla.
256
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,000
Uh, I was thinking more
of a photograph of me
257
00:11:05,100 --> 00:11:06,300
he could put
in his office.
Mm-hmm.
258
00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,400
A nice formal portrait.
259
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:12,100
Ah, with just a hint of
smoldering sensuality
260
00:11:12,100 --> 00:11:13,900
dancing behind your eyes.
261
00:11:13,900 --> 00:11:16,800
Well, that goes
without saying.
262
00:11:16,900 --> 00:11:19,500
Well, uh, let's just take
a few test shots, uh?
263
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,400
Just to, uh, loosen you up
before we go back to the studio?
264
00:11:22,500 --> 00:11:24,700
Okay.
265
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:27,100
Hey, I thought you were here
to take my picture.
266
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,300
And I thought I ordered a soda.
267
00:11:29,300 --> 00:11:31,700
You got a point there.
268
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,700
Okay, okay.
269
00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:37,600
Good. Serious.
270
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,900
Happy. Seductive.
271
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,100
Angry. Playful.
272
00:11:44,100 --> 00:11:46,100
Have you ever modeled
professionally?
273
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,800
Goodness no.
274
00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:51,900
Oh, I know you're lying.
275
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,600
Come, let's go back
to the studio.
276
00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,200
Tres bien.
277
00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:56,900
Como?
278
00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,100
You said, "Let's go back
to the studio,"
279
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,700
and I said, "Tres bien."
280
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:03,600
No, I'm sorry,
I don't understand this.
281
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:04,700
Tres bien.
282
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:07,500
Ah, oh, "Tres bien"!
283
00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:10,700
I see I'm going
to have to teach you
284
00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:12,200
the French tongue.
285
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:19,900
Hey, Henri, I have your soda.
286
00:12:19,900 --> 00:12:22,000
Henri?
287
00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:23,300
Woody, he left.
288
00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:27,000
Well, all right,
then I'll just drink his soda.
289
00:12:29,300 --> 00:12:30,300
No, I can't do that.
290
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,500
That would be wrong.
291
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:35,600
Hi, guys.
292
00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:37,500
Rebecca!
293
00:12:37,700 --> 00:12:38,800
How did it go with Vera?
294
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,200
It went great.
I just love her.
295
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,300
And guess what?
296
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,400
I think I landed her
a pretty good job.
297
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,500
You're joking.
No, no,
I still have the touch.
298
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,200
I helped her with her resume.
Where is she working?
299
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,100
Then I got her prepped
for the interview.
Where's she working?
300
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,800
I even loaned her
my lucky scarf.
301
00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:52,600
Yeah, but where
is she working?
302
00:12:52,700 --> 00:12:54,600
VERA:
Norm!
303
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,600
Vera!
304
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:01,600
What are you
doing up there?
305
00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:03,300
VERA:
Check your hat, Mister?
306
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,100
(screaming)
307
00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:16,400
I'll, uh, I'll be right back.
308
00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:26,300
Hey, Norm, we need you.
309
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,000
Pete just hit a bull's-eye
and doubled off.
310
00:13:28,100 --> 00:13:30,500
You're our last hope.
311
00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,500
Norm?
312
00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,500
Norm?
313
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,400
She's up there.
314
00:13:42,500 --> 00:13:44,200
What?
315
00:13:44,300 --> 00:13:45,900
Listen.
316
00:13:45,900 --> 00:13:47,900
(steps thudding above)
You hear that?
317
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,600
Hear what?
318
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:52,200
Vera.
319
00:13:52,300 --> 00:13:54,700
She's crossing over
to the coffee machine.
320
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:59,200
No, wait, they could
be moving the piano.
321
00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:04,500
Nah, it's her.
322
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,500
Come on, man.
I know that walk.
323
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,900
You can't hear her
all the way up there.
324
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:11,900
I wish I couldn't,
Sam, believe me,
325
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:14,800
but that walk is
burned into my brain.
326
00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:16,200
I've heard it
in snow boots.
327
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:17,300
I've heard it in flip-flops.
328
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:18,600
I've heard it
in bare feet.
329
00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:20,100
Click-click, click-click,
click-click.
330
00:14:25,900 --> 00:14:27,700
Let the birthday fun begin, Sam!
331
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,600
The balloons have
entered the building.
332
00:14:31,100 --> 00:14:32,500
Say, where are the guys?
333
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:33,900
They're in the poolroom.
334
00:14:33,900 --> 00:14:35,300
Oh, jeez, I'm missing
all the fun
335
00:14:35,300 --> 00:14:36,300
at my own birthday party.
336
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:38,200
Hey, wait up guys!
337
00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:39,400
Hey, be careful
back there.
338
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:40,700
The dart tournament started.
339
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,700
(balloons popping)
340
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,400
I hate this bar.
341
00:14:57,800 --> 00:15:00,800
Norm, Vera's doing
342
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,200
a really good job up there.
343
00:15:02,300 --> 00:15:04,300
She is just terrific!
344
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:06,500
And funny!
Listen to this.
345
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:09,500
How many fat guys does it take
to change a lightbulb?
346
00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:10,800
I don't know.
347
00:15:10,900 --> 00:15:13,600
You can't get a fat guy
to change a lightbulb.
348
00:15:14,900 --> 00:15:16,300
You can't even get him
to come home
349
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,900
on Christmas Eve.
350
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,800
(laughing hysterically)
351
00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:27,700
Oh, she was telling
some real cute stories
352
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:29,700
about you, too, Norm.
353
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:30,900
Hey, why didn't you ever tell us
354
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,500
that your real first name
was Hilary?
355
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:35,500
Oh, who cares about that?
356
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:36,500
Hey, guys!
357
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:38,400
Norm's real first name
is Hilary!
358
00:15:38,500 --> 00:15:41,400
(laughing)
Hey, wait a minute.
359
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:43,200
Isn't that a girl's name?
360
00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:46,700
Hilary was my
grandfather's name
361
00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:49,000
and he once killed a man
who laughed at him.
362
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,100
What, he just up
and killed somebody
363
00:15:51,100 --> 00:15:52,200
for laughing at his name?
364
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:54,800
Not exactly.
He was a surgeon.
365
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:56,800
He sort of botched an operation.
366
00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:00,600
Norm, you don't have
to be defensive.
367
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:02,300
I think Hilary's a very
masculine name.
368
00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:03,900
In fact,
369
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,500
I think you ought to have it
monogrammed on your purse.
370
00:16:13,100 --> 00:16:15,000
Let the party begin!
371
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:15,800
All right!
372
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:17,100
You got the balloons, huh?
373
00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:17,900
Well, actually, no.
374
00:16:18,100 --> 00:16:19,200
They were out of balloons.
375
00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:21,200
Fortunately, a colleague
of mine was kind enough
376
00:16:21,300 --> 00:16:24,600
to give me a box
of surgical gloves.
377
00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:30,000
If you can't have a good
time with four dozen
378
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,600
rubber inflated hands,
you're just not trying.
379
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:38,400
Frasier, I've been
waiting for you.
380
00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,100
Happy Birthday.
381
00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:42,200
Well, darling, for me?
382
00:16:42,300 --> 00:16:43,600
Now, Frasier,
383
00:16:43,700 --> 00:16:45,300
you know that in the past
384
00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:47,000
some of my birthday
presents to you
385
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,400
have been a little dull.
386
00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:50,800
So, this year, I decided
to try something
387
00:16:50,900 --> 00:16:52,100
a little more adventurous.
388
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:54,400
I thought to myself,
389
00:16:54,500 --> 00:16:55,900
"What would my husband think
390
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:59,000
of a provocative photograph
of his demure wife
391
00:16:59,100 --> 00:17:02,800
stretched out languidly
on a bearskin rug?"
392
00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:04,000
ALL:
Whoo-hoo!
393
00:17:04,100 --> 00:17:05,700
Lilith, surely
you're joking.
394
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:07,100
I am not.
395
00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:12,300
(bar patrons whistle and howl)
396
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:13,900
Whoo!
397
00:17:17,700 --> 00:17:19,400
Well, you're right.
398
00:17:19,500 --> 00:17:21,500
That certainly is
a bearskin rug.
399
00:17:23,900 --> 00:17:26,700
And that is definitely you.
400
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,500
Oh, how erotic.
401
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,600
I guess we'll have
to keep the negatives.
402
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:32,500
We'd hate to have them
falling into the hands
403
00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:34,000
of Fully DressedWoman's Monthly.
404
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,100
Frasier, you're forgetting
what a cheeky monkey I can be.
405
00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:40,800
It's a gag gift.
406
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:42,200
If you wanted us to gag,
407
00:17:42,300 --> 00:17:43,600
you should have
taken a nudie.
408
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:48,200
Well, you're right, darling.
409
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:49,300
And it's hilarious.
410
00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:51,500
I'll be sure to put this
right up in my workshop.
411
00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:53,800
You don't have a workshop.
412
00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,000
Then I'll put it
in the closet.
413
00:17:57,900 --> 00:18:00,500
By the way...
414
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:02,000
here are the rest
of the photographs
415
00:18:02,100 --> 00:18:03,500
from the session.
416
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:04,800
Why, Lilith, these are...
417
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:09,400
You, you're practically...
418
00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:11,400
You're only wearing a...
419
00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:14,600
Oh, baby, baby!
420
00:18:18,500 --> 00:18:21,600
Happy birthday, Frasier.
421
00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:23,600
Would you like to go home
and get a better look
422
00:18:23,700 --> 00:18:25,200
at those?
I sure would.
423
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:33,700
Oh, uh, you can come, too.
424
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,300
Well, that's it.
425
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:41,700
I'm out of here.
426
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:42,900
"Out of here"?
427
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,400
Norm, it's 9:30.
It's not closing time.
428
00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:46,800
NORM:
I know.
429
00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:48,400
I'm still leaving.
430
00:18:48,500 --> 00:18:51,100
Oh, well, I'll drive you,
then, okay?
431
00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:52,400
No-no-no, I don't
need a ride.
432
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:55,100
I didn't even
have any beers.
433
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:58,500
I hope you're happy, woman.
434
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,500
Look, guys, uh...
435
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,300
I can't keep
hanging around here.
436
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,700
Knowing that she's
up there just...
437
00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:11,000
spoils the whole thing for me.
438
00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:13,300
I'll have to find
another bar, I guess.
439
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:15,000
I don't believe this!
440
00:19:15,100 --> 00:19:17,000
You're just gonna up
and walk out of here?
441
00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:20,800
Oh, I'm gonna say something that
442
00:19:20,900 --> 00:19:22,800
I thought I'd never say, but...
443
00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:24,200
dibs on the first stool!
444
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:29,600
Hey, come on!
445
00:19:29,700 --> 00:19:31,700
Listen, Cheers wouldn't be
Cheers without you.
446
00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:33,400
You're the reason
why people come here.
447
00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:34,800
Oh, what people?
448
00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:39,000
Well, the delivery
man, for one.
449
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,500
(Norm screams)
450
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:46,700
She's up there.
451
00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:48,700
She's everywhere.
452
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:50,400
Is she like multiplying?
453
00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:59,300
Vera?
(Vera crying)
454
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:00,500
Are you okay?
455
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:02,500
Norm...
456
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,600
Rebecca, have I thanked you
457
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:13,300
for sending me
the new hatcheck girl?
458
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:15,100
No, John, you haven't.
459
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:16,300
Well, here's why.
460
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,600
She was worse
461
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:19,700
than the last one
and I fired her.
462
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:22,900
Hey, do you want to tell me
why you fired Vera?
463
00:20:22,900 --> 00:20:25,000
Who are you?
I'm her husband, Norm.
464
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,600
Oh, yes.
465
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,400
I didn't recognize
you without a bar
466
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:29,700
growing out of your chest.
467
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:34,900
Well, I fired her
because she wasn't
468
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,200
paying attention
to her work.
469
00:20:36,300 --> 00:20:37,200
What are you talking about?
470
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:39,000
She's a very
conscientious worker.
471
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:41,300
How would you describe a woman
who spends all her time
472
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,100
on her hands and knees looking
through a knothole in the floor?
473
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:46,300
I knew it!
474
00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:49,600
Yep, there it is!
475
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:51,200
There it is!
476
00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:53,200
My good man,
you have my sympathy.
477
00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:56,000
To be married to her
must be quite an ordeal.
478
00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:58,700
Hey, take that back!
479
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,700
What?
Take that back!
480
00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:02,300
You're talking about
the woman I love!
481
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:04,200
I want you to take that
back before I turn you
482
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:05,600
into a pretzel!
483
00:21:05,700 --> 00:21:09,600
Well, that's a shape
I'm sure you're familiar with.
484
00:21:09,700 --> 00:21:11,400
I am not kidding!
485
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:12,800
All right, all right.
486
00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:14,800
I take it back. I apologize.
487
00:21:14,900 --> 00:21:17,100
All right.
488
00:21:17,100 --> 00:21:19,200
Now just go on back upstairs
489
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,700
before I pound you
into a... a beer nut!
490
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:24,100
Well, thank you.
I'm tiring of the theme.
491
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,600
Wow! Norm,
that was sweet.
492
00:21:31,700 --> 00:21:33,900
You stood up for your wife.
Shh, shh, shh.
493
00:21:33,900 --> 00:21:35,900
No, no, no,
don't be embarrassed.
494
00:21:35,900 --> 00:21:39,100
Everyone didn't see that,
did they?
495
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:40,700
We saw it.
496
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:42,400
I took a picture.
497
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:46,300
Norm, so what if they did?
498
00:21:48,300 --> 00:21:49,500
You're right.
499
00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:52,900
Listen, I joke around
a lot, but...
500
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,600
she's all I've got.
501
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,400
I don't know what I'd do
without her.
502
00:22:00,300 --> 00:22:02,200
I love her.
503
00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:05,000
That's sweet.
504
00:22:06,500 --> 00:22:08,200
You know, she's,
505
00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:10,800
she's still up in the
stairwell crying.
506
00:22:10,900 --> 00:22:13,500
Oh, I know. She'll, she'll go
away after a while.
507
00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:22,700
Yeah, there she goes.
508
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,500
You gotta love her!
35241
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