All language subtitles for All.Creatures.Great.and.Small.2020.S01E05.WEBRip.x265-ION265e

Looks like a good turnout
for the Darrowby fair.

- Oh, it does.
- Which is why...

it's the perfect time to open
the surgery up to the public.

Show ourselves off
at our professional best.

Yes, so you said.

I'm sure we'll still get
to see some of the fun.

Ah, James. All set?

-I think so.
-Nice badge.

Now, don't forget, you're
representing the practice.

I won't, Siegfried.
I'm honoured.

Come on, Clive.

Mr Herriot!

Right on time,
I'm pleased to see.

Of course, Mr Foyle.
Looking forward to it.

Good, good. Well,
we've a lot to get through.

Tempus "furgit",
as they say.

Two bob says he won't last
past lunchtime.

-Honestly, Tristan.
-Remember when Grier did it?

Drunk by midday. Threatened
to punch Foyle in the mouth.

The morning's not the problem.
It's the pony measuring.

Gets them every time.
Two bob, 3:30.

What do you say, Mrs Hall?
Think he'll make it
to the family pets?

I most certainly do.
And I don't approve of gambling.

Two bob, six o'clock.
Not a minute sooner.

Here, these are for you.

A map of the show. You'll
see that each area's numbered.

Two for the bull enclosure,
four for the goats and so forth.

-The key's at the bottom.
-That all seems clear enough.

And here's a full-time
timetable of events.

I've marked up your particular
responsibilities.

The pony measuring will
commence at 1:30 sharp in area
ten.

That's the... the yard
at Skeldale House.

It is. And then at 5:00pm,
you'll be required
to judge the pet show

in area nine.

-Also Skeldale House.
-Yes.

At all other times,
as attending vet,

you must remain here,
in area one.

So you can be located
immediately.

Now, my watch is synchronised
with the village clock.

I would suggest
that you do the same.

Right.

Oh...

Skeldale House is now open.

That's, Skeldale House
is now open to the public!

Right, time for our first tour,
I think, Mrs Hall.

-How many are we?
-Three.

Well... I'm sure things will
pick up as the day goes on.

Lady and gentlemen,

welcome.

Today, we shall be
lifting the curtain

on the fascinating world
of veterinary science.

If I could ask you
to step this way.

That's it. And please do refrain
from touching the equipment.

- Now, this is...
- You don't mind if I pop out, do you?

See how old James
is getting on.

Don't think I don't know
what you're up to.

-You leave him be.
-Mrs Hall, I'm offended.

A gentleman never
interferes in a wager.

He's in fine form, Mrs Burton.

I'd be surprised if you don't
take home a ribbon this year.

Watch what you're doing,
will you?

I'm so sorry, Mr Dinsdale.

- Bloody menace!
- James.

-Mind yoursen, lad!
-Sorry! Sorry.

There you are. Thank God.
Will you have a look
at Jenny's ferret?

I was trying to trim his nails
but he wouldn't stay still.

-And now he's bleeding.
-Let's take a look, shall we?

-Does he bite?
-Not much.

Ahh!

Oh, God!

No, Leopold! Let go!

Stop pulling your hand.

-If you jump around,
he'll just bite harder.
-Ahh!

And I thought vets were supposed
to have a way with animals.

There.

And now you're
bleeding and all!

- Sorry!
- -Registration for the dog show has now...

The next tour will be
starting shortly.

Please do help
yourselves to tea.

Oh, thank you.

Any chance of anything stronger?

Dorothy!

What are you doing here?

I was hoping to whisk you off
for a spot of lunch,

but I seem to have walked in
on some sort of extravaganza.

Well, it's the Darrowby Show.

-Are you stuck in here all day?
-'Fraid so.

Well, that's no fun.

Perhaps I can lend a hand.

You'd be bored rigid.

Nonsense!

Be just like the old days.
Two of us running the show.

But without the Zeppelins
or the rationing.

Well, that's something,
I suppose.

Ferret emergency.

Oh.

Great.

The powder will stop Leopold's
paw bleeding in no time.

-He won't even need a bandage.
-Shame we can't say
the same for you.

Oh, you know James - happy
to risk life and limb
for a damsel in distress.

It's looking better already.

We'll make a vet of you yet.

There you are. Good as new.

Here you go.

Are you showing Clive today?

We are. Dad's desperate
to sell him.

Really? I thought
he was a good earner.

Well, he is,
but he won't be forever.

There's a top breeder
coming today.

Woman called Southwick,
says she might be interested.

If Clive takes first prize, we
could get a really good price.

-Good luck.
-In fact, I was hoping I
could ask you to vouch for him.

You know, give him a clean
bill of health if the deal
goes ahead.

Of course. And I...
I'd be happy to.

Wonderful.

Thanks. I'd best
go and find my dad.

Yeah.

Wasn't old Clive a little bit
slow off the mark with
Dobson's cows?

Nothing a shot of testosterone
didn't sort out.

If that bull wins first
prize, it could go for a
fortune.

God knows, they need it.

So long as you're confident
there's no problem.

After the testosterone
was administered, Clive did
start doing his business.

Yeah, I know, I know.

Just the moment there's
even the slightest hint that
Clive's no good for breeding,

he'd be practically worthless.

Off to the knacker's yard
for pennies.

Maybe I should give him
another once over.

Well, you've already told
Helen you'll vouch for him.

Now, come on, enough of this.

You've been neglecting
your real duties for
far too long already.

That's more like it.

You're starting early.

My good friend here needs
fortification for the day ahead,

so we'll be wanting two more
when you're ready.

Steady on.
You know I'm on duty.

Yeah, that's why you need to
get them in while you have
the chance.

So have you had
your invitation yet?

Uh? What invitation?

Tea with the parents?

Now you're sticking around,
she'll be expecting things
to get a little more serious.

What, Maggie?

I don't think so.

If you're sure.

Mr Herriot?
Could you spare a minute?

It's a veterinary matter.

-I'd value your opinion.
-Of course.

Uh, can't it wait?

Sorry, Tris, vet business.

Well, at least
take one with you.

You have them.

You can settle in
for a nice long chat.

Aye, she's a little beauty,
isn't she?

A dark roan shorthorn.

I'm thinking
of buying her.

Nice wide pelvis.

Level udder.

She's a lovely
pedigree specimen.

You know, a cow like this
doesn't come cheap, Mr Rudd.

That she doesn't, but with your
say-so and recommendation...

We've been putting some by
and I'd like to make the
investment in a good breeder.

All you need is one
really good animal.

Five years from now,
we could have a pedigree herd.

So...

would you buy her?

I would.

Was that Dick Rudd I saw you
talking to out there?

He asked me to look over
a pedigree cow he's
thinking about buying.

A testament to his high regard
for your professional opinion.

-Can I ask you something?
-Mm-hm.

Just because you have to
administer testosterone to a
bull to get it serving the cows,

doesn't necessarily mean there's
got to be an underlying problem?

Oh, no, not necessarily. He
might just need a bit of a lift.

Must be exhausting moving
from herd to herd like they do.

Of course, it could
also be lameness.

The only thing that really
matters is whether the cows
are in calf or not.

Right.

Mr Dobson!

Hello there.

Ah, Mr Herriot.

I've been meaning to ask.

How did your herd get on with
the Alderson's bull in the end?

-Oh, yeah, yeah, grand.
-Mr Herriot!

So, no problems after I left?

No, no, no. No problems.

-Mr Herriot, if you please.
-Yes, Mr Foyle, just one moment.

-So your cows are in calf then?
-You're needed at the dog show.

I'll let you get on.

Mr Herriot! Dog show,
now, if you please.

Now, can anyone tell me
what this is?

No?

Well, we use this to administer
anaesthetic during surgery.

You slip it over the head,

tighten the strap

and slip in
the chloroform.

It's very effective
and entirely painless.

Oh! Ah!

So then, once little Tiddles or
Fido is happily asleep, we...

Yes, thank you.

...we move on to
our top-of-the-range

surgical equipment!

We have scalpels for making
the initial incision.

Thank you.

We have saws for cutting
through the bone.

Various sizes for
various thicknesses.

Uhh!

And, of course, a whole variety
of forceps and curettes

for really digging around.

Ooh!

Oh, dear!

Yes, well, moving on.

Right, a quick hiatus,
I think, Mrs Hall.

I might see what
refreshments are on offer.

Oh! Hello there.

Mr Farnon.

-You remember Dorothy?
-Yes. Yes, of course.
How nice to see you again.

-I hear you're quite
the tour guide.
-Oh, we're doing our best.

Very informative and
not boring at all, apparently.

Oh, well, high praise indeed.

Anyway, shan't be long.

Oh, Tris, are you coming?

Couldn't you go too, Aud?

I can't leave the surgery
unattended, as they
both well know.

Well, I'm here.

And I'm reasonably trustworthy.

Go on, you're dying
to have a look around.

You can repay me later in gin.

Well...

maybe just for a minute.

Oh, hello there.
Where have you been hiding?

The guinea pigs in the shed
needed fresh straw.

-And I gave the tabby new water.
-Did you now?

Well, I'd say that's worth
sixpence for the stall,
wouldn't you?

Thank you.

They won't
let us in the show.

I know you need to be careful,
veterinary, but there's
nowt wrong with the dog.

There's some matter
in the corner of his eye.

Oh, that's just a bit of powder
I was using on him, that's all.

I told that to him. Don't
know why he's being so fussy.

His temperature's 104.

I'm sorry, I can't allow him
into the show.

But we've shown
this dog every year.

Well, you can't show him
with a temperature like that.

But wait a minute!

He's had a long car journey.

-That could put up his
temperature, couldn't it?
-Not by that much, it couldn't.

You need to take him home
and see your regular vet.

So you won't let me
take him inside?

I'm afraid it's
out of the question.

I'm sorry.

-There you are.
Come on, don't dilly-dally.
-Sorry?

Luncheon is served, old boy,
and there's a pint or three
with your name on it.

Afternoon, Mr Herriot.

Helen says you'll vouch
for our bull.

Uh, yes, of course.

Much appreciated.

You're welcome, Mr Alderson.

Aye.

Ah, Herriot, just the man.

May I introduce
my god-daughter, Penelope?

Hello there.

And this here is Binkie.

She's feeling a little nervous
about the pet contest.

There's no need. I'm sure
Binkie here will do
marvellously.

There you are, Penn.
I told you there was
nothing to worry about.

All right, well...

Helen said that she told you
about their possible buyer.

Uh, yes, she did, hmm.

A lot riding on the sale of
that bull for the Aldersons.

Well, yes, I would imagine so.

Wouldn't want anything
to scupper their chances.

No need to go looking
for problems, if you
take my meaning.

Right, well, come on, Penn,
let's go find your mother,
shall we?

Here you go and there's
plenty more where that came
from.

You do know you're
wasting your time?

-What do you mean?
-You can't compete, old chap.

He's got the land, the house,
the pots of cash.

Helen's no gold digger but
a girl has to be practical.

-He was talking about
Alderson's bull.
-Oh, yes?

I got the distinct impression
he was warning me off.

Oh, so you think
he's feeling threatened?

That is not... No!

This is not about Helen.

Come on, drink up
and we'll go to the Drovers.

-But I can't leave the show.
-Course you can.

You've done your bit.
Foyle can measure a few ponies.

-Do you know that fellow?
-It'll be about his dog.

Ignore him,
stay and have a drink.

-No, I can't. Sorry.
-But...

Jim!

I see James is
still going strong.

Lunchtime you said, wasn't it?

Afraid you're out of
the running, little brother.

Hello.

Still 104. I've told you.

But...

he seems fine in himself.

-Honestly...
-And I'm telling you,

keeping him here is
irresponsible. He shouldn't
be around other dogs.

You need to put him in your car
and take him home.

Mr Herriot!

Please report to area ten
for the pony measuring!

That's Mr Herriot, area ten,
pony measuring!

That's it, names
and addresses in the book.

And the next tour will be
starting shortly.

Is everything all right?
Where's Mrs Hall?

She's gone to get some lunch.

-Oh.
-Don't worry.

I've been keeping a close eye.

No one's made off
with the silverware.

That's good to know.

So, um... how was your trip?

Um... Malta, wasn't it?

It was glorious.

Blazing hot with nothing to do
but sun and swim.

Darrowby must seem rather dull
in comparison.

Not at all.

I'm really rather
enjoying myself.

Although, that chap over there
keeps asking me to examine
his cat.

He's convinced she swallowed
an entire ball of yarn.

Mr Goggins, yes.
Last time it was a fob watch
complete with chain.

Goodness.
And was the cat all right?

She was, as was the watch.
It turned out he'd put it
away in a drawer.

Oh, dear!

Well, I should, um, go and get
my coat and then we should, um,

crack on!

Your audience awaits.

Mr Herriot!

Did you not hear me?

-You are needed for the ponies!
-Yes...

Yes, I know. There's just
a bull I need to look at.

Is the animal injured?

Does it require urgent
medical attention?

-It does not.
-Then I'm afraid
it'll have to wait!

Thirteen two.

I'm sorry, he's too big
for that class.

Well, have you allowed
for his shoes?

I have but, as you can see,
he's well over thirteen two.

He's actually over 14 hands.

He passed the vet at Hickly
without any trouble.

I can't help that. If you
want him to compete, he'll need
to be in the higher class.

Next, please.

You really do need to keep
'em moving, Mr Herriot.

Tempus "furgit". You know?

There was another chap was
convinced his dog was psychic

because it always barked
just before the doorbell rang.

Never occurred to him that
the animal just had better
hearing than he did.

Oh! Oh, well, it's
true what they say.

You really do see all
human life in a place like this.

Well, I suppose we do.

I think you're a very
fortunate man, Mr Farnon.

You've built a life
doing what you love most.

Not many people manage that.

And have you?

On the whole.

I've had my share of
disappointments.

And loss.

Things don't always work out
the way we expect.

Very true.

But moving forward in hope,
that's the key, isn't it?

There's so much in life
to savour.

Audrey! There you are.
You've been missing all the fun.

-Oh, yes?
-Goggins' cat.

Endless entertainment.

But you two ladies should
be out enjoying the show.

-Tristan and I can manage here.
-Of course.

What do you say, Aud?
You did promise me a gin.

-If you're quite sure.
-Absolutely.

It's been a pleasure
working with you, Mr Farnon.

And with you.

Maggie seems thoroughly and
surprisingly enamoured of you.

-Does she?
-Mmm.

Oh, God!

Do I detect that the thrill of
the chase is less exciting
than the actual catch?

Maggie's
wonderful, really.

I'm just not sure
about meeting parents.

Because that's what happens
next. Do you think I'm anywhere
near ready to meet parents?

Mmm?

Dorothy left her hat.

I won't have a man under
my roof mess a girl around.

You're better than that Tristan.

Yes, Mrs H.

Right, I've still an hour
or two to win this bet.

I'm off to the pony measuring,
see if I can't tip James
over the edge.

Everything all right?

I've barely had
a single animal

that's the right height
for the class they've
been entered in.

I had one that stooped down
at the knees every time
I came near it.

Pinpricks.

I'm sorry?

They prick them between the
shoulder blades so they drop
down if you try to measure them.

-What?!
-It's appalling, I know.

You see, this is what
you're up against.

Come on, get a drink.

And the winner
for the Best in Show, Sheep,

-goes to Mrs Ackroyd!
-Excuse me.

-Do you know where the vet is?
-I'm sorry I don't.
No, I'm sorry.

-Do you know where the vet is?
-No, no, sorry, I don't.

Do you know where the vet is?

Siegfried can certainly
be very... entertaining.

He has his moments.

And you said he was a widower?

He lost his wife four years ago.

I would have thought
it was more recent.

Oh, yes?

Am I to take it you've
designs on our Mr Farnon?

Oh! I don't think so.

Reckon I'd scare
the poor chap to death.

Besides, he strikes me
as a man who still thinks
of himself as married.

Well...

you can't always change
how you feel.

Leaving that brute was
the best and bravest thing
you ever did.

Yes.

Well...

Now, I promised Mr Enderby I'd
look in on the produce, so...

He's very keen to
show me his shallots.

Then I shall love you
and leave you.

I'll see you soon, Aud.

I'm sorry. I've measured him
three times.

-He's still over.
-What about the shoes?

You have to deduct
for the shoes.

I know, but even so...

He doesn't have shoes!

What's this?

-Certificate.
-Where's the pony?

-Here we go.
-You don't need to see him
if I've got a certificate.

That's written
how tall he is there.

I'll need to measure him,
certificate or not.

Well, that's not
what my dad says.

Well, I'm afraid
your dad's wrong.

We'll see about that.

It's unbelievable, isn't it?
They'll try anything.

If I were you,
I'd tell them to go hang.

Are you sure you don't want
to go and watch the jumping,
Siegfried?

No, no.
Happy to lend my support.

And the winner for the
largest marrow is Mr Ruthers.

Very well done.
Congratulations.

Marvellous effort.

Well done.

As you can see,
a fine example of...

That's not right,
these guns ain't right.

-Can't you read?
-I'm a good shot, I am.

No refunds means no refunds.

-It's not my fault
you can't shoot straight.
-It's a waste of time. Come on!

- Give us our money back!
- You want to find yourself a lad with half a brain.

-Let's go.
-Cheat!

Steady! Steady!

You've got accept it!
You don't need any measurements

-if you've got a certificate.
-Every animal goes
under the stick.

And it's not as though your pony
was slightly over the mark.
He's miles over!

Well, let me tell you, he were
passed through that vet at...

- Hickly!
- I know and I don't care.

He's not going through here.

Well, really! You know,
we were passed at Hickly too.

Could you take my dog's
temperature again?

He looks so much better.

Won't you just try him
one more time?

No, I bloody won't!
Just take your damn dog home.

It's never
happened here before!

You know, James, if you
wanted to pack it in...

-What?
-You don't have to
put up with this.

- This is an outrage.
- Mr Farnon!

I need you.

Eh! What you doing with my dog?

-What's happened?
-Poor thing were
hit by a pumpkin.

Pumpkin?

He was tied up safe as houses.
I'd only left him for a minute.

Sometimes a minute
is all it takes.

-I'll need you to assist me.
-If it hadn't been for that
other vet messing me about.

-You'll have to wait
there, Mr...?
-Happy!

-Really?
-Yes!

Excuse me.

Right.

OK. There we go.

Right.

There.

I'll need chloroform, sterile
dressings and a fresh set
of instruments.

-This will provide an excellent
teaching opportunity.
-Right.

Well, go on then,
what are you waiting for?

Oi! Leave that alone!

Ah! Mr Herriot. Finished
with the ponies, are you?

-Well and truly.
-Oh, good. Eh!

Eh, now you've only 25 minutes
till the pet contest.

-Don't go wandering off!
-Mr Foyle...

There is something
I have to do, all right?

But I promise you I will not
be late for the pet contest.

You'd better not be!

Or there'll be
serious repercussions!

No, the...

I thought they weren't
judging the bulls till 5:30.

No, they announce the winners
at 5:30.

The judging takes place
throughout the afternoon

and then the judges
retire to deliberate.

You'd know this if you'd
consulted your timetable.

All right there,
veterinary?

Yes.

Thanks.

Mr Shipham, isn't it?

You haven't seen Mr Dobson
at all, have you?

I can't say I
have. Here...

I've heard you like a drop
of the old home brew.

-I shouldn't really.
-Nonsense! Man's gotta drink!

Cheers!

That's the way!

-Here, have a pie.
-Thank you.

Sorry. Mr Dobson!

Mr Dobson,
I need to talk to you.

Good boy. That's it.

Right, probe and forceps.

There's no point giving them
to me. This one's on you.

It's a compound fracture,
so first you need to check
for bone fragments.

Right.

-I can't see any fragments.
-Are you certain?

-I think so.
-I don't need you to think,
I need you to know.

I'm certain. The bone's
snapped clean in two.

Excellent. Then if you debride
the wound and sluice it out
with plenty of saline,

we can set the bone
and stitch him up.

-Now, when you say "we"...
-Come on, we don't want
to be here all day.

Mr Dodson, I
am just asking

if you noticed any problems
when the bull was in
with your herd.

And I told you,
everything were fine.

So you're certain your cows
are in calf? You've actually
examined them?

Would Mr Herriot
please report to area nine?

The family pet contest
is about to commence!

-Looks like you're needed.
-Damn!

Very nice, very nice indeed.

Think I might be getting
the hang of this!

You seem to be having fun today.

Yes, the tours went
rather well, I thought.

I was thinking more of
the fair Dorothy.

Dorothy?

-Pair of you were getting on
like a house on fire.
-Oh, I don't know about that.

-She's a nice enough
woman. -Oh, come on, big
brother.

I saw the way you were
looking at her.

For God's sake, Tristan,
must you be so tediously
adolescent?

What's the problem?
She's a woman, you're a man.

There's clearly
an attraction there.

-You should've asked her
out to dinner.
-Don't be obtuse.

You know perfectly well
taking a woman to dinner
raises certain expectations.

-Would that be such a bad thing?
-I'm not discussing this.

-Cos you know I'm right.
-No, because I'm not taking
romantic advice

from someone who's spent
the entire day hiding
from a barmaid.

Says the man who runs
a mile if a woman shows
the slightest interest.

-What utter rot!
-I'm right and you know it.

It's like you've given up
on having any life at all.

Oh, well done, lad!
Not long to go now.

-You are ten minutes late!
-I know, I know.

I'm sorry.

-Could I just have a word
with Miss Alderson?
-No!

- It'll have to wait!
- -I'm not saying you need to get married,

- just have some blasted fun!
- -If you had a bit less blasted fun,

you might actually
achieve something!

Now, give me the damn forceps!

Mr Farnon?

What?

-There are children
on the premises.
-Your point being?

I'll thank you to modify
your language.

And I'll thank you to mind
your own bloody business!

In there! Now!

Well, what a wonderful...

Hello,
pretty boy!

...and varied turnout.

Well, given the...
given the range of animals,

I'm going to ask the owners
to show me just how much
they know their pets.

Just a couple of questions
about the habit and upkeep.
How does that sound?

Shut yer face!

Right then, let's begin.

I miss her too, you know.

What?

Evelyn was...

She was the absolute best.

No two ways about it,
but... Well...

She isn't here anymore,
Siegfried.

If you're going to continue
stating the obvious,
you might as well leave.

I'm just saying, she'd at least
want you to try and be happy.

I mean, you're not
entirely past it.

Good to know. Bandage.

I'm only thinking of you,
big brother.

Fine. Right, point taken.

I should move on and seize
the day and learn to love again.

Now, for God's sake,
will you please shut up!

Hello, there.

Binkie, isn't it?

And does he eat
anything unusual?

Uh, he ate a button once.

But it came straight out
t'other end.

And what about exercise?

And how old is this...
little lass?

Speak up, Penn.

He does have some
lovely markings.

Do you let them
out of the cage sometimes?

And what can you tell me
about this little chap?

He's a goldfish.

Or Carassius auratus.

He's only a year old, but
goldfish have been known to live
up to 30 years in captivity.

His diet mainly consists
of fish food pellets,

but he can also be fed boiled
peas and brine shrimp and...

Well, I think we have a winner.

Thank you, Mr Foyle.

Now, in third place,
number ten.

- The kitten.
- Well done, love!

In second place,
number 15, the ferret.

And in a very well-deserved
first place...

number six, the goldfish.

What?!

Uh, well, my congratulations
to the winners

and thank you, everyone,
for taking part.

Absolute disgrace!

Sorry. Sorry,
if I could...

Sorry. Excuse me.

Miss Alderson.

Well, I suppose that
didn't go too badly.

I'm sorry, Mr Foyle,
I really can't talk now.

Excuse me. Thank you. Helen!

It was the pet show
that did it for you.

Don't be too hard on yourself.
It's no mean feat lasting
as long as you did.

It wasn't the pets.

Well, what then?

I'm fairly certain
Helen's bull has a problem.

And Dobson won't give me
a straight answer as to whether
his cows are in calf or not.

If they were, you'd assume
he'd just say.

Exactly.

I gave Helen my word
I'd vouch for Clive.

You could always lie.

Hope it doesn't come back
to bite you on the backside.

Because that worked so well
for you in the past.

Look, there's no guarantee
Southwick will actually
want to buy him in.

She only goes for the very
top beasts. Best in show.

Maybe Clive won't win.

Maybe Southwick will buy
some other bull and you can
live to fight another day.

You're right.

You're right.

What if you're not?
What if he wins?

Hide in here. It's what I
do whenever there's someone or
something I want to avoid.

-Seems rather cowardly.
-Just because there's
a firing squad lined up,

doesn't mean you have
to stand in front of it.

Tristan!
Where the bloody hell are you?

Speaking of which.

The prize giving
for the bull contest

will commence in five minutes.
That's five minutes!

Steady on there, Clive,
old lad.

Steady.

Steady. That's it.

That's it.

I just want to
take a look at you.

Damn.

James?

I asked you to leave it alone.

So I take it you know?

Dobson was complaining
about his herd.

I just didn't want him to
put off the Alderson's buyer.

They can't sell an animal
that isn't fit!

-We don't know that for sure.
-I'm pretty sure.

All right.

All right.

But I'm asking you to keep it
to yourself... just for today.

I can't do that.

Look, I'm asking you
as a favour, James.

Not for me.

For Helen.

She trusts you.

If you care about her at all
then you won't let her down.

I missed again!

It's cheating,
that's what it is.

I'm not paying sixpence
for a broken rifle.

I told you, them's the rules.

What's going on?

My gun didn't work, but he still
won't give me my money back.

-Is that right?
-It's what they all say.

Makes no difference.

Perhaps I'll take a turn.

That'll be sixpence.

When you're ready.

The plaster must stay on
for two weeks.

By rights, I should
keep him in overnight,

-but as you're not local.
-Oh, no, no.

I wouldn't know what to do
with myself without him.

It's just me and him, see,
since the wife died.

He was her pride and joy,
he was.

There's no charge.

I'm so very grateful,
Mr Farnon.

Not at all. Just in future,
if you must tie him up...

-make sure it's somewhere safe.
-I will do.

Thank you.

Mr Herriot.

Right, I don't know about you
but I need a drink.

Unless you're still avoiding
the refreshment hall.

I'm sure I'll manage.

There's my brave soldier.
James?

I'll be right there.

Five forty-five. The old girl
could still win this.

Well I never!

Mrs Hall's a crack shot.
Who'd have thought it.

Well...

what was it you wanted, Jenny?

The dog or the bear?
I'd say we've won both.

Well done.

Where on earth did you
learn to shoot like that?

What did you think
we did in the Wrens?

Embroidery?

Right, drinks!

Thank you, Mrs Hall!

And first prize goes to
Mr Alderson, with Clive!

Very well done.
Congratulations.

Round of applause, everyone.

-Uh, pint and a half of best,
please.
-Coming right up.

Ah!

So is your friend
no longer with us?

No. She had to get back.

Oh, yes.

Of course.

I found it lying on the ground,
Mr Herriot.

It was creating
a serious trip hazard.

-I'm sorry.
-Yes, well...

Look, I realise this was your
first time, but if I can give...

I'm very sorry to interrupt,

but I'm afraid James
is needed at the bar.

Think you owe me a pint
for that one.

Ah. Won't be a minute.

Hello there, stranger.
How was the open house?

Yes, yes, good, thanks.

Um...

Maggie, I've been thinking
and, um...

this summer has been
a lot of fun.

And you're a really great girl.

But the thing is...

my final exams are not far off

and I'm going to be
working all hours.

-And...
-You're giving me the push.

No. No. No, not at all.
Far from it.

I just...

Give over, will you?

You're a nice enough lad,
Tristan, but...

it's not like we'd have
ever been serious.

Right.

Why is that then?

James?

Ah, there you are.

This is Mr Herriot, the vet
I were telling you about.

How do? Southwick.

I hear you can vouch for this
bull of theirs, is that right?

Cos I always like
a professional opinion
before I hand over good money.

That's right. Yes.

-I wonder, can I speak to you
for a moment, Mr Alderson.
-Eh, come on, lad!

Time's money. Just say the word
and we'll have ourselves a deal.

I'd really like to examine him
first, rule out any
possible problems.

-What sort of problems?
-There are no problems.

You can ask Dobson.
He's got no complaints.

His cows are all pregnant,
like they should be.

Is that right, Mr Dobson?
Can you say for certain
that your cows are in calf?

Well...

I don't know about
"for certain".

You what?

There's nowt wrong
with my bloody bull.

I'm afraid I noticed
some swelling on his spine.

And some signs of discomfort.

Are you saying
the beast is lame?

James?

It's most likely intermittent
and very easily missed.

But... yes.

-He may well be.
-But, Mr Dobson,

if your cows weren't in calf,
why lie about it?

Do you know something
about this?

Hugh?

Dobson was grumbling
about his herd and...

it occurred to me that it'd be
better off all round if he
kept his complaints to himself.

That's why I...
I slipped him a few bob.

Of all the
bloody stupid...

What were you thinking?!

Helen, I only wanted to help.

Well, now the sales off
and you've made my dad out
to be a liar, so thank you.

Poor beggar.

I'd say he's cooked his goose,
wouldn't you?

You can't imagine how hard it is
seeing you so terribly worried
about money all the time.

-It's no excuse.
-I know, but you won't
let me do anything.

So you thought
you'd go behind my back?

Because having money
means you can interfere
in other people's lives.

Because I'm too stupid
to make my own decisions.

Because you're a man
and you know best.

It's because I love you.

Yep! He's a goner.

You can tell from
the body language, see?

The coup de grace and then
the dramatic exit.

I love you, Helen.

And I would do anything in
the world to make you happy.

You've never said that before.

No, I know, but I should have.

God knows, I've wanted to.

I'm so hopeless
at these things.

Well, yes...

you are.

Jammy sod!

How did he manage to talk
himself out of that?

I told him, I'm going to make
a formal complaint.

I mean, you can't just
ignore a certificate!

-I know my rights!
-A bloody goldfish!

I ask you! Who's ever heard of a
goldfish winning a competition?

I'll have you know, all I have
done all day and in the face
of endless abuse

and insult, I might add,
is try to make fair
and just decisions.

And I have to say,
I have never in my life

witnessed such an appalling
display of unsportsmanlike and
downright criminal behaviour!

If anyone should be ashamed,
it's you lot!

You might want to
put down the stick.

Happen you got a point,
young man.

Cheaters
shouldn't prosper.

Well, James, I think we can
safely say you're one of us now.

I suppose so.

I knew you could do it.

Speaking of which,
he's made it to 6:15, so...

Two bob, wasn't it?

You had a bet?

Against me?

-More of a sweepstake.
-You could have warned me!

Baptism of fire, old chap,
baptism of fire.

The labours of Hercules pale
in comparison to being a vet
at the Darrowby Show.

Cheers!