Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,277 --> 00:00:15,838
Name... Annie Braddock.
2
00:00:15,881 --> 00:00:18,873
Age... 21.
3
00:00:18,917 --> 00:00:21,078
Area of interest...
4
00:00:21,119 --> 00:00:24,487
anthropology.
5
00:00:24,523 --> 00:00:26,423
Describe your work experience
6
00:00:26,458 --> 00:00:29,291
as it relates to your intended field.
7
00:00:29,328 --> 00:00:31,387
My God.
8
00:00:31,430 --> 00:00:34,058
Where do I begin?
9
00:00:34,099 --> 00:00:37,091
Attention. The Museum of Natural History
10
00:00:37,135 --> 00:00:39,830
will be closing in 15 minutes.
11
00:00:41,972 --> 00:00:44,031
Please exit the hall
12
00:00:44,075 --> 00:00:46,635
by using the western staircase.
13
00:00:59,490 --> 00:01:01,684
Child-rearing around the world
14
00:01:01,725 --> 00:01:05,025
boasts a wide variety of
customs and mores.
15
00:01:09,632 --> 00:01:13,227
But perhaps the most bizarre
social patterns
16
00:01:13,269 --> 00:01:16,727
can be found within the small island
community of Manhattan.
17
00:01:16,773 --> 00:01:18,968
Asshole!
18
00:01:19,008 --> 00:01:22,000
The inhabitants of the region
known as the Upper East Side
19
00:01:22,045 --> 00:01:24,980
have the most prosperous,
yet idiosyncratic
20
00:01:25,014 --> 00:01:27,448
social systems on the planet.
21
00:01:27,484 --> 00:01:29,281
After successfully mating
22
00:01:29,319 --> 00:01:31,116
and producing offspring,
23
00:01:31,154 --> 00:01:33,587
the men are often distant
and uninvolved,
24
00:01:33,622 --> 00:01:35,681
leaving their women to hunt, gather
25
00:01:35,724 --> 00:01:37,783
and provide for their families.
26
00:01:40,863 --> 00:01:44,162
Yet the resourceful mothers
of the Upper East Side
27
00:01:44,199 --> 00:01:46,167
have plenty of time to participate
28
00:01:46,201 --> 00:01:49,500
in a variety of sex-role-
specific activities.
29
00:01:49,537 --> 00:01:53,440
These include body mutilation,
30
00:01:53,475 --> 00:01:56,773
sacred meditation...
31
00:01:56,811 --> 00:01:58,870
...even fasting rituals.
32
00:02:02,251 --> 00:02:05,117
Which brings us to our focus
on child-rearing:
33
00:02:05,153 --> 00:02:06,916
Who actually does it?
34
00:02:06,954 --> 00:02:09,548
Well, in Africa,
they have a saying...
35
00:02:09,590 --> 00:02:12,218
"It takes a village to raise a child."
36
00:02:12,260 --> 00:02:14,523
But for the tribe of
the Upper East Side,
37
00:02:14,561 --> 00:02:16,860
it takes just one person...
38
00:02:16,898 --> 00:02:18,797
the nanny.
39
00:02:24,538 --> 00:02:26,597
Okay, so what's depicted here
40
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:28,767
is not a typical tribal ritual,
41
00:02:28,809 --> 00:02:32,210
but rather the unraveling
of one such nanny.
42
00:02:32,245 --> 00:02:34,839
Actually, this nanny is me.
43
00:02:34,881 --> 00:02:37,645
And why I'm telling off
a teddy bear is the subject
44
00:02:37,684 --> 00:02:39,514
of this field diary.
45
00:02:39,552 --> 00:02:43,284
If by chance my report stereotypes
or geographically profiles,
46
00:02:43,323 --> 00:02:45,120
forgive me.
47
00:02:45,158 --> 00:02:48,457
I'm not exactly an objective observer.
48
00:02:52,399 --> 00:02:55,425
Master in economics,
minor in communications.
49
00:02:55,469 --> 00:02:58,438
- Yeah!
- Elaine Bassen,
50
00:02:58,472 --> 00:03:01,440
honors in urban planning,
minor in sociology.
51
00:03:02,741 --> 00:03:04,299
Annie Braddock,
52
00:03:04,343 --> 00:03:07,210
high honors in business,
minor in anthropology.
53
00:03:07,246 --> 00:03:10,010
So here I am a few months before
the teddy bear incident...
54
00:03:10,049 --> 00:03:11,175
Whoo-whoo!
55
00:03:11,217 --> 00:03:12,706
...a native New Jersey girl
56
00:03:12,750 --> 00:03:15,219
participating in a dreaded
rite-of-passage ceremony.
57
00:03:15,254 --> 00:03:17,188
- Doh!
- Oh my God!
58
00:03:17,223 --> 00:03:18,689
Spazz!
59
00:03:18,723 --> 00:03:20,156
And here's the woman who reared me
60
00:03:20,191 --> 00:03:21,886
pretty much all by herself.
61
00:03:21,926 --> 00:03:23,757
She's a nurse.
62
00:03:23,795 --> 00:03:25,922
Note the shoes.
63
00:03:25,964 --> 00:03:29,422
What is it?
64
00:03:29,467 --> 00:03:32,197
You'll see.
65
00:03:32,237 --> 00:03:35,297
Oh, wow.
66
00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:37,500
- Thank you.
- I know it's not much,
67
00:03:37,541 --> 00:03:40,009
but I wanted to buy you
your first business suit.
68
00:03:40,044 --> 00:03:42,568
- Thanks. Thank you.
- You can look back on this
69
00:03:42,613 --> 00:03:44,945
- when you're a famous CFO.
- Oh, Mom.
70
00:03:44,982 --> 00:03:47,610
Gosh, come on. It's one meeting
at Goldman Sachs.
71
00:03:47,651 --> 00:03:51,519
It's highly competitive.
I'm probably never gonna get the job.
72
00:03:51,555 --> 00:03:53,545
All right, stop with the negativity.
73
00:03:53,590 --> 00:03:56,115
Your father was always negative
and look where it got him.
74
00:03:56,159 --> 00:03:59,650
- Double-wide trailer in Scranton.
...in Scranton.
75
00:03:59,695 --> 00:04:01,663
Honey, I'm not kidding.
76
00:04:01,697 --> 00:04:04,689
I would give the world to be sitting
where you're sitting right now.
77
00:04:04,734 --> 00:04:07,295
You are so much smarter than I was.
78
00:04:07,337 --> 00:04:09,668
No man is gonna squash your dreams.
79
00:04:09,705 --> 00:04:13,437
No one's gonna tell you
how to live your life.
80
00:04:13,477 --> 00:04:17,344
Maybe I'm... maybe I'm not
CFO material, you know?
81
00:04:17,380 --> 00:04:20,838
No, what if I'm better
suited at something...
82
00:04:20,883 --> 00:04:22,373
- something else?
- Like what?
83
00:04:22,418 --> 00:04:24,978
Anthropology? Honey how are you
gonna make a living at that?
84
00:04:25,021 --> 00:04:28,388
Look, if you really want to
run around in grass skirts,
85
00:04:28,424 --> 00:04:32,121
then make enough money to
spend Christmas at Club Med.
86
00:04:39,234 --> 00:04:42,226
Annie, it's 7:15.
87
00:04:42,270 --> 00:04:45,137
Get moving or
you're gonna be late.
88
00:04:45,573 --> 00:04:47,201
New Jersey PATH train to Manhattan
89
00:04:47,275 --> 00:04:48,936
arriving on track two.
90
00:04:48,977 --> 00:04:50,205
Oh.
91
00:04:50,245 --> 00:04:51,872
New Jersey PATH train to Manhattan
92
00:04:51,913 --> 00:04:53,539
arriving on track two.
93
00:04:58,719 --> 00:05:01,188
Oh, goodness.
94
00:05:01,222 --> 00:05:05,214
I have to admire
this corporate drag. Wow.
95
00:05:05,259 --> 00:05:08,194
Well, at least I'm not wearing last
night's outfit at 8:00 a.m., party girl.
96
00:05:08,228 --> 00:05:11,425
Let's just say that you
missed a fabulous throw-down
97
00:05:11,465 --> 00:05:13,365
and Tom Waylan was there.
98
00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:15,027
- So?
- He asked about you.
99
00:05:15,069 --> 00:05:16,400
Twice.
100
00:05:16,437 --> 00:05:18,631
All right, well, I gotta go.
101
00:05:18,671 --> 00:05:20,696
- Real life awaits.
- God.
102
00:05:20,740 --> 00:05:22,708
You know, I bet none of
those cultures you study
103
00:05:22,742 --> 00:05:24,539
practice such rigorous celibacy.
104
00:05:24,577 --> 00:05:27,308
- You ever hear of the Shakers?
- Yes, and they're extinct.
105
00:05:34,187 --> 00:05:36,087
Excuse me, sir? Sir.
106
00:05:36,122 --> 00:05:37,953
- Yeah?
- I got off at the wrong stop.
107
00:05:37,991 --> 00:05:40,357
Can you tell me where
Chambers Street is, please?
108
00:05:40,393 --> 00:05:42,258
You see the building
with the red umbrella?
109
00:05:42,295 --> 00:05:44,490
- Yes.
- It's about five blocks below that.
110
00:05:44,529 --> 00:05:46,293
Oh shit.
111
00:05:47,966 --> 00:05:50,833
Our financial analyst training program
112
00:05:50,869 --> 00:05:52,497
is so competitive.
113
00:05:52,537 --> 00:05:55,836
We have over 8,000 applicants
for 10 positions.
114
00:05:55,874 --> 00:05:57,899
So, why don't you tell me,
115
00:05:57,943 --> 00:06:01,845
in your own words,
who exactly is Annie Braddock?
116
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:03,848
Wow, that's...
117
00:06:03,882 --> 00:06:06,373
that's certainly
an easy enough question.
118
00:06:06,418 --> 00:06:08,249
Mm-hm.
119
00:06:08,286 --> 00:06:10,617
Annie Braddock is
120
00:06:10,655 --> 00:06:13,318
a kind...
121
00:06:14,326 --> 00:06:16,555
well...
122
00:06:17,728 --> 00:06:20,629
I am...
123
00:06:20,665 --> 00:06:23,327
Go on.
124
00:06:23,367 --> 00:06:26,336
Well, you see...
125
00:06:26,370 --> 00:06:28,133
Mm-hm.
126
00:06:28,172 --> 00:06:30,231
I have absolutely no idea.
127
00:06:30,274 --> 00:06:31,468
Excuse me.
128
00:06:34,045 --> 00:06:36,104
Who is Annie Braddock?
129
00:06:36,147 --> 00:06:38,115
It wasn't exactly a trick question.
130
00:06:38,149 --> 00:06:41,675
Yet somehow I couldn't
formulate a response.
131
00:06:41,718 --> 00:06:43,948
Of course I knew all the basic facts...
132
00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:47,286
the date of birth, home town,
socioeconomic makeup.
133
00:06:47,324 --> 00:06:50,554
But I didn't really know
who I was, where I fit in,
134
00:06:50,593 --> 00:06:52,686
who I was gonna be.
135
00:06:52,729 --> 00:06:55,892
I was suddenly terrified
I'd never find the answer.
136
00:06:55,932 --> 00:06:58,695
I need five rolls of fabric
overnighted from London.
137
00:06:58,734 --> 00:07:01,260
I don't care how much it costs.
138
00:07:01,304 --> 00:07:02,634
* Ooh *
139
00:07:02,671 --> 00:07:05,038
* You're a native New Yorker... *
140
00:07:05,075 --> 00:07:06,735
How about her?
141
00:07:06,775 --> 00:07:09,505
This woman... could she
be Annie Braddock?
142
00:07:09,545 --> 00:07:11,740
* You should know by now *
143
00:07:11,780 --> 00:07:14,908
* You're a native New Yorker... *
144
00:07:17,052 --> 00:07:19,542
Hmm.
145
00:07:20,956 --> 00:07:23,685
Or perhaps this is Annie Braddock?
146
00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:30,192
* You grew up riding the subways *
147
00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:32,597
* Running with people *
148
00:07:32,633 --> 00:07:35,398
* Up in Harlem, down on Broadway *
149
00:07:35,437 --> 00:07:38,894
* There you are lost in the shadows *
150
00:07:38,940 --> 00:07:41,602
* Searching for someone *
151
00:07:41,642 --> 00:07:44,702
* You're the heart and soul
of New York City... *
152
00:07:47,181 --> 00:07:49,206
On that spring afternoon,
153
00:07:49,250 --> 00:07:53,152
it seemed my future was finally set.
154
00:07:53,187 --> 00:07:55,518
A Central Park bag lady I would be.
155
00:07:55,555 --> 00:07:59,219
At least I'd finally get
to live in Manhattan.
156
00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:01,989
But before I officially
surrendered to fate,
157
00:08:02,028 --> 00:08:05,293
something... or rather, someone...
158
00:08:05,333 --> 00:08:08,028
intervened.
159
00:08:11,471 --> 00:08:12,802
Mmm.
160
00:08:15,541 --> 00:08:17,532
- Whoa!
- Ahh ahh!
161
00:08:22,048 --> 00:08:23,639
Hello there.
162
00:08:23,682 --> 00:08:25,047
Hi.
Are you okay?
163
00:08:25,084 --> 00:08:27,280
Get off of me, you pervert.
164
00:08:32,591 --> 00:08:34,684
Do you belong to anyone, little man?
165
00:08:34,727 --> 00:08:37,252
- Grayer!
- I belong to you.
166
00:08:37,296 --> 00:08:39,856
Grayer!
167
00:08:39,899 --> 00:08:42,959
Oh God. Thank you so much.
168
00:08:43,002 --> 00:08:45,799
You just averted a minor disaster.
169
00:08:45,837 --> 00:08:47,771
The woman featured here...
170
00:08:47,806 --> 00:08:49,740
the one wearing
the Dior snakeskin jacket
171
00:08:49,774 --> 00:08:51,071
and Louis Vuitton shoes...
172
00:08:51,110 --> 00:08:53,476
is unfortunately not Annie Braddock.
173
00:08:53,511 --> 00:08:55,775
* New York City girl... *
174
00:08:57,615 --> 00:09:00,311
She is, in fact, a perfect
female specimen
175
00:09:00,351 --> 00:09:02,216
from the Upper East Side clan.
176
00:09:02,253 --> 00:09:04,118
For the purpose of this case study,
177
00:09:04,155 --> 00:09:06,988
we'll just call her Mrs. X.
178
00:09:07,025 --> 00:09:09,357
Hi, I'm Mrs. X.
179
00:09:09,394 --> 00:09:11,954
Let me apologize for my feral son.
180
00:09:11,996 --> 00:09:13,963
Oh, no need to apologize.
181
00:09:13,998 --> 00:09:15,624
Please, I love kids. I'm Annie.
182
00:09:15,666 --> 00:09:17,725
You're a nanny? Oh!
183
00:09:17,768 --> 00:09:19,236
- No, I'm not.
- No wonder.
184
00:09:19,270 --> 00:09:21,363
- You're so good with children.
- Oh, I'm not.
185
00:09:21,406 --> 00:09:23,737
Actually, I just lost my nanny Bertie,
186
00:09:23,774 --> 00:09:26,265
which is why I'm out in
this godforsaken park
187
00:09:26,310 --> 00:09:27,868
- by myself.
- Okay.
188
00:09:27,911 --> 00:09:29,936
- She left us to go get married.
- All right.
189
00:09:29,980 --> 00:09:32,915
Oh my God.
Are... are you employed?
190
00:09:34,284 --> 00:09:36,717
- No, unfortunately, l...
- Fabulous!
191
00:09:36,752 --> 00:09:38,720
Look, here...
here is my card.
192
00:09:38,754 --> 00:09:41,848
Please please please
call me later this week.
193
00:09:41,891 --> 00:09:43,859
We'll schedule a lunch.
Anywhere you'd like to go.
194
00:09:43,893 --> 00:09:45,758
- I'm sorry...
- The Mark, the Four Seasons.
195
00:09:45,795 --> 00:09:48,696
Unfortunately, I have to run, but I
really look forward to hearing from you.
196
00:09:48,731 --> 00:09:50,562
I'm sorry... I really think
you misunderstood me.
197
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:52,500
I have a very good feeling about this.
198
00:09:52,535 --> 00:09:54,196
- I...
- Call me.
199
00:10:01,676 --> 00:10:03,667
Pardon me, I couldn't help but overhear.
200
00:10:03,712 --> 00:10:05,476
I'm looking for a new nanny too.
201
00:10:05,513 --> 00:10:07,175
- Oh I...
- Can I give you my card as well?
202
00:10:07,216 --> 00:10:09,547
- Excuse me?
- I pay well above average.
203
00:10:09,584 --> 00:10:12,576
- I have a card too, call me.
- I have a place in the Hamptons.
204
00:10:12,621 --> 00:10:14,646
Donald Trump lives in my building.
205
00:10:14,689 --> 00:10:17,658
It seemed that fate now
offered me a wonderful alternative...
206
00:10:17,692 --> 00:10:20,786
an opportunity to completely
duck out of my life.
207
00:10:20,829 --> 00:10:23,354
So I decided for one summer
208
00:10:23,398 --> 00:10:25,592
to abandon Annie
209
00:10:25,633 --> 00:10:28,262
and trade her in for
a brand-new persona...
210
00:10:28,303 --> 00:10:30,066
Nanny.
211
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:36,238
Of course there was one tiny problem.
212
00:10:36,278 --> 00:10:40,179
Everything I knew about
nannying came from the movies.
213
00:10:41,882 --> 00:10:45,477
Even so, I fell asleep confident
214
00:10:45,518 --> 00:10:48,283
that I'd magically find my way.
215
00:10:54,627 --> 00:10:57,256
Annie?
216
00:10:57,298 --> 00:10:59,198
Annie!
217
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:24,121
Annie?
218
00:11:28,961 --> 00:11:31,828
Get your feet
on the ground, young lady.
219
00:11:53,684 --> 00:11:55,549
Hmm.
220
00:12:01,726 --> 00:12:04,695
The fact that I had
no child-care experience
221
00:12:04,729 --> 00:12:07,163
mattered little to the matriarchs
of the Upper East Side.
222
00:12:07,198 --> 00:12:09,722
Even though I don't have a job,
223
00:12:09,766 --> 00:12:12,894
I just don't seem to have
enough time for myself.
224
00:12:12,936 --> 00:12:15,167
All they needed
to know was that I was white,
225
00:12:15,206 --> 00:12:18,175
a college grad, and terminally single.
226
00:12:18,209 --> 00:12:20,473
As you can see, my husband and I
227
00:12:20,510 --> 00:12:21,977
are getting a divorce.
228
00:12:22,012 --> 00:12:25,379
So you and the kids must remain
229
00:12:25,415 --> 00:12:27,315
on my side of the apartment
230
00:12:27,350 --> 00:12:29,147
at all times...
231
00:12:29,185 --> 00:12:32,154
until the custody battle is settled.
232
00:12:34,257 --> 00:12:38,125
In short, I was the Chanel
bag of nannies.
233
00:12:38,161 --> 00:12:39,923
I heard through the grapevine
234
00:12:39,962 --> 00:12:41,520
you've been meeting
with a lot of people.
235
00:12:41,563 --> 00:12:44,328
So I thought you might appreciate
a civilized lunch at Bergdorf's
236
00:12:44,367 --> 00:12:46,027
rather than being
interviewed at the apartment.
237
00:12:46,068 --> 00:12:47,626
Thank you,
that's very considerate.
238
00:12:47,669 --> 00:12:50,194
Not really.
I just love to eat out.
239
00:12:50,239 --> 00:12:52,207
I'll probably come up
with a million excuses
240
00:12:52,241 --> 00:12:53,674
for us to go have lunch.
241
00:12:53,709 --> 00:12:56,041
I mean, if you end up
with us, I mean.
242
00:12:56,078 --> 00:12:58,069
Ready?
243
00:12:58,113 --> 00:13:00,308
Do... do you know
what you're having?
244
00:13:00,349 --> 00:13:02,214
I don't mean to rush you,
245
00:13:02,251 --> 00:13:05,414
but I'm attending a 2:00 lecture
at the Parents' Society:
246
00:13:05,454 --> 00:13:08,650
"Super Mom, Trying to Juggle It All."
247
00:13:08,689 --> 00:13:11,123
I'll just have the burger.
248
00:13:11,159 --> 00:13:14,151
Thanks.
249
00:13:14,195 --> 00:13:16,755
I can't guarantee
that the meat here
250
00:13:16,798 --> 00:13:19,665
is antibiotic-free.
But the chef here is from Brittany,
251
00:13:19,700 --> 00:13:23,431
so I highly recommend the crepe
Bretagne. Deux, s'il vous plait.
252
00:13:23,471 --> 00:13:25,837
- Okay.
- Excellent choice.
253
00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,431
Thanks.
254
00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:32,236
You're from New Jersey.
255
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:34,407
Unfortunately.
256
00:13:34,449 --> 00:13:37,975
Oh no, there are some very
lovely parts of that state.
257
00:13:38,018 --> 00:13:40,714
Friends of ours have a horse
farm in Upper Saddle River.
258
00:13:40,754 --> 00:13:42,153
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
259
00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:44,521
I... I hear it's really nice there.
260
00:13:44,558 --> 00:13:46,321
I'll have to take you
riding there one day.
261
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:47,586
Okay.
262
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:49,458
Tell me more.
263
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:52,521
I want to know all about you.
264
00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:55,728
- Uh...
- I'm from Connecticut, actually.
265
00:13:55,768 --> 00:13:58,101
I went to Smith.
And don't believe the rumors,
266
00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:00,299
we weren't all lesbians.
267
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:01,806
After graduation,
268
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:05,641
I moved here and started
running the Gagosian.
269
00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:07,646
The art gallery.
270
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,705
- Oh.
- It was a blast.
271
00:14:09,748 --> 00:14:11,716
But you really... you can't
do that sort of thing
272
00:14:11,750 --> 00:14:13,081
when you're raising a child.
273
00:14:13,119 --> 00:14:15,849
The parties,
the schmoozing, the travel...
274
00:14:15,888 --> 00:14:17,718
Oh, excuse me...
275
00:14:17,755 --> 00:14:19,485
- Oh.
- Bitsy.
276
00:14:19,524 --> 00:14:21,117
- It's you.
- Bitsy.
277
00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,650
I've so been meaning to call.
278
00:14:23,695 --> 00:14:25,925
Is there anything at all I can do?
279
00:14:25,964 --> 00:14:27,795
Not unless you know a hit man.
280
00:14:27,832 --> 00:14:30,232
That lawyer Jeanie Whitman
recommended was no help at all.
281
00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:31,860
I am so sorry.
282
00:14:31,903 --> 00:14:35,168
Turns out all our assets
are actually in Tucker's company's name.
283
00:14:35,206 --> 00:14:37,174
All I'm getting is a million flat.
284
00:14:37,208 --> 00:14:39,505
That's appalling.
285
00:14:39,543 --> 00:14:44,072
If I'd known it would go this far,
I would have just turned a blind eye.
286
00:14:44,115 --> 00:14:47,346
Anyway, enjoy the rest
of your lunch before I ruin that too.
287
00:14:47,385 --> 00:14:49,944
I'll call you later
this week, sweetheart.
288
00:14:53,924 --> 00:14:56,893
Such a shame.
289
00:14:56,927 --> 00:15:00,158
But she should have seen it
coming... everyone else did.
290
00:15:00,197 --> 00:15:02,825
Anyway, where were we?
Ah yes.
291
00:15:02,866 --> 00:15:05,391
After Gagosian,
292
00:15:05,435 --> 00:15:08,063
I met Mr. X.
293
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:12,907
You know, my grandmother
worked as a domestic
294
00:15:12,943 --> 00:15:14,637
so we wouldn't have to.
295
00:15:14,677 --> 00:15:16,838
And here you are, fresh out of college
296
00:15:16,879 --> 00:15:19,280
voluntarily taking a nanny gig.
297
00:15:19,316 --> 00:15:22,045
I told you, this is not
a lifelong commitment.
298
00:15:22,084 --> 00:15:24,780
Okay? It's just a way
for me to get my head together.
299
00:15:24,820 --> 00:15:26,583
Besides, the money is great.
300
00:15:26,622 --> 00:15:28,783
I finally get to move to the city.
301
00:15:28,824 --> 00:15:31,486
I'm moving to the city
to go to grad school,
302
00:15:31,526 --> 00:15:33,154
not to be somebody's servant.
303
00:15:33,196 --> 00:15:35,686
Plus you know you're wrong,
or you wouldn't be lying to your mother.
304
00:15:35,730 --> 00:15:38,222
This is all just happening too fast.
305
00:15:38,267 --> 00:15:41,599
I don't understand why you can't
just live at the house for a while,
306
00:15:41,636 --> 00:15:42,933
just to get on your feet.
307
00:15:42,971 --> 00:15:44,939
Mom, I lived at home through
four years of college.
308
00:15:44,973 --> 00:15:46,339
Don't you think that's long enough?
309
00:15:46,375 --> 00:15:48,103
Well, how could you find
a decent apartment so fast?
310
00:15:48,143 --> 00:15:51,271
The bank has, you know,
an excellent program.
311
00:15:51,313 --> 00:15:53,440
They got me hooked up with
a trainee, which is great.
312
00:15:53,481 --> 00:15:55,312
I'm getting in the car.
313
00:15:55,350 --> 00:15:57,113
Can I come with you?
314
00:15:57,152 --> 00:15:59,882
I would feel a lot better if I could
at least see where you were living.
315
00:15:59,921 --> 00:16:01,946
Come on. The other trainees, you know,
316
00:16:01,990 --> 00:16:04,458
they went to fancy boarding schools
317
00:16:04,492 --> 00:16:06,050
and European exchange programs.
318
00:16:06,094 --> 00:16:09,461
I show up with my mom,
I'll just look like a big dork.
319
00:16:09,497 --> 00:16:11,657
Guess that makes sense.
320
00:16:11,699 --> 00:16:13,189
Come here.
321
00:16:13,234 --> 00:16:14,497
I love you.
322
00:16:14,535 --> 00:16:16,901
Let me know the minute I can visit you.
323
00:16:16,937 --> 00:16:18,802
I'll call you when I get there, okay?
324
00:16:21,909 --> 00:16:24,844
* Freedom, freedom... *
325
00:16:24,912 --> 00:16:26,640
Hey, you're gonna get me a ticket.
326
00:16:26,679 --> 00:16:29,114
* Freedom *
327
00:16:29,149 --> 00:16:31,481
* You got to give what you take... *
328
00:16:31,517 --> 00:16:34,577
- You're crazy.
- * Freedom *
329
00:16:34,621 --> 00:16:37,250
- * Freedom... *
- Sing it again.
330
00:16:37,291 --> 00:16:39,656
* Freedom *
331
00:16:39,692 --> 00:16:42,820
* You got to give what you take. *
332
00:16:45,565 --> 00:16:47,760
I love that song.
333
00:16:49,402 --> 00:16:51,528
I'm telling you, like the bees,
334
00:16:51,570 --> 00:16:53,663
you're free, girl.
335
00:16:53,705 --> 00:16:55,230
That's okay, I'll take care of it, miss.
336
00:16:55,275 --> 00:16:57,038
Oh, thank you.
337
00:16:57,076 --> 00:16:58,940
I can't believe this.
I could get used to this.
338
00:16:58,977 --> 00:17:01,844
- I'm telling you that.
- Thank God I'm getting a shrink degree.
339
00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:04,610
You know, I love you,
but you're harsh.
340
00:17:04,650 --> 00:17:06,346
A little bit.
341
00:17:06,386 --> 00:17:08,853
Just give me a hug.
342
00:17:08,887 --> 00:17:12,653
Mwah!
I'll see you soon, I'm sure.
343
00:17:12,691 --> 00:17:14,124
Annie?
344
00:17:15,593 --> 00:17:18,687
You know the path of least resistance?
345
00:17:18,729 --> 00:17:20,560
It can lead through a minefield.
346
00:17:28,572 --> 00:17:30,164
Oh, hi.
347
00:17:30,207 --> 00:17:32,641
You are the new nanny?
348
00:17:32,677 --> 00:17:35,373
Yes, and you must be Maria.
349
00:17:35,413 --> 00:17:37,677
- Nice to meet you.
- Hmm.
350
00:17:37,715 --> 00:17:39,842
Can I come in?
351
00:17:39,884 --> 00:17:41,784
Okay.
352
00:17:41,819 --> 00:17:43,480
Leave it there.
353
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:45,045
The floor is clean.
354
00:17:45,089 --> 00:17:47,080
Mmm.
355
00:17:52,430 --> 00:17:53,862
Wow.
356
00:17:53,897 --> 00:17:56,923
This place is incredible.
357
00:17:56,966 --> 00:18:00,527
I hope you last longer
than the last one.
358
00:18:00,570 --> 00:18:02,265
Who, Bertie?
Oh yeah.
359
00:18:02,305 --> 00:18:04,273
Mrs. X told me that she
left to get married.
360
00:18:04,307 --> 00:18:07,242
Married? She had one date
and she get fired.
361
00:18:09,979 --> 00:18:13,278
Oh, Maria? Are you gonna tell
Mrs. X that I've arrived?
362
00:18:13,316 --> 00:18:15,284
Mrs. X is shopping.
363
00:18:15,318 --> 00:18:17,286
But she left you a note on the table.
364
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,879
Now I have to go run the vacuum, okay?
365
00:18:19,922 --> 00:18:21,947
Ay...
366
00:18:34,903 --> 00:18:36,302
"Dear Nanny,
367
00:18:36,338 --> 00:18:38,306
welcome!"
368
00:18:38,340 --> 00:18:40,500
Please make note that from here on in,
369
00:18:40,541 --> 00:18:44,171
I'm referred to as "Nanny" by all
the people in the Xs' social network.
370
00:18:44,213 --> 00:18:47,079
I'm so excited to have you onboard.
371
00:18:47,115 --> 00:18:50,016
Please make yourself completely at home.
372
00:18:50,051 --> 00:18:52,781
Manuel is making you
your own set of keys.
373
00:18:52,820 --> 00:18:54,788
- Mmm.
- You should have them by tomorrow.
374
00:18:54,822 --> 00:18:56,584
The fridge is well-stocked.
375
00:18:56,624 --> 00:18:58,285
Tofu cutlets?
376
00:18:58,326 --> 00:19:00,520
- Ugh.
- Help yourself to anything.
377
00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:01,823
Yuck.
378
00:19:01,863 --> 00:19:04,263
Sorry I could not be there to meet you
379
00:19:04,298 --> 00:19:06,891
but I'm trying to squeeze
in a little shopping
380
00:19:06,933 --> 00:19:08,901
before my Parents' Society meeting,
381
00:19:08,935 --> 00:19:10,766
which reminds me...
382
00:19:10,804 --> 00:19:13,238
please pick Grayer up
from the Christian preschool...
383
00:19:13,274 --> 00:19:15,002
- Wow!
...at 2:15 sharp.
384
00:19:15,041 --> 00:19:17,737
It's extremely important not to be late.
385
00:19:17,778 --> 00:19:19,040
Ooh.
386
00:19:19,079 --> 00:19:20,444
As you can see,
387
00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:22,846
I have attached a list
of basic house rules.
388
00:19:22,883 --> 00:19:25,646
- Hello, Manolo.
- We believe it's important
389
00:19:25,684 --> 00:19:29,177
to maintain some sense
of structure in our home
390
00:19:29,222 --> 00:19:30,848
for Grayer's sake.
391
00:19:30,890 --> 00:19:32,483
Rule number one:
392
00:19:32,525 --> 00:19:35,222
Grayer and his playmates
are never allowed
393
00:19:35,262 --> 00:19:37,230
- in the master bedroom.
- Oops.
394
00:19:37,264 --> 00:19:40,664
Of course, you should refrain from
entering our bedroom as well.
395
00:19:40,699 --> 00:19:42,599
Rule number two:
396
00:19:42,635 --> 00:19:44,899
Grayer is never allowed
to nap during the day.
397
00:19:44,937 --> 00:19:46,199
No naps?
398
00:19:46,238 --> 00:19:48,468
This throws his sleeping
schedule completely off.
399
00:19:48,506 --> 00:19:51,442
And I prefer him tired when I get home.
400
00:19:53,913 --> 00:19:55,777
Rule number three:
401
00:19:55,814 --> 00:19:58,283
- We just had the walls redone.
- Mm-hm.
402
00:19:58,317 --> 00:20:00,444
Please keep Grayer from
rubbing up against them.
403
00:20:00,486 --> 00:20:02,215
- Oh!
- Rule number four:
404
00:20:02,254 --> 00:20:04,949
If school is ever canceled,
405
00:20:04,989 --> 00:20:08,015
the following nonstructured
outings are permissible...
406
00:20:08,059 --> 00:20:10,254
the Met,
407
00:20:10,295 --> 00:20:11,956
the Morgan Library,
408
00:20:11,996 --> 00:20:14,157
the French Culinary Institute,
409
00:20:14,199 --> 00:20:16,190
the New York Stock Exchange.
410
00:20:16,234 --> 00:20:17,895
- Rule number five:
- Rule number five!
411
00:20:17,936 --> 00:20:20,597
- We do not take
the subway because of germs.
412
00:20:20,637 --> 00:20:22,537
- Oh God.
- Rule number six:
413
00:20:22,573 --> 00:20:24,837
Grayer still must be in a stroller
414
00:20:24,875 --> 00:20:27,036
- when crossing Park or Madison.
- Blah blah blah.
415
00:20:27,077 --> 00:20:29,637
Rule number seven: Grayer maintains
416
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:31,671
a high-soy organic diet.
417
00:20:31,715 --> 00:20:33,239
Rule number eight:
418
00:20:33,283 --> 00:20:36,514
Practice French with Grayer
at least three times a week.
419
00:20:36,553 --> 00:20:39,044
His father wants him to
attend Collegiate
420
00:20:39,089 --> 00:20:40,818
where he's currently wait-listed.
421
00:20:40,858 --> 00:20:42,849
French?
Holy merde.
422
00:20:42,893 --> 00:20:45,088
His acceptance is a top priority.
423
00:20:45,128 --> 00:20:47,289
Mon Dieu.
424
00:20:47,331 --> 00:20:49,265
Nanny?
425
00:20:51,734 --> 00:20:54,203
Nanny?
426
00:20:54,238 --> 00:20:55,864
- What are you doing?
- The note said
427
00:20:55,905 --> 00:20:58,237
to pick up Grayer from school at 2:15.
428
00:20:58,274 --> 00:20:59,332
Hm.
429
00:20:59,376 --> 00:21:01,275
And it's only... it's only 1:00.
430
00:21:01,310 --> 00:21:05,144
So I was a little sweaty from moving
and I thought that I would, you know...
431
00:21:05,181 --> 00:21:08,810
What I mean is, what are you
doing in that bathtub?
432
00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:11,877
And why are your bags
433
00:21:11,921 --> 00:21:14,082
strewn all over the guest room?
434
00:21:14,123 --> 00:21:17,286
I thought that was my room.
435
00:21:17,326 --> 00:21:18,418
No.
436
00:21:20,396 --> 00:21:21,987
No, Nanny.
437
00:21:23,999 --> 00:21:25,967
This is your room.
438
00:21:26,001 --> 00:21:27,969
Oh.
439
00:21:28,003 --> 00:21:30,267
Okay.
440
00:21:30,305 --> 00:21:32,773
Yeah, this is...
441
00:21:32,807 --> 00:21:34,866
Very sweet.
442
00:21:36,577 --> 00:21:38,409
Hmm.
443
00:21:48,689 --> 00:21:51,749
I'm sorry. Do you have the time?
444
00:21:51,792 --> 00:21:53,919
2:15.
445
00:21:53,961 --> 00:21:55,826
So they'll be getting out anytime now?
446
00:21:55,863 --> 00:21:58,161
- 2:45.
- I'm sorry?
447
00:21:58,198 --> 00:22:01,964
They get out every day at 2:45.
448
00:22:02,002 --> 00:22:04,334
Dumbass.
449
00:22:06,273 --> 00:22:07,864
It quickly became clear
450
00:22:07,907 --> 00:22:10,501
that Mrs. X had arranged
for me to arrive everywhere
451
00:22:10,543 --> 00:22:12,568
torturously early.
452
00:22:15,214 --> 00:22:18,342
Get ready, ladies. Here they come.
453
00:22:26,025 --> 00:22:28,118
Grayer? Grayer?
454
00:22:30,029 --> 00:22:32,792
- Grayer X?
- Who is it you're looking for?
455
00:22:32,831 --> 00:22:35,629
- Grayer.
- I know that one.
456
00:22:35,667 --> 00:22:38,135
He plays with my wee monster, Darwin.
457
00:22:38,170 --> 00:22:40,435
- Hy-ya!
- Ow!
458
00:22:40,473 --> 00:22:42,441
Oh, Grayer, there you are.
459
00:22:42,475 --> 00:22:44,374
Hey, little man, you remember me?
460
00:22:44,409 --> 00:22:46,172
Yes, and I hate you!
461
00:22:46,211 --> 00:22:49,044
What? Come on, we get
along great, remember?
462
00:22:49,081 --> 00:22:51,311
Like when we met in Central Park?
463
00:22:51,350 --> 00:22:53,147
Let me get your backpack.
464
00:22:53,185 --> 00:22:55,153
Stop. Grayer, stop.
465
00:22:55,187 --> 00:22:57,178
Help, police! She's hurting me!
466
00:22:57,222 --> 00:22:59,452
- They usually start out that way.
- Yes.
467
00:22:59,491 --> 00:23:01,356
- Danger, danger!
- Just be patient, eh?
468
00:23:01,393 --> 00:23:03,327
- Let me put you in your stroller, okay?
- It'll get easier.
469
00:23:03,362 --> 00:23:05,124
- Hang on one second.
- I'm too big for a stroller!
470
00:23:05,162 --> 00:23:06,494
- Grayer!
- Help!
471
00:23:06,530 --> 00:23:07,963
- Grayer! - Police.
472
00:23:07,999 --> 00:23:10,797
Grayer! Grayer!
473
00:23:10,835 --> 00:23:13,167
Grayer! Come here!
474
00:23:13,204 --> 00:23:15,535
- I hate you, I want Bertie!
- I know, honey.
475
00:23:15,572 --> 00:23:17,803
I know you want Bertie.
Bertie had to leave to get married
476
00:23:17,842 --> 00:23:19,638
or go on a date or something, okay?
477
00:23:19,676 --> 00:23:22,111
But I promise, we're gonna have a lot
of fun together, honestly.
478
00:23:22,146 --> 00:23:26,242
All right? Now let me see how handsome
you look in your uniform.
479
00:23:26,283 --> 00:23:27,840
What's that?
480
00:23:29,152 --> 00:23:30,983
- Oh.
- Don't touch that!
481
00:23:31,021 --> 00:23:34,480
It belongs to my daddy!
I hate you. I want Bertie.
482
00:23:34,524 --> 00:23:36,185
Grayer.
483
00:23:36,226 --> 00:23:37,818
Already, one had to wonder...
484
00:23:37,861 --> 00:23:40,796
what kind of culture would
turn a father's business card
485
00:23:40,830 --> 00:23:42,730
into a security blanket?
486
00:23:42,766 --> 00:23:44,791
Here we are.
487
00:23:44,834 --> 00:23:48,099
Home sweet home.
First mission accomplished.
488
00:23:49,772 --> 00:23:52,969
Grayer, get up off the floor.
It's very dirty.
489
00:23:53,008 --> 00:23:54,271
Nuh-uh.
490
00:23:54,310 --> 00:23:56,709
I have an idea.
491
00:23:56,745 --> 00:23:58,542
Why don't we race to the front door?
492
00:23:58,580 --> 00:24:00,514
Okay, last one there is a rotten egg.
493
00:24:00,549 --> 00:24:03,177
I'm not stupid.
You're just gonna let me win.
494
00:24:03,218 --> 00:24:05,778
No, I am a mighty good runner, mister.
495
00:24:05,821 --> 00:24:08,187
- Not with your pants down.
- Oh my God!
496
00:24:10,092 --> 00:24:12,855
Oh shit! The stroller!
497
00:24:18,900 --> 00:24:21,027
Shit! Grayer!
498
00:24:21,069 --> 00:24:23,537
You said a curse. I'm telling Mommy.
499
00:24:23,571 --> 00:24:26,335
Grayer, I am not kidding.
Open this door right now.
500
00:24:27,775 --> 00:24:29,572
- Maria!
- Touch my fingers.
501
00:24:31,179 --> 00:24:33,443
- Ow!
- I am not letting go...
502
00:24:33,481 --> 00:24:35,108
...until you open the door!
503
00:24:35,149 --> 00:24:36,377
Ow!
504
00:24:39,153 --> 00:24:40,415
Pardon me.
505
00:24:44,425 --> 00:24:46,416
I think this belongs to Grayer.
506
00:24:46,461 --> 00:24:48,486
Rode the elevator to the 12th floor.
507
00:24:48,528 --> 00:24:50,962
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
508
00:24:50,997 --> 00:24:52,965
Sorry, we're having a little
bit of a situation here.
509
00:24:57,704 --> 00:24:59,500
By the way, my name's...
510
00:24:59,538 --> 00:25:02,406
Since my job required a vow of chastity,
511
00:25:02,442 --> 00:25:04,910
it was essential that
I avoided all intimacies,
512
00:25:04,945 --> 00:25:06,571
especially first names.
513
00:25:06,612 --> 00:25:08,773
For the purpose of this field diary,
514
00:25:08,814 --> 00:25:11,283
let's just call him Harvard Hottie.
515
00:25:11,318 --> 00:25:13,343
I'm the Xs' new nanny.
516
00:25:13,386 --> 00:25:17,185
- Oh.
- Very new, as you can probably tell.
517
00:25:17,223 --> 00:25:21,023
I'm taking off all my clothes.
518
00:25:21,060 --> 00:25:23,961
Seems to be popular on this floor.
519
00:25:25,331 --> 00:25:27,925
Mind if I take a crack at him for you?
520
00:25:27,967 --> 00:25:30,902
Be my guest.
521
00:25:30,936 --> 00:25:34,303
Hey, Grayer,
it's your pal from upstairs.
522
00:25:34,340 --> 00:25:37,275
Hey, would you be a sport
and unlock the door?
523
00:25:37,309 --> 00:25:40,038
It's not nice to lock people out.
524
00:25:40,078 --> 00:25:42,069
Please, buddy?
525
00:25:44,582 --> 00:25:47,779
- Hey.
- Why are you here?
526
00:25:47,819 --> 00:25:51,983
Oh, I'm just helping out my new friend.
527
00:25:52,023 --> 00:25:54,513
Annie.
528
00:25:54,558 --> 00:25:56,993
Annie. Annie the nanny.
529
00:25:57,028 --> 00:25:59,223
She's your friend?
530
00:25:59,264 --> 00:26:02,824
Yes, she's my friend.
Isn't she your friend too?
531
00:26:02,866 --> 00:26:05,267
Not yet.
532
00:26:14,611 --> 00:26:16,442
- Thank you.
- Anytime.
533
00:26:18,282 --> 00:26:21,046
Suddenly the world's
most notorious loner
534
00:26:21,084 --> 00:26:23,211
had two new men in her life.
535
00:26:23,253 --> 00:26:27,621
Unfortunately, I knew that
the big one was off-limits.
536
00:26:27,657 --> 00:26:29,557
Based on my observations,
537
00:26:29,592 --> 00:26:32,494
guys like Harvard Hottie
only slum it when they're in college.
538
00:26:32,528 --> 00:26:34,860
So, instead of following my heart,
539
00:26:34,897 --> 00:26:38,060
I focused on finding a way
into Grayer's.
540
00:26:48,377 --> 00:26:51,403
Grayer, stop it.
541
00:26:51,447 --> 00:26:54,540
* Why can't we be friends? *
542
00:26:54,583 --> 00:26:56,381
Befriending Grayer
543
00:26:56,419 --> 00:26:58,545
certainly wasn't easy.
544
00:27:01,923 --> 00:27:03,515
La la la la la la!
545
00:27:03,558 --> 00:27:05,822
But then again, Margaret Mead
didn't run home every time
546
00:27:05,861 --> 00:27:08,694
- she contracted malaria.
- Whoa!
547
00:27:08,730 --> 00:27:10,754
You're in trouble!
548
00:27:10,799 --> 00:27:12,926
I thought this job was supposed to be
549
00:27:12,968 --> 00:27:14,730
a way to get your head together?
550
00:27:14,768 --> 00:27:18,033
Two weeks in and you already sound
depressed, dejected and paranoid.
551
00:27:18,073 --> 00:27:20,405
You forgot to mention malnourished.
552
00:27:20,442 --> 00:27:23,205
I swear, all these people eat
is bean curd and seltzer.
553
00:27:23,244 --> 00:27:24,439
Ew.
554
00:27:24,479 --> 00:27:26,207
I mean, even the ice cream
is made out of tofu.
555
00:27:26,247 --> 00:27:28,613
So why don't you come down
and have dinner with us then?
556
00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:31,618
My new roomie's making gumbo.
557
00:27:31,652 --> 00:27:34,120
It's not gumbo.
It's Creole bouillabaisse.
558
00:27:34,154 --> 00:27:36,088
I don't get it.
559
00:27:36,123 --> 00:27:39,320
You move to the city and overnight
your life becomes "Will & Grace."
560
00:27:39,360 --> 00:27:41,021
I'm here, knee-deep in...
561
00:27:41,061 --> 00:27:43,359
Shit. It's probably my mom.
562
00:27:43,397 --> 00:27:44,693
She's the only one who has this number.
563
00:27:44,731 --> 00:27:45,857
Bye.
564
00:27:45,899 --> 00:27:48,800
- Hello?
- Annie?
565
00:27:48,835 --> 00:27:50,530
- Hi.
- My God.
566
00:27:50,570 --> 00:27:53,334
An entire week has gone by
and you haven't called me back.
567
00:27:53,373 --> 00:27:55,841
Mom, I told you I was gonna
be so busy with work.
568
00:27:55,875 --> 00:27:57,968
Oh come on. You can't find five minutes
569
00:27:58,011 --> 00:27:59,534
to call your worried mother?
570
00:27:59,578 --> 00:28:01,171
How are you, honey?
571
00:28:01,214 --> 00:28:03,239
How's the job? How's the apartment?
572
00:28:03,283 --> 00:28:06,547
God, everything is just perfect.
573
00:28:06,585 --> 00:28:09,214
I mean, the job is a dream.
574
00:28:09,255 --> 00:28:11,688
A little challenging.
So rewarding though.
575
00:28:11,723 --> 00:28:14,817
And the apartment is just incredible.
576
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:17,988
- Yeah?
- And my roommate could not be nicer.
577
00:28:18,030 --> 00:28:19,395
Nanny, in the morning,
578
00:28:19,431 --> 00:28:21,262
I need you to stop at Tiffany's
and pick up Mr. X's watch.
579
00:28:21,300 --> 00:28:23,461
Then I need you to Xerox
the recommendation letters
580
00:28:23,501 --> 00:28:25,265
for Grayer's Collegiate application.
581
00:28:25,304 --> 00:28:28,432
Also, I was thinking, we should
introduce French food into his diet.
582
00:28:28,473 --> 00:28:30,907
It might enhance his study
of the language. So tomorrow night,
583
00:28:30,943 --> 00:28:33,843
why don't you make him
coquilles St. Jacques for dinner, hmm?
584
00:28:33,878 --> 00:28:35,971
- Annie?
- Dry cleaning.
585
00:28:36,013 --> 00:28:39,005
Who was that, your roommate?
586
00:28:39,050 --> 00:28:41,349
Mom, I have to go.
I have some work stuff to take care of.
587
00:28:41,386 --> 00:28:43,910
Wait a minute.
I want to make a plan to visit.
588
00:28:43,955 --> 00:28:46,014
Ann...
589
00:29:03,039 --> 00:29:06,008
Hi, ladies.
590
00:29:06,042 --> 00:29:09,034
So I took Madison to
the doctor this morning.
591
00:29:09,079 --> 00:29:11,047
She had grown three
inches in six months.
592
00:29:11,081 --> 00:29:13,481
You take her to the doctor too?
593
00:29:13,515 --> 00:29:16,575
Darling, I do everything.
My job is a type C.
594
00:29:16,618 --> 00:29:18,883
- Mmm.
- Type C? What's type C?
595
00:29:18,922 --> 00:29:21,822
Oh Jesus. Okay, newbie.
596
00:29:21,857 --> 00:29:24,156
Pay attention, honey. Basically,
597
00:29:24,194 --> 00:29:27,129
there's three types of nanny gigs.
Okay, type A,
598
00:29:27,163 --> 00:29:30,962
you provide "couple time"
a few nights a week
599
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:34,060
for women who work all day
and parent at night.
600
00:29:34,103 --> 00:29:36,230
Type B, you provide
601
00:29:36,271 --> 00:29:38,865
"sanity time," every afternoon, right,
602
00:29:38,907 --> 00:29:41,705
to a woman who mothers in
the mornings and the evenings.
603
00:29:41,744 --> 00:29:43,871
And type C, the most common,
604
00:29:43,912 --> 00:29:46,641
you provide 24-7 "me time"
605
00:29:46,681 --> 00:29:49,741
to the woman who neither
works nor mothers.
606
00:29:49,784 --> 00:29:52,379
So, which one are you?
607
00:29:52,421 --> 00:29:54,321
I am type C,
608
00:29:54,356 --> 00:29:57,688
no question.
Although when I started I had no idea.
609
00:29:57,725 --> 00:30:01,525
I thought it would be
a kind of fun and easy job.
610
00:30:01,562 --> 00:30:04,122
You'd think a college graduate
611
00:30:04,165 --> 00:30:06,793
would choose a job a little more wisely.
612
00:30:06,834 --> 00:30:09,597
Actually, this job kind of chose me.
613
00:30:09,636 --> 00:30:12,571
Chose you?
614
00:30:12,606 --> 00:30:15,734
Please, child. I left my country
615
00:30:15,776 --> 00:30:19,007
because I thought I could give my boy
and my sick mother a better life.
616
00:30:19,046 --> 00:30:22,675
I was supposed to be here
two or three years tops.
617
00:30:22,716 --> 00:30:25,276
And while I've been raising
these strangers' children,
618
00:30:25,318 --> 00:30:29,516
my own child has grown up
without a mother.
619
00:30:29,556 --> 00:30:31,649
That's how this job chose me.
620
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:44,501
Half a tablespoon of tarragon.
621
00:30:49,809 --> 00:30:52,073
That's dried. I like fresh.
622
00:30:52,111 --> 00:30:55,603
Well, you know what?
Dried's all we got, okay, kiddo?
623
00:30:55,648 --> 00:30:58,481
I hate coquilles dry. I want sushi.
624
00:30:58,516 --> 00:31:01,077
Well, then tell your mother
you want to learn Japanese.
625
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:02,382
Mmm!
626
00:31:02,421 --> 00:31:04,321
Okay.
627
00:31:09,594 --> 00:31:12,257
Ah!
628
00:31:12,298 --> 00:31:16,233
I'm telling Mommy. You're in trouble.
629
00:31:16,267 --> 00:31:18,429
Okay.
630
00:31:20,138 --> 00:31:23,107
That's it.
631
00:31:26,845 --> 00:31:29,871
No, Mommy says they're full
of high-fructose corn syrup.
632
00:31:29,914 --> 00:31:32,507
Well, what mommy doesn't know
won't hurt her, okay, Mr. Tattletale?
633
00:31:32,549 --> 00:31:35,144
Eat it. Go on.
634
00:31:35,186 --> 00:31:37,177
Right out of the jar.
635
00:31:50,134 --> 00:31:52,466
It's okay.
636
00:31:54,037 --> 00:31:55,470
- Mmm.
- Mmm.
637
00:31:55,505 --> 00:31:58,031
- It's yummy, isn't it?
- This is fun.
638
00:31:58,075 --> 00:32:01,408
Yeah? This is fun. This is fun.
639
00:32:01,445 --> 00:32:05,710
And this fun meal has to
be our little secret, okay?
640
00:32:05,748 --> 00:32:07,716
Okay.
641
00:32:07,750 --> 00:32:08,944
Okay.
642
00:32:11,988 --> 00:32:13,751
Hey, you know, we can do
lots of fun things.
643
00:32:13,789 --> 00:32:16,349
We just have to be friends
and we have to trust each other.
644
00:32:16,392 --> 00:32:18,552
- Okay?
- Mmm-hmm.
645
00:32:20,795 --> 00:32:23,525
Maybe you should have a secret name too?
646
00:32:23,565 --> 00:32:25,897
- You want a secret name?
- Yeah, I want a secret name.
647
00:32:25,934 --> 00:32:28,061
Okay.
648
00:32:28,104 --> 00:32:30,833
How about Sponge Bob?
649
00:32:30,872 --> 00:32:32,500
- No, silly.
- No?
650
00:32:34,176 --> 00:32:37,976
All right, what about...
what about Grover?
651
00:32:38,013 --> 00:32:39,742
Grover, I love Grover.
652
00:32:39,781 --> 00:32:43,308
You do? All right. Grover it is.
653
00:32:47,521 --> 00:32:49,990
Where's my little munchkin?
654
00:32:50,025 --> 00:32:51,753
- Daddy! Daddy's home.
- Huh?
655
00:32:51,792 --> 00:32:55,785
- Yay, Daddy. Daddy's home.
- I hear him, I hear him.
656
00:32:55,829 --> 00:32:58,059
- Daddy!
- Oh, there he is!
657
00:32:58,098 --> 00:33:00,032
Oh my goodness, I'm sorry.
Are you a little monster?
658
00:33:00,067 --> 00:33:01,898
Remember what happens
to little monsters?
659
00:33:01,936 --> 00:33:03,233
- Come here for a minute.
- No, Daddy!
660
00:33:03,270 --> 00:33:05,670
You remember? What's wrong with you?
661
00:33:05,706 --> 00:33:07,298
- Daddy!
- Come here for a minute.
662
00:33:07,341 --> 00:33:09,969
You get viciously tickled.
You remember that?
663
00:33:10,010 --> 00:33:11,409
- Daddy, stop it.
- Huh? Hey.
664
00:33:11,445 --> 00:33:13,174
- You my little superstar?
- Yeah.
665
00:33:13,214 --> 00:33:15,511
Are you? Are you gonna
take over the world?
666
00:33:15,548 --> 00:33:17,641
Come on, answer me.
You gonna take over the world?
667
00:33:17,684 --> 00:33:19,675
- Yes.
- And when are you gonna do it?
668
00:33:19,719 --> 00:33:21,914
- Next year.
- Next year's not soon enough.
669
00:33:21,955 --> 00:33:25,015
Well, you must be Mr. X.
I'm the new nanny.
670
00:33:25,058 --> 00:33:27,549
Yeah. Keep him quiet tonight, will you?
671
00:33:27,594 --> 00:33:29,255
I've got a merger I'm working on.
672
00:33:29,295 --> 00:33:30,956
I don't get some
decent shut-eye tonight,
673
00:33:30,997 --> 00:33:32,692
somebody around here's
gonna be accountable.
674
00:33:32,732 --> 00:33:34,495
Daddy, come see my dinosaur!
675
00:33:34,533 --> 00:33:37,059
- Daddy's got work to do, buddy.
- Please?
676
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:44,734
Hey, Grayer, don't...
don't be sad. It's okay.
677
00:33:44,776 --> 00:33:47,870
Daddy's just tired.
678
00:33:49,315 --> 00:33:51,374
Grover.
679
00:33:53,785 --> 00:33:56,379
Hey, you want to finish our fun meal?
680
00:33:56,421 --> 00:33:59,447
Come on!
681
00:33:59,491 --> 00:34:01,459
Yeah.
682
00:34:03,395 --> 00:34:05,658
* Frere Jacques *
683
00:34:05,696 --> 00:34:07,392
* Frere Jacques *
684
00:34:07,432 --> 00:34:11,060
* Dormez vous, dormez vous *
685
00:34:11,103 --> 00:34:14,663
* Sonnez les matines,
sonnez les matines. *
686
00:34:14,705 --> 00:34:16,401
Nanny?
687
00:34:16,441 --> 00:34:17,771
Yeah, Grover?
688
00:34:20,044 --> 00:34:23,138
You'll never leave me
like Bertie, will you?
689
00:34:27,717 --> 00:34:30,584
- Grover, you know I...
- Promise?
690
00:34:34,058 --> 00:34:37,584
I'm not going anywhere.
You know that, right, honey?
691
00:34:40,797 --> 00:34:42,958
Right, Grove?
692
00:34:58,281 --> 00:35:00,340
* Oh beautiful... *
693
00:35:00,417 --> 00:35:02,146
Dear Nanny,
694
00:35:02,185 --> 00:35:04,812
please remember that
today is the 4th of July family party
695
00:35:04,853 --> 00:35:06,514
at Mr. X's office.
696
00:35:06,555 --> 00:35:09,683
It probably slipped your mind
that costumes are required,
697
00:35:09,725 --> 00:35:12,922
so I took it upon myself
to have some delivered.
698
00:35:12,961 --> 00:35:15,930
- This is itchy.
- I know, sweetheart.
699
00:35:15,964 --> 00:35:18,659
Why do we have to dress up?
700
00:35:18,700 --> 00:35:20,691
Freedom, Grove.
701
00:35:20,735 --> 00:35:23,296
It's all in the name of freedom.
702
00:35:23,339 --> 00:35:25,364
Hey, guys.
703
00:35:25,407 --> 00:35:27,772
- Who is that?
- That's the nanny, dear.
704
00:35:27,809 --> 00:35:30,370
- You've met her.
- What happened to Louisa?
705
00:35:31,846 --> 00:35:34,974
That was two nannies ago, silly.
706
00:35:35,016 --> 00:35:38,508
- Yeah.
- Daddy, I'm George Washington.
707
00:35:38,553 --> 00:35:40,111
- Okay.
- Tickle me.
708
00:35:40,154 --> 00:35:42,247
No, I understand that,
Dan, because the bastard's selling low.
709
00:35:42,290 --> 00:35:44,258
- Please!
- Grayer, come on, buddy.
710
00:35:44,292 --> 00:35:46,283
Cut it out, sit down.
711
00:35:46,327 --> 00:35:48,760
- Yes yes, we're coming.
- No, it's just my kid.
712
00:35:48,795 --> 00:35:50,423
- We're coming.
- Right.
713
00:35:50,465 --> 00:35:52,591
- Well no, that's what I was thinking...
- You want me to call...
714
00:35:52,632 --> 00:35:55,193
- Where's my card! Daddy!
- Your what?
715
00:35:55,236 --> 00:35:58,033
Where's my card! Oh, I wanna go home!
716
00:35:58,071 --> 00:35:59,834
Hey, smile, Grove.
We're gonna go to a party.
717
00:35:59,873 --> 00:36:02,933
That's not my card. Where's my card?
718
00:36:02,976 --> 00:36:04,773
Would you get off that phone
719
00:36:04,811 --> 00:36:07,041
and tell the nanny to
give him his damn card?
720
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,947
- Nanny?
- Turn the car around.
721
00:36:09,983 --> 00:36:12,178
- Talk to the nanny, please.
- Nanny, go back and get the card.
722
00:36:12,219 --> 00:36:14,743
Hold the elevator!
723
00:36:20,993 --> 00:36:23,120
I'm sorry.
724
00:36:23,162 --> 00:36:26,188
It's okay, don't be.
At least I'm fully dressed this time.
725
00:36:26,232 --> 00:36:28,291
So...
726
00:36:30,002 --> 00:36:31,663
I'm so sorry. It's not funny.
727
00:36:31,704 --> 00:36:34,298
I don't mean to be laughing.
728
00:36:34,340 --> 00:36:36,433
You look very patriotic.
729
00:36:36,475 --> 00:36:38,204
- Yeah.
- Let me hit your floor.
730
00:36:38,244 --> 00:36:39,710
Oh, that's okay. I got it.
731
00:36:39,744 --> 00:36:42,645
Didn't grow up with the staff
doing everything for me,
732
00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:45,081
- so...
- Neither did I.
733
00:36:46,551 --> 00:36:48,644
Really? You must have had
it really rough then.
734
00:36:48,686 --> 00:36:52,453
Okay, well, I'm glad
to give you a good laugh.
735
00:37:05,036 --> 00:37:08,096
My husband and I are
taking our second honeymoon
736
00:37:08,139 --> 00:37:10,198
in Provence.
737
00:37:12,009 --> 00:37:14,136
* When I dance they call me Macarena *
738
00:37:14,178 --> 00:37:16,578
* And the boys,
they say that I'm buena *
739
00:37:16,613 --> 00:37:18,945
* They all want me, they can't have me *
740
00:37:18,982 --> 00:37:21,507
* So they all come and dance beside me *
741
00:37:21,552 --> 00:37:23,679
* Move with me, jam with me... *
742
00:37:25,555 --> 00:37:27,922
I'm looking for Mr. X.
Have you seen him?
743
00:37:27,958 --> 00:37:29,983
No, sorry.
744
00:37:30,027 --> 00:37:32,018
Wouldn't know him if I did.
745
00:37:32,062 --> 00:37:34,394
* Macarena, hey, Macarena... *
746
00:37:34,431 --> 00:37:37,457
Grove, come on. What is wrong?
Why won't you shake your booty?
747
00:37:37,500 --> 00:37:39,492
'Cause I have to make a doodie.
748
00:37:39,535 --> 00:37:41,560
Oh. Come on.
749
00:37:51,747 --> 00:37:54,079
Hey, Grover, I think
the bathroom's the other way.
750
00:37:54,116 --> 00:37:56,549
- My daddy has one in his office.
- Yeah?
751
00:37:56,585 --> 00:37:59,020
- I wanna go to my daddy's bathroom.
- Okay.
752
00:38:05,827 --> 00:38:08,694
- Oh.
- Why is Daddy tickling that lady?
753
00:38:08,730 --> 00:38:10,527
I'm sorry.
754
00:38:10,565 --> 00:38:12,726
Grayer just had to use the bathroom.
755
00:38:14,669 --> 00:38:17,137
So use it already.
756
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:21,838
Hello, Grayer. Remember me?
757
00:38:21,877 --> 00:38:23,844
I work with your daddy
in the Chicago office.
758
00:38:23,878 --> 00:38:26,711
Let go. I have to make a doodie.
759
00:38:26,747 --> 00:38:28,079
Oh.
760
00:38:32,853 --> 00:38:36,186
So, you must be the nanny.
761
00:38:36,223 --> 00:38:39,624
Uh, yes, I...
762
00:38:39,660 --> 00:38:43,595
I'll get out of your...
I'll wait in the hall.
763
00:38:47,101 --> 00:38:48,727
So sorry.
764
00:38:55,942 --> 00:38:58,001
Grayer, hurry up. Your mom's coming.
765
00:38:58,044 --> 00:39:01,275
Sweetie, did Grayer hear
from the waiting-list committee yet?
766
00:39:01,314 --> 00:39:03,077
No, why?
767
00:39:03,116 --> 00:39:04,981
Oh, I'm sure it doesn't mean anything,
768
00:39:05,018 --> 00:39:06,747
but the Bairds did and Darwin got in.
769
00:39:11,190 --> 00:39:14,625
Please don't say anything about
Collegiate or Darwin to my husband.
770
00:39:14,660 --> 00:39:16,651
Sure.
771
00:39:20,065 --> 00:39:22,533
- Oh, hi, pumpkin.
- There you are.
772
00:39:22,568 --> 00:39:24,968
Oh, you've met before in Chicago, right?
773
00:39:25,003 --> 00:39:26,437
- Yes, hello.
- Lovely to see you.
774
00:39:26,472 --> 00:39:28,564
- Nice to see you as well.
- Excuse me. Thanks again.
775
00:39:28,607 --> 00:39:30,302
- Mm-hm.
- Where have you been?
776
00:39:30,342 --> 00:39:32,105
Making calls. Where's the chow?
777
00:39:32,144 --> 00:39:34,078
- The entire time?
- Yeah.
778
00:39:39,117 --> 00:39:42,517
Male monogamy remains an elusive,
779
00:39:42,553 --> 00:39:44,783
yet much mythologized practice
780
00:39:44,822 --> 00:39:46,450
throughout the world.
781
00:39:46,491 --> 00:39:48,958
In many Bedouin tribes,
782
00:39:48,993 --> 00:39:52,690
powerful men are encouraged
to take multiple wives.
783
00:39:53,931 --> 00:39:55,831
In contemporary France,
784
00:39:55,866 --> 00:39:57,800
mistresses are de rigueur
785
00:39:57,835 --> 00:40:00,326
and quietly tolerated.
786
00:40:00,371 --> 00:40:02,999
But for the women
of the Upper East Side,
787
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:07,067
adultery is pathologically ignored.
788
00:40:08,778 --> 00:40:11,747
Nobody warned me we were going
to have a therapy session.
789
00:40:11,815 --> 00:40:14,682
It's just that I didn't see
you at all at the party.
790
00:40:14,718 --> 00:40:17,687
Well, I was trying to
sneak in a little work.
791
00:40:17,721 --> 00:40:20,418
Okay? Forgive me for making a living.
792
00:40:20,458 --> 00:40:24,052
But everybody else was participating.
793
00:40:24,094 --> 00:40:28,497
Everybody else doesn't pull
down what I do every year.
794
00:40:28,530 --> 00:40:31,398
I had my family there
and I was present and accounted for.
795
00:40:31,434 --> 00:40:34,426
So now, you know, I would really
appreciate a moment of peace and quiet.
796
00:40:34,471 --> 00:40:35,994
'Cause frankly, I'm exhausted.
797
00:40:38,341 --> 00:40:40,535
Bonjour, Pierre.
798
00:40:40,576 --> 00:40:42,635
Bonjour.
799
00:40:42,678 --> 00:40:45,977
Comment allez-vous?
800
00:40:49,084 --> 00:40:50,381
Bien, merci.
801
00:40:50,419 --> 00:40:52,216
Et vous?
802
00:40:52,254 --> 00:40:55,815
Ah, comme ci comme ca.
803
00:40:59,428 --> 00:41:01,487
Okay, I got a great idea.
804
00:41:01,529 --> 00:41:05,466
Let's pretend that we're in a cave.
805
00:41:05,500 --> 00:41:07,900
You know what, Nanny?
806
00:41:07,935 --> 00:41:09,562
What, Grove?
807
00:41:09,604 --> 00:41:12,038
I love you best.
808
00:41:14,108 --> 00:41:17,077
The other nannies
had warned me about this very moment,
809
00:41:17,111 --> 00:41:19,102
the moment when you'll
be tempted to break
810
00:41:19,147 --> 00:41:21,115
the cardinal rule of nannydom.
811
00:41:21,149 --> 00:41:26,052
And yet, staring into those big,
sad, searching eyes,
812
00:41:26,087 --> 00:41:29,079
I simply couldn't resist.
813
00:41:29,123 --> 00:41:31,489
I love you too, Grove.
814
00:41:33,527 --> 00:41:37,930
Three little words made leaving
this job 1,000 times harder.
815
00:41:37,964 --> 00:41:39,727
...hear a thing I have to say!
816
00:41:39,766 --> 00:41:42,394
I know that you work hard. I just think
817
00:41:42,436 --> 00:41:46,839
that if... if we're
gonna have more children...
818
00:41:46,873 --> 00:41:49,933
Well, maybe you should
focus on the one you already have.
819
00:41:49,976 --> 00:41:53,070
'Cause you can barely
handle him as it is.
820
00:41:54,580 --> 00:41:56,605
Why are you so cruel to me?
821
00:41:56,649 --> 00:41:58,447
- Why?
- Why are you so cruel?
822
00:41:58,485 --> 00:42:01,146
Because I cannot take
the additional pressure.
823
00:42:01,187 --> 00:42:04,520
You know something? I think that
I am going to go out to Chicago
824
00:42:04,557 --> 00:42:07,025
- until this merger is finished.
- Will you stop it, please?
825
00:42:07,059 --> 00:42:09,892
And I certainly hope that
you're in a better mood...
826
00:42:09,929 --> 00:42:13,228
- Please, stop it.
...when I come back. All right?
827
00:42:13,265 --> 00:42:15,426
If I come back!
828
00:42:28,980 --> 00:42:33,041
Nanny, this is yours, is it not?
829
00:42:38,256 --> 00:42:41,316
Uh... no, l...
830
00:42:41,359 --> 00:42:43,156
no, I don't know what that is.
831
00:42:43,194 --> 00:42:46,254
It was in our laundry.
832
00:42:46,297 --> 00:42:49,391
It is not mine, it is not Mr. X's,
833
00:42:49,434 --> 00:42:52,095
so it has to be yours, right?
834
00:42:53,604 --> 00:42:56,232
Right?
835
00:42:56,273 --> 00:42:58,264
Yes, it's mine.
836
00:43:00,310 --> 00:43:03,438
Please don't leave your personal items
lying around the house again.
837
00:43:05,215 --> 00:43:07,149
I... I won't.
838
00:43:07,184 --> 00:43:09,845
- I promise. I'm sorry.
- Apology accepted.
839
00:43:19,629 --> 00:43:22,120
I don't mean...
840
00:43:22,165 --> 00:43:25,032
to be a control freak.
841
00:43:28,738 --> 00:43:33,606
It's... it's just that when Mr. X
is in the middle of a big deal,
842
00:43:33,642 --> 00:43:35,906
it can be very hard on me.
843
00:43:38,780 --> 00:43:40,941
I understand.
844
00:43:52,894 --> 00:43:55,829
How is Grayer doing?
845
00:43:55,864 --> 00:43:58,025
Grayer?
846
00:43:58,066 --> 00:44:00,898
He's... he's fine.
847
00:44:00,935 --> 00:44:03,461
He's great.
848
00:44:03,504 --> 00:44:05,370
That's good to hear.
849
00:44:05,407 --> 00:44:08,967
He really is
a wonderful child, isn't he?
850
00:44:13,047 --> 00:44:15,447
He's the best.
851
00:44:15,482 --> 00:44:18,417
He's... he's such a sweet...
852
00:44:18,452 --> 00:44:20,578
Okay, good night then.
853
00:44:26,726 --> 00:44:28,853
Dear Nanny, I know it's Sunday
854
00:44:28,895 --> 00:44:30,420
and you requested a day off,
855
00:44:30,464 --> 00:44:32,522
but I desperately need to sleep in.
856
00:44:32,565 --> 00:44:34,795
I have a very long afternoon today
857
00:44:34,834 --> 00:44:36,927
tasting caterers for our benefit,
858
00:44:36,970 --> 00:44:39,632
"Conga for the Congo."
Please don't wake me
859
00:44:39,672 --> 00:44:42,072
unless Mr. X calls from Chicago.
860
00:44:42,108 --> 00:44:43,700
And most importantly,
861
00:44:43,743 --> 00:44:46,211
find a way to keep the boy quiet.
862
00:44:46,246 --> 00:44:48,373
Why don't they just
muzzle the kid already?
863
00:44:48,414 --> 00:44:49,881
What's a muzzle?
864
00:44:49,916 --> 00:44:53,612
Scrambled for you
and Cheerios for the boy.
865
00:44:53,652 --> 00:44:55,950
Mommy doesn't allow me
to eat sugar cereal.
866
00:44:55,988 --> 00:44:57,956
Cheerios are sugar-free.
867
00:44:57,990 --> 00:45:00,652
Low in sugar isn't
the same as sugar-free.
868
00:45:00,692 --> 00:45:02,250
Grover, just eat it.
869
00:45:05,564 --> 00:45:07,122
Is that caffeinated?
870
00:45:07,165 --> 00:45:09,190
Mommy doesn't use caffeine.
871
00:45:09,234 --> 00:45:11,531
That's because Mommy sleeps till noon.
872
00:45:11,569 --> 00:45:13,868
Perhaps it might be a nice morning
873
00:45:13,906 --> 00:45:16,101
to do something educational with Grayer,
874
00:45:16,141 --> 00:45:18,166
like the Pissarro show
at the Guggenheim.
875
00:45:18,210 --> 00:45:21,042
Mommy said you're supposed to take
me to her favorite museum,
876
00:45:21,079 --> 00:45:22,444
the "Guggyheiny."
877
00:45:22,481 --> 00:45:24,210
Well, since today was
supposed to be my day off,
878
00:45:24,249 --> 00:45:26,808
we're gonna go to my favorite,
the Museum of Natural History.
879
00:45:26,851 --> 00:45:29,115
- Isn't that on the West Side?
- Yeah, so?
880
00:45:29,153 --> 00:45:32,145
I'm not allowed to go on the West Side.
That's a rule.
881
00:45:32,189 --> 00:45:35,886
Well, today just happens to
be break-the-rules day.
882
00:45:35,927 --> 00:45:38,088
Oh.
883
00:45:45,303 --> 00:45:47,668
Hi. Two please.
884
00:46:18,567 --> 00:46:20,967
Hey, you know what
the biggest word in America is?
885
00:46:21,003 --> 00:46:22,129
What?
886
00:46:22,171 --> 00:46:25,334
Anti... antidisestablishmentarianism.
887
00:46:25,374 --> 00:46:27,534
Hey, that's pretty good, Grove.
888
00:46:27,575 --> 00:46:29,441
Actually, I know a longer word.
889
00:46:29,478 --> 00:46:31,946
- There is no longer word.
- Yes, there is.
890
00:46:31,981 --> 00:46:34,472
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
891
00:46:34,515 --> 00:46:36,710
Wow. What does that mean?
892
00:46:36,751 --> 00:46:39,777
Come on inside. Let me show you.
893
00:46:39,821 --> 00:46:43,052
"The apatosaurus, formerly
known as the brontosaurus,
894
00:46:43,091 --> 00:46:45,356
is from a family of
enormous herbivores."
895
00:46:45,394 --> 00:46:47,793
Herbivores means vegetarian.
896
00:46:47,829 --> 00:46:49,626
Like Mommy, you know?
897
00:46:49,664 --> 00:46:51,689
What's that over there?
898
00:46:54,534 --> 00:46:57,060
That is the T-rex.
899
00:46:57,105 --> 00:46:59,698
- Is that one like Mommy too?
- Hmm.
900
00:46:59,740 --> 00:47:02,538
I wish my ancestors made totem poles.
901
00:47:02,576 --> 00:47:04,477
Well, they did.
That one looks just like you.
902
00:47:04,511 --> 00:47:05,671
It does.
903
00:47:05,712 --> 00:47:07,009
Well, that guy has a big...
904
00:47:07,047 --> 00:47:09,242
It's hanging.
905
00:47:13,553 --> 00:47:15,521
Cool. What are they?
906
00:47:15,555 --> 00:47:17,147
They're a Matis family.
907
00:47:17,190 --> 00:47:19,158
They live in the Amazon.
908
00:47:19,192 --> 00:47:21,557
Which one's the nanny?
909
00:47:21,594 --> 00:47:25,655
She has the day off. Things are
different in that part of the world.
910
00:47:27,367 --> 00:47:29,596
And Nanny, one last thing
911
00:47:29,635 --> 00:47:32,298
before you take the rest of the day off:
912
00:47:32,339 --> 00:47:35,501
Do you think you could
manage a quick shop for me?
913
00:47:39,745 --> 00:47:41,713
- I'll help.
- No, it's okay, Grayer.
914
00:47:41,747 --> 00:47:44,181
Don't. Grayer, don't... don't!
915
00:47:44,216 --> 00:47:45,911
God!
916
00:47:45,951 --> 00:47:47,942
Mommy!
917
00:47:47,987 --> 00:47:50,546
What a mess.
918
00:47:50,588 --> 00:47:53,319
Really, Nanny, I don't know
why you didn't leave all this
919
00:47:53,359 --> 00:47:55,452
downstairs with Manuel to store.
920
00:47:55,494 --> 00:47:58,463
I mean, am I supposed to have this lying
around the apartment till the benefit?
921
00:47:58,497 --> 00:48:01,624
No no no, of course not. I... I'm gonna
bring it down to him right now.
922
00:48:01,666 --> 00:48:04,294
There's no time now.
923
00:48:04,335 --> 00:48:06,860
I need you to get ready for the Nanny
Conflict Resolution Seminar
924
00:48:06,905 --> 00:48:08,702
at the Parents' Society.
925
00:48:08,740 --> 00:48:11,470
I totally forgot it was this evening.
926
00:48:11,508 --> 00:48:13,738
Um...
927
00:48:19,350 --> 00:48:21,817
Mrs. X, I...
928
00:48:21,852 --> 00:48:24,013
don't know if you remember,
929
00:48:24,054 --> 00:48:26,215
but l... I was supposed
to have the evening off.
930
00:48:26,256 --> 00:48:28,656
And I made plans.
931
00:48:32,262 --> 00:48:34,321
The entire point of the seminar
932
00:48:34,364 --> 00:48:36,389
is that everybody brings their nanny.
933
00:48:37,801 --> 00:48:40,269
Are you suggesting I attend it alone?
934
00:48:40,304 --> 00:48:42,737
Huh-uh. No.
935
00:48:42,772 --> 00:48:44,899
I was just...
936
00:48:44,941 --> 00:48:46,602
I was confused.
937
00:48:46,642 --> 00:48:50,340
So, I will cancel my plans.
938
00:48:50,380 --> 00:48:52,779
I'd appreciate it.
939
00:48:57,320 --> 00:49:00,915
Does anyone have
an extra diaper I can use?
940
00:49:00,957 --> 00:49:03,686
Stop eating them boogers!
941
00:49:03,726 --> 00:49:07,127
Grayer, no nudity. Please.
942
00:49:07,163 --> 00:49:09,290
Of course you feel anxiety
943
00:49:09,332 --> 00:49:11,959
when leaving your kids with strangers.
944
00:49:12,000 --> 00:49:14,265
You're moms. Okay...
945
00:49:14,303 --> 00:49:16,770
now what I would love to do
946
00:49:16,805 --> 00:49:19,000
is bring in the nannies.
947
00:49:19,040 --> 00:49:21,531
Linda, Gillian, would you
mind monitoring the children
948
00:49:21,576 --> 00:49:23,601
so that the nannies can join us in here?
949
00:49:23,645 --> 00:49:26,113
Okay, listen, I want to see
you all here next week.
950
00:49:26,148 --> 00:49:28,615
The seminar is called
"Sexy Mom, Happy Mom."
951
00:49:28,649 --> 00:49:31,141
lt's gonna be a hot one.
952
00:49:31,186 --> 00:49:33,051
Nannies, we're ready.
953
00:49:33,088 --> 00:49:35,181
Right this way, ladies.
954
00:49:35,223 --> 00:49:37,747
All right, here they are...
955
00:49:37,791 --> 00:49:40,386
the nannies! Wonderful. Come on in.
956
00:49:40,428 --> 00:49:43,885
Just... just file against this wall.
Just squeeze in.
957
00:49:43,931 --> 00:49:46,126
But... but be comfortable.
958
00:49:46,167 --> 00:49:48,931
Terrific. Now that we're all together,
959
00:49:48,969 --> 00:49:51,802
I think it's time to address
the reason for this seminar:
960
00:49:51,839 --> 00:49:55,638
Improving nanny-mom communication.
961
00:49:55,675 --> 00:49:59,407
To begin, I would like a mom volunteer
962
00:49:59,446 --> 00:50:02,142
to offer the group
one particular example
963
00:50:02,183 --> 00:50:04,151
of failed communication with your nanny.
964
00:50:04,185 --> 00:50:06,176
Most of them barely speak English.
965
00:50:06,220 --> 00:50:09,017
- That's the problem.
- Okay, you.
966
00:50:09,055 --> 00:50:11,819
My nanny keeps on singing
religious songs to Parker
967
00:50:11,858 --> 00:50:14,759
even though I have told her
time and time again that we're agnostic.
968
00:50:14,794 --> 00:50:17,319
And what's worse,
every time I confront her
969
00:50:17,363 --> 00:50:20,491
she flatly denies it,
even after I provided her
970
00:50:20,532 --> 00:50:22,194
with evidence from the Nanny Cam.
971
00:50:22,235 --> 00:50:25,567
Nanny Cam?
I thought that was an urban myth.
972
00:50:25,604 --> 00:50:27,470
That's my nanny over there.
973
00:50:27,506 --> 00:50:30,499
Will you please ask her
if she's trying to convert my child?
974
00:50:30,542 --> 00:50:34,205
No. Right now we're just hearing issues.
975
00:50:34,247 --> 00:50:38,205
Okay. Next I would like
to hear from a nanny.
976
00:50:38,250 --> 00:50:40,548
Can I have a nanny volunteer?
977
00:50:40,586 --> 00:50:42,519
Anyone?
978
00:50:42,554 --> 00:50:44,078
Por favor?
979
00:50:44,122 --> 00:50:47,522
Come on, don't be shy.
980
00:50:47,558 --> 00:50:50,789
We won't bite.
981
00:50:50,828 --> 00:50:53,024
Okay, how about you, young lady?
982
00:50:53,065 --> 00:50:54,793
- Me?
- Yeah, you.
983
00:50:54,832 --> 00:50:58,394
Can you share with the group
one particular grievance
984
00:50:58,437 --> 00:51:01,701
that you might have about your job?
985
00:51:01,739 --> 00:51:03,401
Come on.
986
00:51:03,442 --> 00:51:06,808
No no, l-l... I love my job.
987
00:51:06,844 --> 00:51:09,870
I do. I feel... I feel kinda lucky.
988
00:51:09,914 --> 00:51:11,711
Oh, that's very nice,
989
00:51:11,749 --> 00:51:13,979
but neither helpful nor productive.
990
00:51:14,018 --> 00:51:17,215
So can you please offer
the class something useful? Come on.
991
00:51:19,023 --> 00:51:22,549
- Well...
- Yeah?
992
00:51:22,592 --> 00:51:26,119
It would be nice to
have a night off, I guess.
993
00:51:26,162 --> 00:51:28,187
Uh-huh.
994
00:51:28,231 --> 00:51:32,031
We... we have been a little
preoccupied with our benefit.
995
00:51:33,703 --> 00:51:35,602
But all she has to do is ask.
996
00:51:35,639 --> 00:51:38,539
Uh-huh-huh-huh. See, ladies?
997
00:51:38,574 --> 00:51:41,043
Conflict resolved.
998
00:51:51,020 --> 00:51:53,113
- I'm taking him.
- Oh no, I can take him.
999
00:51:53,155 --> 00:51:55,123
- No, it's all right.
- No, I can... I can take him.
1000
00:51:55,157 --> 00:51:58,649
Nanny, please. I want you to go out.
1001
00:51:58,694 --> 00:52:01,594
It's only 9:00.
You clearly wanted the evening off.
1002
00:52:01,630 --> 00:52:04,224
No... no, you must be
exhausted, let me put him to bed.
1003
00:52:04,266 --> 00:52:06,496
We'll manage fine. Here.
1004
00:52:06,534 --> 00:52:08,525
Have a blast.
1005
00:52:17,346 --> 00:52:19,779
I just don't understand it.
1006
00:52:22,083 --> 00:52:25,450
I... I just don't understand
how someone can have everything
1007
00:52:25,486 --> 00:52:27,716
and still be...
1008
00:52:27,755 --> 00:52:30,349
so miserable.
1009
00:52:31,692 --> 00:52:33,660
Anyway...
1010
00:52:33,694 --> 00:52:37,131
remember I was telling you
I went to this orientation mixer thingy?
1011
00:52:37,165 --> 00:52:39,792
I met this guy who
likes the same exact...
1012
00:52:39,833 --> 00:52:43,667
It's like she dumps all of her problems
with her husband onto me.
1013
00:52:43,704 --> 00:52:46,673
It's called denial.
Okay, like the river.
1014
00:52:46,707 --> 00:52:49,403
And you obviously have
become her enabler.
1015
00:52:49,443 --> 00:52:51,240
What? What the hell
is that supposed to mean?
1016
00:52:51,278 --> 00:52:53,906
It means, can you stop talking about
this woman for five minutes please?
1017
00:52:53,947 --> 00:52:56,744
Well, I'm sorry I'm boring you, Lynette,
but this is my life right now.
1018
00:52:56,783 --> 00:52:59,081
I have a life too,
in case you haven't noticed.
1019
00:52:59,119 --> 00:53:01,678
And I'm starting to think
you and that lady
1020
00:53:01,721 --> 00:53:03,518
are kindred spirits.
1021
00:53:05,292 --> 00:53:07,987
You know what? NYU should give you
your diploma right now.
1022
00:53:08,027 --> 00:53:10,052
- You've got all the answers.
- Okay okay.
1023
00:53:10,096 --> 00:53:12,564
Okay, let's forget that... forget that.
1024
00:53:12,598 --> 00:53:15,658
Can we at least try to have a good time?
1025
00:53:15,701 --> 00:53:17,999
Since you did drag me above 14th Street.
1026
00:53:18,037 --> 00:53:19,061
Mmh.
1027
00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:22,602
Come on, Annie. This place,
1028
00:53:22,640 --> 00:53:24,370
you have to admit, it's...
1029
00:53:24,410 --> 00:53:26,275
hmm, tired.
1030
00:53:26,312 --> 00:53:28,677
Look at these guys over there.
1031
00:53:28,713 --> 00:53:31,079
They don't have any piercings,
1032
00:53:31,117 --> 00:53:32,448
no tattoos. I mean...
1033
00:53:32,485 --> 00:53:34,008
Oh my God.
1034
00:53:34,052 --> 00:53:36,213
- We have to go right now.
- Wha... why?
1035
00:53:36,254 --> 00:53:39,189
- Wait a minute.
- The guy I told you about is here.
1036
00:53:39,224 --> 00:53:40,714
Harvard Hottie?
1037
00:53:40,759 --> 00:53:43,421
- Mmm.
- Which one? Which one, where?
1038
00:53:43,461 --> 00:53:47,124
Yankees cap, blue shirt, blue blood.
1039
00:53:47,165 --> 00:53:49,564
Mmm. He is gorgeous.
1040
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:50,898
Yeah, okay, let's go.
1041
00:53:50,935 --> 00:53:52,731
No no no, are you out of your mind?
You kidding me?
1042
00:53:52,770 --> 00:53:54,601
No, I'm out of my league, okay?
1043
00:53:54,638 --> 00:53:56,037
Let's go.
1044
00:53:56,074 --> 00:53:57,904
Oops.
1045
00:53:59,910 --> 00:54:01,469
What the hell are you doing?
1046
00:54:01,512 --> 00:54:04,572
Oh my God, I know that girl. Annie!
1047
00:54:04,615 --> 00:54:06,606
Annie!
1048
00:54:06,650 --> 00:54:08,277
Come on, have a drink with him already.
1049
00:54:08,318 --> 00:54:10,615
I told you, I can't date on the job.
1050
00:54:10,654 --> 00:54:12,986
Are you gonna use this job as an excuse
for everything or what?
1051
00:54:13,023 --> 00:54:14,115
Say hello to the nice fella.
1052
00:54:14,158 --> 00:54:16,319
- Hey.
- Guys, this is Annie.
1053
00:54:16,360 --> 00:54:17,952
I don't know your name. I'm sorry.
1054
00:54:17,995 --> 00:54:20,122
- Oh, Lynette.
- Hi, how are you? Nice to meet you.
1055
00:54:20,164 --> 00:54:22,859
Some buddies from high school...
this is Carter, Jojo,
1056
00:54:22,899 --> 00:54:25,834
- John, Kenny, Reggie.
- Hello.
1057
00:54:25,868 --> 00:54:27,563
- Nice to meet you.
- Sit, grab a chair.
1058
00:54:27,603 --> 00:54:29,798
- Oh no, we can't.
- We'd love to.
1059
00:54:30,807 --> 00:54:32,900
Yeah.
1060
00:54:34,210 --> 00:54:38,203
So, girls, tell us,
how do you know our boy here?
1061
00:54:38,247 --> 00:54:42,343
Oh, I really don't know him.
He's Annie's friend.
1062
00:54:44,020 --> 00:54:46,988
I know him from work.
1063
00:54:47,022 --> 00:54:50,322
Oh yeah? What kind of work do you do?
1064
00:54:50,359 --> 00:54:53,156
Model?
1065
00:54:53,195 --> 00:54:56,187
- Stewardess?
- Escort?
1066
00:54:57,632 --> 00:54:59,862
She works for someone in my building.
1067
00:54:59,901 --> 00:55:01,732
Oh.
1068
00:55:01,770 --> 00:55:03,169
Actually, I'm a nanny.
1069
00:55:03,205 --> 00:55:05,969
A nanny?
1070
00:55:06,007 --> 00:55:07,998
Dude!
1071
00:55:08,043 --> 00:55:10,409
You didn't tell us you knew a nanny.
1072
00:55:10,445 --> 00:55:12,776
That is so porno.
1073
00:55:12,813 --> 00:55:14,508
- Are the moms hot?
- Guys.
1074
00:55:14,548 --> 00:55:17,642
- Are you hot for the dads?
- Are the dads hot for you?
1075
00:55:17,685 --> 00:55:20,245
- Hey, come on.
- You want to know about the dads?
1076
00:55:20,287 --> 00:55:22,949
I'll tell you about the dads.
1077
00:55:22,990 --> 00:55:25,083
They're chubby, bald, steak-eating,
1078
00:55:25,125 --> 00:55:26,990
cigar-smoking, type-A pigs
1079
00:55:27,027 --> 00:55:30,463
who get more turned on by the Bloomberg
Wire than they do by any hot nannies.
1080
00:55:30,498 --> 00:55:34,264
Actually, it's all of you
in about five years.
1081
00:55:34,301 --> 00:55:36,269
So take it from me, guys: Enjoy tonight,
1082
00:55:36,303 --> 00:55:39,238
because your future looks
pretty fucking bleak.
1083
00:55:39,273 --> 00:55:40,899
- Wait.
- God!
1084
00:55:44,777 --> 00:55:47,474
Stupid stupid.
1085
00:55:51,017 --> 00:55:53,610
You have two new messages.
1086
00:55:53,653 --> 00:55:55,883
Hey, Annie, it's me,
1087
00:55:55,922 --> 00:55:58,651
the... the big jerk from the bar.
1088
00:55:58,690 --> 00:56:00,158
- What?
- Listen...
1089
00:56:00,193 --> 00:56:02,058
in case you're wondering,
your friend Lynette
1090
00:56:02,095 --> 00:56:03,755
- gave me your home number.
- Ex-friend.
1091
00:56:03,795 --> 00:56:05,592
I obviously owe you a major apology.
1092
00:56:05,631 --> 00:56:07,895
Please just don't judge me
by my loser friends.
1093
00:56:07,933 --> 00:56:09,560
- Mm-hm.
- They were pretty hammered.
1094
00:56:09,601 --> 00:56:11,728
Anyway, I want you to
give me an opportunity
1095
00:56:11,770 --> 00:56:14,068
to redeem myself by taking you out.
1096
00:56:14,106 --> 00:56:16,074
And I'm warning you,
I won't take no for an answer.
1097
00:56:16,108 --> 00:56:18,906
I know where you live, so I'll camp out
at your door if I have to.
1098
00:56:18,944 --> 00:56:20,809
You really might as well
just get this over with.
1099
00:56:20,846 --> 00:56:22,473
And if you really hate me after that...
1100
00:56:22,513 --> 00:56:24,482
I'll... I'll never ask you again.
1101
00:56:24,515 --> 00:56:27,280
Okay, I'm sorry to ramble.
If I don't hear from you,
1102
00:56:27,319 --> 00:56:29,378
I'll ride the elevator till I find you.
1103
00:56:29,421 --> 00:56:30,614
Bye.
1104
00:56:32,823 --> 00:56:34,848
I am so screwed.
1105
00:56:36,093 --> 00:56:38,027
Annie, it's your mother.
1106
00:56:38,062 --> 00:56:41,327
Look, I'm sorry that I didn't
call last night, okay?
1107
00:56:41,365 --> 00:56:43,765
I had a really late night.
But about tonight...
1108
00:56:43,801 --> 00:56:47,100
Okay, you know what?
I don't want to hear it. I'm coming.
1109
00:56:47,138 --> 00:56:48,969
- I am coming.
- All right, fine.
1110
00:56:49,006 --> 00:56:50,871
Fine... okay, let me...
1111
00:56:50,908 --> 00:56:52,807
let me just call you
after this play date, okay?
1112
00:56:52,842 --> 00:56:54,867
Play date? What the hell is a play date?
1113
00:56:54,911 --> 00:56:58,904
- Oh shit.
- You said a curse!
1114
00:56:58,949 --> 00:57:02,351
Um, you know, Mom. A play date...
1115
00:57:02,386 --> 00:57:05,946
it's the meeting of
preliminary investment schedules.
1116
00:57:05,989 --> 00:57:08,685
Look, I'll call you later, okay?
1117
00:57:08,725 --> 00:57:11,785
All right. Bye.
1118
00:57:14,164 --> 00:57:16,223
Who lives here?
1119
00:57:16,266 --> 00:57:18,461
Some kid named Jefferson.
1120
00:57:18,500 --> 00:57:21,231
Your mom found him
with the Park Avenue play-date service.
1121
00:57:21,271 --> 00:57:23,067
Hi, y'all.
1122
00:57:23,139 --> 00:57:26,130
I'm Jefferson's mama Tanya.
1123
00:57:26,175 --> 00:57:27,506
Come on in.
1124
00:57:27,543 --> 00:57:30,273
We're baking a cake.
1125
00:57:30,312 --> 00:57:32,075
Oh my God.
1126
00:57:32,114 --> 00:57:34,776
Come on, y'all!
1127
00:57:34,817 --> 00:57:37,012
I pretend to be Jefferson's nanny.
1128
00:57:37,052 --> 00:57:40,249
But I was really hired to watch her.
1129
00:57:40,289 --> 00:57:42,416
Yoo-hooo!
1130
00:57:42,458 --> 00:57:45,154
And this is what she's
like after Betty Ford.
1131
00:57:45,194 --> 00:57:47,923
- Oh!
- Doesn't her husband care?
1132
00:57:47,962 --> 00:57:51,490
- Whoo!
- He's 75. She's an ex-showgirl.
1133
00:57:51,532 --> 00:57:54,933
He's not complaining about anything.
1134
00:57:54,969 --> 00:57:56,460
Frosting fun! Yay!
1135
00:57:58,439 --> 00:58:01,840
I want to come here every day.
1136
00:58:03,543 --> 00:58:05,409
Hey.
1137
00:58:08,049 --> 00:58:09,572
What are you doing here?
1138
00:58:11,585 --> 00:58:13,678
And what is all over you?
1139
00:58:13,720 --> 00:58:17,520
Annie, will you tell me
what the hell is going on?
1140
00:58:17,557 --> 00:58:20,253
All right, listen up, people.
This is my apartment.
1141
00:58:20,293 --> 00:58:23,057
And my roommate Lisa is away
1142
00:58:23,096 --> 00:58:25,064
on... on business.
1143
00:58:25,098 --> 00:58:28,295
You are... oh, just visiting.
1144
00:58:28,335 --> 00:58:30,632
- He is...
- Lynette's new boyfriend.
1145
00:58:30,670 --> 00:58:32,298
- Fine.
- I love your friends.
1146
00:58:32,339 --> 00:58:34,068
What twisted game are we playing here?
1147
00:58:34,107 --> 00:58:36,405
We're playing the my-mom-is-coming-over-
1148
00:58:36,443 --> 00:58:38,637
and-if-she-finds-out-I'm-a-nanny-
then-I'm-screwed game.
1149
00:58:38,678 --> 00:58:41,341
I love it. Hey, should I whip up
a fondue for Mom?
1150
00:58:41,381 --> 00:58:43,507
Um, well, you know what?
If you're gonna play it straight,
1151
00:58:43,549 --> 00:58:45,244
I would make it meatloaf.
I'm gonna borrow this.
1152
00:58:45,285 --> 00:58:47,412
That's my dress.
You can't borrow that dress.
1153
00:58:47,454 --> 00:58:49,318
It's a terrible dress.
1154
00:58:49,355 --> 00:58:51,515
Fondue? Go get my dress.
1155
00:58:53,092 --> 00:58:56,357
Oh boy, Calvin.
Thank you so much. That looks delicious.
1156
00:58:56,395 --> 00:59:00,456
It's so festively presented too.
1157
00:59:02,134 --> 00:59:06,900
So, how did you and Lynette meet?
1158
00:59:08,073 --> 00:59:11,873
Annie's roommate Lisa introduced us.
1159
00:59:11,910 --> 00:59:14,538
It's a shame she's not here.
1160
00:59:14,579 --> 00:59:16,979
I used to date her too.
1161
00:59:17,015 --> 00:59:19,574
Really?
1162
00:59:19,617 --> 00:59:22,517
So...
1163
00:59:22,553 --> 00:59:24,783
don't you just love Annie's new place?
1164
00:59:24,823 --> 00:59:27,257
- Mm-hm.
- We do.
1165
00:59:27,292 --> 00:59:29,487
We're here all the time.
1166
00:59:29,526 --> 00:59:32,893
Yeah, I think it's very...
very interesting.
1167
00:59:32,930 --> 00:59:34,921
- It's a little small, but...
- Mmm.
1168
00:59:34,965 --> 00:59:37,491
...it's a fine steppingstone, honey.
1169
00:59:39,369 --> 00:59:42,133
It's work. I'll take that.
1170
00:59:44,608 --> 00:59:47,975
Well, certainly keeping her busy.
1171
00:59:48,011 --> 00:59:49,273
- Very busy.
- Mm-hm.
1172
00:59:49,313 --> 00:59:51,008
- Busy bee.
- Relentlessly.
1173
00:59:51,048 --> 00:59:53,515
- Round the clock.
- Hello?
1174
00:59:53,549 --> 00:59:56,485
This isn't a brontosaurus.
You don't know anything.
1175
00:59:56,519 --> 00:59:59,818
Oh, Grayer! Please!
1176
00:59:59,856 --> 01:00:02,882
It is yoga hour
and Mommy's on the phone.
1177
01:00:02,925 --> 01:00:04,017
Hello?
1178
01:00:04,060 --> 01:00:05,994
Yes, hi. It's me.
1179
01:00:06,028 --> 01:00:08,258
I... I know that I agreed to let you
1180
01:00:08,297 --> 01:00:10,492
visit your grandmother in
the hospital tonight,
1181
01:00:10,532 --> 01:00:13,832
but I feel I need to remind you
that tomorrow is Grayer's birthday.
1182
01:00:13,870 --> 01:00:16,862
What? How can that be?
His party isn't until next month.
1183
01:00:16,906 --> 01:00:18,702
Well, we scheduled it
that way on purpose
1184
01:00:18,740 --> 01:00:21,266
because the party planner
I wanted wasn't available.
1185
01:00:21,310 --> 01:00:23,937
Neither was my husband.
But as it turns out,
1186
01:00:23,979 --> 01:00:26,380
Mr. X is coming home
for two days from Chicago,
1187
01:00:26,415 --> 01:00:29,316
so we're planning a small
family celebration.
1188
01:00:29,352 --> 01:00:32,013
Oh that's lovely.
Grayer couldn't ask for a better gift.
1189
01:00:32,053 --> 01:00:34,817
And then afterwards,
we'll all head over to the Carlyle
1190
01:00:34,856 --> 01:00:36,949
for a more formal affair with friends.
1191
01:00:36,992 --> 01:00:39,290
Obviously, I do expect you to attend.
1192
01:00:39,327 --> 01:00:40,851
Okay, all right.
1193
01:00:40,896 --> 01:00:42,488
So you will need to dress appropriately.
1194
01:00:42,530 --> 01:00:43,861
- Right.
- Anyway...
1195
01:00:43,899 --> 01:00:46,060
since you are not around to help,
1196
01:00:46,101 --> 01:00:47,863
- I've taken care of everything.
- Mommy, play!
1197
01:00:47,902 --> 01:00:49,699
Thank you.
1198
01:00:49,737 --> 01:00:53,173
Also, some roses arrived for you.
1199
01:00:53,207 --> 01:00:55,732
- Roses?
- Yes, very curious.
1200
01:00:55,776 --> 01:00:58,643
The card says, "Accept my apology,
1201
01:00:58,679 --> 01:01:00,704
or else."
1202
01:01:00,748 --> 01:01:02,510
Oh, that's crazy Grandpa.
1203
01:01:02,549 --> 01:01:04,608
He...
1204
01:01:04,651 --> 01:01:06,779
he didn't visit Grandma last night
1205
01:01:06,821 --> 01:01:08,345
and we just let him have it.
1206
01:01:08,389 --> 01:01:10,788
Well, you know how Grayer
is around pollen.
1207
01:01:10,824 --> 01:01:12,792
So, I'll have to throw them out.
1208
01:01:12,826 --> 01:01:14,124
- Annie?
- Oh, okay.
1209
01:01:14,161 --> 01:01:17,721
Well, you know, I am going to...
1210
01:01:17,764 --> 01:01:19,664
hang up because the pacemaker isn't on.
1211
01:01:19,699 --> 01:01:21,361
So I'll see you in the morning.
1212
01:01:21,402 --> 01:01:24,097
Oh gosh.
1213
01:01:24,137 --> 01:01:25,627
- Honey?
- Yeah?
1214
01:01:25,672 --> 01:01:27,640
- Are you okay?
- Mm-hm.
1215
01:01:27,674 --> 01:01:29,471
Perfect.
1216
01:01:29,508 --> 01:01:30,806
Dessert?
1217
01:01:45,123 --> 01:01:47,921
This is of vital importance,
are you aware of that?
1218
01:01:47,960 --> 01:01:49,428
I don't think right now is the time.
1219
01:01:49,462 --> 01:01:52,453
You have absolutely no idea
how disappointed I am.
1220
01:01:52,497 --> 01:01:54,589
Clowns are supposed to be funny.
1221
01:01:54,633 --> 01:01:58,467
Well, they're French clowns, Grove.
1222
01:01:58,502 --> 01:02:01,472
I hate them and I hate my birthday.
1223
01:02:01,505 --> 01:02:03,030
...in order to clean up your mess!
1224
01:02:03,075 --> 01:02:05,542
Do not interrupt me.
1225
01:02:05,576 --> 01:02:09,137
Now you told me
that the extra year of preschool
1226
01:02:09,180 --> 01:02:11,205
would guarantee him a spot.
1227
01:02:11,249 --> 01:02:13,911
Today he's six. What's your plan now?
1228
01:02:16,153 --> 01:02:18,485
I'll be back, okay?
1229
01:02:18,521 --> 01:02:20,080
We should try to be calm.
1230
01:02:20,124 --> 01:02:22,058
My brother's kids got in.
1231
01:02:22,093 --> 01:02:25,062
...that isn't enough of a humiliation.
I will not tolerate
1232
01:02:25,096 --> 01:02:27,326
- at this point...
- There are mimes in the next room.
1233
01:02:27,365 --> 01:02:29,333
- I suggest you keep your voice down.
- You know what?
1234
01:02:29,367 --> 01:02:31,062
Hey.
1235
01:02:33,870 --> 01:02:35,804
What the hell are you doing here?
1236
01:02:35,839 --> 01:02:38,000
I want to know why
you threw my flowers away.
1237
01:02:38,041 --> 01:02:39,633
I found them in the stairwell.
1238
01:02:39,676 --> 01:02:42,304
I didn't throw them away, okay?
My lunatic employer did.
1239
01:02:42,345 --> 01:02:45,075
And if you don't get out of here right
now, she's gonna throw me out too.
1240
01:02:45,115 --> 01:02:46,776
- Okay?
- Not until you agree to see me.
1241
01:02:46,816 --> 01:02:48,510
What? This has got to stop.
1242
01:02:48,550 --> 01:02:50,143
Come on, one date.
That's all I'm asking here.
1243
01:02:50,186 --> 01:02:53,952
Oh, fine fine, okay?
After work on Thursday. Go go.
1244
01:03:02,097 --> 01:03:05,260
Nanny.
1245
01:03:05,301 --> 01:03:07,292
Before we head over to the Carlyle,
1246
01:03:07,336 --> 01:03:10,271
I would like you to know
why Mr. X is so upset.
1247
01:03:11,674 --> 01:03:16,542
It seems that Grayer was
rejected for admission to Collegiate.
1248
01:03:16,577 --> 01:03:18,875
Um... I'm very sorry.
1249
01:03:18,914 --> 01:03:20,847
- That must be upsetting.
- Not upsetting.
1250
01:03:20,882 --> 01:03:22,873
Unacceptable.
1251
01:03:22,917 --> 01:03:24,908
Stop it!
1252
01:03:26,355 --> 01:03:28,117
- Get away from me!
- Oh, sweetheart.
1253
01:03:28,156 --> 01:03:30,556
Don't be afraid. They're only clowns.
1254
01:03:30,591 --> 01:03:32,388
- I hate them.
- They're nice French clowns.
1255
01:03:32,428 --> 01:03:35,328
They scare me!
1256
01:03:35,363 --> 01:03:37,957
Grayer, go to your mommy.
1257
01:03:37,999 --> 01:03:39,364
- Huh-uh.
- Go to your mommy, Grayer.
1258
01:03:39,400 --> 01:03:40,696
- Go.
- No.
1259
01:03:40,734 --> 01:03:42,702
Go on, sweetheart.
1260
01:03:42,736 --> 01:03:44,704
As I was saying, Nanny,
1261
01:03:44,738 --> 01:03:47,469
we feel that you are not
spending enough time
1262
01:03:47,507 --> 01:03:49,737
on educational activities with our son.
1263
01:03:49,776 --> 01:03:52,643
Therefore we have decided
to hire a consultant
1264
01:03:52,679 --> 01:03:54,772
to fully research the situation.
1265
01:03:54,815 --> 01:03:57,545
He will demand extra
time from you this week...
1266
01:03:57,584 --> 01:03:59,279
Whatever's best for Grayer.
1267
01:03:59,319 --> 01:04:02,618
...starting Thursday evening.
1268
01:04:02,656 --> 01:04:05,522
Do you read to the child
from "The Wall Street Journal"?
1269
01:04:05,591 --> 01:04:08,560
"Financial Times"? "Granta"?
1270
01:04:11,797 --> 01:04:14,232
I... I sing to him in French.
1271
01:04:14,267 --> 01:04:17,667
Well, we need more time than I thought
1272
01:04:17,703 --> 01:04:19,568
to get to the bottom of this.
1273
01:04:27,646 --> 01:04:30,012
I know. I know, I'm very very late.
1274
01:04:30,049 --> 01:04:31,812
I'm sorry. Did you get my message?
1275
01:04:31,851 --> 01:04:34,445
- Yep. All six of 'em.
- I couldn't get out of work.
1276
01:04:34,487 --> 01:04:36,955
The consultant kept me forever.
It was horrible.
1277
01:04:36,989 --> 01:04:38,819
Yeah, well, not only
did I lose the reservation,
1278
01:04:38,857 --> 01:04:40,984
but the kitchen is now closed. So...
1279
01:04:41,026 --> 01:04:44,394
Okay. I'm sorry I was late.
1280
01:04:44,430 --> 01:04:47,728
Um... sometimes these things just...
1281
01:04:47,766 --> 01:04:49,256
don't work out, okay?
1282
01:04:49,300 --> 01:04:52,565
Wait, whoa whoa whoa
whoa whoa whoa whoa.
1283
01:04:52,604 --> 01:04:54,868
Think you can just get
rid of me that easily?
1284
01:04:54,906 --> 01:04:56,737
No, it's not about getting rid of you.
1285
01:04:56,775 --> 01:05:00,233
It's just that no place around here
stays open this late. That's all.
1286
01:05:01,678 --> 01:05:04,545
Actually, I know the perfect place.
1287
01:05:08,986 --> 01:05:11,546
Pretty good, huh?
1288
01:05:11,588 --> 01:05:14,716
Number one slice on the Upper East Side.
1289
01:05:14,758 --> 01:05:17,352
It's not bad.
1290
01:05:17,394 --> 01:05:20,852
I'll tell you what though...
it doesn't touch the Jersey Shore.
1291
01:05:23,033 --> 01:05:25,126
Well, if you're such
a pizza connoisseur,
1292
01:05:25,169 --> 01:05:27,433
there's a really great
place in Italian Harlem.
1293
01:05:27,471 --> 01:05:28,767
I'll take you there sometime.
1294
01:05:28,805 --> 01:05:30,433
Harlem?
1295
01:05:30,474 --> 01:05:32,839
I have a hard time
imagining you in Harlem.
1296
01:05:32,875 --> 01:05:36,072
Why? I enjoy exploring my city.
1297
01:05:36,112 --> 01:05:37,909
Something you should
probably do more of.
1298
01:05:37,947 --> 01:05:39,812
Oh, thank you.
1299
01:05:39,849 --> 01:05:43,114
I'll try to squeeze that in between
cleaning up Grayer's vomit
1300
01:05:43,152 --> 01:05:44,881
and picking up Mrs. X's laundry.
1301
01:05:44,921 --> 01:05:47,616
Come on, if your job is that bad,
why don't you just quit?
1302
01:05:47,656 --> 01:05:49,955
I mean, it's not like you're on
a career path here.
1303
01:05:49,992 --> 01:05:51,220
I don't understand.
1304
01:05:51,260 --> 01:05:52,887
No, of course you don't understand.
1305
01:05:52,929 --> 01:05:55,556
You've obviously lived
a very charmed life
1306
01:05:55,597 --> 01:05:58,328
growing up on Fifth Avenue.
You went to Harvard.
1307
01:05:58,367 --> 01:06:00,301
A charmed life?
1308
01:06:02,438 --> 01:06:05,373
Okay. Now I get it.
1309
01:06:05,408 --> 01:06:08,843
You know, for your information
1310
01:06:08,877 --> 01:06:10,708
my mother died when I was four.
1311
01:06:10,745 --> 01:06:13,714
My father traveled constantly for work.
1312
01:06:13,748 --> 01:06:16,046
I was raised by nine different nannies
1313
01:06:16,084 --> 01:06:18,574
until I was old enough
to get shipped off to boarding school.
1314
01:06:18,619 --> 01:06:21,020
That's how charmed my life was.
1315
01:06:25,460 --> 01:06:27,723
- I'm really sorry.
- But you know something?
1316
01:06:27,761 --> 01:06:29,922
I still think I turned out
to be a pretty decent guy
1317
01:06:29,964 --> 01:06:31,295
in spite of it all.
1318
01:06:33,367 --> 01:06:35,892
I guess I'm officially an asshole.
1319
01:06:37,504 --> 01:06:39,631
Well...
1320
01:06:39,672 --> 01:06:41,868
asshole is a pretty strong word.
1321
01:06:41,909 --> 01:06:45,208
I would have gone with jerk or bonehead.
1322
01:06:45,246 --> 01:06:48,409
But that's just
my prep school upbringing.
1323
01:06:50,583 --> 01:06:53,417
I don't know, you know,
I just... I would love to quit.
1324
01:06:53,454 --> 01:06:56,786
I really would, but l...
1325
01:06:56,823 --> 01:06:59,257
I can't leave Grayer.
1326
01:06:59,292 --> 01:07:01,192
I can't.
1327
01:07:02,428 --> 01:07:03,952
You're gonna think I'm totally crazy,
1328
01:07:03,997 --> 01:07:07,160
but I feel really bad for her also.
1329
01:07:07,200 --> 01:07:09,464
Do you think I'm crazy?
1330
01:07:09,501 --> 01:07:12,300
Well, you know, you could
be suffering from
1331
01:07:12,338 --> 01:07:13,895
Stockholm Syndrome.
1332
01:07:13,939 --> 01:07:16,408
- You ever heard of Patty Hearst?
- Are you kidding?
1333
01:07:16,442 --> 01:07:18,102
Yes.
1334
01:07:18,143 --> 01:07:20,509
But I do think you should probably
let me kiss you right about now.
1335
01:07:20,546 --> 01:07:22,537
What?
1336
01:07:22,581 --> 01:07:24,947
Well...
1337
01:07:24,983 --> 01:07:26,712
we're two blocks from your building.
1338
01:07:26,752 --> 01:07:29,448
And once we get any closer,
I won't be able to go near you.
1339
01:07:29,488 --> 01:07:31,353
Which, to tell you the truth,
1340
01:07:31,390 --> 01:07:33,324
is all I've really thought
about since that day
1341
01:07:33,358 --> 01:07:35,349
I saw you in that Betsy Ross getup.
1342
01:07:35,394 --> 01:07:37,918
That is really kinky and weird.
1343
01:07:37,963 --> 01:07:40,556
You don't know the half of it.
1344
01:07:49,840 --> 01:07:52,070
Good night.
1345
01:07:52,109 --> 01:07:53,303
Good night.
1346
01:07:53,344 --> 01:07:55,835
- Pleasant evening.
- Yeah.
1347
01:08:07,791 --> 01:08:09,656
Good night.
1348
01:08:09,693 --> 01:08:11,355
Uh-huh.
1349
01:08:25,507 --> 01:08:27,373
Look out for the...
1350
01:08:27,410 --> 01:08:28,468
Sorry.
1351
01:08:43,993 --> 01:08:45,654
While doing field work,
1352
01:08:45,694 --> 01:08:48,526
anthropologists have been
known to lose themselves
1353
01:08:48,563 --> 01:08:50,554
in the very society
that they're studying,
1354
01:08:50,598 --> 01:08:54,057
a phenomenon known as "going native."
1355
01:08:54,103 --> 01:08:55,865
When this occurs,
1356
01:08:55,903 --> 01:08:59,431
the proper course of action
is to remove oneself
1357
01:08:59,475 --> 01:09:01,272
ASAP.
1358
01:09:03,978 --> 01:09:06,208
After my night with Harvard Hottie,
1359
01:09:06,247 --> 01:09:07,771
it became quite obvious
1360
01:09:07,815 --> 01:09:11,876
that my obsession with
the Xs meant I'd gone native.
1361
01:09:11,919 --> 01:09:13,978
Daydreaming in the park that day,
1362
01:09:14,022 --> 01:09:17,150
I came to the conclusion that
the only right thing to do
1363
01:09:17,191 --> 01:09:19,624
was confront Mrs. X...
1364
01:09:19,660 --> 01:09:21,322
and quit.
1365
01:09:23,563 --> 01:09:25,554
Oh, I forgot about this.
1366
01:09:25,599 --> 01:09:27,999
- Wow.
- This could work.
1367
01:09:31,772 --> 01:09:33,034
Mmm.
1368
01:09:33,073 --> 01:09:35,564
See if you can find me something short.
1369
01:09:35,609 --> 01:09:37,736
It'll go better with this neckline.
1370
01:09:37,778 --> 01:09:39,268
Okay.
1371
01:09:42,615 --> 01:09:44,674
Oh.
1372
01:09:44,717 --> 01:09:47,414
Did Grayer get you this?
1373
01:09:48,954 --> 01:09:51,855
God.
1374
01:09:51,891 --> 01:09:55,258
I bought this for
my mother when I was 10.
1375
01:09:55,295 --> 01:09:59,663
She got mad at me, refused to wear it.
She said it was common.
1376
01:09:59,699 --> 01:10:03,191
I think I saved it out of spite.
1377
01:10:17,383 --> 01:10:19,942
How about this?
1378
01:10:21,454 --> 01:10:25,014
Mr. X bought it for me for our first
wedding anniversary.
1379
01:10:25,056 --> 01:10:27,616
So it's only fitting
that I should wear it tonight,
1380
01:10:27,659 --> 01:10:28,785
right?
1381
01:10:28,827 --> 01:10:31,022
Definitely.
1382
01:10:41,473 --> 01:10:44,442
Mrs. X, I need to
talk to you about something.
1383
01:10:45,843 --> 01:10:47,743
I know you're really busy tonight,
1384
01:10:47,778 --> 01:10:49,871
so I was wondering if we
could schedule some time
1385
01:10:49,913 --> 01:10:52,643
- tomorrow night to talk.
- What is it, Nanny?
1386
01:10:54,885 --> 01:10:57,546
I... I think it's better
if we talk alone.
1387
01:10:57,587 --> 01:10:59,818
What is it?
1388
01:11:01,492 --> 01:11:03,755
Nanny, lend a hand.
1389
01:11:21,144 --> 01:11:23,634
Well?
1390
01:11:23,678 --> 01:11:25,669
You look amazing.
1391
01:11:27,350 --> 01:11:29,681
- Really?
- You look very pretty, Mommy.
1392
01:11:29,718 --> 01:11:32,279
And... and you like the Dior?
1393
01:11:32,321 --> 01:11:35,313
I mean, I know
it's a little much for dinner,
1394
01:11:35,358 --> 01:11:36,688
but afterwards he's taking me
1395
01:11:36,725 --> 01:11:39,285
to the President's
Circle Gala at the Met.
1396
01:11:39,328 --> 01:11:40,988
Well, I couldn't imagine
a more perfect dress
1397
01:11:41,029 --> 01:11:42,656
for a romantic anniversary.
1398
01:11:42,697 --> 01:11:45,097
All I need now is my husband.
1399
01:11:46,468 --> 01:11:49,130
I just called the airport.
1400
01:11:49,171 --> 01:11:52,368
There wasn't a single
delay or cancelation out of Chicago
1401
01:11:52,407 --> 01:11:54,500
so...
1402
01:11:54,542 --> 01:11:56,806
Where can that man be?
1403
01:11:58,447 --> 01:12:00,778
Nanny, call La Grande Nuit
1404
01:12:00,815 --> 01:12:02,408
- and tell them we're running late.
- Come on.
1405
01:12:02,451 --> 01:12:04,008
I don't want to lose the reservation.
1406
01:12:04,051 --> 01:12:06,645
Is it "Le Grande Nuit"
or "La Grande..."
1407
01:12:06,687 --> 01:12:08,780
"Le... Les"?
1408
01:12:08,823 --> 01:12:10,290
I think it's "La."
1409
01:12:12,159 --> 01:12:14,024
Thanks, smarty-pants.
1410
01:12:16,797 --> 01:12:19,322
- Hello?
- Uh yeah, it's me.
1411
01:12:19,366 --> 01:12:21,266
Listen, I'm losing cell service here.
1412
01:12:21,302 --> 01:12:23,497
I need you to find
my wife and explain to her
1413
01:12:23,536 --> 01:12:25,368
that my flight was canceled.
1414
01:12:25,406 --> 01:12:28,398
Uh, and since I'm gonna have to be back
here Sunday night,
1415
01:12:28,442 --> 01:12:30,307
I'm just gonna spend
the whole weekend in Chicago.
1416
01:12:30,344 --> 01:12:32,834
- No no no...
- Make sure to tell her I'm sorry.
1417
01:12:32,879 --> 01:12:34,847
No no no, Mr. X, you can't do this.
Look, she...
1418
01:12:40,720 --> 01:12:43,517
Nanny, who was it?
1419
01:12:50,330 --> 01:12:51,990
What did he say?
1420
01:12:53,565 --> 01:12:55,500
Um...
1421
01:12:57,169 --> 01:12:59,694
he said that...
1422
01:12:59,738 --> 01:13:01,262
his flight was canceled.
1423
01:13:03,275 --> 01:13:06,438
And...
1424
01:13:06,478 --> 01:13:09,674
and he's very very sorry.
1425
01:13:16,188 --> 01:13:18,621
Make sure you put that one on top.
1426
01:13:18,656 --> 01:13:19,782
I don't want anything to wrinkle.
1427
01:13:22,260 --> 01:13:23,625
Mommy, where are you going?
1428
01:13:26,498 --> 01:13:28,021
Mommy, don't go!
1429
01:13:28,065 --> 01:13:31,398
No, Gray... no, Grayer.
Don't... don't be difficult.
1430
01:13:31,435 --> 01:13:34,165
Mommy has to go away for
a few days to get some rest.
1431
01:13:34,205 --> 01:13:37,333
Nanny, I've decided to
take a few days off.
1432
01:13:37,375 --> 01:13:40,344
I'll be at the spa
at Canyon Ranch in Lenox.
1433
01:13:40,378 --> 01:13:43,540
- Maria has all my numbers.
- Oh God.
1434
01:13:45,349 --> 01:13:48,875
Nanny, can we go upstairs?
1435
01:13:48,919 --> 01:13:51,945
I feel funny.
1436
01:13:51,988 --> 01:13:55,548
Oh my God!
How did this come on so fast? 104?
1437
01:13:58,661 --> 01:14:00,686
Oh my God, oh my God. Okay okay.
1438
01:14:00,729 --> 01:14:02,663
Honey, come here. You okay?
1439
01:14:02,698 --> 01:14:04,030
I'm so sorry.
1440
01:14:04,067 --> 01:14:06,660
That's okay, that's okay. All right.
1441
01:14:08,338 --> 01:14:10,329
Okay, wait. No.
1442
01:14:10,373 --> 01:14:12,432
Hey, Lynette, it's Annie.
Listen, I need your help.
1443
01:14:12,475 --> 01:14:14,375
Grayer has a temperature of 104
1444
01:14:14,411 --> 01:14:16,742
and I have vomit all over me
and there's nobody here.
1445
01:14:16,779 --> 01:14:18,246
God. Did you call his mother?
1446
01:14:18,280 --> 01:14:20,543
Yes, I called his mother.
She's at some friggin' spa.
1447
01:14:20,583 --> 01:14:22,607
I left three messages
and she won't call me back.
1448
01:14:22,651 --> 01:14:24,515
I don't know what to do.
1449
01:14:24,552 --> 01:14:26,487
I mean, should I take him to
the emergency room or something?
1450
01:14:26,521 --> 01:14:28,580
- Annie, I can't answer that.
- I...
1451
01:14:28,623 --> 01:14:31,320
Do you know a number of a doctor
1452
01:14:31,360 --> 01:14:33,827
I could call for advice,
or a nurse even?
1453
01:14:33,861 --> 01:14:35,159
Of course I know a nurse.
1454
01:14:35,197 --> 01:14:37,096
Your mother.
1455
01:14:39,233 --> 01:14:40,996
Nanny?
1456
01:14:41,035 --> 01:14:43,128
Lynette, I have to call you back.
1457
01:14:43,171 --> 01:14:45,502
What is it, sweetheart? What's wrong?
1458
01:14:49,143 --> 01:14:52,112
I want my mommy.
1459
01:14:54,449 --> 01:14:56,383
Me too.
1460
01:15:00,087 --> 01:15:02,112
How is everything?
1461
01:15:02,155 --> 01:15:04,555
His fever's down.
1462
01:15:04,591 --> 01:15:06,855
But I think he's got the croup.
1463
01:15:06,893 --> 01:15:09,589
The steam should help open his passages
1464
01:15:09,630 --> 01:15:13,531
and hopefully it'll ease up his cough
and he can get some rest.
1465
01:15:13,566 --> 01:15:15,728
Is... is there anything I can do?
1466
01:15:15,769 --> 01:15:18,465
Just close the door.
1467
01:15:29,249 --> 01:15:30,715
He's okay now.
1468
01:15:30,750 --> 01:15:32,378
Much better.
1469
01:15:32,419 --> 01:15:33,885
Oh, thank you, God.
1470
01:15:33,919 --> 01:15:36,387
Even so, you should bring him
to the doctor in the morning.
1471
01:15:36,422 --> 01:15:38,652
He's probably gonna need a prescription.
1472
01:15:38,691 --> 01:15:39,953
Okay.
1473
01:15:39,992 --> 01:15:42,256
Hey, Ma, um...
1474
01:15:43,863 --> 01:15:46,331
l... I don't know how to...
1475
01:15:46,365 --> 01:15:48,798
thank you for
coming here, and helping...
1476
01:15:48,833 --> 01:15:50,733
Why'd you lie to me, Annie?
1477
01:15:54,440 --> 01:15:56,805
I have never lied to you.
1478
01:15:56,841 --> 01:15:58,366
Ever.
1479
01:15:58,411 --> 01:15:59,672
I know.
1480
01:15:59,711 --> 01:16:02,976
I just...
1481
01:16:04,916 --> 01:16:07,577
Oh, Mom, I couldn't handle it anymore.
1482
01:16:07,618 --> 01:16:09,052
- I just couldn't handle it.
- What?
1483
01:16:09,087 --> 01:16:11,611
What couldn't you handle?
You're young, you're smart,
1484
01:16:11,655 --> 01:16:15,319
you're energetic. You got this
incredibly bright future ahead of you.
1485
01:16:15,360 --> 01:16:16,792
It was too bright, Ma. All right?
1486
01:16:16,827 --> 01:16:19,228
I just... I just, I got...
I had to get away.
1487
01:16:19,264 --> 01:16:21,231
And do this?
1488
01:16:21,266 --> 01:16:23,665
You understand?
Every night shift I worked,
1489
01:16:23,701 --> 01:16:26,261
every overtime hour I accepted,
1490
01:16:26,303 --> 01:16:29,295
I did it because I wanted
something better for you than I had.
1491
01:16:30,307 --> 01:16:33,071
Nanny! Good, you're up.
1492
01:16:33,110 --> 01:16:34,599
Just leave that there.
1493
01:16:34,644 --> 01:16:37,910
So listen, the spa was just awful,
1494
01:16:37,948 --> 01:16:41,384
totally overrun with suburban riffraff.
1495
01:16:41,418 --> 01:16:43,409
And then in the middle of my body scrub,
1496
01:16:43,454 --> 01:16:46,047
Mr. X called and believe it or not,
1497
01:16:46,089 --> 01:16:48,853
he wants to take us
all to Nantucket next week.
1498
01:16:48,891 --> 01:16:51,951
So I figured I might as well
cut my trip short and...
1499
01:16:54,030 --> 01:16:56,225
Who's this?
1500
01:16:56,265 --> 01:16:57,960
I'm Judy.
1501
01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:00,491
It's my mom.
1502
01:17:01,636 --> 01:17:04,628
You never mentioned
you had a mother, Nanny.
1503
01:17:04,673 --> 01:17:07,438
Um...
1504
01:17:07,477 --> 01:17:10,138
my mom's a nurse.
She came over here to help me.
1505
01:17:10,179 --> 01:17:13,342
Grayer's been very very very sick.
1506
01:17:13,382 --> 01:17:15,679
- I tried calling you...
- Where is he?
1507
01:17:15,717 --> 01:17:19,153
Well he's... he's sleeping now.
1508
01:17:19,187 --> 01:17:21,246
Then he can't be that sick now, can he?
1509
01:17:21,289 --> 01:17:23,620
So listen, could you
quickly unpack my luggage
1510
01:17:23,657 --> 01:17:25,625
and just put everything in the laundry?
1511
01:17:25,659 --> 01:17:28,651
I'm exhausted and Mr. X is expected
sometime before 9:00.
1512
01:17:28,696 --> 01:17:31,097
I will see you in the morning.
1513
01:17:31,133 --> 01:17:34,330
Oh, very nice to meet you, Julie.
1514
01:17:34,369 --> 01:17:36,097
Judy.
1515
01:17:47,948 --> 01:17:51,816
Call me when this phase
of your life is over.
1516
01:17:55,489 --> 01:17:59,015
I desperately wanted
to yell out after her,
1517
01:17:59,059 --> 01:18:01,026
but it was like one of
those awful dreams
1518
01:18:01,060 --> 01:18:03,153
where I had no voice.
1519
01:18:03,196 --> 01:18:06,165
My desire to be an observer of life...
1520
01:18:06,199 --> 01:18:09,066
...was actually keeping me
from living one.
1521
01:18:09,102 --> 01:18:12,537
Clearly, the woman's heinous.
1522
01:18:12,572 --> 01:18:14,767
You gotta quit. It's just that simple.
1523
01:18:14,808 --> 01:18:17,674
I can't, all right? I tried.
1524
01:18:17,709 --> 01:18:21,043
What if I made you a tempting offer?
1525
01:18:21,080 --> 01:18:24,072
I'm gonna go to my father's house in
Southampton for a month.
1526
01:18:24,117 --> 01:18:28,576
I've got to take some time, figure out
if law school is really right for me.
1527
01:18:28,620 --> 01:18:29,985
Why don't you join me?
1528
01:18:30,022 --> 01:18:32,115
Do a little soul-searching.
1529
01:18:32,157 --> 01:18:34,490
We'd get the whole house to ourselves...
won't cost us a cent.
1530
01:18:34,526 --> 01:18:37,723
We'll walk on the beach.
We'll drink red wine,
1531
01:18:37,763 --> 01:18:40,197
grill fresh fish.
1532
01:18:40,232 --> 01:18:43,689
That sounds like heaven.
1533
01:18:43,734 --> 01:18:46,169
But what if this vacation
can save their marriage?
1534
01:18:46,205 --> 01:18:48,366
If I quit now, I'll ruin it
1535
01:18:48,407 --> 01:18:50,238
and break Grayer's heart.
1536
01:18:50,275 --> 01:18:53,607
What about my heart?
Do I count for anything?
1537
01:18:55,746 --> 01:18:58,647
Come on, say yes.
1538
01:18:58,683 --> 01:19:01,117
Be young with me in the Hamptons.
1539
01:19:01,152 --> 01:19:03,677
Don't go to Nantucket with the weirdoes.
1540
01:19:03,721 --> 01:19:05,848
What do you say?
1541
01:19:14,631 --> 01:19:17,600
Not a chance in hell, is there?
1542
01:19:17,634 --> 01:19:20,569
- I can take a hint.
- Come on, I didn't say no.
1543
01:19:20,604 --> 01:19:23,732
You weren't exactly screaming
yes though, were you?
1544
01:19:23,773 --> 01:19:25,798
I'm starting to wonder
if you're really selfless
1545
01:19:25,842 --> 01:19:28,503
or just a little self-obsessed.
1546
01:19:28,545 --> 01:19:30,445
Thank you. Thanks.
1547
01:19:30,480 --> 01:19:32,914
I have to go.
1548
01:19:35,385 --> 01:19:39,753
Listen, if you change
your mind, my offer stands.
1549
01:19:47,062 --> 01:19:49,463
We're going to 'Tucket.
We're going to 'Tucket.
1550
01:19:49,499 --> 01:19:52,763
Guess what else? I'm getting a puppy.
1551
01:19:52,801 --> 01:19:54,928
Oh!
1552
01:19:54,970 --> 01:19:57,131
Oh my God!
1553
01:19:59,441 --> 01:20:02,205
Daddy, Daddy, where's my puppy?
1554
01:20:02,244 --> 01:20:05,610
Been waiting for you right up
in the car there, sport.
1555
01:20:05,647 --> 01:20:07,411
- Isn't it wonderful?
- Mmm.
1556
01:20:07,449 --> 01:20:09,541
A family trip has been long overdue.
1557
01:20:09,584 --> 01:20:12,315
Mmm, listen, I didn't
want to say anything in front of Grayer,
1558
01:20:12,354 --> 01:20:14,322
but the truth is,
I can only stay for a few days.
1559
01:20:14,356 --> 01:20:17,051
They're really pushing me to
finish up in Chicago.
1560
01:20:17,091 --> 01:20:19,616
You can't be serious.
1561
01:20:19,661 --> 01:20:21,629
You're not gonna leave us
on this island alone.
1562
01:20:21,663 --> 01:20:23,722
Okay, we'll talk about it later.
1563
01:20:23,765 --> 01:20:26,427
* But I'm moving on *
1564
01:20:26,467 --> 01:20:31,404
* I'm gonna be your number one *
1565
01:20:31,439 --> 01:20:34,101
* I'm not the kind of girl *
1566
01:20:34,142 --> 01:20:38,544
* Who gives up just like that *
1567
01:20:38,578 --> 01:20:40,603
- * Oh no-o-o-o... *
- Hi.
1568
01:20:40,647 --> 01:20:43,639
It's Annie.
I haven't heard from you in a while.
1569
01:20:43,684 --> 01:20:46,175
You're probably in Southampton,
1570
01:20:46,219 --> 01:20:48,210
but I just wanted to
let you know that...
1571
01:20:48,255 --> 01:20:50,086
my cell phone doesn't work here.
1572
01:20:50,123 --> 01:20:52,887
So if you wanted to call...
1573
01:20:52,926 --> 01:20:55,292
if you wanted to call,
1574
01:20:55,329 --> 01:20:57,456
- you probably have the number...
- Nanny, hurry up!
1575
01:20:57,497 --> 01:20:59,465
...already on your cell phone,
but I will give it to you
1576
01:20:59,499 --> 01:21:02,332
just in case. It is 508...
1577
01:21:02,369 --> 01:21:04,598
- Hello?
- Oh.
1578
01:21:04,637 --> 01:21:06,764
- What, hello?
- Hello, Nanny?
1579
01:21:06,806 --> 01:21:08,501
- Wha...
- I need to use this phone.
1580
01:21:08,541 --> 01:21:10,941
- Immediately.
- Okay, so sorry.
1581
01:21:10,977 --> 01:21:14,605
- Oh God.
- Nanny, we're going to the beach.
1582
01:21:14,647 --> 01:21:17,013
When I grow up, I want enough money
1583
01:21:17,049 --> 01:21:19,449
to build a real castle.
1584
01:21:19,485 --> 01:21:22,647
Just remember, Grove,
that money can't buy love.
1585
01:21:22,687 --> 01:21:25,679
But Mommy pays you money and I love you.
1586
01:21:25,724 --> 01:21:28,387
Surprise surprise, dear.
1587
01:21:30,195 --> 01:21:34,063
- Mother?
- My, you've gotten portly.
1588
01:21:34,099 --> 01:21:36,590
Hi, Grandma.
1589
01:21:36,634 --> 01:21:38,761
What the hell are you doing here?
1590
01:21:38,803 --> 01:21:42,533
Ask your wife.
She's the one who requested I come.
1591
01:21:42,573 --> 01:21:46,203
- Darling, l...
- Not that I need an invitation.
1592
01:21:46,244 --> 01:21:48,371
It is my house.
1593
01:21:48,413 --> 01:21:50,880
I just wanted your mother
to be here for the news.
1594
01:21:50,914 --> 01:21:53,542
News, what news?
What in the hell is going on here?
1595
01:21:53,584 --> 01:21:57,020
I'm having another baby.
1596
01:21:59,457 --> 01:22:01,720
...virtually impossible.
1597
01:22:01,759 --> 01:22:03,488
What exactly do you want?
1598
01:22:03,526 --> 01:22:06,291
And now my mother is here
so I can't go to Chicago.
1599
01:22:06,330 --> 01:22:08,627
One lousy week!
1600
01:22:08,664 --> 01:22:11,599
You know something?
You are an infuriating woman.
1601
01:22:11,634 --> 01:22:13,102
You really are!
1602
01:22:13,137 --> 01:22:15,934
That's what you get for
rejecting debutante season.
1603
01:22:15,972 --> 01:22:17,963
Who asked you, bitch?
1604
01:22:28,284 --> 01:22:30,013
Can you look after
the kids for a minute?
1605
01:22:30,053 --> 01:22:33,079
I'm the only nanny here.
I just have to use the restroom.
1606
01:22:33,122 --> 01:22:34,885
Hmm.
1607
01:22:34,924 --> 01:22:38,087
Make it snappy, dear.
I'm on the last chapter.
1608
01:22:38,127 --> 01:22:40,186
Oh, thanks a million.
1609
01:22:53,742 --> 01:22:56,711
Oh. You look gorgeous.
1610
01:22:58,180 --> 01:23:00,978
Listen, I need some nanny advice.
1611
01:23:01,016 --> 01:23:02,710
- Okay.
- To tell you the truth,
1612
01:23:02,750 --> 01:23:05,913
I don't know what's gotten
into her lately.
1613
01:23:05,954 --> 01:23:08,922
Well, I installed a Nanny Cam.
1614
01:23:08,956 --> 01:23:11,015
So we'll soon see the truth.
1615
01:23:11,058 --> 01:23:13,891
It might be time to let her go.
1616
01:23:17,399 --> 01:23:19,889
I saw another one.
1617
01:23:19,934 --> 01:23:21,925
Make a wish, Grove.
1618
01:23:21,969 --> 01:23:25,905
I wish we could stay in 'Tucket forever,
1619
01:23:25,940 --> 01:23:29,307
Mommy, Daddy, you and my puppy.
1620
01:23:36,283 --> 01:23:38,274
Grove?
1621
01:23:43,022 --> 01:23:46,150
You know I...
1622
01:23:46,192 --> 01:23:49,423
I'm not gonna be your nanny forever.
1623
01:23:49,462 --> 01:23:52,555
I can't be.
1624
01:23:52,598 --> 01:23:56,035
That doesn't mean I'm not
gonna always be your friend.
1625
01:24:19,992 --> 01:24:22,892
What, there's no OJ
in the goddamned shit-shack?
1626
01:24:22,927 --> 01:24:25,828
Oh, I was just about to make some.
1627
01:24:25,863 --> 01:24:27,592
Mm-hm.
1628
01:24:36,774 --> 01:24:39,675
Where's Grayer? Isn't he up yet?
1629
01:24:39,710 --> 01:24:42,941
Um, he had a little trouble sleeping.
1630
01:24:42,980 --> 01:24:44,811
So...
1631
01:24:48,785 --> 01:24:52,153
Concentrate? You have
got to be kidding me.
1632
01:24:52,190 --> 01:24:55,387
All my money and I can't
get fresh-squeezed? Come on.
1633
01:24:57,194 --> 01:25:00,494
Uh, we used it all at the party, so...
1634
01:25:00,530 --> 01:25:02,259
Hmm.
1635
01:25:02,299 --> 01:25:05,791
Well then, why don't you and I
take a little trip to the market
1636
01:25:05,835 --> 01:25:07,631
and get us some, huh?
1637
01:25:30,659 --> 01:25:33,719
I'm not in right now.
Leave it at the beep.
1638
01:25:33,762 --> 01:25:37,323
* Be the new one, burn to shine *
1639
01:25:37,366 --> 01:25:41,768
* I take the blue ones every time *
1640
01:25:41,803 --> 01:25:45,933
* Walk me down your broken line *
1641
01:25:45,974 --> 01:25:48,602
* All you have to do is cry *
1642
01:25:48,643 --> 01:25:51,669
* Yes, all you have to do is cry *
1643
01:25:53,248 --> 01:25:56,115
* All you have to do is cry. *
1644
01:26:08,895 --> 01:26:11,194
- Where's Grayer?
- With his grandmother.
1645
01:26:13,066 --> 01:26:15,660
And where, may I ask, have you been?
1646
01:26:19,106 --> 01:26:21,040
Um...
1647
01:26:21,074 --> 01:26:23,598
- I just had to clear my head.
- Did you?
1648
01:26:23,644 --> 01:26:26,772
I imagine your unacceptable behavior
1649
01:26:26,813 --> 01:26:30,374
has something to do
with that boy in the building.
1650
01:26:30,417 --> 01:26:33,215
Nanny.
1651
01:26:33,253 --> 01:26:36,245
I wasn't born yesterday.
1652
01:26:36,290 --> 01:26:38,621
He called several times this week.
1653
01:26:38,658 --> 01:26:41,149
He called? Why didn't you tell me?
1654
01:26:41,193 --> 01:26:43,161
I suppose I forgot.
1655
01:26:46,232 --> 01:26:48,757
It's really for your own good.
1656
01:26:48,801 --> 01:26:51,395
He's a little out of
your league, don't you think?
1657
01:26:51,437 --> 01:26:54,031
It couldn't possibly end well.
1658
01:26:55,540 --> 01:26:58,509
Clearly this isn't working out.
1659
01:26:58,543 --> 01:27:00,875
Mr. X has arranged for
a taxi to take you to the ferry
1660
01:27:00,912 --> 01:27:02,846
and then for a car to
pick you up on the other end.
1661
01:27:02,881 --> 01:27:04,906
Please don't... please don't do this.
1662
01:27:04,949 --> 01:27:07,975
Not... not for me, but for Grayer.
1663
01:27:08,019 --> 01:27:11,318
Not until you and your husband work
your problems out.
1664
01:27:11,356 --> 01:27:13,688
Don't you dare.
1665
01:27:13,725 --> 01:27:16,489
You stupid... you stupid girl.
1666
01:27:16,527 --> 01:27:19,497
As if you know anything about my life.
1667
01:27:19,530 --> 01:27:22,261
As if you know anything
about the real world.
1668
01:27:43,987 --> 01:27:45,318
All I got's $100.
1669
01:27:45,356 --> 01:27:47,846
All right, you know what?
Just give me the change
1670
01:27:47,891 --> 01:27:50,086
when you come back for my mother
at some point, okay?
1671
01:27:50,127 --> 01:27:51,821
Keep 10 bucks for yourself, all right?
1672
01:27:51,861 --> 01:27:54,523
Nanny...
1673
01:27:54,564 --> 01:27:56,759
here's your final payment.
1674
01:27:56,799 --> 01:27:58,630
I expect you to have all your things
1675
01:27:58,668 --> 01:28:00,636
out of our apartment by
the time we come back.
1676
01:28:00,670 --> 01:28:03,161
Just leave the keys with the doorman.
1677
01:28:10,813 --> 01:28:13,576
Grayer, I think you should take a nap.
1678
01:28:13,615 --> 01:28:16,141
I'm certainly ready for one.
1679
01:28:16,185 --> 01:28:19,279
Nanny! Where are you going?
1680
01:28:20,956 --> 01:28:23,652
- Nanny!
- Grayer. Grayer.
1681
01:28:23,692 --> 01:28:25,091
- Nanny!
- Stay here.
1682
01:28:25,127 --> 01:28:27,027
- Here.
- What are you doing?
1683
01:28:27,062 --> 01:28:28,654
- Take it, take it.
- What?
1684
01:28:28,697 --> 01:28:31,495
I can't tolerate the yapping.
Grayer's too young anyway.
1685
01:28:32,701 --> 01:28:34,430
- Nanny!
- Grayer.
1686
01:28:34,469 --> 01:28:36,561
- Nanny, don't go!
- Grayer, sweetheart...
1687
01:28:36,604 --> 01:28:40,041
Nanny, wait!
1688
01:28:40,075 --> 01:28:42,508
- Nanny!
- Grayer!
1689
01:28:42,543 --> 01:28:44,670
Nanny, don't leave me.
1690
01:28:47,114 --> 01:28:49,310
Nanny!
1691
01:28:56,023 --> 01:28:58,253
Grayer.
1692
01:29:46,138 --> 01:29:47,628
What?
1693
01:30:06,492 --> 01:30:08,322
Go ahead, puppy, do your business.
1694
01:30:08,360 --> 01:30:10,190
Anywhere you like.
1695
01:30:16,234 --> 01:30:17,895
Good puppy!
1696
01:30:20,104 --> 01:30:23,800
Nanny Cam, Nanny Cam,
where are you hiding?
1697
01:30:30,680 --> 01:30:32,841
I love you.
1698
01:30:35,685 --> 01:30:37,983
Hola.
1699
01:30:39,222 --> 01:30:40,883
Hmm.
1700
01:30:41,892 --> 01:30:43,826
Aha!
1701
01:30:43,860 --> 01:30:46,521
Okay, lady, you want Nanny Cam?
1702
01:30:46,562 --> 01:30:48,655
I'll give you "Nannies Gone Wild."
1703
01:30:52,202 --> 01:30:55,034
And this is how the most
significant confrontation
1704
01:30:55,070 --> 01:30:57,437
in my life...
1705
01:30:57,474 --> 01:31:00,101
happened with a teddy bear.
1706
01:31:07,783 --> 01:31:11,981
After the abrupt termination
of my field work,
1707
01:31:12,021 --> 01:31:14,455
I took some time to make sense
1708
01:31:14,490 --> 01:31:17,686
of all that I had witnessed.
1709
01:31:17,725 --> 01:31:19,421
During this period
1710
01:31:19,461 --> 01:31:22,122
I read that critics of
anthropology believe
1711
01:31:22,163 --> 01:31:24,394
that just by observing a culture
1712
01:31:24,433 --> 01:31:26,559
you inevitably change it.
1713
01:31:26,601 --> 01:31:28,728
- Mm!
- Ow! Hey.
1714
01:31:28,770 --> 01:31:31,568
In the many times that
I thought of Grayer,
1715
01:31:31,606 --> 01:31:34,803
I secretly hoped those critics...
1716
01:31:34,842 --> 01:31:37,003
were right.
1717
01:31:38,612 --> 01:31:42,049
This is a tape of
my latest nanny disaster.
1718
01:31:42,116 --> 01:31:45,778
She was extremely problematic,
to say the least.
1719
01:31:45,819 --> 01:31:47,616
She neglected Grayer.
1720
01:31:47,654 --> 01:31:50,817
She drank.
She even flirted with my husband.
1721
01:31:50,857 --> 01:31:52,290
I finally had to fire her
1722
01:31:52,326 --> 01:31:55,022
for promiscuous behavior
with a boy in the building.
1723
01:31:55,062 --> 01:31:58,031
This videotape shows her
feeding my child
1724
01:31:58,065 --> 01:32:01,796
peanut butter and jelly
directly from the jar.
1725
01:32:01,835 --> 01:32:03,631
You know, I remember this nanny.
1726
01:32:03,669 --> 01:32:06,366
She had a very peculiar attitude.
1727
01:32:06,406 --> 01:32:08,374
Let's watch.
1728
01:32:08,408 --> 01:32:10,705
You excited about
going to Nantucket?
1729
01:32:10,743 --> 01:32:11,903
Yes.
1730
01:32:11,944 --> 01:32:13,435
Okay, well, why don't you
close your eyes
1731
01:32:13,480 --> 01:32:15,811
and you can dream about
building sand castles?
1732
01:32:15,848 --> 01:32:17,543
- I love you, Nanny.
- Good night.
1733
01:32:17,583 --> 01:32:20,051
This must be the wrong tape.
I've never seen this one before.
1734
01:32:20,086 --> 01:32:22,680
It's all right, just let it play out.
We'll get to something good.
1735
01:32:26,658 --> 01:32:28,854
Oh! It's a problem.
1736
01:32:28,894 --> 01:32:31,055
Big problem.
1737
01:32:31,097 --> 01:32:34,725
Okay, Mrs. X, now it's time for a few
simple child-care rules.
1738
01:32:34,766 --> 01:32:37,463
Oh, all right. The teddy bear has
been compromised.
1739
01:32:37,502 --> 01:32:41,063
Slamming the door in
your kid's face is not okay.
1740
01:32:41,106 --> 01:32:44,371
Spending more time on a benefit for
kids you've never met
1741
01:32:44,410 --> 01:32:46,877
than you do with
your own blood is not okay.
1742
01:32:46,911 --> 01:32:50,745
Going to a spa when
your son has a fever of 104
1743
01:32:50,782 --> 01:32:52,807
and not answering emergency calls,
1744
01:32:52,851 --> 01:32:54,647
that officially makes you
an unfit mother.
1745
01:32:54,685 --> 01:32:56,085
This is outrageous. Stop the tape.
1746
01:32:56,121 --> 01:32:59,988
Uh, no, this is clearly
a disgruntled nanny.
1747
01:33:00,025 --> 01:33:02,822
We... we might have
something to learn here.
1748
01:33:02,860 --> 01:33:06,660
Yeah, I know that you're really busy
with your hair appointments
1749
01:33:06,697 --> 01:33:08,325
and your Watsu massages
1750
01:33:08,366 --> 01:33:11,357
and your attempts to stay young
so your husband won't leave you,
1751
01:33:11,402 --> 01:33:15,236
but here's an idea... why don't you try
eating dinner with your child
1752
01:33:15,272 --> 01:33:16,864
every once in a blue moon?
1753
01:33:16,907 --> 01:33:18,340
And a head's up here, lady.
1754
01:33:18,375 --> 01:33:21,208
Try smiling once in a while.
People hate you!
1755
01:33:22,946 --> 01:33:24,742
As for you, Mr. X,
1756
01:33:24,781 --> 01:33:26,942
who the hell are you?
1757
01:33:26,983 --> 01:33:29,179
Maybe you're asking the same about me.
1758
01:33:29,219 --> 01:33:31,049
I know you've noticed my ass,
1759
01:33:31,087 --> 01:33:32,952
but you probably don't
recognize my face,
1760
01:33:32,989 --> 01:33:34,752
so here's a little hint, okay?
1761
01:33:34,791 --> 01:33:37,783
I'm the one who's been raising your son.
1762
01:33:42,531 --> 01:33:44,830
Grayer is not an accessory.
1763
01:33:44,867 --> 01:33:48,529
His mother didn't
order him from a catalogue.
1764
01:33:48,570 --> 01:33:50,800
Your son, your wife,
1765
01:33:50,839 --> 01:33:53,672
are... are...
1766
01:33:53,709 --> 01:33:55,973
are people in your home,
1767
01:33:56,011 --> 01:33:59,947
human beings who are
drowning in their desire
1768
01:33:59,981 --> 01:34:03,075
for you to just...
for you to look at them.
1769
01:34:16,931 --> 01:34:20,833
You know, the truth is,
I don't wish either of you harm.
1770
01:34:22,703 --> 01:34:25,536
If for no other reason than you having
1771
01:34:25,573 --> 01:34:28,940
the profound privilege
of being Grayer's parents.
1772
01:34:31,946 --> 01:34:34,607
Grayer loves you.
1773
01:34:36,649 --> 01:34:38,549
He...
1774
01:34:38,585 --> 01:34:42,283
he doesn't care what you're
wearing or what you buy him
1775
01:34:42,323 --> 01:34:44,052
or what school he gets into.
1776
01:34:44,091 --> 01:34:47,958
He just... he just wants you there.
1777
01:34:47,994 --> 01:34:50,327
That's it.
1778
01:34:51,931 --> 01:34:54,593
And time's running out,
1779
01:34:54,634 --> 01:34:57,102
and he won't love you
unconditionally that much longer.
1780
01:34:57,137 --> 01:35:00,265
So...
1781
01:35:00,306 --> 01:35:03,002
for your own good,
1782
01:35:03,042 --> 01:35:05,442
don't miss out on getting to know him.
1783
01:35:05,478 --> 01:35:09,175
He is... he's truly
1784
01:35:09,215 --> 01:35:13,674
an amazing amazing little person.
1785
01:35:36,074 --> 01:35:37,665
Excuse me.
1786
01:35:37,708 --> 01:35:40,199
Of course.
1787
01:35:55,459 --> 01:35:57,517
Buenas noches.
1788
01:36:02,966 --> 01:36:06,561
It's a much tougher game
out there for women.
1789
01:36:08,271 --> 01:36:11,570
Nature deals us some tricky cards.
1790
01:36:11,608 --> 01:36:13,599
Is that so hard for you to understand?
1791
01:36:13,643 --> 01:36:15,406
No.
1792
01:36:15,445 --> 01:36:18,209
I don't know, Mom. I just...
1793
01:36:20,817 --> 01:36:23,308
So I guess you're not
going into finance?
1794
01:36:23,353 --> 01:36:26,083
I don't think that having money
makes it any easier.
1795
01:36:26,122 --> 01:36:28,715
You know, I know that now.
1796
01:36:31,894 --> 01:36:34,329
It's okay.
1797
01:36:34,364 --> 01:36:36,194
It's your life.
1798
01:36:36,232 --> 01:36:38,257
Personally, I think
you're making a big mistake.
1799
01:36:42,805 --> 01:36:45,865
But it is your life.
1800
01:36:45,908 --> 01:36:48,433
I want you to be happy.
1801
01:36:53,681 --> 01:36:55,546
Hey.
1802
01:36:55,583 --> 01:36:57,449
- Hayden.
- Oh, that's right.
1803
01:36:57,486 --> 01:36:59,646
I forgot to mention his name is Hayden.
1804
01:36:59,687 --> 01:37:01,712
And once I finally let myself say it,
1805
01:37:01,756 --> 01:37:03,724
it was a habit that
was pretty hard to break.
1806
01:37:03,758 --> 01:37:05,658
It is... it's going
pretty good actually.
1807
01:37:05,693 --> 01:37:08,025
There's more scholarships
out there than I thought.
1808
01:37:08,062 --> 01:37:10,292
So why are you so late?
1809
01:37:10,331 --> 01:37:13,459
Because I have something for you.
1810
01:37:13,500 --> 01:37:15,764
It's from your former employer.
1811
01:37:15,802 --> 01:37:16,860
What?
1812
01:37:16,904 --> 01:37:18,963
She cornered me on the 12th floor,
1813
01:37:19,006 --> 01:37:22,806
figured I could get
to you before she could.
1814
01:37:25,646 --> 01:37:28,308
I don't want to read this.
1815
01:37:28,348 --> 01:37:30,942
- Why don't I read it to you?
- Okay.
1816
01:37:36,622 --> 01:37:38,090
"Dear Annie...
1817
01:37:40,427 --> 01:37:43,487
It's been several months
since we've spoken.
1818
01:37:43,529 --> 01:37:46,965
Even so, the things you said
on that tape haunt me every day.
1819
01:37:46,999 --> 01:37:50,730
And now looking back,
I don't know what to say
1820
01:37:50,770 --> 01:37:52,829
except thank you...
1821
01:37:52,872 --> 01:37:55,602
- and I'm sorry."
- "And I'm sorry.
1822
01:37:55,641 --> 01:37:57,768
You were so right.
1823
01:37:57,810 --> 01:38:01,769
Of all my privileges,
Grayer is my greatest.
1824
01:38:01,814 --> 01:38:05,272
I desperately needed
someone to show me that.
1825
01:38:05,318 --> 01:38:06,979
You did.
1826
01:38:07,019 --> 01:38:10,284
And for that, I owe you the world.
1827
01:38:11,690 --> 01:38:13,658
You may or may not be surprised
1828
01:38:13,692 --> 01:38:15,717
to learn that I've left my husband.
1829
01:38:15,760 --> 01:38:17,785
Not out of the jar.
1830
01:38:17,829 --> 01:38:19,524
Try it.
1831
01:38:20,966 --> 01:38:22,957
Any man who made me
feel desperate enough
1832
01:38:23,001 --> 01:38:25,663
to feign a pregnancy
wasn't worth fighting for.
1833
01:38:25,704 --> 01:38:27,467
Isn't it good?
1834
01:38:29,573 --> 01:38:32,008
Yeah.
1835
01:38:32,043 --> 01:38:33,442
Yeah, it is good.
1836
01:38:33,478 --> 01:38:35,877
So I'm pretty confident that in time
1837
01:38:35,913 --> 01:38:37,710
we'll be getting along just fine.
1838
01:38:37,748 --> 01:38:39,579
Yeah, it's really good.
1839
01:38:39,616 --> 01:38:42,244
It's really good.
1840
01:38:42,287 --> 01:38:45,813
Please know that I wish
you all the best in life.
1841
01:38:45,856 --> 01:38:47,983
- Sincerely..."
- "Sincerely...
1842
01:38:48,025 --> 01:38:50,289
Alexandra.
1843
01:38:50,327 --> 01:38:52,352
P.S...
1844
01:38:55,132 --> 01:38:58,465
I'm happy to report that Grayer asks
for you a little bit less
1845
01:38:58,501 --> 01:39:01,766
every day and every night."
1846
01:39:11,214 --> 01:39:12,977
- Come on.
- Okay.
1847
01:39:13,016 --> 01:39:14,244
Let's get out of here.
1848
01:39:14,283 --> 01:39:16,080
Catching the Yankees game
with my dad tonight.
1849
01:39:16,119 --> 01:39:18,383
- Sounds wonderful.
- Yeah.
1850
01:39:18,421 --> 01:39:22,357
There's a popular belief
amongst anthropologists
1851
01:39:22,392 --> 01:39:26,351
that you must immerse
yourself in an unfamiliar world
1852
01:39:26,396 --> 01:39:30,389
in order to truly understand your own.
1853
01:39:31,600 --> 01:39:34,125
I've probably gotta
get going soon actually.
1854
01:39:37,005 --> 01:39:38,563
See you later tonight, okay?
1855
01:39:38,607 --> 01:39:40,370
Yeah.
1856
01:39:40,409 --> 01:39:42,569
I certainly hope so.
1857
01:39:47,349 --> 01:39:49,442
In conclusion,
1858
01:39:49,484 --> 01:39:51,713
I hope this field diary
has been illuminating
1859
01:39:51,752 --> 01:39:55,120
for those considering my application
to graduate school.
1860
01:39:56,657 --> 01:39:58,557
It certainly has been for me.
1861
01:39:58,592 --> 01:40:00,753
* Oh yeah *
1862
01:40:03,664 --> 01:40:06,565
After a lost summer of being Nanny,
1863
01:40:06,600 --> 01:40:09,262
I finally got to know Annie.
1864
01:40:13,606 --> 01:40:15,904
Thanks to a little man named Grayer,
1865
01:40:15,943 --> 01:40:18,843
I only had to trek
across the Hudson River
1866
01:40:18,878 --> 01:40:21,847
to make this most amazing discovery.
1867
01:40:21,881 --> 01:40:23,712
- * I won't let you down *
- * Freedom *
1868
01:40:23,750 --> 01:40:26,218
- * I will not give you up *
- * Freedom *
1869
01:40:26,252 --> 01:40:27,651
* Have some faith in the sound *
1870
01:40:27,687 --> 01:40:29,621
* You got to give what you take *
1871
01:40:29,656 --> 01:40:31,146
* Freedom *
1872
01:40:31,191 --> 01:40:33,182
* I won't let you down *
1873
01:40:33,226 --> 01:40:36,093
- * Freedom *
- * So please don't give me up. *
1874
01:40:40,934 --> 01:40:42,958
* Wake up one morning *
1875
01:40:43,036 --> 01:40:46,061
* You realize *
1876
01:40:46,106 --> 01:40:49,131
* Your life is one big compromise *
1877
01:40:49,174 --> 01:40:50,835
* Compromise *
1878
01:40:50,876 --> 01:40:55,575
* Stuck in the job you swore
was only temporary *
1879
01:40:55,614 --> 01:40:57,445
* Was only temporary *
1880
01:40:57,483 --> 01:41:00,452
* Yeah *
1881
01:41:00,486 --> 01:41:03,613
* Feel like the world
is passing you by *
1882
01:41:03,654 --> 01:41:05,384
* Doo-doo-doo doo-doo *
1883
01:41:05,424 --> 01:41:08,359
* Never done all the things
you wanted to try *
1884
01:41:08,393 --> 01:41:10,553
* Stuck in one place *
1885
01:41:10,595 --> 01:41:12,722
* Got a pain in your face *
1886
01:41:12,763 --> 01:41:15,358
* From all your stressin' out,
all your stressin' out *
1887
01:41:15,400 --> 01:41:17,196
* All your stressin' out *
1888
01:41:17,235 --> 01:41:20,136
* Hey, you ask yourself *
1889
01:41:20,171 --> 01:41:22,605
* There's got to be more *
1890
01:41:22,640 --> 01:41:24,801
* Than what I'm living for *
1891
01:41:24,842 --> 01:41:26,776
* What I'm living for *
1892
01:41:26,811 --> 01:41:28,335
* What I'm living for *
1893
01:41:28,379 --> 01:41:30,676
* You ask yourself there's got to be *
1894
01:41:30,714 --> 01:41:33,343
* Something else *
1895
01:41:33,384 --> 01:41:36,148
* Something more, more *
1896
01:41:36,187 --> 01:41:39,713
* More, well, let the sun shine *
1897
01:41:39,756 --> 01:41:41,849
* On your face *
1898
01:41:41,892 --> 01:41:44,224
* And don't let your life *
1899
01:41:44,261 --> 01:41:47,025
* Go to waste *
1900
01:41:47,063 --> 01:41:48,530
* Now is the time *
1901
01:41:48,565 --> 01:41:51,796
* Got to make up your mind *
1902
01:41:51,835 --> 01:41:54,701
* Let it shine on you *
1903
01:41:54,737 --> 01:41:57,831
* Let it shine on you *
1904
01:41:57,874 --> 01:42:01,173
* Feel like there's nothing,
nowhere to go *
1905
01:42:01,211 --> 01:42:03,007
* Doo-doo-doo doo-doo *
1906
01:42:03,045 --> 01:42:05,946
* You try and fight
but you can't let go *
1907
01:42:05,981 --> 01:42:10,476
* Of all the pain, got so much to gain *
1908
01:42:10,519 --> 01:42:13,044
* Now is the time *
1909
01:42:13,088 --> 01:42:15,648
* Mm-hmm *
1910
01:42:15,691 --> 01:42:17,818
* You ask yourself *
1911
01:42:17,860 --> 01:42:21,387
* There's got to be something else *
1912
01:42:21,430 --> 01:42:25,298
* Something more, more, more *
1913
01:42:25,334 --> 01:42:27,767
* Let the sun shine *
1914
01:42:27,802 --> 01:42:29,929
* On your face *
1915
01:42:29,971 --> 01:42:32,440
* And don't let your life *
1916
01:42:32,474 --> 01:42:34,873
* Go to waste *
1917
01:42:34,909 --> 01:42:39,676
* Now is the time,
got to make up your mind *
1918
01:42:39,714 --> 01:42:42,580
* Let it shine on you *
1919
01:42:42,617 --> 01:42:44,414
* Let it shine on you *
1920
01:42:44,452 --> 01:42:47,784
* You ask yourself, there's got to be *
1921
01:42:47,822 --> 01:42:51,882
* More than what I'm living for *
1922
01:42:51,925 --> 01:42:54,655
* What I'm living for,
what I'm living for *
1923
01:42:54,695 --> 01:42:57,494
* You ask yourself, there's got to be *
1924
01:42:57,531 --> 01:43:01,262
* Something else, something more *
1925
01:43:01,301 --> 01:43:03,826
* More, more *
1926
01:43:03,870 --> 01:43:05,929
* Well, let the sun shine *
1927
01:43:05,973 --> 01:43:08,339
* On your face *
1928
01:43:08,375 --> 01:43:10,809
* And don't let your life *
1929
01:43:10,844 --> 01:43:13,573
* Go to waste *
1930
01:43:13,613 --> 01:43:15,309
* Now is the time *
1931
01:43:15,349 --> 01:43:18,681
* Got to make up your mind *
1932
01:43:18,718 --> 01:43:20,879
* Let it shine on you *
1933
01:43:20,920 --> 01:43:22,979
* Let it shine on you *
1934
01:43:23,022 --> 01:43:25,115
* Let the sun shine *
1935
01:43:25,157 --> 01:43:27,318
* On your face *
1936
01:43:27,361 --> 01:43:29,590
* And don't let your life *
1937
01:43:29,629 --> 01:43:32,189
* Go to waste *
1938
01:43:32,231 --> 01:43:34,290
* Now is the time *
1939
01:43:34,333 --> 01:43:37,359
* Got to make up your mind *
1940
01:43:37,403 --> 01:43:39,734
* Let it shine on you *
1941
01:43:39,771 --> 01:43:42,297
* Let it shine on you *
1942
01:43:42,341 --> 01:43:44,468
* Let the sun shine *
1943
01:43:44,509 --> 01:43:46,807
* On your face *
1944
01:43:46,845 --> 01:43:49,280
* And don't let your life *
1945
01:43:49,315 --> 01:43:51,544
* Go to waste *
1946
01:43:51,583 --> 01:43:53,517
* Now is the time *
1947
01:43:53,551 --> 01:43:56,952
* Got to make up your mind *
1948
01:43:56,988 --> 01:43:59,149
* Let it shine on you *
1949
01:43:59,190 --> 01:44:01,589
* Let it shine on you. *
1950
01:44:02,190 --> 01:44:11,589
THE END retail subtitles
142383
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.