Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,400
This programme contains
some strong language from the start,
2
00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:08,320
scenes which some viewers
may find upsetting
3
00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:10,680
and discriminatory language.
4
00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:12,480
HE SNORES
5
00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:27,520
PHONE BUZZES
6
00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:32,840
Fuck.
7
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:35,960
Shit!
8
00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:41,920
Hello? Hi, Adam.
9
00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:44,680
It's Shruti, one of the SHOs.
Sorry to disturb you.
10
00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:47,480
Erm, you're on the rota
for labour ward today,
11
00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,080
and Mr Lockhart...
Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12
00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:52,800
Erm, tell him I'm really sorry.
13
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:55,520
I think there's been an accident.
I've been sat here for an hour...
14
00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:57,800
HE GROANS
15
00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:00,920
And I'll be there in a minute.
16
00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:04,600
Well, I'm not dead, am I?
17
00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:07,120
Please tell me
you haven't ordered a coffin.
18
00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:10,280
Of course I'm not having
an affair. I wouldn't have the time.
19
00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,800
I just fell asleep last night
when I went to the car.
20
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,640
Who did you phone? Please tell me
you haven't phoned the police.
21
00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:18,440
Well, who did you phone, then?
22
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,000
Oh, sorry.
23
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,240
Who did you phone, then?
24
00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,080
My mum?!
25
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,960
Shit. Are you deranged?
26
00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:29,960
And what did she...?
27
00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:32,160
SHE CRIES OUT
28
00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:34,840
Don't go anywhere. I'm going
to call you right back.
29
00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:37,000
Is coming out!
30
00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,520
Is coming out!
31
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:40,960
Well, a stroke of luck,
you've come to the right place.
32
00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:42,640
Let's get you up to
labour ward, shall we?
33
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,440
It's, erm, a bit of a walk,
I'm afraid.
34
00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:45,840
SHE CRIES OUT
35
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,120
Do you mind if I have
a quick check?
36
00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:49,920
I'm a doctor.
Probably should have said.
37
00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:51,360
I'm Adam. And you are...?
38
00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:53,200
Andrea. Andrea.
39
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,840
SHE GASPS
40
00:01:56,240 --> 00:02:01,800
OK. OK, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm
41
00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,320
has come out. That is normal?
42
00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:08,280
Take a wild guess.
Baby is lying sideways.
43
00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:10,880
Do you understand that? Sideways?
44
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:13,560
So you need a Caesarean section.
Oh, Caesarean.
45
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,160
I've got a scalpel in my
back pocket. You'll be fine.
46
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:17,520
Shall we go?
47
00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:19,760
Yeah. Yeah? That's it.
48
00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:23,520
That's it. You OK?
49
00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,960
Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut.
Let's go this way.
50
00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,680
I don't want to hurry you, Andrea,
51
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,160
but we've got to get going.
You're doing brilliantly.
52
00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,400
It's OK. Deep breaths.
PORTER: Mind yourselves!
53
00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:35,480
Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up.
54
00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,160
SHE CRIES OUT
That's it, we're nearly there.
55
00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,120
We're going to go up in
the staff lift.
56
00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:41,360
Nearly there, nearly there.
57
00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:46,200
Come on. This is lift?
It's safe. Come on.
58
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:49,080
Really? Yeah. You can do it.
I can't!
59
00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:50,680
No, wait. Wait, wait.
60
00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:53,200
Wait for it. No, no, no.
OK, are you ready?
61
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,000
Three, two, one. SHE CRIES OUT
62
00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,520
Keep breathing.
Nice deep breaths.
63
00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:00,760
When I say so, we're going to
jump out of the lift.
64
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,160
Are you a real doctor?
65
00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:03,800
Fair question...
66
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:05,960
..though, strangely,
one you've asked me
67
00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:07,680
after you showed me your vagina.
68
00:03:07,680 --> 00:03:10,520
Right, there you go. Yes?
69
00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,680
OK, so, let's get ready.
70
00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:14,720
Get ready.
71
00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:17,400
And jump! Don't worry, don't worry.
72
00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:20,120
The lift will go round
and we'll have another go.
73
00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,960
You're doing really well.
What's happening?
74
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:25,600
It's just going through the...
75
00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:27,400
..through the roof bit
before it goes down.
76
00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:28,440
CLANGING
77
00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,360
All right?
It'll be light again soon.
78
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:32,520
Something's wrong! Look! OK.
79
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:36,200
Jesus Christ.
We call this a cord prolapse.
80
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,880
Ideally, it would happen on labour
ward, not in a mad lift.
81
00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:41,480
OK, Andrea,
everything's going to be fine.
82
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:43,000
I mean, it might be fine.
83
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,520
If the cord gets cold,
then baby stops getting blood.
84
00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,480
No more blood, no more baby.
85
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:50,360
Right, hold it inside.
You understand? Inside.
86
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,040
Yeah. Come on, come on, come on.
87
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:54,400
Are you the SHO? Staff lifts now.
88
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,280
Bring a hospital bed
and a box of gloves.
89
00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:58,520
Literally now. Cord prolapse.
90
00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,840
SHE CRIES OUT Right, come on, Andrea,
91
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,320
we need to get off. Get ready.
92
00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:05,040
And jump! Jump! Jump!
Can't! Fuck it.
93
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:06,560
Come on. OK?
94
00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:08,480
ANDREA SCREAMS
95
00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:11,120
Andrea, stay there.
96
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:14,760
Get her up on the bed.
Knee-elbow position,
97
00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:16,560
replace the cord,
get her round to theatre.
98
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,760
I'm going to change into some
scrubs. You consent her.
99
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:21,400
Consent her for...?
A deep-tissue massage.
100
00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,240
It's a cord prolapse!
101
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,480
Caesarean! Oh, well, when you say,
102
00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:28,040
"knee-elbow position"...
103
00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:29,400
My mistake, sorry.
104
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,480
Your outfit looks a lot like
what the doctors wear.
105
00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:32,840
ANDREA SCREAMS
106
00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,120
I'll do this. You push the bed.
107
00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:35,480
Get up on here. That's it.
108
00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:40,280
A bit less Alton Towers.
109
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:41,920
I'm so sorry.
110
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:43,520
Why don't I drive?
111
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,000
You go and find the anaesthetist.
112
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,040
That's the doctor
that makes you go sleep-sleep.
113
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:48,720
SHE GROANS
114
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,040
I've found the husband.
115
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,560
He's just coming up from reception.
116
00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:54,400
OK, Andrea, this is going to be
fine. You'll have a baby
117
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:57,400
in five minutes. And is free?
Yep, free. Completely free.
118
00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:59,080
We're not even allowed
to accept tips.
119
00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:00,600
SHE GASPS
120
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,800
Dr Adam, you should see me next.
It's really urgent.
121
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,240
Really? Erika, darling, can you just
take a seat for me, please?
122
00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:08,800
Tracy! How was Majorca?
Did Mick like the hotel?
123
00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,480
Erika, just go back to triage.
124
00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:12,000
HE SPEAKS ROMANIAN
125
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,720
I did explain that the doctor
would be
126
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,880
holding the cord inside. HE SPEAKS ROMANIAN
127
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,360
Probably didn't tell him I'd be
wearing her like Kermit the Frog.
128
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:19,760
I don't understand.
129
00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:24,080
That's baby's heartbeat.
Welcome to the NHS.
130
00:05:24,080 --> 00:05:26,480
ANDREA CRIES OUT
131
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:28,480
BABY CRIES
132
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:34,920
This is obs and gynae.
133
00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:37,440
Also known as brats and twats.
134
00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,600
You're generally
sailing the ship alone...
135
00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:45,320
..a ship that's massive
and on fire and no-one's had
136
00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:46,960
the time to teach you how to sail.
137
00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:50,640
It's literally life or death here.
138
00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:53,840
And you're constantly being
splashed by bodily fluids.
139
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:55,680
Not even the fun kind.
140
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:02,200
But what other doctors can say they
end up with twice the number of
141
00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:04,320
patients they started with?
142
00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,280
Beat that, geriatrics.
143
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,640
Clothes bill means I'm...
144
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:12,880
..probably running my job
at a loss, though.
145
00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:28,760
Ah, Mr Lockhart. Having fun there?
146
00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:32,160
I was just... Yeah, I'm not entirely
convinced I want to know.
147
00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:34,240
I don't know if you heard,
there was a massive
148
00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:35,840
cord prolapse before.
149
00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:38,600
Erm, crash section.
Got the baby out in 90 seconds.
150
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,200
I heard that you rocked up
ten minutes late,
151
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:43,760
nearly killed a patient
in the maintenance lift,
152
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:46,880
then did a Caesarean section
in casualwear.
153
00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:48,760
It was more that I took
a short cut.
154
00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:51,240
Doctors aren't meant to take
short cuts, Adam.
155
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:53,360
Remember when I asked you
to be an acting registrar?
156
00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,600
Can you try acting like
a bloody registrar?
157
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,160
I'll be in my office
if you need me,
158
00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:01,240
which I strongly suggest you won't.
159
00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:04,800
You've missed a bit.
160
00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:12,120
SCREAMING
161
00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:16,880
PORTER: Mind out, please, mind out.
162
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:30,200
WOMAN: It's really urgent!
I know, petal, but I promise you
163
00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,920
the doctor won't be long.
Pinkie promise?
164
00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:34,120
Pinkie promise with a little cherry
on top.
165
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,920
Oh!
166
00:07:35,920 --> 00:07:38,480
Why don't you head back
to where you were sitting?
167
00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:44,080
Moany old trout. Morning, Ria.
Morning, Dr Kay.
168
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,200
Oh, there he is! Ward round, Trace?
169
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,160
Can I ask you
something personal, darling?
170
00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:50,000
Is it, "Why do you look
like shit this morning?"
171
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:51,360
I wasn't going to ask it like that.
172
00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:52,760
I slept in my car last night.
173
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:56,520
Well, it must be hard
maintaining a relationship,
174
00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:58,320
what, with your job...
175
00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:00,840
..and your personality.
176
00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,400
Tracy's the head midwife
on today.
177
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,560
I'd let her sew up
my sister's perineum...
178
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:08,440
..which sounds weird,
now that I've said it,
179
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,240
but it's actually the highest
compliment I can give.
180
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,720
Oh, remember to remove the thick,
shiny layer on the outside.
181
00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:15,960
Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to
her senses and dumped him.
182
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,760
No-one's dumped anyone.
But if you do want to smack him,
183
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,560
I will turn a blind eye.
184
00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:22,720
Do you mind if we
nip to Room 8 first?
185
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,200
She's making pretty slow progress.
186
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:28,240
Pop downstairs and review
Mrs Buckstar quickly.
187
00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:30,680
Doctors speak a lot of code,
so it's "epididymo-orchitis"
188
00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,880
rather than "gammy cock and balls".
189
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:34,760
"Review Mrs Buckstar,"
"Go to Starbucks."
190
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,200
Which ward is Mrs Buckstar in?
191
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,680
He wants you to get him a fancy
coffee without me knowing.
192
00:08:38,680 --> 00:08:41,240
PHONE VIBRATING
Milk and one sugar for me, please.
193
00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:51,600
I'm in labour, Mother,
not quadriplegic.
194
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,440
Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors.
195
00:08:54,440 --> 00:08:57,000
I'm afraid I've got some bad news.
196
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,640
You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong.
197
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:03,840
Would you like a sweetie, dear?
198
00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:06,040
The doctor's not going to
give me better care
199
00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:09,480
because you offer him a Murray Mint.
In fairness, I might, actually.
200
00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:14,920
All right?
201
00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,240
You've got a little bit stuck
at six centimetres,
202
00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:21,840
so I suggest we wang the dose up
203
00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:23,960
on the drip that's helping
your contractions...
204
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,720
Is "wang" a medical term? Sure is.
205
00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:27,880
And if that doesn't work,
we'll, erm...
206
00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:33,760
Anna, let's put the Synto onto 84
and re-examine in four hours.
207
00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,680
It won't be me, actually.
I'll be home by then.
208
00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:37,640
Really? Well, I've been here
15 hours.
209
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:40,760
If I stay any longer, they'll start
charging me council tax.
210
00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:42,920
Right. Don't worry, darling,
211
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:45,920
I'll do it, so at least
it'll be a familiar face.
212
00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:47,920
Could you do the examination
instead, Doctor?
213
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:51,160
It does make more sense
for Tracy to do it.
214
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:53,680
Where did you train?
TRACY: Would you like me to pop home
215
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,200
and get my degree certificates?
216
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,520
There's no way
you could stay, is there?
217
00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,520
Erm, I'm not sure I like
where this is going.
218
00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:02,120
You're not saying I can't choose who
219
00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,080
does intimate examinations on me,
are you?
220
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,640
I'm saying you won't be choosing
based on the colour of their skin.
221
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:10,840
Adam! What? When did anyone say
anything about skin colour?
222
00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:12,360
It's called patient choice.
223
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,800
It's important to have choice,
like tonight I might...
224
00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:18,080
..choose to order a pizza
rather than firebomb a mosque.
225
00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:19,760
I think what Dr Kay meant to say...
226
00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:22,520
What I'm saying is, I know it's
stressful being on labour ward,
227
00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:24,800
but anything more like this,
and I will have to have you
228
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:26,640
removed from the building.
Is that understood?
229
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:30,360
OK. OK, let's crack on, shall we?
230
00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:32,440
PATIENT: Wanker.
231
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:34,200
That had better be a crossword
answer.
232
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,560
No, dear, she called you a wanker.
233
00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:43,720
What the hell was all that about?
234
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:46,400
I guess white supremacists
have babies, too.
235
00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:48,160
Not her. You.
236
00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:51,640
Me? I don't need a white knight
to defend my honour.
237
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,160
Hang on. I'm the registrar.
238
00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:54,760
Acting registrar.
239
00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:57,640
I'm the most senior doctor here.
Until somebody more senior turns up.
240
00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:01,920
Well, I'm running this ward now, and
it's up to me... No, I'm running
241
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:04,080
this ward, young man,
and I'm more than capable
242
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,200
of handling myself,
and the moment that I can't,
243
00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:07,840
I'll let somebody know,
244
00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,360
and I don't want to spoil
the surprise - it won't be you.
245
00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:14,000
And don't tell the patients
that you're kicking them out.
246
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:16,280
This is the NHS,
not your golf club.
247
00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:17,920
Which room are we kicking out?
248
00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:19,320
PHONE BUZZES No, we're not kicking
249
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,280
anybody out, Benilda.
They're all in labour,
250
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,680
so we thought we might wait
until they had their babies.
251
00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:25,280
Well, get a move on.
252
00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:27,240
The hospital's
on red alert for beds.
253
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,400
We're actually more than
halfway to black alert.
254
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,960
So, like, dusky-merlot alert.
255
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,240
Can you, er, go to gynae?
256
00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:37,960
The lady in bed 17's fit for home.
257
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:40,560
I'm actually in the middle
of a ward round.
258
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:42,960
But, yeah, I mean,
I'll find a moment.
259
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,600
Before you do that, you'll need to
260
00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,600
fill out an incident form
for Room 8. Hang on,
261
00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:49,040
I didn't have to do one
for the cord prolapse.
262
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,480
ALARM BLARES
263
00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:01,880
Erika?
NURSE: Third attendance this week
264
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:04,400
with non-specific symptoms. ALARM STOPS
265
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:07,400
OK, everybody, back to your jobs.
We don't need the Polyphonic Spree.
266
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,040
Shoo, shoo. Oh. Come on.
267
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,880
Not you!
268
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,000
Oh! Oh, God, I'm so sorry.
269
00:12:17,120 --> 00:12:20,240
Right, surprise me.
What's the management?
270
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,160
Right. Er...
271
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,720
OK, well, I would, erm...
272
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,520
..check for a patent airway,
273
00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:28,160
er, then I would put her
274
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,360
in the left lateral position,
run high oxygen flow
275
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,080
through a non-rebreather mask,
erm, check for
276
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,360
a pulse...
277
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:37,600
So near and yet so shit.
278
00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:41,400
So, when people
are really unconscious...
279
00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:45,880
..their hands
smash into their faces.
280
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:52,160
PHONE BUZZES
281
00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:56,840
Adam?
282
00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:57,960
Adam!
283
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:00,760
Adam?
284
00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,680
Do you think I'm rubbish?
285
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:04,960
Look, I wasn't great
on my first week, either.
286
00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,920
I've been here two months!
287
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,240
Two months?
Well, I just haven't had a chance
288
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,400
to do much hands-on stuff yet.
289
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:16,040
How many babies have you delivered?
290
00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:17,560
Erm...
291
00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:19,520
No babies have needed delivery
in two months?
292
00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:21,520
Everyone's always too busy
to teach me.
293
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,280
You just need to be
less of a wallflower.
294
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:24,840
It's dog eat dog in this place.
295
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,160
And...
296
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:29,560
..the dogs eat wallflowers.
297
00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,200
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I've been elbow-deep in a patient,
298
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:37,600
I've had an ethnostate in Room 8
and someone else playing dead.
299
00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:39,760
Oh, and I've got blood
matted into my pubes.
300
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:41,400
ON PHONE: I love it
when you talk dirty.
301
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:43,000
Right, so, who did you say you were?
302
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,680
My name's Harry.
303
00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:46,560
When you called my mother.
304
00:13:46,560 --> 00:13:48,360
I said I was your fuck buddy.
305
00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:51,920
I said I was your flatmate.
306
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:53,800
But she knows we've only got
one bedroom.
307
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,240
Wild idea, but you know you
could just...tell her about us?
308
00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:58,520
You don't know her. She'll turn
you into stone, or something.
309
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,320
Nah. Mums love me.
It's like my superpower.
310
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:03,160
How are we going
to fake our own deaths,
311
00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:04,560
then, before Greg's stag do?
312
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,440
I'm thinking avalanche,
helicopter crash...
313
00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:09,040
Ah, it'll be a laugh.
Carbon-monoxide poisoning?
314
00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:11,040
PAGER BEEPS Shouldn't you pop along,
315
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:13,440
seeing as you're the best man?
Crap. I was meant to go to gynae.
316
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,320
Sorry, call you later.
Don't apologise.
317
00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:16,960
That's the longest call
we've had in months.
318
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,600
I was starting to get bored.
319
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,200
# No-no, no, no
320
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:24,920
# No-no-no, no, no-no, no
321
00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:26,520
# No, no-no
322
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,120
# No, no, no-no
323
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,560
# No-no, no, no
324
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:31,080
# No-no, no, no
325
00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:32,960
# No-no, no, no-no, no
326
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:35,440
# Nobody can do the
# Shing-a-ling... #
327
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:36,840
Erm, good news, Mrs W.
328
00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:39,040
You are finally free to go home.
329
00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,560
Are you stupid?
330
00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,480
I was told you were good to go,
but, yeah, you don't look great.
331
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,040
Speak for yourself.
332
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:50,440
PAGER BEEPS
333
00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:52,920
Erm, must have been
a bit of a mix-up.
334
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,560
I'll come back later.
I need to see someone else now.
335
00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:57,160
Hopefully a hairdresser.
336
00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:00,000
# Skate
# Like I do
337
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,400
# Nobody can do
# Boogaloo
338
00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:03,440
# Like I do
339
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:04,920
# Nobody can do
# Philly
340
00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:06,440
# Like I do
341
00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:09,880
# Well, don't you know
I'm gonna skate right through... #
342
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:11,440
Dr Kay, you're needed in Room 4.
343
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:12,840
Yes, I know...
344
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:15,600
# When I go to Philly, I do
345
00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:17,760
# Ain't nobody doin' it but me, babe
346
00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:19,160
# Nobody but me
347
00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:21,000
# Well, let me tell you, nobody
348
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,360
GROANING
349
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:25,320
# But nobody but me
350
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:26,920
# Let me tell you, nobody
351
00:15:26,920 --> 00:15:29,880
# Nobody
Nobody...
352
00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:32,960
Never actually let the patient
see the forceps.
353
00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:35,720
The only people happy
with two-foot-long metal salad tongs
354
00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:37,920
inserted in their vaginas
are people who aren't aware
355
00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:40,000
that there are two-foot-long
metal salad tongs
356
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,240
inserted in their vaginas.
357
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:45,000
It's only a few more minutes.
Shut up, Graham!
358
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,120
And put your shirt back on.
Just breathe.
359
00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,120
That's what's important. SHE GROANS
360
00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:51,200
You're doing so good.
361
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,520
You're doing so well.
362
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:55,760
You're doing so well,
my little soldier!
363
00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,680
Shut up, Graham.
I'm going to play the song now.
364
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:03,080
GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS Seen one before? Yes...
365
00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:04,920
See one, do one, teach one.
366
00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,480
PATIENT: I don't like this song.
367
00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:07,880
Change the song, change the song.
368
00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,800
Wait for a contraction.
369
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:13,080
And pull.
370
00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,680
You got to keep breathing.
371
00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:16,000
PATIENT CRIES OUT
372
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,240
Just find your centre, baby.
373
00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:19,600
No stress. Graham...
374
00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:22,000
PHONE BUZZES
375
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,520
Dr Kay speaking.
It's Greg. You've not answered
376
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,760
any emails in four days. No-one even
knows where we're meeting.
377
00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:30,160
Push, push, push, push, push!
Pull as hard as you can! Now!
378
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:31,880
Oh, God, tell me
you're not having sex.
379
00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,280
Just on labour ward right now.
I know it's traditional
380
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,600
for the best man to humiliate
the groom on his stag do,
381
00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,560
and traditionally that involves
handcuffs and a sex worker...
382
00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:41,120
Just put some oomph into it.
383
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,400
Welly's threatening to take over
and drag us all to a strip club.
384
00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:45,280
No, no, no, we won't be
going to...breast clinic.
385
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,240
If this doesn't work,
will we have to do a Caesarean?
386
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,840
It will work. Erm, look, it's all
going to be civilised, don't worry.
387
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:53,320
You say, "Don't worry," but you'll
understand why I am still worried.
388
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,840
Tell everyone 8 o'clock
upstairs at the Crown.
389
00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:58,200
I'll see you later. I really need to
get back to this vagina.
390
00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,520
Yeah, well, you're definitely
not having sex, then.
391
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,320
GRAHAM: You got to
stay breathing, OK?
392
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,200
That's it, that's it.
You're doing brilliantly.
393
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,920
Thanks. I was talking
to the patient.
394
00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:08,880
Nice and slowly, nice and slowly.
Don't let her tear.
395
00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,680
You're so beautiful!
Graham, just stop.
396
00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:13,040
Nice and slowly, nice and...
397
00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:16,440
Dad, do you want to come down
and see baby being born?
398
00:17:16,440 --> 00:17:19,560
Oh, my God, where's its face?!
What's the matter with his face?!
399
00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:21,720
PATIENT SCREAMS
400
00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:23,840
BABY CRIES His face is fine.
401
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:25,800
Just on the front of his head,
not the back.
402
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:28,080
Remember I said,
"Don't let her tear"?
403
00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:45,200
Adam's a good name. HE CHUCKLES
404
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:50,680
You've got a bit of a tear
going into the back passage.
405
00:17:50,680 --> 00:17:52,560
We'll get you round to theatre,
406
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:55,320
and have that repaired nicely
for you.
407
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:57,320
Won't take more than an hour or so.
408
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:23,960
HE CLEARS THROAT
409
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:34,080
SHE SNIFFS
410
00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:40,200
Adam, I'm so sorry.
I wish I could've sewn it up myself.
411
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:42,280
I've just never actually done it...
It's fine.
412
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,320
Besides, my genitals
were wondering why
413
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:46,360
they hadn't been covered
in blood for a few hours.
414
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:54,160
Better do an incident form.
415
00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,040
How are we doing here, then?
416
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,560
All under control, Mr Lockhart.
417
00:18:57,560 --> 00:18:59,320
Miracles never cease.
Could you just have...
418
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,480
I thought I told you to
discharge that gynae patient.
419
00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:02,880
I see the miracles have ceased.
420
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,240
No. But she's not even...
421
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,880
Are my team causing you trouble,
Ms Mendoza?
422
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,360
We're full on labour ward.
423
00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:11,040
Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae.
I don't know how we're supposed
424
00:19:11,040 --> 00:19:12,760
to admit anyone from A&E.
425
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:15,600
We've been on red alert all day, and
we're practically at black alert.
426
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:18,720
Burgundy alert, then. ALL LAUGH
427
00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:20,920
I'm sure we can do
something about that for you.
428
00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,240
Can't we, Dr Kay?
Yeah, we could pull out
429
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,480
the patient's drips,
and chuck her out the window.
430
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:27,040
I knew you'd think of something.
431
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:29,480
Leave it with us. Can I help at all?
432
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:31,480
You could pop down
to the coffee shop.
433
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,240
There's a vacancy for a barista.
434
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:36,640
Shruti did her first
forcep delivery earlier.
435
00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:38,040
Er, yeah, yeah.
436
00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:40,360
She had been in second stage
for over an hour, and we...
437
00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:42,560
Very good. Walk with me, Adam.
438
00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:46,440
Quick story for you.
439
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,560
So, there's this
acting obstetric registrar,
440
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:53,360
and he walks into a room
and he calls his patient a Nazi.
441
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,520
Oh, you're making it so much worse
than it was.
442
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,840
She was being racist to Tracy...
Every mother and baby
443
00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,360
on this ward is relying
on your good decisions,
444
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:03,280
and your good judgment.
Apologise to Tracy,
445
00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,040
apologise to the patient,
446
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,760
and send some people home.
447
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:09,960
Oh, and, Adam?
448
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,840
Stop being shit.
449
00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:13,640
# You hit me once
I hit you back
450
00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:15,080
PAGER BEEPS
451
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:16,760
# You gave a kick
I gave a slap
452
00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:20,720
# You smashed a plate over my head
Then I set fire to our bed
453
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,480
# You hit me once
I hit you back... #
454
00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:28,200
Rachel Glover?
455
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,600
Kerry Salisbury?
456
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:32,840
Caroline Morobeto?
457
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:38,880
# Oh, my black eye casts no shadow
458
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:41,400
# Your red eye sees no blame
459
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:43,720
# Your slaps don't stick
Your kicks don't hit
460
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,520
# So we remain the same
461
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:47,720
# Blood sticks, sweat drips
462
00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:49,920
# Break the lock if it don't fit
463
00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:52,120
# A kick in the teeth
is good for some
464
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:54,320
# A kiss with a fist
is better than none
465
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:58,280
# Whoa
466
00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:01,400
# A kiss with a fist
is better than none. #
467
00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:08,280
So, you've recovered from earlier.
468
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,560
Oh, yes.
Oh, God, sorry, Dr Adam.
469
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:11,920
I don't know what came over me.
470
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:13,840
So, remind me, how many weeks
are you?
471
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:16,160
Oh, God, I hate maths.
472
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,560
I couldn't even tell you
in months. Er...
473
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:21,320
Erm, OK, let's think.
474
00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:24,280
So... Birthday's in June.
475
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:25,400
I'll be 27...
476
00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:30,040
Well, it's got to be,
like, 2,000 weeks?
477
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:33,080
You're 25 weeks.
478
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,280
Oh!
479
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:37,680
You mean the baby.
480
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:40,200
SHE LAUGHS
481
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:43,960
So, erm, what's the...problem?
482
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:48,200
Well, I woke up this morning
with a headache,
483
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:52,240
and my tongue is just, like,
totally covered in spots.
484
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:54,040
Right. Let's have a look.
485
00:21:58,360 --> 00:22:00,080
OK.
486
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:06,520
I'm afraid that what you have
is known as...
487
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,320
..taste buds.
488
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,280
Oh. SHE LAUGHS
489
00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:18,480
So, is there someone at home
we can call
490
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:20,240
to come and collect you,
491
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:22,320
or do you live here now?
492
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,800
Oh, God, no, who'd want
to live with me?
493
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:28,840
PAGER BEEPS
494
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:30,360
Right.
495
00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:38,320
Adam, that lady you just saw,
her blood pressure's a bit high.
496
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:40,960
Do you want me to send her for
some bloods? Just send her home.
497
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:44,160
No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods.
498
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,120
Yep?
499
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,160
What's the trace like?
500
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:54,880
Isn't the evening registrar
here yet?
501
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,600
OK. Fine.
502
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,840
Right, we're doing a Caesarean
for Room 8.
503
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,680
Dr Adam? Dr Adam,
sorry, sorry, I meant to say.
504
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,000
My teeth have become
a bit itchy.
505
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,480
Send her home.
506
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:11,640
Don't ask to do it. I'm tired.
507
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,240
I need to be gone ten minutes ago.
508
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:14,880
Erm, so, we're all good to go.
509
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,440
We'll have baby out in five minutes,
510
00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:19,960
and may I just say,
I misspoke before
511
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:23,160
and I'm very sorry.
All water under the bridge.
512
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,160
But just checking it will be you
doing this operation
513
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,000
and nobody else.
514
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:30,640
Yes.
515
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,280
Yes, it will. Yeah.
516
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:41,320
Actually, fuck it. You've got
to learn some time. You're up.
517
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,200
Come on, you've seen one.
Y-Yeah...
518
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:46,000
So you know the routine.
See one, fuck one up, teach one.
519
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,800
Really? Thank you.
520
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,400
Are you sure?
Not especially. Come on.
521
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,240
Are you happy?
522
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,160
Right, come on.
523
00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:09,400
This it? Yeah. Hurry up, please,
524
00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,840
I think the anaesthetist's
retiring next week.
525
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,480
Adam? Mm?
526
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:20,960
Stretch it. Come on.
Harder than that.
527
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:22,840
Right, through the peritoneum, then.
528
00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:27,480
Pop your finger in. You're not
going to damage anything.
529
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,640
OK.
530
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,080
Oh!
531
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,040
Adam? Adam?
532
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:39,720
Er, yeah, OK, good. Great.
So, you're going to make
533
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,280
a U-shape in the lower segment
of the uterus,
534
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,280
and then you're going to extend
it with your fingers.
535
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:45,880
What if there isn't a lower segment?
536
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,120
You know, like if
it's before 32 weeks.
537
00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:50,320
Yeah, we usually save
the Q&A session for afterwards.
538
00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:53,000
It would just be a horrible, bloody
mess. Come on, get on with it.
539
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:54,880
Is that...? Good.
540
00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:56,400
Now what?
541
00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,600
I think even you can guess
what happens next. Come on.
542
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:00,280
That's it.
543
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,320
Just guide the head out.
It's coming.
544
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:05,320
OK.
545
00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:08,280
That's it.
546
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,720
One baby coming up...
547
00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:14,360
BABY CRIES
548
00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:20,000
No, get her off me.
I'm not having a Paki
549
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,080
delivering my baby! Get her off me!
550
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:25,560
Stop touching it! You promised
that you would do it!
551
00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:28,200
Excuse me, get me out of this!
Take this!
552
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:29,920
What is this? Get this off me!
553
00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:32,240
Adolf's a good name.
Mum, will you do something?!
554
00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:36,000
You did really well.
555
00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:39,600
One Caesarean down, 8,000 to go.
556
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:43,400
To be fair, they don't normally
end like that.
557
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,720
Erm, write up the notes and
mention that I closed the skin.
558
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:52,760
Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful?
559
00:26:06,120 --> 00:26:07,760
Oh, for...
560
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:12,400
PHONE RINGS
561
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,200
Cancellations hotline.
562
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,800
Press 1 for you need to stay
at work, leaving me to make
563
00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:21,960
small talk with 20 public-school
dickheads I barely know.
564
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:25,080
That's unfair.
There's only 15 of them.
565
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:26,520
And I'm just leaving now.
566
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:29,800
No way! Can you bring
a change of clothes, please?
567
00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:32,240
Yeah. Anything in particular?
568
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:33,440
Erm, something smart-casual
569
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,240
and not totally encrusted
with a stranger's blood?
570
00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:38,240
Hula skirt and feather boa
it is, then.
571
00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:40,120
HE CHUCKLES See you in a bit.
572
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:45,960
You can't help being ill, darling.
573
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:48,320
I'll just get somebody else
to pick her up.
574
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:51,400
Right. Bye-bye.
575
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,240
Er, Adam?
576
00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:55,200
I saw what you did to that dolphin.
577
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,280
A gentleman never discusses
a lady's blowhole.
578
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:59,600
Do you want my advice, Adam?
Erm, not really.
579
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:01,240
That is exactly your problem.
580
00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:03,200
It was pretty funny, though, right?
581
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:24,440
# Prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one
582
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:27,520
# This is the flight number
583
00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:30,520
# Of our galactic sun
584
00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:37,480
# Prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one
585
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:40,200
# Before we start
586
00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:45,160
# You should know that
you're not the only one
587
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:46,600
# Who can hurt me... #
588
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,520
ENGINE STARTS
589
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,720
It's my second-favourite doctor!
590
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:07,960
Who's number one?
591
00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:09,480
David Tennant. First series.
592
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:15,640
How was work?
Fine, thanks. Who are they?
593
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:18,000
No idea, but they're better
craic than your mates upstairs.
594
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:19,320
Oh, come on.
595
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:21,480
I'm sure you'll find something
in common with them.
596
00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:24,160
There you go. See?
Wearing the same T-shirt.
597
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:26,560
Some guy called...Welly
brought them.
598
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:29,160
Well, they're not
too terrible, considering.
599
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:34,840
Shall we just do this? Come on.
600
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:38,600
SHOUTING AND CHEERING
601
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:44,600
Ah! 7:58. There you go.
602
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,840
I knew you wouldn't let me down.
603
00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:51,560
No, you didn't. Yeah, fine.
May have lost a small bet.
604
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,960
Nightmare! This place doesn't do
Jagerbombs!
605
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:55,320
Whatever will we do?
606
00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:58,560
Adster! Welly. Don't do that.
607
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:03,680
Where's your T-shirt?
Yeah, Adster, where's your T-shirt?
608
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:05,320
Put it on.
609
00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:08,840
CHANTING: Put it on.
610
00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:15,600
Put it on, put it on,
put it on, put it on!
611
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:18,120
Yes! And as for you...
612
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,480
..one pint of gin.
613
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:21,880
No, I'm not going to drink that.
614
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:24,120
Well, you will be, because it's
tradi-ti-on. How can it be
615
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:25,840
a tradition? I've never got
married before.
616
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,480
Right, I need a drink.
Is this my stuff?
617
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:30,920
So, did your mum call?
She left a voicemail.
618
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:32,920
Ah. And you didn't listen.
619
00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:35,920
No. I'm changing my number
and moving to Venezuela.
620
00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:38,960
You done there?
621
00:29:38,960 --> 00:29:40,480
BOTH LAUGH
622
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,320
Right, come on, what do you want?
623
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:46,040
I think 12 litres of vodka Red Bull
should probably do it.
624
00:29:46,040 --> 00:29:48,600
Er, can I get a bottle
of Sauvignon Blanc and...
625
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:50,240
PHONE BUZZES
626
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,960
..a rum and Coke, please?
This'll be Jakesy.
627
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,960
He's probably gone to Poland
by mistake. Hello?
628
00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:57,800
ON PHONE: Kay.
Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a...
629
00:29:57,800 --> 00:29:59,440
CHANTING: Pint of gin, pint of gin!
630
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:01,160
..supermarket.
631
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:03,440
Sorry, Mr Lockhart, how can I help?
632
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,280
Er, listen, the locum registrar
633
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,760
hasn't turned up
for the night shift.
634
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:12,120
Erm... Who's the senior reg?
635
00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:15,080
Er, I don't think he'd get here
from Sydney in time.
636
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,960
Well, do say if you've got
something more important on.
637
00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:21,600
Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm...
638
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:23,160
No, I can do it.
639
00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:24,920
Will the missus understand?
640
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,600
She'll be fine with it.
Good man. Bye!
641
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,240
LOCKHART HANGS UP
642
00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:41,080
How long are you going to be?
A couple of hours?
643
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,880
12. I'm so sorry. And there's
no-one else who could...?
644
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:48,960
I'm sorry. It's really crap for you.
645
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:56,200
You don't have to stay here,
obviously. I'll be grand.
646
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,160
I've never had a...pint of gin
before.
647
00:31:00,320 --> 00:31:02,760
Just a couple more years,
then I'll be a consultant,
648
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:05,160
and it'll just be me,
you and an Aston Martin.
649
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:08,320
It would be nice to live
somewhere a bit more spacious.
650
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:10,320
We can shower
in the glove compartment.
651
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:12,200
Right, go on. You've got
some babies to deliver.
652
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,640
You should have gone along
with my avalanche idea.
653
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:20,400
OK, your first best-manly duty
is to rescue my dad.
654
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,320
Welly's trying to get him to
drink a shoe full of sambuca.
655
00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:25,280
Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca!
656
00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:30,040
You're going to hate me.
657
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:32,720
There's a...staffing emergency
at the hospital.
658
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:34,400
There's no doctors on labour ward.
659
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:38,360
No. So I have to go back in.
Drink this. Then you can't go in.
660
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:43,040
I can't.
OK, give me one good reason.
661
00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:44,480
Er...
662
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,520
Er, because I, erm...
Because you'd rather be at work.
663
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:50,400
Yeah, have a good night, mate.
664
00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,080
Fuck's sake!
665
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:46,960
Do you want
the good news or the bad news?
666
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,400
Erm, the good. Oh, I was worried
you'd say that.
667
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,200
It's all bad, I'm afraid.
668
00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:52,960
The wards are stuffed to the gills,
669
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:56,600
there's no SHO, and
the midwife in charge is Tracy.
670
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:58,760
Well, she was working during
the day. The other one.
671
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,960
"Non-Reassuring Trace."
672
00:33:01,960 --> 00:33:03,760
Right, I'm off home.
But call me whenever.
673
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:05,640
I won't. Good man.
674
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:10,160
You're very intent on
showing me your penis today.
675
00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:12,200
They need to increase the credits
676
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,440
on the scrub machine.
You can practically tell
677
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:17,000
who did your circumcision.
Made a right meal of it.
678
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:23,240
WOMAN: Keep going.
679
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,280
Hi, Trace. How can I help?
Oh, Doctor, thank God you're here.
680
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:34,280
Can you see Room 11 for me?
681
00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,760
I'm desperately worried
about her.
682
00:33:36,760 --> 00:33:39,160
Quick as you can.
683
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:40,920
WOMAN SCREAMS
684
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:53,360
BABY CRIES
685
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:04,520
Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing.
686
00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:09,160
No, I didn't take a photo!
It's someone else's baby!
687
00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:11,840
Yeah, I know,
Mum said the exact same thing.
688
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:14,160
Actually, I'm not going to
make it home this weekend,
689
00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:16,920
but, erm... SHE SPEAKS HINDI
690
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:20,560
Mm-hm. Yeah,
erm, I love you, too. OK. Bye.
691
00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:21,920
Bye.
692
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,880
What the hell
are you still doing here?
693
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,480
Don't you have a depressing flat
to go back to?
694
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:28,760
The incident forms
are longer than you think.
695
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:30,400
Just go home.
696
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:32,920
I'll do yours when I do mine.
697
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:35,040
This is yours. Oh, no way!
698
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:36,560
ALARM BLARES
699
00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:39,320
I wouldn't break a sweat.
Non-Reassuring-Tracey's on.
700
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,160
The patient's probably farted.
701
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:42,880
WOMAN SCREAMS
702
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,320
25 weeks. First baby.
703
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:52,160
Blood pressure's through the roof.
704
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:55,040
SHE SCREAMS Grade one Caesarean section.
705
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:56,880
Get anaesthetics round
to theatres now.
706
00:34:56,880 --> 00:34:59,640
Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker
with placental abruption.
707
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,480
Severe pre-eclampsia.
708
00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,520
Turns out I probably
shouldn't have sent her home.
709
00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:06,560
Erika, listen. I'm very worried
about your baby.
710
00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:08,880
Placenta's coming away.
I need to deliver you immediately
711
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:10,680
to save baby's life.
712
00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:13,600
It's too early! I'm going to perform
a Caesarean section.
713
00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:15,960
Do you understand? SHE SCREAMS
714
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:20,520
Do you want your consultant in?
715
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,280
I've got this, thanks, Tracy.
716
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:26,320
Is my sister here? We've called her,
and she'll be here in time
717
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,840
to say hello to your baby.
Or goodbye.
718
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:32,640
Why don't you count down
from 20 for me?
719
00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:35,160
20, 19...18...
720
00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:36,760
Come on.
721
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,680
Are you happy? Ready when you are.
722
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,560
Adam, have you done a 25-week
Caesarean before? No.
723
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:45,120
I've seen one.
724
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,920
Pull. Quick. And retractor in.
725
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:48,560
Adam?
726
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,360
MAN: Yeah, chest movement. Adam?
727
00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:54,440
Adam! Er, sorry. Swabs, please.
728
00:36:54,440 --> 00:36:56,280
Let's start the suction.
729
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:05,240
Oh, my God.
730
00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:09,320
Come on. Shit.
731
00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:12,120
Pressures aren't great here.
What's the blood loss like?
732
00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:13,960
Er, it's a litre,
a litre-and-a-half.
733
00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:16,080
Can you bleep the on-call
haematologist?
734
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:18,880
I'm going to need some more blood
products.
735
00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:21,600
Find out who's
the anaesthetic consultant.
736
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,560
More swabs.
737
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:31,840
I-I can't see anything.
It's too thick to stitch.
738
00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:34,520
So much blood. Shit, I can't...
739
00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:36,360
I... I can't get it under...
740
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:37,800
Fuck!
741
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:40,960
This is insane. I can't...
I can't see anything. Shit!
742
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:42,560
Fuck! Adam...
743
00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:44,240
..you can do this.
744
00:37:44,240 --> 00:37:45,800
I can't. I can't do this.
745
00:37:46,880 --> 00:37:49,440
This woman's going to die,
and it's my fault.
746
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:51,320
Shall we get Mr Lockhart in?
747
00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:58,560
Yeah. Yeah, please. Tracy,
will you call Mr Lockhart
748
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,080
and ask him to come in, please?
749
00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:03,160
I called him before you started.
Why did you do that? I...
750
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:06,160
Thank you.
751
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:42,760
HE RETCHES
752
00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:57,480
I'm really sorry.
753
00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:06,080
It was really busy,
754
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:08,720
and I genuinely thought
that she was crying wolf.
755
00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:11,800
She was crying severe
early-onset pre-eclampsia,
756
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:15,520
which you'd have known if you'd done
so much as a blood test.
757
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,120
And then, for some reason,
you attempted an operation
758
00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,160
any consultant would struggle with.
759
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,120
Oh, you can buy Tracy a box
of chocolates, by the way,
760
00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:25,760
for calling me in.
761
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,360
Can I just say...? No!
762
00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:39,200
Amend your entry from when you first
saw this patient this afternoon.
763
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,320
Write that you discussed
with me over the phone,
764
00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:46,400
and that I advised you
to send her home.
765
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:48,320
What?
766
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,480
No, you don't have to do that.
767
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:52,560
Well, you didn't have to
come in tonight.
768
00:39:55,280 --> 00:39:56,800
I did. Yeah, you did.
769
00:40:10,240 --> 00:40:12,720
Hi. Um...
770
00:40:12,720 --> 00:40:14,600
..something to keep you going.
771
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:48,960
SLAM
772
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,400
PHONE BUZZES
773
00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:50,280
Hi. I'm one of the obstetric,
erm, registrars.
774
00:41:51,240 --> 00:41:53,560
Are you lost?
775
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:55,600
Erm, I'm looking for...
776
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:57,640
..baby Van Hegan. The 25-weeker.
777
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,520
Ah! Are you the one who, er...?
778
00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:07,200
Well, you're not going to knock
over the incubator, are you?
779
00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:09,880
Bed 5.
780
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:40,120
I'm really sorry.
781
00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:44,040
I was...really tired,
and I just wanted to get home.
782
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:48,480
And...this place is insane.
783
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:51,640
And...
784
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:53,160
..I fucked up.
785
00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:55,360
I mucked up.
786
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,640
Sorry.
787
00:42:57,640 --> 00:42:59,400
I tried my best.
788
00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:06,000
WHISPERS: Just promise me
you'll have a normal head scan.
789
00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:26,960
Enjoy your last night of pussy.
790
00:43:56,760 --> 00:43:59,800
# I've been workin', baby
791
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,120
# For too long now
792
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:09,200
# Just wanna get next to you, boy
793
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,200
# I've been searchin', baby
794
00:44:15,560 --> 00:44:18,520
# A way to tell you how
795
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:23,600
# Gotta get through to you, boy
796
00:44:25,520 --> 00:44:29,480
# Never said it was sunshine
797
00:44:29,480 --> 00:44:32,560
# But you took it all of the time
798
00:44:32,560 --> 00:44:36,560
# Never said it was sunshine
799
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:39,520
# But you took it all of the time
800
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:43,400
# All of the time
801
00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:47,560
# All of the time
802
00:44:48,560 --> 00:44:50,880
# All of the time
803
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:53,440
# You took it all of the time
804
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:12,840
# There's no escaping now
805
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:15,880
# Let me show you how
806
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:20,920
# What it feels to be true
807
00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:54,480
# I've been workin', baby
808
00:45:56,720 --> 00:45:58,760
# For too long now
809
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:03,640
# Just wanna get next to you, boy
810
00:46:05,800 --> 00:46:08,760
# I've been searchin', baby
811
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:12,720
# A way to tell you how
812
00:46:14,280 --> 00:46:18,280
# Gotta get through to you, boy. #
57330
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.