Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:52,127
"One day the sun cast onto the world
2
00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:55,483
to show its image in different light.
3
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:57,165
All the lines were in place
4
00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:01,120
but in between no shape or shades,
5
00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:05,729
just shadows of the past
cast against an aging brain,
6
00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:10,761
- fading with the sunset's dying rays...
- [MAN COUGHS]
7
00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:14,328
wiping away all trace of yesterday.
8
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:21,483
[SCATTERED APPLAUSE]
9
00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:24,162
[WOMAN] Does anyone
have any questions for the author?
10
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:21,002
[GRUNTS]
11
00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:27,171
♪♪ [ETHEREAL]
12
00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:45,009
[PHONE RINGING]
13
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:54,361
Hey, Dad.
14
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:56,409
Oh, hey.
15
00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:58,244
Can you turn down the music?
16
00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:01,042
What?
17
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,565
The music, can you turn it down?
18
00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:06,289
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19
00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:08,810
- ♪♪ [STOPS]
- Sorry.
20
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:12,091
So, your super told me
21
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:15,164
that they shut your power off
22
00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:17,243
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,484
Why didn't you pay the bill?
24
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,769
Oh, because I'm through with that.
I don't need to do that anymore.
25
00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:25,729
I'm going off the map.
26
00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:27,846
What does that mean?
27
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:30,651
It means that I am through
with the whole system.
28
00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:33,091
What whole system?
29
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,810
The whole manmade system.
30
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,604
I quit my job.
31
00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,125
I'm not paying bills.
32
00:04:38,280 --> 00:04:39,441
You quit your job?
33
00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:41,523
Yeah. Yeah, I escaped it.
34
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:45,608
How... How are you gonna eat?
35
00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,802
No-no, I don't need to pay
for food anymore.
36
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:49,724
I realized that.
37
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:51,882
I can get free milk at Starbucks.
38
00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:54,361
- I can get free ketchup at McDonald's.
- Ketchup?
39
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:59,805
Yeah, the body can survive
on ketchup alone just for a long time.
40
00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:01,769
At least until the apocalypse.
41
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:07,766
Hey Marco, I'm going to stop by tomorrow,
and I'm gonna bring you some food.
42
00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,810
No-no, I don't need food.
I'm fine with ketchup.
43
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,769
- Just be at your apartment...
- Don't do that.
44
00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:14,046
Listen to me! Listen to me!
45
00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:16,043
- Be at your apartment at 6:00.
- I won't be there.
46
00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,646
I'll be there. I'll see you then. Bye.
47
00:05:22,440 --> 00:05:24,727
- They call me Luna.
- Luna!
48
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,850
Because my mind moves
in tune with the lunar shifts.
49
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,490
They call me a lunatic...
50
00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:32,682
because my biological clock's a time bomb
51
00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:35,605
that ticks down to the minute
the full moon's lit.
52
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:39,322
And I just got out of the loony bin,
53
00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:41,249
and I haven't been taking my medication,
54
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:44,364
so I'm about as unstable
as if nitro raped glycerin.
55
00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:46,648
[CHEERING]
56
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:49,565
More insane than Batman's Riddler
if Jim Carrey had played him
57
00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:51,131
without taking his Ritalin.
58
00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:53,681
I'll leave you riddles
sicker than a crossword puzzle
59
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:55,001
written by Jack The Ripper.
60
00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:57,083
Full of clues as to how I'm gonna kill you
61
00:05:57,240 --> 00:05:59,607
which I will do
right before you figure it out
62
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:02,206
so I can stick it on the ground
next to your dead body
63
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,850
and let the detectives
finish filling it out!
64
00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:07,607
[CROWD WHOOPING]
65
00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:27,408
[CARLA] "The fire went out...
66
00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:30,722
black, not even the smoke
67
00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:33,804
to sniff up the memory
of last night's wild sight
68
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:35,928
and resurrect its magic back,
69
00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:39,647
sun-burnt on the tip of a matchstick
with one flick of God's finger,
70
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:41,882
as all eternal blows out...
Lost in shadows...
71
00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:44,202
Surround my lips like vicious flint
with thrilled flicks licked with silk...
72
00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:45,407
It's going up in flames...
73
00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:46,891
As my spirit spreads!
74
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:48,610
- Get away my brains like stretching...
- [FIRE BURNING]
75
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:49,847
Chain... Can't have wings...
76
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,889
Wildfires rising high in my eyes...
77
00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:53,041
So wild...
78
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:55,407
Fire irises.
79
00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:57,965
[WOMAN LAUGHS]
80
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:02,766
I'm a flame.
81
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:06,201
- I'm a flame!
- [LAUGHTER]
82
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:13,841
[VOICES WHISPERING]
83
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,762
[DOORBELL RINGS]
84
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:41,206
- Hey.
- Hi.
85
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:42,521
- You okay?
- Yeah.
86
00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:44,682
- Can I come in?
- Yeah. Yeah, come in.
87
00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:48,164
You know it's almost 1:00 in the morning?
88
00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:50,010
Shouldn't you be sleeping?
89
00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,049
- I'm sorry.
- That's okay.
90
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:53,287
What's wrong?
91
00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:55,845
I just wanted to talk.
92
00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,447
Oh. Well, sure.
93
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,762
Can we look at some photo albums?
94
00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:03,564
Now? [CHUCKLES]
95
00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:05,722
W-Why do you want to do that?
96
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,484
Just to talk about the past.
97
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:13,808
I just don't know where they are, honey.
98
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,008
- They're lost in a huge pile...
- I know where they are.
99
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,730
- I don't think...
- I'll find them.
100
00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:33,370
Remember that?
101
00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:37,688
That was right before I got sick.
102
00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:40,605
Remember?
103
00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:46,445
What was I like?
104
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,321
Baby, you don't remember?
105
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,047
No.
106
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,525
You were the same.
107
00:09:03,680 --> 00:09:05,921
Mom, I need you to be honest with me.
108
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:09,004
You're the only one who knew me back then,
109
00:09:09,160 --> 00:09:10,650
- and I need you...
- No. That's not true.
110
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,643
There's a lot of people
in your life who knew you then.
111
00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:14,290
What was I doing...
112
00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:17,488
when it happened?
113
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:18,926
What do you mean?
114
00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:21,566
I mean, the doctors said
that something has to trigger it.
115
00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:23,085
- So, what was I doing?
- No, no.
116
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,730
There was nothing that we could've done.
117
00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:26,370
- It was gonna happen no matter what.
- No, no.
118
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:29,410
N-N-No.
I must've done something to trigger it
119
00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:31,324
- because I am not the same person, Mom.
- No, you didn't.
120
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:32,925
- I am not the same.
- You are the same.
121
00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:34,923
Would you just please,
just stop lying to me!
122
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:38,209
Okay, Carla, you are acting
really hyper right now,
123
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:40,249
and I-I... Are you sleeping okay?
124
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,209
What's going on?
125
00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:45,284
I'm just trying to figure out
who I am, you know,
126
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:47,767
because I don't feel like myself anymore.
127
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,526
Even when I go off the medication,
I don't feel like myself.
128
00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:52,330
Okay, you know what, honey?
129
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:54,642
I think we need to get Dad
because he can really help.
130
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:55,847
- No-No-No!
- No, we should.
131
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,207
No, Mom, I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have yelled. I won't yell again.
132
00:09:58,360 --> 00:09:59,691
- Please don't get Dad.
- Okay, you're right.
133
00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:01,808
Sit down. And I have a really good plan.
134
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:03,325
Okay, this is my plan.
135
00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:06,643
You're gonna spend the night tonight,
and then tomorrow morning, first thing,
136
00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:08,450
we'll go to the hospital
and get your file.
137
00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:11,251
See, they have a file of everything
about your illness.
138
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:12,890
And then you can learn anything you want.
139
00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:14,530
You can ask anything. Okay?
140
00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:17,365
We'll figure all this out. Okay?
141
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:23,648
I hate it when you look at me like that.
142
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:25,962
Like what? How am I looking at you?
143
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:30,209
Like I'm crazy.
144
00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,641
I'm not looking at you
like you're crazy, honey.
145
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:37,491
No, you're looking at me
like you don't even recognize me.
146
00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:40,644
- No. Honey, I love you.
- No.
147
00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:43,371
- You miss that person that I used to be.
- No, please don't leave.
148
00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:46,610
Donald!
149
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:53,602
Hey, what happened to your apartment?
150
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:54,761
What do you mean?
151
00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:57,486
I mean, your books are all over the floor.
152
00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:04,170
Yeah, I decided
that I liked it better this way.
153
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:08,211
You know, you can see
all the titles way more easily.
154
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:12,729
You know, and they're all placed
in different, specific locations.
155
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:13,961
It actually works out really great
156
00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:16,441
because you can just walk up
to any one of them, you know?
157
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:19,331
You can walk up to any book
you want at any time, just sit down.
158
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:23,451
And there's a good variety
of reading environments.
159
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:28,322
I don't know.
It just seems stupid, somehow,
160
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:32,087
to just want to put
a bunch of books together in one place.
161
00:11:32,240 --> 00:11:34,322
That just seems
like in-the-box thinking to me.
162
00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:36,130
- Do you know what I mean?
- Hm.
163
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:38,806
- How you sleeping?
- Good.
164
00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:42,885
I just lie down and sleep. It's good.
165
00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:44,769
That all works out.
166
00:11:46,680 --> 00:11:48,284
Been taking your medication?
167
00:11:49,320 --> 00:11:52,767
Um... mm...
168
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,247
I found that they really weren't working
for me, you know,
169
00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:02,446
kind of constricted my emotions,
you know, like a dried-up ocean.
170
00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:05,046
That wasn't the potion. [CHUCKLES]
171
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:06,366
Don't give me the lotion.
172
00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:10,161
I just, yeah, it just didn't work,
so I stopped.
173
00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:11,685
I stopped.
174
00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:13,365
You know what I found works, though?
175
00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:15,170
- What's that?
- Marijuana, Mama.
176
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:19,120
- You're smoking marijuana?
- Yeah, it actually really helps.
177
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,851
You know, it works
way better than the medication.
178
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,161
Isn't that interesting?
179
00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:27,291
I mean, I guess it has something to do
with my particular brain chemistry,
180
00:12:27,440 --> 00:12:29,602
something about that works.
181
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:31,091
Do you smoke a lot of marijuana?
182
00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:35,245
Depends on how long I'm awake for.
You know?
183
00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:37,807
Lately I haven't needed
as much sleep, so...
184
00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:41,008
[LAUGHS] I guess I have to up my dosage.
185
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:44,764
Tomorrow morning, let's go...
let's go to Dr. Lyons,
186
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:47,127
and we'll ask him and just hear
what he thinks about that.
187
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:51,365
- Who cares what he thinks?
- He's an expert on your illness.
188
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:53,204
- He'll know...
- I don't have an illness.
189
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,680
- Come on...
- Why are you bringing Dr. Lyons into this?
190
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,006
- There's nothing wrong with...
- Let's just...
191
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,242
Wait! That... what is...
192
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,880
- He's an expert on your medication.
- No, he's not a fucking expert!
193
00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:04,280
He's a goddamned Nazi!
194
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:05,487
He doesn't fucking know
195
00:13:05,680 --> 00:13:06,920
- what he's talking about, okay?
- Okay.
196
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,650
Listen. I don't have an illness.
197
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:12,964
Why don't you just, please,
come home with me tonight.
198
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:14,884
Come home?
199
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,520
- Home?
- Home. Yeah.
200
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:19,641
Right?
201
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,325
Is she there?
202
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:25,088
- Where is she?
- Who?
203
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:28,407
Mom?
204
00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:35,090
She left because she's ill.
205
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:36,526
She's ill. She...
206
00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:38,330
Why do you keep saying that?
207
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:41,450
She couldn't stand that!
And you know what happened?
208
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:43,204
- She fucking got away.
- Okay.
209
00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:45,931
You know why? Because she's a genius.
210
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,003
She's a fucking genius.
211
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:49,924
Why couldn't you see that?
212
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:55,771
Okay.
213
00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:00,160
Count to ten.
214
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,002
Remember how she used to do that?
Remember?
215
00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:05,162
Do you remember this?
216
00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:07,442
- Okay, count to ten.
- Oh, come on.
217
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,648
- Just count to ten. Ready?
- Yeah.
218
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:11,211
Okay.
219
00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:12,805
- One.
- One.
220
00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:14,610
- Two.
- Nine.
221
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:16,603
- Three.
- Eight.
222
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:18,000
- Four.
- Seven.
223
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:19,810
Five.
224
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:23,243
Six. Seven.
225
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:25,607
Eight. Nine.
226
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,404
You're it!
227
00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:29,164
Oh, Marco, no-no!
228
00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:31,969
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Fuck!
229
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:28,406
Hi. I was a patient here,
and I need a copy of my file.
230
00:15:28,560 --> 00:15:30,164
I know you're obligated to give it to me.
231
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,362
- Yes. What's your name?
- Carla. Lucia.
232
00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:34,966
L-U-C-I-A. It's right there. That one.
233
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:39,724
Can you wait just one moment?
234
00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:46,528
[SIGHS]
235
00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:56,767
Hi. I'm Dr. Strinsky.
236
00:15:57,320 --> 00:15:58,367
- Hi.
- Hi.
237
00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:02,451
I wonder if I could ask
what you want your records for?
238
00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,488
I don't have to tell you.
I know my rights.
239
00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:07,369
Oh, you're right.
You don't have to tell me.
240
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:08,521
It's just that I...
241
00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:10,648
it seems like you're upset
about something,
242
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:14,327
- and I just want to make sure that...
- No, I just want a copy of my file.
243
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,323
Sure. You can come in my office,
244
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:20,280
and I'll sit and if you have any questions
and I can clarify anything,
245
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:22,602
I'll answer your questions.
246
00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:29,811
It seems it began in college.
247
00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:31,087
No.
248
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,163
I was great in college.
249
00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:35,084
I did my best writing in college.
250
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,766
I could write all night
and then go party with my friends.
251
00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:40,082
I mean, I had tons of friends.
252
00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:44,962
I mean, I had these incredibly deep
relationships with people.
253
00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:48,010
That was probably your illness surfacing.
254
00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,085
What?
255
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:56,844
Sleeping less, being more personable,
more creative, wild.
256
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,241
Those are the beginnings of the illness.
257
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,165
You were just walking up to the edge.
258
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:05,284
Do you recognize this?
259
00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:12,524
It's a poem you wrote.
260
00:17:12,680 --> 00:17:15,251
"Please, God, let me feel what you feel.
261
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:19,769
I will stare up into the sky
with wide open eyes
262
00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:21,888
until you burn through my irises
263
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,691
and touch my mind with your fire.
264
00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:28,847
- I went to the desert.
- Yeah.
265
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:33,130
And you left this
on your desk before you went.
266
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:37,166
And then you forced your eyes open
and stared into the sun.
267
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:43,929
Is that what triggered it?
268
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,965
[CHATTERING ON POLICE RADIO]
269
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,526
Uh-uh-uh. Uh-uh-uh.
270
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:05,765
Hello, 911? I'm being held here
unlawfully at a police station...
271
00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:09,163
That was your one call.
272
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,891
But I didn't call outside the station,
so it doesn't count.
273
00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:13,881
Hm.
274
00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:16,486
I don't belong here.
This is a hospital for sick people.
275
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:18,369
I'm not sick.
276
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:21,046
I can understand why you'd be here.
You look very sick to me.
277
00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:23,686
There's no life in your face.
278
00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:25,365
You look like you're about to tip over.
279
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,967
And if you ask me, you know,
you don't need electroshock therapy.
280
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:32,169
You need some jumper cables
attached to a Mack truck
281
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:35,403
to latch to your face to light up
those dull eyes of yours.
282
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:37,528
Do you think your mind is sane right now?
283
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:39,688
More than yours.
284
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:45,609
Spreading messages in graffiti
about the end of the human race...
285
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:47,603
that doesn't seem sane to me.
286
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:51,128
Well, you're human, so you're biased.
287
00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:56,048
Do a lot of people read these messages?
288
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:57,964
Everyone.
289
00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,600
Well, how do you know?
290
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:02,967
Because of my online fan base.
291
00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:05,922
Would you mind showing that to me?
292
00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:07,121
Here.
293
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:21,410
There. You see that?
294
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:24,769
106 million people.
295
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:30,609
No, see, that number is the number
of people in the entire network.
296
00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:36,369
Actually, only 119 people
have seen your page.
297
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:37,931
- What?
- See?
298
00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:47,089
Marco, there's a lot of things
to figure out.
299
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,209
Why don't you let me help you?
300
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,727
[CARLA] Carla Lucia to check out.
301
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:56,001
I'm sorry.
302
00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:58,083
You can't be released
until the doctors think you're okay.
303
00:19:58,240 --> 00:19:59,241
- What?
- You can have...
304
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:03,041
No. I signed myself in voluntarily
last night.
305
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,565
- Yes, I know, but...
- You can't keep me here.
306
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:06,330
- ...you're still not allowed to be released...
- No, you can't keep...
307
00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:08,164
- Call my mom. Call her.
- She's on her way.
308
00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,084
Listen. She's on her way
with your clothes.
309
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:31,127
- Good morning, Paul.
- It is a good morning.
310
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,123
You know what would make a really
good morning, though?
311
00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:34,361
What?
312
00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:37,091
You slip some Adderall
into my cup instead of Seroquel,
313
00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:39,641
which is understandable
because it is kind of the same color.
314
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:41,922
You know, especially
with pre-coffee eyesight?
315
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:44,162
None of those cameras
are gonna see anything.
316
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:46,163
And you don't have manic eyes,
know what I mean?
317
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,483
Oh, yeah. I think the last thing
you need is Adderall.
318
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:54,009
- Okay. Think about it.
- And, down.
319
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:57,607
- Think about it for lunchtime.
- No. Let me see. Let's see.
320
00:20:57,760 --> 00:20:59,444
Thank you.
321
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:04,123
This is the idea of the apocalypse,
is a new beginning.
322
00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:05,845
- Gary.
- Yes, but you don't understand...
323
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,002
- What?
- I'm graduating you.
324
00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:10,168
What? That's great.
325
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:11,481
How did...
326
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,564
- That's... Hey, thanks, man.
- Hey.
327
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:17,200
I'm just trying to tell you
what I see in the cards.
328
00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:19,283
Are we the first people to tell you
that you're gonna die?
329
00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:20,805
- No, but the fact that...
- I'm really sorry to be
330
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,803
- the bearer of bad news.
- You're scaring him. Please stop.
331
00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:24,485
You don't have to shoot
the messenger here.
332
00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:26,768
Let's play some strip poker!
333
00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:29,161
[LAUGHTER]
334
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,051
[MAN] All right, guys.
335
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:36,250
We have two new people joining us today,
Emily and Marco.
336
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:37,566
I go by Luna.
337
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:39,850
Okay. This your nickname?
338
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,047
It's my poet's name.
339
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,646
Okay. Great.
340
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:47,243
So, how's everyone feeling?
341
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,250
All right, Gary,
why don't we start with you.
342
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:53,448
What's on your mind this morning?
343
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,209
The apocalypse.
344
00:21:56,360 --> 00:21:57,361
Okay.
345
00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:02,128
Do those sound
like rational or irrational fears?
346
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:03,566
Anyone?
347
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,165
Irrational.
348
00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:07,163
All right, Luna,
349
00:22:07,320 --> 00:22:10,529
tell Gary why his fears are irrational.
350
00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:12,720
Gary...
351
00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:19,202
you don't need to be
afraid of the apocalypse
352
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:20,811
because...
353
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:24,611
it's gonna happen, no matter what.
354
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:26,603
In fact, it's already happening.
355
00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:29,047
- [MAN] Luna.
- What?
356
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:30,526
The world's not going to end.
357
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:33,524
Maybe not the world,
but the human race is.
358
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:36,604
Gary, don't worry.
The human race isn't going to end.
359
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:37,886
Of course it is.
360
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:39,161
What, you think it's a coincidence
361
00:22:39,320 --> 00:22:42,483
that Nostradamus
and the Mayans both predicted that?
362
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:45,086
No. They saw where the planet was going.
363
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:47,481
They saw everyone around
them cutting down more and more trees.
364
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:50,211
They saw humanity becoming a disease.
365
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,203
Do you know what
the definition of a disease is?
366
00:22:52,360 --> 00:22:55,125
It's when a single organism
becomes so overgrown
367
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:56,611
that it's a menace to the whole.
368
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,366
And do you know what happens
when a disease threatens
369
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:01,722
the overall holistic balance in Nature?
370
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:03,211
It develops antibodies.
371
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,850
Okay, we're descending into some place
that we don't really need to go right now.
372
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,331
[MARCO] I didn't mean anything by it.
373
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,005
Well, you're upsetting Gary.
374
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:13,204
Well, maybe now, but don't you think
that it's better in the long run
375
00:23:13,360 --> 00:23:15,727
- for him to know the truth?
- It's not the truth.
376
00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:19,771
Why don't you just apologize
to Gary for upsetting him?
377
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:27,047
Gary, I'm sorry that I upset you.
378
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:29,726
I didn't mean to scare you.
379
00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:31,689
There's nothing to be upset about
380
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:36,243
because just think of it
like ridding the earth of a disease.
381
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:37,640
Don't you want that?
382
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:41,804
Don't you think that's a little selfish?
383
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:43,325
- Luna.
- What?
384
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:46,126
You were doing great.
You were doing great.
385
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:47,765
Maybe you went a little far.
386
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:50,366
How did I go...
That's why I'm apologizing.
387
00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:52,010
Okay, we're just trying to keep it simple.
388
00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:54,521
- That's why I'm apologizing.
- Yeah, just a simple apology.
389
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:57,729
- You'll never graduate this way, Luna.
- What are you talking about?
390
00:23:57,880 --> 00:23:59,928
Yeah.
391
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:02,683
- What is that?
- Those are the marks.
392
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:05,969
There's still some more to learn,
I guess, isn't there?
393
00:24:06,120 --> 00:24:07,167
His thoughts are fine.
394
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,129
Let's just imagine ourselves,
for a minute...
395
00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:10,281
I think it's okay to...
396
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:14,126
- Everybody here knows how to share.
- Could you please just stop?
397
00:24:15,360 --> 00:24:17,089
You have an opinion
on what's being said here?
398
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:23,125
It's your first day here, and you're
alienating yourself from the entire group.
399
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:25,521
Are you saying
that I should hide what I think
400
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:27,648
in order to become part of a group?
401
00:24:30,480 --> 00:24:31,481
No.
402
00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:35,881
Why are you looking at the group?
403
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,361
- I'm not!
- Yeah, you are.
404
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:39,521
Why are you lying?
405
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:41,011
- I'm not lying!
- Why are you lying?
406
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:42,366
- I'm not lying.
- Why are you lying?
407
00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:44,363
And it seems we've reached an impasse.
408
00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:47,569
And we'll just take a couple of minutes
to cool down, three minutes,
409
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:50,121
and we'll come back to the circle. Okay?
410
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:51,964
It's all right. No touching, please.
411
00:24:58,640 --> 00:25:02,281
- Luna, why don't you color?
- Because I'm uninspired.
412
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,681
Okay, why don't you take a look
at the books on the shelf.
413
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,683
Maybe they'll give you some inspiration.
414
00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:13,723
Here we go.
415
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:15,120
Van Gogh.
416
00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:17,288
Top member of the Bipolar Club.
417
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:21,926
You see this?
418
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:23,610
- Yes, it's beautiful.
- Yeah, that's right.
419
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:25,569
- You know why?
- Why?
420
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:28,200
Because it's the painting
of the sky he saw
421
00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:31,204
from his sanitarium window
while he was manic.
422
00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:33,044
- Really?
- Yeah.
423
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:34,804
You don't believe me? Go look it up.
424
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:35,961
I believe you.
425
00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:37,724
Well, when you go out tonight,
426
00:25:37,880 --> 00:25:40,247
and you look at the sky
and you see how dull it is,
427
00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:42,687
think about if you
would've medicated Van Gogh.
428
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:51,401
Luna.
429
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:53,289
What kind of poetry do you do?
430
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:54,601
Rap.
431
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,091
- You rap?
- Yeah.
432
00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:59,170
When I first went manic,
I just started rhyming compulsively,
433
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,085
but, you know,
that's a textbook manic symptom.
434
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:04,720
- Really?
- Yeah.
435
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,008
You don't believe me? Go look it up.
436
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:09,686
Can you show us some?
437
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:12,571
Give me a word.
438
00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:14,606
[CARLA] Anti-Christ.
439
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:22,329
I fancy the delight...
440
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,364
of what it might be like
441
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:28,847
to be thought of as the Anti-Christ.
442
00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,170
Anti-body to humanity.
443
00:26:32,360 --> 00:26:34,203
Because, God damn it,
444
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:36,562
if you handed me the planet,
445
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:39,121
I'd give it such an apocalyptic rinse
446
00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,971
- that would rid it of these lice.
- How about shameless?
447
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:47,008
I'm so shameless,
448
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:49,527
I have no chains of shame to restrain
449
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:51,921
what I do or say or think,
450
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:54,970
afraid that people might be ashamed of it.
451
00:26:55,120 --> 00:26:56,326
Alone.
452
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:02,401
I may be alone,
453
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:05,370
but at least I don't feel alone
454
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:07,130
with the closest people I know
455
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,931
because I changed myself
into something fake
456
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:11,730
to gain the group's praise
457
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:13,723
till I don't even know my own soul,
458
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:14,961
which, if you ask me,
459
00:27:15,120 --> 00:27:17,441
is the loneliest state of being alone.
460
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:27,686
Is that it?
461
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,521
No more words?
462
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,763
I see, you'd rather read that?
What is that, real poetry?
463
00:27:34,960 --> 00:27:36,166
[LAUGHS]
464
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:37,321
Let's see.
465
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:39,448
- Hey. Hey.
- Luna.
466
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:42,251
"The sun shined as bright
as its flame could blaze..."
467
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:43,481
- I'm getting the doctor!
- Okay! Okay!
468
00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:44,920
Oh! Oh-oh!
469
00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:47,970
- "Trying so hard each day to reach down..."
- Would you stop it!
470
00:27:48,120 --> 00:27:50,122
- "and touch each face."
- Stop it!
471
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:54,649
"But they all turned away,
bitterly squinting, wincing,
472
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:57,610
so no matter how much it reached out
to the human race,
473
00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:01,526
it knew it would always be estranged."
474
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:42,644
We are all bipolar.
Sometimes it's like a molar.
475
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:45,371
You wanna take it out,
you want to be better.
476
00:28:45,520 --> 00:28:47,045
So, don't sweat the weather.
477
00:28:47,240 --> 00:28:48,526
Check out the solar power.
478
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:49,806
It's the rhyming hour.
479
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:52,770
The first card is the symbol cradle.
480
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,281
Don't worry, it's the symbol of life,
nothing fatal.
481
00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:58,649
I'm gonna strap you down and stick
one of these nurses' syringes into you.
482
00:28:58,840 --> 00:28:59,921
That doesn't rhyme.
483
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:03,402
[MARCO] Don't even stop to think about it.
Just let it all go. You be the vessel.
484
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:05,130
Okay, that's where
the best stuff just happens.
485
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:07,044
Just let it in and spit it out.
486
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:09,407
But good, though.
487
00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:11,568
- You graduated, Luna.
- What?
488
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:13,603
[LAUGHTER]
489
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:17,481
[CHEERING]
490
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,649
[MALE PATIENT]
You're one level higher. Yeah.
491
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:31,531
- Couldn't sleep?
- No.
492
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:34,729
- Want something to help?
- No, I'm just gonna go to the art room.
493
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:09,086
Can't sleep?
494
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:12,401
No.
495
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,204
So Emily,
496
00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:36,045
can I ask you what your full fake name is?
497
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,002
Emily Lowell.
498
00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:43,481
Is that Emily Dickinson and Robert Lowell?
499
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:49,088
Those are good poets.
500
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:53,131
Do you know they were both bipolar?
501
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:56,807
You think every great artist was bipolar.
502
00:30:58,160 --> 00:30:59,650
It's fine if it helps you.
503
00:31:01,400 --> 00:31:03,482
"We of the craft are all crazy..."
504
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:09,722
"Some are affected by gaiety,
others with melancholy.
505
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,403
But all are more or less touched."
506
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:16,886
You know who said that?
507
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:21,124
Lord Byron.
508
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:26,571
One of the greatest
manic-depressive poets of all time.
509
00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:34,324
It's in the opening to this book,
Touched with Fire by Kay Jamison.
510
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:37,131
She's a psychologist,
511
00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:42,161
and when she was first starting out,
512
00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:47,850
she, out of nowhere,
had this manic episode.
513
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:50,571
It scared her.
514
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:53,286
So she tried to keep it a secret.
515
00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:58,727
But then... something changed.
516
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:02,205
She decided to write books about it.
517
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:05,762
She did all this research, and she found
all these crazy connections
518
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:09,083
between bipolar and artistic genius
519
00:32:09,280 --> 00:32:12,443
all through history, all over the world.
520
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:15,251
Instead of being ashamed of it...
521
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:21,684
she made it a gift.
522
00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:26,531
You know, when people go
to see The Nutcracker...
523
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:31,005
and they look over at their kids
and they see their eyes light up
524
00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:34,960
when the world turns to magic at night...
525
00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:40,126
they'll know that the music
that Tchaikovsky composed
526
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:44,808
was enriched by his bipolar,
and not think of it as just a disease.
527
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,004
[WOMAN] When I look at the river, I mean,
528
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:53,367
that's a symbol for two things
coming together.
529
00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:57,411
That could be the end of a journey,
or two people.
530
00:32:58,560 --> 00:32:59,607
Anything else?
531
00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:02,286
Well, I mean, you can have more
if you want more.
532
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:03,680
There's a house. [CHUCKLES]
533
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:05,808
[MUTTERING]
534
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:08,241
Yeah, Luna, I just told Emily's fortune.
535
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:10,243
Huh?
536
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,448
- Come on, I want to hear yours.
- [MAN] Put 'em together.
537
00:33:12,600 --> 00:33:14,045
- Take a seat.
- What?
538
00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:15,929
[CARLA] She wants to read your cards.
539
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:23,202
[WOMAN] She got a moon. [LAUGHS]
540
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:25,010
You got a moon?
541
00:33:26,280 --> 00:33:27,566
That's interesting.
542
00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:30,722
[WOMAN] She got two rivers meeting.
543
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:33,525
Why is it interesting?
544
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:38,967
You know that we're made up
of mostly water?
545
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:41,083
And the moon pulls water.
546
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:44,562
Well, that's just the sun that does that.
I just reflect it.
547
00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:46,609
[GARY] But when the sun's down,
we see the moon.
548
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:47,761
That's the light.
549
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:50,088
That's true, but that's just
the light from the sun
550
00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:53,244
hitting the moon, shining back.
551
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:16,880
Couldn't sleep again?
552
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:18,041
No.
553
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:22,201
Well, that's weird.
554
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:24,567
It's the same time as last night.
555
00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:27,089
Must be something to do with the moon.
556
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,123
Why did you name yourself Luna?
557
00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:34,530
Because the lunatic looks
to the moon as if asking it
558
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:36,330
how he got stuck down here.
559
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:42,328
[CARLA] Where are you from?
560
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:46,371
Yeah, I know you're from the moon,
but what about your parents?
561
00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:48,881
[MARCO] My father's from here.
562
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:51,281
My mother's from where I'm from.
563
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:53,323
She used to wake me
in the middle of the night
564
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:55,608
and take me out to look at the stars.
565
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:59,367
Imagine jumping from star to star to star.
566
00:35:01,240 --> 00:35:02,480
And your dad?
567
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,368
He falls with most dads.
568
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:11,765
They don't like to see their girls...
struggle.
569
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:13,166
So...
570
00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:17,961
I don't see him much.
571
00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:21,806
I guess... I guess I make him sad.
572
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:28,524
We're not from here, you and me.
573
00:35:31,160 --> 00:35:32,491
Feels like that.
574
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:35,606
[CARLA] How'd you get stuck here?
575
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:38,286
It's embarrassing.
576
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:45,323
- Tell you, if you tell me.
- Okay, you tell me first.
577
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:47,047
Okay.
578
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:51,330
You forced your eyes opened,
and stared into the sun.
579
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:53,050
Is that what triggered it?
580
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:55,646
You know what?
581
00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:58,002
We're both really exhausted.
582
00:35:58,160 --> 00:36:00,003
I know I am.
583
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,925
There's no way that we're going
to get through all this tonight.
584
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:08,045
You should spend the night,
and first thing in the morning,
585
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:10,487
we'll go over all of this in detail.
586
00:36:10,640 --> 00:36:13,405
Sign this and check yourself in,
587
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:18,122
and we will do a thorough
examination of your case
588
00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:20,084
first thing in the morning.
589
00:36:20,280 --> 00:36:22,601
You accidentally checked yourself
into a mental institution?
590
00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:23,886
- Just for one night.
- No.
591
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:25,724
For one night.
592
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:28,645
[LAUGHING]
593
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:33,123
- It's not that funny.
- It's stupid. [LAUGHING]
594
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:35,362
Okay.
595
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:37,010
Now it's your turn.
596
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,846
I climbed to the top of a building.
597
00:36:50,720 --> 00:36:52,210
I looked up to the moon...
598
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:56,248
asking it to take me home.
599
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:04,521
And all of a sudden...
600
00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:10,202
I felt this light shining on my face.
601
00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,564
And I thought, "My God.
602
00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:17,645
It's working.
603
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:22,966
I get to go home."
604
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:27,204
And...
605
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:49,407
Know what?
606
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:52,931
You know, maybe...
607
00:37:57,680 --> 00:38:00,923
Maybe you're right.
608
00:38:05,240 --> 00:38:08,164
I mean, maybe we are aliens.
609
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:10,685
You, too?
610
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:13,126
Maybe.
611
00:38:21,240 --> 00:38:25,131
Lunatic mind ticks in sync
with lunar time.
612
00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:28,802
The more the moon pulls the tides,
the more it lifts our minds,
613
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:30,803
and the more the sunlight
shines on the moon,
614
00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:32,405
the more manic we become.
615
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:54,481
This is a normal brain,
lit up just in a few places.
616
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:59,129
But this, this is a manic brain,
fully lit.
617
00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:00,964
That's what you call illumination.
618
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:05,325
- [MARCO] It's the sages.
- [CARLA] I know.
619
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:09,246
It's the prophets through the ages
who know about the gods.
620
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:12,722
The prophets, when they were manic,
that was when
621
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:15,406
they were almost reaching
full illumination.
622
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:17,289
And that was right before they died.
623
00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:19,090
That's the 13th hour.
That's what you're talking about.
624
00:39:19,240 --> 00:39:20,924
- Right, that's what I'm saying.
- That's illumination.
625
00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:23,003
Look at these pyramids.
626
00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:24,161
They all face the heavens.
627
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:27,608
This is intricate cosmic mapping,
ways out.
628
00:39:27,800 --> 00:39:29,643
These all have to do with escaping
629
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,286
to somehow getting out
of the body, this flesh...
630
00:39:32,440 --> 00:39:35,683
Well, they did find certain stones,
metals, that absorb energy.
631
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:38,089
And the metals absorb the heavens
632
00:39:38,240 --> 00:39:40,242
reaching up to the tip
of the pyramid to the sun,
633
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:41,965
inviting its light in.
634
00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:54,962
Yes, yeah, put it in.
635
00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:57,441
Silverware, silverware.
636
00:39:57,600 --> 00:39:59,489
Yeah, we need a transmitter.
637
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:03,001
- These are for the antenna?
- Yeah.
638
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:04,969
They'll get out, yeah.
639
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:14,965
That's not gonna work. What can we use?
640
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:19,530
Use this.
641
00:40:19,680 --> 00:40:21,011
Stick it in there.
642
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:23,049
I don't know if these things
are strong enough.
643
00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:24,720
There are four sides to each pyramid.
644
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:26,564
This is a view from...
of the third pyramid.
645
00:40:26,720 --> 00:40:28,210
The three pyramids,
four sides to each one.
646
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:30,129
There is 12.
647
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:31,845
- 12 months.
- 2012.
648
00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:34,162
- 12 hours.
- 12 apostles.
649
00:40:36,960 --> 00:40:42,490
Dr. Strinsky doesn't want you two
coming out at night anymore.
650
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:44,964
So...
651
00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:57,331
Could I have something to help me sleep?
652
00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:28,442
No reaction. You know what?
653
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:31,206
The more down-to-earth they are,
the deeper they sleep.
654
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:33,203
Okay. Don't wait, then.
655
00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:04,487
[MUTTERING]
656
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:07,803
- Okay, no. Yeah.
- I'm going to stretch that over.
657
00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:24,009
What if our souls get lost?
658
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:25,525
They won't.
659
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,727
We'll keep each other oriented.
660
00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:35,730
What if we lose each other?
661
00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:40,884
If we lose each other,
then we come back to our bodies.
662
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:43,930
Okay, we come back to our bodies,
and we remember this.
663
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:46,122
We remember this map. Okay?
664
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:48,203
And we remember it's in this book.
665
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:51,250
And it'll be on this page, all right?
666
00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:02,322
And it'll be right here
in the top right corner.
667
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:03,811
Okay?
668
00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:11,566
Are you ready?
669
00:43:16,120 --> 00:43:17,531
Yeah.
670
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:41,885
The nurses tell me you two have
continued to stay up at night together
671
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,008
even after I instructed you not to.
672
00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:47,446
First reports say you
stayed up until 4:00 A.M.
673
00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:50,723
And the more recent reports
say you haven't slept at all.
674
00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:53,929
So, we're going to move you,
Marco, to a different ward.
675
00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:56,082
- Why?
- Because you have a bad influence...
676
00:43:56,240 --> 00:43:57,605
- But, why?
- No, we don't.
677
00:43:57,760 --> 00:43:59,922
Is it true that neither of you
thinks you're from this planet?
678
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,401
Because we're not from this planet.
679
00:44:02,560 --> 00:44:04,881
Okay, sit. Where do you think you're from?
680
00:44:05,040 --> 00:44:08,522
- Would someone from your planet do this?
- Marco. Sit down.
681
00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:11,047
- You know what? You can't separate...
- Would someone from your planet do that?
682
00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:12,804
That's not fair.
683
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:15,048
- Would they?
- [CARLA] Fuck you!
684
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:16,406
- Don't you go near her.
- N-N-No!
685
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:17,607
Marco! Marco!
686
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:19,450
- Fuck you!
- No, Marco! No!
687
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:24,209
No! No!
688
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:27,125
- Get them off!
- No, you motherfucker!
689
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:31,643
[SCREAMING]
690
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:39,121
- [SCREAMING]
- Hold her...
691
00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:45,285
[CARLA GROANING]
692
00:44:57,560 --> 00:44:59,085
[MUFFLED] No!
693
00:44:59,240 --> 00:45:00,844
No!
694
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:09,767
Let us go home!
695
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,810
Please, let us go home!
696
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:14,880
We just want to go home.
697
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:28,369
[GEORGE] Why is he so sedated?
698
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:33,561
[DR. STRINSKY] He was with a female
patient, and they made each other manic.
699
00:45:33,720 --> 00:45:37,406
We separated them and they
became even more manic.
700
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:41,009
How long is he going to be like that?
701
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:44,887
It's not just the medication.
702
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:50,046
Because the mania got so
out of control and he went so high,
703
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,249
he's going to go just as low
with the depression.
704
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:56,170
It's going to be severe.
705
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:59,570
It'll be about six months.
706
00:45:59,720 --> 00:46:03,884
We would keep him here,
but the hospital just can't afford it.
707
00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:07,566
I suggest that he live with you
for a while.
708
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:10,764
[EXHALES]
709
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:24,121
[SIGHS]
710
00:47:30,280 --> 00:47:34,968
[LIGHT BREATHING]
711
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:01,844
[GEORGE] Wake up. Made you dinner.
712
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:06,091
Taken a shower?
713
00:48:22,600 --> 00:48:26,685
[SCRAPING GROWS LOUDER]
714
00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:33,001
[SARA] Just take a bath?
715
00:48:34,280 --> 00:48:35,327
[CARLA] Yeah.
716
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:38,131
Didn't you take one, like, four hours ago?
717
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:40,565
It's the same one.
718
00:48:40,720 --> 00:48:43,451
You've been in the tub for four hours?
719
00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:46,931
It comforts me.
720
00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:36,921
[GEORGE] Oh.
721
00:49:38,120 --> 00:49:39,485
I didn't see you there.
722
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:42,686
How you feelin'?
723
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:44,766
Same.
724
00:50:34,120 --> 00:50:36,088
Meet me on the other side.
725
00:52:32,520 --> 00:52:33,931
[CARLA] What if we lose each other?
726
00:52:35,040 --> 00:52:37,805
[MARCO] If we lose each other,
then we come back to our bodies.
727
00:52:37,960 --> 00:52:40,930
Okay, we come back to our bodies,
and we remember this.
728
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:42,889
We remember this map, okay?
729
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:12,968
[CHATTERING]
730
00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:17,969
Yo, yo, I got another joke.
I got another joke.
731
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:23,805
[MARCO] I was a patient here,
back in the fall.
732
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:26,122
There was this girl who was in my ward.
733
00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:28,169
I don't have her contact information.
734
00:53:28,320 --> 00:53:31,688
Yeah, we can't give out
patient's information,
735
00:53:31,840 --> 00:53:33,968
for confidentiality reasons.
736
00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:37,290
Is Dr. Strinsky here?
737
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:40,885
[DR. STRINSKY] Hey, Carla.
738
00:53:42,080 --> 00:53:43,570
Hey.
739
00:53:47,440 --> 00:53:50,842
Listen, I know it's hospital policy
740
00:53:51,040 --> 00:53:53,122
not to give out patient's information,
741
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:55,726
but if you hadn't torn us apart,
742
00:53:55,920 --> 00:53:57,809
we would've exchanged information.
743
00:53:59,640 --> 00:54:04,009
I'm sorry, but no matter what,
it's out of my hands.
744
00:54:11,240 --> 00:54:13,607
Will you at least tell me
if he came looking for me?
745
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:18,209
No, he didn't.
746
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:20,805
Marco.
747
00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:23,964
I already told you,
I'm not giving you her information.
748
00:54:24,120 --> 00:54:26,327
Okay. Can you just give her this,
if she comes in?
749
00:54:26,480 --> 00:54:27,925
Let me see.
750
00:54:41,840 --> 00:54:43,649
I'm sorry.
I'm not going to give this to her.
751
00:54:43,840 --> 00:54:45,604
But that's not personal information.
752
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:47,689
That's not against hospital policy.
753
00:54:47,840 --> 00:54:50,127
It's not just policy, Marco.
754
00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:53,210
You two made each other manic
when you were together in the hospital.
755
00:54:53,360 --> 00:54:55,727
It's my professional opinion
756
00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:57,689
that you're not healthy for one another.
757
00:54:57,840 --> 00:55:01,811
Have a seat.
I'll tell Dr. Strinsky that you're back.
758
00:56:02,120 --> 00:56:04,726
What did you think...
759
00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:06,649
seeing it up close?
760
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:08,763
I thought it was...
761
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:10,001
It was cool.
762
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:12,531
What did you think?
763
00:56:14,720 --> 00:56:16,006
I thought it was nice.
764
00:56:20,960 --> 00:56:22,689
You didn't like it, did you?
765
00:56:24,240 --> 00:56:26,208
I guess I just...
766
00:56:27,120 --> 00:56:28,690
It wasn't...
767
00:56:39,120 --> 00:56:41,964
Do you remember what this looked like
when we were in the hospital?
768
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:46,648
[DR. LYONS]
You've just come out of the depression.
769
00:57:46,800 --> 00:57:51,283
You haven't been in a physical relationship
for quite a while.
770
00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:53,522
- It's understandable.
- No, it's not just that.
771
00:57:53,680 --> 00:57:57,446
I don't feel the emotion
that I should feel for her.
772
00:57:57,600 --> 00:58:01,207
Well, you won't have the passion you had
when you were manic.
773
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:04,364
You're going to have to learn to live
within a normal range of emotions.
774
00:58:04,520 --> 00:58:06,568
This isn't a normal range.
775
00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:09,609
I don't feel anything.
776
00:58:11,000 --> 00:58:15,847
You've lived in emotional extremes
for so long,
777
00:58:16,000 --> 00:58:18,401
you've no way of knowing
what normal feels like.
778
00:58:19,520 --> 00:58:22,000
And it's going to take you
some time to learn.
779
00:58:24,160 --> 00:58:25,764
[CARLA] Okay. Okay.
780
00:58:30,480 --> 00:58:32,369
I've been calling. Why didn't you pick up?
781
00:58:32,520 --> 00:58:34,010
I'm sorry...
782
00:58:34,160 --> 00:58:36,367
You know, I'm still not comfortable
with you living on your own.
783
00:58:36,520 --> 00:58:37,760
So that might worry me a little bit.
784
00:58:37,920 --> 00:58:39,251
- Mom...
- What, you're...
785
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:41,402
Do you think maybe I could come
and visit you tomorrow?
786
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:42,971
You're not going to let me come in?
787
00:58:43,160 --> 00:58:45,049
Well, I'm just... Well, I'm...
788
00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:46,531
- You know how...
- Please, sweetie, I just...
789
00:58:46,680 --> 00:58:49,286
just let me in
or I'm not going to sleep tonight.
790
00:58:51,600 --> 00:58:53,329
- Mom...
- Oh.
791
00:58:53,480 --> 00:58:55,642
- Hello.
- Hello.
792
00:58:55,840 --> 00:58:57,410
Who's that?
793
00:58:58,400 --> 00:58:59,731
Come on in.
794
00:59:01,840 --> 00:59:04,446
Marco, this is my mom.
795
00:59:04,640 --> 00:59:05,801
- Hello.
- Mom, this is Marco.
796
00:59:05,960 --> 00:59:07,291
Hello.
797
00:59:07,480 --> 00:59:09,562
- Wow. Very nice to meet you.
- Hi.
798
00:59:09,720 --> 00:59:10,960
Nice to meet you.
799
00:59:12,080 --> 00:59:15,004
We were just reading Touched with Fire.
800
00:59:15,160 --> 00:59:17,288
- It's a great book. Do you know it?
- No.
801
00:59:17,440 --> 00:59:18,965
Really? Carla never told you about it?
802
00:59:19,120 --> 00:59:22,203
No. So how do you two know each other?
803
00:59:22,360 --> 00:59:23,964
- Oh...
- He's a poet.
804
00:59:27,840 --> 00:59:29,251
Um...
805
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:31,650
I'm hungry.
806
00:59:31,800 --> 00:59:33,609
Do you guys want to go get some food?
807
00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:35,967
- I'd love that.
- Great.
808
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:37,531
I'm not really hungry.
809
00:59:37,680 --> 00:59:39,170
Well, at least come along
for the conversation.
810
00:59:39,320 --> 00:59:40,401
You don't have to eat.
811
00:59:40,560 --> 00:59:43,131
If anything, your mouth
will be more free to talk.
812
00:59:43,280 --> 00:59:44,520
Do you like spicy food?
813
00:59:44,720 --> 00:59:47,963
I don't know. Maybe.
814
00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:50,521
- I know this place that has a really...
- You know, I'm tired.
815
00:59:50,680 --> 00:59:53,081
Oh, really? Why do you think you're tired?
816
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:55,208
I kinda just want to stay in.
817
00:59:55,400 --> 00:59:58,165
Okay. Well, maybe
we could pick up something
818
00:59:58,360 --> 00:59:59,521
for you and bring it back.
819
00:59:59,680 --> 01:00:02,365
No, I just... I'll come back
another time if you're tired.
820
01:00:02,520 --> 01:00:04,284
Are you ashamed of me?
821
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:06,010
- What?
- Are you ashamed of me?
822
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:08,089
No. What are you talking about?
823
01:00:08,240 --> 01:00:09,605
Why didn't you tell her?
824
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:13,965
I don't know.
825
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:22,881
I guess I'm just afraid of...
of them tearing us apart.
826
01:00:23,040 --> 01:00:24,883
They can't tear us apart.
827
01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:30,524
We have to tell them.
828
01:00:33,240 --> 01:00:34,321
Okay.
829
01:00:34,520 --> 01:00:36,488
So, I just...
830
01:00:36,640 --> 01:00:40,122
I want to orient myself,
if you don't mind.
831
01:00:40,320 --> 01:00:44,803
My wife, you know, Sara,
had updated me a little
832
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:46,803
on the background of the situation.
833
01:00:46,960 --> 01:00:50,760
You met Carla in the hospital?
834
01:00:50,920 --> 01:00:56,051
- That's right.
- We met in, well, group therapy.
835
01:00:56,200 --> 01:00:59,363
They... We have to do
group therapy every day.
836
01:00:59,520 --> 01:01:01,568
That's nice that you were able
to connect in that environment.
837
01:01:01,760 --> 01:01:03,046
[MARCO] Yeah, absolutely.
838
01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:05,965
And, but right...
839
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:10,364
This was right before you both went manic.
840
01:01:13,320 --> 01:01:16,005
When you have this illness, you...
841
01:01:16,160 --> 01:01:19,369
actually go manic
before you go into the hospital, Dad.
842
01:01:19,520 --> 01:01:21,522
Oh, of course. Well, that's true.
843
01:01:21,680 --> 01:01:24,286
I'm sorry. No, I meant the...
but right after you met,
844
01:01:24,440 --> 01:01:26,488
then what would we say,
you went more manic.
845
01:01:26,640 --> 01:01:28,483
- More.
- It did increase, is it...
846
01:01:28,640 --> 01:01:31,371
Well, we brought out each other's nature,
if that's what you're driving at.
847
01:01:31,520 --> 01:01:33,522
- So you...
- I guess that's one way of putting it...
848
01:01:33,680 --> 01:01:36,763
You admit that you
bring out each other's illness, right?
849
01:01:36,960 --> 01:01:41,443
No, I'm saying that it's our nature
to feel things more deeply
850
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:43,204
than what's considered normal.
851
01:01:43,360 --> 01:01:44,805
And not... That's really not what...
852
01:01:44,960 --> 01:01:48,407
I understand it,
that it's sort of not a norm.
853
01:01:48,600 --> 01:01:50,011
I understand that it's an illness...
854
01:01:50,160 --> 01:01:52,891
I don't think
we should get caught up, if I may,
855
01:01:53,040 --> 01:01:55,725
just on whether it's a disease
or nature or something.
856
01:01:55,880 --> 01:01:57,962
I think the point is,
and the reason we're here,
857
01:01:58,120 --> 01:02:00,805
is, you both have it,
858
01:02:00,960 --> 01:02:04,043
and I guess we're just concerned
859
01:02:04,240 --> 01:02:06,208
that you might be
a bad influence on each other.
860
01:02:06,360 --> 01:02:07,407
That's it.
861
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:10,211
Well, but because we both share it,
862
01:02:10,360 --> 01:02:13,330
we're the only ones
that can relate to each other.
863
01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:15,289
It's beautiful.
864
01:02:15,440 --> 01:02:17,010
Well, I understand that.
865
01:02:17,160 --> 01:02:18,730
Excuse me, but you understand that?
866
01:02:18,920 --> 01:02:20,729
The doct... remember, the doctors told us?
867
01:02:20,920 --> 01:02:23,161
I mean, let's face it.
868
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:25,846
You know, if they signed up
for a dating website,
869
01:02:26,000 --> 01:02:27,445
you know,
and they put down "mentally ill,"
870
01:02:27,600 --> 01:02:30,001
it's not like they're going to attract
a whole lot of people saying,
871
01:02:30,160 --> 01:02:32,481
"Oh, that's my soul mate." Right?
872
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:37,242
Maybe this is a chance
for them to have a real relationship.
873
01:02:37,440 --> 01:02:40,603
You know, and if they stay
on the medication,
874
01:02:40,760 --> 01:02:42,205
quite frankly, I got no problem with that.
875
01:02:42,400 --> 01:02:43,686
But that's the whole issue, right?
876
01:02:43,840 --> 01:02:45,569
Mom, can you just listen to him?
877
01:02:45,720 --> 01:02:47,404
- We can't take the meds.
- Mom, just... just listen...
878
01:02:47,560 --> 01:02:49,801
Okay, well, just as I thought.
879
01:02:49,960 --> 01:02:51,724
- What are you talking about?
- You know what I'm talking about.
880
01:02:51,880 --> 01:02:55,168
Marco, listen.
You know that it's going to take time
881
01:02:55,320 --> 01:02:57,721
till you find the right dosage, right?
882
01:02:57,880 --> 01:02:59,564
Even the doctor, the doctor has said
883
01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:02,644
that eventually you are going to feel
884
01:03:02,840 --> 01:03:04,569
the wide range of normal emotions.
885
01:03:04,720 --> 01:03:06,609
And how does he know?
He's not taking the meds.
886
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:08,802
The doctor does not take the meds,
and you know that.
887
01:03:08,960 --> 01:03:10,530
So, then I can't just trust him.
888
01:03:10,720 --> 01:03:13,610
I don't think it's such a bad thing
889
01:03:13,760 --> 01:03:17,082
to feel life with the deepest emotion.
890
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:19,891
- I don't think that's a problem.
- It's an illness.
891
01:03:20,040 --> 01:03:23,164
Well, maybe for you, because maybe
you have a low emotional capacity,
892
01:03:23,360 --> 01:03:25,203
and so to you, it makes you feel sick.
893
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:26,970
No, I don't have... Wait a minute.
894
01:03:27,120 --> 01:03:29,361
- I don't have a low emotional capacity.
- Wait, it's not an attack.
895
01:03:29,520 --> 01:03:31,204
- I feel things just fine.
- I'm sorry. I understand.
896
01:03:31,360 --> 01:03:33,522
- Mom, you don't have to get upset.
- I don't... My only question...
897
01:03:33,680 --> 01:03:35,364
Well, how dare he say that.
898
01:03:35,520 --> 01:03:38,524
- Okay, as an example, if you...
- He's just talking.
899
01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:40,842
...Iike, how many hours do you spend
a week with your husband?
900
01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:42,530
- Oh, my God.
- This is really not gonna...
901
01:03:42,680 --> 01:03:43,841
this is not about us, again.
902
01:03:44,000 --> 01:03:47,049
- As many hours as any married...
- I'd like to answer that.
903
01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:49,043
- Okay.
- We spend many hours a week together.
904
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:51,407
I would spend every waking moment
905
01:03:51,560 --> 01:03:52,561
- with your daughter.
- Okay. I...
906
01:03:52,760 --> 01:03:56,048
So you mean, insanity is love,
907
01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:59,522
that you have to be crazy to be in love?
Is that what you're saying?
908
01:03:59,680 --> 01:04:02,604
That's not what I'm saying.
You don't understand, Dad.
909
01:04:02,760 --> 01:04:05,001
I understand more than you know.
910
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:09,370
And if you think that there's
any romance in being crazy,
911
01:04:09,520 --> 01:04:11,090
you're crazy.
912
01:04:11,280 --> 01:04:14,807
No, if you understood,
then Mom wouldn't have left.
913
01:04:18,480 --> 01:04:21,404
Your mother,
she left because she was sick.
914
01:04:21,560 --> 01:04:24,769
She left because you thought she was sick,
915
01:04:24,960 --> 01:04:26,962
because she was wild.
916
01:04:27,120 --> 01:04:31,569
And you were tame,
and you wanted to tame her, Dad.
917
01:04:31,760 --> 01:04:33,842
- So where is her love now?
- Dad.
918
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:35,047
No, really, where is it?
919
01:04:35,200 --> 01:04:37,680
When was the last time
you heard from your mother?
920
01:04:40,120 --> 01:04:41,724
- Excuse me.
- Oh, my God.
921
01:04:45,080 --> 01:04:46,684
[DOOR CLOSES]
922
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:50,806
You can't listen to him.
He's wrong. You know that.
923
01:04:50,960 --> 01:04:52,962
This is not a gift. It's an illness.
924
01:04:53,120 --> 01:04:54,884
It needs to be treated.
925
01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:56,371
I've gotten you through so much, honey.
926
01:04:56,520 --> 01:04:59,683
You have to trust me right now
because sometimes your illness
927
01:04:59,840 --> 01:05:02,810
doesn't let you think completely clearly.
But you've gotta believe me.
928
01:05:03,000 --> 01:05:05,128
- Carla, please don't...
- [DONALD] Don't be upset now, come on.
929
01:05:50,640 --> 01:05:52,802
[WATER BUBBLING]
930
01:06:08,520 --> 01:06:11,967
[CARLA] "We awoke from our sleep
and left our sanity beside our bed,
931
01:06:13,160 --> 01:06:16,607
peeled off those sedative sheets...
932
01:06:16,760 --> 01:06:19,491
released our eyelids' grip
on their protective lens...
933
01:06:20,680 --> 01:06:24,366
and let the whole miracle in
against all defense,
934
01:06:24,520 --> 01:06:26,841
past the shattering glass.
935
01:06:35,320 --> 01:06:37,288
God, grant us that view...
936
01:06:38,880 --> 01:06:40,962
and all its blindness due."
937
01:07:07,880 --> 01:07:09,405
What is that?
938
01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:15,089
[LAUGHING]
939
01:08:33,440 --> 01:08:36,046
[BOTH GASPING]
940
01:08:37,320 --> 01:08:40,722
[GROANING]
941
01:09:33,760 --> 01:09:36,923
[CARLA] "A child to rise
from our fiery seeds,
942
01:09:37,080 --> 01:09:41,051
that burned across our bloodlines
for lifetimes, to finally meet."
943
01:09:41,200 --> 01:09:42,929
[MARCO]
"And find a face for the first time
944
01:09:43,080 --> 01:09:46,607
in the reflection between our locked eyes.
945
01:09:46,760 --> 01:09:50,242
"And in their vision,
in a sudden flash of recognition
946
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:52,880
of our place in the Grand Design,
947
01:09:53,080 --> 01:09:56,766
our child will be let
into the gates of creation."
948
01:09:56,960 --> 01:09:59,531
[CARLA] "Touched with both our fires,
949
01:09:59,680 --> 01:10:02,365
to burn twice as high as you and I."
950
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:07,048
Hey, Marco, let's give our baby this book
951
01:10:07,200 --> 01:10:10,204
so that when he starts to know
what he has,
952
01:10:10,360 --> 01:10:12,124
he's gonna know the beauty in it.
953
01:10:13,680 --> 01:10:15,444
[CHOP SAW GRINDING]
954
01:10:15,600 --> 01:10:16,886
Hello!
955
01:10:18,280 --> 01:10:20,408
- Hey, how are you?
- Joe!
956
01:10:20,560 --> 01:10:22,324
Okay, thanks.
957
01:10:22,480 --> 01:10:25,370
Is Marco here? I'm his father.
958
01:10:25,520 --> 01:10:27,841
Oh, no. I haven't seen him in weeks.
959
01:10:28,000 --> 01:10:29,729
- Weeks?
- Yeah.
960
01:10:29,880 --> 01:10:30,961
Okay.
961
01:10:32,320 --> 01:10:36,405
[PHONE RINGING]
962
01:10:45,080 --> 01:10:46,491
I'm going to see what she wants.
963
01:10:50,480 --> 01:10:52,050
Hey, Mom.
964
01:10:53,320 --> 01:10:56,164
Uh, actually, we're busy.
965
01:10:56,320 --> 01:10:58,163
Oh, really, because I would just...
966
01:10:58,320 --> 01:11:00,607
I would love to just get together
with you and Marco
967
01:11:00,760 --> 01:11:03,604
and hear about what you guys are doing.
968
01:11:03,760 --> 01:11:05,569
You know, just clear the air.
969
01:11:09,640 --> 01:11:12,007
- I don't know, Mom...
- Honey, I really...
970
01:11:12,200 --> 01:11:13,804
I really want to work things out. I do.
971
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:16,850
I just... I don't want to
not see you because of this.
972
01:11:18,520 --> 01:11:20,807
You know, I don't want to lose you
for stupid reasons.
973
01:11:21,000 --> 01:11:22,684
Neither do I.
974
01:11:27,240 --> 01:11:28,571
[DOORBELL RINGS]
975
01:11:35,120 --> 01:11:36,770
- Hi, Marco.
- Hello.
976
01:11:36,920 --> 01:11:37,967
- How are you?
- Hi, Marco.
977
01:11:38,120 --> 01:11:39,770
- Good, how are you?
- Good.
978
01:11:39,920 --> 01:11:41,684
- Hi, Marco.
- Hello.
979
01:11:41,840 --> 01:11:43,126
- How you doing?
- Are you guys hungry?
980
01:11:43,280 --> 01:11:44,964
- We have some...
- Oh, you've left the door open.
981
01:11:45,120 --> 01:11:46,770
I'll get that. I'll get that.
It's not important.
982
01:11:46,920 --> 01:11:48,570
- Yeah.
- Wait a minute.
983
01:11:48,720 --> 01:11:50,802
What are you... What's he doing here?
984
01:11:50,960 --> 01:11:53,566
- Oh, we invited him.
- What are you doing here?
985
01:11:53,720 --> 01:11:55,609
- Why? You weren't...
- We love you,
986
01:11:55,760 --> 01:11:57,603
- and we want what's best for you.
- What's going on?
987
01:11:57,760 --> 01:11:58,807
- I brought some people.
- No.
988
01:11:59,000 --> 01:12:00,001
- No! Stop!
- It's fine.
989
01:12:00,160 --> 01:12:02,003
- No, he doesn't get to come in here.
- Calm down.
990
01:12:02,160 --> 01:12:03,730
- It's okay.
- N-N-No. Stop!
991
01:12:03,920 --> 01:12:05,251
He doesn't get to come in here!
992
01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:06,845
Marco, just calm down, okay?
993
01:12:07,000 --> 01:12:09,731
You're a danger to yourself and to others.
994
01:12:09,880 --> 01:12:11,166
You guys need help, okay?
995
01:12:11,320 --> 01:12:13,084
You're off your meds and you're manic.
996
01:12:13,240 --> 01:12:16,084
- You need help.
- No! Fucking, no!
997
01:12:16,240 --> 01:12:17,924
Dad, you fucked me!
998
01:12:18,080 --> 01:12:19,320
You can't fucking do it.
999
01:12:19,520 --> 01:12:22,126
- Your family loves you...
- Dad, I will never fucking forgive you.
1000
01:12:22,280 --> 01:12:23,406
I will never...
1001
01:12:23,560 --> 01:12:25,164
- You fucking sold me down the river.
- I'm sorry.
1002
01:12:25,360 --> 01:12:28,443
...very much. Take a breath, Marco.
1003
01:12:28,600 --> 01:12:30,682
Okay, no, you're right.
1004
01:12:33,480 --> 01:12:35,209
It's okay. All right?
1005
01:12:35,360 --> 01:12:37,886
- Hey.
- We'll go, okay?
1006
01:12:41,760 --> 01:12:43,171
- Hey, sweetie.
- It's really okay.
1007
01:12:43,320 --> 01:12:44,810
- It's going to be fine.
- Don't touch me.
1008
01:12:45,000 --> 01:12:46,286
- No, no, Carla.
- Okay, sweetie, I understand.
1009
01:12:46,440 --> 01:12:48,329
- No! No!
- [CARLA SCREAMS]
1010
01:12:48,480 --> 01:12:49,686
No, don't!
1011
01:12:51,240 --> 01:12:53,129
Fucker!
1012
01:13:18,480 --> 01:13:20,926
[MARCO] We have to go away.
1013
01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:23,691
If they find us,
they'll stop us from having our child.
1014
01:13:24,680 --> 01:13:27,524
They won't want us to bring
a child like us into the world.
1015
01:13:31,560 --> 01:13:33,130
I understand.
1016
01:13:34,560 --> 01:13:37,245
Well, could you let me know
if you hear anything at all?
1017
01:13:37,400 --> 01:13:39,926
Thanks so much. I was really worried.
1018
01:13:46,160 --> 01:13:47,491
This way.
1019
01:13:52,080 --> 01:13:54,447
[CARLA] We should go into the wild
where they can't find us.
1020
01:13:55,960 --> 01:13:58,122
We can raise a child there.
1021
01:13:58,280 --> 01:14:00,806
He won't have to grow up going
through what we went through.
1022
01:14:02,080 --> 01:14:04,481
He'll be free to live
the way he was made to be.
1023
01:14:36,280 --> 01:14:38,442
This is the place.
1024
01:14:38,600 --> 01:14:40,841
This is the place we'll raise our child.
1025
01:14:42,800 --> 01:14:45,121
Everything around him just as wild.
1026
01:15:16,000 --> 01:15:17,081
[CARLA GIGGLING]
1027
01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:20,525
[LAUGHING]
1028
01:15:24,920 --> 01:15:26,524
[YELLS]
1029
01:15:31,240 --> 01:15:32,924
- [SIREN BLARING]
- Oh, shit.
1030
01:15:40,280 --> 01:15:41,725
What are we gonna do?
1031
01:15:45,720 --> 01:15:47,927
- I'm gonna drive in the river.
- What?
1032
01:15:48,960 --> 01:15:51,201
We'll have Nature's support.
1033
01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:53,641
[SCREAMS]
1034
01:16:08,120 --> 01:16:09,406
I got you.
1035
01:16:58,840 --> 01:17:01,571
First of all, I'd like to say
that we were very fortunate
1036
01:17:01,760 --> 01:17:04,331
to catch things as early as we did.
1037
01:17:04,480 --> 01:17:07,927
That's especially true
in light of today's news.
1038
01:17:08,960 --> 01:17:10,769
Carla's pregnant.
1039
01:17:10,920 --> 01:17:14,845
And I want everyone here
to know that myself
1040
01:17:15,000 --> 01:17:17,446
and the staff here at the hospital
are prepared to do
1041
01:17:17,600 --> 01:17:20,809
everything that we possibly can
to help her and Marco
1042
01:17:20,960 --> 01:17:23,725
in their transition to the outside world.
1043
01:17:24,560 --> 01:17:26,722
Wow, I really want to be happy about this,
1044
01:17:26,880 --> 01:17:28,450
but I'm sorry, I can't.
1045
01:17:28,600 --> 01:17:29,647
I can't be.
1046
01:17:29,800 --> 01:17:34,124
We promise that
we're both gonna take our medication.
1047
01:17:34,280 --> 01:17:37,443
We're both responsible in the situation.
1048
01:17:37,600 --> 01:17:40,126
You know,
my daughter means everything to me.
1049
01:17:40,280 --> 01:17:42,487
And I would help you to get a job.
1050
01:17:42,640 --> 01:17:44,688
Thank you.
1051
01:17:49,080 --> 01:17:51,242
- You have your interview tomorrow, right?
- Yeah.
1052
01:17:51,400 --> 01:17:52,731
You know, I was thinking about that.
1053
01:17:52,880 --> 01:17:55,201
Do you know what
I was thinking would be cool?
1054
01:17:56,720 --> 01:17:59,644
Maybe I could walk dogs.
1055
01:17:59,800 --> 01:18:01,689
I'd be out there,
I'd be working, you know?
1056
01:18:01,840 --> 01:18:03,842
I'd be, the same time,
taking everything in,
1057
01:18:04,000 --> 01:18:05,889
the sounds, the trees,
1058
01:18:06,040 --> 01:18:08,008
the buildings, the... just all of it,
1059
01:18:08,200 --> 01:18:10,282
sort of just absorbing all of that,
and then like,
1060
01:18:10,440 --> 01:18:14,604
letting that sort of be infused
into my poetry, you know?
1061
01:18:14,760 --> 01:18:18,323
We did tell our parents that we were going
to try to support ourselves with...
1062
01:18:18,480 --> 01:18:21,529
Exactly. And that's why
I'm thinking of things to do.
1063
01:18:21,680 --> 01:18:24,889
I mean, I just don't know
how much you would get paid.
1064
01:18:25,040 --> 01:18:28,965
With the baby we're going to have
diapers and blankets
1065
01:18:29,120 --> 01:18:33,284
and food and supplies and school
1066
01:18:33,440 --> 01:18:37,161
and strollers and the rent and, you know,
1067
01:18:37,320 --> 01:18:39,846
- play dates with birthday parties...
- Okay, okay.
1068
01:18:40,000 --> 01:18:41,729
- I mean, it's just gonna...
- Okay. Okay.
1069
01:18:41,880 --> 01:18:43,450
- You know?
- I know.
1070
01:18:43,600 --> 01:18:45,284
You're right.
1071
01:18:48,680 --> 01:18:50,364
[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
1072
01:18:52,280 --> 01:18:56,842
[MUFFLED CHATTERING]
1073
01:19:02,600 --> 01:19:04,568
[MUFFLED CHATTERING]
1074
01:19:04,760 --> 01:19:07,127
She's like the cutest
little roly-poly thing ever.
1075
01:19:07,280 --> 01:19:08,406
- Just want to eat her.
- Wow.
1076
01:19:08,560 --> 01:19:10,164
She's like a...
1077
01:19:27,760 --> 01:19:29,171
[CHUCKLES]
1078
01:19:29,320 --> 01:19:30,526
Hey, look.
1079
01:19:32,240 --> 01:19:33,321
That's cool.
1080
01:19:33,480 --> 01:19:35,801
Hey, what do you think
if we, like, painted
1081
01:19:36,000 --> 01:19:37,604
like, a giant mural of Starry Night,
1082
01:19:37,760 --> 01:19:39,364
like, all over the walls?
1083
01:19:39,520 --> 01:19:42,330
I love it. That's a great idea.
1084
01:19:42,480 --> 01:19:43,720
Yeah.
1085
01:19:43,920 --> 01:19:46,161
And then we could, like, fill the ceiling
1086
01:19:46,320 --> 01:19:49,927
with all those glow-in-the-dark stars,
you know?
1087
01:19:50,080 --> 01:19:51,320
- Yeah.
- Like those stickers.
1088
01:19:51,480 --> 01:19:55,963
Yeah, and maybe we could hang some up
here, you know, like a baby-mobile.
1089
01:19:56,120 --> 01:19:58,407
Yeah. And, you know what we could do?
1090
01:19:58,600 --> 01:20:01,729
- We could make, like, constellations.
- Yeah.
1091
01:20:01,880 --> 01:20:04,008
And we could, like,
invent our own constellations.
1092
01:20:04,160 --> 01:20:06,208
Like, we can, like,
go back and forth with it.
1093
01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:09,609
And, like, imagine, like...
imagine the three of us, like, all together,
1094
01:20:09,760 --> 01:20:11,569
publishing this, like, big book
1095
01:20:11,720 --> 01:20:15,202
with, like, all of the, like, illustrations
of all the different constellations.
1096
01:20:15,360 --> 01:20:17,840
What's wrong?
1097
01:20:18,040 --> 01:20:19,087
Nothing.
1098
01:20:19,240 --> 01:20:21,971
Well, you don't seem that...
you don't seem that excited.
1099
01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:23,485
No, I'm really excited.
1100
01:20:25,480 --> 01:20:26,720
You know what I was thinking?
1101
01:20:26,920 --> 01:20:32,370
I was thinking that we could put
the bookshelf right there.
1102
01:20:32,520 --> 01:20:33,646
And then we could maybe have...
1103
01:20:33,800 --> 01:20:35,643
- Whoa, wait! That's perfect!
- ...a rocking chair right here, right?
1104
01:20:35,800 --> 01:20:37,131
- No, that's perfect.
- Isn't that perfect?
1105
01:20:37,280 --> 01:20:38,441
Hang on, I'm gonna get it.
1106
01:20:51,680 --> 01:20:52,920
[CHUCKLES]
1107
01:20:53,760 --> 01:20:55,285
- I love it.
- Oh, that reminds me.
1108
01:20:59,240 --> 01:21:01,481
Look. Look-Iook-Iook-Iook-Iook.
1109
01:21:04,600 --> 01:21:06,568
Remember?
1110
01:21:06,720 --> 01:21:08,324
- Yes.
- And.
1111
01:21:12,160 --> 01:21:13,730
The Bible.
1112
01:21:20,200 --> 01:21:21,247
[MARCO CHUCKLES]
1113
01:21:21,400 --> 01:21:23,562
- Marco. Marco.
- What?
1114
01:21:26,840 --> 01:21:28,649
Have you been taking your medication?
1115
01:21:30,200 --> 01:21:31,850
Uh...
1116
01:21:34,080 --> 01:21:35,366
No.
1117
01:21:38,320 --> 01:21:39,481
No.
1118
01:21:41,640 --> 01:21:43,130
I can't.
1119
01:21:45,840 --> 01:21:48,446
We decided that, you know,
we weren't gonna...
1120
01:21:48,600 --> 01:21:50,728
- I know. We did.
- ...gonna do anything,
1121
01:21:50,920 --> 01:21:52,922
you know, reckless because I'm pregnant.
1122
01:21:53,080 --> 01:21:55,367
That doesn't mean
we have to take the medication.
1123
01:21:57,320 --> 01:21:59,209
I can get him to go back on the meds.
1124
01:21:59,360 --> 01:22:00,771
No, you can't.
1125
01:22:00,920 --> 01:22:02,410
Yes, I can.
1126
01:22:04,280 --> 01:22:05,520
We have to.
1127
01:22:05,680 --> 01:22:08,047
Carla, you can't.
1128
01:22:08,200 --> 01:22:09,486
If he didn't get the message
1129
01:22:09,640 --> 01:22:11,688
after he almost killed
the two of you in the river,
1130
01:22:11,840 --> 01:22:13,330
he's not going to get it.
1131
01:22:13,480 --> 01:22:15,448
Then what are you suggesting?
1132
01:22:15,600 --> 01:22:18,251
I don't see how you can stay with him.
1133
01:22:20,640 --> 01:22:23,484
What are you saying?
That I shouldn't have this child if...
1134
01:22:23,640 --> 01:22:26,325
I just want to be really clear. Okay?
1135
01:22:26,480 --> 01:22:31,008
You want to raise a child
with a psychotic manic parent.
1136
01:22:31,160 --> 01:22:34,960
[PAINTBRUSH BANGING]
1137
01:23:07,840 --> 01:23:09,171
[MARCO GRUNTS]
1138
01:23:16,840 --> 01:23:17,921
- [CARLA] Hi.
- Hi.
1139
01:23:18,080 --> 01:23:19,411
- I'm Carla.
- Hi. Kay Jamison.
1140
01:23:19,560 --> 01:23:21,210
- Nice to meet you.
- How do you do? Marco.
1141
01:23:21,360 --> 01:23:23,362
- Nice to meet you.
- It's such an honor to meet you.
1142
01:23:23,560 --> 01:23:24,971
Well, thank you.
1143
01:23:25,120 --> 01:23:26,610
This is incredible. I have to tell you,
1144
01:23:26,760 --> 01:23:30,731
you know, your books
have just been so meaningful to us,
1145
01:23:30,880 --> 01:23:34,851
and they've really helped us through a lot,
you know, both Carla and myself.
1146
01:23:35,000 --> 01:23:36,001
Well, I'm glad. Thank you.
1147
01:23:36,160 --> 01:23:37,764
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
1148
01:23:39,920 --> 01:23:42,161
Yeah, so May 1 st, we're due,
1149
01:23:42,320 --> 01:23:45,847
and we know there's
certain sacrifices that go along
1150
01:23:46,040 --> 01:23:49,010
with, you know... which...
1151
01:23:49,160 --> 01:23:52,084
Yeah, which you mentioned in terms
of taking medication,
1152
01:23:52,240 --> 01:23:53,765
whether or not to take medication
1153
01:23:53,960 --> 01:23:55,962
or whether you
are going to take medication.
1154
01:23:56,120 --> 01:23:58,885
My biggest concern is just having a child,
1155
01:23:59,040 --> 01:24:00,326
coming into this world,
1156
01:24:00,480 --> 01:24:03,165
you know, welcoming this new life...
1157
01:24:03,880 --> 01:24:07,680
and it sort of being
1158
01:24:08,360 --> 01:24:12,604
around two people who are duller
than they are used to, or...
1159
01:24:12,760 --> 01:24:14,683
When I first was medicated,
I was first medicated
1160
01:24:14,840 --> 01:24:15,966
a very long time ago.
1161
01:24:16,120 --> 01:24:18,122
Lithium had just come out on the market.
1162
01:24:18,320 --> 01:24:21,244
I was kept at a very high dose
because that's what people did at that time,
1163
01:24:21,400 --> 01:24:24,006
and I did feel somewhat dead,
and I resisted it.
1164
01:24:24,200 --> 01:24:25,964
But I'm still on lithium,
1165
01:24:26,160 --> 01:24:28,083
and I don't feel in any way inhibited.
1166
01:24:28,240 --> 01:24:30,083
I just don't know how I'm gonna make...
1167
01:24:32,400 --> 01:24:34,209
how my creativity is going to be affected.
1168
01:24:34,360 --> 01:24:37,648
You're concerned about losing your art
and losing your passion.
1169
01:24:37,840 --> 01:24:39,569
Medication's not going to take
your personality away.
1170
01:24:39,760 --> 01:24:41,569
It's not going to take your own gift.
1171
01:24:41,760 --> 01:24:43,444
It's a fire when it's out of control.
1172
01:24:43,640 --> 01:24:47,770
And what medication can do
is to kind of tamp that down a bit
1173
01:24:47,920 --> 01:24:49,604
without losing that gift.
1174
01:24:49,760 --> 01:24:54,641
It took quite a while
for my moods to kind of get in gear.
1175
01:24:54,800 --> 01:24:57,565
I have felt infinitely happier.
1176
01:24:57,720 --> 01:24:59,324
I'm more productive.
1177
01:24:59,480 --> 01:25:03,769
I'm more able to count on myself
to produce and write.
1178
01:25:03,920 --> 01:25:07,447
In every aspect of my life
it's been a godsend.
1179
01:25:07,600 --> 01:25:09,887
I thought she was really impressive.
Was cool, right?
1180
01:25:10,080 --> 01:25:11,525
[MARCO] She's weak.
1181
01:25:12,600 --> 01:25:15,410
She didn't have the strength,
so she gave up.
1182
01:25:15,560 --> 01:25:17,289
- What?
- You could see it in her.
1183
01:25:17,440 --> 01:25:19,966
She was like...
1184
01:25:20,120 --> 01:25:24,330
she wished that she could have what those
artists have that she writes about.
1185
01:25:24,480 --> 01:25:25,720
But she doesn't have the guts.
1186
01:25:25,880 --> 01:25:27,644
That's why she writes about them.
1187
01:25:28,880 --> 01:25:33,488
You know, do you think
that Poe or Byron or Tchaikovsky,
1188
01:25:33,640 --> 01:25:35,768
Melville, Hemingway, would've backed down
1189
01:25:35,920 --> 01:25:37,763
and turned away
from the storm the way she did?
1190
01:25:37,920 --> 01:25:39,410
No. They rode the tides.
1191
01:25:39,560 --> 01:25:41,085
They rode them, but she didn't.
1192
01:25:41,280 --> 01:25:42,645
That's why she writes about them,
1193
01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:46,009
because she wants to be like them
in her fantasy, but she can't.
1194
01:25:46,200 --> 01:25:48,965
Well, I liked what she had to say
about, you know,
1195
01:25:49,160 --> 01:25:51,367
how we can experience full emotion
even more than...
1196
01:25:51,520 --> 01:25:53,648
I don't want the full emotion!
1197
01:25:53,800 --> 01:25:55,723
- Well, then what do you want?
- I want the mania!
1198
01:25:58,040 --> 01:25:59,485
You want the mania?
1199
01:26:08,480 --> 01:26:10,960
- Well, it's fucking crazy.
- Why?
1200
01:26:11,120 --> 01:26:12,610
Because of something
that your doctor told you
1201
01:26:12,760 --> 01:26:14,364
- or something that your parents told you?
- No.
1202
01:26:14,560 --> 01:26:17,404
Because you're not willing
to make any sacrifices.
1203
01:26:17,560 --> 01:26:18,971
You say you want a family.
1204
01:26:19,120 --> 01:26:20,451
You say you want love.
1205
01:26:20,600 --> 01:26:22,489
But you're not willing to give
anything up for it.
1206
01:26:22,640 --> 01:26:24,847
We're gonna elevate the baby with it.
1207
01:26:25,000 --> 01:26:26,445
It's a gift, Carla.
1208
01:26:26,600 --> 01:26:27,840
No, no, it's not a gift.
1209
01:26:28,000 --> 01:26:29,365
- And you...
- Fuck!
1210
01:26:30,720 --> 01:26:32,370
What is this?
1211
01:26:33,080 --> 01:26:36,721
This, all this about the poetry,
about the beauty of it?
1212
01:26:36,920 --> 01:26:38,251
Is this just bullshit?
1213
01:26:38,400 --> 01:26:40,323
Let's just fucking cut it out, Carla.
1214
01:26:40,480 --> 01:26:41,561
- Don't. Please, no.
- Fucking cancer.
1215
01:26:41,720 --> 01:26:42,846
Yup. Tear it out.
1216
01:26:43,000 --> 01:26:46,163
- Stop.
- Why do we wanna infect our baby with this?
1217
01:26:46,320 --> 01:26:48,049
- Here. You take it, Carla!
- Don't!
1218
01:26:52,440 --> 01:26:54,044
Carla, I'm sorry.
1219
01:27:00,560 --> 01:27:02,369
Carla, I'm so sorry.
1220
01:27:18,320 --> 01:27:19,446
Carla?
1221
01:27:22,360 --> 01:27:23,566
Shit.
1222
01:27:24,680 --> 01:27:26,250
[MARCO] Hello?
1223
01:27:33,680 --> 01:27:35,603
I tried calling you all day.
1224
01:27:48,840 --> 01:27:51,969
I didn't mean to push you like that.
1225
01:27:56,520 --> 01:27:58,727
I never want to hurt you.
1226
01:28:02,760 --> 01:28:04,285
I'm so sorry.
1227
01:28:07,280 --> 01:28:08,611
Please.
1228
01:28:13,080 --> 01:28:14,161
[SIGHS]
1229
01:28:25,480 --> 01:28:26,606
Have you been drinking?
1230
01:28:36,400 --> 01:28:37,640
Marco.
1231
01:28:50,320 --> 01:28:52,561
[SOBS]
1232
01:29:17,440 --> 01:29:18,601
- Oh, hey.
- Surprise.
1233
01:29:18,760 --> 01:29:20,489
- Hey, honey.
- Hey.
1234
01:29:22,840 --> 01:29:23,966
What's going on?
1235
01:29:24,120 --> 01:29:26,646
- Hey, come here. Surprise.
- What's going on?
1236
01:29:26,840 --> 01:29:28,444
I wanted to throw us
a surprise baby shower.
1237
01:29:28,600 --> 01:29:31,723
I called all of our parents, and I thought
we could have a surprise baby shower.
1238
01:29:31,880 --> 01:29:33,450
Well, you actually said
it was an urgent meeting,
1239
01:29:33,600 --> 01:29:35,011
- so that's why we rushed over.
- I know.
1240
01:29:35,160 --> 01:29:36,924
I wanted it to be
a surprise for all of us.
1241
01:29:37,080 --> 01:29:38,730
Oh, no, it's okay. So good to see you.
1242
01:29:38,880 --> 01:29:40,609
Hi, sweetheart. You okay?
1243
01:29:40,760 --> 01:29:41,761
Oh, yeah. Everything's good.
1244
01:29:41,920 --> 01:29:42,967
- All right.
- It's good.
1245
01:29:43,120 --> 01:29:44,246
- Hi.
- Hi.
1246
01:29:44,440 --> 01:29:45,487
Good to see you.
1247
01:29:45,640 --> 01:29:47,642
Hey, you know, before we...
Hey, wait, hold on, hold on.
1248
01:29:47,800 --> 01:29:49,086
- Here you go. Here.
- No, thank you.
1249
01:29:49,240 --> 01:29:50,366
- Before we... Marco.
- Here you go.
1250
01:29:50,520 --> 01:29:52,363
- Marco, can I talk to you, please?
- Sure, sure.
1251
01:29:52,520 --> 01:29:54,761
- Do you guys mind if we just...
- Oh, please, no, that's fine.
1252
01:29:54,920 --> 01:29:56,445
No, I mean, now. Can we talk?
1253
01:29:56,600 --> 01:29:57,965
Could we talk now?
1254
01:29:58,160 --> 01:30:00,561
Oh, yeah, just give me one second, okay?
1255
01:30:00,720 --> 01:30:02,404
Let me get this open.
1256
01:30:02,560 --> 01:30:03,641
Just going to open this up.
1257
01:30:03,800 --> 01:30:05,290
- Oh.
- Be careful with that.
1258
01:30:05,440 --> 01:30:06,487
- [MARCO] Huh?
- [CORK POPS]
1259
01:30:06,640 --> 01:30:08,722
- [SARA] Aah.
- [MARCO CHUCKLES]
1260
01:30:08,920 --> 01:30:11,969
Whoa. Okay.
1261
01:30:14,400 --> 01:30:16,050
- Sorry.
- It's okay. It's all right.
1262
01:30:16,200 --> 01:30:17,281
- There you go.
- Just a little.
1263
01:30:17,440 --> 01:30:19,283
- That's fine.
- Okay? Sure?
1264
01:30:19,440 --> 01:30:20,646
- And a little bit.
- Marco.
1265
01:30:20,800 --> 01:30:21,801
- What?
- Just... What's going on?
1266
01:30:21,960 --> 01:30:22,961
- What?
- You all right?
1267
01:30:23,120 --> 01:30:24,884
It's all good.
1268
01:30:26,200 --> 01:30:27,406
Here.
1269
01:30:27,560 --> 01:30:28,846
- You want some?
- You know what?
1270
01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:31,651
Oh, you know what?
You probably shouldn't because of the baby.
1271
01:30:31,800 --> 01:30:34,804
I guess a little sip would be okay. Right?
1272
01:30:34,960 --> 01:30:37,645
I'll just pour you some,
and then when I finish making the toast...
1273
01:30:39,240 --> 01:30:40,924
you can decide.
1274
01:30:44,120 --> 01:30:45,610
Sorry. I forgot something.
1275
01:30:51,840 --> 01:30:54,810
Here we go. Got you a gift.
1276
01:30:54,960 --> 01:30:56,803
- Thank you.
- Open it.
1277
01:30:57,840 --> 01:30:59,126
Open it, open it, open it.
1278
01:31:18,200 --> 01:31:20,487
Carla and I have been looking
for children's books...
1279
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:25,844
and I came across this one a few days ago,
1280
01:31:26,040 --> 01:31:28,441
and it just struck me as perfect,
you know?
1281
01:31:28,600 --> 01:31:32,002
You know, when we were
in the hospital together,
1282
01:31:32,160 --> 01:31:33,491
when we first met...
1283
01:31:35,640 --> 01:31:38,405
we imagined that we were
from another planet
1284
01:31:38,560 --> 01:31:40,881
because we don't belong here
on this earth.
1285
01:31:43,440 --> 01:31:47,161
And we liked to pretend
that one day we'd get to go back...
1286
01:31:49,040 --> 01:31:51,247
to our real planet, our home.
1287
01:31:54,360 --> 01:31:55,964
And in this book...
1288
01:31:58,640 --> 01:32:00,369
the little prince is from another planet,
1289
01:32:00,520 --> 01:32:01,806
but he's visiting Earth.
1290
01:32:03,320 --> 01:32:07,166
And... eventually
he wants to go back home,
1291
01:32:07,320 --> 01:32:10,244
but the only way that he can do that
is to die here on Earth.
1292
01:32:12,280 --> 01:32:16,285
So, this is a toast...
1293
01:32:17,640 --> 01:32:23,124
to a baby that will feel
like he belongs here, on Earth...
1294
01:32:25,640 --> 01:32:27,165
on this planet.
1295
01:32:30,760 --> 01:32:32,808
And won't have to die to go home.
1296
01:32:37,560 --> 01:32:39,005
Carla, I just made a toast.
1297
01:32:40,920 --> 01:32:42,922
- Carla.
- It's okay.
1298
01:32:43,080 --> 01:32:44,889
It's a toast. Raise the glass.
1299
01:32:45,080 --> 01:32:46,127
I...
1300
01:32:46,280 --> 01:32:48,248
Why don't you have a drink, Carla?
1301
01:32:52,080 --> 01:32:55,971
Are you still gonna pretend, after all
of this, that you still can't drink?
1302
01:33:01,560 --> 01:33:02,925
Because I know.
1303
01:33:04,560 --> 01:33:06,688
- Why don't you just say it?
- All right.
1304
01:33:06,840 --> 01:33:10,561
Just say it. Just say it, say it.
1305
01:33:10,720 --> 01:33:14,247
Carla had an abortion. Surprise.
1306
01:33:19,880 --> 01:33:21,370
Right?
1307
01:33:24,240 --> 01:33:26,004
So, why don't you just say it, Carla?
1308
01:33:26,200 --> 01:33:28,567
- Please say it, please.
- All right, I did.
1309
01:33:30,440 --> 01:33:32,647
[SARA] Oh, God.
1310
01:33:32,800 --> 01:33:34,404
How could you do that?
1311
01:33:34,560 --> 01:33:36,881
Did you forget everything?
1312
01:33:39,920 --> 01:33:41,365
No.
1313
01:33:44,000 --> 01:33:45,650
I didn't forget anything.
1314
01:33:45,800 --> 01:33:47,404
I thought you knew
that that was our miracle,
1315
01:33:47,600 --> 01:33:49,329
that that was our gift from God.
1316
01:33:49,480 --> 01:33:51,244
I thought you knew that!
1317
01:33:51,400 --> 01:33:53,050
- I did. I did!
- I thought you knew that
1318
01:33:53,200 --> 01:33:55,851
that was our gift from God!
So what changed?
1319
01:33:56,000 --> 01:33:57,001
- Because!
- What changed?
1320
01:33:57,160 --> 01:33:58,207
- Because!
- Why?
1321
01:33:58,400 --> 01:34:00,402
Because I didn't want it to be raised
by our illness!
1322
01:34:13,480 --> 01:34:15,050
So we're a mistake?
1323
01:34:21,120 --> 01:34:22,610
We're a mistake?
1324
01:34:24,600 --> 01:34:26,090
We're a mistake?
1325
01:34:28,680 --> 01:34:31,570
Are we a mistake, Carla? Are we a mistake?
1326
01:34:49,360 --> 01:34:50,566
So that's it.
1327
01:35:58,560 --> 01:36:01,769
[PHONE VIBRATING]
1328
01:36:04,880 --> 01:36:06,609
Hello?
1329
01:36:11,200 --> 01:36:12,531
What?
1330
01:36:51,880 --> 01:36:53,041
[CLEARS THROAT]
1331
01:36:54,720 --> 01:36:56,927
"As the sun and moon aligned in the sky,
1332
01:36:57,120 --> 01:36:59,521
they illuminated each other's shine.
1333
01:36:59,680 --> 01:37:03,651
And the closer to each other they moved,
the brighter they shined,
1334
01:37:03,800 --> 01:37:07,247
and the higher the fire inside of us grew.
1335
01:37:07,400 --> 01:37:10,085
As we raced through the days
on that fling,
1336
01:37:10,240 --> 01:37:11,480
each footprint we laid
1337
01:37:11,640 --> 01:37:15,201
blazed away that piece
of the earth's entire lifetime of beauty
1338
01:37:15,360 --> 01:37:17,647
in the brief second it touched our feet,
1339
01:37:17,800 --> 01:37:20,485
leaving nothing but ashes beneath us.
1340
01:37:20,640 --> 01:37:25,202
Until we had no ground left to stand on
and nowhere left to flee."
1341
01:37:25,400 --> 01:37:28,449
[MARCO] "And now that we've turned away
from our fire
1342
01:37:28,600 --> 01:37:31,968
to face the days that remained
unburned by the flames,
1343
01:37:32,120 --> 01:37:33,690
and learn to gaze at them
1344
01:37:33,840 --> 01:37:36,491
through sane eyes one day at a time.
1345
01:37:36,640 --> 01:37:39,962
We can look back at our book
with clear sight
1346
01:37:40,160 --> 01:37:43,562
and give it the ending
that we never got the chance to write.
1347
01:37:43,720 --> 01:37:47,611
And while I know it's too late
to pick up the ripped-up pages,
1348
01:37:47,760 --> 01:37:52,084
I will admit,
I still think of our little prince.
1349
01:37:52,240 --> 01:37:55,881
And sometimes I go outside
and look up at the sky
1350
01:37:56,040 --> 01:37:57,530
and think about what planet
1351
01:37:57,720 --> 01:37:59,882
he might've gone back to after he died.
1352
01:38:01,600 --> 01:38:03,841
Then I imagine the three of us
1353
01:38:04,000 --> 01:38:07,527
living up there as a family
in another lifetime.
1354
01:38:13,160 --> 01:38:16,721
But for now, you have your own life,
and I have mine.
1355
01:38:16,880 --> 01:38:19,611
And we have to live them
the way we would have
1356
01:38:19,760 --> 01:38:23,128
if we could go back to the day
we conceived our child
1357
01:38:23,280 --> 01:38:27,251
and were able to see what
our manic eyes were blind to at the time.
1358
01:38:30,200 --> 01:38:33,249
When the sun and moon finally came
as close as they could be
1359
01:38:33,400 --> 01:38:36,961
and the fire inside us rose
to its highest peak,
1360
01:38:37,120 --> 01:38:40,010
it leaped past
the fading ashes of our flesh
1361
01:38:40,160 --> 01:38:42,766
to burn our love into eternity,
1362
01:38:42,920 --> 01:38:44,763
through our baby.
1363
01:38:44,920 --> 01:38:46,490
That eternal flame
1364
01:38:46,640 --> 01:38:49,769
that could blaze brighter
than our manic one ever could
1365
01:38:49,920 --> 01:38:52,491
on its brightest mania days,
1366
01:38:52,640 --> 01:38:54,847
but that would also sustain."
1367
01:39:19,560 --> 01:39:24,043
[APPLAUSE]
1368
01:39:25,160 --> 01:39:27,640
- I'm really, really proud of you.
- Thanks.
1369
01:39:27,800 --> 01:39:29,290
Maybe you'll stop by later?
1370
01:39:37,960 --> 01:39:39,246
Hi.
1371
01:39:39,400 --> 01:39:40,640
Hey.
1372
01:39:42,120 --> 01:39:44,805
- I thought that went really well.
- Yeah.
1373
01:39:44,960 --> 01:39:47,327
- Was a really good idea.
- Yeah.
1374
01:39:47,480 --> 01:39:49,244
So how've you been?
1375
01:39:51,000 --> 01:39:54,083
Okay. How about you?
1376
01:39:56,520 --> 01:39:58,443
Good.
1377
01:39:58,600 --> 01:40:00,125
Yeah, really good.
1378
01:40:02,920 --> 01:40:04,365
Is that him?
1379
01:40:07,280 --> 01:40:08,520
Yeah.
1380
01:40:15,960 --> 01:40:17,849
He looks like a solid guy.
1381
01:40:18,840 --> 01:40:20,205
He is.
1382
01:40:24,560 --> 01:40:26,369
Well, I should go.
1383
01:40:29,960 --> 01:40:31,246
Hey, Marco.
1384
01:40:34,040 --> 01:40:35,929
It's so good to see you.
1385
01:40:38,600 --> 01:40:39,886
You, too.
1386
01:43:03,360 --> 01:43:05,408
[MAN] There was a time long ago
1387
01:43:05,560 --> 01:43:07,801
when tides would rise and winds would blow
1388
01:43:07,960 --> 01:43:11,203
when the stars pulsed spirals
of fire across the sky
1389
01:43:11,360 --> 01:43:14,045
and all the lunatics saw,
and all the lunatics knew
1390
01:43:14,200 --> 01:43:16,646
that the two eyes of God
had aligned in the sky
1391
01:43:16,800 --> 01:43:18,643
to give us a glimpse into the divine
1392
01:43:18,800 --> 01:43:20,564
And though the sane may deny
1393
01:43:20,720 --> 01:43:22,324
we gazed through God's eyes
1394
01:43:22,480 --> 01:43:24,801
and claim it was
just some misfiring synapses
1395
01:43:24,960 --> 01:43:26,769
flashing through a crack in our minds
1396
01:43:26,920 --> 01:43:28,160
we all knew it was true
1397
01:43:28,320 --> 01:43:29,685
we all knew we shared a view
1398
01:43:29,840 --> 01:43:31,729
into something just too beautiful to prove
1399
01:43:31,880 --> 01:43:33,962
and they can't take that away
from me and you
1400
01:43:38,560 --> 01:43:40,050
Even when the seasons change,
1401
01:43:40,200 --> 01:43:41,929
summer exceeds its stay,
1402
01:43:42,080 --> 01:43:43,764
the sun creeps away
1403
01:43:43,920 --> 01:43:46,605
and fall shadows grab hold of your brain
1404
01:43:46,760 --> 01:43:48,364
and you can feel your will
1405
01:43:48,520 --> 01:43:49,965
within each withering leaf
1406
01:43:50,160 --> 01:43:52,527
clinging to the trees of the entire forest
1407
01:43:52,680 --> 01:43:55,160
surrounding you slipping
as they fall down on you
1408
01:43:55,320 --> 01:43:57,163
and then when Winter rolls around,
1409
01:43:57,320 --> 01:44:00,529
your soul retreats
deep beneath the frozen ground
1410
01:44:00,680 --> 01:44:02,728
and it's calling your body down
1411
01:44:02,920 --> 01:44:05,571
and it feels like your ashes
are fighting gravity
1412
01:44:05,760 --> 01:44:08,240
even then, Spring will come again
1413
01:44:08,400 --> 01:44:10,289
and invite you to rise too high
1414
01:44:10,440 --> 01:44:12,124
and it's up for you to decide
1415
01:44:12,280 --> 01:44:14,282
if you'll repeat those seasonal tides
1416
01:44:14,440 --> 01:44:16,329
that will lay waste to your lives
1417
01:44:16,520 --> 01:44:18,284
But if you choose to live
1418
01:44:18,480 --> 01:44:20,289
you may look out at the sky
1419
01:44:20,480 --> 01:44:22,687
and reminisce about those times
1420
01:44:22,840 --> 01:44:24,649
when the Sun and the Moon would align
1421
01:44:24,800 --> 01:44:26,689
and each would find its other eye
1422
01:44:26,840 --> 01:44:29,969
so that God could cry
about what was lost and why
1423
01:44:30,120 --> 01:44:32,202
But I tell you not to miss those times
1424
01:44:32,360 --> 01:44:34,169
for the Sun still shines
1425
01:44:34,320 --> 01:44:35,924
and the Moon will still rise
1426
01:44:36,120 --> 01:44:38,851
and with just enough light
from the far off shine
1427
01:44:39,040 --> 01:44:40,451
of the sun across the sky
1428
01:44:40,600 --> 01:44:44,400
it will keep that divine sight
forever alive in your eyes
107135
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.