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1
00:00:03,210 --> 00:00:05,170
* My eyesare gettin' weary*
2
00:00:05,210 --> 00:00:07,290
* My back is gettin' tight*
3
00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:09,500
* I'm sittin' herein traffic*
4
00:00:09,550 --> 00:00:12,550
* On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
5
00:00:12,590 --> 00:00:16,180
* But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
6
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:21,390
* Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
7
00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:25,190
* 'Cause, baby,all my life*
8
00:00:25,230 --> 00:00:29,150
* I will be drivin' hometo you*
9
00:00:35,450 --> 00:00:38,070
-Ooh, that was sweet.
-Yeah.
10
00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:39,280
Why don't you go
put on a skirt,
11
00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:41,410
'cause you are my bitch.
12
00:00:41,450 --> 00:00:42,750
I just beat you
3 straight games.
13
00:00:42,790 --> 00:00:44,460
Yeah, you might've won
3 games,
14
00:00:44,500 --> 00:00:47,420
but, uh, I had
more total points.
15
00:00:47,460 --> 00:00:49,790
I don't think
that's possible.
16
00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:52,130
You lost.
Take it like a man.
17
00:00:56,550 --> 00:00:59,510
Sweet Mary.
18
00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,560
Should I wait for you,
should I go home?
19
00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:03,810
What?
20
00:01:03,850 --> 00:01:05,480
Wh-what's the deal?
21
00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:06,640
Oh, it's
a pole-dancing class.
22
00:01:06,690 --> 00:01:08,730
They got them
all over the place now.
23
00:01:08,770 --> 00:01:09,730
DOUG: Wow.
24
00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:11,270
Glad I wore
my baggy shorts.
25
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:12,610
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
26
00:01:20,410 --> 00:01:22,370
Some wild stuff, huh?
27
00:01:22,410 --> 00:01:23,450
See the one
in the middle?
28
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:24,750
That's my wife.
29
00:01:24,790 --> 00:01:26,580
She's good.
She's limber.
30
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,500
Yeah. She's been doing it
a couple of months.
31
00:01:28,540 --> 00:01:29,630
It's a great workout.
32
00:01:29,670 --> 00:01:31,500
And I'm not gonna
lie to you.
33
00:01:31,540 --> 00:01:32,750
It's been a nice addition
to the bedroom,
34
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:33,880
know what I'm saying?
35
00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:35,420
What?
36
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:36,630
You--
37
00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:38,840
Your wife pole-dances
for you in your home,
38
00:01:38,890 --> 00:01:40,760
in your bedroom?
39
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,220
Yeah.
40
00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:44,810
Hear that, Deac?
41
00:01:44,850 --> 00:01:46,430
His wife pole-dances
for him in his bedroom.
42
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,600
Did you know
that kind of thing
43
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:48,690
was going on
in the world?
44
00:01:48,730 --> 00:01:50,270
Uh-huh.
45
00:01:50,310 --> 00:01:52,270
Why, you think you want
Carrie to do that for you?
46
00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,570
Actually, I was thinking
47
00:01:53,610 --> 00:01:55,570
I want his wife
to do it for me.
48
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,530
But Carrie would
be good, too.
49
00:01:59,570 --> 00:02:01,280
You think you're gonna
suggest it to her?
50
00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:02,530
No, no, I can't do that.
51
00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:03,660
If she didn't want
to dress up as Batgirl,
52
00:02:03,700 --> 00:02:06,160
she ain't gonna want
to do this.
53
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,250
I don't know, man.
54
00:02:07,290 --> 00:02:08,290
It's supposed to be
a lot of fun.
55
00:02:08,330 --> 00:02:09,790
You know,
she might go for it.
56
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,960
Why, you think you could
bring this thing up to Kelly?
57
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,960
I guess so.
It never occurred to me.
58
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,840
We got plenty going on
in the bedroom as it is.
59
00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:21,720
Ever get tired of being
a racial stereotype?
60
00:02:24,890 --> 00:02:26,270
No.
61
00:02:27,770 --> 00:02:29,190
Do you?
62
00:02:32,770 --> 00:02:35,190
And then I got the dragon
in Atlantic City
63
00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:36,530
a couple of years ago.
64
00:02:36,570 --> 00:02:37,860
It's nice.
65
00:02:37,900 --> 00:02:40,610
It looks like he's
pretty mad at Yosemite Sam.
66
00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,820
What about you, Carrie?
Do you have any tats?
67
00:02:42,870 --> 00:02:44,330
Ah, tattoos? No.
68
00:02:44,370 --> 00:02:49,210
Heh. I have a job, so, yeah.
69
00:02:49,250 --> 00:02:51,960
Hey, it's really great that
you guys had us over like this.
70
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:55,590
I'm glad you chased us down
in the parking lot, Doug.
71
00:02:55,630 --> 00:02:57,510
I just had an instinct,
you know?
72
00:02:57,550 --> 00:02:59,260
So what else
you guys into?
73
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:00,720
I know you work out 'cause
I met you at the gym.
74
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,340
Right? I mean...
75
00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:04,390
Yeah, I do weights, like,
4 or 5 times a week--
76
00:03:04,430 --> 00:03:05,720
Excellent!
77
00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:07,850
How about you Anna Maria?
What do you do there?
78
00:03:07,890 --> 00:03:09,270
Um, treadmill.
79
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:10,810
Oh. And?
80
00:03:10,850 --> 00:03:12,350
Um, StairMaster sometimes.
81
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:13,560
Actually, I've been doing
a lot more--
82
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,980
Anything else?
Anything else you do there?
83
00:03:16,020 --> 00:03:18,690
Well, I've been taking
that pole-dancing class.
84
00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:20,530
That's crazy.
Pole-dancing.
85
00:03:20,570 --> 00:03:21,860
Crazy what these chicks
are into nowadays, isn't it?
86
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:23,620
I'll tell you what, Ed.
87
00:03:23,660 --> 00:03:25,490
Why don't we let the ladies
talk about that for a while,
88
00:03:25,530 --> 00:03:27,290
while we get another
beer in the kitchen, huh?
89
00:03:27,330 --> 00:03:28,370
Okay.
90
00:03:28,410 --> 00:03:29,870
I also take spinning
on Tuesdays.
91
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:31,040
You know, they just got
some new equip--
92
00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:32,830
Pole-dancing!
93
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,630
-Bye, thank you.
-Bye, guys. See ya.
94
00:03:35,670 --> 00:03:37,340
-Bye.
-Okay.
95
00:03:37,380 --> 00:03:39,380
Huh? Our new
go-to couple.
96
00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:40,880
Mm-hmm.
97
00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:42,760
-What were you thinking?
-What?
98
00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:44,430
Did you actually think
you can trick me
99
00:03:44,470 --> 00:03:46,430
into taking
a pole-dancing...?
100
00:03:46,470 --> 00:03:48,770
[DOPEY VOICE]
Duh, dat girl pole-dances.
101
00:03:48,810 --> 00:03:51,430
Me wanna pole-dance, too!
102
00:03:52,730 --> 00:03:54,020
I wasn't trying
to trick you.
103
00:03:54,060 --> 00:03:55,650
I just thought it was
a way to suggest it.
104
00:03:55,690 --> 00:03:56,820
You know, I figured if I
brought it up myself,
105
00:03:56,860 --> 00:03:58,320
you'd just get mad.
106
00:03:58,360 --> 00:03:59,690
Yeah. I'm mad now.
107
00:03:59,730 --> 00:04:02,400
Mad 'cause I had to
make steak for idiots.
108
00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,780
Why don't you have
an open mind?
109
00:04:03,820 --> 00:04:05,490
I mean, a lot of women
are pole-dancing nowadays.
110
00:04:05,530 --> 00:04:06,740
It's a whole thing,
and we're missing it.
111
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:08,030
No.
I'mnot missing it.
112
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,790
You'remissing it.
113
00:04:09,830 --> 00:04:11,830
I'm okay not gyrating around
like a 2-dollar whore.
114
00:04:11,870 --> 00:04:13,290
Try it once.
115
00:04:13,330 --> 00:04:14,580
[SCOFFS]
116
00:04:14,620 --> 00:04:16,000
Carrie, come on!
117
00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:18,920
Doug, I am not pole-dancing
for you in our bedroom.
118
00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:21,380
You know what, this is
so typical of you, too.
119
00:04:21,420 --> 00:04:23,430
As soon as the lights
go out upstairs,
120
00:04:23,470 --> 00:04:24,680
you're only looking out
for yourself.
121
00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:25,800
Look,
this wouldn't be just for me.
122
00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:27,100
It would be for us.
123
00:04:27,140 --> 00:04:28,720
Let me--let me show you
something here. Okay?
124
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,930
-Look at this.
-What's all that?
125
00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,060
Just some free information
126
00:04:32,100 --> 00:04:33,810
I got at the
pole-dancing class.
127
00:04:33,850 --> 00:04:36,650
Okay, look. All these women
talk about how at first,
128
00:04:36,690 --> 00:04:38,570
they were skeptical,
but after they tried it,
129
00:04:38,610 --> 00:04:41,610
they felt more sexual,
more empowered.
130
00:04:41,650 --> 00:04:44,570
Here, look at the Spanish lady
holding the briefcase, huh?
131
00:04:44,610 --> 00:04:47,370
[SPANISH ACCENT]
Yo soy empowermente.
132
00:04:48,990 --> 00:04:50,790
-Not interested.
-Okay, you know what?
133
00:04:50,830 --> 00:04:52,450
At least take a look
at the video.
134
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,410
They gave you a video?
135
00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:55,960
They didn't give it to me.
It was 29.95.
136
00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:57,580
Okay. You know what, Doug?
137
00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:59,840
Your pole-dancing fantasy
is not gonna happen, okay?
138
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:01,380
So just give it up.
139
00:05:04,550 --> 00:05:06,510
Well, we're already
on the mailing list.
140
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:38,750
MAN [ON TV]: * Roll,babe, with me tonight*
141
00:05:38,790 --> 00:05:41,590
* Would you like to roll*
142
00:05:41,630 --> 00:05:44,840
* Babe, with me tonight?*
143
00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:49,470
* Would you like to roll,babe*
144
00:05:49,510 --> 00:05:51,470
* With me tonight?*
145
00:05:51,510 --> 00:05:56,390
* Would you like to roll,babe, with me tonight?*
146
00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:58,060
What the hell is
Katie Couric up to now?
147
00:05:58,100 --> 00:05:59,770
-Hey, Dad.
-[STOPS VIDEOTAPE]
148
00:05:59,810 --> 00:06:01,860
Didn't hear you
back there.
149
00:06:01,900 --> 00:06:04,440
Oh, it's a tape.
What is it?
150
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,610
Uh, just
an instructional video
151
00:06:06,650 --> 00:06:08,530
from a class I may take.
152
00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:09,700
Well, I'm late for work.
153
00:06:09,740 --> 00:06:11,700
Love ya. Bye-bye.
154
00:06:15,580 --> 00:06:21,130
"Pole Cats. The Erotic
Art of Pole-dancing."
155
00:06:21,170 --> 00:06:23,090
Oh, dear God.
156
00:06:28,130 --> 00:06:30,090
-DOUG: Come on,
when's it getting here?
-[SPORTS PLAYING ON TV]
157
00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:31,510
Sit down, will ya?
Looking out the window
158
00:06:31,550 --> 00:06:35,270
is not gonna make the pole
get here any faster.
159
00:06:35,310 --> 00:06:36,520
It's almost 5,
and Express Mail
160
00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:38,020
guaranteed delivery before 5!
161
00:06:38,060 --> 00:06:40,150
Express Mail?
Why don't you use us?
162
00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:41,810
Us? We suck.
163
00:06:43,110 --> 00:06:45,360
I can't believe
Carrie went for it.
164
00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:47,360
She doesn't seem like
the pleasing you type.
165
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,400
She didn't want
to do it at first,
166
00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:51,030
but after she tried it
for a couple of weeks,
167
00:06:51,070 --> 00:06:52,370
she really loves it.
168
00:06:52,410 --> 00:06:53,950
She says it gets her
in touch with her inner whore.
169
00:06:53,990 --> 00:06:55,200
It's nice.
170
00:06:56,540 --> 00:06:59,290
And the rich get richer.
171
00:06:59,330 --> 00:07:01,080
Oh, man, I want
this thing to come quick.
172
00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:03,040
You know, I am ready
for my first dance.
173
00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:04,340
You know what
I'm saying? Ready.
174
00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:06,500
-Uh-huh.
-Hey, check this out.
175
00:07:06,550 --> 00:07:09,130
Look what she made
for me. Coupons.
176
00:07:10,630 --> 00:07:13,050
"Good for
one free pole dance
177
00:07:13,090 --> 00:07:15,010
from Misty Heffernan."
178
00:07:16,510 --> 00:07:19,980
Don't you guys have an aunt
named Misty Heffernan?
179
00:07:20,020 --> 00:07:21,440
Yeah. She just had
hip surgery.
180
00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,980
Good lady.
181
00:07:25,020 --> 00:07:27,360
Guess who's here.
The pole fairy!
182
00:07:28,570 --> 00:07:31,150
Someone just bought himself
a new nickname.
183
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,070
Come on, guys,
give me a hand.
184
00:07:36,030 --> 00:07:37,160
SPENCE: Hey, Arthur.
I'm gonna make a sandwich.
185
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:38,500
-You want one?
-No.
186
00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:39,910
You sure?
187
00:07:39,950 --> 00:07:41,250
A man who turns
his own daughter
188
00:07:41,290 --> 00:07:42,500
into an exotic dancer
189
00:07:42,540 --> 00:07:44,330
does not deserve to eat.
190
00:07:45,420 --> 00:07:47,500
They've got
fresh corned beef.
191
00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:48,880
No!
192
00:07:52,090 --> 00:07:53,680
Well, there it goes.
193
00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:56,260
A 10-foot arrow
through my heart.
194
00:07:59,180 --> 00:08:01,060
What are you even
talking about?
195
00:08:01,100 --> 00:08:02,560
Damn it, man,
don't you understand?
196
00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:04,900
When a child doesn't get
enough love and affection
197
00:08:04,940 --> 00:08:06,190
from her own father,
198
00:08:06,230 --> 00:08:08,270
she seeks it
from strange men.
199
00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:10,110
That's why Carrie's
doing this.
200
00:08:10,150 --> 00:08:11,700
Because I spent her childhood
201
00:08:11,740 --> 00:08:14,200
chasing after
the almighty dollar.
202
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:15,950
How'd that work out
for you?
203
00:08:17,490 --> 00:08:18,700
Look, Arthur,
204
00:08:18,740 --> 00:08:20,200
you're getting
worked up over nothing.
205
00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:21,450
Okay? She's just gonna
dance for Doug.
206
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:23,330
Oh, sure, that's
how it starts.
207
00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:26,210
Then it's peep shows,
strip joints,
208
00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:28,040
and before long,
she's at the Port Authority
209
00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:29,380
in hot pants,
210
00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:30,550
beckoning drunken Marines
211
00:08:30,590 --> 00:08:32,420
into the back of
an abandoned bus.
212
00:08:33,340 --> 00:08:34,680
What's that?
213
00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:36,550
Pumpernickel?
214
00:08:36,590 --> 00:08:38,260
Cut me off half.
215
00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,140
CARRIE: Doug...
216
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,650
Yeah?
217
00:08:45,690 --> 00:08:48,230
CARRIE:
Misty is ready!
218
00:08:50,110 --> 00:08:52,440
Don't forget the coupon.
219
00:09:01,620 --> 00:09:03,120
M-Misty?
220
00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:05,210
CARRIE:
I'm in the bathroom.
221
00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:08,380
-Turn on the music
and settle in, big boy.
-Okay.
222
00:09:13,340 --> 00:09:16,720
MAN [OVER TAPE]: The PelicanBrief, byJohn Grisham.
223
00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:19,140
CARRIE: The CD!
Not the tape!
224
00:09:19,180 --> 00:09:22,430
WOMAN [OVER SPEAKERS]:
* Boy, you*
225
00:09:22,470 --> 00:09:26,350
* Really gotta have you*
226
00:09:26,390 --> 00:09:29,610
* I've been patiently*
227
00:09:29,650 --> 00:09:31,570
* Waiting long time*
228
00:09:31,610 --> 00:09:35,530
* Got to have it now*
229
00:09:35,570 --> 00:09:38,240
* Want you*
230
00:09:38,280 --> 00:09:42,410
* Baby,gotta have you*
231
00:09:42,450 --> 00:09:44,750
* I'll make love to you*
232
00:09:44,790 --> 00:09:47,290
* And change your life*
233
00:09:47,330 --> 00:09:50,460
* Got tohave it now*
234
00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:54,550
* Nobody knowsthe sexy connection I feel*
235
00:09:54,590 --> 00:09:58,550
* Nobody knows it, boy,but me*
236
00:09:58,590 --> 00:10:00,050
* Long time*
237
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:03,560
* Got to have it now*
238
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,520
* Want you*
239
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:10,560
* Really gotta have you*
240
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,150
* I'll make love to you*
241
00:10:13,190 --> 00:10:16,110
* And change your life*
242
00:10:16,150 --> 00:10:18,410
* Got tohave it now*
243
00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:22,490
* Nobody knowsthe sexy connection I feel*
244
00:10:22,530 --> 00:10:27,210
* Nobody knows it, boy,but me*
245
00:10:27,250 --> 00:10:29,620
* You were sent to bemy fantasy...*
246
00:10:36,550 --> 00:10:37,800
[KNOCKS ON DOOR]
247
00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:39,720
Hey. So...?
248
00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:41,550
How was
opening night?
249
00:10:41,590 --> 00:10:44,060
Oh. The pole-dancing.
250
00:10:44,100 --> 00:10:45,270
It was good. It was good.
251
00:10:45,310 --> 00:10:46,390
DEACON: All right.
252
00:10:46,430 --> 00:10:47,520
So, you...
253
00:10:47,560 --> 00:10:48,560
It was hot?
254
00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:50,060
Sizzlin'.
255
00:10:50,100 --> 00:10:51,150
Ohh.
256
00:10:51,190 --> 00:10:52,860
She, uh...
257
00:10:52,900 --> 00:10:54,860
She really...
258
00:10:54,900 --> 00:10:56,480
really...
259
00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:59,280
shouldn't be pole-dancing.
260
00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:01,740
Oh, really?
That's too bad.
261
00:11:01,780 --> 00:11:03,530
-No good?
-No.
262
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:07,330
-No.
-Aww.
263
00:11:07,370 --> 00:11:08,870
She tried,
God bless her.
264
00:11:08,910 --> 00:11:11,370
You know, I mean, she was doing
everything they taught her
265
00:11:11,420 --> 00:11:13,540
and going through
the moves.
266
00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:15,380
I definitely got a sense
of what it was supposed to be.
267
00:11:15,420 --> 00:11:17,170
Hmm.
268
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:19,130
Makes you really
appreciate the pros, huh?
269
00:11:19,170 --> 00:11:20,510
Oh, you said it, brother.
270
00:11:20,550 --> 00:11:21,630
All right,
so it didn't work out.
271
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,180
Just get rid of the pole
and move on.
272
00:11:23,220 --> 00:11:25,140
I can't. I'm the one
who got her into it,
273
00:11:25,180 --> 00:11:26,560
and now she's hooked.
274
00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:28,270
She's thinking of making it
an every-night thing,
275
00:11:28,310 --> 00:11:30,600
and she's even talking
about putting in a spotlight.
276
00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:35,820
I gotta tell you,
Deac,
277
00:11:35,860 --> 00:11:38,230
you were smart for not
getting Kelly involved.
278
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,530
Uh, yeah. Ahem.
279
00:11:42,740 --> 00:11:44,620
What?
280
00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:45,780
It's just...
281
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,240
after that day at the gym,
I actually did
282
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:48,830
kind of suggest it
to Kelly,
283
00:11:48,870 --> 00:11:50,580
and she's been doing
it since then.
284
00:11:50,620 --> 00:11:52,500
Really?
285
00:11:52,540 --> 00:11:53,710
How is she?
286
00:11:53,750 --> 00:11:55,040
She's pretty damn good.
287
00:11:58,920 --> 00:12:01,590
Good morning.
288
00:12:01,630 --> 00:12:03,180
-DOUG: Hey.
-Honey.
289
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:06,600
So last night was...
290
00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:07,890
okay?
291
00:12:07,930 --> 00:12:09,680
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Uh-huh.
292
00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:11,270
And you were right.
293
00:12:11,310 --> 00:12:13,560
Yo soy empowermente.
294
00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,280
Oh, and by the way,
before I forget,
295
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:22,200
I got another coupon
for you.
296
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:23,610
Oh, that's okay.
I really have some--
297
00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:25,530
-No, take it.
-Okay, okay, yeah, yeah.
298
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:26,870
I'll take it.
299
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,380
Okay, uh,
we gotta get going.
300
00:12:36,420 --> 00:12:37,460
-Deac, come on.
-Yeah, yeah. Bye, Carrie.
301
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:38,960
All right,
bye, you guys.
302
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,460
-Bye, Deac.
-See you later.
303
00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:43,220
[CHUCKLES]
304
00:12:43,260 --> 00:12:45,300
Darling, I realize
I haven't been giving you
305
00:12:45,340 --> 00:12:47,470
the time and attention
you deserve.
306
00:12:47,510 --> 00:12:49,350
Are you free
this Saturday afternoon?
307
00:12:49,390 --> 00:12:50,640
-Um--
-For the love of God,
308
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:51,890
just say yes!
309
00:12:52,930 --> 00:12:54,230
Yes.
310
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:56,600
It's gonna be all right.
311
00:12:56,650 --> 00:12:58,610
Daddy's here.
312
00:12:58,650 --> 00:13:02,440
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
313
00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:24,840
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
314
00:13:35,350 --> 00:13:37,350
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
315
00:13:52,580 --> 00:13:54,410
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
316
00:13:58,670 --> 00:13:59,920
[CRASH]
317
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:04,340
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING
IN DISTANCE]
318
00:14:07,050 --> 00:14:10,550
Make it stop!
319
00:14:17,020 --> 00:14:18,310
What are you
still doing here?
320
00:14:18,350 --> 00:14:19,810
Your shift was over
4 hours ago.
321
00:14:19,850 --> 00:14:21,230
Yeah, I know.
Just cleaning out
322
00:14:21,270 --> 00:14:23,360
the old locker. Heh.
You know my motto.
323
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:25,940
A messy locker's
the devil's playground.
324
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:28,950
I thought your motto
was "Eat through the pain".
325
00:14:28,990 --> 00:14:31,280
A guy can't have
two mottos?
326
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,830
Listen to me, player.
327
00:14:34,740 --> 00:14:37,290
Go home.
328
00:14:37,330 --> 00:14:39,250
I can't.
329
00:14:39,290 --> 00:14:41,130
She's there limbering up
as we speak.
330
00:14:42,460 --> 00:14:44,050
I can't sit
in that chair again.
331
00:14:44,090 --> 00:14:45,710
You can't live
like this, man.
332
00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:47,050
Deac, she gave me
more coupons.
333
00:14:47,090 --> 00:14:49,260
50, damn it!
50 coupons!
334
00:14:50,510 --> 00:14:52,890
I used to--I used
to love pole-dancing.
335
00:14:52,930 --> 00:14:54,430
I used to love coupons.
336
00:14:54,470 --> 00:14:56,140
I got an Arby's coupon
in my wallet,
337
00:14:56,180 --> 00:14:58,390
for the last two weeks,
I can't even look at it!
338
00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,070
It's time now.
339
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:10,030
Nothing's worked, Spence.
340
00:15:10,070 --> 00:15:12,320
I've showered her
with fatherly affection
341
00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:13,910
for 2 entire weeks,
342
00:15:13,950 --> 00:15:15,910
but still she goes
back up there every night
343
00:15:15,950 --> 00:15:17,910
and gets her freak on
for fatty.
344
00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:21,880
So, where do you
wanna get dinner?
345
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,380
Oh, can I talk you
into Ethiopian?
346
00:15:24,420 --> 00:15:26,920
Not in the mood
for gazelle, thank you.
347
00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:30,130
Hey, look!
348
00:15:30,180 --> 00:15:32,140
-That gives me an idea.
-SPENCE: What?
349
00:15:32,180 --> 00:15:34,010
I'll get one of the strippers
to come home
350
00:15:34,050 --> 00:15:35,720
and tell Carrie
what life on the pole
351
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,020
is really like,
352
00:15:37,060 --> 00:15:39,770
every depraved
and pathetic detail.
353
00:15:39,810 --> 00:15:41,390
She'll be scared straight.
What do you think?
354
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:43,190
Sounds pretty stupid.
355
00:15:43,230 --> 00:15:44,900
Come on.
356
00:15:44,940 --> 00:15:46,360
But...
357
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,360
doesn't look clean
in there.
358
00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:01,120
[WHISPERS]
Please be asleep.
359
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,000
CARRIE: Doug...?
360
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:10,340
[QUAVERING]
Yeah.
361
00:16:10,380 --> 00:16:13,130
CARRIE: You're laaate.
362
00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:14,890
[QUIET]
Not late enough.
363
00:16:37,450 --> 00:16:39,410
Welcome
to the champagne room.
364
00:16:40,870 --> 00:16:42,040
Come in.
365
00:16:46,460 --> 00:16:49,420
[MUSIC STARTS]
366
00:16:49,460 --> 00:16:50,920
[MUSIC STOPS]
367
00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:53,050
Why'd you
turn it off?
368
00:16:53,090 --> 00:16:54,130
I don't know.
I thought we'd, uh,
369
00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:55,550
change it up
a little tonight.
370
00:16:55,590 --> 00:16:57,470
Oh, yeah? Okay, how about
some different music?
371
00:16:57,510 --> 00:17:01,100
How about a little
Hot For Teacher?
372
00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:02,140
Heh heh heh.
373
00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:03,270
That's all right. Uh...
374
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:04,440
I thought maybe, you know,
375
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:05,940
maybe I'd do something
for you, you know.
376
00:17:05,980 --> 00:17:07,860
You want a massage?
How about a sexy massage?
377
00:17:07,900 --> 00:17:10,280
Oh. Yeah.
I would love that.
378
00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:11,940
-All right.
-Heh heh heh.
379
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:13,820
There we go.
380
00:17:13,860 --> 00:17:15,280
All right.
381
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:16,990
Mm-hmm.
382
00:17:17,030 --> 00:17:18,070
Oh, that's nice.
383
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,450
Oh, it is, right?
384
00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:22,450
So relaxing I could
just fall asleep.
385
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:27,290
Just go ahead then
there, Misty.
386
00:17:27,330 --> 00:17:29,840
Mm-mmm. Misty doesn't
want to sleep.
387
00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:32,960
She has a new dance
for her man tonight.
388
00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:35,510
That's okay. Sleep.
389
00:17:35,550 --> 00:17:37,510
-You sleep, Misty.
-Mm-mmm.
390
00:17:37,550 --> 00:17:39,220
First, a dance.
391
00:17:39,260 --> 00:17:42,220
-No, you sleep. Sleep.
-Doug, get off!
392
00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:43,520
Okay.
393
00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:46,100
Just thought Misty
could use a little sleep.
394
00:17:46,140 --> 00:17:48,860
I know, but there'll be
enough time for that later.
395
00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:55,860
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
396
00:18:00,490 --> 00:18:04,040
* All the time*
397
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:08,630
* Even now,all alone*
398
00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:12,550
* All beside,turn you over*
399
00:18:12,590 --> 00:18:14,210
* We both--*
400
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,470
Stop it!
401
00:18:15,510 --> 00:18:18,130
What? Why'd you turn
the music off, baby?
402
00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:19,430
It was either that
or dive out the window.
403
00:18:19,470 --> 00:18:20,930
Carrie...
404
00:18:20,970 --> 00:18:23,520
Carrie,
you're horrible at this.
405
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:24,970
What, you think I'm
horrible at this?
406
00:18:25,020 --> 00:18:26,180
No, no.
You're not horrible.
407
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:28,980
That's a little unfair.
But you're...
408
00:18:29,020 --> 00:18:31,020
No, you are.
You're horrible.
409
00:18:31,060 --> 00:18:32,400
What, so for
the last 2 weeks,
410
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:34,360
you've just been
pretending to like it?
411
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,650
Kind of, yeah.
412
00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:39,360
-I can't believe this.
-Carrie, so what?
413
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:42,410
This stupid pole thing
didn't work out. Who cares?
414
00:18:42,450 --> 00:18:44,950
I still think you're the sexiest
woman I've ever known!
415
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,410
I mean,
we have each other,
416
00:18:46,450 --> 00:18:48,370
and that's the only
damn thing that matters.
417
00:18:50,540 --> 00:18:51,630
Ohh!
418
00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:53,340
You're an ass.
419
00:18:53,380 --> 00:18:55,050
This was your idea
in the first place, you know.
420
00:18:55,090 --> 00:18:56,300
-I know.
-And now you're telling me
421
00:18:56,340 --> 00:18:57,470
that I suck at it?
I mean, do you know
422
00:18:57,510 --> 00:18:59,550
-how humiliating this is?
-I know.
423
00:18:59,590 --> 00:19:03,010
We've both gone through
hell these past 2 weeks.
424
00:19:03,050 --> 00:19:04,310
And you know what, Doug?
425
00:19:04,350 --> 00:19:06,060
You really don't know
what you're talking about,
426
00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:08,600
because my instructor said I am
very, very talented at this.
427
00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,150
Yeah. That's 'cause
you're paying her.
428
00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:12,270
No, no. I'm doing
the moves exactly
429
00:19:12,310 --> 00:19:13,440
like she taught us.
430
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:14,520
Okay, you might be
doing them right
431
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:15,940
technically, but you--
432
00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:17,190
you're just not...
433
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:19,400
Not what?
434
00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:21,360
Look, you...
435
00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:24,030
You're not
feeling it, okay?
436
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,660
You're not living it.
437
00:19:25,700 --> 00:19:27,370
Like that spin-kick move
you do...
438
00:19:27,410 --> 00:19:28,500
Yeah.
439
00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:29,580
You...
440
00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:31,370
L-let me just show you.
441
00:19:34,460 --> 00:19:35,630
[MUSIC STARTS]
442
00:19:35,670 --> 00:19:37,210
[DOUG SIGHS]
443
00:19:37,260 --> 00:19:41,550
You need to become one
with the pole, you know?
444
00:19:41,590 --> 00:19:44,430
Just feel it.
Just feel it. Just have fun.
445
00:19:44,470 --> 00:19:46,310
'Cause you gotta feel it.
Feel it every time.
446
00:19:46,350 --> 00:19:48,390
You gotta become one--
and just enjoy it.
447
00:19:48,430 --> 00:19:50,350
Enjoy who you are,
you know what I'm saying?
448
00:20:01,450 --> 00:20:03,530
Oh, and that
upside-down move you do
449
00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,280
when you get up there,
you're here.
450
00:20:05,330 --> 00:20:07,620
You know, you gotta go
here like this.
451
00:20:07,660 --> 00:20:10,120
And when you slide down,
452
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:11,710
you're an angel.
453
00:20:11,750 --> 00:20:13,120
When you're coming down,
you're an angel.
454
00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:15,460
I'm an angel, okay?
455
00:20:18,130 --> 00:20:20,340
And this--
and this here.
456
00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:27,390
Okay?
457
00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:32,730
Just feel it.
Let it--feel it.
458
00:20:32,770 --> 00:20:34,810
Work it...
459
00:20:34,850 --> 00:20:36,820
and become it.
460
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:40,490
* So light a candle*
461
00:20:40,530 --> 00:20:44,360
* And turn the lightsdown low*
462
00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:52,210
Carrie--
463
00:20:52,250 --> 00:20:53,460
We should probably
shut the door.
464
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:54,670
-Your father--
-No. My dad's not home.
465
00:20:54,710 --> 00:20:56,670
* 'Cause I'malways satisfied*
466
00:20:56,710 --> 00:20:58,250
* You ready for me *
467
00:20:58,290 --> 00:21:00,380
* Puttin' in overtime *
468
00:21:00,420 --> 00:21:02,590
I still haven't
had dinner.
469
00:21:02,630 --> 00:21:05,180
Shut up
and get more singles.
470
00:21:15,060 --> 00:21:17,520
It's nice to spend
time together, huh?
471
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:19,110
I'm not gonna stop
pole dancing, Arthur.
472
00:21:19,150 --> 00:21:21,530
Fine!
Throw your life away!
473
00:21:25,610 --> 00:21:28,450
[**]
33011
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