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00:00:02,660 --> 00:00:05,040
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
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00:00:06,460 --> 00:00:08,550
[DOORBELL RINGS]
3
00:00:21,350 --> 00:00:22,810
I'll be right back.
4
00:00:22,850 --> 00:00:26,100
SINGER: *My eyesare gettin' weary*
5
00:00:26,150 --> 00:00:28,610
*My back is gettin' tight*
6
00:00:28,650 --> 00:00:30,530
*I'm sittin' herein traffic*
7
00:00:30,570 --> 00:00:33,530
*On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
8
00:00:33,570 --> 00:00:39,120
*But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
9
00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:42,580
*Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
10
00:00:44,660 --> 00:00:46,370
*'Cause, baby,all my life*
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00:00:46,420 --> 00:00:50,750
*I will be drivin' hometo you*
12
00:01:04,810 --> 00:01:05,940
So?
13
00:01:05,980 --> 00:01:07,060
What?
14
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:10,070
Hello? My highlights?
15
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,820
What do you think, huh?
16
00:01:13,860 --> 00:01:16,280
What are you
hoping for here?
17
00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:19,160
Hey, you did it.
They look great.
18
00:01:20,620 --> 00:01:22,200
All right, boys,
say hello to a winner.
19
00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:23,620
-He won hoop tickets.
-Hey.
20
00:01:23,660 --> 00:01:25,040
Can I tell
my own story, please?
21
00:01:25,080 --> 00:01:27,290
DANNY: Oh, man. These are
great seats, too.
22
00:01:27,330 --> 00:01:29,000
-How'd you get 'em?
-I just happened to know
23
00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:30,170
the phrase that pays,
24
00:01:30,210 --> 00:01:32,880
"Buzz 97 rocks my world!"
25
00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:35,720
I mean, it doesn't,
but I wanted the tickets.
26
00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:37,630
Their morning zoo
is hilarious.
27
00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:39,260
Yesterday,
Spanky and the Worm
28
00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:40,850
crank-called
this old couple
29
00:01:40,890 --> 00:01:42,890
and told them
their dog had died.
30
00:01:42,930 --> 00:01:44,720
[BOTH LAUGHING]
31
00:01:44,770 --> 00:01:46,060
Oh, classic
"The Worm."
32
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:47,560
Oh.
33
00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:49,150
Thanks, man, but I'm already
going to the game
34
00:01:49,190 --> 00:01:50,770
with somebody else.
35
00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:51,900
What? With who?
36
00:01:51,940 --> 00:01:53,150
This guy just moved
into my building.
37
00:01:53,190 --> 00:01:54,980
-He asked me to go.
-Well, tell this guy
38
00:01:55,030 --> 00:01:56,820
you just met you're already
going with your friends.
39
00:01:56,860 --> 00:01:58,570
I can't do that, man.
I said yes to him already.
40
00:01:58,610 --> 00:01:59,990
Oh, did you? Jeez,
I don't want to make things
41
00:02:00,030 --> 00:02:02,740
awkward for you when you
borrow a cup of sugar.
42
00:02:02,780 --> 00:02:04,620
DEACON: Come on, man, no reason
to get all weird about it.
43
00:02:04,660 --> 00:02:06,710
I'm not getting weird.
Okay? I'm not weird at all.
44
00:02:06,750 --> 00:02:08,960
This is probably the least weird
I've ever been.
45
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:10,790
I gotta say, guy,
you're acting a little weird.
46
00:02:10,830 --> 00:02:13,170
Hey, Barry Manilow,
shut up.
47
00:02:13,210 --> 00:02:16,550
Yes, that's who you look like.
It's been driving me crazy.
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00:02:18,050 --> 00:02:21,140
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]
49
00:02:27,930 --> 00:02:29,230
[KNOCKS ON GLASS]
50
00:02:29,270 --> 00:02:31,940
CARRIE: Oh, hey, Hol.
51
00:02:31,980 --> 00:02:34,110
[KNOCKS ON GLASS]
52
00:02:37,860 --> 00:02:39,200
Imagine running into you, like--
53
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,110
How crazy is that?
54
00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:43,070
Uh... well, we both live
2 blocks from here,
55
00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:45,200
so I wouldn't callRipley's.
You know what I'm saying?
56
00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:48,200
Yeah. So, this is where
you get your nails done?
57
00:02:48,250 --> 00:02:50,000
Yeah.
Where do you go?
58
00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,040
Oh, I don't.
59
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:52,380
I'm a bit of a biter.
Obviously,
60
00:02:52,420 --> 00:02:54,920
for the special occasion,
I'll polish the nubs.
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00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:57,630
Whoa! Looks like you took
some finger off with that one.
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00:02:57,670 --> 00:03:00,760
I learned a lesson there.
Never chop celery angry.
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00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:03,680
Nails are pretty gross,
though, huh?
64
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,060
Yeah, listen,
if you want,
65
00:03:05,100 --> 00:03:06,970
I can get you in
with my girl--Sue.
66
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,220
I mean, she could fix
those right up,
67
00:03:08,270 --> 00:03:09,350
and I gotta be
honest with you,
68
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:10,810
it's a little rough
to look at.
69
00:03:10,850 --> 00:03:12,060
That would be great.
Thanks.
70
00:03:12,100 --> 00:03:14,400
Yeah. No problem.
Oh, Connie, hi.
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00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:17,400
Uh, I just need a manicure,
a polish change on my toes,
72
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:18,780
and if Sue could fit
my friend Holly in,
73
00:03:18,820 --> 00:03:20,240
that would be great.
Thanks.
74
00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:22,110
Sorry, she can't
take you anymore.
75
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,030
What?
76
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:26,830
Not take you anymore.
You're not on list.
77
00:03:26,870 --> 00:03:27,910
What list?
78
00:03:27,950 --> 00:03:30,410
-[TELEPHONE RINGS]
-Excuse me.
79
00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:33,040
[CHEERFULLY]
Pretty Nails.
80
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:34,330
Uh, Sue?
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00:03:34,380 --> 00:03:36,170
-Hi, Carrie.
-Hey, listen, I think Connie's
82
00:03:36,210 --> 00:03:38,800
been sniffing
the polish remover.
83
00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:40,010
She said you can't
take me anymore
84
00:03:40,050 --> 00:03:41,930
because I'm not
on some list?
85
00:03:41,970 --> 00:03:43,340
Oh, yes, I've been
cutting back on my hours
86
00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:46,100
because I just found out
that I'm pregnant.
87
00:03:46,140 --> 00:03:49,390
You're gonna have a baby?
That's great!
88
00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:52,850
And I'm not
on the list because...
89
00:03:52,890 --> 00:03:54,690
It's nothing personal.
It's just that
90
00:03:54,730 --> 00:03:56,110
I have so many
wonderful clients,
91
00:03:56,150 --> 00:03:57,900
and I had to choose just by
who's been coming to me
92
00:03:57,940 --> 00:03:59,360
the longest.
93
00:03:59,400 --> 00:04:02,360
Right.
Here's the thing, Sue.
94
00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:04,280
Nobody does my nails
like you do.
95
00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:05,950
So why don't
we just take the list,
96
00:04:05,990 --> 00:04:07,450
a little white-out,
do the thing with the thing,
97
00:04:07,490 --> 00:04:10,290
and I've been coming here
for 30 years.
98
00:04:10,330 --> 00:04:13,080
Look, I promise
if anything opens up,
99
00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,330
you'll be
the first one I call.
100
00:04:14,370 --> 00:04:16,130
CARRIE: Okay, all right.
Well, thanks.
101
00:04:16,170 --> 00:04:19,000
Oh, and you have
a very talented mama.
102
00:04:20,840 --> 00:04:23,340
Sorry, Hol,
we're out of luck.
103
00:04:23,380 --> 00:04:26,010
Hey, Sue can
take you anytime,
104
00:04:26,050 --> 00:04:27,390
but don't tell that one.
105
00:04:32,850 --> 00:04:35,230
SPENCE: Ooh. A lot
of celebrities here tonight.
106
00:04:35,270 --> 00:04:37,310
Oh, Spike Lee.
107
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:40,730
Huh. Likes
his cotton candy.
108
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:42,780
Hey, do you mind
if I sat there
109
00:04:42,820 --> 00:04:44,280
so I can be
with my friends?
110
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:46,200
You sold me
this seat. F-8.
111
00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:47,490
Yeah, I know.
I had 4 tickets,
112
00:04:47,530 --> 00:04:48,910
I just gave you
one randomly.
113
00:04:48,950 --> 00:04:50,370
I didn't think it
would make a difference.
114
00:04:50,410 --> 00:04:52,790
I'm F-8.
115
00:04:52,830 --> 00:04:54,160
That's agreed upon.
It's just--
116
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:55,710
hey, you know, maybe
if I give you my ticket,
117
00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:57,000
you'll be F-9
and I'll be F-8.
118
00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,420
-I'm F-8.
-And backing off.
119
00:05:01,050 --> 00:05:02,840
Hey, there's Deac!
120
00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:05,340
Oh, yeah?
121
00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:07,970
Yeah. That must
be his friend James.
122
00:05:08,010 --> 00:05:09,180
[WHISPERS]
He's black.
123
00:05:09,220 --> 00:05:10,390
Hey, hey, let me
take a look.
124
00:05:10,430 --> 00:05:12,810
Hey, you're just
getting over pink eye.
125
00:05:12,850 --> 00:05:14,060
Yeah? Well, who do you think
gave it to me?
126
00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:15,520
Who said you could
use my towel?
127
00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:16,850
Would you guys
just shut up, okay?
128
00:05:16,900 --> 00:05:18,810
You're giving me
and F-8 a headache.
129
00:05:25,110 --> 00:05:27,240
[BOTH LAUGHING]
130
00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:39,000
How's it going,
amigo?
131
00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:42,250
Yeah.
132
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:44,210
You realize your face
is burnt off?
133
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:45,800
It's a chemical peel,
all right?
134
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:47,840
I realized if I'm gonna
have killer hair,
135
00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:48,970
I might as well
have a killer face
136
00:05:49,010 --> 00:05:50,180
to go along with it.
137
00:05:50,220 --> 00:05:52,180
Mission accomplished.
138
00:05:53,260 --> 00:05:54,850
Anyway,
Deac left a message.
139
00:05:54,890 --> 00:05:57,020
He's, uh, helping
his grandmother move today,
140
00:05:57,060 --> 00:05:58,230
so he's not coming.
141
00:05:58,270 --> 00:05:59,350
Really?
We just saw him--
142
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:02,150
Danny.
143
00:06:02,190 --> 00:06:04,570
What's going on?
144
00:06:04,610 --> 00:06:06,900
Well,
he may have told you
145
00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:08,910
he was "helping
his grandmother move,"
146
00:06:08,950 --> 00:06:11,830
but we were driving
by the Cineplex earlier,
147
00:06:11,870 --> 00:06:13,870
and we saw him
standing in line
148
00:06:13,910 --> 00:06:15,870
with you know who.
149
00:06:15,910 --> 00:06:17,410
I don't believe this.
He's been blowing us off
150
00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:19,920
-all week for this guy.
-Okay. Don't get angry at him.
151
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,000
You know, if you think about it,
it makes perfect sense.
152
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:23,420
What?
153
00:06:23,460 --> 00:06:27,470
This James guy might satisfy
certain, uh, needs
154
00:06:27,510 --> 00:06:29,130
that we can't.
155
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:32,010
-Like what?
-His needs, his urges
156
00:06:32,050 --> 00:06:36,350
to be around other people
who are...black.
157
00:06:36,390 --> 00:06:38,940
Look, I've been friends
with Deac for 10 years.
158
00:06:38,980 --> 00:06:41,100
He never said anything
about having black needs.
159
00:06:41,150 --> 00:06:42,610
It's not something
you talk about.
160
00:06:42,650 --> 00:06:43,940
I mean, I don't talk
about my need
161
00:06:43,980 --> 00:06:45,940
to be around
other Albanians.
162
00:06:45,980 --> 00:06:47,280
You're Albanian?
163
00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:49,240
Yes, and I have a lot
of Albanian friends,
164
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:50,410
and that's nothing
you need to be
165
00:06:50,450 --> 00:06:51,450
threatened by, okay?
166
00:06:51,490 --> 00:06:54,910
Ti je vellai im,caredo besim,
167
00:06:54,950 --> 00:06:56,200
which is Albanian for,
168
00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:58,910
"You are my brother,
whatever your creed."
169
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:00,040
Wow.
How do your people say,
170
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:01,540
-"shut mouth now"?
-Okay.
171
00:07:01,580 --> 00:07:03,880
I'm trying to help you
understand him.
172
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:05,300
I understand fine,
all right?
173
00:07:05,340 --> 00:07:06,460
I'm Deacon's best friend,
174
00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:07,920
and he doesn't
have any needs or urges
175
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,840
that I
can't take care of.
176
00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:11,260
Yeah, I said it.
177
00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:20,190
[LOCKER CLOSES]
178
00:07:20,230 --> 00:07:21,440
What's going on there,
my brother?
179
00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:22,980
Hey, Doug.
180
00:07:23,020 --> 00:07:24,560
Did you happen to catch
that special last night
181
00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:26,360
they had on Malcolm X?
182
00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:27,650
Nope.
183
00:07:27,690 --> 00:07:30,990
Powerful stuff, man.
Powerful stuff.
184
00:07:31,030 --> 00:07:33,490
Damn, I got 3 deliveries
in Jersey today.
185
00:07:33,530 --> 00:07:35,160
Yeah, it was pretty wild.
They were comparing him
186
00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:36,490
to Martin Luther King,
another great
187
00:07:36,530 --> 00:07:37,490
civil rights leader.
188
00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:39,000
Turns out
the two of them
189
00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:42,210
had some pretty
different ideas.
190
00:07:42,250 --> 00:07:44,040
So I've heard.
191
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:47,050
DOUG: One was very non-violent,
that would be your Dr. King,
192
00:07:47,090 --> 00:07:50,300
a great man who gave us
a great day off.
193
00:07:52,090 --> 00:07:53,550
What's going on?
194
00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:55,350
I'm just talking
a little black history.
195
00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:57,470
You don't even know
white history.
196
00:07:57,510 --> 00:07:59,220
Oh, I'm sorry.
Is that only a topic
197
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,180
you can discuss with
your new friend James?
198
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:02,940
-What?
-Yeah, yeah.
199
00:08:02,980 --> 00:08:04,270
I know what
you did yesterday.
200
00:08:04,310 --> 00:08:05,440
Let me ask you,
did you really
201
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:06,940
help your
grandmother move
202
00:08:06,980 --> 00:08:10,280
or did you and James
go to the movies?
203
00:08:10,320 --> 00:08:12,150
Actually, both.
He helped move my grandma,
204
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,360
and then we caught a movie.
What's the big deal?
205
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:16,320
Why didn't you
ask me to help you?
206
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:17,580
I did ask you last week.
207
00:08:17,620 --> 00:08:19,410
You said
it wasn't your "thang."
208
00:08:21,580 --> 00:08:24,210
Do you
get black urges?
209
00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:26,420
I gotta go to Jersey.
210
00:08:42,060 --> 00:08:44,390
DEACON: *Throw your hands up,throw your hands up*
211
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:46,310
*Throw your hands up,throw your hands up*
212
00:08:46,350 --> 00:08:48,230
*Y'all gonna make melose my mind*
213
00:08:48,270 --> 00:08:50,730
ALL: *Up in here,up in here*
214
00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:53,070
DEACON: *Y'all gonna make mego all out*
215
00:08:53,110 --> 00:08:55,320
ALL: *Up in here,up in here*
216
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,700
*Y'all gonnamake me act a fool*
217
00:08:57,740 --> 00:09:01,120
*Up in here,up in here*
218
00:09:07,290 --> 00:09:09,380
MAN: Ha ha ha!
219
00:09:16,340 --> 00:09:17,760
Yeah. Most definitely.
Most definitely.
220
00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:19,100
And tell me this,
221
00:09:19,140 --> 00:09:20,470
why is there
a liquor store
222
00:09:20,510 --> 00:09:23,350
on every corner
in our neighborhoods?
223
00:09:23,390 --> 00:09:25,600
Oh, yes.
Yes, my brother.
224
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,980
That is how the white man
keeps us under his boot.
225
00:09:28,020 --> 00:09:30,020
MAN: Oh, most definitely.
That's right.
226
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,110
Yeah, you know
what the white man
227
00:09:31,150 --> 00:09:33,400
should be giving you?
228
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:36,200
Some reperay-shee-owns.
229
00:09:39,820 --> 00:09:43,410
[LAUGHS] And then
the lord said,
230
00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,710
"Fish don't fry
in the kitchen!"
231
00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:47,330
-CHURCH MEMBER: Say it loud!
-He said,
232
00:09:47,370 --> 00:09:49,420
"Beans
don't burn on the grill!"
233
00:09:49,460 --> 00:09:50,630
No, preacher,
they don't!
234
00:09:50,670 --> 00:09:52,670
It took
a whole lot of trying...
235
00:09:52,710 --> 00:09:54,050
Oh, yes, oh, yes.
236
00:09:54,090 --> 00:09:56,800
...just to get up
that hill.
237
00:09:56,840 --> 00:09:59,680
*Now we're upin the big leagues*
238
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:02,310
*Getting our turn at bat*
239
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:04,470
*As long as we live,it's you and me, baby*
240
00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:07,560
*There ain't nothingwrong with that*
241
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:09,690
-*Now we're moving on up*
-*Moving on up*
242
00:10:09,730 --> 00:10:12,730
-*To the east side*
-*Moving on up*
243
00:10:12,770 --> 00:10:18,150
*To a deluxe apartmentin the sky*
244
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:21,160
*Yeah, oh, yeah*
245
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:22,530
Who let this man
in here?
246
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,450
Have mercy!
247
00:10:24,490 --> 00:10:26,080
You don't
belong in here.
248
00:10:26,830 --> 00:10:29,040
You don't
belong in here.
249
00:10:30,290 --> 00:10:33,130
You don't
belong here.
250
00:10:33,170 --> 00:10:36,550
Let it go, Doug.
You're white.
251
00:10:36,590 --> 00:10:38,720
And that's cool,
man.
252
00:10:58,820 --> 00:11:00,160
Oh, hey, Hol.
253
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:02,700
Hey, Carrie, I didn't know
you were home.
254
00:11:02,740 --> 00:11:04,990
CARRIE: Yeah, well, I may never
leave the house again.
255
00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:07,160
I was just dropping off
your dad's bill.
256
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,080
Oh, all right. I'll just
give you the cash right now.
257
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:10,790
No, no. You can just go ahead
and mail me a check.
258
00:11:10,830 --> 00:11:12,580
You know, I don't feel
comfortable carrying around
259
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:13,920
all that cash.
260
00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:15,500
It's $15, Hol.
261
00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:17,130
Roll the dice.
262
00:11:17,170 --> 00:11:18,260
Just grab it
out of my purse,
263
00:11:18,300 --> 00:11:20,630
'cause I--
my nails are wet.
264
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,140
-Oh, sure, yeah.
-Thanks.
265
00:11:25,220 --> 00:11:26,930
Um...
266
00:11:26,970 --> 00:11:28,600
what are you doing?
267
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:32,480
Um, I'm trying not to be
so dependent on my fingers.
268
00:11:33,690 --> 00:11:36,610
Did you just
get a manicure?
269
00:11:36,650 --> 00:11:38,650
Gosh, did I? Um...
270
00:11:38,690 --> 00:11:40,820
CARRIE: Oh, let me see.
They look gorgeous.
271
00:11:40,860 --> 00:11:42,780
Wow. Why are
your hands shaking?
272
00:11:42,820 --> 00:11:45,490
I ran out of beer
this morning.
273
00:11:45,530 --> 00:11:48,700
-Oh, my God. Did Sue do these?
-I told her not to!
274
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,040
CARRIE: Well, how'd you
get in with her?
275
00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,210
I mean, what about the list?
How'd you get on it?
276
00:11:52,250 --> 00:11:54,750
There is no list,
Carrie.
277
00:11:54,790 --> 00:11:56,630
-What?
-She just made that up
278
00:11:56,670 --> 00:11:58,800
so that she wouldn't
have to do your nails.
279
00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,760
[SCOFFS] Why?
280
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:03,130
She--she says
you're too demanding.
281
00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:04,640
Oh, yeah, okay.
282
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:05,970
I'm too demanding.
Right.
283
00:12:06,010 --> 00:12:07,810
You think I'm too demanding?
Do ya?
284
00:12:07,850 --> 00:12:09,850
-No?
-Oh, yes, you do.
285
00:12:09,890 --> 00:12:11,100
What else did she say?
286
00:12:11,140 --> 00:12:12,310
Well, sh-she said
often, you know,
287
00:12:12,350 --> 00:12:14,020
that you're--
you're late,
288
00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:16,270
and that you, um, tend
to steal the magazines.
289
00:12:16,310 --> 00:12:18,110
CARRIE: Oh, okay.
290
00:12:18,150 --> 00:12:20,820
Like I need this week's issue
of KoreanPeople.
291
00:12:20,860 --> 00:12:22,740
Yeah. All right.
292
00:12:22,780 --> 00:12:24,200
Okay, maybe I'll just
take my money and go.
293
00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:25,820
You know what?
I'll just send you the check.
294
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:27,620
-HOLLY: Okay.
-Yeah.
295
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:35,670
I had a dream.
296
00:12:35,710 --> 00:12:37,040
Okay, look, enough with
the black stuff, man.
297
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,340
-DOUG: No, no, really.
-DEACON: Look,
298
00:12:38,380 --> 00:12:39,920
James is coming by
in a few minutes.
299
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:41,170
Just try and keep it
together, will you?
300
00:12:41,210 --> 00:12:42,670
DOUG: It's okay. Look,
at first I was upset
301
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:44,050
because, I mean,
you were hanging out with James
302
00:12:44,090 --> 00:12:45,760
-all the time.
-All right, listen,
303
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,140
I know I haven't
been around much, but, look,
304
00:12:47,180 --> 00:12:48,680
me and James
got a lot in common, and--
305
00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,060
DOUG: No, it's okay!
That's what I'm saying!
306
00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,930
Look, I get it now.
307
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:54,270
Look, I've been acting
like an idiot, and...
308
00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:55,690
I'm sorry.
309
00:12:55,730 --> 00:12:57,770
All right.
Then we're cool.
310
00:12:57,810 --> 00:12:58,940
Yeah.
311
00:12:58,980 --> 00:13:00,730
JAMES: Hey, Deac.
You ready?
312
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,690
Yeah. Oh, and by the way,
this is my friend Doug.
313
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:03,950
Uh, James Robinson.
314
00:13:03,990 --> 00:13:04,990
JAMES: Hey, good
to meet you.
315
00:13:05,030 --> 00:13:06,320
Good
to meet you.
316
00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:07,950
DEACON: Uh, I'll be back
in a couple of seconds.
317
00:13:07,990 --> 00:13:09,280
I gotta drop off
my route sheet.
318
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:10,790
All right.
319
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:23,090
S-so, how do you like
delivering for Sparkletts?
320
00:13:23,130 --> 00:13:24,630
Ah, it's good.
I can't complain.
321
00:13:24,670 --> 00:13:26,300
I deliver to 3 different
pizza places,
322
00:13:26,340 --> 00:13:29,180
and I like my cheese.
323
00:13:29,220 --> 00:13:31,060
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
324
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:33,890
So, you, uh--you guys going out
to a jazz club tonight?
325
00:13:33,930 --> 00:13:36,020
Jazz? Jazz blows.
326
00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:37,350
Yeah, I'm more
into, like, classic rock.
327
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,150
You know,
Aerosmith, Van Halen.
328
00:13:39,190 --> 00:13:41,150
I'm kind of on an Eddie Money
kick right now.
329
00:13:41,190 --> 00:13:43,690
I love Eddie Money.
330
00:13:44,860 --> 00:13:46,780
Anyway, we're actually
heading up to Regan's.
331
00:13:46,820 --> 00:13:48,410
They've got a wing-eating
contest tonight.
332
00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:50,620
Somebody broke
my record, so...
333
00:13:50,660 --> 00:13:51,950
gotta win my belt back.
334
00:13:51,990 --> 00:13:53,410
Speaking of which,
I'm gonna hit the restroom.
335
00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:55,620
I gotta change
into my eating clothes.
336
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,170
I have eating clothes.
337
00:13:59,210 --> 00:14:00,920
Wh-what's going on?
338
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:03,130
-What are you talking about?
-James remind you of anybody?
339
00:14:03,170 --> 00:14:04,800
I don't know. Uh...
340
00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:07,260
Kirby Puckett?
341
00:14:07,300 --> 00:14:08,760
Let me give you
a few clues, okay?
342
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:10,760
He's a driver
who likes his cheese,
343
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:13,770
hates jazz, and is a former
wing-eating champion.
344
00:14:13,810 --> 00:14:16,810
You went out and
got yourself a black Doug!
345
00:14:16,850 --> 00:14:19,650
-What?
-Look, I had no problem
346
00:14:19,690 --> 00:14:20,900
when you were out there
trying to take care
347
00:14:20,940 --> 00:14:22,650
of your black needs,
but this guy isn't
348
00:14:22,690 --> 00:14:24,730
giving you anything
that I can't give you!
349
00:14:24,780 --> 00:14:26,070
Oh, I see.
350
00:14:26,110 --> 00:14:28,320
So if me and James
were out drinking Cristal
351
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,280
and break dancing,
you'd be okay with that.
352
00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:32,160
Absolutely.
353
00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:33,790
You know what?
I am so sorry.
354
00:14:33,830 --> 00:14:35,160
From now on,
I'll run my friends by you
355
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,410
to make sure
they're black enough.
356
00:14:36,450 --> 00:14:37,870
Hey, hey, come here.
I was just trying
357
00:14:37,910 --> 00:14:39,080
to have a heart-to-heart.
You're the one
358
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:40,790
who made it ugly!
359
00:14:40,830 --> 00:14:44,050
Fine! I'll go to the Foxy Brown
film festival by myself!
360
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:51,010
Oh, please,
we don't want no trouble.
361
00:14:51,050 --> 00:14:53,390
No, no, no.
No trouble.
362
00:14:53,430 --> 00:14:55,180
-Hey, Sue.
-Oh, hi, Carrie.
363
00:14:55,220 --> 00:14:57,140
No cancellations yet,
but I'll call you.
364
00:14:57,180 --> 00:14:58,690
Yeah, listen,
you can cut the act.
365
00:14:58,730 --> 00:15:00,100
I already
talked to Holly.
366
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:01,770
-Oh.
-CARRIE: Yeah. The thing is,
367
00:15:01,810 --> 00:15:03,400
I've been doing a lot
of thinking, and you're right.
368
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:06,480
I can be too demanding,
inconsiderate, and rude.
369
00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:08,150
[LAUGHS]
370
00:15:08,190 --> 00:15:11,200
The bottom line is, um,
I can be somewhat of a, um--
371
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:13,120
what's your people's
word for "bitch"?
372
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,950
Around here
we say "Carrie."
373
00:15:17,370 --> 00:15:20,040
That's a good one.
Ouch. [LAUGHS]
374
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:21,250
anyway, from now on,
375
00:15:21,290 --> 00:15:22,960
I will just come in,
pick my color,
376
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,300
read mypeople,
and keep my yap shut. [LAUGHS]
377
00:15:25,340 --> 00:15:27,170
Oh, and here, I got you
a bunch of rattles
378
00:15:27,210 --> 00:15:29,010
and crap for your
new bundle of joy.
379
00:15:29,050 --> 00:15:30,260
Oh, how sweet.
380
00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:32,510
-CARRIE: Yeah. So I'm back in?
-No.
381
00:15:32,550 --> 00:15:35,010
What do you mean, no?
I just apologized.
382
00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:37,100
I brought you a beautiful
gift for the baby.
383
00:15:37,140 --> 00:15:40,390
Yeah, about me
being pregnant...
384
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,230
-I--
-You made up a baby?
385
00:15:44,150 --> 00:15:45,480
You're very difficult!
386
00:15:45,520 --> 00:15:48,940
Oh. Okay, Sue, you know what?
That's fine.
387
00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:51,860
There are 10 other nail salons
on this block alone,
388
00:15:51,910 --> 00:15:54,030
salons that would be
happy to have me, okay?
389
00:15:54,070 --> 00:15:56,740
So,sayonarato you
and your fake baby.
390
00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:08,300
May?
391
00:16:08,340 --> 00:16:11,260
[SPEAKING KOREAN]
392
00:16:11,300 --> 00:16:13,430
Carrie Heffernan.
393
00:16:14,930 --> 00:16:16,300
Hi.
394
00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:18,560
Do you have someone available?
I just need a manicure.
395
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,930
-Name?
-Carrie Heffernan.
396
00:16:21,980 --> 00:16:24,270
No. We
can't take you.
397
00:16:24,310 --> 00:16:26,020
-What?
-Can't take you!
398
00:16:26,060 --> 00:16:27,770
CARRIE: Okay!
399
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:33,450
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
400
00:17:36,590 --> 00:17:38,390
Hey, what--what
are you doing here?
401
00:17:38,430 --> 00:17:40,220
Signed up
for the contest.
402
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:41,470
-What?
-Pretty sure it's open
403
00:17:41,510 --> 00:17:42,520
to anybody.
404
00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:43,980
Uh, I didn't
see any signs
405
00:17:44,020 --> 00:17:46,900
that said
"No White Dougs allowed."
406
00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:50,360
All right, gentlemen,
to your wings.
407
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,280
You'll have 12 minutes to eat
as many wings as you can,
408
00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:56,200
and per competitive
eating association rules,
409
00:17:56,240 --> 00:17:59,200
throw up,
you're thrown out.
410
00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:01,280
On your mark...
411
00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:04,120
get set...
412
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:05,540
eat!
413
00:18:09,170 --> 00:18:11,290
[ALL SHOUTING ENCOURAGEMENT]
414
00:18:13,630 --> 00:18:15,050
Ohh!
415
00:18:22,430 --> 00:18:24,560
[ALL CHANTING AND CLAPPING]
416
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:35,610
HOST: Down goes Robinson!
It's over!
417
00:18:35,650 --> 00:18:37,950
The winner,
Doug Heffernan!
418
00:18:37,990 --> 00:18:39,360
Yeah!
419
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:40,450
Whoo!
420
00:18:40,490 --> 00:18:41,530
[ALL CLAPPING]
421
00:18:41,570 --> 00:18:44,160
-MAN: Yeah.
-DOUG: All right,
422
00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:45,410
why don't you, uh,
say good-bye to James,
423
00:18:45,450 --> 00:18:47,120
and you and me
will get out of here.
424
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:48,540
-What?
-I won.
425
00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:50,380
I beat him.
You're back with me now.
426
00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:52,920
[CHUCKLES]
I'm not goin' with you.
427
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:54,170
What are you
talkin' about?
428
00:18:54,210 --> 00:18:55,630
What, you think
I pick my friends
429
00:18:55,670 --> 00:18:56,970
by who eats
the most chicken wings?
430
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,380
[LAUGHING]
That's silly.
431
00:18:59,430 --> 00:19:01,260
Look, man, I--I don't know
how you pick your friends,
432
00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:04,140
but all I'm saying is I just ate
200 chicken wings for you.
433
00:19:04,180 --> 00:19:05,560
Yeah, and let me tell you
something. I don't think
434
00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:07,560
you would do that for me,
and I gotta tell ya,
435
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,560
-that hurts, you know?
-Come on. Doug, man, come on.
436
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,270
I don't understand why
you're getting all crazy here.
437
00:19:11,310 --> 00:19:13,360
Because we're supposed
to be best friends, that's why.
438
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:16,230
We are.
That hasn't changed.
439
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,360
You just gotta learn
how to chill out a little.
440
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:23,950
[SIGHS]
441
00:19:23,990 --> 00:19:26,580
I like your belt.
442
00:19:26,620 --> 00:19:28,660
Actually,
it's a replica.
443
00:19:28,710 --> 00:19:30,540
They keep the real one
in Cleveland.
444
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,460
You, uh...
445
00:19:34,500 --> 00:19:35,630
going out with James
now, or...
446
00:19:35,670 --> 00:19:37,090
'cause I was
thinking about,
447
00:19:37,130 --> 00:19:39,090
I don't know, grabbin'
some dessert.
448
00:19:39,130 --> 00:19:40,680
Dessert?
449
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:42,550
You just ate 10 pounds
of chicken wings.
450
00:19:42,590 --> 00:19:43,680
Yeah.
451
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:45,640
I need a little
something sweet.
452
00:19:52,940 --> 00:19:54,940
-*Ooh-ooh, ooh*
-*Beans don't burn
453
00:19:54,980 --> 00:19:56,900
-*On the grill*
-*Ooh-ooh, ooh*
454
00:19:56,940 --> 00:19:59,490
*Took a whole lotof tee-ryin'*
455
00:19:59,530 --> 00:20:02,410
-*Just to get up that hill*
-*Ooh-ooh, ooh*
456
00:20:02,450 --> 00:20:04,570
*Now we're upin the big leagues*
457
00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:06,830
-*Ooh-ooh, ooh*
-*Gettin' our turn at bat*
458
00:20:06,870 --> 00:20:08,790
-*Ooh-ooh, ooh*
-*As long as we live*
459
00:20:08,830 --> 00:20:10,620
*It's you and me, baby*
460
00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:12,710
*There ain't nothin'wrong with that*
461
00:20:12,750 --> 00:20:15,000
-*Well, we're movin' on up*
-*Movin' on up*
462
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:18,130
-*To the east side*
-*Movin' on up*
463
00:20:18,170 --> 00:20:21,550
-*To a deluxe apartment*
-*Ahh...*
464
00:20:21,590 --> 00:20:23,510
*In the sky*
465
00:20:23,550 --> 00:20:26,510
-*Yeah, we're movin' on up*
-*Movin' on up*
466
00:20:26,550 --> 00:20:29,810
-*To the east side*
-*Movin' on up*
467
00:20:29,850 --> 00:20:32,600
*We finally got a piece*
468
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:36,980
*Of the pie*
469
00:20:40,570 --> 00:20:42,740
-Whoo!
-Whoo!
470
00:20:42,780 --> 00:20:45,910
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
34301
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