All language subtitles for The King of Queens (2005) - S07E08 - Awed Couple_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian Download
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:05,540 [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:00:07,750 --> 00:00:11,170 Hey, honey. What are you doing? 3 00:00:11,210 --> 00:00:13,050 Coloring. 4 00:00:13,090 --> 00:00:14,430 Gotta be honest with you. 5 00:00:14,470 --> 00:00:17,180 A little disturbing. 6 00:00:17,220 --> 00:00:18,220 Kirby left them. 7 00:00:18,260 --> 00:00:20,470 It's actually pretty relaxing. 8 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,060 Is that so? 9 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:24,270 Yeah. You should try it. 10 00:00:24,310 --> 00:00:28,690 It may take the edge off during your "lady time." 11 00:00:28,730 --> 00:00:31,070 Well, thank you for the tip, but you have your little fun, 12 00:00:31,110 --> 00:00:32,280 and then maybe later 13 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:33,740 you can climb up into your tree house 14 00:00:33,780 --> 00:00:36,360 and I'll bring you a juice box. 15 00:00:36,410 --> 00:00:37,870 Make your jokes, but... 16 00:00:37,910 --> 00:00:39,580 you don't know what you're missing. 17 00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:46,750 Okay, I want in. 18 00:00:58,260 --> 00:00:59,800 Give me the orange one. 19 00:00:59,850 --> 00:01:01,430 No, I'm using it. 20 00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:05,390 -No, you're not. -I will be in a second. 21 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:08,230 Doug, I have a bunny here with a carrot. 22 00:01:08,270 --> 00:01:10,770 -So? -So I need the orange one. 23 00:01:10,820 --> 00:01:13,110 So, use brown. Give the bunny a cigar! 24 00:01:14,150 --> 00:01:15,570 No. I need it! 25 00:01:15,610 --> 00:01:17,410 -Tough! -Doug, give it to me. 26 00:01:17,450 --> 00:01:18,450 No. No! 27 00:01:18,490 --> 00:01:19,700 Oh, my God, give it to me. 28 00:01:19,740 --> 00:01:22,240 -No! -Give it to me. Dad! 29 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:25,120 You're such a baby! You're such a baby! 30 00:01:29,330 --> 00:01:32,590 SINGER: * My eyes are gettin' weary* 31 00:01:32,630 --> 00:01:35,300 * My back is gettin' tight* 32 00:01:35,340 --> 00:01:37,220 * I'm sittin' here in traffic* 33 00:01:37,260 --> 00:01:40,260 * On the Queensboro Bridge tonight* 34 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:45,600 * But I don't care, 'cause all I want to do* 35 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:51,400 * Is cash my check and drive right home to you* 36 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:52,940 * 'Cause, baby, all my life* 37 00:01:52,980 --> 00:01:57,490 * I will be drivin' home to you* 38 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:05,700 CARRIE: So, how have you guys been? 39 00:02:05,750 --> 00:02:07,870 I feel like I haven't seen you in, like, forever. 40 00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:10,170 You know, good. Busy with the kids, 41 00:02:10,210 --> 00:02:12,000 school, play dates. 42 00:02:12,040 --> 00:02:13,800 Kirby's got his baton-twirling class. 43 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:15,760 Mm-hmm. 44 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,170 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 45 00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:20,050 I miss our regular Saturday night thing. 46 00:02:20,090 --> 00:02:22,720 You know, we've got to get that thing back up and running again. 47 00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:24,180 -How 'bout next Saturday? -Yeah. 48 00:02:24,220 --> 00:02:25,640 Yeah, um... 49 00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:27,100 that's actually not real good for us. 50 00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:29,020 CARRIE: All right, so we'll do it the next Saturday. 51 00:02:29,060 --> 00:02:30,350 Dinner and a movie? 52 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:32,770 You know, that's not gonna work for us, either. 53 00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:37,030 Okay, did we do something to tick you guys off? 54 00:02:37,070 --> 00:02:38,780 Was it because we smiled when you told us 55 00:02:38,820 --> 00:02:42,370 about Kirby's baton-twirling classes? 56 00:02:42,410 --> 00:02:46,120 DOUG: 'Cause we were smiling like "That's awesome!" 57 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:47,910 Look, it's not you. 58 00:02:47,950 --> 00:02:50,580 It's just, uh... 59 00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:52,080 we met another couple. 60 00:02:54,170 --> 00:02:55,800 [SOFTLY] What? 61 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:57,590 DEACON: The thing is that they live in our building. 62 00:02:57,630 --> 00:02:58,920 The kids are the same age. 63 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,680 Saturday afternoon the kids play together, 64 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:01,840 then at night we all hang out 65 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:03,220 and we don't have to get a sitter. 66 00:03:03,260 --> 00:03:04,930 It's kind of become a regular thing. 67 00:03:04,970 --> 00:03:07,060 KELLY: We didn't mean for this to happen. It just... 68 00:03:07,100 --> 00:03:08,890 -did. -DOUG: All right. Hey, man, 69 00:03:08,930 --> 00:03:10,100 good for you guys. 70 00:03:10,140 --> 00:03:12,230 Yeah. I mean, they got kids, you got kids. 71 00:03:12,270 --> 00:03:13,610 DEACON: We could still hang out. 72 00:03:13,650 --> 00:03:15,070 Yeah. We could do brunch. 73 00:03:15,110 --> 00:03:18,360 Whatever. 74 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:21,110 Come on, man. Don't be like that. 75 00:03:21,150 --> 00:03:22,240 Don't worry about us, okay? 76 00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:25,120 -We got tons of friends. -Yeah. Tons. 77 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:26,700 Well, that's good. 78 00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,790 Yeah, it is good. 79 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:33,120 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 80 00:03:36,880 --> 00:03:39,130 I hate Saturday nights. 81 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:45,850 What do you think Deacon and Kelly are doing right now? 82 00:03:45,890 --> 00:03:46,890 -Doug, don't. -I'm just saying 83 00:03:46,930 --> 00:03:48,180 it's been 3 weeks, Carrie. 84 00:03:48,220 --> 00:03:50,810 When does it stop hurting? 85 00:03:50,850 --> 00:03:53,810 I don't know, baby. I don't know. 86 00:03:53,850 --> 00:03:55,810 I can't believe there are no other couples 87 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:57,770 to hang out with. 88 00:03:57,820 --> 00:04:00,150 We could always call Neal and Marcy. 89 00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:02,280 Neal and Marcy. 90 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:03,660 Are you crazy?! 91 00:04:03,700 --> 00:04:05,700 I'm just saying they loved us. 92 00:04:05,740 --> 00:04:06,990 Yeah, too much. They named their cats 93 00:04:07,030 --> 00:04:09,290 after us, for God's sake! 94 00:04:09,330 --> 00:04:11,040 Those cats are dead by now. 95 00:04:11,080 --> 00:04:14,170 At least Carrie is. She got pregnant, like, 30 times. 96 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,170 We are not calling 97 00:04:20,210 --> 00:04:23,220 Neal and Marcy, okay? 98 00:04:23,260 --> 00:04:24,970 Yeah, you're right. 99 00:04:25,010 --> 00:04:26,180 [SIGHS] 100 00:04:26,220 --> 00:04:28,350 -I'm gonna go to bed. -Right behind you. 101 00:04:28,390 --> 00:04:30,680 I'm just gonna clean up here a little bit. 102 00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:31,890 Okay. 103 00:04:43,280 --> 00:04:44,700 DEACON: Hello? 104 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:46,780 Hello? 105 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:50,200 Who is this? 106 00:04:54,370 --> 00:04:55,750 Hello? 107 00:04:57,290 --> 00:05:00,170 What are you doing? 108 00:05:00,210 --> 00:05:01,800 Just checking the time. 109 00:05:01,840 --> 00:05:04,090 7:08. Good job, buddy. 110 00:05:04,130 --> 00:05:06,890 You were calling Deacon and Kelly again. 111 00:05:06,930 --> 00:05:09,140 I just wanted to hear what was going on over there. 112 00:05:09,180 --> 00:05:12,100 Oh, my god, you're pathetic! 113 00:05:12,140 --> 00:05:15,310 What wasgoing on over there? 114 00:05:15,350 --> 00:05:17,350 I don't know, but it sounded 115 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,440 like the best time 4 people ever had. 116 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:20,900 Damn it! 117 00:05:20,940 --> 00:05:22,150 You know what? Screw them! 118 00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:24,490 And screw us for being such losers! 119 00:05:24,530 --> 00:05:26,490 You know what we gotta do? We gotta get off our butts, 120 00:05:26,530 --> 00:05:28,280 get out there and find a replacement couple 121 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,370 for Deacon and Kelly. 122 00:05:30,410 --> 00:05:32,040 I don't know. 123 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:33,120 I don't think we're ready yet. 124 00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:34,540 Of course we're ready. Come on! 125 00:05:34,580 --> 00:05:36,120 We're nice, we're funny, we're smart. 126 00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:38,460 Any other couple would be lucky to have us! 127 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:40,340 You know, you're right. 128 00:05:40,380 --> 00:05:42,800 Who cares what Deacon and Kelly think? 129 00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:44,260 We're a catch! 130 00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:46,340 Yes, we are. So you know what we're gonna do? 131 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:48,130 We're gonna shower, shave, 132 00:05:48,180 --> 00:05:49,390 pop that thing on your lip, 133 00:05:49,430 --> 00:05:51,220 and we're gonna get us a new couple. 134 00:05:51,260 --> 00:05:52,930 Yeah. 135 00:05:53,850 --> 00:05:55,930 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 136 00:05:57,940 --> 00:06:00,150 I just say we cut our losses and go, all right? 137 00:06:00,190 --> 00:06:01,820 This obviously isn't the right store. 138 00:06:01,860 --> 00:06:04,280 Doug, we were just in the wrong department, okay? 139 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,190 You don't meet a lot of nice couples in Lumber. 140 00:06:06,240 --> 00:06:08,030 We know that now. 141 00:06:08,070 --> 00:06:09,200 The paint department. 142 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:12,580 Now, this is a virtual meat market. 143 00:06:12,620 --> 00:06:14,290 All right, well, what are we looking for this time? 144 00:06:14,330 --> 00:06:17,080 I mean, do we necessarily have to go black? 145 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:18,540 Can we go back? 146 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:25,960 I don't care if they're black, white, or purple 147 00:06:26,010 --> 00:06:28,930 as long as they're nice. 148 00:06:28,970 --> 00:06:31,260 Hey. How 'bout them? 149 00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:34,470 CARRIE: Hmm. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 150 00:06:34,510 --> 00:06:36,020 Okay, I'll give them a tumble. 151 00:06:36,060 --> 00:06:37,310 All right. 152 00:06:37,350 --> 00:06:39,350 Let's make our move. It's magic time. 153 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:45,940 Hey, hon, look at that color right there. 154 00:06:45,980 --> 00:06:47,570 Look at that. That is nice, huh? 155 00:06:47,610 --> 00:06:50,070 Oh, yeah, that is nice. 156 00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:53,240 Wow, that Dutch boy knows his way around a can of paint. 157 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:54,410 You know what I'm sayin'? 158 00:06:54,450 --> 00:06:55,950 Yeah. Great variety. 159 00:06:55,990 --> 00:06:57,410 The best. Hey, you guys want to get out of here? 160 00:06:57,450 --> 00:06:59,000 Catch a movie? 161 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:03,960 What? 162 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:05,590 Just grab some dinner. 163 00:07:05,630 --> 00:07:06,920 Maybe go to an Olive garden. 164 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,920 There's one by the theater. 165 00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:11,430 Um, we actually have plans. 166 00:07:11,470 --> 00:07:13,970 Oh. No biggie. Okay. Not a problem. 167 00:07:14,010 --> 00:07:16,220 Take care now. 168 00:07:16,260 --> 00:07:17,390 [CLEARS THROAT] 169 00:07:17,430 --> 00:07:19,180 The walk of shame. 170 00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:20,310 What the hell was that?! 171 00:07:20,350 --> 00:07:22,270 Do you know that you have no rap... 172 00:07:22,310 --> 00:07:23,610 whatsoever? 173 00:07:23,650 --> 00:07:25,190 What? All right. I'm a little out of practice. 174 00:07:25,230 --> 00:07:27,030 But in my defense, they have plans. 175 00:07:27,070 --> 00:07:29,860 Yeah. Plans to get a restraining order. 176 00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:33,240 Oh, hey, hey, hey. 177 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:34,450 Okay, now, 178 00:07:34,490 --> 00:07:37,330 I see some talent over there. 179 00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:40,660 Now this time you just follow my lead. 180 00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:42,330 Okay, but don't invite 'em to the Olive garden. 181 00:07:42,370 --> 00:07:44,380 That's mything. 182 00:07:48,210 --> 00:07:49,630 Carly? Alex? 183 00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:51,880 -No. -Oh, I'm sorry. 184 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,050 You look like friends of ours 185 00:07:53,090 --> 00:07:55,350 from the, um-- from the Dog park. 186 00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:56,470 Oh, you have a dog. 187 00:07:56,510 --> 00:08:00,020 5. 188 00:08:00,060 --> 00:08:01,890 So, do you have a dog? 189 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:02,690 A beagle. 190 00:08:02,730 --> 00:08:05,190 -Oohh. -Oohh. 191 00:08:05,230 --> 00:08:07,110 We're Doug and Carrie, by the way. 192 00:08:07,150 --> 00:08:08,360 Brigitte and Jon. 193 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:09,440 Brigitte?! Oh, my god, 194 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:11,190 that was my mother's name! 195 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,030 Mine, too. 196 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:15,450 Wow. Small world, huh? 197 00:08:15,490 --> 00:08:17,370 Yes. Yes. Heh heh. 198 00:08:17,410 --> 00:08:18,370 Anyway, it was nice meeting you. 199 00:08:18,410 --> 00:08:19,540 -Okay. -You, too. 200 00:08:19,580 --> 00:08:21,410 Okay. [CHUCKLES] 201 00:08:21,450 --> 00:08:23,040 Oh, Doug, did you get 202 00:08:23,080 --> 00:08:25,210 those Norah Jones tickets 203 00:08:25,250 --> 00:08:26,920 for next weekend? 204 00:08:28,420 --> 00:08:29,550 Yes. Yeah, yeah, I did. 205 00:08:29,590 --> 00:08:31,380 -Oh, okay. -Yeah. Norah Jones. 206 00:08:31,420 --> 00:08:32,550 -Yeah, she's great. -Yeah. 207 00:08:32,590 --> 00:08:34,050 You know, we've seen her. 208 00:08:34,090 --> 00:08:35,340 -Oh, yeah? -She is great. 209 00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:37,970 -We love her. -So do our moms. 210 00:08:38,010 --> 00:08:40,140 -They do [INDISTINCT] -Heh heh heh heh heh. 211 00:08:40,180 --> 00:08:42,350 Anyway, here's a crazy thought. 212 00:08:42,390 --> 00:08:43,940 Uh, we have 2 extra tickets 213 00:08:43,980 --> 00:08:46,440 if you guys are interested. 214 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:48,230 -Okay. That sounds like fun. -Yeah. All right. 215 00:08:48,270 --> 00:08:49,940 Well, let me just get your number. 216 00:08:49,980 --> 00:08:52,110 -Great. -We'll call you. 217 00:08:53,490 --> 00:08:55,280 -Here you go. Call us. -I will. 218 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:56,360 Just don't call us after 10:00. 219 00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:57,950 I don't want to wake up the kids. 220 00:08:57,990 --> 00:08:58,950 Oh, right-o. 221 00:08:58,990 --> 00:09:00,620 -Okay. -Bye. 222 00:09:00,660 --> 00:09:02,290 Damn it! Kids! 223 00:09:03,620 --> 00:09:05,500 Well, this has been a huge waste of time. 224 00:09:05,540 --> 00:09:07,040 Well, maybe not. 225 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,500 What about them? 226 00:09:12,130 --> 00:09:13,210 Them? 227 00:09:13,260 --> 00:09:15,260 I mean, are we really that desperate? 228 00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:17,720 P.A.: Attention, shoppers, the store will be closing 229 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:20,350 in 10 minutes. 230 00:09:20,390 --> 00:09:21,720 I can't believe 231 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,520 we went out with them. 232 00:09:23,560 --> 00:09:24,600 [SIGHS] 233 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:26,230 What were we thinking? 234 00:09:26,270 --> 00:09:27,650 I don't know. 235 00:09:27,690 --> 00:09:31,650 The karaoke, the Jell-O shots, the line dancing... 236 00:09:32,650 --> 00:09:35,740 I've never felt so dirty. 237 00:09:35,780 --> 00:09:37,570 Did I really get up there and sing 238 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:40,160 You Don't Bring Me Flowers with Peggy? 239 00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:45,160 Twice. 240 00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,670 And once with her on your shoulders. 241 00:09:52,090 --> 00:09:54,260 I need a shower. 242 00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:57,800 And I need this tattoo to be temporary. 243 00:09:57,840 --> 00:09:59,180 Doug, we can't give up, okay? 244 00:09:59,220 --> 00:10:01,010 We've gotta get back out there. 245 00:10:01,050 --> 00:10:03,180 What the hell is that, a turtle biting an apple? 246 00:10:05,350 --> 00:10:07,810 -I don't know. -Okay, look... 247 00:10:07,850 --> 00:10:09,560 we've hit rock bottom. 248 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:12,570 Now, I'm gonna throw 2 names out at you, okay? Neal and Marcy. 249 00:10:12,610 --> 00:10:14,110 No, no, no, no, no, no. 250 00:10:14,150 --> 00:10:15,570 You were right. They're brutal. 251 00:10:15,610 --> 00:10:17,150 Neal's always making those stupid toasts, 252 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,360 and Marcy's laughing like a mental patient 253 00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:21,570 at everything he says. 254 00:10:21,620 --> 00:10:23,660 Yeah, but we haven't seen them in a long time. 255 00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:25,370 Maybe they've changed. 256 00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:27,500 To us. Not the magazine, 257 00:10:27,540 --> 00:10:29,210 but what the heck, that, too. Right? 258 00:10:29,250 --> 00:10:31,710 NEAL AND MARCY: [LAUGHING] 259 00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:40,890 [LAUGHS] It's so funny. 260 00:10:40,930 --> 00:10:42,970 Neal and I were just talking about you guys, 261 00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,140 and then we got home, and there's your message 262 00:10:45,180 --> 00:10:47,560 -on our machine! -We couldn't believe it was you. 263 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:50,730 We must have listened to it 20 times. 264 00:10:50,770 --> 00:10:53,610 So, what have you guys been up to? 265 00:10:53,650 --> 00:10:54,900 Well, uh, the big news is 266 00:10:54,940 --> 00:10:57,780 Marcy and I have a new addition to the family. 267 00:10:57,820 --> 00:10:59,990 -A baby? -MARCY: [LAUGHS] No. 268 00:11:00,030 --> 00:11:02,200 You know Neal is sterile. 269 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:07,580 Oh, come on, show 'em the picture, honey. 270 00:11:07,620 --> 00:11:09,000 -Oh, yeah. -You have a picture 271 00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:10,830 of Neal being sterile? 272 00:11:10,870 --> 00:11:12,710 [LAUGHS] 273 00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,540 Of course not, silly. 274 00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:16,130 I am silly. 275 00:11:18,630 --> 00:11:19,630 Is that a boat? 276 00:11:19,670 --> 00:11:20,680 NEAL: Yes, it is. 277 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,640 35 feet of seafaring fun! 278 00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:24,930 CARRIE: Whoa, the envelope business 279 00:11:24,970 --> 00:11:26,510 has been good to you, huh? 280 00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:28,890 -NEAL: Well, let's just say... -Oh, Neal, don't. 281 00:11:28,930 --> 00:11:30,940 Envelopes have my stamp of approval. 282 00:11:30,980 --> 00:11:33,100 Ha ha ha! Right? 283 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,650 Oh...yeah. 284 00:11:35,690 --> 00:11:37,570 MARCY: Oh, my God! You have to come out 285 00:11:37,610 --> 00:11:38,780 on the boat with us. 286 00:11:38,820 --> 00:11:40,820 -You must! -Must we? 287 00:11:40,860 --> 00:11:42,820 No, no, no. You see, the thing is-- 288 00:11:42,860 --> 00:11:44,820 MARCY: Oh, honey, look. It's the Koehlers. 289 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:48,500 Hey. Hey, Marc, Renee. Hi, strangers. 290 00:11:48,540 --> 00:11:49,790 Doug, Carrie, this is Marc and Renee. 291 00:11:49,830 --> 00:11:51,040 We were in a book club together 292 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:52,620 about a million years ago. 293 00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,210 Ugh, that book club! 294 00:11:54,250 --> 00:11:55,500 God, what were we thinking? 295 00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:56,840 -That was deadly. -Deadly. 296 00:11:56,880 --> 00:12:00,010 The bottom line is books suck. 297 00:12:00,050 --> 00:12:01,760 Wow. 298 00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:03,680 I'm glad somebody finally had the guts to say it out loud. 299 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,510 MARC: You know what? I'll go you one further than that. 300 00:12:05,550 --> 00:12:07,760 Reading itself-- overrated. 301 00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,680 I mean, God gave us the miracle of television. 302 00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:10,890 Who are we to question his plan? 303 00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:12,520 MARC: Exactly. 304 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:14,690 NEAL: All Marcy and I ever watch is the history channel. 305 00:12:14,730 --> 00:12:16,560 It's very informative. 306 00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:21,150 Anyway... 307 00:12:21,190 --> 00:12:22,650 I love that jacket. 308 00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:24,110 Oh, thanks. I got it at Bloomingdale's. 309 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:25,570 But you know, that sales guy, 310 00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:26,830 he has a real attitude. 311 00:12:26,870 --> 00:12:28,080 If I hadn't wanted this so badly, 312 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,620 I would have fed him his own toupee. 313 00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:32,290 I think I met the same salesman. 314 00:12:32,330 --> 00:12:34,000 I've wanted to smack him myself a few times. 315 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,540 -RENEE: Yeah? -Yeah. 316 00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:36,670 We gotta run. We gotta run. 317 00:12:36,710 --> 00:12:37,960 -It was nice meeting you. -Yeah. 318 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,010 Oh, hey, listen. You gotta try 319 00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:41,090 the rib-eye special. 320 00:12:41,130 --> 00:12:42,550 They wrap it in bacon, 321 00:12:42,590 --> 00:12:44,840 and then they cook it in butter. Oh! 322 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:46,220 I'd eat my own foot if it was wrapped in bacon 323 00:12:46,260 --> 00:12:47,850 and cooked in butter. 324 00:12:47,890 --> 00:12:50,020 -MARC: We'll see you. Bye. -All right. Bye. 325 00:12:50,930 --> 00:12:52,180 So we've gotta figure out 326 00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:53,940 how to get these landlubbers out on the boat. 327 00:12:53,980 --> 00:12:55,190 Oh, we have to. 328 00:12:55,230 --> 00:12:56,730 -NEAL: Yeah. -MARCY: Just haveto. 329 00:12:56,770 --> 00:12:58,570 -NEAL: Well, let's do it. -MARCY: Oh, boy. 330 00:12:58,610 --> 00:13:00,860 -NEAL: Let's put it together. -MARCY: Captain Neal is so cute 331 00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:02,740 -in his hat! -NEAL: It's a good time. 332 00:13:06,950 --> 00:13:09,700 He hates books, Carrie. How great is that?! 333 00:13:09,740 --> 00:13:13,330 CARRIE: I know. And did you see the shoes she was wearing? 334 00:13:13,370 --> 00:13:15,670 -Ja! -CARRIE: Oh! 335 00:13:15,710 --> 00:13:18,920 And we both wanna smack obnoxious salesmen. 336 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,340 Honey, we found them. 337 00:13:20,380 --> 00:13:23,050 We found our couple, baby! 338 00:13:23,090 --> 00:13:24,170 Next Saturday night, 339 00:13:24,220 --> 00:13:26,130 we go out with them. Agreed? 340 00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:28,050 Absolutely agreed. 341 00:13:28,090 --> 00:13:29,720 I never thought going out with Neal and Marcy 342 00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:31,010 -would be a good thing. -I know. 343 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,390 If we never would have gone out with them, 344 00:13:32,430 --> 00:13:36,190 we never would have met, um...um... 345 00:13:37,690 --> 00:13:39,610 oh, my God! 346 00:13:39,650 --> 00:13:41,360 Do you remember their names? 347 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:43,070 Crap. 348 00:13:43,110 --> 00:13:45,030 I want to say... 349 00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:47,110 Helen and Stanley. 350 00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:51,620 Those are The Ropers! 351 00:13:51,660 --> 00:13:53,410 Why didn't you pay attention?! 352 00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:54,870 I was lost in his eyes! 353 00:13:54,910 --> 00:13:56,870 Why didn't you pay attention? 354 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:58,670 Oh, I was lost in her shoes. 355 00:13:58,710 --> 00:14:00,040 [SIGHS] 356 00:14:00,090 --> 00:14:02,670 Well, now what are we gonna do? 357 00:14:02,710 --> 00:14:04,170 I guess we're just gonna have to get their names 358 00:14:04,210 --> 00:14:06,010 from Neal and Marcy. 359 00:14:06,050 --> 00:14:07,760 Oh, sure. I'll just call and say, 360 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:09,930 "Hey, you two sicken us, 361 00:14:09,970 --> 00:14:11,640 but can we get the names and number 362 00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:13,140 of your friends?" 363 00:14:13,180 --> 00:14:15,140 If you think it'll work, I'm on board. 364 00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:21,400 NEAL: Hey, a toast to friends. 365 00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:22,860 Not the show. 366 00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:23,940 What the heck, that, too. 367 00:14:23,980 --> 00:14:25,150 BOTH: [LAUGHING] 368 00:14:25,190 --> 00:14:27,450 -Okay. -Okay. 369 00:14:27,490 --> 00:14:28,910 Oh, Carrie, 370 00:14:28,950 --> 00:14:31,030 that bacon-wrapped rib eye 371 00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,160 was incredible. 372 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,290 Oh, thank you. 373 00:14:34,330 --> 00:14:38,040 I don't know where I got that idea. 374 00:14:38,080 --> 00:14:39,290 I think I do. 375 00:14:39,330 --> 00:14:42,750 God, who was talking about rib eye... 376 00:14:42,790 --> 00:14:45,380 wrapped in bacon recently? 377 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:49,470 It was in Cooper's. 378 00:14:49,510 --> 00:14:50,680 He said, 379 00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:53,760 "Try the rib-eye special." 380 00:14:55,310 --> 00:14:57,310 It was a couple. 381 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,400 There were two of 'em. 382 00:15:06,230 --> 00:15:08,280 CARRIE: Oh, I know! 383 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:11,820 Neal and Marcy's friends from the book club. 384 00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:14,450 Yes! Neal and Marcy's friends from the book club. 385 00:15:14,490 --> 00:15:16,830 Oh, my God! What were their names? 386 00:15:16,870 --> 00:15:18,750 -Marc and Renee. -DOUG: Marc and Renee, 387 00:15:18,790 --> 00:15:19,910 -of course. -Oh, yeah. 388 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,370 Oh, gosh. 389 00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:26,460 What--what ya writing, Car-Car? 390 00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:29,260 Oh, just a shopping list for Costco. 391 00:15:29,300 --> 00:15:32,180 I got to remember to pick up a bag of, um, 392 00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:35,010 Nestle miniatures. Yeah. 393 00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:37,220 Not the miniatures, get the regular size. 394 00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:43,520 So, Marc and Renee. 395 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:45,440 What characters, huh? 396 00:15:45,480 --> 00:15:47,440 Oh, yeah. Yeah. 397 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,030 I, uh, I don't envy Marc 398 00:15:49,070 --> 00:15:51,280 growing up with a last name like that, huh? 399 00:15:51,320 --> 00:15:52,490 Why? 400 00:15:52,530 --> 00:15:53,950 'Cause you know how kids tease. 401 00:15:53,990 --> 00:15:57,080 I mean, they can be merciless, you know. 402 00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:59,500 Especially when they get a name like that. 403 00:15:59,540 --> 00:16:01,000 Koehler? 404 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:02,330 Yeah. 405 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:05,880 You kidding me? 406 00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:08,420 "Koehler, Koehler... 407 00:16:08,460 --> 00:16:11,510 has an impacted molar." 408 00:16:11,550 --> 00:16:13,890 CARRIE: Ha. Yeah. 409 00:16:13,930 --> 00:16:15,050 I'll be right back. 410 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,930 I got to get some more [MUMBLING]. 411 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:21,390 So, Doug, are those curtains new? 412 00:16:21,430 --> 00:16:23,770 [YAWNS] 413 00:16:27,110 --> 00:16:28,190 Sorry about that. 414 00:16:28,230 --> 00:16:29,320 Oh, no, it's okay. 415 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:30,780 I was just wondering if the curtains-- 416 00:16:30,820 --> 00:16:32,950 [YAWNS] 417 00:16:34,990 --> 00:16:36,030 Ohh! 418 00:16:36,070 --> 00:16:37,330 -You all right? -Yeah. 419 00:16:37,370 --> 00:16:39,240 It's just I've been working the late shift 420 00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,790 and tomorrow I got to get up at like 5 A.M. 421 00:16:41,830 --> 00:16:42,870 We don't want to keep you up. 422 00:16:42,910 --> 00:16:46,130 Great! Great. That's great. 423 00:16:46,170 --> 00:16:48,550 Um, okay, well, we should really say good night to-- 424 00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:50,510 [YAWNS] 425 00:16:52,090 --> 00:16:53,430 -Whoo! -Well, you know, we'd love to... 426 00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:55,180 -yeah, I'll tell her. -Have the two of you over. 427 00:16:55,220 --> 00:16:57,140 [YAWNS] 428 00:17:04,850 --> 00:17:06,100 Are they gone? 429 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,270 Yep. I yawned them right into the street. 430 00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:11,030 Doug, the Koehlers aren't listed in the phone book. 431 00:17:11,070 --> 00:17:13,150 -We need them! -Are you kidding me? 432 00:17:13,190 --> 00:17:15,360 No, I'm not kidding you. I wish I were. 433 00:17:15,410 --> 00:17:16,950 Oh, god. They probably got unlisted 434 00:17:16,990 --> 00:17:18,450 because... 435 00:17:18,490 --> 00:17:22,450 Neal and Marcy drove 'em away. 436 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:24,830 They're so crazy. Now what are we gonna do? 437 00:17:24,870 --> 00:17:28,170 I hate them! They ruined our lives! 438 00:17:28,210 --> 00:17:30,960 Now we're never gonna find the Koehlers. 439 00:17:32,300 --> 00:17:33,300 Yeah. 440 00:17:33,340 --> 00:17:35,130 Here we are, 441 00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,590 back on the couch. 442 00:17:39,970 --> 00:17:42,140 Maybe it's not so bad us not finding 443 00:17:42,180 --> 00:17:44,310 another couple to hang out with, you know? 444 00:17:44,350 --> 00:17:47,060 Just the two of us-- is that so terrible? 445 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:48,980 It's like that poem, 446 00:17:49,020 --> 00:17:52,190 "Grow old with me, the best is yet to be." 447 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:03,330 Okay. Come on. 448 00:18:03,370 --> 00:18:05,040 We're looking for an address book, a palm pilot, 449 00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,170 a matchbook with the Koehlers' phone number on it-- 450 00:18:07,210 --> 00:18:08,380 anything. 451 00:18:10,210 --> 00:18:11,630 -Whoop! -CARRIE: What? You got it? 452 00:18:11,670 --> 00:18:15,170 Nope, but somebody's got eczema. 453 00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:16,420 Doug, stop it. 454 00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:18,130 I'm just saying someone's got eczema. 455 00:18:21,140 --> 00:18:24,100 Oh, I got it. I got it. 456 00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:25,430 They're right there. They're coming back. 457 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,230 All right. As soon as we're out on the ocean 458 00:18:27,270 --> 00:18:28,400 and they're busy doing boat crap, 459 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:29,560 let's get that phone number. 460 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:31,480 -Heh heh heh! -Hey! 461 00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:33,150 Let me help you with that. 462 00:18:33,190 --> 00:18:34,360 Hey, where's yours? 463 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,280 Oh, I thought the 4 of us could share this. 464 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:37,530 I was just-- i was just joking, 465 00:18:37,570 --> 00:18:40,280 'cause, you know, I'm fat. 466 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,990 Doug, I care about you too much 467 00:18:42,030 --> 00:18:44,370 to laugh at your health issues. 468 00:18:44,410 --> 00:18:46,040 All right. 469 00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:49,290 Okay, well, let's fire this baby up and get her out to sea. 470 00:18:49,330 --> 00:18:51,420 I want to see you guys in action. 471 00:18:51,460 --> 00:18:53,960 Oh, well, we won't be going out. 472 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,960 Huh? Why not? 473 00:18:56,010 --> 00:18:57,340 Well, Neal failed 474 00:18:57,380 --> 00:18:59,680 his boating license test again. 475 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,300 I don't know what it is. I know all the answers. 476 00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:03,100 I guess I just panic. 477 00:19:03,140 --> 00:19:05,680 But that doesn't mean we can't still have fun 478 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:08,060 -right here on the dock. -How do you figure? 479 00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:10,980 Well, even though Neal doesn't have his license, 480 00:19:11,020 --> 00:19:12,610 we do have... 481 00:19:12,650 --> 00:19:15,230 -Adverbia! -The game of adverbs. 482 00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:18,400 Oh, it is the funnest word game ever. 483 00:19:18,450 --> 00:19:20,450 Hey, you know what? We'll play. We'll all play, 484 00:19:20,490 --> 00:19:22,070 but then Neal, Marcy, 485 00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:24,120 you guys got to give me a tour of this bucket first. 486 00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:25,450 Yes, you give him a tour, 487 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:27,580 and I am gonna bone up on my Adverbia, 488 00:19:27,620 --> 00:19:29,330 because I plays to win. 489 00:19:29,370 --> 00:19:30,420 Oh ho! 490 00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:33,340 [LAUGHTER] 491 00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:35,460 NEAL: Here's this is what's 492 00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:38,010 -called the main cabin. -DOUG: Uh-hmm. 493 00:19:38,050 --> 00:19:39,670 NEAL: Out here is where all the action is. 494 00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:41,260 DOUG: Wow. 495 00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:44,510 MARCIE: Oh, Carrie, I found the Adverbia-- 496 00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:47,350 uh, what are you doing, Car-Car? 497 00:19:47,390 --> 00:19:48,640 Um... 498 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:50,480 What's going on? 499 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:53,020 Oh, my God, she's robbing you. 500 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:57,980 Honey, I thought we beat this. 501 00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:00,030 We're gonna have to move again. 502 00:20:01,780 --> 00:20:03,110 All right. 503 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:04,570 The truth is, I was looking 504 00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:07,490 for Marc and Renee's phone number. 505 00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,250 We really hit it off with them, 506 00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:11,410 and we didn't want to ask you guys for their phone number 507 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:13,630 because we thought your feelings would get hurt. 508 00:20:13,670 --> 00:20:15,460 Please, please understand-- 509 00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:17,300 Oh, no, we understand. 510 00:20:17,340 --> 00:20:18,760 You only pretended to like us 511 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,260 to get to the Koehlers. 512 00:20:20,300 --> 00:20:21,590 You prefer their company to ours, 513 00:20:21,630 --> 00:20:23,010 and why wouldn't you? 514 00:20:23,050 --> 00:20:24,340 Because the Koehlers, they're perfect. 515 00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:25,510 They're just perfect, aren't they? 516 00:20:25,550 --> 00:20:26,720 But you know what? 517 00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:28,350 You're not gonna get to be with them, 518 00:20:28,390 --> 00:20:31,180 because now nobody's gonna get their number. 519 00:20:43,150 --> 00:20:44,320 I got it, honey! 520 00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,380 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 521 00:20:58,670 --> 00:21:00,880 -Excuse me. -Yeah. 522 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:03,430 MAN: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you two leave. 523 00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:05,720 Apparently, you've been making some unwelcome advances 524 00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:08,720 to our other shoppers. 525 00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:10,470 You can't make us leave. 526 00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:11,930 We're paying customers. 527 00:21:11,980 --> 00:21:13,940 Yeah, yeah. We're getting drywall anchors, okay? 528 00:21:13,980 --> 00:21:17,190 So, step off. 529 00:21:17,230 --> 00:21:20,650 I'm gonna some back up in the paint department. 530 00:21:20,690 --> 00:21:21,690 Okay. You know what? 531 00:21:21,740 --> 00:21:23,450 Fine. Let's go, honey. 532 00:21:23,490 --> 00:21:25,450 It smells like bacon in here. 533 00:21:28,990 --> 00:21:30,580 Wait a second, do you, 534 00:21:30,620 --> 00:21:33,580 and the missis happen to like Norah Jones? 535 00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:42,010 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 37089

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.