All language subtitles for Boston.Legal.S02E15.2005.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.DDP-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

ALAN: Previously on Boston Legal…

You're dying and it's eating me up inside.

So, are… are we okay?

You're going off like a dog, aren't you?

-What do you mean?
-When a dog knows it's gonna die,

it goes off into the woods by itself.

Denny got engaged.

-Who is it this time?
-Beverly Bridge.

You think I'm screwing Denny
for his money and power?

It had occurred to me.

I'm prepared to give you
$500,000 right now

if you walk away and never have
any contact with Denny Crane ever again.

Bev turned down the offer that I made her.
She was very offended.

PAUL: This is going to get ugly.

(slow, brisk music playing)

-Hello.
-Hello.

RECEPTIONIST: Crane, Pool & Schmidt.

(Alan groans softly)

(Alan sighs in relief)

Not much going on around here, is there?

No.

I suppose coming to a lawyer's office
can't be much fun.

Actually, everybody seems friendly here.

Well, they're given
an unlimited supply of donuts.

PHYLLIS: Here, sweetheart.

Phyllis?

Alan!

-Hello!
-PHYLLIS (laughs): Hi!

Hello.

I see you have met Marissa.

I have now.

Could we talk… in your office?

Of course.

Would you mind watching her
just a little longer?

PHYLLIS: Thanks.

If you get restless,
we'll be right down this hall.

I had a hard time trying to find you.

I called Cruthers, Abbott…

I was fired. Embezzlement.

Then I tried Young, Frutt & Berlutti…

Oh, yes. That ended badly.

And here you are,
at Crane, Poole & Schmidt.

For now.

-And you?
-Still a legal secretary.

Although the law
isn't as much fun as it was

when I used to watch you bend it.

I need your help.

You used to say that I could
come to you for anything.

I meant sexually.

(giggles)

-This is for Marissa.
-She's lovely, Phyllis.

She seems to be having a bad day, though.

Marissa can't smile.

She had nerve damage from a car accident.

And she had surgery… (inhales deeply)

…to try to correct the problem,
but it didn't work.

Alan… she's had a really tough time of it
at the public school.

She's been teased mercilessly.

DENNY: Here you go. See that?

Now watch this.

It's disappeared. (laughs)

What's up your ear?

And then…

(laughs)

Okay, kid. Let's try it again.

I'm trying to get her into
the Adams Academy for a fresh start.

The admissions director,
he was so excited to meet her!

And then he met her, and she didn't smile.

And that was that.

And these private schools
have become so competitive,

they don't need to let anyone in
who isn't perfect.

When I was in school, the closest
I ever came to that appellation

was to be called a perfect bastard.

I don't wanna sue them,

because if I get known
as a litigious parent,

I'm never gonna get Marissa
into any school.

But…

I do know that you can be, well…

a perfect bastard.

(theme music playing)

Denise,

I understand you're going through
some difficulties

in your personal life.

Um, yeah, it's hard,

but I'll get through it.

From what I know about you,

when things get tough,

you prefer to bury yourself in your work.

Allow me to provide you with a shovel.

This is Theresa Warner

and her daughter, Amelia.

Denise is going to be working with us
on the case.

Amelia is 18.

She was assaulted and raped two months ago

and taken to the nearest hospital,
St. Mary's.

THERESA: Once we knew she was stable,

my first thought was
the morning-after pill.

Only the treating physician
at the hospital told us

that type of treatment was not available

at St. Mary's.

He refused to give it to my daughter.

But the Legislature recently passed
a law requiring hospitals

to provide emergency contraception
for rape victims.

They did, but Massachusetts law
also contains a conscience clause.

Catholic hospitals don't have
to administer any treatments

that conflict
with their religious principles,

emergency contraception included.

As soon as she was discharged,

we went to our family doctor, but…

he told us
it was too late to prescribe it.

(voice breaking)
It needs to be administered

as soon as possible,
but no later than 72 hours after the…

I know this is difficult for both of you.

Amelia, you've been through
so much trauma already.

So we'll begin by pursuing
a settlement with the hospital.

No!

No, I-I want the public to know.

I was raped, and now I'm pregnant

because the doctor wouldn't give me
the contraceptive to prevent it.

(somber music playing)

I want a trial.

(upbeat music playing)

BEVERLY: Where is he?

Denny, are you sure we can count on him?

-Brad is the best.
-(Beverly sighs)

I just made him partner.

Well, I want reassurance.

He served in the Gulf War.

The one that turned out okay.

He was top in his class at West Point

and at Harvard Law School.

I'd put my own life in his hands.

(suspenseful music playing)

-(heart monitor beeping)
-(ventilator hissing)

Once we remove the ventilator,
it'll be a matter of minutes.

You may hear a slight rattle in the chest.

This is normal.

The suffering should be minimal.

Do it.

(suspenseful music intensifies)

Step away from the ventilator!

Move away! I have a court order.

(gasps) Barry!

(crying in relief) Oh, he's alive!

He's alive!

(delightful stinger playing)

So, Marissa,

before I meet with the board at Adams

about reconsidering their decision,

I thought it might be a good idea for us
to get together and…

have a whole bunch of sugar

and talk about school.

Okay.

What's your favorite part of the day?

I like all my classes, but I guess art,
drawing and painting and stuff.

When I was in fourth grade,

I remember having to draw a horse.

It gave me a very tough time.

I'm studying Magritte.

And what do you like about Magritte?

The way things are put together.

It's so unlikely.

They're beautiful like other paintings,
but they make you think.

You wonder why things
are the way they are.

He has this one, a picture of a pipe.

And under, it says, "This is not a pipe."

It says it in French.

I translated it for you.

"Ceci n'est pas une pipe."

-That's it!
-One of my favorites as well.

It gave me an idea for one.

Marissa, this is wonderful.

Thank you.

MARISSA:
Everyone's always telling girls to smile.

They never say that to guys.

I think smiling is overrated.

As you can see.

(quirky stinger playing)

I will not allow you to destroy my Barry!

HOWARD: The cat is dead!

The animal is a vegetable!

-Guys…
-Nature has spoken.

When it's your time, it's your time.

BEVERLY: Says the man with the pacemaker

and the prosthetic balls.

HOWARD (whispers): That's different!

(Beverly scoffs)

(gasps)

Denny, I'm a partner!

It's a cat!

You're exactly right, Brad.

I wouldn't trust an associate
with a case this important.

This is Bev's cat.

That guy in there,
Bev's fourth husband, Mattress Majesty.

Worth millions.

Troubling thing about America.
Anybody can grow up and be rich.

Denny, still, it's a cat.

Barry Manilow is not just a cat.

-What?
-Barry Manilow, the cat's full name.

Even better.

Barry Manilow is Bev's cat.

And if it matters to Bev,
then I, Denny Crane,

have to pretend that it matters to me.

-But, Denny…
-Bev will be happy,

which makes me happy,
which makes you happy.

So really, Brad,
you're doing this to make you happy.

(comical music playing)

(upbeat stinger playing)

Two months ago, I was walking to my car.

I was almost there.
I was already getting out my keys.

When this man, um…

(somber music playing)

(voice breaking) Out of nowhere, he, um…

He grabbed me and…

DENISE: Take your time.

After he was done, he just kept hitting me
and hitting me and hitting me

and then I-I woke up in the hospital.

So you didn't choose
St. Mary's specifically?

No, I mean, I wasn't even conscious.

They just took me
to the nearest emergency room.

DENISE: At any time
while you were being treated,

did nurses or physicians
bring up the possibility

of becoming pregnant from the attack?

Well, my mom and I asked about it,
and they said that the chances were small.

But I wanted to take
the morning-after pill anyway,

just in case.

That's when Dr. Tusten said that

that wasn't available
in a Catholic-affiliated hospital.

-How long were you at St. Mary's?
-Three days.

And after you were discharged?

AMELIA: We went to our family doctor
to try to get the prescription there,

and that's when they told us
that it has to be taken within 72 hours.

I mean, it was too late.
I was already pregnant.

How do you plan to handle the pregnancy?

Well, I've always been morally opposed
to abortion, so…

Of course, I never imagined this.

I don't… I don't know.

When you were told that emergency
contraception was unavailable,

did you ask for a referral to get
the medication somewhere else?

No, because they…

Did you or your mother…

bring the concern up again
during your time at the hospital?

Well, they had made it pretty…

ATTY. JOHN: I'm sorry, Amelia.

Yes… or no?

-No.
-Thank you.

Nothing further.

(somber stinger playing)

(upbeat stinger playing)

It was on Denny's orders.

It's Bev's cat.

That woman's influence on this firm
is increasing daily.

Yeah, well, at least the case
won't go to court.

They've agreed to arbitration.

Once the arbitrator sees the evidence,

he'll rule to pull the plug,
and that will be that.

You'd better hope he doesn't.

Come again?

Brad, since your attempt to bribe Denny's
fiancée to leave him failed so miserably,

we must now stay on her good side,
lest she tell Denny.

You have to win this case
quickly and quietly.

It's like friggin' Shakespeare
around here.

Dr. Kumi, as an OB-GYN,

can you tell us how and why
emergency contraception is used?

It's a higher dosage of the same hormones
that are used in birth control pills.

It's administered as a last-minute
contraceptive to prevent pregnancy.

And in your expert opinion,
how is it related to the abortion pill?

It's not.

RU-486, also called the abortion pill,
terminates an existing pregnancy.

Emergency contraception,
like all methods of contraception,

keeps a pregnancy from occurring.

And if a fertilized egg
has successfully been implanted,

meaning a pregnancy has begun…

Taking the morning-after pill
has no effect.

ANN: It can only prevent a pregnancy.

It cannot terminate one.

So there is no correlation between
the morning-after pill and abortion?

There is a significant
inverse correlation.

Studies show emergency contraception,
if it's made readily available,

could prevent as many
as 700,000 abortions a year.

(hopeful music playing)

(upbeat stinger playing)

Your Honor,
this whole thing is about spite.

-BEVERLY: His.
-HOWARD: Hers!

-Objection!
-JUDGE WILLARD: People,

let's put the vitriol aside,

not to mention the complete ludicrousness
of this case and look at the facts.

Ms. Bridge, you've owned this cat
for 11 years?

That is correct, Your Honor.

Nevertheless, the court awarded
Mr. Bridge joint custody of Barry.

The cat's name is Barry Manilow?

It is, Your Honor.

My client has developed
a strong bond with Barry.

(emphatically) Strong bond.

BRAD: Strong bond!

Give me a break.
Your Honor, let the record reflect

that since the divorce, Mr. Bridge
has been late in returning the cat,

fed him dry food only,
did not have adequate litter box hygiene

and was often seen calling
the cat "stupid" in public.

That's terrible.

It's a cat!

I don't think I hurt his feelings.

As directed by
the joint custody agreement,

Mr. Bridge was required
to make all veterinary payments.

And Ms. Bridge, acting out of malice,

took advantage of that
by subjecting the cat

to the most expensive treatments possible.

Objection. He's disparaging my client.

Three thousand dollars a month?

JUDGE WILLARD:
Could this possibly be correct?

Yeah, it is, Your Honor.

We have an affidavit from the vet.

Barry is 99.9% dead.

BRAD: Which makes him 0.1% alive!

The glass is half full, Your Honor.

Barry's completely alive to me.

How could you tell
under your drunken haze?

-Hey!
-Hey!

Enough!

Let me remind you that I can still
impose sanctions in arbitration.

JUDGE WILLARD:
This is a property matter only.

Keep the emotions out.

(comical music playing)

We shall reconvene tomorrow,
and I will try not to remind myself

that this is a day I will never get back.

(school bell ringing)

Excuse me, could you direct me
to the conference room, please?

-Sure, it's down the hall to the left.
-Thank you.

-Hello, everyone.
-LESTER: Hello.

You must be the chairman, Lester Tremont.

-I am.
-I'm Alan Shore.

Thank you for seeing me.

I won't take up much of your time.

As you know,
I'm here regarding Marissa Deaver.

Yes, we have her application
in front of us.

ALAN: Ah, delightful!

Then we can all take pleasure
in it together.

As you see, she's obviously
an exceptional student.

She's in the top ten percentile
on her standardized tests,

her grades have never dipped
below an A-minus,

and she pursues and excels in a broad
range of extracurricular activities.

And yet, she wasn't admitted
into your fine institution.

We all make mistakes.

And perhaps it was partially our fault.

Her mother tells me she had a dreadful
interview, which sometimes happens,

especially considering the extenuating
circumstances in this case.

My thought to rectify
the situation is this.

You re-interview Marissa,
review her remarkable work,

and reconsider putting her
on your roster here at Adams Academy.

And then let's go beat our archrivals,
whoever they are.

That sounds like quite a plan.

Unfortunately, we have sent out
all of our admissions letters.

The class is full,
and there's an extensive wait list.

-Ah.
-And while we would love

to accommodate Marissa,

it would be unfair
to all of the other applicants.

Yes, it would be.
I was hoping we wouldn't tell them.

-Hmm.
-Have you seen any of Marissa's artwork?

Here is a self-portrait, which certainly
exhibits a depth of insight

that is highly unusual
for a child of nine.

As you know,
Marissa is the girl who cannot smile.

Yes, that was brought to our attention,
and our hearts go out to her.

Tell you what, let's make a deal.

Keep your hearts and let the girl
into your school.

Mr. Shore, the Adams Academy
is a highly demanding,

highly competitive institution.

We turn down over 90% of our applicants

and in a transfer case like this,
it's 98%.

Now, for whatever reasons,
Marissa simply did not meet our standards.

Perhaps she just needs a year of maturing.

Maturing? She's ready for retirement.

Well, she is free to reapply
to our academy next year.

She cannot wait another year.

Thank you for coming in, Mr. Shore.

I take it we've stopped being nice.
I know I have.

Mr. Tremont, Marissa has a disability,

and you and your institution
are discriminating against her.

Mr. Shore, that is not true.

But even if it were true,
as a private school,

we have every right to discriminate
against a disabled student.

As a private school,
we are not bound by the I.D.E.A.

and neither parents nor students
have any recourse

to challenge denial of service.

Oh my God. You're a lawyer.

Yes. Several of us are.

ALAN:
Let me tell you two things about myself.

I, too, am a lawyer.

I can be painfully vindictive,
and I do not play fair.

That's three things.

See? Not playing fair already.

And I'm just getting started.

Mr. Shore,
our school has been sued several times…

never successfully.

(resolute music playing)

You know what they say, Lester.

You never forget your first time.

Dr. Tusten, Ms. Bauer is saying
there is no moral debate at play here.

DR. TUSTEN: In the Catholic religion,
human life begins

when the egg is fertilized, not implanted.

At that stage, a life is in motion.

Regardless of how it happened,

my moral and religious beliefs
will not allow me to interfere.

And the conscience clause assures
that I don't have to.

Of course, you also follow this.

The US Department of Justice's protocol

for treating sexual assault victims,
is that right?

DR. TUSTEN: It's a very effective tool

for handling the delicate nature
of these cases.

In the 130 pages of that document,

does it ever recommend
the use of the morning-after pill?

No, but it does address
several important issues

regarding the care
of a sexual assault victim,

including collecting a biological sample

to assist in locating
and prosecuting the attacker.

And were you successful
in obtaining that sample?

DR. TUSTEN: We were.
The rapist was identified, convicted

and is awaiting sentencing.

Nothing further.

Dr. Tusten, in extreme circumstances
like sexual assault,

many Catholic hospitals
will make an exception

and provide the rape victims
with emergency contraception.

Catholic hospitals are free
to interpret sections of the ethical

and religious directives
liberally or conservatively.

We at St. Mary's take a very strict
application of Catholic teachings.

Tell me, Dr. Tusten, do you have
a set schedule at the ER,

9 to 5, Monday to Friday?

Shifts are much longer than that.

We're often on call for 24 hours
at a time.

-So you often work weekends.
-Of course.

But that would put you squarely
on the job during the Sabbath,

and Exodus 35:2 states that,

"He who works on the Sabbath
should be put to death."

That's a rather
fundamentalist interpretation.

Moving on, Mark 16:18 states that,

"A believer can drink any deadly thing
and not be harmed."

As a physician, are you ready to say
that your Catholic patients

can take a swig of arsenic
and suffer no adverse effects?

Well, that's not intended
to be interpreted literally.

But you interpret some things literally.

Are you saying that
you just follow the parts of the Bible

that make sense to you?

God was fairly straightforward
with "Thou shalt not kill."

(pensive music playing)

They said, "If you pour it, he will come."

ALAN: Not tonight, Denny.

I'm angry.

Did you know private schools
can openly discriminate

because of religion, gender,
even disability?

Of course they can. They're private.
That's the way it ought to be.

That's the way it once was with clubs

before the feminist lesbian cabal
ruined this country.

I'm trying to get a young girl
into the Adams Academy.

Little Miss Gloomy Gerta there?

-She's not gloomy.
-Oh?

I pulled a coin out of her ear.
She didn't even laugh.

There's something wrong with that girl.

That is the acid test.

You're a little Gloomy Gerta yourself,
aren't you?

I don't know how I'm going to get her in.

The entire legal system sits squarely
on the other side.

Well, Alan,
you're missing the whole point.

-Which is?
-The concept of private.

Private doesn't operate by the law.

Private operates above the law,

like… like Greek gods hovering…
above the Earth

on their own private mount Olympus.

Now the Greek gods
broke the rules and the laws,

but the one thing they respected
was power and influence.

Now, Alan, if all else fails,

and you think you've lost…

pretend you've won.

It works for our president.

(comical percussive music playing)

Maybe it just isn't funny.

I hate cats.

I beg your pardon?

Can't stand them.

Barry belonged to my third husband.

When he tried to pick me up at a bar,
his toupee was slipping

and he told me he was a breast inspector.

And you married him?

You can see why I prefer the cat.

Husbands come and go, and when they go,
their friends go with them…

and then you end up alone.

Except for Barry.

I apologize for what can be construed
as an inappropriate gesture last week.

As you should.

And I know…

you think I'm blackmailing you
because you tried to bribe me,

and I am.

But…

(mellow music playing)

…putting all this aside for now…

I really need you to win this.

Please.

(knocking on door)

You wanted to see me, Mr. Crane?

Yeah, yeah, Gary, um…

Come on in.

Come here. Come on.

Come here! (chuckles)

(both chuckle)

Funny.

How did you do that?

(both laugh)

You and me, lunch tomorrow.

I'll show you how. (laughs)

(Garrett laughs nervously)

(upbeat stinger playing)

Let's keep in mind exactly who's at fault
for Amelia Warner's trauma…

her rapist.

Instead, here we are attacking
the doctor that treated Amelia,

whose efforts are responsible
for the apprehension

and imprisonment of that rapist.

Because that doctor,
acting within his rights,

did not administer medication that
conflicted with his religious beliefs.

Beliefs that he promised to uphold
when he was hired at St. Mary's.

ATTY. JOHN: But forget religion.

Let's look at the law.

In 130 pages of protocol
on how to treat sexual assault victims,

the United States Department of Justice

never even mentions
the use of emergency contraception.

It's simply not the standard of care.

There is, in fact, no law in place
in the state of Massachusetts

that explicitly requires
Catholic hospitals to dispense

or provide information
for emergency contraception

under any circumstances.

And we simply can't pretend that there is
on the basis of sentiment…

or sympathy.

One of our many rights in this country
is what is called "Informed consent."

Every patient has the right to decide
what happens to his or her body.

And to make that decision,

a patient needs to rely on her doctor
to disclose all available options.

Do you want chemotherapy
or surgery for a brain tumor?

Do you want to amputate below the knee

or hope for the best
and risk death from gangrene?

Do you want to prevent pregnancy

or have your rapist's baby?

Amelia Warner didn't get to choose.

She was deprived of a crucial,
medically relevant option

because her doctor did not approve of it.

She didn't choose to receive health care
restricted by religious doctrine.

She was taken to the ER unconscious.

She relied on her doctor at St. Mary's
to provide her with proper care

or refer her elsewhere, and he failed her.

Twenty-five thousand women
will become pregnant from rape this year.

If all of those women
took this emergency contraception,

22,000 of those pregnancies
could be avoided.

Doctors provide a crucial public benefit
to a diverse society

and we cannot condone it when they impose
their own religion on patients

whom they are professionally
obligated to serve,

especially patients
in their most vulnerable states.

A teenager, for example,

brought into an emergency room
after a brutal rape.

A teenager who is now left to choose
between violating her own moral principles

in terminating the pregnancy

or postponing college
to deliver this child.

A child conceived against her will,

a direct result of the most traumatic
ordeal she has ever endured.

(solemn music playing)

Mr. Tremont.

Mr. Shore, I believe our business
is done in regards to Miss Deaver.

ALAN: Oh, absolutely.
Water under the bridge.

I'm here on an entirely unrelated matter.

(telephone chiming)

Yes, what is it, Cindy?

There's a news crew from ABC here.

-What?
-That happens to be the unrelated matter.

What's going on?

(chuckles) Well, the thing is,
it's all my fault.

I was so sure I was going to be victorious

and persuade you to admit Marissa
into your school,

total hubris on my part,

I went and called Darcy Devictor.

She does the human interest pieces
over at the local ABC affiliate.

We were briefly an item.

Don't let her perky
on-air demeanor fool you.

She's actually quite deviant
in the bedroom.

Anyway, I figured this was exactly
the kind of story that Darcy likes to,

and this is the part that gets me excited,

sink her teeth into.

You know, the little artist
that can't smile

and the supportive school that loves her.

I always like showing off
in front of an ex-girlfriend,

but wouldn't you know it,
I got excited and jumped the gun.

So I'll let you get back to work.

I'm going to go out and let her know
that I was wrong, and you were right

and the school prevailed
in its determination

to discriminate against this little girl
and her disability.

Oh! (groans)

Do you happen to have
any of Marissa's drawings still?

Darcy was dying to show them on air.

Hey, this may be a way
to salvage the story, actually.

You know, the little girl who can't smile,

her dream shattered
by the exclusionary will

of the inbred elite.

Something like that.

Oh, wait.

I have some.

Darcy!

(Alan, Darcy smooching)

Lester!

Doggie massage, pet Prozac,
kitty yoga, bark mitzvahs,

pet plastic surgery and now life support?

What is wrong with us?

Have we lost all perspective?

There are now as many starving people
in this world

as there were people
in this world a generation ago.

And yet, every year in this country,

we spend over 30 billion dollars
on our pets.

Your Honor, you had this right from
the beginning.

This is ludicrous.

This is a property issue
just as you noted.

And as hard as it is
to let Barry Manilow go,

it's time to stop prolonging
the inevitable.

Your Honor, I have to admit
when I first took this case,

I thought it was just as silly as you do.

I mean, this couple broke up.
They managed to divvy up the car and TV.

Why couldn't they figure out
what to do with the cat?

Because…

unlike our cars and our TVs, our pets,
they transcend mere property.

They're the property
that lives and breathes.

The property that loves us
back unconditionally

in an increasingly harsh
and isolating world.

This is what Barry Manilow is
and always has been to Beverly Bridge.

Now Barry Manilow didn't care
how much makeup Beverly wore

or whether her outfits
were just a little bit too tight

for someone her age.

He never ostracized her
when she got divorced.

Never demanded she get a job.
Never asked her how she spent her money.

Never came home smelling
like another woman.

And he never made Beverly his trophy.

Barry Manilow was simply there
for Beverly.

In fact, Barry Manilow treated Beverly
better than most of her husbands did.

Now he may be very ill now…

but there's a slight chance
that he can recover.

We need to hold on to that chance.

'Cause who among us here
has the power to say

that the spark of a soul…

is any less significant
because it resides in the body of a pet?

I do.

It's a cat.

And the costs of keeping this cat
on a ventilator indefinitely

are exorbitant,

especially coupled with the pain
this cat must be in

and its remote chance of recovery.

JUDGE WILLARD:
Ms. Bridge, I am sorry for your loss,

but I must hereby order that
Barry Manilow's ventilator be shut off.

(somber music playing)

(door shuts)

(heart monitor beeping)

(somber music continues playing)

(heart monitor beeping)

(heart monitor beeping)

(mellow music playing)

That damn cat isn't gonna die.

Fine, you can have him.

(bright music playing)

Has the jury reached a verdict?

We have, Your Honor.

JUDGE DALE: What say you?

"We the jury find in favor
of the plaintiff

and hereby award compensatory damages
in the amount of $100,000.

Additionally, we award punitive damages
in the amount of 2.6 million dollars."

JUDGE DALE:
The court thanks the jury for its service.

(gavel pounds) Court adjourned.

(crowd murmuring)

Thank you.

Congratulations.

Thank you so much.

Amelia, you are a courageous human being.

I don't feel like it, but thank you.

(bright music playing)

Oh.

You look good in blue, Marissa.

MARISSA: I drew this for you.

Oh, my goodness.

It looks like they're going
to have quite a day.

You know, Marissa…
not smiling has its benefits.

You don't give away
your thoughts so easily.

It's a great advantage in card playing.

That's funny but…

I'd rather fit in.

Have you ever heard
of a Greek philosopher named Epictetus?

No.

He was a funny man

with a certain flair for life.

Epictetus compared people

who fit in to the white threads of a toga,

indistinguishable.

He wanted to be the purple thread,
that small part which is bright,

and makes all
the rest appear graceful and beautiful.

"Why then," he asked, "do you tell me
to make myself like the many?

"And if I do,
how shall I still be purple?"

Sometimes being purple is kind of a pain.

(mellow music playing)

Yes.

-Bev.
-Hello, Brad.

Barry's feeling better.

Well, he doesn't, you know,
walk or… move or anything,

but he's breathing on his own.

I-I didn't exactly win the case,
but "All's well that ends well."

So we're square.

I'll tell you when we're square, Brad.

("When You're Smiling
by Louis Armstrong playing)

Damn it!

So?

I just spoke with her mother.

She's having an abortion…
while it's still legal.

A girl who said she would never
even consider it.

Well, what's the alternative?

Having custody battles with your rapist?

Sorry. That was really tasteless.

It's all tasteless.

I mean, the more science comes up

with alternatives
to the misery of abortion,

the louder the opposition.

Because it's about power.

It's always been about power.

These guys have any friends?

(Denise chuckles softly)

Not for long.

DENNY: Alan.

I've been thinking about something.

What's that?

I want you to kill me.

The scotch and cigars
and nightly consumption of red meat

have that well in hand.

No, no, no. I'm serious.

I don't fear death.

I never have.

But I am afraid of being…
hooked up to a machine.

All those tubes, brain… mush.

Would you like to live like that?

No, if it came to that, my friend,
I would pull your plug.

Pull a plug?

What kind of a death is that?

I want you to shoot me.

Shoot you?

(loudly) Denny Crane is not going
to be turned off like… a hair dryer.

You live by the gun, you die by the gun.

I'm not gonna shoot you.

Why not? I'd shoot you.

Denny, you've been a lawyer
in this town for 40 years.

I'm sure there are plenty of people
who would willingly shoot you.

Well, I don't want to be shot
by a stranger.

I want to be shot by someone
who… who cares for me.

The answer is no.

(groans) You…

democrat!

Protesting wars, banning guns.

If you Nancys had your way,

nobody would ever shoot anybody.

And then where would we be?

Where would we be?

ALAN: Next on Boston Legal…

-I'd like you to be best man.
-What do you mean?

If a man wants his closest friend
to be his best man, he should have it.

Alzheimer's was her worst fear.

She had gotten to the point
where she was losing control of her body,

and she begged me to help her do it.

-How did you comply?
-Morphine.

That's what we did with my father.

-Morphine drip.
-I got her in a program.

I told her if she left, she was cut off.

She's your daughter.
You should go see her.

Who's dead?

(theme music playing)

OLD WOMAN: You stinkah!