All language subtitles for Jane McDonald Lost in Japan Tokyo Pt1 S01E01

JANE MCDONALD:
'I'm going big in Japan

'on a solo adventure like
no other I've ever experienced.'

It's the very famous crossing.

Crazy. It's fantastic.

'And with stacks of online research
and my trusty guidebooks,

'I'm going to discover
the history and culture

'of this breathtaking country.'

Wow. Gosh, look at that.

'I'm travelling alone
but won't be lonely,

'as I've enlisted
a host of expert locals

'to reveal Japan's history,
culture and secrets to me.'

I'm going to have
my first octopus ball.

Oh, yeah!
Yay!

'I'll be exploring
historic Kyoto...'

It is quite spectacular, isn't it?

'..and tasting
all Osaka has to offer.'

That's one of the best things
I've tasted in Japan.

'But the first stop
on my solo expedition

'takes me to the extraordinary
capital of Tokyo...

'where I immerse myself
in a culture

'that takes me right out
of my comfort zone.'

WOMAN SHOUTS
Is this a dream?

'And I won't just be wrestling
with culture shock -

'there'll be literal wrestling,
too.

'Wish me luck.'
JANE EXCLAIMS

'I throw out the playbook
on British table manners...'

That's good, that's good,
that's good.

'..and I step back in time

'to an exquisite shrine
soaked in tradition.'

That deserves a deep bow.

'Welcome to Tokyo.'

'So, this is it. Jane in Japan.

'Yorkshire Tea to tea ceremonies,

'battered fish to sushi

'and so much more, I can't wait.

'It's 6,000 miles from Wakefield
to the islands of Japan,

'clustered in
the Pacific east of Asia.

'My odyssey's taking me
to the ancient mysteries of Kyoto

'and the food hub of Osaka.

'But first, it's the capital, Tokyo.

'My connecting flight's in Helsinki,

'but the downtime's fine,
as I need all the prep I can get.'

I've got two hours to kill.

In fact, I've got 13-and-a-half
hours on the plane as well.

So I'll be able to speak Japanese,
never mind just learn about it

by the time I get off.

I've learned "konnichiwa".

And none of this handshaking thing,
the hugging - no, no, no.

It's all bowing.

Course, it's respectful
for any country that you're going to

to learn their customs
so that you don't offend anyone.

And you know me,
I can offend anybody.

So, here we go.

So, konnichiwa.

'Which literally means "good day",

'or as we say at home,
"Now, then, how do?" '

We're here.
We're in Tokyo in Japan.

And it is all exciting.

'My earliest memories of Japan
are from travel shows.

'Even in black and white,
the country seems technicolour,

'and I couldn't have imagined then
that I'd see it for myself one day.'

I'm bubbling away inside,

but that could be
my digestive system

because, you know,
I've just done a 13-hour flight.

But I don't think it is,

I think it's just that
I'm really excited about being here.

It's just totally different
from anything is Japan.

I've never seen
so many people, either.

People seem to walk in lines,
and nobody jaywalks here as well.

Everybody stands at the kerb,
fascinating to see.

'From my research,
I'm expecting to be confused,

'intrigued
and excited at every turn.

'But one thing all capitals
have in common

'is that city centres
are the place to be.

'So that's why I've booked a hotel
in the Shibuya district.'

Hello!
Hello.

Here is your room key.
Fantastic. Thank you.

Have a good day. Thank you
very much. Arigatou gozaimasu.

Thank you. Bye-bye.
Thank you. Bye-bye.

Oh, it's my bra size.

Ah, here we go.

'I checked out one of those
places-you-must-visit websites.

'So I'm dumping my bags

'and heading off to the first spot
they recommended.

'The first suggestion is Shibuya's
world-famous pedestrian crossing.

'No, really. A pedestrian crossing.'

It's here.

The very famous crossing
is actually here.

This is what Oxford Circus
was based on.

'I read that ours
was remodelled on this

'in a bid to ease
pedestrian congestion.

'3,000 people can cross
this intersection of seven roads

'every two minutes in rush-hour
without anyone kicking off.'

Although it's so busy,
it's so organised.

There's no horns tooting,

there's nobody swearing at somebody
going past you.

Everybody is waiting.

It's crazy. It's fantastic.

Up there is Shibuya Sky,

and apparently,
it's one of the best views in Tokyo.

It's a very, very popular place,

so if you are coming here,
get your ticket before you do.

'Wherever you are in the world,

'I've learned if you can buy

'your attraction ticket
before arrival, do.

'It saves a lot of bother.'

Up another escalator.

Wow.

Wow.

Gosh, look at that.

It's hard to believe that in 1945,

there was absolutely nothing here...

because it was bombed in the war.

And now look at it.

There's just buildings
for miles and miles and miles,

and they're high as well.

But there's always
the little park there, isn't there?

It's a bit like Central Park,
Hyde Park.

Now, there's a real massive queue

to film the sunset over Tokyo.

But I've just found this bit here.

Has nobody cottoned on to this bit?

Or are we not allowed here?
Cos, er, that's fantastic, innit?

'I read that my beloved
Blackpool Tower is 518 feet tall,

'whilst this stands at 751.

'Sorry, Blackpool.

'And try this -
Blackpool's home to 141,000 folk.

'Down there,
there's 38 million people.

'Mind you, it is a tad bigger.'

Do you know, I don't know
if that is actually mist or smog.

SHE CHUCKLES

But whatever it is, it makes it
look mysterious and romantic.

Look at thi-i-i-is.

I hope it's taken.

Just my luck it won't have done.

Oh, it has.
JANE GASPS

Oh, yeah.

Once in a lifetime, innit...

that you get a selfie

with a view of a sunset

on one of the highest buildings
in Tokyo?

'After a much-needed night's kip,

'I'm up early to experience
Tokyo's spiritual side,

'particularly its main religion,
Shinto.

'Google Japan's spirituality, and
you'll get over 71 million results.

'But I honed in on the city's
famous Hie-jinja shrine

'and discovered one of the easiest
ways to visit the site is by metro.'

So, how hard can this be?

I'm here, Shibuya.

Er, and I'm going to...

Tameike-sanno there.

'Around a staggering
three billion people

'use the Tokyo Metro each year,

'compared to a mere one billion
on the London Underground.'

"Purchase Pasmo".

Pasmo lets you go on any train
in Japan.

It's a bit like an Oyster card.

'It's all geared up
for convenience here.

'Buy the card, then use
the Pasmo app to top it up.

'And it's not just for travel.

'You can use it in vending machines,
too.'

So, that's it. That's quite simple.

It's really, really easy,
even for me.

SHE CHUCKLES
Right, station.

I really worried about Japan
cos I thought,

"I don't know the language."

But they do everything in English
as well.

So, I'm gonna go up there
cos I need G6.

I cannot get over how clean it is,

how well structured it is.

There's even a guard making sure
that you get on and off all right.

I mean, look at it. It's immaculate.

It's so well run,
it smells lovely on here.

And I feel a bit...

I don't want
to bring my country down,

but maybe somebody should come

and have a look how this is run,
you know...

er, because this is just...

..second to none.

And I'm really having a very
pleasant experience on this today.

I didn't know how nice
it was gonna be.

'Now, I don't like to be
caught short while travelling,

'so I better spend a penny,
or a yen,

'and I hear the public loos
are like NASA mission control.'

I don't usually do this,

but I'm going to take you
to see the toilets

cos I want you to see
how clean everything is

and how fabulous it all is.

But you can't come, all right?

So I'm gonna take this instead.
See you.

Right, it's just me and you again.
Me and you.

I haven't done this
for a while, have I?

Right, look at this.

Look at how clean it all is. Look.

Look. It's a heated seat.

It's like a bidet built in.

That's for your rear.
That's for the front.

So, you've got your pressure.
This is the privacy.

Privacy means if you're a bit loud

or you've got a bit of wind,
can't hear you.

FLUSHING AND BIRDSONG
ON SPEAKERS

That's a bit fab, innit?
Think I'll keep one of them in mine.

Can you hear the birds singing?

The birds are singing, that's going,
so you can't hear anything in here.

And this is the public underground
in Japan.

That's better.

'But I'm not here
to learn about the smallest jewel

'but to have
the biggest experiences.

'So coming up, I'll be searching
for the meaning of it all

'when I follow billions who have
already learned their fortune

'at a Shinto shrine...'

"I feel as if I was strolling on
the spring fields with my family.

"So comfortable".

Wow, that's quite emotional,
actually, isn't it?

'..and I discover
that bad manners back home

'are considered good ones here.'

SHE SLURPS

There you go. There you go.
There you go.

'I'm travelling around Japan
to try and discover

'what makes this wonderfully
different

'and sometimes
beautifully bizarre culture tick.

'And I'm starting in Tokyo.

'We all know and use
Japanese technology,

'but their spirituality
is just as important here.

'So I'm keen to understand
how those two sides work in harmony.

'To help me, I've booked
licensed guide Yukiko,

'who's meeting me

'at the Hie-jinja Shinto shrine
in Shibuya.'

Yukiko?

Oh, yes, I'm Yukiko.
Oh, hi.

Hi, nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.

So, this is the shrine.
Is it a shrine or a temple?

Oh, this is a shrine.
The temple is for the Buddhism.

Right, I see.
Mm-hm. Yes. Yeah.

So temples are always Buddhist?

Yes, always Buddhist.

Yes, and the Shinto shrine
is for the Shinto.

That is the worship of the nature.
OK.

Yes, and also the ancestor worship.
Right.

'Yukiko tells me that Shinto spirits
take the form of many things -

'wind, rain, mountains
and even fertility.'

This gate is called "torii",

and it's a kind of, like,
the boundary.

Right. Yes, divide the sacred area
from the secular world.

So, when we go through,
we show our respect to this place.

'And that respect
is shown by bowing.'

Actually, there is
three types of bow -

the light bow and deep bow
and in-between.

I think we would like to show
our respect to the nature.

So, this shrine's all about nature.

Yes, especially the mountain deity
and also the water.

Wow.
Mm-hm.

That deserves a deep bow.

Yeah, deep bow.

OK.
Yeah, OK.

So, let's do it together.
OK.

In shrine, the middle pass is
considered as a pass for divinity,

so we just avoid to walk
on the middle.

So we walk on the side.
Right, OK.

So, you never walk up the centre?

Mm-hm. Yeah, that's right.
Ah.

'Shrines are woven into the fabric
of everyday life,

'used whenever people
seek peace or serenity,

'and I can feel
its spirituality already.'

So, before we go into the main hall,

we will purify ourselves at here.

The purification is a very
important part of the shrine.

Right.
Mm-hm.

So, first of all,
you wash your hand.

OK.
Yes. Mm-hm.

And the right hand.
Uh-huh.

And then rinse your mouth.
Rinse your mouth?

Yes. Don't drink it.

'The point of this
is to ward off bad luck,

'disease and guilt.

'But I'm assuming it's much deeper

'than atoning for that extra glass
of wine I had last night.'

In front of us, the main hall.
Uh-huh.

That's where the deity
of the mountain is enshrined.

So, that's the worship
to the mountain? Yes.

Worship of the mountain
and also the water.

'But worship's not the only draw.

'You can pick up a blessed
lucky charm or "omamori"

'for victory, health, wealth -
you name it.'

So, let's get a charm here.
OK.

'With so much good fortune
to choose from,

'I hardly know where to start.'

There's a charm
for the travel safety.

Oh, travel safety?

Oh, I definitely need one of those.
Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

So, what does this mean?

So, it means
the road-traffic safety.

I will put that in my car.

In fact, I'll take it everywhere
with me.

Yes. Mm-hm.

So every car I'm in should...
Yeah.

That will be great.
Yeah.

'So, that's my present sorted.
What about my future?

'Well, that's written on a strip
of paper called an "omikuji",

'a bit like the fortune cookies
we get at home,

'but without the sugary coating.'

Is there anything bad in there?
Yes.

Actually, there are several rungs.
Right.

Yes, from the best luck

to the bad luck, so...
JANE EXCLAIMS

But in that case, don't worry,

there is a place that
you can leave your bad luck.

That's good.

So, if you get bad luck,
you can leave it here.

Sure. Right.
I'm pleased about that.

'They believe it's like
hanging out the laundry.

'Bad luck just blows away
in the breeze.

'I love the poetry
and logic of that.'

"How to do omikuji".
Omikuji.

Right.
"Please disinfect with alcohol.

"And if you shake the box upside,
please show the stick.

"Down the stick will come
that came out to the staff".

OK.

'I'm hoping this will be easier
than it sounds.'

You can just pick...

Just pick one out?
Mm-hm, mm-hm.

'Yukiko says omikuji
are like horoscopes back home -

'not taken too seriously
but can sometimes offer comfort.'

OK.

What is it?

Well...

"I feel as if I was strolling
on the spring fields with my family.

"So comfortable".

Wow, that's quite emotional,
actually, isn't it?

Your fortune, quite good.

SHE LAUGHS
It's all it is.

"You can realise almost everything

"as if you could drive easily
on the downhill road.

"Work hard and believe,
and you'll be successful,

"just like grasses grow
thanks to the rain heaven gives".

This is just so... so beautiful.

So, this is good luck?

This is good luck.
This is good luck. Yeah.

Thank goodness for that.

I was a bit worried about that,
but now...

So, you can keep it.

I will definitely keep that.
Thank you.

I know we're supposed to bow,
but I want a hug.

Oh, yeah. I love this style.

Thank you. Thank you so very much.
Thank you.

I'm really sort of getting
the culture here now.

It's being grateful.

It makes you think when you come
to a shrine like this.

And it's taking time out
to actually be grateful,

and this is what this is all about,

all the deities
that you're grateful for.

It's very peaceful, and it's...

It just makes you feel better,
it makes you feel better.

'It's amazing to think that
just metres outside this zen calm

'is a high-tech city in motion.

'And I've an appetite to see more.

'Talking of appetite,
all I can smell is incredible food.

'Lead on, stomach.'

I am in the mood for noodles,

so I'm gonna meet someone who's
gonna teach me all about ramen,

which has got noodles in it.

'Ramen's very popular here,
and I'm gonna be honest,

'I've seen it on all menus
back home.

'I know it involves
noodles and soup,

'but that's all I know.

'As ever, the helpful internet
hooked me up

'with a local foodie, Frank.'

Hello, Jane.
Hi, hi.

Nice to meet you.
Likewise, nice to meet you.

Oh, great. So, you're gonna
teach me how to eat noodles?

Yes. We're gonna dive in
to some fantastic ramen.

Oh, great.
Ramen noodles.

'So, I was right.

'Frank says ramen
is a Japanese noodle soup,

'but way more than
our humble minestrone,

'it's a rich broth with noodles and
a selection of meat and vegetables.'

Do we just go in?

Actually, we order from here.

What?

These photos will help us
make our decision.

Shall I have a look?

Yeah, please, have a look.
Now, then.

It all sounds good.
Ooh, ramen and dumplings.

What's in the dumplings?

So, those should be pork, cabbage,

garlic, with a nice crispy exterior
with the wrap there.

Ooh.
So fried dumpling.

So what do you do now, put that in?

Exactly, right through there.
Ooh! There we go!

Now we just need to pick up
the tickets there and your change.

We're gonna give those tickets
to the staff.

I love this.

You just pick it.
It's like, "Right, and..."

It's a vending machine, really.

'How long before my local chippy
has one of these outside?'

Thank you.

Cheers. Do I give you those?

Thank you!

SPEAKS JAPANESE

You can also choose the firmness
of the noodles.

Oh.
Any preference?

We can get, I think,
you know, in the middle.

Normal is a good way to go.

REPLIES IN JAPANESE

Ha-ha!

Oh, blimey.

It's like,
"How do you want your steak?"

Basically, basically.
Yeah, you got the whole range.

Do... Do we all use chopsticks
here or...?

Yeah, ramen, we'll be...
We'll be using chopsticks.

So you don't eat ramen with a spoon?

You use a spoon

to assist you with the noodles,
if you like.

And also use a spoon
to grab a sip of soup.

OK. Do you use...?

You could do that,
but it's gonna be pretty hot,

so I would say, yeah,
start with the soup.

Towards the end, though,
as that soup cools down,

this is also something
that's definitely OK.

Locals in Japan
will slurp their ramen,

making this
vacuum cleaner-like sound...

Really?...
..when they're eating ramen.

Is that not rude?
Not in Japan.

Three reasons why
Japanese people slurp.

One is that you're cooling it down.

Ramen is served piping hot.

Two, you're taking in more air
through your nose,

so maybe enhancing the flavours
just like with a wine.

And three,
you're complementing the chef.

Thank you.

That's like a three course meal,
isn't it, all in one bowl?

Yes. All in one bowl, absolutely.

Right, here we go.

Here, Jane,
we've got chopsticks here for you.

And for me.

OK.

So let's consider this, uh,
the noodle pull.

Basically, you're reaching down

and grabbing those noodles, as such.

How come you've got all them
and I've got that?

Oh, it's just cos I've had practice.
OK!

SLURPING

Yeah, there you go, there you go!

JANE CHUCKLES

SLURPING

'Since I promised to throw myself
into Japanese culture,

'I'm gonna slurp like a local.'

It just feels wrong.
THEY LAUGH

No! I wouldn't go that far.
I wouldn't say wrong.

It does make sense,

when you're over a bowl
eating noodles with chopsticks,

because your mouth is having
to work with the chopsticks.

And, to be fair, the noodles
are quite slippery, so this is...

I think you're doing a great job.

JANE CHUCKLES

'I never thought I'd be complimented
on my soup-slurping.

'But it's even little
things like this

'which remind me
I'm not in Wakey any more.'

'Coming up,

'I go in search
of the iconic national sport

'before taking centre stage myself.'

CHEERING

'And sticking with ancient arts,

'I try my hand at the wonders
of origami,

'and I'm taught by a master.'

Oh, that's good, isn't it?!

Pair of lips.

'I'm in Japan on the cultural
experience of a lifetime.

'First stop on my solo tour
is Tokyo.

'So far, it's been full-on,

'so I want to reset
and take a moment and open myself up

'to the spirit of Zen.

'As a child, I made paper planes
and paper chains,

'and that was the extent
of my origami prowess.

'But today, I get the chance
to learn from a true master,

'and my guide Yukiko is on hand
to make the introductions.'

'Yukiko tells me origami
literally means "folding paper",

'and it's been here in Japan
since the sixth century.'

Hey.
Hello!

Jane, he is Mr Kobayashi.

Mr Kobayashi, nice to meet you.

THEY SPEAK JAPANESE,
JANE LAUGHS

Just take a seat.
You speak a little English, yes?

This is a pen.
THEY LAUGH

It's better than my Japanese.

Very, ne, interesting.

Look at you, just, oh...

Ha! You don't even have to look!

You just...
Specialist.

Ha! Specialist!

How long?
My company 170 years old.

Wow.
Older than my father, grandfather.

Wow. Amazing.

'Hearing how long his family's
been connected to origami

'makes me feel incredibly
honoured to meet him.

'It's no surprise my guidebook
lists his store

'as one of Tokyo's
cultural treasures.'

Oh, that's good, isn't it?!

Pair of lips.

England rose.
Oh, an English rose.

It's amazing.

Look at this.

This is an art.

'I'm mesmerised by Mr Kobayashi's
ability to fold magic

'from paper before my very eyes.'

JANE CHUCKLES

Oh.
That's for you.

For me? Oh, to put... Yeah?

WHISPERS: Wow.

For me? That way?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Look at that.

In't it beautiful, that?

'Mr Kobayashi travels the world
teaching origami.

'What an honour to be taught by him.
Here goes.'

Samurai helmet.

Right, a samurai helmet.

You know?
Yes.

I've got to make this now.

Like that?

Right.

OK.

I've got no idea.

Wait, that?

'Three folds in,
and I'm already lost.'

To there? A-ha!

'Mr Kobayashi
makes this look so easy,

'but it's really not.'

Right.

I've got no idea!

I was doing so well.

HE SPEAKS JAPANESE

Ah!

Fantastic!

'Hm, leave it to the experts, Jane.'

Do you need any skills
to be able to do this?

Concentration.

But you haven't got concentration?!

THEY CHUCKLE

Oh!

Ha!

JANE CACKLES

I'm very flattered.

You... You're a joy to be around.

JANE CHUCKLES

I have had the best afternoon
with Mr Kobayashi.

All fun. He makes everything fun.

And just like we do jigsaws
and puzzles at home,

this is very, very popular,
worldwide,

but especially here in Japan.

I could spend days with that man.

And I have laughed so much
with this beautiful soul

that is Mr Kobayashi.

So thank you.

'As my restful afternoon
glides into early evening,

'I'm taking things up a notch.

'I've booked a night out,
Tokyo style.'

'From craft to culture,

'I'm throwing myself into one of
Japan's finest and biggest exports -

'sumo.

'But I wanted to find a twist
on the traditional,

'so a few searches later,
I found just the place,

'combining wrestling with food.'

Very excited today

cos I'm here to have
the sumo experience.

Oh, yeah.
I've seen them on the telly,

but I want to see one up close,

so I'm really gonna get immersed
in this today

and learn all about what they eat,
and what they do,

and how they get into it.

And I've got a little bit more
access than normal,

and I'm very excited about that.

Hello!

Hi, Jane.
Hi, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you. My name is Aneko,
and welcome to our place. Thank you.

Because you're a little bit
early today,

would you like to take
a look at the kitchen?

Fantastic, thank you.
OK, mm-hm.

Ooh, let's do this.

So this restaurant is very...
JANE CHUCKLES

..unique, because we have the, erm,

the wrestlers actually
prepare the food.

And they also do the show, too.
Oh, that's good.

So, this chap was a sumo wrestler?
Yes, they retired, yes.

They look very young to be retired.
Oh, yes. They're in their 30s.

Actually,
he just retired last September.

He was one of the five
strongest wrestlers. Really?

Mm-hm, in the championship.

So we're honoured today,
to get cooking

by one of the champions.
Yes, yes.

'These former champions learned
to cook in sumo school,

'where they counted calories
to keep the weight on.

'In just two meals,
they'd eat 7,000 calories a day.'

Thank you.

Fantastic.

Chopsticks, right.

Hi!

Mm!

How are you?
I'm really well. How are you?

Good, thank you.
I'm Jane, by the way.

Hi, I'm Rachel.
Rachel.

This is Pippa, my daughter.
Pippa. Hi, Pippa.

We're just having a mummy-daughter
trip from Australia.

You've definitely got the look.
It's fabulous.

Oh, there you go.

I've seen them cooking this,
and it looks really good!

It does look good.
What is that sauce? What is it?

I don't really know.
Do you want me to taste it?

Oh, that's a bit thick, innit.

Oh,
it really does go well with that,

but that is delicious.

'Glad to see my chopstick training
with Frank has started to pay off.'

Then you've got your
sesame cabbage there,

and then this lovely rice.

All of it just mixes
really well together.

If I carry on eating
like this today,

I'm gonna look like a sumo myself.

'But for the final course,

'something you wouldn't find
in your local buffet restaurant,

'not without the police
getting involved.'

OK, now, are you ready?

'This sport's been going on
over 2,000 years,

'and clearly, they still love
a good dust-up.'

Now, they will show you
how to become...

'Last time I saw wrestling

'was on Saturday afternoon telly
in the '70s.

'Now I finally see it in the flesh.'

In the beginning...

'And I'm seeing quite
a lot of flesh.'

You've definitely got the look.
It's fabulous.

Butsukari-geiko is the last
of the daily training.

'There's just one rule.

'Aneko explains that whoever's
pushed out of the ring first loses.'

Back to the ring.

Go, go, go, go!

Go, go, go!

SHOUTS IN JAPANESE

OK, the first win goes to...

'Audience participation's
encouraged,

'so after that demo,
it's time for me to suit up.'

This in't right.

They don't have lady sumos.

Oh, hello.

Get my agent on the phone.

Are you ready?
Of course!

OK. And you are?
I'm Jane.

From?
England.

OK. So, our first brave and
beautiful opponent of the day is...

Jane from UK!
Let's give her a big hand!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you, thank you.

OK. So, now...

'Yes, I know what you're thinking.

'And, yes,
my bum DOES look big in this.'

And to your right-hand side,
you give a stomp.

Ha!
Yes!

Yes, yes!

OK, now you are ready for the match.

'I like her optimism.'

I think so.

Go, Jane, go, go, go!

Go, go, go, go!

Go push him, go!

Push him, yes!
Push him out, push him out!

OK.
Push him out.

Push him! Push him more!

Go!

JANE LAUGHS

'Forty-eight hours ago,
I was settling down for my soaps.

'Now look at me.'

Go! Push him out!

Push, push, push, push! Go!

Go, go, go!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

One more push! OK!

GONG,
APPLAUSE

The first winner is Jane!

'You can hear the crowd
are going wild.'

Yeah!
Oh, my God.

OK, now...

That is a lot harder than you think.
He's built like a brick...

He's built really strong, him.
You know, they just...

They just stand there,
and you can't push 'em or anything.

But I won in the end
cos that's how it is.

'Coming up,

'I discover the Japanese love
a French maid cafe,

'but it's all good clean fun...
honest.'

It's just the most surreal place
I've ever been in my life.

'And forget J-pop,
I give you Jane-pop,

'here in the birthplace of karaoke.'

# Go on, now, go

# Walk out the door... #

HIGH-PITCHED: # I will survive! #

'I'm doing a cultural tour of Japan.

'I started in Tokyo, which is
everything I'd hoped for and more.'

'A mix of the strangely familiar,
and just the plain old strange,

'and if it's manic by day,

'it shifts up a whole other gear
once the sun sets.'

And we're going to something
called a maid's cafe,

which is really, really popular
here in Akihabara.

It's about dressing up.

'There are a whole bunch of these
themed cafes here

'in the central Akihabara district.

'But if I were expecting
a Betty's Tea Room,

'my guidebook's put me right.

'They're more like going
through the looking glass

'into another world.'

I've no idea what to expect here.

But it looks like this is it.

'I'm on the lookout
for Tokyoite Tomi,

'who's going to be my date.

'Presumably not kitted out
as a maid.'

Ah!
Hi, Jane, sorry!

It's OK.
Making you wait.

It's OK, come on in.
Thank you.

How are you?
Very good, thank you.

How are you?
Very well.

'The idea of maid cafes
made me think of the 1970s.

'Carry On saucy maid shenanigans?
Surely not.'

Shall we go in?
Yes, Princess Jane.

SHE LAUGHS
I'm Master Tomi.

Really?
Maid cafe, princess and master.

Oh, is that right?

Am I a princess today?
Yes!

Yes.
I'm master.

You're a master.
Yes.

Oh, nice.
Let's go inside our castle.

OK, Master Tomi. Fantastic.

'We're stepping into
a real-life experience of anime.

'It might seem bonkers to Brits,
but it's based on fun.'

So, you spend a wonderful date
as a master and a princess,

and you are the role model
as princess.

THEY LAUGH

It's just the most surreal place
I've ever been in my life.

I can't believe this is happening.
Yeah.

I know what you're thinking.

If we see someone in a maid's
outfit back in the UK,

it's got a different connotation.

Mm-hm. But here,
that's not the case, is it?

No.
It's very family-orientated?

Yeah. Exactly.
It's cute, it's fun.

It's an innocent...

Very innocent.
It's very innocent here.

Yeah, because we are innocent.
Of course. Of course.

So it's completely different to
what you think it's going to be.

'I've seen many things
in my life before,

'but this is another level.

'And we get to order pudding.'

"Sweet Little Princess Sundae"!

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

So, when we have one bite
from the parfait,

we're gonna get
17 years old forever.

So, I'll look 17 years old?

Yeah, so, we're gonna stay
at 17 years old.

Oh, fantastic.

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

"Moe moe" is cute.

Cute? Moe moe.
It's a slang word.

Moe moe, and we are cute, too.
Yeah, you are.

Well, I think we're cute.

JANE CHUCKLES

It's moe moe water!

Yeah, moe water!
Moe water!

THEY CHEER

'Even the coffee's served up
with a dose of cuteness.

'In Wakey, we just get a biscuit
on the side.'

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

So, we're gonna make the drinks
shake-shake together.

OK.
Yeah.

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

So, we're gonna repeat
the same word as she says. OK.

'OK, here we go.'

Moe, moe!

Moe, moe!

'It's a bit reminiscent of a sitdown
hokey cokey, Japanese-style.'

Zaka, zaka!
BOTH: Zaka, zaka!

Doki, doki!
Doki, doki!

Waku, waku!
Waku, waku!

'I have no idea what's happening
any more,

'but I'm kinda getting into it.'

THEY CHEER

Thank you.

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

Even though the drink's
already delicious,

we can make them more delicious
by making some magic.

OK.

Make heart.

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

Moe, moe!
Moe!

Moe, moe, chu!

Kyuu!
Kyuu!

Kyuu!
Yes!

Moe, moe, kyuu!
MAID SQUEALS

JANE LAUGHS

'Believe it or not, there's nothing
stronger than sugar in my shake,

'but this place has got me
right giddy.'

Am I dreaming?
THEY LAUGH

Is this a dream?

But actually getting into it,
it's fun.

SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

Thank you!
I love her, she's so cute.

That's cos you're moe!

Dah!

THEY CHEER

Well done!
Thank you.

'We're now performing a magic spell
to fill the food with love.

'I literally cannot believe
I have just said that sentence.'

ALL: Ooh!
SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE

Moe!

'I blame it all
on this ma-hoo-sive sugar rush.'

Thank you. Thank you.
IN JAPANESE: Thank you.

SHE CHUCKLES

It's just like being a child!
HE LAUGHS

It tastes like being a child.
Yeah.

You know,
Japan is full of adventures,

but this has probably been
one of the most...

different things I've ever done.

Come and let yourself be cute.

But this crazy night's not over.

Fuelled by the sugar rush, Tomi's
run ahead to set up another surprise

while I'm escorted there by Frank.

Where you taking me now?

We are doing karaoke.
Karaoke?

Indeed. You cannot visit Tokyo

without having
a proper karaoke session,

and here we are.

SHE LAUGHS
OK. Please, come on in.

'Now, this is right up my alley.'

Oh, wow!
Here you go.

Oh, my God, you get a room.

SHE LAUGHS
Oh, wow, a stage in it. Oh, my.

ALL: Hey!
Oh, hello!

Nice to meet you.

'Tomi's brought his mates, so it
won't just be me hogging the mic."

ALL: Kampai!

So, what do you do?
Just get up and sing, or...?

Yeah, the stage is there.
We can sit from the table,

but maybe this stage
is more inviting and...

Yeah.
We can...

Shall we sing, then?
Right. Let's do it.

Yeah? All right, come on, let's go.

'This is great fun,
and I'm getting flashbacks.

'You can take Jane
out of the cruise ship,

'but you can't take the cruise
ship out of Jane.'

ECHOES: One, one, two.

Ooh, I like this!
THEY LAUGH

So, Jane, what would you like
to sing for us?

Well, I Will Survive.

OK, I Will Survive.
Big disco track, yeah.

To go with the disco ball.

'I mean, who doesn't love a Gloria
Gaynor moment? It's a classic!'

# First I was afraid
I was petrified

# Kept thinking I could never live
Without you by my side

# Go on, now, go, walk out the door

OPERATIC: # Don't turn around
You're not welcome any more

ALL: # I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give

BOTH: # I will survive

# I will survi-i-i-ive! #

'There are dogs in Kyoto
who can hear that.'

That's incredible. Incredible.

Oh, I'd forgotten
how much fun this is.

'On that note,
I think we'll call it a night.

'Tokyo, what a way to start.'

Wow.

'This city's so big, brazen,
and brilliant.'

It's crazy, it's fantastic!

'So full of warmth, wit,
and welcome...'

Aw!
THEY LAUGH

'..that I'm sticking around to
discover even more of what makes it

'and its extraordinary people tick.

'So, join me next time

when I meet waiters with wires
in a robot cafe...'

Wakefield is a city
in West Yorkshire.

'..visit a world-famous fish market

'where the seafood crackers are,
well, crackers.'

SHE LAUGHS
That's hot!

'And I channel my inner warrior...'
HE SHOUTS

'..when I venture
deep into a ninja village.'

SHE LAUGHS