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1
00:00:10,243 --> 00:00:13,412
Ray, wake up.
Ray, wake up.
2
00:00:13,414 --> 00:00:16,248
- Wake up!
- There's pudding everywhere.
3
00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:21,954
Ray, I think I hear something.
4
00:00:23,156 --> 00:00:25,391
Does it sound like you talking?
5
00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:29,395
Come on.
Ray, I'm serious.
6
00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:31,430
All right, all right.
7
00:00:33,199 --> 00:00:35,167
How come I'm
the noise checker-outer?
8
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:37,202
Because it would look
pathetic on the news
9
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:39,939
if I were beaten up
while you were sleeping.
10
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:42,474
Careful, honey,
it could be dangerous.
11
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:44,476
- Yeah.
- And, Ray--
12
00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:48,080
If it's nothing dangerous,
could you get me a yogurt?
13
00:00:50,417 --> 00:00:52,084
Yeah.
14
00:00:52,086 --> 00:00:55,955
You know, in fact,
get me a yogurt either way.
15
00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:02,227
Hi, I'm Ray,
and I live here in Long Island
16
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:03,662
with my wife, Debra.
17
00:01:03,664 --> 00:01:07,266
She's great with the kids,
the house, everything.
18
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:09,168
Oh, I don't know
how she does it.
19
00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:14,306
We've got a daughter, Ally,
and twin two-year-old boys.
20
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:16,608
It's not really about the kids.
21
00:01:16,610 --> 00:01:19,611
My parents live
across the street.
22
00:01:19,613 --> 00:01:24,283
That's right,
and my brother lives with them.
23
00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:27,386
Now, not every family would go by
on a conveyer belt for you,
24
00:01:27,388 --> 00:01:29,288
but mine would,
because--
25
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:31,323
Everybody loves Raymond.
26
00:01:31,325 --> 00:01:33,325
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
27
00:01:34,749 --> 00:01:40,749
Sync by XhmikosR
www.addic7ed.com
28
00:01:42,469 --> 00:01:43,702
Hey, Nemo.
29
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:46,705
Hey, there.
Steinbrenner sucks.
30
00:01:47,707 --> 00:01:49,208
Thanks for the scoop.
31
00:01:49,210 --> 00:01:50,309
Hey, come here.
32
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:51,543
I thought we'd eat at
the booth today.
33
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:54,413
Why, are you
breaking up with me?
34
00:01:56,049 --> 00:01:57,516
Ha, ha, ha.
Just shut up and sit over there.
35
00:01:57,518 --> 00:02:00,352
Come on, trust me.
36
00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:02,021
You won't be disappointed.
37
00:02:05,158 --> 00:02:07,659
And we have liftoff.
38
00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:08,794
Hi.
39
00:02:11,197 --> 00:02:12,197
Something to drink first?
40
00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:14,333
Uh--
41
00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:16,035
Beer.
42
00:02:16,037 --> 00:02:17,036
It's a little early.
43
00:02:17,038 --> 00:02:18,437
I like it with pizza.
44
00:02:18,439 --> 00:02:20,572
But I don't know, what
do you think I should have?
45
00:02:20,574 --> 00:02:23,342
Because I'll change it.
46
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,711
I drink eight glasses
of water a day.
47
00:02:25,713 --> 00:02:27,746
Water.
I'll have water.
48
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:30,115
Pitcher of water.
Okay.
49
00:02:30,117 --> 00:02:32,051
And you?
Yeah, okay, water.
50
00:02:32,053 --> 00:02:33,719
I'll just start
with a glass, though.
51
00:02:35,422 --> 00:02:37,456
And then what,
we're going to have the usual?
52
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:41,326
I just started on Saturday.
Nobody has a usual yet.
53
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,697
It's four slices,
everything on it.
54
00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,633
That should be an occasional.
55
00:02:51,272 --> 00:02:55,841
How about that?
That's Nemo's niece, Angelina.
56
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:58,077
I think she was standing
a little close.
57
00:02:58,079 --> 00:02:59,378
Man, look at her.
58
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,380
If I wasn't married,
you know what I'd do?
59
00:03:01,382 --> 00:03:03,816
Wear the same underwear
every day.
60
00:03:06,719 --> 00:03:09,354
Come on, Ray.
You don't think she's hot?
61
00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:10,789
Yeah, all right,
she's all right. Relax.
62
00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:13,192
You're going to pull a muscle.
63
00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:14,693
She's all right?
64
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:17,096
She's built like the lady
from the mudflaps.
65
00:03:17,098 --> 00:03:18,831
The mudflaps? What?
66
00:03:18,833 --> 00:03:20,532
You know, the lady
you see on the trucks.
67
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:21,567
You know, like this.
68
00:03:21,569 --> 00:03:24,103
Don't you do it.
69
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:27,873
Your order will be up
in just one minute.
70
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:31,477
Ohh.
Did you smell her?
71
00:03:31,479 --> 00:03:34,313
No, I--
I read the sign, Bernie:
72
00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:36,582
"Thank you for not
smelling the help."
73
00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:40,486
- Yep, here you go.
- Thank you.
74
00:03:40,488 --> 00:03:42,721
Thanks, Angelina.
Thank you. Thanks.
75
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:44,289
Ask for parmesan.
76
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:45,357
- No.
- Just go ahead.
77
00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:46,358
- I don't want parmesan.
- Angelina?
78
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:47,359
Yeah?
79
00:03:47,361 --> 00:03:50,129
Just a smidgen
of grated parmesan, please.
80
00:03:50,131 --> 00:03:52,564
- Okay.
- Wait. A smidgen?
81
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,400
Oh, you can't
control yourself, can you?
82
00:03:55,402 --> 00:03:57,302
I cannot.
83
00:03:57,304 --> 00:03:58,904
Say when.
84
00:04:17,824 --> 00:04:19,491
When.
85
00:04:21,628 --> 00:04:23,462
Give me your water.
86
00:04:31,804 --> 00:04:33,805
Hello?
87
00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:36,208
Yes, he is.
May I ask who's calling?
88
00:04:36,210 --> 00:04:37,743
Okay, just a minute.
Angelina.
89
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:39,278
Angelina?
90
00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:44,616
Don't know anyone by that name.
91
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:47,753
Uh, does he know
what this is regarding?
92
00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:49,588
Okay. Yeah.
Thanks for calling.
93
00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:50,923
Bye-bye.
94
00:04:50,925 --> 00:04:53,625
- She's got your wallet.
- My--my wallet?
95
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,761
Yeah.
It's at Nemo's.
96
00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:57,930
I didn't go to Nemo's.
97
00:05:02,835 --> 00:05:05,904
Well, your wallet
made it there somehow.
98
00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:07,606
Do you have your wallet?
99
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:12,644
Ray, she said
she just waited on you.
100
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:15,847
Oh, Nemo's. Nemo's.
Yeah, yeah.
101
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:18,450
There might have been
a waitress over there, yeah.
102
00:05:18,452 --> 00:05:20,285
Even though we usually
go to the counter.
103
00:05:20,287 --> 00:05:23,255
But today, Nemo,
he forced us into this table,
104
00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:25,624
Where the waitresses go.
105
00:05:25,626 --> 00:05:26,892
So we had to
have a waitress--
106
00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:29,695
Not "have" a waitress.
107
00:05:29,697 --> 00:05:32,631
We had, uh, waitress service.
108
00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:34,666
So how pretty is she?
109
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,335
I didn't say she was pretty.
110
00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:38,337
You didn't have to.
111
00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:40,339
You're being
so defensive about it.
112
00:05:40,341 --> 00:05:42,741
My gosh, you'd think
something was going on.
113
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:44,710
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
114
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:47,846
Ha, ha, ha.
115
00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:50,849
Ah!
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
116
00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:52,718
No, no, no, no.
117
00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,921
No, no, no.
118
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:58,023
You're a freak.
119
00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:00,525
What? What did I do?
What did I do?
120
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,996
I mean, look, Ray,
if you saw someone pretty today,
121
00:06:03,998 --> 00:06:04,997
you can tell me.
122
00:06:04,999 --> 00:06:06,665
I saw nothing.
123
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:09,434
Oh, wow!
She must be beautiful.
124
00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:11,036
Look, she's Nemo's niece.
125
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:13,939
How beautiful can she be, huh?
126
00:06:13,941 --> 00:06:16,608
You've seen Nemo.
127
00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:19,911
All right, look, some men
might find her attractive.
128
00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:22,381
Nothing like you, though.
129
00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:23,715
That--
130
00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:27,519
Which means that you are
the more attractive one.
131
00:06:27,521 --> 00:06:31,356
I--I have the right
to an attorney.
132
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,464
Okay, so she's beautiful.
133
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,333
That's all I wanted to know.
No big deal.
134
00:06:41,335 --> 00:06:44,970
All right, good.
So it's over, done.
135
00:06:45,372 --> 00:06:47,039
All right, what's for dinner?
136
00:06:47,041 --> 00:06:48,507
Lasagna.
137
00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:50,575
Aha.
138
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:52,010
So would you sleep with her
if we weren't married?
139
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:53,845
Oh, what?
No!
140
00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:56,048
No. No, no.
141
00:06:56,050 --> 00:06:58,583
Let's just pretend
I didn't exist.
142
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:01,386
I don't like this ride.
It's scary.
143
00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:05,424
What are you afraid of?
144
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:21,373
Look, if you didn't exist,
145
00:07:21,375 --> 00:07:24,676
I'd never meet another woman,
because I'd be a sailor.
146
00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:25,911
I'd sail.
147
00:07:25,913 --> 00:07:28,580
I'd just sail
around the world by myself,
148
00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:31,883
married to the salt
and the sea.
149
00:07:31,885 --> 00:07:34,753
Oh, man, okay, just forget it.
150
00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:36,588
Good grief, I was just kidding.
151
00:07:36,590 --> 00:07:38,023
All right.
152
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:43,495
Okay, so you're a sailor.
153
00:07:43,497 --> 00:07:45,030
You--you pull into
the port of Queens
154
00:07:45,032 --> 00:07:49,568
To take on supplies,
and you go ashore to Nemo's.
155
00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:52,137
You know, you're lonely
from this long journey,
156
00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:55,107
and you come upon
this lovely pizza wench.
157
00:07:56,976 --> 00:07:58,844
Would you sleep with her?
158
00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:01,713
You don't exist?
159
00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:03,014
It's like
"It's a wonderful life."
160
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:05,350
There's no Debra.
161
00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:07,686
Well, then it's not
a wonderful life, is it?
162
00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:09,755
Oh, ha, ha.
163
00:08:17,063 --> 00:08:19,865
How many months
have I been at sea?
164
00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:21,767
Mmm, seven.
165
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,468
And there's no wind,
there's nothing.
166
00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:25,137
I'm just stuck there
for a long time?
167
00:08:25,139 --> 00:08:29,408
No me, no wind, stuck on shore.
168
00:08:29,410 --> 00:08:32,744
Well, then, sure, yeah.
169
00:08:32,746 --> 00:08:35,180
I guess so.
170
00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:38,884
Break out the funky
cold medina.
171
00:08:45,491 --> 00:08:47,592
I'll take that as a yes.
172
00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:50,028
Okay?
173
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,463
Yep, sure.
Fine.
174
00:08:51,465 --> 00:08:53,799
So, what kind--
What kind of sauce?
175
00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:55,100
Meat sauce or--
176
00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:02,441
Or should I just eat
out of a bowl on the porch?
177
00:09:03,843 --> 00:09:05,744
You didn't exist!
178
00:09:13,717 --> 00:09:14,784
You sure you aren't hungry?
179
00:09:14,786 --> 00:09:19,221
Hey, Ray, does this
smell funny to you?
180
00:09:20,424 --> 00:09:23,292
Yeah. Yeah.
181
00:09:23,294 --> 00:09:25,327
Okay, no charge.
182
00:09:30,067 --> 00:09:32,501
Look, I'm here to get
my wallet, that's it.
183
00:09:32,503 --> 00:09:34,770
I'm just getting my wallet.
You're my witness.
184
00:09:37,741 --> 00:09:40,676
- You hungry yet?
- No, no, no.
185
00:09:40,678 --> 00:09:42,812
Then just come sit with me.
Come on.
186
00:09:45,382 --> 00:09:47,149
What are you looking
so guilty about?
187
00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:49,452
That's my natural look.
188
00:09:49,654 --> 00:09:50,853
Look, lighten up, Ray.
189
00:09:50,855 --> 00:09:53,355
You didn't do anything wrong.
190
00:09:53,357 --> 00:09:54,857
Let me tell you
something, Bernie.
191
00:09:54,859 --> 00:09:57,426
This has been bothering me.
192
00:09:57,428 --> 00:10:02,164
I did not need
that much parmesan cheese.
193
00:10:05,139 --> 00:10:06,606
Hi.
I'm glad you're here.
194
00:10:06,608 --> 00:10:10,110
- You are?
- Here you go.
195
00:10:10,112 --> 00:10:13,680
You got cute kids there.
196
00:10:13,682 --> 00:10:14,681
I'll be right back.
197
00:10:14,683 --> 00:10:17,349
Oh, man, you are golden.
198
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,484
You know who she smells like?
199
00:10:19,486 --> 00:10:21,586
Do you remember Carla Demeco
from high school?
200
00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:24,389
Oh, yeah.
Carla Demeco.
201
00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:26,557
She smelled like vanilla--
202
00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:29,794
And--and apple,
and strawberry.
203
00:10:29,796 --> 00:10:34,565
The syrup caddie
at the house of pancakes.
204
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:37,035
Let's go there later.
205
00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:40,204
- Hello, ladies.
- Hey!
206
00:10:40,206 --> 00:10:43,742
- Dad, what are you doing here?
- Hey, let me in.
207
00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:46,411
- Dad, why are you here?
- Hee, hee, hee.
208
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:49,080
I came to see the new waitress.
209
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,582
Oh, god, dad!
210
00:10:51,584 --> 00:10:54,719
Hey, relax.
I'm having lunch.
211
00:10:54,721 --> 00:10:57,221
Hi, will you be joining them?
212
00:10:57,223 --> 00:11:00,325
Holy crap!
213
00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:03,061
Uh, uh, yes, yes, I will.
Thank you.
214
00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:04,462
Okay.
215
00:11:04,464 --> 00:11:06,097
What can I get for you?
216
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:08,833
I'll have a meatball
sandwich, dear.
217
00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:10,735
And to drink?
218
00:11:10,737 --> 00:11:14,272
A non-alcoholic beer,
s'il vous plaît.
219
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,707
I think she's got a little
crush on your boy here.
220
00:11:16,709 --> 00:11:18,443
Hey, you better watch it.
221
00:11:18,445 --> 00:11:20,711
What's the matter with you?
Does Debra know?
222
00:11:20,713 --> 00:11:22,547
What?
There's nothing to know.
223
00:11:22,549 --> 00:11:23,781
Ray left his wallet
here yesterday,
224
00:11:23,783 --> 00:11:26,684
When Angelina found it, she
called the house looking for Ray.
225
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:28,553
Jeez-aloo!
226
00:11:28,555 --> 00:11:30,455
Hey, you denied
noticing her, right?
227
00:11:30,457 --> 00:11:33,091
I tried, but Debra can tell
when I'm lying.
228
00:11:33,093 --> 00:11:35,560
Then we had to discuss it.
229
00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:37,728
You don't know what you're
messing with here, do you?
230
00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:39,797
You could get hit
by the thunderbolt.
231
00:11:39,799 --> 00:11:42,366
- What's that?
- The thunderbolt.
232
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:46,637
You see somebody, and then--
Ba-boom!
233
00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:50,775
Before you know it,
you're in big trouble.
234
00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:52,376
It's in your blood.
235
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:54,745
- All right.
- I can't go into detail.
236
00:11:56,181 --> 00:11:59,584
Here you go, large meatball.
237
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:02,286
That's what
we call him at home.
238
00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:04,755
How about you?
Do you need anything?
239
00:12:04,757 --> 00:12:05,857
No.
240
00:12:08,193 --> 00:12:10,128
You see?
You see?
241
00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:11,762
- You better watch it.
- I really didn't--
242
00:12:11,764 --> 00:12:13,197
Until you learn to
keep a poker face,
243
00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:15,233
you don't come in here anymore.
244
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,201
You're off Nemo's.
Just forget about it.
245
00:12:17,203 --> 00:12:19,804
No more pizza, you understand?
246
00:12:19,806 --> 00:12:22,273
- Uh, sweetheart?
- Yeah?
247
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:25,276
Could I have a little
parmesan over here, please?
248
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:31,449
Hello, dear.
249
00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:32,650
Well, hi.
How are you?
250
00:12:32,652 --> 00:12:34,519
Good. Good.
251
00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:36,487
Oh, where are the children?
252
00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:38,723
Oh, I got them plugged in.
253
00:12:38,725 --> 00:12:42,160
Barney's in charge
for the next half hour.
254
00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:43,761
Well, enjoy your break.
255
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,596
You deserve it, honey.
256
00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:46,931
I remember before television,
257
00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:49,600
we actually had to be
with the kids.
258
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:50,768
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
259
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:56,507
So how you doing?
260
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:58,442
I'm fine.
Why?
261
00:12:58,444 --> 00:12:59,844
Well, have you been
getting enough rest?
262
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:02,547
'Cause you look a little tired.
263
00:13:02,549 --> 00:13:04,649
Well, occupational hazard.
264
00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:06,717
Ha, ha, ha.
Boy.
265
00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:08,386
Oh, boy, honey, I know.
266
00:13:08,388 --> 00:13:10,321
I've been there.
Ha, ha.
267
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,390
Have you ever wondered why, uh,
268
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:15,626
Frank and I have
such a good relationship?
269
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,295
No.
270
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:21,299
Well, you know, it's because
I know the importance
271
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,501
of keeping up my appearance.
272
00:13:23,503 --> 00:13:24,936
Huh?
273
00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:27,471
Here's something I use
274
00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:30,341
for those little wrinkles
around the eyes.
275
00:13:30,343 --> 00:13:34,212
Marie, this is
hemorrhoid cream.
276
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:38,716
It stings a little,
but it really works, see?
277
00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:41,552
You might want to try it.
278
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:44,956
So how are things
between you and Ray?
279
00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:46,857
Well, I'm not sure
we need this.
280
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,693
Oh. Ha, ha, ha.
281
00:13:48,695 --> 00:13:51,429
Well, you know me, Debra.
282
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:54,799
I'm the last person
to want to cause any trouble.
283
00:13:54,801 --> 00:13:56,867
But, uh--
284
00:13:56,869 --> 00:13:59,637
I, uh, I've heard some things.
285
00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:01,706
Things?
286
00:14:01,708 --> 00:14:05,943
Marie, all Ray did was
leave his wallet at Nemo's.
287
00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:09,347
Ooh, I said too much.
Maybe I should go.
288
00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:11,515
I was never here.
289
00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:13,784
Marie, I'm not
worried about Ray.
290
00:14:13,786 --> 00:14:15,720
Oh, I trust Ray too.
291
00:14:15,722 --> 00:14:18,856
I don't trust that
pizza parlor puttana.
292
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,391
Here, a gift.
293
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:21,626
Hey!
294
00:14:21,628 --> 00:14:23,394
Hey, Marie,
we're starving over there.
295
00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:26,364
Okay, okay.
Good luck, honey.
296
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,733
I don't need good luck.
297
00:14:28,735 --> 00:14:31,302
There's nothing
going on, you know?
298
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:32,503
Marie, what's she
talking about?
299
00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:35,740
Nothing! We were just
having a discussion.
300
00:14:35,742 --> 00:14:37,775
Marie, you're killing me
with your yapper.
301
00:14:37,777 --> 00:14:40,411
Oh, no, it's not for you, dear.
302
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:41,812
It's for Debra.
303
00:14:41,814 --> 00:14:44,649
Oh.
Sorry.
304
00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:58,729
You know, I appreciate
the concern, and the gift,
305
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:02,366
but, you know, I really think
this is between Ray and I.
306
00:15:02,368 --> 00:15:04,869
Oh, is this about
Raymond and the tramp?
307
00:15:06,338 --> 00:15:08,306
- Hey, everybody.
- Hey.
308
00:15:08,308 --> 00:15:09,640
- Hi, Ray.
- Hey, Ray.
309
00:15:13,612 --> 00:15:15,513
I'm starving.
310
00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:20,451
What--what's that
I smell there, meat loaf?
311
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:23,921
Yeah, but, um,
that's for tomorrow.
312
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,324
I was thinking we could
go to Nemo's tonight.
313
00:15:33,932 --> 00:15:36,334
What did you do?
314
00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:38,736
Nothing; we were
just having a discussion.
315
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:39,937
Oh, no.
316
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:42,440
But it's over now,
'cause you're going out to dinner.
317
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:43,674
Come on, let's go.
318
00:15:48,580 --> 00:15:51,949
Oh, what a tangled web
we weave.
319
00:15:59,224 --> 00:16:01,159
You sure this is
a good idea, honey?
320
00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:03,528
Pizza could be fattening.
321
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:06,297
Not that you have to worry,
not with your great figure.
322
00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:09,333
Oh--
323
00:16:09,335 --> 00:16:11,702
Boy, I can't wait
to get you home.
324
00:16:16,842 --> 00:16:18,676
Hey, hey, Suzy.
325
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:20,378
Uh, we're ready--
We're going to order right now.
326
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:23,347
Oh, you brought
the kids tonight.
327
00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:24,515
I'm on break.
328
00:16:24,517 --> 00:16:25,550
Wait, wait--
329
00:16:25,552 --> 00:16:28,186
Angelina, table four.
330
00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:29,487
Oh, hi, Ray.
331
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:32,423
Oh, hi, uh, waitress.
332
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:36,727
Oh, look, kids, fire.
333
00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:39,297
Hi, I think we spoke
on the phone earlier.
334
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:41,466
- I'm Angelina. Hi.
- Oh, hi.
335
00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:42,767
I'm sorry, that was rude of me.
336
00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:45,670
This is Debra, the little lady.
337
00:16:45,672 --> 00:16:47,805
I don't mean little
in a size way
338
00:16:47,807 --> 00:16:49,774
or little that
she doesn't matter.
339
00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:55,313
She's my big lady.
She's my great big lady.
340
00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:56,848
It's nice to meet you.
341
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:58,683
You want your usual?
342
00:16:58,685 --> 00:17:01,252
Ha, ha.
Like I have a usual.
343
00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:05,189
Go ahead, Ray,
just get your usual.
344
00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:08,860
It's Bernie's.
It's Bernie's usual. Uh--
345
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:13,264
I'm going to go
with Italian food.
346
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:23,708
And what about you, my bride?
347
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:26,577
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
348
00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:29,380
Uh, we're going to have
a large cheese pizza.
349
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,581
I need three milks
for the kids.
350
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:35,319
And he needs something
to drink right away.
351
00:17:35,321 --> 00:17:36,787
And I'll have a salad, thanks.
352
00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:39,657
Okay. Coming right up.
Thanks.
353
00:17:41,860 --> 00:17:43,328
All right, well, she is pretty.
354
00:17:43,330 --> 00:17:45,396
I can see why you made
such a big deal about her.
355
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,632
I didn't make
a big deal about her.
356
00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:49,433
You did; you made
the big deal about her.
357
00:17:49,435 --> 00:17:50,902
Yeah, you're the one.
358
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:54,372
You're the one who put me in
the ocean and killed yourself.
359
00:17:54,374 --> 00:17:57,308
And you kept me out there for
seven months, a lonely sailor.
360
00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:58,476
You made me do it.
361
00:17:58,478 --> 00:18:00,411
You made me sleep with her.
362
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,812
Oh, hello.
363
00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:05,349
Daddy's sweating.
364
00:18:06,652 --> 00:18:08,753
Do you mind?
365
00:18:08,755 --> 00:18:11,556
Help her.
What's the matter with you?
366
00:18:15,227 --> 00:18:16,561
Oh, I forgot.
367
00:18:16,563 --> 00:18:20,531
- You like parmesan!
- No! No, parmesan.
368
00:18:39,918 --> 00:18:42,253
Unless you want parmesan.
369
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:48,593
What are you doing
in there, honey?
370
00:18:48,595 --> 00:18:50,328
Nothing.
Nothing.
371
00:18:51,864 --> 00:18:54,332
Wow!
That really does sting.
372
00:18:57,469 --> 00:18:59,737
Listen, I'm sorry
about tonight.
373
00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:02,240
I was a jerk.
374
00:19:02,242 --> 00:19:03,307
Just tell me one thing, Ray.
375
00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:05,309
Do you wish
I looked like Angelina?
376
00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:07,311
No, no.
377
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:08,813
Of course not.
378
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:10,781
How could I tell you apart?
379
00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:14,585
What is it with you guys?
380
00:19:14,587 --> 00:19:17,188
Why is it when one of you
sees a pretty girl,
381
00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:20,358
He becomes a basket case?
382
00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:23,461
Why is how a woman looks
the most important thing?
383
00:19:23,463 --> 00:19:25,530
That's god's way.
384
00:19:25,532 --> 00:19:28,399
That's why the eyes
are in front.
385
00:19:28,401 --> 00:19:30,234
If what a woman said
was the most important,
386
00:19:30,236 --> 00:19:34,205
Then the ears would be here.
387
00:19:34,207 --> 00:19:35,573
That's just natural selection.
388
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:39,343
There were guys like that,
but they died out.
389
00:19:41,246 --> 00:19:43,714
Well, I just thought
you were different.
390
00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:45,883
I am different.
391
00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:48,519
I am different.
I'm very special.
392
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:49,754
Ohh.
393
00:19:50,756 --> 00:19:52,757
You know that.
394
00:19:52,759 --> 00:19:56,661
How many men do you know
can do this?
395
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:06,404
Boom!
396
00:20:20,686 --> 00:20:23,454
Who are you?
397
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:25,790
Come on, huh--ow.
398
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,725
This is no big deal.
399
00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:29,527
You looking around
is not a big deal?
400
00:20:29,529 --> 00:20:31,796
I didn't look around.
I looked.
401
00:20:31,798 --> 00:20:34,599
I looked, that's all.
There's no "around."
402
00:20:34,601 --> 00:20:37,335
And there never will be.
403
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:39,770
I'm sure you look around
once in a while.
404
00:20:39,772 --> 00:20:41,539
No, women are--
Women are different.
405
00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:43,674
Yeah, you never found
another guy attractive?
406
00:20:43,676 --> 00:20:46,544
- No.
- Really?
407
00:20:46,546 --> 00:20:47,778
- Well--
- Come on!
408
00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:49,780
Oh, I don't know.
409
00:20:49,782 --> 00:20:51,749
Oh, well, maybe.
410
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,317
Who?
411
00:20:53,319 --> 00:20:57,421
Who? Who?
Who do you look at?
412
00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:58,556
All right, look, if it helps,
413
00:20:58,558 --> 00:21:01,826
I'm dead, and you're a sailor.
414
00:21:01,828 --> 00:21:05,830
Okay, well,
there's that Chuck Wilson.
415
00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:08,332
Chuck Wilson?
At my paper?
416
00:21:08,334 --> 00:21:09,834
- The columnist?
- Yeah. Yeah.
417
00:21:09,836 --> 00:21:11,569
You know, his picture
is right across from yours,
418
00:21:11,571 --> 00:21:13,838
and, uh, he's kind of cute.
419
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:14,905
- Wilson?
- Yeah.
420
00:21:14,907 --> 00:21:18,676
Oh, god,
he's a fat load, Wilson.
421
00:21:18,678 --> 00:21:20,378
Well, he doesn't look fat
in his picture.
422
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:21,712
That's from the head up.
423
00:21:21,714 --> 00:21:25,349
I'm telling you, from the
neck down, he's a carnival.
424
00:21:25,351 --> 00:21:27,551
Wilson? God.
425
00:21:27,553 --> 00:21:29,787
I thought you were going to say
Bon Jovi or something.
426
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:33,491
Oh, right.
Like I'm ever going to meet him.
427
00:21:33,493 --> 00:21:35,926
Well, you sure as hell aren't
going to meet Chuck Wilson now.
428
00:21:35,928 --> 00:21:38,562
Oh, this is stupid, Ray.
Just forget it.
429
00:21:38,564 --> 00:21:40,731
Wilson.
Big fat Wilson.
430
00:21:40,733 --> 00:21:43,067
He's a pig.
431
00:21:43,069 --> 00:21:44,468
He's a fatty.
432
00:21:46,905 --> 00:21:49,006
He's got a curly tail.
433
00:21:50,609 --> 00:21:52,643
Soo-ey!
434
00:22:07,690 --> 00:22:09,457
Locking up.
435
00:22:35,718 --> 00:22:37,585
When.
436
00:22:38,209 --> 00:22:44,209
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