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1
00:00:12,133 --> 00:00:13,551
- [PERSON] Hello, there.
- Hey, there.
2
00:00:14,051 --> 00:00:15,685
- Hi, Ted.
- Howdy.
3
00:00:15,761 --> 00:00:17,773
Hey, Ted. Good luck this weekend.
4
00:00:17,784 --> 00:00:19,343
I appreciate you, Susan. [CHUCKLES]
5
00:00:19,354 --> 00:00:21,690
[IMITATES BARKING, CHUCKLES]
6
00:00:21,892 --> 00:00:24,561
Hey, Ms. Barnaby. Rough night?
7
00:00:24,812 --> 00:00:27,815
Ted, if it's not rough, it isn't fun.
8
00:00:27,815 --> 00:00:29,317
[GROWLS, CHUCKLES]
9
00:00:30,103 --> 00:00:31,354
Ooh, boy.
10
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:34,118
- Hiya.
- Hey, fellas. How you doing?
11
00:00:35,031 --> 00:00:37,190
- [PERSON 2] What's up, Coach?
- There she is.
12
00:00:37,201 --> 00:00:41,435
Hey, wanker. Don't get all cocky
and fuck up that streak you're on.
13
00:00:41,446 --> 00:00:42,747
What streak?
14
00:00:42,833 --> 00:00:45,502
- Go Richmond.
- Yes, sir. [CHUCKLES]
15
00:00:46,834 --> 00:00:47,877
Morning.
16
00:00:48,679 --> 00:00:50,220
Hey. How you doing?
17
00:00:55,194 --> 00:00:57,553
- Mom?
- Hey, Teddy.
18
00:00:58,971 --> 00:01:01,223
[THEME SONG PLAYS]
19
00:01:16,113 --> 00:01:21,220
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.addic7ed.com -
20
00:01:29,627 --> 00:01:31,504
Don't think the cleaners
actually cleaned the floor.
21
00:01:31,905 --> 00:01:33,269
There are no cleaners.
22
00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:35,344
So, why do we put the
chairs on the tables?
23
00:01:35,355 --> 00:01:36,783
The patriarchy.
24
00:01:36,794 --> 00:01:40,897
Oh, okay. Oh, well. I'll
just, um... just go get a broom.
25
00:01:41,931 --> 00:01:43,766
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
26
00:01:43,905 --> 00:01:45,782
[WHISPERS INDISTINCTLY]
27
00:01:46,341 --> 00:01:47,342
Hello.
28
00:01:47,353 --> 00:01:50,769
We're not open for another half
hour. Would you care to wait not here?
29
00:01:50,780 --> 00:01:51,786
- I'm sorry.
- Okay.
30
00:01:51,797 --> 00:01:53,423
- No, wait.
- [SIGHS]
31
00:01:53,434 --> 00:01:56,521
We're actually here to speak with
Nathan Shelley. He works here, yeah?
32
00:01:57,113 --> 00:02:01,200
- No such man exists.
- [NATHAN WHISTLES, HUMS]
33
00:02:02,159 --> 00:02:03,577
Oh, my God, it's true.
34
00:02:04,565 --> 00:02:07,110
[STAMMERS] How did you go
through your money so fast?
35
00:02:07,831 --> 00:02:09,892
Did you get addicted to the limelight?
36
00:02:09,903 --> 00:02:13,281
What? No. No, I just...
I just like working here.
37
00:02:14,338 --> 00:02:15,923
I like spending time with my girlfriend.
38
00:02:17,689 --> 00:02:18,940
She was right there.
39
00:02:18,951 --> 00:02:22,580
- That... That was my girlfriend. She...
- Mm-hmm. Okay.
40
00:02:23,222 --> 00:02:24,503
What are you guys doing here?
41
00:02:24,514 --> 00:02:26,266
We want you to come back to Richmond.
42
00:02:30,141 --> 00:02:32,513
- You do?
- Yeah, bruv.
43
00:02:32,524 --> 00:02:35,026
'Cause this shit here is sad as fuck.
44
00:02:36,152 --> 00:02:38,696
And a-all of you?
You want me to come...
45
00:02:39,280 --> 00:02:41,490
Yeah. It'll be good to have you back.
46
00:02:43,066 --> 00:02:45,662
The whole team talked
about it, and it was unanimous.
47
00:02:45,673 --> 00:02:47,171
Except for Bumbercatch.
48
00:02:47,506 --> 00:02:50,192
Who abstained because he's
passionately antidemocratic.
49
00:02:50,203 --> 00:02:51,830
Oh, yeah. [CHUCKLES]
50
00:02:51,841 --> 00:02:52,925
Yeah.
51
00:02:53,509 --> 00:02:56,310
So, what? Ted asked you guys
to come here to get me to come back?
52
00:02:56,321 --> 00:02:58,115
Uh, no, Ted doesn't know about it.
53
00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,706
Yeah, no, we wanted to ask
you to see if you wanted to come back
54
00:03:01,717 --> 00:03:03,260
before we approached Ted.
55
00:03:03,779 --> 00:03:05,115
Okay, well, sorry, guys.
56
00:03:05,126 --> 00:03:07,671
I don't think it's a good idea
for me to come back to Richmond, so...
57
00:03:07,682 --> 00:03:09,040
Thank you though.
58
00:03:10,252 --> 00:03:11,298
Oh.
59
00:03:12,365 --> 00:03:13,603
- Okay.
- Cool.
60
00:03:13,898 --> 00:03:15,566
Can I have 75 kebabs to go?
61
00:03:16,249 --> 00:03:19,531
Uh, yeah. Oh, yeah. No, of
course. Um, chicken, pork or lamb?
62
00:03:19,542 --> 00:03:20,627
Ooh.
63
00:03:21,739 --> 00:03:23,835
Or 25 of each? [STAMMERS]
64
00:03:23,985 --> 00:03:26,215
[CHUCKLES, FINGERS SNAP] Nate the Great.
65
00:03:26,226 --> 00:03:28,621
- [COLIN CHUCKLES] Yum.
- Okay.
66
00:03:28,621 --> 00:03:30,039
- Nice.
- Hey.
67
00:03:30,039 --> 00:03:32,182
- [NATHAN HUMMING]
- Thank you!
68
00:03:38,904 --> 00:03:41,251
_
69
00:03:42,705 --> 00:03:44,165
[MOM] Pretty sparse.
70
00:03:45,429 --> 00:03:47,640
- [PHONE CHIMES]
- [EXHALES HEAVILY]
71
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:50,184
Ooh. Mmm.
72
00:03:52,645 --> 00:03:55,248
What are all these crazy
symbols on your oven dial?
73
00:03:55,259 --> 00:03:57,257
[CHUCKLES] Yeah, um, well, the one with
74
00:03:57,267 --> 00:03:59,360
the line under the nuclear power symbol,
75
00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:00,966
that's for making cookies and chicken.
76
00:04:00,977 --> 00:04:03,864
The, uh, three squiggly
lines let you burn a frozen pizza.
77
00:04:03,864 --> 00:04:06,117
And the key symbol there,
that makes the whole thing beep
78
00:04:06,117 --> 00:04:08,156
until Beard comes
over and fixes it for me.
79
00:04:08,167 --> 00:04:09,418
Is everything okay, Mom?
80
00:04:09,595 --> 00:04:11,266
Oh, sure. I'm just looking around.
81
00:04:11,277 --> 00:04:14,503
No, no. No, I mean, you being
here in London. Is everything okay?
82
00:04:14,514 --> 00:04:16,460
- Oh, yeah. Everything's fine.
- Uh-huh.
83
00:04:16,471 --> 00:04:17,837
I just always wanted to see England,
84
00:04:17,837 --> 00:04:21,079
so I booked this trip as a little
Mother's Day gift to myself.
85
00:04:21,090 --> 00:04:24,185
Hmm. Okay. Well, um, I
mean, how long you been here?
86
00:04:24,196 --> 00:04:26,890
- Just a week.
- A week? Where the heck you staying?
87
00:04:26,901 --> 00:04:28,684
This adorable little hostel.
88
00:04:28,695 --> 00:04:30,694
- Mom...
- Now, I met so many Australians.
89
00:04:30,705 --> 00:04:32,693
They are backpacking through Europe.
90
00:04:32,704 --> 00:04:34,764
- Uh-huh.
- So much sex.
91
00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,526
- Mom.
- No, not me.
92
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,278
- The Australians.
- No, no, I get it. Okay.
93
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,879
Uh, well, look, how about you stay here
94
00:04:39,889 --> 00:04:41,011
for the rest of your trip, all right?
95
00:04:41,022 --> 00:04:42,389
Only if I'm not a hassle.
96
00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,649
You're not a hassle, Mom,
okay? Please stay here.
97
00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:46,286
- Okay.
- Okay, good. All right.
98
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:49,164
- Now, look, I gotta get to work.
- All righty. Have fun.
99
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:52,542
Um. You wanna tag along?
100
00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:55,879
- Well, I don't wanna be in your hair.
- Mom, I want you in my hair. Okay?
101
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:58,214
I want you in my friends'
and coworkers' hair.
102
00:04:58,225 --> 00:04:59,768
Now, please. Come on with.
103
00:04:59,779 --> 00:05:01,531
- Okay, thank you. I would like that.
- All right, good.
104
00:05:01,542 --> 00:05:03,248
You don't have to
bring your suitcase, Mom.
105
00:05:03,259 --> 00:05:06,092
- Okay. I'll just grab my coat...
- Yeah.
106
00:05:06,103 --> 00:05:10,274
... get my bag... [SINGSONGS]
... leave my worries on the doorstep.
107
00:05:10,285 --> 00:05:13,914
Yeah, just direct your
feet that way, Mom. Okay. [GROANS]
108
00:05:18,837 --> 00:05:22,340
Uh, Sam, Richmond
have won 15 matches in a row.
109
00:05:22,351 --> 00:05:24,228
With two games left,
you're just four points off
110
00:05:24,239 --> 00:05:26,491
Manchester City for
the Premier League title.
111
00:05:27,093 --> 00:05:30,764
- Do you have a question?
- Yeah. Am I dreaming?
112
00:05:30,775 --> 00:05:31,984
[LAUGHING]
113
00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:35,561
Uh, well, if you are,
please, don't wake up.
114
00:05:35,572 --> 00:05:37,702
And if this is the
Matrix, don't unplug me.
115
00:05:37,713 --> 00:05:39,049
[LAUGHING]
116
00:05:39,060 --> 00:05:41,229
Uh. Yeah, better Trent.
117
00:05:41,425 --> 00:05:43,872
Uh, Marcus Adebayo, The Independent.
118
00:05:43,883 --> 00:05:47,094
Uh. Jamie, on the heels
of making your England debut,
119
00:05:47,105 --> 00:05:49,441
how does it feel to be named
Premier League Player of the Month?
120
00:05:51,605 --> 00:05:56,426
Uh. Um, yeah. Uh,
yeah. It feels good, I guess.
121
00:05:56,437 --> 00:05:59,466
But it's, um... it's really
the-the team making me look good.
122
00:05:59,477 --> 00:06:02,730
So, I should be doing a better
job of making them look good, really.
123
00:06:03,973 --> 00:06:06,090
So, yeah. Makes me... Makes me feel bad.
124
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,368
[MURMURING]
125
00:06:08,961 --> 00:06:11,777
Uh, Jamie also led the
league in assists this month,
126
00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:14,541
so he's done plenty to make
his teammates look good.
127
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:16,376
Yeah, but they're the ones
who took all the shots.
128
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,878
Uh, he also scored a goal.
129
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:20,380
Uh, that was meant to be
a pass. You shouldn't count that.
130
00:06:21,708 --> 00:06:24,836
That goal is a lie. It should
be retracted from the records.
131
00:06:25,951 --> 00:06:28,537
I apolog... I apologize to
everyone, especially the kids.
132
00:06:29,179 --> 00:06:30,847
[MURMURING CONTINUES]
133
00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:33,861
Right, let's call it there, everyone.
That was great. Thanks very much.
134
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:39,775
- Hey, Boss.
- Oh, hello, Ted.
135
00:06:39,775 --> 00:06:42,944
Uh, so this morning, I
don't just bring biscuits.
136
00:06:42,944 --> 00:06:45,572
I also have a very
special surprise guest.
137
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:48,575
Oh. How exciting. To whom
do I owe the pleasure?
138
00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:50,410
I'm Coach Lasso's new bodyguard.
139
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,343
Please keep your hands
where I can see them.
140
00:06:52,354 --> 00:06:55,207
- [TED SIGHS]
- [CHUCKLES] I'm just kidding.
141
00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:57,918
You can keep them well-manicured
mitts of yours wherever you like.
142
00:06:57,918 --> 00:07:00,545
- [TED SIGHS]
- Oh, my God. You're Ted's mother.
143
00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:02,089
Winner, winner, B. F. Skinner.
144
00:07:02,089 --> 00:07:03,330
[CHUCKLES]
145
00:07:03,341 --> 00:07:06,803
Mom, this is my boss, Rebecca
Welton. Rebecca, this is Dottie Lasso.
146
00:07:06,814 --> 00:07:08,399
- [GASPS]
- Oh, honey, bring that in.
147
00:07:08,410 --> 00:07:10,389
- Oh. [LAUGHS]
- [LAUGHS]
148
00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:13,456
I can't believe I'm finally getting
to meet the woman who created
149
00:07:13,467 --> 00:07:15,303
one of the nicest humans I've ever met.
150
00:07:15,314 --> 00:07:16,546
Oh, no, don't look at me.
151
00:07:16,557 --> 00:07:17,932
This one popped out and immediately
152
00:07:17,943 --> 00:07:19,563
asked the doctor if he needed anything.
153
00:07:19,574 --> 00:07:20,721
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
154
00:07:20,732 --> 00:07:22,359
[CHUCKLES] That doesn't make any sense.
155
00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:25,059
Babies can't talk and nor do they
understand empathy. And you know...
156
00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:27,531
[STAMMERS] Dottie... I'm
sorry. May I call you Dottie?
157
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:29,074
Sure, if you want me to respond.
158
00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:31,473
Right. If you'd like, I'd
love to show you around.
159
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:34,326
Oh, I've heard great things
about the Sherlock Holmes Museum.
160
00:07:34,691 --> 00:07:35,987
I mean around the facility.
161
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:38,667
Even better. I can't
wait to meet Dani Rojas.
162
00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,393
Oh, and he does not disappoint.
163
00:07:40,404 --> 00:07:42,197
- Oh. [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES] Shall we?
164
00:07:42,208 --> 00:07:43,918
Sure. [CHUCKLES]
165
00:07:43,929 --> 00:07:45,639
- Where you from, honey?
- Surrey.
166
00:07:46,069 --> 00:07:47,696
Where are you from?
167
00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:50,529
- Surrey.
- Oh, I thought you said "sorry."
168
00:07:50,579 --> 00:07:51,663
[REBECCA CHUCKLES]
169
00:07:53,495 --> 00:07:54,552
[GROANS]
170
00:07:54,563 --> 00:07:56,648
[LAUGHING]
171
00:07:56,681 --> 00:07:57,766
So I say,
172
00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:59,737
"Officer, you must be mistaken.
173
00:07:59,748 --> 00:08:03,460
You couldn't have arrested my son.
My son is asleep in his own bed."
174
00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:04,609
[LAUGHING]
175
00:08:04,708 --> 00:08:07,116
Are you sure you do not
want a kebab, Mama Lasso?
176
00:08:07,127 --> 00:08:08,686
Oh, no, thank you, Dani.
177
00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:10,365
You are so polite.
178
00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:12,970
- [TEAM LAUGHING]
- [DOTTIE] Okay, now bear with me.
179
00:08:12,981 --> 00:08:14,191
Mmm.
180
00:08:14,752 --> 00:08:17,171
It must be so lovely having
your mother visiting, Ted.
181
00:08:17,182 --> 00:08:18,642
Oh, yeah. It's great.
182
00:08:19,184 --> 00:08:21,269
- Oklahoma.
- Oh, no. It's weird.
183
00:08:21,403 --> 00:08:23,071
Mm-mmm. Didn't even
tell me she was coming.
184
00:08:23,082 --> 00:08:25,089
Just showed up out of nowhere,
you know, like one of them
185
00:08:25,100 --> 00:08:27,978
weird eyebrow hairs I started
getting the day after I turned 40.
186
00:08:27,989 --> 00:08:30,309
Mmm. That's what mothers do, Ted.
187
00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:31,865
[LAUGHING]
188
00:08:31,876 --> 00:08:35,630
So it turns out my 12-year-old
son was not asleep in his own room.
189
00:08:35,641 --> 00:08:37,893
He had taken our car for a joyride.
190
00:08:37,904 --> 00:08:41,533
Now, he was arrested for driving
on the wrong side of the road,
191
00:08:41,544 --> 00:08:43,838
so I guess he was destined
to live in England.
192
00:08:43,849 --> 00:08:45,642
- [LAUGHING]
- [SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY IN SPANISH]
193
00:08:45,653 --> 00:08:47,128
Now, see, I wasn't 12.
194
00:08:47,139 --> 00:08:49,116
I was 15. And the whole
reason we got pulled over
195
00:08:49,127 --> 00:08:52,881
was 'cause Ronnie Fowch was throwing
gang signs at a cop car. [SIGHS]
196
00:08:52,908 --> 00:08:55,327
Look, sometimes the truth can
ruin a perfectly good story.
197
00:08:55,327 --> 00:08:57,913
- Yeah, you should work for the Daily Mail.
- [CHUCKLES]
198
00:08:58,333 --> 00:09:02,034
Ted, if you can give your
mom one lovely moment,
199
00:09:02,432 --> 00:09:05,101
you know, a memory to take
back home, then you've won.
200
00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:08,449
- [TEAM LAUGHING, CHATTERING]
- Hmm. Yeah, all right. Thanks, Boss.
201
00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:11,088
Right. I've got to go and
see a man about a horse.
202
00:09:11,099 --> 00:09:13,977
Oh. I didn't know girls said that
when they gotta pee. [CHUCKLES]
203
00:09:14,674 --> 00:09:16,854
- No, Ted, I'm buying a horse.
- Oh.
204
00:09:17,328 --> 00:09:19,330
[TEAM LAUGHING, CHATTERING]
205
00:09:20,615 --> 00:09:22,377
Hey, did Teddy ever tell you about the
206
00:09:22,388 --> 00:09:24,286
time he ate a candy bar made of poop?
207
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:27,092
- Ooh!
- Oh! Okay, okay! All right.
208
00:09:27,103 --> 00:09:29,730
I think that's enough story time
with Mama Lasso, all right, fellas?
209
00:09:29,741 --> 00:09:31,243
- [GROANS]
- Practice starts in twenty minutes.
210
00:09:31,254 --> 00:09:32,338
Up you go.
211
00:09:32,349 --> 00:09:34,393
- Nice to meet you, Mama Lasso.
- Nice to meet you.
212
00:09:34,404 --> 00:09:35,947
Hey, Mom. I'll be right back.
213
00:09:35,958 --> 00:09:38,294
I'm gonna go change, and then
I'll take you out to the pitch.
214
00:09:38,305 --> 00:09:40,140
Okay, honey. I'll be here.
215
00:09:41,102 --> 00:09:44,064
Mrs. Lasso, I just wanted to
introduce myself. I'm Trent Crimm.
216
00:09:44,064 --> 00:09:45,899
- Oh, hello, Trent.
- Hello.
217
00:09:45,899 --> 00:09:47,560
I was wondering if I could, uh,
218
00:09:47,570 --> 00:09:48,860
just have a little
chat with you about...
219
00:09:48,860 --> 00:09:50,569
Trent, your hair is fabulous.
220
00:09:50,580 --> 00:09:53,041
- It really is. It's just styling.
- [TRENT] Thank you. Thank you.
221
00:09:54,381 --> 00:09:55,758
- [GROANS]
- Van Damme.
222
00:09:55,769 --> 00:09:57,546
- Hmm?
- You still gotta wear that mask?
223
00:09:57,612 --> 00:10:01,143
Yeah, I do, man. Or else I die.
224
00:10:04,212 --> 00:10:05,747
[SPEAKS FRENCH]
225
00:10:05,974 --> 00:10:09,756
Between wearing that mask
and death, I choose death.
226
00:10:09,756 --> 00:10:12,521
- [TEAMMATES CHUCKLE]
- It does make you look very stupid.
227
00:10:12,532 --> 00:10:15,178
- Oh, well. Thank you, Jan Maas.
- [BUMBERCATCH LAUGHS]
228
00:10:15,178 --> 00:10:16,263
[SNIFFS]
229
00:10:16,263 --> 00:10:18,890
[TEAMMATES CHATTERING]
230
00:10:19,003 --> 00:10:20,505
Oh, you wanna take a crack, Jamie?
231
00:10:22,106 --> 00:10:24,584
I think it's more important
to be safe than to look cool.
232
00:10:30,471 --> 00:10:32,693
Oi! Tartt.
233
00:10:33,497 --> 00:10:35,499
Boot room. Now!
234
00:10:39,661 --> 00:10:41,997
Somebody is in trouble.
235
00:10:41,997 --> 00:10:46,168
[CLICKS TONGUE] Mmm, no.
Shouting is Roy's love language.
236
00:10:46,168 --> 00:10:47,711
[GASPS] Oh.
237
00:10:50,867 --> 00:10:51,868
[ROY GRUNTS]
238
00:10:53,849 --> 00:10:56,333
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- [ROY] All right. Listen up.
239
00:10:56,344 --> 00:10:58,252
This is not the week for your mister
240
00:10:58,262 --> 00:11:01,060
fucking humble, great teammate bullshit.
241
00:11:01,071 --> 00:11:04,519
We got City on Saturday, so we
need you to be the prickiest prick
242
00:11:04,519 --> 00:11:06,897
you've ever been in
your little prick life.
243
00:11:06,897 --> 00:11:10,984
- You understand? So I don't want you...
- [CRYING]
244
00:11:12,179 --> 00:11:16,103
- Whoa. What is wrong?
- [CRYING CONTINUES]
245
00:11:16,114 --> 00:11:19,117
I don't... I don't know. I don't
know. I don't know. I don't know.
246
00:11:19,117 --> 00:11:21,524
Are you fucking dying or some shit?
247
00:11:21,535 --> 00:11:25,039
No. No. I'm... No. I'm
just... I'm just tired.
248
00:11:25,620 --> 00:11:29,474
But I can't sleep, and I can't eat.
249
00:11:29,836 --> 00:11:32,798
And I wash me hair, but I don't
use any conditioner anymore
250
00:11:32,798 --> 00:11:34,758
'cause I... Like,
what's the fucking point?
251
00:11:35,758 --> 00:11:38,261
I feel like the guy in
the Red Bull commercial
252
00:11:38,261 --> 00:11:41,014
who's pu... who's pushing
that big rock up the hill,
253
00:11:41,014 --> 00:11:43,099
but... but he's lost his wings.
254
00:11:43,099 --> 00:11:47,437
Roy, I feel like... I feel
like I've lost me wings, Roy.
255
00:11:49,523 --> 00:11:52,609
[BREATHING SHAKILY] Where
the fuck are my wings, Roy?
256
00:11:52,609 --> 00:11:54,694
[CRYING]
257
00:12:00,283 --> 00:12:03,578
Fuck.
258
00:12:03,578 --> 00:12:06,373
[JAMIE WEEPING]
259
00:12:06,373 --> 00:12:08,166
- Will? [SIGHS]
- Yeah?
260
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:10,256
You missed a good one.
261
00:12:10,267 --> 00:12:12,853
[WEEPING CONTINUES]
262
00:12:19,268 --> 00:12:20,336
Oh, boy.
263
00:12:20,347 --> 00:12:22,889
[DOTTIE] ... that you've ever
seen. You know, I even...
264
00:12:22,889 --> 00:12:25,774
Oh, my God, Coach. Our new
striker looks just like your mom.
265
00:12:25,785 --> 00:12:26,953
That is my mom.
266
00:12:27,545 --> 00:12:29,714
I know, Ted. That was a joke.
267
00:12:29,911 --> 00:12:31,273
Oh. Right.
268
00:12:31,273 --> 00:12:32,899
Hey, Ted. Got a sec?
269
00:12:33,037 --> 00:12:34,734
What is time, Higgs boson? What's up?
270
00:12:34,734 --> 00:12:35,861
So, this morning,
271
00:12:35,861 --> 00:12:39,114
a few of my little birdies went
to visit Nathan in his new job,
272
00:12:40,407 --> 00:12:43,401
waiting tables in Tooting.
273
00:12:43,412 --> 00:12:44,574
- Tooting?
- Tooting.
274
00:12:44,585 --> 00:12:46,538
- Did he just say "Tooting"?
- Tooting.
275
00:12:46,706 --> 00:12:49,166
- Y'all got a town here called "Tooting"?
- Tooting, yes.
276
00:12:49,177 --> 00:12:51,084
- Man, this place is great, right?
- Mmm.
277
00:12:51,084 --> 00:12:53,119
Yeah. Sorry, what were
you saying about Nate?
278
00:12:53,130 --> 00:12:57,384
The little birdies are pretty
sure he'd come back if invited.
279
00:12:57,982 --> 00:13:00,240
Uh-huh. Okay. What do you think?
280
00:13:00,251 --> 00:13:02,304
Well, I do believe in
second chances, Ted.
281
00:13:02,304 --> 00:13:05,390
That's why I'm still married,
and all my sons are alive.
282
00:13:05,716 --> 00:13:06,736
Hmm.
283
00:13:06,937 --> 00:13:08,842
Hey, Roy. Would it bother
you if we brought Nate back?
284
00:13:08,853 --> 00:13:10,146
No. I don't give a fuck.
285
00:13:10,771 --> 00:13:14,275
He's great at the shit I suck at.
Look, I've gotta go and do something.
286
00:13:14,275 --> 00:13:15,943
Okay. Everything all right?
287
00:13:15,943 --> 00:13:17,511
Yeah. I've just come down with a case
288
00:13:17,521 --> 00:13:19,071
of the "none of your fucking business."
289
00:13:19,279 --> 00:13:21,782
Right, right. Okay.
What about you, Coach?
290
00:13:21,891 --> 00:13:23,868
- You all right if Nate comes...
- If you bring that Judas back,
291
00:13:23,868 --> 00:13:26,412
I will burn this place
to the fucking ground.
292
00:13:26,412 --> 00:13:27,794
[IMITATES CHOKING]
293
00:13:28,163 --> 00:13:29,540
- [TRENT] Ted?
- Mm-hmm?
294
00:13:29,540 --> 00:13:32,084
Is it true that you got onstage
and danced with Bruce Springsteen?
295
00:13:32,084 --> 00:13:33,627
No, that was Courteney Cox.
296
00:13:33,627 --> 00:13:36,380
What I did do was sing "Glory Days"
with a Bruce Springsteen cover band
297
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:38,156
at my friend Scott
Cinnamon's bar mitzvah.
298
00:13:38,167 --> 00:13:41,603
Oh, it was the bar mitzvah. That's
right. It was the bar mitzvah.
299
00:13:41,614 --> 00:13:43,199
- Is this your mom?
- Yeah.
300
00:13:43,210 --> 00:13:45,170
Oh, it is so nice to meet you.
301
00:13:45,253 --> 00:13:46,671
Oh, friends don't shake hands.
302
00:13:46,682 --> 00:13:48,851
- Friends hug. [CHUCKLES]
- Oh. [CHUCKLES]
303
00:13:49,302 --> 00:13:51,637
- Oh, weirdo Beard-o! Ah!
- Lodi Dodi! [LAUGHING]
304
00:13:51,648 --> 00:13:54,840
[LAUGHING] Come on, bring
it on in. There you go.
305
00:13:54,851 --> 00:13:57,640
- Trent, come along.
- ♪ Lodi Dodi, she like to party ♪
306
00:13:57,651 --> 00:13:59,028
- ♪ She don't cause trouble ♪
- Whoo!
307
00:13:59,028 --> 00:14:00,237
[COACH BEARD] ♪ Don't bother nobody ♪
308
00:14:00,237 --> 00:14:01,780
- [BEATBOXING]
- [LAUGHING]
309
00:14:01,780 --> 00:14:04,116
- Some of us got a football team to coach!
- [COACH BEARD] Whoo-hoo!
310
00:14:04,116 --> 00:14:06,202
[ALL] ♪ Lodi Dodi, she like to party ♪
311
00:14:06,202 --> 00:14:08,641
♪ She don't cause trouble ♪
♪ Don't bother nobody ♪
312
00:14:12,791 --> 00:14:14,543
- [APPLE CRUNCHES]
- [CHEWS]
313
00:14:18,082 --> 00:14:21,669
Oh, hello. [CHEWS] Are
you here about the pipes?
314
00:14:22,152 --> 00:14:24,853
No. What's wrong with the pipes?
315
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:26,610
Nothing.
316
00:14:27,212 --> 00:14:28,474
That's why I thought it was so weird
317
00:14:28,485 --> 00:14:29,998
that you were here about the pipes.
318
00:14:30,809 --> 00:14:33,979
Roy, what are you doing here?
319
00:14:34,072 --> 00:14:35,699
I need to talk. [SIGHS]
320
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:41,739
Roy...
321
00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:45,170
Oh, no. Not about us. I just...
322
00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:48,429
I need your help with Jamie.
323
00:14:49,284 --> 00:14:52,329
He's all fucked in the head.
And I've tried to do it myself,
324
00:14:52,340 --> 00:14:54,467
but it's all that emotional
shit you're good at.
325
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:58,060
Also... you look nice.
326
00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:00,305
You want my help with Jamie?
327
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,902
Yeah, and you look nice.
328
00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:05,994
- [APPLE CRUNCHES]
- [CHEWS]
329
00:15:07,043 --> 00:15:08,586
Um, both of you.
330
00:15:08,597 --> 00:15:10,849
Oh. [CHUCKLES] Thank you.
331
00:15:10,849 --> 00:15:13,060
That's... [CHUCKLES] This cost like...
332
00:15:13,060 --> 00:15:15,729
like two pounds from
a car boot sale, so...
333
00:15:15,862 --> 00:15:17,155
All right.
334
00:15:18,113 --> 00:15:19,739
... you know, thank you.
335
00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:21,902
[APPLE CRUNCHES]
336
00:15:24,905 --> 00:15:26,991
[PINBALL MACHINE DINGING]
337
00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:30,804
This place is very charming.
338
00:15:30,815 --> 00:15:33,611
Reminds of this Irish
bar I went to in Topeka.
339
00:15:33,622 --> 00:15:35,791
Well, you probably don't
wanna share that with me.
340
00:15:35,791 --> 00:15:38,022
The Irish part or the Topeka part?
341
00:15:38,033 --> 00:15:39,253
Both, really.
342
00:15:39,253 --> 00:15:40,462
[COACH BEARD] No! No!
343
00:15:40,462 --> 00:15:42,923
- [ELECTRONIC VOICE LAUGHING]
- [COACH BEARD GROANING]
344
00:15:42,934 --> 00:15:45,145
Oh. My turn. Excuse me. [CHUCKLES]
345
00:15:46,635 --> 00:15:47,761
[COACH BEARD SIGHS]
346
00:15:48,888 --> 00:15:51,123
Trying to follow the yellow brick road,
347
00:15:51,133 --> 00:15:54,059
where the dogs of
society keep on howling.
348
00:15:54,095 --> 00:15:55,181
How's he doing?
349
00:15:55,192 --> 00:15:58,022
[SIGHS] Well, I'm ahead, but he's
better set up for the multiball.
350
00:15:58,022 --> 00:16:01,192
[CHUCKLES] No, silly
pants. How's he doing?
351
00:16:04,177 --> 00:16:05,804
Well, he's Ted.
352
00:16:06,405 --> 00:16:07,865
Still running around in circles,
353
00:16:07,865 --> 00:16:09,800
making sure everybody's okay without
354
00:16:09,810 --> 00:16:11,994
accepting a drop of help for himself.
355
00:16:12,444 --> 00:16:14,027
Pretty much. How you doing, Dottie?
356
00:16:14,038 --> 00:16:16,248
[STAMMERS] Oh, don't you worry about me.
357
00:16:16,652 --> 00:16:18,387
Nah, y'all got enough cooking without
358
00:16:18,398 --> 00:16:20,455
putting my troubles on your to-do list.
359
00:16:21,081 --> 00:16:23,214
- Here you go.
- Ooh, thank you, Mae.
360
00:16:23,214 --> 00:16:24,298
[COACH BEARD] Cheers, Mae.
361
00:16:24,298 --> 00:16:28,510
Oh. Mae, your pub is wonderful.
362
00:16:28,510 --> 00:16:31,138
It's nothing like that
Irish place in Topeka.
363
00:16:31,138 --> 00:16:34,391
- [CHUCKLES] I'll take your word for it.
- Mm-hmm.
364
00:16:35,816 --> 00:16:38,361
So, you seeing anyone?
365
00:16:39,221 --> 00:16:41,846
Had my heart ripped out of
my chest, stomped into a pulp,
366
00:16:41,857 --> 00:16:44,401
and dragged through the town
square for everyone to ridicule.
367
00:16:44,401 --> 00:16:47,029
Oh, sweetie. That's okay,
you'll meet somebody.
368
00:16:47,029 --> 00:16:48,113
No, I'm in love.
369
00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:50,897
- Oh.
- Here. Wanna see a picture?
370
00:16:50,908 --> 00:16:52,243
- [STRAINS]
- Sure.
371
00:16:53,500 --> 00:16:55,026
Your mum's a peach.
372
00:16:55,037 --> 00:16:57,581
Oh, yeah. I... Thanks.
373
00:16:57,855 --> 00:17:01,783
Um, here, I'll... I'll swap
with you. There you are.
374
00:17:01,794 --> 00:17:05,714
You know, Ted, pinball is a lot
more fun if you use an actual ball.
375
00:17:05,714 --> 00:17:08,271
[PEOPLE CHATTERING, LAUGHING]
376
00:17:08,282 --> 00:17:10,170
Yeah. Well, I... you know, I was
377
00:17:10,181 --> 00:17:12,703
letting Coach and my
mom catch up a little.
378
00:17:12,714 --> 00:17:15,049
- That's all.
- [MAE] Mmm.
379
00:17:15,531 --> 00:17:16,741
[CHUCKLES]
380
00:17:18,657 --> 00:17:21,243
"They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
381
00:17:21,296 --> 00:17:24,029
They may not mean to,
but they do." [CHUCKLES]
382
00:17:25,168 --> 00:17:27,888
"They fill you with the faults they had
383
00:17:27,899 --> 00:17:30,442
and add some extra just for you."
384
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,428
[CHUCKLES] "But they were
fucked up in their turn
385
00:17:34,885 --> 00:17:38,096
by fools in old-style hats and coats,
386
00:17:39,790 --> 00:17:44,128
who half the time were soppy-stern
and half at one another's throats.
387
00:17:46,419 --> 00:17:49,337
Man hands on misery to man.
388
00:17:49,724 --> 00:17:52,434
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
389
00:17:54,059 --> 00:17:58,230
Get out as early as you can and
don't have any kids yourself."
390
00:17:58,556 --> 00:17:59,641
[CHUCKLES]
391
00:18:05,774 --> 00:18:08,152
- [WHIRRING]
- [DISTORTED LAUGHTER, CHATTERING]
392
00:18:08,152 --> 00:18:11,322
Hey, Ted. Your mum's the bollocks.
393
00:18:11,322 --> 00:18:12,990
We just became friends on Facebook.
394
00:18:12,990 --> 00:18:14,950
I didn't know you were almost
the drummer in Coldplay.
395
00:18:14,950 --> 00:18:16,368
Oh, yeah. It's true. It's true.
396
00:18:16,368 --> 00:18:18,162
- It's amazing. It's incredible!
- [LAUGHS]
397
00:18:18,162 --> 00:18:20,414
[ALL CHATTERING, LAUGHING]
398
00:18:20,414 --> 00:18:21,498
[BAZ] No way.
399
00:18:21,498 --> 00:18:23,584
[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]
400
00:18:25,002 --> 00:18:26,361
[PINBALL MACHINE DINGING]
401
00:18:28,668 --> 00:18:30,628
I can't take your bed, Teddy.
402
00:18:30,639 --> 00:18:33,416
Mom, it's okay, all right?
I'll just sleep on the couch.
403
00:18:33,427 --> 00:18:35,015
No, I'll sleep on the couch.
404
00:18:35,025 --> 00:18:37,104
Well, then I'm gonna sleep
on the floor next to the couch, and
405
00:18:37,114 --> 00:18:38,807
neither of us are gonna use the bed.
406
00:18:38,807 --> 00:18:39,850
Please.
407
00:18:40,281 --> 00:18:42,575
- Thank you.
- Okay.
408
00:18:42,728 --> 00:18:44,063
- [GRUNTS]
- Not on the bed.
409
00:18:44,063 --> 00:18:45,986
Okay. [STRAINS] Okay. Okay.
410
00:18:45,997 --> 00:18:48,137
- [GROANS]
- Hey, I brought you something.
411
00:18:48,148 --> 00:18:50,232
What? On the off chance
we'd bump into each other?
412
00:18:50,243 --> 00:18:53,125
No, it's your clippings from back home.
413
00:18:57,258 --> 00:18:58,259
Oh.
414
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:00,655
I thought you'd want those.
415
00:19:01,449 --> 00:19:03,682
[CHUCKLES] I appreciate it.
416
00:19:05,197 --> 00:19:07,200
[SIGHS] So, what's your plan tomorrow?
417
00:19:07,211 --> 00:19:09,713
Hmm? Yeah, do you wanna
come to Manchester with us?
418
00:19:09,713 --> 00:19:11,257
[SIGHS] I don't know.
419
00:19:11,257 --> 00:19:13,759
I mean, coming all the way to
England and not seeing a soccer match
420
00:19:13,759 --> 00:19:16,095
is kind of like going to
Rome and not going to church
421
00:19:16,095 --> 00:19:17,263
or getting your pocket picked.
422
00:19:17,263 --> 00:19:20,634
Oh. Well, thank you, but I
think I'll just stay here.
423
00:19:20,645 --> 00:19:23,686
I didn't get much sleep last week,
what with all that noisy sex from...
424
00:19:23,686 --> 00:19:25,229
- not me... the Australians.
- The Australians.
425
00:19:25,229 --> 00:19:26,897
- Yes, no, I remember.
- Yeah. Exactly.
426
00:19:26,897 --> 00:19:29,567
And you know how nervous I get
when I'm watching your games.
427
00:19:29,567 --> 00:19:31,402
So I think I'll just stay put
428
00:19:31,402 --> 00:19:34,113
and let you go beat the pants
off those Manchesterians.
429
00:19:34,113 --> 00:19:35,154
Mancunians.
430
00:19:35,165 --> 00:19:36,540
And then I'll have a home-cooked meal
431
00:19:36,551 --> 00:19:38,325
waiting for you when you get back.
432
00:19:38,325 --> 00:19:39,493
It's been too long.
433
00:19:39,870 --> 00:19:43,606
Yeah. No, that'll be nice. Okay. Um...
434
00:19:45,194 --> 00:19:46,737
Well, then I'll see you in the morning.
435
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:49,159
Hey, um...
436
00:19:49,995 --> 00:19:54,494
[SIGHS] Are you still
having those, um, episodes?
437
00:19:55,274 --> 00:19:58,450
- [STAMMERS] You know.
- Oh, the panic attacks.
438
00:19:58,656 --> 00:19:59,784
Yeah.
439
00:19:59,795 --> 00:20:03,674
Um. No, no. Uh, not recently.
440
00:20:04,859 --> 00:20:07,719
You know, I've actually been,
uh, talking to this therapist.
441
00:20:07,730 --> 00:20:10,466
Ooh, let me guess. It's
all my fault. [CHUCKLES]
442
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:14,481
No, Mom. No, of course not.
No, but uh... [CLEARS THROAT]
443
00:20:14,492 --> 00:20:16,494
Well, I mean, it's...
uh, it's really helped.
444
00:20:16,505 --> 00:20:18,372
Oh, good, good, good, good, good, good.
445
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:21,386
Yeah. You, uh... You ever
thought about talking to someone?
446
00:20:21,397 --> 00:20:25,609
Oh, no. That is not my cup of
tea. And you know I love my tea.
447
00:20:26,241 --> 00:20:28,910
[CHUCKLES] Good night, Mom.
448
00:20:29,017 --> 00:20:32,437
Good night, sweetie. Oh,
and thank you for the bed.
449
00:20:33,047 --> 00:20:34,264
You're welcome.
450
00:20:37,676 --> 00:20:39,678
[CROWD CHEERING]
451
00:20:49,138 --> 00:20:51,814
Hey, hot dog. Y'all joining us today?
452
00:20:51,825 --> 00:20:53,862
- Well, we're all in this together, Ted.
- Yeah.
453
00:20:53,873 --> 00:20:56,309
I also received a strongly
worded text from Nora
454
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,401
demanding I stop using my private jet.
455
00:20:58,412 --> 00:20:59,415
Why?
456
00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:01,679
- The environment.
- Oh, yeah.
457
00:21:01,910 --> 00:21:03,912
- Goddamn environment.
- Yeah.
458
00:21:04,038 --> 00:21:05,331
Yep.
459
00:21:05,432 --> 00:21:06,517
All right.
460
00:21:06,997 --> 00:21:09,250
[CHATTERING]
461
00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:13,401
Hi.
462
00:21:14,019 --> 00:21:15,782
- Hey.
- How's he doing?
463
00:21:16,674 --> 00:21:17,841
[SHUTTER CLICKS]
464
00:21:23,472 --> 00:21:25,099
Fucking hell.
465
00:21:25,099 --> 00:21:26,515
I'll talk to him.
466
00:21:27,776 --> 00:21:29,265
- [SIGHS]
- Right.
467
00:21:29,658 --> 00:21:34,788
Ladies and gentlemen.
Let our journey commence.
468
00:21:34,799 --> 00:21:37,218
[ALL CHEERING]
469
00:21:37,567 --> 00:21:39,780
Look at Ken. Boy, he
cleans up nice, don't he?
470
00:21:39,780 --> 00:21:41,699
- You should see him in drag.
- Really?
471
00:21:45,170 --> 00:21:47,025
There you go. Well, um, take your time.
472
00:21:47,036 --> 00:21:48,751
And while you wait,
do snack on some nuts.
473
00:21:48,762 --> 00:21:50,332
And I'll... I'll be
back with your drinks.
474
00:21:50,332 --> 00:21:51,333
- All right?
- Thank you.
475
00:21:51,333 --> 00:21:54,795
Hey, hey. [STAMMERS] Oi, oi, oi.
[CHUCKLES] Do you know who this is?
476
00:21:55,071 --> 00:21:56,255
Your son?
477
00:21:56,501 --> 00:21:58,173
What? No. [SCOFFS]
478
00:21:58,394 --> 00:21:59,675
Our waiter?
479
00:21:59,675 --> 00:22:01,377
Bloody hell, you two are a right pair.
480
00:22:01,387 --> 00:22:03,762
No, I mean do you know who he was?
481
00:22:03,898 --> 00:22:05,608
- I don't know.
- [SOFTLY] Uh...
482
00:22:05,619 --> 00:22:08,416
Only the manager of West
Ham United. [CHUCKLES]
483
00:22:08,427 --> 00:22:11,054
Oh, right. You're the Wonder Kid.
484
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:13,080
Yes, that's it. I said Wonder Kid.
485
00:22:13,203 --> 00:22:17,223
This man right here went from
kit man to assistant coach,
486
00:22:17,409 --> 00:22:21,614
to manager, to top of the league,
and now he's my head waiter.
487
00:22:21,793 --> 00:22:24,003
I'm... [STAMMERS] I'm so sorry.
488
00:22:24,506 --> 00:22:26,274
Anyway, nice talking to you.
489
00:22:26,285 --> 00:22:27,870
[CLEARS THROAT] Please try the fish.
490
00:22:27,870 --> 00:22:29,705
We've got a ton of it
out back. [CHUCKLING]
491
00:22:29,705 --> 00:22:32,416
- All right. Fish, fish, fish, fish, fish.
- [CHUCKLES] Yep, yep.
492
00:22:32,718 --> 00:22:35,753
Was it drugs? I done drugs. I get it.
493
00:22:35,753 --> 00:22:38,765
No, no. No, I just...
I just like working here.
494
00:22:39,309 --> 00:22:41,293
And that's my girlfriend. [MUTTERS]
495
00:22:42,551 --> 00:22:44,686
Um. Anyway, um, enjoy the nuts.
496
00:22:44,696 --> 00:22:46,651
I'll, uh... I'll go and
get your drinks, okay?
497
00:22:47,799 --> 00:22:49,021
Definitely drugs.
498
00:22:49,032 --> 00:22:50,284
Oh, yeah. Definitely.
499
00:22:51,225 --> 00:22:52,392
But which ones?
500
00:23:08,846 --> 00:23:10,098
[KNOCKING]
501
00:23:13,844 --> 00:23:14,970
Hi.
502
00:23:15,064 --> 00:23:16,190
Hey.
503
00:23:17,100 --> 00:23:19,577
- Can I come in?
- Y-Yeah, yeah. Sure.
504
00:23:19,588 --> 00:23:21,924
Come in. Yeah, yeah. Ok...
Yeah, what's up, yeah?
505
00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:26,268
I just wanted to come
and see how you're doing.
506
00:23:27,462 --> 00:23:28,475
Roy told you.
507
00:23:28,999 --> 00:23:32,564
Well, he's worried
about you. Is that okay?
508
00:23:33,060 --> 00:23:34,770
Yeah. Yeah, it's fine.
509
00:23:34,937 --> 00:23:37,606
I'm fine. I'm... I'm
good. I'm... I'm great.
510
00:23:37,606 --> 00:23:41,235
In fact, I think I'm the
best that I've ever been.
511
00:23:41,912 --> 00:23:43,184
- You know?
- [CHUCKLES]
512
00:23:43,195 --> 00:23:47,908
[BREATHING HEAVILY] There's
something so sad about a suitcase.
513
00:23:47,908 --> 00:23:49,851
Do you know what I mean? It's like...
514
00:23:51,688 --> 00:23:54,858
It's like a drawer without a home.
515
00:23:56,364 --> 00:23:58,074
[GROANS]
516
00:23:58,085 --> 00:24:01,557
- Hey, Jamie. Look at me.
- [BREATHING HEAVILY]
517
00:24:01,568 --> 00:24:05,072
- You've got a lot going on right now.
- Mm-hmm. There's a lot going on, yeah.
518
00:24:05,083 --> 00:24:07,761
This is the first time you've
played back home since you left.
519
00:24:07,834 --> 00:24:10,420
- [EXHALES HEAVILY] Ooh.
- The crowd's gonna hate you.
520
00:24:10,533 --> 00:24:12,055
And the person who's gonna be booing
521
00:24:12,065 --> 00:24:13,893
the loudest in the crowd is your dad.
522
00:24:13,893 --> 00:24:15,519
I didn't think of that. Yeah.
523
00:24:15,519 --> 00:24:18,022
And I know a lot of people are
shit-talking your hair online.
524
00:24:18,022 --> 00:24:20,941
- They're what?
- [STAMMERS] No! Think about it.
525
00:24:20,941 --> 00:24:22,610
If you guys win tomorrow,
526
00:24:22,610 --> 00:24:26,697
then you will be on the
precipice of achieving everything
527
00:24:26,697 --> 00:24:28,436
that you've ever dreamed of.
528
00:24:29,553 --> 00:24:30,815
- Oh, my God.
- Whoa, shit!
529
00:24:30,826 --> 00:24:32,984
- [THUDS]
- Sorry, Jamie. Ooh!
530
00:24:36,968 --> 00:24:38,970
[CLICKS, BEEPING]
531
00:24:51,450 --> 00:24:54,244
- [KEELEY WHISPERS] Here.
- [WHISPERS] Oh, cheers.
532
00:24:55,351 --> 00:24:56,936
[SNIFFS] How'd it go with Jamie?
533
00:24:57,222 --> 00:24:59,180
Yeah, I fucked it. I made it worse.
534
00:24:59,191 --> 00:25:01,819
Ah, shit.
535
00:25:03,561 --> 00:25:04,881
Hello, Roy and Keeley.
536
00:25:04,892 --> 00:25:08,306
Good to see you both next
to each other like before.
537
00:25:08,317 --> 00:25:11,528
[WHISPERS] No. We're just
sitting together as friends.
538
00:25:11,596 --> 00:25:14,557
- Yeah, and she just looks very nice.
- [PLAYERS SHUSHING]
539
00:25:15,103 --> 00:25:16,730
Nora Ephron.
540
00:25:16,905 --> 00:25:19,101
- I'm saying my apology.
- Who?
541
00:25:19,112 --> 00:25:20,649
Carl Bernstein's ex.
542
00:25:27,733 --> 00:25:31,737
[CRIES, SIGHS]
543
00:25:38,674 --> 00:25:43,679
- [ACTOR] Don't cry, Shop Girl. Don't cry.
- [SNIFFLES]
544
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:47,278
[CRIES]
545
00:25:47,278 --> 00:25:49,166
I wanted it to be you.
546
00:25:49,372 --> 00:25:50,373
[GRUNTS]
547
00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:54,206
[ACTOR 2, THROUGH SCREEN] I wanted
it to be you so badly. [SNIFFLES]
548
00:25:56,246 --> 00:25:57,750
[DOG BARKING ON-SCREEN]
549
00:26:00,871 --> 00:26:02,664
[CRYING]
550
00:26:19,556 --> 00:26:22,135
I mean, Sleepless in Seattle
is still a far superior film.
551
00:26:22,146 --> 00:26:23,847
- Not now.
- I'm just saying.
552
00:26:29,657 --> 00:26:30,658
[TED] Whoo!
553
00:26:33,093 --> 00:26:35,857
All right. Listen up, you big softies.
554
00:26:35,868 --> 00:26:38,662
10:00 p.m., lights out. Then
get yourselves some beauty sleep
555
00:26:38,662 --> 00:26:40,486
for tomorrow's big
meet-cute with Man City,
556
00:26:40,497 --> 00:26:41,498
- you hear?
- Whoo!
557
00:26:41,498 --> 00:26:43,167
All right, Ephron on
three. One, two, three!
558
00:26:43,167 --> 00:26:44,710
- [ALL] Ephron!
- [TED] There you go.
559
00:26:44,710 --> 00:26:47,046
- [PLAYER 1] Ah, that was Dave Chappelle.
- Yeah.
560
00:26:47,046 --> 00:26:48,964
[TED] Not bad, yeah? Hey,
y'all seen that before?
561
00:26:48,964 --> 00:26:51,008
- [TED] First time? First time, yeah?
- [PLAYER 2] First time.
562
00:26:51,008 --> 00:26:52,323
[TED] It's a goody. It was a goody.
563
00:26:52,334 --> 00:26:55,168
You gotta see Sleepless in Seattle,
though. You know, this is why...
564
00:26:55,179 --> 00:26:57,640
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
565
00:27:08,392 --> 00:27:09,393
Oh!
566
00:28:15,384 --> 00:28:16,552
The fuck is he?
567
00:28:16,552 --> 00:28:18,282
I don't know. You've lost him.
568
00:28:18,335 --> 00:28:21,227
- You said he went down here.
- I did not. You said that.
569
00:28:21,620 --> 00:28:23,339
[ROY] No. I said he's in a tunnel,
570
00:28:23,350 --> 00:28:26,270
- I didn't say he was in this tunnel.
- Well, there's no other tunnel, is there?
571
00:28:26,629 --> 00:28:28,882
I don't believe it.
You've lost Jamie Tartt.
572
00:28:28,893 --> 00:28:31,056
- You can't lose Jamie Tartt.
- Well, you have.
573
00:28:31,067 --> 00:28:32,069
- [JAMIE] Oi!
- [KEELEY SCREAMS]
574
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,408
- Fucking hell!
- Why are you following me?
575
00:28:34,419 --> 00:28:36,504
Just wanted to make sure
you're okay, you prick.
576
00:28:37,342 --> 00:28:40,012
What's going on, Jamie?
Are you buying drugs?
577
00:28:41,996 --> 00:28:42,997
[SIGHS]
578
00:28:43,777 --> 00:28:44,861
Come on.
579
00:28:49,793 --> 00:28:52,796
- [GROANS]
- [CHILDREN CHATTERING]
580
00:28:54,089 --> 00:28:55,174
[GROANING]
581
00:28:55,174 --> 00:28:57,426
- Are you joking? Oi!
- [CHILD] How'd you miss?
582
00:28:59,156 --> 00:29:01,575
- Are you Jamie Tartt?
- Yeah.
583
00:29:02,235 --> 00:29:03,511
More like Jamie Fart.
584
00:29:03,522 --> 00:29:06,143
- Screw you, dickhead! Prick!
- [CHILD 2] Yeah, who are you?
585
00:29:06,143 --> 00:29:07,853
City's gonna fuck you up tomorrow.
586
00:29:07,853 --> 00:29:09,688
[CHILD 2] Yeah, you
spaz. You little twat!
587
00:29:09,688 --> 00:29:11,899
- Yeah, it's not for you, pussy!
- Yeah, go on!
588
00:29:11,899 --> 00:29:13,901
- [CHILD 3] Walk. Bye!
- [CHILD 2] Bye.
589
00:29:13,901 --> 00:29:15,319
[CHILD 1] I smell your bum from here.
590
00:29:15,319 --> 00:29:16,570
- [CHILD 2 SHUSHES]
- [WHIMPERS]
591
00:29:19,805 --> 00:29:20,973
Good lads.
592
00:29:20,986 --> 00:29:22,654
- Oh, my gosh!
- Oh! [SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
593
00:29:22,665 --> 00:29:24,782
- Oh! Come on!
- That was sick!
594
00:29:24,793 --> 00:29:27,129
- Yes, yes! [SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
- Yeah! Come on!
595
00:29:27,831 --> 00:29:29,041
[DOORBELL RINGS]
596
00:29:29,041 --> 00:29:31,126
[CHILDREN CONTINUE CHATTERING]
597
00:29:31,814 --> 00:29:34,869
Hey! Jamie!
598
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:36,131
How you doing, Simon?
599
00:29:36,131 --> 00:29:39,031
- Uh, this is Keeley, that's Roy.
- Come on in, come on in.
600
00:29:39,042 --> 00:29:41,503
- How are you, mate? Good seeing you, man.
- Yeah, great.
601
00:29:41,514 --> 00:29:42,627
- Hi! [CHUCKLES]
- [SIMON] Hello.
602
00:29:42,638 --> 00:29:43,889
[CHUCKLES] Oh, hello.
603
00:29:44,569 --> 00:29:45,570
Uh...
604
00:29:45,650 --> 00:29:47,694
Georgie, we've got visitors.
605
00:29:48,168 --> 00:29:50,378
[GEORGIE] What was that,
love? Someone at the door?
606
00:29:54,106 --> 00:29:55,223
[JAMIE] Hello, Mommy.
607
00:29:55,234 --> 00:29:59,280
- [CHUCKLES]
- [SCREAMS] Jamie! Oh!
608
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:03,066
Mommy, I'd like to introduce you to
Keeley, and this hairy prick's Roy.
609
00:30:03,077 --> 00:30:04,618
- Hi.
- Hey, you.
610
00:30:04,721 --> 00:30:07,371
Hi! Oh, it's lovely to
finally meet you both.
611
00:30:07,371 --> 00:30:09,832
I'd come and give you a hug, but
I'm not letting go of this one.
612
00:30:09,832 --> 00:30:11,584
[GEORGIE SQUEALS]
613
00:30:11,584 --> 00:30:13,711
Oh, there they go. [INHALES SHARPLY]
614
00:30:13,711 --> 00:30:15,964
Right, who wants some sweet treats?
615
00:30:15,975 --> 00:30:18,496
Look at your gorgeous face. I love it.
616
00:30:18,507 --> 00:30:21,093
- Oh! How have you been? Look at you.
- [JAMIE] Oh, Mom. You look...
617
00:30:21,093 --> 00:30:22,761
[GEORGIE] Oi. [LAUGHS]
618
00:30:23,415 --> 00:30:26,819
[JAMIE] It was just poopy. [STAMMERS]
You know, it really upset me.
619
00:30:27,477 --> 00:30:30,758
This guy on Twitter, he kept
saying that it was blonde,
620
00:30:30,769 --> 00:30:34,070
but I'm like, "It's
fucking walnut mist, mate."
621
00:30:34,081 --> 00:30:35,916
- Yeah, obviously.
- Yeah.
622
00:30:35,927 --> 00:30:38,263
He's done a lovely
job. It's dead natural.
623
00:30:38,427 --> 00:30:40,512
[LIQUID POURS]
624
00:30:41,626 --> 00:30:43,962
- What do you think?
- Mmm, it's really yummy.
625
00:30:45,034 --> 00:30:46,619
- Hey.
- Uh, it's fucking...
626
00:30:46,619 --> 00:30:47,953
- [STAMMERS] ... delicious.
- Mmm.
627
00:30:47,953 --> 00:30:50,497
Oh. Well, it's a Paul Hollywood recipe,
628
00:30:50,497 --> 00:30:52,623
but I've gone a little
bit rogue on it. [CHUCKLES]
629
00:30:52,634 --> 00:30:53,667
- Mmm.
- Right.
630
00:30:53,667 --> 00:30:56,921
Babes, do you wanna give Roy
and Keeley the grand tour?
631
00:30:56,921 --> 00:30:58,881
[CHUCKLES] You know,
show them around a bit.
632
00:30:58,881 --> 00:31:02,676
- Yes! Good idea. Thank... Oops! [CHUCKLES]
- [KEELEY CHUCKLES]
633
00:31:02,676 --> 00:31:04,345
Right, follow me. We
will start in the kitchen,
634
00:31:04,345 --> 00:31:06,639
- aka my laboratory. [CHUCKLES]
- [KEELEY] Ooh.
635
00:31:06,639 --> 00:31:09,642
[SIMON] I've just got a new, uh,
bain-marie, and it's copperplated.
636
00:31:10,172 --> 00:31:12,733
[KEELEY] Wow. What does that
mean? It sounds expensive.
637
00:31:13,145 --> 00:31:14,146
[GEORGIE] Hmm.
638
00:31:17,441 --> 00:31:20,611
Have you ever considered doing a
happy hour at the Taste of Athens?
639
00:31:21,324 --> 00:31:23,092
I've literally never thought about work
640
00:31:23,103 --> 00:31:24,823
the second after leaving work. [SIGHS]
641
00:31:24,823 --> 00:31:26,450
Or even while there, really.
642
00:31:26,798 --> 00:31:29,013
Hmm. [NATHAN BREATHES HEAVILY]
643
00:31:32,949 --> 00:31:34,701
I don't think you should
work there anymore.
644
00:31:35,610 --> 00:31:37,730
Why? I'm a great waiter.
645
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:41,396
Yes. It's weird how
great of a waiter you are.
646
00:31:44,326 --> 00:31:47,685
But you're a coach. They
want you back at Richmond.
647
00:31:48,498 --> 00:31:49,624
You should go.
648
00:31:50,427 --> 00:31:52,628
[INHALES DEEPLY]
649
00:31:52,802 --> 00:31:55,778
Thing is, it didn't really
end too well for me there.
650
00:31:55,952 --> 00:31:58,712
I think a lot of that was
my fault. Well, it was...
651
00:31:58,832 --> 00:32:00,346
it was all my fault. [SCOFFS]
652
00:32:02,229 --> 00:32:04,405
Look, after this season, I'll
try and get another coaching job,
653
00:32:04,405 --> 00:32:06,615
just... just not at Richmond, okay?
654
00:32:07,825 --> 00:32:11,745
I w... I promi... I will.
I promise. I just... Yeah.
655
00:32:13,193 --> 00:32:14,361
Mm-hmm.
656
00:32:16,214 --> 00:32:19,107
Yeah? You hungry? Do you want food?
657
00:32:19,903 --> 00:32:23,907
Oh, dunno. Can I have some
nuts while I think about it?
658
00:32:25,155 --> 00:32:27,063
Right. Where are... Where are they?
659
00:32:27,893 --> 00:32:30,397
Here's the genius behind the nuts, okay?
660
00:32:31,116 --> 00:32:33,910
They make people thirsty. Yeah?
661
00:32:34,010 --> 00:32:39,333
I'm giving away, what, five p on
nuts and taking in five quid on beer.
662
00:32:39,536 --> 00:32:41,796
That's smart. Right?
663
00:32:42,383 --> 00:32:44,955
Why am I the only person
thinking about this stuff?
664
00:32:46,667 --> 00:32:48,211
You doing all right?
665
00:32:49,337 --> 00:32:51,673
Yeah. Yeah, everything's fine.
666
00:32:55,075 --> 00:32:56,076
Okay.
667
00:32:57,621 --> 00:33:01,333
[CHUCKLES] Come on. Out with it.
668
00:33:07,486 --> 00:33:08,487
You heard from Dad?
669
00:33:09,506 --> 00:33:10,591
No.
670
00:33:11,331 --> 00:33:13,666
Haven't heard from that
human ball sack in ages.
671
00:33:13,706 --> 00:33:15,125
[CHUCKLES]
672
00:33:15,682 --> 00:33:17,101
You?
673
00:33:17,435 --> 00:33:19,437
[SWALLOWS] No, not since Wembley.
674
00:33:23,955 --> 00:33:26,833
Thought I was finally rid of him, but...
675
00:33:28,572 --> 00:33:29,615
[SIGHS]
676
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:33,617
... I always did what I did...
677
00:33:36,542 --> 00:33:38,840
because fuck him, you know?
678
00:33:38,851 --> 00:33:42,229
And... And now that I don't give
a shit about him, it's like...
679
00:33:48,874 --> 00:33:52,085
Y-You know when some guys can't
make their willies go hard?
680
00:33:53,247 --> 00:33:54,754
Oh, you mean impotent?
681
00:33:55,065 --> 00:33:57,067
Yeah. It's like I got that, but...
682
00:33:59,919 --> 00:34:01,545
but it's like I got it in...
683
00:34:04,355 --> 00:34:05,898
It's like I got it in my soul.
684
00:34:12,710 --> 00:34:17,777
And here is the main
attraction. Jamie's room.
685
00:34:17,788 --> 00:34:19,498
Oh! [GASPS]
686
00:34:24,599 --> 00:34:25,683
Whoa.
687
00:34:27,275 --> 00:34:30,195
- Fucking hell.
- Ah, yes.
688
00:34:30,248 --> 00:34:32,750
Many posters have come
and gone over the years.
689
00:34:32,761 --> 00:34:35,223
Henry, Gerrard, Ronaldo.
690
00:34:36,141 --> 00:34:38,477
But Roy Kent always remains.
691
00:34:38,787 --> 00:34:40,049
- Huh.
- [CELL PHONE ALARM RINGS]
692
00:34:40,060 --> 00:34:42,313
Oh! Meat pies are done. Excuse me.
693
00:34:44,128 --> 00:34:45,712
Whoa.
694
00:34:46,275 --> 00:34:47,942
Fucking hell.
695
00:34:50,160 --> 00:34:51,161
Jamie...
696
00:34:54,395 --> 00:34:58,733
your father, he is who he is.
697
00:35:00,877 --> 00:35:04,422
And he is never, ever,
ever gonna change.
698
00:35:06,688 --> 00:35:07,815
And like it or not,
699
00:35:08,261 --> 00:35:11,514
you've ended up being who you are
so that you can prove him wrong.
700
00:35:15,246 --> 00:35:17,031
And you are amazing.
701
00:35:20,164 --> 00:35:21,540
You are.
702
00:35:26,517 --> 00:35:29,015
[CRYING] When you come on for England...
703
00:35:29,026 --> 00:35:31,172
[CHUCKLES]
704
00:35:31,183 --> 00:35:35,980
Oh. Jesus, Jamie, I
wept. [INHALES SHARPLY]
705
00:35:36,832 --> 00:35:39,834
- I bawled me fucking eyes out. [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES]
706
00:35:44,917 --> 00:35:49,463
And, yeah, your dad will
be in the stands tomorrow,
707
00:35:49,463 --> 00:35:51,840
pissed out of his head,
rooting against you.
708
00:35:54,583 --> 00:35:55,834
And it won't matter.
709
00:36:00,285 --> 00:36:02,871
You don't have anything
to prove to that toerag.
710
00:36:08,752 --> 00:36:10,137
[KISSES, SNIFFS]
711
00:36:11,485 --> 00:36:15,700
You're not lost, my sexy little baby.
712
00:36:15,711 --> 00:36:17,170
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
713
00:36:19,410 --> 00:36:23,956
You're just not sure which
direction you're going in... yet.
714
00:36:29,169 --> 00:36:31,547
[SNIFFLES, KISSES]
715
00:36:32,172 --> 00:36:33,298
Mmm.
716
00:36:37,261 --> 00:36:40,764
[SIGHS] This is fucking weird.
717
00:36:42,307 --> 00:36:45,477
There's a lot of weird to choose
from. Can you be more specific?
718
00:36:48,783 --> 00:36:49,784
You and me...
719
00:36:52,225 --> 00:36:54,644
sitting on Jamie
Tartt's childhood bed...
720
00:36:56,864 --> 00:37:00,492
being all fucking concerned
about him and shit.
721
00:37:03,412 --> 00:37:07,916
Yeah. Good on us, Roy-o.
722
00:37:09,179 --> 00:37:10,347
Thanks, bud.
723
00:37:10,794 --> 00:37:12,937
You're welcome, pal. [CHUCKLES]
724
00:37:16,284 --> 00:37:17,973
I don't wanna be friends.
725
00:37:19,622 --> 00:37:22,458
- You don't?
- Uh-uh.
726
00:37:23,729 --> 00:37:27,108
I don't wanna be just friends.
727
00:37:37,410 --> 00:37:38,653
- Roy...
- [DOOR OPENS]
728
00:37:38,664 --> 00:37:40,910
Well, guys, I think we
should probably get...
729
00:37:41,867 --> 00:37:46,022
- Uh, you good to go?
- Yeah.
730
00:37:46,770 --> 00:37:47,771
Yeah.
731
00:37:48,591 --> 00:37:50,959
Right. [GRUNTS]
732
00:37:52,591 --> 00:37:53,592
[GROANS]
733
00:37:59,588 --> 00:38:00,591
[DOOR CLOSES]
734
00:38:00,602 --> 00:38:01,970
- [JAMIE] I love you.
- [GEORGIE] I love you.
735
00:38:01,970 --> 00:38:04,014
- [JAMIE] Good to see you.
- [GEORGIE] Good to see you too.
736
00:38:04,014 --> 00:38:05,766
[GROANS] Right.
737
00:38:05,766 --> 00:38:07,226
Hey, listen to me.
738
00:38:07,226 --> 00:38:10,020
I don't care if you lose
by ten goals tomorrow.
739
00:38:10,020 --> 00:38:12,648
I just want you to be happy. Okay, Son?
740
00:38:13,607 --> 00:38:17,046
Okay. Love you, Mommy. [KISSES]
741
00:38:17,057 --> 00:38:18,112
I love you.
742
00:38:18,112 --> 00:38:20,447
[JAMIE] Mmm. See you soon.
743
00:38:20,447 --> 00:38:21,990
See you soon. All right, come on.
744
00:38:21,990 --> 00:38:24,118
- Off you go. Go home.
- All right. Bye.
745
00:38:24,910 --> 00:38:26,328
It was great to meet you.
746
00:38:26,912 --> 00:38:28,038
Bye.
747
00:38:28,038 --> 00:38:30,791
- One for the road.
- [KEELEY] Ooh. This way, babe.
748
00:38:30,791 --> 00:38:32,876
See you later. [KISSES]
Love... Love you.
749
00:38:39,007 --> 00:38:42,010
[ROY] We should go and
have cocktails. [CHUCKLES]
750
00:38:50,895 --> 00:38:55,065
... the latest in workout
technology like yoga mats!
751
00:38:55,065 --> 00:38:57,467
- [CELL PHONE CHIMES]
- [KEELEY] Manchester has much to offer
752
00:38:57,477 --> 00:38:58,944
when it comes to arts and culture,
753
00:38:58,944 --> 00:39:02,114
including the Greater
Manchester Police Museum!
754
00:39:02,901 --> 00:39:06,702
The rainy city is also known as
well for science and technology,
755
00:39:06,702 --> 00:39:10,289
for it was right here in 1917
756
00:39:10,289 --> 00:39:14,084
that Ernest Rutherford
first split the atom.
757
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:19,048
And you'll split your sides laughing
at Manchester's many comedy clubs
758
00:39:19,048 --> 00:39:22,259
and improvised murder mystery
dinner theaters. And, of course...
759
00:39:22,259 --> 00:39:23,343
[SIGHS]
760
00:39:23,343 --> 00:39:25,005
[KEELEY] ... your trip wouldn't be
761
00:39:25,016 --> 00:39:27,056
complete without
heading to Etihad Stadium,
762
00:39:27,056 --> 00:39:31,477
- home of the Manchester... [VOICE FADES]
- [FANS SINGING] ♪ Blue moon ♪
763
00:39:31,477 --> 00:39:37,983
♪ You saw me standing alone ♪
764
00:39:37,983 --> 00:39:44,782
♪ Without a dream in my heart ♪
765
00:39:45,096 --> 00:39:50,829
♪ Without a love of my own ♪
766
00:39:50,829 --> 00:39:53,165
[CHEERING]
767
00:39:53,165 --> 00:39:58,587
♪ I said, blue moon ♪
♪ You saw me standing alone ♪
768
00:39:58,587 --> 00:40:03,092
♪ Without a dream in my heart ♪
♪ Without a love of my own... ♪
769
00:40:03,092 --> 00:40:06,531
Richmond should have a classic
old song for our fans to sing.
770
00:40:06,542 --> 00:40:07,888
- Hmm.
- Oh, we did.
771
00:40:07,888 --> 00:40:11,199
Uh, when Freddie Mercury
briefly owned the team in 1980,
772
00:40:11,210 --> 00:40:13,837
he tried to make "Fat Bottomed
Girls" the team anthem.
773
00:40:13,837 --> 00:40:15,486
- [CHUCKLES]
- Didn't work out.
774
00:40:15,497 --> 00:40:17,258
Did a bunch of people get offended?
775
00:40:17,258 --> 00:40:19,760
Just the flat-bottomed girls really.
776
00:40:19,760 --> 00:40:21,011
- Yeah.
- Hmm.
777
00:40:21,011 --> 00:40:23,347
My father went to art
school with Freddie Mercury.
778
00:40:23,347 --> 00:40:24,723
- What?
- Mmm.
779
00:40:24,883 --> 00:40:26,904
I mean, everyone always talks about
780
00:40:26,914 --> 00:40:29,270
his amazing four-octave vocal range.
781
00:40:29,270 --> 00:40:31,272
But my father always insisted
782
00:40:31,272 --> 00:40:34,758
that if you actually asked Freddie
what his greatest talent was,
783
00:40:34,769 --> 00:40:36,687
he would've said flipping straights.
784
00:40:38,898 --> 00:40:41,532
- [BOTH] Come on, Richmond!
- You lads still have a way!
785
00:40:41,532 --> 00:40:42,616
[FANS CHEERING]
786
00:40:44,477 --> 00:40:46,659
- Hey! Hey!
- [BAZ EXCLAIMS]
787
00:40:46,670 --> 00:40:49,331
Hey, thanks for saving us a seat.
How long have you been waiting?
788
00:40:49,331 --> 00:40:51,041
Mae let me sleep here last night.
789
00:40:51,041 --> 00:40:53,878
- How many beers do you want?
- Three, Mae.
790
00:40:54,457 --> 00:40:57,877
How many beers do you want if you
can't order again before halftime?
791
00:40:58,565 --> 00:40:59,566
[ALL] Twelve.
792
00:41:00,195 --> 00:41:03,866
[ARLO] Welcome, everyone. Today,
Manchester City hosts AFC Richmond.
793
00:41:03,877 --> 00:41:06,480
A first-ever win at the Etihad Stadium
794
00:41:06,491 --> 00:41:08,905
for the Greyhounds, however unlikely,
795
00:41:08,916 --> 00:41:11,794
leaves the door open next
week for Ted Lasso's men
796
00:41:11,805 --> 00:41:15,593
to complete the Cinderella story
their fans have been dreaming of.
797
00:41:15,604 --> 00:41:17,189
Oh, there he is. Look at him.
798
00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:19,577
[ARLO] The City faithful
are letting Jamie Tartt know
799
00:41:19,588 --> 00:41:21,456
how they feel about their former player
800
00:41:21,467 --> 00:41:23,426
who left them for reality television.
801
00:41:23,437 --> 00:41:26,890
- [MANCHESTER CITY FANS BOOING]
- Welcome home, dickhead! [LAUGHS]
802
00:41:26,901 --> 00:41:29,612
[ARLO] Perhaps not the homecoming
he might have dreamt of.
803
00:41:30,689 --> 00:41:31,694
Oh, boy.
804
00:41:31,872 --> 00:41:35,461
Come on, Son. That's it,
that's it. Fucking bastards.
805
00:41:35,461 --> 00:41:38,005
[ARLO] City can clinch the
title with a win today.
806
00:41:38,005 --> 00:41:41,342
A loss makes things very
interesting next week.
807
00:41:41,342 --> 00:41:44,970
We find out in 90
minutes that starts now.
808
00:41:45,036 --> 00:41:46,036
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
809
00:41:48,015 --> 00:41:50,309
[MANCHESTER CITY FANS BOOING]
810
00:41:50,798 --> 00:41:52,633
[ARLO] Ooh, clattered!
811
00:41:52,777 --> 00:41:55,022
[CHRIS] Tartt can expect
a lot of that today.
812
00:41:55,022 --> 00:41:57,483
[BOOING CONTINUES]
813
00:42:03,027 --> 00:42:05,062
Here are some complimentary nuts.
814
00:42:05,073 --> 00:42:07,364
And I'll be back to
get your drinks. Okay?
815
00:42:07,375 --> 00:42:11,276
[ARLO] Physical play from City
as Tartt pushes Richmond forward.
816
00:42:12,063 --> 00:42:14,944
- Tartt has options.
- Colin's open.
817
00:42:16,866 --> 00:42:18,976
[ARLO] Oh, a nifty
move finds Bumbercatch.
818
00:42:18,987 --> 00:42:20,371
The Swiss crosses to the far post.
819
00:42:20,382 --> 00:42:22,384
- Hughes!
- [FANS CHEERING]
820
00:42:22,517 --> 00:42:24,311
- [ARLO] The match has barely begun...
- Yes.
821
00:42:24,322 --> 00:42:26,532
- ... and the Welshman fires the Greyhounds...
- [BOTH CHEER]
822
00:42:26,595 --> 00:42:29,431
- ... into the lead with a commanding header.
- [BOTH CHEER]
823
00:42:29,606 --> 00:42:30,746
There we go.
824
00:42:30,757 --> 00:42:34,160
[CHRIS] That goal was all down to
Tartt. He's seeing two passes ahead.
825
00:42:34,171 --> 00:42:37,470
[ARLO] Brilliant play indeed
from the unsinkable Jamie Tartt.
826
00:42:37,481 --> 00:42:42,134
Colin Hughes with the exclamation
point, and Richmond leads 1-nil.
827
00:42:42,145 --> 00:42:45,940
[PATRONS CHEERING]
828
00:42:45,965 --> 00:42:50,261
- [LAUGHS, CHEERS]
- [SQUEALS] Yes!
829
00:42:50,989 --> 00:42:52,366
Leslie, what you doing?
830
00:42:52,485 --> 00:42:55,196
I'll celebrate when the
final whistle has blown.
831
00:42:55,207 --> 00:42:57,245
I don't wanna move and jinx it.
832
00:42:58,209 --> 00:43:01,379
- Okay. [CHEERING]
- [KEELEY CHEERING]
833
00:43:03,771 --> 00:43:06,257
[ARLO] With the great Pep
Guardiola at the controls,
834
00:43:06,268 --> 00:43:09,138
rest assured, City won't
be quaking in their boots.
835
00:43:09,138 --> 00:43:10,429
What's this sharp-dressed son
836
00:43:10,439 --> 00:43:12,513
- of a gun got cookin' now, huh?
- Go.
837
00:43:12,524 --> 00:43:14,448
[CHRIS] You know Pep will
make the right adjustments.
838
00:43:14,458 --> 00:43:15,519
He always does.
839
00:43:15,530 --> 00:43:16,615
Hold on tight.
840
00:43:17,226 --> 00:43:18,428
All right! Here we go!
841
00:43:18,439 --> 00:43:19,905
[ARLO] Halftime approaches, and the
842
00:43:19,916 --> 00:43:22,735
Premier League title remains undecided.
843
00:43:22,735 --> 00:43:24,195
[MANCHESTER CITY FANS BOOING]
844
00:43:24,195 --> 00:43:27,364
[ARLO] Jamie Tartt's hometown fans
are still letting him have it.
845
00:43:28,407 --> 00:43:31,243
City continuing to target
Richmond's number nine.
846
00:43:31,243 --> 00:43:34,038
Case in point, as Tartt
is knocked off the ball.
847
00:43:38,036 --> 00:43:39,913
And here comes City.
848
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:44,006
De Villardi shoots! Van
Damme makes a terrific save.
849
00:43:46,762 --> 00:43:50,349
City making Tartt fight
for every inch out there.
850
00:43:52,308 --> 00:43:54,894
Piss off back down South, pretty boy!
851
00:43:55,140 --> 00:43:58,352
[ARLO] Tough crowd,
Jamie Tartt. Tough crowd.
852
00:43:58,771 --> 00:44:00,272
We're in the 65th minute.
853
00:44:00,272 --> 00:44:03,567
And since Richmond's early
goal, it's been one-way traffic.
854
00:44:03,593 --> 00:44:08,431
City asking plenty of questions, but
so far Richmond are not listening.
855
00:44:10,782 --> 00:44:13,255
Oh, a sliver of space for De Villardi.
856
00:44:13,554 --> 00:44:15,389
Is this the equalizer?
857
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:19,362
No! A swashbuckling save
by the masked Canadian.
858
00:44:19,384 --> 00:44:20,907
[CHRIS] Van damn he's been good today!
859
00:44:20,918 --> 00:44:22,294
- [ALL CHEERING]
- Come on!
860
00:44:22,294 --> 00:44:23,379
Yeah!
861
00:44:23,379 --> 00:44:25,369
[ARLO] Nearing the 80-minute mark,
862
00:44:25,380 --> 00:44:27,616
Richmond are defending
their one-goal lead.
863
00:44:29,264 --> 00:44:31,099
Ndour takes the corner.
864
00:44:31,110 --> 00:44:34,462
Van Damme races off his line
to punch, but it finds Elokobi.
865
00:44:34,473 --> 00:44:36,225
De Villardi has an open goal.
866
00:44:36,225 --> 00:44:39,395
- Jamie Tartt soars to clear the danger!
- Yes, Jamie!
867
00:44:39,395 --> 00:44:40,813
[ALL CHEERING]
868
00:44:40,813 --> 00:44:41,897
Yes, Jamie!
869
00:44:41,897 --> 00:44:43,473
- [JAMIE GROANS]
- [ARLO] Oh, no.
870
00:44:43,484 --> 00:44:46,150
It looks like Tartt is
in quite a bit of pain.
871
00:44:46,318 --> 00:44:48,112
- [PLAYERS CLAMORING]
- [CHRIS] It's his ankle, Arlo.
872
00:44:48,112 --> 00:44:51,031
- He landed on it wrong.
- Get up, you soft prick!
873
00:44:51,031 --> 00:44:53,576
[CROWD LAUGHING]
874
00:44:53,576 --> 00:44:54,660
Come on.
875
00:44:54,934 --> 00:44:56,269
Is he okay?
876
00:44:56,415 --> 00:44:57,685
[THIERRY] Let's go.
877
00:45:00,023 --> 00:45:01,499
Roberts! Get warm.
878
00:45:01,716 --> 00:45:03,699
- I'm good, good. Go, bro. Go, go.
- You good?
879
00:45:04,169 --> 00:45:05,254
[JAMIE GRUNTS]
880
00:45:07,070 --> 00:45:10,054
Now hold on. He's up,
he's up, he's up. Okay.
881
00:45:10,287 --> 00:45:12,052
[ARLO] It appears he'll give it a go.
882
00:45:12,052 --> 00:45:15,764
Good news for Richmond, who can ill
afford to play without their star.
883
00:45:15,764 --> 00:45:18,100
Not with this much at stake.
884
00:45:20,919 --> 00:45:22,837
[GROANS]
885
00:45:23,426 --> 00:45:24,435
- [ALL GROAN]
- [WHISTLE BLOWS]
886
00:45:24,446 --> 00:45:26,211
[ARLO] We may have
spoken too soon, Chris.
887
00:45:26,222 --> 00:45:28,534
Tartt tried to soldier on,
but now he's in
888
00:45:28,544 --> 00:45:30,660
some distress and
may require attention.
889
00:45:30,671 --> 00:45:31,755
Oh, my God.
890
00:45:37,119 --> 00:45:39,445
- [GRUNTING]
- [MEDIC 1] Up you go.
891
00:45:40,009 --> 00:45:41,177
[MEDIC 2] Get you on the walk.
892
00:45:41,542 --> 00:45:43,406
Fudge.
893
00:45:43,417 --> 00:45:45,419
[FANS APPLAUDING, WHISTLING]
894
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:52,081
- We're finished. We're done.
- Come on.
895
00:45:52,092 --> 00:45:54,034
- We're done.
- Come on, James.
896
00:45:56,793 --> 00:45:59,068
Roberts! You're going in.
897
00:45:59,079 --> 00:46:00,601
Whoa, hold on, hold on. Hey, hey,
898
00:46:00,601 --> 00:46:02,685
hey, don't hop out there
quite yet, Tan, okay?
899
00:46:02,841 --> 00:46:05,632
- Coach, we're a man down.
- I know, Coach. Just give me one second.
900
00:46:06,585 --> 00:46:08,722
Hey, Jamie, are you sure
you can't get back out there?
901
00:46:08,733 --> 00:46:11,360
- Uh, yeah.
- Yeah?
902
00:46:11,371 --> 00:46:12,458
- No.
- Hmm?
903
00:46:12,469 --> 00:46:15,636
- Hey, Coach! You wanna play with ten men?
- [TED] Yeah.
904
00:46:15,647 --> 00:46:18,532
Heck yeah! [CHUCKLES]
Right, eh? [CLICKS TONGUE]
905
00:46:18,752 --> 00:46:20,880
We're just gonna wait and see, okay?
906
00:46:21,570 --> 00:46:23,077
And we'll check in on you, all right?
907
00:46:23,088 --> 00:46:26,641
You two, do me a favor. Heal
him. Use all your tricks, please.
908
00:46:28,035 --> 00:46:30,662
Okay. Yeah. We're gonna
give him a couple minutes.
909
00:46:30,673 --> 00:46:33,551
- He's gonna be fine. Here we go. Come on!
- [ARLO] Ted Lasso elects to wait,
910
00:46:33,551 --> 00:46:36,792
leaving ten Greyhounds
against City's mighty 11.
911
00:46:36,803 --> 00:46:39,587
- [CROWD ROARING]
- [ARLO] City looking for the equalizer.
912
00:46:39,598 --> 00:46:42,852
And Orellano shoots. Van Damme
is there! And there again!
913
00:46:42,852 --> 00:46:44,061
[FANS CHEERING]
914
00:46:44,254 --> 00:46:45,437
[ARLO] And again!
915
00:46:45,437 --> 00:46:48,858
There's just no penetrating
the mask of Van Damme!
916
00:46:49,105 --> 00:46:51,193
With his team facing
relentless pressure,
917
00:46:51,193 --> 00:46:52,987
- Ted Lasso is gambling with each...
- [SNIFFS]
918
00:46:52,987 --> 00:46:55,157
- ... passing second he plays with a man down.
- I'm gonna need a word, Nate.
919
00:46:55,168 --> 00:46:56,604
- In my office, yeah?
- Yeah.
920
00:46:56,615 --> 00:46:59,243
[CHRIS] I love gambling.
Makes me feel alive.
921
00:46:59,243 --> 00:47:01,537
[ARLO] You should probably talk
to somebody about that, Chris.
922
00:47:02,538 --> 00:47:05,232
Hello, mate. Come in. Take a seat.
923
00:47:05,892 --> 00:47:08,259
Here we go. [SIGHS] Mmm.
924
00:47:10,243 --> 00:47:12,787
[SIGHS] Am I getting promoted?
925
00:47:12,798 --> 00:47:14,717
[SIGHS] Nate, I gotta let you go.
926
00:47:15,325 --> 00:47:19,037
- W-Was it 'cause I was watching telly?
- No.
927
00:47:19,111 --> 00:47:20,461
I'm not pushing desserts hard enough?
928
00:47:20,472 --> 00:47:22,892
No, no, no. It's...
It's nothing you've done.
929
00:47:22,892 --> 00:47:27,771
You're my top man. You're on time,
you don't steal, you're sober.
930
00:47:28,171 --> 00:47:30,842
You're like my little
unicorn. You know what I mean?
931
00:47:31,087 --> 00:47:35,518
And it breaks my heart to say this,
but Jade said if I didn't fire you,
932
00:47:35,529 --> 00:47:37,242
she was gonna report me to the...
933
00:47:37,833 --> 00:47:40,023
Well, I can't say who, because
then you'd know what I've done.
934
00:47:40,034 --> 00:47:43,746
But... [CLEARS THROAT] ... my
hands are tied. You gotta go.
935
00:47:43,746 --> 00:47:46,957
[BREATHES SHAKILY] Yeah.
936
00:47:48,375 --> 00:47:50,753
[FANS CHEERING]
937
00:47:55,163 --> 00:47:56,414
[ROY, COACH BEARD] Yeah!
938
00:47:56,425 --> 00:47:58,177
[ARLO] Chris, Richmond
aren't playing with a keeper.
939
00:47:58,177 --> 00:48:00,262
They've got a brick wall
in front of the goal.
940
00:48:00,262 --> 00:48:03,182
[CHRIS] No, Arlo, that's a person.
I can see his arms and legs.
941
00:48:03,182 --> 00:48:04,725
And his hideous mask.
942
00:48:04,725 --> 00:48:08,312
[ARLO] It seems like it's only a
matter of time before City equalize.
943
00:48:08,312 --> 00:48:11,524
That's all they need to
clinch the league title today.
944
00:48:11,524 --> 00:48:13,727
Hey, Coach, I don't
want Jamie to play hurt.
945
00:48:13,925 --> 00:48:15,385
But we gotta make a decision here.
946
00:48:15,396 --> 00:48:16,893
Personally, I'm fine
with him playing hurt.
947
00:48:16,904 --> 00:48:18,113
I played hurt all the time.
948
00:48:18,124 --> 00:48:19,668
You can't walk up stairs.
949
00:48:19,679 --> 00:48:22,140
Okay. Let me go check, all right?
950
00:48:23,328 --> 00:48:25,479
- Thanks, y'all. Thank you.
- [BREATHING HEAVILY]
951
00:48:28,169 --> 00:48:29,671
What you looking for up there, Jamie?
952
00:48:30,195 --> 00:48:33,535
Looking for my dad. I can't find
him. It's freaking me the fuck out.
953
00:48:33,546 --> 00:48:34,747
[TED] Yeah, I get that.
954
00:48:34,758 --> 00:48:37,132
It's like when you don't
know where Freddy Krueger is.
955
00:48:37,132 --> 00:48:39,051
'Cause you know it's the
second he's gonna pop up
956
00:48:39,051 --> 00:48:40,719
and stick that knife-hand
of his in your face.
957
00:48:40,719 --> 00:48:42,638
Yeah, Freddy Krueger's
fucking terrifying.
958
00:48:42,638 --> 00:48:44,390
Yeah, well, he had a rough childhood.
959
00:48:44,390 --> 00:48:46,058
And as we all know,
hurt people hurt people.
960
00:48:46,058 --> 00:48:48,102
Sometimes they just do
it with their knife-hands.
961
00:48:48,521 --> 00:48:50,149
When's the last time you saw your dad?
962
00:48:50,895 --> 00:48:55,314
- Wembley. [PANTS]
- Hmm. Y'all talk since then?
963
00:48:55,970 --> 00:48:58,181
- Nope. [SIGHS]
- Hmm.
964
00:48:58,307 --> 00:49:00,395
Okay. If you could talk to
him now, what would you say?
965
00:49:00,406 --> 00:49:02,199
I'd say, "Fuck you." [SIGHS]
966
00:49:02,199 --> 00:49:04,076
- Mmm, yeah. Makes sense.
- [SIGHS]
967
00:49:04,076 --> 00:49:06,136
- Anything else?
- Yeah.
968
00:49:06,372 --> 00:49:09,268
Yeah, I'd say, "Thank you."
969
00:49:13,444 --> 00:49:15,073
You know, Jamie, if hating your Pops
970
00:49:15,084 --> 00:49:16,338
ain't motivating you like it used to,
971
00:49:16,338 --> 00:49:18,443
it might be time to
try something different.
972
00:49:19,901 --> 00:49:21,069
Just forgive him.
973
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:23,439
Oh, fuck no. I ain't giving him that.
974
00:49:23,450 --> 00:49:25,661
Mm-mmm, no. You ain't
giving him anything.
975
00:49:25,921 --> 00:49:29,662
When you choose to do that,
you're giving that to yourself.
976
00:49:30,155 --> 00:49:31,990
[CROWD CHEERS]
977
00:49:37,066 --> 00:49:40,003
- Come on. [GRUNTS]
- Okay. [GRUNTING]
978
00:49:40,195 --> 00:49:41,963
- How do you feel?
- [EXHALING HEAVILY]
979
00:49:42,441 --> 00:49:46,286
- Yeah. Yeah, I feel good, Coach. Yeah.
- Yeah. See, the talk helped, right?
980
00:49:46,965 --> 00:49:49,456
Mostly the painkillers and
the adrenaline, I think. But...
981
00:49:49,661 --> 00:49:51,663
But yeah, the talk helped, yeah.
982
00:49:52,011 --> 00:49:54,627
Good. Now get your buns
out there. Let's go.
983
00:49:54,627 --> 00:49:56,045
[JAMIE] Okay, okay.
984
00:49:56,629 --> 00:49:58,631
[MANCHESTER CITY FANS BOOING]
985
00:50:05,253 --> 00:50:06,254
Come on.
986
00:50:10,481 --> 00:50:12,817
Here we fucking go. Come on, Jamie!
987
00:50:14,198 --> 00:50:17,388
[ARLO] Jamie Tartt with a
dramatic return to play.
988
00:50:17,399 --> 00:50:20,277
And he makes sure he lets the
City fans know all about it.
989
00:50:20,277 --> 00:50:22,530
[BOOING]
990
00:50:22,643 --> 00:50:25,937
That's it, baby! You fucking show 'em!
991
00:50:27,163 --> 00:50:28,163
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
992
00:50:29,995 --> 00:50:31,038
Hey, come on, come on, come on.
993
00:50:31,038 --> 00:50:33,415
[ALL CHEERING, SINGING] ♪ Jamie
Tartt, do, do, do, do, do, do ♪
994
00:50:33,415 --> 00:50:35,560
♪ Jamie Tartt Do, do, do, do, do, do ♪
995
00:50:36,295 --> 00:50:38,757
[ARLO] Richmond have
their backs against the wall.
996
00:50:39,140 --> 00:50:41,048
It's De Villardi again.
997
00:50:41,048 --> 00:50:43,175
But Van Damme collects comfortably.
998
00:50:43,515 --> 00:50:48,597
And the Canadian, wasting no time,
finds McAdoo. And Richmond are off!
999
00:50:49,775 --> 00:50:52,204
Oh, that's astonishing
control from Tartt!
1000
00:50:52,215 --> 00:50:53,330
Ooh! Ooh!
1001
00:50:53,341 --> 00:50:56,250
- What's happening? Thank you.
- Oh!
1002
00:50:57,324 --> 00:50:58,858
[ARLO] Tartt cuts inside.
1003
00:50:59,525 --> 00:51:00,526
And again.
1004
00:51:01,850 --> 00:51:03,602
Oh, he's untouchable!
1005
00:51:07,501 --> 00:51:10,253
- [FOOT IMPACTS BALL]
- [WHOOSHING]
1006
00:51:11,093 --> 00:51:13,237
- [BALL HITS NET]
- [FANS CHEERING]
1007
00:51:14,187 --> 00:51:17,148
- [CHEERS] Go, Jamie!
- Yes! Yeah! [CHEERS]
1008
00:51:17,209 --> 00:51:20,504
[ALL SHOUTING, CHEERING]
1009
00:51:20,504 --> 00:51:24,133
[ARLO] And Jamie Tartt all but
clinches the win for Richmond
1010
00:51:24,133 --> 00:51:26,927
- with a spectacular solo goal!
- My goodness! Did you see that?
1011
00:51:26,927 --> 00:51:29,597
- [CHEERING, SCREAMING]
- Yes, Jamie!
1012
00:51:30,975 --> 00:51:33,339
[ARLO] And a class move
from the native Mancunian,
1013
00:51:33,350 --> 00:51:36,478
not to celebrate
against his former club.
1014
00:51:38,962 --> 00:51:39,963
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
1015
00:51:40,474 --> 00:51:43,413
[ARLO] And Richmond with
a late substitution.
1016
00:51:48,422 --> 00:51:49,824
Attaboy, Jamie!
1017
00:51:53,088 --> 00:51:54,463
[PLAYER] Well done.
1018
00:51:57,067 --> 00:52:00,408
- Jamie Tartt, you fucking king!
- [FANS CHEERING]
1019
00:52:00,419 --> 00:52:02,254
- [FANS APPLAUDING]
- [ARLO] Tartt makes way.
1020
00:52:02,254 --> 00:52:05,428
And listen to this response
from the City supporters,
1021
00:52:05,439 --> 00:52:09,000
an ovation for a visiting
player who was also one of their own.
1022
00:52:09,011 --> 00:52:11,805
- You don't hear this every day.
- Come on.
1023
00:52:11,805 --> 00:52:14,490
[ARLO] Just think of what it
means for Tartt to hear this.
1024
00:52:14,501 --> 00:52:17,129
- And what it means for his family.
- [SIGHS] Yes. Oh, my God.
1025
00:52:17,186 --> 00:52:19,146
- [MUMBLES]
- Oh, my God.
1026
00:52:21,721 --> 00:52:24,568
- [LAUGHING]
- [SCREAMING]
1027
00:52:24,568 --> 00:52:27,696
- Fucking beautiful. [GASPS]
- That was amazing.
1028
00:52:27,696 --> 00:52:29,657
[SIGHING]
1029
00:52:36,075 --> 00:52:37,076
Jamie.
1030
00:52:37,703 --> 00:52:39,037
[ROY WHISPERS]
1031
00:52:46,491 --> 00:52:47,664
He's a tough kid.
1032
00:52:47,675 --> 00:52:49,343
His dad would have been proud.
1033
00:52:53,055 --> 00:52:54,974
[APPLAUDING]
1034
00:52:55,385 --> 00:52:56,720
[ARLO] Credit where it's due.
1035
00:52:56,731 --> 00:53:00,217
Lasso rolled the dice on Tartt's
fitness and the team's talisman
1036
00:53:00,228 --> 00:53:01,771
rose to the occasion.
1037
00:53:03,503 --> 00:53:06,506
With time running out, City
try and cross into the box.
1038
00:53:06,517 --> 00:53:08,131
But again, Van Damme is there.
1039
00:53:08,142 --> 00:53:10,603
- [WHISTLE BLOWING]
- [CHEERS]
1040
00:53:10,614 --> 00:53:13,200
[SCREAMING, CHEERING]
1041
00:53:13,200 --> 00:53:16,182
[ARLO] And after that sterling
performance from Richmond,
1042
00:53:16,193 --> 00:53:17,926
the Premier League title will come
1043
00:53:17,937 --> 00:53:19,999
down to the final week of the season.
1044
00:53:19,999 --> 00:53:22,626
Chris, they could win
the whole effing thing!
1045
00:53:22,626 --> 00:53:25,212
[CHRIS] Sorry for the almost
brutal language there, folks.
1046
00:53:25,212 --> 00:53:27,756
- It's that time. Holy crap.
- [LAUGHING]
1047
00:53:27,756 --> 00:53:30,475
- Good game. Congratulations.
- Thanks, Coach. I appreciate it.
1048
00:53:30,486 --> 00:53:33,076
Hey, I gotta be honest with you.
You're a tough guy to beat, man.
1049
00:53:33,087 --> 00:53:36,011
[CHUCKLES] Nah, don't
worry about wins or losses.
1050
00:53:36,022 --> 00:53:37,390
Just help these guys
1051
00:53:37,401 --> 00:53:39,617
be the best version of
themselves on and off the pitch.
1052
00:53:39,628 --> 00:53:41,545
This, at the end, is
the most important thing.
1053
00:53:41,556 --> 00:53:43,057
I couldn't agree more, Coach.
1054
00:53:43,068 --> 00:53:44,569
All right, then. Take care.
1055
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:47,401
[GASPS]
1056
00:53:48,027 --> 00:53:49,069
[SCREAMS]
1057
00:53:49,069 --> 00:53:50,344
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
1058
00:53:50,355 --> 00:53:51,697
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
1059
00:53:51,697 --> 00:53:54,570
- Boss. Hey, it's good to see you.
- Good to see you too.
1060
00:53:54,742 --> 00:53:59,038
[NO AUDIO]
1061
00:54:00,692 --> 00:54:02,277
[PLAYERS CHEERING]
1062
00:54:21,685 --> 00:54:23,687
[CHATTERING]
1063
00:54:27,770 --> 00:54:30,314
- All right, lads. Listen up.
- [PLAYER] All right. Yo, what's up?
1064
00:54:30,325 --> 00:54:32,654
We've got one more game, so that means
1065
00:54:32,665 --> 00:54:33,867
a glass of water with every single
1066
00:54:33,878 --> 00:54:36,700
- alcoholic beverage tonight, all right?
- [PLAYERS CHEERING]
1067
00:54:36,700 --> 00:54:38,953
- We rolling?
- No, no. I've gotta get this sorted out.
1068
00:54:38,953 --> 00:54:40,412
But you have fun with your water, yeah?
1069
00:54:40,412 --> 00:54:42,498
[CHUCKLES]
1070
00:54:44,187 --> 00:54:46,032
- [COCKBURN] There's my lad. Do you proud.
- Nice.
1071
00:54:46,043 --> 00:54:48,128
- Yeah, you bet, bruv. All right, love.
- Hey, take care, bruv.
1072
00:54:48,128 --> 00:54:49,380
- Love.
- That's what I like, man.
1073
00:54:49,380 --> 00:54:51,006
- Be good. Be good.
- [COLIN] Rest up, man.
1074
00:54:51,006 --> 00:54:52,842
Hey, listen, man. I wanna
say I'm proud of you.
1075
00:54:52,842 --> 00:54:55,427
- You played so well today, man.
- Ah, appreciate it, man.
1076
00:54:55,427 --> 00:54:57,591
- You scored a goal. Come on. Hey.
- Thanks, Jamie.
1077
00:54:57,602 --> 00:54:59,379
[SPEAKS SPANISH] Well done tonight.
1078
00:54:59,390 --> 00:55:01,493
Thank you, man. Big love, amigo.
1079
00:55:05,461 --> 00:55:06,462
[SIGHS]
1080
00:55:06,473 --> 00:55:11,228
[WHISTLING] All right, buddy.
1081
00:55:11,550 --> 00:55:13,507
I will see you at karaoke.
1082
00:55:13,518 --> 00:55:16,688
I will of course sign us up
for "Islands in the Stream."
1083
00:55:16,699 --> 00:55:18,367
But I'm calling dibs on
Dolly. [SNAPS FINGERS]
1084
00:55:18,367 --> 00:55:19,869
No can do, Coach. [SIGHS]
1085
00:55:21,072 --> 00:55:23,819
Mom's cooking dinner
tonight. Last night in town.
1086
00:55:23,830 --> 00:55:25,916
All right. Well, give Dottie my love.
1087
00:55:25,916 --> 00:55:28,691
Will do. Actually, hold on a sec, Coach.
1088
00:55:28,701 --> 00:55:31,012
Come here. Check this out. [CHUCKLES]
1089
00:55:35,578 --> 00:55:38,751
- Uh...
- No, no. I know you've already seen it.
1090
00:55:38,762 --> 00:55:41,348
I just don't know if you've watched
the whole thing. Look. Look, look.
1091
00:55:42,705 --> 00:55:43,706
All right.
1092
00:55:44,731 --> 00:55:46,694
So look. After we came in,
1093
00:55:46,801 --> 00:55:50,274
Nate had to hide under my desk
here for, like, three whole hours
1094
00:55:50,274 --> 00:55:52,362
while we were all whooping and hollering
1095
00:55:52,373 --> 00:55:55,100
and celebrating all
around him. [CHUCKLES]
1096
00:55:55,191 --> 00:55:58,529
Then, once we all split, he
thought he was in the clear.
1097
00:55:58,907 --> 00:56:00,951
And boom! Cleaning crew shows up.
1098
00:56:00,971 --> 00:56:05,809
Oh, man. That's another two
hours under that desk. Yep.
1099
00:56:07,895 --> 00:56:11,089
Well, then after they
leave, he crawls out.
1100
00:56:11,282 --> 00:56:14,452
His legs just gotta be
jelly. He can barely stand up.
1101
00:56:14,937 --> 00:56:16,901
Look at this.
He goes to check the doors,
1102
00:56:16,911 --> 00:56:19,803
but they're all locked! [CHUCKLES]
1103
00:56:19,803 --> 00:56:21,639
Oh, man, that son of a gun
1104
00:56:21,639 --> 00:56:24,558
had to climb out the window here
just to get out of the building.
1105
00:56:25,119 --> 00:56:28,039
[CHUCKLES, SIGHS]
1106
00:56:28,592 --> 00:56:30,136
You know, I don't know about you, Coach.
1107
00:56:30,147 --> 00:56:35,611
But I hope that either all
of us or none of us are judged
1108
00:56:35,611 --> 00:56:37,905
by the actions of our weakest moments,
1109
00:56:39,112 --> 00:56:41,940
but rather by the strength we show
1110
00:56:41,951 --> 00:56:46,580
when and if we're ever
given a second chance.
1111
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:53,922
All right, have fun
tonight, Coach. [GRUNTS]
1112
00:56:54,015 --> 00:56:58,103
♪ And we rely on each other, ah ha ♪
1113
00:56:58,896 --> 00:57:02,608
[WHISTLING]
1114
00:57:02,716 --> 00:57:05,042
Fuck.
1115
00:57:12,779 --> 00:57:14,886
_
1116
00:57:16,527 --> 00:57:17,528
[MESSAGE SENT SOUND EFFECT]
1117
00:57:21,438 --> 00:57:22,606
[KNOCKS]
1118
00:57:23,552 --> 00:57:26,346
- Hi.
- Hey. What are you guys doing?
1119
00:57:26,453 --> 00:57:28,414
We thought we'd come
and keep you company.
1120
00:57:28,414 --> 00:57:31,000
- Fucking celebrate.
- Yeah!
1121
00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:33,586
- [JAMIE CHUCKLES]
- 'Cause that was fucking amazing, Jamie.
1122
00:57:34,119 --> 00:57:35,577
Yeah, I was fucking
amazing. You're right.
1123
00:57:35,588 --> 00:57:37,590
- [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES] Yes.
1124
00:57:37,796 --> 00:57:39,547
- Ey!
- [KEELEY] Whoo!
1125
00:57:40,584 --> 00:57:43,438
- You start us off.
- Mmm. Don't mind if I do.
1126
00:57:43,449 --> 00:57:46,348
Right. What the fuck
happened, man? [CHUCKLES]
1127
00:57:46,348 --> 00:57:47,933
[KEELEY CHUCKLES]
1128
00:57:48,141 --> 00:57:52,813
- Did I look sexy? [CHUCKLES]
- [LAUGHING]
1129
00:57:52,813 --> 00:57:54,648
Shame you weren't injured
in your fucking head, innit?
1130
00:57:54,648 --> 00:57:56,358
- [CHUCKLING]
- [LAUGHS]
1131
00:57:59,351 --> 00:58:00,352
I'm back.
1132
00:58:02,210 --> 00:58:03,211
Hey, babe. You all right?
1133
00:58:03,222 --> 00:58:05,391
Someone never came
for their pickup order.
1134
00:58:05,402 --> 00:58:07,988
Oh, thank you. Great.
1135
00:58:10,295 --> 00:58:15,628
So, um, I don't know if you
heard, but Derek fired me today.
1136
00:58:16,419 --> 00:58:18,254
That bastard!
1137
00:58:18,568 --> 00:58:21,821
- Yeah. I was devastated.
- [SIGHS]
1138
00:58:23,701 --> 00:58:26,920
But it made me realize that even
though there's only one match left,
1139
00:58:26,931 --> 00:58:29,924
I have to go back to
Richmond. To make things right.
1140
00:58:32,112 --> 00:58:33,834
Currently writing Ted an apology letter.
1141
00:58:33,845 --> 00:58:37,191
It's 60 pages, but I'm just
looking for a few trims, so...
1142
00:58:37,191 --> 00:58:39,564
- [DOORBELL RINGS]
- Ooh. [GRUNTS] Two secs.
1143
00:58:40,402 --> 00:58:42,655
[SIGHS, MUMBLING] Sixty pages.
1144
00:58:45,183 --> 00:58:46,183
Oh, my God.
1145
00:58:59,364 --> 00:59:00,824
You here to kill me?
1146
00:59:02,112 --> 00:59:04,418
Ted and I met playing college football.
1147
00:59:05,336 --> 00:59:08,005
He was the backup punter.
I was the backup kicker.
1148
00:59:08,112 --> 00:59:09,447
We never got in a game,
1149
00:59:09,986 --> 00:59:13,824
but we spent a lot of time together,
jogging and doing box jumps.
1150
00:59:15,354 --> 00:59:16,897
After school, we went our separate ways.
1151
00:59:16,908 --> 00:59:19,452
And he was dating
Michelle, got into coaching.
1152
00:59:20,268 --> 00:59:21,353
And I got into prison.
1153
00:59:23,064 --> 00:59:24,232
When I got paroled...
1154
00:59:25,994 --> 00:59:29,726
I had no money, family didn't
want me. I had nowhere to go.
1155
00:59:30,357 --> 00:59:31,483
So I looked up Ted.
1156
00:59:33,706 --> 00:59:36,041
He took me in, fed me.
1157
00:59:37,075 --> 00:59:38,452
Let me crash on his couch.
1158
00:59:39,973 --> 00:59:43,226
And in return, I stole his car.
1159
00:59:45,255 --> 00:59:46,715
Now, I didn't get far.
1160
00:59:48,034 --> 00:59:50,436
And I would've gone
straight back to prison
1161
00:59:50,506 --> 00:59:53,110
if Ted didn't come down
there and convince those cops
1162
00:59:53,120 --> 00:59:54,643
that he gave me the car.
1163
00:59:55,562 --> 00:59:56,687
Just like in Les Mis.
1164
00:59:56,687 --> 00:59:58,939
Our story is very similar
to Les Mis, yes.
1165
00:59:59,362 --> 01:00:01,031
- You went to prison?
- Yes.
1166
01:00:01,151 --> 01:00:02,944
For stealing a loaf of meth.
1167
01:00:05,076 --> 01:00:06,950
And then I stole from my friend.
1168
01:00:08,954 --> 01:00:11,874
Who forgave me. [SIGHS]
1169
01:00:12,306 --> 01:00:15,643
And gave me a job. And a life.
1170
01:00:19,009 --> 01:00:21,970
So to honor that, I forgive you.
1171
01:00:23,930 --> 01:00:28,143
I offer you a job. And
the life part's up to you.
1172
01:00:35,292 --> 01:00:36,418
Thank you.
1173
01:00:39,313 --> 01:00:40,356
[SIGHS]
1174
01:00:42,552 --> 01:00:44,425
You sure you don't wanna headbutt me?
1175
01:00:44,543 --> 01:00:46,538
I think it might make us feel better.
1176
01:00:54,769 --> 01:00:56,854
[INHALES DEEPLY]
1177
01:01:01,758 --> 01:01:03,885
Monday, 10:00 a.m.
1178
01:01:09,677 --> 01:01:12,221
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
1179
01:01:30,698 --> 01:01:33,683
- Hello?
- [DOTTIE] Ooh, welcome home, honey.
1180
01:01:33,694 --> 01:01:37,573
- Come take a seat, you must be starving.
- Yeah, okay.
1181
01:01:37,584 --> 01:01:40,754
Hey, congratulations on your big win.
1182
01:01:40,765 --> 01:01:42,227
I didn't know if you'd be in the mood
1183
01:01:42,238 --> 01:01:44,353
for meat loaf or lasagna,
so I made both.
1184
01:01:44,364 --> 01:01:45,568
- [CHUCKLES]
- [TED] Hmm.
1185
01:01:49,172 --> 01:01:53,165
- Mom, what's wrong? Why are you here?
- What do you mean?
1186
01:01:53,176 --> 01:01:56,059
I mean, if you got something
you need to say to me,
1187
01:01:56,372 --> 01:01:58,214
I'd appreciate it if you
just went ahead and said it.
1188
01:01:58,225 --> 01:02:02,521
Oh, stop. I just want to spend my
last night in London with my son
1189
01:02:02,521 --> 01:02:04,440
and make sure everything's all right.
1190
01:02:04,533 --> 01:02:07,119
Mm-hmm. Yeah, okay.
1191
01:02:07,655 --> 01:02:10,059
Well, thank you for
cooking dinner. Both of 'em.
1192
01:02:10,070 --> 01:02:11,614
Oh, you're welcome.
1193
01:02:13,415 --> 01:02:17,083
- And fuck you for not wanting to talk.
- Excuse me?
1194
01:02:17,094 --> 01:02:20,039
Thank you for flying all
the way here to come see me,
1195
01:02:20,039 --> 01:02:22,409
and fuck you for not
telling me you were coming.
1196
01:02:22,991 --> 01:02:25,472
Thank you for all the small,
1197
01:02:25,516 --> 01:02:27,619
silly, little things you did
for me as a kid, you know?
1198
01:02:27,630 --> 01:02:29,757
Like hiding notes in my lunch box
1199
01:02:29,757 --> 01:02:32,445
or, uh, putting googly eyes on the fruit
1200
01:02:32,455 --> 01:02:34,707
at the supermarket
just to make me laugh.
1201
01:02:34,718 --> 01:02:37,846
And fuck you for not working on yourself
1202
01:02:38,067 --> 01:02:40,444
or seeking help after we lost dad.
1203
01:02:40,725 --> 01:02:42,717
And for not talking
to me about it either.
1204
01:02:42,728 --> 01:02:44,438
Just glossing over the whole thing
1205
01:02:44,438 --> 01:02:47,274
and... and acting like
everything was all right.
1206
01:02:50,719 --> 01:02:53,559
- I'm sorry.
- Mm-hmm.
1207
01:02:55,111 --> 01:02:59,234
Um... [STAMMERS] ... I
didn't know what to do, Ted.
1208
01:02:59,245 --> 01:03:03,374
So, I pretended I was okay.
1209
01:03:03,374 --> 01:03:05,876
Okay. Well, thank you for the apology.
1210
01:03:06,256 --> 01:03:08,962
And fuck you for making me
think I had to pretend too.
1211
01:03:09,572 --> 01:03:13,732
All right. I... I appreciate
you, uh, sharing all this with me.
1212
01:03:14,691 --> 01:03:17,263
I just wish you hadn't
carried it around for so long.
1213
01:03:17,274 --> 01:03:19,193
[SCOFFS] Yeah, okay.
1214
01:03:19,381 --> 01:03:23,207
And, um, you're right, Ted, I
do have something to say to you.
1215
01:03:23,218 --> 01:03:24,803
[GRUNTS] Hmm?
1216
01:03:25,888 --> 01:03:27,709
Your son misses you.
1217
01:03:32,350 --> 01:03:33,727
Yeah, I know.
1218
01:03:36,168 --> 01:03:37,669
I miss him too.
1219
01:03:44,366 --> 01:03:48,995
[SIGHS] It's just like I... [CRYING]
1220
01:03:49,114 --> 01:03:53,536
It's like I'm scared
sometimes to, like...
1221
01:03:53,591 --> 01:03:57,011
[BREATHES SHAKILY] ... to
get close to that little boy.
1222
01:03:57,613 --> 01:03:59,323
Oh, honey, why?
1223
01:04:03,383 --> 01:04:05,093
'Cause I know he's gonna leave.
1224
01:04:10,952 --> 01:04:12,037
Oh, well...
1225
01:04:14,737 --> 01:04:18,032
- God. No, no, no, no. You know...
- [SNIFFS, SIGHS]
1226
01:04:18,032 --> 01:04:20,451
Oh, all right. That is the
thing about being a parent.
1227
01:04:20,451 --> 01:04:21,577
[SIGHS]
1228
01:04:21,577 --> 01:04:23,680
Sometimes you lose and...
1229
01:04:23,691 --> 01:04:27,862
[STAMMERS] ... sometimes you win,
but most of the time you just tie.
1230
01:04:31,391 --> 01:04:34,352
All we can do is keep playing.
1231
01:04:36,214 --> 01:04:40,635
Right. [SIGHS, CHUCKLES]
1232
01:04:40,646 --> 01:04:44,483
[SNIFFLES] Hmm. Thank you.
1233
01:04:47,266 --> 01:04:51,102
- Fuck you. [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES]
1234
01:04:52,749 --> 01:04:54,334
Oh, my goodness.
1235
01:04:54,708 --> 01:04:57,127
I'm sorry about that. I...
1236
01:04:58,026 --> 01:05:00,355
[SIGHS] You know what? Let
me make it up to you, okay?
1237
01:05:00,366 --> 01:05:02,681
Why don't you take
a seat? And I'll, uh...
1238
01:05:02,691 --> 01:05:04,309
and I'll serve you
dinner for once, okay?
1239
01:05:04,320 --> 01:05:08,624
- [CHUCKLES] What? Oh. Ooh. Okay.
- Come on now, pop a squat. Go on.
1240
01:05:08,624 --> 01:05:10,793
- Yeah, yeah. [SIGHS]
- [CHUCKLES]
1241
01:05:11,502 --> 01:05:16,423
Hey. You know, uh, this therapist
must be doing you some good.
1242
01:05:16,423 --> 01:05:18,425
- Oh, boy.
- [CHUCKLES]
1243
01:05:18,425 --> 01:05:20,344
I'm gonna leave her out of this.
1244
01:05:20,344 --> 01:05:23,398
Oh, wait till she
hears about this. Okay.
1245
01:05:23,409 --> 01:05:24,525
You know what?
Let's start with the wine.
1246
01:05:24,536 --> 01:05:26,746
- Let's do, please.
- [DOORBELL RINGS]
1247
01:05:29,984 --> 01:05:32,417
- Bex.
- Hi.
1248
01:05:32,501 --> 01:05:36,422
Sorry to just show up like
this. Um, I need some advice.
1249
01:05:37,805 --> 01:05:40,357
- Okay.
- Can we come in?
1250
01:05:40,552 --> 01:05:41,636
We?
1251
01:05:47,429 --> 01:05:48,430
Of course.
1252
01:06:22,804 --> 01:06:27,936
_
1253
01:07:00,432 --> 01:07:01,768
Morning, Will.
1254
01:07:01,779 --> 01:07:03,156
[WILL] Hey. Good morning, Ted.
1255
01:07:12,071 --> 01:07:14,240
- Hey, Boss.
- Oh. Hello, Ted.
1256
01:07:14,828 --> 01:07:16,330
Do you know this John Wooden?
1257
01:07:16,863 --> 01:07:18,743
No, ma'am. Never had
the chance to meet him.
1258
01:07:18,754 --> 01:07:20,684
Oh, pity. I like this.
1259
01:07:20,695 --> 01:07:22,959
Ah, I mean, if you don't like
that, you don't like ice cream.
1260
01:07:22,970 --> 01:07:25,598
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
- What's up?
1261
01:07:26,726 --> 01:07:29,879
- Do you know what time it is?
- Uh, 9:30.
1262
01:07:29,890 --> 01:07:33,643
Or half nine as you folks say over
here for some goofy-ass reason.
1263
01:07:33,654 --> 01:07:36,448
- Mm-hmm. That's just to annoy Americans.
- [CHUCKLES] Ah. Yeah.
1264
01:07:38,465 --> 01:07:42,319
No, this is that time of year
when I come down here and
1265
01:07:42,780 --> 01:07:45,157
reveal something to you.
1266
01:07:45,326 --> 01:07:48,413
Oh, snap. That's right. Okay.
1267
01:07:48,534 --> 01:07:50,619
- [STAMMERS] Well, here we go.
- [SIGHS]
1268
01:07:50,619 --> 01:07:53,622
[CHUCKLES] Uh, you know what?
Maybe I should guess this year.
1269
01:07:53,622 --> 01:07:55,332
No, no, no, that's silly. Yeah.
1270
01:07:55,332 --> 01:07:58,085
No, you just go ahead and
tell me. Go on, let 'er rip.
1271
01:08:00,002 --> 01:08:02,130
- I've got nothing.
- Hmm.
1272
01:08:02,554 --> 01:08:04,800
Oh, I really tried as well. I
mean, even on the walk over here,
1273
01:08:04,800 --> 01:08:07,826
I was thinking something would
pop into my head, but nope.
1274
01:08:07,837 --> 01:08:10,723
- Absolutely nothing. Sorry, Ted.
- Hmm.
1275
01:08:11,338 --> 01:08:14,048
No truth bomb this year.
1276
01:08:14,059 --> 01:08:19,231
Hmm. Well, that's okay.
[CHUCKLES] I got one.
1277
01:08:23,123 --> 01:08:28,123
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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