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1
00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:04,338
Cheers is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,939
It's amazing what they're
Making for kids nowadays.
3
00:00:05,939 --> 00:00:07,375
What?
4
00:00:07,375 --> 00:00:08,476
Here's an ad for a toy
Where you make a monster,
5
00:00:08,476 --> 00:00:10,944
Then drop him
In a vat of acid,
6
00:00:10,944 --> 00:00:13,181
And boil his skin
Off his bones.
7
00:00:13,181 --> 00:00:15,683
Boy, oh, boy, norm,
8
00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:18,119
When we were kids,
We had real toys to play with,
Remember?
9
00:00:18,119 --> 00:00:19,587
Oh, you're
Damn straight.
10
00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:22,156
I tell you,
I was up in my attic
The other day.
11
00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:24,358
Found my old
Lionel train set.
12
00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:26,927
Oh, now,
There is a toy.
Yeah.
13
00:00:26,927 --> 00:00:29,997
Remember the hours you spent
Sticking those tracks together?
14
00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:31,399
Making the little
Houses just so
15
00:00:31,399 --> 00:00:33,534
And making sure
Those tunnels
Were all straight.
16
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:36,904
Yeah.
Smelling the electricity
Burn off that transformer.
17
00:00:36,904 --> 00:00:38,839
Hey, did you have one
Of those electric cattle cars
18
00:00:38,839 --> 00:00:41,075
Where the cows come
Vibrating down the chute?
19
00:00:41,075 --> 00:00:43,144
I could move 40 head
In 10 minutes, pal.
20
00:00:43,144 --> 00:00:44,412
Go on.
Get out of here.
21
00:00:44,412 --> 00:00:47,481
You get out of here.
I could, too.
22
00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,483
Got to get rid of
That thing, though.
23
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:50,951
It's taking up
Lots of space.
24
00:00:50,951 --> 00:00:52,186
I'll probably
Sell it.
25
00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:54,455
Get a good price
For it, I'll bet you.
26
00:00:54,455 --> 00:00:56,190
Yeah.
It's a collector's item.
27
00:00:56,190 --> 00:00:58,559
Shoot a little stick?
28
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,994
Yeah. Yeah.
29
00:01:00,994 --> 00:01:02,696
Ahem.
30
00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:05,399
I'm the engineer!
31
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,067
Like hell, you are.
It's my train.
32
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:10,138
It's my train!
Hey!
33
00:01:14,275 --> 00:01:16,744
* making you way
In the world today *
34
00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:19,713
* takes everything you've got *
35
00:01:19,713 --> 00:01:22,550
* taking a break
From all your worries *
36
00:01:22,550 --> 00:01:25,819
*sure would help a lot *
37
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:29,357
* wouldn't you like
To get away? *
38
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,561
* sometimes
You want to go *
39
00:01:33,561 --> 00:01:39,267
* where everybody
Knows your name *
40
00:01:39,267 --> 00:01:43,637
* and they're always
Glad you came *
41
00:01:43,637 --> 00:01:46,274
* you want to be
Where you can see *
42
00:01:46,274 --> 00:01:48,942
* our troubles
Are all the same *
43
00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:50,378
* you want to be *
44
00:01:50,378 --> 00:01:54,248
* where everybody
Knows your name *
45
00:01:54,248 --> 00:01:56,884
* you want to go
Where people know *
46
00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:59,353
* people are all the same *
47
00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:03,791
* you want to go where everybody
Knows your name *
48
00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,609
Sam, give me a double.
49
00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:24,111
Carla: a little early
For that, huh, doc?
50
00:02:24,111 --> 00:02:25,313
Maybe you're right.
51
00:02:25,313 --> 00:02:27,481
Cancel that double.
Make it a single.
52
00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,684
Oh, skip it altogether.
53
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:32,753
On second thought,
Make it a single--
54
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,788
Little extra in it.
55
00:02:36,190 --> 00:02:38,025
Frasier,
What's your order?
56
00:02:38,025 --> 00:02:39,460
Cup of coffee.
57
00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:43,364
You got troubles?
58
00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:46,234
I've just been invited
To deliver a paper
59
00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:47,901
At the state psychiatric
Convention this week,
60
00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:50,471
And I've got a first-class
Case of the jitters.
61
00:02:50,471 --> 00:02:55,576
Carla: I have a surefire way
Of keeping yourself calm.
62
00:02:55,576 --> 00:02:57,711
Picture
Your audience naked.
63
00:02:57,711 --> 00:03:00,548
Oh, thank you, carla,
For that old chestnut
From speech 101.
64
00:03:00,548 --> 00:03:04,285
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
I got a twist on it.
65
00:03:04,285 --> 00:03:07,087
Picture them naked
And wearing black socks.
66
00:03:07,087 --> 00:03:08,322
Oh, carla,
That's ridiculous.
67
00:03:08,322 --> 00:03:11,925
I can't see that
That would...
68
00:03:11,925 --> 00:03:14,962
See? I told you.
It works.
69
00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:16,964
Ok. Now try this angle.
70
00:03:16,964 --> 00:03:19,733
Ha ha ha!
71
00:03:19,733 --> 00:03:21,735
Now shut up.
72
00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:23,136
Sorry.
73
00:03:23,136 --> 00:03:24,405
I do see
Your point, though.
74
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:25,573
That could do
Just the trick.
75
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:27,341
Thank you, carla.
Sure.
76
00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:29,109
Oh, here comes
A likely candidate.
77
00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:30,611
Try it out on her.
78
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:34,282
Hello, dr. Crane.
Miss howe.
79
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,657
Doesn't work
With everyone.
80
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:48,796
Miss howe,
I have a message for you.
81
00:03:48,796 --> 00:03:51,299
"Mr. Sheridan is having
Lunch up in melville's,
82
00:03:51,299 --> 00:03:54,101
And he's gonna be
Coming down to talk to you
When he's through."
83
00:03:54,101 --> 00:03:55,603
Oh, great. Sheridan.
84
00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:57,237
Another one of the legions
Of presidents, vice presidents,
85
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,307
And consultants
This corporation
86
00:03:59,307 --> 00:04:00,774
Belches forth
Every five minutes.
87
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,776
Boy, seems like you
Have to be a real loser
88
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:06,580
Not to be at least
A vice president
In that company, doesn't it?
89
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,284
I'm sorry.
90
00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:14,488
He is undoubtedly here
To ask me some humiliating,
91
00:04:14,488 --> 00:04:16,123
Menial favor that he
Couldn't palm off
92
00:04:16,123 --> 00:04:18,292
On some other flunkey.
93
00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:20,193
Today, I draw the line.
94
00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:22,095
Today, this gal
Is going to shoot down
95
00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:23,664
Her first
Corporate bigwig.
96
00:04:23,664 --> 00:04:24,832
Oh, please.
97
00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:27,067
The first time you
Try to stand up
To this guy,
98
00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:29,670
You're going to
Crumble like a bag
Of potato chips.
99
00:04:29,670 --> 00:04:31,772
Oh, yeah,
Mr. Smart guy?
Yeah.
100
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,841
Watch me.
I'm watching you.
101
00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:35,976
Oh, miss howe.
102
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:37,210
Mr. Sheridan.
103
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:38,712
I'd like
To ask you a favor.
104
00:04:38,712 --> 00:04:40,113
I see.
105
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,683
I'm going to new york
On a business trip
For a few days,
106
00:04:42,683 --> 00:04:45,953
And I'd like you
To take care of my dog
While I'm away.
107
00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:49,590
Well, I'm sorry,
Mr. Sheridan,
108
00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:51,224
But I have plans
For the entire week,
109
00:04:51,224 --> 00:04:52,360
And I could not
Possibly break them.
110
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:53,727
I hope
You understand.
111
00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:56,196
That's fine. I realize
This is short notice.
112
00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:58,366
Thanks anyway.
113
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,638
Uh...My plans
Could be changed!
114
00:05:06,206 --> 00:05:08,108
Please, sir, let me
Do this for you.
115
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:11,912
Well, if it you don't
Think it would be any trouble,
116
00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:13,146
Thank you, miss howe.
117
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,281
Rebecca:
Oh, no, sir.
118
00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:15,383
Thank you
For the opportunity
119
00:05:15,383 --> 00:05:17,551
Of knowing your dog.
120
00:05:20,488 --> 00:05:23,323
God, I make myself sick.
121
00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:39,507
Ha ha ha!
122
00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:44,445
Ha ha ha!
123
00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:46,113
What'll it be,
Dr. Crane?
124
00:05:46,113 --> 00:05:49,082
The usual.
125
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,485
What's so funny?
126
00:05:51,485 --> 00:05:53,421
Ha ha ha!
127
00:05:53,421 --> 00:05:55,122
Ha ha ha!
128
00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:56,457
Ha ha!
129
00:05:56,457 --> 00:05:59,660
Ha ha ha!
130
00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:00,994
What's so funny?
131
00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:03,831
Ha ha!
It's a private joke, sam.
132
00:06:08,802 --> 00:06:10,504
Sam: hey there,
Rebecca.
133
00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,906
How do you
Like living with
Sheridan's pooch?
134
00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:16,276
Sir broundwin the gallant
From fairhaven manor,
135
00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:18,479
Better known
As buster, is fine.
136
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:20,814
I, on the other hand,
Am a nervous wreck.
137
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:22,282
What's the matter,
Rebecca?
138
00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:24,885
I knew I was going
To have to take care
Of the dog,
139
00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:26,319
But I didn't
Know it was going to be
140
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,622
In a place that was huge
And kind of like a mausoleum,
141
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:30,558
And it's stuck way out
In the middle of the moors.
142
00:06:30,558 --> 00:06:33,461
There are no moors
In massachusetts.
143
00:06:33,461 --> 00:06:35,829
I think they had them
Flown in or something.
144
00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:39,467
The point is, this place
Is big and scary,
145
00:06:39,467 --> 00:06:41,168
And I really hate it,
146
00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:43,003
Oh, and to make matters
Even worse, last night,
147
00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:44,638
The only thing
I could get on television
148
00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:47,407
Was this movie about this
Young, beautiful,
149
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,709
Dark-haired woman
150
00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:51,545
That was all alone
In this deserted house.
151
00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:54,515
What about where that
Guy cuts her head off?
152
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:56,383
Woody, please.
153
00:06:56,383 --> 00:07:00,153
There's no way her head
Is going to come off
In one clean cut like that.
154
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:04,024
Believe me, I've seen
My uncle butcher hogs,
155
00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:06,827
And you have to hack
And hack and hack...
156
00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:11,198
And when
The gardener got it--
157
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:12,900
Woody, that's enough.
158
00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:17,004
Oh, right.
Don't spoil the ending
For everybody else,
159
00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:19,439
But when you see it,
Take my advice
160
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,308
And turn away when you hear
Rmmm-rmmm-rmmm.
161
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:23,043
Woody!
Rmmm-rmmm-rmmm.
162
00:07:23,043 --> 00:07:27,180
Woody, I am just
A tiny bit on edge.
163
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:28,949
Oh. Sorry, miss howe.
164
00:07:30,350 --> 00:07:33,053
[blender whirs]
165
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,022
Damn it, woody!
166
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:43,531
Some bar manager--
Afraid of a blender.
167
00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:46,366
Let me see here.
168
00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:49,603
Rebecca howe,
All alone and scared
169
00:07:49,603 --> 00:07:51,872
In a big old house.
170
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:56,810
Sounds to me like
A job for sammy's
Security company.
171
00:07:56,810 --> 00:08:00,848
We get in
Before the burglars do.
172
00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:03,316
That's what
I like about you, sam.
173
00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:05,719
Your pants
Are always thinking.
174
00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:09,590
Frasier, darling.
175
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,725
Hello there,
Peanut butter cup.
176
00:08:11,725 --> 00:08:12,860
You're late for lunch.
177
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,094
Yes. I know.
I'm sorry.
178
00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:15,563
I'm sure you have
A very good excuse.
179
00:08:15,563 --> 00:08:16,897
Well, actually I do.
180
00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:18,699
I started having lunch
In another restaurant,
181
00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:21,068
Then remembered
We had a date.
182
00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,836
Well, would you like
To watch me eat?
183
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:25,238
I wouldn't miss it.
184
00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:29,743
Ha ha ha!
185
00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:32,379
What's so funny?
186
00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:33,947
It's nothing, really,
187
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,716
Just this
Relaxation exercise
I've been doing.
188
00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:38,686
I've been imagining
People naked and wearing
Black socks, you see,
189
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:40,821
To relieve my anxiety
Over my speech.
190
00:08:40,821 --> 00:08:41,989
Frankly, it's
Worked miracles.
191
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:43,156
I've been
Doing it all week.
192
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:44,391
Haven't even
Thought about it once.
193
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,927
When do you
Present that?
194
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,896
My god.
195
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:06,847
[rustling]
196
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:09,783
Buster,
Did you hear that?
197
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:15,088
Calm down.
198
00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:17,057
It probably
Wasn't anything.
199
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:21,094
It was probably just a tree
Branch against the window...
200
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:23,030
Or leatherface.
201
00:09:24,531 --> 00:09:26,734
Oh, god. Oh, god.
202
00:09:26,734 --> 00:09:28,168
[knock knock]
203
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:31,038
Oh, god, buster,
He's at the front door.
204
00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:32,640
[whimpers]
205
00:09:33,941 --> 00:09:35,743
Good dog.
206
00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:59,299
Thank you.
You're welcome.
207
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:01,669
Aah!
208
00:10:01,669 --> 00:10:04,504
How in the hell
Did you get in here?
209
00:10:04,504 --> 00:10:05,806
You left
The back door open.
210
00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:08,709
I just followed some guy
Carrying a meat hook.
211
00:10:09,843 --> 00:10:11,144
That is real funny, sam.
212
00:10:11,144 --> 00:10:12,813
You almost gave me
A heart attack.
213
00:10:12,813 --> 00:10:15,115
I'm sorry. It's all right.
I'm here now.
214
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,017
It wasn't funny.
I'm sorry.
215
00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:20,954
I have to admit,
I'm glad you are here.
216
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,123
When the lights went out
And the storm came,
217
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,225
I started getting
Scared to death.
218
00:10:25,225 --> 00:10:28,962
What happened
To that $10,000
Champion watchdog?
219
00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:31,598
He's hiding
In the kitchen.
220
00:10:31,598 --> 00:10:33,000
Oh, god, I can't
Seem to calm down!
221
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,635
My heart is just
Beating so fast!
222
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:38,605
Oh, yes, it is.
223
00:10:38,605 --> 00:10:43,143
Sam, get your hand
Away from that.
224
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,212
I was doing pretty good
Till the lights went out.
225
00:10:45,212 --> 00:10:47,147
Then this house really
Started giving me the creeps.
226
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,682
Oh. Well, hey,
Don't worry.
227
00:10:48,682 --> 00:10:50,083
I got some candles here.
228
00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:52,953
You brought
Your own candles?
Well, yeah.
229
00:10:52,953 --> 00:10:56,456
This kind of thing
Happens in big old
Spooky houses a lot.
230
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:57,925
I like
To be prepared.
231
00:10:57,925 --> 00:11:01,061
Sammy carries
Whatever he needs.
232
00:11:02,395 --> 00:11:04,597
Sam, did you
Come out here
233
00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:06,734
Because you were
Concerned I was scared,
234
00:11:06,734 --> 00:11:08,902
Or did you come out here
To get me in the sack?
235
00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:11,171
Hey, I came
Out here because
I was concerned
236
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:15,142
And scared
That I'd never
Get you in the sack.
237
00:11:15,142 --> 00:11:17,911
Kidding. I'm kidding.
My goodness.
238
00:11:17,911 --> 00:11:19,747
Sam, I really am
Glad you're here.
239
00:11:19,747 --> 00:11:20,981
It makes me feel
A lot better,
240
00:11:20,981 --> 00:11:23,250
But a man and
A woman can
Be together
241
00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:24,584
In an evening
Without ending up
242
00:11:24,584 --> 00:11:26,653
Rolling
On the floor.
243
00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:27,988
I know that's true
Of some people,
244
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:31,158
But, sweetheart,
We're good-looking.
245
00:11:31,158 --> 00:11:33,160
Sam...
What?
246
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:36,296
Sit down here a minute.
I want to tell you something.
247
00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:38,098
Ok.
248
00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:40,500
Now, believe this
Or not,
249
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:42,770
Even good-looking people
250
00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:44,504
Can spend
An evening together
251
00:11:44,504 --> 00:11:46,039
Without having sex.
252
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,911
Have you ever
Heard of conversation?
253
00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:53,313
Yeah, I've heard
Of conversation.
254
00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:55,682
Contrary to what
A lot of people think,
255
00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:57,417
I'm not that dumb.
256
00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:58,786
Here. Come on. Try me.
257
00:11:58,786 --> 00:12:00,453
Sit down.
Let's conversate.
258
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,227
Ok. So what do you
Want to talk about?
259
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:08,929
Sex.
260
00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:13,600
Sex is obviously
The only thing on your mind.
261
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:15,535
So forget it.
I'm going to bed.
262
00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:18,405
Oh, that's good
With me.
263
00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:19,572
I am going to bed alone.
264
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,275
If you want to stay here,
You sleep on the couch.
265
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,945
Come on. I can sleep on
A couch at my place.
266
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:26,679
Fine. Go sleep
On your couch.
267
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:29,282
All right, if that's
What you want.
268
00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:33,220
I'll leave you all alone
In this big old
Scary house.
269
00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:34,321
Whoo!
270
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,524
I'm moving the table.
271
00:12:37,524 --> 00:12:38,926
Don't pull a muscle.
272
00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:41,829
I'm serious.
I'm moving the chair.
273
00:12:41,829 --> 00:12:43,964
You're breaking
My heart.
274
00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:46,800
I got my hand
On the doorknob.
275
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:48,668
I'm opening the door.
276
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:49,937
Sam, don't!
277
00:12:49,937 --> 00:12:52,472
I knew it. Pajama time.
278
00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:53,807
Not you. The dog!
279
00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:56,076
What?
Buster! Buster!
280
00:12:56,076 --> 00:13:00,513
Whew! Boy, can
That sucker haul.
281
00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:01,748
He's gone.
282
00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:03,150
Well, hey, don't
Worry about it.
283
00:13:03,150 --> 00:13:04,918
He's a hardy breed.
284
00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:06,686
Speaking of breeding,
Let's--
285
00:13:06,686 --> 00:13:08,221
Are you crazy?
286
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:10,323
That is a champion dog,
And I'm responsible
For him.
287
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,692
If it takes all night,
I'm gonna find that mutt.
288
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:15,829
No. Don't--jeez.
Buster!
289
00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:20,167
Oh, hell.
290
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:23,503
Oh, might as well turn
The electricity back on.
291
00:13:34,681 --> 00:13:37,851
So, please, if you find him,
You've got this number.
292
00:13:37,851 --> 00:13:39,586
Ok. Thank you. Bye-bye.
293
00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:41,121
[doorbell rings]
294
00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:44,057
Please, please, please
Let it be somebody
That found him..
295
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:45,926
Did anybody
Find the dog?
296
00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:47,460
Listen, little lady.
297
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:48,528
We're not looking
298
00:13:48,528 --> 00:13:50,230
For aunt fanny's
Amethyst pendant here.
299
00:13:50,230 --> 00:13:51,865
This is a highly
Organized search party.
300
00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:54,234
We're going to conduct
This debriefing
By the numbers.
301
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:57,704
All right.
Alpha sector, report.
302
00:13:57,704 --> 00:13:58,738
Negative.
303
00:13:58,738 --> 00:13:59,907
Bravo sector.
Negative.
304
00:13:59,907 --> 00:14:02,910
Charlie sector.
Shut up, cliff.
305
00:14:02,910 --> 00:14:05,278
[telephone rings]
306
00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,714
Hello.
Yes, mr. Sheridan?
307
00:14:07,714 --> 00:14:10,517
Wow, you know, norm,
I can't get over this place.
308
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,852
I think I'll do
Something like this
With my living room.
309
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,121
What are you
Talking about?
310
00:14:14,121 --> 00:14:15,688
You live in 28
Square feet,
311
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:18,858
And your bed folds
Out of a couch.
312
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,727
You're going to what?
313
00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:22,762
All right, sir.
Bye-bye.
314
00:14:22,762 --> 00:14:26,499
Oh, god, he came home early.
He's on his way home
From the airport.
315
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:27,901
Al right, men.
316
00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:29,069
I suggest
We fall back
317
00:14:29,069 --> 00:14:30,103
To our
Original positions.
318
00:14:30,103 --> 00:14:31,304
What are you
Talking about?
319
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:34,074
To the bar!
Back to the bar!
320
00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:36,309
Yes, sir!
Right away, sir!
321
00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:45,118
Well, I guess
I deserve this.
322
00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:50,723
I'm always
Doing stupid favors
For everybody.
323
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:54,061
Guess it finally
Caught up with me.
324
00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:57,197
No, no. Don't
Do that, please.
325
00:14:57,197 --> 00:15:00,600
I hate it
When you cry.
326
00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,669
All right. All right.
Look. Wait, wait, wait.
327
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:04,137
Come on. Listen.
328
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:05,973
I'll tell sheridan
It was all my fault,
All right?
329
00:15:05,973 --> 00:15:08,708
Fine. Wait up, guys!
330
00:15:08,708 --> 00:15:10,243
That's great.
Really nice.
331
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:13,180
Oh, god!
What is it?
332
00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:15,715
A car. It's sheridan.
We're doomed.
333
00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:18,551
[doorbell rings]
334
00:15:18,551 --> 00:15:19,919
Uh...
335
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,055
Woody!
You found him!
336
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:24,324
Oh, god! I don't know
Who to kiss first.
337
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:26,994
I just had
A breath mint.
338
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:33,166
Hey, man.
Way to go.
339
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:34,901
Where did you
Find him?
340
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,769
At an auto
Wrecking yard.
341
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,471
What were you
Doing there?
342
00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:40,340
Just browsing.
343
00:15:41,908 --> 00:15:44,877
Oh, buster, buster.
Good old buster.
344
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:46,980
Oh, no.
That's not buster.
That's satan.
345
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:48,448
What?
Who?
346
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:50,550
I was brushing the snow
Off of the hubcaps,
347
00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:52,719
And I saw satan here
Chewing through a tire,
348
00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:56,456
And I thought, "He looks just
Like that picture of buster."
349
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:57,557
So I borrowed him
350
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:58,992
In case we don't find
The other dog.
351
00:15:58,992 --> 00:16:00,994
Woody, take him
To the kitchen.
352
00:16:00,994 --> 00:16:02,895
I only hope we can
Fool sheridan
353
00:16:02,895 --> 00:16:04,364
With this fleabag.
354
00:16:04,364 --> 00:16:06,233
He's no fleabag,
Miss howe.
355
00:16:06,233 --> 00:16:07,900
He's a trained
Attack dog.
356
00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:11,238
Come on,
Sweetheart.
357
00:16:11,238 --> 00:16:14,674
An attack dog?
He brings an attack dog
Into this house?
358
00:16:14,674 --> 00:16:16,576
Come on. His heart's
In the right place.
359
00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:17,977
Hello.
360
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,313
Oh, god!
You found him?
361
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,115
Oh, that's wonderful!
362
00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:24,584
Yeah. Give me
Your address.
363
00:16:24,584 --> 00:16:25,985
Uh-huh.
364
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,321
Ok, I'll come
And get him right now.
365
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:30,223
A neighbor at the end
Of the road found him.
366
00:16:30,223 --> 00:16:31,658
Here's the address.
You go get him.
367
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:32,592
I'm on my way.
368
00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:35,295
Woody, bring satan
Out here, please.
369
00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:37,297
Woody,
We found buster.
370
00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:39,166
You can take satan
Back to the junkyard.
371
00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:41,534
Miss howe,
He hadn't finished
His snack yet.
372
00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:44,037
I gave him something
Out of the refrigerator.
373
00:16:44,037 --> 00:16:45,738
Actually, he opened
The door and took it,
374
00:16:45,738 --> 00:16:47,640
But I got
Out of the way.
375
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:50,377
Woody, whatever.
Just take him out of here.
376
00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:53,080
Go, go. Hurry.
Hurry, hurry, hurry.
377
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,614
Sheridan is here.
He just drove up.
378
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:55,848
Woody, cancel that.
379
00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:59,119
Sam, you go around back way
And get buster, all right?
380
00:16:59,119 --> 00:17:01,888
Woody, you take satan
Into the kitchen
And get him some kibble.
381
00:17:01,888 --> 00:17:04,724
We hope that sam gets
Back in time with buster
So we don't have to use him,
382
00:17:04,724 --> 00:17:06,759
But if he doesn't,
Get back in time with buster,
383
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:09,429
Then we have to convince
Sheridan that satan
Is buster until sam gets back
384
00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:11,030
And we can switch
Buster for satan,
385
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:13,166
Or I can just put
Steak sauce on my throat
386
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:16,436
And let satan chow down.
387
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:19,139
I understand everything
Perfectly, miss howe.
388
00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:20,873
Come on, sam.
Let's get your kibble.
389
00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:23,510
Ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
390
00:17:23,510 --> 00:17:25,378
I was just kidding,
Miss howe.
391
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:31,017
[door opens]
392
00:17:31,017 --> 00:17:33,052
Oh...
393
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,921
I'm back.
394
00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:37,090
Where's my big boy?
395
00:17:37,090 --> 00:17:38,791
Where's my buster?
396
00:17:38,791 --> 00:17:40,460
What, no hello?
No description
Of the trip?
397
00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:41,528
No slides?
398
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:44,731
I finished early, so I
Caught a late flight.
399
00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:45,565
[whistles]
400
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,867
Here, boy!
Where are you, boy?
401
00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:50,437
Here, buster!
He is, um...
402
00:17:50,437 --> 00:17:52,472
He's sleeping
In the kitchen.
That's right.
403
00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:55,475
Miss howe,
Who's this man?
404
00:17:55,475 --> 00:17:57,444
This man?
He's woody.
405
00:17:57,444 --> 00:18:00,113
He's my boyfriend.
406
00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:02,515
Wow, miss howe.
407
00:18:04,317 --> 00:18:07,654
Your boyfriend
Calls you miss howe?
408
00:18:07,654 --> 00:18:11,324
I was his teacher.
409
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,494
I got real lonely,
And I thought
410
00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:15,495
I'd call him over here
For company.
411
00:18:15,495 --> 00:18:16,796
I hope you don't mind.
412
00:18:16,796 --> 00:18:19,932
No, of course not.
Listen. I'm very tired.
413
00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:22,869
I just want to say
Hi to my dog
And then go to bed.
414
00:18:22,869 --> 00:18:24,337
So, if you
Don't mind...
415
00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:26,906
You want us
To leave?
416
00:18:26,906 --> 00:18:29,776
He wants us
To leave, woody.
417
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:31,578
Great! How about
A burger and a movie?
418
00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:34,581
Then we can go
Someplace and park.
419
00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:36,316
Later!
420
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:38,385
First, I'd
Like stand here
421
00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:39,919
And have a little chat
With mr. Sheridan
422
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:40,953
About his trip.
423
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,555
Not now.
I want to see buster.
424
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:44,090
No! Mr. Sheridan!
Yes, miss howe.
425
00:18:44,090 --> 00:18:45,525
Come on, buster!
Let's wrestle.
426
00:18:45,525 --> 00:18:47,260
Woody, we can't
Let him do this.
427
00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:48,995
Don't worry, miss howe.
428
00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:51,231
He won't attack unless
He hears the command word--
Cochise...
429
00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:52,432
Cochise?
430
00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:54,100
Well, he's never
Going to say that.
431
00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:56,068
Or unless
He provokes him.
432
00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:58,371
[grr]
433
00:18:58,371 --> 00:19:00,473
Take that,
Big boy.
434
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:04,244
I got your tail.
I got your tail!
435
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:06,746
Hey, it worked.
He thinks that's his dog.
436
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:10,217
You're right.
If he lives,
We fooled him.
437
00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:11,884
Sammy
To the rescue.
438
00:19:11,884 --> 00:19:14,221
Sam, get that
Mutt out of here!
What?
439
00:19:14,221 --> 00:19:16,055
Sheridan's
In the kitchen
With satan.
440
00:19:16,055 --> 00:19:19,091
This is no time
For folk singing.
441
00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:21,528
Oh! Oh! Oh!
What are we going to do?
442
00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:23,396
All right.
Go out the front.
443
00:19:23,396 --> 00:19:24,731
Sneak around the back.
444
00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:26,499
I'll try to divert
Sheridan's attention
445
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:27,667
While you make
The switch,
446
00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:29,402
But remember,
They look exactly alike.
447
00:19:29,402 --> 00:19:32,004
All right.
Come on, boy. Come on.
448
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,441
Boy,
Buster is frisky.
449
00:19:34,441 --> 00:19:36,676
I was playing
"Get my thumb",
450
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:40,079
And he was practically
Bouncing off the ceiling.
451
00:19:40,079 --> 00:19:41,914
Well,
I bet he was
Just so glad
452
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:43,316
To have
You back.
453
00:19:43,316 --> 00:19:44,551
Yeah. Well, I'm going to
Feed him now, miss howe.
454
00:19:44,551 --> 00:19:46,185
No. I already
Fed him.
455
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:47,720
We ordered out.
Chinese.
456
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:48,888
[woof woof]
457
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:50,757
[grr]
[woof]
458
00:19:50,757 --> 00:19:52,725
That sounds like
Two dogs in there.
459
00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:54,461
Mr. Sheridan,
There's something
460
00:19:54,461 --> 00:19:56,296
I've been wanting
To ask you.
461
00:19:56,296 --> 00:19:59,432
Is this
A bowling trophy?
462
00:19:59,432 --> 00:20:02,735
No, it's my...
Late wife's ashes.
463
00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:05,372
Well, she was
A good-sized woman.
464
00:20:05,372 --> 00:20:08,275
Excuse me.
I want to see to buster.
465
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:12,645
Mission
Accomplished.
466
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:14,914
I made the switch.
Satan is in the car.
467
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:15,882
Oh, good.
468
00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:18,285
Well, there was
Only buster in there.
469
00:20:18,285 --> 00:20:21,087
Good! Well, I'll
Be going. Bye-bye.
470
00:20:21,087 --> 00:20:23,923
Good night.
Miss howe!
471
00:20:23,923 --> 00:20:25,224
Who's that man?
472
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,893
I'm her boyfriend.
473
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,961
That's right!
He's my boyfriend.
474
00:20:28,961 --> 00:20:31,764
Miss howe,
We have to talk.
475
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:39,439
Look at him.
476
00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:41,240
You're not so tough
When you're not running loose,
Are you?
477
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,611
Ha ha ha!
Bbll-bll-bll-bll.
478
00:20:46,446 --> 00:20:48,948
I wouldn't do that,
If I were you, cliff.
479
00:20:48,948 --> 00:20:50,182
If you look
Very closely,
480
00:20:50,182 --> 00:20:52,084
You'll see
He has several tiny
Little mail bags
481
00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:54,321
Notched
On his leash.
482
00:20:54,321 --> 00:20:57,624
Yeah. Oh, yeah,
I'm real scared, norm.
483
00:20:57,624 --> 00:21:01,961
Heh. Look at me shake.
Bbll-bll-bll-bll.
484
00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:06,232
Woody, I thought you
Were going to return
485
00:21:06,232 --> 00:21:07,700
The hound from hell.
486
00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:09,669
Oh, the guy is
Coming for him tomorrow,
487
00:21:09,669 --> 00:21:11,404
Unless, of course,
You'd like to reconsider
488
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:12,872
And keep him
As our mascot.
489
00:21:12,872 --> 00:21:14,607
That's exactly what
This bar needs--
490
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:15,908
A loaded weapon
That goes off
491
00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:19,011
When you say the word
C-o-c-h-I-s-e.
492
00:21:19,011 --> 00:21:23,616
Great!
I spelled it right.
493
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:26,252
Frasier: greetings, all.
Sam: hey, doc.
494
00:21:26,252 --> 00:21:29,656
Well, there's
A sturdy fellow.
495
00:21:29,656 --> 00:21:31,858
Hello, boy.
How are you?
496
00:21:31,858 --> 00:21:33,560
What's this?
497
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:36,429
"Don't say cochise
To this dog."
498
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:42,201
Woody,
He didn't attack.
499
00:21:42,201 --> 00:21:43,703
No. He didn't.
500
00:21:43,703 --> 00:21:46,038
Maybe he didn't hear
The attack word.
501
00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:47,940
Frasier...
502
00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:50,009
Cochise!
503
00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:57,016
Cochise.
Cochise, cochise!
504
00:21:57,016 --> 00:21:58,385
Rebecca:
This is buster!
505
00:21:58,385 --> 00:21:59,819
I thought you were
Going to make the switch.
506
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:02,021
I did, but they were
Tearing at each other,
507
00:22:02,021 --> 00:22:03,155
And it got confusing.
508
00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:04,357
I was trying
To separate them
509
00:22:04,357 --> 00:22:06,593
And protect my goodies
At the same time.
510
00:22:08,528 --> 00:22:11,364
Hey, if this
Isn't satan,
Then satan is--
511
00:22:11,364 --> 00:22:13,733
Chewing the spleen
Out of mr. Sheridan.
512
00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:16,436
All right.
Sam, hand me the phone.
513
00:22:16,436 --> 00:22:18,070
Woody, come around here
And untie buster.
514
00:22:18,070 --> 00:22:20,540
I've got to call mr. Sheridan
And warn him.
515
00:22:20,540 --> 00:22:22,609
We've got to make
Another switch.
516
00:22:22,609 --> 00:22:25,712
Hello.
This is rebecca howe.
517
00:22:25,712 --> 00:22:28,481
Yes. I need to speak
To mr. Sheridan, please.
518
00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:30,216
I don't care
If he's asleep!
519
00:22:30,216 --> 00:22:32,419
Wake him up.
This is an emergency.
520
00:22:32,419 --> 00:22:33,620
Well, all right.
Would you--
521
00:22:33,620 --> 00:22:35,522
Please just go upstairs
And tell the man
522
00:22:35,522 --> 00:22:38,090
Not to say the word "Cochise"
Around his dog.
523
00:22:38,090 --> 00:22:40,493
Wait...
I just remembered.
524
00:22:40,493 --> 00:22:42,294
The attack word
Isn't cochise.
525
00:22:42,294 --> 00:22:43,663
It's that other
Indian name.
526
00:22:43,663 --> 00:22:45,297
Oh, woody, what
Other indian name?
527
00:22:45,297 --> 00:22:47,700
There are a million
Other indian names,
My friend.
528
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:49,168
There's crazy horse,
Sitting bull,
529
00:22:49,168 --> 00:22:50,336
Pocahontas,
Geronimo--
530
00:22:50,336 --> 00:22:52,672
[woof woof]
531
00:22:52,672 --> 00:22:54,474
Woody: that's it!
532
00:22:54,474 --> 00:22:56,976
Cliff:
Go on! Go on!
533
00:22:56,976 --> 00:22:58,445
[woof woof woof]
534
00:22:58,445 --> 00:23:01,848
Hey, he's got
Mr. Clavin trapped
In the men's room.
535
00:23:01,848 --> 00:23:05,184
That's ok.
We can use the one
Up at melville's.
536
00:23:05,184 --> 00:23:06,586
Oh, hey, it's ok.
537
00:23:06,586 --> 00:23:08,888
I got the number
Of that guy
538
00:23:08,888 --> 00:23:10,690
From the auto
Wrecking yard.
539
00:23:10,690 --> 00:23:12,391
I can call him and get
The counter-command.
540
00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:13,392
I'll do it.
541
00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:15,728
Oh, hello,
Mr. Sheridan.
542
00:23:15,728 --> 00:23:18,465
Sorry, I have
The wrong number.
543
00:23:18,465 --> 00:23:20,933
Hello. Hey, I'm calling
For woody.
544
00:23:20,933 --> 00:23:22,702
We need the counter-command
For satan.
545
00:23:22,702 --> 00:23:25,104
Scram, you beast
From hell!
546
00:23:25,104 --> 00:23:26,706
Ok, thanks.
547
00:23:26,706 --> 00:23:28,174
Did you get it?
Yeah.
548
00:23:28,174 --> 00:23:29,341
Well, what is it?
549
00:23:29,341 --> 00:23:31,511
Oh,
Go on!
550
00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:34,080
Good night, everyone!
551
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,247
[woof woof]
552
00:23:35,247 --> 00:23:38,485
Good night,
Everyone! Satan!
553
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:42,489
Good night,
Everyone!
554
00:23:42,489 --> 00:23:44,223
Doesn't work!
555
00:23:44,223 --> 00:23:46,125
[woof woof woof]
39422
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