All language subtitles for House.S02E17.BDRip.x265-ION265

Narrator:
The human heart is a giant muscle

squeezing or contracting
over 60 times each minute.

That's 3,600...

Walsh: At this point,
your blood is a deep purple

because it's just finished
dropping off oxygen

for all the parts of your body.

Come on, follow me.

Come on.

I have a question
and I need to go to the bathroom.

Which would you like to do first?

The question.

- Okay.
- Where's the bathroom?

Who knows where the bathroom is?

I do.

Go with Ian to the bathroom.

I don't have to go.

We're not at school,
nobody goes anywhere by themselves.

- Why?
- In case you get lost.

Orin case somebody kidnaps us.

If somebody kidnaps Ian,
they'll kidnap me, too.

I want to stay with the class.

Michael, go with Ian...

Do you need help?

I need you to find a grown-up.

Is the baby coming?

- Who should I take with me?
- You're fine.

Go to the front desk
or find a security guard.

I really have to pee.

Walsh: Oh, god.

Is the baby coming?
I don't know how to do this.

Are you okay, Ian?

Yeah. Sure.

I don't think you are.

You're bleeding.

Walsh: Help!

Help!

- $20.
- Call.

You'll call anything.

My stack is bigger than your stack.

You in or out?

You know that relative to their size,

gorillas have smaller testicles
than humans.

Well, then you'd probably have an edge
over a gorilla, but not over me.

Reason is, primate testes' size

inversely corresponds to the fidelity
of our females.

You think there might be a better time
to annoy me about my wife?

- I'm talking about poker.
- Right.

Women are evil,
you're right to drive them away.

Call, fold or raise.
Story time can wait.

We're smaller and better than chimps,

bigger and worse than gorillas.

For all our rationality,

our supposed trust and fealty
to a higher power,

our ability to create a system of rules
and laws,

our baser drives are more powerful
than any of that.

We want to control our emotions,
but we can't.

If we're happy, things don't annoy us.

If, on the other hand,
we're sitting on crappy hole cards,

little tiny things annoy us
a whole lot more.

I raise.

So, are you gonna tell me
an annoying story every time I raise?

God, that would be annoying.

I call.

Dr. Cuddy, I got one of your patients
in the er.

Ian alston, six-years-old.

Oh, I know him. What's the problem?
I'm all in.

Bloody diarrhea. Hemodynamically
stable,

but he's been developing some
coordination problems.

It sounds like gastroenteritis
and dehydration.

Order fluids and I'll take it
on my service.

Bet's to you, house.

- They scan his head?
- No, why would they scan...

Don't play games. You gonna call?

- How's the heart rate?
- Stable.

I'm sorry. House, it's gastroenteritis.
I'm not going anywhere.

Put the order in,

and have someone tell Alan and Sarah
that I'll be up when I'm done.

You in or out?

I'm out.

Stone cold bluff.

You might want to spend a little more
time paying attention to your cards

and a little less time staring
at my breasts.

They don't match either.

I'm gonna take some air.

Follow my finger with your eyes.

How much longer will Dr. Cuddy be?

Well, given the number of mojitos
she's knocking back at the party,

I'd say it's gonna be at least
three hours before she's even conscious.

Sarah: Weren't you at the same party?

I don't drink.

I want you to reach out
and grab my cane.

What's wrong?

Your son's brain is losing control
of his muscles.

Dr. Cuddy's message said it was just
dehydration from diarrhea.

She's wrong.

Is he gonna be all right?

I don't know.

So, were you in one of those cages?

No. No, no, no, no.
No, those are for tourists.

You were in the water
with the great white?

Sure, it's no big deal. You just have to
keep an eye on them.

If they get too close,
punch them in the nose.

Send them on their way.

I had you going.

You are mean.

Hey. How's that anal fissure?

Did it heal yet?
Or is it still draining?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't realize you'd come back
for seconds.

I figured that after that girl in the
staiwvell you'd be done for the night.

He's joking.

No Adam's apple, small hands.

It's no surprises this time.

I'll see you later.

Got a case.

Well, you could've just said that.

You didn't have to screw with me.

If I didn't screw with you,

you'd spent the whole night thinking
you might get laid,

which means you'd be useless.
Better to extinguish all hope.

Get foreman and Cameron and meet me
upstairs. Stat.

What's so urgent?

Two cases, same symptoms.

What do six-year-olds and 70-year-olds
have in common?

Their immune systems don't work as
well.

- Could be listeria.
- I already checked for that.

Leukemia has a higher prevalence
in both young and old.

- So does asthma.
- House: No, no, no.

Cameron: They can both get diabetes.

The nearly dead and the newly bred

have more in common with each other
than with people in the middle.

It's weird.
It's kind of a circle of life thing.

- This kid doesn't have kidney failure.
- He will.

Based on this file,
the kid just ate some bad food.

Was the old man...

They were nowhere near each other
in any of the four dimensions.

- This case is 12 years old.
- Yep.

And this case is cuddy's.

She assigned it to me.

She agrees with you that this is
something more than gastroenteritis?

She wouldn't have assigned it to me
if she didn't, would she?

What were we talking about?

Two patients with two symptoms
in common.

And five symptoms not in common.

While you were all wearing your
"Frankie says relax" t-shirts,

I was treating a 73-year-old woman

who went through this progression
of symptoms.

The last of which was...

And in case any of you missed that class
in med school,

that one's untreatable.

Kid's got the first two.

It took ester an hour and 20 minutes to
go from two to three.

And less than a day to make it
all the way to the rear exit.

This is all because a child
has some blood in his diarrhea?

He's got a tummy ache.

If there was any reason to think it was
anything worse,

cuddy would be all over it.

Great. Do a colonoscopy.

On a six-year-old kid who probably has
nothing worse than some food poisoning?

And if you happen to find any purple
papules,

do me a favor and grab a slice.

I wanna check for erdheim-Chester.

A disease that there have been, what,
maybe 200 reported cases of ever?

If ester's family had let me do
an autopsy, there'd be 201.

Foreman: See anything?

Chase: No, and I don't expect to.

House usually avoids cases.

If he's actually stealing a case
from cuddy, there's gotta be a reason.

It's not the first time I've seen
this file.

About a month before Cameron was
hired,

some trucker came in here
with these symptoms.

House decided he was dying.

Two days and a spinal tap,

bone marrow extraction,
and three colonoscopies later,

we send the guy home
with a bunch of painkillers

and a diagnosis
of a bad cheese sandwich.

One of the guys who worked here
before me

said house tried to cure ester
at least three other times.

You know how people see
the virgin Mary in danishes and stuff?

Someone died 12 years ago
and house doesn't know why.

House sees that case now
in paint peeling,

in clouds, and now in this poor kid.

Erdheim-Chester is an abnormal growth of
some of the cells that fight infection.

Is that cancer?
Cos he seems okay now.

The other doctor kind of scared us
about that.

He shouldn't have. We're just testing.
It'll probably be negative.

I don't understand.

You don't think that's what it is but
you want to do this thing to him anyway?

- We need to be sure.
- Isn't there any other way?

It shouldn't take long.

All right.

Those ridges look a lot like purple
papules.

They're not purple. They're red.
Probably just blood blisters.

Give me the biopsy needle.

- How long is this gonna take?
- Forget it, chase.

Your punching out the shark story's
good, but she's not waiting for you.

We couldn't confirm the source of
the bleeding,

but we did biopsy some...

- Blood blisters.
- You mean papules.

Come on, Cameron. Who's right?

Chase is. Negative for erdheim-Chester.

Let me see.

If it's not erdheim-Chester...

It's exactly what we said before,
a garden-variety viral gastroenteritis.

Can we go back to the party?

Do a kidney biopsy.

Ester's shut down in exactly...

Chase: This kid is not ester.

You screwed up. She died. I'm sorry.

But that does not mean this kid is dying
as well.

Jeez, you're testy when you don't get
any fuzz. Come on.

What'd the test say?

Colonoscopy was clean.

And the biopsy was negative for
erdheim-Chester.

So Ian's going to be all right?
It was just some sort of virus.

What's that?

Urine.

Yeah, but it's brown.

Ian's kidneys are shutting down.

Still think it's not the same case?

House: So, what can cause
bloody diarrhea,

ataxia and kidney failure?

- I'll go do a biopsy.
- Forget it!

That battle's over.

His rising creatinine is his kidneys'
way of saying,

"go on without me."

What explains everything?

E. Coli ho-157 causes bloody diarrhea

and leads to hemolytic-uremic
syndrome.

Toxins from the bacteria
cause his kidneys to shut down.

We should start him on plasmapheresis.

Clear, concise
and completely plausible.

And exactly what I did last time.
Didn't work.

- What else?
- Goodpasture's syndrome.

Circulating antibodies cause kidney
failure and bleeding.

But not the purple papules.

If you throw in ester's next symptom,

brain, makes me think
heavy metal toxicity.

His hematocrit would have to be low.
It's at 44,

and ester's never dropped below...

- 42.
- You have the file memorized?

It's my lucky number.

What about lymphoma?

Causes kidney failure, gi bleed, and can
infiltrate the base of the brain.

You check ester for that?

She never showed any signs of...

If he has lymphoma this far advanced,

we should be able to see it in his blood
and brain.

Chase, run a blood smear
and immunochemistries.

Foreman, get an mri.

- I'll page cuddy.
- No, you won't.

She thinks the kid has a stomachache.

Then she'll come right up here and do
one of two things.

If she agrees with me, I don't need her.
If she disagrees, I don't want her.

Can't handle people
disagreeing with you?

She might have a different take on this.

Subordinates can disagree with me
all they want. It's healthy.

People who can shut me down
on the other hand...

Forget cuddy.
I'll have Wilson keep her busy.

Keep your answers short and discreet.
Is cuddy still playing?

The chicken is still
in piccadilly square.

Brilliant. She'll never suspect that
normandy is our target.

Is that house?

Tell him that the blinds just went to
20-40 and he's running out of chips.

- How's she doing?
- What's going on?

The way you took off,
something's obviously...

Love to chat but got a game to play.
How's she doing?

The patient is on life support.
We're about to pull the plug.

Are you talking about me?

What've you got?

Those sounds like high-dose cardio
meds.

Two hearts.

You got the flush?

Still waiting on the final labs.

Is she drinking her seltzer?

No, hydration is not a problem.

She's bluffing. Push her all in.

Call.

Two pair. Show me your hearts.

Seven of clubs.

Oh, dear. Sounds like I messed up.

You're gonna be stuck with her
for a while.

Talk to you soon.

Cuddy: Oh, yes!

Why are you taking a picture
of his head?

We're looking for lymphoma, but...

So, it's not erdheim-something
and it's not his kidneys,

but his kidneys are failing.

Where's Dr. Cuddy?

Dr. House mentioned another case.

Is there another patient
with the same thing that Ian has?

- Not exactly.
- What does that mean?

Dr. House had a patient a while back

who exhibited the same symptoms
as your son.

- Then you know what's wrong?
- No.

So what do you know?

We know the likely course
the disease will take.

Which is?

She had multiple system failures
affecting...

What happened to her?

She died 24 hours after her admission.

Mr. or Mrs. Alston,
would you mind giving me a hand?

Foreman: He's having trouble
sitting still.

It's impossible to get the detail
we need.

So I figured he might feel
more comfortable hearing your voices.

Ian, honey.

Just sit still. They'll be done
in a moment. We're here with you.

I'm scared.

It's okay, honey. It's...

It's only a big camera. It's gonna take
a picture of your head.

You love it when I take your picture
at home, don't you?

Yeah.

And you have to hold still for that,
too, right?

But this isn't like that.

I know it's scary, Ian,
but you can do it.

You're getting to be so grown-up.

So just hold perfectly still,
just for a little bit.

Mommy, are you crying?

No. No, honey, I'm just tired.

Okay. |'|| try.

The base of his brain's been infiltrated
by a small mass. We think...

- Pituitary?
- Looks that way.

Explains the low blood pressure.

And pretty much confirms the lymphoma.

If we'd started ester on prednisone...

Did anyone see the lymphoma?

No, we saw a mass.
The location is consistent with...

Didn't see any in the blood either.

White blood cells show no spindling
or abnormal nuclei.

Nothing on immunochemistries either.
It's not lymphoma.

Foreman: House!

It's a train.

- We don't know what kind of train...
- Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

- I'm thirsty.
- It's closed.

It's not now.

We got one advantage.
We know where the tracks are going.

The fact that the end of the line
is death is an advantage?

The fact that we know is an advantage.

It means maybe we can get ahead of it.

Next station is the liver.

We got about 90 minutes
before it gets there.

Maybe we can cut down a tree
across the line just outside of town.

I'll do an ultrasound.

No, treatment will tell us more, faster.

How can we start treatment if we have
no idea what we're treating for?

Treat him for everything.

Give him acetylcysteine, and interferon,
and silymarin,

and whatever else you can think of
to protect the liver.

What's going on?

Oh, just catching up on some TV.
How're you doing?

Well, thanks to your last consult,
the patient has improved dramatically.

Tell house the patient is about
to kill the doctor.

- She says the patient...
- I heard.

- What've you got?
- Well, cuddy just raised and...

- You're paired.
- What?

Nines.

How do you know?

Anything lower,
you wouldn't sound so excited.

Jacks or higher,

your voice sounds like Debbie from
accounting is sitting in your lap.

Ask cuddy if she can beat
a pair of threes.

What's going on?
If you're gonna mess with me,

wouldn't it be more fun to do it
in person?

Yes, it would.

Can you beat a pair of threes?

What'd she do?

I left orders for p0 fluids, doctor.

Enough with the codes.
She obviously knows it's me.

She's drinking her seltzer.

Did she stop?

- Yes.
- Go all in.

- But...
- Just do it.

You couldn't care less about
this charity event.

You claim not to be messing with me.

You're either trying to keep me...

Shut up.

Look, last time I wanted the game
to go on. I still do.

It means that this time you get to win.

Hold on.

I fold.

House, are you sure you're okay?

Meds seem to be working.
Liver's holding its own.

Good.

- But the platelets are dropping.
- Even better.

Why? It means he's getting sicker.

It's new. New is good.

Because old ended in death.

I can't breathe.

Chase!

Sarah: What's happening?

Sarah: Ian, come on.

Honey, just relax.

Ian, breathe. Come on, honey. Please.

Please, honey.

Foreman: We had to put him
on a ventilator.

He's back on ester's path

and we managed to make the train skip
a few stations.

Which means that instead of 12 hours,
he's probably got less than two.

Which begs the question, why?
What did we do?

Acetylcysteine could mess
with the lungs.

Mess with them, not shut them down
in 20 minutes.

Interferon modulates the immune
system.

It could affect a cancer of the blood,
like one of the ieukemias.

It doesn't speed them up.
It slows them down.

It slows down all 500 of them?

Anybody know where we can find
an oncologist at this hour?

What effects would interferon have
on leukemia?

Depends on what type. Could make
it better. Could make it worse.

A four-year fellowship to learn that.

Cuddy: Tell house if he wants
to play cards,

he can get his ass back down here
and play.

You hear that.
She wants me off the phone.

Means she's vulnerable.
Go all in.

But the party's over
in less than three hours.

Cuddy: It's over in less than two hours,

which means you either have

three of a kind or just threes.

I'm guessing threes.

I bet $500.

- Go all in.
- You obviously want to bust me.

Why would you...

Either you go all in,

or I tell everybody in the building
that you wear toenail Polish.

I'm all in.

I'll call.

I'm betting you have a pair of threes,

but even if you have three,

it's not gonna beat trip nines.

Oh! Oh! Oh, no!

Oh, no! Oh! Oh, that's gotta hurt.

What happened?

I just killed two birds
with one straight.

Good bye.

Fine, keep playing. But I need you
to recommend a good oncologist

because if I don't get one up here
in the next few minutes,

I got a dead six-year-old.

If you need help, ask.
These games are insane.

The games have a higher success rate.

Well, I don't see anything that looks
like leukemia.

- You do a bone marrow biopsy?
- No time.

Even if there is an occult blood cancer,

you wouldn't expect interferon
to make it worse.

Certainly not this fast.

- House: What would move this fast?
- Cameron: Autoimmune diseases.

If his body's own defenses
are attacking him,

beefing them up is just gonna put
fuel on the fire.

Sarcoidosis could be in his brain and
lungs.

No. No enlarged hilar lymph nodes on his
chest X-ray.

The systemic nature suggests juvenile
rheumatoid arthritis.

Or kawasaki's disease.

Can't be kawasaki's.

That doesn't affect the elderly.

This is a kid's X-ray?

House had another patient.

Who may or may not have had
kawasaki's.

This kid on the other hand,

he makes antibodies that are eating
the inside of his arteries,

choking off blood to his major organs,
one by one.

First the gi tract, then the kidneys,
then the brain, now the lungs.

Can anyone think of a reason why
kawasaki's can't affect the elderly,

other than that it doesn't? Nice.

Foreman: We can confirm with blood
work.

We need an Ana, sed rate...

Labs will take two hours.

What was the old lady's sed rate?

House: Elevated, 98.

You can't use another patient's labs
to diagnosis kawasaki's disease.

Is that like a dare or something?

You don't have time to be wrong.

Fine. We'll look for kawasaki where he
lives,

Ian's coronary arteries.

This other patient,

the old lady, ester?

Have you read Moby dick?

It was a book?

- It was ten years ago.
- Twelve.

Obsession is dangerous.

Only if you're on a wooden ship,
and your obsession is a whale.

I think I'm in the clear.

You do realize it's a metaphor.

You realize the point of metaphors
is to scare people from doing things

by telling them that something much
scarier is gonna happen

than what will really happen.

God, I wish I had a metaphor
to explain that better.

Go back to the game. Don't worry,
I'm not gonna get eaten by witches.

Chase: Coronary arteries clear.
No aneurysms.

Flip the mode. Let's see the flow.

Sarah: How did that other woman die?

She went into respiratory distress.

- Her heart and liver were already...
- No.

Did she suffer?

Was she in pain?

I don't know.

Laminar flow. No blood clots,
no ragged edges.

Damn. Shut it down.
We're just wasting time.

Look at the right atrium.

- That's not kawasaki's.
- No.

Chase: It's small, but it's there.

Ester didn't have a mass in her heart.

Ian's younger.
He can take more of a pounding.

Ester died before the disease
reached her heart.

The disease made a mass
and made it fast.

- Could be bacteria.
- Muscle.

Connective tissue.

House: The kid can't take
any more theories.

Only thing we know is that
whatever that mass is,

that's what he's got.

We need a piece of it.
I'm doing a biopsy.

I'll shut the blinds.

No, let them watch.

I do my best work on the big stage.

Passing through the superior vena cava.

You're in the atrium. Pull back.

You've hit the wall of the heart.

These procedures would be
so much simpler

if you could do them on healthy people.

And out again.

- V-fib.
- Cardiac arrest.

Chase: Call a code.

Come on, paddles!

- Come on.
- Charge.

Clear!

Woman over P.A.:
Code blue, iso room.

Code blue, iso room.

And again.

- Nothing.
- Again.

You got a clock on this?

How much longer
you gonna keep doing this?

Clear.

Wait. I've got something.

He's back.

- What are you doing?
- I'm doing what we came here to do.

- It almost killed him.
- I know. I was right here.

I need a vacutainer.

His brain's been oxygen deprived
for over eight minutes.

There might be nothing left. He might...

Tell the parents.
Where the hell is that vacutainer?

- So, what's he got?
- Brain damage.

Good chance.
I was talking about before that.

- You're not worried about...
- Things I can't do anything about?

- I try not to.
- Yeah.

Things just roll off you
like water off a duck.

Histiocytosis.

Very unlikely in a 73-year-old.

Whatever this is, it's very unlikely.

Come on. More ideas. Let's go, people.

Genetic disorders could cause
masses everywhere. Tuberous sclerosis.

If it's genetic,
he's had it all his life.

- Why now?
- I don't know.

It sure fits nice enough.

We haven't ruled out leukemia yet.

Or sarcoma. He could have multiple soft
tissue tumors.

Foreman: Or sarcoidosis.

Multiple neurofibromatosis.

Foreman: Chondrocytomas.

How's it going? You win?

I got called away by the angry parents
of a patient.

There are three of you here.

None of you had the sense to stop him,
to pick up a phone and call me.

House: I told them you'd signed off.

The parents are mad
because their kid is dying.

It's understandable.

But if he doesn't die,
they won't be mad anymore.

If he's brain damaged,
they might still be a little ticked.

Had to do it to save him.

You had to do it to diagnose ester.

You may have killed a six-year-old

because you're obsessed with a woman
who's been dead for 12 years.

Sometimes you lose, house!
You're not god!

He's not dead yet.

No, but you're done with him.

It's my case now. Go home.
Go ride your motorcycle.

Go brood in a dark room.
Just don't go near Ian again.

So, anything else
or is it just these seven?

Drop it, house. She's right.

No, she's not!

- You know she's not.
- We should have called her.

I'm surprised you didn't.

You're gonna have to find a way
to let this go.

We can't go near Ian.

We don't need to go near him.

We have his tumor.

Well, cuddy may be right
that we screwed up the protocol.

She may be right
about my screwed up obsession.

But I'm right about the medicine.

How many tests can we do with that?

Look, we cure the kid,
we solve everybody's problems.

How many?

Maybe two good pieces.

How many okay pieces?

Three would be pushing it.

Three tests, seven choices.

Okay, what's first?

Sarcoidosis seems most likely.

Yeah. So likely that cuddy's gonna think
of that all on her own.

She's got the kid's whole body
to play with. Let her do that test.

What's next?

It's moving too fast to be spreading.

It has to be growing from something
that's already there.

Genetic disorder. Tuberous sclerosis.

Or it's his immune system.
Histiocytosis.

Well, there are more documented cases
of histio amongst older people

than tuberous sclerosis.
Let's start with that.

Wing or drumstick?

Gonna need a little more than that.

A little more is more than a third.

If we have to repeat this test
because you didn't cut us enough...

Chase: I'm adding one micro liter
of the immunoperoxidase.

Make it two. I don't want house
biting off our heads

because we weren't sure
if it turned red or not.

Cameron: That's definitely not red.

The problem could still be an abnormal
cell growth

but a different cell line.

Sarcoma?
Muscle cells are throughout his body.

It would explain the geography.

Genetic disorder is far more likely
in a six-year-old. Tuberous sclerosis.

Pretty unlikely to cause a gi bleed.

The time course fits.

Mr. Foreman, you agree with
both of them? Thanks for playing.

If we have enough tissue for two tests,
why not do both?

Then we don't have to think as hard.

Taking the pressure off the choice makes
us less likely to think critically.

Sarcoma is more likely to hit a six
and 70-year-old.

Tuberous sclerosis, it is.

You think sarcoma is less likely?

It's more likely.

The test for it, on the other hand,
is less reliable.

Cameron: Test is negative. Well, that's
okay.

If the tumor cells hadn't matured, the
ki-67 protein wouldn't have turned off.

- What happens if we don't solve this?
- Kid dies.

I mean for the next 12 years.

Ki-67's negative.

And pch antigen is negative.

Mighty Casey's down to his last strike.

Mighty Casey struck out.

Thanks a lot. I was gonna read that this
weekend.

Chondrocytoma. Connective tissue's been
in all the places we've been looking.

The kid is too sick for that.
We're better off testing for sarcoma.

We would've seen signs of that
when we tested for tuberous sclerosis.

The tumor cells looked like muscle
under the microscope.

No, they didn't. They looked like fat.

I vote for neurofibromatosis.

- Why?
- Because the other choices suck worse.

Give me a minute.

You want me out of here?

You come up with anything?

Hey. We can talk about it tomorrow.

I won the poker tournament.

I totally played this guy, berman,
from business affairs.

I got great cards. But I don't bet.
Just call, no raises.

Berman pairs his king on the flop.

I keep calling, the river turns,

I check. He can't stand it.

He goes all in. He's sure he's won.

I call, I flip them.

Pocket aces.

I nailed his ass.

The aces were hiding all along.

Test him for erdheim-Chester disease.

Erdheim-Chester?
That's not even on the list.

Because we already did it.
He tested negative.

- So did ester.
- The disease lied.

Yeah, the tumor's got it in for you.
Diseases don't lie.

Fine, it didn't lie. It slow played us.

We biopsied the colon,
it hadn't reached the gi tract yet.

It's there now.
It's in his liver, his lungs.

You want it to be there.

Because then you didn't screw up
12 years ago.

We can't waste our one test
on the one disease we know it's not.

Run the test.

You sure about this?

Wait. Let me think about that.
Don't pressure me.

Just run the damn test.

Cameron: Cells look like macrophages.

That's a good start.

Take your time, and say it loud.

Cd 68 positive.

Start the treatment.

So, ester can rest peaceful now, huh?

Yeah.

$40.

You got lucky.

You gonna call?

What I do

is not just based on the flip of a card.

You guessed. You got lucky.

It fit.

It could just as easily have been
sarcoma or tuberous sclerosis.

No, not just as easily.

Maybe not. But it wasn't impossible.

Are you gonna call?

You know, relative to its size,

the barnacle has the largest penis
of any animal.