All language subtitles for 17 - The Last Escape

Good evening.

You should have seen
the one that got away.

The only one I�ve ever
seen with gold lamy scales.

I�m sure all of you are interested
in the details of this catch.

It's really a matter of
finding the proper bait.

I soon learned that these
little creatures can tell,

cheap costume jewelry on
site and won't come near it.

You must bait your hook
with the real article.

And sometimes they make off with the
bait before you can reel them in.

However, that's a situation with which
most of you men are already familiar.

Tonight's fable is
entitled The Last Escape.

But first something from
which there is no escape.

THE LAST ESCPAE

-Ok, are you ready mr Ferlini?
-Ready.

Here, let me help you.

No Tommy, that's him.

They liked your husband
tonight.

That kind of crowd.

-They like you too.
-Thanks.

Tommy, I didn't mean that you
know what I feel about you.

-I mean about your singing.
-is that all you mean? Just my singing.

-Tommy me please.
-It's all right he's in his dressing room.

It's not all right. I�ve told you that
it's never all right when he's around.

Look, when am I gonna see you alone?

-Please.
-Got to give me an answer. -I got to go.

Hi honey. I was great tonight
just great. What do you say?

The gratest.

I could have gotten out the steel
boxes tonight that's how good I felt.

Hey, did you get a load of that little
guy who put me in a straight jacket?

He thought he was gonna
make it real tough on me .

Heu said I was hauling
on those straps.

Those little guys
they're the worst.

It' s a pleasure to fool them.

Look at that, look.
at that, honey.

Would anybody take me
for 46 years of age?

-What do you say?
-You're a greek god.

-Speaking of greeks. I�ve been invited
out to dinner tonight, Harry. -Ah Harry.

He spoils my appetite. I hear him talk
and think the escape business was dead.

Well he should have been out
there tonight, he's no different.

Well he booked into this joint, he
ought to know whether it's dead or not.

And uh listen Joe
tonight when with Harry,

I don't want to hear any
more of that water business,

you understand? I�m sick
of hearing about it.

Uh you're getting old
vanda that's your trouble.

That water trick's the best idea ever
had it's going to make me a headliner.

yeah don't you talk to me about
age, you know kid yourself Joe.

Trick like that water trick
might prove too much for you.

No kid huh?

I see 10 new wrinkles on your
face in the last week, sugar.

You look at yourself
lately? Go on take a look.

Here use a mirror.

Well go look
at yourself.

-Go on take a look. -Stop it Joe.
-Who you calling an old man, huh?

I�m younger new. I understand
cause I keep in shape.

-Don't you go calling me an old man, you hear me?
-All right, all right.

Not everybody thinks
I�m so old Joe.

-Not everybody.
-Ah shut up, and get dressed.

So we're supposed to go out to
dinner let's go out to dinner.

Besides I gotta talk to
Harry about something.

About the water trick.

But even he is dead,
don't forget that.

I know Houdini�s dead.

Only I�m alive me Joe Fellini.

Yeah that's one thing about you Joe you
never had any trouble with any false modesty.

What could Houdini
do that I can't I?

Work with ropes chains irons
I can get out anything.

Sacks, bags, hampers, trunks, I
could do all handcuff routines.

And I still do the fastest straightjacket
escape in the business. Besides,

you know Houdini used to
use a lot of trick stuff.

-And you don't?
-Sure sometimes.

I got my skeleton keys
phony bolts all that junk.

But you know Harry I do most of
my tricks with muscles, right?

Sure, sure.
Joe you're the greatest.

All right keep in shape.

Ask wanda here I work out an
hour a day with the barbells.

I still got great chest expansion I can
do that water trick it'll be the greatest.

But it's been done Joe that's
what I�ve been trying to tell you.

People don't get excited about
that kind of stuff anymore.

You drink too much
Harry your brain's soft.

Sure that trick's been done
but that was years ago.

There's a whole new
generation today.

All you got to do is handle that
publicity right now, will be a sensation.

Harry what do you say?

Okay how do you want
to work the act?

I expand they timing I
relax the rope falls off.

I got a skeleton key
in a seam of the pants.

As soon as I get the handcuffs
off I reach into the pants,

get out a razor blade cut
myself out of the sack,

get out of the false
bottom of the trunk,

and go to the surface
of the lake like a cork.

-It's a cinch.
-Yeah how good a swimmer are you?

The greatest you don't
have to worry about that.

When I was a kid I was gonna
swim the English channel.

That's how good I was.

Well I could put you
over in a motorboat,

pick you up the same way,
that'd lessen the risk.

That'd be easy.
I know you'd see it.

Well I don't see it.

Sounds to me like a
ticket to the graveyard.

Why? You're wrong, honey. This is a
ticket to the big time, right Harry?

Maybe, we'll have to see.

-Tell me what are you doing here? -Well
I had to see you. -I thought I don't...

I know Joe isn't here. I saw
him swimming in the lake.

What's all this swimming about anyway
he's taking it awfully seriously.

He's getting in shape.

-He's going for a long swim.
-What?

Tommy you shouldn't be here.

-You don't want any trouble neither do I.
-I didn't come here for trouble.

What did you come here for?

I didn't think I had to tell you.

Wonder you've got to leave him.

It's getting worse all the time.

You don't know what it's like.

Every year, every day.

All he thinks about
night and day is the act.

Escape, escape, escape, sometimes I
think I�m going crazy Tommy I mean it.

When we were in Louisville
last year I went to,

a headshrinker for a
while. Do you know that?

Three months it was. And
he got that job in Vegas.

that was the
end of that.

Ask me, he's the one that's crazy
treating you the way he does.

No he thinks about escaping
in his sleep sometimes.

No kidding.

Sometimes in the middle of the night he
throws off the covers and takes a bath.

-Tommy?
-Yeah?

-Would you do me a favor?
-Certainly.

Would you put these on?

Please.

Try it to get loose.

-I can't.
-Of course you can't.

Neither could Joe.

If he didn't have this
hidden on him someplace.

Now try it.

-The key, it won't turn.
-No of course it won't.

It's the wrong key.

This is the right one.

You know that water
trick he does where?

-He gets thrown into the lake.
-Yes.

Well he's gonna do it
in a couple of weeks.

That's what he's
practicing for now.

And you know what I�ve been hoping and
praying for ever since he decided to do it.

You better go now.

In casey he comes back.

Sure everything's all set I
don't want anything to go wrong.

I�m always all set.

-You sure you feel okay, huh?
-Never better.

Have a little kiss,
honey, for good lu.ck

Yeah sure, joe.

Chief Wallace, I�d like you
to meet the great Ferlini.

-Fellini. -This is mr Ralph Kremens president
of the local chamber of commerce.

Frank Petty of the Tribune.

And you've already met our
motorboat pilot mr Dave Brooks.

Well let's get started it's a
bit warm and I�m ready for a dip.

-Chief Wallace do you have the handcuffs?
-Yes I have them right here.

Now chief Wallace you've examined these
handcuffs are you sure they're genuine.

-Oh they're genuine all right.
-And will you place them on please.

-Yeah. -May we have the rope please?

Now will you gentlemen tie
this rope around the body,

of the great Ferlini and make
as many knots as you wish.

I warn you mr Ferlini, I
used to be a boy scout.

There. Now mrs Ferlini may
I have the sack please.

Our gentleman lift the great
Ferlini onto the sack please.

Now pull the sack
up over his head.

And fasten the top securely.

And now...

we have the trunk.

Now you gentlemen have examined this trunk
and tested its locks, is that correct?

The lock is okay but why do you
have all these holes in the trunk?

A good question. The holes are
there to make the trunk sink faster.

-Satisfied?
-Okay. -All right.

Will you gentlemen lift the great
Ferlini into the trunk please?

Chief Wallace.

Chief Wallace will you
secure the lock, please?

Well now are you gentlemen
satisfied that the,

great Ferlini is securely
locked in this trunk?

-We are. -Sure. -And we are ready
to put him aboard the motorboat.

I sure hope they know
what they're doing.

-Is this all right mr Miller?
-Yes this'll do fine.

All right Dave let's get
this trunk overboard.

Yes sir.

There he goes.

He's not coming up mr Miller.

He's got to come up.

He's got to.

He's not coming up.

Dear friends we are
gathered here today,

to consign the mortal
remains of Joseph,

Martin Ferlini to the
earth which bore him.

Who can say that
Joseph Ferlini,

in his last moment of
earthly glory was not happy?

In this choice which
was made for him,

by the almighty arbiter
of life and death.

Is this a Ferlini funeral?

Why yes.
-But I�m sorry to break this up reverend but,

I�m from the uh county
coroner's office.

I�m afraid the funeral
services can't continue.

We have orders to attach
the body of joseph Ferlini.

-But surely...
-What's the matter? Something wrong?

-I�m sorry ma'am, you mrs Ferlini?
-Yes.

But we have a court order to
attach your husband's body,

the coroner wanted me to
make a further examination.

I�m afraid I�ll have
to open the coffin.

-Open the coffin?
-Yes, at the caretakers cottage.

We'll make the
examination there.

Would you gentlemen please pick
up the coffin and uh follow me?

Thank you gentlemen I�ll
call you when I need you.

I�m sorry uh
you must go.

Don't look on there.

Well you got to understand
how it is in my business.

Everything is
showmanship, everything.

And that's why Ferlini
made this deal with me.

And just what was this deal?

Well nobody knew about it but him
and me. It was crazy, I told him that.

But he made me promise him
that if anything ever happened to him,

if he should die that
I would arrange a last escape.

Something that would make him be
remembered longer even than Houdini.

-And that's all it
was a trick. -A trick?

Look, I slipped the undertaker
50 bucks and he,

arranged to have him
buried someplace secretly.

Then he put an empty coffin under
the hearse and that guy from,

the coroner's office he was a
phony too just an actor I hired.

So, you see what I
mean? Showmanship.

I see,
but I�m afraid that your showmanship,

has had quite an
effect on mrs Ferlini.

-That's the unfortunate part.
-Yeah.

Well I feel pretty
rotten about that, doctor.

-Could I see her? -I�m sorry mr Miller
but that's impossible right now.

Yeah well I understand.

Well remember doctor if
there's anything I can do...

Thank you mr Miller, thank you.

Mrs Ferlini I really would
try and rest if I were you.

You must remember that things are
always much better than they seem.

That this is the best
of all possible worlds.

That every cloud
has a silver lining.

And that it is darkest
just before the dawn.

I tell you this not because of
what you have just experienced.

But for what you are about to see.

I suppose you're wondering
what became of my catch.

The game warden insisted
I throw her back in.

Because her measurements
didn't meet specifications.

In order to keep them they
must be larger than 36 22 15.

And of course it's
quite difficult knowing,

precisely where to take
that last measurements.

Next week I should be back so let us hope
I have some more luck in the meantime.

Until then, good night.