All language subtitles for Puss in Boots The Last Wish 2022 1080p WEBRip Eng

Star light, star bright,

first star I see tonight,

I wish I may, I wish I might

have this wish I wish tonight.

Once upon a time,

a Wishing Star fell from the sky.

Scorching a great woods black.

The Dark Forest was born,

the Wishing Star hidden at its center,

filling it with new life,

and the legend of a single wish
locked away in the star,

waiting to be granted.

Puss in Boots!

Puss in Boots! Puss in Boots!

Puss in Boots! Puss in Boots!

Welcome to my fiesta!

Make yourselves at home, yeah.

Come on, eat.

Drink up.

Hey! Hola, amigo.

Good to see you again.

Papa, he stepped on my face!

And we will never wash it again.

People of Cordova...

It's Del Mar!

People of Del Mar,

accept this golden gift
from Puss in Boots.

Play a song!

No, no, no. I couldn't.

Sing, Puss, sing!

Nah, I couldn't possibly...

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who's brave and ready for trouble?

You are, you are

Who's so unbelievably humble?

You are, you are

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who's the gato who rolls the dice

And gambles with his life?

Who's never been touched by a blade?

Puss in Boots is never afraid

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

¡Ay, ay, ay, ay!

Yeah!

My clothes.

My wig.

My portrait!

Oh.

Hey, Governor.

One second.

The outlaw, Puss in Boots.

Welcome! Mi casa es su casa.

No, su casa es mi casa.

Arrest these filthy peasants

and bring me the head of Puss in Boots!

Hey! This is a party!

Where is the music?

He's the blade of justice
Stands up against evil

Fighting for the people

And he's very good-looking

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Puss in Boots

Puss in Boots

Puss in Boots has never
been touched by a blade.

- Never been touched
- But you?

Skin that cat!

Governor, lighten up.

Uh-oh.

Silly guards, dogpiles don't work on cats.

Holy frijoles.

You awoke the sleeping giant of Del Mar!

Giddyap!

I'm flying!

No, you are not flying.

I will save you!

Save me, too!

If it's convenient.

You, launch me.

And the rest of you, play double time.

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Spanish Splinter.

Gracias.

Fear me, if you dare.

Yeah!

Hey, giant!

Pray for mercy from

Puss in Boots!

Hey, you want to see something cool?

Gracias, Del Mar.

You have been great!

Get home safely.

- Good night!
- Puss in Boots!

Puss in Boots! Puss in Boots!

You're still here?

Okay, okay.

One more number.

I call this one
"The Legend Will Never Die..."

Puss in Boots!

Puss? Puss.

Puss in Boots.

Where am I?

Not to worry. You're in good hands.

My hands!

I am the village doctor.

I am also the village barber,
veterinarian,

dentist and witchfinder.

And in my professional opinion,
you need a wash,

a blowout and a little trim
around the hindquarters.

That's my professional barber opinion.

But, putting on my doctor's hat,

I think we need to run a few tests.

All right. Reflexes.

Catlike.

Temperature.

Now lift your tail and relax.

Trust me, I run hot. Yep.

Then how about the latest
in modern medical technology?

Leeches!

To draw out the evil humors.

Suit yourself. More for me.

Listen, Doctor.

Thanks for everything, you know,
but I am feeling great.

Strong, like a bull! You know?

Now, do you know a good place
to get some gazpacho?

Please. This is serious.

What is it?

Puss in Boots. How do I say this?

You died.

Doctor, please.

Relax! I am Puss in Boots.

I laugh at death.

You see?

And, anyway, I am a cat.

I have nine lives.

And how many times have you died already?

I don't know.

I never counted.

I am not really a math guy, you know?

- Gato.
- Take it easy, Doctor.

Let's see.

There was the running
of the bulls in Pamplona.

Hola, señorita.

Do you like gazpacho?

Guess it's not your night, huh, fellas?

I am telling you,

a cat always lands on his feet.

Watch.

No. Puss in Boots doesn't need a spotter.

Watch.

No need to pull into port.

This will revolutionize travel.

Watch.

Excuse me. Does this have shellfish in it?

Yes, sir.

Eh.

Puss, I think you set the oven too high.

I am a master of the baking. Watch.

And then there was the giant today.

So, what is that? Like, four?

That makes eight, Puss.

You are down to your last life.

My prescription:
No more adventures for you.

You need to retire.

Me? Retire?

Are you the village comedian as well?

Puss, is there any safe place you can go?

Any special someone you can rely on

in this moment of need?

I am Puss in Boots, loved by one and all.

Anyone in particular?

I mean, how could I possibly choose?

This is the address of Mama Luna.

She is a cat fancier,

always on the lookout for a new lap cat.

- You will be safe there.
- Lap cat?

I am no lap cat, Doctor.

I am Puss in Boots!

Not anymore.

Barber's orders.

I mean, doctor's orders.

And remember, Puss,
death comes for us all.

Treat?

You've really got to work
on your bedside manner.

I am Puss in Boots.

I am no one's lap cat.

That doctor is a quack and a crazy man.

He should stick to cutting hair.

Last call, Señor Boots.

Another glass of cream.
Make it your heaviest.

Oh, I keep the heavy stuff in the back.

"Retire."

You are too good-looking to retire.

Well, well.

If it isn't Puss in Boots himself.

In the flesh.

Hey.

There's the famous hat, the feather

and, of course, the boots.

My compliments to your cobbler.

Thanks.

Good to meet you, too.

Hey. I never do this,
but can I get your autograph?

Been following you for a long time.

Sign right there.

Puss in Boots laughs in the face of death,

bounty hunter.

So I've heard.

You will find your reward
does not come easily.

This I tell you.

Everyone thinks they'll be
the one to defeat me,

but no one's escaped me yet.

All right.

Let's get it over with.

Fear me, if you...

Okay, no more messing around.

Slow. Sloppy. Sad.

You're not living up to the legend, gato.

I just love the smell of fear.

What's the matter?

Lives flashing before your eyes?

Pick it up.

Pick it up.

Corre, corre, gatito.

I am no longer worthy.

I'm sorry.

We are gathered here today

to say goodbye to Puss in Boots.

There are no words to express such a loss.

Thank you.

But it would be a crime not to try.

He was known across the land
by many names.

The Stabby Tabby.

El Macho Gato.

The Leche Whisperer.

To some, an outlaw.

To more, a hero.

To all, a legend.

I was right.

Words were not enough.

But perhaps a song.

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

You were, you were

I told you health department people,

there are no cats here!

Meow?

Oh!

You're not from the health department,
are you?

No, you're not. We better get you inside

because, baby, they are always watching.

I am Mama Luna, and this is my home.

And now it's your home, too.

Your forever home.

Ow!

Kitty gets a bath

The kitty gets a bath

Hi-ho, the...

I bet you never even had a name.

But you know what,
I have thought of something perfect.

I shall call you

Pickles!

Brother cats, sister kitties,

meet your new roommate.

Say hello, Pickles.

Meow, eh?

What? Did I say something salty?

It's my second language.

Stupid mittens.

Get off me.

Oh, no.

This is a person potty, Pickles.

That's your potty.

So, this is where dignity goes to die.

No, no way.

Meow.

You got the scent?

These are too small,

and these are too big.

But these ones...

These ones are just right.

Baby! Track that cat.

Do you mind?

I'm trying to eat here.

I mean, meow. Whatever.

Oh, sorry.

Oh, oh, oh. You're a talking cat?

I'm a talking cat.

Let's talk.

I'd rather eat.

Oh, not a problem.

We can eat and talk at the same time.

No hablo ingles.

¿Hablas español? ¡Yo también!

¡Ah! ¿De dónde eres?
¿Te gustan las siestas?

I don't speak Spanish, either.

You're funny.

- Okay. Good talk.
- Hang on.

Pickles? Is that your name?

Me, I don't have a name or a home.

So, I'm no expert,
but you don't look like a Pickles.

Well, you don't look like a cat.

Okay, okay, okay.

Full disclosure: I'm not a cat.

- I'm a dog.
- Hi, Bon Bon.

Meow.

Oh, Pickles has a new girlfriend? Okay.

I live under the porch.

It can get a little lonely down there.

It's mostly controlled
by the rats and the centipedes,

but I have my own little corner.

Congratulations.

I just come up here
for the food and the friends.

Mostly the food.

Please don't tell anyone. I need this.

I won't tell. I don't care.

So you'll keep my secret?

A secret between friends?

Just a secret.

It's funny.
Despite all this best friend bonding,

you're still a mystery to me, Pickles.

What's your story?

My story...

What are we looking at?

...is over.

Oh, no.

Want to rub my belly?

What's happening?

- Rub.
- Hard pass.

Come on, rub. I need the practice.

I'm gonna be a therapy dog someday.

What the hell are you talking about?

I'm glad you asked.

When people feel bad,
they can rub my belly.

It'll make 'em feel better. Rub my belly.

- No. No.
- Come on, rub it.

- Not happening. No.
- Rub it.

Let me be clear.

I don't want to touch your belly, okay?

Okey-doke. So what do you want?

I want to be left alone.

You're back.

Oh, I never left.

The wolf. He found me.

Hello, missus.

We're looking for a cat.

This cat.

We've got an offer for him.

What could they possibly want
to offer Puss in Boots?

- What's a Puss in Boots?
- Seriously?

I told you health department people,

there are no cats here.

Make her talk.

Excuse me, my darling.

We're looking
for the legendary Puss in Boots.

Have you perhaps seen him?

Too soft.

Out with it, you old biddy,

or I'll have your guts for garters.

Too hard. That was not just right.

Oi, Baby, sniff him out.

You don't tell me what to do.

Listen to your sister, Baby.

Oh, she's not my sister!

She's a fugitive orphan.

- Ow!
- She is your sister.

Do as she says.

Fine, but all I can smell is cats' pee.

Everybody!

Get to the safe room,
just like we practiced!

Oi. She's leggin' it.

Follow me, children! Ow!

Give her the piano treatment, Papa.

Oh! You think this is the first time

I've been stuffed in a piano?

Here we go!

Roll out the barrel...

- Oh.
- Mama, focus, please.

Hey! There's cats everywhere!

So many cats!

Amateurs.

I'll be outside.

My cats can play better than you.

Now's the time to roll out the barrel...

Goldi, is this him?

That's a dog in a cat costume.

Oh, yeah.

Tricky little bugger.

How about this one? He's a ginger.

Is that a joke?

You think this scruffy,
geriatric bag of bones

looks like a legend?

This is definitely not...

Puss in Boots! I found him!

Puss in Boots, dead and buried.

Dead? No, no, no, he can't be.

Yep. The nose never lies.

Well, that's that, then.

What say we go and hibernate, huh?

- No.
- Ow!

The map is being delivered tonight,

and we have one chance to steal it.

Without it,
we'll never find the Wishing Star.

The Wishing Star.

It does exist.

That star has one wish to grant.

One wish?

Think of what that could mean for us.

Nine lives. Yes!

Well, I don't see why we needed to hire

Puss in Boots in the first place.

Because nobody steals
from Big Jack Horner.

No! Not Jack Horner.

Don't worry, love.
We'll get that wish somehow.

Thank you, Mama.

Yeah, because I've got a plan.

I can nick a map as good as any old cat.

You've got a plan?

What? I'm smart, ain't I? Ain't I, Papa?

No, you ain't well-fixed for brains.

Robbing Big Jack Horner, very risky.

But that wish could get me my lives back.

And my life back.

Goodbye, Pickles!

Oh, no, Pickles, you're leaving?

Perro, start digging.

Okay.

But if this Puss in Boots
is such a big deal,

maybe we shouldn't be
desecrating his grave.

No, I don't think he would mind,
because he

is me!

Oh. Okay.

Oh, yeah.

Normally, I have a sword.

It's like a whole thing, you know?

Pickles, you're Puss in Boots?

Not yet, but I will be.

I'll come...

- I'll come with you.
- Sorry, perro.

Puss in Boots walks alone!

Open the gates!

Hands off the merchandise. We got this.

Okay. Just get in and get out.

- Easy-peasy.
- Lemon squeezy.

What are you doing here?

I brought you a sword.

That's not a sword. That's a stick.

- It's a stick sword.
- Go home.

Well, my home is where my friends are.

Again, not friends.

Rub for luck?

I don't need luck for this.

I am a highly skilled master cat thief.

Watch.

You got this.

I pronounce this batch delicious.

Ship 'em out.

Mr. Horner.

The Serpent Sisters got the goods.

Is it? Is it the map to the Wishing Star?

Stop everything. You two, come with me.

We must get this to the trophy room.

You know, it took a lot of murdering
to get this map.

It all started...

Take it to the trophy room!

What the...

Wow. Look at all the magic stuff.

Yes, I collect enchanted objects,

magical icons, bobbles and geegaws

and la-di-da and blah-blah-blah.

Check it out.
I'm walking on a magic carpet.

Sweet.

The shrunken ship of the Lilliputians.

Shut up! Are those unicorn horns?

Baby unicorn horns.

Half as heavy, twice as sharp.

- Savage.
- They're trinkets.

They're nothing compared
to the awesome power

of the magic Wishing Star.

Speaking of which,
make with the box, sister.

You got it, boss.

Like I was saying,

the amount of murdering we...

Make with the box!

After so many years of searching,

this is my moment.

With this wish, I will finally be

the master of all magic.

Hey, Little Jack.

Excuse me?

Could you do the thumb thing?

Like in the fairy tale?

It wasn't a fairy tale!

It was only a nursery rhyme.

Oh, yeah. The lame one.

Little Jack Horner sat in the corner

Eating a Horner pie

Stuck in my thumb
Pulled out a plum

And said, "What a good boy am I"

Look! A magic puppet.

'Cause I'm a real boy

No strings attached

Thank you. Thank you.

What's impressive?

I've been a boy the whole time.

Little Jack Horner didn't have any magic.

He was a pathetic, buttered baker's boy.

Little Jack's dead!

I'm Big Jack Horner.

Mr. Big Jack Horner, sir,

- I barely know her.
- What do you mean?

We're sisters, you goof.

We got matching face tattoos.

Easy-peasy, lemon squeezy.

- Puss?
- Kitty?

- Puss.
- Kitty!

This is my job.

No, this is my job.
I'm double-crossing the bears.

No, I am double-crossing the bears.

They tried to hire me earlier today.

Well, they tried to hire me two weeks ago.

That makes you plan B.

Ah-ha!

There it is.

Now, about your payment.

Hold up.
You promised us our weight in gold.

I did, didn't I?

Ever hear of the Midas touch?

Ah, cool. Dibs.

Oh, no. I misjudged the situation.

This is why you don't cross Jack Horner.

What is this?

Are you a pirate now?

It's like a possum crawled
on your face and died.

Of shame.

Please, mock me quietly.

I hate it. It's disgusting.

Well, I love it. It's distinguished.

Great plan, Baby. Real catlike.

Can I go?

Pleasure doing...

- Puss in Boots?
- Goldi. Bears.

- Hola, Jack.
- Kitty Softpaws.

My, you have a lot of nerve
coming back here.

Please. I was the best thief
you ever hired.

- You robbed me.
- You set me up.

You said you were going
on some spiritual retreat.

Namaste.

And you're supposed to be dead.

I got better?

Just give us the map.

- And throw in a dozen pies.
- Eh?

Have you got any savory pies?

- What? No.
- Yeah, what flavors you got?

Can we get all of that in a bag to go?

Oh, would you stop talking
about blooming pies? Focus!

Hand over that map,

or I'll punch holes in the lot of ya.

- Oh, bums.
- Look out! It's coming down!

Ha!

I hate talking fairy tale animals!

What? Get back here!

The best thief has won.

You're right.

She did.

Oh, come on!

There. They're getting away.

No, no, no!

Nice catching up with you, Puss.

Got to go.

Here, kitty, kitty.

Is that a stick?
What are you gonna do with that...

- Ow!
- Ow! Me knuckles!

You shouldn't have done that, mate.

This idiot.

Hey, Puss. I found a sandwich in here.

I think it's tuna fish.

- Drive, perro!
- Okey-doke.

Oh, cool. Another member of the team.

We are not a team.

Eyes on the road!

Who is this guy?

- I'm Puss' best friend.
- No, he isn't.

And his therapy dog.

Definitely not.

Finally. You need therapy.

Give me the map. Trust me.

Trust you? Like I did in Santa Coloma?

Really? Santa Coloma?

Sí, Santa Coloma.

- Mine!
- Mine!

- Mine!
- Mine!

Good people, accept this golden gift

from Puss in Boots!

Speed up! Go, go, go!

Assemble the Baker's Dozen.

Careful with this.

I'll take this and that.

Oh, and these. One of those.

And I got to take that. Yes. Yes.

No. Yes! Oh, yeah!

All of these!

This one is right.

I'll get you, my kitties,
and your little dog, too.

What? This is blank.

We've been ripped off! Where is the...

Oh. Yeah. I knew it was gonna do that.

"The Dark Forest is deep and far.

Within its bounds, you'll find the star."

The Dark Forest?

No one goes into the Dark Forest.

Or comes out.

"A single wish burns true and bright.

This map's the key, so hold on tight."

Suéltalo.

- You let go.
- A stick?

What happened to your sword?

Got rid of it, you know.

Made things too easy.

I needed a challenge.

Yeah, you looked
pretty challenged back there.

There's no way
I'm letting you hold the map.

Well, there's no way
I'm letting you hold the map.

I can hold it.

Yeah, right. What's your deal, anyway?

You run with the Chihuahua Gang?

I don't think so.

- I don't believe you.
- That's okay.

As long as you believe in yourself.

What...

Is he deranged?

- Yep.
- What's your name?

Oh, I've been called all kinds of things.

Dog, Bad Dog, Stupid Dog.

Hey You! You There!
Get Out! Leave It! Drop It!

Big Rat, Small Pig, Rat Face,

Butt Nugget, ...for Brains.

You know, that sort of thing.

But I've never had a name
that really stuck, you know?

That belonged to me.

- Is he done?
- And you are?

Softpaws.

Kitty Softpaws.

Wow. Yeah. Now, that's a good name.

There's music in a name like that.

Kitty Softpaws.

Nice try. Classic con.

No one's that dumb. No one's that nice.

I don't trust you.

Me, neither. He cannot be trusted.

But I trust him more than I trust you.

Wow. This trip is going to be fun.

This must be the Dark Forest.

Oh, my God!

It's gone.

It's back.

Ay, qué miedo.

Nothing to worry about.

We step through as one.

Ready?

One, two, after you.

Wait, what?

Dog? Still alive?

- Let's go find out.
- Wait!

Wow.

For a Dark Forest,
this place is pretty colorful.

I wish I had my quinceañera here.

The Wishing Star is in here somewhere.

Kitty, may I please see the map?

- No.
- Seriously!

You won't let me hold it
for even one minute?

Nope. Not even for one second.

Come on, Kitty. You've got to trust me.

Wait. What's going on with his eyes?

Oh, they're getting bigger.

Oh, Kitty!

You got to trust him. Look at those eyes.

Really? You call that cute?

Oh, look at her!

Those eyes are even bigger than yours.

Do whatever she wants, Puss.

Wait a second. So poofy!

No. With the paws?

Come on.

With the hat?

It's all so cute!

Cuteness overload!

Can we look at the map now?

"Follow this enchanted chart.

It knows your path and knows your heart."

Is that us?

It says we must go through
the Valley of Incineration

over Undertaker Ridge,

through the Cave of Lost Souls?

- Really?
- Let me take a look.

What?

Swamp of Infinite Sorrows?

Mountains of Misery?

The Abyss of Eternal Loneliness?

There's something wrong with this map.

I guess there is a different
terrible path for everyone.

It's almost like the forest

doesn't want anyone to make a wish.

Well, I don't even have a wish,
but can I try?

Oh, mine says

we skip through the Pocket Full of Posies.

What?

Then drift down the River of Relaxation.

- That sounds fun.
- No fair.

Why does he get the good one?

Wander the Fields
of Quick and Easy Solutions,

and arrive at the star.

Oh, wow! That sounds wonderful.

Oh, but no. This is your quest.

I don't want to impose.

- You hold the map.
- Really?

But don't you cross me,

or your name will be Perro Muerto.

Okey-dokey.

Wait. Is that...

It's raining bears. Time to go.

Oh, I'm tellin' ya,

when we get that wish,

it will make everything
just right for all of us.

Will it make us rich?

Rich enough to hibernate
all the year round?

The richest.

Will we be, like, big-time thieves?

The biggest.

Eh, you know that suit Jack Horner wears?

- Yeah.
- I'm going to have one of them.

- Yeah?
- Only mine will be purpler.

- Like, twice as purpler.
- The purplest!

Nice.

Big-time thieves coming through!

- I'll race ya!
- You can't beat me, old man!

What kind of wish can do all that, Goldi?

Oh, I can't tell ya.

If you say what your wish is,
then it don't come true.

Sorry. Birthday wish rules.

Oh, come on. Mother-daughter secret?

Mama, just drop it, please.

Oh. Oh, okay.

Hey, come on.

We've got some cats to catch.

Birthday wish rules? What's that mean?

It means I am not telling you my wish.

He doesn't want to tell us
because it's something stupid.

Like conditioner
for that thing on his face.

It's distinguished.

What about you, Kitty?
What are you gonna wish for?

Can't tell you.

Birthday wish rules or whatever.

Ha! I bet your wish
is something stupid like...

You're such a...

This must be the Pocket Full of Posies.

Out of the way, demon flower.

It's pruning time!

Aw, thank you.

We don't have time for this.

Perro, I thought your path
was supposed to be easy.

You know, I think all you have to do

is stop and smell the roses.

Seriously?

This is stupid.

All I smell is bull...

Watch.

Don't rush through it.

Take your time and really appreciate

what's right in front of you.

His path is so corny.

- Gracias.
- And cheesy.

- And lame.
- And weird, like him.

Yeah. Why are you so ridiculous, dog?

What's your story?

My story? Oh.

It's actually a very funny story.

Back when I was a pup,

me and my littermates lived with a family.

A family full of pranksters
who liked to play hide-and-seek,

and I was always it.

Pick on the little guy, am I right?

They tried putting me
in a packing crate, a dumpster.

No matter how hard they tried,
I'd always find them.

So, one day, they get creative

and they put me in a sock
with a rock in it.

And then throw me in a river.

I gnawed a hole in the sock,

and I swam to the surface.

Never found them or my littermates.

So I guess I'm still it.

Wow.

That is the saddest funny story
I've ever heard.

Well, joke's on them.

That sock they put me in, I grew into it.

So, I got a great story
and a free sweater out of it.

Win-win.

Dude, you didn't win.

You of all people should have a wish.

I already have a comfy sweater
and two best friends.

I got everything I could wish for.

No magic required.

Oh, lovely.

Oh, we're getting really close.

I can smell two cats, a dog and pie?

Well, if it isn't the idiots
who tried to steal from me.

Hey, he remembers us.

Behold, Excali...

Excali...

Excalibur!

Yeah, I couldn't get this rock off of it,

but still pretty cool, right?

He's gaining on us!

Okay, little left.

That's it!

- Go faster!
- He's up me back door.

Goldi!

Oh, look!

Well, start chopping!

On it! You don't have to tell me twice.

I'm gonna chop the heck
out of this Ficus lyra...

Jerry, no!

Avenge me, Jack!

Die, die, die!

Nope.

Time to bring out the big guns.

Guess I overpacked.

Magic snacks.

Save those for later.

Ha! Pay dirt.

All right, magical locust, defoliate.

Fly and feast.

Eat those flowers.

I'm not a magic locust.

Why, I'm not a locust at all.

What are you, then?
Some sort of demon grasshopper?

A deadly fairy?

Put a spell on the forest, then.

I don't cast spells.

- Well, what do you do?
- Well, I judge you.

I sit on your shoulder
and judge your actions

and the quality of your character.

I'm your conscience.

I really did overpack.

Help me, Jack! Help!

Aren't you gonna help him, Jack?

You're losing a lot of men.

I'm not really stressing
about the manpower.

I've got a bottomless bag
of magic weapons.

These babies are gonna get me that wish

even after the whole team
is dead and gone.

Now, now, Jack, as your conscience, I...

Oh, my word!

It's the noble phoenix.

She's the symbol of rebirth
and the eternal...

Oh!

Pretty boss flamethrower, right?

I really have my work
cut out for me on this one.

Don't be near where I'm flame-throwing.

Do your job, demon flowers.

Soon.

Okay, Kitty, I think I've got it now.

- Trust me!
- Easy, easy.

You're gonna give yourself a hernia.

Here, one more time. Like this.

Trust me.

Aw. But of course I trust you and Puss,

even without the eyes.

Yeah? Big mistake.

What do you mean? You're my friends.

You know what trust gets you?

A sock, a rock and a swim in the river.

You have to trust somebody, right?

Not me.

Whenever I've let my guard down,

I've been double-crossed,
declawed, played and betrayed.

Never again.

I am a solo act.

I keep my secrets,
and I play my cards close.

That's how you get a winning hand.

Take it from me.

Never trust anyone.

Wait.

That's amazing.

You're good.

Kitty, I've been thinking.

Thinking about what?

My beautiful beard.

It is very distinguished, yes,

but it does deprive the world
a good look at the face.

So, if it will make you happy,
I could be convinced to...

- I've gotten used to it.
- Wait, what?

The beard. Keep it.

Well, you see...

Kitty, please,
get this itchy thing off of me!

It's like a fever on my face!

Hold on. Is the great Puss in Boots
asking for help?

Sí, help. You were right.

- The beard is disgusting.
- And?

And it's like a possum crawled on my face.

And?

And died of shame.

Okay, okay, possum face.

I won't make you beg.

Ow!

Hey, slow down. Oh!

Go with the grain.

You got to go with the grain.

- I know what I'm doing.
- Hey!

I'm a master of the blade. Right, Perrito?

What? What? What's funny?

- Nothing should be funny.
- Quieto.

Ah, there's that handsome face I remember.

The face I haven't seen since...

- Hey!
- ...Santa Coloma.

Ah, yes. Santa Coloma.

You had it coming.

Here. You can have my gatito blade.

Thank you.

Better than a stick.

Vaya con Dios, stick sword.

Perro, what are you doing?

Perro.

Where did that crazy dog go?

I think you like him.

No. No, I don't.

I think you're ready to name him.

No, I just need his easy path
to get my wish.

You mean my wish.

You mean my wish!

Sorry.

- The Baker's Dozen.
- Let him go.

Oh, I don't know. I might keep him.

Would you like a treat?

Nice granny bag, Little Jack.

It's not a granny bag.

It is a magic nanny bag.

Now, make with the map,

or we'll see
what the unicorn horn really does.

You're not gonna shoot a puppy,
are you, Jack?

Yeah, in the face. Why?

What the...

Give us the map, or else

- the baker man gets it.
- Yeah!

I don't even have the map,
Little Bo Creep.

Stop throwing my men at me!

Come here!

Puss in Boots has the map!

Let's get him!

I've got a plan.

First one to the dog gets the wish!

What?

Oh, come on!

Steady.

What?

So that's what they do. Cool.

No! Not cool.

Ah, you shot me.

Ah, the sight's off.

- I got him, Mr. Horner!
- My bad.

Oh, no.

Puss, wait!

Perro.

Thanks for the map, Softpaws.

- No, no, no!
- No!

Oi! You've just been crimed
by the Three Bears Crime Family.

- Yeah!
- So long, you plonkers!

¡Los voy hacer a todos alfombras de baño!

Puss, where are you?

Puss? Puss?

Puss!

Puss.

What's wrong?

Thank you, Perrito.

What's going on with you, Puss?

I am down to my last life.

And I...

I am afraid.

Well, it's okay to be afraid.

No, not for Puss in Boots.

I'm supposed to be a fearless hero.

A legend.

But without lives to spare, I am nothing.

I need that wish to get my lives back.

You should tell Kitty.

- She would understand...
- No, no, no.

She cannot hear of this.

Okay.

¿Adónde fueron ese idiota y su perro?

Kitty will never trust me again.

Not after Santa Coloma.

But that's just one bad heist.

Santa Coloma wasn't a heist, Perrito.

It was a church, with a priest and guests.

And Kitty.

Everything but me.

I ran away then, too.

Oh. Oh.

Oh!

You left her at the altar?

It was wrong. I know.

I am ashamed.

I just wish I hadn't hurt her so badly.

I regret that day.

So, maybe you should tell that to Kitty.

Might make you feel better.

Might make her feel better, too.

Puss! Dog!

Oh, there you are.

What happened back there?

Kitty. I lost the map.

I messed up.

We'll get it back.

We've been in worse pickles.

Who told you that name?

What name?

Nothing.

The bears! We have to find them
before they find the star.

Oh! We are so close.

It's finally happening.

I can taste that wish now.

And you know what it tastes like?

- Pies?
- Pies

Who ate all the pies?
Who ate all the pies?

We did, we did, we did, we did

We ate all the pies

Oh, it's gonna be wicked.

Yeah. Imagine us,
a big-time crime syndicate.

Not a big-time crime syndicate, love.

A big-time crime family.

Isn't that right, Goldi?

- Goldi?
- What?

Hey, look, the map is going all fizzly.

What did you do?

- Give it me. No, no, no.
- Hey!

Goldi, no biting!

You're the smash, I'm the grab.

I hold the map.

- You got it?
- Okay!

"To find your wish, adjust your view.

What you seek
may be right in front of you."

Well, that's a load of rubbish.
What's that supposed to mean?

Right in front of us.

It looks like our cabin back home.

You really think our cabin

is in the middle of the Dark Forest?

Baby, give it the old sniff test.

Something's cooking.

No.

Do not open that door.

We are home! Hello, door.

Oh, no, don't go inside...

Maybe just a quick pop in.

- Hello, chairs.
- What say we hibernate?

Hello, honey.

Hello, my old friend.

I have missed you so...

Look, Goldi. Porridge.

And it's made just the way you like it.

No matter how you make it,
she doesn't like it.

Stop it, all of you.

Maybe our wishes have been granted.

Just stop. It's not our wish granted.

It's an obstacle.

It's the forest playing tricks.

This isn't real. None of this is...

Aw. That was your favorite book.

You used to stare at it for hours.

Too hard.

Too soft.

Just right.

Oh, this was it.

What was it, Mama?

The day a little orphan girl

broke into our cabin and stole our hearts.

The day when our world became just right.

How's it going?
Can you see anything up there?

Not yet, Perrito...

- You okay?
- Sí, I am good.

So good.

If you wanted to hold my hand,
all you had to do is ask.

Just feel free to pull me up

whenever you get a chance.

Oh, I was just remembering

the last time I offered you my hand.

Only, that time,
I believe you had cold feet.

Kitty,

about that day.

Puss in Boots is not
supposed to be afraid.

But outside that church in Santa Coloma,

that was the first time I ever felt fear.

So I ran.

It was a mistake, Kitty.

It's okay.

- No, no. It was cowardly.
- It's okay.

- You alone at the altar.
- Puss.

In your beautiful, poofy wedding dress.

Puss! It's okay.

I didn't show up, either.

Wait, what?

What do you mean, you didn't show up?

Well, I knew I could never compete

with your one true love.

- Who?
- Yourself.

The legend.

I wasn't gonna show up for that guy.

But you don't seem like that guy anymore.

Everything okay up there?

I'm giving you a thumbs-up,
just so you know.

Puss!

Look.

What do you think, bug?

Do I wait for the cats to steal the map
and then kill them,

or do I just kill everybody all at once?

You know, I'm starting to think

you don't appreciate the value of a life.

What? No.

I mean, I love these guys.

Flex the glutes. I need a solid surface.

There's good in all people.
There's good in all people.

You know, Jack, maybe we need
to dig a little deeper.

Tell me about your childhood.

You know, I never had much as a kid.

Just loving parents
and stability and a mansion

and a thriving baked goods enterprise
for me to inherit.

Useless crap like that.

But once I get my wish,

I'll finally have the one thing
that will make me happy.

Oh, well, what's that?

All of the magic in the world.

For me.

And no one else gets any.

- Is that so much?
- Yes!

Agree to disagree.

All right, bring it over.

Help!

Sweet Mother of Goose, Jack!

Well, you know what they say.

Can't bake a pie
without losing a dozen men.

Oh. Oh!

That was horrible.

Your wish is horrible.

You're horrible!

You're an irredeemable monster!

Oh, oh. What took you so long, idiot?

You're not chatty, are you?

Okay, you take the window,
I'll take the chimney.

What do I take?

Oh, you take it easy, Perrito.

We need you to stay here and...

- Guard our rear.
- Yeah. Yeah.

On your six.
Got your rears eyeballed and covered.

Hands in, crew.

Ready?

Go, Team Friendship!

Team Friendship?

I did not agree to this.

Yeah, do better. Try harder.

Well, just a placeholder name, you know.

I'll workshop it, okay?

- Go get 'em, tiger.
- Hey!

Take it easy.

Ready to get our wish back?

"Our wish"?

Well, I've been thinking,
if you play your cards right,

maybe we could share the wish.

Share the wish.

It's gone!

Wake up.

Someone's nicked the map.

What's all this?
What's all this bother about?

Oi! Did you not hear her?

The map is missing.

Somebody took it.

Hola.

Oi! You criming us
when we just crimed you?

No, no crime-backs.

Oh, you're dead cat meat.

Okay, okay, okay.

It's all yours!

Nowhere to go, Softpaws.

Really? Let's see what the map has to say.

No!

- Our cabin!
- My honey!

What the dickens?

Oh, no, you don't.

Oh, no.

- We're coming, Gol...
- I'll get it. I'll get it.

- Get off me, you big lump.
- Hold still.

Hold on! I'm coming, Team...

Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry!

Uh-oh.

- Shall we dance? I'll lead.
- What...

Too hot!

Too cold! Brain freeze.

Oh, that is just right.

Aye? What the...

No!

Oi! Forget something?

They got Perrito!

Don't worry, we can track them with this.

Wait, stop!

Puss, watch out!

Kitty!

Puss!

Look!

There, there they are. Just out there.

You go get Perrito.
I'll find a way out of here.

Puss.

Hey, good-looking.

What is that?

Why so jumpy, amigo?

What's happening?

Hello, Puss. Gazpacho?

Long time, no see.

Always a pleasure to see me.

Hola, number nine

It's a proper party
now that all nine of us are here.

- Yeah!
- ¡Sí! Fiesta!

You know what?

I love you guys.

So, you are my former lives?

Reflections of the good old days.

Okay.

Back when we were larger than life.

- A legend.
- We dance.

We sing

- We are strong.
- Like the bull.

Numero nueve, you remember this one?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Who is your favorite fearless hero?

Well, that's it. Game over, innit?

Them cats stole the stolen map we stole,

and we ended up with diddly-squat:
Nothing.

Or maybe we could be happy without a wish.

What are we doing? They ain't coming back.

Goodbye, purple trousers.

Oh, they'll come back for him.

You're darn tootin'.

Puss and Kitty always rescue me
when I'm kidnapped,

which happens a lot,

'cause we're a team.

- Aw, that's lovely.
- Yep.

Team Friendship.

No! That is a crap name.

Well, we're still workshopping it.

Oh, them cats ain't gonna risk their lives

for this daft little pup.

You're just saying that
because you want to eat 'im.

I do not.
I just want to pet him with my teeth.

Stop thinking about your belly, Baby.

In fact, stop thinking, period.

You'll just hurt yourself, you muppet.

"Muppet."

And why would I listen to

a porridge-stealing orphan like you?

- You're not even a bear.
- Zing!

I'm more of a bear than you are.

She got you.

You're nothing but a low-rent Cinderella.

Oh!

Well, that's rich coming from you, Baby,

'cause you know what you are?

Wait for it.

You're a daft, fat,

slow-thinking, no-reading, Lyme-diseased,

flea-ridden dingleberry bear.

Boom!

I haven't got dingleberries.

No, you do. You do have 'em.

Dingleberries!

Oi! You shut up, you little mutt,

or I'll cut you from pooper to snooter!

I'm in the mix now.

Okay! Okay, here we go.

You're all a bunch of knuckle-dragging,

honey-scrounging, grub...

...oafish, munching,

mangy... nugget...

...and your snooter!

I like the cut of his jib.

Ah, this is great.

Razzin' and ribbin' and barbin'
and poopin' and snootin'.

Oh, I wish I had a family like this.

Speaking from one orphan
to another, Goldi,

you won the orphan lottery.

I like his jib as well.

- Let's keep him.
- What?

Where'd he go?

- No! We said no crime-backs.
- No, Baby, wait!

Ow! Not the bees!

The legend will never die

Bravo!

One more number.

No, no, sorry, fellas.

This has been fun, huh?

Yeah, but could you tell me
how to get out of here?

I've got to get back to Dog and Kitty.

I thought you were going to get the wish.

You got the map. You don't need them.

Yeah, get those lives back.

Become the legend again, town to town.

Party to party.

Puss in Boots walks alone.

Yeah, Puss in Boots walks alone.

Was the legend so big
there was no room for anyone else?

Oh, the legend's still big, gato.

It's you that got small.

Yeah, you changed, man.

I hear he's best friends with a dog now.

And he doesn't even have a sword.

Some hero.

You've become a scaredy-cat.

We should call him Wuss in Boots.

Ah, no, no, no.

Didn't you hear? His new name is Pickles.

So lame.

Where is your litter box, Pickles?

You know what? You guys are jerks.

Which is very conflicting for me.

I'll find my own way out. Adiós.

Oh, you think you are better than us?

Without us,
you will always live a life of...

Fear.

You.

I do love the smell of fear.

It's intoxicating.

It is?

Sorry to crash the party
with your past lives.

Or your past deaths,

as I like to call them.

And I was there to witness all of them.

Each frivolous end.

But you didn't even notice me

because Puss in Boots laughs
in the face of death, right?

But you're not laughing now.

You are no bounty hunter.

You are...

Death.

And I don't mean it metaphorically

or rhetorically or poetically
or theoretically

or in any other fancy way.

I'm Death, straight up.

And I've come for you, Puss in Boots.

But I'm still alive.

You know,

I'm not a cat person.

I find the very idea of nine lives absurd.

And you didn't value any of them.

So, why don't I do us both a favor

and take this last one now?

That's cheating!

Don't tell.

Run, Puss in Boots!

Make the wish!

Go ahead, run for it.

Makes it more fun for me.

Run.

Run.

Hey, Puss.

Run.

Puss! Puss, we're here!

Where's he going?

That's the third time

we've passed that same rock, Baby.

Oh, not again.

What do you want me to do?

I've lost the scent.

You only have one job.

The one thing that makes you
mildly useful is your nose,

and apparently, you can't even use that.

- Goldi.
- I'm starting to think

this wish isn't what you promised us.

- Leave off, Baby.
- So, what is it, eh?

What's your "just right"?
What's so blasted important

that you've got us stranded
in this haunted forest?

I'm getting a family! That's what.

A proper family.

Then everything will be just right.

Your "just right" is getting rid of us?

Well, I guess some people
just stick around

until the porridge is gone, eh, Goldi?

Come on.

You didn't think I would actually stay.

I'm not a bear.

I was always afraid
it was too good to last.

And whether you think
we're your family or not,

if this is something
that will make you happy,

we'll get you that wish.

Come on, boys.

Oh, what a good boy am I.

"Star light, star bright,

first star I see tonight,

I wish..."

I can't believe I fell for it again.

Kitty, you don't understand.

Don't understand what?

That you've been playing me
this whole time?

I need this wish.

Oh, yeah? You want to know
what my wish was?

Someone, anyone I could trust.

Hey!

In my whole life, I've never had that.

But I thought I finally found that someone

without a wish.

I thought it was you.

But you're still running.

Still the same old Puss in Boots.

But I am not! I am not Puss in Boots.

I'm...

I am on my last life.

I need to get my lives back.

Without them, I am not...

What? The legend?

I still can't compete
with your one true love.

Go on, get your lives back.

Just keep them out of mine.

Kitty, Death is after me!

What?

I've been called a lot of things,

but never Death.

I like it.

- That's my wish!
- Oi!

That's Goldi's wish.

Grab him!

Move! Out of my way!

I've got it! I've got it! Don't got it.

That's mine.

Bang, bang, bang!

Oh, come on. You walked into that one.

Mr. Horner, I need your help!

Duly noted,
but a little busy at the moment.

Pew, pew!

Mr. Horner!

Ah-ha! It's bear season.

Oi, I'm gonna bust you up, plum thumb,

and then I'm gonna wear your clothes.

That was weird.

No, no, no.

Baby!

- Mama, help!
- I got you!

- Papa!
- Son, I'm coming!

- Got you.
- Help!

- Hold on!
- Something's happening!

Help me!

Help! No, no, no!

Hang on, son!

I can't stop it!

Mama, I'm slipping!

I'm slipping.

Like I told you, Baby,
you're the smash, I'm the grab.

Yes! Yes!

No!

Hey, Softpaws,
how do you like these apples?

Die! Blow up already.

Softpaws.

Okay.

Okay, you know,
maybe it's time to bury the hatchet!

Oh, I shouldn't have telegraphed it!

Yeah, I don't know what to do with this,

but if you think you need those lives...

Thank you, Perrito.

You know, I've only ever had one life,

but sharing it with you and Kitty

has made it pretty special.

Maybe one life is enough.

What is that?

Who's that?

He's here for me.

Puss!

I've enjoyed the chase, gato,

but I think we've reached
the end now, you and I.

You gonna take the coward's way out?

Run away to more lives?

Or are you gonna fight?

Pick it up.

Go on, pick it up.

What's the matter?

Lives flashing before your eyes?

No.

Just one.

I'm done running.

Fear me, if you dare.

This is gonna be fun.

Bien.

Muy bien.

You really got to stop losing that.

Say hello to my gatito blade.

Come on!

Pick it up.

I know I can never defeat you, lobo,

but I will never stop
fighting for this life.

¿Por qué diablos fui a jugar
con mi comida?

You're ruining this for me.

I came here for an arrogant little legend

who thought he was immortal.

But I don't see him anymore.

Live your life, Puss in Boots.

Live it well.

You know we will meet again, right?

Sí. Hasta la muerte.

You know,

when you said Death was after you,

I thought you were just
being melodramatic.

The wish is yours.

You deserve someone you can trust.

I don't need it.

I've got what I wished for.

No magic required.

Ah, magic snacks.

Holy frijoles.

I was worried for a second
I would come out naked,

but my clothes grew, too. Cool.

Thank you.

Gotcha.

The last wish.

It's mine.

"Star light, star bright,

first star I see tonight..."

Perrito!

"I wish I may, I wish I might

- have this wish..."
- Señor Horner!

Please don't make that wish. Please?

Please?

What are you doing?

Please...

Seriously, are you having
a hernia or something?

Pretty please...

They're such pools of vulnerability.

It's so cute

how you think that would work on me.

Don't you know I'm dead inside?

By the way, your nose is bleeding.

Oh.

I was just buying some time
for Team Friendship.

Team what?

Spanish Splinter!

Ow!

Hey!

What have you done? No!

The map. My wish.

Go, go, go!

It's mine.

You looking for something?

Consider this my resignation, mister.

What?

What did I do to deserve this?

I mean, what, specifically?

Gorgeous.

I hate to say it,
but should we make a wish?

Kitty, one life spent with you

is all that I could wish for.

You saved my life, sis.

You was gonna make the wish,
but you didn't make the wish

'cause you wanted to save your family.

And I was really scared.

And then...

Oi, don't get so blubbery about it.

Whose porridge would I eat otherwise?

I'm sorry you didn't get
your wish, Goldi, love.

But I did, Mama.

I did get my wish.

Everything

is just right.

Oh.

Oh, now you've made me cry.

Aw.

Now, what say we all go home
and hibernate?

Hey, Goldi, you are a chip
off the old block, you are.

Well, what can I say?

I won the orphan lottery.

Softpaws, Boots.

- Goldi.
- Bears.

Hey, Baby, you got any ideas
for our next job?

Oh! Remember that pie factory?

I suspect that they might be experiencing

a leadership vacuum.

Oh, family business.

Oh, how exciting.

Now's a good time to talk about
ethical business practices.

There's a talking cockroach on my nose!

- Get it off! Get off!
- Hold still.

Oh, no, no, wait just a second.

Ow! Hey! Hang on!

Hey, Perrito, about that name.

Let's pick one out for you.

Yeah. Oh, what about "Chiquito"?

Ah. "Chomper."

What do you think, Perrito?

"Chomper," no?

I got it, I got it.

How about "Jeff"?

- Jeff?
- Yeah.

He doesn't have a Jeff's face.

You know, if it's the same to you,

I think I'll just stick with "Perrito."

I kind of like it,

since that's what my friends call me.

Then "Perrito" it shall be.

You know, to be honest,
"Chomper" is pretty good.

Yeah, but no.

Well, we'll keep workshopping it.

I want this vacation to be perfect!

Did you remember to pack my captain's hat?

Yes, Governor.

And your captain's shoes,
your captain's coat

and your captain's pajamas.

And what about...

My boat!

Puss in Boots!

Perrito!

Team Friendship?

We did not agree to this.

Yeah, it makes us look ridiculous.

Too late now. It's official.

Seagull!

Steady as she goes, Perrito.

Dokey-doke.

Where are we headed, anyways?

Off to find new adventures

and to see some old friends.

Oh, you're still here?