All language subtitles for Greys Anatomy s19e05 When I Get to the Border.eng

♪

Meredith: When researchers
studied the way surgeons

make decisions in the OR,
they found newer surgeons

tend to rely on the standard
operating procedures

they learned in school.

I don't like this one.

You haven't even seen it.
Keep an open mind.

I did that in New York
and New Hampshire.

Brookline STEAM has
one of the best

science programs
in the country.

And, you know,
Harvard Medical School

is just right down
the street.

I want to stay in Seattle.
It was so much better there.

You said the kids
at SEA-TAC Science were snobby.

It wasn't that bad.

♪ I'm tryna make you move

Are you feeling worried?

Do you need to take
some deep breaths?

No, I just want
to go home.

This isn't a punishment.

You are an extremely
gifted child.

You are going to do great
in a school

where other kids
are as gifted as you.

And we can check out
the aquarium after.

Zola, we're in Boston.

You're signed up
to shadow.

Let's just check it out

so you can make
an informed decision.

To make sure I hate it.

If you hate it, you never
have to come back here again.

Okay?

Let's go.

♪ Make you move

It makes sense.

Newer surgeons have limited
experience to fall back on.

But seasoned surgeons
are more intuitive.

Addison: Uh-huh.

They mine from years
of practice

to make quick
and effective decisions.

What about in your
brown jacket?

Go look.

And put your dad on.

Instead of looking for
his lucky baseball card,

Henry could be
using this time

to actually study
for his math test.

Hey.
[ Chuckles ]

Oh, good.
Crisis averted.

Okay, babe,
I'll see you tomorrow.

I love you. Bye.

Sorry about that.

[ Chuckles ]
I'm all too familiar

with the "Mom, I can't find it"
emergencies.

Was it in
the brown jacket?

Of course it was
in the brown jacket.

[ Laughs ] We know where
everything is.

It's our mom superpower.

I mean, you'd think
they'd be more impressed that we're doctors.

Please.
Tuck couldn't care less.

But Cynthia is thrilled
we're coming.

Yeah, how do you know her,
again, med school?

Oh, no, college.
She was my first-year roommate.

Grew up in Chicago.

I thought she was
very cosmopolitan.

How'd she wind up
running a clinic in Pullman?

Uh,
her husband got a job

teaching music
at the university.

Oh.
She likes it?

Well, Pullman, Washington,
is no Chicago,

but she loves
running the clinic.

And she loves having
a couple of doctors

coming to volunteer
even more.

Patients from Idaho
have been flooding the place

ever since the state
restricted abortion.

[ Indistinct shouting ]
Okay, should be coming up here.

The more experience we have,
the less likely we are

to be thrown when
we encounter complications.

We can shift gears more easily
when it's needed.

Oh, come on!
[ Banging on van ]

[ Shouting continues ]

Whoa.

♪

Babies
don't choose abortion!

You're stopping
a beating heart!

Hey, you're terminating lives,
and you know it.

Just keep moving.
You're killing babies.

You're a baby killer
'cause abortion is murder!

And you took an oath
to do no harm!

You took an oath!

♪

[ Siren wailing in distance,
indistinct conversations ]

Hey.
How was the bus?

Fine, but I took it
for a reason.

I know.
I can't say good morning?

You did, right after
you woke me up

to make lunches
for Ellis and Bailey.

Hey, I really appreciate
you helping out while Meredith is out.

I worked three 16-hour days
in a row.

I'd just fallen asleep.

C-Can we not talk
about this here? [ Cellphone vibrates ]

Oh, I have
an epidural hematoma.

Can you take him
to daycare?

No, I have rounds.

I have an emergency.

I would ask any trusted intern
to do this,

and I assure you, they would be
more than happy

to help
the chief of neuro.

I will let them know
that you're coming.

Okay, bye, baby.

Uh...

Uh, where's--
So, where's daycare?

Okay.

Cynthia: Oh,
it's so good to see you.

So, how long has this clinic
been open?

45 years.

Last year, we provided
more than 2,000 patients

with birth control,
prenatal care,

abortion care,
STD testing,

cancer screening,
pizza parties.

Hm?

Come on.
Look outside, guys.

Let me at least
crack a joke.

Well, it seems like
there's plenty of demand.

Yeah, we added a construction
trailer when Roe was overturned,

and I moved our staff offices
and break room

so we could convert more space
for these exam rooms.

Smart.
Okay.

Cynthia also somehow fit
a full-size couch

in our dorm room,
and a mini fridge.

Yeah, well,
I can figure out space,

but without volunteers
like you,

coming from Seattle and Spokane,
I'd be sunk.

Alright.
Put us to work.

Okay, these are the patients
who are ready to be seen.

These are the patients
who have not been seen.

[ Chuckles ]
It's a low-tech operation,

but somehow it gets
the job done.

Okay.
Okay.

Have fun!

If that couch could talk...
Hey, hey.

[ Chuckles ]

Koracick: Is this where
the family reunion is happening?

And by "family,"
I mean my #workfamily.

You want a photo?
Let's get one. I don't, actually.

Good morning, Tom.
I see you haven't changed.

Well, you might want to stop
by ophthalmology, seventh floor,

east wing, because I've toned
the glutes and the abs. [ Scoffs ]

Wow.
No, Bostonians are noticing.

I haven't heard that.

Catherine, you look
radiant as ever.

[ Sighs ]
Shall we?

Where are you two going?

We got a little project.

You want to elaborate?

Oh, it's not
your business.

Well, I run the foundation,
so actually it is.

I'll loop you in
when the time is right.

Come on.

♪

Should I text you
to tell you I'm here?

Oh! Hey.

Hi.
Hey. What's going on?

Tell me everything.

[ Sighs ]
Can we go up to your office

so that I can have
my nervous breakdown in private?

♪

Okay, Jessica, uh, do you
have enough prenatal vitamins?

They're still free.

I could use more. Okay.

[ Chuckles ]

Okay, come back
in two weeks, yeah?

Um, great.

I made all my appointments
weeks ago.

It's too hard to get
in here otherwise.

Alright, take good care.

I loved my "measure and listen"
appointments

when I was pregnant
with Tuck.

My favorite part
about being an OB.

Mm-hmm.
So, what have you had so far?

Um, I did consults
with six women

who wanted
medication abortions.

I gave pills to five.
Did someone need a D&C?

They changed their mind.

We are making progress. Mm.

Progress is neither
swift nor easy. [ Groans ]

Marie Curie.
[ Chuckles ]

First woman to win
the Nobel Prize.

Think she knew what
she was talking about. Mm.

Scout: Dad-o.

Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got him,
I got him, I got him.

He's in there somewhere.

Dad-o.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm looking for him,

I'm looking for him.

Ah, here's Dad-o, here's Dad-o.

Aw, damn it.

C-Crap.

I mean, u-uh--
uh, whatever, whatever.

Sorry.

[ Elevator bell dings ]

♪

You getting out?

No. You?

Going down.

[ Sighs ]

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Wow.
He's Lincoln's.

And Shepherd's.
We know what's up.

I'm just dropping
him off at daycare.

Shepherd had an emergency
and needed a favor.

Wonder what other kinds
of favors he does for her.

What's that?

You going to the
lunch-and-learn today?

Dad-o.

Oh, my God,
he just called you Dad.

No, no, no.

It's h-his dino.

He-- He--
He can't say "dino."

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Alright.
Isn't the daycare two floors up?

Uh, stairs are
good exercise.

♪

[ Sighs ]

I miss paper.

Same.

Except, at least with e-records,
I can read my own notes.

[ Chuckles ]

I've got a 39-year-old with a
cesarean-scar ectopic pregnancy.

C-section scar?

Yes, the fetus can attach
to the scar on the uterine wall.

Her OB found it
on an ultrasound this morning.

He wouldn't remove it.
They're in Idaho.

It's a life-threatening case,
so there should be an exception.

There's cardiac activity.
He didn't want to take the risk.

The law is confusing.

Nobody wants to be the first one
to lose their license

or be charged
with a felony.

Alright. I'll see her.
Which room?

Across the border
in Moscow.

She called from the OB's
parking lot.

Also, her car won't start.

You wanted to help.

[ Sighs ]
I'll get the keys.

[ Chuckles ]

What do you mean
"panic attacks"?

You know, she gets dizzy,
her body shakes,

she has trouble breathing.

How often
is this happening?

Often enough.

I mean, her grades
are slipping.

She can't relate
to her friends.

Because she's scared
of Alzheimer's?

[ Sighs ]

I-I mean,
she's very bright,

and she's under-stimulated
at school, and her mind

goes in 17 different directions
at one time.

And she's very aware that Ellis
died of early-onset Alzheimer's.

And so of course
her mind goes there.

She's afraid that I will get it,
that Maggie will get it.

Alright.
So, how you handling it all?

Therapy or...

We go to therapy
once a week.

But it's not enough.

I mean, she has severe anxiety,
and I completely missed it.

She was always
my cheerful child.

I never had to worry
about her.

Right.
So you didn't.

[ Sighs ]

I just want to help her.

I just want
to comfort her.

I don't know what to do.
I am so exhausted.

I stay up every night,
just reading

pages and pages and pages
about Alzheimer's, thinking,

"Oh, if I cure Alzheimer's,
I can help Zola."

Ridiculous.

Makes absolutely
no sense.

It's ridiculous, I know, but
I just feel powerless and...

[ Sighs ]

...I hate that feeling.

What if it wasn't
ridiculous?

What?

What if you try to cure
Alzheimer's?

♪

[ Cellphone chimes ]
Addison: Henry.

Baseball emoji,
smiley face, sunflower.

I'm going to interpret that
as affection.

Bailey: [ Chuckles ]
Wait 'til he's a teenager

and you just get letters--

B-R-B...
Mm.

...I-D-K, and
the enigmatic K-K.

Why the two K's?

Tuck claims
it's more respectful.

But, you know,
what do I know?

I'm just his chauffeur.

Speaking of which,
I-I can take over driving.

I like to drive.

It's 20 minutes
to Moscow.

Never thought I'd have to drive
across state lines

to pick up a patient.

Hm.
Feels like we're on the lam.

The medical
Thelma and Louise.

Didn't they drive
off a cliff?

[ Snaps fingers ]
Bonnie and Clyde.

Shot to death.

Bailey and Addison?

American heroes.

[ Laughs ]

Is it okay if Kyle
picks her up after five?

I really appreciate it.

No, no, no, no.

I'll be fine.

Yeah.
You're doing plenty.

Oh, uh, they're here.

I gotta go.
Susan?

Dr. Montgomery?
Yes. That's me.

Thanks so much
for the ride.

I didn't realize the clinic was
such a full-service operation.

Well, Dr. Bailey
is also a surgeon.

Yeah, this is just
our side hustle.

Water?
Ah, yes. Thank you.

Seat belts.
[ Seat belt clicks ]

Are you sure no one needs
an assist in the O.R.?

Or... pit?

The square knot is
the foundation for all knots.

15 minutes a day
is a good investment in time.

Lucas: Damn it. Too loose. Ahhhh.

Yeah,
your guy's still bleeding.

Oh, I hope
that's not his face.

Or his liver.
Or his heart.

[ Cellphone chimes ]
9-1-1.

Oh, God forbid it's someone
who needs stitches. Something good?

I-I don't know yet.
The pit?

[ Chimes ]

Uh, yeah,
something like that.

You sure your son
hasn't got us figured out?

Did he seem
suspicious of you? How could he not be?

I'm a Greek sculptor's dream,
and you're only human.

Oh, please. No.

Sneaking around
with the boss's mom

is not gonna help
my performance review.

This is between
you and me.

Don't let Jackson
get all up in your head.

Oh, so, what you're saying is
we're gonna have to kill him.

Be serious, Tom.

Okay, fine.
I'll kill him myself.

But you-- you got to deal
with your husband.

Tom, could you just please
tell me about my scans?

It's not the news
we wanted.

So, the tumor is bigger?

Two millimeters.

Two millimeters?
That's nothing.

It's not "nothing."
It's growing.

How you feeling?
The same.

Mostly well.
Occasional pain.

Two millimeters
isn't worth this conversation.

Catherine, two months ago,
we did a scan

and we noted
your tumor had grown.

And?

And you said if it grew further,
you'd consider more treatment.

I know what I said.
And it grew.

Two millimeters.

Your son thinks you're still
in remission.

It's two millimeters!
It's not remission.

You need more treatment.

And you need to talk
to your husband and your son

and let them know
what's going on.

And you need to remember that
my name is on this building.

So I'll be the one
to decide what I need.

♪

I-I got a text about
Scout Lincoln.

Something about an accident?
Is he okay?

He's fine.
He's just wet.

Oh.

We used his backup clothes
last week,

and we never got new ones. Okay...

We tried his parents,
but they're both in surgery.

We had your information
from this morning.

[ Scoffs ] What?
So I'm supposed to...

A few parents have found clothes
at the gift shop.

I'm sure you don't want him
to be uncomfortable.

Susan: Tina's bringing Emily
home with Colette,

so you can pick her up there
after work.

I canceled
the piano lesson,

and can you pick up fruit snacks
and Pirate's Booty?

It's our week to bring
the snacks to soccer.

Martha said she'll come get me
when I'm done.

I'll be fine.

Love you, too. Bye.

What'd I do
with my keys?

I had them when you
picked me up, right?

I'm sorry.
I don't remember.

Don't be.

I'm usually ready
for anything,

but ectopic pregnancy
wasn't on my calendar.

It kinda threw me.

Totally understandable.

[ Laughter ]

Bracelets.

My daughter makes them.

Take one. Heck...

Take two, please.
Aww!

She's made enough for everyone
this side of the Mississippi.

But it keeps her busy when I'm
trying to get ready for work.

We get it.
We have kids.

How old's your daughter?

Five.
Aww.

She turns six next week.

Ooh, sweet. Ahh.

She only asked for, um,
one present--

a sister.

She's been calling
the baby Sundae

'cause she loves ice cream.

I can still get pregnant
after this, right?

It's hard for me to know without
doing further imaging tests.

But it is possible.

Ohh!

[ Dramatic music plays ]

Dr. Montgomery?

This is bad, right?

[ Breathing heavily ]

Ahh! Ahh! Ah!

IDH inhibitors, CDK inhibitors,
immune checkpoint inhibitors--

Please.
I'm not one for inhibition.

And historically I've
been grateful for that.

But these trials
have really--

I've already done
one of these.

And it helped.
It helped.

But it made me feel
like absolute hell.

I said I would consider
more treatment.

I did.
It's not what I want.

Okay, so don't do it for you,
hmm? Do it for me.

If you think about it,
you really owe me one.

I'm getting help, if that
makes you feel any better.

Mm?
I met a medicine man in Bali.

I met a shaman
in Peru.

I learned all about energy
medicine and frequency medicine,

medicines that don't make me
feel like I'm suffering.

T-That's because
they don't work.

According to you.

I have an acupuncturist
who's done more for my pain

than any pill
you ever prescribed.

And studies show that Reiki
will reduce pain

and it can improve
post-op recovery.

Catherine, please--
Tom, Tom, Tom.

I know you mean well.

And you've been
carrying my secret.

But this is my cancer.

Mm.

This is my choice.

[ Drawer opens ]

Jackson:
Ah. Got it.

This group of neuroscientists
from Brussels--

they applied for a grant
to expand their research

on the connection
between Alzheimer's and--

Gut microbial composition.
I've read studies on it.

There are also some
that link gut integrity

with brain plaque production
and neuro-inflammation.

I-I saw this all in
the Parkinson's research.

Of course.

You already know more than the
group who applied for the grant.

It's your areas of specialty--
gut and brain.

Yeah.
It's all theoretical.

Like you didn't just do
a record-breaking study

on Parkinson's
based on something that was

initially theoretical?

Come on.
You should do this.

We could help fund it.

And we got facilities,
equipment, tech.

We have this
amazing partnership

with MIT's brain science program.

They could be a resource.

You should just fund
the people from Brussels.

They're not you!

Meredith Grey studying the
disease that killed her mother?

That's a story
that would get funding,

and funding
is what cures diseases.

This is exciting.

What's-- What's going on?
Where'd you go?

Zola was miserable
this morning.

And I could never move to Boston
if she didn't want to.

I mean, she's been
through so much.

So much trauma.

She lost her birth family,
her birth country,

her father died,
I almost died.

You know, all of
that stuff is--

is just now coming
to the surface.

I really need
to focus on her.

Okay.
I hear you.

I love you both.

Not exactly gonna give up
on this entirely, okay?

Not just yet.

When did you become
so relentless?

[ Chuckles ]
When I took this job.

Dispatch: 9-1-1.
What's your emergency?

Bailey: Yes, this is
Dr. Miranda Bailey.

I have
a 39-year-old female

with a ruptured
ectopic pregnancy

on a cesarean scar.

She's alert and oriented,
but hemorrhaging.

Pulse is weak.
Abdomen is rigid and distended.

We are in a blue Grey-Sloan van
on Highway 270.

Can you send an ambulance?

On its way.
Thank you.

How's it going
back there?

We're okay.

Doing okay, Susan.
[ Whimpering ]

What are you looking for?

Uterine balloon tamponade?

Not gonna find one
in there.

My OB just said
I was okay.

Well, it's difficult
to predict

if or when an ectopic pregnancy
will rupture, Susan.

This looks like
a lot of blood.

Is-- Is this
a lot of blood?

The pregnancy invaded
the muscle layers

and likely tore open
the uterine incision,

which is why we have to--
Ha!

What is that?
A Foley catheter.

If I insert this into
your vagina and inflate it,

the pressure against your uterus
will slow the bleeding.

Is that okay?
Is it safe?

It's safer than letting you
keep bleeding.

Y-Yeah.
Okay, do it.

Just-- ohh!--
make it stop.

Okay. I'm inserting it.

Okay.
Try to hold still.

Bailey,
no sudden moves.

Could I have prevented this
if I didn't get the C-section?

You didn't do anything wrong.
C-sections are safe.

This kind of ectopic pregnancy
is extremely rare.

You doing okay?
Uh-huh.

Okay, I'm gonna inflate
the balloon now.

You're gonna feel
a little bit of pressure.

Hold still.
You got it.

Okay.

That should buy us
a little bit of time.

[ Crying ]

And how much time?

[ Dramatic music plays ]

It's okay.
[ Horns honking ]

[ Breathing heavily ]

Clerk: Do you want a bag?
No, I'm good.

Simone: Oh, good luck with that.
I asked Schmitt for a day off.

He looked at me like
I killed his dog.

Uh, a bag, bag-- I need a bag.
Oh, hey, Skywalker!

Hey.
W-What are you, uh, doing here?

Getting snacks.

Apparently the vending machine
is too lowbrow for Dr. Kwan.

Yogurt-covered pretzels?
I need brain food.

Cashews and almonds.

Ah, is that what powers
that ego?

What are you doing?

Uh, s-same.
$32.75.

Wow.
That is a lot of snacks.

I, uh... Geez.

I forgot my wallet
in my locker.

I'll spot you,
but I get your next appy.

Hey, that's my--
Ooh, ooh, ooh.

Wow.

I may be wrong, but I think
these are a little too small.

They're not for me.
They're for the--

Let me guess.
[ Cellphone chimes ]

Daddy Daycare?

[ Chuckles ]
Oh, Schmitt. Oh, Schmitt.

It's okay.

I'll let him know that
you have child care issues.

Should I get
another bag, or...

Yeah, and you were
interested in neuro,

and you set that aside
for Derek.

Oh, it was a bit more
complicated than that.

Like how hard it was to choose
general surgery

because of Ellis?

I wish I could make one decision
in my life

where people didn't bring
Ellis into it.

A couple years ago,

I actually got to spend
some time with my father.

Realized my entire life
he had loomed so large.

He was this...
mountain of a man.

And I spend some time with him,
I realize he's just some guy.

With wasted potential
and regrets and flaws.

You didn't want to be
like him.

The scary part is,
I wasn't that different.

I mean, I was living
in cruise control, you know?

I wasn't fulfilling
my potential.

Feeling that similarity
to him was painful.

But it also
propelled me forward.

I mean,
I'm happier here,

doing something
I'm passionate about.

Maybe it's not an accident
that you're up all night

researching Alzheimer's.

Or you're feeling so much pain
about Zola.

Maybe it's all these pieces
of your life coming together.

I kinda think you're having
a breakthrough

rather than a breakdown.

Relentless.
No.

I'm just being a friend, alright?

I've seen you push through
so many things before

and ignore them.

I'm just saying that
this might be something

you don't want
to push through.

I think you should let it
help you grow.

Once upon a time,
I did want to cure Alzheimer's.

Exactly.
But what if it fails?

Oh, it's probably gonna fail.
[ Chuckles ] Right.

But, I mean, you could
definitely move the needle.

That means something.

Zola sees that her mom
is doing everything she can

to cure Alzheimer's.

I mean,
that's pretty amazing.

♪

[ Horns honking ]

Do you see an accident?

An ambulance?

No. Nothing.

How much longer will
the catheter hold?

Not sure.

Susan?
[ Groans lightly ]

Susan,
stay with me, hey?

Okay?
Talk to me.

Tell me, um--

Tell me about
Emily's birthday party.

It's a spa party.
[ Chuckles ]

I don't know where
she got the idea.

But her teenaged cousins
are coming to--

to paint
the kids' nails.

And she--
she wants a coffee cake.

Like the kind from school.

Ah.
I-- I haven't baked it yet.

I need to be okay.

I need to bake her cake.

I want to see her
turn six.

[ Voice breaking ] I want to see
her lose her front teeth

and learn how to read.

I-- I want to teach her
how to drive

and send her off to prom.

I want to drop her off
at college

and miss her every day
'til she comes home for summer.

I-- I want to--

I want to-- want to watch
her f-fall in love.

I w-- I want to see her
start her first real job.

I want to be there
for all of it.

Okay?

[ Sobbing ]

I'm not ready to go.
I'm not...

[ Groans ]

Susan?

Susan!

What?
I can't feel a pulse.

I'm starting CPR.

I'm pulling over.

[ Horn honks ]
Dispatch: 9-1-1. What's your emergency?

This is Dr. Miranda Bailey
calling again

about a patient hemorrhaging

from a ruptured ectopic
pregnancy on Highway 270.

She's coding.
We're starting CPR.

We need immediate help!

We dispatched an ambulance, but
there's a significant accident.

Road is stopped
in both directions.

Hopefully we'll be there soon.

♪ What's gonna leave?

♪ What's gonna stay?
[ Horn honking ]

♪ It's gotten hard for me
to recognize myself ♪

♪ Think I was born
in this disguise ♪

♪ Staring down at the hand
that I've been dealt ♪

♪ Trying to see through
different eyes ♪

She's bleeding
into her abdomen.

She's in
hypovolemic shock.

The compressions
won't do anything

without giving her
more blood.

If I stop,
her heart stops.

She has no pulse.

I'm not stopping.

Addison.

She's gone.
No. No.

Addison.

♪ What a time, what a time,
what a time ♪

♪ What a time, what a time,
what a time ♪

♪ Mm, mm, mm, mm

♪ Mm, mm, mm

♪ Ooh

[ Sniffles ]

Time of death, 13:34.

♪ Ooh ooh

♪ Mm, mm, mm, mm
[ Siren wailing in distance ]

Koracick: That stuff
keep you up at night?

Catherine: Herbal tea.
No caffeine.

Ah, I meant consistently lying
to your friends and family.

Tom, I thought we were done
with this conversation.

Well, persistence
is part of my charm.

Y-You can't fault me
for trying.

My friend's life
is at stake.

[ Sighs ] I spent the last
six months traveling abroad.

And everywhere I went,
all I thought was,

"Thank God
I'm not in an oncology ward."

If I stay the course
without chemo,

I'll have a few
good years left.

I want to spend them living.

If the cancer gets
more aggressive,

if there's some promising
new option,

maybe
I'll change my mind.

But if I'm gonna be stuck
in a hospital,

I want it to be as a doctor,
not as a patient.

[ Sighs ]
At some point,

everyone's gonna know
you lied, hmm?

How-- How about we just
let Jackson in on it--

No.
Okay, Richard?

Tom, this conversation with you
is exhausting enough.

I'm not gonna have it
with anyone else.

I am lying to protect my privacy
and to protect my peace.

I'm happy
with this decision.

You know what?
I'm not even gonna ask. Oh.

Nothing to know.

How about if you're ready to go?
Can I ask that?

What, you--
you cutting out early? Harriet has ballet.

I told her she could just wait
for the recital, but--

Wait?
Child, please.

I'm here.
Let's go.

I don't want
to miss anything.

♪

Dr. Kwan,
have you seen Adams?

Uh, last I saw him,
he was at the gift shop...

buying clothes
for your son.

Don't worry.
Your secret's safe.

Oh. You know?

[ Chuckling ] About you two?
It's pretty obvious.

Is it?
Yeah, when you see you together.

You know, it might be
less obvious

if you gave the rest of us
some more neuro cases.

Do you have a special interest
in neuro, Dr. Kwan?

I have a special interest
in gaining

as much experience
as I can

before I declare an area
of special interest.

I also have
steady hands.

And many skills
in other areas

if your interests are... expansive.

[ Elevator bell dings ]

You think I'm playing favorites
with Lucas because he's--

Dr. Shepherd,
I need a consult.

Is there supposed to be
a patient?

I got to tell you something. Okay.

Oh, hey, I'm glad
you finally told

the other interns about us,
by the way.

They think we're together.

Together like...
dating?

[ Chuckles ]

M-More like
sleeping together.

[ Scoffs ]
What? H-How?

W-Why? W-Why?

Why?
I-I don't know.

They assume things.

W-- Did you tell them
that they're wrong?

Lucas! You have to tell them!
Oh, my God!

Kwan was just
offering me sexual favors

in exchange for surgeries!
Wh--

I might throw up.

Oh, b-but I just--

No, no, no.
There's no "but."

You have no idea how fast
rumors spread around here.

[ Whispering ]
I don't want people thinking that I am dating my nephew.

Just sleeping together.

Stop saying that!

Just-- Ugh!

Fix it!

♪

[ Indistinct conversations,
laughter ]

♪ Six feet

How long
has it been going?

32 seconds.

Maybe we'll get
to a minute!

♪ It's just like the one that
you showed me in Oakland ♪

♪ Thought you were joking, but
I shoulda seen it comin' to me ♪

Hey.
Hi.

This looks so cool.
It's a gyroscope.

The spinning wheel is creating
angular momentum,

and it's going so fast.

When you apply force,
it changes momentum

in multiple directions,
not just linear.

That's what keeps it upright.
It's physics.

It certainly is.

♪ And it still keeps me up
at night ♪ [ Laughter ]

Woman: Sonata.

My mom's here.
We've gotta go.

Bye, Zola.
Hope we see you again.

Bye, Matisse.
Bye, Sonata.

Meredith: Bye-bye.

♪ Barely on my mind

♪ Sinkin' in your teeth

♪ Actin' like you're sweet,
car crash ♪

They seem so nice.

How was it?
Eh, it was okay.

Just okay, huh?

Can we go
to the aquarium now?

Yes.
Are you hungry?

♪ It's barely on my mind

[ Radio chatter ]

Excuse me.
They said you're her doctors.

Uh,
we treated her today.

I'm looking
for records, scans,

anything that might help
with the report.

Well, you're gonna have
to talk to her OB in Idaho.

And while you're at it,
you might want to ask him

why he refused
to treat her.

He was following
the law.

Just like this gentleman
is doing.

Right.
No. You're right.

It's the lawmakers.

They should actually be made
to come out here.

Yeah.

Have a look at the carnage
they've caused,

take a look
at all the blood.

I mean, how are we supposed
to be doctors?

How are we supposed
to treat patients?

We're hamstrung by laws
that are written by people

that are so far away
from this.

I have a medical degree.

I have decades of experience
treating pregnancies.

What-- What experience
do they have?

Why do they get to decide?

No.
It's wrong!

And it's infuriating!

I am infuriated, okay?!

Women's lives
are on the line!

And our hands...

that are trained
to help them...

our hands are tied.

It's...

[ Radio chatter ]

♪

[ Sighs ]

They want us to stick around
a little longer.

In case we need to answer
more questions.

We've answered everything. Twice.

I know.

But they're about to tell
a husband he's lost his wife.

And then he's gonna need to tell
his child she's lost her mom.

I would like to be here
for that.

[ Sighs ]

If this is the future,
it's bleak.

You know, I've always supported
the right to choose.

But I-- just,
you know, personally,

I...believed it wasn't
the choice for me.

But then I got pregnant.

A girl.

Then I miscarried.

Oh, Miranda.
I'm so sorry.

And to add insult to injury,
the miscarriage was incomplete.

So I needed a procedure
to prevent infection.

Now, I did not choose
an abortion.

But I've had a D&C.

It is
the same procedure.

And I'm worried
doctors are afraid to use it.

I'm-- I'm worried
the next generation

won't get enough
training on it.

I'm-- I'm worried
that is our future.

I want to offer it
at Grey-Sloan.

Train anyone who wants it.
I-I--

I want to prepare health care
professionals to help.

That's an excellent plan.
Yeah, I know.

And it won't be
nearly enough.

♪

[ Indistinct page over P.A. ]

You take care of business?

No.
I, um--

Lucas. It's your mess.
Clean it up.

W--mess?

D-Do you know why all the
interns think we're a couple?

Y-Y-You follow me
into on-call rooms.

You hover over me
with apartment listings.

You got me on Daddy Daycare
with Scout.

I asked you for help
with one thing--

don't blow my cover
at work.

And you've refused
to do it.

So...

that makes it okay
to tell people

that we're sleeping
together?

[ Scoffs ] I didn't tell
anybody anything.

It is not my job to correct
people's misconceptions.

Yes, it is.
You are an intern.

I am an attending.

There are rules about
these things for a reason.

[ Chuckles ]
We're not actually together!

They don't know that.

You know, all my life,
everyone's always assumed

I only get anywhere because
of my family connections.

And all my life,

I've been my family's
biggest disappointment.

[ Chuckling ] I hav--
I haven't lived up

to anybody's expectations
as a Shepherd.

So I thought I'd see
what happens when I'm not one.

But now, thanks to your lack
of discretion,

everyone believes
we're connected,

just in
a-a different way--

a way that is
admittedly disturbing,

but for this
particular purpose,

better.

You have three days.

And then if you haven't
told them, I will.

♪

So, when does
the clinic open?

A couple of days.

I'm already thinking
of how to expand.

I want to do more, too.

I, uh...

I have to do more.

You will.
From L.A.

No. No.

I want to-- I want to go
to places where people need me.

Places like Pullman,
you know?

I mean,
I can't just sit.

I have a unique set of skills.
I know I can make a difference.

I...

Guess I just need
to look at a map.

Southern Illinois.

It's right near Missouri, Arkansas,

Tennessee, Kentucky, Mississippi...

All states that have
abortion bans.

They're expecting
up to 14,000 women

to cross state lines
for care.

Yeah?
How do you know that?

'Cause I thought about
doing it, too.

But I got the baby girl
who recently lost her father.

So, she needs me at home.

But you, though,
you-- you go.

You go and give more women
access to care.

I just...

[ Voice breaking ] Susan.
It's just...

Wh-- N--
Okay. Stop.

You know you did everything
you could for her

under the circumstances.

No, you, y--

You needed the right tools,
the right supplies.

You needed an ultrasound.

You needed...

What?

The PRT.

Huh?

No. Okay.
So, my husband--

he-- he convinced
the fire department

that he needed this O.R.
on wheels, but it...

Okay, the city
sidelined it.

So we helped fund it,
and now it--

it just sits in the motor pool
collecting dust.

Oh, I can think of
a much better use for it.

You said
you liked driving.

Come on.

Meredith: With enough practice,
surgeons learn how and when

to pivot from standard
operating procedures.

Well, do you like it,
the lobster roll?

Mm-hmm.

Did you know lobsters
can be yellow or blue?

It just depends
on their pigment protein.

Mm.

Did you learn that
at the aquarium?

Brookline STEAM has
a marine science lab. Right.

Experience gives us
more context to know

when we need
a different approach.

It gives us more options
to help our patients.

I saw you laughing.

I saw you making friends.

Why don't you
like it there?

What if we move and I
still have panic attacks?

Or I fail school?

You will not fail.

And we are going to continue
the therapy.

We'll have left Seattle
for nothing.

And you'll have given up
your job.

Zola, let me worry
about that.

That's my job.

You run a hospital.
People depend on you.

What if I told you
Uncle Jackson offered me a job

here in Boston,

working on a cure
for Alzheimer's?

♪ We're golden

What if...

What if I decide
I don't want to be a doctor?

That's completely fine.

Really?
You wouldn't be disappointed?

Not at all.

You are so intelligent
and so creative.

You are going to make your mark
no matter what you do.

You think so?

I know so.

You have always been and
will always be extraordinary.

♪ A new day has just begun

So,
is it Brookline STEAM?

Mom...

I love it here.

I want to sign up
for robotics team.

They do this competition
at MIT,

and last year
they won first place.

And I want to be
in the orchestra.

Can I please take
cello lessons when we move?

You can.

You can take cello lessons
when we move.

One-size-fits-all solutions
don't always work.

[ Laughs ]

Every patient is different.

Just like every person
is different.

♪ And we're only

We each have various factors
to consider

when facing life's
big decisions.

♪ And we're only,
we're only at the start ♪

So we gather the facts.

We analyze the options.

♪

And we use our knowledge
and experience...

♪ And we're only,
we're only at the start ♪

♪ A new day is dawning

♪ Oh, a new day has just begun

♪ I got hope here in my heart

...to make the choices
that are right for us.

♪ And we're only,
we're only at the start ♪

♪

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