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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:28,487 --> 00:00:30,031 Hey, one, two, three 2 00:00:35,161 --> 00:00:38,372 Now, red solo cup is the best receptacle 3 00:00:38,497 --> 00:00:41,250 for barbecues, tailgates, fairs and festivals 4 00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:44,003 and you, sir, do not have a pair of testicles 5 00:00:44,128 --> 00:00:47,256 if you prefer drinking from glass, whoo 6 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:49,884 red solo cup 7 00:00:50,009 --> 00:00:51,636 I fill you up 8 00:00:51,761 --> 00:00:54,055 let's have a party 9 00:00:55,097 --> 00:00:57,600 let's have a party 10 00:00:57,725 --> 00:01:00,519 I love you, red solo cup 11 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:03,356 I lift you up 12 00:01:03,481 --> 00:01:09,278 proceed to party, proceed to party 13 00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:13,032 now, ireally love how you're easy to stack 14 00:01:13,157 --> 00:01:15,826 but I really hate how you're easy to crack 15 00:01:15,952 --> 00:01:18,788 'cause when beer runs down the front of my back 16 00:01:18,913 --> 00:01:21,791 well, that, my friends is quite yucky 17 00:01:21,916 --> 00:01:24,502 but I have to admit that the ladies get smitten 18 00:01:24,627 --> 00:01:26,337 admiring how sharply 19 00:01:26,462 --> 00:01:28,047 my first name is written 20 00:01:28,172 --> 00:01:30,341 on you with a sharpie when I get to hitting 21 00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:33,594 on them to help me get lucky 22 00:01:33,678 --> 00:01:35,179 red solo cup 23 00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:38,057 I fill you up 24 00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:40,977 let's have a party 25 00:01:41,102 --> 00:01:45,273 proceed to party 26 00:01:46,857 --> 00:01:49,402 Solo cup 27 00:01:49,527 --> 00:01:52,571 solo cup 28 00:01:52,697 --> 00:01:55,449 solo cup 29 00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:58,369 solo cup ah, ooh, doodle, da, doo 30 00:01:58,494 --> 00:02:01,289 solo cup 31 00:02:01,414 --> 00:02:04,333 solo cup de, dum, dum 32 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:07,003 solo cup ooh, de, da, bah 33 00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:21,183 The potential in this room is astounding. 34 00:02:21,392 --> 00:02:23,769 I love the potential. Hundred percent. 35 00:02:23,978 --> 00:02:25,498 It's a world of infinite possibilities. 36 00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,315 Infinite. Hundred percent. 37 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,817 How many "y"s do I put in "hey" at this time of night? 38 00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:31,319 Is it before 2:00 am? Yeah. 39 00:02:31,444 --> 00:02:32,778 Two "y" s. Okay. 40 00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:34,947 Three is thirsty. Thirsty. 41 00:02:35,072 --> 00:02:37,033 And one is curt. 42 00:02:37,158 --> 00:02:38,510 You know what I was thinking about? 43 00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:40,077 Cookie dough became so popular. 44 00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:42,442 It's 'cause it's not finished. It could still be anything. 45 00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:43,748 Hundred percent. 46 00:02:43,873 --> 00:02:45,559 Making cookies out of cookie dough is just a suggestion. 47 00:02:45,583 --> 00:02:46,810 Hundred percent. That's what they say 48 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,336 you could do with it. Right. 49 00:02:48,461 --> 00:02:51,005 And the same thing, like dating someone for more than a month. 50 00:02:51,130 --> 00:02:53,090 It's just a serving suggestion. 51 00:02:53,174 --> 00:02:54,342 Hundred percent. 52 00:02:54,425 --> 00:02:56,153 "Kara question Mark." That means I don't remember 53 00:02:56,177 --> 00:02:57,511 where I met her. Okay. 54 00:02:57,636 --> 00:02:59,281 But it's a question Mark with an exclamation point, 55 00:02:59,305 --> 00:03:00,825 which means I should want to follow up. 56 00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:02,367 Let's see what the options are first though. 57 00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:05,061 Yes. Exactly that. That's the world that we're living in. 58 00:03:05,186 --> 00:03:07,480 You can just see what the options are for anything. 59 00:03:07,605 --> 00:03:08,689 Like with travel. 60 00:03:08,773 --> 00:03:10,459 You're not gonna just pick the first flight you see. 61 00:03:10,483 --> 00:03:11,626 You want to see all the flights. 62 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:12,735 Yeah. That's a good thing. 63 00:03:12,818 --> 00:03:13,962 You get the best flight that way. 64 00:03:13,986 --> 00:03:15,946 Why wouldn't you get the best person 65 00:03:16,072 --> 00:03:17,424 by looking at all the potential people? 66 00:03:17,448 --> 00:03:19,259 And how could you even expect to find one person 67 00:03:19,283 --> 00:03:20,951 who could fulfill all of your needs? 68 00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:24,497 It's easier just to find the most supportive person here. 69 00:03:24,580 --> 00:03:26,248 The funniest person here. Right. 70 00:03:26,332 --> 00:03:27,541 The best sex here. Right. 71 00:03:27,625 --> 00:03:28,667 The best advice here. 72 00:03:28,751 --> 00:03:30,294 The second-best sex here. 73 00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:31,379 Hundred percent. 74 00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:32,731 I don't ever want to go past 75 00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:34,608 Knowing what someone's parents do for a living. 76 00:03:34,632 --> 00:03:36,193 If I know what someone's parents do for a living... 77 00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:38,010 Right. Right. I've hung too long. 78 00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:39,136 Or, like, siblings. 79 00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:41,700 Like, why does anyone want to know about your siblings? 80 00:03:41,764 --> 00:03:43,533 Yeah. Especially so early. "How many siblings..." 81 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,660 Has that ever changed whether you want to date somebody? 82 00:03:45,684 --> 00:03:46,953 It's like, "I have two sisters and a brother." 83 00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:48,121 Hold on. Well, I'm out of here. 84 00:03:48,145 --> 00:03:49,373 I'm out of here. You know what I say? 85 00:03:49,397 --> 00:03:51,208 I only date only children or the oldest of three. 86 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,818 They say, "exercise your options." It's like a muscle. 87 00:03:53,943 --> 00:03:55,986 Options are like a muscle. Yeah. 88 00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:59,156 Some people are weak and atrophied, and they don't understand 89 00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:00,908 how to exercise their options. Yeah. 90 00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:04,412 My options are burly and strong and turgid. 91 00:04:04,495 --> 00:04:05,621 Hundred percent. 92 00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:08,416 People say guys like us are afraid of commitment. 93 00:04:08,499 --> 00:04:10,310 No. We're afraid of commitment 94 00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:11,752 to something we can't get out of. 95 00:04:11,836 --> 00:04:13,522 There's no such thing as fear of commitment. 96 00:04:13,546 --> 00:04:15,589 Fear of commitment is fear of regret. 97 00:04:15,673 --> 00:04:17,842 Hundred percent. Or fear of intimacy. 98 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,969 Please, I'm intimate with everybody. 99 00:04:20,094 --> 00:04:22,221 Do you ever wonder, 100 00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:25,099 if you did find something deeper with somebody, 101 00:04:25,182 --> 00:04:27,435 if that would somehow be more meaningful? 102 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:29,145 I do, sometimes. 103 00:04:29,228 --> 00:04:32,231 Like right now, I'm casually dating, like, six or seven different women. 104 00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,483 But I do wonder, deep down, what it would be like 105 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,861 to seriously date two or three. 106 00:04:37,403 --> 00:04:39,321 Even when I don't understand you, 107 00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:41,699 I understand you better than I understand anybody. 108 00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:43,802 - Hundred percent. - I love when we hang out. 109 00:04:43,826 --> 00:04:45,828 This is like, if someone were recording this, 110 00:04:45,911 --> 00:04:47,329 that's what my podcast should be. 111 00:04:47,413 --> 00:04:49,498 There should be, like, the sound of a stand-up bass 112 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,000 playing under me right now. 113 00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:53,878 Okay, I got one. 114 00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:55,588 "Brunette random house party." 115 00:04:55,671 --> 00:04:57,089 "Random house," the publisher? 116 00:04:57,173 --> 00:04:59,800 Or "random house," like a random house party? 117 00:05:01,427 --> 00:05:03,012 Oh, "Emily vogue." 118 00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:04,906 I'm gonna go with "Kara question Mark" 119 00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:06,992 'cause I feel like letting the universe surprise me tonight. 120 00:05:07,016 --> 00:05:09,143 What a time to be alive. Hundred percent. 121 00:05:09,268 --> 00:05:11,037 Hundred percent. Hundred percent. Hundred percent. 122 00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:12,480 Hundred percent. Hundred percent. 123 00:05:14,565 --> 00:05:16,484 - I figured it out. - Figured what out? 124 00:05:17,193 --> 00:05:18,194 America. 125 00:05:18,736 --> 00:05:20,654 Okay. I know you're laughing, 126 00:05:20,738 --> 00:05:22,382 but I have a pitch you're really gonna like. 127 00:05:22,406 --> 00:05:23,657 America is divided, 128 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:25,840 but it's not for the reason that we think. 129 00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:28,954 We think that america's divided by geography, 130 00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:32,291 red state, blue state, city, country. 131 00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:34,585 We're missing something far more profound. 132 00:05:34,710 --> 00:05:36,378 America isn't divided by space. 133 00:05:36,462 --> 00:05:38,172 America is divided by time. 134 00:05:38,631 --> 00:05:40,883 We don't live in the moment anymore. And why would we, 135 00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:43,511 when we can live in any moment that's ever been recorded? 136 00:05:43,594 --> 00:05:45,846 And when we experience something we really love, 137 00:05:45,930 --> 00:05:48,682 our overwhelming instinct is to somehow file it away for later. 138 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:49,850 That's interesting. 139 00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:51,685 We don't watch movies in the theater. 140 00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:53,604 We don't watch TV when it airs. 141 00:05:53,729 --> 00:05:57,024 We don't even have conversations at the same time 142 00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:58,275 because we text. 143 00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:00,069 And when you text, I can say, "hi," 144 00:06:00,152 --> 00:06:02,112 and you can say "hi" back in a second, 145 00:06:02,238 --> 00:06:03,864 or a minute. Or never. 146 00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:06,116 Or never 'cause it's you 147 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,702 and you're too busy producing the biggest podcast in america, 148 00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,680 which is kind of my point because we're all living 149 00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:13,165 in our own individualized times. 150 00:06:13,249 --> 00:06:15,459 That's why we're living in divided times. 151 00:06:15,543 --> 00:06:17,086 That's... I like that. 152 00:06:17,169 --> 00:06:18,546 You like that? Ooh! Yeah. 153 00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:20,798 So, what do you think? Do you think that's a story? 154 00:06:22,299 --> 00:06:23,509 It's a theory. 155 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:25,512 A theory is a story. No, a theory is not a story. 156 00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:28,430 Yes, it is when it's about an idea. And america is an idea. 157 00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:30,057 That's what makes it so great. 158 00:06:30,182 --> 00:06:32,309 So, if you're... No, america is its people. 159 00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:34,103 That's what makes it so fucked up. 160 00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:38,524 Hey. Not every white guy in New York needs to have a podcast. 161 00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:40,859 You have the verified check Mark. 162 00:06:40,985 --> 00:06:43,737 You got the new yorker position. I want something more. 163 00:06:43,821 --> 00:06:47,616 I don't just want to be a writer. I want to be a voice. 164 00:06:48,284 --> 00:06:50,911 As dorky as it sounds, I care about america. 165 00:06:50,995 --> 00:06:52,913 And not in that faded Lana del Rey way. 166 00:06:52,997 --> 00:06:54,415 And now I see it falling apart, 167 00:06:54,498 --> 00:06:57,835 and we're just standing in the corner, like, making fun of it, you know? 168 00:06:57,918 --> 00:07:02,339 I'd like to try to tell some story that connects. 169 00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:05,759 Okay, okay. Well, then, let me help you connect. 170 00:07:05,884 --> 00:07:09,221 With all your ideas about america, even if they're good, right, 171 00:07:09,305 --> 00:07:13,350 you gotta put 'em in a story 'cause Americans listen to stories. 172 00:07:13,434 --> 00:07:17,187 'Cause Americans are people. They're not ideas. 173 00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:20,232 You're here. Yeah. 174 00:07:20,649 --> 00:07:21,900 You need to be here. 175 00:07:22,276 --> 00:07:23,694 Does that make sense? 176 00:07:24,612 --> 00:07:25,654 Hundred percent. 177 00:07:27,990 --> 00:07:31,118 I'm Robin Dillon, and this is American moment. 178 00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,622 To the organizers of the western Montana fly-fishing... 179 00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:56,226 Hey. 180 00:07:56,352 --> 00:07:57,519 You changed your hair. 181 00:07:57,645 --> 00:07:59,271 Yeah, you noticed. Of course. 182 00:07:59,355 --> 00:08:00,731 How's the book world? 183 00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:02,316 The what? 184 00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,026 Nothing. Can I get you a drink? 185 00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,194 Yes. Great. 186 00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:06,904 Um, what can I make you? 187 00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:09,031 Um, can you do, like, a white wine? 188 00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:12,201 Um, sure. I have to open a bottle for that. 189 00:08:12,284 --> 00:08:14,787 Oh, that's okay. Open it. I only want, like, one glass. 190 00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,021 Hello? Ben? 191 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,484 Yeah. Hello? 192 00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:49,029 This is the worst phone call you're ever gonna get in your life. 193 00:08:50,489 --> 00:08:51,699 Oh, my god. 194 00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,411 Your girlfriend's dead. 195 00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:58,664 I'm sorry. What did you say? 196 00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:00,541 She's dead. 197 00:09:01,166 --> 00:09:02,751 No, no, the first part. 198 00:09:02,835 --> 00:09:03,919 Your girlfriend. 199 00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:07,089 Yeah, I'm sorry. Hey, I don't understand. 200 00:09:07,548 --> 00:09:09,174 I know. I know, I know. 201 00:09:09,258 --> 00:09:10,843 We can't make no sense of it either. 202 00:09:11,343 --> 00:09:12,553 Who is this? 203 00:09:13,721 --> 00:09:16,390 This is Ty Shaw. Abby's brother. 204 00:09:17,099 --> 00:09:20,310 Um, hey, I don't really know what to say. 205 00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:23,897 I know this must be so hard to process. I'm so sorry. 206 00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:26,525 Abby told us so much about you. 207 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,612 Oh, my god. 208 00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:35,409 Who's Abby? 209 00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:37,077 Some girl. 210 00:09:37,161 --> 00:09:39,079 Who's that? Somem 211 00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:42,249 we definitely hung out a few times. 212 00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:44,126 I wouldn't have... 213 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,502 Funeral's Sunday. 214 00:09:46,170 --> 00:09:47,337 Oh, my god. I'm... 215 00:09:47,463 --> 00:09:49,256 Can you tell me where I can send flowers? 216 00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:51,884 There's no need to send flowers, Ben. 217 00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:54,470 No, no, no, no, no. I'm absolutely gonna send flowers. 218 00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:57,139 Just, you tell me the address. See if you can text it to me. 219 00:09:57,222 --> 00:09:59,558 If you really want, there's a flower shop by the airport. 220 00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:02,227 We 'ii just swing by there when I pick you up. 221 00:10:02,770 --> 00:10:04,104 When you pick me up? 222 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:09,234 Uh, hey. I will be there in spirit. 223 00:10:09,318 --> 00:10:12,029 Spiritairlines. Right, man. That's a great choice. 224 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,947 You just let me know what flight. 225 00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:18,452 This is just... 226 00:10:18,577 --> 00:10:19,703 I can't do this. 227 00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:21,246 None of us can do this. 228 00:10:21,330 --> 00:10:22,498 Not alone. 229 00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:26,794 Y'all had your whole future ahead of you. 230 00:10:26,919 --> 00:10:28,128 Okay. 231 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:29,671 Okay, don't cry. 232 00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:33,008 I mean, no, cry. Cry. 233 00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,718 Of course. Oh, god. 234 00:10:34,843 --> 00:10:36,428 Be in touch with your emotions. 235 00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:39,097 I can't believe we have to go through this. 236 00:10:39,181 --> 00:10:40,766 Okay. All right. Hey. 237 00:10:41,767 --> 00:10:43,727 Remind me where you guys are exactly. 238 00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:46,939 Well, you've been to Texas before? 239 00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:51,360 Texas. 240 00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:54,279 Okay, are you near Austin? 241 00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:58,242 No, we're not near Austin. 242 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:00,953 Dallas? Dallas ain't Texas. 243 00:11:02,454 --> 00:11:04,873 Houston? Houston's another country. 244 00:11:04,957 --> 00:11:07,376 Why don't you just tell me where... 245 00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:09,711 Have you heard of abilene? The city. 246 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,089 Never heard of abilene, no. 247 00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,842 Well, abilene is about three hours from Dallas. 248 00:11:14,967 --> 00:11:16,468 Okay. 249 00:11:16,552 --> 00:11:18,387 And we're five hours from abilene. 250 00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:29,439 Ladies and gentlemen... 251 00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,652 Hey. Hi. 252 00:11:51,879 --> 00:11:54,756 And while she could be quite a handful when she was a girl... 253 00:11:59,177 --> 00:12:02,264 I can't believe I'm talking about my daughter in the past tense. 254 00:12:08,854 --> 00:12:10,272 She was living in New York. 255 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,358 She was finding her voice in music. 256 00:12:13,984 --> 00:12:16,778 And she finally found love. 257 00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:19,823 Ben manalowitz. 258 00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:24,119 A successful writer and a regular contributor to New York magazine. 259 00:12:24,202 --> 00:12:25,245 The new yorker. 260 00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:27,331 But even with all his success, 261 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:29,958 he always respected our girl for who she was. 262 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:34,338 "Mama," she said, "you know how he has me saved in his phone? 263 00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:36,298 Texasfi 264 00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:39,468 well, as short as her life was, 265 00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:41,887 she found her voice, 266 00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:43,472 and she found love. 267 00:12:45,057 --> 00:12:46,725 And that's all there is, right? 268 00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:04,493 Let's hear from Ben. 269 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:06,036 - Go ahead. - Go on, Ben. 270 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,245 No, I couldn't. 271 00:13:07,371 --> 00:13:08,789 You got it. 272 00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:10,791 - Brother, come up. - Please say something. 273 00:13:10,874 --> 00:13:12,376 Get up there. 274 00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:18,882 Father. Sir. 275 00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:31,186 I never expected to be in a situation like this. 276 00:13:32,938 --> 00:13:34,272 I'm sure none of us did. 277 00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:38,610 I wish I had known her better. 278 00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:42,489 I wish I had spent more time with her. 279 00:13:44,241 --> 00:13:46,410 I'm sure all of us feel that... 280 00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:48,912 Right now. 281 00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:50,288 Yes. 282 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:55,961 She loved music. 283 00:13:57,254 --> 00:14:00,173 I know that. I know that. 284 00:14:00,298 --> 00:14:02,092 She loved music. 285 00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:03,552 Yeah. 286 00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:08,557 And... 287 00:14:12,561 --> 00:14:14,813 She will always be a song in our hearts. 288 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:30,078 "Song in our hearts." 289 00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,789 You damn near broke me with that one. 290 00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:45,260 Now, I don't know about you, but_ 291 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:47,488 I know it hasn't been long, but I feel like me and you, 292 00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:48,847 we got a real bond. 293 00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:51,016 Kind of like family. 294 00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:52,434 Hundred percent. 295 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:55,562 Wow. 296 00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:57,272 A hundred percent? 297 00:14:58,273 --> 00:14:59,608 Yeah. 298 00:14:59,733 --> 00:15:01,693 Yeah. I felt really close to you guys today. 299 00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:04,029 Don't just say that to say it. 300 00:15:05,489 --> 00:15:07,157 Yeah. I knew it. 301 00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:18,668 Abilene just didn't die. She was murdered. 302 00:15:19,795 --> 00:15:21,922 And the two of us are gonna avenge her death. 303 00:15:23,799 --> 00:15:24,800 What? 304 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:28,011 You and me, we're gonna track her killer down 305 00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:29,471 and deliver vengeance. 306 00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:34,059 Okay, nobody said anything about a killer. 307 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:35,727 An overdose? 308 00:15:36,937 --> 00:15:38,647 At a party in an oilfield? 309 00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:41,233 Yeah. The girl never took so much as an advil in her life. 310 00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:43,568 You know that. You know her better than anybody. 311 00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:47,364 Did you call the police about this? 312 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:49,699 In Texas, we don't dial 911. 313 00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:52,911 Not even for, like, a fire? 314 00:15:52,994 --> 00:15:54,454 Fire or ambulance, fine. 315 00:15:54,538 --> 00:15:55,789 Who do you think did it? 316 00:15:55,914 --> 00:15:57,124 I got a couple theories. 317 00:15:57,582 --> 00:16:00,710 Cartels. Mexican gangbanger I got my eyes on. 318 00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:03,338 I mean, this is just the beginning. It goes deep. 319 00:16:04,089 --> 00:16:05,549 And what's this based on? 320 00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,134 Gut. 321 00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,344 Right. What's behind that though? 322 00:16:10,345 --> 00:16:11,805 Ain't nothing behind gut. 323 00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:14,432 Gut's behind everything else. Otherwise, who are you? 324 00:16:14,516 --> 00:16:16,601 I really think this is something for the police. 325 00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,395 Yeah. You talk about the police 326 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,272 like it's just the same everywhere. 327 00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:23,150 Like the police is McDonald's 328 00:16:23,275 --> 00:16:25,068 andjusfice is an egg mcmuffin. 329 00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:28,363 We don't have the police. We got Mike and Dan. 330 00:16:30,115 --> 00:16:33,660 You and me, we were the men in her life. 331 00:16:34,953 --> 00:16:37,164 And they fucked with the wrong two guys. 332 00:16:38,707 --> 00:16:40,083 Okay. Um... 333 00:16:41,126 --> 00:16:46,173 So, as, hke, a personal boundary everybody's different. 334 00:16:46,298 --> 00:16:47,799 Some people don't eat certain foods. 335 00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:49,176 You know, everybody... 336 00:16:50,719 --> 00:16:52,679 I don't avenge deaths. 337 00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:53,930 Mm-hmm. 338 00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:55,807 It's just who I am. 339 00:16:55,891 --> 00:16:58,852 I... you know, I don't live in a Liam neeson movie. 340 00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,301 But you kind of look like a guy 341 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:02,981 from a Liam neeson movie though. 342 00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:05,317 Okay. Which one am I thinking about? 343 00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:06,860 It was a train. No, it was... 344 00:17:06,985 --> 00:17:08,278 It was just on TV. I don't know. 345 00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:10,280 Schindler's list. Oh, my god. 346 00:17:11,156 --> 00:17:13,450 You look like a lot of those guys in that movie. 347 00:17:14,117 --> 00:17:15,535 Yeah. Thanks. 348 00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:18,222 You know, that was my least favorite Liam neeson movie. 349 00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:19,706 Huge downer. 350 00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:21,708 It was a really sad movie. 351 00:17:21,833 --> 00:17:24,044 Ty, I know that you're in a lot of pain. 352 00:17:24,127 --> 00:17:27,005 Oh, yes, sir. We both are. And you have a lot of anger. 353 00:17:27,339 --> 00:17:29,507 Goddamn it, I'm asking you for your help. 354 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:33,011 If we don't do this, it's like leaving her body 355 00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:35,889 out in the middle of that desert for the rest of our lives. 356 00:17:37,474 --> 00:17:39,517 I knew it the minute I saw you. 357 00:17:40,644 --> 00:17:42,896 'Cause heart sees heart. 358 00:17:44,648 --> 00:17:47,067 Stay down here and avenge Abby's death with me. 359 00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:51,071 What a story that would be. 360 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,541 - Is this a pocket dial? - I have a story. 361 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:04,793 Can it wait? No. 362 00:18:04,876 --> 00:18:06,756 I'm in Texas. I'm on my way back from a funeral. 363 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:08,421 Oh, my god. I'm so sorry. 364 00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:10,548 It's okay. It's not someone I was close to. 365 00:18:11,883 --> 00:18:13,885 But you flew to Texas for it? 366 00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,847 Yes. It was a girl I hooked up with a few times. 367 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:19,557 You flew to Texas 368 00:18:19,683 --> 00:18:22,060 to attend the funeral of a random hookup? 369 00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:23,687 Her family thought that 370 00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,230 we were more serious than I did. 371 00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:27,565 Do you know what? This is a story. 372 00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:29,484 Yeah. Yeah? 373 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:32,529 It's you. Your whole way of life. 374 00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,531 It's dating, it's hookup culture. 375 00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,866 How it enables disconnectedness. 376 00:18:36,992 --> 00:18:38,743 The selfishness. No. 377 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:39,911 The emptiness. No. 378 00:18:39,995 --> 00:18:41,264 The hollowness. That's not what I meant. 379 00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:42,368 The lack of self-awareness. 380 00:18:42,414 --> 00:18:43,641 Okay, that's not what I'm pitching. 381 00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:44,934 It's really how sad your life is. 382 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:46,238 Okay, now you're fucking with me. 383 00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:48,962 Listen, I'm in west Texas 384 00:18:49,045 --> 00:18:51,965 where this family just lost their daughter to an opioid overdose. 385 00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:53,758 That is sad but common. 386 00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:57,345 Except, her brother won't accept it's an overdose. 387 00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:58,513 He says it was a murder. 388 00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:00,015 Based on what? 389 00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:01,599 Nothing. 390 00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:03,143 And that's the story. 391 00:19:03,268 --> 00:19:05,437 This is an existential crime story. 392 00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:08,440 This is in cold blood, but there are no killers. 393 00:19:08,565 --> 00:19:11,943 This is about a new American reality that people can't accept. 394 00:19:12,027 --> 00:19:15,030 So instead, they invent these myths and conspiracies 395 00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:18,700 so they can cast themselves as heroes because 396 00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:21,369 the truth is too hard to accept. 397 00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:24,956 The death ofabilene is about the death ofamerican identity 398 00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:27,334 and the need to find someone to blame for it. 399 00:19:27,417 --> 00:19:30,170 This isn't just a story about vengeance. 400 00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:33,423 It's a story about the need for vengeance. 401 00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,718 The meaning of vengeance. 402 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:42,974 Dead white girl? 403 00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,018 Holy grail of podcasts. 404 00:19:45,143 --> 00:19:48,063 Eloise, lwish my recorder were already on. 405 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:50,148 He's saying such crazy things already. 406 00:19:50,273 --> 00:19:51,608 Her brother? 407 00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:55,570 He is such a character. 408 00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:57,572 And you can get close to the family? 409 00:19:58,323 --> 00:20:00,033 Can I get close to the family? 410 00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:01,785 They think I was her boyfriend. 411 00:20:02,369 --> 00:20:03,536 I mean... 412 00:20:05,872 --> 00:20:07,707 I went to her funeral, for god's sake. 413 00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:09,084 That's good. 414 00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:10,919 I mean, it's fucked up, 415 00:20:11,044 --> 00:20:13,296 but it's good for this. 416 00:20:16,383 --> 00:20:17,759 Okay, let's give it a shot. 417 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,637 Oh! 418 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,263 Okay, talk to me. Give me everything. 419 00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:23,390 Stay with the family, 420 00:20:23,473 --> 00:20:25,725 get as close as possible, record everything. 421 00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:27,495 'Cause you never know what will be important. 422 00:20:27,519 --> 00:20:29,646 I'll be your editor, so I'll pull selects 423 00:20:29,771 --> 00:20:31,189 and see what's there. Okay. 424 00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:33,608 I'll have Tracy overnight you the equipment, 425 00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:35,402 but just use your phone in the meantime 426 00:20:35,485 --> 00:20:37,320 and get the story, stay safe. 427 00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:38,405 You got it. 428 00:20:38,488 --> 00:20:40,365 Not in that order. In that order. 429 00:20:50,208 --> 00:20:54,504 The dust in west Texas settles like rain on a lake. 430 00:20:54,629 --> 00:20:58,007 I'm under a west Texas sky, bright blue texan sky, 431 00:20:58,466 --> 00:21:01,719 where I've just learned about the death ofabilene Shaw. 432 00:21:05,557 --> 00:21:06,850 A person 433 00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:09,978 who lived here. 434 00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:20,572 Hell yeah, brother. 435 00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:22,449 All right. 436 00:21:23,783 --> 00:21:25,869 I'm gonna stay with you guys for a couple of weeks. 437 00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:27,162 I'm gonna record everything 438 00:21:27,245 --> 00:21:28,746 that you think happened to abilene. 439 00:21:28,872 --> 00:21:30,540 Okay? Hell, yes. Then we kill him. 440 00:21:31,875 --> 00:21:33,751 I'm gonna put it on a podcast... 441 00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:41,050 And it will be on podcast platforms. 442 00:21:41,843 --> 00:21:43,011 That's fucking brilliant. 443 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,138 Yeah. You're fucking smart. 444 00:21:45,847 --> 00:21:48,016 All right. Once people on Reddit find out... 445 00:21:49,559 --> 00:21:50,852 They'll kill him for us. 446 00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:01,404 All right. 447 00:22:14,918 --> 00:22:17,378 Hey, mama. Guess who came back after all. 448 00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:19,672 Ben. 449 00:22:20,298 --> 00:22:21,883 Hi. Oh, my god. You came back. 450 00:22:22,050 --> 00:22:23,718 Oh... thank you. 451 00:22:24,385 --> 00:22:26,137 I hope I'm not imposing. 452 00:22:26,429 --> 00:22:27,472 Please. 453 00:22:27,764 --> 00:22:29,432 We have this empty seat at the table. 454 00:22:29,516 --> 00:22:31,643 We can use all the distraction we can get. 455 00:22:33,019 --> 00:22:34,354 Can I get you anything? 456 00:22:36,523 --> 00:22:38,483 Just, what's the Wi-Fi sfluafion? 457 00:22:38,608 --> 00:22:40,419 Oh, it's a little temperamental, it'll kick in. 458 00:22:40,443 --> 00:22:42,779 Did you have a chance to meet everybody before? 459 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:44,239 Uh, no. I would love to. 460 00:22:44,906 --> 00:22:46,783 This is abilene's sister, Paris. 461 00:22:46,866 --> 00:22:49,035 She's 24, fixin' to be 25. 462 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:50,578 She's gonna be a famous filmmaker. 463 00:22:51,162 --> 00:22:53,122 It is a pleasure to meet you, Paris. 464 00:22:53,248 --> 00:22:54,791 Pleasure. I've heard so much about you. 465 00:22:54,916 --> 00:22:57,043 I've heard... yeah. 466 00:22:57,126 --> 00:22:58,753 And this is Kansas City. 467 00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:01,130 She's 17, fixin' to be 18. 468 00:23:01,214 --> 00:23:03,091 And she's gonna be a famous... 469 00:23:03,174 --> 00:23:04,175 Just famous. 470 00:23:04,551 --> 00:23:05,843 Kc, I told you. 471 00:23:05,927 --> 00:23:07,554 Those are not our values. 472 00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,472 You have to be a famous something. 473 00:23:10,598 --> 00:23:12,016 A famous... 474 00:23:13,518 --> 00:23:14,519 Celebrity. 475 00:23:16,938 --> 00:23:17,998 These are really your daughters? 476 00:23:18,022 --> 00:23:19,566 I mean, you all could be sisters. 477 00:23:19,649 --> 00:23:20,793 Oh... You think that I look... 478 00:23:20,817 --> 00:23:22,297 You are so sweet. This fucking old? 479 00:23:23,528 --> 00:23:24,904 And this is El stupido. 480 00:23:25,863 --> 00:23:27,532 Sorry? This is El stupido. 481 00:23:28,908 --> 00:23:30,285 That's what you call him? 482 00:23:30,368 --> 00:23:32,912 Oh, it's okay, Ben. He don't speak Spanish. 483 00:23:35,832 --> 00:23:38,251 And, uh, how old are you? 484 00:23:39,502 --> 00:23:40,712 Nine. 485 00:23:41,087 --> 00:23:42,297 Fixin' to be ten? 486 00:23:47,427 --> 00:23:48,720 Yes, sir. 487 00:23:48,803 --> 00:23:49,929 Boys, come on. 488 00:23:50,013 --> 00:23:51,681 Ben, come take a seat. Thank you. 489 00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:53,033 You have a lovely home, by the way. 490 00:23:53,057 --> 00:23:54,326 - Thank you. - It's really nice. 491 00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:55,602 Yeah. This is granny Carole. 492 00:23:55,727 --> 00:23:56,978 Granny for short. 493 00:23:57,103 --> 00:23:59,314 Nice to meet you, granny. Yeah. 494 00:24:02,275 --> 00:24:04,402 So, Ben, tell us about yourself. 495 00:24:05,028 --> 00:24:06,654 Do you come from a close family? 496 00:24:06,738 --> 00:24:08,573 Yes. We're very close. 497 00:24:08,656 --> 00:24:11,242 We don't see each other much, but we're very close. 498 00:24:12,744 --> 00:24:14,329 You from Texas? 499 00:24:14,454 --> 00:24:15,955 Oh, no, I'm not. 500 00:24:16,039 --> 00:24:17,332 I'm sorry. 501 00:24:17,415 --> 00:24:18,958 That you're not from Texas. 502 00:24:20,543 --> 00:24:22,754 Have you been to Texas before, Ben? Yes, actually. 503 00:24:22,879 --> 00:24:24,922 I've been to Austin, for south by. 504 00:24:25,006 --> 00:24:26,007 For what? 505 00:24:26,132 --> 00:24:27,967 South by southwest is an annual... 506 00:24:28,051 --> 00:24:29,385 No, for what band? 507 00:24:29,510 --> 00:24:31,179 You don't just go to south by. 508 00:24:31,304 --> 00:24:33,139 You go see a band, don't you? 509 00:24:34,641 --> 00:24:35,683 Well, true. 510 00:24:35,767 --> 00:24:38,853 I was part of ajournalism panel about the future of new media. 511 00:24:38,978 --> 00:24:40,521 Amazing. That's so cool. 512 00:24:40,647 --> 00:24:42,231 Thank you. You're welcome. 513 00:24:42,357 --> 00:24:46,486 Um, speaking of. Would you mind if I recorded this dinner? 514 00:24:46,611 --> 00:24:47,611 Record us now? 515 00:24:47,695 --> 00:24:48,756 - Yeah. - Hell yeah. 516 00:24:48,780 --> 00:24:49,781 Would we mind? 517 00:24:49,864 --> 00:24:51,366 I love being recorded. Oh, my god. 518 00:24:51,491 --> 00:24:52,492 Great. Fantastic. 519 00:24:52,575 --> 00:24:53,951 Hey, smile. Okay? Great. 520 00:24:54,077 --> 00:24:56,579 Well, would you want to hear the story of Texas? 521 00:24:57,664 --> 00:24:59,332 Absolutely. Go, granny. 522 00:24:59,457 --> 00:25:01,084 All right. Right here. 523 00:25:01,209 --> 00:25:02,543 My goodness. Okay. 524 00:25:03,586 --> 00:25:04,754 1836. 525 00:25:04,879 --> 00:25:06,798 Texas is part of Mexico, 526 00:25:06,881 --> 00:25:09,467 made up of settlers and English-speaking white folk. 527 00:25:09,592 --> 00:25:12,512 And, they didn't like the government. What else is new? 528 00:25:12,595 --> 00:25:16,015 Them texans wanted to do things their own way. What else is new? 529 00:25:16,432 --> 00:25:19,560 So, you take everybody's two favorite things, 530 00:25:19,644 --> 00:25:21,354 government and Mexicans. 531 00:25:22,355 --> 00:25:24,065 And guess what happens. 532 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,859 Guess. You should... in your words. 533 00:25:26,943 --> 00:25:28,027 All right. All right. 534 00:25:28,111 --> 00:25:30,279 Well, generalissimo Santa Anna 535 00:25:30,405 --> 00:25:33,449 brung up 7,000 Mexican soldiers 536 00:25:33,574 --> 00:25:38,913 to fight against 186 texan rebels at a place called the alamo. 537 00:25:39,038 --> 00:25:40,915 And the texans won. 538 00:25:41,499 --> 00:25:42,792 That's very inspiring. 539 00:25:42,917 --> 00:25:44,252 Say what? 540 00:25:46,379 --> 00:25:48,506 The texans didn't win, Ben. 541 00:25:48,589 --> 00:25:49,716 Mm. 542 00:25:50,007 --> 00:25:54,929 They teach math where you from? 186.7,000. 543 00:25:58,057 --> 00:25:59,767 Seven thousand is more, Ben. 544 00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:02,353 It was a massacre. 545 00:26:03,312 --> 00:26:05,690 It was unspeakable cruelty. 546 00:26:06,149 --> 00:26:07,775 Unspeakable cruelty. 547 00:26:07,859 --> 00:26:10,486 I'm sorry. I had no idea you didn't win the alamo. 548 00:26:10,611 --> 00:26:12,238 Um... 549 00:26:12,321 --> 00:26:14,407 I feel like you guys talk about it a lot. 550 00:26:15,116 --> 00:26:17,452 Who's "equinox girl cute"? 551 00:26:17,577 --> 00:26:19,162 Um... a friend. 552 00:26:19,287 --> 00:26:21,456 Who's "Paris review party Asian"? 553 00:26:21,581 --> 00:26:23,166 Excuse me. Uh... Very good reading. 554 00:26:23,291 --> 00:26:25,376 Let me... the Wi-Fi must have just kicked on. 555 00:26:25,460 --> 00:26:27,253 Who's "Natalie bumble"? 556 00:26:27,670 --> 00:26:29,589 - Who's "Katie raya"? - Let me just... 557 00:26:29,714 --> 00:26:30,983 - Let me put that on... - Raya? 558 00:26:31,007 --> 00:26:32,592 Let me put that on airplane mode. 559 00:26:32,717 --> 00:26:34,570 Lthought raya was supposed to be exclusive. 560 00:26:34,594 --> 00:26:36,471 So what do you think of this place, Ben? 561 00:26:37,430 --> 00:26:38,431 Oh, I love it. 562 00:26:38,514 --> 00:26:40,075 Are you joking? Are you serious? You love it? 563 00:26:40,099 --> 00:26:41,309 You're from New York City. 564 00:26:41,392 --> 00:26:43,186 - Literally nothing happens here. - Yeah. 565 00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:46,481 Well, I mean, it is a little... 566 00:26:48,191 --> 00:26:49,275 You know. 567 00:26:50,193 --> 00:26:51,295 Come oh, that's not fair. 568 00:26:51,319 --> 00:26:52,963 We just got a target. Excuse me? How dare you? 569 00:26:52,987 --> 00:26:54,947 Do you know how fucking good our football team is? 570 00:26:55,031 --> 00:26:57,259 This is our town. Okay, look, I don't know where to... 571 00:26:57,283 --> 00:26:58,284 Where to land here. 572 00:26:58,367 --> 00:27:00,345 Ben, there's probably something you should know 573 00:27:00,369 --> 00:27:01,829 about this place. Yeah. 574 00:27:01,954 --> 00:27:04,999 This is the most, wretched, 575 00:27:05,917 --> 00:27:08,711 godforsaken stretch of land on the face of the earth. 576 00:27:09,295 --> 00:27:11,255 And I'd never leave. You know what I mean? 577 00:27:12,757 --> 00:27:14,801 Yeah. That's how I feel about Twitter. 578 00:27:14,926 --> 00:27:16,385 See, Ben's a journalist. 579 00:27:16,511 --> 00:27:18,012 One of the finest there is. 580 00:27:18,513 --> 00:27:20,181 He writes for the New York magazine. 581 00:27:20,264 --> 00:27:21,432 New yorker. Yep. 582 00:27:21,516 --> 00:27:22,934 And he's gonna help us find out 583 00:27:23,017 --> 00:27:24,852 what really happened to abilene. 584 00:27:26,229 --> 00:27:28,314 I was saying we go out and settle it with a .45, 585 00:27:28,397 --> 00:27:32,693 but Ben gives a whole new perspective to the situation. 586 00:27:32,777 --> 00:27:36,155 Ty, you can't solve something like this with a .45. 587 00:27:36,739 --> 00:27:38,574 It's not as simple as one person. 588 00:27:38,658 --> 00:27:40,910 It's a whole system, son. 589 00:27:40,993 --> 00:27:42,245 Tell us what you mean, granny. 590 00:27:42,328 --> 00:27:44,372 It's the breakdown of society, is what it is. 591 00:27:44,497 --> 00:27:47,250 It's the breakdown of the school system, the government. 592 00:27:47,667 --> 00:27:49,585 It's the pharmaceutical companies. 593 00:27:50,711 --> 00:27:52,630 It's the breakdown of the family... 594 00:27:53,631 --> 00:27:54,911 And tradition. 595 00:27:56,592 --> 00:27:59,095 Oh, there's a whole lot of people responsible 596 00:27:59,220 --> 00:28:01,430 - for what happened to abilene. - That's true. 597 00:28:01,556 --> 00:28:02,723 Yes, ma'am. Amen. 598 00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:04,016 I think that's very wise. 599 00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:06,185 You're gonna need a 12-Gauge, couple ofars. 600 00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:07,603 No. A Wesson automatic. 601 00:28:07,728 --> 00:28:09,081 No, no, no. And a sidearm for safety. 602 00:28:09,105 --> 00:28:10,731 Yep. Exactly. We're not doing that. 603 00:28:10,857 --> 00:28:12,400 Oh, we're not? Yeah. 604 00:28:14,569 --> 00:28:17,154 I didn't think you had the balls. 605 00:28:18,739 --> 00:28:20,533 Are you gonna help us, Ben? 606 00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:24,370 You know, uh... 607 00:28:27,748 --> 00:28:29,959 There's some things I'm good at. 608 00:28:31,586 --> 00:28:33,629 I'm good at asking the right questions. 609 00:28:33,713 --> 00:28:35,840 I'm good at getting people to talk. 610 00:28:35,923 --> 00:28:37,633 And I'm especially good 611 00:28:37,717 --> 00:28:39,302 at drawing thematic connections 612 00:28:39,385 --> 00:28:41,137 between seemingly disparate elements 613 00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:45,057 and using that to illustrate a larger point or theory. 614 00:28:45,683 --> 00:28:49,478 So, whoever or whatever 615 00:28:50,021 --> 00:28:52,315 is responsible for what happened to abilene, 616 00:28:53,524 --> 00:28:55,776 I will find this person 617 00:28:56,986 --> 00:29:00,031 or this generalized societal force, 618 00:29:01,449 --> 00:29:03,701 and I will define it. 619 00:29:05,828 --> 00:29:07,121 I'll define it. 620 00:29:10,207 --> 00:29:11,500 Bless your heart. 621 00:29:18,716 --> 00:29:20,593 I guess we have a guest room now. 622 00:29:27,058 --> 00:29:30,519 Well, rest up good. We'll meet in the morning and start to solve this. 623 00:29:30,603 --> 00:29:31,771 Yeah. 624 00:29:31,854 --> 00:29:33,356 See you in the morning. 625 00:29:33,439 --> 00:29:34,774 Good night, Ty. Good night. 626 00:31:44,945 --> 00:31:45,946 Good morning. 627 00:31:47,364 --> 00:31:48,741 Yeah, that's it. What else... 628 00:31:48,866 --> 00:31:50,386 - Can I say it proves a lot? - Yeah. 629 00:31:50,493 --> 00:31:52,095 I'm gonna take a short break here, 630 00:31:52,119 --> 00:31:55,331 and during this break, I hope you'll call and support this station 631 00:31:55,414 --> 00:31:58,209 during this long, important membership drive. 632 00:31:58,292 --> 00:32:00,169 We have some great free gifts to offer you, 633 00:32:00,294 --> 00:32:02,046 and I'm not just talking coffee mugs. 634 00:32:08,177 --> 00:32:10,638 Well, Ben, there's really two versions of life out here. 635 00:32:10,763 --> 00:32:13,557 Boom times, everybody's rich and busy. 636 00:32:13,641 --> 00:32:15,601 It's like one big party out here. 637 00:32:15,726 --> 00:32:17,561 And then the bust comes. 638 00:32:17,686 --> 00:32:19,498 It's really like two different places out here. 639 00:32:19,522 --> 00:32:21,190 It's always boom or bust. 640 00:32:21,816 --> 00:32:23,651 Which is it right now? 641 00:32:24,110 --> 00:32:26,487 Kinda in between. Yeah. 642 00:32:26,612 --> 00:32:29,240 Kinda in between, to tell you the truth. Okay. 643 00:32:31,283 --> 00:32:32,493 You son of a... 644 00:32:33,202 --> 00:32:35,079 - Get off. - Crawl. There's our worm. 645 00:32:35,162 --> 00:32:36,747 Oh you like being on top. 646 00:32:36,831 --> 00:32:38,040 Get off. Yeah. 647 00:32:39,750 --> 00:32:40,835 This the guy? 648 00:32:42,044 --> 00:32:43,045 Hmm. 649 00:32:43,129 --> 00:32:45,464 Let me save you some time. Sancholo. 650 00:32:45,589 --> 00:32:47,591 Sancholo. Sancholo. 651 00:32:47,675 --> 00:32:48,884 What's sancho/o? 652 00:32:48,968 --> 00:32:50,469 The guy who killed abilene. 653 00:32:50,594 --> 00:32:53,889 A Mexican drug dealer. Evil motherfucker. 654 00:32:54,014 --> 00:32:55,641 You name it, he's got it. 655 00:32:55,766 --> 00:32:57,393 Not crazy about his prices though. 656 00:32:57,518 --> 00:33:00,437 So, you know who killed abilene? Yes, sir. 657 00:33:00,563 --> 00:33:02,690 Did you call the police about it? 658 00:33:02,815 --> 00:33:04,441 Mike and Dan? 659 00:33:04,525 --> 00:33:06,193 Those lazy fucktards. 660 00:33:06,277 --> 00:33:07,403 Everything's an accident. 661 00:33:07,486 --> 00:33:09,321 Gun accident. Driving accident. 662 00:33:10,197 --> 00:33:13,284 I've known abilene since we were knee-high to a grasshopper. 663 00:33:13,409 --> 00:33:15,327 She never touched so much as an advil, 664 00:33:15,452 --> 00:33:17,454 and then, out of the blue, 665 00:33:17,580 --> 00:33:20,749 they find this angel, this angel, 666 00:33:21,250 --> 00:33:23,794 dead of an oxy od at a party he threw! 667 00:33:23,919 --> 00:33:25,504 You're getting me warmed up. 668 00:33:25,629 --> 00:33:28,007 He's been obsessed with her since middle school. 669 00:33:28,090 --> 00:33:29,550 Yep. He'd call the house every night. 670 00:33:29,675 --> 00:33:31,194 They used to be on the phone for hours. 671 00:33:31,218 --> 00:33:33,137 He's just a piece of it anyway. 672 00:33:33,262 --> 00:33:35,014 It's too big to understand. 673 00:33:35,139 --> 00:33:39,727 You got deep state in bed with pill pushers, cartels, pedos. 674 00:33:39,852 --> 00:33:41,228 The law. How... 675 00:33:41,353 --> 00:33:42,479 Hey. 676 00:33:42,563 --> 00:33:44,356 And you're a piece of it, too. 677 00:33:45,608 --> 00:33:48,777 So, um, I'd love to talk to some of the characters you mentioned. 678 00:33:48,861 --> 00:33:50,696 Mike and Dan? Sancholo? 679 00:33:50,821 --> 00:33:53,365 - He's gotta be at the rodeo in holliston. - No doubt. 680 00:33:53,449 --> 00:33:55,326 There and the honky-tonk, too, afterwards. 681 00:33:55,451 --> 00:33:57,703 That's where a drug dealer can do their best business. 682 00:33:58,120 --> 00:33:59,663 'Cause everybody goes to the rodeo. 683 00:34:00,122 --> 00:34:01,332 White, Mexicans. 684 00:34:02,625 --> 00:34:05,211 You really want to avenge her with him? 685 00:34:05,336 --> 00:34:06,962 I'm like a brother to you. 686 00:34:07,087 --> 00:34:09,465 Well, he's like a brother-in-law. 687 00:34:09,590 --> 00:34:10,925 Come on. 688 00:34:11,008 --> 00:34:13,719 Ben, you ever been in a fight? 689 00:34:13,844 --> 00:34:16,889 You mean like a physical fight or like an online skirmish? 690 00:34:20,017 --> 00:34:21,018 I got him. 691 00:34:21,268 --> 00:34:23,562 Crawl wouldn't hurt a fly, would you, crawl? 692 00:34:23,687 --> 00:34:26,523 I never understood that expression about flies. 693 00:34:27,191 --> 00:34:28,692 Yeah, I'd kill a fly, 694 00:34:28,776 --> 00:34:31,528 but what kind of sick fuck would hurt a fly? 695 00:34:32,947 --> 00:34:34,865 Make it feel pain? Hmm? 696 00:34:37,743 --> 00:34:41,664 You don't have any idea where you are, do you? 697 00:34:43,832 --> 00:34:45,459 Want me to show you a map? 698 00:34:47,544 --> 00:34:49,255 Welcome to Texas. 699 00:34:49,964 --> 00:34:52,216 You are here. 700 00:35:08,732 --> 00:35:09,733 Morning, kc. 701 00:35:09,817 --> 00:35:10,818 Hey. 702 00:35:10,985 --> 00:35:13,362 Uh, would you like some coffee? 703 00:35:13,445 --> 00:35:15,364 Sure. How do you take it? 704 00:35:17,199 --> 00:35:18,325 In the mouth? 705 00:35:22,830 --> 00:35:25,749 All right, tell me something that you love about where you live. 706 00:35:25,874 --> 00:35:27,501 What a burger! 707 00:35:28,043 --> 00:35:29,336 Okay, great. 708 00:35:29,420 --> 00:35:30,587 Um, tell me about it. 709 00:35:30,671 --> 00:35:32,381 You want to go right now? Yeah, let's go. 710 00:35:32,464 --> 00:35:33,465 I'm ready. 711 00:35:33,549 --> 00:35:35,592 You want... Just, no, tell me about it. 712 00:35:35,718 --> 00:35:37,761 You're gonna love what a burger, Ben. 713 00:35:37,886 --> 00:35:40,306 Oh, it's the best. What makes it the best? 714 00:35:40,431 --> 00:35:42,725 Wherever you are, there's a what a burger. 715 00:35:42,808 --> 00:35:45,269 Yeah. It's always right there. 716 00:35:46,770 --> 00:35:48,355 Okay. And then when you get there, 717 00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:50,190 what do you like about it? What do you get? 718 00:35:50,316 --> 00:35:51,793 Whatever you want. It's always right there. 719 00:35:51,817 --> 00:35:53,444 You could order whatever you want, Ben. 720 00:35:53,569 --> 00:35:56,405 Right, but there are a lot of places like that. 721 00:35:56,530 --> 00:35:58,824 So, let's say, There is a McDonald's, 722 00:35:58,949 --> 00:36:01,452 a burger king, a Sonic and a what a burger 723 00:36:01,577 --> 00:36:04,121 all lined up. Which one do you go to? 724 00:36:04,204 --> 00:36:05,497 What a burger! 725 00:36:05,581 --> 00:36:06,665 Right, right. Why? 726 00:36:06,790 --> 00:36:08,834 Because it's right there! 727 00:36:08,959 --> 00:36:10,711 Yes, but they're all right there. 728 00:36:11,754 --> 00:36:15,716 In this scenario, they're all right there. 729 00:36:15,841 --> 00:36:20,304 So, what do you get out of what a burger? 730 00:36:20,387 --> 00:36:22,181 What makes it better to you? 731 00:36:22,264 --> 00:36:23,557 What are you getting... Ben. 732 00:36:24,850 --> 00:36:26,185 Asking why you love what a burger 733 00:36:26,268 --> 00:36:28,270 is like asking why you love Christmas 734 00:36:28,979 --> 00:36:31,231 or a summer night or why you love your dog. 735 00:36:32,149 --> 00:36:33,626 I mean, you could point to the reasons, 736 00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:35,861 but the reasons aren't really the point. 737 00:36:36,236 --> 00:36:39,073 You just love it, and that's how love works. 738 00:36:53,420 --> 00:36:57,049 I'm on my way to get what could be some good local color. 739 00:36:57,174 --> 00:36:59,885 It's the place abilene recorded some demos. 740 00:36:59,968 --> 00:37:03,305 I'm heading towards the Quentin sellers music factory. 741 00:37:03,389 --> 00:37:06,767 A place in marfa, the arts town, where... 742 00:37:06,892 --> 00:37:09,186 People pursue their dreams of musical stardom. 743 00:37:09,311 --> 00:37:13,482 His motto is "making dreams come true since 2018." 744 00:37:15,109 --> 00:37:17,861 Eloise, if you have, um... If you can play a clip of that, 745 00:37:18,612 --> 00:37:20,489 Rebecca black song, "Friday," 746 00:37:20,614 --> 00:37:22,282 that would be really funny here. 747 00:37:22,408 --> 00:37:24,076 I bet it's cheap to play. 748 00:37:38,632 --> 00:37:40,050 Yeah, yeah 749 00:37:42,219 --> 00:37:43,804 Yeah 750 00:37:54,982 --> 00:37:56,316 Yeah 751 00:38:08,370 --> 00:38:09,371 Okay. 752 00:38:12,082 --> 00:38:13,500 Hi. 753 00:38:15,586 --> 00:38:16,795 What is music? 754 00:38:17,504 --> 00:38:19,006 Like, singing and stuff. 755 00:38:19,548 --> 00:38:20,757 Yeah, that's right. 756 00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:25,137 Let's take a step back. 757 00:38:26,513 --> 00:38:28,515 I want to share an idea with you. 758 00:38:29,933 --> 00:38:32,811 There's no argument more profound 759 00:38:33,937 --> 00:38:36,523 than how the universe came into existence. 760 00:38:36,940 --> 00:38:39,693 Oh, god. Are we here because of god or science? 761 00:38:40,152 --> 00:38:42,237 I mean, it is, by its very nature, 762 00:38:43,489 --> 00:38:45,365 the most fundamental question. 763 00:38:46,658 --> 00:38:50,162 But there's one thing that everyone agrees on. 764 00:38:52,706 --> 00:38:57,169 And that is whether it was god declaring "let there be light," 765 00:38:59,213 --> 00:39:02,007 or an infinite particle of energy 766 00:39:02,090 --> 00:39:03,842 bursting forth in the big bang. 767 00:39:06,178 --> 00:39:07,179 Everyone, 768 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:09,848 and I mean everyone, 769 00:39:11,183 --> 00:39:14,269 agrees that the universe 770 00:39:15,604 --> 00:39:17,523 started with a sound. 771 00:39:21,109 --> 00:39:23,278 Why do I call myself a record producer? 772 00:39:23,987 --> 00:39:25,239 I don't know. 773 00:39:25,781 --> 00:39:27,991 Yeah, I mean, we don't even make records anymore. 774 00:39:29,535 --> 00:39:32,704 What we're recording here isn't your record. 775 00:39:33,956 --> 00:39:35,624 It's your sound... 776 00:39:36,500 --> 00:39:38,961 On the record that started 777 00:39:40,087 --> 00:39:42,339 with the very first moment in time. 778 00:39:44,216 --> 00:39:46,426 So when you sing this song, 779 00:39:48,887 --> 00:39:52,891 I want you to think about how what you're making 780 00:39:54,059 --> 00:39:58,814 is the record of your time here on this earth. 781 00:40:00,774 --> 00:40:04,361 It's the sound that you scratch 782 00:40:05,988 --> 00:40:07,614 with your life 783 00:40:09,449 --> 00:40:11,868 on the record of the universe. 784 00:40:15,247 --> 00:40:17,165 Okay. Okay? 785 00:40:21,795 --> 00:40:27,884 I finished my shift at Claire 's 786 00:40:28,010 --> 00:40:34,099 climbed up those steep mall stairs 787 00:40:34,224 --> 00:40:39,980 and the pain of having nowhere to go 788 00:40:40,105 --> 00:40:43,108 pierced the skin of my soul 789 00:40:43,233 --> 00:40:47,029 as I sat on the steps 790 00:40:47,154 --> 00:40:49,364 and waited and waited 791 00:40:49,489 --> 00:40:54,786 for no one to take me home 792 00:40:55,454 --> 00:40:56,496 yeah. 793 00:40:59,124 --> 00:41:00,292 Thank you. 794 00:41:00,417 --> 00:41:02,294 I call this place the factory. 795 00:41:02,419 --> 00:41:04,296 You know, after Andy warhol's factory. 796 00:41:06,006 --> 00:41:09,468 Most people around here think it's a reference to c+c music factory. 797 00:41:09,593 --> 00:41:12,804 Which, honestly, I think warhol would've loved, but... 798 00:41:14,139 --> 00:41:15,641 Yeah, actually. Yeah. 799 00:41:15,766 --> 00:41:16,933 I'm from out here. 800 00:41:17,059 --> 00:41:18,393 I went to college in new haven. 801 00:41:18,769 --> 00:41:20,395 Oh, iwent to school in Boston. 802 00:41:20,479 --> 00:41:21,956 Yeah, I thought about staying there, 803 00:41:21,980 --> 00:41:24,232 but this is the place that needs something like this. 804 00:41:24,316 --> 00:41:26,234 The problem isn't that people aren't smart. 805 00:41:26,360 --> 00:41:27,778 The problem is that they are. 806 00:41:28,737 --> 00:41:30,405 Hthelandscape is like this, 807 00:41:30,530 --> 00:41:31,990 and people were just boring, 808 00:41:32,074 --> 00:41:33,533 you wouldn't have this problem. 809 00:41:34,242 --> 00:41:36,995 The problem is, you get all these bright, creative lights 810 00:41:37,079 --> 00:41:39,289 and nowhere to plug in their energy. 811 00:41:39,831 --> 00:41:41,917 And so it gets channeled into conspiracy theories 812 00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:43,418 and drugs and violence. 813 00:41:44,127 --> 00:41:46,046 Who are your favorite music artists right now? 814 00:41:46,129 --> 00:41:47,214 Um... 815 00:41:47,339 --> 00:41:48,715 Yeah. Can I take a guess? 816 00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:50,300 You're a play list guy. 817 00:41:50,384 --> 00:41:51,385 What does that mean? 818 00:41:51,468 --> 00:41:53,279 When some computer recommends you a bunch of songs 819 00:41:53,303 --> 00:41:55,389 based on your favorites, and a bunch more 820 00:41:55,514 --> 00:41:56,991 based on your favorites of those. Right. 821 00:41:57,015 --> 00:41:58,809 So you're listening to a bunch of music that, 822 00:41:58,892 --> 00:42:00,727 I mean, you genuinely like... Yeah. 823 00:42:00,852 --> 00:42:02,354 But you have no idea who sings it. 824 00:42:02,646 --> 00:42:05,286 Now, these play lists, it's like the dating app for music. 825 00:42:05,357 --> 00:42:06,957 You're not hearing other people's voices. 826 00:42:07,067 --> 00:42:10,070 You're just hearing your voice get played back at you. 827 00:42:10,278 --> 00:42:11,738 How are you supposed to fall in love? 828 00:42:13,407 --> 00:42:15,659 Art used to be in charge of us. 829 00:42:15,951 --> 00:42:17,369 You used to buy a whole album 830 00:42:17,452 --> 00:42:19,705 not even knowing what songs would be on it. 831 00:42:20,997 --> 00:42:23,625 Now we have everything on demand. 832 00:42:24,793 --> 00:42:26,253 At your fingertips. 833 00:42:27,254 --> 00:42:28,547 In pieces. 834 00:42:29,965 --> 00:42:33,135 You think half the people that are posting quotes from Oscar wilde 835 00:42:33,218 --> 00:42:35,762 have ever actually read one of his plays? No. 836 00:42:35,887 --> 00:42:37,639 Or posting photos ofaudrey hepburn 837 00:42:37,723 --> 00:42:39,933 have actually seen the film that it's from? 838 00:42:40,058 --> 00:42:41,685 Not a chance, right? No. 839 00:42:42,269 --> 00:42:43,353 What is that about, huh? 840 00:42:43,437 --> 00:42:45,981 It's the same in culture as it is in archaeology. 841 00:42:46,106 --> 00:42:48,191 When a civilization collapses, 842 00:42:48,692 --> 00:42:50,819 only the tiniest fragments remain. 843 00:42:51,486 --> 00:42:52,988 But we can build it back again. 844 00:42:53,739 --> 00:42:54,948 How? 845 00:42:55,031 --> 00:42:56,491 Make recordings. 846 00:42:57,284 --> 00:42:58,577 Real people. 847 00:42:59,327 --> 00:43:02,664 Not what people think that they already know and want to hear. 848 00:43:03,248 --> 00:43:04,416 Real people. 849 00:43:04,541 --> 00:43:08,462 Not some generic stereotype or generic song. 850 00:43:10,297 --> 00:43:11,798 Real people. 851 00:43:14,593 --> 00:43:16,261 What's this podcast about, anyway? 852 00:43:16,344 --> 00:43:18,555 Well, um, it's about america. 853 00:43:18,638 --> 00:43:19,639 Okay. 854 00:43:19,723 --> 00:43:23,185 It's about the myths that we tell ourselves. 855 00:43:23,310 --> 00:43:24,311 Who is it about? 856 00:43:26,313 --> 00:43:27,314 All of us. 857 00:43:27,397 --> 00:43:30,484 Every story we tell is ultimately about a person. 858 00:43:32,110 --> 00:43:33,153 Abilene Shaw. 859 00:43:34,446 --> 00:43:35,489 Abilene. 860 00:43:36,198 --> 00:43:37,199 Yeah. 861 00:43:37,532 --> 00:43:39,534 You're making a podcast about abilene. 862 00:43:40,368 --> 00:43:41,745 Well, it's a little about abilene. 863 00:43:41,870 --> 00:43:43,622 I'm trying to make it more about... no. 864 00:43:43,747 --> 00:43:46,416 It's about abilene. The person. 865 00:43:46,541 --> 00:43:47,793 That's all you need. 866 00:43:47,918 --> 00:43:49,278 What did you think about her music? 867 00:43:49,336 --> 00:43:50,587 I haven't really heard it. 868 00:43:50,670 --> 00:43:52,088 Shut the front door. 869 00:43:52,214 --> 00:43:54,674 I mean, I haven't... Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. 870 00:43:57,469 --> 00:43:58,637 Come with me. 871 00:44:00,472 --> 00:44:01,473 Here it is. 872 00:44:01,556 --> 00:44:02,933 Everything we ever recorded. 873 00:44:03,016 --> 00:44:05,185 - Thank you so much. - You're in for a treat. 874 00:44:06,812 --> 00:44:09,147 Doesn't she have a sister who wants to be a singer? 875 00:44:09,231 --> 00:44:10,774 Wants to be famous. 876 00:44:10,857 --> 00:44:12,859 Means she knows she's somebody. 877 00:44:12,943 --> 00:44:14,861 Just doesn't know who yet. 878 00:44:14,945 --> 00:44:16,696 She needs to find her voice. 879 00:44:18,031 --> 00:44:19,449 What about my voice? 880 00:44:19,533 --> 00:44:21,576 I'll put you in the studio. What do you want to do? 881 00:44:22,953 --> 00:44:24,287 I, you know... 882 00:44:25,455 --> 00:44:29,626 If I came here for advice about my voice, my... 883 00:44:30,126 --> 00:44:32,003 You know, my writing, my podcast, 884 00:44:32,921 --> 00:44:34,506 what would you tell me? 885 00:44:37,217 --> 00:44:40,470 I'd probably say that nobody writes anything. 886 00:44:42,806 --> 00:44:44,432 All we do is translate. 887 00:44:45,308 --> 00:44:47,727 So if you ever get stuck and you don't know what to say... 888 00:44:49,145 --> 00:44:50,522 Just listen. 889 00:44:51,481 --> 00:44:52,983 Even to the silences. 890 00:44:55,151 --> 00:44:58,738 Listen as hard as you can to the world around you 891 00:45:00,740 --> 00:45:02,617 and repeat back what you hear. 892 00:45:04,286 --> 00:45:05,662 That translation, 893 00:45:07,289 --> 00:45:08,582 that's your voice. 894 00:45:16,464 --> 00:45:20,051 I gotta say, this is not anything like what I expected to find. 895 00:45:20,677 --> 00:45:22,429 You came here to make fun of me, didn't you? 896 00:45:23,889 --> 00:45:25,724 No, no. No. No, I get it's... 897 00:45:25,807 --> 00:45:27,392 It's... I get it. 898 00:45:27,851 --> 00:45:29,811 Record producer in the middle of nowhere. 899 00:45:29,936 --> 00:45:31,938 You thought I'd be sillier, smaller. 900 00:45:33,064 --> 00:45:34,190 I get it. 901 00:45:34,941 --> 00:45:35,942 Hey, look. 902 00:45:37,319 --> 00:45:38,445 It's already working. 903 00:45:39,070 --> 00:45:40,155 You listened. 904 00:45:40,947 --> 00:45:42,073 You learned. 905 00:45:45,535 --> 00:45:46,912 Welcome to Texas. 906 00:45:53,627 --> 00:45:54,878 Thank you. 907 00:46:06,723 --> 00:46:09,935 The setting sun sets Texas afire with a glow. 908 00:46:11,269 --> 00:46:12,520 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 909 00:46:12,646 --> 00:46:14,147 It's fucking beautiful. 910 00:46:23,782 --> 00:46:25,116 Well, hi. 911 00:46:28,662 --> 00:46:30,163 Thank you. 912 00:46:30,246 --> 00:46:32,540 When I told my mama that I was gonna move to New York 913 00:46:32,624 --> 00:46:34,084 and try and make it in music, 914 00:46:34,167 --> 00:46:37,003 she looked at me and she just said, "bless your heart." 915 00:46:37,796 --> 00:46:39,839 Which is Texas for, "fuck you." 916 00:46:41,174 --> 00:46:42,384 Love you, mama. 917 00:46:43,969 --> 00:46:48,556 True love will find you in the end 918 00:46:50,392 --> 00:46:54,521 you'll find out just who is your friend 919 00:46:57,524 --> 00:47:00,610 don't be sad, I know you will... 920 00:47:00,902 --> 00:47:03,029 Ah! 921 00:47:03,697 --> 00:47:05,740 Will you help me unjam my gun? 922 00:47:07,367 --> 00:47:08,994 I don't know how to do that. 923 00:47:21,214 --> 00:47:23,216 They ought to call you El stupido. 924 00:47:27,804 --> 00:47:29,264 Can I sleep on your floor? 925 00:47:31,099 --> 00:47:32,100 Yeah. 926 00:47:33,143 --> 00:47:34,227 Of course. 927 00:47:35,895 --> 00:47:37,063 Thank you. 928 00:47:57,751 --> 00:48:00,837 I'm still drivin' 929 00:48:00,962 --> 00:48:03,548 when's this break gon' come? 930 00:48:03,673 --> 00:48:06,009 You back my pickin' 931 00:48:06,134 --> 00:48:09,345 with a big ol' timpani drum... 932 00:48:09,471 --> 00:48:11,931 Vengeance is a unique phenomenon. 933 00:48:12,057 --> 00:48:13,683 Texas invented vengeance. 934 00:48:13,808 --> 00:48:16,394 It makes no sense if you think about it. 935 00:48:16,519 --> 00:48:20,231 Every other primal human instinct leads to a clear evolutionary reward. 936 00:48:20,774 --> 00:48:22,233 But vengeance is different. 937 00:48:22,358 --> 00:48:23,568 It's not about the future. 938 00:48:23,693 --> 00:48:25,653 It's only about the past. 939 00:48:25,779 --> 00:48:28,615 When that massacre happened, we didn't retreat. 940 00:48:28,698 --> 00:48:31,743 We didn't say, "let's all make sure we don't get mexiphobia." 941 00:48:31,868 --> 00:48:34,162 We said, "remember the alamo." 942 00:48:34,954 --> 00:48:37,290 It's not about hope. It's about regret. 943 00:48:38,083 --> 00:48:39,751 Abby was always creatively minded. 944 00:48:39,876 --> 00:48:41,753 She would make movies with her sisters. 945 00:48:41,878 --> 00:48:43,254 Music, of course. 946 00:48:43,379 --> 00:48:45,882 Oh, she had such a beautiful voice. 947 00:48:46,841 --> 00:48:48,593 I really wish more people could've heard it. 948 00:48:48,718 --> 00:48:49,803 You're a writer. 949 00:48:49,928 --> 00:48:51,596 Anything I'd know? 950 00:48:53,014 --> 00:48:54,265 None of this. 951 00:48:54,808 --> 00:48:56,408 The desperation that you see around here, 952 00:48:56,518 --> 00:48:59,187 it's not from a lack of intelligence or creativity. 953 00:48:59,312 --> 00:49:00,647 It's an excess. 954 00:49:00,772 --> 00:49:02,398 We're not really a gun family. 955 00:49:02,524 --> 00:49:04,651 We have a few rifles for shooting targets, 956 00:49:04,776 --> 00:49:06,236 a couple handguns for safety, and... 957 00:49:06,319 --> 00:49:08,439 And that doesn't concern you? Why would it concern me? 958 00:49:08,488 --> 00:49:10,240 There's this playwright, Anton Chekhov, 959 00:49:10,365 --> 00:49:12,826 and he says that if there's a gun in act one of a play... 960 00:49:12,951 --> 00:49:15,745 There's no guns in any one of his plays I can think of. 961 00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:17,497 Cherry orchard, no. Uncle Vanya, no. 962 00:49:17,622 --> 00:49:19,308 I'm not actually that familiar with his plays. 963 00:49:19,332 --> 00:49:20,667 I'm more familiar with his theory. 964 00:49:20,792 --> 00:49:23,837 But the stakes of these feelings aren't hypothetical. 965 00:49:24,170 --> 00:49:25,839 They're all too real. 966 00:49:25,922 --> 00:49:27,590 I'm your host, Ben manalowitz, 967 00:49:27,674 --> 00:49:29,342 from American radio collective. 968 00:49:29,467 --> 00:49:31,594 This is dead white girl. 969 00:49:31,678 --> 00:49:32,679 Hey. 970 00:49:32,804 --> 00:49:34,639 So, this is great. 971 00:49:34,764 --> 00:49:35,932 Really? 972 00:49:36,057 --> 00:49:38,726 Yeah. I'm, like, dorking out over this family. 973 00:49:38,852 --> 00:49:40,311 Their family's like my family. 974 00:49:40,436 --> 00:49:41,521 Great. Great. 975 00:49:41,646 --> 00:49:43,022 Do you have any notes? 976 00:49:43,106 --> 00:49:44,274 Yeah. I got a couple. 977 00:49:44,357 --> 00:49:45,557 Thought you said you loved it. 978 00:49:46,192 --> 00:49:49,320 You asked if! Had notes, and I got notes okay, first-timer? 979 00:49:49,404 --> 00:49:51,124 Okay. All right, all right, what do you got? 980 00:49:51,739 --> 00:49:53,259 Okay, you're stepping on people's lines, 981 00:49:53,283 --> 00:49:55,577 and we need it clean, so... Yep, yep. 982 00:49:55,702 --> 00:49:57,871 Just like what you're doing right now. Don't do that. 983 00:49:57,996 --> 00:49:59,164 Right. 984 00:49:59,289 --> 00:50:00,957 Don't talk while they're talking. 985 00:50:01,082 --> 00:50:03,793 Just listen or pretend to listen. 986 00:50:03,918 --> 00:50:05,420 Okay. What else? 987 00:50:05,837 --> 00:50:07,437 And you know what would help some people? 988 00:50:07,505 --> 00:50:10,425 If you do a silent laugh to egg them on. 989 00:50:10,508 --> 00:50:11,801 You know, like... 990 00:50:13,845 --> 00:50:15,180 Like what? I lost you. 991 00:50:15,305 --> 00:50:16,514 No, I'm doing it. 992 00:50:17,182 --> 00:50:18,266 Right, okay. 993 00:50:18,391 --> 00:50:20,435 Where are you going to next, the rodeo? 994 00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:22,061 Yep, my first rodeo. 995 00:50:22,145 --> 00:50:23,146 I'm really excited. 996 00:50:23,229 --> 00:50:25,356 Apparently, it's a real socioeconomic cross section. 997 00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:27,942 Yeah, and horses and bulls and stuff. 998 00:50:31,154 --> 00:50:32,155 You're doing it? 999 00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:33,406 Yeah, could you tell? 1000 00:50:33,823 --> 00:50:34,866 Good luck. 1001 00:50:39,037 --> 00:50:40,663 - All right, Ben. - Thank you. 1002 00:50:40,788 --> 00:50:42,141 You're gonna love this place. Yeah. 1003 00:50:42,165 --> 00:50:43,708 A whole lot to see, lot to take in. 1004 00:50:43,833 --> 00:50:46,169 "Fourth annual bull bash cowboy protection." 1005 00:50:46,294 --> 00:50:48,630 Cowboy protection for buhfighfing 1006 00:50:48,755 --> 00:50:50,590 in oyster creek, Texas. Cool. Excellent. 1007 00:50:50,715 --> 00:50:52,217 And, you're a pit master. 1008 00:50:52,342 --> 00:50:54,886 Yes, sir. And what is the secret to your success? 1009 00:50:54,969 --> 00:50:56,930 Time and more time. 1010 00:50:58,556 --> 00:51:00,350 Bingo! Ten points! 1011 00:51:02,936 --> 00:51:03,937 Oh, hell yes! 1012 00:51:04,020 --> 00:51:05,331 - Ben, you're gonna love this. - All right. 1013 00:51:05,355 --> 00:51:07,291 Deep-fried twinkies. Ben, you gotta try one of these. 1014 00:51:07,315 --> 00:51:08,775 Hello, beautiful. Hi. 1015 00:51:08,900 --> 00:51:10,652 Can I get, one, two, three, four, five 1016 00:51:10,777 --> 00:51:11,986 deep-fried twinkies? 1017 00:51:12,111 --> 00:51:13,696 Can we get one of those grilled? 1018 00:51:16,783 --> 00:51:17,825 It's fucking good. 1019 00:51:17,909 --> 00:51:19,118 Yeah. Fucking good. 1020 00:51:19,244 --> 00:51:20,787 Just keep a low profile, Ben. 1021 00:51:20,912 --> 00:51:22,072 We'll find our man. No doubt. 1022 00:51:22,121 --> 00:51:23,539 Hundred percent. 1023 00:51:23,873 --> 00:51:26,501 Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, 1024 00:51:26,626 --> 00:51:28,670 welcome to the holliston rodeo. 1025 00:51:28,795 --> 00:51:33,049 We say a special hello to our sponsors, stetson energy, 1026 00:51:33,174 --> 00:51:36,552 mcguane energy, trail ways energy company, 1027 00:51:36,636 --> 00:51:40,139 rawson energy, the t&b energy company, 1028 00:51:40,306 --> 00:51:43,768 panhandle energy, Andrew & sons hardware, 1029 00:51:43,893 --> 00:51:45,812 an energy corporation, 1030 00:51:45,937 --> 00:51:49,399 anderton energy transport, donahue energy, 1031 00:51:49,524 --> 00:51:51,442 and the Quentin sellers music factory, 1032 00:51:51,567 --> 00:51:55,530 making dreams come true since 2018. 1033 00:51:55,905 --> 00:51:59,534 Now, carrying the six beautiful flags of Texas, 1034 00:51:59,659 --> 00:52:02,370 welcome our beautiful riders. 1035 00:52:03,496 --> 00:52:04,580 All right, Ben. 1036 00:52:04,664 --> 00:52:06,416 The six flags of Texas 1037 00:52:06,541 --> 00:52:09,627 are the six countries that Texas has belonged to. 1038 00:52:09,752 --> 00:52:12,297 Can you name all six? Okay. The United States. 1039 00:52:12,422 --> 00:52:15,008 France, Louisiana purchase, Spain, 1040 00:52:15,133 --> 00:52:16,426 Mexico. 1041 00:52:17,260 --> 00:52:18,594 Um, um... 1042 00:52:19,053 --> 00:52:21,222 Republic of Texas! What's that, five? 1043 00:52:21,347 --> 00:52:22,932 Not bad, brother. Not bad. 1044 00:52:23,016 --> 00:52:24,642 Nobody ever gets five. 1045 00:52:27,603 --> 00:52:28,896 Right. 1046 00:52:29,022 --> 00:52:32,066 So six flags, the theme park... 1047 00:52:32,150 --> 00:52:33,151 Exactly. 1048 00:52:33,276 --> 00:52:35,236 Is a Texas company. Right. 1049 00:52:36,821 --> 00:52:38,323 Very interesting. 1050 00:52:39,240 --> 00:52:42,118 And now, ladies and gentlemen, if you're a real texan, 1051 00:52:42,243 --> 00:52:44,954 you know what to do when this song plays. 1052 00:52:50,752 --> 00:52:54,088 Did you really just try to shazam "deep in the heart of Texas"? 1053 00:52:55,757 --> 00:52:58,760 Now, ladies and gentlemen, who here is a die-hard fan 1054 00:52:58,885 --> 00:53:01,387 of the university of Texas? 1055 00:53:01,471 --> 00:53:02,930 Whoo! 1056 00:53:04,932 --> 00:53:07,810 And who here is a fan of Texas tech? 1057 00:53:13,024 --> 00:53:15,068 Okay, let's hear from both sides. 1058 00:53:15,151 --> 00:53:17,362 Can we have the ut fan come down? 1059 00:53:17,487 --> 00:53:19,214 - Good luck, buddy. - Give them hell, Ben. 1060 00:53:19,238 --> 00:53:20,740 Is this for real? Are you serious... 1061 00:53:20,865 --> 00:53:22,408 Do you think we're joking? 1062 00:53:22,533 --> 00:53:25,495 And let's get a Texas tech fan. 1063 00:53:36,381 --> 00:53:39,258 Okay, let's start with Mr. University of Texas. 1064 00:53:40,885 --> 00:53:42,178 Now, what's your name, son? 1065 00:53:42,303 --> 00:53:43,638 Ben manalowitz. 1066 00:53:43,763 --> 00:53:45,014 What the who sit? 1067 00:53:47,850 --> 00:53:49,102 And what do you do, son? 1068 00:53:49,769 --> 00:53:50,853 I'm a writer. 1069 00:53:50,937 --> 00:53:54,023 A rider? You don't look like a rider. What do you ride, son? 1070 00:53:54,273 --> 00:53:55,650 Huh? 1071 00:53:55,775 --> 00:53:57,255 Well, there's lots of kinds of riding. 1072 00:53:57,360 --> 00:54:00,029 You can ride horses, steer, tractors. 1073 00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:03,616 I'm not a rider. I'm a writer. 1074 00:54:05,118 --> 00:54:06,369 I'm a writer. 1075 00:54:08,162 --> 00:54:09,831 So, like, you know, uh... 1076 00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:14,919 When you come across a book or a magazine... 1077 00:54:16,045 --> 00:54:18,506 Or even an article that you read online. 1078 00:54:20,591 --> 00:54:24,470 Somebody has to actually think about what those words... 1079 00:54:24,595 --> 00:54:27,223 I know what a writer is, you condescending asshole. 1080 00:54:29,392 --> 00:54:30,726 Well, tell me, Shakespeare, 1081 00:54:30,810 --> 00:54:34,063 what do you like so much about the university of Texas? 1082 00:54:38,151 --> 00:54:40,528 Well, I like that it's a state school. 1083 00:54:41,028 --> 00:54:43,531 So, it gives financial opportunities 1084 00:54:43,865 --> 00:54:46,242 to local people who could use the help. 1085 00:54:47,368 --> 00:54:50,955 And I know that it has a very good film department. 1086 00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:53,207 Some of the graduates include, 1087 00:54:53,332 --> 00:54:55,626 I believe, Richard link later. 1088 00:54:55,710 --> 00:54:57,253 Uh-huh. Okay. 1089 00:54:57,336 --> 00:54:59,797 And what do you like about Texas tech? 1090 00:55:00,298 --> 00:55:02,842 Quarterback Matt Harris! 1091 00:55:05,595 --> 00:55:07,513 Guns up! Repping tech! 1092 00:55:10,183 --> 00:55:12,518 Shake that thang, make that than 1093 00:55:12,643 --> 00:55:14,538 bend until you think it's gonna break that thang... 1094 00:55:14,562 --> 00:55:15,938 Don't worry about it. 1095 00:55:16,022 --> 00:55:17,773 Nobody's thinking about it. Yeah. 1096 00:55:17,899 --> 00:55:19,817 Erase it from your mind. 1097 00:55:19,901 --> 00:55:20,943 Enjoy. 1098 00:55:21,277 --> 00:55:22,997 When she moves that thang grooves that thang 1099 00:55:23,070 --> 00:55:26,073 swing to the rhythm of the groove that thang 1100 00:55:26,491 --> 00:55:28,159 ooh! Shake it, girls! 1101 00:55:28,284 --> 00:55:29,684 Nobody else does what she does to me 1102 00:55:29,744 --> 00:55:30,828 not you, kc. 1103 00:55:30,953 --> 00:55:32,455 Shake that thang... 1104 00:55:32,580 --> 00:55:36,250 How do they all know how to do the same... 1105 00:55:36,375 --> 00:55:38,252 Collective consciousness. 1106 00:55:38,794 --> 00:55:41,631 Every song is such a sight to see 1107 00:55:41,756 --> 00:55:43,799 when she moves that thang, grooves that thang 1108 00:55:43,925 --> 00:55:45,645 swing to the rhythm of the groove that thang 1109 00:55:47,386 --> 00:55:49,013 Speaks for itself 1110 00:55:49,138 --> 00:55:51,724 nobody else does what she does to me 1111 00:55:51,849 --> 00:55:54,894 when she shakes that thang... 1112 00:55:55,895 --> 00:55:57,146 Sancholo. 1113 00:56:01,609 --> 00:56:02,652 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 1114 00:56:02,735 --> 00:56:04,070 You going over there? Yeah. 1115 00:56:04,195 --> 00:56:06,239 You want my gun? You brought a gun? 1116 00:56:06,489 --> 00:56:08,157 Didn't I? Phone, keys, wallet, gun. 1117 00:56:08,282 --> 00:56:09,534 No.no. Yeah. 1118 00:56:10,076 --> 00:56:12,703 Nobody else does what she does to me 1119 00:56:12,828 --> 00:56:14,997 when she shakes that thang 1120 00:56:15,122 --> 00:56:18,251 swinging like an old screen door 1121 00:56:18,376 --> 00:56:21,254 lord, she makes that thang... 1122 00:56:22,296 --> 00:56:24,590 Excuse me, are you sancholo? 1123 00:56:26,551 --> 00:56:28,386 I was hoping to talk to you for a second. 1124 00:56:28,469 --> 00:56:29,804 You a cop? 1125 00:56:29,887 --> 00:56:31,097 Not a cop. 1126 00:56:31,222 --> 00:56:32,640 Cop don't have to say he's a cop. 1127 00:56:32,765 --> 00:56:34,058 Then why did you ask? 1128 00:56:34,725 --> 00:56:36,394 Right? 'Cause you're wasting my time. 1129 00:56:36,894 --> 00:56:38,854 Figured I might as well waste yours. 1130 00:56:38,980 --> 00:56:40,231 Look, I'm a journalist. 1131 00:56:40,356 --> 00:56:41,399 I'm doing a story. 1132 00:56:41,482 --> 00:56:43,776 I was really only hoping to ask you a couple of questions. 1133 00:56:43,901 --> 00:56:45,504 I'm just trying to... Just trying to what? 1134 00:56:45,528 --> 00:56:47,154 - Fucking killer! - Hey, Ty. Relax! 1135 00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:48,948 Guys, guys, guys, guys. Whoa, whoa, who! 1136 00:56:50,992 --> 00:56:53,369 Go easy on him. He just lost his sister. 1137 00:56:54,662 --> 00:56:56,539 Most beautiful girl in Texas. 1138 00:56:56,664 --> 00:56:58,499 So what I heard was that you were at the party 1139 00:56:58,624 --> 00:56:59,959 where she died. 1140 00:57:00,626 --> 00:57:01,711 Lucky me. 1141 00:57:02,295 --> 00:57:05,464 She took her last breath on my shoulder. 1142 00:57:08,551 --> 00:57:11,971 My name is Ben manalowitz. I'm doing a podcast about abilene. 1143 00:57:12,054 --> 00:57:14,640 I would love to hear your side of the story. 1144 00:57:15,725 --> 00:57:16,726 Hey. 1145 00:57:17,268 --> 00:57:18,894 We got a regular Joe rogan here. 1146 00:57:19,353 --> 00:57:21,355 Joe rogan meets Seth Rogen. 1147 00:57:26,152 --> 00:57:27,320 Just you. 1148 00:58:03,689 --> 00:58:05,316 When I was in middle school, 1149 00:58:06,359 --> 00:58:09,487 my mom wouldn't let me read Harry Potter 1150 00:58:09,612 --> 00:58:11,155 because of church stuff. 1151 00:58:12,406 --> 00:58:15,951 So I would call Abby every night. 1152 00:58:17,578 --> 00:58:19,288 She would read it to me. 1153 00:58:23,918 --> 00:58:25,878 I don't know what made her care about me. 1154 00:58:26,504 --> 00:58:30,341 I was like, "why me? I'm just an effing dropout drug dealer." 1155 00:58:30,466 --> 00:58:33,761 She'd say, "heart sees heart." 1156 00:58:34,595 --> 00:58:35,846 Right. 1157 00:58:35,971 --> 00:58:37,723 She used to text that to me 1158 00:58:37,807 --> 00:58:41,686 every day on that dumb-ass little razr phone. 1159 00:58:42,061 --> 00:58:43,437 You remember those? Yeah. 1160 00:58:43,938 --> 00:58:45,272 5-4-5. 1161 00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:50,569 5-4-5. Heart sees heart. It was, like, her little code. 1162 00:58:54,156 --> 00:58:55,491 I miss her so much. 1163 00:58:56,909 --> 00:58:59,578 You told me that her last breath was on your shoulder. 1164 00:59:00,329 --> 00:59:03,290 And other people told me that you threw the party where she died. 1165 00:59:03,374 --> 00:59:04,750 I wasn't even there. 1166 00:59:06,001 --> 00:59:07,086 Okay. 1167 00:59:08,838 --> 00:59:10,214 Where were you? 1168 00:59:16,053 --> 00:59:17,388 Look at the date. 1169 00:59:24,228 --> 00:59:25,271 Where is this? 1170 00:59:25,396 --> 00:59:27,189 Tulsa. I went to see Adele. 1171 00:59:30,151 --> 00:59:32,778 I was there with my niece. She loves her. 1172 00:59:33,112 --> 00:59:34,113 Adele? 1173 00:59:34,196 --> 00:59:37,032 Obviously, I'm gonna have to kill you if you tell anyone about that. 1174 00:59:37,158 --> 00:59:38,451 No, it's... 1175 00:59:39,577 --> 00:59:40,870 Yeah. 1176 00:59:40,995 --> 00:59:42,288 Pmahn 1177 00:59:45,374 --> 00:59:49,253 so... you have an alibi, 1178 00:59:49,378 --> 00:59:51,714 but you want people to think you killed her? 1179 00:59:51,797 --> 00:59:53,424 These fucking cartels, man. 1180 00:59:53,549 --> 00:59:55,193 They're gonna control everything pretty soon. 1181 00:59:55,217 --> 00:59:57,595 You're the cartels. No, sir. 1182 00:59:58,304 --> 01:00:01,182 It kills me to claim her, but I don't know. 1183 01:00:03,392 --> 01:00:05,770 If they don't actually think I killed someone, 1184 01:00:05,853 --> 01:00:07,855 then I might have to kill someone 1185 01:00:09,732 --> 01:00:10,983 To prove myself. 1186 01:00:11,358 --> 01:00:14,028 That's not really how it works, is it? It's what I heard. 1187 01:00:14,153 --> 01:00:15,738 Go on snopes. It's not a real thing. 1188 01:00:15,821 --> 01:00:16,822 Excuse me? 1189 01:00:18,324 --> 01:00:20,659 So, let me piece this together. She od'd... 1190 01:00:20,785 --> 01:00:22,953 The fuck? This is Abby we're talking about here, okay? 1191 01:00:23,037 --> 01:00:24,455 She wouldn't touch the stuff. 1192 01:00:24,538 --> 01:00:25,831 Girl wouldn't touch an advil. 1193 01:00:28,083 --> 01:00:31,337 Listen, they found her two and a half miles from the party, 1194 01:00:31,420 --> 01:00:34,256 at a spot where all the deaths happen called "the after-party." 1195 01:00:34,381 --> 01:00:36,884 You don't just wander off like that by yourself. 1196 01:00:37,593 --> 01:00:39,011 Someone takes you there. 1197 01:00:40,930 --> 01:00:42,515 This was no od. 1198 01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:43,766 No fucking way. 1199 01:00:46,685 --> 01:00:48,395 Who goes to these parties? 1200 01:00:48,687 --> 01:00:49,855 Everybody. 1201 01:00:49,980 --> 01:00:51,899 Everybody goes. Nobody went. Yeah. 1202 01:00:53,442 --> 01:00:55,236 Same people every time? Yes. 1203 01:00:57,321 --> 01:00:58,531 When's the next one? 1204 01:00:59,824 --> 01:01:01,116 Whenever I want. 1205 01:01:10,251 --> 01:01:11,836 You're at 11%, bro. 1206 01:01:12,628 --> 01:01:14,588 You might want to switch to low power mode. 1207 01:01:15,881 --> 01:01:17,216 Thank you. 1208 01:01:30,563 --> 01:01:31,564 Hello? 1209 01:01:32,439 --> 01:01:33,691 What if she was murdered? 1210 01:01:35,901 --> 01:01:36,902 What? 1211 01:01:36,986 --> 01:01:38,506 We dismissed the first theory presented 1212 01:01:38,571 --> 01:01:39,756 without even thinking about it. 1213 01:01:39,780 --> 01:01:41,574 What if we're not taking them seriously? 1214 01:01:41,699 --> 01:01:45,828 Wait, so are you saying the Mexican drug dealer did it? 1215 01:01:46,370 --> 01:01:47,496 Definitely not that. 1216 01:01:47,705 --> 01:01:49,540 But that was the first theory presented. 1217 01:01:49,623 --> 01:01:51,375 I'm just sure it wasn't that. 1218 01:01:52,835 --> 01:01:54,295 Why are you so sure? 1219 01:01:54,879 --> 01:01:55,921 Gut. 1220 01:01:56,422 --> 01:01:57,673 Gut? Look, 1221 01:01:57,798 --> 01:01:59,425 I know we liked what we had before. 1222 01:01:59,550 --> 01:02:02,344 Something about america and fantasy and regret 1223 01:02:02,469 --> 01:02:03,762 and the meaning of vengeance. 1224 01:02:03,888 --> 01:02:06,432 No, no. This... this is better. 1225 01:02:08,517 --> 01:02:10,157 This just keeps getting bigger and bigger. 1226 01:02:11,186 --> 01:02:12,313 Right? 1227 01:02:12,438 --> 01:02:13,480 Okay. 1228 01:02:13,856 --> 01:02:15,065 Stay safe. 1229 01:02:15,190 --> 01:02:16,650 Get the story. 1230 01:02:17,067 --> 01:02:18,193 Not in that order. 1231 01:02:18,277 --> 01:02:20,070 No. In that order. 1232 01:02:49,391 --> 01:02:50,935 What are you watching? 1233 01:02:52,645 --> 01:02:54,063 Videos ofabilene. 1234 01:02:58,442 --> 01:02:59,735 Do you see my phone? 1235 01:03:01,195 --> 01:03:02,613 How it's, like, cracked. 1236 01:03:03,155 --> 01:03:04,156 Yeah. 1237 01:03:04,239 --> 01:03:07,159 It makes me look the way that I feel. 1238 01:03:14,124 --> 01:03:15,459 Where do I know you from? 1239 01:03:16,085 --> 01:03:18,796 Rodeo. It's the longhorns fan. 1240 01:03:18,879 --> 01:03:21,298 Indeed it is, Mike. Indeed it is. 1241 01:03:21,382 --> 01:03:22,859 Actually, that was a misunderstanding. 1242 01:03:22,883 --> 01:03:24,593 I'm sorry. I'm not even a football fan. 1243 01:03:24,718 --> 01:03:26,428 Uh, lwasjust trying to fit in. 1244 01:03:26,512 --> 01:03:28,180 Funny way to fit in around here. 1245 01:03:28,681 --> 01:03:29,682 Point taken. 1246 01:03:29,765 --> 01:03:32,059 I didn't know there was gonna be another team. 1247 01:03:32,184 --> 01:03:33,894 I was cheering for Texas. 1248 01:03:37,731 --> 01:03:40,651 I'd love to ask you a couple questions about the death ofabilene Shaw. 1249 01:03:40,776 --> 01:03:42,152 Od'd. Accident. 1250 01:03:42,277 --> 01:03:43,696 I know that was the official report. 1251 01:03:43,821 --> 01:03:45,701 I was wondering, were you able to talk to anyone 1252 01:03:45,739 --> 01:03:47,157 who was there the night she died? 1253 01:03:48,200 --> 01:03:50,452 You ever go to a party out by the pump Jacks? 1254 01:03:51,245 --> 01:03:53,998 Everybody goes and nobody was there. 1255 01:03:54,123 --> 01:03:56,709 I wasn't there. I wasn't there. 1256 01:03:59,586 --> 01:04:01,380 Why are you so interested anyway? 1257 01:04:01,505 --> 01:04:03,465 You her boyfriend or something? 1258 01:04:05,801 --> 01:04:07,386 We hung out. 1259 01:04:08,178 --> 01:04:09,596 Yeah. Yeah, I was her boyfriend. 1260 01:04:09,680 --> 01:04:12,033 Well, you know, 90% of the time it's the boyfriend who did it. 1261 01:04:12,057 --> 01:04:13,726 Okay, I wasn't really her boyfriend. 1262 01:04:13,851 --> 01:04:16,061 His story's starting to sound a little inconsistent. 1263 01:04:16,186 --> 01:04:18,063 Swiss cheese. 1264 01:04:18,147 --> 01:04:20,941 Yeah, I'm not trying to cause any problems here. 1265 01:04:21,066 --> 01:04:22,735 I'm really just trying to help the family. 1266 01:04:22,818 --> 01:04:25,237 You know, this isn't even our jurisdiction anyways. 1267 01:04:26,447 --> 01:04:29,575 Party happened outside city limits. That's county, not city. 1268 01:04:29,700 --> 01:04:31,201 County sheriff. Sheriff'll talk. 1269 01:04:31,326 --> 01:04:32,536 Sheriff's a politician. 1270 01:04:33,037 --> 01:04:34,329 Ain't that a fact. 1271 01:04:34,413 --> 01:04:36,165 I'd love to help you, son, but our policy is 1272 01:04:36,248 --> 01:04:38,876 we can't comment on our process or cases. 1273 01:04:39,626 --> 01:04:42,171 Well, I was interviewing people for a podcast 1274 01:04:42,296 --> 01:04:43,936 that could be heard by millions of people. 1275 01:04:43,964 --> 01:04:46,425 Butlguess that's not a possibility. 1276 01:04:47,217 --> 01:04:48,697 These are oxy sticks. 1277 01:04:48,761 --> 01:04:50,220 See how the pills are squared off? 1278 01:04:50,304 --> 01:04:52,931 That way, they can pack 'em in boxes to the corners 1279 01:04:53,015 --> 01:04:54,892 without wasting any space. 1280 01:04:55,017 --> 01:04:56,685 That's how big this business is. 1281 01:04:56,810 --> 01:04:58,079 We don't know who's shipping it. 1282 01:04:58,103 --> 01:05:00,063 All we know is they're coming along the interstate 1283 01:05:00,105 --> 01:05:01,231 right along the border. 1284 01:05:01,315 --> 01:05:03,442 And that route cuts right by the oilfield 1285 01:05:03,567 --> 01:05:04,860 where the party was. 1286 01:05:04,943 --> 01:05:06,663 The most common overdose spot in the county. 1287 01:05:06,737 --> 01:05:08,238 We call it "the after-party." 1288 01:05:09,323 --> 01:05:10,783 Very common thing, sad to say. 1289 01:05:12,159 --> 01:05:13,744 What's this right here? 1290 01:05:13,869 --> 01:05:16,246 Looks like two pairs of prints. 1291 01:05:16,330 --> 01:05:17,372 Cowboy boots. 1292 01:05:18,832 --> 01:05:21,502 Calling out an apb to find two men wearing cowboy boots. 1293 01:05:24,713 --> 01:05:26,113 - Okay. - What the fuck? 1294 01:05:26,215 --> 01:05:27,424 Stand down. 1295 01:05:28,717 --> 01:05:31,053 Son, I wish you well, I really do. 1296 01:05:31,136 --> 01:05:34,139 And bless your little heart, but this ain't even our jurisdiction, though. 1297 01:05:35,224 --> 01:05:36,433 It's not? No, sir. 1298 01:05:36,517 --> 01:05:38,143 This was along the highway. 1299 01:05:38,268 --> 01:05:40,062 You want to talk to highway patrol. 1300 01:05:41,105 --> 01:05:43,305 Well, ain't that just like a sheriff to puff his hot air 1301 01:05:43,357 --> 01:05:45,442 and blow you straight into my office. 1302 01:05:45,567 --> 01:05:48,779 If there's a drug overdose at a party in some fucking field off 29, 1303 01:05:48,862 --> 01:05:51,156 I'm sorry, but we got shit to do. 1304 01:05:51,240 --> 01:05:54,660 We're not a bunch of army rejects just gazing at the rio grande. 1305 01:05:54,785 --> 01:05:56,912 I never said that you were. I wasn't talking about us. 1306 01:05:57,037 --> 01:05:59,498 Oh, is that what they told you over at highway patrol? 1307 01:05:59,623 --> 01:06:03,418 You can go tell junior brown and the rest of them glorified meter maids 1308 01:06:03,544 --> 01:06:05,963 that if they spent more time with their real guns 1309 01:06:06,088 --> 01:06:07,840 and less with their radar guns, 1310 01:06:07,965 --> 01:06:10,467 we might not have to chase the goddamn Texas syndicate 1311 01:06:10,592 --> 01:06:13,178 up and down the trans-pecos! Got it? 1312 01:06:13,303 --> 01:06:16,807 Yes. If I find a natural way to work that into the conversation with them, 1313 01:06:16,890 --> 01:06:17,933 I will do that. 1314 01:06:18,058 --> 01:06:19,852 Drt. Drt. 1315 01:06:19,935 --> 01:06:21,812 Drt. Dead right there. 1316 01:06:22,688 --> 01:06:24,773 Law enforcement was no help at all. 1317 01:06:25,399 --> 01:06:27,568 You're learning a lot down there, aren't you? 1318 01:06:27,651 --> 01:06:30,404 The murder or overdose happened where a lot 1319 01:06:30,487 --> 01:06:31,655 of these things happen. 1320 01:06:31,738 --> 01:06:34,366 At the intersection of four overlapping jurisdictions. 1321 01:06:34,449 --> 01:06:37,077 So they all kicked it to each other. What are the odds? 1322 01:06:37,703 --> 01:06:39,288 What are the odds? 1323 01:06:40,289 --> 01:06:41,832 Okay, I'm gonna kick this around 1324 01:06:41,957 --> 01:06:44,418 with the team for a little bit, shake up the boggle board, 1325 01:06:44,501 --> 01:06:47,212 and then I'm gonna hit up Robin to get her thoughts. 1326 01:06:47,337 --> 01:06:49,715 All right. Thanks, Eloise. Thanks, everybody. 1327 01:06:49,798 --> 01:06:51,341 Bye, Ben. Bye, Ben. 1328 01:06:55,971 --> 01:06:56,972 Um... 1329 01:06:57,890 --> 01:07:00,017 You're probably not even gonna watch this, 1330 01:07:00,100 --> 01:07:04,229 but I'm back home in Texas, and I'm bored. 1331 01:07:05,522 --> 01:07:07,149 This is my little brother, Mason. 1332 01:07:07,816 --> 01:07:10,444 He sleeps on my floor because he's afraid of ghosts. 1333 01:07:10,527 --> 01:07:12,487 And I tried to tell him 1334 01:07:12,613 --> 01:07:14,907 there's no such thing as ghosts, but whatever. 1335 01:07:14,990 --> 01:07:16,533 It keeps him close to me. 1336 01:07:17,993 --> 01:07:20,329 So I guess it's not all bad being here. 1337 01:07:21,455 --> 01:07:22,581 That's... 1338 01:07:23,498 --> 01:07:24,833 Well, that's it. 1339 01:07:32,758 --> 01:07:33,759 Mason. 1340 01:07:35,427 --> 01:07:36,553 Yes, sir? 1341 01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:42,935 Just saying good night. 1342 01:07:43,060 --> 01:07:45,729 You woke me up just to say good night? 1343 01:07:47,981 --> 01:07:49,107 Yes, sir. 1344 01:07:54,112 --> 01:07:55,781 I love you mucho. 1345 01:07:58,617 --> 01:07:59,910 Collective consciousness. 1346 01:08:00,535 --> 01:08:02,579 If everyone believes the same thing... 1347 01:08:04,665 --> 01:08:06,583 But without any facts to support it, 1348 01:08:06,667 --> 01:08:09,378 do we listen to that intuition or dismiss it? 1349 01:08:09,461 --> 01:08:10,587 An overdose? 1350 01:08:10,671 --> 01:08:12,482 Girl never took so much as an advil in her life. 1351 01:08:12,506 --> 01:08:14,150 She never touched so much as an advil. 1352 01:08:14,174 --> 01:08:16,110 You ever go to a party out by the pump Jacks? 1353 01:08:16,134 --> 01:08:17,511 Nobody went. 1354 01:08:17,594 --> 01:08:18,595 I wasn't there. 1355 01:08:20,847 --> 01:08:22,992 The problem is you get all these bright, creative lights 1356 01:08:23,016 --> 01:08:24,601 and nowhere to plug in their energy. 1357 01:08:24,685 --> 01:08:26,770 And so it gets channeled into conspiracy theories 1358 01:08:26,853 --> 01:08:27,896 and drugs and violence. 1359 01:08:27,980 --> 01:08:30,274 I came here to find out why people in grief 1360 01:08:30,357 --> 01:08:31,692 would choose to believe a myth. 1361 01:08:31,775 --> 01:08:33,860 I don't know shit about how this all connects, 1362 01:08:33,986 --> 01:08:35,612 but you bet your ass it does. 1363 01:08:35,696 --> 01:08:37,322 Ms-13? La line a? 1364 01:08:37,447 --> 01:08:39,366 Yeah, I'm familiar with la line a. 1365 01:08:39,491 --> 01:08:41,410 They actually murdered 41 journalists last year. 1366 01:08:41,535 --> 01:08:43,412 They've done bad things, too. 1367 01:08:50,502 --> 01:08:52,129 But now I find myself wondering 1368 01:08:52,212 --> 01:08:55,257 how much truth might be embedded in that intuition. 1369 01:08:55,382 --> 01:08:57,509 You don't happen to know her phone password, do you? 1370 01:08:57,592 --> 01:08:59,469 Took it to every geek squad in the state. 1371 01:08:59,594 --> 01:09:00,804 It's impossible to crack. 1372 01:09:00,887 --> 01:09:02,639 This ain't us. You got the wrong department. 1373 01:09:02,723 --> 01:09:04,057 Highway patrol. Mike and Dan. 1374 01:09:04,141 --> 01:09:05,767 Border patrol. Sheriff's department. 1375 01:09:05,851 --> 01:09:08,228 - You want county. - Every thing's bigger in Texas, 1376 01:09:08,353 --> 01:09:11,523 including your expectations and its reality. 1377 01:09:12,524 --> 01:09:14,401 I'm your host, Ben manalowitz, 1378 01:09:14,526 --> 01:09:18,238 and from American radio collective, this is abilene. 1379 01:09:19,573 --> 01:09:22,075 Hey. Guess who's on the line. 1380 01:09:22,200 --> 01:09:23,577 Hey. It's Robin. 1381 01:09:23,702 --> 01:09:25,078 I produce American moment. 1382 01:09:25,162 --> 01:09:27,080 Yeah. I know who you are. 1383 01:09:27,205 --> 01:09:28,832 It's great to meet you, Robin. 1384 01:09:28,915 --> 01:09:30,500 How are you? Great to talk to you. 1385 01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:32,836 I love what you're doing with "dead white girl". 1386 01:09:32,919 --> 01:09:34,588 Thank you. Thank you so much. 1387 01:09:35,213 --> 01:09:37,215 Eloise pitched that we use some of the story 1388 01:09:37,341 --> 01:09:39,259 as a segment on American moment, 1389 01:09:39,384 --> 01:09:41,261 and that would help promote your series. 1390 01:09:41,345 --> 01:09:43,180 Wow. So it'd be on American moment? 1391 01:09:43,305 --> 01:09:44,907 Everything you're getting is great. 1392 01:09:44,931 --> 01:09:46,350 The characters are amazing. 1393 01:09:46,433 --> 01:09:48,518 Yeah. No, I mean, the characters are unbelievable. 1394 01:09:48,643 --> 01:09:50,062 Ty is just a total firecracker. 1395 01:09:50,187 --> 01:09:52,356 And granny deserves her own show. 1396 01:09:52,439 --> 01:09:54,358 And then abilene, I mean... 1397 01:09:55,442 --> 01:09:56,693 The more people hear her voice, 1398 01:09:56,818 --> 01:09:58,653 the more they're gonna fall in love with her. 1399 01:09:58,779 --> 01:10:01,156 So if you think you can tighten up what you have, 1400 01:10:01,239 --> 01:10:03,700 we can work it into Sunday's episode. 1401 01:10:05,118 --> 01:10:07,954 Yeah. I... absolutely. Pdloveto. 1402 01:10:08,080 --> 01:10:09,956 Wow. Yeah, I can do that. 1403 01:10:10,415 --> 01:10:12,084 Can I ask what you're eating? 1404 01:10:12,584 --> 01:10:13,877 This is frito pie. 1405 01:10:14,002 --> 01:10:15,295 It's great sound. 1406 01:10:15,379 --> 01:10:16,421 What is that? 1407 01:10:17,422 --> 01:10:20,384 Frito pie is when they cut open a bag of fritos 1408 01:10:20,509 --> 01:10:21,551 and they pour chili in it. 1409 01:10:21,635 --> 01:10:23,237 Then you eat it out of the bag with a fork. 1410 01:10:23,261 --> 01:10:24,304 Ugh, that is disgusting. 1411 01:10:24,429 --> 01:10:25,555 Yeah, in a good way. 1412 01:10:28,058 --> 01:10:29,309 Ben, are you there? 1413 01:10:30,852 --> 01:10:32,312 Ben, did I lose you? 1414 01:10:39,861 --> 01:10:41,405 What happened to you, son? 1415 01:10:42,739 --> 01:10:44,324 My prius exploded. 1416 01:10:45,033 --> 01:10:46,451 Mm-hmm. 1417 01:10:50,539 --> 01:10:52,707 Oh, thank heavens. Are you all right? 1418 01:10:52,791 --> 01:10:53,792 Hey. 1419 01:10:53,917 --> 01:10:55,293 Yeah. Look at that. 1420 01:10:55,419 --> 01:10:56,920 Hey vvhathappened? 1421 01:10:57,045 --> 01:10:59,589 I'm fine. His car blew up, mom! 1422 01:10:59,714 --> 01:11:00,841 It's so fucked up! This... 1423 01:11:00,966 --> 01:11:02,467 Tyler Clayton! Sorry. 1424 01:11:02,592 --> 01:11:04,152 We're just so grateful you're all right. 1425 01:11:04,177 --> 01:11:07,681 Oh, my god. What if you were driving a real car with gas and stuff? 1426 01:11:09,641 --> 01:11:10,642 Yeah. 1427 01:11:10,725 --> 01:11:13,186 Ben, this is a message that we're getting close. 1428 01:11:13,311 --> 01:11:17,107 Or it's kids fucking around for no reason with tannerite. 1429 01:11:22,320 --> 01:11:24,030 I can't believe you're all here. 1430 01:11:24,114 --> 01:11:25,907 Well, where else would we be? 1431 01:11:26,908 --> 01:11:28,952 Come on. The girls are waiting in the car. 1432 01:11:29,953 --> 01:11:31,121 Let's go. 1433 01:11:31,204 --> 01:11:32,622 Hey, are you limping? No. 1434 01:11:32,747 --> 01:11:33,832 You sure about that? 1435 01:11:33,915 --> 01:11:35,792 Come on, mama. His face looks all right. 1436 01:11:35,917 --> 01:11:37,637 He's gonna be all right. Yeah, I seen worse. 1437 01:11:37,711 --> 01:11:38,837 Come on, buddy. 1438 01:11:40,172 --> 01:11:41,732 - How is everything? - So good. 1439 01:11:41,756 --> 01:11:42,900 This is our friend Ben. 1440 01:11:42,924 --> 01:11:44,926 And this is his first time at what a burger. 1441 01:11:47,471 --> 01:11:48,930 Let's have a toast. Thank you. 1442 01:11:49,055 --> 01:11:50,307 To Ben. Come on, to Ben. 1443 01:11:50,390 --> 01:11:51,826 What a burger, what a burger. To a good milkshake. 1444 01:11:51,850 --> 01:11:52,976 Over there. 1445 01:11:53,101 --> 01:11:54,102 Thanks. 1446 01:11:55,562 --> 01:11:57,564 Well, what do you think? 1447 01:11:58,773 --> 01:12:00,650 I love this. You do? 1448 01:12:02,068 --> 01:12:04,946 And it's always right there. 1449 01:12:10,744 --> 01:12:11,995 Excuse me, mama. 1450 01:12:14,789 --> 01:12:15,869 It's a Texas thing. 1451 01:12:15,916 --> 01:12:18,236 You're not supposed to do it, but you're supposed to do it. 1452 01:12:18,376 --> 01:12:20,016 You're supposed to take your lucky number, 1453 01:12:20,086 --> 01:12:22,506 but we figure every number's lucky to somebody, 1454 01:12:22,589 --> 01:12:23,715 so we take all of 'em. 1455 01:12:23,840 --> 01:12:25,258 I won't tell Mike and Dan. 1456 01:12:25,383 --> 01:12:26,468 Like they'd do anything. 1457 01:12:26,593 --> 01:12:27,969 They'd say it was an accident. 1458 01:12:29,763 --> 01:12:30,805 Party tonight. 1459 01:12:30,931 --> 01:12:32,307 Oh. What's the dress code? 1460 01:12:32,390 --> 01:12:34,684 Broncos and buckle bunnies. 1461 01:12:34,935 --> 01:12:36,787 You know, they're seriously phoning it in 1462 01:12:36,811 --> 01:12:38,021 with the themes nowadays. 1463 01:12:38,563 --> 01:12:41,000 You want to come tonight? You can borrow something from my closet. 1464 01:12:41,024 --> 01:12:42,150 You're okay to go? 1465 01:12:42,234 --> 01:12:44,236 It doesn't stir up too many feelings for you? 1466 01:12:46,863 --> 01:12:48,240 You gotta keep living life. 1467 01:12:48,365 --> 01:12:49,866 Like Catherine the great said, 1468 01:12:49,991 --> 01:12:52,035 you gotta get right back under the horse. 1469 01:12:53,703 --> 01:12:55,330 Tyler Clayton. What? 1470 01:12:55,413 --> 01:12:59,125 I listened to that history podcast you recommended. 1471 01:12:59,209 --> 01:13:00,585 I've got a question for you. 1472 01:13:00,669 --> 01:13:02,462 Have you got family in Texas? 1473 01:13:03,713 --> 01:13:04,923 You do now. 1474 01:13:05,632 --> 01:13:07,717 - Isn't that right, everybody? - Yes, ma'am. 1475 01:13:07,842 --> 01:13:09,469 Careful what you wish for, Ben. 1476 01:13:14,599 --> 01:13:15,600 One second. 1477 01:13:15,684 --> 01:13:17,686 Who's got a honey thing over there? 1478 01:13:17,769 --> 01:13:20,105 I got some right here. Anybody? 1479 01:13:20,230 --> 01:13:22,399 Hey. What's up? Hey. 1480 01:13:22,691 --> 01:13:24,025 Your car blew up? 1481 01:13:24,150 --> 01:13:25,527 Are you okay? 1482 01:13:25,652 --> 01:13:26,987 Yeah. Yes. 1483 01:13:27,070 --> 01:13:29,364 I mean, lwish I got that extra rental insurance 1484 01:13:29,489 --> 01:13:31,533 that no one ever gets, but I'm fine. 1485 01:13:31,658 --> 01:13:34,786 Good. Well, listen, I finished it, and everyone loves it. 1486 01:13:34,911 --> 01:13:36,788 Thanks. What do you mean "finished it"? 1487 01:13:36,871 --> 01:13:38,039 You're clearly in danger, 1488 01:13:38,164 --> 01:13:40,250 and you've already got everything you need. 1489 01:13:41,293 --> 01:13:43,753 Well, I didn't solve the murder. 1490 01:13:44,462 --> 01:13:46,089 It's better this way. 1491 01:13:46,214 --> 01:13:49,509 You know, an ambiguous ending without resolution. 1492 01:13:49,593 --> 01:13:53,680 Thats_. That's the secret weapon with a story like this. 1493 01:13:53,763 --> 01:13:55,056 It gnaws at you. 1494 01:13:55,140 --> 01:13:57,309 It haunts you forever. 1495 01:13:57,434 --> 01:13:58,685 You never let it go. 1496 01:13:58,810 --> 01:14:00,228 No, there's more to it, Eloise. 1497 01:14:00,312 --> 01:14:01,313 I'm getting so close. 1498 01:14:01,438 --> 01:14:02,856 As much as we'd love to see you 1499 01:14:02,981 --> 01:14:04,649 blown up for a story... no, no. 1500 01:14:04,733 --> 01:14:08,361 My conscience tells me I have to choose a person over a story. 1501 01:14:10,238 --> 01:14:11,281 No, no. 1502 01:14:11,364 --> 01:14:14,826 Otherwise, it would take, like, two years of therapy 1503 01:14:15,201 --> 01:14:17,203 to justify it, and... 1504 01:14:17,829 --> 01:14:19,623 I can't afford that on my plan. 1505 01:14:20,165 --> 01:14:22,459 Look, you're gonna be huge from this. 1506 01:14:22,542 --> 01:14:23,668 Okay? 1507 01:14:23,752 --> 01:14:24,878 Come home. 1508 01:14:29,549 --> 01:14:31,092 You remember? Hey, you. 1509 01:14:31,217 --> 01:14:32,969 Hey. Sorry about that. 1510 01:14:33,428 --> 01:14:34,512 Who was that? 1511 01:14:35,096 --> 01:14:36,473 Fhend. 1512 01:14:36,598 --> 01:14:38,308 Was it equinox girl cute? 1513 01:14:38,391 --> 01:14:40,018 Or was it Natalie bumble? 1514 01:14:40,143 --> 01:14:41,895 It was my podcast producer. 1515 01:14:42,354 --> 01:14:44,272 And everything's on track. 1516 01:14:45,315 --> 01:14:46,816 You're very sweet to ask. 1517 01:14:47,025 --> 01:14:48,401 I love you mucho. 1518 01:14:48,526 --> 01:14:50,695 We're so lucky you found abilene. 1519 01:14:52,197 --> 01:14:54,449 I really don't know what she saw in me. 1520 01:14:54,532 --> 01:14:55,533 I do. 1521 01:14:55,617 --> 01:14:57,202 I get it. I totally get it. 1522 01:14:58,662 --> 01:15:00,163 Heart sees heart. 1523 01:15:01,748 --> 01:15:06,169 You know, when I came down here to spend time with Abby's... 1524 01:15:06,294 --> 01:15:09,005 "Crazy texan family," right? Yeah. 1525 01:15:10,048 --> 01:15:12,676 I never thought it would be like this. 1526 01:15:13,218 --> 01:15:14,636 People can surprise you. 1527 01:15:15,220 --> 01:15:16,304 Yeah. 1528 01:15:16,429 --> 01:15:17,764 Like abilene. 1529 01:15:17,889 --> 01:15:19,349 I mean, she was full of surprises. 1530 01:15:19,432 --> 01:15:20,809 Like abilene. 1531 01:15:20,934 --> 01:15:24,354 Great reputation, but a huge pill-popper. 1532 01:15:29,943 --> 01:15:31,319 What? 1533 01:15:31,444 --> 01:15:32,862 What'd you just say? 1534 01:15:32,987 --> 01:15:35,073 Put that in your podcast, maybe. 1535 01:15:35,198 --> 01:15:36,616 Where'd you hear that? 1536 01:15:36,741 --> 01:15:38,034 The girls told me. 1537 01:15:44,791 --> 01:15:46,710 Ty told us not to say anything. 1538 01:16:01,182 --> 01:16:02,851 Are you fucking serious? 1539 01:16:03,893 --> 01:16:06,521 I thought you wouldn't do this with me 1540 01:16:06,646 --> 01:16:08,565 if you knew that she was using. 1541 01:16:08,648 --> 01:16:09,899 You think? 1542 01:16:09,983 --> 01:16:12,444 Drugs was something abilene did. It's not who she was. 1543 01:16:12,569 --> 01:16:13,903 But it is how she died, 1544 01:16:14,028 --> 01:16:15,822 which is what we were invesfigafing. 1545 01:16:15,905 --> 01:16:17,198 I thought there was more to this. 1546 01:16:17,282 --> 01:16:19,218 I thought that you and I would get to know each other, 1547 01:16:19,242 --> 01:16:20,285 and that would be cool. 1548 01:16:20,827 --> 01:16:23,163 I... maybe it was part of the grieving process. 1549 01:16:23,246 --> 01:16:24,247 Denial? 1550 01:16:24,372 --> 01:16:26,332 Isn't that one of the 12 steps of grief? 1551 01:16:26,458 --> 01:16:28,626 It's five stages of grief, 12 steps to recovery, 1552 01:16:28,752 --> 01:16:31,472 but I understand that everyone here is more familiar with the latter. 1553 01:16:31,546 --> 01:16:32,714 It's complicated. 1554 01:16:32,839 --> 01:16:34,382 It's not. It's actually very simple. 1555 01:16:34,466 --> 01:16:37,469 Everything here is actually really simple, 1556 01:16:37,594 --> 01:16:40,638 and maybe that's why it took me so long to understand it. 1557 01:16:42,307 --> 01:16:45,226 Well, I was following my heart, and that's what we do around here. 1558 01:16:45,935 --> 01:16:47,020 You follow your heart. 1559 01:16:47,145 --> 01:16:48,480 Yeah. 1560 01:16:49,564 --> 01:16:51,816 Well, maybe it's time to look around 1561 01:16:51,941 --> 01:16:54,694 and ask yourselves how that's working out for you. 1562 01:16:54,944 --> 01:16:57,864 Maybe you should try following your brain for a change. 1563 01:16:57,947 --> 01:16:59,908 Because when you follow your heart, 1564 01:17:00,074 --> 01:17:03,912 the earth is flat, climate change is a hoax, 1565 01:17:03,995 --> 01:17:06,414 vaccines contain microchips, 1566 01:17:06,539 --> 01:17:10,001 and Mexican drug dealers killed your sister. 1567 01:17:10,084 --> 01:17:13,087 You invent these insane fucking narratives 1568 01:17:13,213 --> 01:17:15,465 to explain why your lives are such shit shows 1569 01:17:15,590 --> 01:17:18,384 because the truth is too scary for you to face, 1570 01:17:18,510 --> 01:17:21,304 which is that you did it to yourselves. 1571 01:17:21,387 --> 01:17:23,807 Do you know what people say about you guys where I'm from? 1572 01:17:24,474 --> 01:17:26,518 Let me guess. Bad things. No. Worse. 1573 01:17:27,060 --> 01:17:28,353 We say good things. 1574 01:17:28,478 --> 01:17:30,956 "We took them seriously when we should've taken them literally." 1575 01:17:30,980 --> 01:17:31,981 You're neither. 1576 01:17:32,106 --> 01:17:33,691 You're not serious people. 1577 01:17:33,817 --> 01:17:35,735 And maybe it's time for you all 1578 01:17:35,819 --> 01:17:37,946 to take us seriously and literally 1579 01:17:38,071 --> 01:17:41,241 because where I'm from is fun and interesting. 1580 01:17:41,324 --> 01:17:43,993 And the people are rich and diverse, 1581 01:17:44,118 --> 01:17:48,832 and, meanwhile, your town looks like this! 1582 01:17:48,957 --> 01:17:50,291 Bless your heart. 1583 01:17:50,416 --> 01:17:51,835 Oh. And I know what that means. 1584 01:17:51,918 --> 01:17:54,003 So you know what? Bless your heart. 1585 01:17:54,087 --> 01:17:56,172 Bless your heart. Bless all your hearts. 1586 01:17:56,256 --> 01:17:58,299 All your hearts can go bless themselves. 1587 01:17:58,424 --> 01:17:59,968 Who are you to talk to us? 1588 01:18:01,010 --> 01:18:04,222 I had to drag you to her fucking funeral! 1589 01:18:07,892 --> 01:18:09,185 Who are you? 1590 01:18:10,562 --> 01:18:12,355 If your car would've blown up in Brooklyn, 1591 01:18:12,480 --> 01:18:16,693 would anyone, anyone, come to help you? 1592 01:18:17,235 --> 01:18:19,696 First of all, I wouldn't have needed a car in Brooklyn. 1593 01:18:19,821 --> 01:18:23,199 Second, if! Had one, I doubt it would've been blown up 1594 01:18:23,283 --> 01:18:24,909 by god knows who. 1595 01:18:25,785 --> 01:18:27,036 I don't understand you people. 1596 01:18:27,161 --> 01:18:28,997 "You people" is a micro aggression. 1597 01:18:29,122 --> 01:18:30,832 My apologies. Y'all. 1598 01:18:30,957 --> 01:18:33,167 "Y'all" is a cultural appropriation. 1599 01:18:33,293 --> 01:18:35,420 Paris... 1600 01:18:35,545 --> 01:18:38,673 You accusing someone of cultural appropriation 1601 01:18:38,798 --> 01:18:40,633 is cultural appropriation. 1602 01:18:41,342 --> 01:18:43,511 Why wouldn't you look after her? 1603 01:18:43,887 --> 01:18:45,263 Check in on her? 1604 01:18:45,930 --> 01:18:48,057 You wouldn't do anything for her, would you? 1605 01:18:48,141 --> 01:18:50,226 That's right. I wouldn't. 1606 01:18:50,351 --> 01:18:52,770 I was hooking up with different people, 1607 01:18:52,896 --> 01:18:55,356 and I assumed she was, too, 1608 01:18:55,440 --> 01:18:58,401 because I live in the real world, 1609 01:18:58,526 --> 01:19:01,237 and that's what everybody does. 1610 01:19:01,738 --> 01:19:03,865 I tried to tell you this when you called. 1611 01:19:04,407 --> 01:19:06,159 She wasn't my girlfriend. 1612 01:19:06,242 --> 01:19:08,828 She was just a girl in my phone. 1613 01:19:17,170 --> 01:19:18,713 Now you've been in a fight. 1614 01:19:32,310 --> 01:19:33,978 I don't know the whole story... 1615 01:19:35,730 --> 01:19:37,482 But life is complicated. 1616 01:19:37,607 --> 01:19:40,193 Even around here, if you can believe that. 1617 01:19:41,736 --> 01:19:43,529 I'll tell you what I think. 1618 01:19:45,198 --> 01:19:47,492 I think people don't do drugs for no reason. 1619 01:19:48,451 --> 01:19:50,453 They do drugs because they're in pain. 1620 01:19:50,536 --> 01:19:51,746 Pain like... 1621 01:19:52,580 --> 01:19:55,166 Like maybe caring for someone who hardly knows your name. 1622 01:19:57,168 --> 01:19:58,544 So, I don't know, Ben. 1623 01:19:59,963 --> 01:20:03,174 But if you're still looking for someone to blame for what happened, 1624 01:20:04,092 --> 01:20:06,344 you may not have needed to come all this way. 1625 01:20:11,683 --> 01:20:13,226 Bless your heart. 1626 01:21:16,998 --> 01:21:20,334 You were right, Eloise. I was the story. 1627 01:21:21,919 --> 01:21:24,005 A self-absorbed know-it-all 1628 01:21:24,130 --> 01:21:28,134 thinks he's gonna figure out the meaning ofamerica, 1629 01:21:29,010 --> 01:21:31,387 and all he learns is how empty he is. 1630 01:21:34,265 --> 01:21:36,100 I was the one living a myth. 1631 01:21:39,437 --> 01:21:42,148 They say you regret the things you don't do. 1632 01:21:44,233 --> 01:21:45,568 I didn't love. 1633 01:21:49,781 --> 01:21:51,032 I have no story. 1634 01:21:52,116 --> 01:21:53,493 I guess that's the story. 1635 01:21:54,744 --> 01:21:57,330 I am the story, and the story sucks. 1636 01:21:58,623 --> 01:21:59,999 The story is nothing. 1637 01:22:02,001 --> 01:22:03,419 I'm coming home. 1638 01:22:09,092 --> 01:22:10,301 I'm scared. 1639 01:22:11,010 --> 01:22:12,345 What are you scared of? 1640 01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:14,597 Ghosts. 1641 01:22:15,139 --> 01:22:16,349 Ghosts aren't real. 1642 01:22:17,058 --> 01:22:20,144 If they're not real, how come everyone knows what they are? 1643 01:22:20,770 --> 01:22:23,940 They're real as an idea, but they're not "real" real. 1644 01:22:24,816 --> 01:22:28,111 That's what's scary about ghosts, that they aren't real. 1645 01:22:28,861 --> 01:22:31,572 If ghosts were real, they wouldn't be scary at all, right? 1646 01:22:31,656 --> 01:22:34,867 We would just smile and say, "hi, ghosts." 1647 01:22:34,992 --> 01:22:36,202 Hi, ghosts. 1648 01:22:37,870 --> 01:22:39,288 Hi, ghost. 1649 01:22:40,748 --> 01:22:42,625 Wouldn't that be cool? 1650 01:22:42,750 --> 01:22:47,421 If when someone wasn't there anymore, there was still a little piece of them 1651 01:22:47,505 --> 01:22:49,841 that could surprise you sometimes? 1652 01:22:50,424 --> 01:22:51,634 Yeah. 1653 01:22:52,343 --> 01:22:54,345 But there's not, there's nothing. 1654 01:22:55,346 --> 01:22:57,431 And that's what's scary about ghosts. 1655 01:22:57,515 --> 01:23:02,103 That the little piece of someone 1656 01:23:02,186 --> 01:23:04,856 that feels like it might still be there 1657 01:23:04,939 --> 01:23:06,816 isn't there at all. 1658 01:23:11,279 --> 01:23:12,697 Do you feel better? 1659 01:23:15,491 --> 01:23:16,826 Me neither. 1660 01:23:21,289 --> 01:23:22,623 Thanks for listening. 1661 01:23:25,793 --> 01:23:27,503 I'm leaving tomorrow, Mason. 1662 01:23:29,380 --> 01:23:30,631 I love you mucho. 1663 01:23:31,090 --> 01:23:33,759 One-four-three-five. What? 1664 01:23:33,843 --> 01:23:35,261 One-four-three-five. 1665 01:23:35,344 --> 01:23:37,638 It's what Abby used to say to me. 1666 01:23:38,097 --> 01:23:40,683 She used to say, "I love you mucho," 1667 01:23:40,808 --> 01:23:42,059 but then she shortened it. 1668 01:23:42,185 --> 01:23:44,103 So it was kind of like a secret code 1669 01:23:44,228 --> 01:23:47,315 'cause that's the number of letters in "I love you mucho." 1670 01:23:48,608 --> 01:23:50,234 One-four-three-five. 1671 01:25:19,031 --> 01:25:20,408 Hello? 1672 01:25:21,659 --> 01:25:23,077 This is beautiful. 1673 01:25:23,160 --> 01:25:24,287 What/s? 1674 01:25:25,621 --> 01:25:28,374 What you just recorded. Your concluding piece. 1675 01:25:29,375 --> 01:25:31,794 It's what we talked about from the beginning. 1676 01:25:31,877 --> 01:25:33,713 It's disconnection, myth... 1677 01:25:35,339 --> 01:25:37,967 Stories are always personal, but... 1678 01:25:39,635 --> 01:25:41,137 This is you. 1679 01:25:42,930 --> 01:25:44,557 You know, it's so you. 1680 01:25:44,682 --> 01:25:47,893 It's kind of... everyone. 1681 01:25:47,977 --> 01:25:49,603 You didn't lock that yet, did you? 1682 01:25:49,729 --> 01:25:51,147 No, not till the morning. 1683 01:25:51,272 --> 01:25:52,958 It's on the server if you want to check it out. 1684 01:25:52,982 --> 01:25:55,109 Great, great. Just don't touch it tonight. 1685 01:25:55,192 --> 01:25:57,445 There's... it's not 100%. 1686 01:25:57,570 --> 01:25:59,739 There's a tiny piece I'm gonna add. 1687 01:25:59,864 --> 01:26:02,325 No, don't touch it. It's great. 1688 01:26:02,450 --> 01:26:04,285 You're only gonna fuck it up. Don't. 1689 01:26:06,120 --> 01:26:07,663 Where are you right now? 1690 01:26:07,788 --> 01:26:09,457 Uh, I'm in an uber. 1691 01:26:11,292 --> 01:26:13,586 Well, anyway, good job. 1692 01:26:14,045 --> 01:26:16,047 People are gonna love this. 1693 01:26:16,881 --> 01:26:18,924 I didn't know you had it in you. 1694 01:26:19,383 --> 01:26:21,010 Or maybe I did. 1695 01:26:21,469 --> 01:26:23,137 Heart sees heart, right? 1696 01:26:23,596 --> 01:26:24,638 Okay, all right. 1697 01:26:24,722 --> 01:26:27,016 All right, just wait till the morning, okay? Okay, bye. 1698 01:26:38,569 --> 01:26:40,821 I won't be your chosen one 1699 01:26:40,946 --> 01:26:43,074 I 'ii just be your fire 1700 01:26:43,199 --> 01:26:45,117 I won't be your favored son 1701 01:26:45,242 --> 01:26:47,328 I 'ii just be what you desire 1702 01:26:47,453 --> 01:26:49,497 I won't be your Superman 1703 01:26:49,622 --> 01:26:51,707 but I'll be your fear 1704 01:26:51,832 --> 01:26:53,876 I won't be your promised land 1705 01:26:54,001 --> 01:26:55,878 I'll just be the voice you hear 1706 01:26:56,003 --> 01:26:59,465 shot, better run and hide 1707 01:26:59,590 --> 01:27:04,136 shot, got an evil eye... 1708 01:27:05,513 --> 01:27:07,681 Don't go anywhere. Yes, sir. 1709 01:27:07,807 --> 01:27:12,937 'Cause, shot, got an evil eye, yeah 1710 01:27:22,780 --> 01:27:24,323 Look at him! 1711 01:27:30,746 --> 01:27:33,374 Fuck yeah. Texas tech fireworks, bitch. 1712 01:27:33,499 --> 01:27:35,126 Red and black, baby. 1713 01:27:35,251 --> 01:27:36,460 Are you shitting me? 1714 01:27:36,544 --> 01:27:39,547 I told you black fireworks ain't gonna show, you jackass. 1715 01:27:39,630 --> 01:27:41,090 I can see 'em. 1716 01:27:41,173 --> 01:27:44,093 Hey. It's the longhorns fan. 1717 01:27:44,760 --> 01:27:46,429 How's your car, man? 1718 01:27:46,512 --> 01:27:47,972 You like what we did to it? 1719 01:27:48,055 --> 01:27:49,765 That was about football? 1720 01:27:49,890 --> 01:27:51,058 Jesus Christ. 1721 01:27:56,564 --> 01:27:58,274 What the fuck are you doing here? 1722 01:27:58,399 --> 01:27:59,608 Igotaninvfle. 1723 01:27:59,692 --> 01:28:01,402 You're wearing my shit. Yeah. 1724 01:28:01,527 --> 01:28:02,820 What the fuck? 1725 01:28:02,945 --> 01:28:04,655 Okay, well, it's his hat, so... 1726 01:28:07,324 --> 01:28:09,410 You better be careful. That's a loaded gun. 1727 01:28:09,493 --> 01:28:10,786 You keep your gun loaded? 1728 01:28:10,911 --> 01:28:12,580 You keep your phone charged? 1729 01:28:12,705 --> 01:28:14,665 How'd you even get here? Mason drove me. 1730 01:28:15,541 --> 01:28:18,377 Who in the fuck is Mason? Mason's your fucking brother. 1731 01:28:18,461 --> 01:28:20,045 I'd watch your back. 1732 01:28:20,171 --> 01:28:21,589 You don't have friends here. 1733 01:28:21,714 --> 01:28:23,174 Look who it is. 1734 01:28:24,925 --> 01:28:26,260 Look who it is. 1735 01:28:26,385 --> 01:28:28,179 - My friend. - Look at you, bud. 1736 01:28:29,013 --> 01:28:31,932 How you doing? How's that podcast coming? 1737 01:28:32,057 --> 01:28:33,809 I sent it in last night. 1738 01:28:35,811 --> 01:28:38,022 You're still here? Still here. 1739 01:28:41,650 --> 01:28:43,486 Texas has a pull, doesn't it? 1740 01:28:45,154 --> 01:28:46,614 Kinda gets under your skin. 1741 01:28:47,615 --> 01:28:48,699 Hundred percent. 1742 01:28:49,325 --> 01:28:51,285 Why don't you turn that thing on? 1743 01:28:51,410 --> 01:28:53,037 Got a story for you. 1744 01:28:53,829 --> 01:28:54,997 Fellas. 1745 01:28:59,877 --> 01:29:04,548 First drug law in the united states passed in 1875. 1746 01:29:05,674 --> 01:29:08,928 The Chinese rail workers brought in the opium den. 1747 01:29:09,011 --> 01:29:12,556 And this country was so anti-immigrant 1748 01:29:12,973 --> 01:29:15,184 that they banned the opium den. 1749 01:29:16,727 --> 01:29:18,270 Not the opium. 1750 01:29:18,395 --> 01:29:19,772 Right? 1751 01:29:19,897 --> 01:29:22,233 You ever hear anything more American than that? 1752 01:29:22,316 --> 01:29:25,986 I mean, now we got an opium epidemic breaking out across the heartland 1753 01:29:26,070 --> 01:29:28,447 with all the ceremony, majesty, 1754 01:29:28,531 --> 01:29:30,282 glamour and fun is removed. 1755 01:29:30,407 --> 01:29:32,576 And that's what people yearn for. 1756 01:29:33,285 --> 01:29:34,828 You see what I'm saying? 1757 01:29:36,121 --> 01:29:39,083 Do you think Gary webb would've won a pulitzer today? 1758 01:29:41,085 --> 01:29:43,963 You know, I think you were smart for staying here. 1759 01:29:44,046 --> 01:29:45,881 Yeah? Yeah. 1760 01:29:46,006 --> 01:29:48,968 That story about abilene, it's nice. 1761 01:29:51,387 --> 01:29:54,515 I think you were meant to tell a bigger story. 1762 01:29:54,640 --> 01:29:58,310 Ask yourself, what part of the country today 1763 01:29:58,394 --> 01:30:00,396 is it in certain people's interest 1764 01:30:00,521 --> 01:30:04,900 to keep devastated, demoralized, dependent, and divided? 1765 01:30:06,026 --> 01:30:07,903 You got the opioid crisis, 1766 01:30:07,987 --> 01:30:10,406 nation in divide, civic unrest. 1767 01:30:10,489 --> 01:30:13,534 Why are all these things happening at the same time? 1768 01:30:13,659 --> 01:30:15,869 What do you really think is going on here? 1769 01:30:19,915 --> 01:30:21,792 Told you I had a story for you. 1770 01:30:31,844 --> 01:30:34,847 80 what are you saying? That it all connects? 1771 01:30:34,930 --> 01:30:38,017 That the conspiracy theories are true? 1772 01:30:38,100 --> 01:30:39,602 What I'm saying is 1773 01:30:39,727 --> 01:30:42,479 people can sense the truth, 1774 01:30:43,606 --> 01:30:45,691 but they're grasping for the facts. 1775 01:30:46,317 --> 01:30:49,737 See, a myth is just a truth without facts. 1776 01:30:49,862 --> 01:30:52,656 That's why it comes out all abstract, gnarled, 1777 01:30:52,740 --> 01:30:53,741 wrong. 1778 01:30:54,950 --> 01:30:58,329 Easy to dismiss and ridicule. Nobody listens to them 1779 01:30:58,454 --> 01:31:00,289 because they don't have the facts. 1780 01:31:02,458 --> 01:31:03,542 But I do. 1781 01:31:04,209 --> 01:31:06,545 Yeah. And you, ben_ 1782 01:31:08,797 --> 01:31:10,924 The whole damn world will listen to you. 1783 01:31:18,599 --> 01:31:20,017 Where are they going? 1784 01:31:20,142 --> 01:31:21,268 After party. 1785 01:31:23,937 --> 01:31:26,357 The after-party. Tell me about that. 1786 01:31:26,982 --> 01:31:30,361 I mean, people overdose a hundred times a day, Ben. 1787 01:31:30,444 --> 01:31:31,695 That's a fact. 1788 01:31:31,779 --> 01:31:33,590 But they can't do it in a place where it's gonna be 1789 01:31:33,614 --> 01:31:35,014 a problem for people like you and I. 1790 01:31:37,409 --> 01:31:39,203 That's what happened to abilene. 1791 01:31:40,746 --> 01:31:41,955 Abilene? 1792 01:31:42,998 --> 01:31:45,334 I mean, she died at a party like this. 1793 01:31:48,212 --> 01:31:49,880 I thought you finished that story. 1794 01:31:49,963 --> 01:31:51,632 Oh. 1795 01:31:52,341 --> 01:31:53,884 This is just for us. 1796 01:31:54,885 --> 01:31:57,137 Well, it's not a very good story anyway. 1797 01:31:57,221 --> 01:31:59,765 She was a drug addict. She od'd. 1798 01:32:00,849 --> 01:32:02,685 Then she tried to call 911. 1799 01:32:04,061 --> 01:32:06,980 No. In Texas, we don't call 911. 1800 01:32:07,106 --> 01:32:08,899 Yeah, I've heard that. 1801 01:32:10,025 --> 01:32:12,194 They record all those calls. 1802 01:32:12,319 --> 01:32:15,239 We gotta be very careful about what gets recorded. 1803 01:32:15,364 --> 01:32:17,074 Yeah. You do. 1804 01:32:17,825 --> 01:32:19,702 It's all that's left of us. 1805 01:32:20,202 --> 01:32:21,537 The recordings. 1806 01:32:22,746 --> 01:32:25,749 And people like you and I, abilene, 1807 01:32:25,874 --> 01:32:29,420 everybody posting photos of every part of their day, 1808 01:32:30,754 --> 01:32:33,549 we trade in our entire lives 1809 01:32:34,800 --> 01:32:38,011 for the tiny pieces that get recorded of us. 1810 01:32:40,597 --> 01:32:41,974 Abilene tried to call 911. 1811 01:32:42,099 --> 01:32:44,184 You didn't let her. Then what? 1812 01:32:47,187 --> 01:32:48,397 Oh, boy. 1813 01:32:48,480 --> 01:32:50,065 Don't get distracted. 1814 01:32:50,691 --> 01:32:53,610 You gotta admit, that's a hell of a distraction. 1815 01:32:53,694 --> 01:32:56,864 That is... that's kind of like the very definition of distraction. 1816 01:32:56,989 --> 01:32:59,491 - Abilene. - Abilene. 1817 01:32:59,616 --> 01:33:02,327 Abilene. Abilene. 1818 01:33:02,453 --> 01:33:04,163 What happened to abilene? 1819 01:33:05,164 --> 01:33:07,124 Do you believe in ghosts, Ben? 1820 01:33:07,875 --> 01:33:09,960 I got a call from a ghost earlier. 1821 01:33:12,171 --> 01:33:14,298 Kind of thought I'd be seeing you today. 1822 01:33:16,800 --> 01:33:18,594 What happened to her? 1823 01:33:18,719 --> 01:33:20,387 Why do you care so much? 1824 01:33:22,598 --> 01:33:24,600 Why do you care so little? 1825 01:33:28,729 --> 01:33:30,439 She overdosed. 1826 01:33:30,564 --> 01:33:34,109 Instead of helping her, you dragged her to the after-party, 1827 01:33:34,193 --> 01:33:36,153 which is a spot with no cell reception 1828 01:33:36,236 --> 01:33:40,073 at the exact intersection of four overlapping lawjurisdictions 1829 01:33:40,199 --> 01:33:44,286 where you knew her death would just become an anonymous statistic. 1830 01:33:46,246 --> 01:33:47,748 Hmm. 1831 01:33:52,544 --> 01:33:54,171 It's well said. 1832 01:33:54,296 --> 01:33:55,422 Very succinct. 1833 01:33:59,384 --> 01:34:01,386 Yes. That's exactly what happened. 1834 01:34:10,646 --> 01:34:11,772 Brilliant. 1835 01:34:12,689 --> 01:34:15,317 You got it. You got it all. 1836 01:34:16,276 --> 01:34:19,112 That's a story about america. 1837 01:34:19,905 --> 01:34:22,032 Let me know if you need me to rerecord anything. 1838 01:34:22,157 --> 01:34:25,077 Or, like, rephrase things. I can do that, too. 1839 01:34:27,037 --> 01:34:28,038 What? 1840 01:34:28,872 --> 01:34:31,083 Oh, come... you and I are gonna be sitting on a panel 1841 01:34:31,208 --> 01:34:32,876 talking about this. I want it to be great. 1842 01:34:32,960 --> 01:34:35,128 We both know how this works. Right? 1843 01:34:35,254 --> 01:34:37,464 Yeah, I mean, at first, 1844 01:34:37,548 --> 01:34:41,051 everyone's gonna think you got your bad guy. 1845 01:34:43,387 --> 01:34:45,597 Nobody's gonna let it be that simple. 1846 01:34:45,722 --> 01:34:47,432 Everyone's gonna have to have their take 1847 01:34:47,516 --> 01:34:49,059 'cause that's how it works now. 1848 01:34:50,310 --> 01:34:51,687 Everyone has a take. 1849 01:34:52,354 --> 01:34:54,165 See, if you don't have a take, you don't have a voice. 1850 01:34:54,189 --> 01:34:56,024 If you don't have a voice, you don't exist. 1851 01:34:56,650 --> 01:35:00,279 So yeah, at first, everyone's gonna blame me. 1852 01:35:01,363 --> 01:35:04,241 But then someone's gonna say, "wait a second." 1853 01:35:05,492 --> 01:35:06,994 There's a big difference 1854 01:35:07,077 --> 01:35:09,830 between leaving somebody to die 1855 01:35:09,955 --> 01:35:11,582 and killing somebody. 1856 01:35:14,001 --> 01:35:15,586 Then they're gonna turn to you. 1857 01:35:17,045 --> 01:35:19,423 What were you doing here in the first place? 1858 01:35:20,090 --> 01:35:22,175 What was your relationship with her? 1859 01:35:22,301 --> 01:35:25,762 Why would you exploit her grieving family? 1860 01:35:28,015 --> 01:35:29,808 Those... those characters. 1861 01:35:31,351 --> 01:35:33,520 I mean, that's what they're gonna be. 1862 01:35:34,021 --> 01:35:35,397 Famous characters. 1863 01:35:36,273 --> 01:35:37,524 Not famous people. 1864 01:35:37,608 --> 01:35:39,484 And then they're gonna blame the family. 1865 01:35:40,360 --> 01:35:42,112 I hope they're ready for that. 1866 01:35:44,323 --> 01:35:45,741 They'll blame the president. 1867 01:35:45,866 --> 01:35:47,367 The last president. 1868 01:35:49,286 --> 01:35:51,306 And then they'll start in with the conspiracy theories. 1869 01:35:51,330 --> 01:35:54,333 You know, and someone will refute the conspiracy theories, 1870 01:35:54,416 --> 01:35:58,629 and then one side will make their version like their cause. 1871 01:35:59,796 --> 01:36:02,466 And the other side will take the other side 1872 01:36:02,549 --> 01:36:06,136 just to take the other side and on, and on. 1873 01:36:06,511 --> 01:36:09,222 Until your story proves 1874 01:36:09,890 --> 01:36:13,226 the defining truth of our time. 1875 01:36:14,895 --> 01:36:16,188 Which is what? 1876 01:36:17,356 --> 01:36:20,943 Everything means everything. 1877 01:36:22,277 --> 01:36:25,739 So nothing means anything. 1878 01:36:30,619 --> 01:36:32,496 Some things mean something. 1879 01:36:34,748 --> 01:36:35,999 Yeah? 1880 01:36:36,708 --> 01:36:37,876 Like what? 1881 01:36:38,293 --> 01:36:39,461 Abilene? 1882 01:36:40,879 --> 01:36:43,090 You didn't care about her. 1883 01:36:43,173 --> 01:36:45,342 You came here for yourself. 1884 01:36:46,218 --> 01:36:47,719 For a recording. 1885 01:36:48,971 --> 01:36:50,555 And then you heard her music. 1886 01:36:51,348 --> 01:36:54,768 And you saw her photos. The record of her. 1887 01:36:55,936 --> 01:36:57,813 And that's what you care for. 1888 01:36:59,272 --> 01:37:00,691 A recording. 1889 01:37:02,275 --> 01:37:03,568 Not a person. 1890 01:37:08,031 --> 01:37:09,449 We are all... 1891 01:37:10,909 --> 01:37:12,619 Just inspirations 1892 01:37:14,037 --> 01:37:16,248 for the record of ourselves. 1893 01:37:16,623 --> 01:37:19,710 You and I both know it. You got your opus. 1894 01:37:20,252 --> 01:37:22,295 And that's what matters. 1895 01:37:23,380 --> 01:37:25,590 But abilene? The person? 1896 01:37:28,135 --> 01:37:29,344 Come on. 1897 01:37:30,387 --> 01:37:32,097 She was just some girl. 1898 01:37:32,931 --> 01:37:34,641 That's the truth, Ben. 1899 01:37:35,267 --> 01:37:36,643 Hundred percent. 1900 01:37:45,402 --> 01:37:47,738 I can almost taste it now 1901 01:37:51,033 --> 01:37:52,743 I don't even have to fake it now 1902 01:37:52,868 --> 01:37:55,370 you were like so sick 1903 01:37:55,495 --> 01:37:56,997 everybody said it 1904 01:37:57,122 --> 01:38:00,292 you were way ahead of the trend, ge-get it 1905 01:38:00,417 --> 01:38:03,628 Elvis is the best, hell yes 1906 01:38:03,754 --> 01:38:07,299 honey, put on that party dress 1907 01:38:07,424 --> 01:38:10,677 like ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh 1908 01:38:10,802 --> 01:38:12,763 ooh, ooh, oh, oh, ah 1909 01:38:12,888 --> 01:38:15,015 you make me crazy 1910 01:38:15,140 --> 01:38:19,227 you make me wild 1911 01:38:19,352 --> 01:38:25,233 just like a baby, spin me round like a child 1912 01:38:25,358 --> 01:38:27,319 your skin so 1913 01:38:27,444 --> 01:38:31,907 golden brown 1914 01:38:32,032 --> 01:38:33,992 be young 1915 01:38:34,117 --> 01:38:37,662 be dope, be proud 1916 01:38:37,788 --> 01:38:40,373 like an American 1917 01:38:40,499 --> 01:38:44,336 ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh 1918 01:38:44,461 --> 01:38:46,338 like an American 1919 01:38:46,463 --> 01:38:50,383 ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh 1920 01:38:54,971 --> 01:38:57,682 everybody wants to go fast 1921 01:38:57,808 --> 01:39:00,769 but they can't compare 1922 01:39:00,894 --> 01:39:04,356 I don't really want the rest 1923 01:39:04,481 --> 01:39:07,484 only you can take me there 1924 01:39:07,609 --> 01:39:10,070 I don't even know what I'm saying 1925 01:39:10,195 --> 01:39:16,868 but I'm praying for you... 1926 01:39:19,955 --> 01:39:23,125 We got a report of a possible overdose. 49-40 1927 01:39:23,208 --> 01:39:25,085 after-party. Ambulance en route. 1928 01:39:25,168 --> 01:39:27,712 A 911 on a Saturday night? 1929 01:39:28,255 --> 01:39:29,464 Bullshit. 1930 01:39:29,589 --> 01:39:30,924 People. 1931 01:39:31,007 --> 01:39:33,487 Got a report. Quentin sellers shot in the head. 1932 01:39:34,594 --> 01:39:36,680 I never thought of that guy as accident-prone. 1933 01:39:36,805 --> 01:39:39,724 Let's get wild tonight, check your heart at the door 1934 01:39:40,767 --> 01:39:43,478 that ain't what tonight is for 1935 01:39:43,603 --> 01:39:45,564 it's an old times, good times... 1936 01:39:47,399 --> 01:39:52,445 Gonna send you this text when I get signal 1937 01:39:53,864 --> 01:39:58,702 I'll know just the words to say when I do... 1938 01:40:11,381 --> 01:40:13,216 I heard that y'all made up. 1939 01:40:14,759 --> 01:40:15,760 Yeah. 1940 01:40:17,762 --> 01:40:20,307 And I understand that was quite a party last night. 1941 01:40:23,476 --> 01:40:24,853 I wasn't there. 1942 01:40:25,937 --> 01:40:28,190 That's right, you weren't. 1943 01:40:28,273 --> 01:40:29,524 But... 1944 01:40:30,025 --> 01:40:32,360 I heard it was a pretty good party. 1945 01:40:36,823 --> 01:40:40,744 I've... very much enjoyed being in your home. 1946 01:40:44,998 --> 01:40:46,833 You're gonna need a ride. 1947 01:40:47,375 --> 01:40:49,753 That's true. My car is... 1948 01:40:52,839 --> 01:40:55,050 What are your plans when you get back? 1949 01:40:55,300 --> 01:40:57,385 Guess I have to find a new story. 1950 01:40:57,552 --> 01:40:59,054 After all that? 1951 01:41:00,180 --> 01:41:02,390 What about all that stuff with Abby? 1952 01:41:03,183 --> 01:41:05,560 I think that story's just for us. 1953 01:41:10,315 --> 01:41:11,775 That's nice, too. 1954 01:41:12,692 --> 01:41:14,027 No regrets. 1955 01:41:14,778 --> 01:41:16,363 I never understood that. 1956 01:41:16,446 --> 01:41:17,697 No regrets. 1957 01:41:18,156 --> 01:41:19,658 I mean, how do you... 1958 01:41:22,494 --> 01:41:27,249 In my life, everything starts with a regret, ends with a regret. 1959 01:41:27,332 --> 01:41:28,917 In between, regrets. 1960 01:41:29,709 --> 01:41:31,294 It's all regrets. 1961 01:41:32,629 --> 01:41:35,006 You run as fast as you can from the last regret 1962 01:41:35,090 --> 01:41:37,570 and, of course, you're just running straight into the next one. 1963 01:41:38,051 --> 01:41:39,427 That's life. 1964 01:41:40,303 --> 01:41:41,680 It's all regrets. 1965 01:41:41,763 --> 01:41:43,139 That's what they should say. 1966 01:41:44,224 --> 01:41:45,642 No other way to be alive. 1967 01:41:47,269 --> 01:41:48,770 It's all regrets. 1968 01:41:50,355 --> 01:41:52,023 Make 'em count. 143122

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