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1
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Be strong.
2
00:00:13,381 --> 00:00:14,781
Be nice to your friends.
3
00:00:16,981 --> 00:00:19,301
You always love itwhen you do a nice thing, don't you?
4
00:00:19,381 --> 00:00:21,741
[Lisa] I mean... you know, admittedly,
5
00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:24,301
it's usually to apologizefor having said something awful, but...
6
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Well, not awful, but too honest.
7
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Not always the best policy.
8
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[dog whining]
9
00:00:32,341 --> 00:00:33,581
You want your breakfast?
10
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-Yeah?
-[Brandy whining]
11
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Come on, then.
12
00:00:38,501 --> 00:00:41,021
["Top of the World"
by the Carpenters plays]
13
00:00:55,061 --> 00:00:59,261
♪ Such a feeling's coming over me ♪
14
00:00:59,821 --> 00:01:04,621
♪ There is wonderIn most everything I see ♪
15
00:01:05,101 --> 00:01:07,861
♪ Not a cloud in the sky ♪
16
00:01:07,941 --> 00:01:10,301
♪ Got the sun in my eyes ♪
17
00:01:10,381 --> 00:01:15,261
♪ And I won't be surprisedIf it's a dream ♪
18
00:01:15,821 --> 00:01:20,261
♪ Everything I want the world to be ♪
19
00:01:20,541 --> 00:01:25,581
♪ Is now coming trueEspecially for me ♪
20
00:01:25,941 --> 00:01:28,581
♪ And the reason is clear ♪
21
00:01:28,661 --> 00:01:31,261
♪ It's because you are here ♪
22
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:35,941
♪ You're the nearest thing to heavenThat I've seen ♪
23
00:01:36,021 --> 00:01:41,461
♪ I'm on the top of the worldLookin' down on creation ♪
24
00:01:41,541 --> 00:01:46,221
♪ And the only explanationI can find ♪
25
00:01:46,621 --> 00:01:51,541
♪ Is the love that I've foundEver since you've been around ♪
26
00:01:51,781 --> 00:01:56,661
♪ Your love's put meAt the top of the world ♪
27
00:02:02,781 --> 00:02:07,221
♪ Something in the windHas learned my name ♪
28
00:02:07,501 --> 00:02:12,341
♪ And it's telling meThat things are not the same ♪
29
00:02:12,701 --> 00:02:17,981
♪ In the leaves on the treesAnd the touch of the breeze ♪
30
00:02:18,061 --> 00:02:22,821
♪ There's a pleasin' sense of happinessFor me ♪
31
00:02:23,781 --> 00:02:27,981
♪ There is only one wishOn my mind ♪
32
00:02:28,341 --> 00:02:33,101
♪ When this day is throughI hope that I will find ♪
33
00:02:33,461 --> 00:02:38,741
♪ That tomorrow will beJust the same for you and me ♪
34
00:02:38,821 --> 00:02:43,541
♪ All I need will be mineIf you are here ♪
35
00:02:43,621 --> 00:02:49,021
♪ I'm on the top of the worldLookin' down on creation ♪
36
00:02:49,101 --> 00:02:53,741
♪And the only explanationI can find ♪
37
00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:59,101
♪ Is the love that I've foundEver since you've been around ♪
38
00:02:59,421 --> 00:03:03,901
♪ Your love's put meAt the top of the world ♪
39
00:03:04,221 --> 00:03:09,661
♪ I'm on the top of the worldLooking down on creation ♪
40
00:03:09,741 --> 00:03:14,381
♪ And the only explanationI can find ♪
41
00:03:14,821 --> 00:03:19,661
♪ Is the love that I've foundEver since you've been around ♪
42
00:03:19,941 --> 00:03:24,741
♪ Your love's put meAt the top of the world ♪
43
00:03:32,421 --> 00:03:33,781
[doorbell ringing]
44
00:03:35,141 --> 00:03:36,301
-All right?
-[Tony] Yeah.
45
00:03:41,541 --> 00:03:42,661
[Tony sighs]
46
00:03:45,981 --> 00:03:47,181
That's from last night.
47
00:03:47,581 --> 00:03:49,701
And that's the last one in the house,
so...
48
00:03:50,141 --> 00:03:52,341
Got to sort myself out. Get better.
49
00:03:53,021 --> 00:03:54,141
What we doing today?
50
00:03:54,221 --> 00:03:56,421
-"Tambury's Oldest Woman."
-Right. How old is she?
51
00:03:56,501 --> 00:03:58,701
Hundred.
She's got a telegram from the Queen.
52
00:03:59,861 --> 00:04:01,381
-Are you all right?
-Huh? Yeah.
53
00:04:02,861 --> 00:04:05,981
[sighs] Just... feeling a bit low.
54
00:04:06,061 --> 00:04:09,301
-Come on, mate. You were doing so well.
-[Tony] Just feeling sorry for myself.
55
00:04:09,381 --> 00:04:10,781
And guilty about that.
56
00:04:10,861 --> 00:04:13,661
I meet people every day
with worse lives than me,
57
00:04:14,261 --> 00:04:15,501
and they get on with it.
58
00:04:16,941 --> 00:04:18,501
I'm gonna try and be more zen.
59
00:04:19,901 --> 00:04:21,861
I'm not going to let cunts wind me up.
60
00:04:22,381 --> 00:04:23,541
Is that a Buddha quote?
61
00:04:25,021 --> 00:04:25,901
Exactly.
62
00:04:27,661 --> 00:04:29,181
How's it going with the nurse?
63
00:04:29,261 --> 00:04:30,261
Oh, um...
64
00:04:30,861 --> 00:04:32,221
We're just friends, so...
65
00:04:32,661 --> 00:04:34,101
-Oh.
-[Tony] No, it's fine.
66
00:04:34,821 --> 00:04:36,381
She said I wasn't over Lisa.
67
00:04:37,301 --> 00:04:38,341
She's right.
68
00:04:38,421 --> 00:04:41,221
Well, don't miss the boat.
She won't wait forever.
69
00:04:42,861 --> 00:04:43,981
I still miss Lisa.
70
00:04:45,861 --> 00:04:46,941
All the time.
71
00:04:47,341 --> 00:04:50,741
But she wouldn't want me to,
not like this. Not in this much pain.
72
00:04:51,221 --> 00:04:52,061
I'm...
73
00:04:53,221 --> 00:04:54,901
getting a bit better every day.
74
00:04:58,221 --> 00:04:59,221
Come on.
75
00:05:02,981 --> 00:05:04,941
[Tony] How did you feelwhen you got the telegram?
76
00:05:05,981 --> 00:05:06,901
What?
77
00:05:06,981 --> 00:05:09,901
[raises voice] How did you feel
when you got the telegram from the Queen?
78
00:05:10,301 --> 00:05:12,341
Same as I feel every other day.
79
00:05:12,741 --> 00:05:16,181
Dreadful. In pain.
Wishing I hadn't lived through the night.
80
00:05:17,021 --> 00:05:18,061
The Queen, though?
81
00:05:18,821 --> 00:05:20,261
Some butler sent this.
82
00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:24,701
What advice would you give to someone
to have a long life like yours?
83
00:05:25,061 --> 00:05:26,061
Don't.
84
00:05:26,501 --> 00:05:27,941
It's fucking awful.
85
00:05:28,381 --> 00:05:30,021
It hurts just to be alive.
86
00:05:30,901 --> 00:05:32,581
Here's my typical month:
87
00:05:33,341 --> 00:05:35,141
first week, diarrhea.
88
00:05:35,661 --> 00:05:37,341
The next three weeks?
89
00:05:37,741 --> 00:05:39,141
I can't shit at all!
90
00:05:40,461 --> 00:05:43,101
You must've seen a lot, though?
A hundred years.
91
00:05:43,181 --> 00:05:47,781
I was born in Tambury.
I'll die in Tambury - very soon, I hope.
92
00:05:47,861 --> 00:05:49,501
I've seen fuck-all!
93
00:05:49,901 --> 00:05:51,501
I may as well have been a tree.
94
00:05:52,861 --> 00:05:54,621
What do your family think of this?
95
00:05:55,461 --> 00:05:57,701
I haven't got a family, they all died.
96
00:05:58,301 --> 00:06:00,861
Right... Your friends here, though?
97
00:06:00,941 --> 00:06:03,021
[exasperated sigh] They're not friends.
98
00:06:03,581 --> 00:06:04,901
They're cunts.
99
00:06:05,341 --> 00:06:06,341
All of them.
100
00:06:06,421 --> 00:06:09,181
I hate every single one of them.
101
00:06:09,261 --> 00:06:12,341
-[distant coughing]
-And when I outlive one of them,
102
00:06:12,661 --> 00:06:15,421
they bring a new cunt in
to take their place.
103
00:06:16,541 --> 00:06:17,461
Cunts!
104
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:23,061
-Good. Take a picture.
-[Lenny] Yeah!
105
00:06:26,181 --> 00:06:27,221
Er, smile.
106
00:06:28,541 --> 00:06:29,901
-Bollocks.
-[camera clicks]
107
00:06:30,301 --> 00:06:31,301
[Lenny] Great.
108
00:06:34,901 --> 00:06:36,941
-[shaver whirs]
-[knocking on door]
109
00:06:38,541 --> 00:06:41,141
-[Matt] You all right?
-Hey. Is it all right if I...?
110
00:06:41,581 --> 00:06:45,141
Just a mad rush getting out
of the house this morning, you know.
111
00:06:46,381 --> 00:06:48,061
I know you've been sleeping here.
112
00:06:50,141 --> 00:06:50,981
Right.
113
00:06:51,061 --> 00:06:53,261
Look, I'm shacked up with June now,
114
00:06:53,781 --> 00:06:56,221
so my flat is just sitting there empty.
115
00:06:56,901 --> 00:06:59,261
And it's council,
so I don't want to give that up.
116
00:06:59,341 --> 00:07:01,421
Well, you're welcome to stay there
as long as you need.
117
00:07:01,981 --> 00:07:03,581
That means a lot. Thanks, Lenny.
118
00:07:05,021 --> 00:07:06,181
What happened, anyway?
119
00:07:06,661 --> 00:07:09,021
[Matt] I don't think anything happened,
like, specific.
120
00:07:09,421 --> 00:07:12,261
I think she just needed a moment
to take a deep breath and...
121
00:07:13,341 --> 00:07:15,221
figure it all out, and, uh, yeah...
122
00:07:16,141 --> 00:07:17,621
I'm giving her that moment.
123
00:07:19,421 --> 00:07:21,421
-A favor for a favor?
-Mm-hmm.
124
00:07:21,501 --> 00:07:25,421
Getting a bit of pressure from June
to get her kid some work experience.
125
00:07:25,501 --> 00:07:27,461
Uh... um, we can't afford it.
126
00:07:27,541 --> 00:07:29,901
-I'm sorry.
-No, just work experience, no money.
127
00:07:30,341 --> 00:07:32,261
She just wants him out of the house,
I think.
128
00:07:32,341 --> 00:07:33,181
Right.
129
00:07:33,661 --> 00:07:34,621
Uh...
130
00:07:35,061 --> 00:07:36,861
Yes, of course.
131
00:07:36,941 --> 00:07:37,941
-Great.
-[Matt] Yeah.
132
00:07:38,021 --> 00:07:40,341
I'll tell June. Thanks, Matt.
133
00:07:40,421 --> 00:07:41,741
Thank you, Lenny, yeah.
134
00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:48,581
Hiya.
135
00:07:48,661 --> 00:07:49,861
-[Matt] Hi.
-You busy?
136
00:07:50,341 --> 00:07:51,381
No, come in.
137
00:08:00,261 --> 00:08:02,741
Sorry to hear about your marriage ending
and all that.
138
00:08:03,821 --> 00:08:04,821
Thanks, yeah.
139
00:08:06,741 --> 00:08:08,581
You're a very lovely man, though.
140
00:08:10,621 --> 00:08:13,541
-Sorry, what...?
-Kind. Intelligent.
141
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:15,221
Smart.
142
00:08:16,301 --> 00:08:17,221
'Andsome.
143
00:08:17,861 --> 00:08:18,701
Perfect.
144
00:08:18,941 --> 00:08:20,861
[splutters] Thanks.
145
00:08:20,941 --> 00:08:23,741
We've kept this relationship
completely professional until now,
146
00:08:23,821 --> 00:08:25,101
and I appreciate that,
147
00:08:25,821 --> 00:08:28,821
but I just want you to know
that if you ever did make a move, I--
148
00:08:28,901 --> 00:08:29,941
A move?
149
00:08:31,701 --> 00:08:32,861
[Kath] Yeah, you know.
150
00:08:33,901 --> 00:08:35,061
I've always liked you.
151
00:08:36,981 --> 00:08:39,541
So, you know, if ever you wanted to, um...
152
00:08:40,581 --> 00:08:41,581
meet up...
153
00:08:42,541 --> 00:08:43,581
outside of work...
154
00:08:45,181 --> 00:08:46,341
you know, for some fun?
155
00:08:49,701 --> 00:08:51,421
Then... I'm up for it.
156
00:08:51,901 --> 00:08:52,901
Are you?
157
00:09:00,221 --> 00:09:01,261
See you later.
158
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:15,661
[Tony] Don't sit in my chair.
159
00:09:24,141 --> 00:09:24,981
You all right?
160
00:09:26,221 --> 00:09:27,941
Kath just said she likes me.
161
00:09:29,061 --> 00:09:29,981
Good.
162
00:09:30,061 --> 00:09:31,821
-No, like, she fancies me.
-[sniggers]
163
00:09:32,821 --> 00:09:33,821
What, are you 13?
164
00:09:34,221 --> 00:09:35,301
It's awkward.
165
00:09:36,061 --> 00:09:37,181
Don't worry about it.
166
00:09:39,141 --> 00:09:40,141
All right.
167
00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:42,141
What about you, you OK?
168
00:09:42,221 --> 00:09:44,461
Yeah, I'm just trying to be more zen.
169
00:09:45,581 --> 00:09:47,421
Wow... OK.
170
00:09:48,301 --> 00:09:49,741
Um... Well, I tell you what,
171
00:09:49,821 --> 00:09:52,501
you should come to the meditation class
I go to after work.
172
00:09:52,581 --> 00:09:53,661
Every Tuesday.
173
00:09:54,021 --> 00:09:55,221
It's a bit of yoga,
174
00:09:55,621 --> 00:09:58,221
a bit of... Don't shake your head,
you haven't heard what it is yet.
175
00:09:58,301 --> 00:09:59,981
-Yoga, a bit of philosophy...
-Mm.
176
00:10:00,061 --> 00:10:01,741
-...which you like, don't you?
-Yeah.
177
00:10:01,821 --> 00:10:03,061
Right. So, what do you think?
178
00:10:03,141 --> 00:10:04,141
-Don't just--
-No.
179
00:10:05,461 --> 00:10:06,581
Come on, please?
180
00:10:07,061 --> 00:10:08,821
I'm having a shit time as well, OK?
181
00:10:08,901 --> 00:10:11,861
I'm alone. I'm sleeping on a floor.
182
00:10:11,941 --> 00:10:12,941
[Tony] That's zen.
183
00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:16,341
-Uh...
-Like Mr. Miyagi. They love a floor.
184
00:10:17,061 --> 00:10:18,661
"They"? You... [frustrated sigh]
185
00:10:19,021 --> 00:10:19,901
Right.
186
00:10:22,141 --> 00:10:24,101
-Please?
-Oh, for fuck's sake.
187
00:10:26,021 --> 00:10:26,981
All right.
188
00:10:27,381 --> 00:10:28,541
-Thank you.
-Is that it?
189
00:10:28,621 --> 00:10:30,581
Yeah. Yes, that's...
190
00:10:31,101 --> 00:10:31,941
-fine.
-Good.
191
00:10:32,781 --> 00:10:34,701
Don't tell anyone about... Kath.
192
00:10:34,781 --> 00:10:36,141
I'd already forgotten that.
193
00:10:36,221 --> 00:10:37,261
-Perfect.
-All right?
194
00:10:37,341 --> 00:10:38,981
-Yeah, good. I'm... Yeah.
-Good.
195
00:10:41,461 --> 00:10:42,941
Don't tell anyone?
196
00:10:50,061 --> 00:10:50,981
[sighs]
197
00:10:58,101 --> 00:10:59,741
See, all respectable again.
198
00:11:00,781 --> 00:11:03,461
-Had a bit of bed head in the back there.
-[Tony] Hiya.
199
00:11:03,781 --> 00:11:05,301
-Hi.
-Hi, Dad.
200
00:11:07,421 --> 00:11:08,461
[Tony sighs]
201
00:11:09,061 --> 00:11:12,101
I, uh... just interviewed
a hundred-year-old woman.
202
00:11:12,181 --> 00:11:13,461
-Oh, yeah?
-Funny.
203
00:11:14,941 --> 00:11:15,781
And, uh...
204
00:11:17,101 --> 00:11:20,181
Lenny asked me
how it was going with the nurse.
205
00:11:21,661 --> 00:11:24,501
I said, uh... we're just friends 'cause...
206
00:11:26,221 --> 00:11:29,381
you'd said I wasn't over... Lisa.
207
00:11:29,461 --> 00:11:31,581
And did you say you agreed?
208
00:11:32,781 --> 00:11:33,781
Yeah, course. Yeah.
209
00:11:34,981 --> 00:11:36,021
What did he say?
210
00:11:36,101 --> 00:11:39,501
He said I shouldn't wait around forever
or I'll miss the boat. [chuckles]
211
00:11:40,621 --> 00:11:41,461
Mm...
212
00:11:42,101 --> 00:11:43,101
[Tony] So...
213
00:11:45,941 --> 00:11:47,501
Have you not told him my name?
214
00:11:48,101 --> 00:11:48,981
What do you mean?
215
00:11:49,061 --> 00:11:51,261
He said, "How's it going with the nurse?"
216
00:11:51,661 --> 00:11:52,581
[Tony] Uh...
217
00:11:52,661 --> 00:11:55,941
Yeah, I'm sure I have.
That wasn't really the point of the story.
218
00:11:56,501 --> 00:11:57,781
-[grunts]
-Joe?
219
00:11:58,141 --> 00:11:58,981
What?
220
00:11:59,061 --> 00:12:00,061
You're Joe.
221
00:12:01,381 --> 00:12:02,381
Joe, your brother?
222
00:12:02,461 --> 00:12:03,661
Hello, mate.
223
00:12:05,501 --> 00:12:09,261
I do look a bit like him. I mean,
he's been dead ten years, but still...
224
00:12:09,821 --> 00:12:10,981
What, Joe's dead?
225
00:12:11,061 --> 00:12:12,141
[Tony sighs]
226
00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:15,701
Oh, that's right, yeah. Joe's dead.
Yeah. Lovely fella.
227
00:12:17,061 --> 00:12:19,621
So, you're Joe's boy?
228
00:12:20,621 --> 00:12:21,701
I'm your boy, Dad.
229
00:12:22,941 --> 00:12:24,021
Am I Joe?
230
00:12:24,101 --> 00:12:25,141
Fuck me.
231
00:12:25,221 --> 00:12:29,021
And just for the record, I didn't declare
that we would just be friends.
232
00:12:29,101 --> 00:12:31,261
When I said
I didn't think you were over your wife,
233
00:12:31,341 --> 00:12:34,701
I just thought it might, I don't know,
gee you up a bit to be ready.
234
00:12:34,781 --> 00:12:36,101
Not just say, "Do you know what?
235
00:12:36,181 --> 00:12:38,181
That's all right.
Let's just be friends, eh?"
236
00:12:38,261 --> 00:12:41,061
Well, all I was doing was
agreeing with your observation
237
00:12:41,141 --> 00:12:42,221
that I wasn't over Lisa--
238
00:12:42,301 --> 00:12:44,501
Do you know what? It's fine.
Just don't worry about it.
239
00:12:44,581 --> 00:12:45,701
-Right.
-[nurse] You know.
240
00:12:45,781 --> 00:12:47,461
-All right, gorgeous?
-[nurse] Oh!
241
00:12:47,981 --> 00:12:49,061
Hiya.
242
00:12:49,141 --> 00:12:51,581
-[man] Where is she?
-[nurse ]She's in her room.
243
00:12:52,181 --> 00:12:54,941
-All right. See you later, babe.
-[nurse chuckles]
244
00:12:57,501 --> 00:12:58,461
Who's that?
245
00:12:58,541 --> 00:13:01,221
Simon. He's the son
of one of the new residents.
246
00:13:01,301 --> 00:13:02,141
Right.
247
00:13:02,821 --> 00:13:04,021
He's nice.
248
00:13:04,941 --> 00:13:05,941
He winked.
249
00:13:06,781 --> 00:13:09,421
He said, "See you later, babe,"
and winked.
250
00:13:10,501 --> 00:13:11,341
So?
251
00:13:11,861 --> 00:13:13,141
So... [chuckles]
252
00:13:14,821 --> 00:13:15,861
Right. Anyway...
253
00:13:16,861 --> 00:13:17,861
I'd better get on.
254
00:13:19,301 --> 00:13:20,421
See you later, babe.
255
00:13:25,181 --> 00:13:27,101
[Tony] I feel... panicked
256
00:13:27,901 --> 00:13:28,901
all the time.
257
00:13:29,541 --> 00:13:32,101
Like... I'm going to do the wrong thing.
258
00:13:32,181 --> 00:13:34,701
So... I don't do anything.
259
00:13:36,821 --> 00:13:40,221
And that's why I think I'm going to
blow it with the nurse, but...
260
00:13:41,501 --> 00:13:43,821
Concentrate on getting better.
She'll wait.
261
00:13:44,581 --> 00:13:45,701
If you want her to.
262
00:13:46,101 --> 00:13:47,541
I'm not sure I'm worth...
263
00:13:48,301 --> 00:13:50,261
waiting for. I'm embarrassed...
264
00:13:50,981 --> 00:13:52,781
that I ever acted the way I did.
265
00:13:53,741 --> 00:13:55,061
Whatever gets you better.
266
00:13:56,381 --> 00:13:58,381
Yeah. I'm not better, but...
267
00:13:59,301 --> 00:14:01,101
I'm not gonna stick my head
in the oven.
268
00:14:02,541 --> 00:14:04,341
I doubt you know where the oven is.
269
00:14:06,621 --> 00:14:08,141
-Good one!
-[Anne chuckles]
270
00:14:08,821 --> 00:14:10,021
You were in pain.
271
00:14:12,181 --> 00:14:14,261
Yeah, that's what
I'm embarrassed about, really.
272
00:14:14,661 --> 00:14:15,701
Dying of cancer,
273
00:14:16,781 --> 00:14:17,901
that's being in pain.
274
00:14:18,381 --> 00:14:19,381
Actual pain.
275
00:14:19,821 --> 00:14:21,301
I felt a bit sorry for myself.
276
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:22,861
I still do.
277
00:14:23,541 --> 00:14:24,541
But, uh...
278
00:14:25,501 --> 00:14:26,541
I realized that...
279
00:14:27,541 --> 00:14:29,341
death will come soon enough, so...
280
00:14:30,301 --> 00:14:33,101
And there's nothing to fear about it
because...
281
00:14:35,221 --> 00:14:37,101
you know, no feelings to worry about.
282
00:14:37,861 --> 00:14:40,021
Not mine, anyway. Just...
283
00:14:42,101 --> 00:14:43,541
you know, peace and quiet.
284
00:14:45,021 --> 00:14:48,901
I am trying to work out if there's a way
I can still carry on annoying people,
285
00:14:48,981 --> 00:14:50,461
after I die, but I haven't...
286
00:14:50,541 --> 00:14:52,101
-[Anne laughs]
-I haven't cracked it yet.
287
00:14:52,181 --> 00:14:55,181
So, I'm just gonna have to make the most
of that when I'm alive.
288
00:14:55,741 --> 00:14:57,221
-It's a hobby.
-Yeah.
289
00:14:58,901 --> 00:14:59,821
Exactly.
290
00:15:00,181 --> 00:15:02,061
Just to arseholes, though. That's...
291
00:15:02,741 --> 00:15:04,941
you know, I'm trying to be nice
to the people...
292
00:15:05,981 --> 00:15:07,461
who are nice to me, at least.
293
00:15:09,261 --> 00:15:11,021
I realized that everyone's struggling,
294
00:15:11,101 --> 00:15:13,621
and, um, I feel
that I should help the people...
295
00:15:14,661 --> 00:15:15,701
who helped me.
296
00:15:16,941 --> 00:15:21,541
I'm actually going to a meditation...
yoga... thing tonight.
297
00:15:22,381 --> 00:15:23,381
It's a favor...
298
00:15:24,221 --> 00:15:25,861
for my brother-in-law, who...
299
00:15:26,821 --> 00:15:29,261
is separated from his wife, and...
300
00:15:30,901 --> 00:15:32,701
he could do with the company, so...
301
00:15:33,741 --> 00:15:34,661
you know.
302
00:15:36,061 --> 00:15:36,941
Lovely.
303
00:15:38,301 --> 00:15:39,221
Mm.
304
00:15:43,981 --> 00:15:45,101
[door opens]
305
00:15:45,621 --> 00:15:46,541
Oh...
306
00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:48,661
Coffee. I am gasping.
307
00:15:50,901 --> 00:15:52,181
-Come in.
-[Roxy] What?
308
00:15:52,821 --> 00:15:53,701
Nothing.
309
00:15:54,341 --> 00:15:56,501
-What, me just letting myself in?
-Well,
310
00:15:56,581 --> 00:15:58,821
some would've knocked.
I could've been naked.
311
00:15:59,461 --> 00:16:01,741
Uh... I could see through the door
you weren't naked.
312
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:03,981
Well, that doesn't make any sense.
313
00:16:04,101 --> 00:16:07,901
If I had have been naked, you'd look
through the door and see me naked.
314
00:16:07,981 --> 00:16:09,661
Yeah, and I wouldn't have come in.
315
00:16:10,421 --> 00:16:11,941
But you'd have seen me naked.
316
00:16:12,021 --> 00:16:13,581
[chuckles] Wouldn't have bothered me.
317
00:16:14,421 --> 00:16:16,701
That's all right, then.
What would you have done?
318
00:16:17,461 --> 00:16:19,581
-What do you mean?
-You come to the door,
319
00:16:19,661 --> 00:16:21,861
you see me naked, you don't come in,
320
00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:23,821
what then?
321
00:16:24,341 --> 00:16:25,381
I'd have knocked.
322
00:16:25,821 --> 00:16:27,901
So, now, I'm here naked,
323
00:16:28,501 --> 00:16:32,141
I hear a knock, I look up,
I see you looking through at me,
324
00:16:32,221 --> 00:16:33,861
what do you do, fucking wave?
325
00:16:34,701 --> 00:16:36,181
[chuckling] I don't know!
326
00:16:36,261 --> 00:16:38,821
Maybe I wouldn't knock,
maybe I'd just sneak off.
327
00:16:39,861 --> 00:16:41,101
Anyway...
328
00:16:41,181 --> 00:16:45,301
why are you sat at a table naked
like some weird Monty Python sketch?
329
00:16:45,381 --> 00:16:46,741
That's my business.
330
00:16:46,821 --> 00:16:48,301
My house, my rules.
331
00:16:49,901 --> 00:16:51,861
-Do you sit at the table naked, then?
-No.
332
00:16:51,941 --> 00:16:54,701
I've got a dog.
I don't want her seeing that. [sniggers]
333
00:16:59,741 --> 00:17:01,501
What do you miss about her, though?
334
00:17:02,461 --> 00:17:04,101
Everything. You know, I...
335
00:17:04,861 --> 00:17:07,021
I miss her liking me.
336
00:17:07,901 --> 00:17:08,861
Um...
337
00:17:09,381 --> 00:17:11,501
I hate to think
I've upset her in some way.
338
00:17:12,181 --> 00:17:14,181
Or that she just doesn't love me anymore.
339
00:17:16,141 --> 00:17:17,061
Um...
340
00:17:19,741 --> 00:17:20,861
Don't worry about it.
341
00:17:24,021 --> 00:17:25,701
What do you mean?
342
00:17:26,221 --> 00:17:27,501
Is that advice?
343
00:17:27,581 --> 00:17:28,541
Yeah.
344
00:17:29,221 --> 00:17:30,861
Just don't worry about it, mate.
345
00:17:32,981 --> 00:17:35,621
Yeah... Just not that easy, though, is it?
[chuckles]
346
00:17:35,701 --> 00:17:39,141
You know, it's like saying,
"Don't worry that you're bleeding."
347
00:17:39,541 --> 00:17:41,501
You know, just by saying that,
it doesn't go away.
348
00:17:41,581 --> 00:17:44,421
I was bleeding from the anus
for a month last year
349
00:17:44,501 --> 00:17:45,941
and I never went to the doctor.
350
00:17:47,341 --> 00:17:48,181
Right.
351
00:17:50,221 --> 00:17:51,301
It just went away.
352
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:56,901
But, I mean,
you're the doctor in this, aren't you?
353
00:17:56,981 --> 00:17:58,501
So are you saying
I shouldn't go to you?
354
00:17:58,581 --> 00:18:01,181
No, of course not.
What I'm saying is you've got to ignore
355
00:18:01,261 --> 00:18:03,621
worrying about her and start doing stuff.
356
00:18:03,701 --> 00:18:04,741
[Matt] Yeah.
357
00:18:04,821 --> 00:18:07,061
You should come out with me,
Ratty, and the Nonce.
358
00:18:07,501 --> 00:18:09,741
-The Nonce?
-Real name Ian Trouton,
359
00:18:10,421 --> 00:18:13,061
but we call him "the Nonce"
or "Pedo Ian."
360
00:18:14,301 --> 00:18:17,741
I mean, he's not a real kiddy fiddler.
It's a... it's an in-joke.
361
00:18:17,821 --> 00:18:18,821
Oh. [chuckles]
362
00:18:19,461 --> 00:18:21,821
He fucked a dwarf once
when he was off his head.
363
00:18:22,821 --> 00:18:23,901
[laughs]
364
00:18:24,461 --> 00:18:26,301
He said it was like fucking a child.
365
00:18:27,741 --> 00:18:30,861
But legal. Although, should it be? Urgh.
366
00:18:34,821 --> 00:18:38,061
Um... I would go to the doctor
about your anus, by the way.
367
00:18:41,541 --> 00:18:44,021
Hiya. Could I just use your bathroom?
368
00:18:44,101 --> 00:18:47,141
-[sighs] All right. Upstairs.
-Ta.
369
00:18:50,941 --> 00:18:52,061
[Brandy whines]
370
00:18:53,261 --> 00:18:54,381
[snaps fingers]
371
00:18:55,901 --> 00:18:58,061
All right. Come here,I want to show you something.
372
00:18:58,141 --> 00:19:00,701
Tony, do you want to explainwhat this is, please?
373
00:19:00,821 --> 00:19:02,341
Oh, um...
374
00:19:02,421 --> 00:19:06,661
I'm holding a sweepstakeon how long the marriage will last,
375
00:19:06,741 --> 00:19:08,261
so you can bet on what you think.
376
00:19:08,341 --> 00:19:11,101
Choices are: "under a month,""one to six months,"
377
00:19:11,181 --> 00:19:12,461
"six months to a year,"
378
00:19:12,541 --> 00:19:15,781
"one to two years," "two to four years,"or "four to ten years."
379
00:19:15,861 --> 00:19:17,541
-I put "four to ten years."-Oh, thanks.
380
00:19:17,621 --> 00:19:18,701
-You're welcome.-Yeah.
381
00:19:19,661 --> 00:19:21,181
I'll go "two to four" myself.
382
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:22,661
[guffawing]
383
00:19:22,741 --> 00:19:25,541
-[Tony] Fivers. Give us your fiver.-[Matt] "Under a month," that's mine.
384
00:19:29,861 --> 00:19:30,701
[Tony] Right...
385
00:19:32,101 --> 00:19:33,101
What's he doing?
386
00:19:34,101 --> 00:19:35,101
Good girl.
387
00:19:40,941 --> 00:19:43,021
Mate, I've got to go out.
388
00:19:43,101 --> 00:19:45,421
[Pat] All right, see you later.
I'll lock up.
389
00:19:45,781 --> 00:19:47,541
No, you won't. Get out.
390
00:19:48,381 --> 00:19:50,541
-[water sloshing]
-[Tony] What the fuck?
391
00:19:54,581 --> 00:19:57,261
Fuck me!
I thought you were having a piss.
392
00:19:57,341 --> 00:20:00,301
No, I've got to go out after,
so I thought I'd have a wash.
393
00:20:00,381 --> 00:20:01,461
[Tony] Unbelievable!
394
00:20:01,981 --> 00:20:02,981
Get out.
395
00:20:04,261 --> 00:20:05,181
Out!
396
00:20:06,341 --> 00:20:07,621
Well, turn round, then!
397
00:20:08,781 --> 00:20:09,901
Fucking hell!
398
00:20:11,141 --> 00:20:12,141
All clean!
399
00:20:12,821 --> 00:20:16,101
Do you know how fucking mental it is,
a postman having a bath on his round?
400
00:20:16,501 --> 00:20:18,141
-Why?
-It just is.
401
00:20:18,221 --> 00:20:20,741
There's nothing weird
about helping out a mate.
402
00:20:20,821 --> 00:20:24,301
I need to see a potential flat share
later, don't I? I've been homeless.
403
00:20:24,381 --> 00:20:26,181
Been sleeping in the depot.
404
00:20:26,261 --> 00:20:29,301
I didn't want to turn up all scruffy,
did I, stinking of BO?
405
00:20:29,381 --> 00:20:32,501
Oh, this is typical.
I try and be more chilled.
406
00:20:32,581 --> 00:20:35,221
The reason I'm in a hurry is
that I've got a meditation class tonight
407
00:20:35,301 --> 00:20:36,661
to try and be more zen,
408
00:20:36,741 --> 00:20:39,541
and then shit like this happens
to wind me the fuck up again.
409
00:20:39,621 --> 00:20:41,781
Don't think the Dalai Lama'd be like that,
would he?
410
00:20:41,861 --> 00:20:43,541
Let's see, shall we?
Go to his house tomorrow
411
00:20:43,621 --> 00:20:46,701
and start washing your fucking arse
in his sink, see what he does.
412
00:20:46,781 --> 00:20:48,901
-Is that my aftershave?
-Yeah. Nice, innit?
413
00:20:48,981 --> 00:20:50,261
-Fuckin' hell.
-Expensive.
414
00:20:51,661 --> 00:20:52,501
Out.
415
00:20:54,021 --> 00:20:55,021
See ya, mate.
416
00:20:56,581 --> 00:20:57,501
Prat.
417
00:21:00,741 --> 00:21:02,181
Just wiggle it.
418
00:21:03,021 --> 00:21:05,461
And if you want
to get into your positions, please.
419
00:21:05,741 --> 00:21:06,621
[Matt] Hey.
420
00:21:07,021 --> 00:21:08,821
Hi, Matt. Hi.
421
00:21:09,341 --> 00:21:11,221
-Simon, this is Tony. He's--
-Welcome.
422
00:21:11,301 --> 00:21:13,541
He's not done this before,
so go easy on him.
423
00:21:14,861 --> 00:21:17,621
Nothing to be scared of.
We're a very friendly tribe.
424
00:21:18,621 --> 00:21:20,101
-OK.
-All right.
425
00:21:21,861 --> 00:21:22,901
Where's your mind?
426
00:21:23,461 --> 00:21:25,181
-Where's my...?
-Where's your mind?
427
00:21:25,261 --> 00:21:27,341
Don't think about it too much,
just answer.
428
00:21:27,421 --> 00:21:29,261
Uh... in my brain.
429
00:21:30,261 --> 00:21:31,341
-No.
-[Tony] No?
430
00:21:31,821 --> 00:21:32,821
In my gut.
431
00:21:34,581 --> 00:21:36,421
-No.
-I don't know. Where's my mind?
432
00:21:36,821 --> 00:21:37,901
It's in...
433
00:21:38,541 --> 00:21:40,301
every cell of your body.
434
00:21:42,741 --> 00:21:43,701
OK.
435
00:21:44,661 --> 00:21:46,741
I want you to really think about that.
436
00:21:48,781 --> 00:21:49,901
On all fours.
437
00:21:50,421 --> 00:21:52,221
-Please.
-OK.
438
00:21:52,861 --> 00:21:53,941
-Shoes off, Tony.
-No.
439
00:21:54,501 --> 00:21:55,741
-No?
-No.
440
00:21:57,741 --> 00:21:59,501
-[Tony sighs]
-[chimes tinkling]
441
00:22:04,741 --> 00:22:06,581
So, let's start with a deep breath.
442
00:22:06,661 --> 00:22:07,821
[inhales deeply]
443
00:22:07,901 --> 00:22:09,381
Inhale.
444
00:22:09,461 --> 00:22:11,221
[class inhales]
445
00:22:11,301 --> 00:22:12,621
Lift your tailbone.
446
00:22:13,101 --> 00:22:14,861
Heart out, push away the floor.
447
00:22:15,781 --> 00:22:19,181
-And exhale, sigh out the pain.
-[loud exhaling]
448
00:22:20,741 --> 00:22:22,661
And shine your heart forward.
449
00:22:23,261 --> 00:22:25,141
And gaze into your pelvis.
450
00:22:25,941 --> 00:22:27,901
And look out of your third eye.
[sniffs]
451
00:22:28,581 --> 00:22:29,821
-You hear that?
-Yeah, just...
452
00:22:29,901 --> 00:22:31,701
Let's do that ten times. [Simon sniffs]
453
00:22:36,621 --> 00:22:39,581
[Simon slurps] Ah!
454
00:22:39,701 --> 00:22:40,661
Are you joking?
455
00:22:40,981 --> 00:22:42,621
[slurping] Mm.
456
00:22:43,461 --> 00:22:45,581
Green tea. Delicious.
457
00:22:45,661 --> 00:22:47,301
-Sounds it!
-Shh! Tony...
458
00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:48,701
[slurping]
459
00:22:49,141 --> 00:22:50,141
[sniffing]
460
00:22:50,221 --> 00:22:51,221
Fucking hell.
461
00:22:51,701 --> 00:22:52,581
You OK, Tony?
462
00:22:52,661 --> 00:22:53,701
-Yep.
-[Simon] Yeah?
463
00:22:54,381 --> 00:22:55,381
OK, good.
464
00:22:55,901 --> 00:22:56,861
[sniffs, snorts]
465
00:22:56,941 --> 00:22:58,101
Oh, fuck!
466
00:22:58,181 --> 00:23:00,661
-Just don't listen to it.
-[Simon] And keep going, guys.
467
00:23:00,781 --> 00:23:01,861
-[sniffs]
-Got a little cold?
468
00:23:03,021 --> 00:23:04,581
Never. No.
469
00:23:04,661 --> 00:23:07,141
-Oh!
-[Simon] Illness is a state of mind.
470
00:23:07,581 --> 00:23:10,461
I don't want to feel ill,
I don't want to feel pain.
471
00:23:10,901 --> 00:23:13,461
[sarcastic laugh]
You're going about it the wrong way.
472
00:23:13,541 --> 00:23:16,381
-Please don't.
-Any bad things that have happened to you,
473
00:23:16,861 --> 00:23:18,021
you must've welcomed them in.
474
00:23:18,101 --> 00:23:19,901
No. No way.
475
00:23:19,981 --> 00:23:21,341
We have a choice. [sniffs]
476
00:23:21,421 --> 00:23:22,341
Fuck that!
477
00:23:22,421 --> 00:23:24,301
-Please.
-[Tony] That's ridiculous.
478
00:23:24,381 --> 00:23:28,581
Wind chimes? Slurping? Sniffing?
How is that relaxing?
479
00:23:28,661 --> 00:23:29,701
It's disgusting.
480
00:23:30,701 --> 00:23:33,541
I'm off to get pissed out of my mind
in every cell of my body.
481
00:23:35,381 --> 00:23:36,341
See you next Tuesday.
482
00:23:36,421 --> 00:23:39,181
You're not wrong there,
you fucking snot-curdling cunt!
483
00:23:41,901 --> 00:23:43,261
OK. Um...
484
00:23:44,061 --> 00:23:46,501
-Everyone into plank, please.
-[Matt] Great.
485
00:23:47,181 --> 00:23:49,901
Thank you.
What was that, about two minutes?
486
00:23:49,981 --> 00:23:51,301
I don't know, I couldn't.
487
00:23:51,741 --> 00:23:53,301
I thought you were feeling better.
488
00:23:54,581 --> 00:23:55,581
I am now.
489
00:23:57,101 --> 00:23:59,061
["These Days" by Jackson Browne plays]
490
00:24:10,581 --> 00:24:14,021
♪ Well, I've been out walkin' ♪
491
00:24:17,261 --> 00:24:23,901
♪ I don't do that much talkin'These days ♪
492
00:24:24,341 --> 00:24:31,141
♪ These days ♪
493
00:24:31,781 --> 00:24:34,941
♪These days, I seem to think a lot ♪
494
00:24:35,661 --> 00:24:41,861
♪ About the things that I forgot to do ♪
495
00:24:42,141 --> 00:24:45,461
♪ For you ♪
496
00:24:45,781 --> 00:24:51,181
♪And all the timesI had the chance to... ♪
497
00:24:51,261 --> 00:24:54,101
[Tony] Fucking hell, look at that!Pissed again!
498
00:24:54,341 --> 00:24:56,181
-Pfft!
-[Lisa laughs]
499
00:24:56,341 --> 00:24:59,781
-Oh, like you're sober? Don't.-[Tony] Yeah, but I can hold my drink.
500
00:25:00,981 --> 00:25:04,221
[slurring] Yeah, but you're a man,you've got a bigger liver!
501
00:25:04,501 --> 00:25:06,701
-[Tony chuckles] "Lidver..."
-[Lisa giggles]
502
00:25:07,221 --> 00:25:09,901
[Lisa] When we get through two bottlesof wine a night,
503
00:25:09,981 --> 00:25:12,061
it's killing me quickerthan it's killing you!
504
00:25:12,141 --> 00:25:14,021
[Tony] Well, one of ushas got to die first.
505
00:25:15,021 --> 00:25:18,021
-What, so it might as well be me?
-[Tony] I'll drink to that!
506
00:25:18,101 --> 00:25:21,301
Oh, right. OK. Cheers.This is to me dying first.
507
00:25:21,381 --> 00:25:23,821
-[Tony] Cheers!-Cheers. [Lisa laughs]
508
00:25:28,461 --> 00:25:29,501
[sniffles]
35210
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