All language subtitles for The Greatest American Hero s02e12 Just Another Three Ring Circus

Look at what's happened to me

I can't believe it myself

Suddenly I'm up on top of the world

It should have been somebody else

Believe it or not I'm walking on air

I never thought I could feel so free

Flying away on a wing and a prayer

Who could it be

Believe it or not it's just me

Just like the light of a new day

It hit me from out of the blue

Breaking me out of the spell I was in

Making all of my wishes come true

Believe it or not I'm walking on air

I never thought I could feel so free

Flying away on a wing and a prayer

Who could it be

Believe it or not it's just me

Who could it be

Believe it or not it's just me

Bill, your director would love to have a
little chat with you, if you've got a second.

Take a second.

Time for the star of the bureau to jump
back into action on a very, very hot case.

- Oh, shut up!
- I beg your pardon?

Oh, no, no. I don't mean you, sir.
Oh, yeah, the deep forest green.

Oh, yeah, go great
with the Philippine mahogany...

and the 16th-century sofas
and the French tie-back drapes.

Gorgeous. I really love it.
Is that some kind of crack?

I spend one hellacious amount
of time in this factory, mister,

and it seems to me,
given my efficiency rating,

the bureau can afford to spend a couple of
bucks to make me as comfortable as possible.

You got a problem
with that? No, sir. No.

I'm delighted
to hear it.

You think you're doing pretty
good, don't you, Maxwell?

Except you're
a one-man band.

You step on regulations,
you ignore dress codes.

You crash more cars than
a college fraternity.

Despite your record,
you are lousy for morale around here...

because younger agents are starting
to idolize you and your offbeat style.

Really? No kidding.
Are they?

- I'm sorry.
- You think you've been getting stinking cases up till now?

Oh, Bill, I got
some cases smell so bad,

I've been afraid to open them in public.

Little itty-bitty stinkers.

And as of now,
you are going to be in charge...

of every yahoo deal
that comes through the door.

Fun, huh? Oh, sir, I think
you're making a mistake.

I want you to find me
a clown, Bill.

His name is Uri Yovanovitch.
He's a Polish national.

His speciality is getting out of a two-foot high
squashed car, walking backwards on his hands.

You two oughta get along like brothers.
All you gotta do is find him.

A... Polish clown?

Takes one to find one
is my theory.

Oh, yes! And, Bill?

I spoke to the motor pool about
reassigning you a new vehicle.

Being as you're averaging
about one a month,

we wanted to get you one
we felt was expendable.

It's an undercover car.
Radio's underneath the seat.

You'll find it downstairs,
parked right behind the building.

It'll fit right in
at the circus.

Uh...

Guy hates me.
He really hates me.

Very disappointing.

Reading's under
state level,

vocab's under,
math is under.

Cyler's the only one that
bothered to do the essay.

Hey, man, I did the essay.
Come on. Fair is fair.

Right, Tony. Under "essay,"
the man writes,

"This is a essay on nothing."
Period.

- What is that?
- Mr. H., the test was really long.

You know, it was hard. Yeah, right.

I gave you guys reading assignments
that had all the material in it.

Obviously, no one
bothered to look at it.

Mr. H.? What?

Probably what happened is that, uh,
tomorrow's, like, Easter vacation, you know?

And, uh,
we were probably just...

really looking forward
to that.

Or, you know,
something like that.

I've been trying
to get a job, Mr. H.

I just didn't have time
to read all that stuff.

You're the one that's always saying that we
should get out and do something for ourselves.

That's the bell.
Get out of here.

Look, Mr. H.
We're really sorry, you know?

You guys want to screw around
with your lives, that's up to you.

You want to take it seriously,
I'll be here to help.

Right.

Ralph? How you doin'?

Terrible.
How are you doing? Worse.

Boy, I just went by Vice
Principal Knight's office.

He wants to discontinue
the special ed program...

because the kids did so bad
on the Ohio State tests.

Do you believe this car?

How in the world can you stick a prize
fed with a piece of junk like this?

If they just would've gotten familiar with
the material, Perpetrators will spot me...

just get familiar with it,
they would have done better.10 miles away.

I don't know.
I guess it was my fault.

I should've given them a quiz on Thursday.
Stinkers he's giving me.

Trying to show me. I'll show him.
I hate wasting my time with this stuff.

What are you talking about,
wasting my time? I'm not wasting my time.

My kids just don't understand how
important the test was. What kids?

My kids.

- In class.
- That's not a class, Ralph. That's a circus.

Speaking of circuses,
we're going to one right now.

You're gonna help me scare up a clown named
Uri Yovanovitch. Get in the car, please.

What? Carlisle just jumped
in my tree.

Gave me a Polish clown to find and a candy
apple with wheels to drive around in.

- I'm in a lot of trouble. Will you please get in?
- A clown? That's your case?

I know it's not a suit-class
problem, but I can't help it.

- I need your help. Now, come on.
- Oh, boy.

Well, why not? You know,
I'm not doing any good around here.

Where, uh...
Where'd you get this car?

Cracker Jack box.

When you're hunting a clown, you're supposed
to look like one. That's Carlisle's theory.

We're late
for a very important date.

Come on, Huckleberry.
I'll buy you a balloon.

This is one of the most famous
circuses in the entire world.

Yeah, yeah, right.
Okay, now.

The guy that filed the missing
persons report is Klaus Vorman.

He's the manager
of this outfit.

I think this is
a local cop job myself,

but these bunch of jugglers
just came in from Phoenix.

That puts it across state lines.
Local blues kicked it back to us.

Steady. And up, Alice.
Up, up, up!

Sit. Sit. Sit.

Sit. Up, up.

All right. All right.

Come to me.
Come to me.Uh... excuse me.

Uh, Uri Yovanovitch.
Where's his trailer?

Uh, just around
the corner.Okay. Thanks.

Sure. Come on, Ralph.
Around this way.

Hold this.

Anything?

No, nothing. Boy, look at this.

Oh, the guys at the bureau ever
get a load of this, and I'm cooked.

I'll never live it down.

Look at all this stuff, Bill.
Don't you love it?

You know what makes
a clown so special? Uh, Ralph?

I really don't need that.
Please give me a break.

We gotta find this guy, bing-bang-boom,
and get out of here before I'm ruined.

Look at this wig, Bill.

Did you know that a clown's wig and face
are registered? No other clown can use it.

Ralph? Please,
I don't need this, okay?

- Wait a minute. I'm getting something here.
- What?

Huh.
That's very strange.

What? What's going on?
You got the clown, or what?

No, a guy in an apartment,
Century City West Towers.

- It's very faint though.
- He's in trouble, in danger?

No, he's just walking around the
apartment, looking out the windows.

It's kind of faint, but that's all I got.
What was funny... I was getting his name.

- What is the name?
- Uh, Biff Anderson.

As I said, it was very faint.
That's all I got.

Okay. That's only a couple miles from here.
I'll check it out.

You prowl around here, put on the
funny nose and the baggy pants...

and vibe your vibes.

If you can find a way to join up with this
bunch of jugglers, it wouldn't be bad.

With the suit, you oughta fit right in.
I'll be back as soon as I can.

I like this guy, Uri.

- What are you talking about? You don't even know him.
- I'm in the vibe business.

He's a nice guy.
He's got a kid in Warsaw, a little girl.

And his parents were cobblers.
He misses 'em.

Ralph, try not to slide off
the table altogether, okay?

Yep. I like this guy.

Sue me. I like clowns.

Come one, come all.

The circus
is about to begin.

Up. Ta-da!
Ta-da-da-da!

All right.

Is she okay?

- It looked, I think, better on Uri.
- Oh, I'm, uh...

Erica Vanderland.

Hi. I'm... The Flying Vanderlands.

We are trapeze act
from Poland.

Oh. Oh, yes, yes.
I'm, uh... Excuse me.

Ralph Hinkley.
I'm from around here. Oh!

You are new with circus?

Uh, well, Uri was gonna get me
an audition with the circus,

but he's not here.

You are new human cannonball
he tell me about, no?

Right! Yes, I am!

Uh, I was gonna have an audition
with a Mr. Vorey or, uh...

Vorman. Vorman.

You, uh...
You know Uri well?

Uh, well... Uh... I know his
little girl in Warsaw...

and, you know, his family,
the... the cobblers.

They were...
Yeah, we're friends.

Uri is gone.

Uh, missing. Yes, I know.
Do you know where he is?

No. Nobody knows.
Is mystery.

Gee, I guess there's no one
that can, well, uh,

get me into the circus
then, huh?

I could possibly arrange
for Mr. Vorman to meet you.

You could? We talk to him
if you want.

Yes! I think you should take off
Uri's clown nose first.

Oh. Yeah.Yes.

Okay.

Yes? Evening. Mr. Anderson?

Ever heard of anybody named Uri
Yovanovitch or any other performer...

at the International
Circus Spectacular, huh?

How many times
do I have to tell you?

I don't know how you got my name or
why you're asking me these questions,

but the answer
is still no.

Thank you, sir. Sorry for the intrusion.
I'll let myself out.

Hey! What's going on
in there?

Open the door! Ralph, come in right now.
I need you.

- Century City condos, east tower, on the roof.
- What's that?

I'll see you tomorrow.
Bye.

Don't do it!

Bill?
Are you all right?

Lost 'em.
Lost 'em! Damn!

Hello.Hello.

Is he all right? I guess. He walked in
under his own power.

I couldn't follow him in. I'd probably
end up in the psychiatric ward.

Thank you for bringing these.
And what are you two guys up to this time?

We're chasing a clown.

And I'm trying to get into the circus.

Oh, terrific. I love it.

If I play my cards right,
I'm gonna end up as a human cannonball.

Ralph, please, I am very tired.
I have been in court all day.

Well, this is not my idea.
It's Bill's.

Okay, but it's my arm.
You did a wonderful job.

Now go back inside and count some
bedpans and let me get back to work.

Thank you. Hey, counselor!
You driving? Terrific!

Let's go.

The circus, Bill? You can't be serious.
Not tonight, sweetheart.

We missed
the last performance.

We're on our way to Century City
to hook up with Agent Carlisle.

A missing clown?
Now, is that really a case for the suit?

I didn't think so at first,
but when a bunch of guys on bat wings...

start floating in the window,
shooting up West L.A. high-rises,

I get terribly interested real quick.

I'm telling you. We've got a
major, major case here. I know it.

The old Maxwell smeller
can smell it!

Did you get anything else
at the circus?

Yeah, I found these matches
right there in Uri's trailer.

What? Give me a break.

That only works in the movies, Ralph.

With the matchbook cover that becomes
the, uh, most important clue.

If he was seeing a dating service,
there must be somebody there.

Will you please just relax?
Forget it.

We have a kidnapping.
Biff Anderson.

I don't know who he was or
is, but he is no clown.

This better be so clean it squeaks, Billy.

Oh. Ow! I see it. I see it.

Who are the people
in the car?

A couple of real nice kids
brought me from the hospital.

Obviously I couldn't drive with
a through hole in the wings.

No, no, no. Even old Simon Legree
could have seen that.

Huh, Mr. Carlisle?
Stay put, kids.

Come on. Let's go have some fun.
You're gonna enjoy this.

I'm looking forward to it.
Does it hurt? Not anymore.

Just seeing you
takes all the pain out.

I wish
I could change that.

Bill is not much
of a politician, is he?

Yup. It's one of the things
I like most about him.

A human cannonball,
huh?

Right place
at the right time.

An opportunity like that
doesn't come along every day.

Is this the, uh... the lock that
you blew off a little bit ago?

Uh... yeah.

Yeah.
What's going on here?

Well, I'll tell you what's
going on across town, Billy.

The mayor
is giving a dinner,

and I'm supposed to
be at it!

What's going on here
is your department,

and I seriously hope,
for your sake,

that it all
holds together.

Hey, you're late.
We already cut the cake an hour ago.

You what? Is this Biff Anderson's
apartment?

His apartment
and his birthday.

Biff! More guests.

Hey, may I help you? We want to see
Biff Anderson.

You're talking to him.
It's not the same guy.

Would you happen to have
any I.D., Mr. Anderson?

Do you?

Hmm, F.B.I.

We had a report
that there was, uh...

That you were kidnapped from
this apartment about an hour ago.

You're kidding. Excuse me.

We've been having a party here since 6:30.
What's going on here?

There are 20 witnesses in here. Come on.

Who are you people? You do have
an explanation, Bill?

Yeah, this window
was busted out completely.

They came down from the roof on
ropes, busted in here.

I chased them out this door,
all the way to the roof.

We had a firefight out there. There were
hollow points flying around like crazy.

I hate to be rude,
but we are having a party here.

Obviously, I have not
been kidnapped.

I don't know who you are, pal, or what's going
on here, but you are not Biff Anderson.

- I showed you my I.D.
- Yeah, so did the guy that I was talking to before.

Obviously,

Agent Maxwell
has made a mistake.

He does that.

Forgive the intrusion.Sure.

Oh! Happy birthday.

Thank you so much.

It's a matchbook, Ralph.
What does it look like?

It's the matchbook I found at Anderson's
apartment. Two On A Match, remember?

It's our hot clue
for the day.

How come when I find the
matchbook, it's a joke,

and when you find it,
it's a terrific hot clue?

Because suddenly it's my idea
instead of your idea. That's simple.

Boy, I love it when a case starts to gel.
Yeah, I can see that.

Carlisle's given me specific orders
to stay away from this Biff Anderson.

If I lay a glove on the guy,
he's gonna have my hide on a barn door.

The whole thing has to
tie up with the circus.

Ralph got the holograph
in Uri's tent.

That means Uri was thinking
about Biff Anderson...

or was involved with him
in some way.

Old Uri saw something he wasn't supposed
to see and got dropped into an early grave.

This is just a first-guess
scenario, but, uh, I think so.

Yeah, no one at the circus
seems to want to talk about it.

Another thing, Bill... you said that
these guys who kidnapped Biff Anderson...

flew in on hang gliders,
then rappelled down a 20-story building,

got him and then
left the same way.

You have to be awful well-trained
to do something like that.

Are you saying that a bunch of
circus performers did the job?

It makes sense, counselor.
It really does.

This is a circus caper if I ever saw one,
which, of course, I never did before.

But I think Ralph's
got a point here.

Since I can't go near Biff Anderson, the
counselor is gonna check in at Two On A Match...

and give us a lowdown on what Biff
Anderson's got to do with a dating service.

And I'm getting shot off in a cannon
at 10:00 a.m. tomorrow morning!

It doesn't have to do with anything,
but I just thought I would say it.

I mean, Ralph Hinkley
being shot out of a cannon?

How often does a guy get to be shot
out of a cannon like puffed rice?

Oh, brother. While all this is going
on, what are you gonna be doing?

I'm going undercover.

The two of you have
never seen anything...

until you see me work
from the inside.

You working
from the inside?

Will you beat it?
I don't want anybody to tie us together.

I thought you were
gonna work in security. I tried.

This is the only thing
they had open.

It's not even steady work.
They pay by the job.

I'm off for my audition. Break a leg, kid.

Ah, that's an old showbiz term.
It means "do good," okay?

Okay. Bill, by the way, you forgot a
little spot over there by the water pail.

Have a good day.

I'm Klaus Vorman. You are here to
show me we need a human cannonball.

- I'm your man.
- We shoot toward that field there.

You want man
to stand with net?

No, that won't be necessary.
I'm a fairly good tumbler.

Nice kitty.

Ralph! Ralph, where are you?

Fire.

Ralph.
Ralph, where are you?

Ralph? Kid, where are you?
Come in! I need ya!

Ralph?

Ralph!

Kid, I need you!

Ralph?
Kid! Kid, come in!

Bill, get out.

Get out. Go on. Watch me.
Come on. Come on.

Watch me. Watch me.

Right. It's okay, kitty. Calm down.
It's all right. It's all right.

It's okay.

Calm down, okay?

We have trouble,
I think.

The man who we see on the
roof, I try to kill him, but...

What man? I don't know.
The other...

The one
from the cannon?

He bent bars on cage.

You must go now.
Get floor plan at Two On A Match.

We must do job today.

Hi. I'm Pam Davidson.
I called.

Mm-hmm. I only have 40 minutes.
I have to be back in court.

Hi, Pam. Welcome to
Two On A Match.

Selecting a special friend is important.
It's something we shouldn't rush.

It's not like selecting
poultry at the market.

How beautifully put.

We're here to take
the guesswork out of dating.

I'd like you to fill out our matchmaker forms,
then we'll go right over to the video area.

One of our trained psychologists will
guide you through an informal chat...

that should help you to find
that special life mate.

I know you're trying to do your job,
but I really don't have time for that.

Well, as a matter of fact, maybe to speed
things along, I could walk you through, huh?

Do you like sailing, Pam?

Yes. Now, there's a coincidence.

- I just happen to have a 23-foot Cal at the marina.
- How nice.

And special clients, professional people,

I like to offer
our Golden Match special.

That includes dinner, dancing and a Sunday
sail with one of our professional matchmakers.

- Down, boy.
- Okay, Pam.

Now, I would like you to think
of me as your tour guide...

through this adventure in life
science and consciousness-raising.

You look like a tennis player.
Huh? Do you play tennis?

I bet you do, huh? I bet you do.

Weekend tennis.

I live at the marina.
How 'bout you, Pam?

Uh, can we get started?
I am trying a case this morning.

I've gotta be back
in court shortly.

Gee, I hate to rush initial
interviews, Pam. I'll tell you what.

Maybe... Maybe we could
scotch it for now...

and, uh, meet again
after work,

try the taping then.

Maybe I could buy you dinner and really
explain this wonderful service we're selling.

So far, all you've been
selling is yourself.

Can I have the name of
the man in charge, please?

Well, our director
is Biff Anderson,

but I don't think
he's around right now.

That name sounds familiar.
He lives in my building, I think.

Maybe I know him. What does he look like?
No, you don't know him.

Now, why don't we just come
right over here and, uh,

I'll just roll tape,

and we'll get you out of here
as quickly as we can.

Where were you born, Pam? Tell me
a little bit about your background.

Uh, I was born
in Minneapolis.

My parents still live there,
and, uh,

my dad is
in the hardware business.

Hi, Miss Vanderland.

I'd like to be your
personal tour guide...

through this experience
in social science.

Do you sail, Erica?

Welcome to the International
Circus Spectacular.

You will be in the main tent,
shot from a cannon at the end of show.

- Thank you.
- You can take Uri's tent. He's gone. No come back.

How do you know that?
How can you be so sure?

Is feeling, that's all.

Everybody's lips are sealed

Everybody's hands are tied

Everybody's got a secret

To hide

You know that everybody wears a smile

Everybody paints one on

Soon as you turn around

It's gone

So ask me no questions
I'll tell you no lies

And that's the way the world goes round

Zip your mouth up Cover your eyes

You better not make a sound

Everybody's lips are sealed

Everybody's hands are tied

Everybody's got a secret

To hide

- Hi!
- How are you doin'?

I hear you've been asking
questions about Uri Yovanovitch.

Yes.
He was a friend of mine.

You should not ask. If you want to live
long in this circus, you forget about Uri.

Why? What's going on?

You remember what I say.

You forget him.

Boy, we got him there,
didn't we?

I don't know what's
going on here, Ralph.

You know, somebody did try
to, uh, kill me, you know.

Now a little dwarf pops out of the
woodwork and warns you off the case?

I mean, I love it.
Don't you? A dwarf?

It was a little green guy,
was it?

Just kidding.

- He wasn't green, was he?
- No. Black.

Well. Anyway, then somebody remembered
me from the top of the high-rise,

saw me here, put it
together, panicked...

and decided to punch a hole
in my ticket with the tiger.

Try this for a scenario. The circus is
filled with international personalities.

We've got acts here from, uh, Poland,
Czechoslovakia, Romania, Bulgaria.

All over the place.
Nice international flavor.

International,
as in commie pinko.

Now, suppose one of these acts is doing
a little espionage here for the reds,

on a nationwide U.S. tour.

At a dating service, Bill? Come on.
Circus people aren't political.

Ralph, you're talking to a guy that
almost got turned into a tiger burger.

As far as the dating service goes,
we don't know how that figures in.

It could be a cover
for something else.

Speaking about fronts, I was thinking, the
circus wouldn't be a bad place for us to be.

We could travel all around the world,
solving cases in Spain, in Belgium,

in the United States,

and we could live
in the circus.

What about that class
you're so goofy about?

You're not gonna let them trash the
entire public school system by themselves.

Well, you know, I don't think I'm
doing them all that much good.

- That sounds like quitter talk.
- Sounds like realistic talk.

I don't wanna hear any more talk
about you deserting these kids.

You like them?

Ralph, I'm the number two federal
officer in all of Los Angeles.

And if we crack this clown caper,

I'm gonna be number one.

Now, come on. Let's get this act
out here and get it on the road.

Right. All righty.

Forgot this. Whew!

Bill, I don't know how you do it.
If it was me, I'd quit.

Oh! What, and give up
show business?

Ugh.

If Uri had not figured us out,
we would not have killed him,

and these two
would not be here.

They must be eliminated,
and we must do it quickly.

Mr. Hinkley!

What are you guys
doing here?

Far out with the red cape and
the red underwear here, Mr. H.

Uh, yeah.
It's kind of silly, isn't it?

It needs a purple hat
and a Cadillac.

Well, they gave it to me.
I'm gonna be shot off in a cannon today.

What? Did you lose your whole
box of spaghetti or something?

- Running around in your underwear on this geek show.
- It isn't a geek show.

It's wonderful!
This is the circus.

It's the oldest form of
entertainment in the world.

- We heard you was here. Mr. Maxwell told us.
- He did, huh?

He said you was thinking about joining
the circus, 'cause we disappointed you.

- Yeah, 'cause we didn't do so good on those Iowa tests.
- Ohio tests.

So what is it? You trying to
make us feel bad or something?

I just... You know,
I've always loved the circus.

Quite frankly, the circus I've been working
in recently hasn't been doing much for me.

- He's talking about our class.
- That's us.

I care for you guys.
You're real treasures.

But, uh, you know, if it doesn't
work, it doesn't work.

Aw, come on, man.
We'll take the test over.

We all took a vote on it,
and, uh, we're gonna read it,

and we're gonna take it over
during Easter vacation.

- I mean, give us a second chance here.
- Yeah.

I mean, we don't want
to lose you, Mr. H.

And, uh, see, we can do the test
again, for you. I know we can.

Gotta do it for yourself, Rhonda.
You can't do it for me.

I'm not so sure
about that, Mr. H.

At first we'll do it for you
'cause we care about you,

and then after a while, when we're
used to it, we'll do it for ourselves.

Wow.
Check that out, huh?

She's right, you know.

Well, all right.

Hey, you're gonna stick
around and see me today?

- Hey, wouldn't miss it, Mr. H.
- Boom! Plop.

Yeah.

- See you inside.
- Sure is a dumb-looking suit you got there.

Shut up! Will you shut up!

Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to International
Circus Spectacular!

And for your pleasure,
a cavalcade of circus stars!

Directing your attention
to the first ring...

Alice the Elephant and
the beautiful Alicia!

Boy, there's an elephant.

The circus, huh, Pam?

Oh, my, yes.
This sure is a circus.

It sure is, huh? Yes, the circus.

I love the circus.

On your matchmaker form,
it said you liked sailing.

I've got a boat
down at the marina, Pam,

and I thought maybe Saturday, if you're
not doing anything, I could, uh...

Well, Chuck,
I'm trying a case,

and Saturday is my day
in the law library.

It is, huh? Uh-huh.

Yeah, sure, it is.

And now Alicia will have
Alice the Elephant...

sit on her favorite chair.

Let's hear a round of applause
for the beautiful Alicia...

and Alice the Elephant! Boy,
there's an elephant. Look at that, Pam.

Is that an elephant
or is that an elephant?

Oh, no.

Or "oh, yes," depending
on what you're looking at.

Right, Pam? Uh, excuse me, Chuck.

Counselor, where are you off to?

Bill! That girl with Ralph. She was up in the
offices of Two On A Match this afternoon.

She don't look like
she needs a dating service.

Neither do I, thank you, but I'm sitting
up there with Chuck Chuckles all the same.

What's happening? You were supposed
to finish casing that job by noon.

I was in court all afternoon, and then
I got the call from my first date.

I didn't know how far you wanted me
to take the cover, so I made the date.

Well, good for you.
That shows initiative. I like that.

The Vanderlands!

We've gotta warn Ralph.
I'll take care of that.

You get anything else? Yeah, Biff Anderson.

He's the director. He's got his name
on the letterhead and everything.

Okay. Great. That's great.
Anything else?

Well, it's, uh,
just an impression,

but the guy
that operates the joint?

He seemed bored to death, then when I
came in they all started hitting on me.

It just didn't seem
professional, that's all.

Could be a cover for something else.
You don't think they burned you?

These guys at
this mix-and-match joint,

this geek you're with.

He's not a watchdog, is he?
Not in a million years. Trust me.

He let me get up and walk away.
If he was a watchdog, he wouldn't let me.

- There you are, Pamela!
- Probably not.

Uh, Bill Maxwell,
I'd like you to meet Charles Fisher.

Nice to know you, Bill!
Well, same here, Charles.

You enjoying
the circus? Yeah!

Well, Chuck,
you from around here? Sure are, Bill.

I think I detect a little
New Jersey accent in there.

It used to be.
I live in the marina now.

You're kidding! Really? What street?
Because... What street?

Ocean. Ocean! Yeah, but there's
no apartments on Ocean.

No houses. Yeah? Says who?

Well, uh, uh, me.

Get his gun.

Okay. Okay.
Hold it right there, baby.

Oh, not Charles Fisher
at all.

Kenny Givers.
Hi, Kenny.

Okay, one shot, Kenny. What's going
on down at the dating service?

He's some kind of pro.

We'll get his game stats
when we book him.

You're just gonna
leave him like that?

He's not gonna go anywhere
until they tear down the stands.

I think this thing is starting to gather
momentum. You get back in your seat.

The Flying Vanderlands!

That's Abigail!

And now,
in the center ring,

Mr. Ralph Hinkley,

the human cannonball,

will be shot out of a cannon
without the aid of a safety net!

This is Mr. Hinkley's debut...

with International Circus Spectacular!

Are you ready, Mr. Hinkley?

This is nuts. You gotta be
out of your mind to do this.

Let's go.

Fire the cannon!

Ralph, come in.
Are you okay?

What was that?

What happened? I think they spiked
your cannon, kid.

They're takin' off.
I'll follow them and talk you in.

Oh, is this your car?
I'm sorry.

I was just gonna
leave you a note.

She is trained to sit
on a red pedestal.

I was leading her out,
and she saw it and just sat on it.

Ta-da!

They're getting away,
and an elephant sits on my car?

What am I gonna
tell Carlisle?

Bill, you're supposed to talk
me in. C'mon!

Well, I'm doing the best I can
here Ralph.

Bill. Davidson,
where's your car?

- I came with Chuck.
- Uh... Villicana.

Hey, what happened to Mr. H.,
going through the tent like that?

He's okay. Just scratches. He landed in a pile
of hay and drove himself to the hospital.

Villicana,
I gotta have your car. Get outta here!

Do it, Tony. Come on. Where is it?
It's right over there.

Come on, honey. Hey, be careful
with that ride!

Don't worry about us.
We'll be fine.

Bill, I'm waiting.

Look, kid. I don't know.
I lost them. They're headed...

I don't know where
they're going. This is really great, Bill.

It all started
at Two On A Match.

Let's take a chance, and I'll meet you
there. East corner of Sixth and Olive.

Get Anderson
out of there.

Come on, Biff.
Let's go.

Uh, Bill, I think I'm on the
corner of Sixth and Olive.

Look around. See if you can spot a van.
Dark color. Black, maybe.

Yeah, there's one down here at
the west corner of the building.

I've got him spotted, Bill.

Go get him, kid.

Okay, you stay here. Nothing doing.

At least I know
the floor plan up there.

Freeze, sucker. Heard you coming a
mile away. What's in the bag, kid?

That's him.
That's the guy that was kidnapped.

Biff? Aha! You want to tell
me what's going on here?

Because I gotta tell ya,
this is not a dating service. What is it?

Maxwell, you're in for a
big commendation for this.

This is a C.I.A. Records
Center and Debriefing Drop.

Agents from all over the world
come here to debrief on tape.

And this... this is
the entire C.I.A. network,

worldwide.

Every undercover agent we've
placed in the last 20 years.

- Where's Uri?
- He's dead.

They killed him when Uri found
out what they were up to.

And who are you,
young man?

I'm, uh... He's with the circus.

You got any trouble
with that, Biff?

No. No, no.
No problem at all.

Look at these scores!
I can't believe these scores!

Cyler got an 88
in Comprehension.

Rhonda got a 90...
A 90 in Lit!

And look at this one. I love it when you
get excited like this.

Hey, back off, baby.
You know what I mean?

I get so excited when I see these scores.
It makes me feel proud to be a teacher.

Even better than being
shot out of a cannon?

Well, I wouldn't go that far,
but, uh, pretty close.

That sounds like an
open-the-door-in-the-name-of-the-law knock.

- Come in, Bill!
- Boy, wait'll you see this! You gotta see this!

- Hey, Bill, look at this! Look at these scores!
- You gotta see this.

Look at this sheet here.
Rap sheet.

- Hello. Pam, for you.
- Oh.

Okay, anyway, the point is this.

Carlisle is over at the office
steaming his own clams, he's so mad.

He gives me this rotten
little clown caper,

and I bust the biggest
worldwide ring... Hello? Yes.

Of international
information thieves ever!

These Vanderland guys were running
around... How did you find me here?

Busting security people in every
country where the circus played.

They were selling the info to Third
World countries. Commies, pinkos, reds.

They didn't care.
Now, get this.

I got a call
from the district director.

Agent of the month... Bill Maxwell.

I got the cover story
in Bust and Badgemagazine.

That's the F.B.I. newsletter.

I made the cover, Ralph.
The cover!

Did I tell you about these test results? The
kids knocked 'em dead in the makeup tests.

Aren't they incredible? I don't believe
this. You're not listening to me.

You don't make the cover
of Bust and Badgemagazine...

unless the brass upstairs knows that
you're a real stand-up, out-front guy.

I can't make a mistake! Carlisle couldn't
even nail me on the car that Alice sat on.

- Alice?
- Alice the Elephant.

Boy, that was one real mashed red Bug.

And that Charles Fisher,
a.k.a. Kenny Givers?

The guy that was her date at
the dating service? I was right.

A C.I.A. plant they dropped on her because she
was asking questions about Biff Anderson.

Anyway, that's the last we're
ever gonna hear of Kenny Givers.

I don't know, Kenny.
I'm kind of busy this weekend.

Yeah.

I'm not so sure
about that, Bill.

Every C.I.A. guy in town has
been calling Pam to get a date.

They saw the videotape she made, and being C.I.A.,
they can track her down anywhere, even here.

That's awful! Yes, it is awful!
It's terrible.

And you know about those feds. I mean,
they have that tenacious personality.

Okay, Ralph, why don't you
just take it easy.

Because all this is gonna just fade
away and disappear. I promise you.

Uh, bye.

Come in! Hi! Is Pam Davidson around?

What did you put
in those tapes?

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