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1
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:08,591
[knock on door]
2
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:11,594
[upbeat music]
3
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:17,892
♪ ♪
4
00:00:19,185 --> 00:00:21,813
- Uh, did you just get
a mysterious envelope
5
00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,898
and casually toss it aside
without even opening it?
6
00:00:23,982 --> 00:00:26,151
- Mm-hmm.
- Fuck, you're cool.
7
00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:27,610
- Okay, I already know
what's inside.
8
00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:29,279
It's my invite to
Kappa's pre-rush brunch
9
00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:31,531
later this afternoon.
- How can you be sure?
10
00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:35,034
- Because as a future Kappa,
I know how Kappas think.
11
00:00:35,118 --> 00:00:36,703
And I also might've
heard two girls
12
00:00:36,786 --> 00:00:39,038
in my Lit seminar talking
about the envelope color.
13
00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:40,498
"Mykonos sky blue."
14
00:00:40,582 --> 00:00:43,293
- Interesting.
I think of it as more of
15
00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:45,378
a "Sonic the Hedgehog" blue.
16
00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:48,298
- Wait, Kappa invited you, too?
- Sure did.
17
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:50,800
Got it last night. What?
Are you surprised?
18
00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:53,762
- Of course I'm surprised.
You wear sneakers with dresses.
19
00:00:53,845 --> 00:00:55,805
- Leighton, I'm gonna tell you
what I told Whitney.
20
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:57,974
That sororities
have a long history
21
00:00:58,057 --> 00:01:00,351
of exclusionary behavior
that promote
22
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:02,270
this kind of
woman-on-woman warfare.
23
00:01:02,353 --> 00:01:04,773
And that's why I will be
abstaining from Greek life.
24
00:01:04,856 --> 00:01:07,192
- Yeah, absolutely. Preach.
I'm totally on the same page.
25
00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:09,027
- Did you get an envelope?
- No, I did not.
26
00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:09,986
- Me neither.
27
00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:12,947
[upbeat music]
28
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:17,577
♪ ♪
29
00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:19,704
- Hey, can I give you
some unsolicited feedback
30
00:01:19,788 --> 00:01:21,247
on what you're wearing?
31
00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,124
- Oh, my God, of course.
I love when people do that.
32
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:26,628
- It's just Kappa is the most
exclusive sorority on campus.
33
00:01:26,711 --> 00:01:29,172
And this rush brunch
is your first opportunity
34
00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:30,715
to show them that you fit in.
35
00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:32,509
- Okay, so what's wrong
with what I'm wearing?
36
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:33,718
It's jeans and sneakers.
37
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:35,178
- And that is such
a cute outfit
38
00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:36,930
for, like, grocery shopping.
39
00:01:37,013 --> 00:01:39,140
I'm just saying there's still
time to run home and change.
40
00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:40,892
- Oh, my God.
Maybe you should change.
41
00:01:40,975 --> 00:01:42,352
I look good.
42
00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:44,020
You look like the perfume lady
at Bloomingdale's.
43
00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:45,980
- That is the meanest thing
you could've said to me.
44
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:48,316
- I just--I think
you're overthinking it.
45
00:01:48,399 --> 00:01:50,360
The invite said
to dress casual.
46
00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:53,738
[upbeat pop music]
47
00:01:53,822 --> 00:01:56,533
- This is what Kappa means
by casual.
48
00:01:56,616 --> 00:02:02,080
♪ ♪
49
00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:04,499
- Yeah, this is some "Get Out"
shit right here.
50
00:02:04,582 --> 00:02:08,336
- ♪ Turn up heat,
turn up fire ♪
51
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:12,340
♪ Turn up heat, turn up fire ♪
52
00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:14,717
- Hey, Mr. G,
I think you need to
53
00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:18,721
chugga chugga,
chugga chugga chill out.
54
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:21,558
[laughter]
55
00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:25,311
- That's so funny, right?
- I love that catchphrase.
56
00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:27,689
Chugga chugga chill out.
57
00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:30,525
- No, the sketch is about
how catchphrases are lame.
58
00:02:30,608 --> 00:02:32,151
No one would actually laugh
at someone saying
59
00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:35,572
chugga chugga chill out.
- [laughs]
60
00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:39,409
- Forget it. Look, this guy,
Danny Marawitz,
61
00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:42,203
he's a comedy legend.
He's also a "Catullan" alum,
62
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:44,080
and he's going to be at
this big alumni dinner
63
00:02:44,163 --> 00:02:45,081
they're throwing tonight.
64
00:02:45,164 --> 00:02:46,624
I want to chat him up
65
00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,418
and convince him
to be my mentor.
66
00:02:48,501 --> 00:02:50,962
- Oh, Bela, I'm sure he'd love
to be your mentor.
67
00:02:51,045 --> 00:02:52,380
You're the funniest person
I know.
68
00:02:52,463 --> 00:02:54,048
It's like I live
with Bugs Bunny.
69
00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:56,301
- I know you mean that
as a compliment, so thank you.
70
00:02:56,384 --> 00:02:57,927
Hey, wait, actually,
do you want to
71
00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,889
come with me as my plus one?
- Uh, yeah. I'd love to.
72
00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:02,265
- Okay, cool.
73
00:03:02,348 --> 00:03:03,808
- So if people like
this Danny guy are going,
74
00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,476
it's probably going to be
pretty fancy, right?
75
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:09,397
- [sighs] Fancy as shit.
- Oh, so like pantyhose fancy.
76
00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,983
- Kimberly, nothing
is ever pantyhose fancy.
77
00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:14,903
- Okay, well, I only brought
one dress with me to college.
78
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:17,030
- I'm sure it's fine.
Is it black?
79
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:19,949
- It's mustard.
80
00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:22,619
- Maybe we just go shopping.
81
00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,288
- ♪ Way too cool ♪
82
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:28,041
- Okay, fresh rosemary sprig
in my drink.
83
00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:29,459
I can get on board with this.
84
00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:30,793
- See? Kappa's living up
to the hype.
85
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,754
Oh, do you see
that blonde girl?
86
00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:34,631
[laughter]
- That's super creative.
87
00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:36,424
- There's like 15 blonde girls
over there.
88
00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:38,217
- Okay, first off,
half of them are bronde.
89
00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:40,762
No, I am talking about that
one right there, Quinn Cannon.
90
00:03:40,845 --> 00:03:42,347
She went to Spence.
She was like three years
91
00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:44,849
above me, and now
she's president of Kappa
92
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:47,268
and queen of the entire
Essex social scene.
93
00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:50,313
Quinn Cannon is exactly who
I want to be in three years.
94
00:03:50,396 --> 00:03:53,024
Okay, I am going to go mingle.
Are you good on your own?
95
00:03:53,107 --> 00:03:55,318
- I most definitely am not.
- You'll be fine.
96
00:03:55,401 --> 00:03:56,986
All right,
I can text you details
97
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,696
about who you're talking to,
if you need.
98
00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,531
I've done extensive research
on every single girl here.
99
00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:01,950
And if you need any help,
100
00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:03,868
just start talking
about celery juice.
101
00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:07,997
- ♪ Baby I am low like
everywhere I go I will ♪
102
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,917
- [laughs]
- Hey, you're Maura, right?
103
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:15,296
- Yeah. You must be
Nico's sister, Leighton.
104
00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:16,547
How you liking Essex?
105
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:18,383
- I've been busy
balancing schoolwork
106
00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:20,218
and extracurriculars
and finding ways
107
00:04:20,301 --> 00:04:22,095
to apply the knowledge
I gained last summer
108
00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:24,889
while interning for
Dahlia Lithwick at Slate.
109
00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:26,599
[chuckles]
- Wow.
110
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,851
I feel like I'm interviewing
you for a job.
111
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:32,230
Did you rehearse this?
- [laughs] No.
112
00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,191
- Wait, your name
is Ashley, too?
113
00:04:35,274 --> 00:04:36,484
I just met an Ashley.
114
00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:39,362
- Yeah, but I spell it
A-S-H-L-E-E.
115
00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:42,657
I know.
What were my parents smoking?
116
00:04:42,740 --> 00:04:44,701
[laughs]
117
00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:46,327
- Allie VanLandingham.
118
00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:48,871
You were the senior
social chair at Choate, right?
119
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:51,082
- Um, yeah.
How did you know that?
120
00:04:51,165 --> 00:04:52,959
- I mean there's only
three Choate Kappas.
121
00:04:53,042 --> 00:04:55,712
You, Madison, and Sheridan.
It's all on the website.
122
00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:57,422
- Stalker much?
123
00:04:57,505 --> 00:05:00,299
- It--it's public information.
124
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:04,220
- Yeah, but I spell it
A-S-H-L-E-I-G-H.
125
00:05:04,303 --> 00:05:06,639
- A-S-H-L-E-Y-E.
126
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:10,935
- I spell it A-S-H-L-I-E.
[laughs]
127
00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:12,687
- Do you like celery juice?
128
00:05:12,770 --> 00:05:14,230
- I have it
every single morning.
129
00:05:14,313 --> 00:05:16,190
- Oh, my God.
130
00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:19,110
- Kappa girls are we
and everywhere we are.
131
00:05:19,193 --> 00:05:22,113
We wear the sacred letters,
K-B-R.
132
00:05:22,196 --> 00:05:24,574
Go, Kappa Beta Rho!
- [sighs]
133
00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:27,076
Oh, my God, there's such good
stuff in the Kappa hashtag.
134
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:28,494
- Mm.
- Would it be crazy
135
00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:31,414
if we made one together?
- [laughs] Uh--
136
00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:32,957
Hey, sorry. I got to go.
137
00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:34,959
- Yeah, no, of course.
I'll see--I'll see you later.
138
00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:36,252
♪ ♪
139
00:05:36,335 --> 00:05:37,879
[laughter]
140
00:05:37,962 --> 00:05:39,922
- Your sneakers are so cool.
141
00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:42,050
- And you actually
play a varsity sport?
142
00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,301
That's so impressive.
143
00:05:43,384 --> 00:05:44,761
- Whitney,
what's your phone number?
144
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,888
We want to add you
to our Kappa memes chain.
145
00:05:46,971 --> 00:05:50,266
- This has been so great,
but I have a team bus to catch.
146
00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:53,019
It was nice meeting you,
and I look forward to
147
00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:55,480
seeing you all on
"Selling Sunset" one day.
148
00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:57,023
[laughter]
- She's so fun.
149
00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:58,399
- ♪ You only wish
you could be ♪
150
00:05:58,483 --> 00:05:59,901
- Oh, this one's so pretty.
151
00:05:59,984 --> 00:06:02,737
This looks like something
Shania Twain would wear.
152
00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:04,781
- Kimberly, no.
Please let me fix you.
153
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:06,491
I'm trying so hard.
- Okay.
154
00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:08,951
- So, have you met up
with hot-ass Nico
155
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:10,536
for any more French lessons
yet?
156
00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:12,830
- No. Not since he bailed
on me last time.
157
00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,207
I'm not sure it'll be
an ongoing thing.
158
00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:15,625
- But did you text him?
159
00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:17,335
- It's fine.
I don't want to bother him.
160
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:21,089
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
This is the dress.
161
00:06:21,172 --> 00:06:22,548
- [gasp]
- Fire emoji.
162
00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:24,634
Head exploding emoji.
Tongue hanging out emoji.
163
00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:27,011
You got to try this one out.
- This is beautiful.
164
00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:29,931
[gasp]
Oh, it's way too expensive.
165
00:06:30,014 --> 00:06:31,557
- Kimberly, if you don't wrap
your beautiful body
166
00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:33,184
in this dress, it will be
a slap in the face
167
00:06:33,267 --> 00:06:35,311
of hot feminists everywhere.
- I can't afford this.
168
00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:36,813
This will use up way too much
169
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:38,523
of my "for emergencies only"
credit card.
170
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:41,859
- So, just leave the tags on
and return it tomorrow.
171
00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:44,320
♪ ♪
172
00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:45,488
- ♪ I got style ♪
173
00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:48,324
- ♪ Hey, hey, hey yeah ♪
174
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:52,078
♪ I got my estimate
hey, hey, hey yeah ♪
175
00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:53,955
- Look at my big tits.
176
00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,166
- ♪ Hey, hey, hey, yeah ♪
177
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,127
- [laughs]
- Hey, over here.
178
00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:00,128
- Hey.
179
00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:03,506
♪ ♪
180
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:04,841
Hey, my God.
181
00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:06,676
- I am so excited to get
out of town with you.
182
00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:08,761
- Me too.
I kind of love hotels.
183
00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:10,429
- Aw, that's so cute
but you're not going to
184
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:11,764
like this one.
It's pretty gross.
185
00:07:11,848 --> 00:07:13,349
- Well, I'm sure
you'll like it more than
186
00:07:13,432 --> 00:07:15,101
crashing on your couch
for another night.
187
00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:17,186
It's got to be so weird
for you being around Michelle
188
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,646
since you told her
you're leaving her.
189
00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:20,189
- Let's not think
about that right now.
190
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,941
Let's just think about
all the hot hotel sex
191
00:07:22,024 --> 00:07:24,318
we'll be having tonight.
- Mm. [laughs]
192
00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:28,531
Okay, okay. Bus is ready.
We got to go.
193
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:30,449
And hide your boner.
Damn, bro.
194
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:32,493
- Wait, let me carry your bag
in front of it.
195
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:34,245
- Just tuck it up
behind your belt.
196
00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:36,038
♪ ♪
197
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,498
- Come on.
198
00:07:37,582 --> 00:07:41,252
- All right, everybody.
Let's get on the bus.
199
00:07:41,335 --> 00:07:45,882
- ♪ Keep me unavailable
keep me unavailable ♪
200
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:47,550
♪ More than I can tell
your friends ♪
201
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:49,051
- Leighton Murray.
202
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,387
We're you leaving
without even saying hi to me?
203
00:07:51,470 --> 00:07:52,805
- Oh, yeah, sorry. I just--
204
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:55,016
Well, I knew you were
really busy and I--
205
00:07:55,099 --> 00:07:56,976
I was really vibing
with the other girls. So--
206
00:07:57,059 --> 00:07:58,561
- Yeah, I saw.
207
00:07:58,644 --> 00:08:01,063
Look, everyone here
is equally obsessed with Kappa.
208
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:02,356
They're just better
at hiding it.
209
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:04,567
Let's go inside
and get a drink.
210
00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:07,904
So, you might major in math?
Wow.
211
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:10,489
- I know it's lame.
- No, it's refreshing.
212
00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:12,783
If I had to talk to another
fucking marketing major,
213
00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:14,911
I was going to rip my ears off.
- [laughs]
214
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,621
- Hey, do you Cory in Theta?
215
00:08:16,704 --> 00:08:19,999
- Uh, yeah.
Nico got Covid from him. Why?
216
00:08:20,082 --> 00:08:21,792
- Well, according to
my boyfriend,
217
00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:23,920
he has a huge crush on you.
218
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:27,465
- Yes, I have heard that.
- Would you be into him?
219
00:08:27,548 --> 00:08:29,800
- Yeah, no, 100%.
He's--he's so cute.
220
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:31,135
- I knew it.
221
00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:33,387
I'm texting him right now
that you like him.
222
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:35,264
- ♪ I love it, I love it ♪
223
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:38,100
♪ I can feel it in my heart ♪
224
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,560
♪ I love it, I love it ♪
225
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,562
♪ Talk to me, talk to me ♪
226
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,898
♪ I am here.
I love it, I love it ♪
227
00:08:43,981 --> 00:08:45,650
♪ Ready for your love ♪
- What's up?
228
00:08:45,733 --> 00:08:47,276
- Once we get to the hotel
you're gonna want to eat
229
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,694
some crackers or something,
230
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:50,112
'cause the team's
going out hard tonight.
231
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:51,697
- But don't we
have a game tomorrow?
232
00:08:51,781 --> 00:08:54,784
- It's fine. The team
we're playing is awful.
233
00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:56,327
I'm telling you,
234
00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:58,996
tonight's the best team bonding
night of the year.
235
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,623
You're gonna love it.
236
00:09:01,415 --> 00:09:03,084
- All right, ladies.
I need to speak with you.
237
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:05,461
So, all eyes on me.
- Way ahead of you, handsome.
238
00:09:05,544 --> 00:09:07,255
[laughter]
239
00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:08,798
- Coach Woods and I know
that there was a lot
240
00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:10,758
of sneaking out
last year after curfew.
241
00:09:10,841 --> 00:09:12,134
And I just want to
make it clear that
242
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:13,594
that's not gonna
happen again, okay?
243
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:15,471
- I have a question.
- Okay, what is it?
244
00:09:15,554 --> 00:09:18,474
- How'd you get so fine?
[laughter]
245
00:09:18,557 --> 00:09:19,767
- Okay, I get it.
246
00:09:19,850 --> 00:09:21,310
There's some weird jokes
among you girls
247
00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:23,646
that I'm, like,
attractive or whatever,
248
00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:28,109
but I am your coach,
and I deserve respect. Okay?
249
00:09:28,192 --> 00:09:29,485
All right, so when we
get to the hotel--
250
00:09:29,568 --> 00:09:30,987
- Take your shirt off!
[laughter]
251
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:32,655
- No, I'm not going
to take my shirt off.
252
00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:34,824
And you can't
talk to me like that, okay?
253
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:37,827
- Okay, Daddy.
- No, do not call me Daddy.
254
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:40,162
I'm not your sexy Daddy.
[laughter]
255
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,873
- Put me to bed, Daddy.
- Oh, come on.
256
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:44,083
[laughter]
257
00:09:44,166 --> 00:09:46,335
♪ ♪
258
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,879
- ♪ Movin' I can see that ♪
259
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,548
♪ I can see that ♪
260
00:09:50,631 --> 00:09:52,174
- Oh, man. So many "Catullan"
alums showed up.
261
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,093
- Oh, my gosh there's
a helium balloon arch.
262
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:55,386
I've always wanted
to walk under one.
263
00:09:55,469 --> 00:09:57,138
- Me too.
- Can you take a picture
264
00:09:57,221 --> 00:09:58,848
of me with it?
- Yeah, sure.
265
00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:02,018
- ♪ Movin' I can't see it ♪
266
00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:04,186
Yes, girl. Yes.
[camera clicks]
267
00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:07,189
So hot. Oh, my God,
you look so fucking hot.
268
00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:10,276
[jazz music]
269
00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:12,320
♪ ♪
270
00:10:12,403 --> 00:10:14,363
[gasp]
271
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:20,745
♪ ♪
272
00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:23,372
Hey, uh, so that's Ryan,
the nice editor.
273
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:25,374
And that's Eric,
the mean editor.
274
00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:27,293
Oh, and that's Peter Cook,
class of '84.
275
00:10:27,376 --> 00:10:28,919
He wrote like all of
Greg's funny lines
276
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,588
on "Dharma and Greg,"
just in case you talk to him
277
00:10:30,671 --> 00:10:33,049
and that comes up.
- He's good at Greg, got it.
278
00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:35,343
Oh, hey, isn't that
the chugga chugga guy?
279
00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:36,677
- Yeah.
280
00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:39,889
Hey, do you mind mingling with
the other plus ones for a bit?
281
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,599
I'm going to go talk to him
282
00:10:41,682 --> 00:10:43,267
and I don't want you watching
as I make love to his ego.
283
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:44,685
- Of course,
don't worry about me.
284
00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:46,937
I'm gonna hobnob
like it's my hob job.
285
00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:49,857
- Yeah, please don't.
- I won't try to be funny.
286
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:51,150
I'll just, like,
talk to old ladies
287
00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:52,735
about recent "Jeopardy!"
episodes.
288
00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:54,236
- Perfect. Okay.
289
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,738
[sighs]
290
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:58,741
♪ ♪
291
00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:00,534
- Oh, thank you.
292
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:05,831
♪ ♪
293
00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:09,126
Lila, Canaan.
Hey, how are you guys?
294
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:11,962
- Uh, Kimberly?
- How cool is this?
295
00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:13,631
Have you guys seen
the seafood tower?
296
00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:18,427
It has three tiers.
- Wait, so you're a guest here?
297
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:21,097
And we're, like, serving you?
- Yeah, that's weird.
298
00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,599
- Oh, no, no.
I'm barely a guest.
299
00:11:23,682 --> 00:11:25,017
I'm my roommate's plus one,
300
00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,644
and I'm just here
on a technicality.
301
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,021
Those look good.
302
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:32,233
- Would you like
one of my coconut shrimp?
303
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:36,153
- I'm good.
I just had something.
304
00:11:36,237 --> 00:11:40,866
- And do you want to put your
little stick on my trash tray?
305
00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:45,287
- No. I'm going to
hold on to it for a bit.
306
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,623
- I'm gonna take a lap.
307
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:57,258
♪ ♪
308
00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:02,430
- Excuse me,
you're Danny Marawitz, right?
309
00:12:02,513 --> 00:12:04,306
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm Bela Malhotra.
310
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,058
I'm a "Catullan" hopeful.
311
00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:07,476
- I'm jealous.
312
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,936
I'm just here
admiring pictures of myself
313
00:12:09,019 --> 00:12:11,313
without a receding hairline.
- [laughs]
314
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:12,648
Well, if it's more hair
you want,
315
00:12:12,731 --> 00:12:14,316
I waxed my arms this morning.
316
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,110
So there's basically
an Elvis wig in my garbage can.
317
00:12:16,193 --> 00:12:17,403
I'm sorry, that was gross.
318
00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:18,571
I'm just nervous
to talk to you.
319
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:20,614
- [laughs] That's really funny.
320
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:24,577
What's your name again?
- Uh, Bela Malhotra.
321
00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:26,120
- Well, good luck, Bela.
322
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:30,166
Gentlemen, don't hit
me up for money please.
323
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:31,542
- [soft laugh]
324
00:12:40,759 --> 00:12:41,927
- Leighton?
325
00:12:43,512 --> 00:12:45,473
Did you buy a chair?
326
00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:48,142
- Yes. If I'm going to be here
for 100 hours,
327
00:12:48,225 --> 00:12:51,020
I'm not spending them on
a couch that's older than I am.
328
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:53,731
- Oh, my God,
you know, you can't--
329
00:12:53,814 --> 00:12:55,566
- And before you jump
on my dick,
330
00:12:55,649 --> 00:12:58,277
my shift is over in ten minutes
and I've done a bunch of work.
331
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,529
I restocked the tampons
in the bathroom.
332
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:02,364
I restocked the tampons
in the couch room.
333
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,366
And I even gave
a girl a pamphlet
334
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:06,660
on the prison
industrial complex.
335
00:13:06,744 --> 00:13:08,913
- Okay, um, if you want
to shave off some hours,
336
00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:10,372
I could really
use your help tonight.
337
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:13,334
It's a panel on
the ABCs of the LGBTs.
338
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:16,212
You'll hate it.
- Yeah, I can't.
339
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:18,589
I have a--I have a thing.
340
00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:21,425
- A date?
- Yes.
341
00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:24,553
- Ooh, this'll be so much fun.
Okay, let me guess your type.
342
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:27,556
His name, Gareth.
His dad, the "Monopoly" man.
343
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,725
And his hobbies,
they include sailing
344
00:13:29,808 --> 00:13:31,560
and benefiting from
generational wealth?
345
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,562
- You forgot
belittling waiters, but yes.
346
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:34,980
Otherwise, that's about right.
347
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:36,732
- Well, that sounds like
my personal nightmare.
348
00:13:36,815 --> 00:13:38,609
- Mm.
- Condoms on your way out
349
00:13:38,692 --> 00:13:40,611
if you want them.
- Yeah, no thank you.
350
00:13:40,694 --> 00:13:42,279
I do not hook up
on the first date.
351
00:13:42,363 --> 00:13:44,448
- Whatever you say.
352
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:50,412
♪ ♪
353
00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:52,373
- Hey.
- Hey.
354
00:13:52,456 --> 00:13:54,333
- I know I was
being weird before,
355
00:13:54,416 --> 00:13:57,211
but that was
because of something else.
356
00:13:57,294 --> 00:14:00,130
And I'd love a Sprite, please.
- Okay, sure.
357
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:01,924
One Sprite.
358
00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:04,260
♪ ♪
359
00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:05,928
What are you doing?
360
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:07,263
- Oh, sorry.
Is that not enough?
361
00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:08,514
Fine, here.
362
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:09,974
- What the hell
is wrong with you?
363
00:14:10,057 --> 00:14:11,183
It's a Sprite.
364
00:14:11,267 --> 00:14:13,018
- I'm sorry.
I don't know what to do.
365
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,020
- Don't worry about it.
Keep your money.
366
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:18,107
No one else here
is tipping anyway, so...
367
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:19,858
- Hold on, I have an idea.
368
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:23,946
Wow, a bartender
on full scholarship,
369
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:26,615
and he makes a mean martini!
370
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:29,159
Here is a 20.
371
00:14:30,077 --> 00:14:31,787
- What the hell?
- When people know
372
00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:34,123
we're on financial aid,
they tip more.
373
00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,958
- Okay, I get that
you're trying to help,
374
00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:37,585
but there's no way
that's going to work, so--
375
00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:39,712
- I'll take a martini.
- Hmm.
376
00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,882
- Coming right up.
377
00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:47,803
- And Kappa's basically
Theta's sister sorority, so--
378
00:14:47,886 --> 00:14:49,638
You know, it would be great
if Nico and me--
379
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:50,723
- Yeah.
380
00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:53,851
- [clears throat]
I'm sorry, am I boring you?
381
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:59,356
- Hey, I got to ask you,
what is this?
382
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,025
- What do you mean?
383
00:15:01,108 --> 00:15:03,319
- When I saw you this summer,
and then with your brother
384
00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,322
a couple weeks ago, you know,
you kind of seemed into me.
385
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:08,115
And then,
I don't know, whenever
386
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,825
I'd try to hit you up,
you ghost me.
387
00:15:09,908 --> 00:15:12,202
And then all of a sudden
you want to go to dinner?
388
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:14,288
Something just kind of
seems off with you.
389
00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:16,707
- I--I just got to school
like a month ago.
390
00:15:16,790 --> 00:15:18,834
I'm sorry I don't hit you up
to dry hump me every night.
391
00:15:18,917 --> 00:15:21,503
- Whoa, whoa, whoa,
that's not what I meant at all.
392
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:24,632
- No, I know. I'm sorry.
I just--I'm sorry.
393
00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:30,679
Look, Cory, I really like you.
394
00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:34,558
- Do you, Leighton?
'Cause sometimes I think--
395
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:45,486
- Should we go back
to your place?
396
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:46,987
I could talk
about Kappa some more.
397
00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:51,200
- I would love that.
398
00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:52,451
- It was great chatting
with you, too.
399
00:15:52,534 --> 00:15:53,535
- You as well.
- Thank you.
400
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,037
- My pleasure.
401
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,706
- Dude, I am networking
my hot little ass off.
402
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,249
[tapping]
403
00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:01,710
- Excuse me? Can I
have your attention please?
404
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,295
- Oh, that's Danny.
405
00:16:03,379 --> 00:16:05,798
I am gonna get in his eyeline
and laugh really hard.
406
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:11,053
- Uh, my time at "The Catullan"
changed my life.
407
00:16:11,136 --> 00:16:13,722
And I've spent the last 20
years trying to change it back.
408
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,099
- [laughs]
409
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:17,142
- But seriously,
there is no better place
410
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:18,394
to launch a comedy career.
411
00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:19,978
With the skills
you'll learn here
412
00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:21,522
and the connections
you'll make,
413
00:16:21,605 --> 00:16:23,732
soon you'll be working
in writer's rooms with
414
00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:26,485
other funny guys and their
marginally funny girlfriends
415
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:29,029
they've hired through nepotism.
[laughter]
416
00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:31,073
But jokes aside,
417
00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:34,702
I think it's great that there
are some female writers now.
418
00:16:34,785 --> 00:16:36,578
Like this girl right here.
419
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:38,247
I had the chance
to chat with her earlier,
420
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:40,416
and I honestly think
that people like her
421
00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:43,252
are the future of comedy.
[applause]
422
00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:45,421
A young Indian woman?
423
00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:46,755
Soon she'll be
the only one of us
424
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,257
who can sell a television show.
425
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:50,718
Let me guess,
about a quirky ethnic woman
426
00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:53,053
trying to balance
her love life and her career.
427
00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,763
Yeah, that's compelling.
428
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,724
[laughter and murmurs]
429
00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:58,434
[muffled music]
430
00:16:58,517 --> 00:17:00,394
[loud dance music]
431
00:17:00,477 --> 00:17:02,479
- Hey, hey.
- You want? Oh, shoot.
432
00:17:02,563 --> 00:17:04,106
♪ ♪
433
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:06,108
- Wait, wait you need one.
You need one.
434
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:07,025
Go, go.
435
00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:10,237
[screaming and laughing]
436
00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:11,947
- Okay, okay,
where are we going?
437
00:17:12,030 --> 00:17:13,282
- A mini-golf course
that shares
438
00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:15,117
a parking lot with
a McDonald's.
439
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,745
- God damn,
that sounds amazing.
440
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:22,624
♪ ♪
441
00:17:22,708 --> 00:17:25,294
- Okay. Thank you.
442
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:29,506
♪ ♪
443
00:17:29,590 --> 00:17:33,010
[screaming]
444
00:17:33,093 --> 00:17:35,053
- Hump that dino.
- Yo, babe.
445
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:36,597
Yeah, baby.
- Yeah, I got it.
446
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:40,142
- This is 1000% going
on my Tinder profile.
447
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:41,477
- Okay, look.
448
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,686
- Okay, it's lit.
- Uh-huh.
449
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:44,313
- Okay, all right.
- Thank you.
450
00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:47,149
- What was that?
- What? Nothing.
451
00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:49,860
- Oh, shit.
452
00:17:51,445 --> 00:17:53,530
You're hooking up
with Coach Dalton.
453
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:58,285
[jazz music]
454
00:17:58,368 --> 00:18:00,996
- He may have hilarious
catchphrases,
455
00:18:01,079 --> 00:18:02,539
but that guy was such a jerk.
456
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,875
I really hated
everything he said.
457
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,711
- Hey, thanks
for being a good sport.
458
00:18:07,795 --> 00:18:09,338
Anything for the laugh, right?
459
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,341
- You're an asshole.
460
00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:15,594
- [laughs]
Easy, honey. Don't get upset.
461
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:17,137
I promise you,
it's not a good look.
462
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:18,430
- I used to look up to you,
463
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:19,932
but now
I don't even remember why.
464
00:18:20,015 --> 00:18:21,850
You haven't worked in,
like, ten years
465
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,352
and you know why?
466
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:24,853
Because you're not funny
anymore.
467
00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:27,397
You're like toxic podcast
funny, at best.
468
00:18:27,481 --> 00:18:30,567
So, chugga chugga,
chugga chugga eat shit.
469
00:18:33,111 --> 00:18:34,738
- You can forget about
my donation check.
470
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:38,033
- Wait, w--what are you--wait.
Hey, Danny, wait.
471
00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:40,536
I think it's crazy you
haven't worked in ten years.
472
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:43,664
- [laughs] You don't need
his money anyway, right?
473
00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:47,668
[sighs]
474
00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,254
[laughter]
- I have so many questions.
475
00:18:50,337 --> 00:18:51,547
When did this start?
476
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,048
Is he as good at sex
as he looks?
477
00:18:53,131 --> 00:18:54,758
And bitch are you crazy?
Answer the sex one first.
478
00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:56,510
- I know. I know it's insane.
Okay?
479
00:18:56,593 --> 00:19:00,055
But I can't help myself.
I--I think I, like, love him.
480
00:19:00,138 --> 00:19:01,807
- You love him?
- Willow.
481
00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:03,892
Please keep your voice down.
Okay, no one can find out.
482
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:05,769
- This whole team
is full of secrets,
483
00:19:05,853 --> 00:19:07,062
and I never share them.
484
00:19:07,145 --> 00:19:08,856
Last spring,
Jena ran over a dog.
485
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:11,149
- You just shared one.
Willow, please.
486
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:12,818
Okay, this could
ruin Dalton's career.
487
00:19:12,901 --> 00:19:14,153
And with my mom
being a senator,
488
00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:15,487
it would be
this whole big thing.
489
00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:16,905
Okay, you really
can't say anything.
490
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:19,241
- Say anything about what?
- Hey, Jena.
491
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:21,493
Uh, Willow and I
are actually in the middle
492
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:23,370
of an important,
private conversation.
493
00:19:23,453 --> 00:19:25,163
- About what?
- News and current events.
494
00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:26,832
What the fuck do you care?
Go ahead, go.
495
00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:28,333
- Okay, chill. Geez.
496
00:19:29,918 --> 00:19:31,336
- Can we just get out of here?
497
00:19:31,420 --> 00:19:33,005
- Can we stop at the McDonalds
on the way home?
498
00:19:33,088 --> 00:19:34,214
- Yes.
- All right.
499
00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:38,760
- Well, they're definitely
fucking.
500
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:41,597
- ♪ I'm a little late ♪
501
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,099
♪ Ah ah ♪
502
00:19:44,182 --> 00:19:47,185
♪ Get you water
for the wait ♪
503
00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:49,980
♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪
504
00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:51,815
♪ Doubling the pace...♪
505
00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:53,442
- You down?
506
00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:54,902
- Yeah, I'm fine.
507
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,528
- ♪ I skinny-dipped
and did it ♪
508
00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:57,821
♪ I should've known better ♪
509
00:19:57,905 --> 00:19:59,615
♪ But I didn't overthink it ♪
510
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,533
♪ And I probably would've
floated but I sank it ♪
511
00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:03,410
♪ Took a dive
in the deep end ♪
512
00:20:03,493 --> 00:20:05,162
♪ Forgot to move ♪
513
00:20:05,245 --> 00:20:07,998
♪ Swam with the fish
till my kiss turned blue ♪
514
00:20:08,081 --> 00:20:10,751
♪ I aired out my sheets
'cause they smell like you ♪
515
00:20:10,834 --> 00:20:12,920
♪ I cleaned out the salt
in my wounds ♪
516
00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:15,672
♪ And I'm a little late ♪
517
00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:18,300
♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪
518
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:22,262
♪ Get you water for the wait ♪
519
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:25,474
- Bela, I--I really think
you overreacted.
520
00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:26,808
Danny can't be sexist.
521
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:28,727
He only hires
female assistants.
522
00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:30,687
- She's right.
I told him my name,
523
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:32,564
and he said
he'd just call me Ali Wong.
524
00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:33,982
- [groans]
- He's rude,
525
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,401
and I'm glad
Bela said something.
526
00:20:38,820 --> 00:20:39,905
- It'll be okay.
527
00:20:41,698 --> 00:20:44,117
- Maybe we should just go.
- I'll go get our coats.
528
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:48,747
- Bela, right?
The roast master herself.
529
00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,166
- Yeah, now might not
be the time.
530
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,335
- I overheard
what you said to Danny.
531
00:20:53,418 --> 00:20:55,963
And I want to thank you.
532
00:20:56,964 --> 00:20:59,716
Danny Marawitz is and always
has been a total shit.
533
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,802
He and I were tapped
in the same year,
534
00:21:01,885 --> 00:21:04,012
and his favorite "joke"
was to call me gay.
535
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:07,182
And I am gay, so--that sucked.
536
00:21:07,265 --> 00:21:08,684
He made "The Catullan"
a living hell
537
00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:10,477
for everyone on staff
for four years.
538
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,188
But until tonight, I've never
seen anyone go back at him.
539
00:21:14,189 --> 00:21:17,359
I'd be happy to write a check
to replace his donation.
540
00:21:17,442 --> 00:21:19,194
- He said he was donating
20 grand.
541
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:22,197
- I'd be happy to write a check
to replace half his donation.
542
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,366
- Thank you so much.
543
00:21:24,449 --> 00:21:25,325
- [laughs]
544
00:21:25,409 --> 00:21:27,619
♪ ♪
545
00:21:27,703 --> 00:21:28,870
- Thanks.
546
00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:30,205
♪ ♪
547
00:21:30,288 --> 00:21:31,832
- Hey, Kimberly.
548
00:21:31,915 --> 00:21:35,210
We wanted to give this to you.
It's all of your fake tips
549
00:21:35,293 --> 00:21:36,712
and then a cut of
everything else that we made.
550
00:21:36,795 --> 00:21:38,422
- What? No. I can't take that.
551
00:21:38,505 --> 00:21:41,591
- We thought it was only fair
and he was reluctant at first,
552
00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:43,260
but I convinced him.
553
00:21:43,343 --> 00:21:44,845
- It was definitely
the other way around.
554
00:21:44,928 --> 00:21:47,347
- That's a lie.
An impossible to prove lie.
555
00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,725
- It's really nice
of you guys but--
556
00:21:49,808 --> 00:21:51,268
- Oh, my God, just take it.
557
00:21:51,351 --> 00:21:53,186
It's like a real small
percentage of what we made.
558
00:21:53,270 --> 00:21:54,730
- Very small.
- We wouldn't have made
559
00:21:54,813 --> 00:21:56,690
anything without your help.
- Thanks.
560
00:21:56,773 --> 00:21:58,191
- You're welcome.
561
00:21:58,275 --> 00:21:59,735
- [clears throat]
- Oh, yes. Of course.
562
00:21:59,818 --> 00:22:02,612
- Oh, no, no.
That's not how this works.
563
00:22:02,696 --> 00:22:04,114
- Help does not tip help.
564
00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:09,578
- Willow, you swear
you won't tell anyone?
565
00:22:09,661 --> 00:22:12,289
- Whitney, I know this may be
tough for you to believe,
566
00:22:12,372 --> 00:22:14,082
given all the men's hoodies
I wear,
567
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:15,917
but I was closeted once.
I can keep a secret.
568
00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:17,419
- Okay.
569
00:22:17,502 --> 00:22:20,547
- Now, go have gross, straight
sex with our coach.
570
00:22:20,630 --> 00:22:23,842
And do not wake me up
when you get back.
571
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,137
- Okay. Hey.
- Hmm?
572
00:22:27,220 --> 00:22:28,930
- You're a good friend.
- [scoffs]
573
00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:32,350
- Drink water.
574
00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:36,146
[Claud's "Soft Spot" plays]
575
00:22:36,229 --> 00:22:43,320
♪ ♪
576
00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:52,037
- ♪ This sounds kind of
strange ♪
577
00:22:52,120 --> 00:22:55,332
♪ I thought I saw you
at a party ♪
578
00:22:55,415 --> 00:23:00,087
♪ But I finally got close
it wasn't you ♪
579
00:23:00,170 --> 00:23:01,505
- Hey.
580
00:23:01,588 --> 00:23:04,091
- I'm so sorry I'm late.
I feel terrible.
581
00:23:04,174 --> 00:23:06,551
We had plans and
I just lost track of time.
582
00:23:06,635 --> 00:23:08,261
- It's all good.
583
00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:10,639
Tonight I get to fall asleep
next to you for the first time.
584
00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:14,476
♪ ♪
585
00:23:14,559 --> 00:23:16,311
- Well don't fall asleep, yet.
586
00:23:16,394 --> 00:23:19,356
- ♪ But you're the one
I think about ♪
587
00:23:19,439 --> 00:23:24,194
♪ So now I don't know
what the hell to do ♪
588
00:23:24,277 --> 00:23:27,572
♪ 'Cause I've got ♪
589
00:23:27,656 --> 00:23:30,075
[phone rings]
♪ A soft spot ♪
590
00:23:30,158 --> 00:23:32,869
♪ I've got ♪
591
00:23:32,953 --> 00:23:36,456
♪ It for you ♪
592
00:23:36,540 --> 00:23:38,792
♪ ♪
593
00:23:38,875 --> 00:23:42,546
♪ It for you ♪
594
00:23:42,629 --> 00:23:45,674
♪ ♪
595
00:23:45,757 --> 00:23:49,427
♪ We used to lie in bed
and talk for hours ♪
596
00:23:49,511 --> 00:23:51,221
♪ About everything ♪
597
00:23:51,304 --> 00:23:56,852
♪ And anything you
said you wanted to ♪
598
00:23:56,935 --> 00:24:00,480
♪ Pull the covers over
our short hair ♪
599
00:24:00,564 --> 00:24:03,275
♪ Pretend like the city
wasn't there ♪
600
00:24:03,358 --> 00:24:06,862
♪ Like it was only
just us two ♪
601
00:24:06,945 --> 00:24:09,447
♪ ♪
602
00:24:09,531 --> 00:24:11,783
♪ You told me
that it's over now ♪
603
00:24:11,867 --> 00:24:14,995
♪ But I can't help
that I think about ♪
604
00:24:15,078 --> 00:24:20,041
♪ All the things
that we used to do ♪
605
00:24:20,125 --> 00:24:22,669
♪ 'Cause I've got ♪
606
00:24:22,752 --> 00:24:26,256
♪ A soft spot ♪
607
00:24:26,339 --> 00:24:28,633
♪ I've got ♪
608
00:24:28,717 --> 00:24:32,345
♪ It for you ♪
609
00:24:32,429 --> 00:24:34,556
♪ ♪
610
00:24:34,639 --> 00:24:38,185
♪ It for you ♪
611
00:24:38,268 --> 00:24:41,313
♪ ♪
612
00:24:41,396 --> 00:24:43,940
♪ I wish I left all
my things ♪
613
00:24:44,024 --> 00:24:47,277
♪ At your place
so I could come get them ♪
614
00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:49,905
♪ We do things
we might regret ♪
615
00:24:49,988 --> 00:24:53,074
♪ And say that we could
make exceptions ♪
616
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:56,077
♪ I just can't
take the rejection ♪
617
00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:59,206
♪ Maybe I'm just
second guessing ♪
618
00:24:59,289 --> 00:25:00,916
♪ ♪
619
00:25:00,999 --> 00:25:03,793
♪ 'Cause I've got ♪
620
00:25:03,877 --> 00:25:06,880
♪ A soft spot ♪
621
00:25:06,963 --> 00:25:09,716
♪ I've got ♪
622
00:25:09,799 --> 00:25:13,470
♪ It for you ♪
623
00:25:13,553 --> 00:25:15,472
♪ ♪
624
00:25:15,555 --> 00:25:19,184
♪ It for you ♪
625
00:25:19,267 --> 00:25:21,603
♪ ♪
626
00:25:21,686 --> 00:25:25,065
♪ It for you ♪
627
00:25:25,148 --> 00:25:27,359
♪ ♪
628
00:25:27,442 --> 00:25:30,403
♪ It for you ♪
629
00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:35,325
♪ ♪
630
00:25:38,536 --> 00:25:39,621
- Go to bed.
631
00:25:39,671 --> 00:25:44,221
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