Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,089 --> 00:00:03,829
ADULT SHELDON:
Engineering has a rich
2
00:00:03,873 --> 00:00:05,527
and storied history,
3
00:00:05,570 --> 00:00:08,182
dating back to ancient times.
4
00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:11,663
Some consider it the single most
important field of study...
5
00:00:11,707 --> 00:00:13,230
Okay, w-wha... no. Stop.
6
00:00:13,274 --> 00:00:15,145
I'm sorry.
Howard, I can't do this.
7
00:00:15,189 --> 00:00:17,191
WOLOWITZ:
You asked me to write you
an introduction to engineering.
8
00:00:17,234 --> 00:00:18,888
ADULT SHELDON:
Yes, and if I wanted
a comedy routine,
9
00:00:18,931 --> 00:00:20,498
I'd have gone to Billy Crystal.
10
00:00:20,542 --> 00:00:22,109
WOLOWITZ:
Just let me read it.
[clears throat]
11
00:00:22,152 --> 00:00:23,806
♪
12
00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:26,243
Engineering has a rich
and storied history
13
00:00:26,287 --> 00:00:28,680
dating back to ancient times.
14
00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:31,031
Some consider it the single
most important field of study
15
00:00:31,074 --> 00:00:32,728
known to man,
16
00:00:32,771 --> 00:00:35,861
from the wheel to the
International Space Station,
17
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:37,341
which I went to.
18
00:00:37,385 --> 00:00:39,082
ADULT SHELDON:
Honestly, this again?
19
00:00:39,126 --> 00:00:40,562
WOLOWITZ:
Like we don't hear
about your Nobel Prize
20
00:00:40,605 --> 00:00:42,390
all the time.
21
00:00:42,433 --> 00:00:43,956
ADULT SHELDON:
It's not my fault
people ask about it.
22
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:46,089
WOLOWITZ:
Because you're always
wearing it!
23
00:00:46,133 --> 00:00:48,048
You have it on right now.
24
00:00:48,091 --> 00:00:49,745
ADULT SHELDON:
Look how shiny it is. [Wolowitz sighs]
25
00:00:49,788 --> 00:00:51,225
WOLOWITZ:
Just tell your story.
26
00:00:51,268 --> 00:00:53,749
ADULT SHELDON:
My own history with engineering
27
00:00:53,792 --> 00:00:57,100
began spring semester
of my freshman year.
28
00:00:57,144 --> 00:00:58,275
Good morning.
29
00:00:58,319 --> 00:01:00,669
I'm Professor Boucher,
30
00:01:00,712 --> 00:01:03,063
and this
is Civil Engineering Lab.
31
00:01:03,106 --> 00:01:06,501
Class begins at 0900,
which is...
32
00:01:07,458 --> 00:01:09,417
...now.
33
00:01:10,374 --> 00:01:12,028
In this course,
34
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,377
we're going to apply
the principles
35
00:01:13,421 --> 00:01:14,900
of static mechanical forces...
36
00:01:14,944 --> 00:01:16,163
[knocks on door]
37
00:01:16,206 --> 00:01:18,078
I'm in this class.
38
00:01:18,121 --> 00:01:20,167
This class started at 0900,
39
00:01:20,210 --> 00:01:24,127
so... no, you're not.
40
00:01:25,389 --> 00:01:26,956
As I was saying,
41
00:01:26,999 --> 00:01:28,523
Uh, yes?
42
00:01:28,566 --> 00:01:31,352
I appreciate your use
of the 24-four hour time format.
43
00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:33,876
Were you aware that while often
referred to as "military time,"
44
00:01:33,919 --> 00:01:35,965
it actually dates back
to the Egyptians?
45
00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:39,795
I'm aware that the class
is now starting at 0901.
46
00:01:39,838 --> 00:01:42,189
Is it all right with you
if I begin?
47
00:01:42,232 --> 00:01:44,147
Please.
48
00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:47,498
ADULT SHELDON: One minute in
and I was already his favorite.
49
00:01:47,542 --> 00:01:51,154
♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪
50
00:01:51,198 --> 00:01:53,852
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain
51
00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:56,551
♪ I bet I could be your hero
52
00:01:56,594 --> 00:01:59,206
♪ I am a mighty little man
53
00:01:59,249 --> 00:02:04,254
♪ I am a mighty little man.♪
54
00:02:05,821 --> 00:02:08,780
This course is about
practical applications.
55
00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:12,001
This isn't about fancy theories
or what works in a classroom.
56
00:02:12,044 --> 00:02:15,135
If a tunnel collapses, the
only math that's gonna matter
57
00:02:15,178 --> 00:02:16,875
is the body count.
58
00:02:19,008 --> 00:02:20,879
You.Sheldon Cooper.
59
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:23,186
Son, I'll learn your name
if you make it to midterms.
60
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:25,014
Right now,
you're just a number to me.
61
00:02:25,057 --> 00:02:26,624
Ooh, can I be number one?
62
00:02:26,668 --> 00:02:28,365
That's what Captain Picard
calls Commander Riker
63
00:02:28,409 --> 00:02:30,367
on Star Trek: Next Generation.
64
00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:34,197
You need to listen more
and talk less.
65
00:02:34,241 --> 00:02:36,721
Is that clear, number one?
66
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:39,202
Aye, Captain.
67
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:40,551
Hmm.
68
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:42,901
[phone rings]
69
00:02:44,512 --> 00:02:45,469
Ballard's.
70
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:46,688
Hello.
71
00:02:46,731 --> 00:02:48,472
Hey, what's up?Oh, nothing.
72
00:02:48,516 --> 00:02:51,301
I just called to say hello.Oh.
73
00:02:51,345 --> 00:02:53,999
Gee, I don't think I've done
that in my entire life.
74
00:02:54,043 --> 00:02:55,479
You want me to hang up?
75
00:02:55,523 --> 00:02:57,916
No. Uh-uh.
76
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,223
W... But what happens next?
77
00:03:00,267 --> 00:03:01,311
[phone beeps]Oh, wait, hang on.
78
00:03:01,355 --> 00:03:02,660
I got another call.
79
00:03:02,704 --> 00:03:04,488
All right, fine,
yeah, sure, I can w...
80
00:03:04,532 --> 00:03:05,837
Hello?
81
00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:07,404
JUNE: Hey, Connie. June.
82
00:03:07,448 --> 00:03:09,232
Hi, June. What's going on?
83
00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,191
I know you have a hair
appointment this afternoon,
84
00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:12,844
but I'm gonna have to cancel.
85
00:03:12,888 --> 00:03:14,237
Everything okay?
86
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:16,674
No, I busted my knee up
pretty good.
87
00:03:16,718 --> 00:03:18,676
Oh. Does Dale know?
88
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:21,026
I-I'm on the other line
with him.
89
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:23,246
No, not yet.
Yeah, you can tell him.
90
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:24,421
Okay, hang on.
91
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:25,640
Hello?
92
00:03:25,683 --> 00:03:27,337
I'm so sorry, who's this?
93
00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:28,425
It's been so long.
94
00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:30,471
I'm on the phone with June.
95
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:31,863
She hurt her knee.
96
00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:32,951
How?
97
00:03:32,995 --> 00:03:34,301
Well, hold on.
98
00:03:35,432 --> 00:03:36,738
How'd you hurt it?
99
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:38,348
Oh, it's so embarrassing.
100
00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:41,351
I slipped on a glob
of hair gel at the salon.
101
00:03:41,395 --> 00:03:43,223
Wait a minute.
102
00:03:43,266 --> 00:03:46,704
She slipped on a glob
of hair gel at the salon.
103
00:03:46,748 --> 00:03:49,054
[laughs]:
Oh, nice.
104
00:03:49,098 --> 00:03:50,926
Well, that was worth the wait.
105
00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:54,625
SHELDON:
And then, at exactly 9:00,
106
00:03:54,669 --> 00:03:57,062
he locked the doors and wouldn't
let any latecomers in.
107
00:03:57,106 --> 00:03:58,629
That seems a little harsh.
108
00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:00,457
He's so intolerant.
It's fantastic.
109
00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:03,112
He also wears a bow tie, and
instead of using my name,
110
00:04:03,155 --> 00:04:04,766
he gave me a number.
111
00:04:04,809 --> 00:04:06,376
I don't think
I like that, either.
112
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:07,812
No, it's great.
It's like we're robots.
113
00:04:07,856 --> 00:04:09,292
And guess what my number is.
114
00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:10,728
Number two?
115
00:04:10,772 --> 00:04:11,903
SHELDON:
No, number one,
116
00:04:11,947 --> 00:04:13,340
like Riker on Star Trek.
117
00:04:13,383 --> 00:04:15,820
But number two is also good.
Like the pencil.
118
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,257
MARY:Well,
119
00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:18,780
I'm glad you enjoyed your class.
120
00:04:18,823 --> 00:04:20,869
For our first assignment,
we get to build a bridge.
121
00:04:20,912 --> 00:04:23,480
Professor Boucher was part
of the Army Corps of Engineers,
122
00:04:23,524 --> 00:04:25,569
and he built bridges
all over the world.
123
00:04:25,613 --> 00:04:27,397
You know,
I was also in the Army.
124
00:04:27,441 --> 00:04:29,747
Ooh, perhaps you trudged
across one of his bridges.
125
00:04:29,791 --> 00:04:31,096
How neat would that be?
126
00:04:31,140 --> 00:04:33,142
I bet Dad did cool
Army stuff, too.
127
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:35,623
Nope. "Trudging" sums it up.
128
00:04:35,666 --> 00:04:37,625
See, number one
is also pretty funny,
129
00:04:37,668 --> 00:04:39,453
'cause it means taking a leak.
130
00:04:39,496 --> 00:04:40,802
[sighs]
131
00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,499
[doorbell rings][TV playing indistinctly]
132
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:44,022
Come in.[TV stops]
133
00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:46,416
If you're a robber,
I got a shotgun.
134
00:04:46,460 --> 00:04:48,679
It's Connie and Dale.
Don't shoot.
135
00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:49,680
[laughs]:
Oh.
136
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,856
Hey. Y'all didn't
have to come by.
137
00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,031
MEEMAW:
We just wanted to see
138
00:04:53,075 --> 00:04:54,468
how you're doing.
139
00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:56,557
Yeah. Brought your
favorite ice cream.
140
00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:57,775
Butter pecan?
141
00:04:58,515 --> 00:05:00,125
What's your second-favorite?
142
00:05:01,170 --> 00:05:03,694
I'll put this away.
143
00:05:03,738 --> 00:05:05,217
So, how's it going?
144
00:05:05,261 --> 00:05:06,567
Do you have anybody
to help you out?
145
00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:10,222
Oh, yeah. These little guys.
146
00:05:10,266 --> 00:05:11,920
Elvis was onto something.[chuckles]
147
00:05:11,963 --> 00:05:14,139
Till he keeled
over on the toilet.
148
00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:15,706
He was the king.
149
00:05:15,750 --> 00:05:18,230
That was his throne.[laughs]
150
00:05:18,274 --> 00:05:21,321
Seriously, now, though,
if you need anything at all,
151
00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:22,800
we are here for you.
152
00:05:22,844 --> 00:05:25,281
That's right. 100%.
153
00:05:26,282 --> 00:05:27,457
MEEMAW:
Would you stop?
154
00:05:27,501 --> 00:05:28,980
I was being sincere.
155
00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:31,722
Well, that's for the next
dumb thing you say.
156
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:33,071
Well, just quit
hitting me, would you?
157
00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:34,334
Well, quit being stupid.
158
00:05:36,379 --> 00:05:38,599
BOUCHER:
For your design assignment,
you may decide
159
00:05:38,642 --> 00:05:41,123
between suspension bridges,
truss bridges, beam bridges,
160
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,734
just not Beau Bridges.
161
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:50,088
And people say engineers
don't have a sense of humor.
162
00:05:50,132 --> 00:05:51,089
Yes?
163
00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:52,656
What are Beau Bridges?
164
00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:55,485
That's all for today.
165
00:05:55,529 --> 00:05:57,661
Your initial designs
are due next week.
166
00:05:57,705 --> 00:05:59,054
[students shuffling]
167
00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:02,753
I finished my design
assignment early.
168
00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:05,713
I admire that initiative.
169
00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:08,368
Thank you,
I stayed up late to finish it.
170
00:06:08,411 --> 00:06:10,718
My normal bedtime is 2100 hours,
171
00:06:10,761 --> 00:06:12,720
but I was so excited to do it
that I took a power nap
172
00:06:12,763 --> 00:06:15,026
in my Meemaw's back seat
on the drive home.
173
00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:17,725
Uh, you'll need
to do this again. It's wrong.
174
00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:21,468
No, it's not.
175
00:06:21,511 --> 00:06:24,862
Son, I'm giving you
another chance before it's due.
176
00:06:25,994 --> 00:06:27,822
Well, what's wrong with it?
177
00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:29,389
That's your job to figure out.
178
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:32,348
I would argue that
it's your job to teach me.
179
00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:38,659
Let's see.
[clears throat]
180
00:06:38,702 --> 00:06:42,184
To start,
this bridge is in pieces.
181
00:06:42,227 --> 00:06:43,707
What do you mean?
182
00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:51,672
Well, two can play at this game.
183
00:07:00,115 --> 00:07:01,421
Well, now they can't.
184
00:07:07,949 --> 00:07:10,560
And then he ripped up my paper
right in front of me.
185
00:07:10,604 --> 00:07:12,127
What is this man's problem?
186
00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:14,259
I don't know.
He didn't even use a ruler.
187
00:07:14,303 --> 00:07:16,131
He just ripped it up,
willy-nilly.
188
00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:17,872
Do you want me to
call the school?
189
00:07:17,915 --> 00:07:20,657
No, he was in the Army.
I want him to think I'm tough.
190
00:07:20,701 --> 00:07:22,485
Sure.
191
00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:26,184
Well, I'm sorry
you had a bad day.
192
00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:28,752
How about a little
trip to RadioShack?
193
00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:31,755
RadioShack's not gonna
make this better.
194
00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,888
It's also not gonna
make it worse, so okay.
195
00:07:33,931 --> 00:07:35,542
You got it.
196
00:07:35,585 --> 00:07:38,196
Maybe he was just intimidated
by my intelligence.
197
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,155
Or maybe he's an insecure bully
198
00:07:40,198 --> 00:07:42,766
taking out his frustrations
on a little boy.
199
00:07:42,810 --> 00:07:44,725
I like my version better
where I'm intimidating
200
00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:46,466
and not a helpless child.
201
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:50,774
Okay, he's taking out
his frustrations on a powerful
202
00:07:50,818 --> 00:07:53,211
and intimidating young man.
203
00:07:53,255 --> 00:07:55,126
That works.
204
00:07:55,170 --> 00:07:56,388
WOMAN [over TV]: Romeo,
205
00:07:56,432 --> 00:07:58,478
wherefore art thou, Romeo?
206
00:07:58,521 --> 00:07:59,957
Hey, baby.
207
00:08:00,001 --> 00:08:02,046
[TV playing indistinctly]
208
00:08:10,794 --> 00:08:12,796
[phone ringing]
209
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,145
Ballard's.
210
00:08:14,189 --> 00:08:16,321
It's me.
Any chance you could swing by?
211
00:08:16,365 --> 00:08:18,149
What do you need?
212
00:08:18,193 --> 00:08:19,629
Well, the recliner
won't go down,
213
00:08:19,673 --> 00:08:21,675
and I'm stuck in this chair
like a damn fool.
214
00:08:21,718 --> 00:08:23,981
Well, that is a situation.
215
00:08:24,025 --> 00:08:25,548
How long you been stuck?
216
00:08:25,592 --> 00:08:27,463
Are you gonna help me out
or not?
217
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,552
Oh, just give me
a moment to enjoy it.
218
00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:32,163
Get your ass over here and
you can laugh at me in person.
219
00:08:32,207 --> 00:08:34,122
Eh, I'm on my way.
220
00:08:34,165 --> 00:08:35,427
[exhales]
Thank you.
221
00:08:35,471 --> 00:08:36,864
Got to grab my camera.[hangs up]
222
00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:39,170
[sighs]
223
00:08:39,214 --> 00:08:41,825
ADULT SHELDON:
You know it's bleak
when even a trip to RadioShack
224
00:08:41,869 --> 00:08:43,827
couldn't lift my spirits.
225
00:08:43,871 --> 00:08:47,091
ANNOUNCER:
Professor Proton will be
right back after these messages.
226
00:08:47,135 --> 00:08:49,572
♪
227
00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:51,879
♪ You're reaching deep
inside you ♪
228
00:08:51,922 --> 00:08:54,534
Go!♪ For things
you've never known ♪
229
00:08:55,796 --> 00:08:58,276
♪ It's been tough, rough going
230
00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:01,105
♪ But you haven't gone alone
231
00:09:01,149 --> 00:09:04,718
♪ Be all that you can be...
232
00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:06,328
Of course.
233
00:09:06,371 --> 00:09:07,808
ADULT SHELDON:
I realized Professor Boucher
234
00:09:07,851 --> 00:09:10,724
was pushing me to be
the best me I could be.
235
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:13,074
You'd think the person
who could teach me
236
00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:15,380
to be the best me
I could be was me,
237
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:18,601
but it was Professor Boucher,
after the Army taught him
238
00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:20,603
to be the best he
that he could be.
239
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:22,213
Now it was up to me
240
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:25,303
to help us be the best
"we" we could be.
241
00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:28,872
I think you're going to like
this one, sir.
242
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:36,837
Do it again.
243
00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:38,534
Yes, sir, sir.
244
00:09:39,491 --> 00:09:41,363
Here you go.
245
00:09:41,406 --> 00:09:44,366
♪
246
00:09:44,409 --> 00:09:48,196
♪ But it was just another piece
of paper... ♪
247
00:09:48,239 --> 00:09:49,501
Again.
248
00:09:49,545 --> 00:09:51,416
Yes, sir, sir.
249
00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:54,376
♪ And it really didn't mean
one little thing ♪
250
00:09:54,419 --> 00:09:59,337
♪ To you from the very start
251
00:09:59,381 --> 00:10:02,514
♪ Just another
piece of paper... ♪
252
00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:05,779
Oh, at least use
a straight-edge.
253
00:10:05,822 --> 00:10:08,303
♪ Just another piece of paper
254
00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:11,132
♪ Tearing us apart
255
00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:16,746
♪ And it is
just another piece of paper... ♪
256
00:10:19,531 --> 00:10:21,533
You wanted to see me, ma'am?
257
00:10:21,577 --> 00:10:24,188
Hello, Professor Boucher.
Please, come in, have a seat.
258
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:25,929
I'd prefer to stand.
259
00:10:25,973 --> 00:10:29,933
Oh. All right, uh, then,
I will also stand.
260
00:10:29,977 --> 00:10:32,196
[chuckles]
261
00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:34,895
You know what, um, these are
really not standing shoes,
262
00:10:34,938 --> 00:10:36,723
so I'm just gonna sit.
263
00:10:36,766 --> 00:10:39,073
I was hoping that we
could have a little chat
264
00:10:39,116 --> 00:10:41,641
about Sheldon Cooper.
265
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,601
I'll start.
266
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:49,605
Sheldon is a very important
asset to this university.
267
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:53,000
And we like to keep
that little fella happy.
268
00:10:53,043 --> 00:10:55,350
But it seems that
your teaching methods
269
00:10:55,393 --> 00:10:57,700
are making him unhappy.
270
00:10:57,744 --> 00:10:59,093
You understand?
271
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:00,616
Yes, ma'am, I do.
272
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:01,922
Great.
273
00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:06,317
You'd like me to turn
his frown upside down.
274
00:11:06,361 --> 00:11:07,449
You know, when you say it,
275
00:11:07,492 --> 00:11:12,454
it sounds more chilling
than fun.
276
00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:13,673
I'm just saying
277
00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:17,067
that he's a sensitive kid,
and you are...
278
00:11:17,111 --> 00:11:19,461
well, whatever this vibe is.
279
00:11:19,504 --> 00:11:21,071
I understand.
280
00:11:21,115 --> 00:11:24,466
Excellent, so you'll take it
easy on him?
281
00:11:24,509 --> 00:11:27,425
No. I'm sorry, ma'am,
I can't do that.
282
00:11:27,469 --> 00:11:29,950
You see, uh...
283
00:11:29,993 --> 00:11:32,343
all these "ma'ams,"
they sound polite,
284
00:11:32,387 --> 00:11:34,781
but then I don't seem
to be getting anywhere.
285
00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:36,696
Well, that's because you're not.
286
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:40,264
You do realize
that I'm your boss?
287
00:11:40,308 --> 00:11:41,701
Yes, ma'am, I do.
288
00:11:41,744 --> 00:11:44,747
And do you realize
that I have tenure?
289
00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:47,010
Ugh, tenure.
290
00:11:47,054 --> 00:11:48,490
What fun is it being president
291
00:11:48,533 --> 00:11:50,274
if I can't threaten
people's jobs?
292
00:11:50,318 --> 00:11:52,624
May I get back to class now?
293
00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:55,192
Oh, fine. And fall off,
or whatever it is.
294
00:11:55,236 --> 00:11:56,541
It's "dismissed," ma'am.
295
00:11:56,585 --> 00:11:58,413
Just go.
296
00:11:59,936 --> 00:12:01,372
[laughs softly]
297
00:12:01,416 --> 00:12:03,200
I heard that giggle.
298
00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:07,161
MEEMAW:
Okay. Soup's on.
299
00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:09,511
Mmm. Wow, looks good.
300
00:12:09,554 --> 00:12:11,121
[grunts]
Oh, geez.
301
00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:12,296
Are you okay?
302
00:12:12,340 --> 00:12:14,995
Oh, I, uh, I tweaked my back.
303
00:12:15,038 --> 00:12:16,300
Oh. How?
304
00:12:16,344 --> 00:12:17,693
I was helping June out.
305
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:20,304
Well, aren't you sweet?
306
00:12:20,348 --> 00:12:22,567
What'd she have
you doing for her?
307
00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:26,136
Yeah, this and that.
308
00:12:26,180 --> 00:12:28,312
This and that what?
309
00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:31,751
Yeah. This and that
and the other thing.
310
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:35,667
Do you not want to tell me?
311
00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:40,237
Well, for the sake of honesty
and because she might tell you,
312
00:12:40,281 --> 00:12:42,457
I was helping her take a shower.
313
00:12:43,588 --> 00:12:45,373
You took a shower with her?
314
00:12:45,416 --> 00:12:48,768
Shetook the shower,
I was just assisting.
315
00:12:48,811 --> 00:12:50,030
So she was naked.
316
00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:52,684
For crying out loud,
we were married.
317
00:12:52,728 --> 00:12:54,338
I've seen her naked
a million times.
318
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:56,471
You think that is helping?
319
00:12:56,514 --> 00:12:58,125
I knew I shouldn't
have been honest.
320
00:12:58,168 --> 00:13:00,823
You shouldn't have been
playing bathroom attendant.
321
00:13:00,867 --> 00:13:02,782
There was nothing sexy about it.
322
00:13:02,825 --> 00:13:05,349
It was like washing a car.
323
00:13:05,393 --> 00:13:07,003
A rusty old car.
324
00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:08,788
Did you scrub her windshield?
325
00:13:08,831 --> 00:13:11,399
What does that even mean?
326
00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:13,314
Her boobs, genius.
327
00:13:14,445 --> 00:13:16,360
I was helping her in the shower
328
00:13:16,404 --> 00:13:18,406
so she didn't fall down.
329
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,235
Well, fine.
330
00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:22,845
And boobs are headlights.
331
00:13:22,889 --> 00:13:24,368
Everybody knows that.
332
00:13:37,207 --> 00:13:38,295
What are you doing?
333
00:13:38,339 --> 00:13:40,036
Watching Sheldon
struggle with homework.
334
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,298
It's so great.
335
00:13:43,735 --> 00:13:44,998
Come on, think.
336
00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,609
What's going on?I can't
337
00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:49,437
figure out
this engineering project.
338
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:52,005
And every time I turn it in,
my professor just rips it up.
339
00:13:52,048 --> 00:13:54,094
Well, ain't this
the fella you liked?
340
00:13:54,137 --> 00:13:56,923
I did, when I thought he was
pushing me to be all I could be,
341
00:13:56,966 --> 00:13:59,273
but it turns out
all he can be is mean.
342
00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,623
I'm sure you'll figure it out.
343
00:14:01,666 --> 00:14:03,494
Could you talk to him?
344
00:14:03,538 --> 00:14:04,974
You're in college now.
345
00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:06,889
Don't you think you should
fight your own battles?
346
00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,325
Does telling on him
to the president
347
00:14:08,369 --> 00:14:09,631
of the university count?
348
00:14:09,674 --> 00:14:10,632
Did it work?
349
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:12,416
No.Then no.
350
00:14:12,460 --> 00:14:13,896
Will you please talk to him?
351
00:14:13,940 --> 00:14:16,420
Ooh, what if your mom does it?
352
00:14:16,464 --> 00:14:17,857
But you were both in the Army.
353
00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:19,162
And you're both
crabby and impatient.
354
00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:20,990
There's a lot of common ground.
355
00:14:21,034 --> 00:14:23,688
You really got under
this guy's skin, huh?
356
00:14:23,732 --> 00:14:24,951
It would seem so.
357
00:14:24,994 --> 00:14:27,214
Lot of common ground.
358
00:14:28,650 --> 00:14:30,608
[phone rings]
359
00:14:30,652 --> 00:14:32,654
[TV playing indistinctly]
360
00:14:32,697 --> 00:14:33,916
Hello.
361
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:35,091
Hey, June.
362
00:14:35,135 --> 00:14:36,614
Connie.
Just wanted to see
363
00:14:36,658 --> 00:14:37,964
if you need anything.
364
00:14:38,007 --> 00:14:39,922
Nah, I'm good,
but thank you, though.
365
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,271
You sure?
366
00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:44,274
Groceries? Dishes?
367
00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:46,363
Help in the shower?
368
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:48,800
Damn it, Dale.
369
00:14:48,844 --> 00:14:49,758
MEEMAW:
I'm sorry,
370
00:14:49,801 --> 00:14:51,194
I'm just not
comfortable with it.
371
00:14:51,238 --> 00:14:52,892
You think I am?
372
00:14:52,935 --> 00:14:56,547
Last time he saw me naked,
gravity was on my side.
373
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:58,114
Then why'd you ask him to do it?
374
00:14:58,158 --> 00:15:00,377
Who else am I gonna ask, Connie?
375
00:15:00,421 --> 00:15:01,944
You got tons of friends.
376
00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:05,208
I've got acquaintances,
I've got clients.
377
00:15:05,252 --> 00:15:06,688
Those aren't exactly people
378
00:15:06,731 --> 00:15:08,559
you want looking
at your hernia scar.
379
00:15:08,603 --> 00:15:10,387
And Dale is?
380
00:15:10,431 --> 00:15:12,955
I got that hernia
by dragging him onto the bed
381
00:15:12,999 --> 00:15:15,436
one night he came in
passed-out drunk.
382
00:15:15,479 --> 00:15:17,177
Look, I'm sorry if I
383
00:15:17,220 --> 00:15:19,875
crossed the line, but you have
nothing to worry about.
384
00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:24,445
Okay.
385
00:15:24,488 --> 00:15:26,142
Look, I promise, next time,
386
00:15:26,186 --> 00:15:28,231
I'll get the kid
who mows my lawn
387
00:15:28,275 --> 00:15:30,103
to come over and hose me off
in the backyard.
388
00:15:30,146 --> 00:15:32,105
Call me.
389
00:15:32,148 --> 00:15:35,282
I'd be happy to hose you off
in the backyard.
390
00:15:35,325 --> 00:15:37,632
[laughs, sighs]
391
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,547
I got to admit,
I'm a little jealous.
392
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:40,374
Of what?
393
00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:41,766
You.
394
00:15:41,810 --> 00:15:42,898
Why?
395
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:45,553
You have the Dale I never got.
396
00:15:45,596 --> 00:15:48,034
I spent a lot of time
397
00:15:48,077 --> 00:15:50,688
polishing that turd,
and you get all the benefits.
398
00:15:50,732 --> 00:15:52,864
Hey, I put my time in
on that, too.
399
00:15:52,908 --> 00:15:54,257
Not as much as me.
400
00:15:54,301 --> 00:15:56,303
When I met him, he was a mess.
401
00:15:56,346 --> 00:16:00,089
[laughs]: You should've seen
where I started.
402
00:16:00,133 --> 00:16:02,091
Well, I think we can both agree,
403
00:16:02,135 --> 00:16:04,267
he is one lucky turd.
404
00:16:04,311 --> 00:16:06,791
Amen, sister.
405
00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:09,359
BOUCHER:
So, let me guess.
406
00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:11,057
You think I'm being
too hard on him
407
00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:12,667
and you want me to lighten up?
408
00:16:12,710 --> 00:16:14,190
He is having a tough time.
409
00:16:14,234 --> 00:16:15,539
It's a tough class.
410
00:16:15,583 --> 00:16:16,888
Look, I get it.
411
00:16:16,932 --> 00:16:18,194
I was in the Army, too,
412
00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:20,327
I-I'm all for being
strict, but...
413
00:16:20,370 --> 00:16:22,590
he doesn't even know
where he's going wrong.
414
00:16:22,633 --> 00:16:24,113
You know, maybe you could just
415
00:16:24,157 --> 00:16:25,810
point him
in the right direction?
416
00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:27,725
You mean, give him the answer?
417
00:16:27,769 --> 00:16:29,640
No, no.
418
00:16:29,684 --> 00:16:30,815
Would you?
419
00:16:30,859 --> 00:16:32,295
What do you think?
420
00:16:32,339 --> 00:16:34,167
No.See?
421
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:38,649
I didn't give you the answer
and you figured it out.
422
00:16:38,693 --> 00:16:40,651
Look...
423
00:16:40,956 --> 00:16:43,524
...your son
is obviously brilliant,
424
00:16:43,567 --> 00:16:46,179
but coddling him won't prepare
him for the real world.
425
00:16:46,222 --> 00:16:49,051
I've been saying that
since the day he was born.
426
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:51,532
Sometimes you have to break
them down to build them back up.
427
00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:53,186
I do that
with my football players.
428
00:16:53,229 --> 00:16:55,318
At least, I try to,
but then the parents
429
00:16:55,362 --> 00:16:57,712
get all bent out of shape,
they come into my office.
430
00:16:57,755 --> 00:16:59,453
You don't say.
431
00:16:59,496 --> 00:17:01,281
Yeah, you would not believe...
432
00:17:01,324 --> 00:17:04,414
Oh. Y-You mean me.
Got it.
433
00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,590
You figured it out again.
434
00:17:07,591 --> 00:17:09,028
Hey, I'm two for two.
435
00:17:11,943 --> 00:17:13,206
Hey.
436
00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:14,598
Did you talk to my teacher?
437
00:17:14,642 --> 00:17:16,035
I did.
438
00:17:16,078 --> 00:17:17,949
So, is he gonna tell me
what I'm doing wrong?
439
00:17:17,993 --> 00:17:19,647
I'm going to.
440
00:17:19,690 --> 00:17:21,736
You're sitting here waiting
to be handed the answer
441
00:17:21,779 --> 00:17:23,433
and that's not how life is.
442
00:17:23,477 --> 00:17:25,087
You got to work for it.
443
00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:27,220
I don't want to hear
a football pep talk.Hey.
444
00:17:27,263 --> 00:17:29,874
This isn't football.
This is real.
445
00:17:29,918 --> 00:17:31,267
Your professor's right.
446
00:17:31,311 --> 00:17:32,660
Now, instead
of pouting,
447
00:17:32,703 --> 00:17:35,054
take charge of your own life.
448
00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:39,754
ADULT SHELDON:
My dad was right.
449
00:17:39,797 --> 00:17:41,495
I had to take charge.
450
00:17:41,538 --> 00:17:44,237
And after 20 more minutes
of pouting,
451
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,239
that's exactly what I did.
452
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:48,284
But despite my best efforts,
453
00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:51,418
I was still no closer
to figuring it out.
454
00:17:51,461 --> 00:17:53,072
I was going to have
to see my work
455
00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:55,726
be torn to pieces one more time.
456
00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,341
Of course.
457
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:03,778
I'd been so focused
on mathematical perfection
458
00:18:03,821 --> 00:18:06,868
that I hadn't taken into account
real-world elements.
459
00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:09,131
Wind can trigger vibrations.
460
00:18:09,175 --> 00:18:12,091
If these vibrations occur at
a system's resonant frequency,
461
00:18:12,134 --> 00:18:14,180
then oscillation
generates excitation
462
00:18:14,223 --> 00:18:17,357
and a bridge can lose
its structural integrity.
463
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,968
Okay, I'm a genius again.
464
00:18:20,011 --> 00:18:21,796
ADULT SHELDON:
I couldn't wait
to hand in my paper
465
00:18:21,839 --> 00:18:24,059
and see the proud look
on Professor Boucher's...
466
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:27,149
No!
467
00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:28,498
I figured it out!
468
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:31,066
It's wind! It's wind!
469
00:18:32,589 --> 00:18:36,289
I hate engineering.
470
00:18:36,332 --> 00:18:38,291
WOLOWITZ:
Wait, so after all this time,
471
00:18:38,334 --> 00:18:40,554
that's your problem
with engineering?
472
00:18:40,597 --> 00:18:41,598
ADULT SHELDON:
Evidently.
473
00:18:41,642 --> 00:18:43,165
WOLOWITZ:
So all the teasing
474
00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:45,254
and all the abuse
had nothing to do with me?
475
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:47,604
ADULT SHELDON:
I'll admit, at first,
I had a chip on my shoulder
476
00:18:47,648 --> 00:18:51,042
because of that class,
but then it was mostly you.
477
00:18:51,086 --> 00:18:52,827
WOLOWITZ:
Unbelievable. When will I learn?
478
00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:54,307
ADULT SHELDON:
I could give you that answer,
479
00:18:54,350 --> 00:18:55,917
but if you figure it out
for yourself,
480
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:57,484
it'll mean so much more.
481
00:18:57,527 --> 00:18:58,572
WOLOWITZ: Goodbye, Sheldon.ADULT SHELDON: Bye.
482
00:19:02,837 --> 00:19:04,230
You wanted to see me, ma'am?
483
00:19:04,273 --> 00:19:06,145
Professor.
484
00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:08,930
I understand you locked
Sheldon out of class.
485
00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:11,193
Well, he was late.
That's my policy.
486
00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:13,152
I need you to do me a favor.
487
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,545
Yes?
488
00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:17,417
Tell me exactly
what his face looked like
489
00:19:17,460 --> 00:19:18,940
when it happened.
490
00:19:18,983 --> 00:19:20,855
Wh... Seriously?
491
00:19:20,898 --> 00:19:22,726
Oh... Paint me a picture.
492
00:19:22,770 --> 00:19:25,512
I want to feel like I was
the one who closed that door.
493
00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:27,209
Oh, I'm gonna sit for this.
494
00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:29,690
Okay, so he approached
495
00:19:29,733 --> 00:19:31,605
the door with that smug look
he has.
496
00:19:31,648 --> 00:19:34,129
Ugh. I know it well.Then,
497
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:35,957
when he realized
it was locked,
498
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:40,222
his face fell into shock
and disbelief.
499
00:19:40,266 --> 00:19:41,963
[laughs]
Nice.
500
00:19:42,006 --> 00:19:43,747
Uh, show me. Do the face.
501
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:48,622
[chuckles]
502
00:19:49,579 --> 00:19:51,407
[laughs]
503
00:19:51,451 --> 00:19:52,887
Oh, sir,
504
00:19:52,930 --> 00:19:55,716
you have turned my frown
upside down.
505
00:19:55,759 --> 00:19:58,588
You are welcome, ma'am.
[laughs]
33354
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
