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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,724 --> 00:00:10,074 - [birds chirping] - [traffic] 2 00:00:10,172 --> 00:00:15,522 - [phone alarm rings] 3 00:00:15,620 --> 00:00:16,900 - [Edmund switches alarm off] 4 00:00:20,965 --> 00:00:23,475 - ♪ 5 00:00:23,586 --> 00:00:26,546 - It's like I'm living with present-day Randy Quaid. 6 00:00:32,275 --> 00:00:34,755 - [squish] - Oh! 7 00:00:34,862 --> 00:00:37,382 What is my life? 8 00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,376 Ow! My toe--fuck! 9 00:00:41,482 --> 00:00:43,342 - Brian Dennehy could get it! 10 00:00:43,448 --> 00:00:45,168 - What? - What? 11 00:00:45,275 --> 00:00:48,655 Edmund, why are you so goddamn noisy? 12 00:00:48,758 --> 00:00:51,238 - I'm so sorry to wake you from your slumber, 13 00:00:51,344 --> 00:00:56,074 but I can't leave your room without catching Hep C! 14 00:00:56,172 --> 00:00:59,282 - NORA: [giggles] Good one. 15 00:00:59,379 --> 00:01:02,589 - No, Nora. Your room is foul. 16 00:01:02,689 --> 00:01:04,969 And if you don't clean your room today, 17 00:01:05,068 --> 00:01:07,408 I'm throwing all of your shit outside 18 00:01:07,517 --> 00:01:09,657 and advertising it on a pole. 19 00:01:09,758 --> 00:01:12,408 - Correct me if I'm wrong, but you're living under my "ruff." 20 00:01:12,517 --> 00:01:13,787 - Your what? - My "ruff." 21 00:01:13,896 --> 00:01:17,406 - Why are you saying "roof" like that? 22 00:01:17,517 --> 00:01:20,377 Also, I am aware that you, and Uncle Wally, 23 00:01:20,482 --> 00:01:21,902 and Grandma are housing me at the moment. 24 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,790 But you can't make me feel bad about it because you don't know 25 00:01:23,896 --> 00:01:25,856 what it's like to be a struggling actor. 26 00:01:25,965 --> 00:01:27,895 - Okay, well, just because I'm not an actor doesn't mean that 27 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,000 I'm not struggling. 28 00:01:29,103 --> 00:01:32,283 The whole city's struggling, Edmund! 29 00:01:32,379 --> 00:01:33,999 - Yeah, okay, I get that. 30 00:01:34,103 --> 00:01:36,033 I'm sorry, I think I'm still adjusting to being canceled. 31 00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:38,407 And your personal hygiene and your overall way of being, 32 00:01:38,517 --> 00:01:40,097 it's honestly sad. 33 00:01:40,206 --> 00:01:42,616 - Messiness is a sign of intelligence. 34 00:01:42,724 --> 00:01:44,524 And in the 2000's, 35 00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:48,240 girls can be both messy and intelligent as well. 36 00:01:50,482 --> 00:01:51,592 - Is that a chicken nugget? 37 00:01:51,689 --> 00:01:53,169 - I think I can eat it from here. 38 00:01:53,275 --> 00:01:55,825 - Don't.[gags] Augh! No! 39 00:01:58,068 --> 00:02:03,518 - ♪ 40 00:02:04,620 --> 00:02:06,000 ♪♪ 41 00:02:07,172 --> 00:02:09,552 - [oldies play on radio] 42 00:02:09,655 --> 00:02:14,165 - Hey, hey, hey! You love my French toast. 43 00:02:14,275 --> 00:02:17,585 Why are you scarfing down all that sausage? 44 00:02:17,689 --> 00:02:21,479 - Ma, I told you, no carbs, all protein. 45 00:02:21,586 --> 00:02:22,826 I'm trying to get bigger. 46 00:02:22,931 --> 00:02:25,211 - So you can show off at your little reunion? 47 00:02:25,310 --> 00:02:27,830 - Ma, it's not a whole reunion. It's just me and my buddies 48 00:02:27,931 --> 00:02:30,451 from my old college Asian Association. 49 00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:34,481 They are very successful and very together right now. 50 00:02:34,586 --> 00:02:38,446 - Oh, I remember those guys. They were huge dorks. 51 00:02:38,551 --> 00:02:40,241 Didn't one guy dress up 52 00:02:40,344 --> 00:02:43,074 like Charlie Chaplin for a whole year? 53 00:02:43,172 --> 00:02:44,762 - We were all dorks back then. 54 00:02:44,862 --> 00:02:48,552 - What kind of Chinese mother names her son Jacque, anyway? 55 00:02:48,655 --> 00:02:52,615 "Hello, I'm Jacque. I'm a silly French person." 56 00:02:52,724 --> 00:02:56,554 - You know, I can't come up with a big career or fancy threads. 57 00:02:56,655 --> 00:03:00,095 But I can be in at least as good a shape as those two. 58 00:03:00,206 --> 00:03:04,786 And if I can hold my own, then it could be a lot of fun 59 00:03:04,896 --> 00:03:06,896 reliving the old days and all the good times we had together. 60 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:09,790 I was thick as thieves with those two. 61 00:03:09,896 --> 00:03:11,066 - Thick as dorks. 62 00:03:11,172 --> 00:03:14,482 - ♪ 63 00:03:15,310 --> 00:03:19,900 - ♪ 64 00:03:27,862 --> 00:03:29,862 - Hello. Do you know where I am supposed to be? 65 00:03:29,965 --> 00:03:32,655 - Sorry, what? - I was wondering if 66 00:03:32,758 --> 00:03:37,138 I might know where my pop-up trailer is? 67 00:03:37,241 --> 00:03:38,591 - Are you River Corpse #2? 68 00:03:38,689 --> 00:03:39,689 - No. 69 00:03:39,793 --> 00:03:41,723 - What's your name? - Ed Lin. 70 00:03:41,827 --> 00:03:43,407 - You're a shadow actor? - That's right. 71 00:03:43,517 --> 00:03:45,067 - [laughs] Yeah, good one, bro. 72 00:03:45,172 --> 00:03:47,002 Your folding stool should be somewhere over there. 73 00:04:00,103 --> 00:04:01,243 - Is that good? 74 00:04:01,344 --> 00:04:04,594 - [Ed's stomach rumbles] - Ooh. Do you guys, um-- 75 00:04:04,689 --> 00:04:05,929 Do you guys know where the bathroom is? 76 00:04:06,034 --> 00:04:07,414 Oh, okay. Oh. 77 00:04:07,517 --> 00:04:08,477 - APP VOICE: You have arrived. 78 00:04:08,586 --> 00:04:10,896 - I have arrived with the sandwiches. 79 00:04:13,241 --> 00:04:14,481 All right. 80 00:04:14,586 --> 00:04:16,516 - [rap music plays on radio] 81 00:04:19,413 --> 00:04:20,593 - [horn honks] 82 00:04:20,689 --> 00:04:22,409 - CAR ALARM: Stand back from Car-rie Underwood. 83 00:04:22,517 --> 00:04:24,547 Car-rie Underwood disarmed. 84 00:04:32,310 --> 00:04:33,380 - ♪ 85 00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:37,902 - NORA: Ah! The Casualty Network. 86 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:41,450 Whoa! That's so cool. 87 00:04:43,068 --> 00:04:46,898 Oh wow, a real TV set. This is awesome. 88 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:48,930 - We gotta move. I'm ready to shoot. 89 00:04:49,034 --> 00:04:50,414 What's the hold-up? 90 00:04:50,517 --> 00:04:52,787 - We're waiting on the shadow re-enactor to get off the john. 91 00:04:52,896 --> 00:04:55,336 - Hello? Hello? 92 00:04:55,448 --> 00:04:59,548 Has anyone ordered Jersey Mike's? 93 00:04:59,655 --> 00:05:01,615 Jersey Mike's, a footlong? 94 00:05:01,724 --> 00:05:05,454 Ow! Oh, fuck, cracked my back. 95 00:05:05,551 --> 00:05:07,341 - Wait a second. She'll work. 96 00:05:07,448 --> 00:05:08,478 Let's shoot it. - Great. 97 00:05:08,586 --> 00:05:09,786 Let's go for one, guys. - [bell rings] 98 00:05:09,896 --> 00:05:11,476 - Hey, you're an actor now. - What? 99 00:05:11,586 --> 00:05:13,616 - Just do what you're doing. - Do what I'm doing? 100 00:05:13,724 --> 00:05:15,214 - Yeah, fuck the other guy. Let's roll on her. 101 00:05:15,310 --> 00:05:17,170 - Fuck the other guy! Quiet on set! Everybody quiet! 102 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:19,825 - ROMAN: And action! 103 00:05:19,931 --> 00:05:21,001 - Like this? 104 00:05:22,862 --> 00:05:24,382 - Nora? 105 00:05:24,482 --> 00:05:26,032 What the fuck are you doing here? 106 00:05:26,137 --> 00:05:27,377 - [Ed's stomach rumbles] - [fart, shit squirts] 107 00:05:27,482 --> 00:05:28,692 - Oh, I have cauldron ass. 108 00:05:33,379 --> 00:05:35,209 - Hey, kids. How was your day at work? 109 00:05:35,310 --> 00:05:37,210 - It was fine. 110 00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:39,030 - It was good. 111 00:05:39,137 --> 00:05:40,447 - Okay. 112 00:05:40,551 --> 00:05:41,691 Okay, what happened? 113 00:05:41,793 --> 00:05:43,283 - It's a long story, but basically I-- 114 00:05:43,379 --> 00:05:47,759 - Basically, Nora miraculously showed up 115 00:05:47,862 --> 00:05:51,212 at my job and was cast on the spot 116 00:05:51,310 --> 00:05:53,280 as Strangle Victim #1. 117 00:05:53,379 --> 00:05:54,759 - I mean, I kind of auditioned for it. 118 00:05:54,862 --> 00:05:57,792 - Yeah, well, I had to go to three different callbacks! 119 00:05:57,896 --> 00:06:01,206 - Three different callbacks? So many. 120 00:06:01,310 --> 00:06:03,520 - Whatever. It's--it's fine. 121 00:06:03,620 --> 00:06:05,030 - It was a weird situation. 122 00:06:05,137 --> 00:06:08,337 But if it upsets you this much, I don't have to do it at all. 123 00:06:08,448 --> 00:06:11,718 - It's fine. I'm fine. - You sure? 124 00:06:11,827 --> 00:06:13,717 - It's fine. I'm fine. - Okay. 125 00:06:13,827 --> 00:06:17,517 - Now, I'm going to take this block 126 00:06:17,620 --> 00:06:20,900 of CTown cholesterol 127 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:25,550 and masturbate to my Wisconsin ex-boyfriend-uh! 128 00:06:27,034 --> 00:06:28,214 - Uh. 129 00:06:28,310 --> 00:06:40,140 - ♪ 130 00:06:40,241 --> 00:06:42,791 - [loud buzz] 131 00:06:42,896 --> 00:06:44,336 - Wally! 132 00:06:44,448 --> 00:06:46,138 - [both laughing] 133 00:06:46,241 --> 00:06:49,031 - Walrus! 134 00:06:49,137 --> 00:06:51,337 Oh, good to see you, man! 135 00:06:51,448 --> 00:06:52,788 - Walrus? Oh man, 136 00:06:52,896 --> 00:06:55,206 I haven't heard that nickname in years. 137 00:06:55,310 --> 00:06:58,100 - That night in college, you got drunk and you sucked straws 138 00:06:58,206 --> 00:06:59,996 in your mouth and barked? 139 00:07:00,103 --> 00:07:02,003 - BOTH: [barking] 140 00:07:02,103 --> 00:07:03,413 - [laughter] 141 00:07:03,517 --> 00:07:04,897 - Hey, you gotta do that later, Walrus. 142 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,830 - Oh, well, we'll see, we'll see. 143 00:07:07,931 --> 00:07:10,101 - Come on in, come on in. Check out the rest of the abode. 144 00:07:10,206 --> 00:07:12,306 - [others exclaim] - Wayne is in the house! 145 00:07:12,413 --> 00:07:13,763 - Wow. 146 00:07:13,862 --> 00:07:16,102 - I decked it out with top-of-the-line electronics. 147 00:07:16,206 --> 00:07:18,166 - Wayne, this is nice. 148 00:07:18,275 --> 00:07:20,375 - ALL: Whoa! 149 00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:21,722 - Still hot. Am I right? 150 00:07:21,827 --> 00:07:25,237 - Tia Carrere, the 10 of all 10's, man! 151 00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:26,794 [laughs] - Check this. 152 00:07:26,896 --> 00:07:27,996 - ["Show me love" by Robin S. plays] 153 00:07:28,103 --> 00:07:31,413 - Oh, wow! 154 00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:34,337 - Surround sound, baby! Isn't it dope? 155 00:07:34,448 --> 00:07:36,478 - Yeah! Dope! 156 00:07:36,586 --> 00:07:39,446 - Porn sounds sick on it! 157 00:07:39,551 --> 00:07:41,661 - Yeah, I bet! 158 00:07:41,758 --> 00:07:43,758 - Hey, all right, all right, enough showing off, Wayne. 159 00:07:43,862 --> 00:07:44,862 Come on. 160 00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,025 - Yeah, all right, all right, all right. 161 00:07:46,137 --> 00:07:47,517 Uh, let's go drink and catch up, huh? 162 00:07:47,620 --> 00:07:49,070 - Yeah, sure! - Whiskey sours, huh? 163 00:07:49,172 --> 00:07:52,312 - ALL: Whiskey sours! 164 00:07:52,413 --> 00:07:54,523 - Whoa, you look good, man. 165 00:07:54,620 --> 00:07:56,450 - Yeah, dude, you are jacked! 166 00:07:56,551 --> 00:07:57,761 - No, no. 167 00:07:57,862 --> 00:07:59,072 Thanks. Yeah, I'm just, you know, 168 00:07:59,172 --> 00:08:01,242 trying to stay healthy and fit and all that. 169 00:08:01,344 --> 00:08:03,414 You look pretty jacked too. 170 00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:05,757 - Aw, come on. - [laughs] 171 00:08:05,862 --> 00:08:08,382 - No, man, I need a better divorce bod. 172 00:08:08,482 --> 00:08:10,072 - Wait, what? 173 00:08:10,172 --> 00:08:11,552 What happened with you and Wendy? 174 00:08:11,655 --> 00:08:12,825 - A long story, bro. 175 00:08:12,931 --> 00:08:14,481 But one with a very happy ending. 176 00:08:14,586 --> 00:08:16,206 - Oh yeah? - I'm free as fuck! 177 00:08:16,310 --> 00:08:18,100 - [laughter] 178 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,586 - Me too! 179 00:08:19,689 --> 00:08:21,409 - No, wait! What, you and Patricia? 180 00:08:21,517 --> 00:08:23,657 Oh, man, I'm sorry, you guys. 181 00:08:23,758 --> 00:08:25,588 - Yeah, divorce is the worst. 182 00:08:25,689 --> 00:08:26,969 - Yeah. - But you know what? 183 00:08:27,068 --> 00:08:28,338 It's really the best thing that ever happened to me. 184 00:08:28,448 --> 00:08:29,968 - Oh yeah? 185 00:08:30,068 --> 00:08:31,998 - I got two motorcycles now, now that Patricia's out of my life. 186 00:08:32,103 --> 00:08:35,073 I mean, if I wanna become a paraplegic, that's my decision. 187 00:08:35,172 --> 00:08:36,142 Mine! 188 00:08:36,241 --> 00:08:37,521 - [laughter] 189 00:08:37,620 --> 00:08:39,720 - You know, Wendy would never let me wear hats or cheat. 190 00:08:39,827 --> 00:08:41,207 Now I can do both! 191 00:08:41,310 --> 00:08:43,140 - [laughter] 192 00:08:43,241 --> 00:08:44,761 - Here's to being single, ready to mingle, 193 00:08:44,862 --> 00:08:47,142 and make your thing-thing tingle. 194 00:08:47,241 --> 00:08:49,861 - That's kind of gross, but hell yeah! 195 00:08:51,379 --> 00:08:54,279 Hey, you, uh--you holding out on us, Walrus? 196 00:08:54,379 --> 00:08:55,689 - Oh, no, no. 197 00:08:55,793 --> 00:08:59,283 I started going out with somebody, for, like, six months. 198 00:08:59,379 --> 00:09:00,549 Brenda. 199 00:09:00,655 --> 00:09:02,165 - Brenda. Ooh, that's a sexy-ass name, dog. 200 00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:03,375 - Six months. 201 00:09:03,482 --> 00:09:05,382 That's, like, 100 months in middle-aged man years. 202 00:09:05,482 --> 00:09:06,662 - [laughter] 203 00:09:06,758 --> 00:09:08,338 - Hey, who else do you got on the roster? 204 00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:09,618 - On the roster? 205 00:09:09,724 --> 00:09:11,344 - You know, who else do you got on rotation? 206 00:09:11,448 --> 00:09:13,408 You always have to have more than three sides. 207 00:09:13,517 --> 00:09:17,687 - Mm, love me some sides. - Sides? 208 00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,587 You mean like women? - BOTH: Yes! 209 00:09:20,689 --> 00:09:22,899 - Oh! Oh. 210 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,240 Uh, no, no, no, no. 211 00:09:24,344 --> 00:09:27,524 I'm pretty good with just the one. Yeah. 212 00:09:27,620 --> 00:09:29,410 But she's, like, really, really pretty. 213 00:09:29,517 --> 00:09:30,587 - They all are. 214 00:09:30,689 --> 00:09:31,999 - [chuckles] - At first! 215 00:09:32,103 --> 00:09:34,073 - [laughter] 216 00:09:34,172 --> 00:09:35,552 - Boy, you know what, tonight? 217 00:09:35,655 --> 00:09:36,855 We're all single, okay? 218 00:09:36,965 --> 00:09:39,205 Just like back in the day! 219 00:09:39,310 --> 00:09:41,900 - [shouting] 220 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:45,340 - ♪ 221 00:09:45,448 --> 00:09:46,478 ♪ Pump up the jam 222 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:47,516 ♪ Pump it up 223 00:09:47,620 --> 00:09:49,410 ♪ While your feet are stomping ♪ 224 00:09:49,517 --> 00:09:51,067 ♪ And the jam is pumping 225 00:09:51,172 --> 00:09:53,662 ♪ Look ahead, the crowd is jumpin' ♪ 226 00:09:53,758 --> 00:09:58,208 - I'm having a reaction or face gout. 227 00:10:01,310 --> 00:10:04,210 - [cheering] 228 00:10:04,310 --> 00:10:05,310 - Remember that movie? 229 00:10:05,413 --> 00:10:07,723 - [laughter] 230 00:10:07,827 --> 00:10:09,587 - ♪ Make my day 231 00:10:09,689 --> 00:10:12,029 ♪ Make my day, make my-- 232 00:10:12,137 --> 00:10:15,097 ♪ Make my, make, make my day 233 00:10:15,206 --> 00:10:17,236 ♪ Make my day 234 00:10:17,344 --> 00:10:18,454 - [cough] 235 00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:21,451 - [laughter] 236 00:10:21,551 --> 00:10:22,931 - WAYNE: The same Wally! 237 00:10:23,034 --> 00:10:24,764 - ♪ Yo! Pump up the jam 238 00:10:24,862 --> 00:10:26,722 ♪ Pump it up, pump it up 239 00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:28,617 ♪ Yo, pump it, pump up the jam ♪ 240 00:10:28,724 --> 00:10:30,454 ♪ Pump it up, pump it up 241 00:10:30,551 --> 00:10:31,761 ♪ Yo, pump it 242 00:10:31,862 --> 00:10:33,622 ♪ Pump up the jam, pump it up 243 00:10:33,724 --> 00:10:34,934 ♪ Pump it up, yo, pump it 244 00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:37,034 ♪ Pump up the jam, pump it 245 00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:38,827 ♪ Pump it, pump it, pump it 246 00:10:38,931 --> 00:10:43,481 ♪ 247 00:10:43,586 --> 00:10:47,026 - [indistinct chatter] 248 00:10:47,137 --> 00:10:49,277 - ♪ 249 00:10:49,379 --> 00:10:55,239 - [clicking] 250 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,450 - Hey, Edmund, what's wrong? 251 00:11:06,551 --> 00:11:09,311 - EDMUND: Nothing. I just feel like I suck at this. 252 00:11:09,413 --> 00:11:11,313 - Everyone was laughing on that last one. 253 00:11:11,413 --> 00:11:12,763 - EDMUND: Yeah, at me! 254 00:11:12,862 --> 00:11:15,482 - It was vulnerable and charismatic. 255 00:11:15,586 --> 00:11:20,096 - I don't know that an ill-timed fart can be charismatic, but... 256 00:11:20,206 --> 00:11:25,236 I know this is what I want to do, that I feel alive doing it. 257 00:11:25,344 --> 00:11:29,144 I just...wonder if it's worth it, you know? 258 00:11:29,241 --> 00:11:31,451 - Do you love it? 259 00:11:31,551 --> 00:11:33,831 - Yeah. I do. 260 00:11:33,931 --> 00:11:34,931 - Ah, there you are. 261 00:11:35,034 --> 00:11:36,144 - Oh, what up, Pizza Top? 262 00:11:36,241 --> 00:11:37,551 - Yeah, you watch it there, Goose. 263 00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:39,405 - Lay some eggs. [laughs] 264 00:11:39,517 --> 00:11:40,447 - NICK: Good news, kid. 265 00:11:40,551 --> 00:11:42,031 We start filming the new season next week 266 00:11:42,137 --> 00:11:44,857 and the director wants you to play the Nevada Knuckler. 267 00:11:44,965 --> 00:11:46,095 - Me? - Yeah, good job. 268 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:47,166 - Really? 269 00:11:47,275 --> 00:11:48,405 - NICK: The director's gonna be psyched. 270 00:11:48,517 --> 00:11:49,997 - Fucking kidding me. 271 00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:52,616 - Oh my-- 272 00:11:52,724 --> 00:11:54,864 - ♪ 273 00:11:58,517 --> 00:12:02,517 - JACQUE: Ace, king, queen, 274 00:12:02,620 --> 00:12:03,720 jack of hearts, my friends. 275 00:12:03,827 --> 00:12:06,587 - Whoa! - That's cool! 276 00:12:06,689 --> 00:12:08,309 Hey, how did you learn how to do that? 277 00:12:08,413 --> 00:12:10,383 - Oh, I've been listening to this Penn Gillette podcast. 278 00:12:10,482 --> 00:12:11,762 Crazy stuff. 279 00:12:11,862 --> 00:12:14,832 Now that I'm single, I have so much free time. 280 00:12:14,931 --> 00:12:17,761 - So, um, was it hard for you guys to start over? 281 00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:18,862 - At first. 282 00:12:18,965 --> 00:12:21,375 But now I freaking love being alone. 283 00:12:21,482 --> 00:12:22,902 - Yeah, it's the best. 284 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:25,100 I've never been happier and not horny at all. 285 00:12:25,206 --> 00:12:29,376 I have actual shit-tons of meaningless sex, like shitloads. 286 00:12:29,482 --> 00:12:31,452 - Hey, what about you, Walrus? Where are you living these days? 287 00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:32,861 - I'm still living in Queens. 288 00:12:32,965 --> 00:12:34,445 - Oh yeah, Queens. Hey, Queens is nice. 289 00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:35,721 It's way cool. 290 00:12:35,827 --> 00:12:37,277 You know, I--I looked at a building there, LIC, 291 00:12:37,379 --> 00:12:41,029 where all the Mets live. Gorgeous views! 292 00:12:41,137 --> 00:12:42,997 - I'm still living in the same house I grew up in. 293 00:12:43,103 --> 00:12:45,103 - You live alone, I hope? - Mm-mm. 294 00:12:45,206 --> 00:12:46,896 I live with my mom and my daughter. 295 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:50,620 - Oh, Nora! Sweet Nora. What a cute kid. 296 00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:53,664 - Yeah, she's almost 30 now. 297 00:12:53,758 --> 00:12:56,098 - Whoa! Nice! 298 00:12:56,206 --> 00:12:57,546 - Some real Mother Teresa shit right there. 299 00:12:57,655 --> 00:12:59,585 - Good Asian son of the month kind of thing, am I right? 300 00:12:59,689 --> 00:13:01,789 - Oh, no, it's nothing like that. 301 00:13:01,896 --> 00:13:03,066 - What are you gonna do when, you know, 302 00:13:03,172 --> 00:13:04,902 things get serious with Brenda? 303 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:06,720 - Mm. - What do you mean? 304 00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:09,097 - You can't have your girlfriend move into your childhood home. 305 00:13:09,206 --> 00:13:12,546 - Oh, yeah, right. - With your mom and old kid. 306 00:13:14,620 --> 00:13:16,660 - I guess I never really thought that far ahead. 307 00:13:16,758 --> 00:13:18,168 - WAYNE: Well, you know what? 308 00:13:18,275 --> 00:13:19,895 You're definitely gonna need to get your own pad real soon. 309 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:21,380 - You think so? 310 00:13:21,482 --> 00:13:24,482 - Hey, but don't worry 'cuz, uh, I've got a great broker. 311 00:13:24,586 --> 00:13:25,966 - [door buzzer] 312 00:13:26,068 --> 00:13:27,688 - Oh! - Oh! 313 00:13:27,793 --> 00:13:29,763 - I think the main event has arrived. 314 00:13:29,862 --> 00:13:31,342 - The main event? What's that? 315 00:13:31,448 --> 00:13:32,208 - We got a stripper. 316 00:13:32,310 --> 00:13:34,480 - [laughs] You got a what? 317 00:13:34,586 --> 00:13:37,206 - Don't you worry, Walrus, she is top of the line! 318 00:13:37,310 --> 00:13:38,830 - Guys, guys, guys, really, a stripper? 319 00:13:38,931 --> 00:13:39,901 Are you sure? 320 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,860 - Walrus, what happens in this loft-- 321 00:13:41,965 --> 00:13:43,585 - BOTH: --stays in this loft! 322 00:13:43,689 --> 00:13:45,279 - No, no, no... 323 00:13:45,379 --> 00:13:48,899 - Hey, here she is! Welcome Mindy, folks! 324 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:51,480 - [hoarsely] It's Brandi. - Hey, Brandi! 325 00:13:51,586 --> 00:13:52,966 - Who called for the party? 326 00:13:53,068 --> 00:13:55,378 - Yeah. - Hey, sweetie. 327 00:13:55,482 --> 00:13:56,972 - [chuckles] 328 00:13:57,068 --> 00:13:58,308 - Where's the vodka? 329 00:13:58,413 --> 00:14:01,973 - Are you okay? Do you need a lozenge? 330 00:14:02,068 --> 00:14:04,518 - I just have strep throat, is all. 331 00:14:04,620 --> 00:14:06,030 Okay if I smoke in here? 332 00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:07,967 Don't worry, they won't stink up the joint. 333 00:14:08,068 --> 00:14:09,548 They're menthols. 334 00:14:09,655 --> 00:14:11,095 - You guys, this isn't cool. 335 00:14:11,206 --> 00:14:14,096 You know, we're too old for this. 336 00:14:14,206 --> 00:14:15,686 In fact, I think she's too old for this. 337 00:14:15,793 --> 00:14:17,453 - Hey, strippers, they're feminists. 338 00:14:17,551 --> 00:14:18,661 - Huh? 339 00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:20,968 - When did you become such a prude? 340 00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:22,548 - I am not a prude. 341 00:14:22,655 --> 00:14:24,685 - Okay, prove it. - Huh? 342 00:14:24,793 --> 00:14:26,243 - Who's up for some Twister? 343 00:14:28,137 --> 00:14:32,207 - I love Twister. Helen Hunt was so good in that. 344 00:14:32,310 --> 00:14:34,970 You remember that sitcom "Wings"? 345 00:14:35,068 --> 00:14:36,548 - I love "Wings"! 346 00:14:38,206 --> 00:14:42,276 - ♪ 347 00:14:43,551 --> 00:14:44,661 - [knock on door] 348 00:14:44,758 --> 00:14:46,208 - Hi, Edmund. 349 00:14:47,517 --> 00:14:48,967 Listen, can we talk? 350 00:14:50,965 --> 00:14:54,655 - So you're gonna be the Nevada Knuckler. 351 00:14:54,758 --> 00:14:56,068 - No, I'm not. 352 00:14:56,172 --> 00:14:59,412 - What? What happened? 353 00:14:59,517 --> 00:15:01,477 - I quit. - Why? 354 00:15:07,034 --> 00:15:10,244 - Because I don't love it like you love it. 355 00:15:10,344 --> 00:15:13,624 I don't know if I'll ever love a job like you love acting. 356 00:15:13,724 --> 00:15:16,764 I'm--I'm still searching for what that thing is. 357 00:15:16,862 --> 00:15:17,972 And--and I just want you to know 358 00:15:18,068 --> 00:15:23,858 that I love you more than shadow acting. 359 00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,585 - Thanks, Nora. 360 00:15:27,689 --> 00:15:33,309 "The human being who acts is the human being who lives." 361 00:15:35,275 --> 00:15:37,275 - [whispers] Are you stoned? 362 00:15:37,379 --> 00:15:39,619 - Yeah, I smoked a ton of your weed. 363 00:15:39,724 --> 00:15:42,694 Oh, I've been up here for hours. I can't move. 364 00:15:42,793 --> 00:15:45,313 - Whoa, this is kind of like a "Misery" situation. 365 00:15:45,413 --> 00:15:48,413 I'll come up and join ya. - No, I 'm heady right now! 366 00:15:48,517 --> 00:15:52,307 - ♪ 367 00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:59,760 - Oh, I don't know how much longer I can hold this position. 368 00:15:59,862 --> 00:16:04,032 - BRANDI: I can do Child's Pose for, like, seven hours. 369 00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:05,827 Oh, oof! - What happened? 370 00:16:05,931 --> 00:16:08,931 - Cramp! [groans] It's my stripping leg. 371 00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:10,794 Aah! Ah, ah, ah! 372 00:16:10,896 --> 00:16:13,206 [grunts] 373 00:16:13,310 --> 00:16:14,930 Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 374 00:16:15,034 --> 00:16:17,344 Yeah, yeah, oh my god. 375 00:16:17,448 --> 00:16:19,168 Oh, yeah, that's it, that's it. 376 00:16:19,275 --> 00:16:20,995 That's it, that's it. 377 00:16:21,103 --> 00:16:22,663 That's it. 378 00:16:22,758 --> 00:16:24,068 - Okay, game over. 379 00:16:26,137 --> 00:16:27,307 - Hey, Wally, where are you going? 380 00:16:27,413 --> 00:16:29,723 The bathroom's that way. - Yeah, I think I better go. 381 00:16:29,827 --> 00:16:32,027 - Hey, dude, you can't just leave. 382 00:16:32,137 --> 00:16:34,237 - Yeah, I gotta go. 383 00:16:34,344 --> 00:16:36,794 You guys, you got a whole new lease on life. 384 00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:37,786 And we all do. 385 00:16:37,896 --> 00:16:40,586 But I don't wanna fuck mine up. 386 00:16:40,689 --> 00:16:42,899 I don't wanna be single and sad and desperate. 387 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,790 I just wanna get serious with Brenda. 388 00:16:44,896 --> 00:16:46,236 I don't wanna waste any more time. 389 00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:49,484 I've wasted too much time already. 390 00:16:49,586 --> 00:16:51,616 I'm gonna ask Brenda if she wants to live together. 391 00:16:51,724 --> 00:16:54,794 - Wally, good for you. 392 00:16:54,896 --> 00:16:58,476 - Yeah. That is good. 393 00:16:59,689 --> 00:17:02,519 - Brandi, it was "Mad About You," not "Wings." 394 00:17:02,620 --> 00:17:04,100 - Oh, shit! 395 00:17:04,206 --> 00:17:07,716 - [suspenseful music] 396 00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:11,027 - Cut! Cut! Cut. 397 00:17:11,137 --> 00:17:12,687 What are you doing? 398 00:17:12,793 --> 00:17:15,003 - I'm dismembering him. 399 00:17:15,103 --> 00:17:16,483 - I don't know, something's off. 400 00:17:16,586 --> 00:17:18,586 Let's lose the knife and try a gun. 401 00:17:18,689 --> 00:17:21,139 - Bring in the gun. 402 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:24,171 Okay, reset. And action. 403 00:17:24,275 --> 00:17:27,655 - [suspenseful music] 404 00:17:34,862 --> 00:17:36,452 - ROMAN: No, no, no, no. Cut! 405 00:17:36,551 --> 00:17:38,721 This scene is garbage. Sorry, Ed. 406 00:17:38,827 --> 00:17:42,517 It's not you, but it is you, because you're a part of it. 407 00:17:42,620 --> 00:17:45,520 But it's just not working. Let's go. 408 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:49,450 - Okay, let's take five. 409 00:17:49,551 --> 00:17:50,591 - [bell rings] 410 00:17:53,172 --> 00:17:55,142 - Psst. Hey, kid? 411 00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:03,102 I know this all sucks. 412 00:18:03,206 --> 00:18:07,516 I hate it here. It's a fucking shithole. 413 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:11,790 Truth is, unless you're working full time for "Law and Order," 414 00:18:11,896 --> 00:18:14,966 New York sucks for film and TV. 415 00:18:15,068 --> 00:18:19,828 If I didn't share custody with my ex of my dumbass kid, 416 00:18:19,931 --> 00:18:21,791 I wouldn't live here. 417 00:18:21,896 --> 00:18:26,756 You gotta go to where the jobs flow like a river after a storm, 418 00:18:26,862 --> 00:18:30,832 where everybody's happy, and the weather never changes. 419 00:18:30,931 --> 00:18:35,451 Where the blow is as pure as the fresh Colorado snow. 420 00:18:37,724 --> 00:18:39,934 You feel me? 421 00:18:40,034 --> 00:18:43,524 - Where is this glorious place? 422 00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:46,760 Is it heaven? 423 00:18:46,862 --> 00:18:48,692 It sounds like heaven. 424 00:18:48,793 --> 00:18:50,623 - [angelic choir] 425 00:18:54,344 --> 00:18:57,034 - Nora! Nora! Nora! - What! 426 00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,967 - You know how we always say that New York isn't all that? 427 00:19:00,068 --> 00:19:01,718 - We don't always say that. 428 00:19:01,827 --> 00:19:03,857 - Yeah, well, okay, if I'm gonna be acting, 429 00:19:03,965 --> 00:19:07,965 I need to go where the jobs flow like a river after a storm. 430 00:19:08,068 --> 00:19:10,788 Where everyone is happy, and the weather never changes, 431 00:19:10,896 --> 00:19:15,276 and the blow is as pure as the fresh Colorado snow! 432 00:19:15,379 --> 00:19:16,899 Do you feel me? 433 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,140 - Reno, Nevada, baby! - No, not Reno, Nevada. 434 00:19:19,241 --> 00:19:21,481 No, it's the next best thing. 435 00:19:21,586 --> 00:19:25,756 LA. Los Angeles. Hollywood. 436 00:19:25,862 --> 00:19:27,662 It's been in front of me this whole time! 437 00:19:29,275 --> 00:19:31,825 - Oh, yeah, for sure, dude. LA. 438 00:19:31,931 --> 00:19:34,971 Uh, if you can make it in that city, you can make it anywhere. 439 00:19:35,068 --> 00:19:37,238 That's in New York. 440 00:19:37,344 --> 00:19:39,724 Well, you can get--make a brand-new start of it. 441 00:19:39,827 --> 00:19:42,717 - No, no, no, no! I've made up my mind. 442 00:19:42,827 --> 00:19:45,207 LA, here I come. 443 00:19:48,517 --> 00:19:52,237 - ♪ 444 00:19:52,344 --> 00:19:54,904 - Can't believe this is my last day in New York 445 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:58,140 before I go to Los "Anheles." 446 00:19:58,241 --> 00:20:00,451 - Hey, Edmund, make sure you go to Barney's Beanery. 447 00:20:00,551 --> 00:20:02,661 I hear that Jackson Browne used to hang out there. 448 00:20:02,758 --> 00:20:04,618 - I'll miss you, Edmund. 449 00:20:04,724 --> 00:20:07,004 - I'll miss you too, Grandma. And yes, Uncle Wally. 450 00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:10,693 Oh, I'm so excited! 451 00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:13,343 The one thing I'm a little worried about is being on 452 00:20:13,448 --> 00:20:15,168 that bus for so long. 453 00:20:15,275 --> 00:20:17,375 I'm very prone to bus sickness. 454 00:20:17,482 --> 00:20:19,412 - Not to mention all the drifters 455 00:20:19,517 --> 00:20:21,447 you're likely to encounter. 456 00:20:21,551 --> 00:20:24,521 Most of them are serial killers. 457 00:20:24,620 --> 00:20:25,550 - Really? 458 00:20:25,655 --> 00:20:27,825 - WALLY: Come on, Ma, he'll be fine. 459 00:20:27,931 --> 00:20:31,141 As long as you don't fall asleep. 460 00:20:31,241 --> 00:20:34,141 - Oh, shit. 461 00:20:34,241 --> 00:20:37,721 I needed to think this through more. [sobs] 462 00:20:37,827 --> 00:20:39,617 - Wait. I have an idea. 463 00:20:39,724 --> 00:20:41,244 - ED AND GRANDMA: You do? - You do? 464 00:20:41,344 --> 00:20:44,724 - What if instead of the bus, I drove you? 465 00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:47,477 - Yes! Oh my god, yes! And we can take turns driving 466 00:20:47,586 --> 00:20:50,826 and putting our hand out the window and doing the arm worm. 467 00:20:50,931 --> 00:20:53,451 - No, I only drive my car. You don't--you can't. 468 00:20:53,551 --> 00:20:54,861 You can do the arm worm, though. 469 00:20:54,965 --> 00:20:56,305 - Deal! - Really? 470 00:20:56,413 --> 00:20:57,973 - Los Angeles, here we come! 471 00:20:58,068 --> 00:20:59,788 - Yes! Yes! 472 00:20:59,896 --> 00:21:01,026 - [cheers and applause] 473 00:21:01,137 --> 00:21:02,477 - [laughs] 474 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:10,620 - ♪ 475 00:21:26,448 --> 00:21:27,928 ♪♪ 476 00:21:28,034 --> 00:21:29,834 - Who the [bleep] is Awkwafina? 477 00:21:29,931 --> 00:21:31,831 - ♪ 478 00:21:31,931 --> 00:21:34,381 - ♪ MTV 479 00:21:34,431 --> 00:21:38,981 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 34052

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