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1
00:00:01,167 --> 00:00:04,207
♪♪
2
00:00:12,470 --> 00:00:14,350
♪ Love ♪
3
00:00:16,057 --> 00:00:19,977
♪ love, exciting and new ♪
4
00:00:20,061 --> 00:00:21,561
♪ come aboard ♪
5
00:00:24,232 --> 00:00:28,112
♪ we're expecting you ♪
6
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:31,784
♪ and love ♪
7
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:35,905
♪ love is life's
sweetest reward ♪
8
00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:37,664
♪ let it flow ♪
9
00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:44,456
♪ it floats back to you ♪
10
00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:47,964
♪ the love boat ♪
11
00:00:48,047 --> 00:00:52,337
♪ soon will be making
another run ♪
12
00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:55,967
♪ the love boat ♪
13
00:00:56,055 --> 00:01:00,685
♪ promises something
for everyone ♪
14
00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:08,319
♪ set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance ♪
15
00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:12,611
♪ and love, love ♪
16
00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:16,827
♪ love won't hurt anymore ♪
17
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:20,710
♪ it's an open smile ♪
18
00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:24,829
♪ on a friendly shore ♪
19
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:28,378
♪ the love boat ♪
20
00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:33,383
♪ soon will be making
another run ♪
21
00:01:33,468 --> 00:01:35,348
♪ welcome aboard ♪
22
00:01:35,428 --> 00:01:41,478
♪ it's love ♪
23
00:01:41,559 --> 00:01:44,479
♪ welcome aboard, it's love ♪
24
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:54,819
We'd like to welcome you
to our special cruise
25
00:01:54,906 --> 00:01:56,526
to cabo San Lucas
26
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:59,076
to celebrate the 200th voyage
of the pacific Princess.
27
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:04,539
Excuse me.
28
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:04,539
I know...Yes?
29
00:02:04,624 --> 00:02:05,544
Are you the captain?
30
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:06,875
Yes, I'm captain stubing.
31
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,090
I'm Karen Cooper.
This is my husband, Larry.
32
00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:10,260
It's my pleasure.
33
00:02:10,338 --> 00:02:11,918
Thank you.
Uh, which way is --
34
00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:14,086
Mr. and Mrs. Cooper, I'd like
to have you meet Peter duchin.
35
00:02:14,175 --> 00:02:15,385
He and his orchestra will be
36
00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:17,548
entertaining at our special
200th cruise party
37
00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:18,887
our final night.
38
00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:18,887
Oh.
39
00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:20,392
Yes, I love playing
these cruises.
40
00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:21,893
It's just like a paid vacation.
41
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:25,345
Peter duchin, eddy's boy?
42
00:02:25,436 --> 00:02:27,686
Oh, he was terrific
in "the eddy duchin story,"
43
00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:29,402
one of my favorite
movies.
44
00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:32,242
Actually, Tyrone power
was in the movie.
45
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,568
Oh.
46
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,568
Really?
47
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,453
Everybody called him eddy.
48
00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:37,570
Why don't we let this nice,
young man go find his piano?
49
00:02:37,657 --> 00:02:39,117
We'll go find our cabin.
50
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,370
Very nice meeting you.
Thank you.
51
00:02:40,451 --> 00:02:41,831
I'll see you later, captain.
52
00:02:40,451 --> 00:02:41,831
Bye-bye.
53
00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:45,081
Well, enjoy the cruise.
54
00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:45,081
Captain, which way is aloha 302?
55
00:02:45,164 --> 00:02:47,254
Ah, through those doors
to the left and down one deck.
56
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:48,753
Thank you.
57
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,625
Yeah, we -- we reserved
that cabin special.
58
00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:53,512
It -- it was recommended
by a guy I met...
59
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:55,130
In the supermarket line.
60
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:55,130
Right.
61
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,256
How about we stop yapping
and get to that cabin?
62
00:02:57,343 --> 00:03:00,103
It's a second honeymoon.
She can't wait to get me alone.
63
00:03:00,179 --> 00:03:01,469
Wow.
64
00:03:01,556 --> 00:03:03,726
I'm George Hammond,
and this is my wife, Mary.
65
00:03:03,808 --> 00:03:05,228
Well, welcome
to our 200th cruise.
66
00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:06,440
Thank you.
67
00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:08,439
"Have tractor. Will travel."
68
00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:10,901
George is
a tractor salesman,
69
00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:12,442
best in his district.
70
00:03:12,525 --> 00:03:15,275
They call him the Lee iacocca
of the corn belt.
71
00:03:15,361 --> 00:03:17,411
Excuse me,
Judy, Andy warhol is here.
72
00:03:17,488 --> 00:03:18,618
[ Gasps ]
Andy warhol?
73
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:19,948
Well, you know, the artist.
74
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,993
He's gonna be on this cruise?
75
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,993
Yes.
76
00:03:22,076 --> 00:03:23,946
He's gonna help
us celebrate our 200th voyage.
77
00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:25,577
He's gonna
pick some lucky passenger
78
00:03:25,663 --> 00:03:26,833
and paint her portrait.
79
00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:28,745
Hmm.
80
00:03:28,833 --> 00:03:32,253
[ Gasping,
indistinct conversations ]
81
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:33,377
Hey.
82
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:36,931
Come on, George.
83
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,309
Hello. I'm...
84
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,309
Andy warhol.
85
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,480
And this is...
86
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,480
Ramon, your executive assistant.
87
00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:47,769
I've read all about you.
88
00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:50,312
Welcome to our 200th cruise,
Mr. Warhol.
89
00:03:50,396 --> 00:03:52,516
Uh, you and your party
are on the promenade deck.
90
00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:54,317
I'll show you the way.
91
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:55,990
I was wondering,
how does an artist
92
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,819
know when a painting
is truly successful?
93
00:03:57,904 --> 00:04:00,284
When the check's cleared.
94
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:01,365
Excuse me, doc,
can I see you a minute?
95
00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:02,829
Thank you. Excuse us.
Just a moment.
96
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,159
Pardon us. Excuse me.
97
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,159
What?
98
00:04:04,243 --> 00:04:06,333
Doc, doc.
99
00:04:04,243 --> 00:04:06,333
Huh?
100
00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:08,332
You gotta help me,
or I'm gonna lose my job.
101
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:09,674
What?
102
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:10,919
Do you remember, last month,
103
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,380
I threw that surprise birthday
party for Isaac in my office?
104
00:04:13,461 --> 00:04:15,001
Sure, I do.
105
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:16,338
Now, can you keep your job?
106
00:04:16,422 --> 00:04:19,012
I spilled some champagne
on some files,
107
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:22,182
and after I dried everything off
and I put everything away,
108
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:25,182
I couldn't find a receipt
for a ton of butter.
109
00:04:25,264 --> 00:04:27,524
You're gonna lose your job
over one piece of paper?
110
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,190
Doc, Lionel Douglas
is coming on the ship today
111
00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:31,729
to do his yearly audit
of my books.
112
00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:33,483
The man loves to torture me.
113
00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:35,734
He says it helps him relax
to watch me hyperventilate.
114
00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:38,147
Gopher, every year
he comes to audit your books.
115
00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,316
Every year you go crazy.
116
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:41,454
Every year you pass the audit.
117
00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:44,031
When Lionel Douglas
finds out that I cannot account
118
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:47,827
for a ton of butter, I'll be
grooming chihuahuas in Moscow.
119
00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:55,712
Aloha 302, bingo.
120
00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:55,712
[ Whistles ]
121
00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:57,545
How much did this cost you?
122
00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:02,763
Everything I saved
while you were in jail.
123
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:05,514
Well, what if the stamp
isn't here?
124
00:05:05,596 --> 00:05:06,716
Don't say that.
125
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:08,176
It's here.
126
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:10,016
Let's get started.
127
00:05:12,770 --> 00:05:16,520
Yesterday I'm in prison.
128
00:05:16,607 --> 00:05:18,737
Today I'm with you.
129
00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:21,698
Couldn't we get something
else started first?
130
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:23,029
Oh, honey.
131
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:25,744
You've been away
for five years.
132
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:27,945
Let's find the stamp,
and then --
133
00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:31,576
then we can get to know
each other again, all right?
134
00:05:33,332 --> 00:05:34,922
Okay.
135
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:40,090
Jimmy was a little nuts,
you know?
136
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,893
He could have hidden
that stamp anywhere.
137
00:05:45,344 --> 00:05:47,764
Let's find this thing.
138
00:05:49,974 --> 00:05:51,314
Hand me a screwdriver, honey.
139
00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:11,912
If I'd had you boys in prison,
I'd been home a lot sooner.
140
00:06:13,539 --> 00:06:15,039
Larry.
141
00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:24,630
I think I feel
something here.
142
00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:25,757
[ Knock on door ]
143
00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:28,643
Get down, quick.
144
00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:28,643
I can't.
145
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:31,471
My bracelet's caught.
146
00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,807
Hello. I'm Isaac Washington,
chief barman,
147
00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:35,523
and this is a gift of the --
148
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:42,146
um, is there anything
I can help you with?
149
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:46,985
A piece of dust way
back there, hard to grip.
150
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:48,493
I think I could get it.
151
00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:51,204
See, I'm allergic.
152
00:06:51,285 --> 00:06:52,995
I see.
153
00:06:51,285 --> 00:06:52,995
It's no problem, though.
154
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:54,369
I brought my tools with me.
155
00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:00,040
Why?
156
00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:00,040
So he can fix things.
157
00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:02,338
My husband is a fix-it man.
158
00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:02,338
Yeah.
159
00:07:02,421 --> 00:07:04,131
If I can't fix it,
it ain't broke.
160
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:06,005
[ Laughing ]
161
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,682
Oh.
162
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:09,050
Hey, well, listen,
if you get a minute,
163
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:11,217
my blender button
is stuck on puree.
164
00:07:11,305 --> 00:07:12,515
Yeah.
165
00:07:11,305 --> 00:07:12,515
If, at some time, you know...
166
00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:15,138
Oh, yeah,
piece of cake, piece of cake.
167
00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:17,476
Whew! That was close.
168
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:20,062
Why didn't you
lock the door?
169
00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:23,478
I got outta the habit.
170
00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:25,528
In the slammer,
they lock the door for you.
171
00:07:25,611 --> 00:07:28,161
Larry, help!
172
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,199
Oh, yeah.
173
00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:39,496
[ Excited chatter ]
174
00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:42,094
♪♪
175
00:07:56,767 --> 00:07:59,187
Stack this stuff anywhere.
I won't need it again.
176
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,733
[ Clears throat ]
177
00:08:02,815 --> 00:08:04,815
Ah, Mr. Douglas, sir.
178
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:06,191
Oh, I was so worried
about you.
179
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:07,397
I thought
you'd missed the ship.
180
00:08:07,486 --> 00:08:10,566
Let's not start the day
with a lie.
181
00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:13,906
I'll need an hour to unpack,
and then we'll begin.
182
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,123
Sir, what say
we postpone the audit?
183
00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,463
What say we don't?
184
00:08:17,538 --> 00:08:19,458
But, sir, you know, with
all the festivities onboard
185
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:20,790
this trip, I'd had to have
you miss all the fun.
186
00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:22,535
Don't be silly.
187
00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:25,587
Seeing you squirm is all
the fun that I need.
188
00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:30,548
♪♪
189
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:35,562
[ Indistinct conversations ]
190
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,600
Oh, wait...Here.
191
00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:41,274
Excuse me,
you are such a lovely vision.
192
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:44,154
Would you mind
if Andy photographed you?
193
00:08:45,524 --> 00:08:47,824
Oh, thank you so much.
194
00:08:47,902 --> 00:08:52,492
Judy, since when has Andy warhol
become the ship's photographer?
195
00:08:52,573 --> 00:08:54,583
Well, he's going around
the ship taking pictures,
196
00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:57,039
and then he's going to
choose one for the portrait.
197
00:08:57,119 --> 00:08:59,459
Hmm. Interesting.
198
00:08:59,538 --> 00:09:01,248
Excuse me.
199
00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:10,629
Excuse me, Andy,
allow me to introduce myself.
200
00:09:10,716 --> 00:09:12,926
If you don't mind, please.
201
00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:14,680
Certainly.
202
00:09:14,762 --> 00:09:17,812
My name is Isaac Washington,
and I'm the chief barman here,
203
00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:22,350
and I was voted most photogenic
by my high school yearbook.
204
00:09:22,436 --> 00:09:23,516
Hi.
205
00:09:23,604 --> 00:09:25,274
Well, if Andy does
a yearbook,
206
00:09:25,356 --> 00:09:26,606
I'm sure he'll call you.
207
00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:29,687
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
208
00:09:35,574 --> 00:09:38,204
Well, doc told me you got nuts
whenever the auditor
209
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:40,036
came onboard, but I didn't know
it was going to be this bad.
210
00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:41,661
Hey, ace.
211
00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:41,661
Hmm?
212
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:43,577
This guy is rough, all right?
213
00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:45,496
I'm convinced one of his
ancestors was the accountant
214
00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:46,674
for the Spanish inquisition.
215
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:49,672
Here.
216
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:49,672
All righty.
217
00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:50,835
Well...
218
00:09:54,468 --> 00:09:56,178
You find anything yet?
219
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:58,352
Yeah.
Yeah, I found something.
220
00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,351
I found that I'm being paid
221
00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:01,812
half of what the previous
photographer got.
222
00:10:01,892 --> 00:10:02,852
What are you talking about?
223
00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,345
I'm talking about that I also
224
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:08,187
have the honor of being
the lowest-paid crew member.
225
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,364
Hey, wait a minute, you're not
supposed to be looking at this.
226
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,243
I know, but --
227
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,243
this is purser stuff.
228
00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:15,030
I know, but --
229
00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:15,030
do I look at photographer stuff?
230
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,494
Well, no.
231
00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:22,004
Mr. Douglas, sir.
232
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:30,707
I, uh, I trust I'm not too late
to rake you over the coals.
233
00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:32,086
Shall we get started?
234
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:34,593
Well, I better go do
some photographer stuff.
235
00:10:34,675 --> 00:10:35,795
Yes, you better.
236
00:10:34,675 --> 00:10:35,795
Yes, all right.
237
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,545
Thank you.
238
00:10:37,636 --> 00:10:39,426
[ Door closes ]
239
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:49,860
Karen,
it's not here...Anywhere.
240
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:51,900
[ Gasps ]
241
00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:56,954
Where could Jimmy have hidden
a tiny, little stamp?
242
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:59,531
You're sure
this is his room?
243
00:10:59,617 --> 00:11:01,407
Aloha deck 302.
244
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:05,084
I know it's here somewhere,
behind a wall, under a rug,
245
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:06,924
by the pillow.
246
00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:11,207
Here.
247
00:11:11,295 --> 00:11:14,415
[ Both grunting ]
248
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,047
Okay, uh...
249
00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:18,093
Now you're makin' a mess.
250
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:21,307
[ Spitting ]
251
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,096
[ Mutters ]
252
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,274
What?
253
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,274
Something's in here.
254
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,442
What is it?
255
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,442
I got you, got you.
256
00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,811
Hey.
257
00:11:29,897 --> 00:11:32,267
What is it?
258
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:34,858
[ Spitting ]
259
00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:36,704
Oh, my god.
260
00:11:40,908 --> 00:11:45,288
"Inspected by number 19."
261
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:48,581
Well, if the stamp
was in there,
262
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:50,836
number 19's got it.
263
00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:52,498
How does this keep
happening to us?
264
00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:54,166
It's not fair.
265
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:57,425
We knew it was a long shot.
266
00:11:57,508 --> 00:11:59,388
When are we ever
gonna get a break?
267
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:03,391
Honey...
268
00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,677
I'll take care of you.
269
00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:07,597
Oh.
270
00:12:07,685 --> 00:12:10,345
It may not be as good
as it used to be.
271
00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:12,478
I promise I'll
take care of you.
272
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:24,290
Mrs. Hammond, is that you?
273
00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:27,158
Is something wrong?
274
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,406
Want to talk about it?
275
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:32,589
But I just can't.
276
00:12:32,668 --> 00:12:34,378
Mrs. Hammond,
you look so sad.
277
00:12:34,462 --> 00:12:35,672
If you don't talk
to someone,
278
00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:37,764
you're going to ruin
your whole cruise.
279
00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:48,479
You don't know anybody
in Colby, Kansas, do you?
280
00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:51,809
You never planned a visit
to Colby?
281
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:53,896
Or the surrounding
communities of hoxie,
282
00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:55,861
selden, Sharon Springs?
283
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:57,531
Mrs. Hammond, I promise.
284
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,200
The ship never goes
to Kansas, ever.
285
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,738
And you won't breathe
a word of this
286
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:04,661
to anybody,
especially my husband?
287
00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,542
Oh, I've just
got to talk to somebody.
288
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,869
Of course you do.
289
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:12,169
I used to live
in New York City.
290
00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:16,503
Well, we all make mistakes.
291
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:22,224
See, years ago
I got it into my head
292
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:23,761
that I could be an actress,
293
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,604
and I took off for New York,
294
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:28,099
and I was going to be
somebody.
295
00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:29,932
And I got lucky.
296
00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:32,687
Andy warhol discovered me.
297
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:34,440
It was like a dream come true.
298
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:37,072
I changed my name to
Marina del Rey.
299
00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:40,069
Everywhere I went,
I was the center of attention.
300
00:13:40,152 --> 00:13:41,902
Of course, my green hair
might've helped.
301
00:13:41,987 --> 00:13:43,237
Green hair.
302
00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:46,992
I even appeared in one of
Andy's movies --
303
00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:49,536
"white giraffe."
Did you see it?
304
00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,120
No.
305
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:52,745
I saw "white Christmas."
306
00:13:52,831 --> 00:13:57,091
No, bing wouldn't have been
in this one.
307
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:59,709
It was about a bunch
of people who watch TV.
308
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,087
And?
309
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,087
That was it.
310
00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:03,433
They watched TV.
311
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,759
And then on top
of the TV set,
312
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:07,603
there was a statue
of a white giraffe.
313
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,930
You became a star
by watching TV?
314
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:13,636
No, I wasn't the star.
315
00:14:13,727 --> 00:14:15,397
In fact, I didn't come on
until the end,
316
00:14:15,479 --> 00:14:16,729
right after
"the price is right."
317
00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:18,114
Oh.
318
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:21,240
Well, my days with Andy were
fun while they lasted.
319
00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:24,658
Then,
when it stopped being fun,
320
00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:27,988
I just went home to Colby
and married George.
321
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,945
And you never told him that
you'd been in the picture?
322
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:33,616
Oh, no.
He's a really dear, sweet man,
323
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,286
but he's very conservative.
324
00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:37,134
You know that he threw away
his album
325
00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:38,959
of "the sound of music"
when Julie Andrews
326
00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:41,634
took off her blouse
in that move, "s.O.B."?
327
00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:44,634
He'd never, ever understand
my days in New York.
328
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:47,427
Oh, that's
why you've been so upset.
329
00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:49,471
Yes.
George is up for president
330
00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:50,965
of our local rotary.
331
00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:53,556
You might say
it was his life-long dream.
332
00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:55,442
If word got back to Colby
about my past,
333
00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:57,439
he'd just be
a laughingstock.
334
00:14:57,521 --> 00:15:00,981
I don't know what I'd do
if Andy recognized me.
335
00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:02,686
Oh, would you look this way?
336
00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,532
[ Shutter clicks ]
337
00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:08,244
Thank you.
338
00:15:15,414 --> 00:15:17,374
He didn't recognize me.
339
00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:20,168
See? You had nothing
to worry about.
340
00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:22,672
He didn't recognize me.
341
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,715
That's the man
who dyed my hair green.
342
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:27,298
He dressed me in food labels.
343
00:15:27,384 --> 00:15:30,684
He didn't recognize me.
344
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:33,933
Well, maybe you've changed
a little bit since then.
345
00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:37,484
Maybe I've changed too much.
346
00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,617
♪♪
347
00:15:53,994 --> 00:15:56,044
Sorry I'm late.
348
00:15:56,121 --> 00:15:58,081
That's all right, dear.
349
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,376
Ah...
350
00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,565
Mary, what have you
done to yourself?
351
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:29,361
Well, you know, I haven't
changed my hair in 15 years.
352
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:32,446
I -- I just thought it was
time for a change.
353
00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,913
You hate it.
354
00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,913
Oh, no, I don't hate it.
355
00:16:34,993 --> 00:16:37,293
It's just that I'm --
I'm not used to it.
356
00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:38,751
That's all.
357
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,710
Is that all you can say?
358
00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:43,882
Of course not.
359
00:16:43,961 --> 00:16:45,091
Well?
360
00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:49,379
I'll bet that dress
weighs a ton.
361
00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:55,064
Good.
362
00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:55,064
Keep going. Keep going.
363
00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:57,599
Come on. Come on.
Come on.
364
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,563
Hey, wait --
365
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,563
[ cheering ]
366
00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:02,193
[ Cheering continues ]
367
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:07,784
All right, everyone.
Over here, smile.
368
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,110
Come on, kids. Come on,
come on, doctor. Big smile.
369
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,994
That's it, and...
370
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:13,031
[ Shutter clicks ]
371
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:13,031
Got it. [ Laughs ]
372
00:17:13,115 --> 00:17:14,825
That's it, just one?
373
00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:16,448
I only need one.
374
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:18,285
Ha!
Wow, what confidence?
375
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:19,960
I usually have to take a couple
for insurance.
376
00:17:20,038 --> 00:17:20,958
Sometimes I use a whole roll.
377
00:17:21,039 --> 00:17:22,669
Mm, I'm sure.
378
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,877
Ah, great.
379
00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:35,393
Mm-hmm.
380
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:38,141
Oh, good evening
Mr. and Mrs. Cooper.
381
00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,773
Oh.
382
00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,773
Good evening.
383
00:17:39,850 --> 00:17:40,770
How do you like
your new cabin?
384
00:17:40,851 --> 00:17:42,141
Oh, it's lovely.
385
00:17:40,851 --> 00:17:42,141
Good.
386
00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:43,807
Every inch of it.
387
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,306
You say new?
388
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,306
Well, yes.
389
00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:47,567
We totally remodeled
the aloha deck.
390
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:50,279
It took us all a while
to get used to the new numbers.
391
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:51,780
New numbers?
392
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:51,780
Well, sure.
393
00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:53,612
Like, take your cabin
for instance.
394
00:17:53,697 --> 00:17:56,777
It's 302 now, but the old 302
was on the starboard side.
395
00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:58,827
Enjoy your dinner.
396
00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:58,827
Oh.
397
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:04,041
Captain, could we possibly
change to that other cabin, 301?
398
00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:06,044
We had our hearts set on --
on the starboard side.
399
00:18:06,126 --> 00:18:07,286
Starboard.
400
00:18:06,126 --> 00:18:07,286
Yes, well, let's see.
401
00:18:07,377 --> 00:18:08,837
Uh, gopher?
402
00:18:07,377 --> 00:18:08,837
Hmm.
403
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,961
Uh, the coopers
would like to change cabins.
404
00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:12,758
Could you get them to 301?
405
00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:14,841
Uh, no sir, no.
That's Mr. Douglas' cabin.
406
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,507
He's a violent man.
I'm sorry.
407
00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:19,385
Out of the question.
Sorry. Excuse me.
408
00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:21,353
You'll have
to excuse purser Smith.
409
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:22,813
He's under
a lot of pressure.
410
00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:25,313
Numerous v.I.P.S aboard.
411
00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:27,185
Hope he didn't disturb you.
412
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,532
Not at all, right, dear?
413
00:18:29,608 --> 00:18:30,688
No, no -- no sweat.
414
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:32,856
I'm just happy as a clam
to be eating with a knife again.
415
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,605
[ Chuckles ]
416
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,203
You know something, hon?
I'm beginning to like
417
00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:44,537
that new look of yours.
418
00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:46,883
Thank you, George.
You know, I've been thinking.
419
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:50,339
We -- we're just stuck
in a middle-age, middle-class,
420
00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:52,090
middle-American rut.
421
00:18:52,172 --> 00:18:54,012
What do you mean, stuck?
422
00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:56,891
I'm about to become president
of the Colby rotary club,
423
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:59,429
a job not without its perks.
424
00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:02,563
We'll get to sit right up front
at the pancake breakfast.
425
00:19:02,641 --> 00:19:05,391
We never do anything
different.
426
00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:06,937
Oh, now, wait a minute.
427
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:08,400
We're doing something
different right now, aren't we?
428
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:10,070
I mean, we're on this cruise.
429
00:19:10,148 --> 00:19:12,608
That's because you won it
at the office, George.
430
00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,033
If you hadn't sold
the most tractors
431
00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:15,821
of anybody in Colby county,
432
00:19:15,904 --> 00:19:19,074
we'd just have our vacation
like we always do,
433
00:19:19,157 --> 00:19:20,947
crappie fishing
on lake pfister.
434
00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:23,124
Compliments of the captain.
435
00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:23,124
Oh, thank you.
436
00:19:23,203 --> 00:19:25,873
Isn't that nice?
437
00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:27,956
You know something,
sweetheart?
438
00:19:28,041 --> 00:19:29,711
You're right.
We are in a rut.
439
00:19:29,793 --> 00:19:32,303
And starting tonight,
we're breaking out.
440
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:34,759
After dinner, we'll go
dancing, then hit the casino
441
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,090
and take in a movie, huh?
442
00:19:36,174 --> 00:19:38,764
And maybe we'll stay up
for the midnight buffet.
443
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:40,554
And then,
we'll go back to our cabin
444
00:19:40,637 --> 00:19:44,557
and stay up
for the early bird breakfast.
445
00:19:44,641 --> 00:19:47,641
You know what I mean?
Huh?
446
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,768
Oh, George.
447
00:19:49,855 --> 00:19:52,605
Here's to George
and Mary Hammond.
448
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:56,109
Rut busters.
449
00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:02,276
Go get your tools,
and we'll have a look at 301.
450
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:05,747
Karen, there's somebody
in that cabin.
451
00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:08,289
I saw him standing in line
for the 9 o'clock mermaid show.
452
00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:09,963
He'll be gone for an hour.
453
00:20:12,085 --> 00:20:14,835
I know that stamp is in there.
Now, go get your tools.
454
00:20:14,922 --> 00:20:17,132
No, and I'm puttin'
my foot down.
455
00:20:17,215 --> 00:20:19,125
You asked me to help
you look for the stamp.
456
00:20:19,217 --> 00:20:20,297
We looked.
We didn't find it.
457
00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:22,135
Now, let's forget it.
458
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,311
Fine.
459
00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:25,974
I'll do it myself.
460
00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:31,444
Okay. Stand back.
461
00:20:31,521 --> 00:20:33,151
Let a professional do this.
462
00:20:33,231 --> 00:20:35,321
You stood by me
all those years I was in prison.
463
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:36,940
I figure I owe ya.
464
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:42,315
This is a single-cylinder,
cadmium-plated, spring-throw
465
00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:43,577
lock with a half twist.
466
00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:44,829
Can you take it?
467
00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:44,829
Sure, it's open.
468
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:54,341
Four, five.
469
00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:56,549
Gopher.
470
00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:56,549
Six, seven.
471
00:20:56,630 --> 00:20:59,170
Gopher.
472
00:20:56,630 --> 00:20:59,170
Eight, nine. What?
473
00:20:59,257 --> 00:21:01,677
Gopher, I, uh,
474
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,810
I -- I would like to know
why I'm being paid
475
00:21:04,888 --> 00:21:06,348
less than
the last photographer
476
00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,021
and everybody else
in the crew.
477
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,020
Hmm?
478
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,020
Because you are new to the ship,
479
00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:11,812
because you
are new to photography
480
00:21:11,895 --> 00:21:13,685
and because there is
a company policy here
481
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:17,322
that we start new employees
at lower salaries.
482
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:18,531
Now, if you don't mind,
483
00:21:18,610 --> 00:21:21,360
I am fighting for my life
here, all right?
484
00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:24,366
Thirty -- thirty...
485
00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:32,001
One...two...
486
00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:33,172
Hi, ace.
487
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:34,880
Hi.
488
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,090
Why the long face?
489
00:21:36,169 --> 00:21:37,419
It's a family trait.
490
00:21:37,504 --> 00:21:39,384
No, I didn't mean...
491
00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:41,884
Oh, uh, you mean
my expression.
492
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,887
Well, I just found out
that I'm being paid
493
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:46,679
less than the last photographer.
494
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:46,679
You are?
495
00:21:46,763 --> 00:21:47,933
Mm-hmm.
You see, it's --
496
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:50,095
it's company policy
to hire new employees
497
00:21:50,183 --> 00:21:53,023
at a lower salary.
498
00:21:50,183 --> 00:21:53,023
That's strange.
499
00:21:53,103 --> 00:21:56,273
When I was hired, I got paid
the same salary as Julie.
500
00:21:58,775 --> 00:22:00,435
All right. All right.
That's it.
501
00:22:00,527 --> 00:22:02,777
No more Mr. Rich nice guy.
502
00:22:04,990 --> 00:22:07,780
[ Clattering ]
503
00:22:10,203 --> 00:22:13,043
[ Clattering continues ]
504
00:22:13,123 --> 00:22:15,043
Who's in there?
505
00:22:15,125 --> 00:22:18,375
Open up.
506
00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:20,632
Yes?
507
00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:20,632
Who are you,
508
00:22:20,714 --> 00:22:22,554
and what are you doing
in my cabin?
509
00:22:22,632 --> 00:22:24,092
Cleaning lady, night shift.
510
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:25,756
My, you're a messy fellow.
511
00:22:25,844 --> 00:22:27,144
This'll take an hour
to get done.
512
00:22:30,849 --> 00:22:33,559
Why are you wearing a towel
over your head?
513
00:22:33,643 --> 00:22:35,103
Steam cleaning.
514
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,937
Oh, hotter than heck in here.
515
00:22:37,022 --> 00:22:39,822
What I can do for ya?
516
00:22:37,022 --> 00:22:39,822
I left my pipe.
517
00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:41,780
You left your pipe.
518
00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:41,780
Yeah.
519
00:22:41,860 --> 00:22:43,860
Let me go in...
520
00:22:55,290 --> 00:22:56,630
24 black.
521
00:22:56,708 --> 00:22:58,788
[ Both laughing ]
522
00:22:56,708 --> 00:22:58,788
Yippee!
523
00:22:58,877 --> 00:23:01,297
This is fun, isn't this,
sweetheart? Huh?
524
00:23:01,379 --> 00:23:03,839
Oh, you know, it might be
more fun if we bet some money.
525
00:23:03,924 --> 00:23:05,434
We could...
526
00:23:03,924 --> 00:23:05,434
Oh, look at the time.
527
00:23:05,509 --> 00:23:07,139
You know, if we don't hurry,
we're gonna be
528
00:23:07,219 --> 00:23:09,139
late for the movie.
529
00:23:07,219 --> 00:23:09,139
Okay. Uh, what's playing?
530
00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:12,601
Oh, some nature flick
called "white giraffe."
531
00:23:12,682 --> 00:23:15,392
Uh, they say the guy
who made it is on this cruise.
532
00:23:16,770 --> 00:23:18,190
On second thought, George,
I'm tired.
533
00:23:18,271 --> 00:23:19,611
Let's go to bed.
534
00:23:19,689 --> 00:23:21,149
What about rut busting,
535
00:23:21,233 --> 00:23:24,823
kicking up our heels,
being wild and crazy guys?
536
00:23:24,903 --> 00:23:27,573
We can go back to the cabin,
take a nap for 2 hours.
537
00:23:27,656 --> 00:23:29,486
And then,
we can be wild and crazy guys.
538
00:23:29,574 --> 00:23:30,994
Oh, come on, honey.
539
00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:33,496
It's only 10 o'clock.
Let's go to the movie.
540
00:23:34,704 --> 00:23:35,794
19 red.
541
00:23:35,872 --> 00:23:38,042
[ Cheering ]
542
00:23:43,213 --> 00:23:44,843
Come on, George.
We're gonna miss the movie.
543
00:23:44,923 --> 00:23:47,683
Oh, I love nature films.
544
00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:49,849
You remember "born free,"
that Elsa the lion?
545
00:23:49,928 --> 00:23:52,558
What an actress.
546
00:23:52,639 --> 00:23:54,349
Gopher.
547
00:23:52,639 --> 00:23:54,349
What?
548
00:23:54,432 --> 00:23:56,812
Something strange has happened.
549
00:23:54,432 --> 00:23:56,812
What?
550
00:23:56,893 --> 00:23:58,813
Well, someone took one
of the cabins apart,
551
00:23:58,895 --> 00:24:00,105
the lamps, the rug, everything.
552
00:24:00,188 --> 00:24:01,938
You're kidding.
553
00:24:00,188 --> 00:24:01,938
Oh, that's great.
554
00:24:02,023 --> 00:24:04,033
That is all I need.
555
00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:06,239
I got a guy who is
trying to ruin my life
556
00:24:06,319 --> 00:24:07,399
over a butter receipt.
557
00:24:07,487 --> 00:24:08,817
I got a ship full of big shots
558
00:24:08,905 --> 00:24:10,025
that want me to cater
to every one of their whims,
559
00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:12,865
and now -- now I got people
that are tearing their cabins
560
00:24:12,951 --> 00:24:14,371
apart -- that's great.
561
00:24:14,452 --> 00:24:16,372
Whose cabin is it?
562
00:24:16,454 --> 00:24:17,914
Mr. Douglas'.
563
00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:19,288
Uh-oh.
564
00:24:20,959 --> 00:24:22,379
I'm a dead man.
565
00:24:22,460 --> 00:24:25,920
You know they took everything
apart screw by screw?
566
00:24:26,006 --> 00:24:27,376
Wait a minute.
567
00:24:27,465 --> 00:24:29,925
Did they take the air vents
out of the walls?
568
00:24:30,010 --> 00:24:32,890
Yeah.
How did you know?
569
00:24:34,639 --> 00:24:36,059
Hey, gopher, relax.
570
00:24:36,141 --> 00:24:37,931
I know who did this.
571
00:24:48,612 --> 00:24:50,782
Hope you enjoy your day
in cabo San Lucas.
572
00:24:50,864 --> 00:24:53,284
Launches will be
leaving every 15 minutes.
573
00:24:53,366 --> 00:24:56,116
♪♪
574
00:25:16,014 --> 00:25:17,934
Mrs. Hammond.
575
00:25:18,016 --> 00:25:21,266
I saw the movie last night.
I loved your green hair.
576
00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:23,273
You know, the worst part
was having to wear the wax lips
577
00:25:23,355 --> 00:25:26,355
for so long.
578
00:25:26,441 --> 00:25:30,071
Tell me, what did your husband
say about the movie?
579
00:25:30,153 --> 00:25:31,453
Nothing.
580
00:25:31,529 --> 00:25:34,409
He just went back to the cabin
and went to sleep.
581
00:25:34,491 --> 00:25:36,121
Then everything's okay.
582
00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:37,451
No, you don't know George.
583
00:25:37,535 --> 00:25:39,785
When he's mad at me,
that's what he does.
584
00:25:39,871 --> 00:25:41,621
He sleeps.
585
00:25:46,169 --> 00:25:48,799
Well, I'd better take
the giraffe by the horns.
586
00:25:53,551 --> 00:25:55,971
Well, good morning, George.
I didn't want to wake you.
587
00:25:56,054 --> 00:25:57,814
Oh, sorry, I overslept.
588
00:25:57,889 --> 00:25:58,969
Well, that's all right.
589
00:25:59,057 --> 00:26:01,177
Uh, about the movie.
590
00:26:01,268 --> 00:26:03,648
I know, it must have been
a terrible shock to you.
591
00:26:03,728 --> 00:26:05,188
Damn right it was.
592
00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:07,322
I mean, here I was
expecting animals,
593
00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:09,569
and I get some
looney toon picture
594
00:26:09,651 --> 00:26:11,951
about people watching TV.
595
00:26:12,028 --> 00:26:13,658
I didn't know
what I was doing.
596
00:26:13,738 --> 00:26:15,318
Well, of course you did.
597
00:26:15,407 --> 00:26:16,987
You were the one
who didn't want to go.
598
00:26:17,075 --> 00:26:18,485
I should have listened
to you.
599
00:26:18,576 --> 00:26:21,116
Anyhow, I owe you an apology.
600
00:26:21,204 --> 00:26:22,214
You do?
601
00:26:22,289 --> 00:26:23,329
For what?
602
00:26:23,415 --> 00:26:25,995
For falling asleep
at the movie.
603
00:26:26,084 --> 00:26:28,004
I tried to be a wild
and crazy guy,
604
00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:30,006
but I just couldn't
keep my eyes open.
605
00:26:30,088 --> 00:26:32,628
Oh, George,
that's wonderful.
606
00:26:32,716 --> 00:26:34,376
You mean you're not mad
607
00:26:34,467 --> 00:26:36,177
because we didn't stay up
partying all night?
608
00:26:36,261 --> 00:26:39,601
Oh, George,
we can party any night.
609
00:26:39,681 --> 00:26:42,351
And we will,
tonight, I promise.
610
00:26:42,434 --> 00:26:44,024
We'll even stay up
for the midnight buffet.
611
00:26:44,102 --> 00:26:46,192
Oh, George.
612
00:26:46,271 --> 00:26:49,021
You have made me
the happiest woman in the world.
613
00:26:49,107 --> 00:26:50,027
Hmm?
614
00:26:51,860 --> 00:26:55,030
Boy, that must be some buffet.
615
00:26:55,113 --> 00:26:57,873
We looked,
and the stamp wasn't there.
616
00:26:57,949 --> 00:26:59,699
What else can we do?
617
00:26:59,784 --> 00:27:02,334
I suggest you do nothing,
Mr. Cooper.
618
00:27:02,412 --> 00:27:03,752
I'm burl Smith,
the ship's purser.
619
00:27:03,830 --> 00:27:05,330
Okay if I sit down?
620
00:27:05,415 --> 00:27:07,415
Thank you.
621
00:27:07,500 --> 00:27:08,710
Good morning.
622
00:27:08,793 --> 00:27:10,923
Good morning.
623
00:27:08,793 --> 00:27:10,923
Hello.
624
00:27:11,004 --> 00:27:14,054
Someone is making a lot
of trouble on this ship,
625
00:27:14,132 --> 00:27:16,182
and I would like
to help that someone,
626
00:27:16,259 --> 00:27:20,179
like to help that some two,
before it's too late.
627
00:27:20,263 --> 00:27:21,723
Are we communicating here?
628
00:27:21,806 --> 00:27:26,056
Why, whatever do you mean?
629
00:27:26,144 --> 00:27:27,564
He's onto us, Karen.
630
00:27:30,148 --> 00:27:33,438
Let me -- let me try
to explain.
631
00:27:33,526 --> 00:27:35,316
[ Exhales ]
632
00:27:37,113 --> 00:27:40,583
I was a locksmith,
and an honest one.
633
00:27:40,658 --> 00:27:42,578
Seven years ago,
634
00:27:42,660 --> 00:27:45,580
I let a friend of mine
into his office late at night
635
00:27:45,663 --> 00:27:47,583
to get his briefcase.
636
00:27:47,665 --> 00:27:50,085
As it turned out,
it wasn't his briefcase.
637
00:27:50,168 --> 00:27:52,418
Wasn't even his office.
638
00:27:52,504 --> 00:27:54,594
He was using me
to help commit a burglary,
639
00:27:54,672 --> 00:27:57,342
and we were both
sent to prison.
640
00:27:57,425 --> 00:27:59,135
What's that got to do
with this ship?
641
00:27:59,219 --> 00:28:01,809
While I was in prison,
642
00:28:01,888 --> 00:28:05,428
my cellmate was a guy
named Jimmy briscoe.
643
00:28:05,517 --> 00:28:09,437
He was in for stealing
the rarest stamp in the world.
644
00:28:09,521 --> 00:28:14,281
An 1856 British guiana
worth $2 million.
645
00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:18,069
Jimmy was trying to make
his getaway onboard this ship,
646
00:28:18,154 --> 00:28:20,954
but the cops picked him up
in Mexico.
647
00:28:21,032 --> 00:28:23,582
So he hid the stamp
here on the Princess.
648
00:28:23,660 --> 00:28:25,790
Right. We wanted
to find the stamp
649
00:28:25,870 --> 00:28:30,500
and claim the insurance
company reward, $75,000.
650
00:28:30,583 --> 00:28:32,753
So you tore the cabin apart.
651
00:28:32,836 --> 00:28:34,296
No, uh,
it was all my fault.
652
00:28:34,379 --> 00:28:38,429
I -- we wanted to get
a little house again,
653
00:28:38,508 --> 00:28:41,138
one with a garden.
654
00:28:41,219 --> 00:28:44,099
When I went to prison,
we lost our -- our home.
655
00:28:44,180 --> 00:28:46,980
We lost everything.
656
00:28:44,180 --> 00:28:46,980
Yeah. It was everything.
657
00:28:47,058 --> 00:28:48,268
But you didn't find
the stamp.
658
00:28:51,062 --> 00:28:52,692
Okay, look,
659
00:28:52,772 --> 00:28:55,282
I don't think
you mean any harm.
660
00:28:55,358 --> 00:28:56,938
But no more breaking
and entering,
661
00:28:57,026 --> 00:28:58,486
all right?
662
00:28:57,026 --> 00:28:58,486
No --
663
00:28:58,570 --> 00:29:00,950
oh, oh, you -- you have --
you have our word, right, Karen?
664
00:29:01,030 --> 00:29:02,950
I promise.
665
00:29:03,032 --> 00:29:05,702
Because a stamp that small
666
00:29:05,785 --> 00:29:08,455
on a ship this big
could be anywhere.
667
00:29:17,755 --> 00:29:19,165
[ Knock on door ]
668
00:29:24,387 --> 00:29:26,177
Hi, Marina.
669
00:29:39,194 --> 00:29:39,784
♪♪
670
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,700
We hope you enjoyed your day
in cabo San Lucas,
671
00:29:42,780 --> 00:29:44,070
and we invite you to join us
672
00:29:44,157 --> 00:29:45,697
in the international
lounge tonight
673
00:29:45,783 --> 00:29:47,703
for the 200th cruise
celebration.
674
00:29:47,785 --> 00:29:49,325
There will be
a special performance
675
00:29:49,412 --> 00:29:51,872
by our love boat mermaids
and dancing till dawn
676
00:29:51,956 --> 00:29:53,826
to the music of Peter duchin.
677
00:29:53,917 --> 00:29:55,587
I'm feeling guilty
for bringing up
678
00:29:55,668 --> 00:29:58,668
this whole salary thing.
679
00:29:55,668 --> 00:29:58,668
But why?
680
00:29:58,755 --> 00:30:00,715
Your salary shouldn't be based
on whether you're a man
681
00:30:00,798 --> 00:30:02,338
or a woman...
682
00:30:00,798 --> 00:30:02,338
Mm-hmm.
683
00:30:02,425 --> 00:30:07,255
Black or white, young or old,
poor or filthy rich.
684
00:30:07,347 --> 00:30:09,057
Well, you're right,
equal pay for equal work.
685
00:30:09,140 --> 00:30:10,600
You guys make
the same salary.
686
00:30:10,683 --> 00:30:11,733
We do?
687
00:30:11,809 --> 00:30:14,189
Mm-hmm.
688
00:30:14,270 --> 00:30:16,230
But I've been working here
for eight years.
689
00:30:16,314 --> 00:30:18,904
Well, that's true, Isaac,
but I am cruise director.
690
00:30:18,983 --> 00:30:20,403
Well, she's got
a point there.
691
00:30:20,485 --> 00:30:23,275
But still, I've been
working here for eight years.
692
00:30:23,363 --> 00:30:24,573
I -- I don't think
it's how long you've been here.
693
00:30:24,656 --> 00:30:26,366
It's what job you do.
694
00:30:26,449 --> 00:30:28,539
That would explain why doc makes
five times more than we do.
695
00:30:28,618 --> 00:30:30,118
Five times?
696
00:30:30,203 --> 00:30:31,583
Mm-hmm.
697
00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:33,583
I loaned that guy 20 bucks
last week,
698
00:30:33,665 --> 00:30:35,415
and he still hasn't paid
me back.
699
00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,540
So, Isaac, do you think
I should pursue the salary raise
700
00:30:37,627 --> 00:30:38,547
as a matter of principle?
701
00:30:38,628 --> 00:30:40,258
Who cares?
702
00:30:40,338 --> 00:30:41,708
Anybody that makes that kind
of money should be able
703
00:30:41,798 --> 00:30:43,588
to pay their debts.
704
00:30:43,675 --> 00:30:46,505
And a joyous good evening
to you all.
705
00:30:46,594 --> 00:30:49,934
Talk is cheap --
and so are you.
706
00:30:55,478 --> 00:30:58,438
♪♪
707
00:31:04,821 --> 00:31:06,451
It's a pretty big place.
Where do you want to start?
708
00:31:06,531 --> 00:31:10,291
Didn't you tell me Jimmy
liked to hit on showgirls?
709
00:31:10,368 --> 00:31:11,578
Yeah.
710
00:31:11,661 --> 00:31:13,121
He spent so much time
backstage,
711
00:31:13,204 --> 00:31:14,964
the dancers wanted to
throw him overboard.
712
00:31:15,039 --> 00:31:16,789
Backstage.
That's where I'll start.
713
00:31:16,874 --> 00:31:18,634
You check around here.
714
00:31:16,874 --> 00:31:18,634
Okay.
715
00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:19,840
Good evening.
716
00:31:19,919 --> 00:31:20,919
Enjoy the show.
717
00:31:19,919 --> 00:31:20,919
Hello.
718
00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,014
A-ha.
719
00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,014
How are you?
720
00:31:22,088 --> 00:31:24,008
[ Indistinct conversations ]
721
00:31:24,090 --> 00:31:26,010
[ Instruments tuning ]
722
00:31:35,727 --> 00:31:39,107
[ Band playing intro ]
723
00:31:39,188 --> 00:31:41,068
Don't mind me.
Stage inspector.
724
00:31:41,149 --> 00:31:42,819
[ Applause ]
725
00:31:41,149 --> 00:31:42,819
Thank you.
726
00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:46,990
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
to a very special evening.
727
00:31:47,071 --> 00:31:50,371
As we look back over the many
voyages of the pacific Princess,
728
00:31:50,450 --> 00:31:53,790
we feel fortunate
to have crossed so many lives
729
00:31:53,870 --> 00:31:56,250
and touched so many hearts,
730
00:31:56,331 --> 00:31:58,211
and we look forward
to many more reunions
731
00:31:58,291 --> 00:31:59,671
like this one.
732
00:32:03,755 --> 00:32:06,505
Like any other family,
we've grown a lot,
733
00:32:06,591 --> 00:32:09,551
and to help us celebrate
this 200th cruise,
734
00:32:09,636 --> 00:32:12,306
we're proud to present
our newest additions.
735
00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:15,178
Ladies and gentlemen,
the mermaids.
736
00:32:15,266 --> 00:32:16,676
[ Applause ]
737
00:32:16,768 --> 00:32:20,648
[ Dance music playing ]
738
00:32:20,730 --> 00:32:23,230
♪ Party ♪
739
00:32:23,316 --> 00:32:24,976
♪ we're going to celebrate ♪
740
00:32:28,154 --> 00:32:29,914
♪ tonight ♪
741
00:32:31,866 --> 00:32:34,696
♪ tonight's the night we're
gonna make it happen ♪
742
00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:36,536
♪ make it happen ♪
743
00:32:36,621 --> 00:32:41,001
♪ tonight we'll put
all other things aside ♪
744
00:32:41,084 --> 00:32:43,844
♪ we shouldn't even
think about tomorrow ♪
745
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,550
♪ no, no, no, no, no ♪
746
00:32:45,630 --> 00:32:49,880
♪ sweet memories will last
a long, long time ♪
747
00:32:49,967 --> 00:32:53,047
♪ I want to love you,
feel you ♪
748
00:32:53,137 --> 00:32:56,387
♪ wrap myself around you,
I want to squeeze you ♪
749
00:32:56,474 --> 00:32:57,524
♪ please you ♪
750
00:32:57,600 --> 00:32:59,190
♪ I just can't get enough ♪
751
00:32:59,268 --> 00:33:01,398
♪ and if you move real slow ♪
752
00:33:01,479 --> 00:33:03,729
♪ I'll let it go ♪
753
00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:05,935
♪ I'm so excited ♪
754
00:33:06,025 --> 00:33:09,025
♪ and I just can't hide it ♪
755
00:33:09,112 --> 00:33:10,702
♪ I'm about to lose control ♪
756
00:33:10,780 --> 00:33:13,370
♪ and I think I like it ♪
757
00:33:13,449 --> 00:33:18,659
♪ I'm so excited
and I just can't hide it ♪
758
00:33:18,746 --> 00:33:20,616
♪ and I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know ♪
759
00:33:20,707 --> 00:33:22,537
♪ I like it, I like it ♪
760
00:33:51,904 --> 00:33:53,954
♪ Look what you do to me ♪
761
00:33:54,031 --> 00:33:56,121
♪ you got me burnin' up ♪
762
00:33:56,200 --> 00:34:00,080
♪ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
763
00:34:00,163 --> 00:34:02,423
♪ I'm so excited ♪
764
00:34:00,163 --> 00:34:02,423
♪ I think you get it ♪
765
00:34:02,498 --> 00:34:03,748
♪ and I just can't hide it ♪
766
00:34:03,833 --> 00:34:05,293
♪ I've got to give it up ♪
767
00:34:05,376 --> 00:34:06,916
♪ I'm about to lose control ♪
768
00:34:07,003 --> 00:34:09,093
♪ and I think I like it ♪
769
00:34:09,172 --> 00:34:10,302
♪ I'm so excited ♪
770
00:34:10,381 --> 00:34:11,801
♪ look what you do to me ♪
771
00:34:11,883 --> 00:34:12,973
♪ and I just can't hide it ♪
772
00:34:13,050 --> 00:34:14,840
♪ you've got me burnin' up ♪
773
00:34:14,927 --> 00:34:16,927
♪ and I know, I know ♪
774
00:34:17,013 --> 00:34:19,473
♪ I know, I know ♪
775
00:34:19,557 --> 00:34:21,847
♪ I know, I know ♪
776
00:34:23,895 --> 00:34:24,805
♪ I like it ♪
777
00:34:24,896 --> 00:34:26,146
[ Song ends ]
778
00:34:26,230 --> 00:34:28,110
[ Cheers and applause ]
779
00:34:34,405 --> 00:34:37,025
[ Cheering continues ]
780
00:34:41,746 --> 00:34:42,656
Oh...
781
00:34:44,081 --> 00:34:46,041
[ Clamoring, gasping ]
782
00:34:53,424 --> 00:34:55,014
Oh, my...
783
00:34:57,929 --> 00:35:01,679
I must say, I never anticipated
seeing anyone in a few seconds
784
00:35:01,766 --> 00:35:04,386
destroy something that took us
weeks to construct.
785
00:35:04,477 --> 00:35:07,357
And just for a postage stamp.
786
00:35:07,438 --> 00:35:09,648
I also understand
that you are the couple
787
00:35:09,732 --> 00:35:12,492
who dismantled
Mr. Douglas' stateroom.
788
00:35:12,568 --> 00:35:14,238
I had to tell him.
He's the captain.
789
00:35:15,905 --> 00:35:18,025
Yes.
790
00:35:18,115 --> 00:35:20,025
We confess.
We're the ones.
791
00:35:20,117 --> 00:35:23,037
It -- it was all my idea.
792
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:26,870
If anybody has to go to jail,
please let it be me.
793
00:35:26,958 --> 00:35:28,498
No one is going to jail,
Mrs. Cooper.
794
00:35:28,584 --> 00:35:29,674
Oh...
795
00:35:29,752 --> 00:35:32,712
Because no one
is pressing charges.
796
00:35:32,797 --> 00:35:36,757
Purser Smith seems to feel
you didn't mean any harm.
797
00:35:36,843 --> 00:35:38,893
However...
798
00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:40,720
I may be taking your name
799
00:35:40,805 --> 00:35:43,015
off the free cruise for life
drawing.
800
00:35:47,311 --> 00:35:49,441
We kept our promise.
801
00:35:49,522 --> 00:35:52,402
We didn't break and enter.
802
00:35:52,483 --> 00:35:54,743
More like search
and destroy, sir.
803
00:35:54,819 --> 00:35:56,699
And all for nothing.
804
00:35:56,779 --> 00:35:59,569
$75,000 dollar reward
is not nothing.
805
00:35:59,657 --> 00:36:03,197
The 1856 penny stamp
806
00:36:03,286 --> 00:36:06,616
was found during one
of our remodeling stopovers.
807
00:36:06,706 --> 00:36:08,456
It was?
808
00:36:06,706 --> 00:36:08,456
It was?
809
00:36:08,541 --> 00:36:11,921
But Jimmy gave me
this clipping.
810
00:36:12,003 --> 00:36:14,463
It says the insurance company
is offering the reward.
811
00:36:19,010 --> 00:36:20,760
That article
is two years old.
812
00:36:20,845 --> 00:36:23,095
That's right.
813
00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:26,061
We found the stamp last year.
814
00:36:26,142 --> 00:36:28,902
The insurance company
insisted on no publicity.
815
00:36:31,230 --> 00:36:32,440
Well...
816
00:36:33,649 --> 00:36:36,899
I guess that's that.
817
00:36:36,986 --> 00:36:39,606
Now I'm going
to enjoy my party.
818
00:36:39,697 --> 00:36:42,737
[ Soft music playing ]
819
00:36:46,704 --> 00:36:49,294
♪♪
820
00:36:56,505 --> 00:36:58,665
[ Indistinct conversations ]
821
00:37:02,386 --> 00:37:05,426
So I convinced Mary to tell
George the truth about her past.
822
00:37:05,514 --> 00:37:07,144
Hmm.
823
00:37:07,224 --> 00:37:09,314
Well, it looks like
he took it pretty well.
824
00:37:09,393 --> 00:37:10,483
What?
825
00:37:10,561 --> 00:37:13,311
You were one of those?
826
00:37:13,397 --> 00:37:15,147
With green hair?
827
00:37:15,232 --> 00:37:18,492
Well, honey, it was more of
a, like, a minty moss.
828
00:37:18,569 --> 00:37:20,819
From a distance
it looked almost blonde.
829
00:37:20,905 --> 00:37:22,445
And he wants to paint
your picture?
830
00:37:22,531 --> 00:37:24,491
Ha ha ha!
Over my dead body.
831
00:37:24,575 --> 00:37:26,825
Well, honey, you know,
this is a really big event.
832
00:37:26,911 --> 00:37:28,831
It's going to be in the paper
and everything.
833
00:37:28,913 --> 00:37:31,333
I look on it
as a real big honor.
834
00:37:31,415 --> 00:37:33,785
And I look on it
as a disgrace.
835
00:37:33,876 --> 00:37:36,416
No way a wife of mine is going
to have a picture painted by --
836
00:37:36,504 --> 00:37:39,344
by that New York flake-ball.
837
00:37:39,423 --> 00:37:41,843
I can just imagine what
the folks back home would say,
838
00:37:41,926 --> 00:37:44,216
and how are you going to
explain this to our son, huh?
839
00:37:44,303 --> 00:37:46,473
Well, I'm sure Chuck
will understand.
840
00:37:46,555 --> 00:37:49,135
Your reputation
will be ruined.
841
00:37:49,225 --> 00:37:51,805
Don't you mean your reputation
will be ruined?
842
00:37:54,855 --> 00:37:56,185
I was right about you, George!
843
00:37:56,273 --> 00:37:58,993
You're nothing but
a narrow-minded stuffed shirt!
844
00:38:11,747 --> 00:38:14,747
[ Indistinct conversations ]
845
00:38:16,293 --> 00:38:17,503
Excuse me.
846
00:38:17,586 --> 00:38:18,666
Can I talk --
847
00:38:17,586 --> 00:38:18,666
excuse me.
848
00:38:18,754 --> 00:38:19,594
Thanks.
849
00:38:21,674 --> 00:38:23,724
Excuse me.
Did you get a chance
850
00:38:23,801 --> 00:38:26,511
to show Mr. Warhol,
uh, my photographs?
851
00:38:26,595 --> 00:38:28,425
Oh, yes, he took a look.
852
00:38:28,514 --> 00:38:30,894
Well, what'd he say?
853
00:38:30,975 --> 00:38:33,095
Well, I think he said
that your photography
854
00:38:33,185 --> 00:38:36,225
was the essence
of crass commercialism.
855
00:38:36,313 --> 00:38:37,903
Oh.
He didn't like them.
856
00:38:37,982 --> 00:38:39,532
Oh, on the contrary,
dear boy.
857
00:38:39,608 --> 00:38:41,438
He loves
crass commercialism.
858
00:38:41,527 --> 00:38:42,527
As a matter of fact,
he said,
859
00:38:42,611 --> 00:38:45,201
"that's what makes america
great."
860
00:38:45,281 --> 00:38:47,411
That's great.
Wait until gopher hears that.
861
00:38:47,491 --> 00:38:50,081
Uh, hey, thanks,
Mr. Warhol.
862
00:38:50,161 --> 00:38:53,501
Crass and commercial.
That ought to be worth a raise.
863
00:38:56,709 --> 00:38:59,169
Uh, could I talk to you,
Mr. Warhol?
864
00:38:59,253 --> 00:39:01,303
Excuse us.
865
00:39:01,380 --> 00:39:03,970
Uh, Mr. Warhol,
I'm Mary's husband.
866
00:39:04,050 --> 00:39:05,800
Mary?
867
00:39:05,885 --> 00:39:07,965
Marina del Rey.
868
00:39:05,885 --> 00:39:07,965
Oh.
869
00:39:08,054 --> 00:39:10,604
Mary tells me that you want
to paint her picture.
870
00:39:10,681 --> 00:39:12,981
Well, that's impossible.
871
00:39:13,059 --> 00:39:15,849
Uh, it's nothing personal,
Mr. Warhol, it's --
872
00:39:15,936 --> 00:39:18,306
it's just that we come
from two different worlds,
873
00:39:18,397 --> 00:39:19,937
and don't get me wrong.
874
00:39:20,024 --> 00:39:21,824
I'm flexible.
875
00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:24,901
I mean, I could even go
for something like that.
876
00:39:24,987 --> 00:39:26,447
If you could do that sort
of thing,
877
00:39:26,530 --> 00:39:27,950
it would be a different story.
878
00:39:28,032 --> 00:39:29,742
Well, that's mine.
879
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:33,580
No kidding.
880
00:39:33,662 --> 00:39:34,792
That's good.
881
00:39:34,872 --> 00:39:36,622
Thanks.
882
00:39:40,878 --> 00:39:43,128
Hope you can get in
a little bit of the party, sir.
883
00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:48,094
Mr. Smith, you know
why I haven't retired yet?
884
00:39:48,177 --> 00:39:50,137
Wife doesn't want you
sitting around the house?
885
00:39:50,221 --> 00:39:51,811
Wrong, Mr. Smith.
886
00:39:51,889 --> 00:39:54,309
I haven't retired
because I keep telling myself
887
00:39:54,391 --> 00:39:56,101
that your next audit
will be the one
888
00:39:56,185 --> 00:39:58,145
where I nail you to the deck.
889
00:40:00,606 --> 00:40:04,276
I think my dream, uh,
has come true.
890
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:05,360
Okay.
891
00:40:05,444 --> 00:40:06,994
I confess.
892
00:40:07,071 --> 00:40:09,121
I tried to be a nice guy
and throw a birthday party
893
00:40:09,198 --> 00:40:10,068
for my pal, Isaac,
894
00:40:10,157 --> 00:40:12,487
and I spilled some champagne
on a receipt,
895
00:40:12,576 --> 00:40:14,326
and I left it out to dry,
896
00:40:14,411 --> 00:40:18,291
and now that is why I cannot
account for a ton of butter,
897
00:40:18,374 --> 00:40:20,134
and now you can retire,
898
00:40:20,209 --> 00:40:21,709
and I can be fired.
There.
899
00:40:21,794 --> 00:40:23,134
You happy now?
900
00:40:23,212 --> 00:40:25,172
Butter receipt?
901
00:40:25,256 --> 00:40:27,006
Are you, uh, are you
referring to this
902
00:40:27,091 --> 00:40:29,051
piece of paper reeking
of...
903
00:40:29,135 --> 00:40:32,175
[ Sniffs ]
...Dom perignon?
904
00:40:32,263 --> 00:40:33,893
This was filed under "s."
905
00:40:33,973 --> 00:40:36,643
That's what I did! I filed it
under "s" for spread.
906
00:40:36,725 --> 00:40:37,595
Spread?
907
00:40:37,685 --> 00:40:41,935
That's what I did,
and now I'm off the hook.
908
00:40:42,022 --> 00:40:43,402
Wrong, Mr. Smith.
909
00:40:43,482 --> 00:40:45,322
There is still
that one omission.
910
00:40:45,401 --> 00:40:48,031
Sir?
911
00:40:45,401 --> 00:40:48,031
You forgot to sign your report.
912
00:40:48,112 --> 00:40:50,202
Now, if there's one thing
that I cannot stand
913
00:40:50,281 --> 00:40:52,201
is that kind of stupidity.
914
00:40:52,283 --> 00:40:54,033
It will not go unnoticed.
915
00:40:54,118 --> 00:40:55,738
My humble apologies, sir.
916
00:40:57,955 --> 00:40:58,905
Sign.
917
00:40:58,998 --> 00:41:00,538
Yes, sir.
918
00:41:07,965 --> 00:41:11,085
Mary.
919
00:41:11,177 --> 00:41:15,057
I, uh, I've been acting
like a jackass.
920
00:41:15,139 --> 00:41:17,809
I'm sorry.
921
00:41:17,892 --> 00:41:22,192
Oh, George, I know how hard
this has been on you.
922
00:41:22,271 --> 00:41:24,191
Listen, Mary...
923
00:41:26,650 --> 00:41:31,110
I told Mr. Warhol that he
couldn't paint your portrait,
924
00:41:31,197 --> 00:41:33,697
and then I got to see some of
the other work that he's done,
925
00:41:33,782 --> 00:41:36,582
and I started thinking,
926
00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:37,750
well, normal Rockwell
is dead,
927
00:41:37,828 --> 00:41:39,498
and he's probably
the only other guy
928
00:41:39,580 --> 00:41:41,710
who can do you justice.
929
00:41:41,790 --> 00:41:44,460
Well,
what will the rotary think?
930
00:41:44,543 --> 00:41:46,053
Well, Fritz allenson's wife
931
00:41:46,128 --> 00:41:49,588
once posed for an auto parts
ad in a swimsuit,
932
00:41:49,673 --> 00:41:51,553
and, uh, he served two terms
of office,
933
00:41:51,634 --> 00:41:54,434
so I'll take the gamble.
934
00:41:54,511 --> 00:41:57,391
Oh, George.
935
00:41:57,473 --> 00:41:59,273
I have another confession
to make.
936
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:01,890
Oh, Mary, please.
937
00:42:01,977 --> 00:42:04,977
I am just so glad I married you.
938
00:42:05,064 --> 00:42:07,234
Oh... [ chuckles ]
939
00:42:08,192 --> 00:42:09,782
Mm.
940
00:42:08,192 --> 00:42:09,782
Come on.
941
00:42:09,860 --> 00:42:11,400
Let's get back
to the party, huh?
942
00:42:12,696 --> 00:42:17,616
[ Soft music playing ]
943
00:42:22,039 --> 00:42:25,459
Trip's almost over,
and what have we got?
944
00:42:25,542 --> 00:42:27,172
No stamp.
945
00:42:27,253 --> 00:42:29,133
No money.
946
00:42:29,213 --> 00:42:30,633
No nothin'.
947
00:42:30,714 --> 00:42:33,804
We'll be all right.
948
00:42:33,884 --> 00:42:36,014
I wanted you
to have a garden.
949
00:42:36,095 --> 00:42:37,345
We'll get a window box.
950
00:42:37,429 --> 00:42:40,429
[ Both laugh ]
951
00:42:40,516 --> 00:42:42,766
Just like when we started out,
huh, kid?
952
00:42:42,851 --> 00:42:44,311
Broke but happy.
953
00:42:44,395 --> 00:42:47,145
Broke but happy.
954
00:42:47,231 --> 00:42:48,901
Hey.
955
00:42:48,983 --> 00:42:52,493
Listen to what the duchin
boy's playing.
956
00:42:52,569 --> 00:42:57,489
♪ There's a small hotel ♪
957
00:42:57,574 --> 00:43:00,794
♪ by a wishing well ♪
958
00:43:00,869 --> 00:43:04,789
♪ I wish that we were there ♪
959
00:43:04,873 --> 00:43:08,593
♪ together ♪
960
00:43:12,256 --> 00:43:13,836
If I did have a wishing well,
you know what I'd wish for?
961
00:43:13,924 --> 00:43:15,384
Hmm?
962
00:43:15,467 --> 00:43:17,507
Nothing.
963
00:43:17,594 --> 00:43:19,854
I have everything I want.
964
00:43:23,892 --> 00:43:27,692
♪♪
965
00:43:56,467 --> 00:43:59,347
Hey!
966
00:43:56,467 --> 00:43:59,347
Hey.
967
00:43:59,428 --> 00:44:00,388
Purser Smith...
968
00:44:00,471 --> 00:44:02,391
Hey.
Whoa, whoa, purser Smith?
969
00:44:02,473 --> 00:44:03,853
Wait a minute. Hey.
970
00:44:03,932 --> 00:44:06,062
What's this purser Smith
stuff?
971
00:44:06,143 --> 00:44:08,693
It's your old buddy
gopher right here.
972
00:44:08,771 --> 00:44:10,901
Okay.
Okay, old buddy gopher.
973
00:44:10,981 --> 00:44:12,691
I've given this a lot
of thought,
974
00:44:12,775 --> 00:44:13,935
and I feel that it's only fair
975
00:44:14,026 --> 00:44:16,896
that I receive the same salary
as the previous photographer.
976
00:44:16,987 --> 00:44:20,277
You got it. Starting today,
you receive the same salary
977
00:44:20,366 --> 00:44:22,406
as the previous photographer.
978
00:44:22,493 --> 00:44:24,913
Well, since you're
in such a generous mood...
979
00:44:24,995 --> 00:44:26,455
Isaac.
980
00:44:26,538 --> 00:44:29,248
Gopher, I would like to say
that I feel Isaac here also
981
00:44:29,333 --> 00:44:32,423
deserves a higher salary in view
of his outstanding service
982
00:44:32,503 --> 00:44:34,423
during the past 8 years.
983
00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:35,755
Thank you, Judy.
984
00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:35,755
Way to go.
985
00:44:35,839 --> 00:44:38,589
Judy, that's a good point.
986
00:44:38,675 --> 00:44:40,425
Isaac, this afternoon,
987
00:44:40,511 --> 00:44:44,311
we will meet and go over the
entire salary situation, okay?
988
00:44:44,390 --> 00:44:48,390
Because I love a happy crew,
okay?
989
00:44:48,477 --> 00:44:50,307
[ Laughing ]
990
00:44:50,396 --> 00:44:52,606
[ Door opens, closes ]
991
00:44:52,689 --> 00:44:54,359
Maybe I should have asked
for a new camera.
992
00:44:56,193 --> 00:44:57,823
[ Knock on door ]
993
00:44:56,193 --> 00:44:57,823
Yes?
994
00:44:57,903 --> 00:44:58,823
30 minutes to port, sir.
995
00:44:58,904 --> 00:45:00,954
Oh, thank you, gopher.
996
00:45:01,031 --> 00:45:02,571
Doing some research?
997
00:45:02,658 --> 00:45:04,118
Yes.
998
00:45:04,201 --> 00:45:05,991
I was curious
about that 1-penny stamp.
999
00:45:06,078 --> 00:45:07,578
Do you realize
that it tripled in value
1000
00:45:07,663 --> 00:45:09,623
over the last few years?
1001
00:45:07,663 --> 00:45:09,623
Wow.
1002
00:45:09,706 --> 00:45:13,496
Just imagine
if it were a 2-penny stamp.
1003
00:45:13,585 --> 00:45:16,625
Million dollar stamp recovered
aboard pacific Princess.
1004
00:45:18,882 --> 00:45:22,302
I'm sure the line
would've loved the publicity
1005
00:45:22,386 --> 00:45:25,466
if the stamp
had ever been found.
1006
00:45:25,556 --> 00:45:27,766
What do you mean?
1007
00:45:27,850 --> 00:45:30,140
I had to stop the coopers
from tearing the ship apart
1008
00:45:30,227 --> 00:45:32,147
in the middle
of our anniversary cruise,
1009
00:45:32,229 --> 00:45:34,519
so I told them
a little white lie.
1010
00:45:34,606 --> 00:45:37,276
That stamp could be anywhere.
1011
00:45:37,359 --> 00:45:39,989
Well, going up to the bridge.
1012
00:45:41,572 --> 00:45:44,742
[ Door opens, closes ]
1013
00:45:46,034 --> 00:45:47,744
Could be anywhere?
1014
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:07,007
And I just wanna say how honored
I am that you chose my wife,
1015
00:46:07,097 --> 00:46:09,177
Mary, to be the subject
of your portrait.
1016
00:46:09,266 --> 00:46:12,056
Maybe you two would like to get
together with us here in L.A.
1017
00:46:12,144 --> 00:46:13,234
Oh, Andy, we can't.
1018
00:46:13,312 --> 00:46:15,312
We're not
getting off the ship.
1019
00:46:15,397 --> 00:46:18,027
We've booked passage
on the very next cruise.
1020
00:46:18,108 --> 00:46:19,988
But you've already seen
the sights.
1021
00:46:20,068 --> 00:46:21,528
Hardly be worth getting
out of bed.
1022
00:46:21,612 --> 00:46:23,412
Exactly.
1023
00:46:24,323 --> 00:46:25,953
[ Laughs ]
1024
00:46:31,747 --> 00:46:33,367
Mr. Douglas, sir.
1025
00:46:31,747 --> 00:46:33,367
Yeah.
1026
00:46:33,457 --> 00:46:36,587
Little something in honor
of your retirement, sir.
1027
00:46:36,668 --> 00:46:37,918
You've got to be kidding.
1028
00:46:38,003 --> 00:46:39,963
I'm not gonna be retire.
1029
00:46:40,047 --> 00:46:41,047
What could be more fun
1030
00:46:41,131 --> 00:46:44,551
than watching
you fight for your life?
1031
00:46:44,635 --> 00:46:45,715
Thank you, sir,
for your honesty.
1032
00:46:45,802 --> 00:46:46,892
You're welcome.
1033
00:46:46,970 --> 00:46:50,520
So, until the next time.
1034
00:47:03,111 --> 00:47:07,071
There it is, the end
of the rainbow.
1035
00:47:07,157 --> 00:47:11,247
Not a pot of gold in sight.
1036
00:47:11,328 --> 00:47:12,578
There's the cabin
1037
00:47:12,663 --> 00:47:15,423
where you played wrecking crew
with the plumbing.
1038
00:47:15,499 --> 00:47:17,289
Somewhere in there,
there's a nightclub.
1039
00:47:17,376 --> 00:47:19,916
You put on a great show, kid.
1040
00:47:17,376 --> 00:47:19,916
Yeah. [ Laughs ]
1041
00:47:20,003 --> 00:47:23,593
Well, if that stamp
were on this ship,
1042
00:47:23,674 --> 00:47:25,304
we would've found it.
1043
00:47:23,674 --> 00:47:25,304
Yeah.
1044
00:47:26,677 --> 00:47:29,047
Larry.
1045
00:47:26,677 --> 00:47:29,047
Hmm?
1046
00:47:29,137 --> 00:47:30,257
The flags.
1047
00:47:30,347 --> 00:47:32,267
The flags.
1048
00:47:32,349 --> 00:47:34,269
Captain!
1049
00:47:34,351 --> 00:47:35,521
Captain!
1050
00:47:37,354 --> 00:47:39,114
Jimmy hid the stamp
in the picture!
1051
00:47:39,189 --> 00:47:41,109
We're rich!
Oh, captain, we're rich!
1052
00:47:41,191 --> 00:47:42,111
We're rich!
1053
00:47:42,192 --> 00:47:45,742
Wait a minute.
You said the stamp was found.
1054
00:47:45,821 --> 00:47:47,951
Well, uh, now it has been.
1055
00:47:45,821 --> 00:47:47,951
Oh!
1056
00:47:48,031 --> 00:47:49,661
Say, listen, why don't we
take this down
1057
00:47:49,741 --> 00:47:50,661
so you can collect your money?
1058
00:47:49,741 --> 00:47:50,661
Yeah.
1059
00:47:50,742 --> 00:47:51,792
Yeah.
1060
00:47:50,742 --> 00:47:51,792
Yeah.
1061
00:48:03,380 --> 00:48:06,220
♪♪
1062
00:48:06,270 --> 00:48:10,820
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