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1
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:31,735
Shit!
2
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,232
Hold the doors!
3
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:13,068
Hold the doors!
4
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:46,727
Gags
5
00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:17,799
He should be here somewhere.
6
00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:20,802
Yes, this is probably the only place
in the college where one will find him.
7
00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:24,598
Gardner, JK.
8
00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:40,739
Good morning.
9
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:47,662
Oh, can I help you?
10
00:04:48,038 --> 00:04:51,625
Well, it's my tutorial. On Wordsworth.
"The Prelude."
11
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,544
Oh, no, I can't give tutorials
12
00:04:54,544 --> 00:04:56,505
in the first week after the break,
I'm afraid.
13
00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:57,756
Too much administration.
14
00:04:57,756 --> 00:04:59,466
Oh. When should I come, then?
15
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,260
Come at the same hour
of the same day of next week.
16
00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:04,054
-Next week?
-Next week, yes.
17
00:05:04,054 --> 00:05:07,307
If we keep to our timetable,
we'll' know where we are, won't we? Right.
18
00:05:40,549 --> 00:05:41,550
Good morning.
19
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,387
-Nice to see you.
-Nice to be seen.
20
00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:47,347
What's the matter with your chin?
21
00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:50,475
I'm trying to cultivate cotton wool on it.
22
00:05:52,644 --> 00:05:55,689
Your own is shining pleasantly.
What did you have to work with?
23
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:57,691
A razor?
24
00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:58,650
What did you use?
25
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:03,947
Anne left one behind.
Behind the fridge, to be exact.
26
00:06:03,947 --> 00:06:06,575
So either mice have taken up shaving,
27
00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:09,578
or that stubble was sheared
from her calves.
28
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,663
I thought of mounting a tuft in a locket.
29
00:06:13,415 --> 00:06:15,709
You needn't have taken
the only one we have.
30
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,211
It also happens to be the only one I have.
31
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:21,214
Couldn't you have shared Ted's?
32
00:06:22,591 --> 00:06:26,595
It's no pleasure slicing open my chin
with my estranged wife's razor blade.
33
00:06:26,595 --> 00:06:29,848
The symbolism may be cleft,
but the memory still smarts.
34
00:06:29,848 --> 00:06:31,516
I didn't mean to take it,
in point of fact.
35
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:33,059
I put it in the bag without thinking.
36
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:38,732
Lust is no excuse for thoughtlessness.
37
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:44,821
And where is your bag?
38
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,492
I left it with Reg.
39
00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:52,329
Reg? Who's Reg?
40
00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,665
The one you call Ted
is the one I call Reg.
41
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:57,667
He calls himself Reg too.
42
00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,169
How sweet.
43
00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:01,296
In fact,
everybody calls him Reg except you.
44
00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:03,089
You call him Ted.
45
00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:07,052
Now why do I do that, I wonder?
46
00:07:08,219 --> 00:07:09,262
To embarrass me.
47
00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:12,557
Oh, yes, that must be it.
48
00:07:14,893 --> 00:07:16,144
Did you have a good weekend?
49
00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:17,896
It was all right.
50
00:07:32,744 --> 00:07:34,537
Butley, English.
51
00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:37,248
Oh, hello, James. Have a nice break?
52
00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:43,046
Oh, dear. Hmm.
53
00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:54,891
James, I'm sorry. I can't talk now.
I'm right in the middle of a tutorial.
54
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:57,060
Bye.
55
00:07:58,103 --> 00:07:59,270
How is he this morning?
56
00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:01,106
-Who?
-James.
57
00:08:02,065 --> 00:08:03,525
Ah! Our professor.
58
00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:06,903
Oh, he and Hazel spent
most of the break in bed
59
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:10,865
recovering from
one of Hazel's gastric goulashes.
60
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:11,908
Are there any details yet?
61
00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:16,496
You want details of James's diarrhea?
62
00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:18,957
You know what I mean. About my board.
63
00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:23,420
Ah. About your board. Yes.
64
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,088
Now when is that, exactly?
65
00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:26,798
-A fortnight tomorrow.
-Indeed.
66
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,883
A fortnight tomorrow. Mmm-hmm.
67
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:37,183
"How do you do, Mistress Pussy?
Mistress Pussy, how do you do?
68
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:40,603
I thank you kindly, little dog,
I fare as well as you!"
69
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:42,105
Did he say anything?
70
00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:47,569
You are genuinely interested
in this promotion of yours, aren't you?
71
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:48,987
Why?
72
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:52,949
No, he did not say anything.
Your name did not come up,
73
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:54,659
and there is no reason that it should
74
00:08:55,577 --> 00:08:58,872
until', in the normal course of events
and strictly according to the rules,
75
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,665
the board is rigged,
the strings are pulled,
76
00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:04,252
and it is passed over for that of someone
more closely related to the principal,
77
00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:06,755
or with more distinguished qualifications.
78
00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:10,550
I should warn you that there are almost
as many of the latter as of the former.
79
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:11,718
Mmm.
80
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:16,347
"Cecily Parsley lived in a pen,
And brewed good ale for gentlemen,
81
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:18,850
Gentlemen came every day,
82
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:22,312
Till Cecily Parsley ran away."
83
00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:24,731
Why?
84
00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:30,028
Why has he got your bag?
85
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:32,989
He happened to pick it up for me
when we got off the train.
86
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,575
Not many young men
are as gallant these days.
87
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:39,287
You've not been home yet, then?
88
00:09:39,704 --> 00:09:40,872
To the flat? No.
89
00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:41,873
Ah. Why not?
90
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,084
Because I haven't had time, obviously.
91
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:46,711
I waited for you.
92
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:49,672
Did you? Sorry.
93
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,303
You had a nice little mid-term break then,
did you?
94
00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:56,429
It was all right.
95
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,474
Well, are you going to tell me about it
or shall I probe and pry?
96
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:02,143
I'd rather let it slip out naturally,
if I may.
97
00:10:02,143 --> 00:10:04,813
But you're much more charming
under interrogation.
98
00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:08,858
My natural force plays excitingly
with your natural submissiveness.
99
00:10:08,858 --> 00:10:12,987
Or has your holiday changed you,
as we say in the trade, radically?
100
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,241
Ah! I thought so. Blake!
101
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:19,661
Now, why is your briefcase
bulging with Blake? What's this?
102
00:10:19,661 --> 00:10:22,914
I happen to be lecturing on him this half.
Look, kindly don't mess my notes up.
103
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:25,500
-Can I have it back, please?
-Notes to whom? Reg?
104
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:30,213
"What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?"
105
00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:33,508
Yes, I suppose Ted is quite symmetrical
in a burly sort of way.
106
00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:38,346
"Did he who made the Lamb make thee?“
107
00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:40,265
All right, all right, let's be infantile.
108
00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:45,145
No, bags first go.
I haven't unpacked it for weeks.
109
00:10:46,229 --> 00:10:47,230
Oh.
110
00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:56,781
It's laid out like a film script.
111
00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,201
It must be an American MA thesis.
112
00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:05,415
"Henry James
and the Crucified Consciousness." Yeah.
113
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:10,211
Ooh. Now where's the other?
There must be a pair.
114
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:12,380
You mean you forgot
to give his thesis back?
115
00:11:12,714 --> 00:11:15,133
No, not yet.
So far I've forgotten to read it.
116
00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:17,510
Forgetting to give it back comes later.
117
00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:21,014
Failing Americans
is a slow and intricate ritual,
118
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,725
and that's what they come here for,
the ritual.
119
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,476
Ah, here it is.
120
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:27,770
Those are mine, naturally.
121
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,314
Naturally, you're very welcome.
122
00:11:30,273 --> 00:11:33,026
Personally, I wouldn't be caught dead
wearing a pair like that.
123
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:34,903
Those happen to be mine, too.
124
00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:37,113
Well, you really must give up
buying cheap socks.
125
00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:38,865
I can feel a hole growing around the toe.
126
00:11:39,574 --> 00:11:41,451
Perhaps if you bothered
to cut your toenails...
127
00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:43,828
Are we going to have a tantrum?
128
00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:46,456
The thing is to stop your rubbish
creeping across to my side of the room.
129
00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:47,582
Here, anyway.
130
00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:50,043
Are we? I'd quite enjoy one.
131
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:52,337
-Would you?
-Yes. Then I'll know you're back, you see.
132
00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:54,631
You've been a little thin
on presence so far.
133
00:11:55,256 --> 00:11:56,758
There is not enough room.
134
00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:20,031
I was wondering if I might inquire
as to how your friend is. May I?
135
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:22,533
Oh, I'm so glad.
136
00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:27,580
May I ask-- Oh, done all those, have we?
Hadn't done them last week, had you?
137
00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:30,416
Did you do them on the train,
going “hup” with your friend?
138
00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:32,877
Hi always say
that "hif" a job's worth doing,
139
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:33,962
it's worth ignoring.
140
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:40,426
Oh, sorry. I was just wondering
when my tutorials are.
141
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:43,221
Oh, same as last term,
except, of course, for this week.
142
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:47,600
You didn't take me last term.
My name is Heasman, Carol Heasman.
143
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,352
I'm replacing Mrs. Grainger.
144
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,562
Mrs. Grainger?
145
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:53,189
Yes.
146
00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:57,068
She said she didn't get to see you often,
owing to administrative tangles.
147
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,655
Mrs. Grainger got into
administrative tangles?
148
00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:04,200
No, you were busy with them.
149
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:09,080
Oh, if only they'd let us get on with it
and teach.
150
00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,126
Anyway,
you'd better come at the same hours
151
00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:14,377
as Mrs. Grainger then, all' right?
152
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,838
I expect so. What were they?
153
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:19,924
Could you find out from Mrs. Grainger,
please?
154
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:23,469
I'll try.
155
00:13:26,848 --> 00:13:27,890
Thank you.
156
00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:34,772
I didn't care for that one at all.
157
00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:36,524
There was an air of mad devotion about her
158
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:39,402
that reminds me of my wife's mother,
the mad monk.
159
00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:49,871
You're in trouble, Joey.
160
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,457
What?
161
00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:54,125
I'm sorry. I...
162
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:57,253
I've been wondering how to tell you.
163
00:13:59,130 --> 00:14:03,051
Still, as you've got a fortnight
before your board...
164
00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:08,848
A member of the department
has his knife out.
165
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:11,142
Who?
166
00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:13,436
That pre-break meeting we had,
167
00:14:13,436 --> 00:14:15,897
the one you had to leave early
to meet Reg?
168
00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:17,899
Yes. Well?
169
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,735
-The contemporary books list?
-Yes. We", go on.
170
00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:24,947
Well, on the face of it,
you were very adroit.
171
00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:26,616
You didn't actually support me,
172
00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:29,577
but you indicated a certain attitude,
shall we say,
173
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:33,206
by coughing into my speeches
with dialectical authority.
174
00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:38,169
You wouldn't have thought
that so genteel a rhetorical device
175
00:14:38,169 --> 00:14:40,797
could give offense on the face of it, eh?
176
00:14:41,839 --> 00:14:43,216
But who-- who did I offend?
177
00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:50,223
First of all, who proposed
that a contemporary novel's list--
178
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,936
Burroughs, Genet, Roth, etcetera --
be added to our syllabus?
179
00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:57,522
-You did.
-And who opposed it?
180
00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,190
Everybody else. Except me.
181
00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:02,860
-Who won?
-We d-- You did.
182
00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:05,905
They gave way in the end, didn't they?
183
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:10,326
Oh, yes, it was passed unanimously.
184
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:17,542
But I happen to know that one person,
one powerful person there,
185
00:15:18,543 --> 00:15:22,088
resented our victory and blamed you,
186
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,632
yes, you, for it.
187
00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:27,969
But this is ridiculous! It's absolutely--
I scarcely said anything anyway.
188
00:15:27,969 --> 00:15:29,095
Exactly.
189
00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:34,183
But this person was hoping,
was relying on you
190
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,727
to oppose that book list
with every cell in your body.
191
00:15:37,228 --> 00:15:38,604
Ben, please, eh?
192
00:15:38,604 --> 00:15:40,148
Now think, child, think!
193
00:15:40,523 --> 00:15:43,359
Who had most to lose
by that book list being passed?
194
00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,111
Who is most affected?
195
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,280
Nobody at all.
You're the one who's going to teach it,
196
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,574
they'll be your lectures, your seminars,
and your tutor--
197
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:55,580
Exactly!
198
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:58,916
Precisely! Absolutely!
199
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,837
Fool! Imbecile! Traitor!
200
00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:05,756
Lackey.
201
00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,093
I wouldn't be caught dead
reading those books.
202
00:16:09,093 --> 00:16:11,888
And you know how it exhausts me
to teach books I haven't read.
203
00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:14,932
Why didn't you oppose me?
204
00:16:15,933 --> 00:16:18,060
It's your own fault.
Your instructions were quite clear.
205
00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:21,230
Haven't you heard of a subtext?
206
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:23,608
Very fashionable now.
207
00:16:24,275 --> 00:16:27,778
In fact, I remember advising you
to use the word twice in every paper
208
00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,072
when I was guiding you
through your finals.
209
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:33,034
But what's the matter, dear?
210
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:36,078
You're looking a little peaky
around the gills, wherever they are.
211
00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:38,831
Were you frightened a trifle?
212
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:44,295
You needn't be.
You played the toad to perfection.
213
00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:48,549
Is there a subtext to that,
or can I take it as straight abuse?
214
00:16:49,759 --> 00:16:51,511
It's straight abuse. Can you take it?
215
00:16:52,303 --> 00:16:53,304
No, not any longer.
216
00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:55,932
-Where are you going?
-To the library.
217
00:16:55,932 --> 00:16:58,476
-Why?
-I've got a lecture at 12:00.
218
00:16:58,476 --> 00:17:00,186
But you're not running away
from me so soon.
219
00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:03,523
And there are a few things on my Herrick
I've got to dig up.
220
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:05,399
Dig up!
221
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:08,277
"Diggory Diggory Delvet,
A little old man in black velvet,
222
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,446
He digs and he delves
You can see for yourselves
223
00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:12,240
The holes dug by Diggory Delvet."
224
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,699
It is velvet, isn't it, this jacket?
225
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,159
Don't flounce.
226
00:17:19,914 --> 00:17:22,041
You were due back last night, remember?
227
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:23,709
Did it make any difference?
228
00:17:24,252 --> 00:17:26,379
In that I spent the evening expecting you.
229
00:17:26,921 --> 00:17:29,924
In point of fact, I said I'd either
be back last night or this morning.
230
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,134
Also, you didn't phone.
231
00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:35,388
I was only in Leeds for four days.
Of course I didn't phone.
232
00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:37,848
Why not? Language difficulties?
233
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:44,897
I reserved a table at Bianchi's.
I was going to take us out.
234
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:51,404
-I'm sorry. It just didn't occur to me.
-It doesn't matter.
235
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,656
-I'm sure I said--
-Yes, yes, I expect you did.
236
00:17:53,656 --> 00:17:54,782
I expect you did.
237
00:17:57,243 --> 00:18:00,204
It's just that I assumed
you were coming back. That's all.
238
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:07,670
And as I spent four days on the phone
talking to people who weren't there...
239
00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:11,591
Bugger'.
240
00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,847
Sorry. All right?
241
00:18:21,976 --> 00:18:23,769
And if that doesn't satisfy you,
242
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:28,608
Edna thinks well of you,
and James is more than happy.
243
00:18:30,234 --> 00:18:31,319
How do you know?
244
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:35,740
These things slip out
under my persistent questionings.
245
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:44,749
Edna's actually very important, isn't she?
246
00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:47,585
It depends rather on the context.
247
00:18:48,169 --> 00:18:49,420
I mean in terms of influence.
248
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:51,297
You mean in terms of promotion?
249
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:53,716
Well...
250
00:18:56,636 --> 00:19:00,806
Tell me. While you were
amusing yourselves up in Leeds,
251
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:05,436
I saw a film on television
about a publisher who hates himself.
252
00:19:05,436 --> 00:19:08,898
Now, I've been meaning to ask you,
does Ted hate himself?
253
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,109
He quite likes himself, actually.
254
00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:14,695
Does he ever discuss his work with you?
255
00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:16,656
Or does he leave it behind him
at the office?
256
00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:20,368
When you go around
to one of those little dinners of yours,
257
00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:23,663
does he put his feet up, perhaps,
while you slave away over a hot stove,
258
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,039
or does he do the cooking?
259
00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:27,708
No, no, I don't mean to probe.
Or am I prying?
260
00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:32,004
For instance, in our professor's ménage,
261
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,965
Hazel rips the meat apart
with saw-edged knives
262
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:37,927
while James brews up sauces
from Guardian headlines.
263
00:19:38,302 --> 00:19:40,805
In my ménage-- when I had one, remember?
264
00:19:40,805 --> 00:19:44,058
Anne undergrilled the chops
and over-boiled the peas
265
00:19:44,058 --> 00:19:47,228
while I drank the wine
and charted my dropping sugar-count.
266
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:50,773
Now that you and I
are sharing my life again,
267
00:19:50,773 --> 00:19:53,859
I open the tins,
and you stir the Nescafé again,
268
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:58,197
just as we always used to do,
those evenings, at least,
269
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:01,158
when you're not cooking for Reg
or Reg isn't cooking for you,
270
00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:03,411
which, arriving where we began,
does it happen to be?
271
00:20:03,411 --> 00:20:06,372
And if it is the former, why,
now I come to think of it,
272
00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:08,499
have you never cooked for me,
do you think?
273
00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:12,128
He does the cooking, in point of fact.
274
00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:21,095
Oh, Christ, I feel awful.
275
00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:28,185
Do you know, all the time you were away,
276
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,896
I didn't have one telephone call.
277
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,400
I consider that very frightening.
278
00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:36,902
Not even from Tom.
279
00:20:38,863 --> 00:20:41,115
Oh, I thought you found
his company intolerable.
280
00:20:41,866 --> 00:20:42,825
Yes.
281
00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:45,077
But one likes, as they say, to be asked.
282
00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:51,208
Also, one likes people to be consistent,
otherwise one starts coming adrift.
283
00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:53,002
At least this one will.
284
00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:58,758
Also, how does one know whether Tom
is still the most boring man in London
285
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:01,135
unless he phones in regularly
to confirm it?
286
00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:04,847
This is the fourth week running
he's kept me in suspense.
287
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:09,894
He and Reg have a lot in common,
haven't they?
288
00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:10,853
Really?
289
00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:14,482
Didn't Ted do his National Service
with the Gurkhas?
290
00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:16,859
I really can't remember.
291
00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:19,111
I've never been very interested
in Ted's military car--
292
00:21:21,614 --> 00:21:24,325
Reg's military career,
which was anyway about a decade ago.
293
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:28,954
Oh, but the experience lives on for us
through our born raconteurs,
294
00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:31,332
and Ted is something of a raconteur,
isn't he?
295
00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:35,753
That magnificent anecdote of his,
now surely you remember?
296
00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:37,421
No.
Look, I really must get to the library.
297
00:21:37,421 --> 00:21:39,423
No, wait. You repeated it to me.
298
00:21:39,423 --> 00:21:41,884
The one about the Gurkha
with a bowl of soup.
299
00:21:42,593 --> 00:21:45,888
Now I don't know whether I can do
your imitation of his accent.
300
00:21:46,347 --> 00:21:49,350
“Woon day, Chef was in t'kitchen--"
Is that close?
301
00:21:49,683 --> 00:21:53,312
"Stirring t'soup wi' his elbows,
when in coom a little tyke."
302
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:54,522
I remember.
303
00:21:54,522 --> 00:21:56,065
I was sure you would.
304
00:21:57,650 --> 00:22:00,528
Your imitation of Reg
made me laugh so much,
305
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:03,072
I was prepared to overlook its cruelty.
306
00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:08,577
My point was that Tom
307
00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:12,832
is a great National Service bore, too.
308
00:22:15,793 --> 00:22:18,420
There's that six-volume novel
he's writing about it.
309
00:22:20,422 --> 00:22:23,843
That's something else.
Yes, he's stopped showing me the drafts.
310
00:22:24,885 --> 00:22:27,596
The last time he brought one around,
you dropped it in the bath.
311
00:22:27,930 --> 00:22:30,558
"It"? He brought around 17 exercise books,
312
00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:32,685
of which I dropped a mere three
into the bath.
313
00:22:32,685 --> 00:22:35,437
No, I don't like his silence.
It's sinister.
314
00:22:36,063 --> 00:22:38,482
-Well, you could always phone him up.
-I haven't finished!
315
00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:45,155
Look, I must do something
on this bloody lecture.
316
00:22:45,739 --> 00:22:46,824
Why?
317
00:22:47,658 --> 00:22:48,784
You're looking furtive.
318
00:22:49,952 --> 00:22:51,203
Why are you looking furtive?
319
00:22:51,954 --> 00:22:54,456
I'm not looking at all furtive.
320
00:22:54,456 --> 00:22:56,041
Have you seen Tom recently?
321
00:22:57,209 --> 00:22:58,294
No. No, I haven't.
322
00:22:59,003 --> 00:23:00,296
When did you last hear from him?
323
00:23:02,756 --> 00:23:03,799
Perhaps he's busy.
324
00:23:05,259 --> 00:23:06,343
Of course he's busy.
325
00:23:06,927 --> 00:23:08,721
He's too damn dull to be anything else.
326
00:23:09,930 --> 00:23:12,725
The point is, why has he stopped
being busy with me?
327
00:23:14,143 --> 00:23:15,269
Do you think he's dropped me?
328
00:23:16,937 --> 00:23:19,940
His attentions have been slackening
ever since my marriage broke up,
329
00:23:19,940 --> 00:23:20,900
come to think of it.
330
00:23:24,528 --> 00:23:25,905
He's very fond of Anne, isn't he?
331
00:23:27,156 --> 00:23:30,618
That's an idea.
I must find out if he's been hounding her.
332
00:23:32,912 --> 00:23:36,123
Yes. But Anne--
She likes him, doesn't she?
333
00:23:36,123 --> 00:23:39,209
I mean, I always thought,
or had the impression,
334
00:23:39,209 --> 00:23:40,461
that she was fond of him.
335
00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:43,797
I expect she became addicted, yes.
336
00:23:44,882 --> 00:23:48,761
She took up all my vices
except smoking, drinking, and you.
337
00:23:49,345 --> 00:23:52,056
She never cared for you. Do you know that?
338
00:23:52,806 --> 00:23:54,934
I had my suspicions.
Thank you for confirming them.
339
00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:58,562
Why,
she said that Tom became a schoolteacher
340
00:23:58,562 --> 00:23:59,730
because he had to prove,
341
00:23:59,730 --> 00:24:02,191
after three years of being taught by me
at Cambridge,
342
00:24:02,191 --> 00:24:04,443
that education was still' a serious affair.
343
00:24:05,194 --> 00:24:09,114
Whereas you wanted to get back
to your old college here, and with me,
344
00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:13,369
because you were incapable
of outgrowing your early influences.
345
00:24:13,661 --> 00:24:15,329
Nursery dependence.
346
00:24:15,913 --> 00:24:20,292
This analysis was based crudely
on the fact that you are homosexual.
347
00:24:21,126 --> 00:24:27,383
She also said you were sly and pushing,
and that she didn't trust you an inch.
348
00:24:29,093 --> 00:24:30,344
You never told me this before.
349
00:24:30,803 --> 00:24:31,929
You never asked me before.
350
00:24:32,554 --> 00:24:33,847
I didn't ask you now, either.
351
00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:36,308
I know. But I got tired of waiting.
352
00:24:38,811 --> 00:24:39,853
Do you like her?
353
00:24:41,063 --> 00:24:42,272
I thought we were friends.
354
00:24:42,856 --> 00:24:47,152
I'm sure you still are.
She just can't stand you. That's all.
355
00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:50,531
Something about you gives her the creeps,
was her word.
356
00:24:53,409 --> 00:24:54,368
Creeps.
357
00:24:57,788 --> 00:25:00,958
Tell' me. What does he do, eh, Reg's dad?
358
00:25:04,044 --> 00:25:05,504
But we're not ashamed, are we?
359
00:25:07,715 --> 00:25:10,050
What does Reg's daddy do?
360
00:25:11,093 --> 00:25:12,177
He owns a shop.
361
00:25:12,678 --> 00:25:14,972
-What sort of shop?
-Just a shop.
362
00:25:15,889 --> 00:25:16,974
Just a shop?
363
00:25:17,808 --> 00:25:19,643
Just a shop like Harrods, for example?
364
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:21,687
What does he sell?
365
00:25:23,397 --> 00:25:24,356
Meat, I think.
366
00:25:25,816 --> 00:25:26,859
You think.
367
00:25:28,110 --> 00:25:29,194
Did you ever see the shop?
368
00:25:29,695 --> 00:25:30,654
Of course. Why?
369
00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,240
-Was there meat on display?
-Yes.
370
00:25:34,450 --> 00:25:36,785
Well, in that case,
he either owns a meat museum,
371
00:25:37,578 --> 00:25:40,497
or if it was for sale, you're quite right,
he owns a shop that sells meat.
372
00:25:40,956 --> 00:25:42,916
He's what's called a butcher.
373
00:25:46,128 --> 00:25:47,171
That's right.
374
00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:55,929
He's a butcher.
375
00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:58,515
Mmm-hmm.
376
00:26:01,018 --> 00:26:03,020
And do they live over their shop?
377
00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:08,817
No. They live in, uh, a place
just outside Leeds, in point of fact.
378
00:26:09,443 --> 00:26:10,778
In Point of Fact?
379
00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:14,823
What sort of place is it?
380
00:26:14,823 --> 00:26:17,326
A Georgian terraced house,
a Chippendale-style flat,
381
00:26:18,118 --> 00:26:20,829
a dug-out, a rural' cottage,
382
00:26:21,955 --> 00:26:23,082
a bungalow?
383
00:26:23,624 --> 00:26:24,625
Yes. A bungalow.
384
00:26:25,292 --> 00:26:26,919
A bungalow, eh?
385
00:26:28,837 --> 00:26:31,215
Now let's see, starting with the garden,
386
00:26:31,215 --> 00:26:33,634
do they have, say,
plaster gnomes in the garden?
387
00:26:34,510 --> 00:26:38,889
And much to your satisfaction, say,
an electric fire with coals in it,
388
00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:41,809
and a sofa decorated with doilies
389
00:26:42,226 --> 00:26:43,602
and a revolving bookcase
390
00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,063
with the collected works
of Mazo de la Roche.
391
00:26:46,647 --> 00:26:48,690
In the garden? How witty!
392
00:26:49,316 --> 00:26:51,610
And their front doorbell plays a tune.
Can you believe that?
393
00:26:53,403 --> 00:26:55,364
They happen to be very nice people,
nevertheless.
394
00:26:55,823 --> 00:26:56,865
Nevertheless what?
395
00:26:59,284 --> 00:27:01,495
Nevertheless,
they happen to be very nice people.
396
00:27:04,331 --> 00:27:05,415
What tune?
397
00:27:13,382 --> 00:27:16,218
Does Reg's mother work in the shop too?
398
00:27:16,218 --> 00:27:17,302
No.
399
00:27:17,302 --> 00:27:19,972
-Oh. Where is she then, in the daytime?
-Out.
400
00:27:19,972 --> 00:27:21,348
-Out where?
-Just out.
401
00:27:21,849 --> 00:27:24,518
-Oh, she has a job, then?
-Yes.
402
00:27:24,518 --> 00:27:27,146
Where does she do this job?
On the streets?
403
00:27:28,522 --> 00:27:29,898
You could put it like that, yes.
404
00:27:29,898 --> 00:27:31,733
Oh, what does she do? Sweep them?
405
00:27:32,276 --> 00:27:33,235
No.
406
00:27:35,195 --> 00:27:37,531
-She walks them?
-Yes, in point of fact.
407
00:27:37,948 --> 00:27:39,700
The precise suburb is irrelevant.
408
00:27:40,909 --> 00:27:43,162
So Reg's mother...
409
00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:46,623
is a prostitute.
410
00:27:48,584 --> 00:27:50,085
No, she's a traffic warden.
411
00:27:52,963 --> 00:27:54,047
She isn't!
412
00:27:56,550 --> 00:27:58,385
But what on earth did you do?
413
00:27:59,428 --> 00:28:00,387
Nothing in particular.
414
00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:04,641
-You went to a football match.
-Football match?
415
00:28:04,641 --> 00:28:06,393
Yes. Hasn't it caught on there?
416
00:28:06,935 --> 00:28:10,314
Down here in the south,
we place it slightly below music
417
00:28:10,314 --> 00:28:12,399
and well above the theatre
in the cultural scale.
418
00:28:14,026 --> 00:28:15,194
-Did you?
-What?
419
00:28:15,777 --> 00:28:16,987
Go to any football matches?
420
00:28:17,821 --> 00:28:19,781
Well done.
Yes, we went to a football match,
421
00:28:20,949 --> 00:28:24,745
and furthermore, we wore rosettes,
coloured scarves, special hats,
422
00:28:24,745 --> 00:28:25,871
and carried rattles.
423
00:28:26,955 --> 00:28:28,916
You didn't!
424
00:28:30,167 --> 00:28:33,045
Rattles and rosettes?
425
00:28:33,754 --> 00:28:34,838
You didn't!
426
00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:39,635
You poor old sod.
Why in Christ did you stay?
427
00:28:42,262 --> 00:28:44,765
All right, then,
why did he take you there?
428
00:28:44,765 --> 00:28:48,060
Is it rather like taking one's latest girl
back to the folks?
429
00:28:48,477 --> 00:28:49,561
His friend's back.
430
00:28:51,396 --> 00:28:53,065
He doesn't like people to know he's queer.
431
00:28:54,650 --> 00:28:56,485
And a lot of the time,
he doesn't like me to know.
432
00:28:58,028 --> 00:29:00,405
I suppose he probably took me there
as a kind of compliment
433
00:29:00,405 --> 00:29:01,865
and perhaps as a test.
434
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:05,994
To see if you could take him au nature].
435
00:29:06,954 --> 00:29:08,914
He's much more natural
as a London publisher
436
00:29:08,914 --> 00:29:11,041
who knows all about food,
and cooks marvellously.
437
00:29:11,041 --> 00:29:13,043
Much more natural
and much more convincing.
438
00:29:15,754 --> 00:29:16,713
But tell me...
439
00:29:18,048 --> 00:29:20,175
the butcher and the traffic warden,
440
00:29:21,468 --> 00:29:22,719
do they...
441
00:29:24,888 --> 00:29:26,098
know?
442
00:29:27,099 --> 00:29:28,183
Know what?
443
00:29:30,936 --> 00:29:32,145
-Oops! Oh, sorry'
-Sorry! I
444
00:29:32,145 --> 00:29:35,607
I was just dashing off to the registrar.
Some administrative tangle.
445
00:29:35,607 --> 00:29:37,734
-Mrs. Grainger, isn't it?
-Miss Heasman.
446
00:29:37,734 --> 00:29:38,902
I can't find Mrs. Grainger,
447
00:29:39,069 --> 00:29:41,488
but I'm very anxious for a session
on A Winter's Tale.
448
00:29:41,488 --> 00:29:42,906
Oh, good God! Are you really? Yes.
449
00:29:43,073 --> 00:29:45,409
Well, keep trying
and perhaps by next week, I'll--
450
00:29:45,409 --> 00:29:46,910
Look, I go this way. Bye-bye.
451
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:17,357
Thank you very much indeed, Nurse.
452
00:30:31,872 --> 00:30:33,457
But you and Reg have it off together?
453
00:30:35,417 --> 00:30:36,460
No, of course not.
454
00:30:36,877 --> 00:30:39,004
Now I'd like to stop talking about it,
if you don't mind.
455
00:30:39,004 --> 00:30:40,380
I'm beginning to feel queasy.
456
00:30:41,048 --> 00:30:42,924
Recollections of tripe and stout?
457
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:47,137
Guilt Lord, I pray,
answer thy servant's question!
458
00:30:47,137 --> 00:30:49,848
Is it guilt I feel, or is it indigestion?
459
00:30:50,557 --> 00:30:51,516
Don't worry.
460
00:30:52,142 --> 00:30:57,314
Rognons au vin at Bianchi's
will soon calm the unsettled soul.
461
00:30:58,398 --> 00:30:59,608
What, tonight, you mean? For dinner?
462
00:31:01,234 --> 00:31:03,612
Well, I hardly fancy them for tea.
463
00:31:08,158 --> 00:31:09,910
The thing is,
I'm going around to Reg's tonight.
464
00:31:12,412 --> 00:31:15,582
Well, I'm sorry, it just seemed impossible
not to go, under the circumstances.
465
00:31:18,460 --> 00:31:19,419
Mmm-hmm.
466
00:31:21,713 --> 00:31:24,174
Well,
I'm willing to treat Reg if necessary.
467
00:31:25,467 --> 00:31:27,886
Ah, well, you see,
Reg has already got our dinner.
468
00:31:28,970 --> 00:31:30,555
Oh! What has he got for your dinner?
469
00:31:31,515 --> 00:31:32,808
Kidneys, as a matter of fact.
470
00:31:32,808 --> 00:31:35,852
His father gave him some special
English kidneys as a treat.
471
00:31:36,019 --> 00:31:37,687
-Lamb's kidneys.
-Mmm-hmm.
472
00:31:38,105 --> 00:31:40,565
-Sorry.
-No, there's no problem.
473
00:31:41,274 --> 00:31:43,527
I'll get some more,
and Ted can cook them for me.
474
00:31:45,612 --> 00:31:46,655
What's the matter?
475
00:31:47,489 --> 00:31:48,490
I'd rather you didn't.
476
00:31:49,783 --> 00:31:51,743
Oh. May one ask why?
477
00:31:53,829 --> 00:31:54,913
It might be awkward.
478
00:31:55,664 --> 00:31:57,874
Oh? May one wonder why?
479
00:32:00,585 --> 00:32:02,462
Perhaps he doesn't like you very much.
480
00:32:03,630 --> 00:32:04,756
You surprise me.
481
00:32:05,340 --> 00:32:08,051
I thought he'd taken rather a fancy
on our one meeting.
482
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,763
On your one meeting, you pretended
you thought he was an Australian
483
00:32:11,763 --> 00:32:13,014
and addressed him as "Cobber."
484
00:32:14,057 --> 00:32:16,309
You also pretended you thought
he was an interior decorator,
485
00:32:16,309 --> 00:32:19,438
in order to remind him of Ted,
whom he knew to be his predecessor.
486
00:32:20,105 --> 00:32:22,107
You were also sick over his shoes.
487
00:32:25,402 --> 00:32:27,654
It was a terrible evening. He hated you.
488
00:32:28,113 --> 00:32:29,656
You exaggerate.
489
00:32:29,656 --> 00:32:32,576
The confusion over his national identity
and profession
490
00:32:32,576 --> 00:32:35,537
lasted a mere 20 minutes
at the beginning of the evening.
491
00:32:35,537 --> 00:32:39,416
It took me some 20 seconds to be sick
over his shoes at the evening's end.
492
00:32:39,833 --> 00:32:42,711
The intervening hour
was an unqualified success,
493
00:32:43,420 --> 00:32:46,923
in spite of the odd misunderstanding
that developed into an occasional quarrel.
494
00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:50,886
Anyway, you know perfectly well
I'd taken up drinking again
495
00:32:50,886 --> 00:32:53,346
because I was still brooding
over Anne's departure.
496
00:32:53,346 --> 00:32:55,265
I had what is known as a drinking problem.
497
00:32:56,057 --> 00:32:57,058
I no longer have it.
498
00:32:58,018 --> 00:33:00,687
Let's face it, Ben, you drink every night.
Very heavily.
499
00:33:01,313 --> 00:33:05,192
Exactly. There's no problem.
I'm used to it again.
500
00:33:06,776 --> 00:33:07,903
Well, Joey?
501
00:33:11,531 --> 00:33:13,783
I might also be glad
of a chance to make it up.
502
00:33:13,783 --> 00:33:17,329
I enjoy being on terms with your chaps.
503
00:33:19,664 --> 00:33:23,293
Also, I don't fancy a fifth night
of eating alone.
504
00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:27,631
Well?
505
00:33:28,215 --> 00:33:29,299
He won't want you to come.
506
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:32,344
-Have you asked him?
-No.
507
00:33:32,719 --> 00:33:36,973
Well, why don't you-- Here, come on now.
Let's find out, eh? There.
508
00:33:36,973 --> 00:33:38,850
-He's not there.
-How do you know, unless you try?
509
00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:40,477
He said he wouldn't be there
until after lunch.
510
00:33:40,477 --> 00:33:42,562
He told me he had some things to do.
511
00:33:44,189 --> 00:33:45,941
Hello, Ben. Joey.
512
00:33:45,941 --> 00:33:47,651
-Oh, hello, Edna.
-Hello.
513
00:33:47,651 --> 00:33:49,486
-Am I barging in on something?
-Oh, no, no.
514
00:33:49,486 --> 00:33:52,197
No, not at all. In fact,
I was just on my way to the library.
515
00:33:52,197 --> 00:33:53,657
Oh, it's no good going there.
516
00:33:53,657 --> 00:33:56,368
It's closed while they install
a new security device.
517
00:33:56,368 --> 00:33:57,869
It won't be open until this evening.
518
00:33:58,245 --> 00:33:59,871
Oh, well, that's that, then.
519
00:33:59,871 --> 00:34:01,831
Isn't that a comment on our times?
520
00:34:02,457 --> 00:34:04,459
Indeed.
521
00:34:05,085 --> 00:34:07,379
Do you know, I found a couple of students
in the canteen.
522
00:34:08,255 --> 00:34:11,132
They actually pretended to have heard
from some source or other
523
00:34:11,132 --> 00:34:13,843
that there were no tutorials
during the first week of the half.
524
00:34:14,594 --> 00:34:15,887
Now what do you think of that?
525
00:34:19,224 --> 00:34:20,350
Folie de grandeur.
526
00:34:21,601 --> 00:34:23,937
They must learn
to leave such decisions to us.
527
00:34:23,937 --> 00:34:27,440
Exactly. I wonder what they'd have to say
if we started putting them off
528
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:29,609
for any nonsensical reason
that came into our heads.
529
00:34:29,609 --> 00:34:31,403
Yes, I often wonder that.
530
00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:34,739
Oh, there's so much about them
one never finds out.
531
00:34:34,739 --> 00:34:36,700
They come, they go away.
532
00:34:37,117 --> 00:34:39,578
Do you know anything about
my particular black sheep, by the way?
533
00:34:40,036 --> 00:34:41,246
His name is Gardner.
534
00:34:41,788 --> 00:34:42,872
Gardner?
535
00:34:43,748 --> 00:34:45,458
Gardner, Gardner, Gardner.
536
00:34:45,959 --> 00:34:49,004
Yes, he comes to the odd lecture,
aloof in feathers.
537
00:34:49,629 --> 00:34:50,922
Feathers?
538
00:34:50,922 --> 00:34:52,299
He wears a kind of hat
with feathers in it.
539
00:34:52,841 --> 00:34:54,009
Yes, that dreadful hat.
540
00:34:54,593 --> 00:34:56,970
I wish there was some action
we could take about that, too.
541
00:34:57,804 --> 00:34:59,264
You don't remember him, Ben?
542
00:34:59,264 --> 00:35:01,182
I certainly can't place the hat.
543
00:35:02,017 --> 00:35:03,852
Isn't Gardner the one
you had a conversation with
544
00:35:04,019 --> 00:35:05,562
just before the break in a pub?
545
00:35:06,605 --> 00:35:08,023
A feathered youth?
546
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:10,442
In a public house?
547
00:35:11,151 --> 00:35:12,527
Certainly not.
548
00:35:12,944 --> 00:35:15,739
Actually, the reason I asked
whether you remember him, Ben,
549
00:35:15,739 --> 00:35:17,616
is that you interviewed him
for his place here.
550
00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:20,076
I've just looked him up in the files.
551
00:35:21,369 --> 00:35:25,290
Possibly. I only remember the ones
that we manage to reject,
552
00:35:25,999 --> 00:35:28,209
like Father O'Couligan, for instance.
553
00:35:28,209 --> 00:35:31,171
I must say, Ben, his headmaster's report
was very unfavourable.
554
00:35:31,171 --> 00:35:34,007
Oh, I'm not surprised.
Father O'Couligan was in his 405.
555
00:35:34,424 --> 00:35:36,176
The headmaster must have had him
in the sixth form
556
00:35:36,176 --> 00:35:37,761
for a couple of decades at least.
557
00:35:37,761 --> 00:35:41,097
Frankly, five minutes of Father O'Couligan
was as much as I could--
558
00:35:41,097 --> 00:35:44,100
No. I was talking about Gardner.
559
00:35:44,643 --> 00:35:47,354
I simply can't help wondering
what made you take him.
560
00:35:49,648 --> 00:35:54,778
Well, Edna, I suppose I must have decided
that he wasn't fit for anything else.
561
00:35:56,946 --> 00:35:58,865
A university isn't a charity, you know.
562
00:36:01,242 --> 00:36:03,244
Do you mean for me, Edna,
or for the students?
563
00:36:05,288 --> 00:36:08,500
I'm not in the mood to be flippant about
the more loutish of our students today.
564
00:36:08,500 --> 00:36:11,252
Not with the committee's report
on the university library incident
565
00:36:11,252 --> 00:36:12,337
fresh in my mind.
566
00:36:12,337 --> 00:36:13,588
Sorry, what report?
567
00:36:13,588 --> 00:36:14,798
It was in The Times this morning.
568
00:36:15,423 --> 00:36:17,926
I read it in The Guardian.
It was very disturbing.
569
00:36:17,926 --> 00:36:21,346
Disturbing? They completely destroyed
the Aristotle Collection.
570
00:36:21,346 --> 00:36:22,639
Completely destroyed it.
571
00:36:23,056 --> 00:36:25,100
That was their way of protesting
about South Africa.
572
00:36:25,558 --> 00:36:28,937
I thought it was about Rhodesia.
The university maintaining relationships--
573
00:36:28,937 --> 00:36:31,398
Well, one excuse
is as good as another, of course.
574
00:36:31,398 --> 00:36:33,483
James said it was about
the Greek Colonels.
575
00:36:33,483 --> 00:36:36,653
But perhaps
we're underestimating their capacity
576
00:36:36,653 --> 00:36:38,738
for direct logical connections.
577
00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:41,825
Perhaps they were protesting
about the Aristotle Collection.
578
00:36:42,492 --> 00:36:43,827
It wouldn't surprise me.
579
00:36:43,827 --> 00:36:45,161
I had one or two last term
580
00:36:45,161 --> 00:36:47,038
who were mutinous about
"The Faerie Queene."
581
00:36:47,622 --> 00:36:49,874
You mean the principal?
He really should learn discretion.
582
00:36:53,420 --> 00:36:55,880
No, Ben. You mustn't say things like that.
583
00:36:58,758 --> 00:37:01,636
Besides, the Aristotle Collection
is no laughing matter.
584
00:37:02,220 --> 00:37:04,139
But I intend to nip
young Gardner in the bud
585
00:37:04,139 --> 00:37:05,682
before he gets completely out of hand.
586
00:37:05,682 --> 00:37:08,685
I'm not having any bomb-throwing hooligan
skipping my seminars.
587
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:14,733
Well, any bomb-throwing hooligan
has permission to skip mine.
588
00:37:15,692 --> 00:37:17,318
Well,
there's no point in my haranguing you.
589
00:37:17,318 --> 00:37:18,820
I suppose I'd better take it to James.
590
00:37:20,029 --> 00:37:21,448
-To James?
-Certainly.
591
00:37:21,448 --> 00:37:23,450
Gardner is ripe for a Dean's Report.
592
00:37:27,620 --> 00:37:30,915
Oh, I meant to say,
you and Anne must come around soon,
593
00:37:30,915 --> 00:37:33,084
if you can bear an evening
in my poky little flat.
594
00:37:33,585 --> 00:37:35,879
-And Joey, of course.
-Thanks.
595
00:37:35,879 --> 00:37:36,880
I'd love to.
596
00:37:38,631 --> 00:37:39,841
How's the baby?
597
00:37:39,841 --> 00:37:42,844
Oh, all right, as far as one can tell.
598
00:37:43,386 --> 00:37:44,471
With babies, I mean.
599
00:37:44,471 --> 00:37:47,223
Yes, they are indecipherable, aren't they?
600
00:37:47,223 --> 00:37:48,433
How old is he now?
601
00:37:48,808 --> 00:37:51,978
He's nine or ten months, about.
602
00:37:53,646 --> 00:37:55,607
It's wretched of me,
but I've forgotten his name.
603
00:37:55,607 --> 00:37:57,692
Though I do remember him
as a bonny little thing.
604
00:37:58,276 --> 00:38:00,069
-Miranda.
-Marina.
605
00:38:01,196 --> 00:38:03,698
Oh, yes. Marina. He's called Marina.
606
00:38:03,698 --> 00:38:05,658
Oh, dear. Oh, Ben, I'm sorry.
607
00:38:05,658 --> 00:38:07,869
I always think of babies
as "hims" or "its".
608
00:38:08,620 --> 00:38:10,038
Probably safer these days.
609
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:12,957
Our ends never know our beginnings.
610
00:38:13,917 --> 00:38:15,293
Are you all right for babysitters?
611
00:38:16,211 --> 00:38:18,797
Babysitters? Oh, no problem.
612
00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:21,758
Marina's mother
makes a marvelous babysitter.
613
00:38:23,718 --> 00:38:27,180
Yes, and I'm afraid we're going through
what we professionals know...
614
00:38:28,306 --> 00:38:31,100
as a sticky patch.
615
00:38:32,143 --> 00:38:34,729
Oh, dear. Oh, Ben, I'm sorry.
616
00:38:35,438 --> 00:38:39,567
I don't know what to say.
You must both be desperately unhappy.
617
00:38:41,152 --> 00:38:42,111
Oh, dear.
618
00:38:42,946 --> 00:38:44,781
It's always so sad for the children.
619
00:38:45,365 --> 00:38:47,283
Yes, we do suffer the most.
620
00:38:50,954 --> 00:38:54,040
Where are you now, Joey?
Still in that bedsitter?
621
00:38:54,415 --> 00:38:59,254
Uh, no. I've moved back in with Ben again,
in point of fact.
622
00:38:59,254 --> 00:39:02,090
Oh,
so you're both back where you were, then.
623
00:39:03,216 --> 00:39:04,175
Exactly.
624
00:39:06,135 --> 00:39:08,847
By the way, did I mention
that the little office next to mine
625
00:39:08,847 --> 00:39:09,931
is going begging at last?
626
00:39:09,931 --> 00:39:11,558
So if either of you wants
a place of your own--
627
00:39:11,558 --> 00:39:14,269
Oh, thanks, Edna, but we're so used
to roughing it down here.
628
00:39:14,727 --> 00:39:15,895
It's up to you, of course.
629
00:39:17,105 --> 00:39:20,650
Well,
I must leave you two to get on with it.
630
00:39:25,488 --> 00:39:27,323
If you should clap eyes on young Gardner,
631
00:39:27,323 --> 00:39:30,076
please send him straight up to me
on pain of a Dean's Report.
632
00:39:39,210 --> 00:39:42,755
I enjoyed that. It was so graceful.
633
00:39:45,258 --> 00:39:48,386
In a little office next door to Edna.
Christ.
634
00:39:49,888 --> 00:39:53,975
What does she want Gardner for, anyway?
She's got her own little coterie,
635
00:39:54,475 --> 00:39:57,854
all the boys and girls that look as if
they've got the curse permanently.
636
00:39:58,688 --> 00:40:02,025
Her obsession with Byron
is one of the more triste perversions.
637
00:40:02,483 --> 00:40:04,903
But she should not be allowed
to practice it with students.
638
00:40:05,403 --> 00:40:07,113
She's got her bloody book for therapy.
639
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:08,573
She's finished the book.
640
00:40:08,948 --> 00:40:10,825
That's what she was telling me
on the tube this morning.
641
00:40:16,205 --> 00:40:18,166
Well done, Edna.
642
00:40:20,835 --> 00:40:24,130
I suppose it means another two decades
while she finds a publisher.
643
00:40:24,672 --> 00:40:25,632
She's found one.
644
00:40:28,176 --> 00:40:30,386
She never did understand her role,
645
00:40:31,012 --> 00:40:34,265
which is not to finish
an unpublishable book on Byron.
646
00:40:37,101 --> 00:40:41,439
Now the center cannot hold.
Mere Edna is loosed upon the world!
647
00:40:42,649 --> 00:40:43,608
Bloody woman!
648
00:40:44,776 --> 00:40:46,653
Bugger! Bugger.
649
00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:51,324
A Dean's Report.
650
00:40:53,952 --> 00:40:55,620
It was Gardner you told me about, then?
651
00:40:56,329 --> 00:40:58,665
The boy who complained
about Edna's seminars in a pub.
652
00:40:59,457 --> 00:41:02,460
Edna conducts her seminars in a pub?
I shall have to report this.
653
00:41:02,794 --> 00:41:04,087
The one you said was interesting.
654
00:41:05,338 --> 00:41:07,882
I don't find anything interesting
about a student
655
00:41:07,882 --> 00:41:10,134
who complains of Edna's seminars.
656
00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:12,971
You did it yourself years ago,
and you're as dull as they come.
657
00:41:13,346 --> 00:41:14,639
Did you encourage him?
658
00:41:15,181 --> 00:41:17,725
As far as I remember,
which is frankly nothing,
659
00:41:18,142 --> 00:41:20,645
we had
a perfectly respectable conversation
660
00:41:20,645 --> 00:41:23,189
about Edna's vagina, its length and width.
661
00:41:23,690 --> 00:41:24,691
Oh, God.
662
00:41:25,108 --> 00:41:26,609
Now, you mustn't be jealous, Joseph.
663
00:41:26,609 --> 00:41:29,529
The young are entitled to
the importunities that you once enjoyed.
664
00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:33,992
I can't afford to quarrel with Edna.
Besides, I've got to like her.
665
00:41:35,243 --> 00:41:37,495
Because you've got to,
doesn't mean I've got to.
666
00:41:37,954 --> 00:41:41,040
She thinks of us as allies.
If you upset her, she'll blame me, too.
667
00:41:42,125 --> 00:41:45,545
Oh,
what the hell are you doing here anyway?
668
00:41:45,545 --> 00:41:47,171
You're not lecturing till later.
669
00:41:47,171 --> 00:41:49,424
You could have gone straight home
and tidied up your room.
670
00:41:49,424 --> 00:41:50,758
It's in a disgusting state.
671
00:41:51,592 --> 00:41:54,929
The only room in the flat
that is not in a disgusting state is mine.
672
00:41:54,929 --> 00:41:57,432
Oh, really?
Then can you explain why it looks as if
673
00:41:57,432 --> 00:42:01,310
a large, dignified and intelligent man
has been going to seed in it?
674
00:42:02,937 --> 00:42:04,522
Did you have to use my room?
675
00:42:04,522 --> 00:42:06,691
Do you think I could put up with the mess
everywhere else?
676
00:42:08,443 --> 00:42:11,654
You're out most evenings.
It's easy for you to keep your room clean.
677
00:42:11,654 --> 00:42:14,699
Anyway, I don't see why you shouldn't
learn what it's like to stay at home
678
00:42:14,699 --> 00:42:16,826
and fret your way into a drunken coma.
679
00:42:19,328 --> 00:42:22,040
Is that your tantrum? How piffling.
680
00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:24,500
Look, Ben, I've got this lecture.
Can I do some work, please?
681
00:42:25,001 --> 00:42:26,794
As I can't go to the library, please?
682
00:42:27,462 --> 00:42:29,338
When are you gonna phone Reg up, then, eh?
683
00:42:30,048 --> 00:42:31,132
I told you. After lunch.
684
00:42:31,132 --> 00:42:33,051
Why are you lying about his being out?
685
00:42:33,051 --> 00:42:34,594
I don't make a habit of lying.
686
00:42:34,594 --> 00:42:36,262
Which is why you go on being so bad at it.
687
00:42:41,601 --> 00:42:42,894
Good morning, good morning, good morning.
688
00:42:43,061 --> 00:42:45,146
I just wanted to find out
about my tutorials.
689
00:42:45,438 --> 00:42:48,441
Oh, good, good. Have you got
an essay for me, then, please?
690
00:42:48,441 --> 00:42:49,525
You haven't set one.
691
00:42:49,525 --> 00:42:51,694
Oh, well,
do me one for next week, all right?
692
00:42:51,694 --> 00:42:52,820
What on?
693
00:42:52,820 --> 00:42:55,907
You must decide for yourself.
You can't expect spoon-feeding. Righto.
694
00:42:56,699 --> 00:42:57,950
I think that's the lot.
695
00:43:01,913 --> 00:43:03,372
I found Mrs. Grainger.
696
00:43:03,748 --> 00:43:06,709
She says she would have come to you
on Tuesdays at 3:00
697
00:43:06,709 --> 00:43:08,127
if you'd been able to see her.
698
00:43:08,127 --> 00:43:10,922
So be it. Tuesdays at 3:00, then,
with our fingers crossed.
699
00:43:12,340 --> 00:43:13,466
Today is Tuesday.
700
00:43:15,218 --> 00:43:18,888
Ah, well, I wouldn't have been able
to see her again today, I'm afraid,
701
00:43:18,888 --> 00:43:21,349
as she'd have needed a week
in which to do me an essay.
702
00:43:21,933 --> 00:43:25,645
Poor Mrs. Grainger.
But I'm all right, as I've done one.
703
00:43:26,020 --> 00:43:28,231
I haven't put a title on, but I thought,
704
00:43:28,231 --> 00:43:30,566
"Hate and Redemption in A Winter's Tale. "
705
00:43:32,360 --> 00:43:34,821
Hmm. Needs work, that title.
706
00:43:37,115 --> 00:43:39,367
Don't you want to read it
before the tutorial?
707
00:43:39,826 --> 00:43:42,203
No, no.
You'll have to read it aloud to me.
708
00:43:43,287 --> 00:43:45,706
Unless-- I tell you what.
Leave it here with me,
709
00:43:45,706 --> 00:43:49,210
and I'll do my damnedest
to have it read by next week.
710
00:43:56,342 --> 00:43:59,595
No, I'll read it aloud.
Three o'clock, then?
711
00:44:09,147 --> 00:44:10,148
Bugger.
712
00:44:13,734 --> 00:44:16,904
"Hate and Redemption.“
I told you she was mad.
713
00:44:19,949 --> 00:44:22,910
She must be a secret agent
in Edna's employ.
714
00:44:27,248 --> 00:44:28,332
"Hate and Redemption,“
715
00:44:29,125 --> 00:44:31,627
"Pity and Terror," "Sin and Salvation."
716
00:44:32,378 --> 00:44:34,755
"Faith and Despair
in Pride and Prejudice,"
717
00:44:34,755 --> 00:44:38,009
The Mill on the Floss,
Appley Dapply, Cecily Parsley!
718
00:44:42,805 --> 00:44:47,351
Why don't these cleaning women
do their job properly?
719
00:44:49,228 --> 00:44:51,480
Standards are declining everywhere.
720
00:44:53,733 --> 00:44:55,568
John Stuart Mill's cleaning woman
721
00:44:56,027 --> 00:44:59,280
threw Carter's
History of the French Revolution
722
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:00,740
out with the other rubbish!
723
00:45:04,118 --> 00:45:07,788
But then they took a pride
in their work in those days.
724
00:45:13,878 --> 00:45:16,214
I should think Reg would enjoy
cooking my kidneys.
725
00:45:18,841 --> 00:45:20,760
Sounds worse than settling my hash.
726
00:45:21,552 --> 00:45:24,805
Anne's mother, the mad monk,
settles the hash
727
00:45:25,514 --> 00:45:28,351
of bus conductors, milkmen, postmen,
728
00:45:28,351 --> 00:45:31,103
anyone stupid enough
to waste their time insulting her.
729
00:45:32,063 --> 00:45:34,190
"Oh, I settled his hash all; right. Oh!"
730
00:45:36,317 --> 00:45:38,903
She must have got the taste for it
after she killed off her husband.
731
00:45:40,154 --> 00:45:42,615
I wonder if there was any reference
in the coroner's report
732
00:45:42,615 --> 00:45:44,200
as to the state of his hash.
733
00:45:47,203 --> 00:45:49,538
Oh, this hash, my life...
734
00:45:50,915 --> 00:45:53,668
this long disease, my...
735
00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:01,842
Why the hell did we call her Marina?
736
00:46:05,429 --> 00:46:09,475
"I made this, I have forgotten
And remember.
737
00:46:11,185 --> 00:46:13,854
The rigging weak and the canvas rotten
738
00:46:15,439 --> 00:46:18,442
Between one June and another September."
739
00:46:20,903 --> 00:46:21,862
Born in June.
740
00:46:22,321 --> 00:46:25,992
June, April, May, February, November.
741
00:46:27,743 --> 00:46:31,414
Conceived in September,
so sometime in early September,
742
00:46:31,414 --> 00:46:35,918
there was what you might call...
a seminal fuck.
743
00:46:39,714 --> 00:46:40,715
Where?
744
00:46:42,466 --> 00:46:43,718
In the park once, we...
745
00:46:44,760 --> 00:46:45,803
Let me think.
746
00:46:48,514 --> 00:46:50,516
Beneath the trees.
747
00:46:52,852 --> 00:46:58,107
"Beneath the trees there is no ease
For the dull brain, the sharp desires
748
00:46:58,107 --> 00:47:01,527
And the quick eyes of Woolly Bear."
749
00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:09,452
"It must have been our last,
we were already fallen into the sere,
750
00:47:11,829 --> 00:47:12,872
the yellow leaf,
751
00:47:16,083 --> 00:47:18,461
a flash of thigh in the yellow leaf.
752
00:47:20,921 --> 00:47:25,634
What seas, what shores,
what granite islands toward my timbers
753
00:47:26,052 --> 00:47:28,846
And woodthrush calling through the fog
754
00:47:34,018 --> 00:47:34,977
My daughter."
755
00:47:40,066 --> 00:47:41,233
You do miss her then?
756
00:47:45,363 --> 00:47:47,573
You know, what marks you out
757
00:47:47,573 --> 00:47:50,868
as being a repressed
as well as a practising pervert
758
00:47:50,868 --> 00:47:52,620
is your sentimentality over children.
759
00:47:53,913 --> 00:47:55,664
Marina doesn't need a mother or a father.
760
00:47:55,664 --> 00:47:58,167
She needs a pair of hands
to pick her up and change her
761
00:47:58,167 --> 00:48:00,294
and put things to her mouth
and put her down again.
762
00:48:00,294 --> 00:48:01,962
But later on she might need a father.
763
00:48:02,380 --> 00:48:07,051
You generally have the taste to let me
raise the subject of my ruined marriage.
764
00:48:08,427 --> 00:48:10,388
I can't help wondering
whether you miss it.
765
00:48:10,888 --> 00:48:12,390
Only the sex and violence.
766
00:48:13,432 --> 00:48:15,643
And these days,
you can get those anywhere.
767
00:48:15,643 --> 00:48:16,894
So there's absolutely no chance.
768
00:48:17,353 --> 00:48:18,813
Chance of what?
769
00:48:18,813 --> 00:48:20,815
Of your marriage reviving.
You don't want it to?
770
00:48:21,148 --> 00:48:24,860
Reviving? It's never died.
I consider it inviolate.
771
00:48:25,736 --> 00:48:28,030
I'm a one-woman man, and I've had mine.
Thank God.
772
00:48:28,364 --> 00:48:30,658
But things can't just go on as they are.
773
00:48:30,658 --> 00:48:32,118
Oh, can't they? Why not?
774
00:48:32,618 --> 00:48:34,286
But suppose she wants to marry again.
775
00:48:35,079 --> 00:48:36,705
Oh, good God. Who would want to marry her?
776
00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:38,124
You did.
777
00:48:38,582 --> 00:48:40,543
Oh, well, that was before
she'd been through the mill.
778
00:48:41,127 --> 00:48:43,504
Listen, Ben, you could be
making a mistake about Anne.
779
00:48:43,879 --> 00:48:45,423
If you really don't want to lose her--
780
00:48:45,423 --> 00:48:47,466
You know,
your conversation's beginning to sound
781
00:48:47,466 --> 00:48:50,177
as if it's been stitched together
with song titles from the '505.
782
00:48:50,678 --> 00:48:52,638
Making a mistake about Anne
783
00:48:52,638 --> 00:48:55,391
If you really don't want to lose her
784
00:48:55,891 --> 00:48:57,685
Ben, I'm trying to tell you something.
785
00:48:57,685 --> 00:48:59,478
Haylife and Forlings
786
00:48:59,937 --> 00:49:05,317
Three-four-one-two-one-two-one
787
00:49:05,317 --> 00:49:06,610
What are you doing?
788
00:49:06,610 --> 00:49:08,779
Haylife and Forlings.
789
00:49:08,779 --> 00:49:12,116
Could I speak to Mr. Nuttall, please?
Mr. Reg Nuttall.
790
00:49:12,116 --> 00:49:13,909
-I told you. He's not there.
-Thank you.
791
00:49:16,162 --> 00:49:17,872
Waiting for Mr. Nuttall. Thank you.
792
00:49:17,872 --> 00:49:19,457
All right. All right. I'll do it.
793
00:49:27,089 --> 00:49:28,174
Well?
794
00:49:28,883 --> 00:49:30,551
Do you intend to stay in the room
while I find out
795
00:49:30,551 --> 00:49:31,635
if he'll have you to dinner?
796
00:49:32,803 --> 00:49:34,054
Certainly.
797
00:49:34,054 --> 00:49:35,931
But you needn't stay while I find out.
798
00:49:36,265 --> 00:49:37,349
I said I'd do it.
799
00:49:39,185 --> 00:49:40,519
What are you afraid of?
800
00:49:41,228 --> 00:49:44,857
He can only say no, in which case
I'll only make your life a living hell.
801
00:49:44,857 --> 00:49:46,525
Or perhaps I'm afraid he'll say yes.
802
00:49:46,525 --> 00:49:48,944
Oh, you do worry for him, don't you, dear?
803
00:49:48,944 --> 00:49:50,779
Why do you think it's him I'm worried for?
804
00:49:50,779 --> 00:49:53,324
Well,
we all' know how you worry for yourself.
805
00:49:55,326 --> 00:49:57,286
Ben, you're a fool. You're a bloody fool.
806
00:50:01,290 --> 00:50:03,584
Butley, Nursery.
807
00:50:03,584 --> 00:50:05,002
Oh, James, I'm sorry.
808
00:50:06,003 --> 00:50:08,297
No, no, I was just pondering those lines.
809
00:50:08,297 --> 00:50:10,758
“His rhythm was present
in the nursery bedroom,
810
00:50:10,758 --> 00:50:13,260
In the rank ailanthus
of the April dooryard."
811
00:50:14,553 --> 00:50:16,388
No, no, I'm quite free. Mmm.
812
00:50:16,388 --> 00:50:18,182
What do you know about
this Gardner business?
813
00:50:18,182 --> 00:50:20,684
Gardner?
814
00:50:20,684 --> 00:50:22,102
Gardner, Gardner, Gardner.
815
00:50:22,102 --> 00:50:25,105
No, I don't recall a student
called Gardner. What year is she?
816
00:50:26,398 --> 00:50:27,733
Ah, he.
817
00:50:29,610 --> 00:50:30,778
Oh, God!
818
00:50:33,030 --> 00:50:34,990
Poor Edna.
819
00:50:35,824 --> 00:50:36,909
Block that student.
820
00:50:39,328 --> 00:50:43,040
He says I what?
821
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:44,792
No, look, he must have misunderstood me.
822
00:50:44,792 --> 00:50:46,752
I certainly don't remember
telling a Gardner
823
00:50:46,752 --> 00:50:49,421
that I would give him Eliot tutorials
instead of--
824
00:50:53,384 --> 00:50:55,553
James, I'm sorry.
I appear to have miscalculated.
825
00:50:55,553 --> 00:50:57,304
I have a student after all.
826
00:51:00,558 --> 00:51:03,018
Speak to you later, eh? Bye.
827
00:51:06,939 --> 00:51:07,898
How are you?
828
00:51:08,732 --> 00:51:10,693
Thank you. And you?
829
00:51:12,403 --> 00:51:15,489
Coping with Edna. Do you remember Edna?
830
00:51:15,948 --> 00:51:18,617
The one you used to call
a human contraceptive?
831
00:51:19,243 --> 00:51:22,288
- Actually, I called her a pill.
- Ah.
832
00:51:23,455 --> 00:51:24,748
Well, I updated you.
833
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:28,919
How are you, Joey?
834
00:51:29,336 --> 00:51:30,629
Oh, very well', thanks.
835
00:51:31,672 --> 00:51:33,424
-How's Miranda?
-Marina.
836
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:36,635
She fills her belly and her nappy.
837
00:51:37,428 --> 00:51:39,430
She grows the odd tooth. She cries.
838
00:51:41,473 --> 00:51:42,474
How adult.
839
00:51:43,767 --> 00:51:45,728
Except for the odd tooth, of course,
one loses that.
840
00:51:47,938 --> 00:51:50,858
Actually, I've been thinking
of finding a new dentist.
841
00:51:52,860 --> 00:51:56,405
I know you dote on Tonks, darling,
but he's terribly camp.
842
00:51:56,405 --> 00:51:59,199
One sits in that chair
with one's whole body at his mercy.
843
00:52:02,953 --> 00:52:05,539
-Who do you go to?
-A man in Pimlico.
844
00:52:06,915 --> 00:52:09,376
Joey's teeth are always
in marvelous condition.
845
00:52:09,376 --> 00:52:10,711
Are they? Let's see.
846
00:52:10,711 --> 00:52:12,546
-What?
-Let's see your teeth.
847
00:52:15,132 --> 00:52:19,219
Oh, yes, quite right. They sparkle.
Only, from time to time, I have noticed...
848
00:52:24,183 --> 00:52:26,602
One of Ben's marriage jokes.
I'm surprised you haven't heard it.
849
00:52:27,227 --> 00:52:28,187
Well, I haven't.
850
00:52:28,812 --> 00:52:30,064
How flattering for me.
851
00:52:31,398 --> 00:52:32,524
Yes, well, I think I'd better--
852
00:52:33,525 --> 00:52:34,735
I'd better get along.
853
00:52:34,735 --> 00:52:36,737
-Oh, why?
-Because he's embarrassed.
854
00:52:36,737 --> 00:52:37,905
Are you?
855
00:52:37,905 --> 00:52:40,491
- I've got a lecture.
- He has, yes.
856
00:52:40,491 --> 00:52:42,868
-On Blake.
-Ah. Then he'd better go.
857
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:54,338
He's very sensitive. You frighten him.
858
00:52:56,924 --> 00:52:58,926
Because he's creepy,
and he knows I know it.
859
00:52:58,926 --> 00:53:01,845
Yes, I know. I told him.
He took it surprisingly badly.
860
00:53:05,224 --> 00:53:07,726
You've settled down nicely together again,
then, have you?
861
00:53:07,726 --> 00:53:09,395
We have our ups and downs.
862
00:53:09,937 --> 00:53:11,605
That's all right then. May I sit?
863
00:53:13,107 --> 00:53:16,652
I came to see you over the weekend,
as arranged, but you were out.
864
00:53:17,611 --> 00:53:18,570
Yes, I'm sorry.
865
00:53:19,113 --> 00:53:21,240
Grounds for a scene, though,
don't you think?
866
00:53:21,740 --> 00:53:22,700
Oh, I should wait.
867
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,037
I had to see Tom's headmaster about a job.
868
00:53:28,789 --> 00:53:31,375
-Oh. Did you get one?
-Yes.
869
00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:34,002
Good.
870
00:53:36,463 --> 00:53:39,258
But you're looking a trifle peaky
around the gills, wherever they are.
871
00:53:39,258 --> 00:53:40,509
I can never locate them on Joey.
872
00:53:42,469 --> 00:53:43,429
Are you all right?
873
00:53:44,430 --> 00:53:45,389
I'm fine.
874
00:53:45,848 --> 00:53:47,141
Oh, good.
875
00:53:51,895 --> 00:53:54,857
Well', now, this is almost as delightful
as it is unexpected.
876
00:53:57,067 --> 00:53:58,318
To what is it owed?
877
00:54:01,947 --> 00:54:04,199
I came to find out
whether you wanted us back.
878
00:54:08,537 --> 00:54:09,496
Is that an offer?
879
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:12,916
No. It's a question.
880
00:54:14,293 --> 00:54:15,544
I'd like the truth, please.
881
00:54:16,587 --> 00:54:17,629
Do you want us back?
882
00:54:20,174 --> 00:54:21,133
Frequently.
883
00:54:22,384 --> 00:54:23,886
But not permanently.
884
00:54:26,013 --> 00:54:27,139
Do you want to come back?
885
00:54:29,141 --> 00:54:30,100
No.
886
00:54:32,519 --> 00:54:33,729
We've cleared that up, then.
887
00:54:34,897 --> 00:54:37,691
I think we're going to get on very well
from this time forth, don't you?
888
00:54:39,568 --> 00:54:40,819
Joey hasn't told you, then?
889
00:54:42,321 --> 00:54:43,280
Told me what?
890
00:54:44,323 --> 00:54:46,366
He's known for weeks. His--
891
00:54:47,493 --> 00:54:49,661
what's his name--
friend Reg must have told him.
892
00:54:50,829 --> 00:54:51,789
Reg?
893
00:54:52,331 --> 00:54:53,415
Tom told him.
894
00:54:54,500 --> 00:54:56,043
At least, he told me he had.
895
00:54:56,502 --> 00:54:57,586
Tom?
896
00:54:58,587 --> 00:54:59,838
Tom and Reg?
897
00:55:00,964 --> 00:55:03,926
What on earth have Tom and Reg
got to do with us?
898
00:55:05,594 --> 00:55:06,762
He's asked me to marry him.
899
00:55:11,642 --> 00:55:12,643
Which one?
900
00:55:15,854 --> 00:55:16,897
You're not.
901
00:55:18,440 --> 00:55:19,858
You can't be!
902
00:55:20,859 --> 00:55:22,236
Yes, I am.
903
00:55:23,403 --> 00:55:24,363
Do you mind?
904
00:55:25,739 --> 00:55:28,742
Yes, yes, I mind very much.
905
00:55:38,585 --> 00:55:41,713
After all, a man is bound to be judged
by his wife's husband.
906
00:55:43,549 --> 00:55:45,259
The most boring man in London--
907
00:55:45,259 --> 00:55:48,303
You said yourself he was the dullest man
you'd ever spent an evening with.
908
00:55:49,680 --> 00:55:51,515
That was before
I got to know him properly.
909
00:55:51,515 --> 00:55:52,724
What do you call him now?
910
00:55:53,267 --> 00:55:55,352
The dullest man
I ever spent the night with.
911
00:55:57,229 --> 00:55:58,480
But I don't mind. Why should you?
912
00:56:00,399 --> 00:56:01,358
Because...
913
00:56:04,403 --> 00:56:07,322
Because I shall miss old Tom. That's why.
914
00:56:09,241 --> 00:56:12,536
I'm too old to start
mature new friendships with bores,
915
00:56:12,536 --> 00:56:13,620
far too impatient.
916
00:56:13,620 --> 00:56:17,958
They have to grow on you hour by hour,
steadily through, year on years,
917
00:56:18,584 --> 00:56:21,461
until they're actually doing their bit
towards holding you together.
918
00:56:21,461 --> 00:56:23,797
Like ivy around crumbling walls.
919
00:56:24,673 --> 00:56:25,924
Is that why you want him?
920
00:56:30,012 --> 00:56:32,389
-Are you going to make difficulties?
-What?
921
00:56:32,931 --> 00:56:34,182
About the divorce?
922
00:56:36,059 --> 00:56:37,060
Divorce?
923
00:56:37,603 --> 00:56:41,356
You see, I'm not allowed to marry him
until I'm divorced from you.
924
00:56:41,356 --> 00:56:42,566
It's the law of the land.
925
00:56:43,191 --> 00:56:44,568
Are you going to make difficulties?
926
00:56:48,030 --> 00:56:49,489
This is humiliating.
927
00:56:51,074 --> 00:56:52,034
But deserved.
928
00:56:52,951 --> 00:56:53,911
By both of us.
929
00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,378
I'll bloody make difficulties all right.
930
00:57:04,588 --> 00:57:08,300
After all, this is liable to be the only
phase of our marriage that I shall enjoy.
931
00:57:09,551 --> 00:57:11,386
At least since the moment
in the registry office
932
00:57:11,386 --> 00:57:13,972
when the clerk who handled our contract
was under the impression
933
00:57:13,972 --> 00:57:16,183
that he was supposed to bind me
for a year or two
934
00:57:16,183 --> 00:57:17,517
to the mad monk, your mother.
935
00:57:18,852 --> 00:57:20,938
I'll have to have my fun somewhere,
won't I?
936
00:57:20,938 --> 00:57:25,025
After all, one moment of pleasure
is not much out of a whole year, is it?
937
00:57:26,193 --> 00:57:27,778
It's a moment more than I had.
938
00:57:30,113 --> 00:57:33,325
How many moments do you expect
from your next?
939
00:57:34,826 --> 00:57:35,911
I shan't count them.
940
00:57:37,120 --> 00:57:38,664
I'm not in it for fun, you see.
941
00:57:39,331 --> 00:57:40,374
I never was.
942
00:57:41,416 --> 00:57:42,417
And nor were you.
943
00:57:44,628 --> 00:57:47,172
Oh. What was I in it for, then?
944
00:57:49,508 --> 00:57:51,051
Perhaps you wanted a break.
945
00:57:53,053 --> 00:57:56,098
Well, I'm certainly getting one, aren't I?
946
00:57:56,932 --> 00:57:58,100
Or perhaps you were frightened.
947
00:58:00,143 --> 00:58:02,437
But it doesn't matter anymore
because you're not anymore.
948
00:58:03,605 --> 00:58:05,232
And I suppose you needn't ever try again,
949
00:58:05,232 --> 00:58:09,027
now that you've found out whatever it is
you were determined to learn.
950
00:58:13,490 --> 00:58:16,118
I don't care. Not at all.
951
00:58:21,540 --> 00:58:23,291
Then you're halfway there.
952
00:58:24,751 --> 00:58:27,796
And Tom will certainly teach you
to sit still.
953
00:58:34,428 --> 00:58:38,056
Look, if you must get married again,
surely we can do better for you than that.
954
00:58:38,807 --> 00:58:41,852
After six weeks, you'll be
the two most boring men in London.
955
00:58:42,602 --> 00:58:45,939
There are signs of it already.
You're developing a new tone,
956
00:58:45,939 --> 00:58:50,277
a combination of the didactic
and the enigmatically stoic
957
00:58:50,777 --> 00:58:54,656
that's more than halfway
towards Tom's prose style.
958
00:58:56,783 --> 00:59:00,287
Tell me. Does he know that
you greet spring and its signs of life
959
00:59:00,287 --> 00:59:02,956
with wheezing and sneezes
from your hay fever?
960
00:59:04,041 --> 00:59:08,712
Tom endorses spring.
He admires it for its moral exuberance.
961
00:59:10,630 --> 00:59:13,341
Do you still make little popping sounds
when you drink your coffee?
962
00:59:15,343 --> 00:59:18,472
No, it's your nose,
your nose I've always taken exception to,
963
00:59:18,472 --> 00:59:19,723
or is it your mouth?
964
00:59:24,394 --> 00:59:27,397
You can't marry Tom.
965
00:59:29,733 --> 00:59:30,734
I can.
966
00:59:32,319 --> 00:59:33,904
Well, yes, you probably can.
967
00:59:33,904 --> 00:59:35,947
You can probably do
a lot of hideous things.
968
00:59:35,947 --> 00:59:38,116
You're tough, versatile and brutal.
969
00:59:39,117 --> 00:59:40,118
What I mean is...
970
00:59:43,747 --> 00:59:44,790
don't.
971
00:59:46,875 --> 00:59:47,834
Why not?
972
00:59:52,005 --> 00:59:52,964
Well?
973
01:00:00,972 --> 01:00:04,101
-Can I have a word?
-Oh, by all means, yes.
974
01:00:04,726 --> 01:00:07,187
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize.
975
01:00:08,355 --> 01:00:09,898
I'll look back later, if I may.
976
01:00:17,823 --> 01:00:19,908
He's asked me to live with him
until we get married.
977
01:00:21,910 --> 01:00:23,078
Are you going to make trouble?
978
01:00:27,249 --> 01:00:29,251
By the way, when did we last have it off?
979
01:00:31,128 --> 01:00:33,630
Was it that time in the park,
beneath the trees,
980
01:00:34,548 --> 01:00:38,844
or did we have a quick go subsequently
in bed or under the kitchen table?
981
01:00:38,844 --> 01:00:40,637
Joey and I were trying to work it out.
982
01:00:50,063 --> 01:00:52,983
You're going to live with him
until you get married, did you say?
983
01:00:55,026 --> 01:00:57,404
At least that's a realistic prospectus.
984
01:01:03,243 --> 01:01:04,494
Bye-bye, darling.
985
01:01:06,538 --> 01:01:07,539
Bye-bye.
986
01:01:09,499 --> 01:01:12,294
Bye-bye, sweet princess.
987
01:01:15,255 --> 01:01:16,506
Goodbye!
988
01:01:32,230 --> 01:01:34,482
Butley is himself again.
989
01:01:38,486 --> 01:01:41,364
♪ Christ, your breath is bad today ♪
990
01:01:41,364 --> 01:01:43,909
♪ Haa-aa-al-it-osis ♪
991
01:01:44,075 --> 01:01:47,078
♪ Haa-aa-al-it-o-- ♪
992
01:01:52,042 --> 01:01:53,001
Bloody woman.
993
01:01:54,586 --> 01:01:55,795
Bloody woman.
994
01:02:32,207 --> 01:02:33,250
So are you coming or what?
995
01:03:21,840 --> 01:03:23,883
"Hermione's reawakening--
996
01:03:25,010 --> 01:03:30,140
the statue restored to life
after a winter of 16 years' duration--
997
01:03:30,640 --> 01:03:35,520
is in reality Leontes's reawakening,
spiritually,
998
01:03:36,146 --> 01:03:38,898
and of course
the most moving exemplification
999
01:03:39,065 --> 01:03:43,153
of both the revitalization theme
and thus of forgiveness
1000
01:03:43,528 --> 01:03:46,614
on the theological
as well as the human level."
1001
01:03:46,614 --> 01:03:48,450
-Level?
-Yes.
1002
01:03:49,868 --> 01:03:52,370
-The human level?
-Yes.
1003
01:03:54,748 --> 01:03:56,541
Um, shall I go on?
1004
01:03:59,085 --> 01:04:00,628
Mmm.
1005
01:04:02,547 --> 01:04:05,425
"The central image is drawn from nature,
1006
01:04:05,425 --> 01:04:08,178
to counterpoint the imagery
of the first half of the play,
1007
01:04:08,720 --> 01:04:11,222
with its stress on sickness and deformity.
1008
01:04:11,806 --> 01:04:15,310
Paradoxically,
A Winter's Tale of a frozen soul..."
1009
01:04:15,310 --> 01:04:17,312
Bit fishmongery, that.
1010
01:04:20,940 --> 01:04:25,904
“...is therefore thematically
and symbolically about revitalization."
1011
01:04:25,904 --> 01:04:27,614
Sorry. Re-what-alization?
1012
01:04:28,782 --> 01:04:29,908
Revitalization.
1013
01:04:33,244 --> 01:04:35,121
Thematically...
1014
01:04:36,373 --> 01:04:38,375
and symbolically so, eh?
1015
01:04:39,584 --> 01:04:40,543
Yes.
1016
01:04:42,087 --> 01:04:43,088
Hmm.
1017
01:04:44,672 --> 01:04:47,384
"The central image--" Um, no.
1018
01:04:48,426 --> 01:04:50,804
Uh, had that. "In this context--"
1019
01:04:50,804 --> 01:04:51,846
Can you see?
1020
01:04:52,680 --> 01:04:53,807
-What?
-There.
1021
01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:01,773
Oh, sorry. No irony intended.
1022
01:05:03,400 --> 01:05:04,359
"Context. "
1023
01:05:05,902 --> 01:05:06,903
Um...
1024
01:05:09,072 --> 01:05:10,031
Yes.
1025
01:05:12,659 --> 01:05:14,744
"In this context, it might be said
1026
01:05:14,744 --> 01:05:19,082
that Leontes represents the affliction
that is a universal,
1027
01:05:19,499 --> 01:05:23,795
and so contingently human evil,
1028
01:05:24,504 --> 01:05:26,881
and in this sense,
the sense of a shared blight——"
1029
01:05:30,593 --> 01:05:32,220
A shared blight. Yes.
1030
01:05:33,805 --> 01:05:36,141
How much longer is it, exactly?
1031
01:05:37,308 --> 01:05:38,768
Uh, look.
1032
01:05:39,769 --> 01:05:41,271
I tell you what,
1033
01:05:41,271 --> 01:05:44,190
as our time together
is drawing to a close,
1034
01:05:45,024 --> 01:05:50,113
read the last two or three sentences
so we can get the feel of your conclusion.
1035
01:05:59,497 --> 01:06:00,707
Ready?
1036
01:06:00,999 --> 01:06:03,042
Please, please.
1037
01:06:07,255 --> 01:06:11,092
"So just as the seasonal winter
was the winter of the soul,
1038
01:06:11,092 --> 01:06:14,345
so is the seasonal spring
the spring of the soul.
1039
01:06:14,345 --> 01:06:17,390
The imagery changes
from disease to floral,
1040
01:06:17,390 --> 01:06:20,894
the tone from mad bitterness
to joyfulness.
1041
01:06:20,894 --> 01:06:26,483
As we reach the plays climax,
we feel our own spiritual sap rising."
1042
01:06:30,403 --> 01:06:31,488
"Sap"?
1043
01:06:34,407 --> 01:06:35,366
Sap.
1044
01:06:36,242 --> 01:06:38,077
Sap. Sap.
1045
01:06:40,872 --> 01:06:43,166
Yes, I think perhaps sap
is a better word there
1046
01:06:43,166 --> 01:06:45,668
than some others
that spring rhymingly to mind.
1047
01:06:49,631 --> 01:06:50,798
Good.
1048
01:06:53,468 --> 01:06:56,513
Well, thank you very much.
1049
01:07:02,936 --> 01:07:06,981
What do you want to do?
I mean, after your exams.
1050
01:07:07,774 --> 01:07:08,733
Teach.
1051
01:07:11,277 --> 01:07:12,779
-English?
-Yes.
1052
01:07:15,073 --> 01:07:18,660
Yes, I suppose that is more radical
than being a teacher of exams,
1053
01:07:19,369 --> 01:07:22,038
for which I think
you're already qualified, by the way.
1054
01:07:22,497 --> 01:07:24,874
I hope you'll take that as a compliment.
1055
01:07:27,126 --> 01:07:29,337
It isn't meant to be one, is it?
1056
01:07:30,380 --> 01:07:32,465
But whatever you think of my essay,
1057
01:07:32,465 --> 01:07:36,427
unless I do well in the exams,
I might not be able to be a teacher.
1058
01:07:37,303 --> 01:07:38,763
Teacher of whom?
1059
01:07:38,763 --> 01:07:40,598
Sixth forms, I hope.
1060
01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:45,395
Isn't it more exhilarating
to catch them earlier?
1061
01:07:45,395 --> 01:07:47,522
Sixth-form teachers are something like
1062
01:07:47,522 --> 01:07:51,234
firemen called in to quench flames
that are already out.
1063
01:07:53,486 --> 01:07:55,947
What do you want to do next week?
1064
01:07:55,947 --> 01:07:59,117
We have to cover
at least six Shakespeares.
1065
01:07:59,826 --> 01:08:03,955
Oh, from what I've heard already,
Shakespeare's as good as covered.
1066
01:08:11,129 --> 01:08:14,090
Could you please write
some comments on this?
1067
01:08:15,883 --> 01:08:18,052
It's a good thing to be merciless.
1068
01:08:18,052 --> 01:08:20,305
It comes in useful
when dealing with the young.
1069
01:08:20,888 --> 01:08:23,641
Believe it or not,
you can be as rude as you like.
1070
01:08:23,641 --> 01:08:24,976
I don't take it personally.
1071
01:08:26,811 --> 01:08:29,897
That's another good way
of taking the fun out of teaching.
1072
01:08:30,648 --> 01:08:32,233
Good afternoon, Miss Heasman.
1073
01:08:46,039 --> 01:08:47,790
Oh, Christ.
1074
01:08:53,421 --> 01:08:55,131
Bloody girl!
1075
01:09:22,200 --> 01:09:24,911
Tap tap-pit, tap tap-pit,
he's heard it before.
1076
01:09:25,495 --> 01:09:28,831
But when he peeps out,
there's nobody there,
1077
01:09:28,831 --> 01:09:31,501
but packets and whimsy
put down on the stair.
1078
01:09:32,210 --> 01:09:34,087
Or is something frightening him again?
1079
01:09:34,420 --> 01:09:37,131
Is that why he's peeping
through the frosted glass
1080
01:09:37,131 --> 01:09:39,509
with his whiskers twitching
and his paws to his nose?
1081
01:09:40,259 --> 01:09:42,512
If it's Anne you are hiding from,
she's gone.
1082
01:09:42,512 --> 01:09:44,681
If it's Edna, she has not arrived.
1083
01:09:44,681 --> 01:09:46,683
-I thought you and Anne might still be--
-What?
1084
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:50,019
Thrashing it out? Having it off?
1085
01:09:53,648 --> 01:09:57,360
What would Anne and I still be doing
together in a small room after two hours?
1086
01:09:57,360 --> 01:10:00,279
She was always succinct,
even with her knickers down.
1087
01:10:03,241 --> 01:10:06,411
I saw Edna in the common room.
She was just leaving as I went in.
1088
01:10:07,286 --> 01:10:09,455
Oh, how did she look? Jovial?
1089
01:10:09,914 --> 01:10:11,416
-No, very upset.
-Ah.
1090
01:10:13,042 --> 01:10:14,877
Was that Miss Heasman
I passed in the corridor?
1091
01:10:15,795 --> 01:10:17,547
How did she seem? Jovial?
1092
01:10:18,589 --> 01:10:20,883
She had her face averted
as if she were in tears.
1093
01:10:21,384 --> 01:10:23,469
Then that was certainly Miss Heasman, yes.
1094
01:10:24,595 --> 01:10:27,765
Everything seems to be running smoothly,
doesn't it?
1095
01:10:30,184 --> 01:10:31,185
Tell me.
1096
01:10:32,270 --> 01:10:35,940
What did you make of old Anne turning up
in that enterprising fashion?
1097
01:10:35,940 --> 01:10:37,734
-I don't know.
-Don't you?
1098
01:10:39,652 --> 01:10:44,240
She was under the impression
that you have known for some time.
1099
01:10:46,284 --> 01:10:47,618
I did try to warn you.
1100
01:10:48,161 --> 01:10:49,829
Yes, and thank you.
1101
01:10:52,373 --> 01:10:54,250
How come you've known for some time?
1102
01:10:56,169 --> 01:10:57,420
Well, actually, I got it from Reg.
1103
01:10:59,338 --> 01:11:01,591
From Reg? Yes?
1104
01:11:01,924 --> 01:11:03,968
Tom's meeting Reg
had nothing to do with me.
1105
01:11:03,968 --> 01:11:05,678
It was something professional.
I don't know what.
1106
01:11:05,970 --> 01:11:09,515
But they got on very well
and Tom told Reg and Reg told me,
1107
01:11:09,515 --> 01:11:11,642
and then Tom phoned Reg
and told Reg not to tell me,
1108
01:11:11,642 --> 01:11:13,019
or if he had told me,
1109
01:11:13,019 --> 01:11:15,438
to ask me not to tell you
until he or Anne had told you.
1110
01:11:18,441 --> 01:11:21,903
Yes, I recognize Tom's delicate touch
there in your sentence structure.
1111
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:25,198
It must have been amusing to hear me
1112
01:11:25,198 --> 01:11:28,242
chatter mindlessly on
about my marriage, eh?
1113
01:11:28,910 --> 01:11:30,244
I tried to warn you.
1114
01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:31,913
But was it amusing?
1115
01:11:32,830 --> 01:11:33,915
Was it fun?
1116
01:11:38,252 --> 01:11:39,879
Are you going to answer me?
1117
01:11:40,922 --> 01:11:42,799
Sorry.
I took the question to be rhetorical.
1118
01:11:43,633 --> 01:11:45,510
All right. Let me ask you, then,
1119
01:11:45,510 --> 01:11:48,012
why you promised
not to mention to your best friend--
1120
01:11:48,012 --> 01:11:51,140
is that presuming--
that his wife was being screwed by,
1121
01:11:51,140 --> 01:11:54,227
while contemplating marriage to,
the most boring man in London?
1122
01:11:54,227 --> 01:11:56,437
Is that question
sufficiently unrhetorical?
1123
01:11:56,437 --> 01:11:58,272
Because I didn't think it was my business.
1124
01:11:58,272 --> 01:11:59,357
Not your business?
1125
01:11:59,357 --> 01:12:02,276
And how many personalities and dramas
over which we've gossiped and whinnied
1126
01:12:02,276 --> 01:12:04,403
in the past few years
have been our business?
1127
01:12:04,403 --> 01:12:07,323
There have been some pretty sticky
silences between us recently,
1128
01:12:07,323 --> 01:12:10,201
and here you were, my clear,
in possession of a piece of information
1129
01:12:10,201 --> 01:12:13,246
that was guaranteed to raise,
at the very least, an amused eyebrow.
1130
01:12:13,246 --> 01:12:15,414
All right, because I'm a coward.
That's why. I'm sorry.
1131
01:12:17,375 --> 01:12:19,210
I am sorry, in point of fact.
1132
01:12:20,545 --> 01:12:24,715
Matters of fact and points of fact
have been cluttering your syntax
1133
01:12:24,715 --> 01:12:27,051
ever since you started going steady
with that butcher's boy.
1134
01:12:27,468 --> 01:12:29,387
I'm sorry
because I hoped it wouldn't happen.
1135
01:12:30,054 --> 01:12:32,014
Now it's a fact, and I wish it weren't.
1136
01:12:33,724 --> 01:12:35,184
I'm sure you could get her back.
1137
01:12:36,894 --> 01:12:37,854
How far back?
1138
01:12:39,146 --> 01:12:40,898
To live with you. She and Marina.
1139
01:12:41,774 --> 01:12:44,193
Oh, that's too far back. Far too far back.
1140
01:12:45,653 --> 01:12:46,863
Then what will you do?
1141
01:12:49,532 --> 01:12:52,159
Grab my quota of fun. That's all.
1142
01:12:52,660 --> 01:12:54,912
I'm working to a very tight schedule.
1143
01:12:54,912 --> 01:12:56,497
I've given myself a mere week
1144
01:12:56,497 --> 01:12:59,208
in which to get the most tenacious
and boring man in London
1145
01:12:59,208 --> 01:13:00,543
out of his job and home.
1146
01:13:00,835 --> 01:13:02,962
I'm starting on his landlady now.
1147
01:13:03,546 --> 01:13:04,589
"Fun"?
1148
01:13:05,590 --> 01:13:08,467
Or trouble. I can't remember
which I've promised myself.
1149
01:13:08,467 --> 01:13:10,261
But what's the point of making trouble?
1150
01:13:11,178 --> 01:13:12,138
Fun.
1151
01:13:12,513 --> 01:13:15,099
Because hounding them from job and home
is no trouble.
1152
01:13:16,225 --> 01:13:18,644
Local councils, police,
whole governments do it.
1153
01:13:18,644 --> 01:13:20,980
Why shouldn't a private citizen
be allowed to join in?
1154
01:13:22,732 --> 01:13:24,108
Oh, where are you going, eh?
1155
01:13:25,610 --> 01:13:27,361
The library's open now.
I thought I'd go up.
1156
01:13:27,361 --> 01:13:32,116
And hide again, eh? Who from this time?
Edna. Ah, yes, it must be from Edna.
1157
01:13:32,950 --> 01:13:35,161
Well, I'm not going to be here
when she comes to have it out with you.
1158
01:13:35,161 --> 01:13:36,746
-Oh.
-I can't help it.
1159
01:13:36,746 --> 01:13:38,414
I'm not going to antagonize her.
1160
01:13:38,414 --> 01:13:40,917
Don't worry. I'll do it for you.
You run along.
1161
01:13:41,918 --> 01:13:43,127
Haylife and Forling.
1162
01:13:43,127 --> 01:13:45,254
Though I must say
you do drag out your lunch,
1163
01:13:45,254 --> 01:13:46,339
some of which, by the way,
1164
01:13:46,339 --> 01:13:48,132
still appears to be in your mouth,
from the sound of you.
1165
01:13:49,800 --> 01:13:53,596
This is Joseph Keystone,
friend to Reg Nuttall,
1166
01:13:53,596 --> 01:13:56,015
if you take my meaning.
Could I speak to him, please?
1167
01:14:01,312 --> 01:14:05,691
You see how life repeats itself
with diminishing climaxes.
1168
01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:08,152
Well, is he still out?
1169
01:14:08,152 --> 01:14:12,281
Have you some more moralizing to do
or are you simply welching on a promise?
1170
01:14:13,199 --> 01:14:15,117
All right. If you like, I'll cancel Reg.
1171
01:14:15,493 --> 01:14:17,119
We can go to Bianchi's just the two of us.
1172
01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:21,040
Cancel him? Cancel Reg?
1173
01:14:21,666 --> 01:14:24,210
But this is a human bean
you're talking about here, kid,
1174
01:14:24,210 --> 01:14:26,963
not a check or an order of groceries,
but a human bean.
1175
01:14:27,421 --> 01:14:29,548
And frankly, dear,
he's more of an attraction
1176
01:14:29,548 --> 01:14:32,009
than your shy self, just at the moment.
1177
01:14:32,009 --> 01:14:35,221
Our games together
have been going a trifle stale lately.
1178
01:14:35,221 --> 01:14:38,349
Perhaps Reg and I can find some new ones.
1179
01:14:38,808 --> 01:14:40,309
Reg won't be very playful.
1180
01:14:40,935 --> 01:14:43,646
Don't you worry. I'll get my fun.
1181
01:14:44,814 --> 01:14:48,025
Besides, in this bag here,
1182
01:14:49,360 --> 01:14:50,528
kidneys!
1183
01:14:50,528 --> 01:14:52,405
Yes, kid, kidneys!
1184
01:14:53,114 --> 01:14:54,490
I'm sorry, Ben. Not tonight.
1185
01:14:55,616 --> 01:14:56,826
Mmm-hmm.
1186
01:14:58,703 --> 01:15:00,287
So you're not inviting me.
1187
01:15:02,081 --> 01:15:03,040
I'm not going.
1188
01:15:04,417 --> 01:15:06,711
We can either eat at the flat
or at Bianchi's. It's up to you.
1189
01:15:07,795 --> 01:15:09,630
Well, if you're really not coming,
1190
01:15:09,630 --> 01:15:12,133
then there'll be all the more kidneys
for Reginald and myself.
1191
01:15:12,758 --> 01:15:14,719
What do you think he'll say to that
for an offer, eh?
1192
01:15:15,886 --> 01:15:16,887
Don't you care?
1193
01:15:19,181 --> 01:15:20,182
No, not anymore.
1194
01:15:21,308 --> 01:15:24,353
Oh, you're not breaking off with him,
are you, you competitive child, you?
1195
01:15:24,353 --> 01:15:25,896
Is that what you're trying to tell me?
1196
01:15:27,440 --> 01:15:28,399
No.
1197
01:15:29,483 --> 01:15:31,193
I'm trying to tell you
that it'll be much better
1198
01:15:31,193 --> 01:15:32,987
if you leave that side of my life alone.
1199
01:15:34,321 --> 01:15:36,615
I can't stop you from phoning him up, Ben.
You can do it any time.
1200
01:15:36,615 --> 01:15:37,867
I'm just advising you.
1201
01:15:37,867 --> 01:15:40,453
Because I don't think you'll get
very much fun out of him. I really don't.
1202
01:15:42,663 --> 01:15:45,207
I know you've had a bad day already,
what with Tom and Anne.
1203
01:15:45,750 --> 01:15:47,209
But you're making it worse.
1204
01:16:02,141 --> 01:16:05,352
You're passing up the chance
for a Lawrentian-style wrestle.
1205
01:16:07,396 --> 01:16:08,522
Can't I interest you?
1206
01:16:09,607 --> 01:16:11,067
Just remember that I warned you.
1207
01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:15,154
Two warnings in one day.
1208
01:16:19,867 --> 01:16:20,868
What is it, Joey?
1209
01:16:25,748 --> 01:16:27,083
You better tell me about it.
1210
01:16:27,625 --> 01:16:28,584
What?
1211
01:16:29,502 --> 01:16:31,420
Whatever it is
that you are warning me about.
1212
01:16:32,880 --> 01:16:34,965
-No, it's nothing.
-Oh, come on, Joey.
1213
01:16:34,965 --> 01:16:36,842
It doesn't matter. Let it go.
1214
01:16:37,843 --> 01:16:39,053
Are you free now, please?
1215
01:16:41,764 --> 01:16:43,724
Now, would you kindly tell me
1216
01:16:43,724 --> 01:16:46,894
what transpired between yourself
and this Gardner?
1217
01:16:47,311 --> 01:16:48,979
I don't know anything about it, Edna.
1218
01:16:50,481 --> 01:16:53,109
My teaching, it appears,
isn't up to his standard.
1219
01:16:53,692 --> 01:16:54,902
Indeed!
1220
01:16:56,946 --> 01:16:59,824
Well, I can assure you, Edna,
that it is more than up to mine.
1221
01:17:00,783 --> 01:17:03,702
I know our society
has become insolently egalitarian,
1222
01:17:03,702 --> 01:17:07,623
but I refuse to believe that
the gardener's verdict on your teaching
1223
01:17:07,623 --> 01:17:08,999
will be given that much weight.
1224
01:17:08,999 --> 01:17:11,168
I didn't even know we had a garden,
let alone--
1225
01:17:11,168 --> 01:17:13,170
This is the first time
in 20 years' teaching
1226
01:17:13,170 --> 01:17:14,255
I've been complained about.
1227
01:17:14,255 --> 01:17:16,882
Oh, it's preposterous.
You're a very good teacher, Edna.
1228
01:17:16,882 --> 01:17:20,928
All right. Now, let's get this sorted out.
To whom did he complain?
1229
01:17:20,928 --> 01:17:21,887
To James.
1230
01:17:22,221 --> 01:17:24,056
And what did James say?
1231
01:17:24,056 --> 01:17:27,059
He said you promised Gardner
he could have tutorials with you.
1232
01:17:27,852 --> 01:17:30,187
This conversation
apparently took place in a pub.
1233
01:17:31,856 --> 01:17:32,857
What?
1234
01:17:33,816 --> 01:17:34,817
I've had no...
1235
01:17:37,361 --> 01:17:40,281
Well, now, there was a student,
come to think of it,
1236
01:17:40,281 --> 01:17:41,949
but, my God, I'd completely forgotten.
1237
01:17:41,949 --> 01:17:45,661
I suppose it might have been Gardner.
I scarcely took him in.
1238
01:17:45,661 --> 01:17:47,663
He wasn't wearing feathers in his hat.
1239
01:17:47,663 --> 01:17:50,124
Now, previously,
you spoke of a plumed youth, wasn't it?
1240
01:17:50,624 --> 01:17:53,460
And you said nothing to him
about coming to you for Eliot?
1241
01:17:53,460 --> 01:17:57,214
I have an idea he told me
he had become keen on Eliot. That's all.
1242
01:17:58,007 --> 01:17:59,341
"Keen on Eliot"?
1243
01:17:59,341 --> 01:18:03,679
Something of the sort. I suppose I thought
he was after a few tutorials,
1244
01:18:03,679 --> 01:18:06,056
but really, I haven't given him a thought.
1245
01:18:06,056 --> 01:18:07,933
And did you discuss
whether these tutorials
1246
01:18:07,933 --> 01:18:09,685
are to replace his seminars with me?
1247
01:18:10,728 --> 01:18:12,396
Certainly not!
1248
01:18:12,813 --> 01:18:15,649
And did you tell him to go to James
and explain the circumstances
1249
01:18:15,649 --> 01:18:17,902
that he wasn't getting anything
out of my seminars?
1250
01:18:18,819 --> 01:18:20,279
Is that what James said?
1251
01:18:20,279 --> 01:18:22,573
He tried so hard not to tell me
what Gardner had said,
1252
01:18:22,573 --> 01:18:23,782
it was perfectly obvious.
1253
01:18:24,658 --> 01:18:26,327
He had his diplomatic smile on,
1254
01:18:27,286 --> 01:18:29,079
the one that makes him look
exactly like a rabbit.
1255
01:18:30,414 --> 01:18:33,167
But I suppose I should be grateful
that he didn't encourage that lout
1256
01:18:33,167 --> 01:18:35,669
to throw my furniture out of the window
or burn my notes.
1257
01:18:36,670 --> 01:18:38,964
I work very hard for those seminars.
1258
01:18:38,964 --> 01:18:40,299
We know you do, Edna.
1259
01:18:40,299 --> 01:18:43,302
I don't expect gratitude, far from it.
1260
01:18:44,428 --> 01:18:46,847
But I do expect a minimum
of civilized behaviour.
1261
01:18:47,223 --> 01:18:49,558
And I expect to be backed up
by the Head of the Department
1262
01:18:49,725 --> 01:18:51,310
and the other members of the staff
1263
01:18:51,310 --> 01:18:54,271
when I'm unlucky enough to have
a bolshy troublemaker in my group.
1264
01:18:54,271 --> 01:18:56,065
But of course we'll back you up.
1265
01:18:56,774 --> 01:19:00,402
How dare he. How dare he complain.
1266
01:19:02,571 --> 01:19:05,574
Look, perhaps the best thing
is to let me take him on.
1267
01:19:06,742 --> 01:19:09,203
There's not the slightest question
of that, Ben. Not the slightest.
1268
01:19:09,203 --> 01:19:11,622
He stays in my seminars.
That's all there is to it.
1269
01:19:12,790 --> 01:19:15,459
Of course. If that's the way you want it.
1270
01:19:16,752 --> 01:19:19,129
The only trouble is,
you may not see much of him.
1271
01:19:20,506 --> 01:19:22,216
So you two are on his side then?
1272
01:19:23,425 --> 01:19:25,594
Certainly not.
I think Edna's got every right--
1273
01:19:25,594 --> 01:19:26,845
-Edna.
-Leave me alone.
1274
01:19:26,845 --> 01:19:30,516
I'm sorry, Edna. It was my fault
for not taking young Gardner seriously.
1275
01:19:31,058 --> 01:19:32,893
Nobody takes anything seriously anymore.
1276
01:19:33,602 --> 01:19:36,855
But universities were serious once.
Yes, they were.
1277
01:19:37,439 --> 01:19:40,276
But now they despise them,
just as they despise me.
1278
01:19:40,276 --> 01:19:41,735
Just as you two despise me.
1279
01:19:41,735 --> 01:19:42,861
Despise you?
1280
01:19:42,861 --> 01:19:45,739
I just didn't want you to be hurt
or to worry too much.
1281
01:19:45,739 --> 01:19:47,866
That's precisely what I mean.
1282
01:19:49,535 --> 01:19:50,494
Sorry.
1283
01:19:51,036 --> 01:19:53,163
Butley, English. Oh.
1284
01:19:53,163 --> 01:19:55,207
No, actually, this is not a good time.
1285
01:19:55,624 --> 01:19:57,042
I'm in the middle of something.
1286
01:19:57,042 --> 01:19:59,670
If that's James,
please tell him I'm going home.
1287
01:20:00,754 --> 01:20:03,007
As education has become optional
in this college,
1288
01:20:03,424 --> 01:20:06,343
I've chosen to cancel my classes
for the rest of the day.
1289
01:20:11,056 --> 01:20:12,891
Sorry, James. Could we talk later?
1290
01:20:19,398 --> 01:20:20,357
Bloody woman!
1291
01:20:29,408 --> 01:20:30,993
So you did agree to take Gardner in, then?
1292
01:20:33,245 --> 01:20:34,788
One of us took the other in, all right.
1293
01:20:35,914 --> 01:20:38,000
I shall find out later
which way around it was.
1294
01:20:38,542 --> 01:20:39,877
You'll enjoy that, I'm sure.
1295
01:20:41,962 --> 01:20:43,714
I deserve it, after all' this.
1296
01:20:45,049 --> 01:20:46,342
And what about Edna?
1297
01:20:46,342 --> 01:20:48,093
Oh, bloody woman.
1298
01:20:49,553 --> 01:20:50,763
That's all about Edna.
1299
01:20:52,014 --> 01:20:53,307
She's lucky to be rid of him.
1300
01:20:53,307 --> 01:20:55,559
It's not my fault
if she's too vain to admit it.
1301
01:20:56,685 --> 01:20:58,604
And all you had to do just now
was to keep quiet
1302
01:20:58,604 --> 01:21:00,397
and then tell Gardner
it couldn't be managed.
1303
01:21:04,485 --> 01:21:05,819
But I am managing it.
1304
01:21:06,612 --> 01:21:08,030
Oh, Christ!
1305
01:21:09,031 --> 01:21:10,699
But what for? What the hell for?
1306
01:21:11,533 --> 01:21:14,411
Perhaps I had a sense of vacancies
opening up in my life.
1307
01:21:16,413 --> 01:21:18,207
I needed to fill them, perhaps.
1308
01:21:18,832 --> 01:21:20,834
Then why don't you do it
from your legitimate students,
1309
01:21:20,834 --> 01:21:23,295
instead of fobbing them off
and refusing to teach them?
1310
01:21:23,754 --> 01:21:26,632
I haven't got any legitimate students.
They're all bastards.
1311
01:21:27,466 --> 01:21:29,968
Which is my term of endearment for bores.
1312
01:21:32,429 --> 01:21:36,183
Gardner's interesting.
He actually interests me.
1313
01:21:37,643 --> 01:21:40,396
At least, I think he does.
I can't remember him clearly...
1314
01:21:42,481 --> 01:21:44,316
and I shall have to see the hat,
of course.
1315
01:21:46,860 --> 01:21:50,072
You interested me once, dear,
and look where it's got you.
1316
01:21:50,614 --> 01:21:52,658
An assistant lectureship.
1317
01:21:53,158 --> 01:21:55,411
Of course,
I don't know whether my interest
1318
01:21:55,411 --> 01:21:57,037
can carry you through your board.
1319
01:21:57,663 --> 01:21:59,706
You mean he'll have a relationship
with you, don't you?
1320
01:22:00,499 --> 01:22:02,918
While all poor Edna can offer him
is a relationship with Byron
1321
01:22:02,918 --> 01:22:04,503
in a properly conducted seminar.
1322
01:22:11,093 --> 01:22:14,138
Well, Joseph,
what chance your lectureship now?
1323
01:22:14,596 --> 01:22:17,850
Edna says you despise her.
And she's quite right.
1324
01:22:19,351 --> 01:22:22,604
Toadying is the sincerest form
of contempt.
1325
01:22:26,608 --> 01:22:28,902
I remember when you stood in this room,
1326
01:22:29,903 --> 01:22:32,906
darkly dressed
to colour up your melancholy,
1327
01:22:34,783 --> 01:22:37,995
and I had you read a little Eliot to me.
Do you remember that?
1328
01:22:39,830 --> 01:22:44,126
Little did we know that a long time away,
far into the future,
1329
01:22:44,918 --> 01:22:48,755
we would be worrying and fretting together
about your promotion.
1330
01:22:52,384 --> 01:22:54,845
Our beginnings never know our ends.
1331
01:22:56,430 --> 01:22:59,141
They're always so sad, so sad.
1332
01:23:02,936 --> 01:23:06,190
Don't flounce, Dapply.
It doesn't suit your mousy hindquarters.
1333
01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:09,902
It's not my fault
you buggered everything up with Anne.
1334
01:23:10,068 --> 01:23:11,862
You don't have to
bugger everything up for me, too.
1335
01:23:12,446 --> 01:23:16,783
No, I don't.
I'm doing it as a favour and for fun.
1336
01:23:18,118 --> 01:23:19,536
I'm sick to death of your fun.
1337
01:23:20,829 --> 01:23:22,873
Bum-twitch, bum-twitch!
1338
01:23:24,333 --> 01:23:25,292
Bum-twitch.
1339
01:23:28,212 --> 01:23:29,338
Teacher's pet!
1340
01:23:35,886 --> 01:23:37,095
Oh!
1341
01:24:14,049 --> 01:24:15,050
Ah.
1342
01:24:46,540 --> 01:24:48,834
"Appley Dapply, a little brown mouse,
1343
01:24:49,918 --> 01:24:52,296
Goes to the cupboard in somebody's house.
1344
01:24:53,297 --> 01:24:56,008
In somebody's cupboard
there's everything nice,
1345
01:24:58,468 --> 01:25:02,306
Pot, Scotch, French letters
1346
01:25:04,182 --> 01:25:06,893
For middle-aged mice."
1347
01:25:19,906 --> 01:25:21,658
Hello? Hello?
1348
01:25:23,118 --> 01:25:24,703
Woolly Bear, English.
1349
01:25:28,999 --> 01:25:30,667
Who would like to see Mr. Keystone?
1350
01:25:33,462 --> 01:25:34,463
What?
1351
01:25:38,091 --> 01:25:39,343
Indeed?
1352
01:25:41,511 --> 01:25:43,847
Yes, he is here. Just one moment.
1353
01:25:54,858 --> 01:25:58,320
Mr. Keystone says would you kindly
send him along to the office? Thank you.
1354
01:26:35,190 --> 01:26:36,274
Come.
1355
01:26:38,610 --> 01:26:39,569
Minute, please.
1356
01:26:40,612 --> 01:26:41,571
Isn't Joey here?
1357
01:26:43,281 --> 01:26:44,241
Good God.
1358
01:26:44,658 --> 01:26:46,201
It's Reg, isn't it?
1359
01:26:46,743 --> 01:26:51,039
Of course it is.
I'm terribly sorry. Do come in.
1360
01:26:51,039 --> 01:26:52,374
But your porter said he was here.
1361
01:26:52,374 --> 01:26:56,086
Yes, yes. So he will be.
He's just popped out, actually,
1362
01:26:56,086 --> 01:26:58,797
to have a brief word
with a colleague in distress.
1363
01:27:00,507 --> 01:27:01,550
How are you?
1364
01:27:02,008 --> 01:27:03,135
Very well, thanks. And you?
1365
01:27:04,428 --> 01:27:05,470
As you see me.
1366
01:27:07,264 --> 01:27:08,223
Yes.
1367
01:27:08,640 --> 01:27:09,850
Look, you're obviously very busy.
1368
01:27:10,016 --> 01:27:11,935
If you just tell Joey
I'm at the porter's desk--
1369
01:27:11,935 --> 01:27:12,894
Don't be silly.
1370
01:27:13,061 --> 01:27:15,897
You sit yourself down over there,
and I'll just finish this off.
1371
01:27:16,398 --> 01:27:17,482
I won't be a moment.
1372
01:27:18,358 --> 01:27:19,359
Please.
1373
01:27:21,903 --> 01:27:23,739
What brings you down here, anyway?
1374
01:27:24,197 --> 01:27:25,157
I just thought I'd look in.
1375
01:27:27,576 --> 01:27:30,954
I have to make my handwriting illegible
so they don't find out about my spelling.
1376
01:27:33,749 --> 01:27:35,041
To check up, eh?
1377
01:27:36,835 --> 01:27:37,878
Check up?
1378
01:27:39,045 --> 01:27:42,966
Joey's always saying that
if you got your hands on our little room,
1379
01:27:42,966 --> 01:27:44,259
which is an everywhere,
1380
01:27:45,677 --> 01:27:46,762
or rather on me,
1381
01:27:46,762 --> 01:27:49,097
as I'm the one responsible
for the mess we're in.
1382
01:27:49,806 --> 01:27:53,226
Oh, but you should see our flat.
Even Joey's room is like a pigsty.
1383
01:27:53,226 --> 01:27:56,480
Naturally, I'm the pig
that made it that way.
1384
01:27:56,480 --> 01:27:59,941
Oh, you really must come down sometime
and help us out.
1385
01:27:59,941 --> 01:28:02,694
He says you've done wonders
with your little kitchen.
1386
01:28:04,196 --> 01:28:05,322
I'm in publishing.
1387
01:28:07,783 --> 01:28:08,742
Yes?
1388
01:28:09,242 --> 01:28:11,369
Not in interior decorating.
1389
01:28:12,329 --> 01:28:14,498
God, I'm so sorry. No, no.
1390
01:28:15,081 --> 01:28:19,377
I don't get your job wrong anymore.
It would be inexcusable.
1391
01:28:20,170 --> 01:28:22,631
I'm always making Joey tell me about it,
in fact.
1392
01:28:23,089 --> 01:28:26,259
Oh, I know. He's always telling me
about having to tell you about it.
1393
01:28:28,637 --> 01:28:31,765
He says you're a marvelous cook.
1394
01:28:33,433 --> 01:28:34,643
I'm glad he eats well.
1395
01:28:34,643 --> 01:28:38,313
Yes. Keeps his figure, too.
Lucky sod.
1396
01:28:40,607 --> 01:28:45,403
Reg, you know, I'm awfully glad to have
a chance to talk to you privately.
1397
01:28:45,403 --> 01:28:50,325
I behaved abominably the last time we met,
and I just hope,
1398
01:28:51,326 --> 01:28:55,580
well, that you have forgiven me
for your shoes.
1399
01:28:56,373 --> 01:28:57,833
I never apologized properly.
1400
01:28:58,208 --> 01:28:59,543
It's all right. These things happen.
1401
01:29:00,752 --> 01:29:03,713
But your shoes survived, did they?
1402
01:29:05,006 --> 01:29:05,966
They were suede.
1403
01:29:07,717 --> 01:29:09,261
Oh, dear.
1404
01:29:10,637 --> 01:29:11,972
Suede.
1405
01:29:14,349 --> 01:29:16,351
Look, you must want to get on.
I'll go back to the porter.
1406
01:29:16,351 --> 01:29:18,270
-No, you mustn't do that.
-I don't mind.
1407
01:29:18,812 --> 01:29:20,772
In point of fact,
we were doing a little business together.
1408
01:29:21,439 --> 01:29:22,899
He's an Arsenal supporter.
1409
01:29:22,899 --> 01:29:25,819
Good God. Is he really? In point of fact?
1410
01:29:27,237 --> 01:29:28,905
-So I can let you get on with--
-Have a drink.
1411
01:29:29,531 --> 01:29:30,490
I don't think I ought to.
1412
01:29:31,658 --> 01:29:33,910
Oh, you're lucky.
1413
01:29:34,619 --> 01:29:35,996
Then you'll really enjoy it.
1414
01:29:43,545 --> 01:29:45,630
I understand you've met my friend Tom.
1415
01:29:46,673 --> 01:29:48,091
Tom Weatherley, by the way.
1416
01:29:48,466 --> 01:29:49,467
I know Tom, yes.
1417
01:29:50,886 --> 01:29:53,054
You know all' my domestic news, too,
I gather.
1418
01:29:53,054 --> 01:29:55,098
I only just heard about it myself today.
1419
01:29:55,599 --> 01:29:56,975
Yes, I've heard something about it.
1420
01:29:57,767 --> 01:30:00,020
-I'm sorry.
-Do you detest warm Scotch?
1421
01:30:00,020 --> 01:30:02,188
I don't know how you drink it
in your part of the world.
1422
01:30:02,856 --> 01:30:03,815
This is fine.
1423
01:30:04,274 --> 01:30:06,401
Oh, good. Cheers.
1424
01:30:07,068 --> 01:30:08,028
Cheers.
1425
01:30:08,945 --> 01:30:09,905
Thanks.
1426
01:30:30,508 --> 01:30:32,093
It's nice to have some company.
1427
01:30:33,845 --> 01:30:37,807
These last few hours I've felt quite like
Antony at his close.
1428
01:30:39,184 --> 01:30:42,437
The air is full
of the gods' departing musics.
1429
01:30:43,647 --> 01:30:46,608
So do forgive a tendency to babble.
1430
01:30:47,609 --> 01:30:48,985
No, that's all' right. I understand.
1431
01:30:49,569 --> 01:30:50,528
Cheers.
1432
01:30:51,529 --> 01:30:55,909
Actually, what this whole business
has brought home to me
1433
01:30:57,535 --> 01:31:00,330
is how dependent I am on my past.
1434
01:31:01,998 --> 01:31:04,751
But it was quite a short marriage,
wasn't it?
1435
01:31:07,045 --> 01:31:08,672
No, I was talking about Joey.
1436
01:31:11,049 --> 01:31:12,008
Oh.
1437
01:31:12,384 --> 01:31:15,261
It's as if my marriage
were an intermission, if you see.
1438
01:31:15,261 --> 01:31:17,681
Now I'm catching up with my past again,
1439
01:31:17,681 --> 01:31:20,892
which is where I suppose
my future is also.
1440
01:31:22,143 --> 01:31:25,021
- Really?
- Sorry. I'm being literary.
1441
01:31:25,021 --> 01:31:27,524
But I've always thought of you
as a born romantic.
1442
01:31:28,191 --> 01:31:29,985
From Joey's description of your past.
1443
01:31:31,486 --> 01:31:32,904
A touch of the butterfly, eh?
1444
01:31:33,780 --> 01:31:34,906
Really?
1445
01:31:35,365 --> 01:31:37,033
And what does Joey say
to make you think that?
1446
01:31:39,577 --> 01:31:42,831
Oh, I don't know. The way you've pulled up
your roots in the north,
1447
01:31:43,373 --> 01:31:46,501
what I imagine to be
your emotional pattern,
1448
01:31:47,127 --> 01:31:50,672
your love of the... bizarre.
1449
01:31:52,048 --> 01:31:53,591
And how does that express itself?
1450
01:31:54,467 --> 01:31:56,845
Joey's always recounting your experiences.
1451
01:31:57,679 --> 01:32:01,141
For example, with the Gurkhas.
You were with them, weren't you?
1452
01:32:01,141 --> 01:32:02,600
I was stationed with them, yes.
1453
01:32:02,600 --> 01:32:04,686
About ten years ago,
during my National Service.
1454
01:32:04,686 --> 01:32:08,231
Exactly.
And I never knew what a Gurkha was.
1455
01:32:08,231 --> 01:32:11,568
I still tend to think he's something
you get with a cocktail.
1456
01:32:12,277 --> 01:32:14,821
-Do you?
-They must be tough little towsers.
1457
01:32:15,905 --> 01:32:16,906
They are.
1458
01:32:18,825 --> 01:32:20,994
You didn't do your National Service,
I take it.
1459
01:32:21,911 --> 01:32:24,914
Oh, Christ! Sorry, I mean, no.
1460
01:32:25,707 --> 01:32:26,666
How come?
1461
01:32:29,878 --> 01:32:31,171
I got took queer.
1462
01:32:37,010 --> 01:32:38,386
Oh, you're ready for another one.
1463
01:32:38,386 --> 01:32:39,846
No, in point of fact, I'd rather not.
1464
01:32:39,846 --> 01:32:41,765
This is an altogether different suburb.
1465
01:32:42,390 --> 01:32:43,683
Sorry, what suburb?
1466
01:32:43,683 --> 01:32:48,229
Oh, it's just a little joke of Joey's.
Impossible to understand out of context.
1467
01:32:49,939 --> 01:32:51,274
But how is the world of fiction?
1468
01:32:52,484 --> 01:32:53,693
Can't complain.
1469
01:32:53,693 --> 01:32:55,403
What have you got coming out
at the moment?
1470
01:32:57,280 --> 01:32:59,699
At the moment I'm doing two cookery books,
1471
01:33:00,492 --> 01:33:03,161
an authoritative guide to bird-watching
in Lincolnshire,
1472
01:33:03,870 --> 01:33:06,539
the only intelligent account of the farce
of El Alamein--
1473
01:33:07,499 --> 01:33:09,125
by an NCO, needless to say--
1474
01:33:09,959 --> 01:33:11,419
and a New Testament commentary.
1475
01:33:13,505 --> 01:33:14,589
That's your fiction list?
1476
01:33:16,132 --> 01:33:17,467
No, that's our list for next month.
1477
01:33:18,676 --> 01:33:19,844
No novels at all, then?
1478
01:33:20,595 --> 01:33:22,889
We",
just one of those historical romances
1479
01:33:22,889 --> 01:33:25,475
where the hero shoves his sword
into assorted villains
1480
01:33:25,475 --> 01:33:27,393
and his cock into assorted ladies.
1481
01:33:27,769 --> 01:33:30,396
It won't get the reviews,
but it'll make us money.
1482
01:33:34,275 --> 01:33:36,528
If he did it the other way around,
you might get both.
1483
01:33:38,905 --> 01:33:41,825
But the point is, you see,
by putting that one through,
1484
01:33:41,825 --> 01:33:44,244
we can afford to do
something worthwhile later.
1485
01:33:45,328 --> 01:33:48,331
For instance, I've just made a decision
about a novel on National Service life.
1486
01:33:49,624 --> 01:33:51,709
Oh, one of those?
1487
01:33:52,544 --> 01:33:54,546
I thought that vogue was eight years dead.
1488
01:33:55,046 --> 01:33:56,881
Oh, no, not one of those.
1489
01:33:58,049 --> 01:33:59,759
This is something special, in my opinion.
1490
01:34:00,760 --> 01:34:04,264
Of course, it mightn't interest you
as you didn't do your National Service,
1491
01:34:05,014 --> 01:34:10,770
but personally, I found it moving, witty,
gracefully organized, genuinely poetic.
1492
01:34:12,772 --> 01:34:14,190
The National Service?
1493
01:34:15,859 --> 01:34:16,818
Good God.
1494
01:34:18,194 --> 01:34:20,905
Those qualities are hard enough
to come by in art.
1495
01:34:21,156 --> 01:34:24,200
It never occurred to me
to look for them in life,
1496
01:34:25,368 --> 01:34:27,245
especially as run by the armed forces.
1497
01:34:28,997 --> 01:34:30,081
Cheers.
1498
01:34:30,832 --> 01:34:33,209
Nevertheless,
I expect you will be curious in this case.
1499
01:34:33,918 --> 01:34:36,004
Theoretically,
I can't tell you our author's name
1500
01:34:36,004 --> 01:34:37,338
as the board doesn't meet till tomorrow,
1501
01:34:38,673 --> 01:34:41,384
but if I just mention that
he's a comprehensive school teacher...
1502
01:34:43,219 --> 01:34:44,220
Cheers.
1503
01:34:50,310 --> 01:34:51,769
Well, well, well.
1504
01:34:52,312 --> 01:34:55,899
The most boring man in London
strikes again.
1505
01:34:56,232 --> 01:34:57,233
I'm sorry.
1506
01:35:00,570 --> 01:35:01,529
Why?
1507
01:35:02,155 --> 01:35:03,531
It must be painful for you.
1508
01:35:04,908 --> 01:35:05,867
Why?
1509
01:35:06,409 --> 01:35:07,994
Because of his relationship with you.
1510
01:35:08,745 --> 01:35:10,705
It was wrong of me to have mentioned it.
1511
01:35:10,705 --> 01:35:11,706
On the contrary.
1512
01:35:13,875 --> 01:35:15,168
It was the correct move.
1513
01:35:21,674 --> 01:35:22,926
Has Joey read it?
1514
01:35:23,384 --> 01:35:25,678
Not yet.
It was offered to me in strict secrecy,
1515
01:35:25,678 --> 01:35:27,222
at least until I'd made up my mind.
1516
01:35:27,889 --> 01:35:29,140
But I can tell him about it now.
1517
01:35:30,350 --> 01:35:31,351
I think he'll like it.
1518
01:35:31,809 --> 01:35:34,020
That's because you don't know him
very well, perhaps.
1519
01:35:35,355 --> 01:35:38,566
He may be something of a dilettante
in personal relationships,
1520
01:35:38,566 --> 01:35:41,694
but he holds fast to standards
on important matters.
1521
01:35:43,154 --> 01:35:44,447
We once drew up a list
1522
01:35:44,447 --> 01:35:48,284
of the five most tedious literary subjects
in the world.
1523
01:35:48,952 --> 01:35:50,954
National Service came fifth,
1524
01:35:52,288 --> 01:35:54,415
just behind the Latin poems of Milton.
1525
01:35:54,874 --> 01:35:58,002
Really?
And what occupied the other three places?
1526
01:35:58,628 --> 01:36:00,088
The English poems of Milton.
1527
01:36:02,257 --> 01:36:05,093
When I was at York,
I chose Milton for my special subject.
1528
01:36:06,594 --> 01:36:08,930
That sounds an excellent arrangement.
1529
01:36:10,598 --> 01:36:12,850
The thing is to confine him to the north.
1530
01:36:14,477 --> 01:36:18,398
Down here we can dally
with Suckling and Lovelace.
1531
01:36:18,815 --> 01:36:19,857
And Beatrix Potter?
1532
01:36:20,858 --> 01:36:24,570
Joey says you've got great admiration
for the middle-class nursery poets.
1533
01:36:25,029 --> 01:36:26,322
With reservations.
1534
01:36:27,198 --> 01:36:31,369
I find some of the novellae
a trifle... heavy-going.
1535
01:36:35,748 --> 01:36:38,626
I call Joey Appley Dapply, did you know?
1536
01:36:39,460 --> 01:36:41,254
- Do you?
- Yes.
1537
01:36:41,546 --> 01:36:43,506
And he calls me Old Mr. Pricklepin.
1538
01:36:44,215 --> 01:36:47,385
After Old Mr. Pricklepin,
with never a coat to put his pins in.
1539
01:36:48,386 --> 01:36:51,014
And sometimes I call him
Diggory Diggory Delvet,
1540
01:36:51,014 --> 01:36:53,057
when he's burrowing away at his book.
1541
01:36:55,518 --> 01:36:57,353
What did you mean by being took queer?
1542
01:36:59,355 --> 01:37:00,982
Oh, you know, I'm sure.
1543
01:37:03,026 --> 01:37:04,402
You do look shocked, Reg.
1544
01:37:04,902 --> 01:37:05,903
That's surprising,
1545
01:37:07,613 --> 01:37:09,198
because I'm not surprised, even.
1546
01:37:10,950 --> 01:37:12,994
You don't think
there's anything shameful in it, then?
1547
01:37:13,703 --> 01:37:14,662
In what?
1548
01:37:16,497 --> 01:37:17,540
Dodging the draft.
1549
01:37:18,374 --> 01:37:20,793
There are thousands of blokes
from working-class homes who couldn't.
1550
01:37:21,544 --> 01:37:22,712
They didn't know the tricks.
1551
01:37:23,671 --> 01:37:25,506
Besides, they'd rather have done
ten years in uniform
1552
01:37:25,506 --> 01:37:26,841
than get out of it that way.
1553
01:37:28,343 --> 01:37:30,845
Then you think there's something shameful
in being taken queer?
1554
01:37:30,845 --> 01:37:33,723
I'm talking about people
pretending to be what they're not.
1555
01:37:34,474 --> 01:37:36,142
-Not what?
-Not what they are.
1556
01:37:38,561 --> 01:37:40,563
But if people do get taken queer,
1557
01:37:40,938 --> 01:37:44,400
it's nature we must blame,
or their bodies, mustn't we?
1558
01:37:45,193 --> 01:37:47,570
Medicine's still got a long way to go,
Reg.
1559
01:37:48,696 --> 01:37:49,822
Why do you use that word?
1560
01:37:50,323 --> 01:37:52,325
-What word?
-“Queer."
1561
01:37:53,659 --> 01:37:54,744
Does it offend you?
1562
01:37:56,037 --> 01:37:57,080
It's beginning to.
1563
01:37:57,663 --> 01:37:58,873
Oh, I'm sorry.
1564
01:37:59,749 --> 01:38:01,209
It's an old nursery habit.
1565
01:38:02,001 --> 01:38:03,628
One of our chars used to say it.
1566
01:38:03,628 --> 01:38:07,131
Whenever I came down with anything,
it would be,
1567
01:38:07,673 --> 01:38:10,885
"Our Ben's took queer again,
poor little mite."
1568
01:38:15,932 --> 01:38:19,685
Although I must admit it is
a trifle inappropriate for a touch of TB.
1569
01:38:19,685 --> 01:38:20,937
TB?
1570
01:38:20,937 --> 01:38:24,857
Oh, they found it just in time.
At my board medical, in fact.
1571
01:38:28,152 --> 01:38:30,279
Why do you object to the phrase, though?
1572
01:38:30,655 --> 01:38:31,989
No, no, it doesn't matter.
1573
01:38:33,491 --> 01:38:35,118
A misunderstanding. I'm sorry.
1574
01:38:36,702 --> 01:38:37,703
Oh.
1575
01:38:40,957 --> 01:38:42,250
Oh, I see.
1576
01:38:44,085 --> 01:38:45,044
Queer.
1577
01:38:46,212 --> 01:38:48,506
Oh, good God.
1578
01:38:50,591 --> 01:38:53,344
You didn't think I'd sink quite so low,
did you?
1579
01:38:54,929 --> 01:38:56,013
I'm sorry.
1580
01:38:56,013 --> 01:38:57,557
It's all right.
1581
01:38:59,225 --> 01:39:00,685
-Cheers.
-Cheers.
1582
01:39:02,687 --> 01:39:03,896
Homosexual.
1583
01:39:04,397 --> 01:39:05,648
-What?
-Homosexual.
1584
01:39:06,315 --> 01:39:09,110
You see, I was wondering perhaps
one should say that instead of "queer,"
1585
01:39:09,110 --> 01:39:10,820
in your sense of the word, I mean.
1586
01:39:12,488 --> 01:39:13,448
Homosexual.
1587
01:39:13,948 --> 01:39:15,450
It doesn't really matter at all.
1588
01:39:16,367 --> 01:39:17,577
I don't really care.
1589
01:39:21,372 --> 01:39:26,627
Do you feel the same about "fairies"
as you do about "queers"?
1590
01:39:27,044 --> 01:39:28,296
Yes, in point of fact.
1591
01:39:29,213 --> 01:39:30,173
Since you ask.
1592
01:39:30,631 --> 01:39:32,800
Right, I've got that.
1593
01:39:36,387 --> 01:39:39,307
Of course, they've almost vanished anyway,
1594
01:39:39,765 --> 01:39:43,269
the old-style queens and queers,
the poofs, the fairies.
1595
01:39:44,437 --> 01:39:47,857
Oh, the very words seem to conjure up
a magical world
1596
01:39:47,857 --> 01:39:50,651
of naughty thrills and forbidden fruits.
1597
01:39:51,694 --> 01:39:52,820
Sorry.
1598
01:39:53,362 --> 01:39:55,531
See,
I used to enjoy them enjoying themselves.
1599
01:39:55,531 --> 01:40:00,203
Their varied performances
contributed to my life's varieties.
1600
01:40:00,661 --> 01:40:04,874
But now the law, in making them safe,
has made them drab.
1601
01:40:06,083 --> 01:40:08,336
Just like the heterosexual rest of us.
1602
01:40:10,588 --> 01:40:11,547
Poor sods.
1603
01:40:12,798 --> 01:40:13,758
Don't you think?
1604
01:40:14,717 --> 01:40:18,221
Oh, there's enough affectation
and bitchiness among heterosexuals
1605
01:40:18,221 --> 01:40:19,222
to be getting along with.
1606
01:40:20,681 --> 01:40:21,849
Don't you think?
1607
01:40:24,310 --> 01:40:26,187
Don't worry. He'll be here in a moment.
1608
01:40:28,105 --> 01:40:30,900
How are things between you two,
then, by the way?
1609
01:40:31,776 --> 01:40:34,195
-What things?
-No complications?
1610
01:40:34,570 --> 01:40:36,822
What kind of complications would there be?
1611
01:40:38,324 --> 01:40:41,327
Well, in that our routine
does not interfere with your--
1612
01:40:42,495 --> 01:40:43,788
plural meaning--
1613
01:40:44,580 --> 01:40:45,831
routine.
1614
01:40:45,831 --> 01:40:46,958
"Plural meaning"?
1615
01:40:47,833 --> 01:40:49,001
Meaning what?
1616
01:40:49,585 --> 01:40:51,003
Yours and his.
1617
01:40:52,046 --> 01:40:54,757
Your routines... together.
1618
01:40:56,092 --> 01:40:57,843
Well, it has done, frankly, yes.
1619
01:40:59,637 --> 01:41:00,596
Now you ask.
1620
01:41:02,932 --> 01:41:04,517
But I don't think it will from now on.
1621
01:41:07,812 --> 01:41:09,480
Then you're beginning
to get the hang of it.
1622
01:41:11,065 --> 01:41:12,066
Good.
1623
01:41:13,568 --> 01:41:17,947
Because sometimes I have suspected
that our friendship,
1624
01:41:17,947 --> 01:41:19,991
going back so far and including so much,
1625
01:41:20,866 --> 01:41:23,744
so much of his history,
so much of my history,
1626
01:41:24,745 --> 01:41:27,039
which has indeed become our history--
1627
01:41:28,165 --> 01:41:29,917
singular meaning this time--
1628
01:41:30,918 --> 01:41:36,716
must make it difficult for any new people
that we pick up... on the side.
1629
01:41:38,092 --> 01:41:39,343
Like your wife, do you mean?
1630
01:41:41,012 --> 01:41:42,221
Well done.
1631
01:41:43,514 --> 01:41:45,182
Yes, like poor old Anne.
1632
01:41:45,182 --> 01:41:47,310
I suppose she must have felt
that her share
1633
01:41:47,310 --> 01:41:49,478
amounted to a minor infidelity, really.
1634
01:41:50,771 --> 01:41:52,940
I speak metaphorically, of course,
1635
01:41:52,940 --> 01:41:55,943
but then I think that marriage
is the best metaphor
1636
01:41:55,943 --> 01:41:58,195
for all our intense relationships.
1637
01:41:58,863 --> 01:42:01,824
Except those that we have
with our husbands and wives.
1638
01:42:03,200 --> 01:42:04,368
Naturally.
1639
01:42:05,953 --> 01:42:08,331
So you think of yourself
as married to Joey, do you?
1640
01:42:11,334 --> 01:42:12,501
Metaphorically.
1641
01:42:15,546 --> 01:42:16,547
Sorry.
1642
01:42:17,298 --> 01:42:20,176
Butley, English. Oh, James.
1643
01:42:20,176 --> 01:42:23,179
No, I'm sorry.
I'm afraid I still can't talk properly.
1644
01:42:23,179 --> 01:42:24,805
I'm in the middle of a tutorial.
1645
01:42:24,805 --> 01:42:27,099
...really, really must talk.
1646
01:42:27,099 --> 01:42:29,018
Okay, yes. Bye.
1647
01:42:30,603 --> 01:42:32,313
What metaphor would you use
1648
01:42:32,313 --> 01:42:35,024
when you learned that Joey
was going to move in with someone else?
1649
01:42:36,442 --> 01:42:39,278
Would that be divorce, metaphorically?
1650
01:42:47,495 --> 01:42:49,789
- What?
- I'm sorry.
1651
01:42:50,289 --> 01:42:51,415
I shouldn't do that.
1652
01:42:51,791 --> 01:42:53,209
But I was thinking it must be odd
1653
01:42:53,209 --> 01:42:55,169
getting news of two divorces
in the same day.
1654
01:43:01,258 --> 01:43:04,053
Joey... hasn't said anything.
1655
01:43:04,428 --> 01:43:06,847
No. I'm giving the news.
1656
01:43:08,099 --> 01:43:09,475
You might say that when he comes to me,
1657
01:43:10,768 --> 01:43:13,938
our Joey will be moving
out of figures of speech
1658
01:43:13,938 --> 01:43:15,356
into matters of fact.
1659
01:43:16,607 --> 01:43:19,193
Ours will be too much like a marriage
to be a metaphor.
1660
01:43:21,278 --> 01:43:23,280
I thought you didn't admit to being--
1661
01:43:24,573 --> 01:43:25,533
What?
1662
01:43:26,909 --> 01:43:27,868
Different.
1663
01:43:29,036 --> 01:43:30,996
There are moments
when frankness is necessary.
1664
01:43:32,289 --> 01:43:34,709
No, our Joey has just been waiting
for the right queen,
1665
01:43:35,626 --> 01:43:37,795
fruit, fairy, poof,
1666
01:43:39,296 --> 01:43:41,257
or homosexual to come along.
1667
01:43:42,842 --> 01:43:43,926
He's come.
1668
01:43:46,345 --> 01:43:48,806
Well, isn't he lucky?
1669
01:43:54,812 --> 01:43:56,856
-Hello.
-And cheers.
1670
01:44:00,943 --> 01:44:03,279
We've just been sorting things out,
Ben and I.
1671
01:44:03,696 --> 01:44:08,617
Yes, our Reg has just been giving me
the second instalment of the day's news.
1672
01:44:09,452 --> 01:44:12,955
But then traditionally,
since metaphorically,
1673
01:44:13,831 --> 01:44:15,666
I should be the last to hear.
1674
01:44:17,209 --> 01:44:18,669
I wanted to tell you myself.
1675
01:44:19,253 --> 01:44:20,296
Wanted to, did you?
1676
01:44:22,631 --> 01:44:24,925
And were you looking forward
to a subsequent scene?
1677
01:44:25,384 --> 01:44:26,469
No.
1678
01:44:26,469 --> 01:44:29,972
Oh, how unlike each other we are.
I would have enjoyed it.
1679
01:44:30,431 --> 01:44:32,266
-How did your lecture go?
-All right.
1680
01:44:33,184 --> 01:44:34,727
-Any more teaching today?
-No.
1681
01:44:35,853 --> 01:44:36,854
Come on then.
1682
01:44:38,856 --> 01:44:40,149
Let's move your things.
1683
01:44:40,649 --> 01:44:42,902
Move my things? No, I can't until later.
1684
01:44:43,819 --> 01:44:45,029
Why not?
1685
01:44:45,029 --> 01:44:46,739
Because there's something I've got to do.
1686
01:44:46,739 --> 01:44:48,491
Oh, don't stay on my account.
1687
01:44:49,158 --> 01:44:50,659
No, it's something I promised Edna.
1688
01:44:51,494 --> 01:44:53,537
- Have you got time for a cup of tea?
- Yes.
1689
01:44:54,038 --> 01:44:55,122
Reg!
1690
01:44:56,165 --> 01:44:57,792
Are you going to come back after tea?
1691
01:44:59,001 --> 01:45:00,336
I don't see any reason to. Why?
1692
01:45:05,257 --> 01:45:07,009
I think you're pretty bloody good, Reg.
1693
01:45:08,260 --> 01:45:09,220
In your way.
1694
01:45:10,888 --> 01:45:14,183
It's not my way,
but it seems to get you what you want.
1695
01:45:15,684 --> 01:45:16,644
So far.
1696
01:45:17,561 --> 01:45:18,687
But thanks.
1697
01:45:18,687 --> 01:45:19,897
Oh, just a minute.
1698
01:45:25,486 --> 01:45:27,655
-What's this?
-My kidneys. Best English lamb.
1699
01:45:29,698 --> 01:45:31,534
You've been done.
They're New Zealand, thawed.
1700
01:45:34,328 --> 01:45:36,455
The small, clapper irony is that
1701
01:45:36,455 --> 01:45:39,124
I have been trying to join you
for dinner all day,
1702
01:45:39,124 --> 01:45:40,751
not to say for the last month.
1703
01:45:40,751 --> 01:45:42,378
-May I anyway?
-Of course.
1704
01:45:42,378 --> 01:45:44,046
-I'm sorry. We can't.
-Why not?
1705
01:45:44,421 --> 01:45:46,549
Because I've just bought two tickets
for the match tonight
1706
01:45:46,549 --> 01:45:47,508
from one of your porters.
1707
01:45:48,259 --> 01:45:49,468
I'm sorry. Perhaps some other time.
1708
01:45:52,054 --> 01:45:53,055
Thank you.
1709
01:45:54,431 --> 01:45:55,933
Do we have to go to the match?
1710
01:45:55,933 --> 01:45:57,142
Yes. It's an important one.
1711
01:45:57,601 --> 01:45:59,520
But some other time.
Now I'd like that tea, please.
1712
01:46:01,146 --> 01:46:05,401
Reg! I didn't know that
you supported a London club too, Reg.
1713
01:46:06,485 --> 01:46:07,778
Leeds are away to Arsenal.
1714
01:46:08,070 --> 01:46:10,698
Ah. Well, yes, enjoy it.
1715
01:46:11,323 --> 01:46:12,408
Thanks.
1716
01:46:13,659 --> 01:46:14,785
Reg!
1717
01:46:19,623 --> 01:46:21,584
Will you wear it all, then?
1718
01:46:22,668 --> 01:46:23,669
Sorry? What? Wear what?
1719
01:46:24,545 --> 01:46:26,338
Your gear and tackle and trim.
1720
01:46:27,464 --> 01:46:29,049
Have you got it with you? I...
1721
01:46:30,509 --> 01:46:31,635
What?
1722
01:46:31,635 --> 01:46:33,554
Your scarf and cloth cap and rattle.
1723
01:46:34,179 --> 01:46:36,140
Your rosettes and hobnail boots.
1724
01:46:36,932 --> 01:46:39,685
Isn't that your road, any road,
up your road?
1725
01:46:40,728 --> 01:46:41,812
I'm parched.
1726
01:46:42,855 --> 01:46:44,565
Can we compare customs some other time?
1727
01:46:51,322 --> 01:46:52,281
Reg!
1728
01:46:55,159 --> 01:46:56,118
Reg!
1729
01:47:14,428 --> 01:47:17,348
No, it's not customs, Reg.
1730
01:47:18,599 --> 01:47:20,059
It's you, old cheese.
1731
01:47:21,602 --> 01:47:26,482
Personally, I don't give a fuck
that mum and dad live up Leeds and all,
1732
01:47:27,608 --> 01:47:29,944
or that the whole tribe of you
go to football matches
1733
01:47:29,944 --> 01:47:32,112
looking like the back page
of the Daily Mirror
1734
01:47:33,447 --> 01:47:36,241
and bellow "Oop t'Rovers"
and “Clobber busturds"
1735
01:47:37,701 --> 01:47:41,330
or own a butcher's shop with
"cush on t'side" from parking tickets.
1736
01:47:41,330 --> 01:47:43,958
I really don't, old cheese.
No, no, no, no.
1737
01:47:44,249 --> 01:47:48,837
What is... culturally entertaining...
1738
01:47:50,381 --> 01:47:51,340
is yourself.
1739
01:47:53,634 --> 01:47:55,260
I'm talking about your...
1740
01:47:56,553 --> 01:47:58,806
hypocrisy, old darling.
1741
01:48:00,015 --> 01:48:01,558
Is that what you're talking about?
1742
01:48:02,518 --> 01:48:06,313
Because you are only good
at getting what you want
1743
01:48:07,314 --> 01:48:10,359
because you are a fraction
of a fake, old potato.
1744
01:48:10,359 --> 01:48:11,402
You really are.
1745
01:48:13,862 --> 01:48:17,199
You don't show yourself up north
except twice a year, do you,
1746
01:48:17,199 --> 01:48:19,618
with your latest boy or summat in tow.
1747
01:48:19,618 --> 01:48:23,372
And I bet you get all your football
out of t'Guardian and from television,
1748
01:48:24,164 --> 01:48:27,751
except when you flash a couple of tickets
at some soft southern bugger--
1749
01:48:27,751 --> 01:48:30,170
Oh, sorry.
Do you object to that word, old fruit?
1750
01:48:30,921 --> 01:48:32,297
...like me,
1751
01:48:32,297 --> 01:48:36,343
to show some softer southern bugger
like him
1752
01:48:37,678 --> 01:48:39,013
just how tough you are.
1753
01:48:40,723 --> 01:48:44,685
Tell me.
Did you cling consciously to funny vowels,
1754
01:48:44,685 --> 01:48:46,145
or did you learn them all afresh?
1755
01:48:46,478 --> 01:48:50,190
I ask because you're not Yorkshire.
You're not working class.
1756
01:48:51,150 --> 01:48:55,195
You're just a lucky parvenu fairy,
old fig,
1757
01:48:56,363 --> 01:48:59,033
and to tell you the truth,
you make me want to throw up.
1758
01:49:00,367 --> 01:49:01,869
Pardon. “Gap“!
1759
01:49:03,078 --> 01:49:05,914
All over your characteristically
suede shoes.
1760
01:49:05,914 --> 01:49:07,583
-Shut up, Ben!
-Why? What's the matter?
1761
01:49:07,583 --> 01:49:08,876
Have I upset him?
1762
01:49:09,418 --> 01:49:10,502
Have I upset you, Reg?
1763
01:49:11,837 --> 01:49:14,131
Eh, I thought you liked
straightforward blokes,
1764
01:49:14,506 --> 01:49:18,093
plain talk, brass tacks, hard dos
and no bloody metaphors.
1765
01:49:20,054 --> 01:49:22,681
I don't blame you
for being ashamed of t'folks,
1766
01:49:23,390 --> 01:49:26,101
except when you try to come
the simple sod--
1767
01:49:26,101 --> 01:49:27,686
Sorry, homo. Oh, sorry!
1768
01:49:29,104 --> 01:49:30,064
Bloke.
1769
01:49:30,773 --> 01:49:32,900
-I'd feel t'same in thy clogs.
-Ben!
1770
01:49:34,151 --> 01:49:35,194
Is there anything else?
1771
01:49:37,029 --> 01:49:38,072
Yes.
1772
01:49:40,199 --> 01:49:43,744
Tell me.
Did you have a plain talk and brass tacks
1773
01:49:43,744 --> 01:49:45,412
about yourself with mum, laddie,
1774
01:49:45,412 --> 01:49:48,665
when she's back from pasting tickets
on t'cars, lud, eh?
1775
01:49:49,875 --> 01:49:52,044
Or with dud, lud,
while he's flogging offal, lud?
1776
01:49:52,044 --> 01:49:54,588
Eh, thou'd get fair dos there all right,
wouldn't thee, eh,
1777
01:49:54,588 --> 01:49:56,090
from our dud with his strup?
1778
01:49:56,632 --> 01:49:58,509
Or does he take thee down to t'local
1779
01:49:58,509 --> 01:50:01,178
and introduce thee round
to all t'other cloth caps?
1780
01:50:01,178 --> 01:50:03,639
"Eh! This is our Reg. He's punsy.
1781
01:50:04,014 --> 01:50:07,059
Oop, sorry, Reg, lud. Homosexual.
1782
01:50:07,893 --> 01:50:11,146
Eh, come as a right surprise
to mother and me, it did,
1783
01:50:11,522 --> 01:50:14,274
mother joost frying oop
best tripe and garbage
1784
01:50:14,858 --> 01:50:19,113
and me settling down with gnomes
to a good read of Mazo de la Roche."
1785
01:50:26,078 --> 01:50:27,037
Oh, I see.
1786
01:50:27,913 --> 01:50:30,499
The information for all this drollery
comes from you.
1787
01:50:32,292 --> 01:50:33,752
Perhaps you'd better sort him out.
1788
01:50:34,378 --> 01:50:35,504
Reg!
1789
01:50:35,504 --> 01:50:36,672
Come here, lad!
1790
01:50:37,422 --> 01:50:39,424
You come and sort me out.
1791
01:50:40,759 --> 01:50:41,844
Come on, lad.
1792
01:50:44,054 --> 01:50:45,222
It's mum's work!
1793
01:50:47,307 --> 01:50:50,769
Cloomp, cloomp, cloomp, aye,
tha's the mother's feet, Reg.
1794
01:50:52,855 --> 01:50:54,773
I don't like these games, Joey.
You know that.
1795
01:50:55,899 --> 01:50:58,235
Going to cook my kidneys after all, then?
1796
01:50:59,570 --> 01:51:00,571
Is that what you want?
1797
01:51:01,155 --> 01:51:02,489
-Come on.
-No, I'm not playing with you.
1798
01:51:03,282 --> 01:51:04,908
So don't say one more word.
1799
01:51:07,035 --> 01:51:07,995
Not a word.
1800
01:51:09,997 --> 01:51:10,956
Reg!
1801
01:51:14,668 --> 01:51:15,627
Darling.
1802
01:51:17,296 --> 01:51:18,255
Come on then.
1803
01:51:19,590 --> 01:51:20,716
Old sod,
1804
01:51:21,925 --> 01:51:22,885
fairy,
1805
01:51:23,886 --> 01:51:24,928
punsy.
1806
01:51:25,470 --> 01:51:26,513
Don't!
1807
01:51:29,725 --> 01:51:31,685
There. Is that what you wanted?
1808
01:51:35,355 --> 01:51:36,315
Oh.
1809
01:51:37,774 --> 01:51:38,901
Sorry.
1810
01:51:38,901 --> 01:51:41,445
Living theatre.
Next time around in Polish.
1811
01:51:41,862 --> 01:51:42,905
Oh.
1812
01:51:43,572 --> 01:51:44,865
I-- I'll come back later.
1813
01:51:48,285 --> 01:51:49,828
For a kick in my balls, eh?
1814
01:51:50,579 --> 01:51:52,331
Why should she be left out?
1815
01:51:53,123 --> 01:51:54,374
Oh, you're pitiful.
1816
01:51:56,418 --> 01:51:57,461
Pitiful.
1817
01:52:00,172 --> 01:52:02,841
This man that you've given me
all that talk about.
1818
01:52:04,593 --> 01:52:06,094
That you made me jealous of.
1819
01:52:08,931 --> 01:52:10,807
Still, couldn't take it, could you,
1820
01:52:11,725 --> 01:52:12,768
butcher's boy?
1821
01:52:14,144 --> 01:52:15,103
It was silly.
1822
01:52:17,439 --> 01:52:19,191
You'll have to outgrow that kind of thing,
Joey.
1823
01:52:27,658 --> 01:52:29,201
Oh.
1824
01:52:45,175 --> 01:52:47,219
Your bugger's made me bleed again.
1825
01:52:53,892 --> 01:52:57,688
You're beginning to get little wrinkles
around your eyes, did you know?
1826
01:52:59,481 --> 01:53:01,066
Are they laughter wrinkles,
1827
01:53:02,234 --> 01:53:05,654
or is it age,
creeping up you on little crow's feet?
1828
01:53:08,615 --> 01:53:10,575
You'll be one of those with a crepe neck.
1829
01:53:12,035 --> 01:53:14,496
I'll be one of the fat ones
with a purple face.
1830
01:53:16,164 --> 01:53:17,124
Reg will be...
1831
01:53:21,086 --> 01:53:26,216
I was watching you while you were shaving
the morning that you were going to Leeds.
1832
01:53:28,010 --> 01:53:30,846
If you'd moved your eyes half an inch,
you'd have seen me in the mirror.
1833
01:53:32,264 --> 01:53:37,227
I was standing behind you,
studying your neck and my jowls.
1834
01:53:37,686 --> 01:53:38,645
I saw you.
1835
01:53:40,856 --> 01:53:41,815
Oh.
1836
01:53:43,817 --> 01:53:46,278
Well, what did you think of all that
with our Reg then, eh?
1837
01:53:46,820 --> 01:53:47,904
I thought it was creepy.
1838
01:53:49,781 --> 01:53:51,658
I wonder what your next will be like.
1839
01:53:51,658 --> 01:53:53,535
Don't be afraid to bring him home, dear,
will you?
1840
01:53:53,827 --> 01:53:54,911
I do worry so.
1841
01:53:55,245 --> 01:53:57,622
There isn't going to be a next one.
At least, not for some time.
1842
01:53:58,081 --> 01:53:59,124
Oh, really?
1843
01:54:00,250 --> 01:54:01,626
I think that's a good plan.
1844
01:54:02,044 --> 01:54:04,046
Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder.
1845
01:54:04,046 --> 01:54:05,297
I'm moving in with Reg.
1846
01:54:06,381 --> 01:54:07,716
Don't think he'll have you, dear,
1847
01:54:07,716 --> 01:54:10,510
after all' your indiscretions
and sauciness.
1848
01:54:10,510 --> 01:54:11,595
Yes, he will.
1849
01:54:15,182 --> 01:54:17,142
You'll go running after him, will you?
1850
01:54:18,393 --> 01:54:19,519
How demeaning.
1851
01:54:20,854 --> 01:54:22,898
Possibly. But it's better
than having him run after me.
1852
01:54:22,898 --> 01:54:24,733
I've been through that once.
I couldn't face it again.
1853
01:54:26,943 --> 01:54:29,905
You love him then, eh, your butcher's boy?
1854
01:54:33,200 --> 01:54:35,452
Actually, he's not a butcher's boy,
in point of fact.
1855
01:54:53,261 --> 01:54:55,222
His father teaches maths
at the university.
1856
01:54:55,597 --> 01:54:58,600
His mother's a social worker.
They live in an ugly Edwardian house.
1857
01:55:06,400 --> 01:55:08,610
Ah, of course.
1858
01:55:12,072 --> 01:55:14,116
Quite nice and creepy.
1859
01:55:17,327 --> 01:55:21,039
Creepy, creepy, creepy, creepy.
1860
01:55:22,082 --> 01:55:23,125
Sorry.
1861
01:55:24,501 --> 01:55:25,961
Thanks, anyway, for the fiction.
1862
01:55:27,921 --> 01:55:30,465
So... you love him, then?
1863
01:55:31,466 --> 01:55:34,344
No. But I've got to get away from you,
haven't I?
1864
01:55:36,346 --> 01:55:37,305
Really?
1865
01:55:38,932 --> 01:55:39,891
Why?
1866
01:55:41,351 --> 01:55:43,228
For one thing,
I'd like to get some work done.
1867
01:55:44,563 --> 01:55:46,898
During your married year,
I did quite a bit. I'd like to finish it.
1868
01:55:48,733 --> 01:55:49,734
What work?
1869
01:55:50,485 --> 01:55:51,653
My edition of Herrick.
1870
01:55:53,363 --> 01:55:55,282
If the consequence
of your sexual appetites
1871
01:55:55,282 --> 01:55:57,284
is another edition of unwanted verse,
1872
01:55:57,909 --> 01:56:00,662
then you have an academic duty
to control yourself.
1873
01:56:02,956 --> 01:56:06,209
Could I also mention,
in a spirit of unbecoming humility,
1874
01:56:06,209 --> 01:56:09,838
that if I hadn't taken over your studies
1875
01:56:09,838 --> 01:56:12,299
when you were
an averagely dim undergraduate,
1876
01:56:13,592 --> 01:56:15,218
you'd never have got a first.
1877
01:56:16,094 --> 01:56:18,847
Your nature is to settle
for decent seconds,
1878
01:56:20,515 --> 01:56:22,684
indecent seconds, in Reg's case.
1879
01:56:23,477 --> 01:56:24,519
I know.
1880
01:56:26,438 --> 01:56:28,273
But that was in the days
when you still taught.
1881
01:56:29,483 --> 01:56:31,026
Now you spread futility, Ben.
1882
01:56:31,026 --> 01:56:33,445
It creeps in,
like your dirty socks into my drawers,
1883
01:56:33,445 --> 01:56:34,863
or my clean ones onto your feet.
1884
01:56:35,947 --> 01:56:37,616
Or your cigarette butts everywhere.
1885
01:56:37,616 --> 01:56:39,493
Or your stubble and shaving cream
onto our razor.
1886
01:56:40,118 --> 01:56:41,661
Or your voice, booming out nursery rhymes
1887
01:56:41,661 --> 01:56:43,455
into every corner of this department,
it seems to me.
1888
01:56:44,039 --> 01:56:45,540
-Or--
-Shut up.
1889
01:56:50,754 --> 01:56:52,047
That's rehearsed.
1890
01:56:53,507 --> 01:56:54,716
Thousands of times.
1891
01:57:29,167 --> 01:57:31,920
I'm sorry it had to be today,
what with Anne and Tom.
1892
01:57:33,255 --> 01:57:34,214
I would have waited.
1893
01:57:35,048 --> 01:57:37,968
Which shows
you have no sense of classical form.
1894
01:57:40,345 --> 01:57:42,264
We are preserving the unities.
1895
01:57:42,764 --> 01:57:45,642
The use of messengers
has been quite skilful.
1896
01:57:50,146 --> 01:57:51,356
All right. All right.
1897
01:57:52,399 --> 01:57:55,110
It doesn't really matter very much.
1898
01:57:56,111 --> 01:57:57,279
What will you do?
1899
01:58:04,244 --> 01:58:06,830
Could you, do you think,
staunch the flow of blood? Mmm?
1900
01:58:19,301 --> 01:58:20,260
It's just a bubble.
1901
01:58:23,013 --> 01:58:26,933
Of course, the trouble with
all these confessions, revelations,
1902
01:58:26,933 --> 01:58:30,437
clean breaks and epiphanies--
shouldn't we call them these days--
1903
01:58:31,062 --> 01:58:33,440
is that cluttered contact goes on.
1904
01:58:35,233 --> 01:58:37,444
For instance, we still share this room.
1905
01:58:39,154 --> 01:58:41,406
You're going to have to live
with your past,
1906
01:58:41,406 --> 01:58:43,867
day after day and as messily as ever.
1907
01:58:44,409 --> 01:58:45,869
I'll see to that.
1908
01:58:48,622 --> 01:58:51,249
-May I?
-Of course. Of course you may, Edna.
1909
01:58:51,249 --> 01:58:52,500
It's your turn.
1910
01:58:53,668 --> 01:58:55,754
Now you'll really be able
to spread yourself.
1911
01:58:55,754 --> 01:58:56,963
It's much more sensible.
1912
01:58:57,464 --> 01:59:00,008
I've moved out all my files.
What can I do now?
1913
01:59:11,519 --> 01:59:12,604
I can manage down here.
1914
01:59:15,690 --> 01:59:18,902
Well, I'm glad
I made one of you take advantage.
1915
01:59:27,661 --> 01:59:29,704
I've quietened down, Ben,
you'll be glad to hear.
1916
01:59:30,455 --> 01:59:33,416
But I want to say I'm sorry about my--
my little outburst just now.
1917
01:59:33,958 --> 01:59:35,418
I must learn not to be so sensitive.
1918
01:59:35,919 --> 01:59:38,963
I suspect it's the only way
with this new generation.
1919
01:59:41,341 --> 01:59:43,593
Yes, they are rather frightening.
1920
01:59:44,010 --> 01:59:46,721
Oh, I don't imagine
you're frightened of them.
1921
01:59:49,140 --> 01:59:50,850
I haven't enough pride.
1922
01:59:52,560 --> 01:59:54,896
I shall continue to throw myself
on their mercy.
1923
01:59:59,317 --> 02:00:03,238
I, uh, haven't congratulated you
on your book.
1924
02:00:04,572 --> 02:00:06,658
Wouldn't it have been awful
if someone had got in ahead of me?
1925
02:00:07,659 --> 02:00:10,203
Twenty years. I'm really rather ashamed.
1926
02:00:11,454 --> 02:00:13,289
Will you go on to someone else now?
1927
02:00:14,582 --> 02:00:15,709
I don't know.
1928
02:00:17,127 --> 02:00:20,588
You know, last night,
I played a little game.
1929
02:00:21,256 --> 02:00:24,467
I closed my eyes and I turned over
whole groups of pages at a time
1930
02:00:24,467 --> 02:00:25,844
and then I looked at a page.
1931
02:00:26,720 --> 02:00:29,389
It was in the commentary
on a letter from his sad wife.
1932
02:00:30,515 --> 02:00:33,143
And I remembered immediately
when I started working on it.
1933
02:00:34,102 --> 02:00:36,688
It was in Ursula's cottage
in Ockham, Surrey.
1934
02:00:37,689 --> 02:00:40,024
I can even remember the weather.
1935
02:00:42,902 --> 02:00:44,404
How's the book on Eliot, by the way?
1936
02:00:45,947 --> 02:00:48,283
Oh, it has a good 20 years to go.
1937
02:00:48,783 --> 02:00:50,785
Oh, I don't believe that.
1938
02:00:50,785 --> 02:00:53,246
James is always saying
how quickly you get through things.
1939
02:00:53,663 --> 02:00:55,582
I'm sure you'll be finished
with Eliot in no time.
1940
02:00:56,624 --> 02:01:00,295
But don't dally with him.
Let me be a lesson to you.
1941
02:01:02,088 --> 02:01:04,466
Do you still go to Ursula's cottage?
1942
02:01:06,468 --> 02:01:08,094
Oh, not in the same way.
1943
02:01:09,095 --> 02:01:10,764
She got married during chapter six.
1944
02:01:14,517 --> 02:01:15,560
Oh, hello.
1945
02:01:16,770 --> 02:01:20,356
-Mr. Gardner's here.
-Oh! Yes.
1946
02:01:20,356 --> 02:01:21,691
Will you go in, Mr. Gardner?
1947
02:01:29,365 --> 02:01:32,827
Well, Mr. Gardner,
you're here for your Eliot.
1948
02:01:33,203 --> 02:01:34,329
Yeah, please.
1949
02:01:35,538 --> 02:01:38,541
Tell me. What did I say in the pub?
1950
02:01:40,460 --> 02:01:41,419
Well...
1951
02:01:43,004 --> 02:01:46,132
I told you I couldn't stand
Miss Shaft's seminars
1952
02:01:47,175 --> 02:01:49,552
and you told me
I was interesting enough to do Eliot,
1953
02:01:50,553 --> 02:01:51,888
and that I ought to go and see James.
1954
02:01:53,765 --> 02:01:55,809
You said he'd pass the buck back to you
1955
02:01:55,809 --> 02:01:59,062
because whenever he had a problem,
he converted it into a buck and passed it.
1956
02:02:00,939 --> 02:02:02,565
Actually, you called him Cottontail.
1957
02:02:04,901 --> 02:02:06,903
Oh, did I? Hmm.
1958
02:02:10,156 --> 02:02:13,284
And here we both wonderfully are.
1959
02:02:13,952 --> 02:02:14,911
Yeah.
1960
02:02:15,829 --> 02:02:16,955
Thank God.
1961
02:02:18,456 --> 02:02:19,499
Well, let's get going.
1962
02:02:26,756 --> 02:02:29,968
Can you start by reading me a passage,
please?
1963
02:02:31,594 --> 02:02:32,637
Hmm.
1964
02:02:33,680 --> 02:02:34,681
There.
1965
02:02:35,723 --> 02:02:37,267
-Do you mind?
-No, I'd like that.
1966
02:02:37,684 --> 02:02:38,685
Thank you.
1967
02:02:46,442 --> 02:02:47,485
Oh, sorry.
1968
02:02:49,737 --> 02:02:50,905
This is Mr. Gardner.
1969
02:02:52,824 --> 02:02:54,242
Mr. Gardner, Mr. Keystone.
1970
02:02:55,118 --> 02:02:56,286
-Hello.
-Mr. Gardner.
1971
02:02:58,288 --> 02:03:02,125
Once, some years ago,
I taught Mr. Keystone.
1972
02:03:03,793 --> 02:03:07,255
During our first tutorial, we spent
a few moments discussing his clothes.
1973
02:03:07,755 --> 02:03:12,427
Then he read me some Eliot.
Today, I'm actually wearing his socks.
1974
02:03:14,220 --> 02:03:19,100
Those are the key points in a relationship
that now goes mainly back.
1975
02:03:20,810 --> 02:03:22,896
So you see, Mr. Gardner,
you had better be careful...
1976
02:03:23,938 --> 02:03:25,356
if you value your socks.
1977
02:03:33,448 --> 02:03:34,616
Please begin.
1978
02:03:37,577 --> 02:03:39,037
"In that open field
1979
02:03:39,579 --> 02:03:43,333
If you do not come too close,
if you do not come too close,
1980
02:03:44,250 --> 02:03:46,210
On a summer midnight,
you can hear the music
1981
02:03:46,210 --> 02:03:48,004
Of the weak pipe and the little drum
1982
02:03:48,630 --> 02:03:50,506
And see them dancing around the bonfire
1983
02:03:51,507 --> 02:03:53,384
The association of man and woman
1984
02:03:53,801 --> 02:03:58,056
In daunsinge, signifying matrimonie--
1985
02:03:58,932 --> 02:04:01,434
A dignified and commodious sacrament.
1986
02:04:02,101 --> 02:04:05,355
Two and two, necessarye conjunction,
1987
02:04:06,356 --> 02:04:08,274
Holding eche other by the hand or the arm
1988
02:04:09,150 --> 02:04:10,693
Whiche betokeneth concorde.
1989
02:04:11,694 --> 02:04:13,363
Round and round the fire
1990
02:04:14,030 --> 02:04:16,532
Leaping through the flames,
or joined in circles,
1991
02:04:18,368 --> 02:04:20,453
Rustically solemn or in rustic laughter
1992
02:04:21,955 --> 02:04:23,831
Lifting heavy feet in clumsy shoes,
1993
02:04:24,874 --> 02:04:28,878
Earth feet, loam feet,
lifted in country mirth
1994
02:04:29,796 --> 02:04:32,966
Mirth of those long since under Earth
Nourishing--"
1995
02:04:32,966 --> 02:04:35,093
So you're Gardner, are you?
1996
02:04:37,428 --> 02:04:38,429
Yeah.
1997
02:04:40,181 --> 02:04:42,892
"Ninny Nanny Netticoat,
In a white petticoat,
1998
02:04:43,059 --> 02:04:44,686
With a red nose.
1999
02:04:44,686 --> 02:04:48,231
The longer he stands,
The shorter he grows."
2000
02:04:49,816 --> 02:04:50,900
What?
2001
02:04:53,027 --> 02:04:54,779
I'm moving on, Mr. Gardner.
2002
02:04:55,947 --> 02:04:57,407
I'm breaking new ground.
2003
02:04:59,075 --> 02:05:00,034
Oh.
2004
02:05:01,327 --> 02:05:02,704
Furthermore, where's your hat?
2005
02:05:06,833 --> 02:05:08,001
I don't wear it anymore.
2006
02:05:08,835 --> 02:05:12,380
But did you wear it
when you bombed the Aristotle Collection?
2007
02:05:14,340 --> 02:05:18,177
And will you wear it in your raids
on Dapply and Parsley, eh?
2008
02:05:19,220 --> 02:05:20,346
What?
2009
02:05:20,847 --> 02:05:22,515
It won't do you any good.
2010
02:05:24,058 --> 02:05:29,689
The Aristotle Collection stood alone,
vulnerable, unreadable, and so, unread.
2011
02:05:30,565 --> 02:05:33,026
But Dapply and Parsley are scattered
2012
02:05:33,026 --> 02:05:36,029
in nursery consciousnesses
throughout the land.
2013
02:05:36,654 --> 02:05:39,240
They can still be tongued with fire.
2014
02:05:41,159 --> 02:05:42,618
What are you talking about?
2015
02:05:44,287 --> 02:05:47,081
I wasn't anywhere near the university
library when that happened.
2016
02:05:48,374 --> 02:05:50,334
I don't even know what it was about,
properly.
2017
02:05:53,546 --> 02:05:57,300
No, you're a personal relationships
type chappie, I can sense that.
2018
02:05:59,385 --> 02:06:00,344
Please go away.
2019
02:06:02,138 --> 02:06:03,514
Go back to Miss Shaft.
2020
02:06:07,852 --> 02:06:08,811
But I can't...
2021
02:06:10,938 --> 02:06:12,023
after all that trouble.
2022
02:06:13,399 --> 02:06:14,484
Trouble for you,
2023
02:06:16,027 --> 02:06:17,236
fun for me.
2024
02:06:20,823 --> 02:06:23,451
Go away, Gardner,
and take your laundry with you.
2025
02:06:24,786 --> 02:06:28,289
I don't want to begin again.
It's all been a ghastly mistake.
2026
02:06:30,625 --> 02:06:32,126
I don't find you interesting anymore.
2027
02:06:34,212 --> 02:06:35,505
You're not what I mean at all,
2028
02:06:37,006 --> 02:06:38,925
not what I mean at all.
2029
02:06:41,677 --> 02:06:43,471
I'm too old to play with the likes of you.
157790
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