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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,374 --> 00:00:07,874 (upbeat orchestral music) 2 00:01:10,011 --> 00:01:12,678 (babies crying) 3 00:01:19,349 --> 00:01:22,182 (chisel pounding) 4 00:01:51,053 --> 00:01:53,674 (whistling) 5 00:01:53,674 --> 00:01:56,555 (tongue clicking) 6 00:01:56,555 --> 00:01:58,888 (whistling) 7 00:02:02,022 --> 00:02:04,855 (tongue clicking) 8 00:02:22,924 --> 00:02:24,410 - Yeah, D.B. 9 00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:26,210 Oh, just cleaning out the deadwood. 10 00:02:26,210 --> 00:02:27,043 Okay. 11 00:02:28,020 --> 00:02:30,010 - Look, Mr. Connell, I just can't afford 12 00:02:30,010 --> 00:02:32,410 to be without work right now, not even for a day. 13 00:02:32,410 --> 00:02:34,060 I've got a mother and two kid sisters to-- 14 00:02:34,060 --> 00:02:36,290 - [Secretary] More good luck telegrams. 15 00:02:36,290 --> 00:02:38,310 - Well, you know how it is. 16 00:02:38,310 --> 00:02:40,350 I've just got to keep on working, see? 17 00:02:40,350 --> 00:02:42,730 - Sorry, sister, I was sent down here to clean house. 18 00:02:42,730 --> 00:02:44,918 I told you, I can't use your column anymore. 19 00:02:44,918 --> 00:02:46,114 It's lavender and old lace. 20 00:02:46,114 --> 00:02:47,633 - Sir? - Send those other people in. 21 00:02:47,633 --> 00:02:48,990 - I'll tell you what I'll do. 22 00:02:48,990 --> 00:02:50,650 I get $30. 23 00:02:50,650 --> 00:02:52,930 I'll take $25, $20 if necessary. 24 00:02:52,930 --> 00:02:53,870 I'll do anything you say. 25 00:02:53,870 --> 00:02:55,370 - It isn't the money. 26 00:02:55,370 --> 00:02:56,440 We're after circulation. 27 00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:58,030 What we need is fireworks, 28 00:02:58,030 --> 00:02:59,881 people who can hit with sledgehammers, start arguments. 29 00:02:59,881 --> 00:03:00,714 - Oh, I can do that. 30 00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,300 I know this town inside-out. 31 00:03:02,300 --> 00:03:03,133 Oh, give me a chance, please. 32 00:03:03,133 --> 00:03:05,790 - All right, come in, come in, come in. 33 00:03:05,790 --> 00:03:07,370 Cashier's got your check. 34 00:03:07,370 --> 00:03:08,950 Who are these people? 35 00:03:08,950 --> 00:03:10,990 Gibbs, Crawley, Cunningham, Giles 36 00:03:12,140 --> 00:03:13,099 Hey you, sister. 37 00:03:13,099 --> 00:03:14,187 Don't forget to get out your last column 38 00:03:14,187 --> 00:03:15,713 before you pick up your check. 39 00:03:17,803 --> 00:03:20,470 (door slamming) 40 00:03:27,271 --> 00:03:30,438 (trashcan clattering) 41 00:03:34,790 --> 00:03:37,070 - You're a couple of sticks shy in your column, Ann. 42 00:03:37,070 --> 00:03:39,110 - Big, rich slob like D.B. Norton buys a paper 43 00:03:39,110 --> 00:03:40,890 and 40 heads are chopped off. 44 00:03:40,890 --> 00:03:43,210 - Did you get it, too? - Yeah. 45 00:03:43,210 --> 00:03:44,043 You too? 46 00:03:45,015 --> 00:03:46,330 Oh, Joe. 47 00:03:46,330 --> 00:03:47,430 Oh, I'm sorry darling. 48 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,580 Why don't we tear the building down? 49 00:03:50,580 --> 00:03:51,760 - Before you do, Ann, 50 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:53,530 perhaps you'd better finish this column. 51 00:03:53,530 --> 00:03:55,083 - Yeah, lavender and old lace. 52 00:03:57,170 --> 00:03:58,430 Wait, Joe. 53 00:03:58,430 --> 00:03:59,263 Wait. 54 00:04:02,979 --> 00:04:04,979 He wants fireworks, huh? 55 00:04:05,957 --> 00:04:07,089 Okay. 56 00:04:07,089 --> 00:04:10,672 (typewriter keys clacking) 57 00:04:24,267 --> 00:04:25,100 Here. 58 00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:28,863 - Below is a letter which reached my desk this morning. 59 00:04:28,863 --> 00:04:30,350 It's a commentary on what we 60 00:04:30,350 --> 00:04:32,490 laughingly call a civilized world. 61 00:04:32,490 --> 00:04:34,610 Dear Miss Mitchell, four years ago, 62 00:04:34,610 --> 00:04:36,310 I was fired outta my job. 63 00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:38,650 Since then, I haven't been able to get another one. 64 00:04:38,650 --> 00:04:41,070 At first I was sore at the state administration 65 00:04:41,070 --> 00:04:43,590 because it's on account of the slimy politics here 66 00:04:43,590 --> 00:04:45,921 we have all this unemployment. 67 00:04:45,921 --> 00:04:47,280 But in looking around, 68 00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:49,280 it seems the whole world's going to pot. 69 00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,450 So, in protest, I'm going to commit suicide 70 00:04:51,450 --> 00:04:53,380 by jumping off the City Hall roof. 71 00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:57,040 Signed, a disgusted American citizen, John Doe. 72 00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,760 Editor's note, if you ask this column, 73 00:04:59,760 --> 00:05:02,890 the wrong people are jumping off the roofs. 74 00:05:02,890 --> 00:05:05,940 Hey, Ann, this is the old fak-a-roo, isn't it? 75 00:05:05,940 --> 00:05:07,947 - Nevermind that, Joe, go ahead. 76 00:05:07,947 --> 00:05:10,682 (laughing) 77 00:05:10,682 --> 00:05:13,099 (chattering) 78 00:05:19,593 --> 00:05:20,426 (glass shattering) 79 00:05:20,426 --> 00:05:23,343 (workers laughing) 80 00:05:30,100 --> 00:05:31,943 - And it's because of the slimy politics 81 00:05:31,943 --> 00:05:33,910 that we have all this unemployment here. 82 00:05:33,910 --> 00:05:35,670 There it is. 83 00:05:35,670 --> 00:05:37,840 That's D.B. Norton's opening attack on the governor. 84 00:05:37,840 --> 00:05:40,280 - Why, Jim, it's just a letter sent into a column. 85 00:05:40,280 --> 00:05:42,490 - No, no, I can smell it, that's Norton. 86 00:05:42,490 --> 00:05:43,435 - [Governor] Good morning, gentlemen. 87 00:05:43,435 --> 00:05:44,711 - Good morning, Governor. - Good morning, Governor. 88 00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:45,700 - [Governor] You're here rather early. 89 00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:48,550 - Governor, did you happen to see this in the New Bulletin? 90 00:05:48,550 --> 00:05:49,780 - Yes. 91 00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:52,000 I had it served with my breakfast this morning. 92 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:53,870 - Jim thinks it's D.B. Norton at work. 93 00:05:53,870 --> 00:05:54,820 - Of course it is. 94 00:05:54,820 --> 00:05:56,300 - Oh, come, Jim. 95 00:05:56,300 --> 00:05:57,410 That little item? 96 00:05:57,410 --> 00:05:59,727 D.B. Norton does things in a much bigger way. 97 00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:01,263 - {Jim] This is his opening attack on you, Governor, 98 00:06:01,263 --> 00:06:03,144 take my word for it. 99 00:06:03,144 --> 00:06:04,820 What did he buy a paper for? 100 00:06:04,820 --> 00:06:07,600 Why did he engage a high-pressure editor like Connell for? 101 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,100 He's in the oil business. 102 00:06:09,100 --> 00:06:11,080 I tell you, Governor, he's after your scalp. 103 00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:13,760 - All right, Jim, all right, don't burst a blood vessel. 104 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:16,145 I'll look into it. 105 00:06:16,145 --> 00:06:17,157 - [Secretary] Yes sir? 106 00:06:17,157 --> 00:06:19,940 - Get me Spencer of the Daily Chronicle please. 107 00:06:19,940 --> 00:06:21,820 - Yes, yes, I saw it, Governor. 108 00:06:21,820 --> 00:06:23,750 If you ask me, that's a phony letter. 109 00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:26,060 Why, that gag has got whiskers on it. 110 00:06:26,060 --> 00:06:26,893 Hmm? 111 00:06:26,893 --> 00:06:27,920 Okay, I'll get the mayor 112 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,850 and maybe the Chamber of Commerce to go after them. 113 00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:32,400 Get Mayor Lovett on the phone. 114 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,850 - Sorry, the mayor's busy on the other phone. 115 00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:35,913 - Yes, I know, Mrs. Brewster. 116 00:06:35,913 --> 00:06:38,180 It's a terrible reflection on our city. 117 00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:39,353 I've had a dozen calls already. 118 00:06:39,353 --> 00:06:40,780 - [Man] Spencer at the Chronicle. 119 00:06:40,780 --> 00:06:42,240 - Hold him. - Just a minute. 120 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,160 - Yes, Mrs. Brewster, I'm listening. 121 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,820 - I insist that this John Doe man be found 122 00:06:46,820 --> 00:06:48,120 and given a job at once. 123 00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:49,620 Now, if something isn't done about it, 124 00:06:49,620 --> 00:06:51,295 I'll call out the whole auxiliary. 125 00:06:51,295 --> 00:06:53,302 and the junior auxiliary. 126 00:06:53,302 --> 00:06:55,281 We'll hold a meeting and see that-- 127 00:06:55,281 --> 00:06:56,649 - Yes, Spency? 128 00:06:56,649 --> 00:06:57,580 Who? 129 00:06:57,580 --> 00:06:58,720 The governor? 130 00:06:58,720 --> 00:06:59,553 Well, what about me? 131 00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:01,150 It's my building he's jumping off of, 132 00:07:01,150 --> 00:07:02,319 and I'm up for reelection too. 133 00:07:02,319 --> 00:07:03,465 (shushing) What are you doing? 134 00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:04,656 Get Connell at the Bulletin. 135 00:07:04,656 --> 00:07:06,620 Why, he's liable to go right past my-- 136 00:07:06,620 --> 00:07:08,425 - Get me Connell. - What was that? 137 00:07:08,425 --> 00:07:09,450 - What? - Out the window. 138 00:07:09,450 --> 00:07:11,560 Something just flew by. - I didn't see anything. 139 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:13,390 - Well, don't stand there, you idiot, go and look. 140 00:07:13,390 --> 00:07:14,223 Open the window. 141 00:07:15,300 --> 00:07:17,570 Oh, why did he have to pick on my building? 142 00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:18,690 Is there a crowd in the street? 143 00:07:18,690 --> 00:07:19,523 - No, sir. 144 00:07:19,523 --> 00:07:21,630 - Then maybe he's caught on a ledge, look again. 145 00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:24,600 - I think it must've been a seagull. 146 00:07:24,600 --> 00:07:25,520 - A seagull? 147 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,410 What's a seagull doing around the City Hall? 148 00:07:28,410 --> 00:07:29,630 That's a bad omen, isn't it? 149 00:07:29,630 --> 00:07:32,400 - Oh, no sir, the seagull is a lovely bird. 150 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,430 - It's all right, Mrs. Brewster, it was just a seagull. 151 00:07:34,430 --> 00:07:36,270 - Connell? - Nothing's happened yet. 152 00:07:36,270 --> 00:07:37,130 No, I'm watching. 153 00:07:37,130 --> 00:07:38,397 Don't worry, Mrs. Brewster. 154 00:07:38,397 --> 00:07:39,870 Just leave it all to me. 155 00:07:39,870 --> 00:07:41,990 Spencer, I'll call you back. 156 00:07:41,990 --> 00:07:44,014 Hello, Connell? 157 00:07:44,014 --> 00:07:44,847 This is-- 158 00:07:44,847 --> 00:07:45,680 What are you doing? 159 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:46,550 This is the mayor. 160 00:07:46,550 --> 00:07:47,780 - Yes, Mayor Lovett. 161 00:07:47,780 --> 00:07:49,320 How many times are you gonna call me? 162 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:50,217 I've got everybody and his brother 163 00:07:50,217 --> 00:07:52,475 and sister out looking for him. 164 00:07:52,475 --> 00:07:54,075 Did you see the box I'm running? 165 00:07:56,050 --> 00:07:57,130 An appeal to John Doe. 166 00:07:57,130 --> 00:07:58,780 Think it over, John. 167 00:07:58,780 --> 00:08:01,130 Life can be beautiful, says mayor. 168 00:08:01,130 --> 00:08:03,140 If you need a job, apply to editor to this paper, 169 00:08:03,140 --> 00:08:05,180 and so forth and so forth. 170 00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:08,050 Okay, Mayor, I'll let you know as soon as I have something. 171 00:08:08,050 --> 00:08:08,883 What? 172 00:08:09,820 --> 00:08:11,519 Well, pull down the blinds. 173 00:08:11,519 --> 00:08:13,070 - Went up to Miss Mitchell's house, boss. 174 00:08:13,070 --> 00:08:14,383 Boy, she's in a bad way. - Where is she? 175 00:08:14,383 --> 00:08:15,700 - Hey, do you know something? 176 00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,980 She supports her mother and two kids. 177 00:08:16,980 --> 00:08:17,975 What do you know about that? 178 00:08:17,975 --> 00:08:19,177 - Did you find her? - No. 179 00:08:19,177 --> 00:08:20,610 Her mother's awful worried about her. 180 00:08:20,610 --> 00:08:21,443 When she left the house, 181 00:08:21,443 --> 00:08:23,170 said she was going on a roaring drunk. 182 00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:24,003 The girl, I mean. 183 00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:25,642 - Go out and find her. - Sure. 184 00:08:25,642 --> 00:08:26,475 (phone ringing) 185 00:08:26,475 --> 00:08:27,770 Hey, but the biggest thing I didn't tell you. 186 00:08:27,770 --> 00:08:28,912 Her old man's Doc Mitchell. - Hello? 187 00:08:28,912 --> 00:08:30,024 - You know, the doc that saved my mother's life 188 00:08:30,024 --> 00:08:31,230 and wouldn't take any money for it? 189 00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:32,330 You remember that? 190 00:08:32,330 --> 00:08:34,375 Okay, boss, I'll go and look for her. 191 00:08:34,375 --> 00:08:36,625 (clanging) 192 00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:40,940 - Holy smokes, Commissioner, you've had 24 hours. 193 00:08:40,940 --> 00:08:44,543 Okay, Hawkshaw, grab a pencil, here it is again. 194 00:08:45,580 --> 00:08:50,580 About five foot five, brown eyes, light chestnut hair, 195 00:08:51,450 --> 00:08:55,953 and as fine a pair of legs as ever walked into this office. 196 00:08:59,040 --> 00:08:59,873 - Did you wanna see me? 197 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:03,142 - No, I've had the whole Army and Navy out searching for you 198 00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:04,900 because that's a game we play here every day. 199 00:09:04,900 --> 00:09:06,610 - I remember distinctly being fired. 200 00:09:06,610 --> 00:09:07,730 - That's right. 201 00:09:07,730 --> 00:09:08,770 But you have a piece of property 202 00:09:08,770 --> 00:09:10,260 that still belongs to this newspaper 203 00:09:10,260 --> 00:09:11,093 and I'd like to have it. 204 00:09:11,093 --> 00:09:11,926 - What's that? - The letter. 205 00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:12,759 - What letter? 206 00:09:12,759 --> 00:09:14,710 - The letter from John Doe. - Oh. 207 00:09:14,710 --> 00:09:16,260 - [Henry] The whole town's in an uproar. 208 00:09:16,260 --> 00:09:18,486 We've gotta find him and the letter's the only clue. 209 00:09:18,486 --> 00:09:19,319 - There is no letter. 210 00:09:19,319 --> 00:09:20,897 - We'll get a handwriting expert to-- 211 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:24,707 What? - There is no letter. 212 00:09:28,330 --> 00:09:29,163 - Say that again. 213 00:09:29,163 --> 00:09:30,513 - There's no letter, I made it up. 214 00:09:31,550 --> 00:09:32,383 - You made it up? - Mm-hmm. 215 00:09:32,383 --> 00:09:34,928 You said you wanted fireworks. 216 00:09:34,928 --> 00:09:37,930 - Don't you know there are nine jobs waiting for this guy, 217 00:09:37,930 --> 00:09:39,950 22 families wanna board him free, 218 00:09:39,950 --> 00:09:41,527 five women wanna marry him, 219 00:09:41,527 --> 00:09:43,660 and the mayor's practically ready to adopt him? 220 00:09:43,660 --> 00:09:44,493 And you-- 221 00:09:44,493 --> 00:09:45,326 - Just called the morgue, boss. 222 00:09:45,326 --> 00:09:46,200 They say there's a girl there-- 223 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,100 - [Henry] Shut up. 224 00:09:47,940 --> 00:09:48,830 - Ann. 225 00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:49,770 Say, why didn't you-- - Beany. 226 00:09:49,770 --> 00:09:51,440 - Only one thing to do, Hank, 227 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,033 drop the whole business quickly. 228 00:09:53,033 --> 00:09:54,250 - How? - Run a story. 229 00:09:54,250 --> 00:09:57,245 Say John Doe was in here and he's sorry he wrote the letter. 230 00:09:57,245 --> 00:09:58,078 - That's right. 231 00:09:58,078 --> 00:09:58,955 You got it, sure. 232 00:09:58,955 --> 00:10:00,803 He came in here and I let him change his mind. 233 00:10:00,803 --> 00:10:02,550 Bulletin editor saves John Doe's life. 234 00:10:02,550 --> 00:10:03,530 Why, it's perfect. 235 00:10:03,530 --> 00:10:05,090 I'll have Ned write it up. 236 00:10:05,090 --> 00:10:05,923 Oh, Ned? 237 00:10:05,923 --> 00:10:06,865 I've got a story I want you to-- 238 00:10:06,865 --> 00:10:08,210 - Wait a minute. 239 00:10:08,210 --> 00:10:11,210 Listen, you great big wonderful genius of a newspaper man. 240 00:10:11,210 --> 00:10:12,323 You came down here to shoot some life 241 00:10:12,323 --> 00:10:14,010 into this dying paper, didn't you? 242 00:10:14,010 --> 00:10:15,980 Well, the whole town's curious about John Doe, 243 00:10:15,980 --> 00:10:18,100 and, boom, just like that, you're going to bury him. 244 00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:19,100 There's enough circulation in that man 245 00:10:19,100 --> 00:10:21,210 to start a shortage in the ink market. 246 00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:22,690 - In what man? - John Doe. 247 00:10:22,690 --> 00:10:23,523 - What John Doe? 248 00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:26,140 - Our John Doe, the one I made up. 249 00:10:26,140 --> 00:10:28,018 Look, genius, now look. 250 00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:31,010 Suppose there was a John Doe and he walked into this office. 251 00:10:31,010 --> 00:10:31,970 What would you do? 252 00:10:31,970 --> 00:10:33,090 Find him a job and forget about 253 00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:34,700 the whole business, I suppose, huh? 254 00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:35,533 Not me. 255 00:10:35,533 --> 00:10:36,400 I'd make a deal. 256 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:37,380 - A deal? 257 00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:39,270 - Sure, when you get ahold of a stunt that sells papers, 258 00:10:39,270 --> 00:10:41,170 you don't drop it like a hot potato. 259 00:10:41,170 --> 00:10:42,640 Why, this is good for at least a couple of months. 260 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:43,710 You know what I'd do? 261 00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:45,980 Between now and let's say Christmas when he's gonna jump, 262 00:10:45,980 --> 00:10:48,330 I'd run a daily yarn, starting with his boyhood, 263 00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:50,030 his schooling, his first job. 264 00:10:50,030 --> 00:10:52,570 A wide-eyed youngster facing a chaotic world. 265 00:10:52,570 --> 00:10:53,880 The problem of the average man, 266 00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:55,347 of all the John Does in the world. 267 00:10:55,347 --> 00:10:57,480 Now, then comes the drama. 268 00:10:57,480 --> 00:10:58,580 He meets discouragement. 269 00:10:58,580 --> 00:11:00,050 He finds the world has feet of clay. 270 00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:01,080 His ideals crumble. 271 00:11:01,080 --> 00:11:02,050 So what does he do? 272 00:11:02,050 --> 00:11:03,900 He decides to commit suicide in protest 273 00:11:03,900 --> 00:11:05,420 against the state of civilization. 274 00:11:05,420 --> 00:11:06,290 He thinks of the river. 275 00:11:06,290 --> 00:11:08,380 But no, no, he has a better idea. 276 00:11:08,380 --> 00:11:09,213 The City Hall. 277 00:11:09,213 --> 00:11:10,046 Why? 278 00:11:10,046 --> 00:11:11,310 Because he wants to attract attention. 279 00:11:11,310 --> 00:11:12,842 He wants to get a few things off his chest, 280 00:11:12,842 --> 00:11:14,965 and that's the only way he can get himself heard. 281 00:11:14,965 --> 00:11:16,140 - So? - So? 282 00:11:16,140 --> 00:11:18,340 So he writes me a letter and I dig him up. 283 00:11:18,340 --> 00:11:20,120 He pours out his soul to me. 284 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:23,200 And from now on, we quote, I protest, by John Doe. 285 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,650 He protests against all the evils in the world, 286 00:11:25,650 --> 00:11:27,470 the greed, the lust, the hate, the fear, 287 00:11:27,470 --> 00:11:29,410 all of man's inhumanity to man. 288 00:11:29,410 --> 00:11:30,700 Arguments will start. 289 00:11:30,700 --> 00:11:32,387 Should he commit suicide or should he not? 290 00:11:32,387 --> 00:11:34,230 People will write in pleading with him. 291 00:11:34,230 --> 00:11:35,063 But no. 292 00:11:35,063 --> 00:11:35,896 No, sir. 293 00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:37,270 John Doe will remain adamant. 294 00:11:37,270 --> 00:11:40,287 On Christmas Eve, hot or cold, he goes. 295 00:11:40,287 --> 00:11:41,120 See? 296 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:44,430 - Very pretty. 297 00:11:44,430 --> 00:11:46,330 Very pretty indeed, Miss Mitchell. 298 00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:49,100 But would you mind telling me who goes on Christmas Eve? 299 00:11:49,100 --> 00:11:50,472 - John Doe. - What John Doe?. 300 00:11:50,472 --> 00:11:52,628 - The one we hire for the job, you lunkhead. 301 00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:53,939 - Wait a minute, wait a minute. 302 00:11:53,939 --> 00:11:56,260 Let me get this through this lame brain of mine. 303 00:11:56,260 --> 00:11:58,050 Are you suggesting we go out and hire someone 304 00:11:58,050 --> 00:11:59,680 to say he's gonna commit suicide on Christmas Eve? 305 00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:01,518 Is that it? - Why, you're catching on. 306 00:12:01,518 --> 00:12:03,210 - Who, for instance? - Anybody. 307 00:12:03,210 --> 00:12:04,370 Beany'll do. 308 00:12:04,370 --> 00:12:05,940 - Why, sure-- 309 00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:06,900 Who, me? 310 00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:08,030 Jump off a-- 311 00:12:08,030 --> 00:12:08,863 Oh, no. 312 00:12:08,863 --> 00:12:10,270 Any time but Christmas, I'm superstitious. 313 00:12:10,270 --> 00:12:13,146 (clanging) 314 00:12:13,146 --> 00:12:15,739 (sighing) 315 00:12:15,739 --> 00:12:16,727 - Miss Mitchell, do me a favor, will you? 316 00:12:16,727 --> 00:12:19,120 Go on out and get married and have a lotta babies, 317 00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:20,607 but stay outta newspaper business. 318 00:12:20,607 --> 00:12:23,410 - [Man] Better get that story in, Hank, it's getting late. 319 00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:24,790 - You're supposed to be a smart guy. 320 00:12:24,790 --> 00:12:26,110 If it was raining $100 bills, 321 00:12:26,110 --> 00:12:29,060 you'd be out looking for a dime you lost someplace. 322 00:12:29,060 --> 00:12:31,680 - Holy smokes, wasting my time listening to this mad woman. 323 00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:32,513 - [Ned] Look, Chief. 324 00:12:32,513 --> 00:12:33,870 Look what the Chronicle's running on John Doe. 325 00:12:33,870 --> 00:12:35,130 They say it's a fake. 326 00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,187 - Why, the no good-- 327 00:12:37,730 --> 00:12:40,430 John Doe story amateur journalism. 328 00:12:40,430 --> 00:12:41,340 It's palpably phony. 329 00:12:41,340 --> 00:12:43,860 It's a wonder anyone is taking it seriously. 330 00:12:43,860 --> 00:12:44,830 What do you think of those guys? 331 00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:46,180 - That's fine, that's fine. 332 00:12:46,180 --> 00:12:47,810 Now, fall right into their lap. 333 00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:49,790 Go ahead, say John Doe walked in 334 00:12:49,790 --> 00:12:50,880 and called the whole thing off. 335 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,310 You know what that's gonna sound like on top of this. 336 00:12:53,310 --> 00:12:54,379 - That's all, Ned, thank you. 337 00:12:54,379 --> 00:12:55,379 - All right. 338 00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:58,960 - Amateur journalism, huh? 339 00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:00,770 Why, that bunch of sophomores. 340 00:13:00,770 --> 00:13:02,330 I can teach them more about-- 341 00:13:02,330 --> 00:13:04,300 - Hey, boss, get a load of this. 342 00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:05,467 - What? - Look. 343 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:10,873 - [Henry] What do they want? 344 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,377 - [Beany] They all say they wrote the John Doe letter. 345 00:13:12,377 --> 00:13:14,010 (talking over each other) 346 00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:15,470 - Oh, they all wrote the letter. 347 00:13:15,470 --> 00:13:16,534 - Tell them all to wait. 348 00:13:16,534 --> 00:13:19,100 Look, Mr. Connell, one of those men is your John Doe. 349 00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:21,330 They're desperate and will do anything for a cup of coffee. 350 00:13:21,330 --> 00:13:24,530 Pick one out and you can make the chronicle eat their words. 351 00:13:24,530 --> 00:13:25,995 - I'm beginning to like this. 352 00:13:25,995 --> 00:13:29,040 - If you ask me, Hank, you're playing around with dynamite. 353 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:30,580 - No, no, no, no, no, the gal's right. 354 00:13:30,580 --> 00:13:32,550 We can't let the Chronicle get the laugh on us. 355 00:13:32,550 --> 00:13:34,340 We've gotta produce a John Doe now. 356 00:13:34,340 --> 00:13:36,130 Amateur journalism, huh? 357 00:13:36,130 --> 00:13:37,120 I'll show those guys. 358 00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:38,380 - Sure, and there's no reason 359 00:13:38,380 --> 00:13:39,940 for them to find out the truth either 360 00:13:39,940 --> 00:13:42,253 because, naturally, I won't say anything. 361 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:46,013 - Okay, sister, you get your job back. 362 00:13:46,013 --> 00:13:47,290 - Plus a bonus. 363 00:13:47,290 --> 00:13:48,123 - What bonus? 364 00:13:48,123 --> 00:13:50,670 - Oh, the bonus of $1,000 the Chronicle was going to pay me 365 00:13:50,670 --> 00:13:52,040 for this little document. 366 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:53,010 You'll find that it says that, 367 00:13:53,010 --> 00:13:54,460 I, Ann Mitchell, hereby certify 368 00:13:54,460 --> 00:13:56,278 that the John Doe letter was created by me-- 369 00:13:56,278 --> 00:13:57,660 - I can read, I can read. 370 00:13:57,660 --> 00:13:58,493 - Sorry. 371 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:02,067 - You think this is worth $1,000, do you? 372 00:14:02,067 --> 00:14:05,170 - Oh, the Chronicle would consider it dirt cheap. 373 00:14:05,170 --> 00:14:07,630 - Packs everything, including a gun. 374 00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:09,600 Okay, sister, you got yourself a deal. 375 00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:11,270 Now, let's take a look at the candidates. 376 00:14:11,270 --> 00:14:13,840 The one we pick has gotta be the typical average man, 377 00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:15,664 typical American that can keep his mouth shut. 378 00:14:15,664 --> 00:14:16,729 - Show me an American who can 379 00:14:16,729 --> 00:14:17,590 keep his mouth shut and I'll eat him. 380 00:14:20,945 --> 00:14:22,344 - Okay, Beany, bring 'em in one at a time. 381 00:14:22,344 --> 00:14:25,343 (angry chattering) 382 00:14:25,343 --> 00:14:28,926 (whimsical big band music) 383 00:15:26,453 --> 00:15:28,183 Did you write that letter to Miss Mitchell? 384 00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:30,208 - No, I didn't. 385 00:15:30,208 --> 00:15:32,466 - What are you doin' up here then? 386 00:15:32,466 --> 00:15:34,410 - Well, the paper said there were some jobs around loose. 387 00:15:34,410 --> 00:15:36,106 Thought there might be one left over. 388 00:15:36,106 --> 00:15:37,106 - Had any schooling? 389 00:15:38,060 --> 00:15:39,810 - Yeah, a little. 390 00:15:39,810 --> 00:15:41,640 - What do you do when you work? 391 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:43,190 - I used to pitch. - Baseball? 392 00:15:44,396 --> 00:15:46,650 - Yeah, till my wing went bad. 393 00:15:46,650 --> 00:15:47,600 - Where'd you play? 394 00:15:48,840 --> 00:15:50,500 - Bush leagues, mostly. 395 00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:52,570 - How about family, got any family? 396 00:15:52,570 --> 00:15:53,560 - No. 397 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,170 - Oh, just traveling through, huh? 398 00:15:55,170 --> 00:15:57,210 - Yep, me and a friend of mine. 399 00:15:57,210 --> 00:15:58,073 He's outside. 400 00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:03,593 - Looks all right. 401 00:16:03,593 --> 00:16:05,164 - He's perfect, a baseball player. 402 00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:06,978 What could be more American? 403 00:16:06,978 --> 00:16:07,962 - [Henry] Wish he had a family though. 404 00:16:07,962 --> 00:16:10,186 - [Man] Be less complicated without a family. 405 00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:12,000 - Look at that face, it's wonderful. 406 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:12,833 They'll believe him. 407 00:16:12,833 --> 00:16:16,040 Come on. 408 00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:17,000 - [Henry] What's your name? 409 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,740 - Willoughby, John Willoughby. 410 00:16:18,740 --> 00:16:21,140 Long John Willoughby they called me in baseball. 411 00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:24,433 - Would you like to make some money? 412 00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:28,770 - Yeah, maybe. 413 00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,070 - Would you be willing to say you wrote 414 00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:32,443 that letter and stick by it? 415 00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:38,483 - I get the idea. 416 00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:41,713 Yeah, maybe. 417 00:16:46,459 --> 00:16:47,840 - That's our man, he's made to order. 418 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:48,860 - [Henry] I don't know, 419 00:16:48,860 --> 00:16:49,880 he don't seem like the kind of a guy 420 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:50,836 that would fall in line. 421 00:16:50,836 --> 00:16:51,669 - When you're desperate for money, 422 00:16:51,669 --> 00:16:53,150 you do a lotta things, Mr. Connell. 423 00:16:53,150 --> 00:16:55,165 He's our man, I tell you. 424 00:16:55,165 --> 00:16:56,248 He's fainted! 425 00:16:57,090 --> 00:16:58,230 Get some water, quickly. 426 00:16:58,230 --> 00:16:59,910 - [Henry] Hurry up, Pop. 427 00:16:59,910 --> 00:17:00,743 Why don't you sit down? 428 00:17:00,743 --> 00:17:02,340 - Are you all right? 429 00:17:02,340 --> 00:17:03,733 - Yeah, I'm all right. 430 00:17:04,613 --> 00:17:06,083 - How many is that, six? 431 00:17:16,550 --> 00:17:18,227 Pretty hungry, weren't you? 432 00:17:19,787 --> 00:17:21,280 - [Man] Say all this John Doe 433 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:22,700 business is batty if you ask me. 434 00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:23,950 - Well, nobody asked you. 435 00:17:24,870 --> 00:17:27,550 - Trying to improve the world by jumping off buildings. 436 00:17:27,550 --> 00:17:28,383 You couldn't improve the world 437 00:17:28,383 --> 00:17:30,023 if the buildings jumped on you. 438 00:17:30,890 --> 00:17:32,160 - Don't mind the Colonel, he hates people. 439 00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,010 - [Ann] He likes you well enough to stick around. 440 00:17:35,010 --> 00:17:37,210 - Oh, that's 'cause we both play doohickeys. 441 00:17:38,780 --> 00:17:40,690 I met him in a boxcar a couple of years ago. 442 00:17:40,690 --> 00:17:41,800 I was fooling around with my harmonica, 443 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:43,950 and he comes over and joins in. 444 00:17:43,950 --> 00:17:45,900 I haven't been able to shake him since. 445 00:17:47,248 --> 00:17:50,081 (harmonica music) 446 00:17:51,685 --> 00:17:56,685 ("William Tell Overture" by Gioachino Rossini on harmonicas) 447 00:18:07,690 --> 00:18:08,610 - All right, boys, here he is. 448 00:18:08,610 --> 00:18:10,870 - No, no, no, you can't take pictures of him like that, 449 00:18:10,870 --> 00:18:12,733 eating a sandwich and with a beard. 450 00:18:12,733 --> 00:18:13,566 - But he's gonna jump off a building. 451 00:18:13,566 --> 00:18:15,220 - Yes, but not because he's out of a job. 452 00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:16,053 That's not news. 453 00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:18,410 This man's going to jump as a matter of principle. 454 00:18:18,410 --> 00:18:19,243 - Maybe you're right. - We'll clean him up 455 00:18:19,243 --> 00:18:20,720 and put him a hotel room, under bodyguards. 456 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:22,250 We'll make a mystery out of him. 457 00:18:22,250 --> 00:18:23,300 - Do you speak to Mr. Norton? 458 00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:24,160 - Thinks it's terrific. 459 00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:25,250 Says for us to go the limit. 460 00:18:25,250 --> 00:18:26,083 Wants us to build a bonfire 461 00:18:26,083 --> 00:18:27,995 under every big shot in the state. 462 00:18:27,995 --> 00:18:29,120 - Oh, swell, is that the contract? 463 00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:30,182 - Yes. 464 00:18:30,182 --> 00:18:31,786 What's he doing here? - Friend of his. 465 00:18:31,786 --> 00:18:33,592 They play duets together. 466 00:18:33,592 --> 00:18:34,425 - Duets? 467 00:18:34,425 --> 00:18:35,258 But can we trust him? 468 00:18:35,258 --> 00:18:36,800 - Oh. - I trust him. 469 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:37,810 - Oh, you trust him, eh? 470 00:18:37,810 --> 00:18:38,840 Well, that's fine. 471 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:39,910 I suppose he trusts you, too? 472 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:40,978 - [Ann] Oh, stop worrying. 473 00:18:40,978 --> 00:18:41,811 He's all right. 474 00:18:41,811 --> 00:18:43,120 - Well, okay, but we don't want more 475 00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:45,142 than a couple of hundred people in on this thing. 476 00:18:45,142 --> 00:18:47,160 Now, the first thing I want is an exact copy 477 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,170 of the John Doe letter in your own handwriting. 478 00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:50,904 - I got it all ready, here. 479 00:18:50,904 --> 00:18:52,650 - Now, that's fine. 480 00:18:52,650 --> 00:18:54,910 Now, I want you to sign this agreement. 481 00:18:54,910 --> 00:18:57,500 It gives us an exclusive story under your name 482 00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,663 day by day from now until Christmas. 483 00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:04,570 On December 26th you get one railroad ticket out of town, 484 00:19:04,570 --> 00:19:07,120 and the Bulletin agrees to pay to have your arm fixed. 485 00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:08,025 That's what you want, isn't it? 486 00:19:08,025 --> 00:19:09,890 - Yeah, but it's got to be by Bone-Setter Brown. 487 00:19:09,890 --> 00:19:11,750 - Okay, Bone-Setter Brown goes. 488 00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:12,980 Here, sign it. 489 00:19:12,980 --> 00:19:15,053 Meanwhile, here's $50 for spending money. 490 00:19:16,110 --> 00:19:17,050 That's fine. 491 00:19:17,050 --> 00:19:18,130 Beany? - Yes, boss? 492 00:19:18,130 --> 00:19:19,087 - Take charge of him. 493 00:19:19,087 --> 00:19:21,470 Get him a suite at the Imperial and hire some bodyguards. 494 00:19:21,470 --> 00:19:23,137 - Yeah, and some new clothes, Beany. 495 00:19:23,137 --> 00:19:24,630 - [Beany] Do you think we better have him deloused? 496 00:19:24,630 --> 00:19:25,760 - [Henry] Yeah, yeah, yeah. 497 00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:26,593 - [Beany] Both of 'em? 498 00:19:26,593 --> 00:19:27,426 - [Henry] Yes, both of 'em. 499 00:19:27,426 --> 00:19:28,800 But don't let 'em out of your sight. 500 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,170 - Hey, Beany, gray suit, huh? 501 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,003 - Yeah. 502 00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:31,836 - Okay, fellas. 503 00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:39,310 And you, start pounding that typewriter. 504 00:19:39,310 --> 00:19:40,970 Oh boy, this is terrific. 505 00:19:40,970 --> 00:19:42,290 No responsibilities on our part. 506 00:19:42,290 --> 00:19:43,580 Just statements from John Doe 507 00:19:43,580 --> 00:19:44,477 and we can blast our heads off. 508 00:19:44,477 --> 00:19:46,130 - Before you pop too many buttons, 509 00:19:46,130 --> 00:19:49,080 don't forget to make out that check for 1,000. 510 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:51,330 (groaning) 511 00:19:52,393 --> 00:19:54,250 - Okay fellas, now let me see. 512 00:19:54,250 --> 00:19:55,220 You sit outside the door. 513 00:19:55,220 --> 00:19:56,303 Nobody comes in, see. 514 00:19:56,303 --> 00:19:57,810 You two fellas sit in here. 515 00:19:57,810 --> 00:19:59,270 - Hey, pretty nifty, huh? 516 00:20:01,220 --> 00:20:02,690 - You ain't gonna get me to stay here. 517 00:20:02,690 --> 00:20:03,523 - [Beany] Sure you are. 518 00:20:03,523 --> 00:20:04,960 - No sir, that spot under the bridge 519 00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:07,870 where we slept last night's good enough for me. 520 00:20:07,870 --> 00:20:09,280 - Hey, what do I do with this baggage? 521 00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:10,113 - [Beany] Oh, stick 'em in the bedroom. 522 00:20:10,113 --> 00:20:11,490 - Give me mine, I ain't stayin'. 523 00:20:13,270 --> 00:20:15,180 You know, we were headed for the Columbia River country 524 00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:17,260 before all this John Doe business came up. 525 00:20:17,260 --> 00:20:18,400 You remember that, don't you? 526 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,760 - Sure, I remember. 527 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,499 - Say, did your ears pop coming up in the elevator? 528 00:20:21,499 --> 00:20:22,332 Mine did. 529 00:20:22,332 --> 00:20:23,754 - Oh, Long John, I tell ya, it's no good. 530 00:20:23,754 --> 00:20:24,987 You're gonna get used to a lotta stuff 531 00:20:24,987 --> 00:20:26,420 that's gonna wreck you. 532 00:20:26,420 --> 00:20:27,840 Why, that $50 in your pocket's 533 00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:29,046 beginning to show up on you already. 534 00:20:29,046 --> 00:20:29,879 (harmonica music) 535 00:20:29,879 --> 00:20:31,540 And don't pull that on me neither. 536 00:20:31,540 --> 00:20:32,373 - Stop worrying, Colonel. 537 00:20:32,373 --> 00:20:34,000 I'm gonna get my arm fixed outta this. 538 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,310 - Hey, here's some cigars the boss sent us. 539 00:20:36,310 --> 00:20:37,160 Have one. - Hey, cigars. 540 00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:38,310 - Help yourself. - No. 541 00:20:48,270 --> 00:20:49,650 - Hey, I'll bet ya even the Major Leaguers 542 00:20:49,650 --> 00:20:51,170 don't rate an outfit like this. 543 00:20:51,170 --> 00:20:52,490 - [Man] Here, make yourself comfortable. 544 00:20:52,490 --> 00:20:54,003 Paper? 545 00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:55,016 - No, I don't read no papers 546 00:20:55,016 --> 00:20:57,090 and I don't listen to radios either. 547 00:20:57,090 --> 00:20:59,030 I know the world's been shaved by a drunken barber 548 00:20:59,030 --> 00:21:00,430 and I don't have to read it. 549 00:21:03,515 --> 00:21:05,840 I've seen guys like you go under before. 550 00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:07,450 Guys that never had a worry, 551 00:21:07,450 --> 00:21:09,360 then they got ahold of some dough and went goofy. 552 00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:10,556 The first thing that happens to a guy-- 553 00:21:10,556 --> 00:21:11,950 - [Beany] Hey, did you get a load of the bedroom? 554 00:21:11,950 --> 00:21:12,783 - No. 555 00:21:13,790 --> 00:21:15,660 - The first thing that happens to a guy like that, 556 00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:17,037 he starts wanting to go into restaurants 557 00:21:17,037 --> 00:21:22,037 and sit down at a table and eat salads and cupcakes and tea. 558 00:21:22,140 --> 00:21:24,643 Boy, what that kinda food does to your system. 559 00:21:29,420 --> 00:21:31,730 The next thing the dope wants is a room. 560 00:21:31,730 --> 00:21:35,244 Yes sir, a room with steam heat, and curtains and rugs. 561 00:21:35,244 --> 00:21:36,557 And before you know it, he's all softened up 562 00:21:36,557 --> 00:21:39,350 and he can't sleep unless he has a bed. 563 00:21:39,350 --> 00:21:40,370 - Hey, stop worrying, Colonel. 564 00:21:40,370 --> 00:21:41,820 50 bucks ain't gonna ruin me. 565 00:21:41,820 --> 00:21:44,140 - I've seen plenty of fellas start out with 50 bucks 566 00:21:44,140 --> 00:21:45,750 and wind up with a bank account. 567 00:21:45,750 --> 00:21:47,610 - Hey, what's a matter with a bank account anyway? 568 00:21:47,610 --> 00:21:49,380 - You let me tell you, Long John, 569 00:21:49,380 --> 00:21:53,100 when you become a guy with a bank account, they gotcha. 570 00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:54,687 Yes sir, they gotcha. 571 00:21:56,340 --> 00:21:57,173 - Who's got him? 572 00:21:57,173 --> 00:21:58,443 - The heelots. 573 00:21:58,443 --> 00:21:59,276 - Who? 574 00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:01,050 - Hey, there's the City Hall tower 575 00:22:01,050 --> 00:22:02,373 I'm supposed to jump off of. 576 00:22:02,373 --> 00:22:04,150 It's even higher than this. 577 00:22:04,150 --> 00:22:05,237 - Who's got him? 578 00:22:05,237 --> 00:22:06,959 - The heelots. 579 00:22:06,959 --> 00:22:08,390 - [John Doe] Woo. 580 00:22:08,390 --> 00:22:10,390 - Hey, wait a minute. 581 00:22:10,390 --> 00:22:11,953 You're not supposed to jump till Christmas Eve. 582 00:22:11,953 --> 00:22:14,088 Do you wanna get me in a jam?. 583 00:22:14,088 --> 00:22:16,210 - If it's gonna get you in a jam, I'll do you a favor. 584 00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:17,043 I won't jump. 585 00:22:18,790 --> 00:22:20,013 - And when they got you, 586 00:22:20,013 --> 00:22:22,530 you got no more chance than a road rabbit. 587 00:22:22,530 --> 00:22:24,232 - Hey, who'd you say was gonna get him? 588 00:22:24,232 --> 00:22:25,170 - Say, is this one of those places 589 00:22:25,170 --> 00:22:26,460 where you ring if you want something? 590 00:22:26,460 --> 00:22:28,500 - Yeah, yeah, just use the phone. 591 00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:30,260 - Boy, I've always wanted to do this. 592 00:22:30,260 --> 00:22:31,470 - Hey, Doc, look. 593 00:22:31,470 --> 00:22:32,303 Look, Doc. 594 00:22:33,170 --> 00:22:35,040 Gimme that again, will ya? 595 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:36,403 Who's gonna get him? 596 00:22:36,403 --> 00:22:38,260 - The heelots. 597 00:22:38,260 --> 00:22:39,700 - Who are they? 598 00:22:39,700 --> 00:22:41,340 - Listen, sucker, you ever been broke? 599 00:22:41,340 --> 00:22:43,267 - Sure, mostly often. - All right. 600 00:22:43,267 --> 00:22:46,100 You're walking along, not a nickel in your jeans, 601 00:22:46,100 --> 00:22:47,930 you're free as the wind, nobody bothers you. 602 00:22:47,930 --> 00:22:50,390 Hundreds of people pass you by in every line of business, 603 00:22:50,390 --> 00:22:53,293 shoes, hats, automobiles, radios, furniture, everything. 604 00:22:53,293 --> 00:22:55,980 They're all nice lovable people and they let you alone. 605 00:22:55,980 --> 00:22:57,393 Is that right? 606 00:22:58,536 --> 00:23:01,036 Then you get ahold of some dough and what happens? 607 00:23:01,990 --> 00:23:06,010 All those nice, sweet, lovable people become heelots. 608 00:23:06,010 --> 00:23:07,463 A lotta heels. 609 00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:12,646 They begin creeping up on you, trying to sell you something. 610 00:23:12,646 --> 00:23:16,247 They got long claws and they get a stranglehold on you. 611 00:23:16,247 --> 00:23:18,460 And you squirm and you duck and you holler 612 00:23:18,460 --> 00:23:19,390 and you try to push 'em away, 613 00:23:19,390 --> 00:23:21,910 but you haven't got a chance, they've got you. 614 00:23:21,910 --> 00:23:23,870 First thing you know, you own things. 615 00:23:23,870 --> 00:23:25,730 A car, for instance. 616 00:23:25,730 --> 00:23:27,100 Now your whole life is messed up 617 00:23:27,100 --> 00:23:28,780 with a lot more stuff. 618 00:23:28,780 --> 00:23:31,530 You got license fees and number plates 619 00:23:31,530 --> 00:23:34,910 and gas and oil and taxes and insurance 620 00:23:34,910 --> 00:23:37,150 and identification cards and letters 621 00:23:37,150 --> 00:23:39,970 and bills and flat tires and dents and traffic tickets 622 00:23:39,970 --> 00:23:43,140 and motorcycle cops and courtrooms and lawyers and fines 623 00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:45,938 and a-million-and-one other things. 624 00:23:45,938 --> 00:23:46,838 Then what happens? 625 00:23:48,500 --> 00:23:51,240 You're not the free and happy guy you used to be. 626 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:54,100 You gotta have money to pay for all those things. 627 00:23:54,100 --> 00:23:56,990 So, you go after what the other fella's got. 628 00:23:56,990 --> 00:23:59,863 And there you are, you're a heelot yourself. 629 00:24:07,530 --> 00:24:09,433 - You win, Colonel, here, take the 50. 630 00:24:10,972 --> 00:24:11,920 Go out and get rid of it. 631 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,305 - You bet I will, just as fast as I can. 632 00:24:14,305 --> 00:24:16,310 I'm gonna get some canned goods, a fishing rod, 633 00:24:16,310 --> 00:24:18,620 and the rest I'm gonna give away. 634 00:24:18,620 --> 00:24:20,030 - Give away? 635 00:24:20,030 --> 00:24:21,570 - Hey, get me a pitcher's glove. 636 00:24:21,570 --> 00:24:23,820 I gotta get me some practice. 637 00:24:23,820 --> 00:24:26,260 - Say, he's giving it away, I'm gonna get me some of that. 638 00:24:26,260 --> 00:24:28,147 - Hey, come back here, you heelot. 639 00:24:30,863 --> 00:24:34,840 - Will you send up five hamburgers with all the trimmings, 640 00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,620 five chocolate ice cream sodas, 641 00:24:37,620 --> 00:24:39,070 and five pieces of apple pie? 642 00:24:39,990 --> 00:24:41,893 No, apple, with cheese. 643 00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:43,980 Yeah, thanks. 644 00:24:57,790 --> 00:24:58,643 - Hello there. 645 00:25:01,304 --> 00:25:05,170 Well, if it isn't the man about town. 646 00:25:05,170 --> 00:25:06,130 - All set, Miss Ann? 647 00:25:06,130 --> 00:25:06,963 - Hmm? 648 00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:10,503 Oh, oh yes, let's go. 649 00:25:11,850 --> 00:25:13,720 Let's see, we want some action in these pictures. 650 00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:14,913 - Action? - Mm-hmm. 651 00:25:17,476 --> 00:25:18,450 - That's good. - No, no, no. 652 00:25:18,450 --> 00:25:20,780 This man's going to jump off a roof. 653 00:25:20,780 --> 00:25:23,090 Here, wait a minute, let me comb your hair. 654 00:25:23,090 --> 00:25:23,923 Sit down. 655 00:25:28,330 --> 00:25:29,823 There, that's better. 656 00:25:37,297 --> 00:25:39,670 You know, he's got a nice face, hasn't he? 657 00:25:39,670 --> 00:25:42,994 - Yeah, he's pretty. (laughing) 658 00:25:42,994 --> 00:25:44,250 - Here, sit down. 659 00:25:44,250 --> 00:25:45,373 Quiet, egghead. 660 00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:48,160 All right, now a serious expression. 661 00:25:49,060 --> 00:25:49,893 - I can't, I'm feeling too good. 662 00:25:49,893 --> 00:25:51,490 - [Ann] Oh, come on now, this is serious. 663 00:25:51,490 --> 00:25:54,230 You're a man disgusted with all of civilization. 664 00:25:54,230 --> 00:25:55,080 - With all of it? 665 00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:57,830 - [Ann] Yes, you're sore at the world, come on now. 666 00:25:57,830 --> 00:25:59,380 - Oh, crabby guy, huh? - Yeah. 667 00:26:02,430 --> 00:26:03,263 No, no. 668 00:26:05,788 --> 00:26:09,330 No. (laughing) 669 00:26:09,330 --> 00:26:10,320 No, look. 670 00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:12,508 You don't have to smell the world. 671 00:26:12,508 --> 00:26:14,424 (laughing) 672 00:26:14,424 --> 00:26:15,360 - With all those guys in the bleachers think-- 673 00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:16,620 - Nevermind those guys. 674 00:26:16,620 --> 00:26:18,080 All right, stand up. 675 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,970 Now, let's see what you look like when you protest. 676 00:26:20,970 --> 00:26:21,950 - Against what? 677 00:26:21,950 --> 00:26:23,733 - [Ann] Against anything, just protest. 678 00:26:25,450 --> 00:26:26,557 - You got me. 679 00:26:26,557 --> 00:26:28,520 - Oh, look, I'm the umpire 680 00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,910 and you just cut the heart of the plate with your fast one 681 00:26:30,910 --> 00:26:31,760 and I called it a ball. 682 00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:33,130 What would you do? 683 00:26:33,130 --> 00:26:34,090 - Oh you did, huh? 684 00:26:34,090 --> 00:26:35,040 - [Ann] Yeah. 685 00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:37,057 - Why can't you call 'em right, you boneheaded big-eared-- 686 00:26:37,057 --> 00:26:39,808 - [Ann] Grab it, Eddie, grab it. 687 00:26:39,808 --> 00:26:42,558 (big band music) 688 00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:48,729 - [Newspaper Man] Extra, extra! 689 00:27:01,410 --> 00:27:02,796 (chattering) 690 00:27:02,796 --> 00:27:03,629 Extra. 691 00:27:04,901 --> 00:27:05,984 Extra, extra! 692 00:27:24,103 --> 00:27:26,520 (chattering) 693 00:27:31,710 --> 00:27:34,390 - I don't care whose picture they're publishing. 694 00:27:34,390 --> 00:27:37,650 I still say that this John Doe person is a myth, 695 00:27:37,650 --> 00:27:39,850 and you can quote me on that. 696 00:27:39,850 --> 00:27:40,810 And I'm going to insist 697 00:27:40,810 --> 00:27:43,200 on his being produced for questioning. 698 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,990 You know as well as I do that this whole thing 699 00:27:45,990 --> 00:27:48,740 is being engineered by a vicious man 700 00:27:48,740 --> 00:27:52,741 with a vicious purpose, Mr. D.B. Norton. 701 00:27:52,741 --> 00:27:54,513 (whistle blowing) 702 00:27:54,513 --> 00:27:57,346 (engines revving) 703 00:28:05,363 --> 00:28:08,196 (whistle blowing) 704 00:28:15,496 --> 00:28:17,170 - Mr. Connell and Miss Mitchell are at the house, sir. 705 00:28:17,170 --> 00:28:18,180 - Oh, they are? 706 00:28:18,180 --> 00:28:19,413 All right, come on. 707 00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:22,540 - Personally, I think it's just 708 00:28:22,540 --> 00:28:23,900 plain stupidity to drop it now. 709 00:28:23,900 --> 00:28:25,497 You should see his fan mail, thousands. 710 00:28:25,497 --> 00:28:27,990 Why, it's going over like a house afire. 711 00:28:27,990 --> 00:28:29,470 - What are you afraid of, Connell? 712 00:28:29,470 --> 00:28:30,900 It's doubled our circulation. 713 00:28:30,900 --> 00:28:32,530 - Yeah, but it's got everybody sore. 714 00:28:32,530 --> 00:28:33,740 Ads are being pulled. 715 00:28:33,740 --> 00:28:35,300 The governor's starting a libel suit. 716 00:28:35,300 --> 00:28:37,253 What's more, they all know John Doe's a phony, 717 00:28:37,253 --> 00:28:38,440 and they insist on seeing him. - Well, what about it? 718 00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:39,293 Let them see him. 719 00:28:39,293 --> 00:28:40,996 We'll go 'em one better, they can also hear him. 720 00:28:40,996 --> 00:28:41,829 You own a radio station, Mr. Norton. 721 00:28:41,829 --> 00:28:42,770 Why not put him on the air? 722 00:28:42,770 --> 00:28:44,293 - Watch out for this dame, D.B., she'll drive you batty. 723 00:28:44,293 --> 00:28:45,760 - Oh-- - Look, we can't let 'em 724 00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,710 get to this bush-league pitcher and start pumping him. 725 00:28:47,710 --> 00:28:48,620 Good night. 726 00:28:48,620 --> 00:28:50,700 No telling what that screwball might do. 727 00:28:50,700 --> 00:28:52,220 I walked in yesterday, here he is, 728 00:28:52,220 --> 00:28:55,510 standing on a table with a fishing pole, fly-casting. 729 00:28:55,510 --> 00:28:56,900 Take my advice and get him outta town 730 00:28:56,900 --> 00:28:57,733 before this thing explodes in our faces. 731 00:28:57,733 --> 00:28:58,840 - If you do, Mr. Norton, 732 00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:00,680 you're just as much of a dumb cluck as he is. 733 00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:01,513 Excuse me. 734 00:29:01,513 --> 00:29:02,346 - No, you've got yourself a meal ticket 735 00:29:02,346 --> 00:29:03,179 and you hate to let go. 736 00:29:03,179 --> 00:29:04,330 - Sure, it's a meal ticket for me, I admit it. 737 00:29:04,330 --> 00:29:06,370 But it's also a windfall for somebody like Mr. Norton 738 00:29:06,370 --> 00:29:08,130 who's trying to crash national politics. 739 00:29:08,130 --> 00:29:09,610 That's what you bought the newspaper for, isn't it? 740 00:29:09,610 --> 00:29:11,140 You wanna reach a lotta people, don't you? 741 00:29:11,140 --> 00:29:12,260 Well, put John Doe on the air 742 00:29:12,260 --> 00:29:14,025 and you can reach 130 million of 'em. 743 00:29:14,025 --> 00:29:16,250 He can say anything he wants and they'll listen to him. 744 00:29:16,250 --> 00:29:17,990 All right, we'll forget the Governor and the Mayor 745 00:29:17,990 --> 00:29:19,560 and all the small fry like that. 746 00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:21,170 This can arouse national interest. 747 00:29:21,170 --> 00:29:22,003 If he made a hit around here, 748 00:29:22,003 --> 00:29:24,350 he can do it everyplace else in the country. 749 00:29:24,350 --> 00:29:27,100 And you'll be pulling the strings, Mr. Norton. 750 00:29:29,978 --> 00:29:32,038 - Go down to the office and arrange for some radio time. 751 00:29:32,038 --> 00:29:32,871 - Why, D.B., you're not gonna fall-- 752 00:29:32,871 --> 00:29:35,538 - I want it as soon as possible. 753 00:29:37,970 --> 00:29:38,830 - Okay. 754 00:29:38,830 --> 00:29:41,160 I just came in to get warm, myself. 755 00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:42,113 Come on, let's go. 756 00:29:43,070 --> 00:29:44,200 - Don't you go. 757 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:45,200 I wanna talk to you. 758 00:29:52,140 --> 00:29:52,973 Sit down. 759 00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:13,672 Hey, this John Doe idea was yours, huh? 760 00:30:13,672 --> 00:30:14,505 - Yes sir. 761 00:30:20,947 --> 00:30:22,545 - How much money do you get? 762 00:30:22,545 --> 00:30:23,378 - $30. 763 00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:25,153 - $30. 764 00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:28,240 Well then, what are you after? 765 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:31,459 I mean what do you want, a journalistic career? 766 00:30:31,459 --> 00:30:32,292 - Money. 767 00:30:33,310 --> 00:30:34,221 - Money. 768 00:30:34,221 --> 00:30:36,473 Well, I'm glad to hear somebody admit it. 769 00:30:39,759 --> 00:30:42,472 Do you suppose you could write a radio speech 770 00:30:42,472 --> 00:30:44,185 that would put that fellow over? 771 00:30:44,185 --> 00:30:45,018 - [Ann] Oh, I'm sure I can. 772 00:30:45,018 --> 00:30:47,367 - Do it, and I'll give you $100 a week. 773 00:30:47,367 --> 00:30:48,200 - $100-- 774 00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:49,820 - That's only the beginning. 775 00:30:49,820 --> 00:30:50,653 You play your cards right 776 00:30:50,653 --> 00:30:53,630 and you'll never have to worry about money again. 777 00:30:53,630 --> 00:30:54,617 Oh, I knew it. 778 00:30:54,617 --> 00:30:55,590 - Hello. - Hello. 779 00:30:55,590 --> 00:30:57,980 Whenever there's a pretty woman around-- 780 00:30:57,980 --> 00:30:59,980 This is my nephew, Ted Sheldon, Miss Mitchell. 781 00:30:59,980 --> 00:31:01,260 - How do you do? - How do you do? 782 00:31:01,260 --> 00:31:02,740 - All right, Casanova, I'll give you a break. 783 00:31:02,740 --> 00:31:05,410 See that Miss Mitchell gets a car to take her home. 784 00:31:05,410 --> 00:31:07,860 - Always reading my mind, aren't you? 785 00:31:07,860 --> 00:31:09,633 - Thank you very much for everything. 786 00:31:10,561 --> 00:31:12,410 - And, Miss Mitchell, 787 00:31:12,410 --> 00:31:15,540 I think from now on you'd better work directly with me. 788 00:31:15,540 --> 00:31:16,373 - Yes, sir. 789 00:31:25,653 --> 00:31:30,653 (upbeat orchestral music) (typewriter keys clacking) 790 00:31:37,485 --> 00:31:40,113 (groaning) 791 00:31:40,113 --> 00:31:43,030 (orchestral music) 792 00:31:50,638 --> 00:31:51,471 Hey! 793 00:31:52,539 --> 00:31:53,641 I thought you were asleep. 794 00:31:53,641 --> 00:31:54,474 - [Girl] We just wanted to say good night. 795 00:31:54,474 --> 00:31:55,457 - [Girl] Goodnight sis. 796 00:31:55,457 --> 00:31:56,299 (groaning) 797 00:31:56,299 --> 00:31:58,556 - Oh, you little brats, you're just stalling. 798 00:31:58,556 --> 00:31:59,973 I said goodnight. 799 00:32:00,900 --> 00:32:01,960 - Come, come, come, children. 800 00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:03,066 It's past your bedtime. 801 00:32:03,066 --> 00:32:04,587 Go on, go on. (children fussing) 802 00:32:04,587 --> 00:32:07,586 - Come on, pooch, come on. - Come on, come on. 803 00:32:07,586 --> 00:32:08,419 - [Woman] Now scooch off to bed. 804 00:32:08,419 --> 00:32:10,070 - Stick a fork through me, I'm done. 805 00:32:10,070 --> 00:32:11,570 I'll never get this speech right. 806 00:32:11,570 --> 00:32:13,020 - Oh, yes you will, Ann, dear. 807 00:32:13,020 --> 00:32:14,323 You're very clever. 808 00:32:14,323 --> 00:32:15,630 - Yeah, I know. 809 00:32:15,630 --> 00:32:16,738 What are you looking for? 810 00:32:16,738 --> 00:32:18,900 - Your purse, I need $10. - What for? 811 00:32:18,900 --> 00:32:20,880 I gave you $50 just the other day. 812 00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:23,320 - Yes, I know, dear, but Mrs. Burke had her baby yesterday. 813 00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:24,831 Nine pounds. 814 00:32:24,831 --> 00:32:26,610 And there wasn't a thing in the house. 815 00:32:26,610 --> 00:32:28,069 And then the Community Chest lady came-- 816 00:32:28,069 --> 00:32:29,439 - And 50's all gone, huh? 817 00:32:29,439 --> 00:32:30,740 Who is the 10 for? 818 00:32:30,740 --> 00:32:32,160 - The Websters. - The Websters. 819 00:32:32,160 --> 00:32:33,410 - You remember, those lovely people 820 00:32:33,410 --> 00:32:35,160 your father used to take care of? 821 00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:37,240 I thought I'd buy them some groceries. 822 00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:39,090 Oh, Ann, dear, it's a shame, those poor-- 823 00:32:39,090 --> 00:32:40,140 - You're marvelous, Ma. 824 00:32:40,140 --> 00:32:41,800 You're just like Father used to be. 825 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:43,430 Do you realize a couple of weeks ago 826 00:32:43,430 --> 00:32:45,130 we didn't have enough to eat ourselves? 827 00:32:45,130 --> 00:32:48,260 - Well, yes, I know, dear, but these people are in such need 828 00:32:48,260 --> 00:32:49,120 and we have plenty now. 829 00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:50,710 - If you're thinking of that $1,000, forget it. 830 00:32:50,710 --> 00:32:51,830 It's practically all gone. 831 00:32:51,830 --> 00:32:53,080 We owed everybody in town. 832 00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:55,880 Now, you just gotta stop giving all your money away. 833 00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:57,420 - Oh, Ann, dear. 834 00:32:57,420 --> 00:32:58,830 - Oh, I'm sorry, Ma. 835 00:32:58,830 --> 00:33:00,570 Oh, don't pay any attention to me. 836 00:33:00,570 --> 00:33:02,673 I guess I'm just upset about all this. 837 00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:04,470 Gee whiz, here I am with 838 00:33:04,470 --> 00:33:05,690 a great opportunity to get somewhere, 839 00:33:05,690 --> 00:33:08,380 to give us security for once in our lives, and I'm stuck. 840 00:33:08,380 --> 00:33:11,727 If I can put this over, your Mrs. Burke can have six babies. 841 00:33:11,727 --> 00:33:13,084 - You mean the speech you're writing? 842 00:33:13,084 --> 00:33:16,400 - Yeah, I don't know, I simply can't get it to gel. 843 00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:17,440 I created somebody who was going 844 00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:18,870 to give up his life for a principle. 845 00:33:18,870 --> 00:33:19,734 Hundreds of thousands of people 846 00:33:19,734 --> 00:33:21,560 are gonna listen to him over the radio. 847 00:33:21,560 --> 00:33:23,540 And unless he says something that's, 848 00:33:23,540 --> 00:33:26,020 well, that's sensational, it's just no good. 849 00:33:26,020 --> 00:33:27,580 - Well, honey, of course I don't know 850 00:33:27,580 --> 00:33:29,770 what kind of a speech you're trying to write, 851 00:33:29,770 --> 00:33:32,050 but judging from the samples I've read, 852 00:33:32,050 --> 00:33:33,780 I don't think anybody'll listen. 853 00:33:33,780 --> 00:33:35,240 - What? 854 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:38,830 - Darling, there are so many complaining political speeches. 855 00:33:38,830 --> 00:33:39,890 People are tired of hearing 856 00:33:39,890 --> 00:33:42,050 nothing but doom and despair on the radio. 857 00:33:42,050 --> 00:33:43,910 If you're gonna have him say anything, 858 00:33:43,910 --> 00:33:46,780 why don't you let him say something simple and real, 859 00:33:46,780 --> 00:33:48,080 something with hope in it? 860 00:33:49,742 --> 00:33:52,478 If your father were alive, he'd know what to say. 861 00:33:52,478 --> 00:33:53,311 - Oh, yes. 862 00:33:54,493 --> 00:33:57,527 Father certainly would. 863 00:33:57,527 --> 00:34:02,527 - Wait a minute. - Hmm? 864 00:34:15,854 --> 00:34:17,756 - That's your father's diary, Ann. 865 00:34:17,756 --> 00:34:18,795 - Father's-- 866 00:34:18,795 --> 00:34:21,058 I never knew he had a diary. 867 00:34:21,058 --> 00:34:23,310 - There's enough in it for a 100 speeches, 868 00:34:23,310 --> 00:34:25,960 things people ought to hear nowadays. 869 00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:28,200 You'll be careful of it, won't you, dear? 870 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,707 Always helped to keep your father alive for me. 871 00:34:30,707 --> 00:34:33,276 - You bet I will, Ma. 872 00:34:33,276 --> 00:34:34,937 (angry chattering) 873 00:34:34,937 --> 00:34:38,410 - Wait a minute, John Doe don't wanna sign no autographs. 874 00:34:38,410 --> 00:34:39,580 - Well, what does he do all day? 875 00:34:39,580 --> 00:34:41,300 - What does he do all day? 876 00:34:41,300 --> 00:34:42,960 He's writing out his memories. 877 00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:44,140 (angry chattering) 878 00:34:44,140 --> 00:34:45,780 - Sorry, lady, you can't see Mr. Doe. 879 00:34:45,780 --> 00:34:47,250 He wants to be alone. 880 00:34:47,250 --> 00:34:48,450 No. 881 00:34:48,450 --> 00:34:51,350 No, he just sits around all day and commutes with himself. 882 00:34:54,550 --> 00:34:57,293 ("Take Me Out to the Ballgame") 883 00:34:57,293 --> 00:34:58,126 Ball. 884 00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:09,368 - I don't know how you're gonna stand it 885 00:35:09,368 --> 00:35:11,018 around here till after Christmas. 886 00:35:15,240 --> 00:35:17,923 I'll bet you ain't heard a train whistle in two weeks. 887 00:35:25,527 --> 00:35:26,360 - Strike. 888 00:35:40,413 --> 00:35:42,163 - I know why you're hanging around. 889 00:35:49,310 --> 00:35:50,743 You're stuck on the girl. 890 00:35:53,727 --> 00:35:56,527 That's all a guy needs is to get hooked up with a woman. 891 00:36:14,490 --> 00:36:16,510 - What was that, a single? 892 00:36:16,510 --> 00:36:18,638 - First baseman dropped the ball. 893 00:36:18,638 --> 00:36:20,610 - Butterfingers. 894 00:36:20,610 --> 00:36:21,603 Tough luck, pal. 895 00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:30,250 - A guy has a woman on his hands, first thing he knows, 896 00:36:30,250 --> 00:36:33,388 his life is balled up with a lot more things. 897 00:36:33,388 --> 00:36:34,221 Furniture. 898 00:36:45,977 --> 00:36:46,963 - Did you get him? 899 00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:49,420 - You're out. 900 00:36:49,420 --> 00:36:50,830 - Swell. 901 00:36:50,830 --> 00:36:51,710 What's this, the end of the eighth? 902 00:36:51,710 --> 00:36:52,543 - [John] Ninth. 903 00:36:57,510 --> 00:36:59,290 - Hey, Beany, there's a couple of lugs from the Chronicle 904 00:36:59,290 --> 00:37:00,459 snooping around out here. 905 00:37:00,459 --> 00:37:01,292 - Ah. 906 00:37:04,460 --> 00:37:05,880 Come on, Angelface. 907 00:37:07,790 --> 00:37:09,020 Gangway. 908 00:37:09,020 --> 00:37:11,233 - What's the score, Angelface? - Three to two, our favor. 909 00:37:11,233 --> 00:37:12,900 - Gee, that's great. 910 00:37:19,213 --> 00:37:20,820 - Hey, you got swell form there. 911 00:37:20,820 --> 00:37:22,580 Must've been a pretty good pitcher. 912 00:37:22,580 --> 00:37:23,430 - Pretty good, yeah. 913 00:37:23,430 --> 00:37:24,700 I was just about ready for the Major Leagues 914 00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:26,550 when I chipped a bone in my elbow. 915 00:37:26,550 --> 00:37:28,650 I got it pitching a 19 inning game. 916 00:37:28,650 --> 00:37:29,700 - 19? 917 00:37:29,700 --> 00:37:30,540 - Yep. 918 00:37:30,540 --> 00:37:32,467 There was a Major League scout there watching me, too. 919 00:37:32,467 --> 00:37:34,867 And he came down after the game with a contract. 920 00:37:35,701 --> 00:37:36,840 But you know what? 921 00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,540 I couldn't lift my arm to sign it. 922 00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:41,620 I'll be okay though as soon as I get it fixed up. 923 00:37:41,620 --> 00:37:42,470 - That's too bad. 924 00:37:43,870 --> 00:37:45,003 - What do you mean, too bad? 925 00:37:45,003 --> 00:37:46,100 - Huh? 926 00:37:46,100 --> 00:37:48,640 Oh, that you'll never be able to play again. 927 00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:49,523 - What are you talking about? 928 00:37:49,523 --> 00:37:50,356 I just told you I was gonna get my-- 929 00:37:50,356 --> 00:37:52,150 - [Man] Well, you know how they are in baseball 930 00:37:52,150 --> 00:37:53,750 if a guy's mixed up in a racket. 931 00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:56,210 - Racket, what do you mean? 932 00:37:56,210 --> 00:37:59,563 - Well, I was just thinking about this John Doe business. 933 00:37:59,563 --> 00:38:02,350 Why, as soon as it comes out it's all a fake, 934 00:38:02,350 --> 00:38:04,500 you'll be washed up in baseball, won't you? 935 00:38:07,060 --> 00:38:07,893 - Yeah. 936 00:38:11,036 --> 00:38:13,464 Doggone, I never thought about that. 937 00:38:13,464 --> 00:38:18,464 ("Funeral March" by Frederic Chopin on harmonica) 938 00:38:19,102 --> 00:38:19,935 Gosh. 939 00:38:19,935 --> 00:38:22,202 - And another thing, what about all the kids in the country, 940 00:38:22,202 --> 00:38:24,563 the kids that idolize ballplayers? 941 00:38:24,563 --> 00:38:27,859 What are they gonna think about you? 942 00:38:27,859 --> 00:38:28,692 - Yeah. 943 00:38:29,610 --> 00:38:30,739 Hey, Colonel. 944 00:38:30,739 --> 00:38:33,680 (harmonica music) 945 00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:35,130 Did you hear that? 946 00:38:35,130 --> 00:38:37,840 I got to figure some way out of this thing. 947 00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:39,540 - The elevators are still running. 948 00:38:41,090 --> 00:38:43,080 - I know one way you can do it. 949 00:38:43,080 --> 00:38:44,610 - How? 950 00:38:44,610 --> 00:38:46,090 - Well, when you get up there on the radio, 951 00:38:46,090 --> 00:38:48,770 all you have to do is say the whole thing's a frame up. 952 00:38:48,770 --> 00:38:50,763 Make you a hero, sure as you're born. 953 00:38:52,180 --> 00:38:54,830 - Yeah, but how am I going to get my arm fixed? 954 00:38:54,830 --> 00:38:55,683 - That's a cinch. 955 00:38:56,690 --> 00:38:58,810 I know somebody who'll give you $5,000 956 00:38:58,810 --> 00:39:00,647 just to get up on the radio and tell the truth. 957 00:39:00,647 --> 00:39:02,320 - $5,000? 958 00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:04,500 - Yeah, $5,000 and he gets it right away. 959 00:39:04,500 --> 00:39:07,100 You don't have to wait till Christmas. 960 00:39:07,100 --> 00:39:09,763 - Look out, Long John, they're closing in on you. 961 00:39:11,390 --> 00:39:13,860 - Say, who's putting up this dough? 962 00:39:13,860 --> 00:39:15,210 - Fella runs the Chronicle. 963 00:39:17,590 --> 00:39:21,907 Here's the speech you make and it's all written for you. 964 00:39:21,907 --> 00:39:23,253 - $5,000. 965 00:39:26,376 --> 00:39:27,483 - [Man] It's on the level. 966 00:39:29,359 --> 00:39:32,859 (upbeat orchestral music) 967 00:39:38,476 --> 00:39:41,850 - No, I'm sorry, tickets for the broadcast are all gone. 968 00:39:41,850 --> 00:39:43,030 Phone the Bulletin. 969 00:39:43,030 --> 00:39:44,785 - Sorry, no more tickets left. 970 00:39:44,785 --> 00:39:47,202 (chattering) 971 00:39:54,757 --> 00:39:56,350 - Here he is. 972 00:39:56,350 --> 00:39:58,670 - [Ann] Hello John, all set for the big night? 973 00:39:58,670 --> 00:39:59,503 Swell. 974 00:39:59,503 --> 00:40:00,612 - Turn around. - One moment. 975 00:40:00,612 --> 00:40:02,157 - Now stand still. - Hold it, Mr. Doe. 976 00:40:02,157 --> 00:40:03,326 Big smile, Mr. Doe. 977 00:40:03,326 --> 00:40:04,159 Ah that's swell. 978 00:40:04,159 --> 00:40:04,992 - Okay, Beany, that's all, take them out will you? 979 00:40:04,992 --> 00:40:05,967 - Alright, scram now. - Come on. 980 00:40:05,967 --> 00:40:08,034 Can't I get another picture? 981 00:40:08,034 --> 00:40:09,290 - Now look John, here's the speech. 982 00:40:09,290 --> 00:40:10,460 It's in caps and double spaced. 983 00:40:10,460 --> 00:40:11,930 You won't have no trouble reading it. 984 00:40:11,930 --> 00:40:12,990 Not nervous, are you? - No. 985 00:40:12,990 --> 00:40:14,853 - Of course not, he wouldn't be. 986 00:40:14,853 --> 00:40:16,870 - Who? - John Doe, the one in there. 987 00:40:16,870 --> 00:40:17,950 - Hey don't let your knees rattle. 988 00:40:17,950 --> 00:40:18,783 It picks up on the mic. 989 00:40:18,783 --> 00:40:19,900 - Oh Beany. 990 00:40:19,900 --> 00:40:21,130 You needn't be nervous, John 991 00:40:21,130 --> 00:40:23,120 All you have to remember to be sincere. 992 00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:24,450 - Pick up that phone Miss Mitchell it's for you. 993 00:40:24,450 --> 00:40:25,370 - [Ann] Okay. 994 00:40:25,370 --> 00:40:26,203 Hello? 995 00:40:26,203 --> 00:40:27,220 Yes, mother. 996 00:40:27,220 --> 00:40:28,327 - Oh, thank you, darling. 997 00:40:28,327 --> 00:40:30,794 Oh, there he is, the poor dear man. 998 00:40:30,794 --> 00:40:33,201 Oh good luck to you, Mr. Doe. 999 00:40:33,201 --> 00:40:35,732 We want you to know that we're are all for you. 1000 00:40:35,732 --> 00:40:37,497 The girls all decided that 1001 00:40:37,497 --> 00:40:41,017 you're not to jump off any roof at all. 1002 00:40:41,017 --> 00:40:42,384 (chattering) 1003 00:40:42,384 --> 00:40:43,964 - You got the speech I gave you? 1004 00:40:43,964 --> 00:40:44,797 - Yeah. 1005 00:40:46,058 --> 00:40:48,363 - Now look, I'll give the money to the Colonel 1006 00:40:48,363 --> 00:40:50,180 just as soon as you get started. 1007 00:40:50,180 --> 00:40:52,130 We'll have a car waiting at the side entrance for you. 1008 00:40:52,130 --> 00:40:53,637 - Okay. - How'd you get in here? 1009 00:40:53,637 --> 00:40:55,153 - Oh, I just came in to wish him luck. 1010 00:40:55,153 --> 00:40:56,883 - Come on, out, out. 1011 00:40:57,990 --> 00:40:59,560 Mother says good luck, too. 1012 00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:01,320 John, when you read the speech please, 1013 00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:02,940 please believe every word. 1014 00:41:02,940 --> 00:41:05,029 He turned out to be wonderful person John. 1015 00:41:05,029 --> 00:41:05,862 - Who? 1016 00:41:05,862 --> 00:41:06,960 - [Ann] John Doe, the one in the speech. 1017 00:41:06,960 --> 00:41:07,793 - Oh. 1018 00:41:07,793 --> 00:41:09,010 - [Ann] You know something? 1019 00:41:09,010 --> 00:41:10,910 I've actually fallen in love with him. 1020 00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:13,113 - All right, there he is, sister. 1021 00:41:13,113 --> 00:41:15,030 Now come, plenty of bulk. - What's the idea? 1022 00:41:15,030 --> 00:41:16,522 - No, no, no, no, no that's too much. 1023 00:41:16,522 --> 00:41:18,700 That's not what, not so much, come on. 1024 00:41:18,700 --> 00:41:19,700 - [Man] That's it. 1025 00:41:19,700 --> 00:41:21,950 - Oh, this is no time for cheap publicity, Mr. Connell. 1026 00:41:21,950 --> 00:41:24,940 - Listen if that guy lays an egg I want something out of it. 1027 00:41:24,940 --> 00:41:26,480 I'm getting a Jane Doe ready. 1028 00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:27,721 - Ah come on, will you fellas? 1029 00:41:27,721 --> 00:41:29,113 Give me a chance, I have to-- 1030 00:41:29,113 --> 00:41:30,106 - Just one more, will you please? 1031 00:41:30,106 --> 00:41:31,385 - Now that's fine honey, you go ahead. 1032 00:41:31,385 --> 00:41:32,497 After you. 1033 00:41:32,497 --> 00:41:33,850 You've got to be running, go ahead. 1034 00:41:33,850 --> 00:41:35,100 - How you doing? 1035 00:41:35,100 --> 00:41:36,910 - Alright Beany, bring them in. 1036 00:41:36,910 --> 00:41:39,956 - Holy smoke, a half a Heelot. 1037 00:41:39,956 --> 00:41:41,620 - There you are, boss, just like you ordered. 1038 00:41:41,620 --> 00:41:42,790 Symbols of little people. 1039 00:41:42,790 --> 00:41:44,710 - Okay, get 'em up. - Alright little fella. 1040 00:41:44,710 --> 00:41:46,240 - This is ridiculous, Mr. Connell. 1041 00:41:46,240 --> 00:41:47,073 Come on give me a chance. 1042 00:41:47,073 --> 00:41:48,995 The man's on the air in only a few more minutes. 1043 00:41:48,995 --> 00:41:50,668 Oh, fellas I told you can have 1044 00:41:50,668 --> 00:41:52,468 all the pictures you want afterward. 1045 00:41:52,468 --> 00:41:53,630 No, come on, Ed. 1046 00:41:53,630 --> 00:41:54,704 And how about you? 1047 00:41:54,704 --> 00:41:55,590 Come on, come on, that's right. 1048 00:41:55,590 --> 00:41:56,909 Afterwards you can get all the pictures you want. 1049 00:41:56,909 --> 00:41:58,340 - [Man] Oh I know but, well thank you very much. 1050 00:41:58,340 --> 00:41:59,173 - Come on, will you? 1051 00:41:59,173 --> 00:42:00,150 That way, that's right. 1052 00:42:00,150 --> 00:42:00,983 - Come on Snooks. 1053 00:42:00,983 --> 00:42:02,139 You better bail out. 1054 00:42:02,139 --> 00:42:04,212 - Well, goodbye, Mr. Doe. 1055 00:42:04,212 --> 00:42:05,045 - Beany. 1056 00:42:05,045 --> 00:42:06,628 - Alright, alright. 1057 00:42:08,700 --> 00:42:09,982 - Better get ready, one minute to go. 1058 00:42:09,982 --> 00:42:12,277 - Wow, one minute to go and the score's nothing to nothing. 1059 00:42:12,277 --> 00:42:13,990 Now please, John. 1060 00:42:13,990 --> 00:42:15,823 You won't let me down, will ya? 1061 00:42:17,342 --> 00:42:18,175 Will ya? 1062 00:42:19,350 --> 00:42:20,660 Of course you won't. 1063 00:42:20,660 --> 00:42:23,363 If you'll just think of yourself as the real John Doe. 1064 00:42:24,240 --> 00:42:26,100 Listen, everything in that speech 1065 00:42:26,100 --> 00:42:28,040 are things a certain man believed in. 1066 00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:30,410 He was my father, John. 1067 00:42:30,410 --> 00:42:32,623 When he talked, people listened. 1068 00:42:32,623 --> 00:42:34,173 And they'll listen to you, too. 1069 00:42:35,450 --> 00:42:38,883 Funny, you know what my mother said the other night? 1070 00:42:39,900 --> 00:42:43,333 She said to look into your eyes and I'd see my father there. 1071 00:42:46,130 --> 00:42:47,950 - Hey what do you say? - Okay, we're coming. 1072 00:42:47,950 --> 00:42:48,783 Come on. 1073 00:42:49,810 --> 00:42:51,730 Now listen, John, you're a pitcher. 1074 00:42:51,730 --> 00:42:53,163 Now get in there and pitch. 1075 00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:56,400 Good luck. 1076 00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:58,642 - [Beany] Give him room, let him through, come on. 1077 00:42:58,642 --> 00:43:01,059 (chattering) 1078 00:43:13,203 --> 00:43:14,410 - Hey, let's get out of here. 1079 00:43:14,410 --> 00:43:15,361 There's the door right there. 1080 00:43:15,361 --> 00:43:16,470 - [Man] Hey what are you doing here? 1081 00:43:16,470 --> 00:43:17,600 - That's what I'd like to know. 1082 00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:18,550 - [Man] Come on, out, out. 1083 00:43:18,550 --> 00:43:19,383 - Hey, he's a friend of mine. 1084 00:43:19,383 --> 00:43:21,470 - Never mind, let him alone, he's alright. 1085 00:43:24,203 --> 00:43:27,620 I'll be right over there pulling for you. 1086 00:43:29,673 --> 00:43:31,006 John, over here. 1087 00:43:35,950 --> 00:43:36,893 - [Man] Stand by. 1088 00:43:38,642 --> 00:43:41,059 (applauding) 1089 00:44:08,858 --> 00:44:09,691 - Phone the Chronicle. 1090 00:44:09,691 --> 00:44:12,437 Tell 'em to start getting those extras out. 1091 00:44:29,759 --> 00:44:32,676 (orchestral music) 1092 00:44:34,037 --> 00:44:35,510 - And good evening ladies and gentlemen, 1093 00:44:35,510 --> 00:44:37,830 this is Kenneth Fry speaking for the New Bulletin. 1094 00:44:37,830 --> 00:44:40,860 Tonight we give you something entirely new and different. 1095 00:44:40,860 --> 00:44:42,450 Standing beside me is the young man 1096 00:44:42,450 --> 00:44:44,070 who has declared publicly that 1097 00:44:44,070 --> 00:44:46,750 on Christmas Eve he intends to commit suicide, 1098 00:44:46,750 --> 00:44:48,730 giving as his reason, quote, 1099 00:44:48,730 --> 00:44:51,420 I protest against the state of civilization. 1100 00:44:51,420 --> 00:44:52,580 End quote. 1101 00:44:52,580 --> 00:44:55,010 Ladies and gentlemen, the New Bulletin takes pleasure 1102 00:44:55,010 --> 00:44:56,740 in presenting the man who is fast becoming 1103 00:44:56,740 --> 00:45:00,750 the most talked about person in the country, John Doe. 1104 00:45:00,750 --> 00:45:05,750 (orchestral music) (applauding) 1105 00:45:23,934 --> 00:45:25,851 - Ladies and gentlemen. 1106 00:45:28,530 --> 00:45:31,073 I am the man you all know as John Doe. 1107 00:45:32,590 --> 00:45:35,747 I took that name because it seems to describe-- 1108 00:45:38,590 --> 00:45:42,912 Because it seems to describe the average man, and that's me. 1109 00:45:42,912 --> 00:45:43,980 (clearing throat) 1110 00:45:43,980 --> 00:45:44,823 And that's me. 1111 00:45:49,130 --> 00:45:52,240 Well, it was me before I said I was going to jump off 1112 00:45:52,240 --> 00:45:54,933 the City Hall roof at midnight on Christmas Eve. 1113 00:45:56,350 --> 00:45:58,283 Now I guess I'm not average anymore. 1114 00:45:59,750 --> 00:46:02,493 Now I'm getting all sorts of attention, from big shots too. 1115 00:46:02,493 --> 00:46:04,250 - We've been double crossed. - We have? 1116 00:46:04,250 --> 00:46:07,030 - The Mayor and Governor, for instance, 1117 00:46:07,030 --> 00:46:08,773 they don't like those articles I've been writing. 1118 00:46:08,773 --> 00:46:10,850 - You're an impostor, young fella. 1119 00:46:10,850 --> 00:46:12,700 That's a pack of lies you're telling. 1120 00:46:13,900 --> 00:46:16,099 Who wrote that speech for you? 1121 00:46:16,099 --> 00:46:17,878 (angry shouting) 1122 00:46:17,878 --> 00:46:20,177 - Beany, get that guy. 1123 00:46:20,177 --> 00:46:23,324 - [Man] A publicity stunt for the Bulletin. 1124 00:46:23,324 --> 00:46:26,074 (angry shouting) 1125 00:46:27,096 --> 00:46:28,225 A publicity stunt for the Bulletin. 1126 00:46:28,225 --> 00:46:29,290 - Get him out. 1127 00:46:29,290 --> 00:46:30,180 - Spencer. 1128 00:46:30,180 --> 00:46:31,030 - [Radio announcer] Ladies and gentlemen, 1129 00:46:31,030 --> 00:46:32,350 the disturbance you just heard 1130 00:46:32,350 --> 00:46:33,950 was caused by someone in the audience 1131 00:46:33,950 --> 00:46:36,090 who tried to heckle Mr. Doe. 1132 00:46:36,090 --> 00:46:37,340 The speech will continue. 1133 00:46:42,260 --> 00:46:46,559 - Well, people like the Governor people like the Governor-- 1134 00:46:46,559 --> 00:46:50,130 people like the Governor and that fella can stop worrying. 1135 00:46:50,130 --> 00:46:52,230 I'm not gonna talk about them. 1136 00:46:52,230 --> 00:46:56,463 I'm gonna talk about us, the average guys, the John Does. 1137 00:46:57,630 --> 00:47:01,180 If anybody ever asked you what the average John Doe is like, 1138 00:47:01,180 --> 00:47:04,233 you couldn't tell him because he's a million and one things. 1139 00:47:05,150 --> 00:47:07,750 He's Mr. Big and Mr. Small. 1140 00:47:07,750 --> 00:47:09,540 He's simple and he's wise. 1141 00:47:09,540 --> 00:47:11,180 He's inherently honest, 1142 00:47:11,180 --> 00:47:13,390 but he's got a streak of larceny in his heart. 1143 00:47:13,390 --> 00:47:16,280 He seldom walks up to a public telephone without shoving 1144 00:47:16,280 --> 00:47:17,640 his finger in the slot to see 1145 00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:19,397 if somebody left a nickel there. 1146 00:47:19,397 --> 00:47:21,647 (laughing) 1147 00:47:30,710 --> 00:47:33,587 He's the man the ads are written for, 1148 00:47:33,587 --> 00:47:36,730 the fella everybody sells things to. 1149 00:47:36,730 --> 00:47:40,210 He's Joe Dokes, the world's greatest stooge, 1150 00:47:40,210 --> 00:47:42,083 and the world's greatest strength. 1151 00:47:51,356 --> 00:47:52,189 Yes, sir. 1152 00:47:53,470 --> 00:47:56,450 Yes, sir, we're a great family, the John Does. 1153 00:47:56,450 --> 00:48:00,073 We're the meek who are supposed to inherit the earth. 1154 00:48:01,300 --> 00:48:02,970 You'll find us everywhere. 1155 00:48:02,970 --> 00:48:05,820 We raise the crops, we dig the mines, work the factories, 1156 00:48:05,820 --> 00:48:09,130 keep the books, fly the planes, and drive the buses. 1157 00:48:09,130 --> 00:48:11,710 And when a cop yells, stand back there you, 1158 00:48:11,710 --> 00:48:13,773 he means us, the John Does. 1159 00:48:13,773 --> 00:48:15,360 - Well what kind of a speech is that? 1160 00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:16,640 Didn't you read it? 1161 00:48:16,640 --> 00:48:18,660 - We've existed since time began. 1162 00:48:18,660 --> 00:48:22,610 We built the Pyramids, we saw Christ crucified, 1163 00:48:22,610 --> 00:48:25,150 pulled the oars for Roman emperors, 1164 00:48:25,150 --> 00:48:27,260 sailed the boats for Columbus, 1165 00:48:27,260 --> 00:48:29,840 retreated from Moscow with Napoleon, 1166 00:48:29,840 --> 00:48:32,483 and froze with Washington at Valley Forge. 1167 00:48:35,670 --> 00:48:37,520 Yes, sir, we've been in there 1168 00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:41,500 dodging left hooks since before History began to walk. 1169 00:48:41,500 --> 00:48:43,010 In our struggle for freedom 1170 00:48:43,010 --> 00:48:44,560 we've hit the canvas many a time, 1171 00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:46,230 but we always bounce back because 1172 00:48:46,230 --> 00:48:48,236 we're the people and we're tough. 1173 00:48:48,236 --> 00:48:50,653 (applauding) 1174 00:48:53,651 --> 00:48:56,520 They've started a lot of talk about free people going soft, 1175 00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:57,890 that we can't take it. 1176 00:48:57,890 --> 00:48:58,990 That's a lot of hooey. 1177 00:49:00,410 --> 00:49:03,130 The free people can beat the world at anything from war 1178 00:49:03,130 --> 00:49:06,814 to tiddlywinks if we all pull in the same direction. 1179 00:49:06,814 --> 00:49:09,231 (applauding) 1180 00:49:14,250 --> 00:49:17,490 I know a lot of you are saying, what can I do? 1181 00:49:17,490 --> 00:49:18,930 I'm just a little punk. 1182 00:49:18,930 --> 00:49:20,470 I don't count. 1183 00:49:20,470 --> 00:49:21,440 Well you're dead wrong. 1184 00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:24,160 The little punks have always counted because in the long run 1185 00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:26,780 the character of a country is the sum total 1186 00:49:26,780 --> 00:49:28,825 of the character of it's little punks. 1187 00:49:28,825 --> 00:49:31,242 (applauding) 1188 00:49:35,870 --> 00:49:37,307 But we've all got to get in there and pitch. 1189 00:49:37,307 --> 00:49:41,020 We can't win the ball game unless we have team work, 1190 00:49:41,020 --> 00:49:44,180 and that's where every John Doe comes in. 1191 00:49:44,180 --> 00:49:47,560 It's up to him to get together with his team mate, 1192 00:49:47,560 --> 00:49:52,190 and your team mate, my friends, is the guy next door to you. 1193 00:49:52,190 --> 00:49:54,580 Your neighbor, he's a terribly important guy, 1194 00:49:54,580 --> 00:49:56,530 that guy next door. 1195 00:49:56,530 --> 00:49:57,420 You're gonna need him 1196 00:49:57,420 --> 00:49:59,780 and he's gonna need you so look him up. 1197 00:49:59,780 --> 00:50:01,730 If he's sick, call on him. 1198 00:50:01,730 --> 00:50:03,630 If he's hungry, feed him. 1199 00:50:03,630 --> 00:50:06,003 If he's out of a job, find him one. 1200 00:50:06,860 --> 00:50:08,930 To most of you, your neighbor is a stranger. 1201 00:50:08,930 --> 00:50:11,960 A guy with a barking dog and a high fence around him. 1202 00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:13,210 Now you can't be a stranger 1203 00:50:13,210 --> 00:50:15,750 to any guy that's on your own team. 1204 00:50:15,750 --> 00:50:18,540 So tear down the fence that separates you. 1205 00:50:18,540 --> 00:50:20,830 Tear down the fence and you'll tear down 1206 00:50:20,830 --> 00:50:22,850 a lot of hates and prejudices. 1207 00:50:22,850 --> 00:50:24,730 Tear down all the fences in the country 1208 00:50:24,730 --> 00:50:25,937 and you'll really have teamwork. 1209 00:50:25,937 --> 00:50:28,354 (applauding) 1210 00:50:35,166 --> 00:50:37,480 I know a lot of you are saying to yourselves, 1211 00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:39,270 he's asking for a miracle to happen. 1212 00:50:39,270 --> 00:50:42,650 He's expecting people to change all of a sudden. 1213 00:50:42,650 --> 00:50:43,483 Well, you're wrong. 1214 00:50:43,483 --> 00:50:44,480 It's no miracle. 1215 00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:47,150 It's no miracle because I see it happen 1216 00:50:47,150 --> 00:50:51,343 once a year and so do you, at Christmas time. 1217 00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:55,350 There's something swell about the spirit of Christmas. 1218 00:50:55,350 --> 00:50:59,030 To see what it does to people, all kinds of people. 1219 00:50:59,030 --> 00:51:03,060 Now why can't that spirit, that same warm Christmas spirit, 1220 00:51:03,060 --> 00:51:05,210 last the whole year round? 1221 00:51:05,210 --> 00:51:06,043 Gosh. 1222 00:51:07,060 --> 00:51:10,330 If it ever did, if each and every John Doe 1223 00:51:10,330 --> 00:51:14,220 would make that spirit last 365 days out of the year 1224 00:51:14,220 --> 00:51:15,820 we'd develop such a strength, 1225 00:51:15,820 --> 00:51:18,290 we'd create such a tidal wave of goodwill 1226 00:51:18,290 --> 00:51:20,593 that no human force could stand against it. 1227 00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:23,473 Yes sir, my friends, 1228 00:51:24,900 --> 00:51:28,450 the meek can only inherit the Earth when the John Does 1229 00:51:28,450 --> 00:51:29,900 start loving their neighbors. 1230 00:51:30,900 --> 00:51:32,303 You better start right now. 1231 00:51:33,310 --> 00:51:36,210 Don't wait till the game is called on account of darkness. 1232 00:51:37,904 --> 00:51:40,304 Wake up, John Doe, you're the hope of the world. 1233 00:51:49,300 --> 00:51:50,925 - John, you were wonderful. 1234 00:51:50,925 --> 00:51:55,592 (applauding) (cheering) 1235 00:51:58,804 --> 00:52:02,554 - Let's get out of here. - Now you're talking. 1236 00:52:04,004 --> 00:52:05,879 (chattering) 1237 00:52:05,879 --> 00:52:10,334 Gangway, you Heelots. (chattering) 1238 00:52:10,334 --> 00:52:11,167 Hey. 1239 00:52:19,023 --> 00:52:20,050 (sighing) 1240 00:52:20,050 --> 00:52:21,900 I knew you'd wake up sooner or later. 1241 00:52:22,950 --> 00:52:25,290 Boy, am I glad we got out of that mess. 1242 00:52:25,290 --> 00:52:27,983 - I had the 5,000 all sewed up. 1243 00:52:27,983 --> 00:52:30,033 Could've been on my way to old Doc Brown. 1244 00:52:32,217 --> 00:52:33,467 "You're a pitcher, John" she says. 1245 00:52:33,467 --> 00:52:35,100 "Now go in there and pitch." 1246 00:52:35,100 --> 00:52:36,448 What a sucker. 1247 00:52:36,448 --> 00:52:38,650 - She's a Heelot just like the rest. 1248 00:52:38,650 --> 00:52:40,140 Lucky you got away from her. 1249 00:52:40,140 --> 00:52:43,550 - What was I doing making a speech, anyway, me, huh? 1250 00:52:43,550 --> 00:52:45,450 Jeez, the more I think about it the more I could-- 1251 00:52:45,450 --> 00:52:47,210 - Tear town all the fences. 1252 00:52:47,210 --> 00:52:48,768 Why, if you tore one picket off 1253 00:52:48,768 --> 00:52:50,723 your neighbor's fence, he'd sue you. 1254 00:52:50,723 --> 00:52:52,850 - 5,000, had it right in my hand. 1255 00:52:52,850 --> 00:52:54,960 - What do you mean he ran away? 1256 00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:56,190 Well go after him, find him. 1257 00:52:56,190 --> 00:52:57,240 That man is terrific. 1258 00:52:58,167 --> 00:53:01,000 (train whistling) 1259 00:53:04,371 --> 00:53:05,954 - And here we come. 1260 00:53:07,362 --> 00:53:10,195 (harmonica music) 1261 00:53:12,291 --> 00:53:16,374 (mimicking a musical instrument) 1262 00:53:19,751 --> 00:53:22,584 (harmonica music) 1263 00:53:34,613 --> 00:53:37,446 (train whistling) 1264 00:53:38,526 --> 00:53:41,109 (groovy music) 1265 00:53:52,344 --> 00:53:53,743 Jitterbugs. 1266 00:53:53,743 --> 00:53:54,576 Yeah. 1267 00:53:55,410 --> 00:53:56,806 - How much money we got left? 1268 00:53:56,806 --> 00:53:57,900 - Four bits. 1269 00:53:57,900 --> 00:53:58,881 - Better make it doughnuts, huh? 1270 00:53:58,881 --> 00:53:59,714 - Yeah. 1271 00:54:03,473 --> 00:54:06,306 (harmonica music) 1272 00:54:12,269 --> 00:54:14,060 - What'll it be, gents? 1273 00:54:14,060 --> 00:54:14,893 - Have you got a couple of steaks 1274 00:54:14,893 --> 00:54:17,140 about that big and that thick? 1275 00:54:17,140 --> 00:54:19,288 - [Colonel] Yeah, with hash brown potatoes and tomatoes 1276 00:54:19,288 --> 00:54:22,210 and apple pie and ice cream and coffee? 1277 00:54:22,210 --> 00:54:24,140 - And doughnuts, I know. 1278 00:54:24,140 --> 00:54:27,072 Hey, Ma, sinkers, a pair. 1279 00:54:27,072 --> 00:54:28,030 - [Woman] Sinkers, a pair, comin' up. 1280 00:54:28,930 --> 00:54:30,580 - Glad he took the T out of that. 1281 00:54:35,660 --> 00:54:37,153 - Hey Look. 1282 00:54:38,260 --> 00:54:41,789 - [Colonel] Join the John Doe Club. 1283 00:54:41,789 --> 00:54:46,789 - [John] John Doe Club? 1284 00:54:49,324 --> 00:54:52,940 - Uh-oh. 1285 00:54:52,940 --> 00:54:54,350 - Are you John Doe? - Who? 1286 00:54:54,350 --> 00:54:55,183 - John Doe. 1287 00:54:55,183 --> 00:54:57,410 - [Colonel] Ah, you need glasses, buddy. 1288 00:54:57,410 --> 00:54:58,600 - It's the spitting image of John Doe. 1289 00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:00,197 - Yeah, but his name's Willoughby. 1290 00:55:00,197 --> 00:55:02,588 - [John] I'm John Willoughby, I'm a baseball player. 1291 00:55:02,588 --> 00:55:04,970 - Ah, no, I'd know that voice anywhere. 1292 00:55:04,970 --> 00:55:06,850 You can't kid me. 1293 00:55:06,850 --> 00:55:08,523 You're John Doe. 1294 00:55:08,523 --> 00:55:09,695 Ma! 1295 00:55:09,695 --> 00:55:10,605 Ma. 1296 00:55:10,605 --> 00:55:12,477 That's John Doe. - John Doe? 1297 00:55:12,477 --> 00:55:14,354 - Yeah, sitting right there, big as life. 1298 00:55:14,354 --> 00:55:15,392 - Who'd you say it was? 1299 00:55:15,392 --> 00:55:17,892 - John Doe, the big guy there. 1300 00:55:18,954 --> 00:55:23,454 (frantic chattering) That is John Doe. 1301 00:55:29,647 --> 00:55:32,050 Hey Operator, Dan Beaver. 1302 00:55:32,050 --> 00:55:33,260 Call everybody in town. 1303 00:55:33,260 --> 00:55:35,100 John Doe was just in my place. 1304 00:55:35,100 --> 00:55:36,843 Yeah, he ordered doughnuts. 1305 00:55:44,465 --> 00:55:45,969 - [Man] John Doe. 1306 00:55:45,969 --> 00:55:48,223 Let's see John Doe. 1307 00:55:48,223 --> 00:55:50,852 (horn honking) 1308 00:55:50,852 --> 00:55:53,048 - You're all here to see John Doe and you're all neighbors, 1309 00:55:53,048 --> 00:55:54,840 but my office is packed like a sardine box. 1310 00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:56,570 - [Woman] What does John Doe look like, Mr. Mayor? 1311 00:55:56,570 --> 00:55:59,300 - Oh he's one of those great, big, outdoor type men. 1312 00:55:59,300 --> 00:56:01,560 No you can't see him, you didn't vote for me the last time. 1313 00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:02,700 Shame on you, what are you doing here? 1314 00:56:02,700 --> 00:56:03,980 Get off my front porch. 1315 00:56:03,980 --> 00:56:05,750 Mr. Norton come yet? 1316 00:56:05,750 --> 00:56:06,906 Well wonder where he is, what's keeping him? 1317 00:56:06,906 --> 00:56:08,755 He should've been here 15 minutes ago. 1318 00:56:08,755 --> 00:56:10,233 There he comes now. 1319 00:56:10,233 --> 00:56:13,700 (sirens blaring) 1320 00:56:13,700 --> 00:56:14,660 Now everybody on your dignity. 1321 00:56:14,660 --> 00:56:16,680 Don't do anything to disgrace our little town. 1322 00:56:16,680 --> 00:56:17,580 We gotta show off. 1323 00:56:20,900 --> 00:56:21,733 - Better let me talk to him. 1324 00:56:21,733 --> 00:56:22,830 - Alright, but present it to him 1325 00:56:22,830 --> 00:56:24,410 as a great cause for the common man. 1326 00:56:24,410 --> 00:56:25,243 - [Man] Ah here he comes. 1327 00:56:25,243 --> 00:56:27,690 Give him room down there, give him room. 1328 00:56:27,690 --> 00:56:28,799 Come on now. 1329 00:56:28,799 --> 00:56:30,134 - Here they come, here they come. 1330 00:56:30,134 --> 00:56:31,572 Here's Mr. Norton. 1331 00:56:31,572 --> 00:56:32,670 How do you do, Mr. Norton? 1332 00:56:32,670 --> 00:56:33,603 I'm Mayor Hawkins. 1333 00:56:34,578 --> 00:56:36,747 - The crowd back there. - Let me go you darn fool. 1334 00:56:36,747 --> 00:56:37,580 I'm the Mayor. 1335 00:56:37,580 --> 00:56:41,030 Mr. Norton, Mr. Norton, Mr. Norton, I'm Mayor Hawkins. 1336 00:56:41,030 --> 00:56:42,700 Your office telephoned me to hold him. 1337 00:56:42,700 --> 00:56:43,950 - Well that's fine, how is he? 1338 00:56:43,950 --> 00:56:45,750 - Oh he's fine, he's right in my office there. 1339 00:56:45,750 --> 00:56:48,340 You know it's a big honor having John Doe here, and you too. 1340 00:56:48,340 --> 00:56:49,250 Haven't had so much excitement 1341 00:56:49,250 --> 00:56:51,500 since the old City Hall burnt down. 1342 00:56:51,500 --> 00:56:53,598 People so excited, they nearly tore his clothes off. 1343 00:56:53,598 --> 00:56:55,280 Oh Matilda, phone the newspapers. 1344 00:56:55,280 --> 00:56:56,113 Tell them Mr. Norton's here. 1345 00:56:56,113 --> 00:56:58,090 Step inside, Mr. Norton, to my office. 1346 00:56:58,090 --> 00:56:59,703 It's very comfortable Mr. Norton. 1347 00:56:59,703 --> 00:57:00,762 Just had it air-conditioned. 1348 00:57:00,762 --> 00:57:03,009 Gangway please, make room for Mr. Norton. 1349 00:57:03,009 --> 00:57:04,593 Gangway, gangway. 1350 00:57:04,593 --> 00:57:06,400 Here he is Mr. Norton, well taken care of. 1351 00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:08,670 The neighbors are serving him a light lunch. 1352 00:57:08,670 --> 00:57:09,503 - Hello, John. 1353 00:57:11,350 --> 00:57:12,820 - Hello. 1354 00:57:12,820 --> 00:57:14,140 - Mr. Mayor, if you don't mind, 1355 00:57:14,140 --> 00:57:15,520 we'd like to talk to him alone. 1356 00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:16,860 - Why certainly, certainly. 1357 00:57:16,860 --> 00:57:18,596 Alright everybody clear out. 1358 00:57:18,596 --> 00:57:20,147 Everybody, quickly now. 1359 00:57:20,147 --> 00:57:20,980 Come on. 1360 00:57:20,980 --> 00:57:21,813 Come on. 1361 00:57:23,505 --> 00:57:26,863 That's right, come on. 1362 00:57:28,600 --> 00:57:29,590 Don't argue with me here. 1363 00:57:29,590 --> 00:57:30,445 Wait till we get home. 1364 00:57:30,445 --> 00:57:31,761 - Don't you push me around like that 1365 00:57:31,761 --> 00:57:33,603 even though I am your wife. 1366 00:57:33,603 --> 00:57:35,670 - Look Mr. Norton, I think you got a lot of nerve 1367 00:57:35,670 --> 00:57:37,393 having these people hold us here. 1368 00:57:38,800 --> 00:57:41,520 - There's nobody holding you here Mr. Doe. 1369 00:57:41,520 --> 00:57:42,353 It's only natural that-- 1370 00:57:42,353 --> 00:57:44,610 - If there's nobody holding us here let's get going. 1371 00:57:44,610 --> 00:57:46,520 Incidentally, my name isn't Doe, it's Willoughby. 1372 00:57:46,520 --> 00:57:47,790 - Look, John. 1373 00:57:47,790 --> 00:57:49,550 Something important happened. 1374 00:57:49,550 --> 00:57:51,090 They're forming John Doe Clubs. 1375 00:57:51,090 --> 00:57:52,910 We know of eight already and they say-- 1376 00:57:52,910 --> 00:57:54,155 - John Doe Clubs, what for? 1377 00:57:54,155 --> 00:57:55,240 - To carry out the principles 1378 00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:56,980 you talked about in your radio speech. 1379 00:57:56,980 --> 00:57:58,130 - I don't care what they're forming. 1380 00:57:58,130 --> 00:57:59,350 I'm on my way and I don't like 1381 00:57:59,350 --> 00:58:00,552 the idea of being stopped either. 1382 00:58:00,552 --> 00:58:02,470 - Oh, but you don't how big this thing is. 1383 00:58:02,470 --> 00:58:04,060 You should see the thousands of telegrams 1384 00:58:04,060 --> 00:58:06,440 we've received and what they're saying about you. 1385 00:58:06,440 --> 00:58:09,210 - Look, it started as a circulation stunt, didn't it? 1386 00:58:09,210 --> 00:58:10,467 Well you got your circulation. 1387 00:58:10,467 --> 00:58:11,880 Now why don't you let me alone? 1388 00:58:11,880 --> 00:58:14,700 - Oh it started as a circulation stunt but it isn't anymore. 1389 00:58:14,700 --> 00:58:16,000 Mr. Norton wants to get in back of it 1390 00:58:16,000 --> 00:58:18,240 and sponsor clubs all over the country. 1391 00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:20,190 He wants to send you on a lecture tour. 1392 00:58:21,090 --> 00:58:22,013 - Me? - Uh-huh. 1393 00:58:22,013 --> 00:58:22,846 - Certainly. 1394 00:58:22,846 --> 00:58:24,930 With your ability to influence people, 1395 00:58:24,930 --> 00:58:27,210 it might grow into a glorious movement. 1396 00:58:27,210 --> 00:58:29,360 - Then let's get something straight here. 1397 00:58:29,360 --> 00:58:31,495 I don't want any part of this. 1398 00:58:31,495 --> 00:58:32,930 If you got an idea I'm going around 1399 00:58:32,930 --> 00:58:35,410 lecturing to people why you're crazy. 1400 00:58:35,410 --> 00:58:37,610 Baseball's my racket and I'm sticking to it. 1401 00:58:38,800 --> 00:58:40,381 Come on Colonel, let's get out of here. 1402 00:58:40,381 --> 00:58:41,214 - John-- 1403 00:58:41,214 --> 00:58:43,950 - [Hawkins] Please, please I just got rid of one crowd. 1404 00:58:43,950 --> 00:58:45,460 - But please, Mr. Mayor, 1405 00:58:45,460 --> 00:58:48,620 tell him the John Doe Club wants to talk to him. 1406 00:58:48,620 --> 00:58:50,610 - Let them in, Mr. Mayor, let them come in. 1407 00:58:50,610 --> 00:58:52,190 - Okay folks but remember your manners. 1408 00:58:52,190 --> 00:58:53,370 No stampeding. 1409 00:58:53,370 --> 00:58:56,213 Walk slow, like you do when you come to pay your taxes. 1410 00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:04,193 - Okay. 1411 00:59:04,193 --> 00:59:05,790 All right, give me a chance. 1412 00:59:05,790 --> 00:59:06,833 - Come right in. 1413 00:59:09,276 --> 00:59:11,270 - My name's Bert Hansen, Mr. Doe. 1414 00:59:11,270 --> 00:59:15,170 I'm the head soda-jerker at Schwabacher's drugstore. 1415 00:59:15,170 --> 00:59:18,800 Well, sir, you see me and my wife, we heard your broadcast 1416 00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:20,490 and we got quite a bang out of it. 1417 00:59:20,490 --> 00:59:22,000 Especially my wife. 1418 00:59:22,000 --> 00:59:23,617 Kept me up half the night saying, 1419 00:59:23,617 --> 00:59:25,077 "that man's right, honey. 1420 00:59:25,077 --> 00:59:26,127 "Trouble with the world is 1421 00:59:26,127 --> 00:59:28,237 "nobody gives a hoot about his neighbor. 1422 00:59:28,237 --> 00:59:29,567 "That's why everybody in town 1423 00:59:29,567 --> 00:59:31,550 "is sore and cranky with each other." 1424 00:59:31,550 --> 00:59:33,297 I said, "that's fine, 1425 00:59:33,297 --> 00:59:35,357 "but how's a guy gonna go around lovin' 1426 00:59:35,357 --> 00:59:37,057 "the kind of neighbors we got? 1427 00:59:37,057 --> 00:59:38,757 "Old Sourpuss, for instance." 1428 00:59:38,757 --> 00:59:39,590 (laughing) 1429 00:59:39,590 --> 00:59:43,040 You see, Sourpuss Smithers lives alone next door to us. 1430 00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:44,800 He's a cranky old man who runs 1431 00:59:44,800 --> 00:59:46,070 the second hand furniture store. 1432 00:59:46,070 --> 00:59:47,903 We haven't spoken to him for years. 1433 00:59:48,990 --> 00:59:50,390 I always figured he was 1434 00:59:50,390 --> 00:59:52,450 an ornery old gent that hated the world 1435 00:59:52,450 --> 00:59:54,770 'cause was always slamming his garage door 1436 00:59:54,770 --> 00:59:58,122 and playing the radio so loud it kept half the neighbors up. 1437 00:59:58,122 --> 01:00:00,350 (laughing) 1438 01:00:00,350 --> 01:00:03,430 Well anyway, the next morning I'm out watering the lawn 1439 01:00:03,430 --> 01:00:05,060 and I look over and there's Sourpuss 1440 01:00:05,060 --> 01:00:06,240 on the other side of the hedge 1441 01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:08,800 straightening out a dent in his fender. 1442 01:00:08,800 --> 01:00:11,950 And my wife yells to me out the window, 1443 01:00:11,950 --> 01:00:14,390 she says, "go on, speak to him, Bert." 1444 01:00:14,390 --> 01:00:16,590 I figured well heck I can't lose anything, 1445 01:00:16,590 --> 01:00:20,340 so I yelled over to him, "good morning, Mr. Smithers." 1446 01:00:20,340 --> 01:00:22,520 He went right on pounding his fender. 1447 01:00:22,520 --> 01:00:23,530 Was I burned. 1448 01:00:23,530 --> 01:00:26,720 So I turned around to give my wife a dirty look. 1449 01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:29,950 She said, "louder, he didn't hear you." 1450 01:00:29,950 --> 01:00:31,050 So in a voice you could've heard 1451 01:00:31,050 --> 01:00:32,417 in the next county I yelled, 1452 01:00:32,417 --> 01:00:33,696 "good morning, Mr. Smithers!" 1453 01:00:33,696 --> 01:00:36,520 (laughing) 1454 01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:39,390 Well sir, you could have knocked me over with a feather. 1455 01:00:39,390 --> 01:00:42,350 Old Sourpuss turned around, surprised like, 1456 01:00:42,350 --> 01:00:46,090 put on a big smile, came over and took my hand 1457 01:00:46,090 --> 01:00:49,827 like an old lodge brother and said, "good morning, Hansen. 1458 01:00:49,827 --> 01:00:51,450 "I've been wanting to talk to you for years 1459 01:00:51,450 --> 01:00:52,990 "only I thought you didn't like me." 1460 01:00:52,990 --> 01:00:56,410 Then he started chatting away like a happy little kid. 1461 01:00:56,410 --> 01:00:58,117 He got so excited his eyes-- 1462 01:00:59,000 --> 01:01:01,270 Well, Mr. Doe before we got through 1463 01:01:01,270 --> 01:01:04,820 I found out Smithers is a swell egg, only he's pretty deaf 1464 01:01:04,820 --> 01:01:06,890 and that accounts for all the noises. 1465 01:01:06,890 --> 01:01:10,050 He says it's a shame how little we know about our neighbors. 1466 01:01:10,050 --> 01:01:11,650 And then he got an idea. 1467 01:01:11,650 --> 01:01:14,267 And he said, "how's about inviting everybody some place 1468 01:01:14,267 --> 01:01:15,707 "where we can all get together 1469 01:01:15,707 --> 01:01:18,170 "and know each other a little better?" 1470 01:01:18,170 --> 01:01:20,730 Well I'm feeling so good by this time I ripe for anything. 1471 01:01:20,730 --> 01:01:22,440 So Smithers goes around the neighborhood 1472 01:01:22,440 --> 01:01:24,700 inviting everybody to a meeting at the schoolhouse. 1473 01:01:24,700 --> 01:01:26,023 And I tell everybody that comes 1474 01:01:26,023 --> 01:01:29,383 into the store, including Mr. Schwabacher my boss. 1475 01:01:30,290 --> 01:01:31,123 I'm talking too much. 1476 01:01:31,123 --> 01:01:33,253 - Oh no. (chattering) 1477 01:01:34,990 --> 01:01:38,730 - Well, I'll be doggone if for 40 people don't show up. 1478 01:01:38,730 --> 01:01:40,010 Course, none of us knew what to do, 1479 01:01:40,010 --> 01:01:42,900 but we sure got a kick out of seeing how glad everybody 1480 01:01:42,900 --> 01:01:45,501 was just to say hello to one another. 1481 01:01:45,501 --> 01:01:47,220 - Tell him about making Sourpuss chairman, honey. 1482 01:01:47,220 --> 01:01:49,200 - Oh yeah, we made Sourpuss chairman 1483 01:01:49,200 --> 01:01:51,970 and decided to call ourselves the John Doe Club. 1484 01:01:51,970 --> 01:01:53,690 Say, incidentally, this is my wife. 1485 01:01:53,690 --> 01:01:55,330 Come here, honey. 1486 01:01:55,330 --> 01:01:57,020 This is my wife, Mr. Doe. 1487 01:01:57,020 --> 01:01:58,270 - How do you do, Mr. Doe? 1488 01:01:59,332 --> 01:02:00,891 Sourpuss is here, too. 1489 01:02:00,891 --> 01:02:02,474 - [John] Oh, is he? 1490 01:02:03,978 --> 01:02:07,480 - This is Sourpuss, or excuse me, Mr. Smithers, Mr. Doe. 1491 01:02:07,480 --> 01:02:09,310 - That's alright, if you didn't call me Sourpuss, 1492 01:02:09,310 --> 01:02:10,488 it wouldn't feel natural. 1493 01:02:10,488 --> 01:02:12,580 (laughing) 1494 01:02:12,580 --> 01:02:14,910 - Well anyway, I guess nearly everybody 1495 01:02:14,910 --> 01:02:17,542 in the neighborhood came except the Delaneys. 1496 01:02:17,542 --> 01:02:19,160 The Delaneys live in a big house 1497 01:02:19,160 --> 01:02:20,630 with an iron fence around it 1498 01:02:20,630 --> 01:02:22,880 and they always keep their blinds drawn. 1499 01:02:22,880 --> 01:02:25,830 And we always figured that he was an old miser that sat back 1500 01:02:25,830 --> 01:02:29,870 counting his money, so why bother about inviting him? 1501 01:02:29,870 --> 01:02:33,687 Until Grimes the milkman spoke up and he said, 1502 01:02:33,687 --> 01:02:36,600 "say, you've got the Delaneys all wrong." 1503 01:02:36,600 --> 01:02:37,700 And then he tells us about 1504 01:02:37,700 --> 01:02:39,800 how they canceled their milk last week, 1505 01:02:39,800 --> 01:02:42,300 and he found it looked kind of curious like 1506 01:02:43,300 --> 01:02:46,237 peeked in under the blinds and found the house was empty. 1507 01:02:46,237 --> 01:02:48,920 "If you ask me", he says, "they're starving." 1508 01:02:48,920 --> 01:02:50,840 - Old man Delaney's been bringing 1509 01:02:50,840 --> 01:02:52,920 his furniture over to my place at night, 1510 01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:54,753 one piece at a time and selling it. 1511 01:02:56,543 --> 01:02:58,960 - Well sir a half a dozen of us went over there to fetch him 1512 01:02:58,960 --> 01:03:00,377 and we brought him to the meeting. 1513 01:03:00,377 --> 01:03:02,350 And what a reception they got. 1514 01:03:02,350 --> 01:03:06,040 Everybody shook hands with them and made a fuss over them. 1515 01:03:06,040 --> 01:03:09,500 Well, finally Mr. and Mrs. Delaney sat right down and cried. 1516 01:03:09,500 --> 01:03:10,333 - [Smithers] Then we started to find 1517 01:03:10,333 --> 01:03:11,580 out about a lot of other people. 1518 01:03:11,580 --> 01:03:13,942 - Yeah sure, well you know Grubbel, for instance. 1519 01:03:13,942 --> 01:03:14,892 - Grubbel's here. 1520 01:03:14,892 --> 01:03:15,725 See? 1521 01:03:15,725 --> 01:03:17,818 - Yeah, that's him. 1522 01:03:17,818 --> 01:03:20,130 You don't know Grubbel, but he's the man 1523 01:03:20,130 --> 01:03:23,010 that everybody figured was the worst no account 1524 01:03:23,010 --> 01:03:26,650 in the neighborhood because he lived like a hermit. 1525 01:03:26,650 --> 01:03:28,760 Nobody would have anything to do with him 1526 01:03:28,760 --> 01:03:31,313 that is until Murphy the postman told us the truth. 1527 01:03:32,237 --> 01:03:35,007 "Grubbel," he says, "he lives out of garbage cans 1528 01:03:35,007 --> 01:03:36,487 "because he won't take charity. 1529 01:03:36,487 --> 01:03:39,720 "'Cause it'd ruin his self respect" he says. 1530 01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:41,280 - Just like you said on the radio, Mr. Doe. 1531 01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:44,300 - Well sir, about a dozen families got together 1532 01:03:44,300 --> 01:03:46,100 and gave Grubbel a job watering their lawns. 1533 01:03:46,100 --> 01:03:47,240 Isn't that wonderful? 1534 01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,470 And then we found jobs for six other people 1535 01:03:49,470 --> 01:03:51,540 and they've all gone off relief. 1536 01:03:51,540 --> 01:03:53,060 - And my boss, Mr. Schwabacher, 1537 01:03:53,060 --> 01:03:55,280 made a job in his warehouse for old man Delaney. 1538 01:03:55,280 --> 01:03:56,880 - And he gave you that $5 raise. 1539 01:03:56,880 --> 01:03:58,977 - Yeah, wasn't that swell? 1540 01:04:00,823 --> 01:04:03,160 - Why, Bert, I feel slighted. 1541 01:04:03,160 --> 01:04:06,170 I'd like to join, but nobody asked me. 1542 01:04:06,170 --> 01:04:08,570 - I'm sorry, Mayor, but we voted 1543 01:04:08,570 --> 01:04:10,490 that no politician could join. 1544 01:04:10,490 --> 01:04:13,023 - Just the John Does of the neighborhood. 1545 01:04:13,023 --> 01:04:14,683 You know how politicians are. 1546 01:04:14,683 --> 01:04:18,300 (laughing) - Yeah. 1547 01:04:18,300 --> 01:04:22,030 - Well the reason we wanted to tell you this, Mr. Doe, 1548 01:04:22,030 --> 01:04:25,950 was to give you an idea of what you started. 1549 01:04:25,950 --> 01:04:28,240 From where I'm sitting, I don't see 1550 01:04:28,240 --> 01:04:31,059 any sense in you jumping off any building. 1551 01:04:31,059 --> 01:04:32,810 - [Group] No, no. 1552 01:04:32,810 --> 01:04:34,513 - Well, thank you for listening. 1553 01:04:36,070 --> 01:04:37,213 Goodbye, Mr. Doe. 1554 01:04:38,550 --> 01:04:40,230 You're a wonderful man. 1555 01:04:40,230 --> 01:04:42,210 It strikes me you could be mighty useful 1556 01:04:42,210 --> 01:04:43,703 walking around for a while. 1557 01:04:44,822 --> 01:04:47,239 - Goodbye. - Goodbye, Mr. Doe. 1558 01:04:54,295 --> 01:04:56,970 - I'm Mrs. Delaney, Mr. Doe. 1559 01:04:56,970 --> 01:04:58,723 God bless you, my boy. 1560 01:05:32,998 --> 01:05:35,331 - Gee wiz, I'm all mixed up. 1561 01:05:38,750 --> 01:05:39,693 I don't get it. 1562 01:05:41,290 --> 01:05:42,670 Look, all those swell people 1563 01:05:42,670 --> 01:05:44,860 think I'm gonna jump off a building or something. 1564 01:05:44,860 --> 01:05:46,513 I never had any such idea. 1565 01:05:49,400 --> 01:05:50,233 Gosh. 1566 01:05:51,220 --> 01:05:52,930 A fella would have to be a fine example himself 1567 01:05:52,930 --> 01:05:55,740 to go around telling other people how to-- 1568 01:05:55,740 --> 01:05:56,820 Say look, what happened the other night 1569 01:05:56,820 --> 01:05:58,220 was on account of Miss Mitchell here. 1570 01:05:58,220 --> 01:05:59,951 She wrote the stuff. 1571 01:05:59,951 --> 01:06:02,420 - Don't you see what a wonderful thing this can be? 1572 01:06:02,420 --> 01:06:04,410 But we need you, John. - You're hooked. 1573 01:06:04,410 --> 01:06:06,630 I can see that right now, they got you. 1574 01:06:06,630 --> 01:06:07,773 Well, I'm through. 1575 01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:11,970 For three years I've been trying to get you 1576 01:06:11,970 --> 01:06:13,320 up to the Columbia River country. 1577 01:06:13,320 --> 01:06:15,890 First it was your glass arm, then it was the radio 1578 01:06:15,890 --> 01:06:17,550 and now it's the John Doe Clubs. 1579 01:06:17,550 --> 01:06:19,400 Well, I ain't waiting another minute. 1580 01:06:20,708 --> 01:06:22,430 (chattering) 1581 01:06:22,430 --> 01:06:24,330 Gangway, you heelots! 1582 01:06:24,330 --> 01:06:26,000 (gasping) 1583 01:06:26,000 --> 01:06:27,319 - Hey Colonel, wait a minute. 1584 01:06:27,319 --> 01:06:30,066 (chattering) Hey, Colonel! 1585 01:06:30,066 --> 01:06:31,280 - I want you personally to go along 1586 01:06:31,280 --> 01:06:32,490 with John Doe and Miss Mitchell 1587 01:06:32,490 --> 01:06:33,930 and handle the press and the radio. 1588 01:06:33,930 --> 01:06:34,763 - Me? - Yes. 1589 01:06:34,763 --> 01:06:35,850 I won't take any chances. 1590 01:06:35,850 --> 01:06:37,100 And Johnson. - Yes, D.B.? 1591 01:06:37,100 --> 01:06:38,800 - Your crew will do the mop up job. 1592 01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:40,350 They'll follow John Doe into every town, 1593 01:06:40,350 --> 01:06:41,930 see that the clubs are properly organized 1594 01:06:41,930 --> 01:06:43,520 and the charters issued. - Right. 1595 01:06:43,520 --> 01:06:45,120 - There are eight flags up there now. 1596 01:06:45,120 --> 01:06:48,115 I want to see that map covered before we get through. 1597 01:06:48,115 --> 01:06:51,615 (upbeat orchestral music) 1598 01:07:01,850 --> 01:07:04,100 (cheering) 1599 01:07:31,680 --> 01:07:35,013 (upbeat acoustic music) 1600 01:07:36,067 --> 01:07:38,716 (applauding) 1601 01:07:38,716 --> 01:07:43,549 (parade music) (cheering) 1602 01:07:52,962 --> 01:07:54,850 - This has grown like wildfire. 1603 01:07:54,850 --> 01:07:56,413 If they made demands I'd understand it, 1604 01:07:56,413 --> 01:07:59,330 but the John Does ask for nothing. 1605 01:07:59,330 --> 01:08:00,640 - People are going off relief. 1606 01:08:00,640 --> 01:08:02,501 If this keeps up, I'll be out of a job. 1607 01:08:02,501 --> 01:08:03,560 - As soon as he gets strong enough 1608 01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:05,098 we'll find out what he wants. 1609 01:08:05,098 --> 01:08:07,870 30 every Thursday, 60 at 60. 1610 01:08:07,870 --> 01:08:09,530 Who knows what? 1611 01:08:09,530 --> 01:08:10,403 - I'm sorry, boss, they just won't let 1612 01:08:10,403 --> 01:08:11,963 anybody talk politics with him, it's crazy. 1613 01:08:11,963 --> 01:08:13,865 - We've got to get to them. 1614 01:08:13,865 --> 01:08:16,646 They represent millions of voters. 1615 01:08:16,646 --> 01:08:19,063 (applauding) 1616 01:08:24,860 --> 01:08:26,070 - I tell you ladies and gentlemen, 1617 01:08:26,070 --> 01:08:28,370 this thing has been nothing short of a prairie fire. 1618 01:08:28,370 --> 01:08:30,470 We've received so many applications for charters 1619 01:08:30,470 --> 01:08:31,303 for the John Doe clubs we haven't 1620 01:08:31,303 --> 01:08:32,720 been able to take care of them. 1621 01:08:32,720 --> 01:08:34,603 - [Man] I'd hate to have that many pins stuck in me. 1622 01:08:34,603 --> 01:08:35,580 (laughing) 1623 01:08:35,580 --> 01:08:37,250 - This John Doe convention is a natural. 1624 01:08:37,250 --> 01:08:39,420 It's going to put our city on the map. 1625 01:08:39,420 --> 01:08:41,320 Why over 2,400 John Doe clubs 1626 01:08:41,320 --> 01:08:43,440 are sending delegates, can you imagine that? 1627 01:08:43,440 --> 01:08:45,010 You Mr. Mayor will be the official host. 1628 01:08:45,010 --> 01:08:46,800 You will make the arrangements for decorating the city, 1629 01:08:46,800 --> 01:08:49,290 parades and a reception for John Doe when he gets home. 1630 01:08:49,290 --> 01:08:51,177 And don't wear your high hat. 1631 01:08:51,177 --> 01:08:52,810 - No high hat? - No high hat. 1632 01:08:52,810 --> 01:08:54,610 And from you Connell I want a special 1633 01:08:54,610 --> 01:08:57,400 John Doe edition every day until the convention is over. 1634 01:08:57,400 --> 01:08:59,820 And now please step into the outer office 1635 01:08:59,820 --> 01:09:00,740 and look your prettiest 1636 01:09:00,740 --> 01:09:02,030 because there are photographers there 1637 01:09:02,030 --> 01:09:03,445 to take pictures of this committee. 1638 01:09:03,445 --> 01:09:05,350 - [Man] Don't worry, D.B., everything will be taken care of. 1639 01:09:05,350 --> 01:09:07,205 - Sure. - Isn't it all too wonderful? 1640 01:09:07,205 --> 01:09:10,190 (chattering) 1641 01:09:10,190 --> 01:09:11,081 - [Photographer] Oh Mr. Mayor, would you sit down 1642 01:09:11,081 --> 01:09:11,967 in the front row please? 1643 01:09:11,967 --> 01:09:13,910 You ladies get close to him. 1644 01:09:13,910 --> 01:09:16,010 - Well, I don't get it. - Get what? 1645 01:09:16,010 --> 01:09:18,610 - Look D.B. I'm supposed to know my way around. 1646 01:09:18,610 --> 01:09:20,860 This John Doe movement's cost you a fortune. 1647 01:09:20,860 --> 01:09:23,020 Now this convention is going to cost plenty. 1648 01:09:23,020 --> 01:09:23,853 - Well? 1649 01:09:24,920 --> 01:09:25,817 - I'm stuck with two and two 1650 01:09:25,817 --> 01:09:28,265 and I'm a sucker if I can make four out of it. 1651 01:09:28,265 --> 01:09:29,315 Where do you come in? 1652 01:09:32,988 --> 01:09:34,870 - I have the satisfaction of knowing 1653 01:09:34,870 --> 01:09:37,393 that my money has been spent for a worthy cause. 1654 01:09:38,288 --> 01:09:41,330 - I see, I better stick to running the paper. 1655 01:09:41,330 --> 01:09:42,880 - I think maybe you better had. 1656 01:09:47,094 --> 01:09:50,580 Connell, I'd like to have the John Doe contract, 1657 01:09:50,580 --> 01:09:51,700 all of the receipts for the money 1658 01:09:51,700 --> 01:09:53,430 we advanced for the letter Miss Mitchell wrote 1659 01:09:53,430 --> 01:09:55,477 for which I gave her a $1,000. 1660 01:09:56,540 --> 01:09:57,633 - Yes, sure. 1661 01:09:59,280 --> 01:10:01,810 - Well we leave for the airport in half an hour. 1662 01:10:01,810 --> 01:10:03,150 Is that Johnny boy's room? 1663 01:10:03,150 --> 01:10:03,983 Better hustle him up. 1664 01:10:03,983 --> 01:10:05,270 - He'll be ready on time, he's packing now. 1665 01:10:05,270 --> 01:10:06,103 - Ah good. 1666 01:10:06,103 --> 01:10:08,020 Did you see his picture on the cover of Time? 1667 01:10:08,020 --> 01:10:08,940 - Yeah. 1668 01:10:08,940 --> 01:10:10,400 - I gotta give you credit, Annie girl. 1669 01:10:10,400 --> 01:10:12,670 I've handled a good many big promotions in my time, 1670 01:10:12,670 --> 01:10:14,710 from the World's Fair to a channel swimmer, 1671 01:10:14,710 --> 01:10:17,750 but this one has certainly got me spinning. 1672 01:10:17,750 --> 01:10:20,150 And now, a John Doe convention. 1673 01:10:20,150 --> 01:10:20,983 Wow. 1674 01:10:21,870 --> 01:10:23,370 Hey, if you could only get him 1675 01:10:23,370 --> 01:10:26,660 to jump off City Hall roof on Christmas Eve, 1676 01:10:26,660 --> 01:10:28,909 I'd guarantee you a half a million people there. 1677 01:10:28,909 --> 01:10:30,491 - Charlie? - Hmm? 1678 01:10:30,491 --> 01:10:32,123 - What do you make of him? 1679 01:10:32,123 --> 01:10:33,113 - Who, Johnny boy? 1680 01:10:34,270 --> 01:10:36,663 Well, I don't know what angle you want 1681 01:10:36,663 --> 01:10:38,330 but I'll give it to you quick. 1682 01:10:38,330 --> 01:10:41,720 Number one, he's got great yokel appeal but he's a nice guy. 1683 01:10:41,720 --> 01:10:44,070 Number two, he's beginning to believe he really wrote 1684 01:10:44,070 --> 01:10:46,410 that original suicide letter that you made up. 1685 01:10:46,410 --> 01:10:49,780 Number three, he thinks you're Joan of Arc or something. 1686 01:10:49,780 --> 01:10:50,613 - Yeah I know. 1687 01:10:50,613 --> 01:10:54,610 - [Charlie] Number four, well, you know what number four is. 1688 01:10:54,610 --> 01:10:55,620 He's nuts about you. 1689 01:10:55,620 --> 01:10:57,660 Yeah it's running out of his ears. 1690 01:10:57,660 --> 01:10:58,950 - You left out number five. 1691 01:10:58,950 --> 01:11:00,653 We're all heels, me especially. 1692 01:11:01,731 --> 01:11:02,881 - [Charlie] Holy smoke. 1693 01:11:03,800 --> 01:11:04,633 - Come in. 1694 01:11:10,761 --> 01:11:11,594 - [John] I'm all packed. 1695 01:11:11,594 --> 01:11:13,083 - Good, I'll go and get Beany boy. 1696 01:11:14,280 --> 01:11:16,091 - Okay, Charlie boy. 1697 01:11:16,091 --> 01:11:18,341 (laughing) 1698 01:11:29,290 --> 01:11:31,496 Do you care if I sit down, out here? 1699 01:11:31,496 --> 01:11:36,496 - [Ann] No. 1700 01:11:43,080 --> 01:11:46,043 - You know, I had a crazy dream last night. 1701 01:11:48,920 --> 01:11:50,337 It was about you. 1702 01:11:51,518 --> 01:11:52,435 - About me? 1703 01:11:53,660 --> 01:11:54,493 - Sure was crazy. 1704 01:11:54,493 --> 01:11:56,323 I dreamt I was your father. 1705 01:12:01,846 --> 01:12:04,973 There was something I was trying to stop you from doing. 1706 01:12:06,010 --> 01:12:10,360 So, I got up out of bed, and I walked right 1707 01:12:10,360 --> 01:12:13,600 through the wall here, right straight into your room. 1708 01:12:13,600 --> 01:12:14,833 You know how dreams are. 1709 01:12:16,190 --> 01:12:19,010 And there you were in bed, but you were a little girl, 1710 01:12:19,010 --> 01:12:21,963 you know about 10 and very pretty, too. 1711 01:12:23,590 --> 01:12:26,810 So I shook you and the moment you opened 1712 01:12:26,810 --> 01:12:28,680 your eyes, you hopped out of bed 1713 01:12:28,680 --> 01:12:29,821 and started running like the devil. 1714 01:12:29,821 --> 01:12:30,654 In your nightgown. 1715 01:12:30,654 --> 01:12:31,487 You ran right out the window there 1716 01:12:31,487 --> 01:12:33,270 and you ran over the tops of buildings 1717 01:12:33,270 --> 01:12:36,187 and roofs and everything for miles and I was chasing you. 1718 01:12:38,200 --> 01:12:40,440 And all the time you were running, 1719 01:12:40,440 --> 01:12:42,570 you kept growing bigger and bigger and bigger. 1720 01:12:42,570 --> 01:12:44,080 And pretty soon you were as big 1721 01:12:44,080 --> 01:12:46,833 as you are now, you know, grown up? 1722 01:12:47,690 --> 01:12:50,620 And all the time I kept asking myself, 1723 01:12:50,620 --> 01:12:51,993 what am I chasing her for? 1724 01:12:53,199 --> 01:12:54,533 And I didn't know. 1725 01:12:56,302 --> 01:12:57,352 Isn't that a hot one? 1726 01:12:59,040 --> 01:13:01,570 Well anyway, you ran into some place 1727 01:13:01,570 --> 01:13:02,640 and then I ran in after you. 1728 01:13:02,640 --> 01:13:07,253 And when I got there there you were getting married. 1729 01:13:10,519 --> 01:13:14,103 The nightgown had changed into a beautiful wedding gown. 1730 01:13:16,651 --> 01:13:18,051 You sure looked pretty, too. 1731 01:13:19,570 --> 01:13:22,420 And then I knew what I was trying to stop you from doing. 1732 01:13:23,700 --> 01:13:26,210 Dreams are sure crazy, aren't they? 1733 01:13:26,210 --> 01:13:31,210 Well, would you like to know who it was you were marrying? 1734 01:13:32,043 --> 01:13:35,683 - Oh, a tall handsome Ubangi, I suppose. 1735 01:13:36,759 --> 01:13:37,670 - [John] No, not that bad. 1736 01:13:37,670 --> 01:13:40,360 It was the fella that sends you flowers every day. 1737 01:13:40,360 --> 01:13:41,330 Yeah, what's his name? 1738 01:13:41,330 --> 01:13:42,583 Mr. Norton's nephew? 1739 01:13:44,550 --> 01:13:46,443 - Ted Sheldon. - Yeah, that's the one. 1740 01:13:47,550 --> 01:13:50,200 - But here's the funniest part of it all. 1741 01:13:50,200 --> 01:13:52,120 I was the fella up there doing the marrying. 1742 01:13:52,120 --> 01:13:54,230 You know, the Justice of the Peace or something. 1743 01:13:54,230 --> 01:13:55,136 - You were? 1744 01:13:55,136 --> 01:13:56,750 I thought you were chasing me. 1745 01:13:56,750 --> 01:13:59,733 - Well, yes I was, but I was your father then you see? 1746 01:14:00,610 --> 01:14:05,140 But the real me, John Doe, that is Long John Willoughby, 1747 01:14:05,140 --> 01:14:08,040 I was the fella with a book. 1748 01:14:08,040 --> 01:14:10,410 You know what I mean? - I guess so. 1749 01:14:10,410 --> 01:14:11,940 Then what happened? 1750 01:14:11,940 --> 01:14:16,546 - Well I took you across my knee and I started spanking you. 1751 01:14:16,546 --> 01:14:19,090 That is, I didn't do it, I mean I did do it. 1752 01:14:19,090 --> 01:14:21,393 But it wasn't me, see, I was your father then. 1753 01:14:23,040 --> 01:14:25,567 Well I had you across my knee and I said, 1754 01:14:25,567 --> 01:14:30,493 "Annie, I won't allow you to marry a man that's just rich 1755 01:14:31,867 --> 01:14:35,157 "or that has his secretary send you flowers. 1756 01:14:35,157 --> 01:14:38,047 "The man you marry has got to swim rivers for you, 1757 01:14:38,047 --> 01:14:40,667 "he's got to climb high mountains for you, 1758 01:14:40,667 --> 01:14:42,227 "he's got to slay dragons for you. 1759 01:14:42,227 --> 01:14:45,780 "He's got to perform wonderful deeds for you." 1760 01:14:45,780 --> 01:14:47,660 Yes sir, and all the time, 1761 01:14:47,660 --> 01:14:50,170 the guy up there you know with the book, me, 1762 01:14:50,170 --> 01:14:52,937 just stood there noddin' his head and he said, 1763 01:14:52,937 --> 01:14:54,287 "go to it Pop, whack her one for me 1764 01:14:54,287 --> 01:14:57,060 "because that's the way I feel about it too." 1765 01:14:57,910 --> 01:15:01,180 So he says, "come down and whack her yourself." 1766 01:15:01,180 --> 01:15:04,410 So I came down and I whacked you a good one, see? 1767 01:15:04,410 --> 01:15:06,930 The he whacked you and I whacked you another one. 1768 01:15:06,930 --> 01:15:08,867 We both started whacking you like-- 1769 01:15:10,609 --> 01:15:11,650 - Well if you're through whacking her 1770 01:15:11,650 --> 01:15:12,840 come on let's get going. 1771 01:15:12,840 --> 01:15:14,960 Okay fellas, right in here. 1772 01:15:14,960 --> 01:15:15,793 You go out the side entrance. 1773 01:15:15,793 --> 01:15:18,330 There's a bunch of autograph seekers out front. 1774 01:15:18,330 --> 01:15:20,843 We'll be down with the bags in a minute. 1775 01:15:22,050 --> 01:15:24,860 Come on, don't make a Government project out of this. 1776 01:15:27,910 --> 01:15:29,280 Hi, Beany. 1777 01:15:29,280 --> 01:15:31,119 - When's our plane take off again? 1778 01:15:31,119 --> 01:15:32,697 - Couple of minutes. 1779 01:15:32,697 --> 01:15:35,970 - How many people do you think we've talked to already, 1780 01:15:35,970 --> 01:15:37,502 outside the radio, I mean? 1781 01:15:37,502 --> 01:15:40,822 - Oh, I don't know, about 300,000. 1782 01:15:40,822 --> 01:15:41,655 - 300,000. 1783 01:15:43,380 --> 01:15:44,730 What makes them do it, Ann? 1784 01:15:45,720 --> 01:15:47,156 What makes them come and listen 1785 01:15:47,156 --> 01:15:50,663 and get up their John Doe Clubs the way they do? 1786 01:15:52,832 --> 01:15:53,820 I've been trying to figure it out. 1787 01:15:53,820 --> 01:15:56,960 - Look, John, what we're handing them are platitudes 1788 01:15:56,960 --> 01:15:58,700 things they've heard a million times. 1789 01:15:58,700 --> 01:16:00,850 Love thy neighbor, clouds have silver linings, 1790 01:16:00,850 --> 01:16:01,683 turn the other cheek. 1791 01:16:01,683 --> 01:16:02,516 It's just-- 1792 01:16:02,516 --> 01:16:03,683 - Yeah I heard 'em a million times too, 1793 01:16:03,683 --> 01:16:08,683 but they are, maybe they're like me, 1794 01:16:08,920 --> 01:16:13,623 just beginning to get an idea what those things mean. 1795 01:16:13,623 --> 01:16:15,560 I never really thought much about people before. 1796 01:16:15,560 --> 01:16:18,173 They were always just somebody to fill up the bleachers. 1797 01:16:19,050 --> 01:16:21,160 Only time I worried about them is if they-- 1798 01:16:21,160 --> 01:16:23,273 is when they didn't see me pitch. 1799 01:16:25,110 --> 01:16:27,520 You know, lately I've been 1800 01:16:27,520 --> 01:16:29,220 watching them when I talk to them. 1801 01:16:30,210 --> 01:16:32,033 I see something in their faces. 1802 01:16:33,570 --> 01:16:38,473 I could feel that they were hungry for something. 1803 01:16:40,083 --> 01:16:41,400 You know what I mean? 1804 01:16:41,400 --> 01:16:42,610 Maybe that's why they came. 1805 01:16:42,610 --> 01:16:44,800 Maybe they're just lonely 1806 01:16:46,280 --> 01:16:48,080 and wanted somebody to say hello to. 1807 01:16:49,844 --> 01:16:51,945 I know how they feel. 1808 01:16:51,945 --> 01:16:54,283 I've been lonely and hungry for something 1809 01:16:54,283 --> 01:16:59,283 practically all my life. 1810 01:17:02,680 --> 01:17:04,530 - [Man] All aboard, folks. 1811 01:17:04,530 --> 01:17:05,420 - We'll have the city behind us. 1812 01:17:05,420 --> 01:17:06,757 - Yeah, that's true. 1813 01:17:07,694 --> 01:17:09,004 Oh, somebody else sitting here? 1814 01:17:09,004 --> 01:17:11,072 - No, that's your seat. 1815 01:17:11,072 --> 01:17:13,204 - And this is your coat. 1816 01:17:13,204 --> 01:17:14,340 - Mine? 1817 01:17:14,340 --> 01:17:17,086 - A little token of appreciation. 1818 01:17:17,086 --> 01:17:17,919 - Oh. 1819 01:17:19,993 --> 01:17:22,010 Oh, it's beautiful, D.B. 1820 01:17:22,010 --> 01:17:25,057 Well, I don't quite know what to say. 1821 01:17:25,057 --> 01:17:28,890 - Oh don't say anything at all, just sit down. 1822 01:17:31,490 --> 01:17:33,163 - Go ahead and open it, open it. 1823 01:17:36,932 --> 01:17:37,765 - Oh. 1824 01:17:41,285 --> 01:17:42,770 Oh it's lovely. 1825 01:17:42,770 --> 01:17:44,593 - And a new contract goes with it. 1826 01:17:48,892 --> 01:17:51,337 - Well, come on spring it. 1827 01:17:51,337 --> 01:17:53,940 You've got something on your mind. 1828 01:17:53,940 --> 01:17:56,190 Must be stupendous. (laughing) 1829 01:17:56,190 --> 01:17:57,863 - You know that's what I like about her. 1830 01:17:57,863 --> 01:18:02,152 Right to the point like that. 1831 01:18:02,152 --> 01:18:04,780 Alright practical Annie, here it is. 1832 01:18:04,780 --> 01:18:07,527 Tomorrow night, before a crowd of 15,000 people 1833 01:18:07,527 --> 01:18:10,370 and talking over a nationwide radio hook-up, 1834 01:18:10,370 --> 01:18:14,712 John Doe will announce the formation of a third party. 1835 01:18:14,712 --> 01:18:16,030 - A third party? 1836 01:18:16,030 --> 01:18:18,610 - Yes, the John Doe Party, 1837 01:18:18,610 --> 01:18:20,170 devoted entirely to the interests 1838 01:18:20,170 --> 01:18:23,280 of all the John Does all over the country. 1839 01:18:23,280 --> 01:18:27,733 Which practically means 90% of the voters. 1840 01:18:28,590 --> 01:18:30,899 He will also announce the third party's 1841 01:18:30,899 --> 01:18:33,316 candidate for the presidency. 1842 01:18:34,505 --> 01:18:37,280 A man who he personally recommends. 1843 01:18:37,280 --> 01:18:38,750 A great humanitarian. 1844 01:18:38,750 --> 01:18:40,670 The best friend the John Does have. 1845 01:18:42,621 --> 01:18:44,395 - Mr. D.B. Norton. 1846 01:18:44,395 --> 01:18:49,395 - Yes. 1847 01:18:51,630 --> 01:18:52,463 - Wow. 1848 01:18:53,813 --> 01:18:58,043 ♪ Glory, glory, hallelujah ♪ 1849 01:18:58,043 --> 01:19:02,560 ♪ Glory, glory, hallelujah ♪ 1850 01:19:02,560 --> 01:19:06,587 ♪ Glory, glory, hallelujah ♪ 1851 01:19:06,587 --> 01:19:10,688 ♪ His truth is marching on ♪ 1852 01:19:10,688 --> 01:19:12,938 (cheering) 1853 01:19:18,389 --> 01:19:19,222 - [Radio Broadcaster] And although the opening 1854 01:19:19,222 --> 01:19:20,880 of the convention is hours off the delegates 1855 01:19:20,880 --> 01:19:23,350 are already pouring into the ball park by the droves 1856 01:19:23,350 --> 01:19:26,490 with lunch baskets, banners and petitions asking John Doe 1857 01:19:26,490 --> 01:19:28,155 not to jump off any roof. 1858 01:19:28,155 --> 01:19:28,988 - [Radio Broadcaster] No matter how you look at it, 1859 01:19:28,988 --> 01:19:31,280 it's still a phenomenal movement. 1860 01:19:31,280 --> 01:19:33,500 These John Does or the hoy polloi, 1861 01:19:33,500 --> 01:19:34,763 as you've heard people call them, 1862 01:19:34,763 --> 01:19:36,910 have been laughed at and ridiculed, 1863 01:19:36,910 --> 01:19:39,080 but here they are gay and happy, 1864 01:19:39,080 --> 01:19:42,340 having traveled 1,000s of miles, their expenses paid 1865 01:19:42,340 --> 01:19:44,960 by their neighbors to come to pay homage 1866 01:19:44,960 --> 01:19:46,810 to their hero John Doe. 1867 01:19:46,810 --> 01:19:49,520 - And in these days of wars and bombings, 1868 01:19:49,520 --> 01:19:51,279 it's a hopeful sign that a simple idea 1869 01:19:51,279 --> 01:19:53,200 like this can sweep the country. 1870 01:19:53,200 --> 01:19:57,040 An idea based on friendliness, on giving and not taking, 1871 01:19:57,040 --> 01:19:59,880 on helping your neighbor and asking nothing in return. 1872 01:19:59,880 --> 01:20:01,800 And if a thing like this can happen, 1873 01:20:01,800 --> 01:20:03,660 don't let any of your grumbling friends 1874 01:20:03,660 --> 01:20:06,700 tell you that humanity is falling apart. 1875 01:20:06,700 --> 01:20:09,090 This is John B. Hughes signing off now, 1876 01:20:09,090 --> 01:20:10,570 returning you to our main studio 1877 01:20:10,570 --> 01:20:13,603 until nine o'clock when the convention will officially open. 1878 01:20:15,740 --> 01:20:17,140 - [Woman] Oh, John, come in. 1879 01:20:18,410 --> 01:20:19,720 - Say, I'm kind of... 1880 01:20:20,901 --> 01:20:22,651 It's raining out a little. - That's all right. 1881 01:20:22,651 --> 01:20:25,679 It's good to see you, sit down. 1882 01:20:25,679 --> 01:20:26,512 - Thanks. 1883 01:20:42,030 --> 01:20:43,390 It's for Ann. 1884 01:20:43,390 --> 01:20:46,150 - [Woman] Oh how nice, thank you very much. 1885 01:20:46,150 --> 01:20:46,983 - Flowers. 1886 01:20:48,540 --> 01:20:50,340 - I'm terribly sorry she isn't here. 1887 01:20:51,250 --> 01:20:52,083 - She isn't? 1888 01:20:52,083 --> 01:20:54,300 - No, she just left, I'm surprised you didn't run into her. 1889 01:20:54,300 --> 01:20:56,100 She went over to Mr. Norton's house. 1890 01:20:56,936 --> 01:20:57,769 - Oh. 1891 01:20:59,530 --> 01:21:02,460 - Did you want to see her about something important? 1892 01:21:02,460 --> 01:21:04,483 - Yeah, well, no, it'll wait. 1893 01:21:06,486 --> 01:21:07,820 Say he's a nice man, isn't he? 1894 01:21:07,820 --> 01:21:09,110 Mr. Norton, I mean. 1895 01:21:10,390 --> 01:21:12,063 He's done a lot for the... 1896 01:21:18,800 --> 01:21:21,763 Say, my coat's pretty wet. 1897 01:21:21,763 --> 01:21:23,753 I'm afraid I might have wet the couch a little. 1898 01:21:29,573 --> 01:21:31,797 I'll I guess I'll see her at the convention later. 1899 01:21:31,797 --> 01:21:35,068 - Yes of course, I'll see that she gets the flowers. 1900 01:21:35,068 --> 01:21:35,901 - Thanks. 1901 01:21:35,901 --> 01:21:38,243 Good night, Mrs. Mitchell. - Good night, John. 1902 01:21:44,863 --> 01:21:49,196 - Say Mrs. Mitchell I'm kind of glad Ann isn't here. 1903 01:21:51,726 --> 01:21:56,150 You see, I came over here hoping to see her alone 1904 01:21:56,150 --> 01:21:59,890 and kind of hoping I wouldn't too you know what I mean? 1905 01:21:59,890 --> 01:22:02,513 There was something I wanted to talk to her about. 1906 01:22:05,740 --> 01:22:07,413 Well it can wait, I guess. 1907 01:22:09,230 --> 01:22:10,983 - Good night. - Good night, John. 1908 01:22:15,154 --> 01:22:18,780 - Say look Mrs. Mitchell, have you ever been married? 1909 01:22:18,780 --> 01:22:21,000 Well, sure you have, gosh. 1910 01:22:21,000 --> 01:22:22,000 That's pretty silly. 1911 01:22:23,490 --> 01:22:25,790 Well I guess you must think I'm kind of batty. 1912 01:22:27,475 --> 01:22:30,013 Well I guess I better be going at that. 1913 01:22:31,920 --> 01:22:35,753 - John, my husband said, 1914 01:22:35,753 --> 01:22:37,587 "I love you, will you marry me?" 1915 01:22:38,440 --> 01:22:39,273 - He did? 1916 01:22:40,650 --> 01:22:41,890 - What happened? 1917 01:22:41,890 --> 01:22:42,727 - I married him. 1918 01:22:44,520 --> 01:22:46,951 - Yeah, that's what I mean, see? 1919 01:22:46,951 --> 01:22:48,401 It was easy as all that, huh? 1920 01:22:50,300 --> 01:22:51,813 Yeah, but look Mrs. Mitchell. 1921 01:22:53,210 --> 01:22:56,200 You know I love Ann, and it's gonna be awfully hard 1922 01:22:56,200 --> 01:23:01,200 for me to say it 'cause well you know she's so wonderful 1923 01:23:01,600 --> 01:23:04,813 and well the best I ever was was a bush league pitcher. 1924 01:23:06,540 --> 01:23:07,643 And you know I think she's in love 1925 01:23:07,643 --> 01:23:11,120 with another man, the one she made up. 1926 01:23:11,120 --> 01:23:12,593 You know, the real John Doe. 1927 01:23:13,605 --> 01:23:16,510 Well that's pretty tough competition. 1928 01:23:16,510 --> 01:23:18,030 I bet he'd know how to say it alright. 1929 01:23:18,030 --> 01:23:22,433 But me, I get up to it and around and in back of it, 1930 01:23:22,433 --> 01:23:25,060 but I never get right to it. 1931 01:23:25,060 --> 01:23:26,810 You know what I mean? 1932 01:23:26,810 --> 01:23:28,950 So the only chance I've got is, 1933 01:23:28,950 --> 01:23:32,200 well, if somebody could kind of give her a warning. 1934 01:23:32,200 --> 01:23:34,733 Sort of prepare her for the shock? 1935 01:23:36,180 --> 01:23:37,880 - You mean you'd like me to do it? 1936 01:23:39,520 --> 01:23:43,273 - Well, I was thinking, yeah sort of break the ice. 1937 01:23:45,291 --> 01:23:46,541 - Of course I will, John. 1938 01:23:50,131 --> 01:23:51,481 - Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell. 1939 01:23:53,092 --> 01:23:53,942 Hey, you're okay. 1940 01:24:06,420 --> 01:24:07,560 - This John Doe meeting is gonna 1941 01:24:07,560 --> 01:24:09,232 be one of the biggest things ever happened. 1942 01:24:09,232 --> 01:24:10,065 - Is that so? 1943 01:24:10,065 --> 01:24:12,500 - Why they're coming from all over, trains, boxcars, wagons. 1944 01:24:12,500 --> 01:24:13,870 Look out! 1945 01:24:13,870 --> 01:24:15,670 - Hello, bodyguards, hey have your dinner yet? 1946 01:24:15,670 --> 01:24:17,310 - Not yet. - Oh that's all right. 1947 01:24:17,310 --> 01:24:18,430 - No, go and have dinner. 1948 01:24:18,430 --> 01:24:19,563 - Wait a minute, John. 1949 01:24:24,460 --> 01:24:27,110 - Hello, Mr. Connell. - How are you, John? 1950 01:24:27,110 --> 01:24:29,363 John, I want to have a little talk with you. 1951 01:24:31,380 --> 01:24:32,213 What's the matter? 1952 01:24:32,213 --> 01:24:33,294 Are you falling? 1953 01:24:33,294 --> 01:24:34,560 Come on. 1954 01:24:34,560 --> 01:24:36,800 - Hey, Boss. - Oh, quiet, quiet, quiet. 1955 01:24:36,800 --> 01:24:38,697 So tell me something, did you read 1956 01:24:38,697 --> 01:24:40,720 the speech you're going to make tonight? 1957 01:24:40,720 --> 01:24:42,590 - No, I never read the speeches before I make them. 1958 01:24:42,590 --> 01:24:44,110 I get more of a kick out of it that way. 1959 01:24:44,110 --> 01:24:46,587 - Uh-huh, it's just exactly what I thought. 1960 01:24:46,587 --> 01:24:48,040 Beany, go on down to the office, 1961 01:24:48,040 --> 01:24:48,873 tell Pop to give you the speech. 1962 01:24:48,873 --> 01:24:50,400 There's a copy on my desk. 1963 01:24:50,400 --> 01:24:52,160 - Gee wiz boss, you know Mr. Norton 1964 01:24:52,160 --> 01:24:54,232 told me not to leave him, even for a minute. 1965 01:24:54,232 --> 01:24:55,065 - Go on, go on, go on. 1966 01:24:55,065 --> 01:24:57,533 We'll be at Jim's Bar, up the street. 1967 01:24:58,430 --> 01:25:00,450 You're a nice guy, John. 1968 01:25:00,450 --> 01:25:04,480 I like you, you're gentle. 1969 01:25:04,480 --> 01:25:05,880 I always like gentle people. 1970 01:25:07,200 --> 01:25:09,640 Me, I'm hard. 1971 01:25:09,640 --> 01:25:10,763 Hard and tough. 1972 01:25:11,840 --> 01:25:13,727 I got no use for hard people. 1973 01:25:15,510 --> 01:25:17,300 Gotta be gentle to suit me. 1974 01:25:21,470 --> 01:25:22,803 Like you, for instance. 1975 01:25:30,540 --> 01:25:31,373 Yep, I'm hard. 1976 01:25:31,373 --> 01:25:34,060 But you want to know something? 1977 01:25:34,060 --> 01:25:35,797 I've got a weakness. 1978 01:25:35,797 --> 01:25:37,542 You'd never guess that would you? 1979 01:25:37,542 --> 01:25:39,365 Well, I have. 1980 01:25:39,365 --> 01:25:41,661 Wanna know what it is? 1981 01:25:41,661 --> 01:25:43,107 The Star Spangled Banner. 1982 01:25:44,310 --> 01:25:46,250 Screwy, huh? 1983 01:25:46,250 --> 01:25:47,740 Maybe it is. 1984 01:25:47,740 --> 01:25:51,900 Play The Star Spangled Banner and I'm a sucker for it. 1985 01:25:51,900 --> 01:25:53,998 Always gets me right here. 1986 01:25:53,998 --> 01:25:55,492 You know what I mean? 1987 01:25:55,492 --> 01:25:58,077 - Yeah, it gets me right back here. 1988 01:25:58,077 --> 01:25:58,910 - Oh, back there, huh? 1989 01:26:00,030 --> 01:26:02,733 Well, every man to his own taste. 1990 01:26:06,099 --> 01:26:11,099 You weren't old enough for the world war were you then? 1991 01:26:11,965 --> 01:26:14,139 No, no of course not. 1992 01:26:14,139 --> 01:26:15,639 You must have been just a kid. 1993 01:26:16,990 --> 01:26:17,823 I was. 1994 01:26:19,280 --> 01:26:24,053 I was just ripe and raring to go. 1995 01:26:25,167 --> 01:26:28,330 Know what my old man did when I joined up? 1996 01:26:28,330 --> 01:26:29,180 He joined up too. 1997 01:26:30,460 --> 01:26:31,393 Got to be a sergeant. 1998 01:26:31,393 --> 01:26:33,327 And here's a kick for you. 1999 01:26:34,200 --> 01:26:35,550 We were in the same outfit. 2000 01:26:36,664 --> 01:26:37,581 Funny, huh? 2001 01:26:43,447 --> 01:26:45,114 He was killed, John. 2002 01:26:47,580 --> 01:26:49,140 I saw him get it. 2003 01:26:51,230 --> 01:26:54,437 I was right there and saw it with my own eyes. 2004 01:27:00,090 --> 01:27:02,513 Me, I came out without a scratch. 2005 01:27:04,600 --> 01:27:06,893 That is, excepting my ulcers. 2006 01:27:12,270 --> 01:27:15,023 I should be drinking milk, you know this stuff is poison. 2007 01:27:16,116 --> 01:27:17,033 Hey, Jimmy. 2008 01:27:17,890 --> 01:27:19,062 - [Jim] Yes, Mr. Connell? 2009 01:27:19,062 --> 01:27:23,357 - What do you say, huh? - All right. 2010 01:27:23,357 --> 01:27:26,237 - Yep, I'm a sucker for this country. 2011 01:27:26,237 --> 01:27:27,984 I'm a sucker for The Star Spangled Banner 2012 01:27:27,984 --> 01:27:30,000 and I'm a sucker for this country. 2013 01:27:30,000 --> 01:27:32,684 I like what we got here. 2014 01:27:32,684 --> 01:27:33,553 I like it. 2015 01:27:35,300 --> 01:27:38,960 A guy can say what he wants and do what he wants without 2016 01:27:38,960 --> 01:27:41,540 having a bayonet shoved through his belly. 2017 01:27:41,540 --> 01:27:42,590 And that's all right. 2018 01:27:43,720 --> 01:27:45,267 - You betcha. - Yeah. 2019 01:27:45,267 --> 01:27:49,319 And we don't anybody coming around changing that, do we? 2020 01:27:49,319 --> 01:27:50,986 - No, sir. - No, sir. 2021 01:27:51,850 --> 01:27:56,850 When they do, I get mad, I get boiling mad. 2022 01:27:58,241 --> 01:27:59,450 Right now, I'm sizzling. 2023 01:28:01,940 --> 01:28:05,263 I get mad for a lot of other guys besides myself. 2024 01:28:06,550 --> 01:28:08,883 I get mad for a guy named Washington. 2025 01:28:10,327 --> 01:28:13,950 And a guy named Jefferson and Lincoln. 2026 01:28:15,030 --> 01:28:16,463 Lighthouses, John. 2027 01:28:17,930 --> 01:28:20,573 Lighthouses in a foggy world. 2028 01:28:23,138 --> 01:28:25,322 You know what I mean? 2029 01:28:25,322 --> 01:28:26,655 - Yeah, you bet. 2030 01:28:27,980 --> 01:28:28,813 - Listen, pal. 2031 01:28:29,906 --> 01:28:33,100 This fifth column stuff is pretty rotten, isn't it? 2032 01:28:33,100 --> 01:28:35,478 - Yeah, it certainly is. 2033 01:28:35,478 --> 01:28:36,934 - And you'd feel like an awful sucker 2034 01:28:36,934 --> 01:28:38,530 if you found yourself marching 2035 01:28:38,530 --> 01:28:40,323 right in the middle of it, wouldn't you? 2036 01:28:40,323 --> 01:28:45,323 You, of course you wouldn't know it because you're gentle. 2037 01:28:45,475 --> 01:28:47,737 But that's what you're doing. 2038 01:28:47,737 --> 01:28:50,617 You're mixed up with a skunk, my boy. 2039 01:28:51,830 --> 01:28:54,393 A no good, dangerous skunk. 2040 01:28:57,870 --> 01:29:00,470 - You're not talking about Mr. Norton are you? 2041 01:29:00,470 --> 01:29:03,143 - I'm not talking about his grandfather's pet poodle. 2042 01:29:07,501 --> 01:29:09,450 - You must be wrong, Mr. Connell. 2043 01:29:09,450 --> 01:29:11,600 He's been marvelous about the John Doe Clubs. 2044 01:29:11,600 --> 01:29:13,910 - Yeah. (laughing) 2045 01:29:13,910 --> 01:29:16,703 Say, you're sold on this John Doe idea? 2046 01:29:17,684 --> 01:29:18,517 - Sure. 2047 01:29:18,517 --> 01:29:20,615 - Yeah sure, I don't blame you, sure. 2048 01:29:20,615 --> 01:29:24,750 It's a beautiful miracle, a miracle that can only happen 2049 01:29:24,750 --> 01:29:29,113 right here in the good old USA, and I think it's terrific. 2050 01:29:29,113 --> 01:29:30,640 What do you think of that? 2051 01:29:30,640 --> 01:29:34,873 Me, hard-boiled Connell, and I think it's plenty terrific. 2052 01:29:36,470 --> 01:29:37,310 Alright. 2053 01:29:37,310 --> 01:29:40,270 Now supposing a certain unmentionable worm, 2054 01:29:40,270 --> 01:29:43,200 who's initials are D.B., 2055 01:29:43,200 --> 01:29:45,190 was trying to use that to shove 2056 01:29:45,190 --> 01:29:47,680 his way into the White House. 2057 01:29:47,680 --> 01:29:49,703 So he could put the screws on. 2058 01:29:50,640 --> 01:29:54,263 So he could turn out the lights in those lighthouses. 2059 01:29:57,830 --> 01:29:59,460 What would you say about that? 2060 01:30:00,672 --> 01:30:01,505 - Nobody's gonna do that Mr. Connell. 2061 01:30:02,993 --> 01:30:06,210 They can't use the John Doe Clubs for politics. 2062 01:30:06,210 --> 01:30:08,010 That's the main idea. - Is that so? 2063 01:30:09,060 --> 01:30:10,780 Then what's a big political boss 2064 01:30:10,780 --> 01:30:12,287 like Hammett doing in town? 2065 01:30:12,287 --> 01:30:14,857 And a labor leader like Bennett. 2066 01:30:14,857 --> 01:30:15,690 And lots of other big shots that 2067 01:30:15,690 --> 01:30:18,068 are up at D.B.'s house right now. 2068 01:30:18,068 --> 01:30:20,003 Wolves, John, wolves. 2069 01:30:20,840 --> 01:30:22,763 Waiting to cut up the John Does. 2070 01:30:24,770 --> 01:30:25,640 Wait till you get a gander 2071 01:30:25,640 --> 01:30:27,640 at that speech you're gonna make tonight. 2072 01:30:27,640 --> 01:30:28,800 - You're all wet. 2073 01:30:28,800 --> 01:30:30,090 Miss Mitchell writes those speeches 2074 01:30:30,090 --> 01:30:32,130 and nobody can make her write that kind of stuff. 2075 01:30:32,130 --> 01:30:33,493 - They can't huh? 2076 01:30:33,493 --> 01:30:36,660 Who do you think writes 'em, my aunt Emma? 2077 01:30:36,660 --> 01:30:38,630 I know she writes them and gets 2078 01:30:38,630 --> 01:30:40,890 a big bonus for doing them, too. 2079 01:30:40,890 --> 01:30:43,700 A mink coat and diamond bracelet. 2080 01:30:43,700 --> 01:30:45,571 Don't write 'em? 2081 01:30:45,571 --> 01:30:47,170 Why that gold-grabbing dame 2082 01:30:47,170 --> 01:30:48,600 would double cross her own mother 2083 01:30:48,600 --> 01:30:50,920 for a handful of Chinese yams. 2084 01:30:50,920 --> 01:30:51,753 - Shut up. 2085 01:30:53,220 --> 01:30:55,470 If you weren't drunk, I'd-- 2086 01:30:55,470 --> 01:30:56,363 - Hey, Boss. 2087 01:30:57,410 --> 01:30:59,310 Here's the speech, Boss. 2088 01:30:59,310 --> 01:31:00,850 Hey. 2089 01:31:00,850 --> 01:31:03,630 - Go on and read it John, and then start sockin'. 2090 01:31:05,950 --> 01:31:07,893 - Hey wait a minute, Mr. Doe. 2091 01:31:09,623 --> 01:31:11,090 - Jimmy. - Yes, sir. 2092 01:31:11,090 --> 01:31:13,113 - Better bring me a glass of milk. 2093 01:31:15,353 --> 01:31:17,030 I'm smoking too much. 2094 01:31:21,220 --> 01:31:23,100 - Yes, Charlie, everything all set? 2095 01:31:23,100 --> 01:31:23,933 Fine. 2096 01:31:23,933 --> 01:31:25,662 John Doe been take care of? 2097 01:31:25,662 --> 01:31:26,960 Good. 2098 01:31:26,960 --> 01:31:30,030 How many people will be there, 15,000? 2099 01:31:30,030 --> 01:31:32,330 Oh my, that's fine. 2100 01:31:32,330 --> 01:31:33,510 Now listen, Charlie. 2101 01:31:33,510 --> 01:31:35,554 As soon as John Doe stops talking about me 2102 01:31:35,554 --> 01:31:37,350 I want you to start that demonstration, 2103 01:31:37,350 --> 01:31:38,617 and make it a big one you understand? 2104 01:31:38,617 --> 01:31:40,660 - Don't worry about that, D.B. my boys are there. 2105 01:31:40,660 --> 01:31:41,920 They'll take care of it. 2106 01:31:41,920 --> 01:31:42,866 - What? 2107 01:31:42,866 --> 01:31:45,413 Yes, I'll be there 15 minutes after I get your call. 2108 01:31:46,630 --> 01:31:48,480 - [Man] Why, Mr. Doe. 2109 01:31:48,480 --> 01:31:49,718 - Where are they? 2110 01:31:49,718 --> 01:31:51,018 - In the dining room, sir. 2111 01:31:56,320 --> 01:31:57,630 - Gentlemen, I think we're about 2112 01:31:57,630 --> 01:31:59,380 ready to throw that great big bombshell. 2113 01:31:59,380 --> 01:32:01,080 - [Man] Yeah, it's about time. 2114 01:32:01,080 --> 01:32:02,760 Even a conservative estimate shows 2115 01:32:02,760 --> 01:32:04,730 that we can count on anywhere between 10 2116 01:32:04,730 --> 01:32:07,090 and 20 million John Doe votes. 2117 01:32:07,090 --> 01:32:10,507 Add that to the labor vote that Mr. Bennett will throw in. 2118 01:32:10,507 --> 01:32:12,070 And the votes controlled by Mr. Hammett 2119 01:32:12,070 --> 01:32:14,200 and the rest of you gentlemen in your own territories 2120 01:32:14,200 --> 01:32:15,170 and nothing can stop us. 2121 01:32:15,170 --> 01:32:16,929 - As I said before, I'm with you, 2122 01:32:16,929 --> 01:32:19,610 providing you can guarantee the John Doe vote. 2123 01:32:19,610 --> 01:32:20,767 - [D.B] Don't worry about that. 2124 01:32:20,767 --> 01:32:23,330 - You can count on me, on one condition. 2125 01:32:23,330 --> 01:32:25,080 Little Bennett's gotta be taken care of. 2126 01:32:25,080 --> 01:32:25,913 - [D.B.] Didn't I tell you that everybody 2127 01:32:25,913 --> 01:32:27,910 in this room would be taken care of? 2128 01:32:27,910 --> 01:32:30,210 My agreement with you gentlemen stands. 2129 01:32:30,210 --> 01:32:32,320 - I'm with you, D.B., but I still think 2130 01:32:32,320 --> 01:32:34,390 it's a very daring thing we're attempting. 2131 01:32:34,390 --> 01:32:36,550 - These are daring times, Mr. Barrington. 2132 01:32:36,550 --> 01:32:38,640 We're coming to a new order of things. 2133 01:32:38,640 --> 01:32:40,349 There's too much talk been going in this country. 2134 01:32:40,349 --> 01:32:41,182 - That's right. 2135 01:32:41,182 --> 01:32:42,015 - [D.B] Too many concessions have been made. 2136 01:32:42,015 --> 01:32:42,848 - [Man] True. 2137 01:32:42,848 --> 01:32:44,010 - What the American people need is an iron hand. 2138 01:32:44,010 --> 01:32:45,320 - You're right D.B. - That's true. 2139 01:32:45,320 --> 01:32:46,700 - You're quite right, D.B. 2140 01:32:46,700 --> 01:32:48,783 Quite right. - Discipline. 2141 01:32:49,857 --> 01:32:53,313 And now may I offer a little toast to Miss Ann Mitchell, 2142 01:32:54,466 --> 01:32:56,150 the brilliant and beautiful lady 2143 01:32:56,150 --> 01:32:57,970 who is responsible for all this. 2144 01:32:57,970 --> 01:32:59,320 - [Everyone] Miss Mitchell. 2145 01:33:00,211 --> 01:33:02,672 - Mr. Norton, I'd like to talk to you alone for a minute. 2146 01:33:02,672 --> 01:33:05,250 - Oh, Miss Mitchell has something to say to us. 2147 01:33:05,250 --> 01:33:06,667 - Speech, speech. 2148 01:33:11,504 --> 01:33:12,337 - Hello. 2149 01:33:20,888 --> 01:33:22,136 - John, I'm so glad to see you. 2150 01:33:22,136 --> 01:33:25,450 I was terribly worried. - Did you write this? 2151 01:33:25,450 --> 01:33:29,468 - Yes I did, John, but I had no idea what was going on. 2152 01:33:29,468 --> 01:33:30,968 - You didn't? - No. 2153 01:33:33,300 --> 01:33:35,350 - That's a swell bracelet you're wearing. 2154 01:33:39,440 --> 01:33:41,233 - John, why aren't you at the convention? 2155 01:33:58,310 --> 01:33:59,143 Is there anything wrong? 2156 01:33:59,143 --> 01:34:00,653 - No, no, nothing's wrong. 2157 01:34:01,540 --> 01:34:02,503 Everything's fine. 2158 01:34:03,980 --> 01:34:06,370 So there's going to be a new order of things, huh? 2159 01:34:06,370 --> 01:34:07,430 Everybody's gonna cut himself 2160 01:34:07,430 --> 01:34:09,720 a nice fat slice of the John Does eh? 2161 01:34:11,040 --> 01:34:13,260 You forgot one detail, Mr. Big Shot. 2162 01:34:13,260 --> 01:34:16,640 You forgot me, the prize stooge of the world. 2163 01:34:16,640 --> 01:34:18,253 Why if you or anybody thinks 2164 01:34:18,253 --> 01:34:19,887 he's gonna use the John Doe Clubs 2165 01:34:19,887 --> 01:34:21,130 for his own rotten purpose 2166 01:34:21,130 --> 01:34:23,050 he's going to have to do it over my dead body. 2167 01:34:23,050 --> 01:34:24,980 - Now hold on a minute, young man. 2168 01:34:24,980 --> 01:34:27,150 Hold on, that's rather big talk. 2169 01:34:27,150 --> 01:34:30,000 I started the John Doe Clubs with my money 2170 01:34:30,000 --> 01:34:32,430 and I'll decide whether or not they're being properly used. 2171 01:34:32,430 --> 01:34:33,263 - No, you won't. 2172 01:34:33,263 --> 01:34:34,610 You're through deciding anything. 2173 01:34:34,610 --> 01:34:37,370 And what's more, I'm going down to that convention 2174 01:34:37,370 --> 01:34:39,633 and I'm gonna tell those people exactly what you 2175 01:34:39,633 --> 01:34:41,670 and all your fine feathered friends here 2176 01:34:41,670 --> 01:34:43,840 are trying to cook up for them. 2177 01:34:43,840 --> 01:34:46,203 And I'm gonna say it in my own words this time. 2178 01:34:48,625 --> 01:34:50,893 - Stop him D.B. (angry chattering) 2179 01:34:50,893 --> 01:34:52,200 - [Man] He'll ruin us, D.B.. 2180 01:34:52,200 --> 01:34:54,080 - Wait a minute, wait a minute fella. 2181 01:34:54,080 --> 01:34:55,727 My uncle wants to talk to you. 2182 01:34:55,727 --> 01:34:57,710 - Listen to me, my son. 2183 01:34:57,710 --> 01:34:59,860 Before you lose your head completely, 2184 01:34:59,860 --> 01:35:02,710 may I remind you that I picked you up out of the gutter, 2185 01:35:02,710 --> 01:35:05,000 and I can throw you right back there again. 2186 01:35:05,000 --> 01:35:07,760 You've got a nerve accusing people of things. 2187 01:35:07,760 --> 01:35:09,470 These gentlemen and I know what's best 2188 01:35:09,470 --> 01:35:10,980 for the John Does of America 2189 01:35:10,980 --> 01:35:13,083 regardless of what tramps like you think. 2190 01:35:14,630 --> 01:35:16,220 Get off that righteous horse of yours 2191 01:35:16,220 --> 01:35:17,810 and come to your senses. 2192 01:35:17,810 --> 01:35:18,890 You're the fake. 2193 01:35:18,890 --> 01:35:20,780 We believe in what we're doing. 2194 01:35:20,780 --> 01:35:23,100 You're the one that was paid the 30 pieces of silver. 2195 01:35:23,100 --> 01:35:23,933 Have you forgotten that? 2196 01:35:23,933 --> 01:35:25,380 Well, I haven't. 2197 01:35:25,380 --> 01:35:28,060 You're a fake, John Doe, and I can prove it. 2198 01:35:28,060 --> 01:35:29,378 You're the big hero that's supposed 2199 01:35:29,378 --> 01:35:31,970 to jump off tall buildings and things? 2200 01:35:31,970 --> 01:35:32,950 You remember? 2201 01:35:32,950 --> 01:35:34,740 What do you suppose your precious John Does 2202 01:35:34,740 --> 01:35:36,530 will say when they find out that you never 2203 01:35:36,530 --> 01:35:37,940 had any intention of doing it? 2204 01:35:37,940 --> 01:35:39,900 That you were paid to say so? 2205 01:35:39,900 --> 01:35:42,600 You're lucky they don't run you out of the country. 2206 01:35:42,600 --> 01:35:44,380 With the newspapers and the radio stations 2207 01:35:44,380 --> 01:35:45,770 that these gentlemen control, 2208 01:35:45,770 --> 01:35:48,220 we can kill the John Doe movement deader than a doornail. 2209 01:35:48,220 --> 01:35:50,620 We'll do it too the moment you step out of line. 2210 01:35:52,410 --> 01:35:54,380 Now if you still want to go that convention 2211 01:35:54,380 --> 01:35:56,843 and shoot your trap off, you go ahead and do it. 2212 01:36:05,080 --> 01:36:07,501 - You mean, you'd try to kill the John Doe movement 2213 01:36:07,501 --> 01:36:10,300 if you can't use it to get what you want? 2214 01:36:10,300 --> 01:36:12,493 - [D.B.] You bet your bottom dollar we would. 2215 01:36:18,940 --> 01:36:20,763 - Well that certainly is a new low. 2216 01:36:22,920 --> 01:36:24,663 I guess I've seen everything now. 2217 01:36:27,070 --> 01:36:29,250 You sit there back with your big cigars 2218 01:36:29,250 --> 01:36:30,430 and think of deliberately killing 2219 01:36:30,430 --> 01:36:33,740 an idea that's made millions of people a little bit happier. 2220 01:36:33,740 --> 01:36:35,680 An idea that's brought thousands of them 2221 01:36:35,680 --> 01:36:37,470 here from all over the country. 2222 01:36:37,470 --> 01:36:40,650 By bus, and by freight and jalopy and on foot 2223 01:36:40,650 --> 01:36:42,080 so they can pass on to each other 2224 01:36:42,080 --> 01:36:44,930 their own simple little experiences. 2225 01:36:44,930 --> 01:36:48,320 Why look, I'm just a mug and I know it, 2226 01:36:48,320 --> 01:36:50,680 but I'm beginning to understand a lot of things. 2227 01:36:50,680 --> 01:36:52,370 Why your types are as old as history. 2228 01:36:52,370 --> 01:36:55,270 If you can't lay your dirty fingers on a decent idea, 2229 01:36:55,270 --> 01:36:56,463 and twist it and squeeze it and stuff it 2230 01:36:56,463 --> 01:36:59,280 into your pocket you slap it down like dogs, 2231 01:36:59,280 --> 01:37:02,050 if you can't eat it, you bury it. 2232 01:37:02,050 --> 01:37:05,060 Why this is the one worthwhile thing that's come along. 2233 01:37:05,060 --> 01:37:06,590 People are finally finding out 2234 01:37:06,590 --> 01:37:08,714 that the guy next door isn't a bad egg. 2235 01:37:08,714 --> 01:37:09,908 That's simple, isn't it? 2236 01:37:09,908 --> 01:37:11,810 And yet a thing like that has got a chance of spreading 2237 01:37:11,810 --> 01:37:14,237 till it touches last doggone human being in the world, 2238 01:37:14,237 --> 01:37:17,140 and you talk about killing it. 2239 01:37:17,140 --> 01:37:19,590 Well, when this fire dies down, what's going to be left? 2240 01:37:19,590 --> 01:37:22,110 More misery, more hunger and more hate. 2241 01:37:22,110 --> 01:37:24,850 And what's to prevent that from starting all over again? 2242 01:37:24,850 --> 01:37:27,450 Nobody knows the answer to that one and certainly not you, 2243 01:37:27,450 --> 01:37:29,970 with those slimy, bollixed up theories you got. 2244 01:37:29,970 --> 01:37:32,290 The John Doe idea may be the answer though. 2245 01:37:32,290 --> 01:37:33,940 It may be the one thing capable 2246 01:37:33,940 --> 01:37:35,100 of saving this cockeyed world, 2247 01:37:35,100 --> 01:37:37,270 yet you sit back there on your fat hulks 2248 01:37:37,270 --> 01:37:39,260 and tell me you'll kill it if you can't use it. 2249 01:37:39,260 --> 01:37:40,670 Well, go ahead and try! 2250 01:37:40,670 --> 01:37:42,940 You couldn't do it in a million years with all your 2251 01:37:42,940 --> 01:37:45,820 radio stations and all your power because it's bigger than 2252 01:37:45,820 --> 01:37:48,160 whether I'm a fake, it's bigger than your ambitions 2253 01:37:48,160 --> 01:37:49,330 and bigger than all the bracelets 2254 01:37:49,330 --> 01:37:50,441 and fur coats in the world. 2255 01:37:50,441 --> 01:37:51,594 - You bet it is, John! 2256 01:37:51,594 --> 01:37:52,427 - And that's exactly what I'm going 2257 01:37:52,427 --> 01:37:54,200 down there to tell those people. 2258 01:37:54,200 --> 01:37:56,617 (applauding) 2259 01:37:57,917 --> 01:37:59,570 - I'm gonna, you ungrateful rat. 2260 01:37:59,570 --> 01:38:00,586 My uncle's been too good to-- 2261 01:38:00,586 --> 01:38:03,340 (thumping) (suspenseful music) 2262 01:38:03,340 --> 01:38:04,997 - He's getting away. (whistle blowing) 2263 01:38:04,997 --> 01:38:06,217 - John! 2264 01:38:06,217 --> 01:38:08,506 - Get me the Bulletin. 2265 01:38:08,506 --> 01:38:09,891 - John. 2266 01:38:09,891 --> 01:38:12,523 - I told you, D.B., you're playing with dynamite. 2267 01:38:14,433 --> 01:38:16,712 - Don't let that girl get away. 2268 01:38:16,712 --> 01:38:18,950 - Before he gets through tonight, he'll ruin us all. 2269 01:38:18,950 --> 01:38:20,420 I'll stop him, I'll stop him cold. 2270 01:38:20,420 --> 01:38:21,699 Don't worry, I've been ready for this. 2271 01:38:21,699 --> 01:38:22,843 - John. 2272 01:38:22,843 --> 01:38:24,537 Oh John, please listen to me. 2273 01:38:24,537 --> 01:38:26,680 Please I can explain everything John. 2274 01:38:26,680 --> 01:38:27,747 I didn't know what they were going to do. 2275 01:38:27,747 --> 01:38:30,053 Let me go with you John. 2276 01:38:30,053 --> 01:38:31,130 John, please. 2277 01:38:31,130 --> 01:38:32,645 - Go ahead, driver, ball park. 2278 01:38:32,645 --> 01:38:34,393 - Let me explain it to you John. 2279 01:38:34,393 --> 01:38:36,163 Please let me go with you. 2280 01:38:36,163 --> 01:38:37,246 Please, John. 2281 01:38:38,293 --> 01:38:40,160 - Mr. Norton wants to see you. 2282 01:38:40,160 --> 01:38:42,090 - Listen to me, Mayor I want you to do as I say. 2283 01:38:42,090 --> 01:38:43,300 I want them both arrested. 2284 01:38:43,300 --> 01:38:44,453 You tell the police department to pick up Connell. 2285 01:38:44,453 --> 01:38:45,612 I've got the girl here. 2286 01:38:45,612 --> 01:38:46,445 - I've got the Bulletin. 2287 01:38:46,445 --> 01:38:47,310 - I don't care what you charge them with. 2288 01:38:47,310 --> 01:38:48,373 If you're worried let them go in the morning, 2289 01:38:48,373 --> 01:38:50,575 but keep them in jail overnight. 2290 01:38:50,575 --> 01:38:51,440 Hello, Bulletin? 2291 01:38:51,440 --> 01:38:52,816 Put Buck Meyer on. 2292 01:38:52,816 --> 01:38:54,608 ♪ With my banjo on my knee ♪ 2293 01:38:54,608 --> 01:38:55,989 ♪ I'm going to Louisiana ♪ 2294 01:38:55,989 --> 01:38:58,115 ♪ My true love for to see ♪ 2295 01:38:58,115 --> 01:39:00,023 ♪ It rained all night the day I left ♪ 2296 01:39:00,023 --> 01:39:01,672 ♪ The weather it was dry ♪ 2297 01:39:01,672 --> 01:39:03,410 ♪ The sun so hot I froze to death ♪ 2298 01:39:03,410 --> 01:39:05,614 ♪ Susanna, don't you cry ♪ 2299 01:39:05,614 --> 01:39:08,986 ♪ Oh Susanna, oh don't you cry for me ♪ 2300 01:39:08,986 --> 01:39:12,890 ♪ I've come from Alabama with my banjo on my knee ♪ 2301 01:39:12,890 --> 01:39:16,285 ♪ Oh Susanna, oh don't you cry for me ♪ 2302 01:39:16,285 --> 01:39:19,929 ♪ I've come from Alabama with my banjo on my knee ♪ 2303 01:39:19,929 --> 01:39:23,342 ♪ I came from Alabama with my banjo on my knee ♪ 2304 01:39:23,342 --> 01:39:27,060 ♪ I'm going to Louisiana, my true love for to see ♪ 2305 01:39:27,060 --> 01:39:28,850 ♪ It rained all night the day I left ♪ 2306 01:39:28,850 --> 01:39:31,100 (cheering) 2307 01:39:43,323 --> 01:39:45,670 - Three cheers for John Doe. 2308 01:39:45,670 --> 01:39:48,420 - [Crowd] Hurray, hurray, hurray. 2309 01:39:53,020 --> 01:39:57,081 ♪ My country 'tis of thee ♪ 2310 01:39:57,081 --> 01:40:01,664 ♪ Sweet land of liberty of thee I sing ♪ 2311 01:40:07,275 --> 01:40:12,088 ♪ Land where my fathers died ♪ 2312 01:40:12,088 --> 01:40:17,025 ♪ Land of the pilgrims' pride ♪ 2313 01:40:17,025 --> 01:40:21,942 ♪ From every mountainside let freedom ring ♪ 2314 01:40:29,358 --> 01:40:31,608 (cheering) 2315 01:40:38,460 --> 01:40:39,963 - Ladies and gentlemen. 2316 01:40:39,963 --> 01:40:41,546 - One moment, John. 2317 01:40:42,528 --> 01:40:45,111 We'll begin with a soft prayer. 2318 01:40:48,098 --> 01:40:49,265 Quiet, please. 2319 01:40:50,711 --> 01:40:53,597 Ladies and gentlemen, let's have a moment 2320 01:40:53,597 --> 01:40:56,830 of silent prayer for the John Does 2321 01:40:56,830 --> 01:41:01,830 all over the world, many of whom are homeless and hungry. 2322 01:41:04,200 --> 01:41:05,330 Rise, please. 2323 01:41:06,985 --> 01:41:08,235 Everybody rise. 2324 01:41:36,612 --> 01:41:39,695 (frantic chattering) 2325 01:41:59,843 --> 01:42:00,693 - [Radio Broadcaster] News boys, hundreds 2326 01:42:00,693 --> 01:42:02,407 of yelling news boys are swarming 2327 01:42:02,407 --> 01:42:03,804 into the crowd like locusts. 2328 01:42:03,804 --> 01:42:05,157 - [Man] They're yelling John Doe's a fake. 2329 01:42:05,157 --> 01:42:05,990 - Fake? 2330 01:42:05,990 --> 01:42:08,907 (angry chattering) 2331 01:42:13,200 --> 01:42:16,283 - [Newspaper Boys] John Doe's a fake! 2332 01:42:18,579 --> 01:42:21,251 - Federal investigation urged by Chamber of Commerce. 2333 01:42:21,251 --> 01:42:22,787 - How could he be a fake? 2334 01:42:22,787 --> 01:42:24,587 - It must be some kind of a gag. 2335 01:42:24,587 --> 01:42:26,587 - A what? - A gag, a gag. 2336 01:42:28,127 --> 01:42:33,127 (whistle blowing) (sirens blaring) 2337 01:42:37,877 --> 01:42:41,086 - Come on, come on step on it. 2338 01:42:41,086 --> 01:42:42,381 Step on it, step on it. 2339 01:42:42,381 --> 01:42:44,112 You all know you're places now so let's get going. 2340 01:42:44,112 --> 01:42:45,164 Wait for the signal. 2341 01:42:45,164 --> 01:42:46,902 - Hey mister will you autograph my balloon? 2342 01:42:46,902 --> 01:42:48,189 - Sure. 2343 01:42:48,189 --> 01:42:51,272 (frantic chattering) 2344 01:42:57,236 --> 01:43:00,712 - Ladies and gentlemen, this is exactly what 2345 01:43:00,712 --> 01:43:04,295 I came down here to tell you about tonight. 2346 01:43:05,176 --> 01:43:07,608 Please, if you all would just be quiet for a few minutes, 2347 01:43:07,608 --> 01:43:10,775 I can explain this whole thing to you. 2348 01:43:11,635 --> 01:43:13,637 As you all know, this paper is published 2349 01:43:13,637 --> 01:43:16,528 by a man by the name of D.B. Norton. 2350 01:43:16,528 --> 01:43:18,538 - [Man] Get back, you. 2351 01:43:18,538 --> 01:43:20,788 - Everybody, wait a minute. 2352 01:43:21,818 --> 01:43:26,816 Wait a minute ladies and gentlemen, my name is D.B. Norton. 2353 01:43:26,816 --> 01:43:28,708 You all know me. 2354 01:43:28,708 --> 01:43:31,230 I accuse this man of being a faker. 2355 01:43:31,230 --> 01:43:32,449 We've been taken for a lot of suckers 2356 01:43:32,449 --> 01:43:34,610 and I'm the biggest of the lot. 2357 01:43:34,610 --> 01:43:36,400 I spent a fortune backing this man 2358 01:43:36,400 --> 01:43:38,380 in what I believed to be a sincere 2359 01:43:38,380 --> 01:43:40,644 and worthy cause just as you all did 2360 01:43:40,644 --> 01:43:43,210 and now I find out it's nothing but a cheap racket, 2361 01:43:43,210 --> 01:43:45,250 cooked up by him and two of my employees 2362 01:43:45,250 --> 01:43:47,420 for the sole purpose of collecting dues 2363 01:43:47,420 --> 01:43:49,172 from John Does all over the country. 2364 01:43:49,172 --> 01:43:50,460 - That's a lie! - It's not a lie. 2365 01:43:50,460 --> 01:43:52,710 Nickel and dimes to stuff into their own pockets. 2366 01:43:52,710 --> 01:43:54,280 You can read all about it in the newspapers there. 2367 01:43:54,280 --> 01:43:55,760 - That's a lie, listen-- 2368 01:43:55,760 --> 01:43:57,360 - Let go of me. - Don't believe-- 2369 01:43:57,360 --> 01:43:59,110 - This man had no intention of jumping off 2370 01:43:59,110 --> 01:44:00,240 the the top of a building. 2371 01:44:00,240 --> 01:44:01,360 He was paid to say so. 2372 01:44:01,360 --> 01:44:02,560 Do you deny that? 2373 01:44:02,560 --> 01:44:04,140 - That's got nothing to do with it. 2374 01:44:04,140 --> 01:44:05,520 - Were you paid or weren't you? 2375 01:44:05,520 --> 01:44:06,550 - Yes, I was paid, but-- 2376 01:44:06,550 --> 01:44:08,100 - And what about the suicide note. 2377 01:44:08,100 --> 01:44:09,328 You didn't write that either. 2378 01:44:09,328 --> 01:44:10,161 - What difference does that make? 2379 01:44:10,161 --> 01:44:11,324 - Did you write it or didn't you? 2380 01:44:11,324 --> 01:44:12,608 - No, I didn't I didn't write it. 2381 01:44:12,608 --> 01:44:13,951 - You bet your life you didn't. 2382 01:44:13,951 --> 01:44:15,794 You look in your papers ladies and gentlemen 2383 01:44:15,794 --> 01:44:17,175 and find you'll find Miss Mitchell's 2384 01:44:17,175 --> 01:44:19,237 signed confession that she was the one who wrote it. 2385 01:44:19,237 --> 01:44:21,307 - Listen folks it's a fact that I didn't write the letter-- 2386 01:44:21,307 --> 01:44:22,140 - Now you see, he admits it. 2387 01:44:22,140 --> 01:44:24,320 You're a fake, John Doe. 2388 01:44:24,320 --> 01:44:27,117 And for what you have done to all these people good people 2389 01:44:27,117 --> 01:44:29,068 they ought to run you out of the country. 2390 01:44:29,068 --> 01:44:30,901 And I hope they do it. 2391 01:44:39,781 --> 01:44:41,947 - [Man] Speak up, John, we believe you. 2392 01:44:41,947 --> 01:44:43,979 - Please listen, folks. 2393 01:44:43,979 --> 01:44:46,580 Now that he's through shooting off his face, 2394 01:44:46,580 --> 01:44:49,119 I got couple of things to tell you about. 2395 01:44:49,119 --> 01:44:50,600 - Come on, the rest of you get in here and riot. 2396 01:44:50,600 --> 01:44:51,800 Break this crowd up, come on. 2397 01:44:51,800 --> 01:44:53,800 - I'm sorry folks, but we can't hear him anymore. 2398 01:44:53,800 --> 01:44:56,580 Something's gone wrong with the loudspeakers. 2399 01:44:56,580 --> 01:44:57,720 - Doe's a fake. 2400 01:44:57,720 --> 01:44:58,553 Boo! 2401 01:44:59,540 --> 01:45:00,786 - Please, they can't hear me. 2402 01:45:00,786 --> 01:45:03,014 - Boo! (yelling) 2403 01:45:03,014 --> 01:45:04,950 - This thing's not working. 2404 01:45:04,950 --> 01:45:06,000 Ladies and gentlemen. 2405 01:45:07,156 --> 01:45:11,406 (booing) (yelling) 2406 01:45:24,290 --> 01:45:26,490 This thing's bigger than whether I'm a fake. 2407 01:45:28,630 --> 01:45:31,243 Look Bert, you believe me, don't ya? 2408 01:45:32,106 --> 01:45:34,270 - Sure, I believe you. 2409 01:45:34,270 --> 01:45:38,640 Walking my legs off picking up 5,000 signatures for a phony. 2410 01:45:38,640 --> 01:45:40,080 There you are, Mr. Doe. 2411 01:45:40,080 --> 01:45:43,500 5,000 names asking you not to jump off any roof. 2412 01:45:43,500 --> 01:45:44,764 - Makes no difference, Bert. 2413 01:45:44,764 --> 01:45:45,940 The idea's still good. 2414 01:45:45,940 --> 01:45:47,214 We don't have to give up our club. 2415 01:45:47,214 --> 01:45:49,972 - Yeah, well you can have it. 2416 01:45:49,972 --> 01:45:51,467 (shouting) 2417 01:45:51,467 --> 01:45:52,580 - They're starting to throw things. 2418 01:45:52,580 --> 01:45:53,880 Somebody's going to get hurt. 2419 01:45:53,880 --> 01:45:56,227 I'm afraid it will be John Doe. 2420 01:45:56,227 --> 01:45:57,709 Listen to that mob. 2421 01:45:57,709 --> 01:46:00,221 (shouting) 2422 01:46:00,221 --> 01:46:01,981 - I've got to go to him. 2423 01:46:01,981 --> 01:46:03,476 - Sorry, lady, I can't let you out. 2424 01:46:03,476 --> 01:46:05,171 - Let me go. 2425 01:46:05,171 --> 01:46:07,118 Oh please, please let me go. 2426 01:46:07,118 --> 01:46:08,070 They're crucifying him. 2427 01:46:08,070 --> 01:46:08,924 I can help him. 2428 01:46:08,924 --> 01:46:10,209 - [Man] Sorry sister, we got orders to hold you. 2429 01:46:10,209 --> 01:46:11,042 - Orders from who? 2430 01:46:11,042 --> 01:46:12,476 Can't you see it's a frame up? 2431 01:46:12,476 --> 01:46:13,309 - Ann darling. 2432 01:46:13,309 --> 01:46:15,320 - [Ann] Oh Mother, they won't let me go. 2433 01:46:15,320 --> 01:46:17,690 They won't let me go. 2434 01:46:17,690 --> 01:46:18,673 (shouting) 2435 01:46:18,673 --> 01:46:20,006 - Listen, folks. 2436 01:46:21,072 --> 01:46:23,143 You gotta-- - Back to the jungle you hobo. 2437 01:46:23,143 --> 01:46:25,644 - Just another racket. 2438 01:46:25,644 --> 01:46:26,991 - Stick to your clubs. 2439 01:46:26,991 --> 01:46:30,071 - We've been fed baloney so long we're getting used to it. 2440 01:46:30,071 --> 01:46:32,321 (shouting) 2441 01:46:38,677 --> 01:46:40,760 - The idea is still good. 2442 01:46:42,810 --> 01:46:44,310 Believe me, folks. 2443 01:46:46,962 --> 01:46:50,901 Listen John Does were the hope of the world. 2444 01:46:50,901 --> 01:46:53,651 (angry shouting) 2445 01:47:26,321 --> 01:47:27,154 - [Radio Broadcaster] They just finally managed 2446 01:47:27,154 --> 01:47:28,346 to get him out of the park. 2447 01:47:28,346 --> 01:47:30,515 And if that boy isn't hurt it'll be a miracle. 2448 01:47:30,515 --> 01:47:32,053 Ladies and gentlemen this certainly looks 2449 01:47:32,053 --> 01:47:35,463 like the end of the John Doe movement. 2450 01:47:35,463 --> 01:47:40,296 - Well, boys, chalk up another one to the Pontius Pilates. 2451 01:47:46,592 --> 01:47:49,240 - I should have been there. 2452 01:47:49,240 --> 01:47:50,440 I could have helped him. 2453 01:47:52,703 --> 01:47:54,383 He was so all alone. 2454 01:47:58,104 --> 01:47:58,937 - A lot of us are going to be mighty 2455 01:47:58,937 --> 01:48:00,860 ashamed of ourselves after tonight. 2456 01:48:01,954 --> 01:48:04,504 We certainly didn't give that man much of a chance. 2457 01:48:14,230 --> 01:48:16,193 - [Colonel] Want sore coffee, Long John? 2458 01:48:17,070 --> 01:48:18,707 - No thanks, Colonel. 2459 01:48:26,867 --> 01:48:30,534 (dramatic orchestral music) 2460 01:48:38,127 --> 01:48:39,439 - Fake. - Racketeer. 2461 01:48:39,439 --> 01:48:40,610 - Liar. - Cheat. 2462 01:48:40,610 --> 01:48:43,040 - Impostor. - Why don't you jump? 2463 01:48:43,040 --> 01:48:46,557 - Christmas Eve midnight. (laughing) 2464 01:48:46,557 --> 01:48:48,140 - Goodbye, Mr. Doe. 2465 01:48:48,977 --> 01:48:51,510 You're a wonderful man. 2466 01:48:51,510 --> 01:48:53,843 - And God bless you, my boy. 2467 01:48:54,745 --> 01:48:57,162 - Now get in there and pitch. 2468 01:49:00,082 --> 01:49:02,080 - You're a fake John Doe and I can prove it. 2469 01:49:02,080 --> 01:49:04,440 You're the big hero that's meant to jump 2470 01:49:04,440 --> 01:49:07,380 off tall buildings and things, do you remember? 2471 01:49:07,380 --> 01:49:08,570 What do you suppose your precious 2472 01:49:08,570 --> 01:49:10,540 John Does will say when they find out 2473 01:49:10,540 --> 01:49:12,240 that you never had any intention of doing it? 2474 01:49:12,240 --> 01:49:13,970 That you were paid to say so? 2475 01:49:13,970 --> 01:49:17,134 - [Ann] Christmas Eve, at midnight. (laughing) 2476 01:49:17,134 --> 01:49:22,134 ♪ Silent night, holy night ♪ 2477 01:49:24,903 --> 01:49:29,903 ♪ Shepherds quake at the sight ♪ 2478 01:49:31,988 --> 01:49:36,155 ♪ Glories stream from heaven afar ♪ 2479 01:49:39,284 --> 01:49:40,784 - Merry Christmas. 2480 01:49:42,409 --> 01:49:43,909 - Merry Christmas. 2481 01:49:47,241 --> 01:49:52,241 ♪ Christ, the Savior is born ♪ 2482 01:49:54,912 --> 01:49:58,662 ♪ Christ, the Savior is born ♪ 2483 01:50:04,144 --> 01:50:07,225 (chattering) 2484 01:50:07,225 --> 01:50:09,642 - [Carolers] Merry Christmas. 2485 01:50:10,686 --> 01:50:13,380 - Who, John Doe? 2486 01:50:13,380 --> 01:50:15,810 Is that screwball still around? 2487 01:50:15,810 --> 01:50:17,800 - That dame's been calling all day. 2488 01:50:17,800 --> 01:50:19,330 - Sure, sure, I know. 2489 01:50:19,330 --> 01:50:21,690 Yeah, at midnight, huh? (laughing) 2490 01:50:21,690 --> 01:50:25,783 Okay, lady, we'll have the place surrounded with nets. 2491 01:50:25,783 --> 01:50:27,743 - They're laughing at me. 2492 01:50:33,680 --> 01:50:34,820 - [Man] You're a sick girl, Ann. 2493 01:50:34,820 --> 01:50:36,020 You better take it easy. 2494 01:50:38,730 --> 01:50:40,143 - Who are you calling now? 2495 01:50:41,310 --> 01:50:44,163 You called that number, not 10 minutes ago. 2496 01:50:45,257 --> 01:50:46,753 - Hello. Mr. Connell. 2497 01:50:46,753 --> 01:50:47,586 Have you seen him yet? 2498 01:50:47,586 --> 01:50:49,520 - Now listen, Ann, he can't possibly 2499 01:50:49,520 --> 01:50:51,480 get in without our seeing him. 2500 01:50:51,480 --> 01:50:52,313 I'm watching the side door 2501 01:50:52,313 --> 01:50:54,563 and the Colonel's out front so stop worrying. 2502 01:50:55,724 --> 01:50:57,057 - Oh, thank you. 2503 01:51:04,546 --> 01:51:07,379 - Why Ann. - Ann, don't be foolish. 2504 01:51:11,040 --> 01:51:13,417 - If this isn't the craziest, the battiest, 2505 01:51:13,417 --> 01:51:15,590 the looniest wild goose chase I ever heard of. 2506 01:51:15,590 --> 01:51:16,423 - Oh shut up, Bert. 2507 01:51:16,423 --> 01:51:17,500 Sourpuss is right. 2508 01:51:17,500 --> 01:51:19,430 - Yeah well if he is, I'm a banana split. 2509 01:51:19,430 --> 01:51:21,490 - That man's gonna be on that roof. 2510 01:51:21,490 --> 01:51:23,145 Don't ask me how I know I just know 2511 01:51:23,145 --> 01:51:24,364 and you know it as well as you do. 2512 01:51:24,364 --> 01:51:26,870 - Sure, sure I'd like to believe in fairy tales, 2513 01:51:26,870 --> 01:51:28,870 but a guy that's a fake isn't gonna jump off any roof. 2514 01:51:28,870 --> 01:51:30,130 - I don't think he was a fake. 2515 01:51:30,130 --> 01:51:31,550 Not with that face. 2516 01:51:31,550 --> 01:51:33,490 At any rate what he stood for wasn't a fake. 2517 01:51:33,490 --> 01:51:35,063 - Okay, honey, okay. 2518 01:51:41,586 --> 01:51:44,586 (humming musically) 2519 01:51:53,820 --> 01:51:56,247 - Elevators ain't runnin'. 2520 01:51:56,247 --> 01:51:57,080 - Colonel. 2521 01:51:57,080 --> 01:51:58,802 - [Colonel] You should've got out of bed Miss. 2522 01:51:58,802 --> 01:51:59,899 - Has he been here? 2523 01:51:59,899 --> 01:52:01,159 - No. - Have you seen him? 2524 01:52:01,159 --> 01:52:02,310 - Haven't seen him for a week. 2525 01:52:02,310 --> 01:52:03,143 - Where's Connell? 2526 01:52:03,143 --> 01:52:04,270 - He's watching the other door. 2527 01:52:04,270 --> 01:52:06,463 - Oh, you're swell. 2528 01:52:07,787 --> 01:52:08,620 Oh. 2529 01:52:11,910 --> 01:52:13,230 - No sense in going up there. 2530 01:52:13,230 --> 01:52:14,210 I've been here for hours. 2531 01:52:14,210 --> 01:52:15,043 He ain't here. 2532 01:52:15,043 --> 01:52:16,320 - [Ann] Let me go, will ya? 2533 01:52:20,510 --> 01:52:23,293 - Now that's crazy, it's 14 floors. 2534 01:53:06,464 --> 01:53:08,210 - It's as far as the elevator goes. 2535 01:53:08,210 --> 01:53:09,863 We gotta walk up to the tower. 2536 01:54:00,703 --> 01:54:02,810 - That tramp is probably full of Christmas cheer 2537 01:54:02,810 --> 01:54:04,310 and asleep in some flophouse. 2538 01:54:04,310 --> 01:54:06,660 - [Man] Let's go, I've got to decorate my tree. 2539 01:54:11,668 --> 01:54:14,335 (bells chiming) 2540 01:54:18,430 --> 01:54:20,113 - [Man] Well, I give up. 2541 01:54:20,980 --> 01:54:23,270 I don't what gave us the idea 2542 01:54:23,270 --> 01:54:24,740 he'd attempt anything like this. 2543 01:54:24,740 --> 01:54:26,020 - [Man] I guess you're right. 2544 01:54:26,020 --> 01:54:28,733 I'm afraid the joke's on us, let's go. 2545 01:54:28,733 --> 01:54:31,400 - I hope nobody finds out we've been here. 2546 01:56:14,340 --> 01:56:16,240 I wouldn't do that if I were you John. 2547 01:56:28,450 --> 01:56:29,500 It'll do you no good. 2548 01:56:30,587 --> 01:56:34,130 The Mayor has policemen downstairs with instructions 2549 01:56:34,130 --> 01:56:36,560 to remove all marks of identification 2550 01:56:36,560 --> 01:56:37,723 you have on your person. 2551 01:56:39,430 --> 01:56:41,404 You'll be buried in Potter's Field 2552 01:56:41,404 --> 01:56:44,487 and you'll have accomplished nothing. 2553 01:56:53,932 --> 01:56:56,099 - I've taken care of that. 2554 01:56:57,120 --> 01:57:00,103 I've already mailed a copy of this letter to Mr. Connell. 2555 01:57:03,180 --> 01:57:05,120 - John, why don't you forget this foolishness? 2556 01:57:05,120 --> 01:57:06,780 - Stop right where you are, Mr. Norton, 2557 01:57:06,780 --> 01:57:08,880 if you don't want to go overboard with me. 2558 01:57:13,730 --> 01:57:17,360 I'm glad you gentlemen are here. 2559 01:57:17,360 --> 01:57:20,323 You killed the John Doe movement all right, 2560 01:57:21,617 --> 01:57:24,030 but you're gonna see it born all over again. 2561 01:57:31,881 --> 01:57:35,333 Now take a good look, Mr. Norton. 2562 01:57:35,333 --> 01:57:36,166 - John! 2563 01:57:37,143 --> 01:57:37,976 John. 2564 01:57:38,890 --> 01:57:41,064 Oh John, don't do it. 2565 01:57:41,064 --> 01:57:43,850 I love you, I love you darling. 2566 01:57:43,850 --> 01:57:44,783 Oh please. 2567 01:57:45,960 --> 01:57:47,550 Please don't give up. 2568 01:57:47,550 --> 01:57:49,370 We'll start all over again. 2569 01:57:49,370 --> 01:57:51,570 Just you and I, it isn't too late. 2570 01:57:51,570 --> 01:57:53,653 The John Doe movement isn't dead yet. 2571 01:57:55,111 --> 01:57:57,520 You see John it isn't dead or they wouldn't be here. 2572 01:57:57,520 --> 01:57:58,947 It's alive in them. 2573 01:57:58,947 --> 01:58:01,443 They kept it alive by being afraid of it. 2574 01:58:01,443 --> 01:58:03,410 That's why they came up here. 2575 01:58:03,410 --> 01:58:04,583 Oh, darling. 2576 01:58:05,620 --> 01:58:06,720 Sure it should have been killed. 2577 01:58:06,720 --> 01:58:08,049 It was dishonest. 2578 01:58:08,049 --> 01:58:10,060 But we can start clean now. 2579 01:58:10,060 --> 01:58:11,430 Just you and I. 2580 01:58:11,430 --> 01:58:13,630 It'll grow, John, and it'll grow big 2581 01:58:13,630 --> 01:58:15,553 because it'll be honest this time. 2582 01:58:17,050 --> 01:58:22,010 Oh John, if it's worth dying for, it's worth living for. 2583 01:58:22,010 --> 01:58:23,133 Oh please, John. 2584 01:58:24,600 --> 01:58:25,433 Oh. 2585 01:58:27,030 --> 01:58:28,830 Oh please. 2586 01:58:28,830 --> 01:58:31,093 Please God, help me. 2587 01:58:34,003 --> 01:58:35,416 John. 2588 01:58:35,416 --> 01:58:37,050 John, look at me. 2589 01:58:37,050 --> 01:58:39,415 You want to be honest, don't you? 2590 01:58:39,415 --> 01:58:42,580 Well you don't have to die to keep the John Doe idea alive. 2591 01:58:42,580 --> 01:58:44,800 Someone already died for that once. 2592 01:58:44,800 --> 01:58:46,468 The first John Doe. 2593 01:58:46,468 --> 01:58:49,890 And he's kept that idea alive for nearly 2,000 years. 2594 01:58:49,890 --> 01:58:52,570 It was he who kept it alive in them and he'll go on 2595 01:58:52,570 --> 01:58:54,644 keeping it alive forever and always. 2596 01:58:54,644 --> 01:58:56,830 For every John Doe movement these men kill 2597 01:58:56,830 --> 01:58:58,910 a new one will be born. 2598 01:58:58,910 --> 01:59:01,260 That's why those bells are ringing John. 2599 01:59:01,260 --> 01:59:02,630 They're calling to us. 2600 01:59:02,630 --> 01:59:04,470 Not to give up, but to keep on fighting, 2601 01:59:04,470 --> 01:59:05,927 to keep on pitching. 2602 01:59:05,927 --> 01:59:08,350 Oh don't you see, darling? 2603 01:59:08,350 --> 01:59:10,620 This is no time to give up. 2604 01:59:10,620 --> 01:59:12,950 You and I John, we... 2605 01:59:14,020 --> 01:59:15,827 Oh no. 2606 01:59:15,827 --> 01:59:19,320 No, John, if you die, I want to die, too. 2607 01:59:19,320 --> 01:59:20,660 Oh. 2608 01:59:20,660 --> 01:59:22,305 Oh, I love you. (crying) 2609 01:59:22,305 --> 01:59:23,138 Oh John. 2610 01:59:36,560 --> 01:59:39,550 - Mr. Doe, you don't have to... 2611 01:59:40,670 --> 01:59:42,680 We're with you, Mr. Doe. 2612 01:59:42,680 --> 01:59:45,130 We just lost our heads and acted like a mob. 2613 01:59:45,130 --> 01:59:48,712 - What Bert's trying to say is that we need you Mr. Doe. 2614 01:59:48,712 --> 01:59:49,545 There were a lot of us that 2615 01:59:49,545 --> 01:59:51,680 didn't believe what that man said. 2616 01:59:51,680 --> 01:59:52,750 We were going to start up our 2617 01:59:52,750 --> 01:59:55,013 John Doe Club again, whether we saw you or not. 2618 01:59:55,013 --> 01:59:56,480 Weren't we, Bert? 2619 01:59:56,480 --> 01:59:57,313 And there were a lot of others 2620 01:59:57,313 --> 01:59:59,000 that were gonna do the same thing. 2621 01:59:59,000 --> 02:00:00,223 Well, Mr. Sourpuss even got 2622 02:00:00,223 --> 02:00:01,810 a letter from his cousin in Toledo-- 2623 02:00:01,810 --> 02:00:03,390 - [Smithers] I got it right here, Mr. Doe. 2624 02:00:03,390 --> 02:00:06,285 - Only, it'd be a lot easier with you. 2625 02:00:06,285 --> 02:00:07,118 Please. 2626 02:00:09,496 --> 02:00:11,913 Please come with us, Mr. Doe. 2627 02:00:32,597 --> 02:00:36,097 (upbeat orchestral music) 2628 02:00:37,154 --> 02:00:38,987 - Long John. - Mr. Doe. 2629 02:00:40,136 --> 02:00:41,447 Here we'll help you with her. 2630 02:00:41,447 --> 02:00:42,280 She'll be all right. 2631 02:00:42,280 --> 02:00:45,328 - [Man] We'll take her down to the car. 2632 02:00:45,328 --> 02:00:47,061 We gotta car right back down there. 2633 02:00:47,061 --> 02:00:52,052 - There you are, Norton, the people, try and lick that. 2634 02:00:52,052 --> 02:00:55,385 (upbeat dramatic music) 182844

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