All language subtitles for Black Monday s03e06 FIVE.eng

[Wayne]
Previously on Black Monday...

I'm thinking I want Dawn
to manage my career.

I was behind Black Monday.

Twenty minutes ago,
someone confessed

to Black Monday, and they had
a far more credible story.

I just wanted to thank you.

I mean , without you,
I never would've known

about Amerisavings.

You're really going
all-in, huh?

Bought the ring,
closed on the house.

This is the exact street
that I told you

-I always wanted to live on.
-I don't remember that.

-Is that a painting of me?
-Mm-mm, no.

I was fucking shot
in the fucking chest,

and the fucking person
who fucking did it

is still fucking out there,

and I'm the only one
who fucking cares?

You are gonna love your new
FBI-installed security system.

They also suggest
that you get them a copy

of your enemies list ASAP.

I don't have a list
of my enemies.

[laughter]

[line trilling]

-[Yassir] Hello?
-Hey, Yass.

Let's have a boys' night, huh?

Nomi's out of town
visiting a sick aunt.

She's got something
called Pontiac Fever,

but her loss of bowel control
is our gain.

One second, boss, okay?
Hold on.

Hey, there, Dawn.

Uh, that is Mo on the phone

saying he wants
to hang out tonight

because Nomi's out of town
taking care of her sick aunt,

suffering from something
called Pontiac Fever,

whatever the fuck that is.

So what?

You chicks lied to him

about his own fiancée's
album release party?

I didn't lie.
I told Nomi to lie.

So what am I supposed
to tell Mo?

[phone ringing]

Dawn?

Hello, Ms. Management Music,
Dawn Darcy speaking.

Hey, Dawn, are you home?

Oh, Congressman!
Give me good news!

-Dawn!
-What?

So should I tell Mo
that I have Pontiac Fever,

-that it's going around?
-No, dumbass.

Stay away from specifics
and illnesses.

Take it from a master.
Good lies are like bad photos.

As long as they're blurry
and you're not in 'em,

no one gives a fucking shit.

So I am just calling you
to congratulate you

on your full expungement.

That's right, citizen.

Your record is cleaner
than a dog's balls,

so you can go back to plotting
world domination or whatnot.

You really did it?
Oh, wait, shit, shit.

Can you hold?
I know we've had a rough go.

-No, no, no...
-I have to thank you properly.

-A real quick way...
-Just hold on.

-...to thank me would be to...
-One quick second, okay?

-...help me track down Mo...
-[phone beeps]

Dawn--fuck!

-I am so, so sorry.
-Hello.

-Ms. Management Music.
-Just give me one more second.

-Okay? Boss?
-Dawn Darcy speaking.

Hey, Dawn.
Wait, was that Yass?

I could have sworn I heard
Yassir in the background.

Well, you were
just on with him.

It could have
just been some kind

of weird high-tech echo,
you know?

Hi-techos,
the cereal for nerds.

[laughs]
I'm cuckoo for dying alone.

[phone ringing]

-Hello.
-Keith Shenkar-Leighman II.

I need a favor.

Blair Pfaff Georgina,
the first of his name.

I'm actually just running out
to get my kids.

What's up?

Anyway, um, MoMo, uh,
I have to go, okay?

I-I-I'll call you back.

O-okay, but real quick--
do you want

to come
to a Kokomo show tonight?

I mean, Nomi is out of town,
so I know you're not working.

I can't.
I'm...

I'm sick.

Yeah, I've got, um...

Cadillac Fever.

-[mouthing inaudibly]
-Nomi's aunt has Pontiac Fever,

and now you got something
called Cadillac--

Is there some kind
of GM pandemic going around

-that I don't know about?
-[phone beeps]

Shit, hold on.
Let me shake this.

-I fucking panicked!
-My God, the master?

-I'm sorry!
-You were so dog shit!

-Mo, Yassir?
-Yassir?

-Mo?
-Keith?

I keep hearing Yassir.
You heard him right, Keith?

This phone technology
is a pretty powerful thing.

You never know who's listening.

Sorry, I was trying
to put Dawn on hold

'cause she's either
fully dying or fully lying.

[coughs]
I'm still here, MoMo.

Party line,
getting the band back together.

This new shit is so dumb--
conference call,

call waiting, clock.

Can't a phone
just be a fucking phone?

-[chuckles]
-What do you want, Keith?

Mo, I want to give you, um...
an engagement gift,

a-and I got to give it
to you tonight, and--

So just tell me where you're
at, and I'll come right over.

I'm across the street
from Gray's Papaya. I'm--

Hey, K-man,
you down for a boys' night?

Like back in our good old
post-rug, pre-plug Miami days.

I mean, we keep trying
to set shit right between us.

Do I got to stay on
for this gay shit?

-Whoa.
-Hey.

-No, no, I just meant I--

Yeah, we get it,
and don't you dare hang up,

'cause I'm not done
with your lying ass yet.

-[phone beeps]
-And she hung up.

Look, Mo, I would love
to hang out with you,

but if I don't
take the kids tonight,

Shira's new boyfriend's
gonna convert them to Mormon.

This is my, like,
last, last chance.

I cannot fuck this up,
so rain check, next week maybe?

I'm busy.

And weren't you just
about to drop off my gift?

-That's my call waiting.
-[line beeps]

Tell Dawnie to feel better.
Okay, bye-bye.

You never know
who's listening, huh?

You heard it, okay?
He's at Gray's Papaya.

-Are we done here?
-[phone ringing]

'Cause I don't like lying
to a good friend.

Look, boss,
I can't lie to you.

[weakly]
I'm sick.

Yeah, I'm sick, too.
Yeah, that bullshit got me.

[Blair] Uh, if that's your idea
of lying or friendship,

-yoink a doink.
-[knock at door]

-Coming.
-One sec.

-Hold on.
-[knock at door]

You lying piece of shit.
You--

[line beeping]

Fucking technology!

[agent]
Maurice Monroe?

Gents, can I help--
What the fuck is going on?

-You're coming with us.
-Wait, who are you?

upbeat music

Where am I?
Get your fucking hands off me.

All right!

[door closes]

dramatic music

Huh.

Well, this is gonna suck.

Let me out
of this fucking room!

Tried that.

Hey, I want to talk
to my lawyers!

-Tried that, too.
-I got to take a fucking whiz!

We tried that, too, and then
I just pissed in the corner,

but watch out
for the dead rats,

also the live ones.

They were pissed that I pissed
on their fallen comrades.

You telling me there's really
no other fucking way

-out of this place?
-One way in, one way out.

As far as we can tell,
we're in one of those

terrifying, off-the-books
NYPD black sites

you only hear rumors about.

I'm guessing 'cause, uh,
nobody ever comes back.

[chuckles] They just told us
to wait here, and they'd come

-and get us one by one.
-No big deal, then.

Let's just wait here until
they come back and get us.

-Are you fucking kidding me?
-Ugh.

I'm a legitimate businessman!
I pay taxes!

[laughter]

[laughs mockingly]
You know what?

Only a group this fucked up
could be in a situation

this fucked up and be all like,
"Oh, no big whoop,

just your regular
cop-napping kill room.

And, oh, by the way,
don't relieve yourself

in the fucking rat cemetery."

Speaking of which,
cue the Mourner's Kaddish

or whatever the fucking Mormon
equivalent is,

because if I'm not
at Shira's house

to pick up my kids
in 16 minutes,

-I'm fucking dead.
-Who cares?

I'm sorry, but isn't
the bigger-ticket item

why the five of us are here?

Something we thought
maybe you could explain, Mo.

Oh, so you think
this whole thing

is 'cause of me?

You are the criminal
of our group of friends.

That is some
real revisionist bullshit,

-historically speaking.
-[scoffs]

[Mo] Black Monday was on
you two contortionist fucks.

Here we go.

Did you forget
that you stabbed me

in the fucking back
while butt fucking

the entire financial world

and throwing an elderly maniac
off of a high-rise high dive?

That was you two, so maybe
we're here for that shit.

And did you forget
that I already went to jail

for that shit,
for fucking you, Mo?

Oh, my God, this shit again?

Okay, I had
to eat out my cellmate.

[Blair]
And I went to Congress.

I mean, I know
it's not as bad as jail,

but it's not nearly as cool
as you would think it was.

And I had to eat out
every night.

Do you know
how fattening that is?

The amount of butter
I consumed?

Shut up!

[Blair] The point is
they already closed the case

on Black Monday.

[Keith] Well, the case
is still open on Amerisavings,

or do you not remember
that time I thought

we were gonna die in the bank

and then we almost did die
in the fucking bank?

Is that when you turned the
retail bank into a blood bank?

Well, déjà Jew.
It's happening again, okay?

-My people can sense death...
-Your people.

...like a dog in a storm,
and thunder is coming.

Let me tell you something--

your Semitic sense,
right on point,

because if there was ever

a we-could-die-in-this-room
room...

I mean, I'm not sweating it.
There is no way I die here.

My landlady
does chicken bone voodoo,

and she told me I actually die
in a spaceship

from lung cancer, but still...

Look, guys,
whatever shit we're in,

it must be deep if they're
not afraid to punch a...

-Politician.
-No.

I was gonna say a white boy,

but the real question is,
why now?

All this shit,
it's in the past.

And Blair, he just got
my record expunged.

I'm clean.

And I only make records,
so I'm clean.

We at the Leighman Brothers,
we're clean.

Yeah, with the Lenny
out of the picture.

Hey, I had nothing to do
with that.

You might want
to tell your tailor.

Or your hairline.

[laughter]

Oh, that's great.
We're having a good time.

No, but Dawn is right.
Why now?

Maybe we're just here
'cause the cops

are extremely racist
and homophobic.

We're quite a tasty sampler.
You almost can't blame 'em.

Black, Black, gay, gay, me.

But the only one of us
that's been in hot water lately

is actually--
well, it's you, Blair.

-Yeah, not to point fingers...
-Oh, point, point, point.

...but, Blair,
you are the only one

who has had multiple attempts
on his life,

so, clearly, you're wrapped up
in some shady shit,

which is why everyone
around you

dies mysteriously or violently,
which reminds me...

-[Mo] Yeah.
-[Blair] Fine.

Maybe this is about
who's trying to kill me.

Well, it's not Dawn
because Dawn and I

-are friends again.
-Well...

Keith and I are friends anew.

-Yassir...Yass--Yass--Yass--
-Please don't do this to me.

-Yassir--one more time.
-It's Yassir.

We are cool now.

So that means
there's only one person

Machiavellian enough
to pull this off

-who also wants me dead.
-Oh, my God.

You're trying to make this
about me again, Blair?

If it were me,
fucker'd be dead.

-Mo don't miss.
-[Yassir] Wow.

-That's your defense?
-[overlapping chatter]

-That's true.
-[Dawn] Not great.

-I, for one--I believe him.
-Thank you, Keith.

But just to cross the I's here,

where were you the night
that Blair was shot?

-Where was I, asshole?
-Yeah.

-I was with Dawn.
-Ew, really?

-Unfortunately, yes.
-Okay, where were you?

With Larry.

Biblically speaking,
I'm sure.

Not my type.

What about you, Yass?
Where were you?

Motherfucker,
I was in the suburbs

putting a bow on that house
that you bought.

-Bow?
-No.

Well, Mo, I-I'm--I'm confused.

I thought you said
you just bought the house.

Um, well, no,
Yassir is clearly confused

because I wasn't
a homeowner then.

Everybody knows I just bought
the house, you know, for Nomi.

So, sorry, Yassir,
you don't have an alibi

unless you were doing
something else at the time.

What else were you doing?
Were you doing something else?

-What were you doing?
-Yeah, I-I got confused.

I'm sorry about that, Dawn.

Uh, I was at home...

alone.

You know that's, like,
the opposite of an alibi?

No, I was at Home Alone,
the movie.

I was at a test screening
for the movie Home Alone.

-Well, there you go.
-[Dawn] Okay.

[Yassir] Was in
a theater full of children,

the only adult there,

but we all equally
had a good time.

I believe him.
Case closed.

So we all have an alibi.

-Almost.
-Oh, me?

Oh, what was I doing?
Oh, I remember.

I had a meeting
with a high-velocity bullet

straight through
my fucking chest.

I'm the only one
who almost died, Dick Face-y!

-Twice! Na-d'oy!
-Exactly, almost.

Seems pretty clear to me

that the only one
who's profited from all

of these near-death experiences
is you, Pfaff.

You know, that's actually
a really good point,

'cause didn't a therapist
who just happened to know

all your secrets just
mysteriously get electrocuted?

Eh.

And a pastor who had you
in his back pocket

-got shot in the face.
-Okay, come on.

Huh, not so na-d'oy,
now, is it?

Oh, Blair,
all the shit you've done--

there's nothing
I wouldn't put past you.

Don't you mean
after all the shit

you've done to me, Maurice?

[chair clatters loudly]

Oh, we're gonna do this, huh?

[chair clatters loudly]

Guess that black eye is getting
lonely--it wants a twin.

-All right.
-Okay, I'll kick my chair, too.

[chair clatters loudly]

Pfft.

[Mo] Look, you want
to do this shit,

let's fucking do this shit.

Where were you, Blair,
when all those bodies

were dropping around you?

-Where was I?
-Okay.

No, I'm sure--I mean, you were
right there, of course.

That's the entire thing
about near-death.

Yeah.

The proximity of you to death
is--okay, that's clear.

I'm saying all those bodies

standing between you
and your career.

I mean, come to think of it,
shit, Roger,

your even--
fucking your dad died

while he was beating you!

-[gasps]
-Ooh.

Oh, my God,
I may talk a big game,

but remind me to stay
out of your way, killer.

You really are a monster.

-Yeah?
-Oh, we're gonna do this shit?

-[Keith] Whoa, hey!
-[Dawn] Hey, come on, guys!

[agent]
Pfaff, you're up! Now!

Just go.

You're lucky.

Yeah, I really dodged a bullet.

[agent]
Come on, break it up.

Okay, I'm coming!
I'm an American Congressman.

[agent]
Shut the fuck up.

dramatic music

Out.

Apologies, sir.

I'm just trying
to make this look legit.

Yeah, I'm good.

Yowza, that was
a close call, Congressman.

I'm glad we got you
out of there when we did.

Yeah, well, I was
just staying in character.

Well, then the Tony
goes to you, sir,

because you
sure had me fooled.

-[Blair chuckles]
-[truck door closes]

Oh, speaking of fooled,
I can't believe

they don't realize we've got
the entire place wired.

-Here, check it out on these.
-Thanks.

Is that a toilet?

Yeah, that's for
shitting and pissing.

I know the old gay Blair
just ain't what he used to be,

but once in a while,
I get a glimpse of who he was.

That kid just doesn't deserve

whatever they're doing
to him right now.

That kid grew up
to be a sociopath, Dawn...

one that we've all
had a motive to kill

from time to time,
even you.

And I'm not the one
behind all that crazy shit,

but let me tell you,
I will freely admit,

that motherfucker
is highly murderable.

-[Dawn] Yes.
-[Keith] Piece of shit.

[Yassir]
I just don't like him.

Uh, Agent,
that collective murmur

was basically a confession.

Now, get to grilling so I can
get to the bottom of this.

[splutters]
No can doodle.

Liaising with the NYPD
to kidnap your friends--

sorry, suspects--
already puts us

in a gray area
human rights-wise.

All we can do is scare 'em,
try to get 'em talking,

hope something
kind of shakes out.

Awesome.

So, uh, kids,
I can't help but notice

how you're looking
and feeling so well.

Oh, come on.

So again I ask you,
where's the party at?

And I swear to God,
if you lie to me--

Okay.

Mo...

...the truth is...
I was trying this on--

We were headed
to Nomi's album release party.

-We're sorry.
-What the fuck?

-What did you say?
-That's what the truth is.

-That's not what I meant!
-Her record release--

Fuck!

Fucking Nomi lied to me.
Look, you know what, Dawn?

I don't know if it's jealousy
or whatever the fuck it is

that's making you
drive this wedge

between me and my woman,
but you need to knock it off!

You know what?
Talk about revisionist history.

It was your woman
that ordered the McDLT.

[Keith]
Wait, McDLT?

What the fuck does McDonald's

delicious bacon, lettuce,
and tomato sandwich

have to do with
any of this shit?

Well, you know how they keep
the veggies and the meat

-in separate compartments?
-Yeah.

Well, that's how Nomi wants
her love life with Mo

and her career with me--
separate, to keep it fresh.

-[Keith chuckles]
-And what happened

to you, Yass, huh?

I thought you were
Team Mo Better Jazz, Yass.

You always kept it
on the level with me, man.

You--I mean, Jesus Christ,
you were my only friend

-when I was on the run.
-Your only friend?

I moved to Miami for you,

and you fucking locked me
in a safe.

You know why
they call it a safe, Keith?

Because it keeps things safe.

[Yassir]
I am your friend.

You wouldn't have even
been able

to do the Amerisavings thing
without me.

-That was you?
-Hey--Now, hold on.

You fucking snitch!

[Keith] Fuck, now I'm late
to pick up my kids.

This is great.

I'm officially
a deadbeat dad now.

Great.

Well, they were talking
about who tried to kill you

until they tried
to kill each other.

-You know what this is?
-A total waste of time.

My mom and my stepdad.
Yeah, same exact shit.

It's like they needed something
to fight about,

except, uh, their Nomi

was my dad's
second family in Ottawa.

I don't care.

One of them
is trying to kill me.

Can't you do something?

[sighs]

Send in the last party guest.

Are you fucking kidding me?

[Wayne]
Good evening!

[all]
Wayne?

Where have I been,
you no doubt conject.

Excellent query.

After my brush with the law,

the only job I could get
was a limo driver.

Driving around
this wretched city,

I became obsessed
with mending the wounds

I inflicted
on this broken world.

And I stopped doing a shitload
of drugs on the daily.

[Keith]
Huh.

As my mental acuity grew,

I spent my time volunteering
at a woman's shelter,

helping victims
achieve street justice

in a cool, feminist Equalizer
kind of way.

Eh, that'd be a good show.

Now, as far as society
is concerned,

I am the very model
of a modern major minority.

I think I speak for everyone,
when I say, huh?

What the fuck is all of this?
[chuckles]

We haven't seen you
for almost a year, Wayne,

and you come in here looking
like--I mean, Jesus Christ,

where's the Wayne that I used
to know who'd pull his dick out

and wave it around
in a very offensive manner?

At least that guy I understood.

All right, speaking of dicks,

-where's our Congressman?
-Cops got him.

They beat the shit out of him

before he got here, too,
black eye and everything.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

[Wayne] So have you figured out
why we're here?

We thought to find out
who tried to kill Blair.

Or who Blair tried to kill.

Or did kill.

Well, we all have alibis,
so there's no mystery to solve.

On the contrary.

By my count, there are three
obvious mysteries

in this very room.

Which would you like me
to solve first?

One, why is Dawn fidgeting
with that ring on her necklace?

Two, who orchestrated
this haunted house charade?

And three, who shot Blair
and killed his colleagues?

Three, I say three.

Yeah, number three
is the sexier headline,

but I'm gonna roll back
to número uno.

Dawn, what is that ring?

I'm sorry?
Come on--Fuck this.

Mo, I'm really
not in the mood, okay?

That's why it's purple.

It's a mood ring,
and purple means

I'm over it, so move on.

It's not because
it's an amethyst?

Actually, I'm--I'm--I'm not
familiar with that stone.

You're not familiar
with your own birthstone?

Get off my fucking ass

and stop asking me
the dumb questions!

That's Nomi's
engagement ring.

I'd recognize it anywhere.

It took me forever
to find the fucking thing.

What I don't know
is why it's around your neck.

What I don't know
is why you bought

Nomi a birthstone for February

when she was
fucking born in June.

Because our love was born
in February.

Don't change the subject, Dawn.

No, I was still in prison.

They let me out February 28th,

which means
you met Nomi March first.

-Okay, so I was wrong.
-Yeah.

I'll ask you again.
Why is it around your neck?

I was...

holding it for her
while she performed,

and I just--
I forgot to give it back.

[scoffs]

I used to lie, too,
when Shira would ask me,

"Why are you
not wearing your ring?"

And I'd be like,
"Oh, I left it at the gym,"

or, "Rings on men are so gay,"

or, "I left it at Jim's,
who's so not gay."

Shut the fuck up, please.
And I'm not lying.

Then why didn't you just say
all that in the first place?

Because I've just had
a really bad day

where I'm, like,
in extras holding

in the fucking Exorcist.

Jesus, let me,
like, try to breathe!

[imitates ragged breathing]

Wait.

How did it take you forever
to find the ring,

when you've only known Nomi
for a few weeks?

Getting warmer.

Why did you buy Nomi's ring
before you met her?

I don't know
what you're asking me exactly.

And why was it an amethyst?

Hot, hot, hot.

And why did Yassir put a bow
on your new house

on my favorite street
the day that I was supposed

-to come home from prison?
-Mm.

Oh, shit.
That was a painting of me!

Oh, my God, saying it out loud

is finally what helped you
put it all together?

You were gonna propose to me?

Again.

Hey, cops,
please come take me away.

I did it.
I killed everybody!

No need for a trial.
Just shoot me in the face.

Put me out of my misery.

Do you think
they still have a chance?

I don't think you're gonna
have a chance to cop a feel

until you start acting
like a fucking professional.

Guess I should get to it,
shouldn't I?

We sure did learn
a lot tonight about you

and how truly hated you are

by all the people
who know you best.

I wouldn't say that.

After hearing
you double-crossed Mo...

Well, for a good reason.

...and sent Dawn to prison...

All those circumstances
were beyond my control.

...the suicides
on Black Monday...

That was
a very sensitive day.

...I would say,
in my professional assessment,

that you sound
like a real piece of shit.

Okay.

But, uh, the one thing
that I couldn't shake

was what Mo said
about all the folks

who stood in your way,
so I had the boys

do a little, uh,
database digging.

Fucking technology.

Your dad died
of a heart attack, right?

Yes.
Suddenly.

But the autopsy said
that they found glass

in his intestines,
pancreas, and kidneys.

The guy was
a fucking snow globe.

[chuckles]

Well, I guess
it's true what they say,

we all eat so many things
without knowing it.

-Hair and spiders and whatnot.
-According to who?

Exactly--
the World Health Organization,

that is who,
so I think we could

probably just rule out
my decades-dead dad

from the suspect list, yeah?

Problem is, we just
can't rule you out, can we?

What the fuck is this?
This a setup?

It wasn't
until all your dirty friends

started smelling
a lot cleaner than you.

Throw him back, fellas.

-You want your confession?
-No, no, no!

Go get it yourself,
Congressman.

[Blair]
Okay.

MoMo...

Why didn't you tell me?

-The truth?
-Yeah.

You'd already
made up your mind.

I just felt like the lie

made more sense at the time,
you know, for you.

[door opens]

-I had no idea--
-[Blair] Hey, Mo!

If I'm so highly murderable,
take your best shot.

Let's do this.

Wait a second.
You were listening to us?

I thought you were getting
your fucking dick lopped off.

Yeah, I was listening to you.

And by the way,
you're a horrible father.

You make Bill Cosby
look like Cliff Huxtable.

-We all know he's a rapist.
-[Dawn] I do.

My cousin did crafty
on Ghost Dad...

Are you saying Bill Cosby
is a rapist...

...and they called him
Pill Cosby...

...or Cliff Huxtable
is the rapist?

Yeah, I guess he does talk
about Spanish fly a lot.

Whoa!
Bill Cosby is a rapist?

-I have to get rid...
-Wait a second.

[Yassir] ...of my entire
sweater collection.

You set this up.

You fucking set me up
to betray Mo?

Wait, you--hold on,
wait a minute.

-No, okay.
-[Mo] Betray Mo?

So that's why
you were trying to find out

where I was so bad, K-man.

Yeah, so you could have
Blair's goons scoop me up?

No, that was not--No, he told
me he wanted to call you

-to tell you good news, right?
-I just heard you!

-Good news, he said to me--
-Wait!

So that's why you were
the only person

that was taken out of here
for questioning?

-[Wayne] Brava.
-Holy shit.

- I knew,
once he had a black eye,

that it was his ruse.

A true black eye
wouldn't appear

until hours later,
not until the capillaries

leaked into
the surrounding tissue,

but for a former theater kid
with a small bruise kit,

he could make it
look convincing...

and fetching, I might add.

-Thank you, Wayne.
-Yeah, thank you, Wayne.

And you, you really think
that one of us

is behind this thing,
trying to kill you?

[scoffs] You really do need
a checkup from the neck up,

'cause if you keep this shit
up, one of us really might.

Oh, Mo, Dawn just wanted
to be friends, huh?

Let me tell you something.

Me not marrying Dawn
was the best thing

-that ever happened to me.
-Oh.

-Wait, wait, what?
-Okay, no, no, not like that.

Don't let him fuck us up.
That's not what--

You know what?
Fuck you, Blair.

-No, no, no, fuck you, Mo.
-Fuck my life.

Fuck 'em all.
Remember that?

You wish I would
have married your ass,

which is why you
asked three times.

That's some
simple-ass hat trick shit.

No, I'm glad
you said no to me,

because if you'd said yes,

I would have never met
the love of my life.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

-Yeah, that's right?
-That's right, Dawn.

And it drives you crazy.

That's why
you stole her from me.

I didn't steal her.
I saved her from you.

You wish that we had had
the same kind of relationship

that Nomi and I have.

Is that why Nomi asked me
to hold on to her ring?

The real reason is 'cause
she doesn't want anyone to know

she's fucking engaged to you.

And scene!

Congratulations
for telling each other lies.

Let me tell you something.

There is
a long history of labels

making their artists
seem single for record sales.

-Yeah?
-Want some examples?

Give me a fucking break.
I'll come up with some.

I'm on the spot.
I don't have anybody.

Yeah, 'cause
you're fucking wrong.

The truth is it's got nothing
to do with her being engaged

and everything to do
with her being engaged to you.

It's you, Mo.
It's fucking you.

If you were young and cool,
you'd help her career.

-But you're not.
-[Keith] God damn it!

This group is
so fucking easily distractible!

Okay, we are here
because this guy set us up,

and he's the reason I'm not
gonna see my kids again.

And the reason
that I'm gonna miss

Nomi's album release party.

Yeah, you're the reason
that we are gonna miss

Nomi's album release party!

Which is still
very upsetting to me.

[Blair]
Okay!

-It's upsetting to all of us!
-So what?

Okay, I'm sorry.

I'm just so tired

of feeling
like I'm the bad guy.

You are.

[Keith] Oh!

Man down!

Back the fuck up, Mo!

-[Keith] Finally, someone--
-Fuck you!

-I feel like you don't--
-What the fuck, Yassir?

-Wayne, this is for the ladies!
-[door opens]

-Fuck all of y'all!
-[agent] Hey, that's enough.

You're all free to go.

[agent] We only have
the black site till nine,

so scram.

[Dawn]
And shut the fuck up!

-[Yassir] Jesus.
-[Dawn] Little bitches.

[Keith]
What the fuck did I do?

'80s synth music

I was on my way to the Met
to drop off a big wig

when the cops jumped in
and made me drive here,

but at least
I can drive you guys home.

There's plenty of room
for everyone.

I'll pull it around.

Hey, Wayne,
you said you, uh, knew

who tried to kill Blair
and who killed all the others,

-the last mystery.
-Absolutely.

The killer's obviously--

Hey, check this out--
a remote lock/unlock.

[chuckles]
Isn't that rad?

Fucking technology.

[car beeps]

-[Dawn screams]
-[Yassir retches]

Tell me lies,
tell me sweet little lies

Tell me lies

Tell me, tell me lies

Oh, no, no,
you can't disguise

You can't disguise

No, you can't disguise

Tell me lies,
tell me sweet little lies

Tell me lies

Tell me, tell me lies

Oh, no, no,
you can't disguise

You can't disguise

No, you can't disguise

Tell me lies,
tell me sweet little lies

Tell me lies,
tell me sweet little lies

Tell me, tell me lies

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