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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,970 [western style music] 2 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:20,000 * 3 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:29,100 [upbeat techno music] 4 00:00:29,133 --> 00:00:32,633 [cheers and applause] 5 00:00:32,667 --> 00:00:35,167 - OH, THANK YOU. PLEASE. 6 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:37,370 WELCOME TO TOSH.0. 7 00:00:37,400 --> 00:00:39,200 WE HAVE GOT A GREAT SHOW. 8 00:00:39,233 --> 00:00:41,233 FRED WILLARD IS WITH US. 9 00:00:41,267 --> 00:00:43,597 WE GIVE THE PUKE KID A WEB REDEMPTION. 10 00:00:43,633 --> 00:00:45,633 AND HOW ABOUT BRO-PUNZEL? 11 00:00:45,667 --> 00:00:47,467 OH. YOU GOT TO RESP-- 12 00:00:47,500 --> 00:00:51,030 BELIEVE IT OR NOT, NOT ONE SPLIT END. 13 00:00:51,067 --> 00:00:53,267 THAT'S A HAIRSTYLE THAT YOU HAVE TO COMMIT TO 14 00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:54,900 AS A CHILD. 15 00:00:54,933 --> 00:00:56,103 YOU HAVE TO BE LIKE, 16 00:00:56,133 --> 00:00:57,733 "HEY, MOM, KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE SCISSORS 17 00:00:57,767 --> 00:01:01,667 IF YOU WANT ME TO LOOK LIKE A CENTAUR AT 40." 18 00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:05,930 I ACTUALLY MET HIM BRIEFLY IN NARNIA. 19 00:01:05,967 --> 00:01:09,127 HIS WIFE DELILAH SEEMS A BIT SHADY. 20 00:01:09,167 --> 00:01:11,827 HEY, UH, SPEAKING OF AMAZING HAIR... 21 00:01:11,867 --> 00:01:14,827 [audience laughs] 22 00:01:18,500 --> 00:01:21,430 IF YOU DIDN'T SEE OUR LAST EPISODE, 23 00:01:21,467 --> 00:01:23,427 WE MADE A GOOGLE SCAVENGER HUNT 24 00:01:23,467 --> 00:01:26,067 TO FIND THIS OLD PHOTO OF DEMI MOORE. 25 00:01:26,067 --> 00:01:28,067 WE MADE THAT THICKET 26 00:01:28,067 --> 00:01:30,197 THE NUMBER-ONE GOOGLE TREND 27 00:01:30,233 --> 00:01:33,273 FOR FIVE-- FIVE STRAIGHT DAYS. 28 00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:34,570 YEAH. 29 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:36,670 I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'RE GONNA GIVE US A PLAQUE 30 00:01:36,700 --> 00:01:39,300 OR A CEASE AND DESIST ORDER, 31 00:01:39,333 --> 00:01:41,803 BUT I WOULD LIKE TO READ SOME OF THE FUNNIEST COMMENTS 32 00:01:41,833 --> 00:01:43,933 POSTED ON OUR WEBSITES. 33 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:02,630 GROSS, SALLYTWO[bleep]. 34 00:02:02,667 --> 00:02:06,427 [laughter] 35 00:02:06,467 --> 00:02:09,367 [man yelling] 36 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,100 WHAT'S THAT NOISE? 37 00:02:11,133 --> 00:02:12,433 [goat bleating] 38 00:02:12,467 --> 00:02:15,097 OH, YEAH, IT'S THE GOAT THAT YELLS LIKE A HUMAN. 39 00:02:15,133 --> 00:02:17,703 WHAT ARE YOU SCREAMING AT, GOAT? 40 00:02:17,733 --> 00:02:19,733 MEGAN FOX? 41 00:02:19,767 --> 00:02:22,067 SHE'S PERFECT. WHY WOULD YOU YELL AT HER? 42 00:02:22,067 --> 00:02:24,197 IS IT BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN READING SOME OF THE BLOGGERS 43 00:02:24,233 --> 00:02:26,773 WHO SAY THAT SHE HAS TOE-THUMBS? 44 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,800 DO WE HAVE A REAL, HONEST CLOSE-UP OF HER THUMB? 45 00:02:29,833 --> 00:02:32,373 [goat bleating] 46 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,270 THAT IS A DEAL BREAKER. 47 00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:37,600 NO WONDER I CAN'T READ HER TEXTS. 48 00:02:37,633 --> 00:02:41,073 SHE'S HAMMERING OUT SIX KEYS AT A TIME. 49 00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:42,927 ALL RIGHT, I LOVE THIS NEXT CLIP. 50 00:02:42,967 --> 00:02:44,727 IT'S THE OTTOMAN HUMPERS. HAVE YOU SEEN IT? 51 00:02:44,767 --> 00:02:46,067 YEAH. 52 00:02:46,067 --> 00:02:48,167 IT'S JUST FIVE DUDES AND A PIECE OF FURNITURE 53 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:49,730 HAVING A GREAT TIME. 54 00:02:49,767 --> 00:02:53,097 THERE'S NOTHING GAY ABOUT IT. THIS IS WHAT DUDES DO. 55 00:02:53,133 --> 00:02:56,103 THEY HAVE MADE OTTOMAN HUMPING A SPORT. 56 00:02:56,133 --> 00:02:57,903 AND THEY ARE THE DREAM TEAM. 57 00:02:57,933 --> 00:02:59,503 [voice echoing] LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 58 00:02:59,533 --> 00:03:01,433 PLEASE WELCOME YOUR STARTING LINEUP. 59 00:03:01,467 --> 00:03:05,097 FROM ALABAMA, HIS PATENTED MOVE IS THE MISSIONARY LUMBAR. 60 00:03:05,133 --> 00:03:08,773 PLEASE WELCOME RELENTLESS. 61 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,170 THREE YEARS IN THE GAME, 62 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,230 GIVE IT UP FOR MR. CORNER POCKET HIMSELF, 63 00:03:12,267 --> 00:03:14,727 X2C. 64 00:03:14,767 --> 00:03:17,597 HE'S NOT A REAL PLUMBER. HE'S THE PUMA POUNCER. 65 00:03:17,633 --> 00:03:20,803 PLEASE WELCOME PIPELAYA. 66 00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:23,733 SEVEN YEARS STRONG, SPECIALIZING IN FUTONS. 67 00:03:23,767 --> 00:03:28,497 IT'S THE OFFSHORE DRILLER, HERE'S PRE$$URE. 68 00:03:28,533 --> 00:03:30,703 HE'S NOT LEGALLY ALLOWED WITHIN 100 YARDS 69 00:03:30,733 --> 00:03:32,203 OF A FURNITURE STORE. 70 00:03:32,233 --> 00:03:35,903 LADIES, IT'S SATISFAKTION. 71 00:03:35,933 --> 00:03:38,503 [normal voice] EVERY TEAM NEEDS A GREAT SIXTH MAN, 72 00:03:38,533 --> 00:03:40,073 A ROLE PLAYER. 73 00:03:40,067 --> 00:03:41,567 THAT'S WHERE I COME IN. 74 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,930 GIVE IT UP FOR ME, DANIEL TOSH, 75 00:03:43,967 --> 00:03:47,127 AKA PEACH SHERBET. 76 00:03:47,167 --> 00:03:48,127 [sultry music] 77 00:03:48,167 --> 00:03:49,727 YEAH. 78 00:03:49,767 --> 00:03:53,767 FINALLY SOMEONE'S TAKING CARE OF HER NEEDS. 79 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:57,630 I GET THE JOKE. THE WHITE GUY GOES DOWN. 80 00:03:57,667 --> 00:03:58,967 [sighs] 81 00:03:59,067 --> 00:04:01,297 MOVING ON TO MY FAVORITE SEGMENT, 82 00:04:01,333 --> 00:04:03,073 REAL OR FAKE? 83 00:04:03,100 --> 00:04:04,330 [spraying] 84 00:04:04,367 --> 00:04:05,467 - [laughs] 85 00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:07,400 - OH, HE HAS SCISSORS. 86 00:04:07,433 --> 00:04:11,403 - OH, MY GOD. 87 00:04:11,433 --> 00:04:13,273 I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT THIS JUST-- 88 00:04:13,300 --> 00:04:14,830 - [bleep] GONNA KILL HIM. 89 00:04:14,867 --> 00:04:17,367 - I HAVE TO GO TO THE [bleep] HOSPITAL, WALLACE. 90 00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:19,230 - YEAH, WELL, NEXT TIME I'M DOING YOUR HOMEWORK, 91 00:04:19,267 --> 00:04:22,567 MAYBE YOU DON'T COME UP AND SPRAY ME IN THE FACE, JERK. 92 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:24,630 THIS VIDEO IS REAL, BELIEVE IT OR NOT. 93 00:04:24,667 --> 00:04:26,167 WE DID SOME RESEARCH. 94 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,570 I DON'T THINK IT'S REAL. 95 00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:31,100 THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO TELL IF IT'S REAL. 96 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:38,127 TOTALLY REAL... 97 00:04:38,167 --> 00:04:41,527 ON THE 11TH TAKE. 98 00:04:41,567 --> 00:04:43,597 TIME FOR THE PIC OF THE WEEK. 99 00:04:43,633 --> 00:04:47,073 AND BRACE YOURSELF, THREE, TWO, ONE. 100 00:04:47,100 --> 00:04:49,830 [audience groans] 101 00:04:49,867 --> 00:04:51,967 I'M NOT A DERMATOLOGIST, 102 00:04:52,067 --> 00:04:53,597 BUT I THINK SOMEONE MISSED A STEP 103 00:04:53,633 --> 00:04:56,233 IN THEIR PROACTIV ROUTINE. 104 00:04:56,267 --> 00:04:57,567 ALL RIGHT, NOW IT'S THROBBING. 105 00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:59,200 IS THAT REALLY NECESSARY? 106 00:04:59,233 --> 00:05:02,273 IS YOUR PILLOW MADE OF PIZZA? 107 00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:04,300 I THINK IT'S GONNA BLOW. 108 00:05:04,333 --> 00:05:05,933 LOOK OUT, NEW ORLEANS. 109 00:05:05,967 --> 00:05:07,297 [audience oohs] 110 00:05:07,333 --> 00:05:08,473 WHAT? 111 00:05:08,500 --> 00:05:11,500 THAT COULD BE THE CAUSE OF THE LEVEES BREACHING. 112 00:05:11,533 --> 00:05:13,273 ALL RIGHT, IT'S WEDDING SEASON. 113 00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:14,530 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS-- 114 00:05:14,567 --> 00:05:15,867 TIME FOR ME TO THINK OF EXCUSES 115 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,500 WHY I WON'T BE GOING TO YOUR SPECIAL DAY. 116 00:05:18,533 --> 00:05:21,503 [klezmer music] 117 00:05:21,533 --> 00:05:28,103 * 118 00:05:28,133 --> 00:05:30,133 [laughter] 119 00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:37,070 DID THAT JUST HAPPEN? 120 00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:41,070 ALL RIGHT, CAN WE SEE JUST THE DISTURBING PART AGAIN? 121 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:44,170 * 122 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:47,870 AT LEAST WE KNOW WHO'S GETTING FULL CUSTODY OF THE CHILDREN. 123 00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:50,230 YOUR HONOR, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT EXHIBIT "A" 124 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:52,427 IN THIS WEEK'S BREAKDOWN. 125 00:05:52,467 --> 00:05:55,467 [applause] 126 00:05:57,567 --> 00:05:59,497 - IT LOOKS LIKE A TYPICAL EASTERN EUROPEAN WEDDING. 127 00:05:59,533 --> 00:06:01,173 OKAY, RIGHT HERE. 128 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:03,930 PAY ATTENTION TO CHRIS BROWN'S BUDDY. 129 00:06:03,967 --> 00:06:05,497 HE KNOWS WHAT'S ABOUT TO GO DOWN. 130 00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:08,473 HE'S SEEN LENNY LOSE IT TOO MANY TIMES BEFORE. 131 00:06:08,500 --> 00:06:09,970 SEE, AT THIS POINT, 132 00:06:10,067 --> 00:06:11,927 ALL EYES ARE ON LENNY FOR THE RIGHT REASON. 133 00:06:11,967 --> 00:06:13,367 HE WAS BORN TO DANCE, 134 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:15,370 LIKE PAULA ABDUL, MICHAEL FLATLEY, 135 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:16,900 OR O.J. SIMPSON. 136 00:06:16,933 --> 00:06:19,303 BUT KEEP GOING. 137 00:06:19,333 --> 00:06:21,173 YEAH. 138 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:23,600 NOW SHE'S THINKING, "OKAY, HE CAUGHT ME THERE, 139 00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:26,333 BUT THAT COULD'VE BEEN AN ACCIDENT." 140 00:06:26,367 --> 00:06:28,167 [laughter] 141 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:30,870 "OKAY, THAT WAS NOT AN ACCIDENT. 142 00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:33,500 "FOOL ME ONCE, SHAME ON YOU. 143 00:06:33,533 --> 00:06:36,103 "FOOL ME TWICE-- OKAY, WHAT IS GOING ON? 144 00:06:36,133 --> 00:06:39,503 OKAY, I AM GETTING BEAT UP. DOES ANYONE WANT TO CUT IN?" 145 00:06:39,533 --> 00:06:41,533 [sighs] 146 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,797 TAKE IT EASY, ZANGIEF. 147 00:06:43,833 --> 00:06:45,533 THIS ISN'T STREET FIGHTER 2. 148 00:06:45,567 --> 00:06:48,297 YOU DON'T GET EXTRA POINTS FOR PULLING OFF A COMBO. 149 00:06:48,333 --> 00:06:49,903 [laughter] 150 00:06:49,933 --> 00:06:51,473 IMMEDIATELY LENNY REALIZED 151 00:06:51,500 --> 00:06:53,800 THE WORLD WAS NOT READY FOR HIS NEW MOVE. 152 00:06:53,833 --> 00:06:55,503 MAYBE IF HE DANCES REAL FAST, 153 00:06:55,533 --> 00:06:58,703 PEOPLE WILL FORGET THAT HE JUST SLAPPED HIS WIFE. 154 00:06:58,733 --> 00:07:00,803 YEAH, AND NOW COMES DAMAGE CONTROL. 155 00:07:00,833 --> 00:07:02,473 WAY TO BE A HERO, PAL. 156 00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,130 I'M SURE THAT GENTLE HAND ON THE FOREARM 157 00:07:04,167 --> 00:07:06,297 WILL REALLY NIP THAT SPOUSAL ABUSE IN THE BUD. 158 00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:09,173 "DUDE, COME ON, NOT OKAY. OH, YOU WANT TO KEEP DANCING? 159 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:11,570 OKAY, BUT WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT THIS LATER." 160 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,100 KEEP GOING. 161 00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:15,133 * 162 00:07:15,167 --> 00:07:17,567 I CAN'T HEAR BECAUSE THIS AWFUL MUSIC IS PLAYING, 163 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,530 BUT I ASSUME HE'S SAYING, "HUDDLE UP, GUYS. 164 00:07:19,567 --> 00:07:21,367 "SOME REALLY GREAT THINGS OUT THERE. 165 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:22,500 "JUST A FEW NOTES. 166 00:07:22,533 --> 00:07:23,833 "LENNY, GOOD JOB ON THE SPINNING, 167 00:07:23,867 --> 00:07:25,427 "SOME REALLY GREAT SPINS. 168 00:07:25,467 --> 00:07:26,797 "FEEL LIKE WE LOST YOU A BIT 169 00:07:26,833 --> 00:07:29,503 "WHEN YOU STARTED SLAPPING THE [bleep] OUT OF LESLIE. 170 00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:32,173 "BUT TO BE FAIR, LESLIE, YOU'VE ALREADY ACCEPTED 171 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:33,900 "HIS HAIRLINE AND HIS MOUSTACHE. 172 00:07:33,933 --> 00:07:35,673 LET'S JUST ADD THIS TO THE LIST." 173 00:07:35,700 --> 00:07:38,330 AND FINALLY, WHY DOES THE CAMERAMAN PAN AWAY? 174 00:07:38,367 --> 00:07:39,967 WEDDINGS ARE DREADFUL. 175 00:07:40,067 --> 00:07:42,067 THE MOST HORRIFIC THING EVER TO HAPPEN AT A WEDDING 176 00:07:42,067 --> 00:07:43,527 JUST HAPPENED, 177 00:07:43,567 --> 00:07:46,197 AND FRANCIS FORD COPPOLA HERE STARTS GETTING B-ROLL. 178 00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,633 BUT AT LEAST HE CAPTURED THE LION'S SHARE OF THE MAYHEM 179 00:07:48,667 --> 00:07:50,067 AND PUT IT ON THE INTERNET, 180 00:07:50,100 --> 00:07:52,070 AND FOR THAT, WE THANK YOU. 181 00:07:52,067 --> 00:07:53,967 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH TYRONE DAVIES. 182 00:07:54,067 --> 00:07:55,767 HE'S THE KID THAT PUKES. 183 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,800 [applause] 184 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:05,373 - AT M.U. IN COLUMBIA, 185 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:06,930 AND WE'RE TOURING THE COUNTRY 186 00:08:06,967 --> 00:08:08,327 WITH OUR FESTIVAL RIGHT NOW. 187 00:08:08,367 --> 00:08:10,597 - AND ONE OF THE PICTURES THAT I KNOW RYAN WAS INVOLVED IN 188 00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:12,473 WAS THE JOE AMRINE PIECE 189 00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:15,530 THAT GOT A LOT OF, YOU KNOW, PUBLICITY. 190 00:08:15,567 --> 00:08:18,527 [laughter] 191 00:08:18,567 --> 00:08:19,827 - I'M SORRY. 192 00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:21,367 - UH... - I'M, UH... 193 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:23,130 - WE'RE GONNA TAKE A COMMERCIAL BREAK. 194 00:08:23,167 --> 00:08:25,167 - [sighs] 195 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:29,070 - THAT IS THE EXACT SAME REACTION I HAVE 196 00:08:29,067 --> 00:08:32,227 WHEN A WOMAN IN A TURTLENECK TRIES TO TALK TO ME. 197 00:08:32,267 --> 00:08:34,467 NO ONE LIKES TO PUKE, BUT IF YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT, 198 00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,300 YOU MIGHT AS WELL DO IT AT 6:00 IN THE MORNING 199 00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:39,073 IN FRONT OF MICHELLE LINN ON KMIZ 200 00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:41,567 WHERE NO ONE IS WATCHING. 201 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:44,070 BAD NEWS FOR TYRONE DAVIES, THE INTERNET EXISTS. 202 00:08:44,067 --> 00:08:45,867 NOW EVERYONE CAN TRY TO FIGURE OUT 203 00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:47,530 WHAT HE HAD FOR BREAKFAST. 204 00:08:47,567 --> 00:08:49,697 MY GUESS IS GO-GURT. 205 00:08:49,733 --> 00:08:52,633 IN MY EXPERT OPINION, THROWING UP IS NOT THE BEST WAY 206 00:08:52,667 --> 00:08:54,367 TO PROMOTE ANYTHING-- 207 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:55,830 PROBABLY NOT THE WORST, 208 00:08:55,867 --> 00:08:57,667 CERTAINLY IN THE BOTTOM FIVE. 209 00:08:57,700 --> 00:08:59,500 SO WE FLEW TYRONE TO HOLLYWOOD 210 00:08:59,533 --> 00:09:01,773 TO GIVE HIM A SECOND CHANCE TO PROMOTE HIS FILM FESTIVAL 211 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,070 IN THIS WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION. 212 00:09:04,100 --> 00:09:06,130 [applause] 213 00:09:06,167 --> 00:09:08,567 IT'S TYRONE. 214 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:11,070 HOW ARE YOU? - GOOD. HOW ARE YOU? 215 00:09:11,067 --> 00:09:12,567 - NICE TO MEET YOU. HAVE A SEAT. 216 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:13,700 - SURE. - DON'T THROW UP. 217 00:09:13,733 --> 00:09:14,703 THAT'S OKAY. 218 00:09:14,733 --> 00:09:15,703 THAT'S A JOKE, 219 00:09:15,733 --> 00:09:17,103 RIGHT OUT OF THE BOX. 220 00:09:17,133 --> 00:09:18,403 DO YOU HAVE A WEAK STOMACH? 221 00:09:18,433 --> 00:09:20,073 - WELL, NOT NORMALLY. 222 00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:21,967 - ON TELEVISION-- 223 00:09:22,067 --> 00:09:24,067 - I GUESS, WELL, LIVE TELEVISION. 224 00:09:24,100 --> 00:09:25,200 - OKAY. 225 00:09:25,233 --> 00:09:26,603 WELL, THIS ISN'T LIVE. - YEAH. 226 00:09:26,633 --> 00:09:28,173 - SO JUST RELAX. 227 00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:29,630 FIRST OF ALL, LET ME PUT ON SOME MUSIC 228 00:09:29,667 --> 00:09:31,527 TO MAKE THIS-- 229 00:09:31,567 --> 00:09:32,927 WE HAVE SOME INCENSE CANDLES. 230 00:09:32,967 --> 00:09:34,667 GINGER. GINGER'S GOOD FOR THE STOMACH. 231 00:09:34,700 --> 00:09:38,800 WE HAVE TEA, AND WE HAVE A LITTLE ZEN GARDEN THERE, 232 00:09:38,833 --> 00:09:40,933 IF THAT WOULD HELP YOU RELAX. 233 00:09:40,967 --> 00:09:42,967 THERE YOU GO. 234 00:09:43,067 --> 00:09:45,627 OH, THAT IS PEACEFUL. 235 00:09:45,667 --> 00:09:46,697 I'VE BEEN ON-- 236 00:09:46,733 --> 00:09:49,073 WAS THAT A MORNING TELEVISION SHOW? 237 00:09:49,067 --> 00:09:51,067 - YEAH. IT WAS A 6:00 A.M. SHOW. 238 00:09:51,100 --> 00:09:53,100 I DON'T-- - KEEP GOING, KEEP GOING. 239 00:09:53,133 --> 00:09:55,473 - SURE. - JUST IN CASE. 240 00:09:55,500 --> 00:09:58,670 LET ME JUST PUT THAT NEAR YOU JUST IN CASE. 241 00:09:58,700 --> 00:10:01,030 DO YOU THINK YOU COULD'VE COMPOSED YOURSELF 242 00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:03,097 AND FINISHED YOUR INTERVIEW? 243 00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:04,973 - UH, YEAH, I GUESS. 244 00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,100 - SURE. 245 00:10:06,133 --> 00:10:07,573 DID YOU THINK MAYBE THE DESK 246 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:09,700 WASN'T THE BEST PLACE TO THROW UP? 247 00:10:09,733 --> 00:10:11,073 MAYBE TO THE SIDE? 248 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:12,630 - I GUESS I WAS LIKE A DEER IN THE HEADLIGHTS. 249 00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:15,197 - SURE, I MEAN, YOU'RE TALKING TO A GUY THAT'S [bleep] HIMSELF 250 00:10:15,233 --> 00:10:18,173 ON MORE THAN ONE OCCASION AS AN ADULT, SO... 251 00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:19,270 YOU KNOW WHAT RELAXES ME? 252 00:10:19,300 --> 00:10:21,270 - UH... 253 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:23,330 - I JUST QUOTE "DRINKING OUT OF CUPS." 254 00:10:23,367 --> 00:10:24,667 WHO'S THIS GUY, HUH? 255 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:26,830 THIS CAPTAIN KNOTS? CAPTAIN TYING KNOTS? 256 00:10:26,867 --> 00:10:28,867 ANYONE NEED SOME KNOTS TIED? 257 00:10:28,900 --> 00:10:30,600 I THINK YOU'RE READY. 258 00:10:30,633 --> 00:10:32,733 [whispering] I KNOW YOU'RE READY. 259 00:10:32,767 --> 00:10:36,227 [normal voice] ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET THIS HELMET OFF. 260 00:10:36,267 --> 00:10:38,267 THE WORLD WANTS TO KNOW. 261 00:10:38,300 --> 00:10:39,930 ARE YOU READY TO GIVE IT ANOTHER SHOT? 262 00:10:39,967 --> 00:10:41,027 - YEAH. 263 00:10:41,067 --> 00:10:44,767 - OKAY. 264 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:45,970 AND WE'RE BACK. 265 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:48,370 WITH US TODAY IS TYRONE DAVIES. 266 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:51,170 - AND WE'RE TOURING THE COUNTRY WITH OUR FESTIVAL RIGHT NOW. 267 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:54,370 THE FREE FORM FILM FESTIVAL IS A TOURING FILM EVENT. 268 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,370 [dramatic music] 269 00:10:57,400 --> 00:10:58,900 * 270 00:10:58,933 --> 00:11:01,803 WE'RE ALSO CURRENTLY DOING A-- 271 00:11:01,833 --> 00:11:03,803 WE'RE ALSO CURRENTLY DOING-- 272 00:11:03,833 --> 00:11:11,833 * 273 00:11:15,167 --> 00:11:18,067 WE HOPE THAT FILMMAKERS WILL CHECK OUT OUR WEBSITE 274 00:11:18,067 --> 00:11:20,467 AND FIND OUT HOW TO SEND WORK TO US. 275 00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:21,900 - ANYTHING ELSE? 276 00:11:21,933 --> 00:11:25,133 [dramatic orchestral music] 277 00:11:25,167 --> 00:11:26,227 * 278 00:11:26,267 --> 00:11:27,897 - I THINK THAT'S IT. 279 00:11:27,933 --> 00:11:29,173 - GREAT. 280 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:31,070 AND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 281 00:11:31,067 --> 00:11:33,797 [indistinct whispering] 282 00:11:33,833 --> 00:11:35,073 - AND WE'RE CLEAR. 283 00:11:35,067 --> 00:11:37,297 - AAH! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 284 00:11:37,333 --> 00:11:39,103 YOU NAILED IT. 285 00:11:39,133 --> 00:11:42,103 [Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee plays] 286 00:11:42,133 --> 00:11:50,133 * 287 00:11:53,233 --> 00:11:55,673 [applause] 288 00:11:55,700 --> 00:11:58,370 I KNOW, I KNOW, 289 00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:00,270 A BIT ANTICLIMACTIC. 290 00:12:00,300 --> 00:12:01,600 HE DIDN'T PUKE. 291 00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:03,573 BUT TYRONE AND I WENT OUT AND CELEBRATED 292 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:05,630 THE ONLY WAY A WEB SHOW KNOWS HOW-- 293 00:12:05,667 --> 00:12:08,597 BY DOING THE MILK-GALLON CHALLENGE. 294 00:12:08,633 --> 00:12:11,103 THAT'S RIGHT, ONE GALLON OF MILK 295 00:12:11,133 --> 00:12:12,773 IN UNDER AN HOUR. 296 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:14,070 LET'S PARTY, HUH? 297 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,227 - AWESOME. - THERE YOU GO. 298 00:12:15,267 --> 00:12:16,397 CRACK THE BOTTLE. 299 00:12:16,433 --> 00:12:18,173 DOWN THE HATCH. 300 00:12:20,900 --> 00:12:22,300 COME ON, KID. 301 00:12:22,333 --> 00:12:25,473 [belches] 302 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:27,300 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT WOULD GO GREAT WITH THIS, 303 00:12:27,333 --> 00:12:28,403 SOME COOKIES. 304 00:12:28,433 --> 00:12:30,603 - UGH. - FEELS GOOD, DOESN'T IT? 305 00:12:30,633 --> 00:12:32,233 TOP OF THE WORLD. 306 00:12:34,067 --> 00:12:35,367 - WHOO. 307 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:42,470 - SORRY. SORRY, TYRONE. 308 00:12:42,500 --> 00:12:45,700 - THAT'S ALL RIGHT. - BUT I LOVE TO PARTY! 309 00:13:05,300 --> 00:13:09,070 - [coughing] 310 00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:10,867 - IT'S ALL RIGHT. 311 00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:12,530 IT'S ALL RIGHT. 312 00:13:12,567 --> 00:13:14,567 OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT. 313 00:13:17,633 --> 00:13:18,873 - I FORGOT TO TELL YOU 314 00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:21,100 MY STOMACH LINING BLEEDS SOMETIMES. 315 00:13:27,133 --> 00:13:28,433 WHOO! 316 00:13:28,467 --> 00:13:30,067 - WHAT'S THE WEBSITE? 317 00:13:30,067 --> 00:13:31,527 [belches] 318 00:13:31,567 --> 00:13:33,497 - FREEFORMFILM.ORG. 319 00:13:33,533 --> 00:13:34,633 - OH. 320 00:13:34,667 --> 00:13:35,827 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 321 00:13:35,867 --> 00:13:37,667 IT'S A LOT OF FUN. 322 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:40,670 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH FRED WILLARD. 323 00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:43,830 [cheers and applause] 324 00:13:43,867 --> 00:13:45,097 male announcer: AND NOW IT'S TIME 325 00:13:45,133 --> 00:13:47,303 FOR THE PRANK OF THE WEEK. 326 00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:56,267 - YOU SON OF A BITCH! 327 00:13:56,300 --> 00:13:59,130 I'LL BEAT YOUR MOTHER[bleep] HEAD OFF, 328 00:13:59,167 --> 00:14:01,227 YOU SON OF A BITCH! 329 00:14:03,733 --> 00:14:06,573 YOU STUPID BASTARD! 330 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,130 YOU [bleep]DAMN SON OF A BITCH. 331 00:14:08,167 --> 00:14:10,367 WHAT ABOUT ALL THE [bleep] WATER 332 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:11,870 ON THE [bleep]DAMN FLOOR? 333 00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:13,100 - [laughs] 334 00:14:13,133 --> 00:14:14,433 - [bleep]DAMN--OH, YOU-- 335 00:14:14,467 --> 00:14:17,527 YOU GIVE ME THE [bleep] TAPE OUT OF THAT DAMN CAMERA, 336 00:14:17,567 --> 00:14:19,697 OR I'M GONNA TAKE IT AND THROW IT THROUGH THE DAMN WALL, 337 00:14:19,733 --> 00:14:21,303 YOU STUPID-- 338 00:14:21,333 --> 00:14:22,703 announcer: AND THAT WAS THE PRANK OF THE WEEK, 339 00:14:22,733 --> 00:14:24,203 BROUGHT TO YOU BY BURGER KING. 340 00:14:24,233 --> 00:14:25,733 HAVE IT YOUR WAY LATE AT NIGHT. 341 00:14:28,233 --> 00:14:30,273 [cheers and applause] 342 00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:33,300 - WELCOME BACK. I'M ON TV. 343 00:14:33,333 --> 00:14:36,833 IT'S TIME FOR BEFORE THE INTERNET. 344 00:14:36,867 --> 00:14:39,727 DO YOU REMEMBER A TIME BEFORE THE INTERNET? 345 00:14:39,767 --> 00:14:42,567 OH, IT WAS AWFUL FOR PORN. 346 00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:45,370 I USED TO HAVE TO GO TO THE THEATER TO SEE A MOVIE. 347 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:47,370 AND I'M SURE WE CAN ALL RELATE TO THIS. 348 00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:50,070 [woman moaning] 349 00:14:50,067 --> 00:14:51,597 - OOH-OOH! 350 00:14:51,633 --> 00:14:54,933 - OOH, HELL NO. THAT IS EXIT ONLY. 351 00:14:54,967 --> 00:14:57,797 - NOW, THAT'S A WOMAN WHO LOVES HER MAN. 352 00:14:57,833 --> 00:15:00,333 - PLEASE, I AM TRYING TO MASTURBATE. 353 00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:01,667 [sighs] 354 00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:03,600 CAN YOU BELIEVE THESE PEOPLE? 355 00:15:03,633 --> 00:15:05,633 MAY I? 356 00:15:08,967 --> 00:15:11,497 I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY KEEP MAKING NEW PORN ANYWAY. 357 00:15:11,533 --> 00:15:13,103 THEY ALL END THE SAME WAY. 358 00:15:13,133 --> 00:15:14,603 AND IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW THEY END, 359 00:15:14,633 --> 00:15:17,373 WE CREATED A COMPREHENSIVE DATABASE ON OUR WEBSITE, 360 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:21,170 WHERE YOU CAN TYPE IN ANY TITLE OF ANY PORN EVER MADE, 361 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:24,170 AND WE'LL TELL YOU HOW IT ENDS. 362 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:25,930 [whispering] SHE GETS [bleep] ON. 363 00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:28,867 [laughter] 364 00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:31,330 ALL RIGHT. 365 00:15:31,367 --> 00:15:33,267 DID I SPOIL IT FOR EVERYONE? 366 00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,200 LIVE VIA WEB CHAT, 367 00:15:35,233 --> 00:15:37,373 PLEASE WELCOME FRED WILLARD. 368 00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:38,630 [cheers and applause] 369 00:15:38,667 --> 00:15:40,567 HEY, BUDDY. 370 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:41,900 - HI, DANIEL. ARE YOU THERE? 371 00:15:41,933 --> 00:15:43,303 HELLO? - YEAH, FRED, I'M HERE. 372 00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:44,773 HOW'S IT GOING? - HELLO? 373 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:46,130 - [laughs] FRED, HOW-- 374 00:15:46,167 --> 00:15:47,397 - I CAN'T HEAR YOU. 375 00:15:47,433 --> 00:15:49,333 AM I SUPPOSED TO SEE YOU? I DON'T SEE-- 376 00:15:49,367 --> 00:15:51,367 I SEE NOTHING HERE. - FRED, WE SEE-- 377 00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:52,700 - HONEY, I THINK THE MICROWAVE 378 00:15:52,733 --> 00:15:54,273 MIGHT BE INTERFERING WITH THIS THING. 379 00:15:54,300 --> 00:15:56,670 - NO, I'M POSITIVE IT'S NOT THAT. 380 00:15:56,700 --> 00:15:57,900 FRED, TELL US ABOUT-- 381 00:15:57,933 --> 00:15:59,303 - I CAN'T HEAR YOU. 382 00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:01,773 AND I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING. 383 00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:03,830 - MAYBE IF I TALK LOUDER. 384 00:16:03,867 --> 00:16:05,227 - I DON'T THINK THIS IS WORKING. 385 00:16:05,267 --> 00:16:08,227 DID THE CAT PLAY AROUND WITH THIS CAMERA, HON? 386 00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:09,767 - FRED. 387 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,800 - I WANT TO TELL THEM ABOUT THE LITTLE VIDEO I MADE 388 00:16:11,833 --> 00:16:13,773 ABOUT MY CELEBRITY PHOTOS. 389 00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:15,630 IT'S PRETTY UNIQUE. 390 00:16:15,667 --> 00:16:17,567 OH, HERE'S THE PLUG. 391 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:20,270 - OKAY, FRED, PLEASE, TELL US ABOUT YOUR CLIP. 392 00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:23,170 - [mouthing words] 393 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:24,930 - HERE'S A MINUTE WITH FRED WILLARD. 394 00:16:28,267 --> 00:16:29,767 - WHEN I STARTED OUT AS AN ACTOR, 395 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,400 I REALIZED I WAS GETTING VERY SELF-INVOLVED, 396 00:16:31,433 --> 00:16:33,173 AND A FRIEND OF MINE SAID, "FRED, GET A HOBBY. 397 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,570 "BUY A CAMERA. 398 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:37,130 "YOU'RE GONNA MEET A LOT OF CELEBRITIES OVER THE YEARS. 399 00:16:37,167 --> 00:16:39,567 TAKE PICTURES. THEY'LL BE CHERISHED MEMORIES." 400 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:40,900 AND SURE ENOUGH, TWO WEEKS LATER, 401 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:43,133 I WAS IN TIMES SQUARE, AND I MET CHARLIE CHAPLIN. 402 00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:44,967 I SAID, "SIR, WOULD YOU HONOR ME 403 00:16:45,067 --> 00:16:46,597 BY TAKING A PHOTO?" 404 00:16:46,633 --> 00:16:48,873 WHICH HE TOOK WITH HIS TREMBLING HANDS, 405 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:50,970 AND I STILL VALUE THIS PICTURE TODAY. 406 00:16:51,067 --> 00:16:53,067 I GOT A LOT OF PICTURES HERE. 407 00:16:53,067 --> 00:16:55,367 CHRISTOPHER WALKEN I MET IN A RESTAURANT IN TORONTO. 408 00:16:55,400 --> 00:16:57,870 HE TOOK A PICTURE, INTERRUPTED HIS MEAL. 409 00:16:57,900 --> 00:17:00,930 HERE'S ME MEETING KAREEM ABDUL-JABBAR, 410 00:17:00,967 --> 00:17:03,297 WHO'S A HECK OF A LOT TALLER THAN I THOUGHT HE WAS. 411 00:17:03,333 --> 00:17:05,503 YOU SEE, I WAS STARING AT HIS BELT BUCKLE 412 00:17:05,533 --> 00:17:09,303 THAT SAID "WORLD'S CHAMPION" SOMETHING. 413 00:17:09,333 --> 00:17:11,203 THERE'S A PICTURE OF ME THE DAY MY DAUGHTER WAS BORN, 414 00:17:11,233 --> 00:17:12,703 WHICH I'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER. 415 00:17:12,733 --> 00:17:14,503 TOM HANKS WAS AT THE HOSPITAL. 416 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,533 AND I ASKED HIM TO TAKE THE PICTURE. 417 00:17:16,567 --> 00:17:18,067 HE WAS VERY GRACIOUS. 418 00:17:18,100 --> 00:17:19,530 AND HERE'S A BEAUTY. 419 00:17:19,567 --> 00:17:22,727 JOHN LENNON TOOK A PICTURE OF ME AND YOKO ONO. 420 00:17:22,767 --> 00:17:24,727 IT'S NOT THE YOKO ONO, 421 00:17:24,767 --> 00:17:26,697 BUT IT'S ANOTHER YOKO ONO. 422 00:17:26,733 --> 00:17:28,933 - MR. WILLARD, WE DON'T MEAN TO INTRUDE. 423 00:17:28,967 --> 00:17:30,967 - WE ARE SUCH BIG FANS. 424 00:17:31,067 --> 00:17:33,127 - WE WATCHED YOU LAST NIGHT THROUGH YOUR BEDROOM WINDOW. 425 00:17:33,167 --> 00:17:34,797 - BUT WE DIDN'T WANT TO TROUBLE YOU. 426 00:17:34,833 --> 00:17:36,103 - THAT'S ALL RIGHT. 427 00:17:36,133 --> 00:17:37,933 - WELL, COULD WE TROUBLE YOU NOW FOR A PICTURE? 428 00:17:37,967 --> 00:17:40,127 - SURE. 429 00:17:40,167 --> 00:17:41,797 THERE YOU GO. 430 00:17:41,833 --> 00:17:42,933 AND... 431 00:17:44,700 --> 00:17:47,370 HAVE A NICE DAY. 432 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,070 - THANK YOU VERY MUCH, FRED. 433 00:17:49,067 --> 00:17:50,497 [applause] 434 00:17:50,533 --> 00:17:53,403 HEY, UH, GO TO OUR WEBSITE AND UPLOAD YOUR OWN VIDEOS 435 00:17:53,433 --> 00:17:55,803 FOR A CHANCE TO BE OUR VIEWER VIDEO OF THE WEEK. 436 00:17:55,833 --> 00:17:57,403 THIS WEEK'S SUBMISSION COMES TO US 437 00:17:57,433 --> 00:17:59,133 FROM FIVESECONDFILMS.COM. 438 00:17:59,167 --> 00:18:01,297 CAN YOU GUESS HOW LONG THEIR CLIPS ARE? 439 00:18:01,333 --> 00:18:03,833 THEY'RE FIVE SECONDS. 440 00:18:03,867 --> 00:18:05,197 THEIR CLIPS ARE SO SHORT, 441 00:18:05,233 --> 00:18:07,333 WE ARE AIRING OUR FIRST-EVER DOUBLE FEATURE 442 00:18:07,367 --> 00:18:09,567 IN OUR VIEWER VIDEO SEGMENT. 443 00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:20,530 - YOU GOT THE MONEY? - WHERE'S THE GIRL? 444 00:18:20,567 --> 00:18:22,427 - GOT HER RIGHT HERE. 445 00:18:24,867 --> 00:18:28,067 - WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE WIN BEN STEIN'S MONEY. 446 00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:31,067 [applause] 447 00:18:34,100 --> 00:18:37,070 [banjo music] 448 00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:39,100 * 449 00:18:44,067 --> 00:18:47,067 [applause] 450 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:55,930 - [sighs] 451 00:18:55,967 --> 00:18:58,467 LET ME GET A MINI VODKA. 452 00:19:01,567 --> 00:19:05,127 'CAUSE I'M GETTING [bleep] UP TONIGHT! 453 00:19:05,167 --> 00:19:08,067 JUST GOT PAID UP OUT THIS BITCH. 454 00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:13,073 [applause] 455 00:19:13,067 --> 00:19:15,267 - OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING. 456 00:19:15,300 --> 00:19:17,070 MAKE SURE YOU WATCH NEXT WEEK 457 00:19:17,100 --> 00:19:20,070 WHEN "SCARLET TAKES A TUMBLE" GETS A WEB REDEMPTION. 458 00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,900 AND IF I HAVE MY WAY, NO ONE'S TAKING A TUMBLE. 459 00:19:27,267 --> 00:19:29,227 THAT WAS REAL. 460 00:19:29,267 --> 00:19:31,597 AND ALSO MAKE SURE YOU GO TO OUR WEBSITE, 461 00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:33,903 COMEDYCENTRAL.COM/TOSH.0, 462 00:19:33,933 --> 00:19:36,133 WHERE WE ARE RELEASING A NEW DAVID KOECHNER 463 00:19:36,167 --> 00:19:38,067 FLOWER SHOP SHORT TONIGHT. 464 00:19:38,067 --> 00:19:41,227 AND CHECK OUT THE PORN SPOILER ALERT DATABASE. 465 00:19:41,267 --> 00:19:44,627 I LEAVE YOU WITH THE UNSUNG HEROES OF THE INTERNET. 466 00:19:44,667 --> 00:19:46,827 PEOPLE GET HURT ON THE INTERNET ALL THE TIME, 467 00:19:46,867 --> 00:19:48,267 BUT IT'S WHAT THEY GET HURT ON 468 00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:50,330 THAT TOSH.0 WOULD LIKE TO TIP ITS HAT TO. 469 00:19:50,367 --> 00:19:52,197 THIS WEEK, IT'S THE TREADMILL. 470 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:55,573 HERE'S A MASH-UP OF SOME OF YOUR BEST MOMENTS. 471 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:58,570 [rock music] 472 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:06,600 * 473 00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:19,703 OH, SOLID WORK, TREADMILL. SOLID WORK. 474 00:20:19,733 --> 00:20:21,873 GOOD NIGHT. SEE YOU GUYS NEXT WEEK. 475 00:20:21,900 --> 00:20:24,870 [cheers and applause] 476 00:20:24,900 --> 00:20:27,900 Captioning by CaptionMax www.captionmax.com 477 00:20:31,233 --> 00:20:32,533 WHAT--WHAT HAPPENED-- 478 00:20:32,567 --> 00:20:36,527 HOW WAS THE NEWSCASTER AFTER THE CAMERAS HAD CUT 479 00:20:36,567 --> 00:20:38,097 AND YOU WENT TO COMMERCIALS? 480 00:20:38,133 --> 00:20:41,433 - SHE GRABBED THE SIDES OF HER HEAD AND STARTED SCREAMING. 481 00:20:41,467 --> 00:20:42,467 - REALLY? - YEAH. 482 00:20:42,500 --> 00:20:43,870 SHE WASN'T-- 483 00:20:43,900 --> 00:20:47,130 WELL, NO ONE WOULD BE EXPECTING THAT, BUT, UM-- 484 00:20:47,167 --> 00:20:50,197 - THAT'S MORE BIZARRE THAN YOU THROWING UP, 485 00:20:50,233 --> 00:20:52,203 IS HAVING HER JUST, 486 00:20:52,233 --> 00:20:53,933 "AAH!" 487 00:20:58,067 --> 00:20:59,597 - YOUR VOMIT LOOKED WHITE. - MM-HMM. 488 00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:02,433 HAVE YOU ONLY SEEN IT ONLINE? - YES. 489 00:21:02,467 --> 00:21:03,867 CAN YOU SEE IT IN IMAX? 490 00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:06,530 SHE'S SUCH A BITCH, MISS SAND. 491 00:21:06,567 --> 00:21:09,067 DRINKING OUT OF CUPS, BEING A BITCH. 492 00:21:09,100 --> 00:21:10,700 I BET HER FIST-- I BET HER-- 493 00:21:10,733 --> 00:21:12,173 [mumbling nonsensically] 494 00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:15,070 A KID IN THE BACKGROUND GOING [bleep] CRAZY. 495 00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:17,070 WHO'S THIS GUY, HUH? 496 00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:18,867 COME ON, BUDDY. - WELL, IF YOU'RE TAPPING OUT-- 497 00:21:18,900 --> 00:21:20,200 - I'M TAPPING OUT. I'M TAPPING OUT. 498 00:21:20,233 --> 00:21:21,373 I'M TAPPING OUT. I'M TAPPING OUT. 499 00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,070 I'M DONE. I THINK TOGETHER-- 500 00:21:23,067 --> 00:21:24,697 TOGETHER WE DRANK A GALLON. 501 00:21:24,733 --> 00:21:26,703 OH, BAD IDEA. 34613

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