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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,458 -Hi! -Hi! 2 00:00:57,917 --> 00:01:00,750 -What a beautiful wedding! -Yeah, it is. 3 00:01:02,958 --> 00:01:05,458 Could you give this to the groom? 4 00:01:06,125 --> 00:01:07,042 From his wife. 5 00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:11,542 I promise I'll reward you with some nice pictures... 6 00:01:11,625 --> 00:01:13,708 -Oh, yeah? How nice? -You'll see... 7 00:01:18,833 --> 00:01:21,917 Can't wait any longer. Meet me in the bedroom. In 15. Pants off. Your wife 8 00:01:32,458 --> 00:01:34,958 Welcome! Thank you for coming! 9 00:01:43,125 --> 00:01:44,333 -Oh, no! -Oh, yes! 10 00:01:44,417 --> 00:01:46,042 -Oh, no, you don't! -Oh, but yes, I do! 11 00:01:46,125 --> 00:01:48,958 I'm so hot from hiding inside that closet. Touch me! 12 00:01:49,042 --> 00:01:53,167 You're completely insane! Look, it's over between us. 13 00:01:53,250 --> 00:01:56,125 Can't you understand I finally found a normal girl... 14 00:01:56,208 --> 00:01:58,458 I had to find out from the tabloids that Mr. Minister is marrying his daughter 15 00:01:58,542 --> 00:01:59,583 to you, my dear beloved teacher? 16 00:01:59,667 --> 00:02:00,875 That's not the issue here... 17 00:02:00,958 --> 00:02:04,500 -Well, then what is the issue?! -We love each other. 18 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:06,708 That's enough for me to... 19 00:02:07,875 --> 00:02:11,458 It has nothing to do with money. Her father might as well be a tractor driver. 20 00:02:11,542 --> 00:02:14,042 I would have married her anyway. Marriage is merely... 21 00:02:17,208 --> 00:02:18,375 A confirmation? 22 00:02:20,292 --> 00:02:23,375 Somebody's at the door! Get in there! 23 00:02:23,458 --> 00:02:26,167 -I don't want to! -Now! Move, come on! 24 00:02:27,583 --> 00:02:29,917 There's no one in here. 25 00:02:32,833 --> 00:02:35,250 Pew! Smells like shit in here! 26 00:02:36,958 --> 00:02:39,958 What the fuck is this? A sacrificial altar?! 27 00:02:40,042 --> 00:02:45,083 Rich girls get to be fucked with rose petals up their asses. Didn't you know? 28 00:02:46,042 --> 00:02:48,500 Give it to me. It's my turn, c'mon! 29 00:02:48,583 --> 00:02:50,417 Listen, bitch... 30 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:54,958 Did you notice that weird photographer snooping around here? 31 00:02:55,042 --> 00:02:57,542 Oh, I thought it was just me! I'm so wasted. 32 00:02:57,625 --> 00:02:59,292 No, he really is sneaking around. 33 00:02:59,375 --> 00:03:01,417 Maybe he's with the fuckin' secret services. 34 00:03:03,958 --> 00:03:05,083 Hands off! 35 00:03:05,167 --> 00:03:06,875 Thank God this bitch finally found someone to marry. 36 00:03:06,958 --> 00:03:09,042 I didn't think there were any fools left. 37 00:03:09,125 --> 00:03:13,083 After last year's shit, even her father couldn't have helped her. 38 00:03:13,167 --> 00:03:15,625 Well, what can you do, the princess got jealous. 39 00:03:15,708 --> 00:03:18,708 She went after them and set their tent on fire. 40 00:03:18,792 --> 00:03:23,375 -And they were inside. -And he was inside her... 41 00:03:26,625 --> 00:03:28,083 Hey, love, do you want some too? 42 00:03:28,167 --> 00:03:29,083 Take a puff! 43 00:03:29,167 --> 00:03:31,375 They spent like three weeks in the hospital, didn't they? 44 00:03:31,458 --> 00:03:36,292 -This one seems like a nice guy, right? -Yeah... 45 00:03:36,375 --> 00:03:39,625 Maybe... He's a wimp if you ask me. 46 00:03:39,708 --> 00:03:41,917 This smell is killing me. I can't breathe. 47 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:45,833 -No more of this strong stuff for you. -Smells like someone took a dump. 48 00:03:45,917 --> 00:03:48,208 -Wait! -Come on already! 49 00:03:48,292 --> 00:03:50,542 -Let's go take a selfie! -OK. 50 00:03:50,625 --> 00:03:53,625 You can put that ugly skunk of yours in here, not me. 51 00:03:53,708 --> 00:03:54,708 OK. 52 00:03:59,625 --> 00:04:00,833 Now please leave. 53 00:04:00,917 --> 00:04:03,542 -I'm not leaving without you. -You're totally insane. 54 00:04:04,042 --> 00:04:05,583 -Am I now? -Yes, you are. 55 00:04:11,292 --> 00:04:12,333 CHEATED ON ON HER WEDDING DAY 56 00:04:12,417 --> 00:04:13,375 CAUGHT HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH HIS STUDENT 57 00:04:21,833 --> 00:04:23,333 HOT PURSUIT 58 00:04:24,125 --> 00:04:26,583 I'll get you for this, you slut! Wait! 59 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,750 Open this fucking door! 60 00:04:29,833 --> 00:04:32,167 I'm gonna fuckin' kill you, you slut! 61 00:04:33,375 --> 00:04:35,667 You slut, I'm gonna kill you! 62 00:04:44,875 --> 00:04:48,083 Check this one out! Upper class hoe with black lipstick. 63 00:04:48,625 --> 00:04:51,125 Black belt in blowjobs, can't you tell?! 64 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,250 Hey, fellas, which one of you is Rãzvan? 65 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,042 I'm Niculae, we talked on the phone about the weed... 66 00:05:30,125 --> 00:05:32,333 Wow, keep it down! 67 00:05:32,958 --> 00:05:34,625 Sorry, I didn't realize anyone was... 68 00:05:34,708 --> 00:05:38,292 I'd like a kilo or even one and a half, you know. 69 00:05:38,375 --> 00:05:39,250 How much? 70 00:05:39,333 --> 00:05:42,208 A kilo for starters, you know, in case I don't get the recipe right. 71 00:05:42,792 --> 00:05:45,042 -Seven, tops! -Seven what? 72 00:05:47,417 --> 00:05:48,292 -Grams. -Grams?! 73 00:05:48,375 --> 00:05:50,250 Are you selling gold?! I'm not here to make earrings. 74 00:05:50,333 --> 00:05:52,375 Come on! I'm paying you up front. 75 00:05:53,500 --> 00:05:56,250 -This guy's crazy. -How did you get our number? 76 00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:59,708 From Cecilia, who else?! You know Cecilia, right? 77 00:06:00,583 --> 00:06:01,792 OK, grandpa, it's either seven 78 00:06:01,875 --> 00:06:05,125 or you can cook yourself some of those zucchinis. 79 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,375 Oh, now I get it. 80 00:06:09,458 --> 00:06:15,792 Just like back in the old days when you had to show your ID to get your ration. 81 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,375 OK, now I get it. 82 00:06:19,083 --> 00:06:23,625 That's funny. Listen, I got the money right here. Nice and tidy. 83 00:06:24,625 --> 00:06:26,042 -All of it. -What? 84 00:06:26,792 --> 00:06:28,875 -I'm sorry. -Slip it in our pocket... discreetly. 85 00:06:28,958 --> 00:06:30,500 -Just like at the doctor's. -Now I get it. 86 00:06:30,583 --> 00:06:34,792 -Just like at the doctor's. It's 420. -I got what you're saying. 87 00:06:34,875 --> 00:06:36,583 -This pocket right here? -Yeah. 88 00:06:36,667 --> 00:06:37,833 You don't see a thing. I'm not giving you anything. 89 00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:43,750 Oops! Look... there! 90 00:06:43,833 --> 00:06:46,000 Just a second, I got to take this. 91 00:06:48,292 --> 00:06:49,292 Yes? 92 00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:55,625 Hi, Vasile. Thank you for... Yeah, look, I can't really talk now. 93 00:06:55,708 --> 00:06:59,625 I'm buying some weed from these fellas. Just for necessities, you know. 94 00:07:00,667 --> 00:07:04,792 Hey! Where the hell are you going? Come on! Where's the weed? 95 00:07:07,708 --> 00:07:09,375 I have to call you back, OK? 96 00:07:09,458 --> 00:07:14,333 Happy birthday to you! 97 00:07:15,042 --> 00:07:16,417 Happy birthday! 98 00:07:17,375 --> 00:07:21,875 It's your birthday and tonight it's all about you... 99 00:07:24,250 --> 00:07:25,750 Scent of a Woman! 100 00:07:27,667 --> 00:07:30,667 Not that again! I thought we already talked that through. 101 00:07:30,750 --> 00:07:32,250 I mean the film. 102 00:07:37,917 --> 00:07:39,542 What's funny? 103 00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:44,458 The film's funny. How can a blind dude speed drive a Ferrari?! 104 00:07:46,708 --> 00:07:48,958 Are you making fun of me? 105 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,292 Is it that dangerous time of the month? 106 00:08:03,542 --> 00:08:08,417 So tell me again, why do you smell like women's perfume? 107 00:08:09,125 --> 00:08:11,583 It's a different woman every day. 108 00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:17,208 Isn't it obvious?! It's because I'm banging the entire neighborhood. 109 00:08:17,292 --> 00:08:21,375 Every day I'm with a different woman and that's why. 110 00:08:22,417 --> 00:08:23,542 I'm messing with you. 111 00:08:23,625 --> 00:08:25,667 I told you I do tricks in kindergarten with the kids. 112 00:08:25,750 --> 00:08:29,042 My colleagues have all sorts of perfumes with them. 113 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:36,250 How many times do I have to ask you to tidy up a little bit around here? 114 00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:45,250 Did you even wipe the bathroom floor dry? 115 00:08:46,333 --> 00:08:50,750 Beware! Someone's been riding the cotton pony! 116 00:08:50,833 --> 00:08:55,250 I don't think you've ever cleaned the cat's litter box either. 117 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,458 My dear sweet baby... 118 00:09:04,542 --> 00:09:06,375 I love you. 119 00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,000 Come on! 120 00:09:10,625 --> 00:09:14,708 "Descend to me, kind Evening star!" 121 00:09:20,083 --> 00:09:23,042 Let me go! Let go of me, you idiot! 122 00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:25,208 Let's finish what we started, we'll put ice on it afterwards. 123 00:09:25,292 --> 00:09:27,792 Let me go! George! 124 00:09:32,667 --> 00:09:35,833 Oh, come on, I don't even get a kiss on the cheek? 125 00:09:42,208 --> 00:09:44,625 What do you think about all this? 126 00:09:44,708 --> 00:09:46,042 Are you ignoring me? 127 00:09:46,625 --> 00:09:48,292 Are you? You're ugly as fuck. 128 00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:54,708 Asshole! 129 00:09:59,708 --> 00:10:02,375 How many times did I tell you to wipe the bathroom floor? 130 00:10:02,458 --> 00:10:04,250 Stop before this gets nasty! 131 00:10:04,333 --> 00:10:09,042 Oh, yeah? Get down on your knees and clean it up! Now! 132 00:10:09,125 --> 00:10:10,792 I said now! 133 00:10:22,417 --> 00:10:25,917 I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. It was an accident. 134 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,458 How dare you hit me? 135 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,750 I think I'm gonna be sick. 136 00:10:35,375 --> 00:10:36,250 Are you fucking kidding me? 137 00:10:36,333 --> 00:10:42,125 You throw this shit on me and now you're the victim?! How's that? 138 00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:46,333 You never do anything around here! You think I'm your fucking slave? 139 00:10:46,417 --> 00:10:50,083 I know it's your B-day and I've been as nice as I could. 140 00:10:50,167 --> 00:10:55,292 You've been nagging me with this women's perfume shit. You won't stop. 141 00:10:55,375 --> 00:10:58,500 Yada, yada, yada! You're driving me fucking insane. 142 00:10:58,583 --> 00:10:59,417 If you... 143 00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:04,042 -Let me finish, OK? -No, not OK. 144 00:11:04,125 --> 00:11:07,083 Mommy, please, can you get me into Acting School? I'm so good. 145 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:10,083 -How the fuck do you know this shit? -How'd you get into Acting School, huh? 146 00:11:10,167 --> 00:11:13,917 I took the exam! Do you think my mom has money to get me into Acting School? 147 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,375 -I know her connections! -What fucking connections? 148 00:11:15,458 --> 00:11:17,583 -You're not fooling me. -Tell me what connections? 149 00:11:17,667 --> 00:11:21,375 -What connections? -I know who and how she got you in. 150 00:11:21,458 --> 00:11:26,792 I can't believe you're saying this about me. 151 00:11:26,875 --> 00:11:29,750 -I rehearsed and I practiced. -Practiced what? 152 00:11:29,833 --> 00:11:33,542 You've only seen like four films and two cartoons in your entire life. 153 00:11:33,625 --> 00:11:36,792 Now you think you're Tarantino. I mean, come on! 154 00:11:41,250 --> 00:11:44,667 I hate you and I'm leaving you. I took the cat. She hates you too. 155 00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:48,583 Dragos Teglas: Great! Can I take you out for a drink? 156 00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:53,042 It's difficult to be an adult in Romania without losing your imagination... 157 00:11:53,125 --> 00:11:53,958 Hello? 158 00:11:54,042 --> 00:11:55,208 I wanted to watch "Scent of a Woman..." 159 00:11:55,292 --> 00:11:58,375 -What's up? -He always smells like... 160 00:11:58,458 --> 00:12:00,250 ...like another woman. 161 00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:04,667 I don't know what I'm going to do. I want to go out, to get wasted. 162 00:12:04,750 --> 00:12:07,083 -OK, I'm coming to pick you up. -I've had enough. I hate him! 163 00:12:07,167 --> 00:12:09,500 I don't give a shit. I just want to have some fun. 164 00:12:09,583 --> 00:12:13,375 -I'll be there in a few hours, OK? Bye! -He doesn't even love my cat. 165 00:12:17,833 --> 00:12:21,500 Ana, I proudly present ECHO ONE. 166 00:12:23,667 --> 00:12:26,000 I thought about naming it Ana, but... 167 00:12:26,083 --> 00:12:29,167 ...there can only be one Ana in my life. 168 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:32,333 I wanted to thank you for believing in me. 169 00:12:32,958 --> 00:12:36,000 Actually, you were the only one who believed in me. 170 00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:40,375 I was thinking we could celebrate. You want to come over? 171 00:12:40,458 --> 00:12:42,500 Get a better look at it... 172 00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:45,000 My dad's home... 173 00:12:46,875 --> 00:12:49,375 Why is he always home? 174 00:12:49,458 --> 00:12:51,958 He's been acting strange lately... 175 00:12:52,583 --> 00:12:54,875 He's always babbling about tea... 176 00:12:54,958 --> 00:12:57,583 ...energies, karma. 177 00:12:57,667 --> 00:13:00,292 You could run out the window... 178 00:13:03,917 --> 00:13:07,250 ...if you wanted to... 179 00:13:08,375 --> 00:13:11,792 Until we meet again... 180 00:13:13,333 --> 00:13:16,417 ...I'll give you something to think about. 181 00:13:28,583 --> 00:13:29,792 I like what I see. 182 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,792 And what do I get? 183 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:09,292 -What are you doing there? -Dad?! Wait! I'm changing. 184 00:14:10,833 --> 00:14:12,583 -What are you watching? -Dad, don't come in! 185 00:14:12,667 --> 00:14:15,042 -What are you watching? -Ana? 186 00:14:19,333 --> 00:14:21,917 -You really lost some weight! I like it! -Really? 187 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,583 -You look sexy! -Only now you've noticed? 188 00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:27,917 -Are we having this conversation again? -You do look sexy! 189 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:31,458 Seriously, girls, do you think these braces make me look weird? 190 00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:34,083 -What?! -You think it's cool? 191 00:14:34,167 --> 00:14:37,750 -Braces are so sexy! -They are, right?! 192 00:14:38,625 --> 00:14:41,042 Men love it, believe me. 193 00:14:41,125 --> 00:14:44,083 I don't get it. What's so bad about wearing braces?! 194 00:14:44,167 --> 00:14:47,167 I was OK even with the fact that you were a little chubby, 195 00:14:47,250 --> 00:14:49,000 but now you have those wires in your mouth. 196 00:14:49,083 --> 00:14:51,333 Heavy metal smile, like living with fucking Terminator. 197 00:14:51,417 --> 00:14:53,375 Did Magi say anything about it? 198 00:14:53,458 --> 00:14:57,292 No, I mean I would've dumped his ass if he did. 199 00:14:57,375 --> 00:15:00,917 -Jeez, he's such a deadbeat. -Exactly! What's his problem anyway? 200 00:15:04,625 --> 00:15:06,458 How are my Indians doing? 201 00:15:10,042 --> 00:15:10,958 It's ready! 202 00:15:15,875 --> 00:15:17,375 What's up? 203 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:20,083 -Dude, are you OK? -I just got scammed. 204 00:15:24,875 --> 00:15:25,917 They conned me. 205 00:15:28,083 --> 00:15:31,792 The land from Târgoviste, where Grandpa was growing cabbage... 206 00:15:32,792 --> 00:15:35,083 ...the Turks were supposed to "grow" a mall there. 207 00:15:35,792 --> 00:15:38,500 But they conned me with the paperwork and vanished with the money... 208 00:15:38,583 --> 00:15:40,708 ...and my European future. 209 00:15:42,458 --> 00:15:46,625 I only have a few bucks left in my account. 210 00:15:51,917 --> 00:15:53,292 Where are the girls? 211 00:15:53,375 --> 00:15:55,167 They're out downtown. 212 00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:58,125 Sorry, sorry, a million times sorry. 213 00:16:09,250 --> 00:16:14,208 He got my socks wet and he put my cat in the toilet bowl. 214 00:16:14,292 --> 00:16:16,792 -Do you want to give her a bath? -What?! 215 00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,917 Little kitty needs a bath. In the toilet bowl, of course. 216 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,458 Hey! If you lay one finger on my cat... 217 00:16:23,458 --> 00:16:26,958 Oops... it fell! 218 00:16:31,750 --> 00:16:35,083 God, you're so dumb! 219 00:16:35,167 --> 00:16:37,042 We didn't break up because of that. 220 00:16:37,125 --> 00:16:39,833 But because he started laughing like an asshole 221 00:16:39,917 --> 00:16:42,833 during my favorite scene from Scent of a Woman. 222 00:16:42,917 --> 00:16:46,625 -We started fighting and shit happened. -Calm down. 223 00:16:47,958 --> 00:16:49,417 She set his clothes on fire. 224 00:16:53,292 --> 00:16:55,375 I would have given her one hell of a beating. 225 00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:16,458 Roxi, are you fucking crazy? Fuck this shit! 226 00:17:17,042 --> 00:17:20,875 You want this place to catch fire? Are you really fucking insane? 227 00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:26,792 -Do you want the both of us to burn? -Are you an idiot? 228 00:17:26,875 --> 00:17:31,208 Alright then, let's fucking burn down this place. 229 00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:34,542 See?! This is your film, right here. 230 00:17:35,667 --> 00:17:39,000 Why don't we just pour water on the light bulbs and the fucking sockets?! 231 00:17:40,250 --> 00:17:43,625 -You're out of your mind. -I'm out of my mind?! 232 00:17:43,708 --> 00:17:47,708 These were my flowers. My only birthday present. 233 00:17:53,083 --> 00:17:56,458 I got my socks wet again because of you. 234 00:17:56,542 --> 00:18:03,000 Have a bitch burn my stuff?! I'd beat the shit out of her! 235 00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:05,458 It's not like she bought me that shit. 236 00:18:06,125 --> 00:18:08,125 Hush, hush. Everything's gonna be alright. 237 00:18:08,208 --> 00:18:09,375 He's cheating on me. 238 00:18:09,458 --> 00:18:10,792 Magi loves you. 239 00:18:10,875 --> 00:18:15,042 Will the both of you just cut it out already? You're fucking retarded. 240 00:18:15,125 --> 00:18:19,750 Honey, he's a magician. He pulls scarves out of his ass for a living. 241 00:18:19,833 --> 00:18:22,583 -Forget about him already. -But I love him. 242 00:18:22,667 --> 00:18:25,500 You can do so much better than him. 243 00:18:25,583 --> 00:18:27,833 -I can, right? -Of course you can. 244 00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:33,958 I'm too good for him. He's an idiot. 245 00:18:35,125 --> 00:18:37,333 -Are you with me now? -Yes. 246 00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:39,292 -Yes! -That's it, girl! 247 00:18:39,375 --> 00:18:42,792 We're gonna get drunk. Really drunk! 248 00:18:49,750 --> 00:18:52,375 -To being free! -To being free! 249 00:18:52,458 --> 00:18:54,000 To you guys! 250 00:19:09,667 --> 00:19:11,375 Are we men or what? 251 00:19:11,875 --> 00:19:16,375 Look at us! We're in here playing computer games with toy tanks. 252 00:19:17,125 --> 00:19:19,708 -You know what we should do? -Get drunk?! 253 00:19:20,333 --> 00:19:25,292 No, even better, let's take our tanks out for a spin! To a brothel! 254 00:19:26,708 --> 00:19:29,042 Dude, you're not a real man 255 00:19:29,125 --> 00:19:30,875 unless you've been to a brothel at least once in your life. 256 00:19:30,958 --> 00:19:33,125 -Shut up! -And you just haven't been to one yet. 257 00:19:37,042 --> 00:19:37,958 I'm in. 258 00:19:38,042 --> 00:19:39,417 Me too. 259 00:19:40,917 --> 00:19:43,750 Look, I don't mean to spoil your fun, but some of us have a girlfriend. 260 00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:46,750 Real men pay for sex because they have the money for it. 261 00:19:46,833 --> 00:19:50,458 They have power. Money, power and women at your feet. 262 00:19:50,542 --> 00:19:52,542 Wait a minute, weren't you complaining about not having any money? 263 00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:54,292 I meant your money. 264 00:19:54,375 --> 00:19:56,458 The money you made with the perfumes, you know. 265 00:19:56,542 --> 00:20:00,458 What are you saving that money for? Let's put it to good use: hos. 266 00:20:01,125 --> 00:20:03,125 C'mon, bros, forget better supremacy! 267 00:20:03,208 --> 00:20:05,250 Is this guy suggesting we use my money to pay for hookers? 268 00:20:05,333 --> 00:20:08,167 I'll show you how a real life 3D woman looks like. 269 00:20:08,708 --> 00:20:09,750 Ana! 270 00:20:10,625 --> 00:20:14,375 What's the most hardcore thing you've ever done with Brain? 271 00:20:14,458 --> 00:20:16,667 I choose dare. 272 00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:18,667 We're playing truth or truth over here. 273 00:20:19,375 --> 00:20:22,792 I can't talk about it... It stays between me and him. 274 00:20:23,375 --> 00:20:25,625 Come on, you're only telling us. 275 00:20:27,708 --> 00:20:29,250 We're your best friends. 276 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:33,250 You guys had sex, right? 277 00:20:34,917 --> 00:20:35,792 Yes... 278 00:20:38,292 --> 00:20:41,083 -Really? -You know what that is, right? 279 00:20:41,167 --> 00:20:46,792 It's when a little bee lands on a beautiful flower. 280 00:20:46,875 --> 00:20:50,625 It's when a man loves a woman. 281 00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:56,000 When a man loves a woman, he respects her, 282 00:20:56,083 --> 00:21:00,583 he protects her, and he makes love to her. 283 00:21:00,667 --> 00:21:04,708 He keeps her secrets. And she keeps his. 284 00:21:04,792 --> 00:21:10,167 Well, fuck me. You girls are going to give birth to angels. Real life angels. 285 00:21:17,125 --> 00:21:18,375 Why did she leave me? 286 00:21:18,458 --> 00:21:19,917 Who left you? 287 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:23,708 -Go fuck yourself! -I was just joking! Why are you pissed? 288 00:21:23,792 --> 00:21:26,250 -This is what you call a joke? -Don't worry. She'll be back in no time. 289 00:21:26,333 --> 00:21:29,500 -We'll go out for a juice. -You just need to do some push-ups. 290 00:21:29,583 --> 00:21:31,708 Then she'll realize what a great guy you are. 291 00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:35,250 -Then she'll be like... The magic is back. -How do you know? 292 00:21:35,333 --> 00:21:37,042 That she's coming back? 293 00:21:37,125 --> 00:21:39,208 -Of course she's coming back. -Are you kidding me? 294 00:21:40,167 --> 00:21:41,625 Roxi? 295 00:21:45,625 --> 00:21:48,792 -Well done, Ana! -Oh, shut up! 296 00:21:48,875 --> 00:21:50,583 Just put a lid on it, OK? 297 00:21:51,625 --> 00:21:55,083 He stopped loving me because I have braces now. That's why! 298 00:21:55,167 --> 00:21:57,625 No one is ever going to love me again. 299 00:21:57,708 --> 00:22:00,458 It's never going to be like in The Notebook. 300 00:22:00,542 --> 00:22:05,708 I'm going to end up married to an old communist fart, just like my mother. 301 00:22:07,417 --> 00:22:08,458 Sorry. 302 00:22:09,125 --> 00:22:12,000 I don't want that, I want The Notebook. 303 00:22:13,208 --> 00:22:15,208 Everything's gonna be alright. 304 00:22:17,167 --> 00:22:18,667 You have us. 305 00:22:19,208 --> 00:22:23,833 Roxi. You can come live with me. 306 00:22:23,917 --> 00:22:28,833 It's gonna be just the two of us and you can have as many cats as you want. 307 00:22:28,917 --> 00:22:35,042 No, I don't want to be a crazy cat lady forever alone... 308 00:22:35,792 --> 00:22:38,625 I don't want that... I want to get married! 309 00:22:38,708 --> 00:22:41,375 Then get married! It's super easy! 310 00:22:41,458 --> 00:22:45,042 Every idiot wants to get married nowadays. 311 00:22:45,125 --> 00:22:47,917 Seriously! There are waiting lists in every city. 312 00:22:49,375 --> 00:22:53,167 That's not the point here! And it's not that easy at all! 313 00:22:53,250 --> 00:22:58,208 Oh, yeah? I imagine for you it would be quite hard... You're right. 314 00:22:58,958 --> 00:23:01,125 -Really? -Yeah. 315 00:23:01,208 --> 00:23:03,792 Bogdan would marry me in the blink of an eye. 316 00:23:03,875 --> 00:23:05,667 I actually have someone who truly loves me. 317 00:23:05,750 --> 00:23:08,250 -Oh, shut up already! -You shut up! 318 00:23:08,333 --> 00:23:09,708 Roxi... 319 00:23:09,792 --> 00:23:11,042 Trust me, 320 00:23:11,125 --> 00:23:14,667 anyone would want to marry us. We're the ones who must be picky. 321 00:23:14,750 --> 00:23:17,292 -Magi doesn't want me. -Yes, he does. 322 00:23:17,958 --> 00:23:21,625 You wanna bet? We'll get married tomorrow. 323 00:23:24,292 --> 00:23:25,208 Tomorrow? 324 00:23:31,833 --> 00:23:36,333 What's it gonna be? Room, hourly rate? Long, short? 325 00:23:36,417 --> 00:23:37,917 Are you together? 326 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,500 No, separately! 327 00:23:39,583 --> 00:23:41,917 Lookie here, you even got a rocket! 328 00:23:42,875 --> 00:23:44,708 We're open to all sorts of things around here. 329 00:23:44,792 --> 00:23:48,833 Hey, deadbeats, do you even have any money on you? 330 00:23:48,917 --> 00:23:50,792 We want three beautiful matching girls. 331 00:23:50,875 --> 00:23:54,250 And how are you gonna pay for them? Cash, credit or food coupons? 332 00:23:55,333 --> 00:23:56,250 Well... 333 00:23:57,875 --> 00:23:58,958 Cash! 334 00:23:59,042 --> 00:24:00,125 Show us the money! 335 00:24:00,208 --> 00:24:01,375 Magi... 336 00:24:01,917 --> 00:24:03,542 How much is it? 337 00:24:03,625 --> 00:24:06,292 -Give them the money. -Easy, Elvis. 338 00:24:08,167 --> 00:24:11,292 -I'm just asking... -Do students get a discount? 339 00:24:11,375 --> 00:24:14,708 -They get... a receipt. -Right, a receipt. 340 00:24:14,792 --> 00:24:16,250 Luckily, I have my student card with me. 341 00:24:16,333 --> 00:24:17,917 Money up front! 342 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:19,292 Wanna bet? 343 00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:23,083 Let's see who can get married in three days' time! 344 00:24:23,167 --> 00:24:26,083 That's about enough time to find a decent dress. 345 00:24:27,542 --> 00:24:30,583 You're a real genius! This is worse than 346 00:24:30,667 --> 00:24:32,375 going to the seaside two days before our finals. 347 00:24:32,458 --> 00:24:35,333 -Give me a break! -You're an irresponsible brat! 348 00:24:35,417 --> 00:24:40,208 Refresh my memory, how was it that you met this guy who loves you? 349 00:24:40,292 --> 00:24:41,500 What are we betting on? 350 00:24:41,583 --> 00:24:44,167 Anything, you name it! All in! 351 00:24:44,250 --> 00:24:47,000 All our personal belongings. 352 00:24:49,667 --> 00:24:54,417 -That's not enough. If you lose... -Yes... 353 00:24:55,333 --> 00:24:58,542 ...you have to go back to college and get your degree. 354 00:24:58,625 --> 00:25:01,042 -Oops! -OK. 355 00:25:01,125 --> 00:25:04,625 And you have to move out of your dad's place. 356 00:25:07,625 --> 00:25:13,417 And you, Roxi... have to delete your Facebook account. 357 00:25:15,167 --> 00:25:18,250 No... No way! 358 00:25:18,333 --> 00:25:19,958 Sister! 359 00:25:20,042 --> 00:25:23,375 Come on, I'm risking a three-year college sentence over here. 360 00:25:23,458 --> 00:25:25,667 -No! -Oh, yes! 361 00:25:25,750 --> 00:25:29,125 Alright already, it's a deal. Come on! 362 00:25:29,917 --> 00:25:31,708 Come on, Ana! 363 00:25:33,750 --> 00:25:35,542 Roxi, start filming! 364 00:25:36,542 --> 00:25:40,583 Today... I, Yasmine, Roxana and Ana hereby... 365 00:25:45,375 --> 00:25:48,625 Roxi, I'm only doing this for you. 366 00:25:48,708 --> 00:25:51,083 I don't want you to be alone with this crazy bitch. 367 00:25:51,167 --> 00:25:55,250 We swear on our souls and on all our personal belongings. 368 00:25:55,333 --> 00:25:59,292 I swear to respect my sister's pact. I want to be independent. 369 00:26:02,958 --> 00:26:04,750 We swear to get married in three days. 370 00:26:04,833 --> 00:26:08,500 My life is like a film and it's worth filming! 371 00:26:08,583 --> 00:26:12,917 I pledge to give up all my personal belongings 372 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,042 and to move out of my dad's place. 373 00:26:19,250 --> 00:26:24,625 I would like to add that we're not allowed to pay men to marry us. 374 00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,042 Fuck you! 375 00:26:28,417 --> 00:26:30,333 Congratulations on our wedding! 376 00:26:31,750 --> 00:26:34,333 I found the perfect wedding dress! 377 00:27:07,750 --> 00:27:09,750 Is this your toy? 378 00:27:12,958 --> 00:27:15,917 Don't be so shy, honey! 379 00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:18,583 There we go. 380 00:27:18,667 --> 00:27:20,500 I think I got WI-FI. 381 00:27:20,583 --> 00:27:23,250 I want to show you how this chick is holding her legs. 382 00:27:23,333 --> 00:27:25,583 I named it "selfie69." 383 00:27:48,708 --> 00:27:51,833 I never asked her for a single thing, 384 00:27:51,917 --> 00:27:55,583 but she, on the other hand, has an entire list of things for me to do. 385 00:27:55,667 --> 00:27:59,375 And don't get me started on the things I'm not supposed to do... 386 00:27:59,458 --> 00:28:02,667 And I just don't get that freaking cat of hers. 387 00:28:03,458 --> 00:28:07,250 You fall in love with a girl and the cat is part of the deal. 388 00:28:07,333 --> 00:28:11,875 OK, seems to be a good cat, you take care of it, you feed it, 389 00:28:11,958 --> 00:28:15,333 but it's like nothing else matters to her except that cat. 390 00:28:15,417 --> 00:28:18,375 And how does that make you feel? 391 00:28:23,542 --> 00:28:25,875 It makes me feel kinda... 392 00:28:29,042 --> 00:28:30,708 Never mind, I'll be fine. 393 00:28:31,208 --> 00:28:34,250 Don't tell me you're a virgin. Is it your first time? 394 00:28:36,792 --> 00:28:39,958 I'll help you build up some courage. We just need a little music. 395 00:29:25,583 --> 00:29:27,250 Sorry, I must go. 396 00:29:28,667 --> 00:29:30,417 Why, you got scared? 397 00:29:33,292 --> 00:29:35,000 Why did you get scared? 398 00:29:36,833 --> 00:29:40,042 I can be either a boy or a girl. 399 00:29:40,833 --> 00:29:42,208 What's your pleasure? 400 00:29:42,750 --> 00:29:48,792 You're a nice guy. Don't let a cat or anything else get to you. 401 00:29:48,875 --> 00:29:50,208 Thank you, but... 402 00:29:50,292 --> 00:29:55,083 These small things don't really matter. It's the big things that matter. 403 00:29:55,167 --> 00:29:58,458 Like love. Do you love this girl or what? 404 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,833 -Yes, of course I do... -So what's the problem? A cat? 405 00:30:01,917 --> 00:30:03,417 Or I got it wrong? 406 00:30:52,333 --> 00:30:56,333 Go tell her you love her. Be a brave man! 407 00:30:56,417 --> 00:30:58,833 Tell her what you feel. That's all that matters. 408 00:31:00,167 --> 00:31:02,042 -Have you ever been in love? -What? 409 00:31:02,125 --> 00:31:03,500 Have you ever been in love? 410 00:31:03,583 --> 00:31:05,083 So you have. 411 00:31:05,792 --> 00:31:08,333 So what did you do with the cat? 412 00:31:14,625 --> 00:31:17,167 Shut the fuck up! Only I get to scream. 413 00:31:23,458 --> 00:31:25,458 It's official! 414 00:31:26,375 --> 00:31:30,375 BEST BET EVER! 415 00:31:39,375 --> 00:31:42,000 I really need to teach you girls some poker. 416 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:48,417 Have you lost it? 417 00:31:56,958 --> 00:31:59,583 You didn't kiss her, right? 418 00:31:59,667 --> 00:32:04,458 Did you? Wait, I don't even want to know. 419 00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:10,167 Dude... I can't find my wallet. 420 00:32:12,083 --> 00:32:13,125 Is that Mihai? 421 00:32:15,208 --> 00:32:16,375 Is that... 422 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,167 That fucking idiot! 423 00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,958 What the fuck? Not in there. Be careful, my rocket! 424 00:32:27,042 --> 00:32:28,833 -Move it, come on! Drive! -Hey! 425 00:32:28,917 --> 00:32:30,792 Where do you think you're going with my girl? 426 00:32:31,625 --> 00:32:33,542 She's a rental, it's not like you bought her. 427 00:32:34,458 --> 00:32:36,208 Elvis, Turnip! 428 00:32:36,292 --> 00:32:38,875 -Careful with my rocket! -I don't give a fuck about your rocket. 429 00:32:38,958 --> 00:32:41,750 Move it! They've taken our girl. 430 00:32:52,458 --> 00:32:54,917 Elvis, this ain't no laughing-matter! 431 00:32:59,167 --> 00:33:01,125 Faster, faster! Come on! 432 00:33:01,208 --> 00:33:03,750 Drive faster, come on! They're onto us! 433 00:33:17,917 --> 00:33:19,833 -You gotta be kiddin' me! -Faster! 434 00:33:19,917 --> 00:33:23,167 Are you running from me? The nerve of these deadbeat losers. 435 00:33:23,250 --> 00:33:25,208 I don't care if it's red or yellow, just drive! 436 00:33:25,292 --> 00:33:28,375 If I lose Iuliana, you bitches are gonna take her place. 437 00:33:28,458 --> 00:33:32,042 -Hear that? -It's our ass on the line. Move it! 438 00:33:35,833 --> 00:33:37,833 -Push the pedal to the metal! -Come on! 439 00:33:43,125 --> 00:33:45,792 Fuck, they're gonna kill me if they catch me. 440 00:33:48,417 --> 00:33:51,375 Drive the fuck faster, you're driving like my grandpa! 441 00:33:57,458 --> 00:34:00,375 Man, why can't you drive any faster?! 442 00:34:12,583 --> 00:34:14,625 -Are you fucking kidding me? -Faster! 443 00:34:18,333 --> 00:34:19,417 We're gonna die! 444 00:34:20,708 --> 00:34:21,542 Faster, come on! 445 00:34:23,333 --> 00:34:26,292 Barasabia is Romania. 446 00:34:29,042 --> 00:34:30,250 My rocket! 447 00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:33,875 Be careful with my rocket! 448 00:34:35,583 --> 00:34:37,208 We're dead meat if you don't drive faster! 449 00:34:37,292 --> 00:34:39,458 They shot a hole through my windshield! 450 00:34:42,167 --> 00:34:43,500 Nice going! 451 00:34:55,292 --> 00:34:58,417 Dude, it's either us or... Just leave it! 452 00:35:07,708 --> 00:35:08,667 Leave it! 453 00:35:14,333 --> 00:35:17,083 Catch that fucker! 454 00:35:17,625 --> 00:35:19,292 Hey! 455 00:35:20,417 --> 00:35:23,042 I want their ears on a stick! 456 00:35:25,042 --> 00:35:27,000 Goddamn, I'm so tired. 457 00:35:28,917 --> 00:35:31,750 It's so beautiful over here. 458 00:35:35,875 --> 00:35:40,667 This can't be happening. You coming home this late. 459 00:35:41,375 --> 00:35:45,000 You didn't even bother to call and now you bring home a wild animal. 460 00:35:45,083 --> 00:35:46,042 What are you watching? 461 00:35:46,958 --> 00:35:48,333 Animal Planet. 462 00:35:50,625 --> 00:35:53,500 I won't have it. I don't care what kind of situation Roxi is in right now, 463 00:35:53,583 --> 00:35:57,375 but she's not moving in here with us. The same goes for Ana. 464 00:35:57,958 --> 00:36:00,917 -Why not? What's wrong with that? -Don't you get it? 465 00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:02,875 They want the house. 466 00:36:02,958 --> 00:36:05,125 They'll send us to a nursing home the first chance they get. 467 00:36:09,833 --> 00:36:13,375 How can you not remember where you parked your car?! 468 00:36:14,042 --> 00:36:17,458 My cello was in there, I swear if anything happens to it... 469 00:36:17,542 --> 00:36:19,958 Will you stop coughing on me already? 470 00:36:20,042 --> 00:36:25,667 I'm coughing to make you aware that there's an old lady next to you. 471 00:36:25,750 --> 00:36:28,833 I can barely stand up and I'm carrying these heavy bags. 472 00:36:28,917 --> 00:36:30,375 I'm pregnant, OK? 473 00:36:30,458 --> 00:36:33,208 Really, how far along are you? 474 00:36:33,292 --> 00:36:35,542 Half an hour and my legs are still shaking. 475 00:36:36,667 --> 00:36:39,167 Young people nowadays! 476 00:36:39,875 --> 00:36:41,792 What are you, 15? 477 00:36:41,875 --> 00:36:45,792 -Oh, fuck off already! I'm not 15. -16, tops... 478 00:36:47,958 --> 00:36:49,833 They don't have any kind of consideration, for anything. 479 00:36:49,917 --> 00:36:52,292 They have expensive cars. 480 00:36:53,167 --> 00:36:56,250 -Expensive clothes... -Stop it! 481 00:36:56,833 --> 00:36:58,458 I can't believe this. 482 00:36:58,542 --> 00:37:01,917 Why don't you just delete it?! I was drunk, for God's sake. 483 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,000 I want out. 484 00:37:04,083 --> 00:37:07,333 More than 600 in just half an hour and I'm supposed to delete it? Really? 485 00:37:07,417 --> 00:37:09,250 If you give up now, you're gonna lose everything. 486 00:37:09,333 --> 00:37:10,875 -Why did you get so drunk anyway? -Because of you. 487 00:37:10,958 --> 00:37:13,583 -Because of us... -Ana, a bet is a bet. 488 00:37:14,167 --> 00:37:18,833 We can go viral with this. Do you know what that means? 489 00:37:18,917 --> 00:37:22,000 Yeah, millions of people are gonna see us make a fool of ourselves. 490 00:37:31,292 --> 00:37:33,250 What am I gonna tell my dad? 491 00:37:39,958 --> 00:37:41,917 -Morning! -Bye! 492 00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:43,083 Daddy? 493 00:37:43,708 --> 00:37:45,917 -I need to tell you something. -No, Ana, we have to leave... 494 00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,125 -...for that urgent thing we have to do. -Now? No... I have to tell him. 495 00:37:53,292 --> 00:37:56,250 The girls and I made a bet to see who can get married first. 496 00:37:58,292 --> 00:37:59,625 I don't want to... 497 00:38:00,458 --> 00:38:01,833 Seriously? 498 00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:15,375 Great! Good for you! You don't have to live like two stray dogs anymore. 499 00:38:16,458 --> 00:38:20,958 -I think you owe me an explanation. -Mom, it's just a joke! 500 00:38:21,042 --> 00:38:23,292 Come on, Ana! 501 00:38:26,167 --> 00:38:27,208 Bye! 502 00:38:28,917 --> 00:38:31,417 Wait till I tell you what just happened, 503 00:38:31,500 --> 00:38:34,167 you're gonna fall on your ass when you hear this. 504 00:38:34,250 --> 00:38:36,875 The girls are getting married. 505 00:38:37,458 --> 00:38:39,917 They're finally leaving. 506 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,875 It's gonna be just us. 507 00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:54,583 HOW TO GET MARRIED IN THREE DAYS 508 00:38:54,667 --> 00:38:56,250 YOU GOTTA BE KIDDIN' ME! 509 00:38:58,625 --> 00:39:00,000 I WANT IN TOO! 510 00:39:00,542 --> 00:39:02,042 "NOT COOL, GUYS!" "HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE?" 511 00:39:02,125 --> 00:39:03,292 "SOMEONE HASN'T BEEN LAID IN A WHILE..." 512 00:39:03,375 --> 00:39:04,875 "GTFO!" "KISSES... YOU KNOW WHERE!" 513 00:39:11,875 --> 00:39:14,667 FREE ONLINE DATING 514 00:39:18,375 --> 00:39:20,042 Florin79, male, 36 years old 515 00:39:20,125 --> 00:39:21,417 -Hello. -Hi. 516 00:39:23,083 --> 00:39:24,333 Ana, you don't stand a chance! 517 00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:37,833 Hi, I'm Roxi and this is my self-portrait. 518 00:39:38,458 --> 00:39:42,083 This is research for my final term essay. 519 00:39:42,167 --> 00:39:45,375 I'm trying to find out two things. 520 00:39:45,458 --> 00:39:49,583 First of all, what marriage means for young people today. 521 00:39:49,667 --> 00:39:52,958 Secondly, I'm interested in what good can come 522 00:39:53,042 --> 00:39:56,125 from a night of partying drunk downtown. 523 00:39:58,083 --> 00:40:00,458 Yes, of course I'm sober, teach'. 524 00:40:00,542 --> 00:40:04,375 If you can still walk, because probably you've just been castrated... 525 00:40:05,333 --> 00:40:08,708 -I invite you to my wedding. -Wedding? You're insane. 526 00:40:11,167 --> 00:40:16,125 I've been thinking about you for months, but, um... 527 00:40:16,625 --> 00:40:18,167 You married who? 528 00:40:21,750 --> 00:40:23,917 None of the men I've been with compare to you. 529 00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:26,583 Marry me and I'll make sure you're happy every day for the rest of your life. 530 00:40:26,667 --> 00:40:30,792 I didn't leave you, I just didn't have the courage to answer your calls. 531 00:40:31,417 --> 00:40:34,792 I can be a virgin again just for you. 532 00:40:35,417 --> 00:40:39,042 You want me to do what? Keep dreaming. 533 00:40:40,208 --> 00:40:42,542 I mean a real wedding. 534 00:40:42,625 --> 00:40:45,125 With a godfather, music, your drunk mother dancing, the whole thing. 535 00:40:45,208 --> 00:40:47,125 You have a better idea...?! 536 00:40:47,208 --> 00:40:51,458 Who are you calling a whore?! I'm out of your Little Penis League. 537 00:40:59,292 --> 00:41:03,292 What's all this career talk? A woman's place is in the kitchen. 538 00:41:04,250 --> 00:41:05,333 What good is she if she can't cook?! 539 00:41:05,417 --> 00:41:07,292 I can give you anything your heart desires. 540 00:41:07,375 --> 00:41:09,250 Even the moon if that's what you want. 541 00:41:09,333 --> 00:41:12,875 Marriage?! No, thank you. 542 00:41:12,958 --> 00:41:16,250 Yeah, I'm okay with a woman working, 543 00:41:17,208 --> 00:41:20,542 but she should also make time to take care of the house. 544 00:41:20,625 --> 00:41:26,333 I... lost... my... parents... when... I... was... little. 545 00:41:26,417 --> 00:41:32,083 But I... want a big... family with many... kids. 546 00:41:33,458 --> 00:41:38,917 Baby, did you at least save a panda? Or paint a symphony? 547 00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:40,083 I want someone I can admire. 548 00:41:40,167 --> 00:41:43,958 A wife must fascinate you... each day in the long term. 549 00:41:44,667 --> 00:41:47,833 Otherwise, that toy you got between your legs... 550 00:41:47,917 --> 00:41:49,958 Every bitch has one of those. 551 00:41:50,042 --> 00:41:52,083 I already checked. 552 00:42:24,417 --> 00:42:27,167 Didn't your mother teach you not to leave your ID when you go to hookers? 553 00:42:28,667 --> 00:42:30,333 This picture is shit, but you're the guy alright. 554 00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,458 You got one minute to tell me where our girl is. 555 00:42:33,542 --> 00:42:37,250 -Countdown begins: 50... 49... -A minute has 60 seconds. 556 00:42:38,250 --> 00:42:42,000 I don't want to argue with you. Let's meet in the middle: 557 00:42:42,083 --> 00:42:46,042 -30... 29... -I don't know! I swear I don't know. 558 00:42:46,125 --> 00:42:48,625 You don't know, huh? 559 00:42:51,583 --> 00:42:56,333 -Longer you don't remember... -They left somewhere. 560 00:42:56,417 --> 00:42:58,208 I don't know! I swear I don't know. 561 00:42:58,292 --> 00:42:59,917 You really don't know? 562 00:43:07,708 --> 00:43:09,417 LOST ROCKET 563 00:43:14,208 --> 00:43:19,167 -My rocket! -Dare to call me a racketeer? 564 00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:25,417 -Does that hurt? Does it? -It does! 565 00:43:27,208 --> 00:43:29,167 Where's Iuliana, huh? 566 00:43:29,750 --> 00:43:30,667 -Where? -I don't know. 567 00:43:30,750 --> 00:43:34,250 You don't know, but you sure know how to run from us. 568 00:43:36,333 --> 00:43:39,042 Oops! Let's see... 569 00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:44,125 Well, well... 570 00:44:07,958 --> 00:44:09,375 Go to hell! 571 00:44:09,458 --> 00:44:11,208 Get it? Don't lower the price! 572 00:44:11,292 --> 00:44:12,833 Hold your horses! I'll be right there. 573 00:44:15,583 --> 00:44:18,667 You're late! I've been waiting for you. 574 00:44:18,750 --> 00:44:24,167 Get inside before these fuckers evil eye your ass. Get in! 575 00:44:25,042 --> 00:44:26,917 MOTHER EXILE CAN SOLVE ANYTHING! 576 00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:32,917 Sit on that chair right there. I just put a protection spell on it. Come on! 577 00:44:33,000 --> 00:44:38,167 Wake up, girl! Sit the hell down already! 578 00:44:39,208 --> 00:44:41,208 I've been waiting for you for so long. 579 00:44:41,292 --> 00:44:44,167 So, what do you need? 580 00:44:44,917 --> 00:44:49,167 Binding, unbinding, health, luck, what do you need? 581 00:44:49,250 --> 00:44:51,917 I made a bet and I need to get married. 582 00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:54,167 -You need to what? -Get married. 583 00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:59,583 For crying out loud! What do you have in that head of yours? 584 00:44:59,667 --> 00:45:03,875 What the fuck do they teach you in schools? 585 00:45:03,958 --> 00:45:06,000 Why the hell would you wanna do that? 586 00:45:06,083 --> 00:45:09,500 That's forbidden! It's forbidden! 587 00:45:09,583 --> 00:45:13,750 Marriages are binding spells. They're evil! 588 00:45:13,833 --> 00:45:14,917 What am I gonna do with you? 589 00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:16,750 You said you do spells. 590 00:45:16,833 --> 00:45:19,792 Of course I do spells. "Mother Exile can solve anything!" 591 00:45:19,875 --> 00:45:24,833 I have so much experience that even the police won't tie him better. Let's see. 592 00:45:24,917 --> 00:45:26,167 You got any money? 593 00:45:27,958 --> 00:45:31,625 How much you got? Let me see, otherwise my powers won't work. 594 00:45:31,708 --> 00:45:36,250 What's this? What the heck am I supposed to do with this?! 595 00:45:36,333 --> 00:45:39,083 This is about difficult marriage spells! 596 00:45:39,167 --> 00:45:44,875 -This is the price on your website. -For a binding wedding spell? 597 00:45:44,958 --> 00:45:46,667 It's gonna cost you way more than that. 598 00:45:46,750 --> 00:45:48,875 Do you take Visa? 599 00:45:48,958 --> 00:45:52,333 Up my cunt I do! What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? 600 00:45:52,417 --> 00:45:55,833 Sweet mother of... I can't believe you people. 601 00:45:55,917 --> 00:46:00,667 I'll tell you what: I'll cut a nice deal, just this once. 602 00:46:00,750 --> 00:46:02,833 This is for binding Not for unbinding 603 00:46:02,917 --> 00:46:05,917 Here I bind him to you With this woolen thread brand new 604 00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:10,500 Silence his sound Turn him round 605 00:46:10,583 --> 00:46:12,875 -What's his name? -Bogdan. 606 00:46:12,958 --> 00:46:14,875 Make Bogdan go numb. 607 00:46:14,958 --> 00:46:19,667 Keep him on the ground Keep him charmed around 608 00:46:19,750 --> 00:46:21,250 Three times third 609 00:46:22,458 --> 00:46:24,042 Spit here! 610 00:46:24,125 --> 00:46:27,000 Spit here already, that's how it's done! 611 00:46:28,542 --> 00:46:34,083 You trying to flood it?! This is how you spit? Never saw such spit! 612 00:46:34,167 --> 00:46:40,542 Just like cows seek salt, just like everyone seeks salt, 613 00:46:40,625 --> 00:46:42,167 may everyone seek Ana! 614 00:46:42,833 --> 00:46:44,917 Close those pretty eyes of yours! 615 00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:45,917 That's it! 616 00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:49,167 Keep them closed! You fucking stupid or what?! I'm gonna throw salt at you! 617 00:46:49,958 --> 00:46:52,375 So this salt here... You can open your eyes now, dumbass! 618 00:46:52,458 --> 00:46:57,292 Put this salt under your pillow. The spell is only worth the money you gave me. 619 00:46:57,375 --> 00:46:59,292 Wake the fuck up and listen! 620 00:46:59,375 --> 00:47:01,917 You take a right turn when you leave, next to the pawn shop, 621 00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:04,208 and ask for Danny Dustpan. 622 00:47:04,292 --> 00:47:05,417 Ask him for a white dove. 623 00:47:05,500 --> 00:47:06,708 -A white dove? -Yes. 624 00:47:06,792 --> 00:47:09,000 Tell him Mother Exile sent you. 625 00:47:09,083 --> 00:47:10,917 He'll give you an extra discount. 626 00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,750 He takes Visa, he has a pee-your-ass or what's it called... 627 00:47:13,833 --> 00:47:16,292 Off you go, I got other clients waiting. 628 00:47:16,375 --> 00:47:18,750 At this rate, I'm gonna go fucking bankrupt. 629 00:47:18,833 --> 00:47:21,000 Get your lazy ass out of my office. 630 00:47:37,292 --> 00:47:38,458 Hello? 631 00:47:44,833 --> 00:47:46,792 MONEY CAN BUY YOU LOVE: 50,000 EUR. 48 HOURS. 632 00:47:50,375 --> 00:47:52,000 What the fuck is going on here? 633 00:48:00,375 --> 00:48:04,375 He glued us together with Superglue. Fuck you and your brilliant ideas! 634 00:48:08,792 --> 00:48:12,167 Easy! He glued us together! 635 00:48:12,250 --> 00:48:14,625 How are we supposed to unglue ourselves?! 636 00:48:16,167 --> 00:48:19,417 Easy! Do it real gently! 637 00:48:19,500 --> 00:48:20,917 He glued us together! 638 00:48:21,875 --> 00:48:22,708 Sorry, I didn't mean to! 639 00:48:25,458 --> 00:48:26,292 Holy shit! 640 00:48:30,583 --> 00:48:34,708 Don't you fucking touch me! Bring a knife and scissors! 641 00:48:40,458 --> 00:48:43,083 Look, I wanna explain everything. 642 00:48:43,750 --> 00:48:47,208 Do you guys think those girls are there out of their own will?! 643 00:48:49,917 --> 00:48:51,958 What do you guys care?! 644 00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:56,083 You go there, have fun and off you go. 645 00:48:58,375 --> 00:49:00,083 Don't you have any sisters? 646 00:49:00,167 --> 00:49:01,875 Girlfriends? 647 00:49:03,833 --> 00:49:07,917 If it were them, what would you do? 648 00:49:10,917 --> 00:49:15,625 My plan was to come to Romania for a year as a babysitter, 649 00:49:16,125 --> 00:49:17,958 save up some money... 650 00:49:20,375 --> 00:49:24,708 Bring my little sister here and move to Germany. 651 00:49:26,250 --> 00:49:28,000 When I first came here, 652 00:49:30,667 --> 00:49:32,042 they locked me up, 653 00:49:33,750 --> 00:49:37,625 they tore up my clothes and they beat me. 654 00:49:40,458 --> 00:49:42,125 After a few days, 655 00:49:44,458 --> 00:49:48,583 they told me "good life is gonna cost you, but here's a job. 656 00:49:48,667 --> 00:49:50,625 Come on, be a business girl." 657 00:49:57,708 --> 00:49:59,833 I found out last night what that job was. 658 00:50:02,167 --> 00:50:04,917 You were my second client. 659 00:50:07,208 --> 00:50:12,542 I've heard that one before. "You were my second..." 660 00:50:14,500 --> 00:50:16,000 I'm sorry, but... 661 00:50:17,875 --> 00:50:21,292 You have to go back and talk this through with them. 662 00:50:21,375 --> 00:50:24,750 You stupid or what? Don't you get it, I lov... 663 00:50:26,208 --> 00:50:28,750 -You lost it, bro! -Mihai... 664 00:50:28,833 --> 00:50:32,792 Myself, I'm in love with my teeth. 665 00:50:34,500 --> 00:50:36,625 How the hell did I end up with the two of you as friends? 666 00:50:40,042 --> 00:50:43,708 We have to pay them, no doubt about it. 667 00:50:46,375 --> 00:50:51,000 I've got an idea, we can rob a bank or two, or even more if we have to. 668 00:50:51,708 --> 00:50:53,583 They're gonna go bankrupt anyway. 669 00:50:53,667 --> 00:50:55,958 Or we can just go to them with her and talk to them. 670 00:50:57,333 --> 00:50:59,708 Yes, but not with her. 671 00:51:01,458 --> 00:51:02,333 With money. 672 00:51:03,625 --> 00:51:04,583 At least some... 673 00:51:06,458 --> 00:51:08,708 As much as we can find. 674 00:51:08,792 --> 00:51:13,042 We'll ask for a monthly rate, we'll negotiate, but we won't give up. 675 00:51:13,792 --> 00:51:15,042 Please. 676 00:51:15,625 --> 00:51:18,208 Fuck me, he's in love now. 677 00:51:19,792 --> 00:51:22,583 For the first time. He was a virgin only in his soul. 678 00:51:22,667 --> 00:51:24,292 Excellent! 679 00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:36,458 Can I offer you a five-star drink? A coffee maybe? 680 00:51:36,542 --> 00:51:38,042 I sure hope you can. 681 00:51:43,167 --> 00:51:45,292 Let's get to know each other better. 682 00:51:45,958 --> 00:51:47,583 What do you think about marriage? 683 00:51:58,708 --> 00:52:02,667 Theoretically, I don't care about marriage. 684 00:52:03,833 --> 00:52:04,792 But practically... 685 00:52:28,083 --> 00:52:31,250 Did you make a bet with your friends, which of you bones me first tonight? 686 00:52:31,958 --> 00:52:37,750 -It's not what you think... -Don't worry, I like a good bet. 687 00:52:37,833 --> 00:52:42,875 Here's the deal: we tell them it was love at first sight 688 00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:46,125 and tomorrow we get married. 689 00:52:56,583 --> 00:52:58,958 Nobody's gonna believe us. 690 00:52:59,042 --> 00:53:01,583 Oh, yes they will. Because we're actually going to do it. 691 00:53:02,625 --> 00:53:03,917 Drink up! 692 00:53:22,042 --> 00:53:24,333 You just have to pay for the marriage registration. 693 00:53:26,792 --> 00:53:29,000 It's up to you. 694 00:53:29,083 --> 00:53:30,625 Up to me... 695 00:53:31,792 --> 00:53:33,042 Alright, I do. 696 00:53:41,083 --> 00:53:43,792 Here we are again. The oldest trick in the book. 697 00:53:45,125 --> 00:53:46,958 With what you make selling perfumes, 698 00:53:47,542 --> 00:53:49,875 we'd cover the payment in about 50 years. 699 00:53:50,875 --> 00:53:52,292 Isn't this dangerous? 700 00:53:52,375 --> 00:53:54,417 Only if the cops catch us. 701 00:53:55,167 --> 00:54:00,292 Mihai's been doing this for years, there's nothing to worry about. 702 00:54:00,375 --> 00:54:01,458 He's exaggerating. 703 00:54:02,458 --> 00:54:05,333 We've only done it once or twice just for fun. 704 00:54:06,167 --> 00:54:10,083 Mihai was a poor kid while growing up. 705 00:54:11,917 --> 00:54:14,792 And he's the romantic type. 706 00:54:15,333 --> 00:54:17,458 He acts like a tough guy only to protect himself. 707 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:22,458 -What about girls? -Girls? 708 00:54:23,292 --> 00:54:26,917 What girls? He's never been with any girl. You're the first. 709 00:54:56,708 --> 00:54:58,625 He plants tulips in front of his apartment. 710 00:54:58,708 --> 00:55:01,875 -He recycles, adopts cats. -Paints the fences green. 711 00:55:01,958 --> 00:55:04,625 -Cats? -He has seven cats! 712 00:55:04,708 --> 00:55:07,208 Iulia, I'm telling you, he's a great guy. 713 00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:13,250 Did you see the ass on that bitch? The one with the Mercedes. 714 00:55:15,042 --> 00:55:16,917 This is how you speak in front of a lady? 715 00:55:17,000 --> 00:55:20,250 That stupid bitch is the one from the elevator. 716 00:55:20,333 --> 00:55:22,625 -The one that double-crossed me. -You high or what?! 717 00:55:22,708 --> 00:55:25,250 That one had short hair. This one's a red head with long hair. 718 00:55:25,333 --> 00:55:27,750 Wigs, make-up, girly magic, mister magician. 719 00:55:29,375 --> 00:55:30,208 Look! 720 00:55:42,125 --> 00:55:44,750 Fellas, the one right there is all we need. 721 00:55:44,833 --> 00:55:46,667 What's that supposed to mean? 722 00:55:46,750 --> 00:55:50,292 I just know the chick. There's nothing going on between us. 723 00:55:50,375 --> 00:55:53,708 -But there's gonna be. -Really? I'm getting out! 724 00:55:53,792 --> 00:55:55,500 What are you doing? Come on! 725 00:55:55,583 --> 00:55:57,625 -Are you nuts? -Enough! 726 00:55:58,167 --> 00:56:00,083 She's all you need... 727 00:56:09,333 --> 00:56:10,417 Take this! 728 00:56:29,125 --> 00:56:31,625 -DID YOU FIND YOUR FOOL? -EPIC, DUDES! 729 00:56:31,708 --> 00:56:33,375 I WANNA GET MARRIED TOO! 730 00:56:33,458 --> 00:56:34,833 I'LL BELIEVE IT WHEN I SEE IT... 731 00:57:31,875 --> 00:57:33,375 Are you hurt? 732 00:57:34,667 --> 00:57:36,000 We're fucking rich! 733 00:57:36,083 --> 00:57:37,750 Oh, he's hurt alright. 734 00:57:38,917 --> 00:57:41,375 Just a second, please. To see where she is. 735 00:57:41,458 --> 00:57:44,125 This isn't the time for that. 736 00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:50,625 How can you be so relaxed when our girls are about to ruin their lives? 737 00:58:18,208 --> 00:58:22,875 Listen up, I'm gonna have a serious talk with the both of them tomorrow. 738 00:58:22,958 --> 00:58:24,292 That's great! 739 00:58:24,375 --> 00:58:28,083 -It better be a very serious talk. -Yeah! 740 00:58:28,167 --> 00:58:32,250 -You'll talk to Roxi... -Yeah! 741 00:58:32,333 --> 00:58:34,708 And I'll talk to... 742 00:58:36,042 --> 00:58:37,750 Aaa... na. 743 00:58:38,708 --> 00:58:40,250 Got it? 744 00:58:41,292 --> 00:58:46,250 Hello? Yes? Oh, nothing much. I was just reading something. 745 00:58:47,292 --> 00:58:49,833 Can I call you back in an hour? 746 00:58:50,458 --> 00:58:52,792 Better make that two hours. 747 00:58:52,875 --> 00:58:54,708 OK, thanks. Bye! 748 00:58:55,792 --> 00:58:57,875 -Who was that? -I don't know. 749 00:59:00,417 --> 00:59:01,792 Hello. 750 00:59:06,250 --> 00:59:10,000 -Where's that book I was looking for? -It's here. 751 00:59:10,083 --> 00:59:12,208 Sorry. 752 00:59:13,042 --> 00:59:16,250 Right there, under your pillow. 753 00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:39,167 They're with weed. 754 00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:42,875 Of course they are, they're organic. 755 00:59:42,958 --> 00:59:44,708 A little something to give you some energy. 756 00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:53,000 I even gave some to Roxi. 757 01:00:19,583 --> 01:00:22,708 -Do we know each other? -On the outside or the inside? 758 01:00:25,292 --> 01:00:26,750 The phone... 759 01:00:27,833 --> 01:00:29,292 My phone is ringing. 760 01:00:30,583 --> 01:00:33,333 -I don't hear anything. -It's vibrating. 761 01:00:36,208 --> 01:00:37,792 It's not the phone. 762 01:00:37,875 --> 01:00:39,708 Please don't tell me you used that. 763 01:00:39,792 --> 01:00:43,167 No, we used it together. 764 01:00:45,958 --> 01:00:48,167 Is there anyone else here? 765 01:00:48,250 --> 01:00:51,000 No, but it would've been a great idea. 766 01:00:52,750 --> 01:00:54,250 Get the fuck out! 767 01:00:55,125 --> 01:00:58,542 What? Seriously?! You're kicking me out? 768 01:00:58,625 --> 01:00:59,583 Leave! 769 01:01:01,292 --> 01:01:04,667 -This isn't just about sex, you know. -Are you stupid? I said, get out! 770 01:01:05,208 --> 01:01:08,542 Oh, boy... Last night was a totally different story... 771 01:01:08,625 --> 01:01:10,667 I said get out already! 772 01:01:13,917 --> 01:01:15,833 Didn't your mother teach you how to treat your guests? 773 01:01:15,917 --> 01:01:19,958 Leave, you stupid bitch! Do I have to fucking ask you nicely? 774 01:01:42,833 --> 01:01:43,667 A gift! 775 01:01:46,000 --> 01:01:50,833 What happened to you that made you want to take it out on people like this? 776 01:01:50,917 --> 01:01:54,750 OK, it was nice, but I like men and this right here is ruining my reputation. 777 01:02:09,250 --> 01:02:10,458 You guys hungry? 778 01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:14,042 That's just what I'm looking for. People who are starving! 779 01:02:14,958 --> 01:02:19,708 Today we'll have a feast. 780 01:02:19,792 --> 01:02:22,333 You'll make such a nice steak! 781 01:02:22,417 --> 01:02:24,458 I say we make some meatballs out of this one. 782 01:02:25,083 --> 01:02:30,833 No need to jump to conclusions. Let's see what he has to say. 783 01:02:30,917 --> 01:02:33,083 Come on! Take a seat, boy. 784 01:02:33,167 --> 01:02:34,667 Sit, sit. 785 01:02:34,750 --> 01:02:37,042 You dogs wait here! 786 01:02:40,250 --> 01:02:46,167 I don't see the girl with you. Don't tell me you've got 50,000 on you? 787 01:02:47,333 --> 01:02:51,458 Hey, turd! Why don't you help us out and give these small ones a turn? 788 01:02:52,625 --> 01:02:55,917 I'm not good with grilling. I'm good with jokes, you know. 789 01:02:56,000 --> 01:03:00,708 I do tricks. Here, let me show you. 790 01:03:01,417 --> 01:03:02,958 One moment, please. 791 01:03:03,625 --> 01:03:05,417 We take this soda... 792 01:03:07,292 --> 01:03:09,625 And suddenly... 793 01:03:12,667 --> 01:03:17,667 Look, loser, I'm the one with the happy ending in this picture. 794 01:03:19,042 --> 01:03:23,250 If they're rare, you'll be getting rare too, you hear me? 795 01:03:23,333 --> 01:03:27,542 If they get burned, you get burned! 796 01:03:29,458 --> 01:03:31,083 Take one! 797 01:03:31,167 --> 01:03:36,583 Take one, chew it well and explain why you're here. 798 01:03:36,667 --> 01:03:38,333 Before I lose my temper. 799 01:03:39,250 --> 01:03:40,292 You wouldn't want that to happen. 800 01:03:41,083 --> 01:03:43,125 I'm gonna break the teeth of this dumbass. 801 01:03:43,208 --> 01:03:46,167 Let's not rush into things. He's better at grilling. 802 01:03:46,250 --> 01:03:47,250 -Oh, yeah? -Yeah. 803 01:03:47,333 --> 01:03:49,625 Let's see you work your magic, pretty-face. 804 01:03:49,708 --> 01:03:50,542 Move! 805 01:03:52,750 --> 01:03:54,958 We want them nice and juicy. 806 01:03:59,708 --> 01:04:02,167 -Come on! -No! This is my rocket! 807 01:04:02,875 --> 01:04:03,792 Give them a turn! 808 01:04:04,792 --> 01:04:06,792 How's 100,000 sound? 809 01:04:10,292 --> 01:04:12,208 I'd have to say... 810 01:04:36,875 --> 01:04:38,875 10 GRAMS OF WEED AND I'LL MARRY YOU. 811 01:04:41,167 --> 01:04:43,875 DEAL! WHERE DO WE MEET? 812 01:04:47,667 --> 01:04:49,125 MEET ME AT 9:00 IN P3. LOVE, YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND. 813 01:04:51,458 --> 01:04:54,583 "DO YOU DO BLOWJOBS?" "PROBLEM?" "CALL ME, I'M HORNY!" 814 01:04:54,667 --> 01:04:56,917 "HEAVEN FORBID!" "GET YOUR LAZY ASSES TO WORK!" 815 01:05:09,708 --> 01:05:10,875 Hey! 816 01:05:22,667 --> 01:05:23,958 What have you been up to? 817 01:05:26,000 --> 01:05:28,750 I've been working so hard lately. 818 01:05:32,667 --> 01:05:35,000 The rocket is ready! 819 01:05:38,917 --> 01:05:40,417 What happened to you? 820 01:05:41,333 --> 01:05:44,083 Elvis hit my head on the table. 821 01:06:01,167 --> 01:06:06,125 You smell funny. Like barbecue. 822 01:06:06,667 --> 01:06:09,250 Did you have fun with the girls? 823 01:06:09,333 --> 01:06:11,125 No, not really. 824 01:06:11,208 --> 01:06:17,083 Roxi is devastated. They had such a beautiful thing going on. 825 01:06:17,917 --> 01:06:22,958 -You know, I was thinking... -Yes? 826 01:06:23,042 --> 01:06:27,500 ...about what we could do to avoid such a situation... 827 01:06:28,542 --> 01:06:29,375 Really? 828 01:06:31,000 --> 01:06:32,083 How? 829 01:06:35,792 --> 01:06:38,375 We love each other, don't we? 830 01:06:40,000 --> 01:06:41,417 And... 831 01:06:45,667 --> 01:06:49,083 I want to be with you for the rest of my life. 832 01:06:54,875 --> 01:06:56,333 And... 833 01:06:59,125 --> 01:07:05,125 Maybe we're ready to take the next big step. 834 01:07:11,958 --> 01:07:13,417 I think... 835 01:07:15,917 --> 01:07:18,792 we should... 836 01:07:20,042 --> 01:07:23,250 let things take their natural course. 837 01:08:47,833 --> 01:08:52,833 Guess what? Ana's getting married! No, not that one! I mean our Ana! 838 01:08:54,083 --> 01:08:56,958 With Obama! Beats me, with her boyfriend probably. 839 01:08:59,125 --> 01:09:00,958 That's great! 840 01:09:01,042 --> 01:09:03,917 Nothing much, you know, we're doing alright, 841 01:09:04,000 --> 01:09:06,250 we could use some money though, if you have any... 842 01:09:06,333 --> 01:09:09,458 Don't give me that! You know, the money you've got hidden in your old socks! 843 01:09:17,250 --> 01:09:20,167 Reading from John's Sacred Gospel. 844 01:09:20,708 --> 01:09:24,208 To the Jews who had believed Him, Jesus said... 845 01:09:30,708 --> 01:09:36,833 "Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word... 846 01:09:38,208 --> 01:09:40,333 and believes him who sent me 847 01:09:40,417 --> 01:09:43,750 has eternal life and will not be judged, 848 01:09:46,000 --> 01:09:48,833 but has crossed over from death to life. 849 01:09:48,917 --> 01:09:51,667 For as the Father has life in himself, 850 01:09:51,750 --> 01:09:56,500 so he has granted the Son also to have life in himself." 851 01:09:56,583 --> 01:09:58,833 Hi, are you here alone? 852 01:10:02,000 --> 01:10:04,208 Mommy, who's this lady? 853 01:10:04,875 --> 01:10:06,458 Who's this? 854 01:10:07,958 --> 01:10:08,958 Who's this? 855 01:10:11,708 --> 01:10:13,583 She just came out of the blue and sat next to me. 856 01:10:13,667 --> 01:10:16,042 Who are you and why are you touching my husband? 857 01:10:16,125 --> 01:10:18,958 Oh, I just felt a little dizzy, that's all. 858 01:10:19,042 --> 01:10:20,042 Sure... 859 01:10:21,208 --> 01:10:24,625 Dear Lord, what kind of a woman hits on a married man at a funeral?! 860 01:10:25,667 --> 01:10:31,792 "My judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me." 861 01:10:34,250 --> 01:10:37,792 -How can you be so rude? -What are you talking about? 862 01:10:37,875 --> 01:10:39,917 -I saw you! -What did I do?! 863 01:10:40,000 --> 01:10:41,500 Keep it in your pants, will you? 864 01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:46,917 "Do not be amazed at this... 865 01:10:53,292 --> 01:10:55,583 for a time is coming... 866 01:10:57,833 --> 01:11:00,250 and come out... 867 01:11:04,208 --> 01:11:06,750 My Father who sent me." 868 01:11:09,875 --> 01:11:11,792 I hacked their alarm system. 869 01:11:15,583 --> 01:11:18,500 I don't know what we're gonna do about this furry fella. 870 01:11:20,583 --> 01:11:21,750 He has no software to hack. 871 01:11:21,833 --> 01:11:25,208 You're just too smart to know. Sleeping pills, bro! 872 01:11:26,917 --> 01:11:30,333 Don't touch that, please! Magi got it for Roxi. 873 01:11:30,417 --> 01:11:34,333 Dude, we're not allowed to touch anything in this freaking house! 874 01:11:36,750 --> 01:11:38,292 Why don't you make something for a change? 875 01:11:38,375 --> 01:11:39,208 I will. 876 01:11:40,208 --> 01:11:41,625 Make yourself useful! 877 01:11:41,708 --> 01:11:46,958 I'll tell Iulia to teach Ana some relaxation methods. 878 01:11:47,042 --> 01:11:48,333 Get my point? 879 01:11:49,250 --> 01:11:50,833 Ana proposed to me. 880 01:11:51,750 --> 01:11:53,042 Say what?! 881 01:11:54,042 --> 01:11:59,333 It's even worse. The three of them made a bet. Who gets married first. 882 01:11:59,417 --> 01:12:00,458 No way! 883 01:12:00,542 --> 01:12:01,583 Who's getting married? 884 01:12:04,208 --> 01:12:05,375 What are you doing? 885 01:12:05,458 --> 01:12:10,042 He's gonna flip when he hears this. We can't do this without him. 886 01:12:10,125 --> 01:12:13,208 -We've got to tell... -Just shut the fuck up, okay? 887 01:12:14,792 --> 01:12:16,125 It's me, I'm getting "spoused." 888 01:12:16,750 --> 01:12:20,667 You wanna say you're getting married. And put that champagne back. 889 01:12:21,458 --> 01:12:23,000 The apple too! 890 01:12:39,625 --> 01:12:42,250 Just like Sharapova in the third set. 891 01:12:49,708 --> 01:12:53,875 I want more movement when we get to the "voleo." 892 01:12:53,958 --> 01:13:00,208 This one and this one have to go all the way. Come on! 893 01:14:03,208 --> 01:14:04,542 Princess Roxana? 894 01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:13,000 So here's the deal: I'll let you do stuff to me... 895 01:14:15,042 --> 01:14:16,167 and you'll marry me. 896 01:14:17,750 --> 01:14:19,042 Do you really not recognize me? 897 01:14:22,458 --> 01:14:24,792 First marriage on the forum. You don't see that every day! 898 01:14:27,292 --> 01:14:30,458 I found you crying in the elevator. You were failing in history. 899 01:14:30,542 --> 01:14:33,750 I helped you make scraps of paper for the exam about Michael the Brave. 900 01:14:35,917 --> 01:14:40,458 You impressed your teacher, you went off with him and forgot all about me. 901 01:14:48,458 --> 01:14:51,250 If you get me this stuff every week, 902 01:14:52,292 --> 01:14:55,042 we can be whatever you want us to be. 903 01:14:57,458 --> 01:14:59,208 When your father hit the jackpot and you guys moved, 904 01:14:59,292 --> 01:15:02,208 you gave me a phone number. I called and it was a pharmacy... 905 01:15:03,042 --> 01:15:06,625 Those years were tough on me too. But now I'm cool. 906 01:15:09,208 --> 01:15:11,250 We can get married. 907 01:15:22,083 --> 01:15:23,625 Drink up, my wife! 908 01:15:23,708 --> 01:15:26,208 -Congratulations on our marriage! -That's right! 909 01:15:27,750 --> 01:15:31,417 Such a beautiful love story deserves a happy ending. 910 01:15:34,792 --> 01:15:36,917 When did Michael the Brave rule? 911 01:15:41,083 --> 01:15:44,333 Yasmine, ending up with a whore isn't a happy ending. 912 01:15:45,250 --> 01:15:46,708 It's social work. 913 01:16:07,542 --> 01:16:08,750 ROOM 69 914 01:16:10,833 --> 01:16:11,958 Wanna know why I'm so lucky? 915 01:16:13,917 --> 01:16:15,542 These young men just don't know how to treat a woman. 916 01:16:22,417 --> 01:16:23,375 Get out, snotty face! 917 01:16:23,458 --> 01:16:26,542 My father's an army general, he'll make sure you rot in jail! 918 01:16:26,625 --> 01:16:29,208 Even with your mouth full, you still won't stop yapping about marriage! 919 01:16:30,583 --> 01:16:32,125 Fuck off! 920 01:16:33,083 --> 01:16:36,375 Two million slaves and I can't find a man. 921 01:16:36,458 --> 01:16:39,875 Fuck this shit hole of Bucharest city! 922 01:16:45,375 --> 01:16:46,250 Roxi! 923 01:16:51,708 --> 01:16:54,833 -Did you drug her? -We didn't give her anything. 924 01:17:04,208 --> 01:17:05,958 Just tell me what the hell you gave her! 925 01:17:06,042 --> 01:17:08,500 -Calm down! -Hey! Shut up! 926 01:17:08,583 --> 01:17:11,708 Nothing bad is going to happen, OK? We're just taking you home. 927 01:17:21,875 --> 01:17:24,708 When my dad opens the door, just keep your heads down. 928 01:17:26,792 --> 01:17:28,250 Did you hear me? 929 01:17:31,458 --> 01:17:34,583 Just say: Sir, yes, Sir! 930 01:17:34,667 --> 01:17:37,917 Just chill, will you? You'll wake up the dogs. 931 01:17:38,000 --> 01:17:40,750 Say you're sorry for causing such an inconvenience 932 01:17:41,542 --> 01:17:43,083 and then you get the fuck out of here! 933 01:17:43,167 --> 01:17:46,542 Alright already, at least we don't have to kiss his hand... 934 01:17:48,167 --> 01:17:50,125 Sir, yes, sir! 935 01:17:50,208 --> 01:17:51,458 Ana, what did we say about coming home late? 936 01:17:52,167 --> 01:17:54,042 Everybody head home. Thank you, boys. 937 01:17:54,125 --> 01:17:55,667 -Good evening, sir. -Whatever. 938 01:17:55,750 --> 01:17:57,625 Sorry for the inconvenience. It was an honor. 939 01:17:57,708 --> 01:17:58,958 All the best. 940 01:17:59,042 --> 01:18:04,833 Look at this one! She fell while thinking? What's up with her?! Get in! 941 01:18:04,917 --> 01:18:08,167 Was she plowing all night? Tilling the land? Must have worked really hard. 942 01:18:08,250 --> 01:18:11,208 -She's not feeling so well. -Oh, really? Get your ass in here! 943 01:18:40,250 --> 01:18:43,208 I really don't know why we girls have to be so perfect. 944 01:18:46,875 --> 01:18:48,667 I used to be chubbier. 945 01:18:50,750 --> 01:18:55,167 Why do we have to look like those cover girls anyway? 946 01:18:56,208 --> 01:18:57,292 I don't want to be like Yasmine. 947 01:19:00,708 --> 01:19:02,250 I really don't. 948 01:19:03,750 --> 01:19:05,042 I want to be me. 949 01:19:20,458 --> 01:19:25,083 "DEEPLY TOUCHING!" "I HOPE YOU FIND YOUR SOULMATE!" "NICE TITTIES!" 950 01:19:31,958 --> 01:19:33,500 What does BF mean? 951 01:19:35,292 --> 01:19:36,667 And XOXO? 952 01:19:37,750 --> 01:19:40,167 I mean an X and an O and another X and an O. 953 01:19:40,250 --> 01:19:42,250 That's not how you read it! 954 01:19:42,917 --> 01:19:45,375 That's how you write it. 955 01:19:45,458 --> 01:19:48,375 It means "hugs and kisses." 956 01:19:48,958 --> 01:19:52,250 You know, hugs and kisses, hugs and kisses. 957 01:19:52,333 --> 01:19:55,875 Why don't you just say it like that then? Hug then kiss, hug then kiss. 958 01:19:57,333 --> 01:19:59,708 Because I ain't got the time for all that, duh! 959 01:20:01,250 --> 01:20:02,292 What about YOLO? 960 01:20:05,375 --> 01:20:10,958 Which means: Carpe diem. That way, Mr. Ceausu will also get it if he asks. 961 01:20:11,042 --> 01:20:14,250 -That's so nice. -Yeah... 962 01:20:14,875 --> 01:20:20,292 See that's why you shouldn't jump into things when you're very young... 963 01:20:22,125 --> 01:20:23,333 What about blowjo'? 964 01:20:30,792 --> 01:20:33,042 -Mom! -What?! 965 01:20:33,125 --> 01:20:35,333 -Not so loud! -Did I say it wrong? 966 01:20:37,375 --> 01:20:40,000 -It's blowjob. -Blowjob. 967 01:20:40,083 --> 01:20:41,083 Exactly. 968 01:20:41,167 --> 01:20:45,375 It's, well, when a girl does it with her mouth... you know. 969 01:20:49,583 --> 01:20:50,958 Oh, fellatio! 970 01:20:51,042 --> 01:20:52,375 C'mon! 971 01:20:52,458 --> 01:20:55,958 Why don't you just say so? What's the big deal? 972 01:20:57,583 --> 01:20:59,458 Listen... 973 01:21:00,000 --> 01:21:01,500 What if you're wearing braces? 974 01:21:02,333 --> 01:21:05,000 -Mom, come on! -I'm just curious. 975 01:21:05,625 --> 01:21:08,833 You're traumatizing me, seriously, just drop it, please. 976 01:21:12,583 --> 01:21:15,500 Alright, do you know what a bitch is? 977 01:21:15,583 --> 01:21:18,500 A stuck up girl who refuses to perform fellatio. 978 01:21:18,583 --> 01:21:19,417 Hey! 979 01:21:22,125 --> 01:21:26,042 What's with this attitude? I didn't raise you to talk like that! 980 01:21:26,667 --> 01:21:28,292 Apparently you did. 981 01:21:40,000 --> 01:21:43,833 Can we talk about this bet you girls made? Please, Roxana! 982 01:21:44,542 --> 01:21:46,667 It's alright if you lose. 983 01:21:47,583 --> 01:21:50,000 You don't have to ruin your life with the first guy that shows up. 984 01:21:52,917 --> 01:21:53,958 Honey? 985 01:21:55,333 --> 01:21:59,500 -Why did you break up with Magi? -He just left. 986 01:21:59,583 --> 01:22:02,708 He left? Really? What an idiot! 987 01:22:08,333 --> 01:22:11,083 When you love a man who loves you back, 988 01:22:12,333 --> 01:22:14,333 you don't just let him leave. 989 01:22:16,000 --> 01:22:17,667 You keep him. 990 01:22:26,042 --> 01:22:27,875 What did I say now?! 991 01:22:27,958 --> 01:22:31,208 YOLO, mom! Carpe diem! 992 01:22:47,208 --> 01:22:48,500 Look at this one! 993 01:22:48,583 --> 01:22:52,042 You're better off on the side of the road, honey! 994 01:22:52,125 --> 01:22:55,250 Up yours, you dumb fucking bitches! 995 01:22:58,333 --> 01:23:02,458 Yasmine, are you OK? 996 01:23:04,833 --> 01:23:08,708 No, I'm not. Nobody wants to marry me. 997 01:23:08,792 --> 01:23:10,542 Ana and Bogdan can't get enough of each other 998 01:23:10,625 --> 01:23:12,083 and Roxi says she's spoiled for choice. 999 01:23:12,708 --> 01:23:14,917 Spoiled for choice? What do you mean? 1000 01:23:16,000 --> 01:23:18,917 They're both getting married today and I'm left... 1001 01:23:19,458 --> 01:23:20,750 They're both what? 1002 01:23:20,833 --> 01:23:22,833 They're gonna win the bet! What don't you get? 1003 01:23:22,917 --> 01:23:25,458 We made a bet: who gets married first in three days. 1004 01:23:27,667 --> 01:23:29,167 Roxi wants to get married? 1005 01:23:29,250 --> 01:23:31,833 Yes! What's the fucking novelty in that? 1006 01:23:37,083 --> 01:23:38,750 Where are you going? 1007 01:23:40,583 --> 01:23:42,000 You wanker! 1008 01:24:24,292 --> 01:24:26,708 Hello, is Roxi home? I need to see her. 1009 01:24:26,792 --> 01:24:28,542 As a parent, you come to understand so many things. 1010 01:24:28,625 --> 01:24:30,333 There's really no point in getting angry. 1011 01:24:30,417 --> 01:24:36,000 You don't understand. I love her! I love her and I want to marry her. 1012 01:24:37,000 --> 01:24:40,292 Thank you for the flowers. I was actually worried I wouldn't find any. Let's go. 1013 01:24:41,917 --> 01:24:47,083 Look, if you can get some weed, I'll put in a good word for you. 1014 01:25:57,208 --> 01:25:58,125 FOR THE DOG! 1015 01:26:09,792 --> 01:26:11,542 Would you be willing to donate seven drops of blood for me? 1016 01:26:21,083 --> 01:26:22,625 Not in the sink! 1017 01:26:25,375 --> 01:26:26,708 No! 1018 01:26:46,417 --> 01:26:50,417 -Hi there, honey! -You're here... First! 1019 01:26:50,500 --> 01:26:52,583 You're letting us wait at the door? 1020 01:26:53,583 --> 01:26:56,000 This place is so nice! 1021 01:26:56,083 --> 01:27:00,083 -Do I smell burned plastic? -Um, why don't you take a seat? 1022 01:27:00,167 --> 01:27:03,792 -We will. -I just need a second in the kitchen. 1023 01:27:03,875 --> 01:27:05,958 Look what I got for you! 1024 01:27:06,042 --> 01:27:08,708 You wouldn't believe how long it took me to find the perfect bouquet! 1025 01:27:08,792 --> 01:27:10,625 -Do you like them? -Yes, I do. 1026 01:27:10,708 --> 01:27:11,708 So do I. 1027 01:27:11,792 --> 01:27:13,500 What is she making? Cabbage stew? 1028 01:27:15,708 --> 01:27:16,542 Come on! 1029 01:27:18,375 --> 01:27:20,583 That must be them! Or maybe it's the mail man. 1030 01:27:20,667 --> 01:27:23,917 Or the owner asking for the rent. Maybe she didn't pay the rent. 1031 01:27:24,000 --> 01:27:27,000 -I'm Bogdan's mother. -I'm Ana, nice to meet you. 1032 01:27:27,083 --> 01:27:30,292 -I'm Bogdan's father. -Nice to meet you. 1033 01:27:30,375 --> 01:27:33,625 The mother of Stephen the Great. I just remembered that poem. 1034 01:27:33,708 --> 01:27:36,375 -These are my parents, my dad... -Bogdan's mother. 1035 01:27:36,458 --> 01:27:38,583 -Nice to meet you. -And Cecilia. 1036 01:27:38,667 --> 01:27:41,375 -Bogdan's mother. -Cecilia. Nice to meet you. 1037 01:27:41,458 --> 01:27:43,625 Bogdan's father. 1038 01:27:45,000 --> 01:27:47,042 I'm Ana's father. 1039 01:27:47,750 --> 01:27:49,542 I'm Bogdan's father. 1040 01:27:49,625 --> 01:27:52,958 OK, I get it, I just thought... you thought I was Bogdan's father. 1041 01:27:53,042 --> 01:27:55,167 -Oh, no. -Oh, dear, we're all so nervous already. 1042 01:27:55,250 --> 01:28:00,583 Please excuse me. I just need to finish up in the kitchen. I'll be right back. 1043 01:28:02,208 --> 01:28:04,750 Please make yourselves comfortable. 1044 01:28:07,292 --> 01:28:08,958 What about this weather we're having? 1045 01:28:09,042 --> 01:28:11,167 Where the heck is he?! 1046 01:28:12,458 --> 01:28:14,625 The weather is nice, I like it. 1047 01:28:16,708 --> 01:28:17,792 Isn't it? 1048 01:28:20,375 --> 01:28:23,375 -It took us... How long to get here? -Half an hour. 1049 01:28:23,458 --> 01:28:26,250 Half an hour to get here. How long did it take you? 1050 01:28:27,958 --> 01:28:29,875 We drove here from our home... 1051 01:28:29,958 --> 01:28:32,792 Râmnicu Vâlcea. Yes, I know. How long did it take you? To get here, I mean. 1052 01:28:32,875 --> 01:28:37,750 -Longer than we expected actually... -Really, how so? 1053 01:28:37,833 --> 01:28:41,667 -We took the highway... -How come? Did you make a pit stop? 1054 01:28:41,750 --> 01:28:45,083 -We got lost. -Not even to take a pee? 1055 01:28:45,167 --> 01:28:50,042 You already took care of that at home, didn't you? What road did you take? 1056 01:28:50,667 --> 01:28:53,000 -The straight road... -The straight road, of course. 1057 01:28:53,083 --> 01:28:54,250 Good call. 1058 01:28:54,333 --> 01:28:58,875 Look what we have here! 1059 01:28:58,958 --> 01:29:03,417 Not even one bone in there! 1060 01:29:04,208 --> 01:29:05,875 I don't get their jokes. 1061 01:29:35,000 --> 01:29:36,583 What's your name, young lady? 1062 01:29:38,958 --> 01:29:40,417 Yasmine. 1063 01:29:42,667 --> 01:29:44,708 How old are you, young lady? 1064 01:29:48,458 --> 01:29:49,458 Twenty. 1065 01:29:50,250 --> 01:29:53,208 Oh, you're still a little girl. You're allowed to cry. 1066 01:29:54,750 --> 01:29:56,708 Close your eyes and cry. 1067 01:29:58,667 --> 01:30:01,000 Go ahead, close your eyes. 1068 01:30:09,583 --> 01:30:12,042 Do you hear those high heels rushing off somewhere? 1069 01:30:16,458 --> 01:30:19,542 What happened to you that made you want to take it out on people like this? 1070 01:30:19,625 --> 01:30:21,042 You're completely insane! 1071 01:30:21,125 --> 01:30:23,750 I never want to see you again! 1072 01:30:23,833 --> 01:30:29,375 Yasmine, ending up with a whore isn't a happy end. It's social work. 1073 01:30:29,458 --> 01:30:30,750 Get out, snotty face! 1074 01:30:30,833 --> 01:30:33,667 Even with your mouth full, you still won't stop yapping about marriage! 1075 01:30:55,125 --> 01:30:59,125 Now, do you feel the wind in your hair? 1076 01:31:09,042 --> 01:31:12,042 Do you feel the sun on your cheek? 1077 01:31:40,042 --> 01:31:45,333 You're only twenty years old and you have so many things to look forward to. 1078 01:31:46,125 --> 01:31:50,292 You have all the time in the world to change your life if you don't like it. 1079 01:31:50,375 --> 01:31:52,000 It's that simple. 1080 01:32:01,333 --> 01:32:02,917 Thank you. 1081 01:32:11,917 --> 01:32:13,792 This spot. 1082 01:32:15,208 --> 01:32:19,083 This is where you've been longing for a kiss. 1083 01:32:20,958 --> 01:32:23,708 It's a shame people don't do this more often. 1084 01:32:31,125 --> 01:32:35,917 Râmnicu Vâlcea is not the same as Râmnicu Sãrat, is it? 1085 01:32:36,000 --> 01:32:37,458 No, they're different. 1086 01:32:37,542 --> 01:32:43,125 It's pronounced Vâl-cea, like a small valley, you know. 1087 01:32:43,208 --> 01:32:44,875 People mistake them. 1088 01:32:44,958 --> 01:32:49,500 -Good afternoon... -C'mon in, we've been waiting for you. 1089 01:32:50,083 --> 01:32:53,458 Bogdan, honey, why didn't you tell us you wanted to get married? 1090 01:32:55,125 --> 01:32:56,000 Mom? 1091 01:33:00,250 --> 01:33:03,917 -Ana? -Yes, Ana, come and join us. 1092 01:33:05,458 --> 01:33:10,917 Just look at these two! A match made in heaven! 1093 01:33:11,000 --> 01:33:12,042 Different customs. 1094 01:33:12,125 --> 01:33:14,917 You man up and ask for her hand properly, and we're good to go! 1095 01:33:15,000 --> 01:33:18,125 -This whole thing is already a mess! -Mother, please! 1096 01:33:21,000 --> 01:33:22,083 It's a misunderstanding. 1097 01:33:23,542 --> 01:33:26,125 Leave him alone, dear, he's obviously nervous. It's normal. 1098 01:33:26,750 --> 01:33:31,750 Oh, bless their young hearts! We were a disaster ourselves back in the day. 1099 01:33:33,292 --> 01:33:37,292 I'll get you strong on some of this holy water and everything's gonna be fine! 1100 01:33:37,375 --> 01:33:41,792 You can call me dad! Or else, I won't recognize you as my son! 1101 01:33:41,875 --> 01:33:45,917 Why didn't you tell us anything? Were you raised by wolves? 1102 01:33:46,000 --> 01:33:48,292 Did we really have to find out from a stranger? 1103 01:33:48,375 --> 01:33:51,708 Bogdan, we're a family. We should tell each other everything. 1104 01:33:51,792 --> 01:33:54,833 We've never had any secrets in our family, you know. 1105 01:33:54,917 --> 01:33:57,958 We told each other everything. 1106 01:33:58,042 --> 01:34:02,500 Well, except for the important stuff. That's personal, you know. 1107 01:34:02,583 --> 01:34:04,958 How can you do this to me? 1108 01:34:05,458 --> 01:34:07,167 I was about to ask you the same thing. 1109 01:34:08,333 --> 01:34:13,792 I gave you everything, including my virginity. 1110 01:34:15,917 --> 01:34:17,917 Did I tell you the story about the turkey? 1111 01:34:18,458 --> 01:34:22,750 -Well, Mr. Pintesteanu, this story is... -Budisteanu! 1112 01:34:22,833 --> 01:34:25,333 -What did I say? -Tãtãrãsanu. 1113 01:34:27,083 --> 01:34:28,542 Where's the steak? 1114 01:34:29,625 --> 01:34:31,875 -What steak? -The one that was in the fridge. 1115 01:34:31,958 --> 01:34:35,167 I cooked it, what was I supposed to... 1116 01:34:36,958 --> 01:34:38,750 See here, so... the turkey... 1117 01:34:40,042 --> 01:34:43,917 that Ana cooked... so then... 1118 01:34:44,000 --> 01:34:45,583 I told her... 1119 01:34:46,208 --> 01:34:52,250 Honey, who taught you... to cook so good... 1120 01:34:52,333 --> 01:34:53,583 Thank God he's shutting up. 1121 01:35:09,917 --> 01:35:12,458 Keep talking, I'll catch up... 1122 01:35:13,167 --> 01:35:16,208 -Can you believe these people? -I guess he likes joking around. 1123 01:35:16,292 --> 01:35:20,000 -I think we should go home. -I got a joke for ya... 1124 01:35:20,625 --> 01:35:22,708 A guy walks into a bar... 1125 01:35:44,625 --> 01:35:47,750 Dad... Dad! 1126 01:35:59,833 --> 01:36:00,875 What the fuck?! 1127 01:36:06,292 --> 01:36:07,250 So here's the plan... 1128 01:36:10,875 --> 01:36:14,583 Good evening, gentlemen! Please accept this welcome gift. 1129 01:36:17,208 --> 01:36:18,542 Do you have the stuff? 1130 01:36:21,583 --> 01:36:23,000 The sandman says hi! 1131 01:36:26,875 --> 01:36:28,167 Team Alpha sets the targets. 1132 01:36:30,250 --> 01:36:34,208 Once confirmed, team Beta deactivates all security devices. 1133 01:36:34,917 --> 01:36:36,042 DANGER 1134 01:36:36,167 --> 01:36:40,833 Our Moldavian mercenary pals will infiltrate the premises at this time. 1135 01:36:42,250 --> 01:36:46,167 You come in through the back and help us out a bit, OK? 1136 01:36:50,042 --> 01:36:51,083 The coast is clear. 1137 01:36:56,792 --> 01:37:01,167 And we take care of our target, namely the canine beast. 1138 01:37:03,417 --> 01:37:06,625 The steak! I'm gonna kill you if I get out of here alive. 1139 01:37:06,708 --> 01:37:07,708 It's not my fault. 1140 01:37:07,792 --> 01:37:08,833 For the dog! 1141 01:37:17,375 --> 01:37:19,792 If that doesn't work, there's plan B. 1142 01:37:29,458 --> 01:37:32,458 Wow, dude, I had no idea you were this good. 1143 01:37:35,250 --> 01:37:37,500 Sweet dreams and thank you for the investment! 1144 01:37:46,875 --> 01:37:48,125 Woman asleep, by Iorgulescu. 1145 01:37:48,208 --> 01:37:49,458 Woman asleep. 1146 01:37:50,375 --> 01:37:54,167 These statuettes look like they're from... the 18th century at least. 1147 01:37:54,250 --> 01:37:56,042 In fact, it's 16th-century art. 1148 01:37:56,125 --> 01:37:59,250 -35,000! -What, for this ugly bitch?! 1149 01:38:00,167 --> 01:38:01,958 Take it, bro! You won't find art at such a bargain. 1150 01:38:02,042 --> 01:38:04,542 Well, if it's art, you say... 1151 01:38:04,625 --> 01:38:05,792 LADY AND SOLDIER 1152 01:38:05,875 --> 01:38:07,542 3,000! Tops! 1153 01:38:07,625 --> 01:38:10,833 -10,000 is a more reasonable price... -I call the shots around here. 1154 01:38:10,917 --> 01:38:13,167 -3,000? -All right. 1155 01:38:13,250 --> 01:38:14,083 500. 1156 01:38:14,167 --> 01:38:16,042 -We'll see about that. -600. 1157 01:38:16,625 --> 01:38:18,208 -Wall lamp: 1,000. -We'll take it. 1158 01:38:18,292 --> 01:38:20,667 -Great! -Wall lamp, 1,000. 1159 01:38:20,750 --> 01:38:21,625 300! 1160 01:38:21,708 --> 01:38:26,625 -These two come as a set: 1,200! -Yeah, sure! 1161 01:38:26,708 --> 01:38:28,000 There's some from Picasso too! 1162 01:38:28,083 --> 01:38:30,917 They have paintings with a pig's ass, huh? 1163 01:38:33,833 --> 01:38:35,292 Yes, with a pig's ass... 1164 01:38:35,667 --> 01:38:36,958 A pig's ass... 1165 01:38:37,042 --> 01:38:43,458 Yeah, now that's what I'm talking about. I like these big ones... 1166 01:38:44,792 --> 01:38:46,875 Big paintings have big prices, you know... 1167 01:38:46,958 --> 01:38:47,917 We'll see about that! 1168 01:38:48,000 --> 01:38:52,125 Let's not be too hasty, fellas! Do you know who this house belongs to? 1169 01:38:54,042 --> 01:38:56,958 This one's a talking statue! 1170 01:39:11,000 --> 01:39:11,958 How much is this one? 1171 01:39:12,042 --> 01:39:14,708 -10,000! -No! No people for sale! 1172 01:39:14,792 --> 01:39:19,667 -Free of charge, right? -Turnip, take Nikita here to the truck. 1173 01:39:23,000 --> 01:39:26,667 For personal use, you know. We'll see. 1174 01:39:27,292 --> 01:39:30,083 Pleasure doing business with you, motherfuckers. 1175 01:39:39,917 --> 01:39:41,958 We'll split it in half, of course. 1176 01:39:49,792 --> 01:39:52,208 Minus expenses, bro. 1177 01:39:52,292 --> 01:39:53,333 Of course. 1178 01:39:55,417 --> 01:39:57,417 We Transnistrians have a saying. 1179 01:39:57,500 --> 01:39:59,208 Beware of Romanians. 1180 01:39:59,292 --> 01:40:01,083 But you guys are pretty upright businesspeople. 1181 01:40:06,708 --> 01:40:08,333 Let's go, Turnip! 1182 01:40:16,833 --> 01:40:19,708 A bonus for the best three buddies ever. 1183 01:40:19,792 --> 01:40:21,500 Where did you steal these from? 1184 01:40:21,583 --> 01:40:23,042 Steal?! Who, me? 1185 01:40:23,125 --> 01:40:25,583 I found them in a drawer. They were begging me to take them. 1186 01:40:25,667 --> 01:40:28,042 -And you had to take them? -Damn right! 1187 01:40:28,125 --> 01:40:32,042 We're upright Romanians alright, but we ain't their bitches. 1188 01:40:32,125 --> 01:40:33,458 No fucking way! 1189 01:40:46,000 --> 01:40:47,792 "WHO LOST WHAT?" "LET'S GO TO IBIZA, NOW!" 1190 01:40:47,875 --> 01:40:51,000 "IT'S SO COMPLICATED BEING AN ARTIST!" "DIDN'T ANYONE WANT YOU?" 1191 01:41:12,375 --> 01:41:16,792 Alright, is this all your stuff? 1192 01:41:19,167 --> 01:41:20,917 I've got a little something I need to add. 1193 01:41:33,667 --> 01:41:34,542 For real? 1194 01:41:38,000 --> 01:41:41,542 Skilled... Enduring... 1195 01:41:42,333 --> 01:41:44,625 Faithful... 1196 01:41:50,333 --> 01:41:51,875 Are you OK? 1197 01:41:56,083 --> 01:41:59,458 Every man I've been with has humiliated me. 1198 01:42:03,750 --> 01:42:05,250 None of them ever loved me. 1199 01:42:05,958 --> 01:42:07,708 Have you loved any of them? 1200 01:42:11,250 --> 01:42:12,458 No. 1201 01:42:13,958 --> 01:42:16,250 Then why do you care? 1202 01:42:20,958 --> 01:42:22,667 We'll always be there for you 1203 01:42:22,750 --> 01:42:28,417 and if any jerk ever tries to hurt you, 1204 01:42:29,125 --> 01:42:30,500 we'll show him! 1205 01:42:41,958 --> 01:42:46,792 I lost the easiest bet ever! 1206 01:43:10,958 --> 01:43:12,708 I love you guys! 1207 01:43:13,667 --> 01:43:15,542 I love you too! 1208 01:43:21,333 --> 01:43:23,250 Me too! 1209 01:43:39,625 --> 01:43:42,333 To live honestly... you have to know how to steal, man. 1210 01:43:42,917 --> 01:43:44,208 Yeah, that's us. 1211 01:43:48,167 --> 01:43:51,792 We got it all. I got the money and I got the girl. 1212 01:43:53,958 --> 01:43:56,667 Ana's riding this guy's rocket tonight! 1213 01:43:56,750 --> 01:43:58,750 You're going with Roxi on a cruise trip. 1214 01:43:59,958 --> 01:44:03,125 But I don't have Roxi anymore. 1215 01:44:03,958 --> 01:44:07,167 Don't worry, man, there are plenty of Roxis out there. 1216 01:44:08,792 --> 01:44:11,042 Stop here, at the flower shop, please! 1217 01:44:11,125 --> 01:44:12,750 We'll stop near our place. 1218 01:44:12,833 --> 01:44:18,125 I want this one and I want this Roxi! What's your problem? 1219 01:44:18,208 --> 01:44:20,458 This is where I bought the first bouquet I ever gave her, OK? 1220 01:44:20,542 --> 01:44:21,917 Magi... 1221 01:44:23,458 --> 01:44:24,917 we've stopped. 1222 01:44:27,583 --> 01:44:28,750 I should get out then. 1223 01:44:35,917 --> 01:44:37,458 What are we gonna do with this stuff? 1224 01:44:37,542 --> 01:44:40,625 We could stack them together 1225 01:44:41,417 --> 01:44:43,083 and auction them... 1226 01:44:45,167 --> 01:44:49,667 This one's a real business woman, isn't she?! 1227 01:44:52,875 --> 01:44:56,917 -Roxi! -Oh, come on, knock it off! 1228 01:44:58,542 --> 01:45:01,083 Bet you don't have the guts to try it on. 1229 01:45:01,167 --> 01:45:03,667 These go with that one over there. 1230 01:45:03,750 --> 01:45:05,125 Put them together. 1231 01:45:05,750 --> 01:45:10,708 With the money we make, we're gonna go to... Ibiza! 1232 01:45:14,292 --> 01:45:16,583 That'd be awesome! 1233 01:45:16,667 --> 01:45:19,125 If we're ever gonna make that much money. 1234 01:45:19,208 --> 01:45:20,042 What's this? 1235 01:45:22,125 --> 01:45:27,208 Ana, it's her journal! The Complete Idiot's Guide to Love! 1236 01:45:27,292 --> 01:45:28,167 No way! 1237 01:45:28,792 --> 01:45:30,875 I wrote about almost everyone in there! 1238 01:45:31,583 --> 01:45:33,333 Even the history teacher?! 1239 01:45:34,375 --> 01:45:36,000 No, you didn't! 1240 01:45:38,375 --> 01:45:39,375 YASMINE'S JOURNAL 1241 01:45:40,083 --> 01:45:42,958 We sold the journal for 5,000! 1242 01:45:43,792 --> 01:45:46,708 -No way! -I can't believe this! 1243 01:45:46,792 --> 01:45:47,833 We leave right now! 1244 01:45:47,917 --> 01:45:52,250 Ana, you're in charge of buying plane tickets on that relic phone of yours. 1245 01:46:01,750 --> 01:46:03,583 Ana, what are we gonna do with you?! 1246 01:46:03,667 --> 01:46:07,792 ELENA WET: IS THIS STILL FOR SALE? 1247 01:46:22,750 --> 01:46:27,458 What's this? Does this look like a damn concert hall to you? 1248 01:46:27,542 --> 01:46:31,625 What's with all this racket in my own patio? Have you boys lost it? 1249 01:46:31,708 --> 01:46:34,583 -Good morning! -I'll be right there, son! 1250 01:46:39,708 --> 01:46:44,167 Come on, come in! Make yourselves at home! 1251 01:46:46,167 --> 01:46:48,458 I'm getting married! 1252 01:46:48,542 --> 01:46:53,542 Hey you! Get your ass over here. What's the deal with all this racket? 1253 01:46:56,750 --> 01:46:59,083 I'm here to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage... again. 1254 01:46:59,167 --> 01:47:00,667 Will you give her to him or should I? 1255 01:47:00,750 --> 01:47:03,708 I will because this lad's gonna be coming here every day. 1256 01:47:05,083 --> 01:47:05,917 Get over here! 1257 01:47:06,000 --> 01:47:07,833 -This is it. -Good, great! 1258 01:47:07,917 --> 01:47:14,083 Hey, you, Vienna Philharmonic! Note down your repertoire. Everything's set? 1259 01:47:14,167 --> 01:47:15,125 Father? Where are you? 1260 01:47:15,208 --> 01:47:17,750 Father, do a nice ceremony, but we'll talk money later, alright? 1261 01:47:17,833 --> 01:47:20,125 -Ceci, get the girls! -In a minute! 1262 01:47:22,292 --> 01:47:23,833 Congratulations! 1263 01:47:27,333 --> 01:47:30,250 It's fine! Congratulations to everyone. We have food, drinks... 1264 01:47:30,333 --> 01:47:33,375 The girls aren't here. They didn't spend the night at home. 1265 01:47:33,458 --> 01:47:36,833 As usual! Don't worry, guys. I'll take care of this. 1266 01:47:36,917 --> 01:47:38,583 They don't always spend the night at home, but I'll get them for you. 1267 01:47:45,208 --> 01:47:47,333 Come on, say something for our Facebook fans! 1268 01:47:57,292 --> 01:48:00,292 I don't have a Facebook account anymore, but I'll post on Yasmine's. 1269 01:48:04,250 --> 01:48:07,750 -Oh, fuck, Magi's calling me. -No, no guys! 1270 01:48:13,708 --> 01:48:15,917 We're gonna buy ourselves some Schengen bikinis! 1271 01:48:32,833 --> 01:48:34,042 She's going to Ibiza... 1272 01:48:38,750 --> 01:48:40,000 It's over. 1273 01:48:42,250 --> 01:48:43,708 We go after her! 1274 01:48:43,792 --> 01:48:45,792 How?! 1275 01:48:48,708 --> 01:48:50,625 With that bus over there! 1276 01:48:52,250 --> 01:48:54,125 Why didn't I think of that? 1277 01:48:54,208 --> 01:48:55,750 PREMIUM BLONDE BEER 1278 01:48:59,833 --> 01:49:01,917 Please, come on, can't you drive any faster? 1279 01:49:02,000 --> 01:49:04,792 Faster, come on! 1280 01:49:04,875 --> 01:49:07,375 -Faster, come on! -We'll get there, calm down! 1281 01:49:11,125 --> 01:49:13,333 Man, I can't wait to taste one of those brownies. 1282 01:49:13,417 --> 01:49:16,000 Ceci, pass me one of those, will ya? 1283 01:49:16,083 --> 01:49:17,500 Later, not now! 1284 01:49:17,583 --> 01:49:19,167 Ceci, if you don't give me one now, 1285 01:49:19,250 --> 01:49:21,000 I'm leaving the wheel and getting one myself! 1286 01:49:21,083 --> 01:49:23,292 I don't have them right now! 1287 01:49:35,792 --> 01:49:37,042 Close call, huh? 1288 01:49:43,167 --> 01:49:44,167 Hold on tight! 1289 01:49:54,042 --> 01:49:55,417 Dad? 1290 01:50:03,083 --> 01:50:05,250 I love you! 1291 01:50:08,083 --> 01:50:10,000 I love you too! 1292 01:50:13,125 --> 01:50:14,125 SPECIAL FORCES 1293 01:50:14,208 --> 01:50:17,500 Get down! Everybody on the ground! 1294 01:50:17,583 --> 01:50:19,708 Get down now! 1295 01:50:20,458 --> 01:50:21,583 Get down! 1296 01:50:23,333 --> 01:50:27,042 Everybody get your IDs ready to be checked 1297 01:50:27,125 --> 01:50:30,000 and take everything out of your pockets! 1298 01:50:32,000 --> 01:50:34,917 What about that other girl? The one with the perfume. 1299 01:50:35,000 --> 01:50:37,333 There is no other girl. That was Mihai and his girlfriend. 1300 01:50:40,000 --> 01:50:42,417 I was selling perfumes to save up for a trip around the world, 1301 01:50:42,500 --> 01:50:44,500 like you always wanted. 1302 01:50:49,417 --> 01:50:51,917 I can spend the rest of my life with you. 1303 01:51:00,833 --> 01:51:03,000 Maybe this will shut you two up! 1304 01:51:03,083 --> 01:51:07,125 Everybody against the wall! 1305 01:51:29,083 --> 01:51:30,292 Ana... 1306 01:51:32,792 --> 01:51:35,250 I've been thinking about it and maybe you're right. 1307 01:51:38,167 --> 01:51:41,125 If you want us to get married, then let's get married. 1308 01:51:50,042 --> 01:51:52,583 You humiliated me in front of everyone. 1309 01:51:53,208 --> 01:51:54,458 No. 1310 01:51:56,250 --> 01:52:01,125 I need to focus on me, not on being your girlfriend. 1311 01:52:15,917 --> 01:52:17,875 I don't understand what's happening. 1312 01:52:17,958 --> 01:52:19,167 Me neither, dude. 1313 01:52:22,458 --> 01:52:26,042 Your name is Yasmine, you live in Primãverii, 1314 01:52:26,125 --> 01:52:30,208 your parents are filthy rich and you have a thing for history teachers. 1315 01:52:30,292 --> 01:52:33,000 SPECIAL FORCES 1316 01:52:40,708 --> 01:52:42,333 Let's play a game. 1317 01:52:42,917 --> 01:52:46,375 If I win, we get married. 1318 01:52:50,042 --> 01:52:52,083 No more games. 1319 01:52:53,583 --> 01:52:56,125 Let's just love each other. 1320 01:52:56,208 --> 01:52:58,417 It's that simple. 1321 01:53:19,542 --> 01:53:22,833 Seeing that you're the hot shot around here, 1322 01:53:22,917 --> 01:53:25,000 I have something to ask you. 1323 01:53:28,708 --> 01:53:32,542 Roxana, do you take George to be your husband? 1324 01:53:48,208 --> 01:53:49,208 Yes, I do. 1325 01:54:02,000 --> 01:54:03,125 Yes, I do. 1326 01:58:45,667 --> 01:58:48,917 Subtitle translation by Olivia Primejdie 98476