All language subtitles for Strike.1998.1080p.WEBRip.x265-RARBG

** [ Girls' Choir Singing ]

** [ Segue To Pop-Rock ]

[ Girl ]
January 4, 1963.

Dear Dennis: I've been
abducted by my own parents.

They found out
what we were planning,
and now they want me...

as far away
from you as possible.

I'm not coming back to Chancery.
They're hauling me
and my horse...

[ No Audio ]
to some all-girls' school
in Connecticut.

They think I'll be safe
surrounded by high walls
and lesbians.

This is the end of the world.
One look tells you,

this place
eats the hairy bird.

You know, you are going to love
it here. My great-grandmother
was class of 1903.

So, I'm fourth generation
to go here.

Both my mom and dad are
on the Board of Trustees.

So, obviously, we believe that
Miss Godard's is the finest
girls' school in the East.

This is Miss Godard,
who founded the school.

- She looks like
an ax murderer.
- Indeed, you will find...

the original ax on display
at the woodpile.

[ Laughs ]
Hello, Miss McVane.
Hello, Abby.

Kindly explain my joke
to the new girl.

Well, one of the rules is
if you're late to class,
you have to chop wood.

You must be
Odette Sinclair.
Welcome.

I know it's a difficult
adjustment from a coed
academy to a girls' school.

If I can help
ease the transition,
come see me in my office.

Carry on, Abby.

Who was that ?
Zorro ?

Oh, that's Miss McVane,
the headmistress.
She really great.

** [ Trumpet ]

[ Girls Screaming ]

[ Girls Shouting ]
Verena, Tinka !
You've got a new roommate !

- [ Together ]
What ?
- She's from Detroit !

- [ Together ] What ?
- We take the honor system
very seriously here.

Miss Godard believed
that the girls should
govern themselves...

in order to learn
to take responsibility
for their actions.

- What's this ?
- This ? Oh--
[ Laughs ]

I'm a monitor.
I'm on the self-government
committee.

Elected nine times now.
So, I have nine stars.

Taking a break.
You're absolutely
not allowed to smoke.

Uh, where
are you going ?
To visit my horse.

I was going to warn you
about your roommates.

But now,
I don't think I will.

She's got five pairs
of Pappagallo's.

She's got a great stereo !

Men on the floor !

Come along now, girls.
Scurry, scurry.

Will you get into your room ?
There's men on the floor.

[ Girls ]
Hey, baby !

* Walkin' the dog
[ Girls Giggling ]
You can't twist to this music.

It's too slow.
* Just a-walkin' the dog

[ Sighs ]
Now, there's no place
to dance, anyway.

* If you don't know
how to do it, I'll show you
how to walk the dog *

Ooh, this must
be the boyfriend.

"Love, Dennis."
Ohh !
[ Giggling ]

[ Both Gasp ]

I did not give you permission
to play my records.
[ Needle Scratching ]

Welcome ! I'm Tinka Parker.
And this is Verena Von Stefan.

- Art thou perchance Odette ?
- Odie.

- Those are my shoes.
- We always borrow
each other's things.

I loathe and abhor
this place.

I don't see how you can say that
when you're from Detroit.

So, Odie, what are you
doing here at Miss God-Awful ?

How come you had to
transfer from Chancery ?

Oh, no doubt things were
getting too hot and heavy
with Dennis the Penis.

Up your ziggie
with a wah-wah brush.

[ Together ]
What ?
[ Both Giggling ]

- Say that again.
- Up your ziggie
with a wah-wah brush.

That's priceless.
Where did you hear that ?

- I made it up.
- [ Bell Rings ]
- [ Together ] Dinner !

Go back up
and sew up that hem.

Hold it.

Why, Abby and Susie.
Sieg Heil !

Parker !
Take those off.

Why ? They're not jewelry.
They're office supplies.

Off. Or I'll report
you to Miss McVane.
[ Scoffs ]

Abby, up your ziggie
with a wah-wah brush.

So, what's she like ?
Mm, she could
be improved.

We've decided not
to get rid of her.

She's got a great
record collection.
Geez. Yum !

Odious, this is Tweety Goldberg
and Momo Haines.
Hi.

** [ Singing In Latin ]

* Ignoramus

* Purple Penis

** [ Stops ]

- Are you carrying
Dennis' child ?
- [ Laughs ]

You can tell Tinka.
She's had four
pregnancy scares.

- Four.
- Was it beautiful ?

Do you actually expect me
to answer these questions ?

But we're curious.
We all have our hymens,
except Tinka.

That's enough.
Clearly, she doesn't
want to describe it.

It's like hog wrestling.
Isn't that right, Odious ?

Oh, I don't even think she's
done it with Dennis yet.

Are you gonna eat that ?
[ Other Girls ]
Tweety !

Where's my ipecac ?

You hid it !

No !
Oh, God !
I knew it !

Tweety, no, no.
Give it-- No !
Let go of me, Momo !

Tweety, don't do it !
Give me the bottle. Ow !

Fine. Make yourself sick.
You're only gonna be hungry
again later.

[ Vomiting ]

[ Toilet Flushes ]

She swallows ipecac syrup,
and then 15 minutes later
she heaves up everything.

Ipecac causes convulsions
in the alimentary canal.

Are you taking chemistry ?
Yes.

Great ! Mrs. Dewey is
the most adorable teacher
in the school.

She's gonna help me
to get into M.I.T.

Who's your advisor ?
Mr. Dewey.

Eew, Mr. Dewey !
Eew, he's a lech.

[ Bell Ringing ]

- Good night, Tinka.
- Good night, Verena.

Good night, Dennis.

Ohh ! Dennis !

Harder ! Deeper !
[ Snickering ]

[ Moaning ]
[ Giggling ]

[ Thunder Rumbling ]
[ Giggling ]

[ Odette ]
Dear Dennis:
I miss you so much.

I'm perishing
in this penal colony.
I'm completely alone.

My roommates are demented.

Dear Mother and Father:
Today, I was elected...

to the Security Council
of the model U.N.

I'm so popular
I got to play Russia.

Dear Mom and Dad:
Today was dress rehearsal
for Death of a Salesman.

My roommate plays Willy Loman.
Ben ! A man has got
to add up to something !

Dear Dennis:
Maybe I can escape from here
and we can meet in New York.

[ Sniffling ]
[ Droplets Plopping ]

[ Sniffling ]

[ Knocking ]
[ Door Closing ]

[ Sniffles ]

Oh, good morning, Odette.
What can I do for you ?

I'd like to know why
you turned down my request
for a pass this weekend.

You wanted to go into New York
to see a horse show...
[ Sniffles ]

alone and unchaperoned and
your parents worry you may
run off to meet some boy.

I'm required to keep
you here on weekends,

unless you're invited
by a friend whom they approve.

[ Knuckles Cracking ]

Dear, I can think of
no better cure for your...
[ Sniffles ]

conspicuous misery
than to make some friends.

Don't reject them.
They're not just girls.

They're you.

And if you get to know them,
then you'll be
discovering yourself.

And that is, believe it or not,
as great an adventure
as the opposite sex.

Thank you.
[ Sniffles ]

[ Door Opens
And Closes ]

For the most part, your papers
ranged from the merely adequate
to the completely vapid.

With the exception of one.

Miss Sinclair,
I congratulate you on your grasp
of Pan-European politics.

Now, remember, ladies,
tomorrow's assignment will--

- Verena, may I know
the reason you're so late ?
- Cramps.

I wonder what would happen
to American foreign policy
if President Kennedy got cramps.

Possibly, history has
already been influenced
by his bad back, sir.

Please submit a paper tomorrow
supporting your thesis,
Von Stefan.

Miss Parker, do you have
any views on this subject ?

No.
Hmm.

Plenty of room
but no views, hmm ?

Oh. Just as I thought. Empty.
Tomorrow's assignment--
What ?

[ Bell Ringing ]
review chapters
seven through 11 in the Palmer.

Come see me
in my office after lunch.

If I'm not mistaken,

you show a genuine interest
in political theory.

Yeah.
Kind of, I guess.

I'm going to be attending
a series of lectures over
the next few weekends...

in New York City,
which you might enjoy.

I'm sure I can arrange
for Miss McVane's permission.

And perhaps even
extra credit as well.

New York.

Between you and me,
Miss Godard's isn't exactly...

a healthy environment
for an energetic...

and...
curious young spirit.

We wouldn't want
the hall monitors to catch you
with lint on your jacket.

Girls have
been shot for less.

I'm so fat,
I could die.

Look who's here.

Why, Odious.
Hi, guys.

Oh, my God.
She's actually
talking to us today.

[ Laughing ]
What happened
with Dewey ?

- Did he feel you up ?
- He invited me to a lecture
in New York.

You didn't say you'd
go with him, did you ?
He wants your bod.

Ladies, it's time to put on
our thinking caps.

Somehow, we've got
to get rid of him.

But then we'd lose
Mrs. Dewey, whom we adore.

Yeah. But if she knew he was
a pervert, she'd divorce him.

Right. She's got
to see some proof.

Like when my mom found those
pictures in my dad's desk.

Well, uh, I thought that maybe
if I went to New York I could
sneak away and see Dennis.

You don't need Dewey
to go to New York.

All you have
to do is ask us.

[ Snoring ]

[ Laughing ]

It's easy to get a weekend pass.
All you need is a letter
from your mother.

Dear Miss McVane: Tinka will
be joining me in New York City
the weekend of the 20th.

Blah, blah, blah.
So, what I need is a pass
that lets me get out alone.

That's what it is. Tinka takes
the train into New York and
stays at my mom's apartment.

She's in Europe
for the year and Tinka's mom
is in Boca Raton.

Wait a minute.
So this is--
I do all the mothers' letters.

Tweety wins
our prize every year.

Miss Godard's girls
are very talented.
Let me see that.

Guys, wait !

How do you mail it
so it has the right postmark ?

You mail it to one of your
friends back home, and they
mail it for you.

Miss Godard's girls
are very organized.

[ Chattering ]

[ Engine Revving ]

[ Engine Revving ]

[ Engine Revving ]

Guys, I think
I'm in love.

[ Girl ] Do you have
something I could--
Schoolmaids !

Hi, I'm Snake.
This is Skunk, Groundhog,
Possum and Beagle.

- We're the--
[ Snaps Fingers ]
- [ In Unison ] Flat Critters.

- What is this ?
- We're a photography club.

We take pictures of animals
who have been run over.

Show 'em, Skunk.

Eew.
Eew.
Eew.

- Eew !
- I love this woman !

She's everything anyone could
need. Poise and personality.

Straight teeth,
rich parents.
Go away and leave us alone.

Her name is Tinka Parker.
[ Purrs ]

Tinka.
Her name is Tinka.

Now you are my dream.
And you can take away
my money, my food.

You can take away my home.
You can take away my car !

But if you take away my dream
I'm nothing but a--
[ Snaps Fingers ]

[ In Unison ]
Flat Critter !

[ Woman Shrieks ]
What are you doing ?
Bring that back !

[ Man Shouting ]
Come back with that hat,
you little punk !

So, explain to me one thing.

[ Girls Chattering ]
Why can't I have you ?

Because you are
lower than dirt.

You're subterranean. You're
a townie, for Christ sakes.

I don't know you !
We haven't been introduced.

Is that how people fall
in love in your world ?
They're "introduced" ?

Come on !
How sad.

How tragic !
People like that are--
[ Snaps Fingers ]

[ In Unison ]
Flat Critters !
Eek !

Wo-wo-wo-wo-wo !
[ Girls Screaming ]

[ Man ]
Now, hold on,
you young studs !

Hey, Tinka !
Tinka !

[ Bell Tolling ]
So, do you really
dig that guy ?

I have
some dignity,
you know.

Odie, you're supposed
to wear the blazer on all
trips into the ville.

Didn't
you know that ?
Yes, I did.

But, actually,
I have a complaint
about the school jacket.

I find it a little too
restraining. Cuts off
flow of blood to my breasts.

- [ Laughing ]
- Five demerits.

You will stay in study hall
till bedtime every night
for a week.

By God !
What ?

What is that on your nose ?
You know, at first, I thought
it was just freckles.

But now that I'm up close,
I see. It is dried poo-poo.

[ Laughing ]
Now, does Miss McVane simply
pull down her underwear...

and bend over ?
[ Laughing ]
Six demerits.

- Eight demerits.
- Nine !
- Ten ! [ Barks ]

Arf ! Arf !
[ Laughing ]

That was breathtaking.
Thank you.

You really have
a fantastic way with words.

You should be a speechwriter
or a demagogue or something.

You think ? I mean,
I've always been kind
of interested in politics.

Excellent.

Odious, we'd like
to invite you
to join the D.A.R.

Oh, I'm not
a Republican.
Oh, I should hope not.

We'd like
to show you something.

Always make sure nobody's
looking, because nobody knows
about this door.

There's a door back here ?
Yeah. Last year,
I went behind this tree...

to hide
from the monitors
and I saw it.

This is the attic.

We're right under the roof here.
It runs all the way along
the school, you know.

From the dorms,
to administration,
under the theater.

Just about anywhere.
And the kitchen,
don't forget !

Wow-- That's all
she cares about.

Anyhow, we got
the place to ourselves.
Mostly.

The only people who come up
here are the maintenance men
once in a while.

They store old furniture and
stuff... and then we steal it.

So far, nobody's
discovered our secret room.

This is where
the D.A.R. meets.

Mmm ! We can get any
canned food we want to up here.

They store boxes
of it over the kitchen.

What exactly
is the D.A.R. ?

It stands for Daughters
of the American Ravioli.

Cold ravioli.
I think
it's better cold.

In the D.A.R., we share
our most secret dreams
of what we want to be.

Most of the girls
here at Miss Godard's,

they've got
all the opportunities
to become something--

a good upbringing, a good
education, they're loaded.

But, in ten years,
they'll be married
with three kids and two cars,

a colonial, a collie--
they're finished.

That's why it's called
a finishing school.

But we, the D.A.R., have
other plans for ourselves.

I'm going to become
a pioneer biologist and
find a cure for something.

I'm going to start
my own magazine.

Like Vogue.
I'm going to call it Moi.

-I'm going to be a psychiatrist.
-I'm going to be on the cover
of M magazine...

as a famous
actress-folksinger-slut.

And Momo will be my doctor
and Tweety will be my shrink.

We all pledge
to help each other
achieve our ambitions,

no matter how big or small,
for our whole life to come.

So now,
Odette Sinclair,

what is your
most cherished dream ?

I would like
to be an ex-virgin.

Your great ambition in life
is to lay with your legs
in the air like a bug ?

[ Laughing ]
I went home for Christmas
and I got a diaphragm.

Before I could use it,
my mother found it
and sent me here.

So now, all I want to do
is what I was about to
before I got caught.

All right. If you join
the D.A.R., we'll organize...

a secret "randy-vous" for you
and Dennis to meet at my mom's
apartment in New York.

- But how do I join ?
- First, you must undergo
a little test...

to prove your sincerity.

Which brings us to another
item on our agenda.

Yes.
Mr. Dewey has got to go.

And you can help. You're
the only one who has French...

in the same room
right after Mr. Dewey's class.

[ Bell Ringing ]

Okay.

Sinclair, your mother called,
but nobody could find you.
Where have you been ?

None of your
floppin' buggies.

[ Bell Chimes ]
Time's up, ladies. Please pass
your papers to the right.

- Package from home ?
- Yeah. My mom sent me a quilt.

Verena, why are you so late ?

You've missed
an entire period.

- You mean, I'm pregnant ?
- [ Classmates Laughing ]

[ Laughing Continues ]
[ Bell Rings ]

- Where's my briefcase ?
- Um, maybe you left it
in the faculty lounge.

That's impossible.

By the way, sir, I'm sorry
but I can't go to New York
with you this weekend.

Hmm ?
Well, perhaps another time.

Good morning,
Mademoiselle Odette.

Comment allez-vous ?
Tres bien, merci.

Whose is this ?

Oh, let's see.

[ Gasps, Speaks
In French ]

Can you really
order this stuff ?
Miss McVane !

Oh, look !
This one has three speeds.

Call Frank Dewey in here.

So, where's you find
all that stuff, Verena ?

I stole it
from my dad's collection.

I found his secret
hiding place last year.

He likes anything
with whips and stuff.
Eew !

Guys, cool it.
The warden.

Sinclair and Von Stefan,

you will come with me
to Miss McVane's office,
right now.

Verena, I wonder
if you realize
how hard it is...

to attract male teachers
to Miss Godard's.

They consider girls' schools
the bottom of the barrel.

We certainly don't
pay them enough
to alter their opinion.

So, we are
fortunate indeed...

to have Mr. Dewey
on the faculty.

Yes. He's a very good lecher.
I mean, teacher.

There's some sort of conspiracy
afoot to discredit Mr. Dewey.

He is upset. I have no proof,
but my instinct tells me...

that you are behind
this little gambit.

- What gambit ?
- Think of it as a tribute
to your talents...

that I suspect you.

Oh, you're very smart,
Von Stefan, but mainly
in the derriere.

Now, at Miss Godard's
we try to educate the mind
and not the buttocks.

So, unless your smarts
begin migrating from
your heinie to your head,

the next time you find yourself
in this office will be
the occasion of your dismissal.

This is so unfair.
I don't even know what--

I have asked Abby to keep
an eye on you and to report...

anything she construes
as misconduct.

- Yes, Miss McVane.
- Abby, you may return
to study hall.

Verena, when young people
of one sex are cooped up
for too long in a place,

there is an unhealthy
disposition to plotting
and cruel mischief.

I really think you'd benefit
from a weekend away from here,

yet I see that you've chosen
to remain on campus since
the beginning of the year.

I know your mother
is still in Paris,
but you have friends...

who would invite you
to their houses.

I love it here.
It's my home.

No, dear, it's not.

I'm sorry about
your parents' separation.
Must have been a rough summer.

Do you want
to talk about it ?
No.

I mean-- [ Sighs ]
it's an unfair world.

[ Plop ]

You may be right.

[ Sighs ]
On your way out, please tell
Odette to come in here.

Odette, sit down.
[ Sighs ]

Odette, I received a letter
from your mother requesting
a weekend pass.

- Yes. This weekend.
- However, your mother happened
to call this morning...

about a tuition payment and,
when I mentioned the letter,

she knew
nothing about it.

[ Plopping Continues ]

Not a half-bad forgery.

I am referring this
to the committee.

Odette Sinclair,
the committee has decided...

not to recommend expulsion
and give you a second chance.

However, you are grounded
for the remainder
of the school year.

- I would like to rebut.
- You're not allowed
a rebuttal.

It's a filibuster.
I have the floor.

- [ Abby ]
We don't allow that, either.
- What is this, a junta ?

** [ R & B Ballad ]

* I, I who have nothing

- I'm grounded.
- I never leave.

You promised to help and
instead you made things worse.

[ Scoffs ] Hey. We didn't
get rid of Dewey either.

You can't collapse because
of some minor disappointment.

You get tougher.
In the D.A.R.,
we have a saying:

"no more
little white gloves."

* I love you *
Come on.
Let's go out for a smoke.

We'll just have to organize
some way for Dennis to meet
you here instead of New York.

Somewhere private where
you can do the dirty deed.

Is that possible ?
I'll think
of something.

I promise.
But it's a waste
of my mental skills.

I'd rather be planning
your political career.

[ Scoffs ]
You shouldn't
be thinking about sex.

It's so trite.
Come on. I'm supposed to be
thinking about it at my age.

Don't you ever ?
Why do you think my brain
is so swift and uncluttered ?

Come on. There must
be someone you like.
[ Giggles ]

[ Sighs ]
Alas, I lust
for no one.

Not even you.
[ Both Giggling ]

- [ Bell Ringing ]
- Tinka ! Tinka !

[ Motor Whirring ]
** [ Bongos ]

Tinka, the wind
calls your name.

And the pond,
and the trees,

and the--
pachysandra--

** [ Bongos Continue ]
And the stars,
and the moon--

You ! Pests ! Go home !
And the vines--
They all call your name.

Who's that ?
Tinka !
It ain't Gidget.

- I'll call the guards !
- You do that !

Snake ?
Get out of here !

Tinka, come away with me, girl.
Tonight's the night
we're gonna get introduced.

No !
We gotta go !
[ Whirring ]

Tinka ! Tinka !
[ Guards Shouting ]
I know what you look like !

Momo, are there
any Triscuits left ?

- No, Tweety.
- Oh, I'm so hungry.
My stomach is raging.

- 'Cause you ralphed supper.
- [ Sighs ]

I'm gonna
get some ravioli.

Tweety--
Don't get caught !

[ Gasps ]

[ Groans ]

[ Man ]
What was that ?
[ Man #2 ] Someone--

[ Keys Jangling ]

[ Lock Clicks ]
Oh, my God.

Who's there ?

[ Miss McVane ]
I don't believe it.
[ Man ] What happened ?

[ Sighs ]
The ceiling has caved in
from the leak.

[ Man ]
This-- This proves our point.
It does not !

I think we're all making
a terrible mistake...

not to consult
the alumni and parents.

[ Man ] We make a special
appeal every year, and we only
get enough for Band-Aids.

Eve Godard founded this school
because she believed...

that girls had a better
chance to grow strong...

away from the irresistible
domination of men.

She used to say,
"We build them up
so you can't tear them down."

They come first here.

If we merge
with the boys' academy,
the girls will come second.

They shouldn't have to learn
such a bitter lesson
at this crucial age.

St. Ambrose is one
of the oldest and finest...

boys' prep schools
in the East.

I have bailed
this school out
year after year.

But if the board rejects
this brilliant proposal,

I will cancel
my support.
[ Man ]
Page.

Now, may we put
this son of a bitch
to a vote ?

All those in favor
of coeducation.

Hurry up !

Guys, listen to what
Tweety just found out.

[ Tweety Whispering ]
Miss Godard's is going coed
with St. Ambrose.

- St. Ambrose Academy ?
- Shh ! We're not supposed
to know !

Next year !
Why ?
It's a disaster !

St. Ambrose boys
are so cute !

Why can't we just--
This is the best thing
to happen since Midol.

Boys at Miss Godard's.
Oh, yeah. You would just go out
and greet them with open legs.

Hey, guys. Now they're gonna
have to call it Miss Gonads.
[ All Laughing ]

Goldberg, Haines.
Back to your room.

Not another blessed peep
out of the rest of you !

[ Door Closes ]
The D.A.R. meets tomorrow night
after classes.

[ Girls Arguing ]
It's not
going to be okay !

I'm not going
to get into M.I.T. now !

If I apply with a lot of boys
from the same school, you know
they'll accept the boys first !

That's not true.
Yes, it is !

[ Odie ]
All I ever hear
is girls complaining...

how lonely and bored
they are, right ?
Oh, yes.

[ Momo ]
Tinka, maybe. Not me ! I can
stand a little loneliness !

This is a school !
We're all trying
to get smarter !

If St. Ambrose merges with us,
instead we'll all be killing
ourselves to be cute.

Right ! Just imagine.
We'll have to wash our hair
every night.

We'll have to sleep on rollers
till our scalp bleeds.

Then we'll have to get up
at 6:00 every morning
for the comb-out.

Your lungs will
be lined with hair spray.

Then, you need all this
equipment to push up the tits...

and blitz the zits
and spray the pits.

[ Momo ] She's right.
Then-Then you stagger
into class...

[ Groans ]
and you look perfect
but you're exhausted.

You're too tired to even think !
But that's okay...

because the teachers,
they won't call on you anyway !

Also, you don't want
to be smarter than the boys.
They don't like that.

So to wake up, you drink
some coffee at lunch
but don't eat the food.

-You'll be on a permanent diet !
-I'm not gonna change the way
I am 'cause boys are around.

Oh, come off it, Tweety.
I've seen you at school dances.

It's like The Three Faces
of Eve. You turn into
this simpering, fawning...

Verena. Verena !
wretch, and the whole next week,
we have to put up with your...

suicide attempts because
your date didn't like you !
Verena, stop.

Shut up !
[ Groans ]
Verena !

Now, you've done it.
Don't listen to her, Tweety.

[ Odie ]
That was really
uncalled-for, Vagina.

Look, Von Stefan. I know
you like this place the way
it is, but wake up !

- It's not real life. Real life
is boy-girl, boy-girl.
- No !

- Real life is boy
on top of girl !
- Would you two stop it ?

- You should know that.
- Oh--

Look. It looks like
this is going to happen
whether we like it or not,

so we're just going
to have to adjust.
Yes, we're gonna have to adjust.

Where would we be now if
President Kennedy had said,

"Oh, well, we'll just have
to adjust to living
in the shadow...

- of nuclear warheads on Cuba" ?
- There ya go !

They're just boys, Verena,
not communists.

Ha !
I'm not gonna live in
the shadow of the hairy bird !

Well, that's your prob.
You're afraid of boys !

Order. Order !
Oh, you'd be afraid
of boys too, except...

Order !
you've got nothing
left to lose, Miss Tinka !

- Prude !
- Tramp !
- Truce ! Quiet !

Come on !
Have some ravioli.
Oh--

[ Sighs ]
Here's what I propose.

The St. Ambrose Choir
is coming down
for a dance and concert in May.

Obviously, this is a trial
to see if we all get along.

So, we must make
the boys look so awful...

the trustees will have
to cancel the merge
of our two schools.

What do you mean, "we" ?
Count me out.

You're in the D.A.R.
You have to help.
Well, then, I quit.

Me too.

What about you, Odie ?

Maybe it wouldn't be that bad,
having boys here.

I mean, it doesn't have
to be about sex, right ?
They can just be our friends.

- Just like we're friends.
- Friends ? Look at us !

Just mention boys,
and everybody's a traitor.

So, are you going to stay
and help them with their
nasty little plan ?

Come on, Verena.
Don't do it.

It's pathetic. You all want
to sell out the school
because you're horny !

[ Sighs ]

Well, the D.A.R.
is dead.
[ Sighs ]

[ Sighs ]
Long live
The Hairy Bird Committee.

Hear, hear !
Okay. Let's get some ideas
for the St. Ambrose dance.

How can we put them
in a bad light ?

What sort of boys
would your parents never
allow you to consort with ?

Okay. Okay, well--

If they were drunks.
Mmm.

Or sex fiends.
Good.

Good night, Verena.

So what do you want
this time ?

[ Sighs ] I need
20 pounds of sugar.
No problem.

And about two dozen
liquor bottles.

No. I don't want
trouble.

I'm talking about
empty bottles.
Ah. Okay.

Fifty dollars.

Tomas ! Do I look
like I'm made of money ?

[ Laughs ]

[ Liquid Bubbling ]

It's ready.
Ahh. Good timing.
I need a drink.

[ Both Laughing ]

Down the hatch !

[ Coughing ]

Ohh ! Whoo !
[ Giggles ]

It's at least
a thousand proof.

Now, try it
with some apple juice.

[ Sighs ]

[ Coughs, Pants ]

Momo,
you're a genius !

[ Girls Shouting ]

Keep going, men.
Play defense.
Get ready for the bully.

This shouldn't be a secret.
You should tell all the others
about the school going coed.

Throw the whole question
into debate.
You tell a single soul,

and I'll tell Abby Sawyer
about your plans for Dennis.

I know what you're afraid of.
You're afraid they actually
might like the idea, right ?

And everything has
to be your way, no matter
what anybody else wants.

You're a totalitarian.
[ Whistle Blows ]

Come on, Verena,
the school going coed
is not the end of the world.

You don't understand !
You don't belong here !
You don't deserve it !

[ Knocking ]

- Abby, your parents
are downstairs.
- Oh, okay. Thanks.

Have a nice weekend, Ab.

Bye.

[ Shrieks ]

What happened
to Abby Sawyer's hair ?

Someone put peroxide
in her setting lotion.

[ Sobbing ]

They all hate me.

Nobody could
hate you, sugar.
Page.

- We'll be up in a second.
- Sometimes...

I just want to tear off
all my stars and be
just like everybody else.

Abby Sawyer,
when you are at the top,

there are always jealous people
who try to shoot you down.

Well, you just pick up
your chin and you say, "pooh" !

Now, when we get home tonight,
we'll put a nice rinse
on that hair.

Tonight ? I thought I was
going with you now.
Come on, Harvey.

- We have a meeting of the
Board of Trustees, lovey.
- But I'm all packed.

Abby, in a couple of weeks
you will understand what
all the mystery is about.

I can't even remember
what they look like.
[ Chuckles ]

Anyway, I think
it's important--

I'm here
to see my daughter.
Tinka Parker.

Uh, dear, will you tell
Tinka her father's here ?

Tinka's dad's dead.

Excuse me. I think
I left my yacht running.
Hee-hee--

[ Cackling ]
Get the guard !

G'day !

The plan needs
a final flourish.

A dagger in the heart
of St. Ambrose.

Do you suppose any of the boys
in the choir is related
to one of the trustees ?

Let's check the yearbook.
I think there's
a list of trustees.

[ Boys Chattering ]
Uh, hello.

[ Verena ]
Hello. Is this Mr. Frost
to whom I'm speaking ?

Yeah.
This is Mrs. Mortimer Frost
calling from England.

My husband has
just passed away
and left an inheritance.

I'm trying to locate his heirs.
Are you, by any chance,

- Bradley Stoner Frost, Jr. ?
- No. He's my grandfather.

Ahh. And your grandfather
is a member of the St. Ambrose
Board of Trustees ?

Yes.
Well, up your ziggie
with a wah-wah brush.

Yup. He's in the choir.

He's mine.

* Let me in, wee-ooh
* Wee-ooh, wee-ooh

* Ooh, wee-ooh

* Wee-ooh, wee-ooh

* Ooh, wee-ooh
Wee-ooh *

* I can see the dance band
The silhouettes on the shade *

* I hear the music
All the lovers on parade *

* Open up
I want to come in again *

* I thought
you were my friend *

* Pitter-patter
of those feet *

* Movin' and a-groovin'
with that beat *

* Jumpin' and stompin'
on the floor *

* Let me in, open up
* Let me in
Open up *

* Why don't you
open up that door *

* I hear music
Let me in **

The master race
has arrived.

Headmaster--
Headmaster Armstrong.
Yes.

And this is Mr. Bert Chubb,
one of our housemasters,

and Graham John,
our choirmaster.

Uh, how do you do
and welcome to Miss Godard's.

We've got about 80 dollars
in the kitty.

It goes to whoever's date
has the largest set of nay-nays.

You must furnish proof.
Our roving photographer
will find you.

Let's go.
Masterly.

[ Whispering, Chatter ]

And then there's
the brown one.
She's the biggest one--

Girls, you have
about 20 minutes to show
your dates around campus.

Then, when you hear the bell,
please escort them to the dining
room for an early dinner.

There will be
a tea dance at 6:00.

And then the concert
tonight at 8:00.

Come forward when
we call your names.

Schumacher.
Burgess.

Hi, my name's Charles.

[ Wolf Whistle ]
[ Laughing ]

- Fanning.
- Delacorte.

[ Giggling ]
Winslow.

[ Miss Phipps ]
Goldberg.

Todd Winslow.
How do you do ?

Theresa Goldberg.
Nice to meet you.
[ Gasps ]

[ Boy ] We've got a winner.
[ Boy #2 ] I think
we do have a winner.

[ Snide Chuckling ]

[ Chubb ]
Purvis.
[ Phipps ] Wang.

Hi.

Frost.
Sawyer.

Hmph. Miss Phipps, I was
supposed to get Frost.
I signed up for him.

Abby, you
changed the list ?

Verena, everyone has been
matched by height.

You are too tall
for Mr. Frost.

You date
is Mr. Bateman.
[ Whispering ]

I'm-I'm Conrad. Or you can
call me Connie or Darnoc, which
is my name backwards.

[ Sighs ]
Come on, Car Wreck.

Well, I think Nixon lost
the election because
of his enormous jowls.

[ Laughing ]
You're terrible.

I mean, the least
he could have done was put
a brassiere on for television.

Stop, please !
I'll burst !

What size cup would
you say he was ?

Are you a soprano or an alto ?
I'm a tenor but I can go...

as high as an alto,
because sometimes--
Excuse me for a moment.

Oh !

Oh, I'm so maladroit !
[ Frost ] Oh, geez.
Are you all right ?

Can you ever forgive me ?

Never.

Better go change.

I will
be right back.

Oh--

My name's Verena.
Have you seen the gym,
Mr. Frost ?

Uh, Frosty.
Frosty Frost.

[ Odette ] Dear Dennis:
Be careful no one sees you
when you come in the back way.

You'll be safe once you
put on the jacket and tie.

Then everyone will think
you're a St. Ambrose boy.

Don't forget to put
the rubbers in your pocket.

If a guard stops you,
eat them.

[ Armstrong ]
What an extraordinarily
attractive group...

of young ladies
you have at Miss Godard's.

Won't they look good
on the cover of your brochure ?

Yes. Might encourage
enrollment.

Or we could redesign
their school uniform:

shorter skirts,
plunging necklines.

[ Chuckles ]
Well, I--

[ Sighs ]

Are we allowed
to be in here ?
No.

- You want one ?
- Uh--

We could get high.

What, with aspirin
and Coke ?

Come off it.
[ Chuckles ]
That doesn't work.

But did you ever try
Midol with Coke ?

No.

- [ Sighs ]
- Wow, you're pretty vigorous.

These look
more like Miltowns.

I wish they were.

[ Clears Throat ]
My mom, she eats 'em
like potato chips.

She's exceptionally happy,
but she bumps
into the furniture a lot.

Just like my mom.
Where do you think
I got the pills ?

- So they are Miltowns ?
- No. No, Midols--
for cramps.

Ah.

My ma doesn't get
cramps anymore,
she gets subpoenas.

- What ?
- She and my dad are constantly
slugging it out in court.

It's a situation I don't like
being in the middle of.

I know.
It's not much fun.

Oh, you know
what is fun though ?
Codeine and rubber cement.

I can be
a lot of fun.

No doubt.

I have a reputation for being
sort of wild and loose.

[ Chuckles Nervously ]

You got-- Co-Could I have
another Midol ?

[ Whispers ]
Thanks.

Would you like to come up
to my room later ?

Ah, you're allowed
to have boys in your dorm ?

Of course not. But there's
a secret door I'll show you.
You won't get caught.

Well I'd love it
if I got caught.

Yeah. I've tried and tried
to get kicked out
of St. Ambrose, but...

my grandfather,
he'd just get me
kicked right back in.

He's head of
the board of trustees.

Why don't you like
the school ?

I don't fit in.
It's--

All the guys at St. Ambrose
are marchin' off
the same cliff, you know.

The seat on the stock exchange.
The wife.
The three-point-two children.

- Yeah. The colonial.
The collie.
- Yeah.

How you feeling ?
[ Laughs ]

No cramps.

[ Creaking ]

* Gee whiz

* Look in his eyes

* Gee whiz

* How they hypnotize

* He's got everything

* [ Continues, Indistinct ]
It's been a long time.

Yeah.

You seem taller.

No.
I'm the same.

* Gee whiz *

[ Chattering, Indistinct ]
Verena, you may not abandon
your date. That's the rule.

But Abby left him.

I'll take care of Mr. Frost
until Abby gets back.

Now go and be a proper hostess
to Mr. Bateman.

Have you seen
the new science building ?

This is great. Every 15 minutes
I get a new date.
[ Chuckles ]

Verena.
That's Hungarian, right ?

But then it'd be,
[ Hungarian Accent ] Verena.
Excuse me,

See I--
I have to set up
the refreshments.

* [ Continues ]

* I love that guy

* Gee whiz

* My valentine
So...

we're really gonna do it
this time ?

Yeah. I mean,
if you still want to.

Are you kidding ?

Did you bring, um--
Yeah.

Bourbon,

and, ah--

Conceptive foam ?

Dennis, I thought you were
going to bring,
you know, rubbers.

This is something new.
The girl puts it in.

Eew.

I can't read this.

Okay.
Here's the diagram.

I think you have to
lie back with...

your knees up
to get it in.

* Look out, Jerry
Look out *

* There's a big bad bird
that's flyin' high *

[ Girl ] It's good to see you.
* Twist that pony
Do the bird with me *

* Aye yah yah yah
yah yah *

* Twist that pony
Do the bird with me *

* Aye yah yah yah
yah yah *

Looks like this dance is,
ah, going pretty good, huh ?
She's lookin' at ya.

Are you gonna ask
that guy to dance ?

* Do the bird
Do the bird *

* Do the shimmy shimmy
* Do the bird
Do the bird *

* Do the bird
Do the bird *

* Come on we're gonna
* Twist and ride

* Pony ride
shake and shout *

* Harder and harder

* Hey, baby,
do the bird with me *

* Yes

* Come on, baby,
to the sky up above *

Some libation, please.
* Yah yah yah
yah yah *

* [ Continues, Indistinct ]

This is special stuff
we made just for you.

If you want some more,
ask for the mystery punch.

It's spiked.
Masterly.

D-Did you guys
taste the punch ?

Come on.
Let's go get some more.

[ All Chattering
Indistinctly ]

Hold the applicator
firmly upright...

and apply pressure
downwards.

[ Grunts ]
I am.

Did you shake it well ?
Give it to me.

Okay.

[ Screams ]

[ Scoffs ]
Good going, Dennis.

Maybe we could get it in
with a spoon.

The girls would move
into this house.

I want to inform you
that I was not born yesterday.

I know precisely
what is going on here.

I beg your pardon.
This whole scheme
was cooked up...

by Harvey Sawyer
and his real estate buddies.

They want to buy this campus
for subdivision.

This has nothing to do with me,
or with you, for that matter.

The merger is a fait accompli.

- We must forge on and
look on the positive side.
- There is no positive side.

With all due respect,
Miss McVane, I think
you were born yesterday.

I fail to see any way...

that Miss Godard's benefits
from an association
with St. Ambrose--

We have a rich
and very generous alumni.

That should be
enough for you.
It's a
bottom-of-the-heap school...

for boys who are too dumb
or unruly to--

I'll have to report
to the trustees that you and I
are unable to work together.

Of course, one of us...

will be removed.

I apologize.

Please forgive me.

Wouldn't you be happier
if you resigned ?

I can't.

Miss Godard's...

is my home.

I know that feeling.

[ Glass Rattling ]

* That your love's
untrue *

You're all done ?
Uh-huh.

Come on, beautiful.
Let's begin the beguine.

Later, Car Wreck.
First, suck on this.

* But now you come to me
sayin' *

* Baby, I'm gonna
leave ya *

* And I'm beggin' ya
this time, darlin'
don't make me believe ya *

* Baby, baby, baby, baby
* Don't, don't, don't, don't

* Baby, baby, don't play
with my heart *
* Don't, don't

[ Groans ]

* [ Continues, Indistinct ]
Look at Tinka.
She's at it again.

Do you know you can tell
the way a person is by
the texture of the skin...

on the back
of their hand.

It's very soft.

You're sensitive
and refined.

Ooh. It's rough.

Yeah. I'm callous
and unfeeling.

[ Laughing ]
Get out, you.

Theresa...

Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.

Break it up, please.

Is there somewhere
where we could be alone ?
We could try the gym.

* Bring him to me
Masterly.

* Bring him to me

* I'm asking God
in His house *

* And the angels above

* To send me
send me, send me *
[ Screams ]

[ Screaming Continues ]
[ Boy Laughing ]

Oh !
Poor Abby.

This is not your night.
Better go change.

You stay away from my date.
I am warning you !

Verena.
* My friends
all tell me *

* Go to him, run to him
What is wrong
with that Frost boy ?

* And tell him
He's a perpetual
problem, that one.

* He's all wrong
Get him outta here.
Go ! Go !

* He's in my heart I know it
But it's so hard to show it *

* 'Cause it's easier
[ Loud Thud, Indistinct ]

* Easier said
than done *

* My body's tellin' me
fight with him
sigh to him *

* Tell him I would
die for him
and tell him *

* He's the one
[ Moaning ]

Come on.
* Although he gives me a feeling
that sets my heart a reelin' *

* Yeah, it's easier
easier said than done *
[ Laughing ]

[ Groans ]

* Well, I know
that I love him so *
* I know *

* Hey, girl
I want you to know *

I-I-I'll stop
if you want me to.
Yeah. No.

* If you go
* Bye-bye, baby

* And, hey, girl
[ Soft Thud, Indistinct ]

Did you
hear something ?
No.

* Something deep
inside of me is going *

* To die

* If this is good-bye

* No, I beg you, please
* Bye-bye, baby

* Don't go away

- [ Gasps ]
- Masterly.

* No, no, no, no, no
no, no, don't *

* Don't go away
* Bye-bye, baby

- * Hey, hey, hey *
- Just keep your mouth shut.

Schumacher.

You owe me 80 bucks.
We got the photos.
We got--

How big were
the nay-nays ?
They were
like watermelons.

No. No. I don't know
about that one.

Maybe more like kumquats.
[ Loud Squeal ]

Hey, who are you guys ?
Want something,
fellas ?

- Get 'em ! [ Grunts ]
- [ Groaning ]

What's the matter, Tweety ?
I'm fat and ugly
and I wanna throw up.

Hey, what happened,
honey ?

I hate them.
They took pictures.

The pigs.
Who ?

Which one of you
is Todd Winslow ?
Not me.

Is one of you
Todd Winslow ?
[ Chattering, Indistinct ]

Take it easy, fellas.

Sir, I want to report
one of these boys.

You need a break from
this hormonal nightmare.
Shall we ?

Sir, this boy, he did something
horrible to Theresa Goldberg.

His name is Todd Winslow,
and I can't find him.

We'll call the FBI.

Excuse me, sir.
May I cut in ?

Snake. How did you
get in here ?

You're so beautiful
I could eat your teeth.

Where'd you get
these clothes ?

Ah, some preppy
gave 'em to me
after I beat him up.

Todd Winslow ?
You beat up Todd Winslow ?

Oh, you sweetheart.

Tinka in my arms.
I must be dreaming.

Pinch me.
I'll show ya where.

* And be my lady

[ Boy ]
Mind if I cut in ?

* Oh, my love, love, love
You're attractive, really.
Nice jacket. Hey, get lost.

* Day, it is so lonely
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.

* Yeah, now

* Might forget it

* So blue

* Time is all *
Verena.

[ Gasps ]
You're not supposed
to be awake.

- I'm probably not.
- Oh, rats.

Couldn't you just
sort of... pass out again ?

I probably would
if you kiss me.

I have to go clean up
the refreshments.

Is this really
your room ?

I wouldn't take you
for a Liberace fan.

Love him.

Listen, I'll be right back
and we'll have us
a wild time.

I-I'm chilly.

Could you
tuck me in ?

Hey.

[ Making Animal Noises ]

Who are those boys ?

Come on ! We gotta go.
We've been spotted.
Bye, honey.

I can't leave you.
I know a place
we can go.

Come on.
Don't give up.

I mean, even if
you got pregnant
I'd marry you.

Why ?

I've imagined it,
haven't you ?

Would we live in a colonial
with two cars and a collie ?

Sounds okay
to me.

Do you believe in
centralized government
or state's rights ?

I'd just like to know
who I'm marrying.

I get the distinct impression
you don't wanna do this anymore.

I just keep thinking that
you don't know me.

What are you talkin' about ?
I mean--

What's there to know ?

Hey.
Okay.

[ Dennis Groans ]
Well.

What a convenient
trysting place.

And right over
our heads.

Sir, ah--
This is, ah--
This is my fault.

It was totally
my idea.

It's clear to me that she...
lured you here--

put you in
a state of desire.

Oh, you're not to blame
for answering your impulses.

Ah, but-but, sir,
she-she's--

Young man, you'd better
get back to the dance.

Dennis, don't go !

I would like to deal with
Miss Sinclair alone.

She is in
a lot of trouble.

Hey, Dennis !
How'd it go ?

Come on, critters.

[ Mr. Dewey ]
Cozy.

Much nicer than
those sterile conference rooms.

Go ahead. Get me expelled.
I don't care.

And lose a gifted student ?

And yet
you should be punished.

I think we can
come to some kind of...
private arrangement.

[ Squeals ]

Get 'im !
Get 'im !
Who are you ?

How would you like us
to dispose of him, madam ?

[ Animal Noises ]
[ Mr. Dewey ]
Stop it ! Stop it, I say.

Stop. No !

[ All ] Three, two, one !
No !

Wait there for
Miss McVane !
Jesus Christ !

[ All Chattering, Laughing ]
Fellas, please.

At least throw me down
some clothes !

Here ya go.

Go stuff the big kielbasa,
Mr. Dewey.
[ All Laughing ]

[ All ]
* You put your whole foot in
You put your whole foot out *

* You put your whole foot in
and you shake it all about *

* You do the hokey pokey
and you turn yourself around *
[ Screams ]

* That's what
it's all about *

* You put your rocket in

* You put your rocket out
You put your rocket in *

Have you seen
my date ?
No, have you
seen my husband ?

* You do the hokey-pokey
and you turn yourself around *
No.

* That's what it's all about
Excuse me.

Did your date
go off with my date ?

* [ Continues, Indistinct ]
Hey, put your
whole date in !

- [ Screaming ]
- * You put your whole date in

* You put your whole date in
and you shake it all about *

You're all just
a bunch of...
dirty heads.

Ladies and gentlemen.
The dance is over !

[ Chattering and Screaming,
Indistinct ]

Excuse me.

[ Man ]
What are you boys doing ?
Now stop this !

Calling it a night ?

- Yes, Miss McVane.
- Where is Verena ?

- Gee, I don't know.
- Find her !

You guys, have you seen Verena ?
Is she up here ?

No.
Miss McVane is
on a warpath--
[ Screams ]

- Hey.
- Townies ?

Well, at least they're not
St. Ambrose boys.
[ Scoffs ]

Momo, listen,
I'm on your side now.
St. Ambrose bites.

Then help me.
I can't find Verena anywhere.

Okay. I'll look for her.
Come on. The concert's
about to begin.

Snake, wait here.
Well, you're gonna
leave me--

[ Boy #1 ]
She's sucking his face off.
[ Boy #2 ] He's the king.

I'll be right back.

Oh, schoolmaids.
Heaven is where you are.

[ All ]
* Me, may, my, mo, moo *
[ Burps ]

Are they all
accounted for ?
No. Five boys
are missing.

Frost, Dinwiddy, Adams,
Schumacher and Todd Winslow.
Well, find Chubb.

No. No.
I'll find Chubb.
You find those boys.

[ Chattering, Indistinct ]

Did you find
Von Stefan ?
No.

I even checked
her dorm room.

Something untoward
is about to happen.
I can feel it.

I better go.
The concert.

Well, what about me ?
I have to get caught
in your bed.

Oh... someone will
come along.

You could start screaming
like you just
came into your room.

Well, actually...

this isn't my room.

I knew you couldn't be
a Liberace fan.

I really gotta go.

But...

even after you're expelled
and everything,

will you write to me ?
Oh, yeah.

Psst.
Need to sober up ?

Yeah. That punch
was diabolical....

and I need
to sing my solo.

Take a swig of this
and pass it along
to the others.

What is it ?
Hair of the bird
that bit ya.

Takes a few minutes
to work.

Psst. You know what you need
to sober up ?

Take a swig of this, pass it
along to the other guys--
What are you guys doin' here ?

It's time for our entrance.
[ Mumbled ]

Pass this on down, man.

She's not coming back,
Snake.

She's ditched you.
Dead on the road.

But she kissed me.

Girls get very kissy
right before they
give you the shaft.

Yeah. Severance pay.
Yeah, you're right.

What's--

Outrageous !
They've all been drinking !

** [ Out Of Tune ]

* I dream of Jeannie
with the-- **

[ All Screaming ]

[ Screams ]
My dress !

What do we got here ?
We got briefs.

We got boxers.

Boxers again.
Briefs.

Cool tool. I'm a nature
photographer myself.

[ All Moaning ]

On the bus, Cooper !

Don't you smart me again.
On that bus, young man.

Get-- Oh.

Frost, you wipe
that smile off your face.
Where were you ?

[ Mrs. O'Boyle ]
Headmaster.

I hope you will discipline
this... human debris.

Let me assure you,

they will return
to St. Ambrose...

only to pack !

Frank ?

Who's in there ?

Well, Frank,

that about does it
for me.

They're gone.
I'd rather be
devoured by rats...

than be in the same school
with Todd Winslow.

It'll never
happen now.

That was so brilliant
what you and Verena did.

God, where is Verena ?

Odie, what's wrong ?
What happened ?

[ Miss McVane ]
You understand why you can no
longer attend Miss Godard's ?

Of course, the boy
will be expelled too.

Your father will
pick you up this afternoon.

We'll send your records on
to any school you apply to.

Mr. Dewey is leaving us
as well, if that cheers you.

- More tea ?
- No, thank you.

Cigarette ?

- Sure.
- Catch.

Quite a debacle,
the St. Ambrose choir dance.

Boys drinking liquor,
heaving up all over the stage--

I'd say they had too many
of your refreshments.

- My refreshments ?
- I have no proof, as usual,

but these events have
a certain style I've come
to identify with your handiwork.

I did it
for the school.

I know, dear.
I wish it had worked.

But the trustees
are going to hush up
the entire affair...

and proceed with plans
for coeducation.

I shall announce it to the
school before summer vacation.
No.

Won't be the first time
women have had
to marry for money.

You betrayed us.

No.

No.

Miss Godard's was betrayed
by her own.

Year after year,
I've been on my knees...

groveling to the alumnae
for handouts,

five dollars here,
ten dollars there--
big spenders--

The men give generously
to their schools.
It's a solid investment.

They're ensuring that a steady
supply of the nation's leaders
will be men.

Maybe you women don't give
because deep down
you know it's useless.

I might as well been teaching
needlepoint and gardening,

instead of physics
and government.

Twenty-eight years
of work,

just so I can kiss
some headmaster's ass.
Miss McVane !

You're right
to be afraid.

Because after the men
plant their flag in
this school, they'll bury us.

It'll be subtle
and insidious,
as is in real life.

I may be at the end
of the road here,
but you're young...

and you have the talent
and power to lead.

Don't stop the fight.

Wherever you go, Verena,
don't give up.

I'm counting on you.

Good-bye.

[ Chattering,
Indistinct ]

Just because I'm leaving
doesn't mean we have to stop
helping each other.

I mean,
we've joined forever.

The D.A.R. lives.

[ All ]
No more little
white gloves.

Okay. Everybody out.
I gotta pack.

I don't see how
you can sit on a horse
if Dennis did his job correctly.

Dennis was
a dead loss.

Well, you'll have
the St. Ambrose doofus
population to keep you company.

No. It didn't work ?

The school's
going coed.

Miss McVane is gonna
announce it on Prize Day.

It's over.

Don't be so sure.

What do you mean ?
Never mind.

Good-bye, Verena.

Hey, I'll buy
your magazine, okay ?

If you ever run for anything,
let me know.

I'll fix the competition.

Okay.

Verena's gone.
St. Ambrose is taking over.

Next year I'm going to have
to face Todd Winslow every day
at breakfast.

I want to retch
and die !

They're going to pull down
our grade curve.

They're going to pull down
more than that.

Ladies,
it's time to put on
our thinking caps.

[ Applause ]
[ Miss McVane ]
And that concludes our...

Prize Day ceremony.

I know you're all anxious
to get started with your summer,

but you must attend
final classes.

And I wish you all
a happy vacation.

[ Applauding,
Cheering ]

Before you go, ah,
there is some important news.

Indeed so important
that Mrs. Sawyer,

president of Miss Godard's
Board of Trustees,

is here this morning
to tell you herself.

[ Scattered Applause ]

Good morning.

I am very excited
to be standing here
on the threshold of--

as it were a new era.

Next year,
this school will admit--

for the first time--
members of the opposite sex.

[ Disgruntled Chattering ]
Specifically,
Miss Godard's...

will unite with
St. Ambrose Academy...

to form a single school
on their campus
in Stoneytown, New Hampshire.

A letter was sent
to your parents this morning
outlining the details of this--

- Mother, no !
- Quiet, please.

Our faculties will combine,
but our administrations
will be separate.

[ Mrs. Sawyer Continues,
Indistinct ]

Attention ! Attention,
I have something to say.
Everybody listen.

[ Girl #1 ] Just be quiet.
[ Girl #2 ] Hey, listen
to Odie. She's got an idea.

We have been gypped.

Some of you may think
this school going coed
is a great idea.

Others of you
may think it's horrendous.

But right now the point is
that the Board of Trustees
doesn't care what you think.

Did they ever
consult us ? No.

- Did they ever ask us
what we wanted ?
- [ All ] No. No.

We're only a pawn in
their game.
What is going on here ?

[ All Cheering ]
They teach us
self-government...

and then they
disenfranchise us.

[ Girl ] That's true.
They teach us
to take ourselves seriously...

and then they act
as if we don't count.

Well, hey, I say
this eats the big one.
We count.

[ Girl ] Yeah.
We wanna vote.
It's our future.

They expect us to stand around
and be docile and meek...

in our little white gloves
while they wield absolute power.

Well, I say,
"No more little white gloves."

- Let's hear it.
Do you wanna vote ?
- [ All ] Yeah !

Then demand to vote !
Follow me to the dorms...

and we'll lock ourselves in
until they agree to our terms !

- Come on, everybody.
Let's go !
- [ All Cheering ]

What about it, Page ?
Wanna give these kids a vote ?

Don't be absurd.

Anybody that doesn't
go back to class immediately
will be suspended !

Abby. Abigail, you have
an insurrection on your hands.

Let's see how
you handle yourself
in a crisis.

Mother, up your ziggie
with a wah-wah brush.

Now, girls--
[ Whimpering ]

Okay, now these go to
the parapet, third floor. Go !

You call all the newspapers.
You call the New York Times .

You call Life Magazine
and the Herald Tribune.

My dad owns that.
Really ? Okay, then
you call the Herald Tribune.

Ladies, no vote
is possible.

The decision of
the trustees is final.

Will you please
come out now...

or you all
face suspension.

[ Mrs. Sawyer ] "A voice
and a vote. Don't trust
the trustees." What ?

I want you to break
through that door
and clear the building.

I don't care if you have to pick
them up and carry them out
one by one.

In two hours, their parents
will be arriving
to take them home for vacation.

In two hours, this situation
must be under control !

Yes, ma'am.

[ Groaning ]

Out, or we
start swinging !

Now, miss,
put that down.

[ All Chanting ]
Vote ! Vote !

Okay. Come on.
Move it right up here
to the front.

No. No.
You-You are trespassing
on private property.

- And I happen to--
- [ Tinka ] Okay. I got it.

The board of trustees
has sold this school
down the river.

They want us
to go coed with
the St. Ambrose Academy,

which is notorious for
their drunken behavior,

loose morals
and lousy singing.

Tinka ?
Tinka !

There must be some way
to get them out of there.

Well, there's tear gas.
But they're just a bunch
of little girls, ma'am.

They are not just
a bunch of girls.
They are Miss Godard's girls--

they're organized !
Well, we could
surround the building...

and come in from all sides,
if you don't mind us breaking
a few windows.

Do it !
Go on !
No !

* [ "Call To The Post" ]

[ Horses Neighing ]

[ Man ]
All right, girls.

Okay, girls,
next to them.

Back 'em up.
Let's go !
Let's get out of here !

[ Screaming, Chattering
Indistinctly ]

Please. Please.
Please.

Parents will please
convene in the chapel,

where Mrs. Sawyer
will answer all your questions.

Me !
Marsha !
Face the music, Page.

I'm going into the dorm
to talk with the girls.

Ah, to the chapel.

Doesn't 75 years of history
mean anything to you ?

- You can't railroad this--
- Our bylaws state that
the board of trustees--

[ Miss McVane ]
I know you all feel
left out of the process.

But legally the trustees
can take any action they choose.

You have no rights !
And neither do I.

If you don't like their
decision, all you can do
is not come back next year.

And all I can do is quit !
These are your choices.

It doesn't have to be
like that.

We can amend
the bylaws.

We want to elect our own
student representative.

We can do that right now.
Then all the students
will vote on coeducation...

- and it will count
as one trustee vote.
- They won't permit that.

Otherwise, we won't
move from here.

And we have enough canned food
to last us here for months.

We've got
the ballots ready.

No, Odette.
Right, everybody.
[ Odette ] Please.

- No, Odette !
- Please ! Miss McVane,

Miss Godard's gave us a voice
so now it's kind of hard
to shut up.

This is all
rather new to me.

Carry on, Odette.

Now, this may seem
pretty simple,

but now it's time
to decide how you really feel
about Miss Godard's.

Some of you may think
of this place as a prison,

some old-fashioned prude's
idea about keeping us
out of trouble...

because we can't be trusted
to look out for ourselves.

And you think times have changed
and we can hold our own
with boys.

So you'll vote "yes"
on coeducation.

Miss Godard's will disappear
like the dinosaurs.

Now, for others of you,
you think this place
has brought out the best in you.

In here they give you
the nerve to reach into yourself
and pull out your colors...

and wave them
as high as you can.

So, you'll vote "no"
on changing this place.

Because to you, Miss Godard's
isn't a prison at all.

It's a place
to be free.

[ Miss McVane ] And the results
of the informal student vote
are as follows:

For coeducation,

77 votes.

Against, 115.

And they have chosen
Odette Sinclair
as their representative,

should the board of trustees
decide to admit
one student member.

And, in addition, they want
to help the school out of
its financial troubles.

Each one of them,
without hesitation,
has donated whatever she can...

from her personal
savings account.

I have checks here
amounting to $3,000.

Now, maybe that's
a paltry amount,

but their generosity
just about broke my heart.

And I am sure that if
parents and alumnae
follow their example,

we can solve whatever
budget problems we have...

very, very soon.

These are your daughters.
You can be proud.

[ All Screaming,
Cheering ]

You're in trouble.
We're going home,
honey.

[ Reporter ] Yes, there's been
quite a turn of events.
The main mutiny is over...

and the "rebelettes"
are going home.

And the president of the board
of trustees and her husband
has resigned as well.

[ Tinka's Mom ]
It's all far too much
excitement for me.

I don't know why
you young girls have such
a great appetite for drama.

Still, I am glad you all
stopped them...
[ Animal Noises ]

from rushing
into this coeducation.

In many ways,
the old ways
are the best ways.

Oh, by the way,
the Wheelwright boy will be
back in town for the holidays,

and I thought since his parents
and I are such great friends,

that it was high time
the two of you were introduced.

* Those cuties have fun
can't wait to get home *
Bye, Odie !

Bye, Momo.
Bye, Tweety.
[ Tweety ] Bye, Odie !

- Bye ! See ya next year.
- [ Verena ] Odious !

- Verena !
- We drove down as soon as we
heard the news on the radio.

You were brilliant.

This is Frosty.
Hi.

Guess what ? We both
got accepted to Chancery.

We're going to be
going there in September.
Hmm.

Coed school will be
a nice change.

Excuse us, please.

You hypocrite.
I thought you said
you hated boys.

I know.
[ Sighs ]

But I've been thinking.
Perhaps they're like dogs.

If we don't take them in,
they run wild and they're
a danger to society.

Verena, up yours
with a Breck bottle.

[ Tinka ]
Bye, guys !

[ Together ] Bye !

Bye !
* Girlfriends for life

* Girlfriends

* For life

* Yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah *

* Talkin' about
my girlfriends *
* For life

* Girlfriends
* For life

* Girlfriends

* For life

* The goin' gets tough

* We ain't no fluff
Struttin' our stuff
with girlfriends *

* Shampooed and curl
Mascara and pearls *

* What's that word
We're girlfriends *
* For life

* Girlfriends
* For life

* Girlfriends

* For life

* Yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah **

* I hear Stacy
went out with him *

* What, is she crazy

* There she is
* She's walkin'
kinda funny *

* Let's ask her
* Hey, Stacy, what's new

* Met a boy so sweet

* He took me out
last week *

* For a movie
and a dinner *

* Then we parked
on a dead-end street *

* He said I've got
a present for you *

* I thought my dreams
were all coming true *

* I closed my eyes

* I fantasized

* I held out my hand

* Waited for
my big surprise *

* Was it a diamond ring

* Or a brand-new dress
* Perfume, I bet

* Well, can't you guess

* Oh, oh, oh, oh

* A hairy bird

* What could I say

* So new to romance

* I looked up
at his face *
* Don't look down

* I looked down
at his pants *

* When a guy asks for
the proof of your love *

* Do you spit out your gum
Do you put on a glove *

* What are the rules

* The etiquette

* All the things
Mama told me *

* Are inappropriate

* Girl, what are ya
carryin' on about *

* Come on,
talk English *

* Do I have to spell
it out *

* Oh, oh, oh, oh

* A hairy bird

* So, how big was it

* Well, smaller than
a mailbox *

* But bigger than one of those
little cocktail things *

* Was it long
* Well, pretty long

* But he's not
Vlad the Impaler *

* Go on
Go on *

* Go on
* Okay

* So, I thought
what would it hurt *

* One little bite

* But on your wedding day

* You couldn't wear white
* Oh, no

* I jumped out of his car
like a comet *

* And I guess I must have
slammed the door on it *

* Look out, look out,
look out *
[ Boy Screaming ]

* Oh, oh, oh, oh

* A hairy bird

* Everybody, have you heard
the word *

* She slammed the door
and she crushed that bird *

* Oh, oh, oh, oh

* The hairy bird

* Everybody, have you heard
the word *
* Oh, oh, oh

* She slammed the door
and she crushed that bird *
* Oh, oh

* Oh, oh, oh, oh
* The hairy bird

* Everybody, have you heard
the word *
* Oh, oh, oh

* She slammed the door
and she crushed that bird **