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Subtitles by explosiveskull
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(cheerful ice cream truck type music)
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[Mark] Everything looks the same.
4
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Well, that's deceiving,
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'cause everything has gotten worse.
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I got to check on a bunch of families
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that we have in houses.
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The city is not housing anybody,
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hasn't been housing anybody
in, like, five years.
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We just had about 22 families
at the St. Mark's Church.
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I got to figure out the farm.
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The city came in the middle of the night
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at, like, three in the morning or whatever,
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and dug up our farm.
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I got ordained online so
that I could bury people.
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'Cause we literally had,
like, four deaths back to back.
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I've been fighting for,
like, the last couple years
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to try and find out what's
wrong with your brother.
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He's been diagnosed with Asperger's,
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which is on the autism spectrum.
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Come on, let's take the tour.
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All right.
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The kitchen, the living
room, and your brother's room.
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You can take this mattress
here, take it downstairs,
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put it in Guillermo's room.
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And then I also put your blue
box in your brother's room.
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And all your things are in there.
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All right.
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You know, I can help you
clean up later, anything.
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[Cheri] That would be great.
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All right. I'm gonna go get set up.
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It's good to have you home, honey.
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It's good to be home.
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Hey!
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Come here, man, God.
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I love you.
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Let me look at you.
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My God, you turned into
a freaking giant, man!
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(sighs) I dig your hair.
40
00:04:06,569 --> 00:04:07,869
I think I need a haircut.
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It looks good to me.
42
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You look like a lumberjack.
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(laughs) All right, thank you.
44
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I know.
45
00:04:14,110 --> 00:04:15,876
I do, don't I?
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So what's up?
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Tell me everything.
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00:04:17,514 --> 00:04:18,980
What do you want to know about?
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00:04:18,982 --> 00:04:20,214
Everything.
50
00:04:20,216 --> 00:04:22,683
What are you into?
51
00:04:22,685 --> 00:04:24,853
Video games, comic books.
52
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Right.
53
00:04:25,689 --> 00:04:26,855
I really like movies.
54
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In fact, one day I hope to make my own.
55
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That's awesome.
56
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I'm sure you'd be incredible at that.
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What's up with school?
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00:04:35,531 --> 00:04:37,868
Honestly, well, I got into
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this pretty high and prestigious school.
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'Cause I'm pretty smart.
61
00:04:44,141 --> 00:04:47,011
And I really enjoy that aspect of it.
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00:04:48,077 --> 00:04:50,045
But I'm bullied a lot.
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Really?
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00:04:51,081 --> 00:04:52,247
Yeah, it's okay.
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00:04:52,249 --> 00:04:55,086
In 5th grade, my first year there,
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I was being verbally tormented
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by this one kid and his friends.
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00:05:01,925 --> 00:05:03,658
The teachers really wouldn't do anything,
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'cause they just said he was just talking
70
00:05:05,795 --> 00:05:08,863
and not doing anything really bad.
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00:05:08,865 --> 00:05:10,197
Until the end of the school year,
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we were in the boys' locker room.
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And he beat me up.
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Okay.
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00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:18,807
I'm a pacifist, so I didn't fight back.
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00:05:18,809 --> 00:05:20,812
But when I could get up,
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I stood up and I screamed at everybody.
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'Cause, like, they were saying stuff
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like they're going to kill
me, I shouldn't be alive,
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I shouldn't go to school there.
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I got insanely mad.
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And I started screaming like
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no, I deserve to be here as much as you do.
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I'm not weird.
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And you're not gonna kill
me, I'm gonna kill you.
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And then the school forced
me to get mandatory therapy.
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Not because they were tormenting me,
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but because I said I was
going to kill them out loud.
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Ah.
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00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:00,048
[Guillermo] Yeah.
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That sounds really hard.
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Mmm hm.
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I'm really sorry.
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I'm sorry you had to go through that.
95
00:06:06,122 --> 00:06:08,156
Do you tell Mom about what's going on?
96
00:06:08,158 --> 00:06:09,457
We're trying to deal with it.
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00:06:09,459 --> 00:06:16,298
But Mom's more concerned with my
recent diagnosis of Asperger's.
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00:06:16,300 --> 00:06:17,433
Okay.
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00:06:17,435 --> 00:06:21,605
With my anger and everything
that's been going on,
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occasionally I feel suicidal
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after some of the stuff they say.
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Right.
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00:06:27,810 --> 00:06:28,976
And occasionally homicidal,
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of me wanting to get back
at them for the kind of stuff
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they do to me with no
repercussions whatsoever.
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That's why I really like just coming home
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00:06:39,221 --> 00:06:41,089
and getting away from it all.
108
00:06:41,091 --> 00:06:45,026
That's why I'm very excited
for spring break next week.
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I really want to get, like,
far away from my school.
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So where's a good pizza spot?
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Over at Joyce, it's down that way.
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00:07:02,144 --> 00:07:04,980
[Mark] You ever hang out in this park?
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00:07:04,982 --> 00:07:06,914
[Guillermo] Sometimes, I prefer the inside.
114
00:07:06,916 --> 00:07:10,985
But regardless, I come
out here occasionally.
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[Mark] Cool.
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[Guillermo] Not big for cutting
through the grass though.
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[Mark] Why is that?
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[Guillermo] A lot of dogs come this way.
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[Mark] Ah.
120
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Oh, man, it's nice being out.
121
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Been used to seeing a
whole lot of concrete.
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00:07:37,180 --> 00:07:39,380
So you still don't think I need a haircut?
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[Mark] Maybe, I'll cut it for you.
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I don't like those chances.
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Umm.
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This is like the first
real meal that I've eaten.
127
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Why, you didn't like the slop in prison?
128
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No, I didn't.
129
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That's exactly what it was.
130
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It was like they blended
up dog and served it to you.
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Great conversation to
have while we're eating.
132
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Right, sorry, I'll stop talking about it.
133
00:08:06,309 --> 00:08:10,010
What's it like on the outside?
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It feels weird.
135
00:08:12,214 --> 00:08:15,115
Kind of feels weird 'cause
it feels kind of normal,
136
00:08:15,117 --> 00:08:16,151
you know?
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Like I haven't skipped a beat.
138
00:08:21,158 --> 00:08:22,356
But, I don't know.
139
00:08:22,358 --> 00:08:24,224
It also kind of feels like
I've been born again, you know?
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It's like fresh, everything's fresh.
141
00:08:27,798 --> 00:08:29,363
And then sad.
142
00:08:29,365 --> 00:08:30,298
You know, it's kind of sad.
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00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:31,399
I got a lot of memories,
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a lot of stuff that this
neighborhood reminds me of.
145
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Getting pretty metaphysical, aren't you?
146
00:08:37,039 --> 00:08:37,872
Mmm hmm.
147
00:08:37,874 --> 00:08:38,973
What do you think?
148
00:08:38,975 --> 00:08:40,108
Why are we here?
149
00:08:40,110 --> 00:08:41,042
What does this all mean?
150
00:08:41,044 --> 00:08:43,177
I'm 13, so I haven't really figured out
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those kind of questions yet.
152
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I do like Plato.
153
00:08:47,817 --> 00:08:48,916
Okay.
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00:08:48,918 --> 00:08:52,087
I like his theory of, his
philosophy of the cave.
155
00:08:52,089 --> 00:08:56,060
Imagine you had three people
that were chained in a cave.
156
00:08:56,493 --> 00:08:59,127
And the way they were chained,
157
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they were always looking
at one wall of the cave,
158
00:09:03,133 --> 00:09:05,266
and could never move their heads.
159
00:09:05,268 --> 00:09:07,068
So they could never
see the other two people
160
00:09:07,070 --> 00:09:10,438
that were there, opposed from hearing them.
161
00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:14,812
Now imagine somebody brought
a light into the cave,
162
00:09:16,312 --> 00:09:18,149
and a shadow was cast.
163
00:09:20,250 --> 00:09:21,382
That would blow their mind.
164
00:09:21,384 --> 00:09:24,919
Because at that point, they'd
only have seen the wall,
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00:09:24,921 --> 00:09:27,254
and now there were images on the wall.
166
00:09:27,256 --> 00:09:29,089
And then if you took that a step further
167
00:09:29,091 --> 00:09:32,026
by letting one of them go, and
then letting them outside...
168
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[Man] What the fuck? Yo.
169
00:09:34,130 --> 00:09:36,765
- Holy shit.
- Yo, what's up Mark?
170
00:09:36,767 --> 00:09:38,166
- What's up, Galen?
- Man, how you doing, baby?
171
00:09:38,168 --> 00:09:39,133
It's good to see you man.
172
00:09:39,135 --> 00:09:40,002
[Mark] Oh my God.
173
00:09:40,004 --> 00:09:41,536
What's up, G? How's it going, buddy?
174
00:09:41,538 --> 00:09:43,036
[Mark] Damn, man.
175
00:09:43,038 --> 00:09:44,204
Yeah, man, it's been a minute, man.
176
00:09:44,206 --> 00:09:45,239
How you been doing?
177
00:09:45,241 --> 00:09:46,174
[Mark] I've been great, man.
178
00:09:46,176 --> 00:09:47,242
What are you doing around here?
179
00:09:47,244 --> 00:09:48,977
Oh, I work around here.
So I'm going to stop and
180
00:09:48,979 --> 00:09:50,377
get something to eat before I shoot home,
181
00:09:50,379 --> 00:09:51,478
you know what I mean?
182
00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:53,046
- Looking good, man.
- No, you looking good too, man.
183
00:09:53,048 --> 00:09:54,382
Thank you, bro. Thank you man.
184
00:09:54,384 --> 00:09:55,849
I heard you was holding it down, (mutters).
185
00:09:55,851 --> 00:09:58,085
[Mark] Yeah, you know, I was keeping
my head up, man, doing my thing.
186
00:09:58,087 --> 00:10:00,155
Yeah, that's what's up,
that's what's up, yeah.
187
00:10:00,157 --> 00:10:01,421
[Mark] How's the family?
188
00:10:01,423 --> 00:10:03,023
Family's doing good, you know what I mean?
189
00:10:03,025 --> 00:10:05,225
You know, and I got a son
now, you know what I mean?
190
00:10:05,227 --> 00:10:06,227
[Mark] Shit, that's right.
191
00:10:06,229 --> 00:10:08,429
(laughs) Yeah, he's about to be five, man,
192
00:10:08,431 --> 00:10:09,964
yeah, yeah.
193
00:10:09,966 --> 00:10:12,967
- So it's good seeing you though, man.
- [Mark] Good seeing you too, man.
194
00:10:12,969 --> 00:10:15,136
I've just been hanging out with G here.
195
00:10:15,138 --> 00:10:16,337
Mr. Brainiac.
196
00:10:16,339 --> 00:10:17,305
[Mark] Yeah.
197
00:10:17,307 --> 00:10:18,839
Yeah.
198
00:10:18,841 --> 00:10:21,508
So, um, you heard from
Antoine, you seen Antoine?
199
00:10:21,510 --> 00:10:22,944
[Mark] No, I ain't seen him yet.
200
00:10:22,946 --> 00:10:25,079
Oh, all right, okay, cool, yeah.
201
00:10:25,081 --> 00:10:27,015
Well, you know, I'm kind of
busy, you know what I mean,
202
00:10:27,017 --> 00:10:28,081
I'm about to shoot home and stuff.
203
00:10:28,083 --> 00:10:29,083
So, you know what I mean?
204
00:10:29,085 --> 00:10:30,151
It's good seeing you, man.
205
00:10:30,153 --> 00:10:31,518
You got to hit me up, man,
so we can get together.
206
00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:33,954
- [Mark] Yeah, man, we got to chill.
- Yeah, no doubt, no doubt.
207
00:10:33,956 --> 00:10:35,089
All right, G, man, take it easy.
208
00:10:35,091 --> 00:10:36,156
Always a pleasure.
209
00:10:36,158 --> 00:10:37,157
[Mark] Be well.
210
00:10:37,159 --> 00:10:38,158
[Galen] No doubt.
211
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:41,028
[Mark] Wow, I can't
believe his son is five.
212
00:10:41,030 --> 00:10:44,098
[Guillermo] Time flies
when you're in a cell.
213
00:10:44,100 --> 00:10:45,566
My mind would just be thinking
214
00:10:45,568 --> 00:10:48,169
and thinking and thinking and thinking.
215
00:10:48,171 --> 00:10:52,143
Thinking about everyone, and
everything on the outside.
216
00:10:54,177 --> 00:10:55,812
I couldn't sleep.
217
00:10:58,114 --> 00:11:01,181
And so I had to figure out a way
218
00:11:01,183 --> 00:11:03,084
to practice getting to sleep.
219
00:11:03,086 --> 00:11:07,024
How to get out of my
mind, and into my heart.
220
00:11:14,297 --> 00:11:15,199
I love you.
221
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:19,302
Good night.
222
00:11:28,177 --> 00:11:29,911
I'll be right here in the morning.
223
00:11:29,913 --> 00:11:31,546
[Man] Motherfucking cop
was hanging a U-turn.
224
00:11:31,548 --> 00:11:32,480
(Cheri laughs)
225
00:11:32,482 --> 00:11:33,348
[Man] And some of these, they're like,
226
00:11:33,350 --> 00:11:35,382
"Yo open." They asked for the license.
227
00:11:35,384 --> 00:11:36,884
They're like "Open the door."
228
00:11:36,886 --> 00:11:37,986
- Oh.
- Hey.
229
00:11:37,988 --> 00:11:40,188
This is my son here.
230
00:11:40,190 --> 00:11:41,321
This is Chucky.
231
00:11:41,323 --> 00:11:42,390
Chucky, good to meet you, man.
232
00:11:42,392 --> 00:11:43,992
And this is my man.
233
00:11:43,994 --> 00:11:45,059
- Hey, how's it going?
- Smoke.
234
00:11:45,061 --> 00:11:46,227
- Hey Smoke.
- Nice to meet you.
235
00:11:46,229 --> 00:11:47,395
- Good to meet you.
- Welcome home.
236
00:11:47,397 --> 00:11:49,430
Thank you, guys.
237
00:11:49,432 --> 00:11:51,969
I'm gonna go out for a walk.
238
00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:55,169
I'll be back in a little bit.
239
00:11:55,171 --> 00:11:56,003
Good to meet you.
240
00:11:56,005 --> 00:11:56,671
- Likewise.
- Yeah.
241
00:11:56,673 --> 00:11:57,939
- Be safe, man.
- I will.
242
00:11:57,941 --> 00:11:58,573
Have a great night.
243
00:11:58,575 --> 00:11:59,473
- You too.
- All right.
244
00:11:59,475 --> 00:12:00,307
I love you, Mom.
245
00:12:00,309 --> 00:12:01,376
I love you, too.
246
00:12:01,378 --> 00:12:03,544
All right, so Chucky (laughs)
247
00:12:03,546 --> 00:12:05,213
[Chucky] Can't tell you all that.
248
00:12:05,215 --> 00:12:07,451
(both laughing)
249
00:13:59,261 --> 00:14:00,195
- Yo, Mark!
- Yo.
250
00:14:00,197 --> 00:14:02,262
- What's going on, man?
- What's up, man?
251
00:14:02,264 --> 00:14:03,131
How you doing, man?
252
00:14:03,133 --> 00:14:04,331
[Mark] I'm great, man, good to see you.
253
00:14:04,333 --> 00:14:06,467
Good to see you too, man,
almost didn't recognize you.
254
00:14:06,469 --> 00:14:07,300
[Mark] Is Antoine here?
255
00:14:07,302 --> 00:14:08,136
Yeah, he's here man.
256
00:14:08,138 --> 00:14:09,103
Okay.
257
00:14:09,105 --> 00:14:10,037
He's, uh, doing his music.
258
00:14:10,039 --> 00:14:11,406
He's, uh, rapping right now, so.
259
00:14:11,408 --> 00:14:12,239
Oh, great.
260
00:14:12,241 --> 00:14:13,241
You know, be quiet,
261
00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:15,042
and we'll let him know
that everything's cool.
262
00:14:15,044 --> 00:14:17,210
♪ 'Cause money make the world go 'round
263
00:14:17,212 --> 00:14:20,214
♪ 'Cause money make the world go 'round
264
00:14:20,216 --> 00:14:21,516
What? Get the...
265
00:14:21,518 --> 00:14:22,418
For real.
266
00:14:24,254 --> 00:14:25,085
What the fuck?
267
00:14:25,087 --> 00:14:25,719
Yo.
268
00:14:25,721 --> 00:14:27,421
[Mark] Yo.
269
00:14:27,423 --> 00:14:28,256
Yo!
270
00:14:28,258 --> 00:14:30,090
[Mark] Yo, shit!
271
00:14:30,092 --> 00:14:30,858
What's up, baby?
272
00:14:30,860 --> 00:14:32,259
- How are you?
- My fucking boy.
273
00:14:32,261 --> 00:14:33,161
What's up?
274
00:14:33,163 --> 00:14:34,630
[Mark] What's up, man?
275
00:14:39,335 --> 00:14:40,468
Huh?
276
00:14:40,470 --> 00:14:41,102
[Mark] This is dope.
277
00:14:41,104 --> 00:14:43,340
You like that? (laughs)
278
00:14:47,509 --> 00:14:48,675
[Antoine] Damn, my man.
279
00:14:48,677 --> 00:14:49,243
Out here.
280
00:14:49,245 --> 00:14:50,243
[Mark] Yeah, I know.
281
00:14:50,245 --> 00:14:51,813
[Antoine] Here, put that up for yourself.
282
00:14:51,815 --> 00:14:53,513
[Mark] Oh, good luck, man.
283
00:14:53,515 --> 00:14:54,681
- Appreciate it, man.
- Something light, man,
284
00:14:54,683 --> 00:14:56,084
a little starter kit, man, you know?
285
00:14:56,086 --> 00:14:57,151
Thank you, thank you.
286
00:14:57,153 --> 00:14:58,319
Get you a phone and all that.
287
00:14:58,321 --> 00:14:59,554
Mm, mm-hm.
288
00:14:59,556 --> 00:15:01,354
We'll talk about the rest
later, you know what I'm saying?
289
00:15:01,356 --> 00:15:03,223
Fill you in, man.
290
00:15:03,225 --> 00:15:04,358
So what's up, man?
291
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:05,195
Hmm.
292
00:15:07,363 --> 00:15:10,565
You know, just walking around, man.
293
00:15:10,567 --> 00:15:11,465
Taking everything in.
294
00:15:11,467 --> 00:15:14,569
Just trying to stay present, you know?
295
00:15:14,571 --> 00:15:15,270
I know, right?
296
00:15:15,272 --> 00:15:16,304
Breathe the air and shit, right?
297
00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:17,271
Mmm hmm, just stay...
298
00:15:17,273 --> 00:15:18,406
See the trees and all that.
299
00:15:18,408 --> 00:15:20,177
[Mark] Yeah, man.
300
00:15:21,811 --> 00:15:25,179
Yeah, look, um, real shit man.
301
00:15:25,181 --> 00:15:29,153
Like I know shit could have
went any other way, man.
302
00:15:30,153 --> 00:15:33,286
You took a nice hit for us, man.
303
00:15:33,288 --> 00:15:36,357
A lot of dudes would have
broke under that pressure, man.
304
00:15:36,359 --> 00:15:38,859
It would be no that without you.
305
00:15:38,861 --> 00:15:41,262
We definitely want to
commend you for that, man.
306
00:15:41,264 --> 00:15:42,229
You know what I'm saying?
307
00:15:42,231 --> 00:15:43,230
Yeah, no, man, it's all good, you know?
308
00:15:43,232 --> 00:15:44,065
Yeah, no doubt.
309
00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:45,432
I don't expect shit, man, you know?
310
00:15:45,434 --> 00:15:46,233
No doubt.
311
00:15:46,235 --> 00:15:47,102
I'd do that any other time, man.
312
00:15:47,104 --> 00:15:48,603
You always don't want nothing, huh?
313
00:15:48,605 --> 00:15:50,537
You just is you know I mean?
314
00:15:50,539 --> 00:15:51,772
No, I'm good, you know?
315
00:15:51,774 --> 00:15:53,406
- You...
- I'm just...
316
00:15:53,408 --> 00:15:55,408
No, I'm good.
317
00:15:55,410 --> 00:15:57,744
I mean this is, you know.
318
00:15:57,746 --> 00:15:58,778
Ah, no, man.
319
00:15:58,780 --> 00:16:00,214
This is gonna help.
320
00:16:00,216 --> 00:16:01,181
Damn!
321
00:16:01,183 --> 00:16:04,288
Yo, remember Cancun? (laughs)
322
00:16:10,659 --> 00:16:14,264
(men shouting in distance)
323
00:16:20,169 --> 00:16:21,437
[Man] Freeze!
324
00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:27,541
(Mark gasps)
325
00:16:27,543 --> 00:16:28,478
You okay?
326
00:16:30,179 --> 00:16:31,214
Yeah.
327
00:16:34,250 --> 00:16:36,552
I was just having a bad dream.
328
00:16:47,263 --> 00:16:50,234
I got to get ready for school.
329
00:17:16,259 --> 00:17:17,290
[Cheri] Honey!
330
00:17:17,292 --> 00:17:18,226
[Mark] Hmm?
331
00:17:18,228 --> 00:17:20,228
You got to get up, hon.
332
00:17:20,230 --> 00:17:21,261
Get up.
333
00:17:21,263 --> 00:17:21,898
I'm up.
334
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:23,797
[Cheri] We got to get going, come on.
335
00:17:23,799 --> 00:17:26,299
All right, well, I got to meditate first.
336
00:17:26,301 --> 00:17:27,735
[Cheri] Honey, we don't have time for that.
337
00:17:27,737 --> 00:17:29,003
Let's get going.
338
00:17:29,005 --> 00:17:29,836
What?
339
00:17:29,838 --> 00:17:30,537
[Cheri] I promised Sister Margaret
340
00:17:30,539 --> 00:17:31,538
we'd be there by nine o'clock.
341
00:17:31,540 --> 00:17:33,841
I also need to take you
around the neighborhood.
342
00:17:33,843 --> 00:17:35,276
Can I shower?
343
00:17:35,278 --> 00:17:38,582
[Cheri] No, we don't have time for that.
344
00:17:39,781 --> 00:17:41,350
Come on, get going.
345
00:17:42,785 --> 00:17:43,584
Please, honey?
346
00:17:43,586 --> 00:17:45,786
- Yes, stop talking.
- All right.
347
00:17:45,788 --> 00:17:48,288
(laughs) You don't have to be like that.
348
00:17:48,290 --> 00:17:49,623
No, whenever you have crazy news, I like...
349
00:17:49,625 --> 00:17:52,660
No, no, it's really, it's good crazy news.
350
00:17:52,662 --> 00:17:54,961
But it's gonna be like really hard.
351
00:17:54,963 --> 00:17:57,733
I'm running for Vice President.
352
00:18:00,269 --> 00:18:01,335
(laughs)
353
00:18:01,337 --> 00:18:04,404
I thought for sure when
Jill first called me...
354
00:18:04,406 --> 00:18:05,373
Who's Jill?
355
00:18:05,375 --> 00:18:07,040
Jill Stein, she's from the Green Party.
356
00:18:07,042 --> 00:18:08,409
And...
357
00:18:08,411 --> 00:18:09,043
Wait.
358
00:18:09,045 --> 00:18:10,244
I'm totally serious.
359
00:18:10,246 --> 00:18:10,878
You're running for Vice
President of the United States?
360
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:11,946
[Cheri] I'm running for
361
00:18:11,948 --> 00:18:14,282
Vice President of the
United States of America.
362
00:18:14,284 --> 00:18:17,852
Massive amounts of more
speaking engagements.
363
00:18:17,854 --> 00:18:20,688
It means much more problems
364
00:18:20,690 --> 00:18:23,923
with political police in my life.
365
00:18:23,925 --> 00:18:24,924
- Yeah.
- It means problems
366
00:18:24,926 --> 00:18:27,730
with the IRS, the CIA, the FBI.
367
00:18:29,065 --> 00:18:30,765
Great.
368
00:18:30,767 --> 00:18:32,299
Maybe you can get me a job?
369
00:18:32,301 --> 00:18:33,334
[Cheri] Hmm. A job?
370
00:18:33,336 --> 00:18:35,803
That's a different story. (laughs)
371
00:18:35,805 --> 00:18:37,037
[Mark] Well, I need a fucking job.
372
00:18:37,039 --> 00:18:39,840
Honey, everybody needs a job.
373
00:18:39,842 --> 00:18:41,374
In your neighborhood here,
374
00:18:41,376 --> 00:18:44,879
the number one source of income is welfare.
375
00:18:44,881 --> 00:18:47,480
The second number one
source of income is drugs.
376
00:18:47,482 --> 00:18:49,653
Nobody's got a job, honey.
377
00:18:52,020 --> 00:18:53,653
Guess who's back?
378
00:18:53,655 --> 00:18:55,323
[Mark] Hey.
379
00:18:55,325 --> 00:18:56,757
Hi.
380
00:18:56,759 --> 00:18:58,025
[Cheri] Long time no see.
381
00:18:58,027 --> 00:18:58,825
Mark!
382
00:18:58,827 --> 00:19:00,995
[Mark] How you doing?
383
00:19:00,997 --> 00:19:01,929
[Woman] Good to see you.
384
00:19:01,931 --> 00:19:02,763
Welcome back home.
385
00:19:02,765 --> 00:19:03,596
Thank you so much.
386
00:19:03,598 --> 00:19:04,565
It's great to be home.
387
00:19:04,567 --> 00:19:06,467
[Cheri] She's been so good to Guillermo.
388
00:19:06,469 --> 00:19:07,168
Yeah, you have?
389
00:19:07,170 --> 00:19:08,401
I thought you were locked up.
390
00:19:08,403 --> 00:19:09,903
[Cheri] Do you remember my son?
391
00:19:09,905 --> 00:19:11,805
- [Man] Is this your son? - Yeah,
they both home. - How you doing, man?
392
00:19:11,807 --> 00:19:12,972
What's up? Good to see you, man.
393
00:19:12,974 --> 00:19:14,441
- Okay, congratulations.
- They both home.
394
00:19:14,443 --> 00:19:15,110
[Mark] Thank you.
395
00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:16,009
How much time did you do?
396
00:19:16,011 --> 00:19:17,344
Well, I did 18 years.
397
00:19:17,346 --> 00:19:17,978
18 years?
398
00:19:17,980 --> 00:19:19,013
Yeah.
399
00:19:19,015 --> 00:19:20,081
Mmm hmm.
400
00:19:20,083 --> 00:19:20,948
When you're dealing with
addiction and issues,
401
00:19:20,950 --> 00:19:21,782
Mmm hmm.
402
00:19:21,784 --> 00:19:23,383
it's like a double bubble butt.
403
00:19:23,385 --> 00:19:26,019
Both my parents died from addiction.
404
00:19:26,021 --> 00:19:28,689
They both OD'd and died.
405
00:19:28,691 --> 00:19:29,690
Yeah.
406
00:19:29,692 --> 00:19:32,826
My mom had three other
guys OD and die on her.
407
00:19:32,828 --> 00:19:36,430
It took me in bad places, losing jobs,
408
00:19:36,432 --> 00:19:39,767
getting locked up, being homeless.
409
00:19:39,769 --> 00:19:42,803
And the crazy thing is,
I kept going back for it
410
00:19:42,805 --> 00:19:46,977
knowing the consequences that
was coming for it, you know?
411
00:19:48,044 --> 00:19:49,646
I OD'd eight times.
412
00:19:50,712 --> 00:19:53,080
I still went right back for it.
413
00:19:53,082 --> 00:19:53,913
I started using drugs
414
00:19:53,915 --> 00:19:56,816
at the age of 16 years old, you know.
415
00:19:56,818 --> 00:19:58,020
And I'm 54 today.
416
00:19:59,255 --> 00:20:03,393
But I came in because my life
was completely unmanageable.
417
00:20:04,126 --> 00:20:06,760
I didn't hurt anybody outside of my family.
418
00:20:06,762 --> 00:20:09,130
I always hurt my family, you know.
419
00:20:09,132 --> 00:20:10,930
I was stealing from my family.
420
00:20:10,932 --> 00:20:13,767
So you can't find employment
because you got felonies?
421
00:20:13,769 --> 00:20:15,035
Yeah I got a few felonies.
422
00:20:15,037 --> 00:20:16,903
[Cheri] Mmm hmm.
423
00:20:16,905 --> 00:20:18,939
Like I came from a suburban area.
424
00:20:18,941 --> 00:20:19,806
[Cheri] Mmm hmm.
425
00:20:19,808 --> 00:20:21,642
They look at me so different now.
426
00:20:21,644 --> 00:20:22,276
Mmm hmm.
427
00:20:22,278 --> 00:20:23,744
Like I'm a piece of gum
428
00:20:23,746 --> 00:20:26,713
stuck under the table type, you know?
429
00:20:26,715 --> 00:20:28,481
Well, I've seen you over the weeks,
430
00:20:28,483 --> 00:20:30,785
and you look like you're
really progressing.
431
00:20:30,787 --> 00:20:31,619
Thank you.
432
00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:32,788
The shy guy?
433
00:20:33,990 --> 00:20:35,422
Um, my name Lloyd.
434
00:20:35,424 --> 00:20:37,024
- Oh, God.
- Recovery name is Lloyd.
435
00:20:37,026 --> 00:20:38,625
[Group] Hey, Lloyd.
436
00:20:38,627 --> 00:20:40,094
You know, and I'm in this process.
437
00:20:40,096 --> 00:20:41,996
You know, I'm from Baltimore.
438
00:20:41,998 --> 00:20:42,999
And me too,
439
00:20:45,134 --> 00:20:49,005
like in and out of prison
and stuff like that.
440
00:20:51,207 --> 00:20:54,076
You know, I had 10 years before.
441
00:20:55,076 --> 00:20:59,449
But I didn't use the tools
that I know now to stay clean.
442
00:21:03,019 --> 00:21:07,156
It's a struggle when you
come home from prison.
443
00:21:07,957 --> 00:21:09,722
And doing a lot of time.
444
00:21:09,724 --> 00:21:11,892
It's so hard to adapt before you...
445
00:21:11,894 --> 00:21:12,927
[Cheri] How much time did you do?
446
00:21:12,929 --> 00:21:16,564
Altogether I did, like,
19 years all, total.
447
00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:18,164
And you're only 19, right?
448
00:21:18,166 --> 00:21:19,232
Heh.
449
00:21:19,234 --> 00:21:21,035
Politicians give you
this great song and dance
450
00:21:21,037 --> 00:21:22,937
in front of the cameras.
451
00:21:22,939 --> 00:21:24,238
When the cameras go off,
452
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,105
you're right back in the same reality.
453
00:21:26,107 --> 00:21:28,709
In Pennsylvania, they
spent more money on prisons
454
00:21:28,711 --> 00:21:30,611
than they did on schools.
455
00:21:30,613 --> 00:21:32,516
In your short 86 years,
456
00:21:33,182 --> 00:21:35,716
what would you say are some of the magic
457
00:21:35,718 --> 00:21:38,786
to trying to exist in this war zone?
458
00:21:38,788 --> 00:21:41,055
Well, to be alive is to be aware, they say.
459
00:21:41,057 --> 00:21:42,623
[Man] Mmm hmm.
460
00:21:42,625 --> 00:21:43,724
And...
461
00:21:43,726 --> 00:21:46,526
So you don't think there's
a lot of aware people?
462
00:21:46,528 --> 00:21:48,128
I think that's very true.
463
00:21:48,130 --> 00:21:49,328
Mmm.
464
00:21:49,330 --> 00:21:50,965
[Grey Haired Woman] Basic
to addiction is unawareness
465
00:21:50,967 --> 00:21:52,600
of what life is all about.
466
00:21:52,602 --> 00:21:53,700
[Cheri] So why...
467
00:21:53,702 --> 00:21:56,170
I learned a lot about
recovery when I was in jail.
468
00:21:56,172 --> 00:22:00,544
Because everybody in the jail
cell with me was an addict.
469
00:22:01,143 --> 00:22:02,942
And they were always talking about
470
00:22:02,944 --> 00:22:05,513
what they were gonna do as
soon as they got out of there.
471
00:22:05,515 --> 00:22:07,981
And would start their
whole cycle over again,
472
00:22:07,983 --> 00:22:08,949
which is going to bring them
473
00:22:08,951 --> 00:22:10,784
right back where they were then.
474
00:22:10,786 --> 00:22:12,719
You got to have a strong mind.
475
00:22:12,721 --> 00:22:16,893
And I was set on getting
clean and staying clean.
476
00:22:18,124 --> 00:22:21,096
I now have six years, nine
months and four days clean.
477
00:22:21,663 --> 00:22:22,596
[Man] Congratulations.
478
00:22:22,598 --> 00:22:26,135
God works in mysterious ways, you know?
479
00:22:28,003 --> 00:22:30,606
It's a good feeling being here.
480
00:22:33,875 --> 00:22:35,042
Who brought us all together?
481
00:22:35,044 --> 00:22:37,277
[Group] God grant me the serenity
482
00:22:37,279 --> 00:22:40,146
to accept the things I cannot change,
483
00:22:40,148 --> 00:22:42,549
the courage to change the things I can,
484
00:22:42,551 --> 00:22:44,718
and the wisdom to know the difference.
485
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,287
God's will, not ours be done.
486
00:22:47,289 --> 00:22:49,256
- What's up, man? - What's
up my dude? - What's up, Hec?
487
00:22:49,258 --> 00:22:51,225
- How you doing, man?
- Good, man, I'm doing good. How you doing?
488
00:22:51,227 --> 00:22:53,626
- I'm good, man, good to see you.
- Good to see you, too, man.
489
00:22:53,628 --> 00:22:56,029
- Yeah, man. - What do you
know? - Yeah, been a minute.
490
00:22:56,031 --> 00:22:57,765
So how long you gonna be in town?
491
00:22:57,767 --> 00:22:59,566
I'm here, man, I'm back now, yeah.
492
00:22:59,568 --> 00:23:00,934
Assad!
493
00:23:00,936 --> 00:23:01,803
This is my son, Mark.
494
00:23:01,805 --> 00:23:03,136
Mark, I've heard so much about you.
495
00:23:03,138 --> 00:23:04,604
Yeah, hey man, nice to meet you.
496
00:23:04,606 --> 00:23:05,706
It's nice to meet you, too.
497
00:23:05,708 --> 00:23:07,074
Yeah, thanks for having us.
498
00:23:07,076 --> 00:23:08,142
He just came home from prison.
499
00:23:08,144 --> 00:23:09,043
I know.
500
00:23:09,045 --> 00:23:11,045
How's it been to be back in real life?
501
00:23:11,047 --> 00:23:12,211
It feels good, man, feels really good.
502
00:23:12,213 --> 00:23:13,146
The yard is just bigger.
503
00:23:13,148 --> 00:23:13,980
Watch yourself, though.
504
00:23:13,982 --> 00:23:15,015
Yeah, that's true.
505
00:23:15,017 --> 00:23:16,749
I spent half my life there,
506
00:23:16,751 --> 00:23:19,053
until I decided, you know what?
507
00:23:19,055 --> 00:23:21,354
Nothing I do is worth that.
508
00:23:21,356 --> 00:23:22,590
[Mark] Mmm hmm.
509
00:23:22,592 --> 00:23:23,958
Nothing.
510
00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:25,124
You know, people always use the excuse,
511
00:23:25,126 --> 00:23:26,160
"Well, I have my family.
512
00:23:26,162 --> 00:23:27,861
"Who's feeding them
while you're in the box?"
513
00:23:27,863 --> 00:23:29,596
Yeah.
- [Man] And that's what you got to do.
514
00:23:29,598 --> 00:23:31,297
Because the system wants you to go back.
515
00:23:31,299 --> 00:23:32,165
Mmm hmm.
516
00:23:32,167 --> 00:23:35,137
They've already got a bed waiting.
517
00:23:36,238 --> 00:23:38,037
You know I don't know shit about cars.
518
00:23:38,039 --> 00:23:39,974
But, I mean, I can clean up.
519
00:23:39,976 --> 00:23:42,209
I can organize tools.
520
00:23:42,211 --> 00:23:44,914
I can be your maid, anything.
521
00:23:48,250 --> 00:23:52,622
[Woman In Yellow] So I
heard you was down with Mo.
522
00:23:53,021 --> 00:23:54,822
Yeah.
523
00:23:54,824 --> 00:23:56,923
Okay, how is everything?
524
00:23:56,925 --> 00:23:58,992
He's doing all right, you know.
525
00:23:58,994 --> 00:24:00,061
Keeping his head up.
526
00:24:00,063 --> 00:24:01,128
Me and my mom threw
something on his commissary
527
00:24:01,130 --> 00:24:03,663
before we took off.
528
00:24:03,665 --> 00:24:05,766
You know how hard it is for him
529
00:24:05,768 --> 00:24:09,873
to try to find work out
here with his record now.
530
00:24:11,207 --> 00:24:15,579
And I know this must be
like, hard, knowing that,
531
00:24:15,877 --> 00:24:19,348
you know, Mo's still
locked up and he's out.
532
00:24:22,218 --> 00:24:24,317
And I know now too, with, you know,
533
00:24:24,319 --> 00:24:28,692
the passing of your mom,
trying to keep it all together.
534
00:24:35,230 --> 00:24:36,430
I don't know how you do it.
535
00:24:36,432 --> 00:24:38,832
Well, you got to keep your
head above water, you know?
536
00:24:38,834 --> 00:24:41,101
You got to keep surviving, you know?
537
00:24:41,103 --> 00:24:42,402
That's all to it.
538
00:24:42,404 --> 00:24:45,139
Life goes on, so you must continue.
539
00:24:45,141 --> 00:24:45,972
[Cheri] Yeah.
540
00:24:45,974 --> 00:24:49,209
Anything at all that you want us to
541
00:24:49,211 --> 00:24:50,811
- do for you.
- Yeah, yeah.
542
00:24:50,813 --> 00:24:51,644
I love you.
543
00:24:51,646 --> 00:24:53,279
[Woman In Yellow] I love you, too.
544
00:24:53,281 --> 00:24:54,782
Always care about you guys.
545
00:24:54,784 --> 00:24:56,850
So, you know, I mean loaning helping hand
546
00:24:56,852 --> 00:24:58,922
is always good, you know?
547
00:24:59,954 --> 00:25:00,789
So, mmm.
548
00:25:02,991 --> 00:25:05,324
I'll try to send him some more money.
549
00:25:05,326 --> 00:25:07,094
It's okay.
550
00:25:07,096 --> 00:25:07,928
You know?
551
00:25:07,930 --> 00:25:09,065
We all try hard.
552
00:25:12,034 --> 00:25:13,834
To look out for one another, you know?
553
00:25:13,836 --> 00:25:15,869
That's what it is all about.
554
00:25:15,871 --> 00:25:17,770
Looking out for one another.
555
00:25:17,772 --> 00:25:20,239
What about if you come at seven a.m. sharp
556
00:25:20,241 --> 00:25:22,142
and get started?
557
00:25:22,144 --> 00:25:23,009
[Cheri] She don't play.
558
00:25:23,011 --> 00:25:25,045
If you're not here at seven o'clock,
559
00:25:25,047 --> 00:25:27,250
you ain't gonna keep the job.
560
00:25:29,751 --> 00:25:32,318
Hey Mom, I'm gonna walk back.
561
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:35,389
Got to get a phone and
a couple other things.
562
00:25:35,391 --> 00:25:37,024
You have more money?
563
00:25:37,026 --> 00:25:37,990
Yeah.
564
00:25:37,992 --> 00:25:39,061
From where?
565
00:25:40,462 --> 00:25:41,297
Antoine.
566
00:25:45,101 --> 00:25:46,400
It's cool, it's fine.
567
00:25:46,402 --> 00:25:49,169
You got nothing to worry about.
568
00:25:49,171 --> 00:25:51,371
Please don't be stupid.
569
00:25:51,373 --> 00:25:52,238
I won't.
570
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:53,076
I'm not.
571
00:26:05,019 --> 00:26:06,186
[Man On Phone] Who's this?
572
00:26:06,188 --> 00:26:07,153
[Mark] Who do you think, man?
573
00:26:07,155 --> 00:26:09,155
[Man On Phone] Holy shit, what up, bud?
574
00:26:09,157 --> 00:26:09,957
(Mark laughs)
575
00:26:09,959 --> 00:26:11,324
I can't believe they let you out.
576
00:26:11,326 --> 00:26:12,860
[Mark] Yeah, save this number.
577
00:26:12,862 --> 00:26:13,927
[Man On Phone] Okay, sick, man.
578
00:26:13,929 --> 00:26:15,062
Welcome home, man.
579
00:26:15,064 --> 00:26:15,763
How you feeling?
580
00:26:15,765 --> 00:26:17,363
Freezing my ass off right now.
581
00:26:17,365 --> 00:26:20,133
But other than that, man, I'm happy.
582
00:26:20,135 --> 00:26:21,134
[Man On Phone] Yeah, yeah.
583
00:26:21,136 --> 00:26:24,740
Yeah, so what's this fucking thing tonight?
584
00:26:49,164 --> 00:26:51,267
(sighs)
585
00:26:57,405 --> 00:26:58,474
What is it?
586
00:26:59,375 --> 00:27:01,240
It's your name, Little G.
587
00:27:01,242 --> 00:27:03,844
My name's Guillermo, but close enough.
588
00:27:03,846 --> 00:27:05,179
(laughs) Are you serious?
589
00:27:05,181 --> 00:27:08,282
Dude, I just got your name tattooed on me.
590
00:27:08,284 --> 00:27:10,116
Good job.
591
00:27:10,118 --> 00:27:12,221
Anyway, check this out.
592
00:27:14,490 --> 00:27:18,091
Now, I know you said how
much you want to make movies.
593
00:27:18,093 --> 00:27:19,125
Mmm hmm.
594
00:27:19,127 --> 00:27:19,962
So...
595
00:27:21,963 --> 00:27:23,430
check it out.
596
00:27:23,432 --> 00:27:26,336
Figured you could start right away.
597
00:27:27,435 --> 00:27:31,073
Yeah, it's one of those new like HD ones.
598
00:27:41,083 --> 00:27:42,085
You like it?
599
00:27:46,555 --> 00:27:49,222
[Guillermo] What you doing?
600
00:27:49,224 --> 00:27:50,958
For this freaking welcome home party
601
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:53,392
I'm trying to decide
between these three t-shirts.
602
00:27:53,394 --> 00:27:55,094
I got pink one.
603
00:27:55,096 --> 00:27:56,932
[Guillermo] Mmm hmm.
604
00:27:59,101 --> 00:28:00,100
Wolf one.
605
00:28:00,102 --> 00:28:01,805
[Guillermo] Mmm.
606
00:28:03,137 --> 00:28:06,573
Or I'm 2 Blessed To Be Stressed.
607
00:28:06,575 --> 00:28:08,074
[Guillermo] All right,
I think it's definitely
608
00:28:08,076 --> 00:28:10,043
between the wolf and the pink.
609
00:28:10,045 --> 00:28:12,148
Oh, and what about...
610
00:28:14,916 --> 00:28:17,153
I'm wearing these bad boys.
611
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:19,186
What do you think?
612
00:28:19,188 --> 00:28:20,219
[Guillermo] I think you're crazy,
613
00:28:20,221 --> 00:28:21,388
but you should totally do it.
614
00:28:21,390 --> 00:28:22,225
My man.
615
00:28:23,358 --> 00:28:26,526
(sighs) Fuck.
616
00:28:26,528 --> 00:28:30,900
This is like you're dropping
me off at fucking prom,
617
00:28:31,232 --> 00:28:33,569
except I never went to prom.
618
00:28:46,248 --> 00:28:49,048
(group all talks at once)
619
00:28:49,050 --> 00:28:49,682
[Man] Welcome home!
620
00:28:49,684 --> 00:28:51,317
Thank you.
621
00:28:51,319 --> 00:28:52,353
- [Long Haired Man] Welcome back. This is Mark.
- Nice to finally meet you.
622
00:28:52,355 --> 00:28:54,287
- Yeah, right? - Nice
to meet you, too. - Yeah.
623
00:28:54,289 --> 00:28:55,122
- Pleasure.
- Bro.
624
00:28:55,124 --> 00:28:56,189
What's up, homey?
625
00:28:56,191 --> 00:28:57,391
- Hey man.
- Good to see you, too.
626
00:28:57,393 --> 00:28:58,324
(woman laughs)
627
00:28:58,326 --> 00:29:00,563
Who got me the balloons?
628
00:29:01,963 --> 00:29:03,529
Neighborhood's changing
like crazy, you know?
629
00:29:03,531 --> 00:29:05,032
Condos all through the hood.
630
00:29:05,034 --> 00:29:06,199
Construction every block.
631
00:29:06,201 --> 00:29:07,366
[Elderly Man] Yeah, and it's all ugly.
632
00:29:07,368 --> 00:29:08,200
[Man] The Soupery.
633
00:29:08,202 --> 00:29:10,036
There's a Soupery under the El.
634
00:29:10,038 --> 00:29:10,904
[Mark] What's Soupery?
635
00:29:10,906 --> 00:29:11,805
It's a soup spot that's biting off
636
00:29:11,807 --> 00:29:12,773
another soup spot that's a fish tank.
637
00:29:12,775 --> 00:29:15,308
Going to the El is like fancy restaurants.
638
00:29:15,310 --> 00:29:16,343
Across from the El Bar.
639
00:29:16,345 --> 00:29:17,678
It's not a hooker bar anymore.
640
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:21,081
Life was like, it was
very, very, very hard.
641
00:29:21,083 --> 00:29:22,282
That's why I joke around a lot.
642
00:29:22,284 --> 00:29:26,623
'Cause my life has been,
that would be the title, hard.
643
00:29:27,088 --> 00:29:28,455
[Guillermo] Not a good title.
644
00:29:28,457 --> 00:29:31,227
Okay. (laughs)
645
00:29:32,060 --> 00:29:34,196
I was raised by my mom.
646
00:29:35,596 --> 00:29:39,969
And she had a relationship with
a man that was very violent.
647
00:29:42,136 --> 00:29:45,104
And beat the crap out of her
648
00:29:45,106 --> 00:29:48,110
on a daily basis for her whole life.
649
00:29:49,310 --> 00:29:53,148
This bastard wouldn't
just beat my mom, right?
650
00:29:54,148 --> 00:29:57,185
He beat the hell out of all of us.
651
00:29:58,252 --> 00:30:00,988
All my ribs were broken.
652
00:30:00,990 --> 00:30:04,157
Um, you know, other kids
have earliest memories
653
00:30:04,159 --> 00:30:05,257
of birthday cakes.
654
00:30:05,259 --> 00:30:07,160
Mine was the hospital.
655
00:30:07,162 --> 00:30:08,661
- You?
- Yes, to Mark.
656
00:30:08,663 --> 00:30:10,063
Welcome home, Mark.
657
00:30:10,065 --> 00:30:11,131
This one's for you, buddy.
658
00:30:11,133 --> 00:30:14,170
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
659
00:30:18,207 --> 00:30:20,109
Roc, you got a cigarette?
660
00:30:40,729 --> 00:30:42,398
You're really cute.
661
00:30:45,401 --> 00:30:47,470
(sighs)
662
00:30:50,571 --> 00:30:53,008
[Girl] Right back at you.
663
00:31:00,615 --> 00:31:01,550
- Yo.
- Yo.
664
00:31:02,417 --> 00:31:04,084
- What's up?
- What up, man?
665
00:31:04,086 --> 00:31:04,817
You good?
666
00:31:04,819 --> 00:31:06,420
Yeah, man, I'm all right.
667
00:31:06,422 --> 00:31:09,789
Just fucking bugging out a little bit.
668
00:31:09,791 --> 00:31:12,426
It's just a lot at once, you know?
669
00:31:12,428 --> 00:31:14,795
(laughs) I'll bet, man, I'll bet.
670
00:31:14,797 --> 00:31:15,694
(sighs) Fuck.
671
00:31:15,696 --> 00:31:17,197
I feel you.
672
00:31:17,199 --> 00:31:18,065
Yeah.
673
00:31:18,067 --> 00:31:21,101
And just like fucking seeing everybody
674
00:31:21,103 --> 00:31:23,303
just got me thinking about Maddy, man.
675
00:31:23,305 --> 00:31:24,140
Mmm.
676
00:31:26,275 --> 00:31:27,143
Yeah.
677
00:31:28,042 --> 00:31:32,347
(sighs) You, you got her new number?
678
00:31:34,182 --> 00:31:34,815
I do.
679
00:31:34,817 --> 00:31:35,649
You do?
680
00:31:35,651 --> 00:31:36,482
Yeah.
681
00:31:36,484 --> 00:31:37,285
Fuck.
682
00:31:42,523 --> 00:31:44,190
You know she moved.
683
00:31:44,192 --> 00:31:45,225
She did?
684
00:31:45,227 --> 00:31:46,492
Uh huh.
685
00:31:46,494 --> 00:31:47,626
Where is she staying now?
686
00:31:47,628 --> 00:31:49,563
She's up on Lehigh.
687
00:31:49,565 --> 00:31:50,396
On Lehigh?
688
00:31:50,398 --> 00:31:51,498
(laughs) Yeah.
689
00:31:51,500 --> 00:31:53,100
- Really?
- Yeah, it's chill though, you know.
690
00:31:53,102 --> 00:31:53,901
Fuck.
691
00:31:53,903 --> 00:31:56,103
So what have you been up to, dawg?
692
00:31:56,105 --> 00:31:58,604
Oh, you know, was working
in Brooklyn for a bit.
693
00:31:58,606 --> 00:32:00,239
- And...
- Yeah.
694
00:32:00,241 --> 00:32:03,142
get out of town for a
bit, get a couple dollars,
695
00:32:03,144 --> 00:32:03,943
I feel all right.
696
00:32:03,945 --> 00:32:06,680
And then it's just like same shit.
697
00:32:06,682 --> 00:32:07,581
Just nothing.
698
00:32:07,583 --> 00:32:08,748
Just like it never happened, you know?
699
00:32:08,750 --> 00:32:11,351
- Yeah.
- And like try and get a job in North Philly.
700
00:32:11,353 --> 00:32:13,152
You know, I was writing a lot, man.
701
00:32:13,154 --> 00:32:14,187
Writing?
702
00:32:14,189 --> 00:32:15,221
Yeah, when I was away.
703
00:32:15,223 --> 00:32:17,356
I'm as sad as your
angel, as sad as your God.
704
00:32:17,358 --> 00:32:20,293
As sad as the party in shiny fog.
705
00:32:20,295 --> 00:32:22,629
As sad as your money and all of its lies.
706
00:32:22,631 --> 00:32:25,332
As sad as the people when
they fade away and die.
707
00:32:25,334 --> 00:32:28,267
As sad as your hope, as sad as your faith,
708
00:32:28,269 --> 00:32:32,240
as sad as your quotes,
and as sad as this space.
709
00:32:32,607 --> 00:32:33,442
Mmm.
710
00:32:34,542 --> 00:32:36,176
Yo, they probably didn't tell you,
711
00:32:36,178 --> 00:32:39,211
but Justin got strippers
coming, like right now.
712
00:32:39,213 --> 00:32:40,180
- Hi.
- Oh.
713
00:32:40,182 --> 00:32:41,614
- Good evening, ladies.
- They're so sweet.
714
00:32:41,616 --> 00:32:43,283
Oh ho.
715
00:32:43,285 --> 00:32:45,251
- Hello, hi everybody.
- It's that time.
716
00:32:45,253 --> 00:32:46,253
- Hello.
- Goodness gracious.
717
00:32:46,255 --> 00:32:47,586
Well, this is our special guest.
718
00:32:47,588 --> 00:32:48,921
He's been away for a little while.
719
00:32:48,923 --> 00:32:49,488
[Woman] Hi.
720
00:32:49,490 --> 00:32:50,157
Hi, how's it going?
721
00:32:50,159 --> 00:32:51,424
[Woman] Nice to meet you.
722
00:32:51,426 --> 00:32:53,259
- [Mark] Nice to meet you, too.
- [Woman] Are you guys ready?
723
00:32:53,261 --> 00:32:54,297
Yeah.
724
00:32:54,930 --> 00:32:57,564
(hip hop music)
725
00:32:57,566 --> 00:32:58,401
Alright.
726
00:33:01,569 --> 00:33:02,571
Fantastic.
727
00:33:05,339 --> 00:33:09,278
(group laughing and murmuring)
728
00:33:16,817 --> 00:33:17,819
[Mark] Hi.
729
00:33:19,354 --> 00:33:22,859
(music overpowers voices)
730
00:33:41,442 --> 00:33:45,411
When I was 13 years old, actually your age,
731
00:33:45,413 --> 00:33:48,448
I never went back home ever again.
732
00:33:48,450 --> 00:33:51,684
I had to live in nine
different institutions
733
00:33:51,686 --> 00:33:54,156
and foster homes and jails.
734
00:33:55,223 --> 00:33:58,225
So I learned at a very young age
735
00:33:58,227 --> 00:34:02,295
about a lot of stuff that
I shouldn't know about.
736
00:34:02,297 --> 00:34:03,296
You know?
737
00:34:03,298 --> 00:34:07,234
Then I figured out what
this one thing was, sex.
738
00:34:07,236 --> 00:34:08,601
I met this guy.
739
00:34:08,603 --> 00:34:11,271
He was your brother's dad.
740
00:34:11,273 --> 00:34:12,742
I was 15, he was 30.
741
00:34:15,010 --> 00:34:16,075
I know.
742
00:34:16,077 --> 00:34:18,979
It's kind of gross to
think about now. (laughs)
743
00:34:18,981 --> 00:34:21,280
But when I was growing up (laughs)
744
00:34:21,282 --> 00:34:23,416
I thought it was...
745
00:34:23,418 --> 00:34:25,385
Is that even legal age?
746
00:34:25,387 --> 00:34:26,019
No.
747
00:34:26,021 --> 00:34:27,554
Yeah.
748
00:34:27,556 --> 00:34:29,891
He knew how to siphon gas,
749
00:34:31,994 --> 00:34:34,427
do a whole host of other kinds of things.
750
00:34:34,429 --> 00:34:38,498
And then I found out that he
had a serious heroin addiction,
751
00:34:38,500 --> 00:34:42,534
and I didn't know anything
about addictions then.
752
00:34:42,536 --> 00:34:45,207
(hip hop music)
753
00:34:48,010 --> 00:34:49,041
Hey.
754
00:34:49,043 --> 00:34:49,876
[Woman] Hey.
755
00:34:49,878 --> 00:34:50,510
[Mark] Oh.
756
00:34:50,512 --> 00:34:51,344
You in here by yourself?
757
00:34:51,346 --> 00:34:52,479
Yeah, eating some chips. (laughs)
758
00:34:52,481 --> 00:34:54,613
[Woman] Well, you know this
party is for you, right?
759
00:34:54,615 --> 00:34:56,316
We're here to entertain you.
760
00:34:56,318 --> 00:34:57,251
Mmm.
761
00:34:57,253 --> 00:35:01,324
(laughs) Would you like to go upstairs?
762
00:35:07,963 --> 00:35:10,333
(laughs)
763
00:35:18,507 --> 00:35:20,675
(sighs)
764
00:35:21,643 --> 00:35:22,474
So what do I do?
765
00:35:22,476 --> 00:35:24,246
- Lay back.
- Okay.
766
00:35:31,820 --> 00:35:33,823
(sighs)
767
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:47,499
(woman panting)
768
00:35:47,501 --> 00:35:48,971
[Mark] I love you.
769
00:35:53,641 --> 00:35:54,575
It's just reminding me
770
00:35:54,577 --> 00:35:57,880
of like how fucking broken my heart is.
771
00:36:00,748 --> 00:36:01,947
Who broke your heart?
772
00:36:01,949 --> 00:36:02,949
Oh, it's a long story.
773
00:36:02,951 --> 00:36:06,755
It's just, I don't even,
this isn't appropriate.
774
00:36:08,456 --> 00:36:11,326
I had this girl that I was with.
775
00:36:14,028 --> 00:36:15,063
And...
776
00:36:19,034 --> 00:36:23,369
she had a kid with some
other dude when I was away.
777
00:36:23,371 --> 00:36:24,436
Wow.
778
00:36:24,438 --> 00:36:26,106
Yeah.
779
00:36:26,108 --> 00:36:27,539
I'm sorry, I, is this...
780
00:36:27,541 --> 00:36:29,108
Are you still in love?
781
00:36:29,110 --> 00:36:29,943
I don't know.
782
00:36:29,945 --> 00:36:31,077
You don't know?
783
00:36:31,079 --> 00:36:32,512
No, I'm,
784
00:36:32,514 --> 00:36:34,079
I just got her number like out front.
785
00:36:34,081 --> 00:36:36,583
My friend Tim gave me her new number and...
786
00:36:36,585 --> 00:36:39,552
Well, you should give her a call.
787
00:36:39,554 --> 00:36:43,055
That's what I was thinking, yeah.
788
00:36:43,057 --> 00:36:44,124
All right, thank you.
789
00:36:44,126 --> 00:36:45,724
You're welcome.
790
00:36:45,726 --> 00:36:47,659
(hip hop music)
791
00:36:47,661 --> 00:36:50,829
(group laughing)
792
00:36:50,831 --> 00:36:52,030
[Group] Oh!
793
00:36:52,032 --> 00:36:54,767
One of the most dramatic
horrible memories that I have
794
00:36:54,769 --> 00:36:56,338
is that Mark's dad,
795
00:36:59,007 --> 00:37:02,441
he had a couple baseball bats.
796
00:37:02,443 --> 00:37:05,445
He told me that he was
coming over to kill me.
797
00:37:05,447 --> 00:37:07,947
So he brought over a couple.
798
00:37:07,949 --> 00:37:10,985
He was like in a blackout on dope.
799
00:37:12,686 --> 00:37:16,858
And at the time, he was like
200 some pounds, huge guy.
800
00:37:17,125 --> 00:37:18,925
And I had your brother.
801
00:37:18,927 --> 00:37:20,760
And we just like hid in the basement.
802
00:37:20,762 --> 00:37:23,563
And the door was being knocked down.
803
00:37:23,565 --> 00:37:25,999
And I knew that if he came in the house,
804
00:37:26,001 --> 00:37:27,599
me and your brother would die.
805
00:37:27,601 --> 00:37:31,470
So I called the Minneapolis
Police Department,
806
00:37:31,472 --> 00:37:34,072
And they sent out like six squad cars.
807
00:37:34,074 --> 00:37:35,074
But sometimes when people
808
00:37:35,076 --> 00:37:38,914
are really, really high
on alcohol and drugs,
809
00:37:39,748 --> 00:37:41,780
they get this like super strength.
810
00:37:41,782 --> 00:37:44,016
So they had like the entire police force
811
00:37:44,018 --> 00:37:48,022
like trying to restrain him
and get him away from us.
812
00:37:49,490 --> 00:37:53,661
And that was only one of like
a million other incidents.
813
00:37:55,764 --> 00:37:59,068
And that's the story of me and Mark's dad.
814
00:38:27,996 --> 00:38:30,032
(sighs)
815
00:38:41,076 --> 00:38:42,110
Maddy?
816
00:38:43,177 --> 00:38:45,013
Hey, hi, it's Mark.
817
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:51,554
Okay.
818
00:38:56,090 --> 00:38:58,092
(sighs)
819
00:39:07,235 --> 00:39:09,969
(knocking at door)
820
00:39:09,971 --> 00:39:11,871
(baby babbling)
821
00:39:11,873 --> 00:39:14,706
[Maddy] Yes, who is that?
822
00:39:14,708 --> 00:39:17,110
Oh, it's cold out there.
823
00:39:17,112 --> 00:39:18,110
It's good to see you.
824
00:39:18,112 --> 00:39:19,646
Yeah, you too.
825
00:39:19,648 --> 00:39:20,546
Thanks for seeing me.
826
00:39:20,548 --> 00:39:21,179
Yeah.
827
00:39:21,181 --> 00:39:22,981
Oh, this is...
828
00:39:22,983 --> 00:39:23,983
Oh yeah, we got a...
829
00:39:23,985 --> 00:39:24,950
really amazing place.
830
00:39:24,952 --> 00:39:29,023
(laughs) Thanks, we got a lot going on.
831
00:39:29,590 --> 00:39:30,222
(laughs)
832
00:39:30,224 --> 00:39:31,023
I'm doing good.
833
00:39:31,025 --> 00:39:33,126
I'm staying with my mom right now.
834
00:39:33,128 --> 00:39:34,159
Cool.
835
00:39:34,161 --> 00:39:34,994
And my brother.
836
00:39:34,996 --> 00:39:35,994
Yeah?
837
00:39:35,996 --> 00:39:37,031
And...
838
00:39:40,034 --> 00:39:44,202
just trying to find my way again, you know?
839
00:39:44,204 --> 00:39:45,039
Umm hmm.
840
00:39:47,074 --> 00:39:48,007
But things are good.
841
00:39:48,009 --> 00:39:49,008
I'm happy to be home.
842
00:39:49,010 --> 00:39:51,077
Yeah, I bet.
843
00:39:51,079 --> 00:39:51,978
Really happy to see you.
844
00:39:51,980 --> 00:39:54,213
Thanks for seeing me.
845
00:39:54,215 --> 00:39:55,048
Yeah.
846
00:39:55,050 --> 00:39:56,018
You know?
847
00:39:57,152 --> 00:40:01,190
I'm gonna to put him upstairs,
just real quick, okay?
848
00:40:14,768 --> 00:40:17,071
(baby crying)
849
00:40:35,856 --> 00:40:38,124
(sighs)
850
00:40:38,126 --> 00:40:39,157
So.
851
00:40:39,159 --> 00:40:41,195
(laughs)
852
00:40:45,099 --> 00:40:47,036
I was really selfish.
853
00:40:49,036 --> 00:40:51,637
I was acting like a child.
854
00:40:51,639 --> 00:40:55,141
You know, I wish I was
the guy I am now back then.
855
00:40:55,143 --> 00:40:58,177
And I'm really sorry that I hurt you.
856
00:40:58,179 --> 00:41:02,117
And I thought about
you, you know, every day.
857
00:41:04,052 --> 00:41:06,119
Yeah, I thought about you, too.
858
00:41:06,121 --> 00:41:07,155
And...
859
00:41:12,059 --> 00:41:12,894
(sighs)
860
00:41:14,663 --> 00:41:17,065
Ah. (sighs)
861
00:41:20,434 --> 00:41:21,269
Um.
862
00:41:24,139 --> 00:41:26,075
You're gonna be okay.
863
00:41:32,947 --> 00:41:34,950
(sighs)
864
00:41:37,751 --> 00:41:40,322
Okay. (laughs)
865
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,631
Don't, like don't bullshit me.
866
00:41:50,931 --> 00:41:52,097
I'm not bullshitting you.
867
00:41:52,099 --> 00:41:54,002
Yeah, sure, you know.
868
00:41:55,003 --> 00:41:56,101
I'm totally fucking fine.
869
00:41:56,103 --> 00:41:57,170
I told you, I had a couple beers.
870
00:41:57,172 --> 00:42:01,376
You're fucking nodding
out driving us right now.
871
00:42:02,043 --> 00:42:02,874
Just tell me the truth.
872
00:42:02,876 --> 00:42:04,179
What did you take?
873
00:42:13,054 --> 00:42:16,392
(sighs) Good morning.
874
00:42:19,193 --> 00:42:23,061
(sighs) I was having a bad dream.
875
00:42:23,063 --> 00:42:25,733
[Guillermo] Sounds depressing.
876
00:42:28,202 --> 00:42:30,706
I was falling through space.
877
00:42:33,407 --> 00:42:35,411
And it was really crazy,
878
00:42:38,079 --> 00:42:39,948
because I could feel
879
00:42:42,851 --> 00:42:46,184
like every cell in my entire body...
880
00:42:46,186 --> 00:42:47,056
Cut.
881
00:42:51,226 --> 00:42:53,525
What do you mean, cut?
882
00:42:53,527 --> 00:42:56,998
(bright country music)
883
00:43:21,188 --> 00:43:24,090
Democracy starts today
with opening up the debates
884
00:43:24,092 --> 00:43:26,291
for every single political party
885
00:43:26,293 --> 00:43:28,094
in the United States of America.
886
00:43:28,096 --> 00:43:31,496
(protesters chanting)
887
00:43:31,498 --> 00:43:32,264
[Policeman] Here, we'll help you.
888
00:43:32,266 --> 00:43:33,365
- Thank you.
- Thank you, ma'am.
889
00:43:33,367 --> 00:43:33,999
Thank you, ladies.
890
00:43:34,001 --> 00:43:35,834
Watch the flag, please.
891
00:43:35,836 --> 00:43:38,037
Democracy was taken away from us,
892
00:43:38,039 --> 00:43:42,211
and we were taken by Secret
Service to a secret location.
893
00:43:43,478 --> 00:43:47,849
And we were handcuffed to
metal chairs for eight hours.
894
00:43:52,554 --> 00:43:54,153
Typically is a three-day cycle.
895
00:43:54,155 --> 00:43:55,987
So they spray every three days.
896
00:43:55,989 --> 00:43:58,124
So you get a day where everybody,
897
00:43:58,126 --> 00:44:01,394
just everybody is in a really
good mood, everyone's up.
898
00:44:01,396 --> 00:44:03,061
And then like, three days later,
899
00:44:03,063 --> 00:44:05,398
like everyone's like
really down, like withdrawn.
900
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,833
Like everyone's like crashing
from, like, the drugs.
901
00:44:07,835 --> 00:44:09,601
And then they spray again.
902
00:44:09,603 --> 00:44:10,737
- No fucking way.
- You'll notice.
903
00:44:10,739 --> 00:44:13,072
You'll notice, like everybody's
happy at the same time,
904
00:44:13,074 --> 00:44:14,307
everybody's pissed off at the same time.
905
00:44:14,309 --> 00:44:16,175
Just the vibe of the city,
906
00:44:16,177 --> 00:44:19,347
'cause they're fucking lacing the sky.
907
00:44:28,121 --> 00:44:29,155
Is this right?
908
00:44:29,157 --> 00:44:29,789
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
909
00:44:29,791 --> 00:44:30,990
That's good, that's good.
910
00:44:30,992 --> 00:44:31,827
Alright.
911
00:44:33,228 --> 00:44:34,896
So what I need is...
912
00:44:38,932 --> 00:44:40,501
Come on, faster guys.
913
00:44:45,039 --> 00:44:46,472
Hey, you're only on the first one?
914
00:44:46,474 --> 00:44:47,673
[Worker] Yeah.
915
00:44:47,675 --> 00:44:49,307
Come on, come on, come on,
come on. Fucking move it!
916
00:44:49,309 --> 00:44:51,110
(worker growls)
917
00:44:51,112 --> 00:44:54,983
Here, here, here, here,
go get the next one.
918
00:45:06,226 --> 00:45:07,059
Okay.
919
00:45:07,061 --> 00:45:08,896
Um, hi, I'm Guillermo.
920
00:45:10,097 --> 00:45:13,599
So I recently got
diagnosed with Asperger's,
921
00:45:13,601 --> 00:45:15,269
which is ridiculous.
922
00:45:18,572 --> 00:45:19,505
When people think of autism,
923
00:45:19,507 --> 00:45:20,472
the first thing that comes to their head
924
00:45:20,474 --> 00:45:24,346
is a grown man having a tantrum in public.
925
00:45:25,213 --> 00:45:29,384
It's a little disheartening
to be finally given that,
926
00:45:30,918 --> 00:45:32,318
I don't want to say label.
927
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:34,653
But for lack of a better word, label.
928
00:45:34,655 --> 00:45:37,925
It's going to cause a lot of problems
929
00:45:39,527 --> 00:45:41,193
farther down the road in my life.
930
00:45:41,195 --> 00:45:43,498
I'm already bullied regularly.
931
00:45:48,168 --> 00:45:51,170
I'm told to kill myself a lot.
932
00:45:51,172 --> 00:45:53,139
One time I got beat up to the point
933
00:45:53,141 --> 00:45:55,106
where an ambulance had to pick me up.
934
00:45:55,108 --> 00:45:59,244
And me and my mom are
still paying for that bill.
935
00:45:59,246 --> 00:46:01,213
And I got beat up and
taken by the ambulance
936
00:46:01,215 --> 00:46:04,583
in like 3rd or 4th grade
and I'm in the 7th grade now.
937
00:46:04,585 --> 00:46:07,286
Nowadays I have friends,
so I don't have to sit
938
00:46:07,288 --> 00:46:11,126
next to the garbage cans
during lunch anymore.
939
00:46:12,260 --> 00:46:15,961
A lot of people look at me weird,
940
00:46:15,963 --> 00:46:18,264
tell me I'm not supposed to be there.
941
00:46:18,266 --> 00:46:22,436
Being suicidal and my heavy
depression, it's horrible.
942
00:46:23,204 --> 00:46:24,503
It's horrific.
943
00:46:24,505 --> 00:46:26,671
That's why I want to start
out with a documentary,
944
00:46:26,673 --> 00:46:31,045
to teach and show others about
what happens to me and to,
945
00:46:32,179 --> 00:46:36,349
I'm sure, a lot of kids all over America.
946
00:46:36,351 --> 00:46:37,650
That a lot of people are just...
947
00:46:37,652 --> 00:46:39,385
I had no idea that this shit even goes on.
948
00:46:39,387 --> 00:46:41,686
But, so there's a point in natural labor
949
00:46:41,688 --> 00:46:43,688
where your body is like, you can't do it.
950
00:46:43,690 --> 00:46:47,126
Your mind is like, you're
not, you can't do it.
951
00:46:47,128 --> 00:46:48,760
She was kind of at that
point where she was like,
952
00:46:48,762 --> 00:46:52,197
"I can't do it, I'm not gonna do it,
"I can't, I can't do it, I can't do it."
953
00:46:52,199 --> 00:46:54,032
And we're like, no, you're
doing it, it's happening.
954
00:46:54,034 --> 00:46:55,400
Like the baby is starting to come out.
955
00:46:55,402 --> 00:46:57,369
It's like right at the
very end of the labor.
956
00:46:57,371 --> 00:46:59,438
So she had to like change
her breathing pattern.
957
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:02,173
And the midwife was trying
to explain it to her,
958
00:47:02,175 --> 00:47:04,309
and I could tell she wasn't getting it.
959
00:47:04,311 --> 00:47:08,246
Like she was visibly frustrated
and, like, wasn't doing it.
960
00:47:08,248 --> 00:47:10,081
And they were like,
kept trying to tell her,
961
00:47:10,083 --> 00:47:11,583
and like she wasn't getting it.
962
00:47:11,585 --> 00:47:15,121
And like I saw that, and in that moment,
963
00:47:15,123 --> 00:47:17,655
it was like my instincts
just like kicked in.
964
00:47:17,657 --> 00:47:19,724
And I was like, I'm just
gonna start doing it.
965
00:47:19,726 --> 00:47:21,793
And she like, we locked eyes.
966
00:47:21,795 --> 00:47:23,362
And she just like settled down
967
00:47:23,364 --> 00:47:25,097
and like started mimicking me.
968
00:47:25,099 --> 00:47:27,233
And we were like totally in sync, yo.
969
00:47:27,235 --> 00:47:29,434
And like that was the
point where she was able to,
970
00:47:29,436 --> 00:47:31,137
like, get into the right rhythm.
971
00:47:31,139 --> 00:47:32,804
And then was like properly dilated.
972
00:47:32,806 --> 00:47:35,407
And got through that like little hump.
973
00:47:35,409 --> 00:47:38,276
It was, like I felt like part of that
974
00:47:38,278 --> 00:47:39,345
at that point, you know?
975
00:47:39,347 --> 00:47:40,679
And I felt like we really connected
976
00:47:40,681 --> 00:47:42,148
on some like next level shit.
977
00:47:42,150 --> 00:47:44,682
It was really, it was
fucking beautiful man.
978
00:47:44,684 --> 00:47:46,121
- It was...
- Crazy.
979
00:47:47,487 --> 00:47:48,322
Yeah.
980
00:47:49,190 --> 00:47:52,260
It's really, it's the coolest shit.
981
00:47:53,460 --> 00:47:54,362
Oh, my bad.
982
00:47:55,730 --> 00:47:57,329
I just, I don't get a chance to really like
983
00:47:57,331 --> 00:47:58,463
cut loose anymore.
984
00:47:58,465 --> 00:48:01,266
So I was trying to take
advantage of the cat being away.
985
00:48:01,268 --> 00:48:02,235
No, it's all good, bro.
986
00:48:02,237 --> 00:48:03,769
- It's total...
- And so the mouse could play.
987
00:48:03,771 --> 00:48:06,237
- It's totally okay. - You know what
I mean? But yeah, oh. - It's fine.
988
00:48:06,239 --> 00:48:10,208
(coughs) Oh my God, I love you, dude.
989
00:48:10,210 --> 00:48:11,443
(guys laughing)
990
00:48:11,445 --> 00:48:13,479
I got to step out front,
dude. I feel weird.
991
00:48:13,481 --> 00:48:14,847
Yeah, go ahead, man.
992
00:48:14,849 --> 00:48:15,548
Yeah.
993
00:48:15,550 --> 00:48:16,782
The buzzer doesn't work, though.
994
00:48:16,784 --> 00:48:20,688
So when you want to come back
in just call me or text me.
995
00:48:25,126 --> 00:48:27,358
I have romantic problems.
996
00:48:27,360 --> 00:48:31,630
When you're a nerd who
is very socially awkward.
997
00:48:31,632 --> 00:48:34,400
I do have this one girl
who I really do like
998
00:48:34,402 --> 00:48:37,503
but I don't that's gonna go anywhere
999
00:48:37,505 --> 00:48:39,407
'cause she's a lesbian.
1000
00:48:42,376 --> 00:48:45,376
You know, I've been feeling
a little low recently
1001
00:48:45,378 --> 00:48:49,581
since I've been back, and just readjusting.
1002
00:48:49,583 --> 00:48:52,217
So what I want to do today
1003
00:48:52,219 --> 00:48:54,253
is this loving kindness meditation
1004
00:48:54,255 --> 00:48:56,391
that I'll guide you through.
1005
00:48:58,192 --> 00:48:59,293
Close your eyes.
1006
00:49:00,661 --> 00:49:04,499
And take one deep breath
in through your nose.
1007
00:49:16,710 --> 00:49:18,546
And I want you to say,
1008
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:22,284
may you be free of fear.
1009
00:49:23,784 --> 00:49:25,454
May you be at peace.
1010
00:49:27,387 --> 00:49:28,824
May you be happy.
1011
00:49:30,625 --> 00:49:33,295
I want you to smile at yourself.
1012
00:49:35,396 --> 00:49:39,267
And I want you to tell
yourself, I love you.
1013
00:49:57,684 --> 00:49:58,516
Hey.
1014
00:49:58,518 --> 00:49:59,385
Oh!
1015
00:49:59,387 --> 00:50:00,920
[Mark] Good morning.
1016
00:50:00,922 --> 00:50:01,954
Good morning.
1017
00:50:01,956 --> 00:50:02,954
Thank you, honey.
1018
00:50:02,956 --> 00:50:04,558
You're welcome.
1019
00:50:05,592 --> 00:50:07,161
The least I can do.
1020
00:50:08,663 --> 00:50:10,862
We got coffee, bagels, donuts.
1021
00:50:10,864 --> 00:50:11,930
Wow.
1022
00:50:11,932 --> 00:50:12,965
Yeah.
1023
00:50:12,967 --> 00:50:13,965
The whole works.
1024
00:50:13,967 --> 00:50:15,333
Mmm hmm.
1025
00:50:15,335 --> 00:50:16,302
He's still asleep.
1026
00:50:16,304 --> 00:50:17,235
Well, you know your brother.
1027
00:50:17,237 --> 00:50:18,704
He doesn't like mornings.
1028
00:50:18,706 --> 00:50:20,307
Yeah, no, I know.
1029
00:50:22,275 --> 00:50:26,248
We're gonna take your brother
to see his dad tonight.
1030
00:50:28,215 --> 00:50:31,485
He tells me supposedly that he's clean.
1031
00:50:33,621 --> 00:50:34,623
All right.
1032
00:50:37,224 --> 00:50:38,289
[Man] Hey.
1033
00:50:38,291 --> 00:50:40,258
Can you give me a ride?
1034
00:50:40,260 --> 00:50:40,892
What's up, man?
1035
00:50:40,894 --> 00:50:41,994
What's up, yo?
1036
00:50:41,996 --> 00:50:43,862
- How you been?
- How you doing? I been good, man.
1037
00:50:43,864 --> 00:50:44,697
All right.
1038
00:50:44,699 --> 00:50:45,530
Hi, yo, yo.
1039
00:50:45,532 --> 00:50:46,367
Hi Dad.
1040
00:50:47,735 --> 00:50:48,566
You all right?
1041
00:50:48,568 --> 00:50:49,400
Hey, Cheri.
1042
00:50:49,402 --> 00:50:50,802
Hi.
1043
00:50:50,804 --> 00:50:51,769
How you doing, man?
1044
00:50:51,771 --> 00:50:53,972
All right, cold. (laughs)
1045
00:50:53,974 --> 00:50:55,807
The jail you just got out of...
1046
00:50:55,809 --> 00:50:56,941
Yeah. Yeah so...
1047
00:50:56,943 --> 00:50:59,880
is where Guillermo met his dad.
1048
00:51:00,981 --> 00:51:01,680
Oh, no.
1049
00:51:01,682 --> 00:51:05,316
(speaking in foreign language)
1050
00:51:05,318 --> 00:51:05,954
Yes.
1051
00:51:07,288 --> 00:51:09,722
Oh my God, I had forgotten about that.
1052
00:51:09,724 --> 00:51:11,724
[Cheri] That's where you met him.
1053
00:51:11,726 --> 00:51:12,858
Well, you were a baby, though.
1054
00:51:12,860 --> 00:51:13,691
Yeah.
1055
00:51:13,693 --> 00:51:14,760
I love my son.
1056
00:51:14,762 --> 00:51:16,662
It's fucked up that I saw
you for the first time,
1057
00:51:16,664 --> 00:51:17,832
I was in jail.
1058
00:51:18,699 --> 00:51:20,566
And I wasn't even there when you were born.
1059
00:51:20,568 --> 00:51:21,970
But can't deny you.
1060
00:51:23,503 --> 00:51:24,903
Look at you.
1061
00:51:24,905 --> 00:51:25,704
It's a mirror.
1062
00:51:25,706 --> 00:51:27,505
They had to take his diaper off,
1063
00:51:27,507 --> 00:51:29,307
search his diaper, do all this.
1064
00:51:29,309 --> 00:51:31,476
Yeah, because I had a
crazy charge, you know.
1065
00:51:31,478 --> 00:51:32,311
I was in maximum.
1066
00:51:32,313 --> 00:51:34,012
I had a kidnapping.
1067
00:51:34,014 --> 00:51:37,883
But, tell him about the string yo yo.
1068
00:51:37,885 --> 00:51:38,816
Uh...
1069
00:51:38,818 --> 00:51:41,019
I hadn't seen him in a minute.
1070
00:51:41,021 --> 00:51:42,054
I was on the run.
1071
00:51:42,056 --> 00:51:43,921
So I was like, you know, fucking,
1072
00:51:43,923 --> 00:51:46,458
I had that little string on my wrist.
1073
00:51:46,460 --> 00:51:47,592
And my son saw it.
1074
00:51:47,594 --> 00:51:49,263
So I gave it to him.
1075
00:51:50,597 --> 00:51:52,831
And I can't believe he's still got it.
1076
00:51:52,833 --> 00:51:57,005
Now I got to get you a
real bracelet. (laughs)
1077
00:51:57,505 --> 00:51:58,438
[Cheri] What about your health?
1078
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:00,539
I don't even know how I'm still alive.
1079
00:52:00,541 --> 00:52:02,941
I had endocarditis.
1080
00:52:02,943 --> 00:52:06,077
I was in the hospital for
a month because of that.
1081
00:52:06,079 --> 00:52:08,449
I've OD'd like nine times.
1082
00:52:11,085 --> 00:52:12,483
I'm still here.
1083
00:52:12,485 --> 00:52:14,853
[Cheri] How about your other health stuff?
1084
00:52:14,855 --> 00:52:15,987
Oh.
1085
00:52:15,989 --> 00:52:16,991
The thing.
1086
00:52:17,858 --> 00:52:18,891
The thing.
1087
00:52:18,893 --> 00:52:20,892
That's what your parents
call it, the thing.
1088
00:52:20,894 --> 00:52:21,760
Oh, really?
1089
00:52:21,762 --> 00:52:23,028
Mmm hmm.
1090
00:52:23,030 --> 00:52:26,334
From getting high, from everything,
1091
00:52:26,967 --> 00:52:29,967
I ended up getting Hep C and HIV.
1092
00:52:29,969 --> 00:52:32,804
He found out, and then
he came over to the house
1093
00:52:32,806 --> 00:52:35,009
on Tulip Street high as shit.
1094
00:52:36,409 --> 00:52:38,077
Oh, well, of course.
1095
00:52:38,079 --> 00:52:42,450
Like when you get that fucking
news, what do you expect?
1096
00:52:42,682 --> 00:52:46,117
Like when I found out, I went
crazy for like three days.
1097
00:52:46,119 --> 00:52:49,954
And I was like, might as
well just kill myself now.
1098
00:52:49,956 --> 00:52:51,657
Because I was afraid.
1099
00:52:51,659 --> 00:52:55,430
I was afraid that he
might have it, you know.
1100
00:52:56,931 --> 00:52:59,030
'Cause I didn't know, like, when I got it.
1101
00:52:59,032 --> 00:53:01,867
So I didn't know if I gave it to your mom.
1102
00:53:01,869 --> 00:53:04,436
Like there was so many variables to it.
1103
00:53:04,438 --> 00:53:06,070
- Yeah.
- I thought he was so full of shit.
1104
00:53:06,072 --> 00:53:07,438
I got him in the car.
1105
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:10,108
I didn't care how high he was.
1106
00:53:10,110 --> 00:53:13,679
He was screaming outside
my window all night long.
1107
00:53:13,681 --> 00:53:16,414
What happened to your eye?
1108
00:53:16,416 --> 00:53:20,587
I, you know I ran the streets
for a decade, like Philly.
1109
00:53:21,922 --> 00:53:24,623
And I did a lot of dirt.
1110
00:53:24,625 --> 00:53:28,894
Well, it just happened
that I burned a corner
1111
00:53:28,896 --> 00:53:33,068
for a break, that a breaker
stabbed one of those.
1112
00:53:33,467 --> 00:53:37,639
Well, the dude I robbed, he
got sentenced to a five to 10.
1113
00:53:38,972 --> 00:53:40,206
[Guillermo] Mmm.
1114
00:53:40,208 --> 00:53:44,008
So I don't know how in the
hell, paperwork got fucked up.
1115
00:53:44,010 --> 00:53:45,443
Or I don't know.
1116
00:53:45,445 --> 00:53:46,878
I was walking on the street,
1117
00:53:46,880 --> 00:53:51,083
and the second I turned
around, 'cause I sensed it,
1118
00:53:51,085 --> 00:53:53,184
I just seen the golf club.
1119
00:53:53,186 --> 00:53:56,391
$1,000, or get hit with a golf club.
1120
00:53:57,891 --> 00:54:00,191
So yeah, (laughs) that's
what I told them for.
1121
00:54:00,193 --> 00:54:02,126
That's my dad.
1122
00:54:02,128 --> 00:54:04,095
No, don't, I'm not proud of it, G.
1123
00:54:04,097 --> 00:54:05,197
That's what I'm trying to say.
1124
00:54:05,199 --> 00:54:08,867
All the shit that I've done,
I wish I could tell you.
1125
00:54:08,869 --> 00:54:11,003
I wish I could talk to
you and explain to you
1126
00:54:11,005 --> 00:54:13,104
so you don't have to go through
1127
00:54:13,106 --> 00:54:14,940
all the shit I've been through.
1128
00:54:14,942 --> 00:54:18,811
Literally the first 10 years of your life,
1129
00:54:18,813 --> 00:54:20,979
I wasted 'em, you know?
1130
00:54:20,981 --> 00:54:23,852
Just because I was getting high.
1131
00:54:25,219 --> 00:54:26,784
You hear the train?
1132
00:54:26,786 --> 00:54:28,186
That fucking train, I hate it,
1133
00:54:28,188 --> 00:54:32,559
'cause I literally threw
away my life under that El
1134
00:54:34,594 --> 00:54:36,028
just for a high.
1135
00:54:36,030 --> 00:54:39,030
Anyway, so I'm getting you a skateboard.
1136
00:54:39,032 --> 00:54:39,965
No.
1137
00:54:39,967 --> 00:54:42,034
Yes, you got to get out of the house.
1138
00:54:42,036 --> 00:54:43,101
I get out of the house.
1139
00:54:43,103 --> 00:54:44,735
I just don't enjoy it.
1140
00:54:44,737 --> 00:54:46,804
(laughs)
1141
00:54:46,806 --> 00:54:47,639
Yeah I, no.
1142
00:54:47,641 --> 00:54:48,507
Yeah.
1143
00:54:48,509 --> 00:54:49,575
No.
1144
00:54:49,577 --> 00:54:51,242
I got to see your knees
at least scraped once.
1145
00:54:51,244 --> 00:54:53,479
My knees have been scraped a lot of times.
1146
00:54:53,481 --> 00:54:54,981
Let's play handball.
1147
00:54:54,983 --> 00:54:56,081
- [Guillermo] No, that hurts.
- Let me teach you how to play handball.
1148
00:54:56,083 --> 00:54:57,014
Played it, it hurts.
1149
00:54:57,016 --> 00:54:58,083
No it don't.
1150
00:54:58,085 --> 00:55:01,019
- Yes it does.
- You wear a glove if it hurts.
1151
00:55:01,021 --> 00:55:03,121
I got to do something positive,
1152
00:55:03,123 --> 00:55:05,923
helping my beautiful son grow up.
1153
00:55:05,925 --> 00:55:09,596
But I can see you. (laughs)
1154
00:55:10,864 --> 00:55:11,863
Same hair.
1155
00:55:11,865 --> 00:55:13,965
You'll shape up nice.
1156
00:55:13,967 --> 00:55:14,800
Yeah.
1157
00:55:14,802 --> 00:55:16,133
I still don't see it.
1158
00:55:16,135 --> 00:55:18,003
You don't see it?
1159
00:55:18,005 --> 00:55:19,170
I don't see the resemblance.
1160
00:55:19,172 --> 00:55:20,238
Can you see a resemblance?
1161
00:55:20,240 --> 00:55:20,873
Absolutely.
1162
00:55:20,875 --> 00:55:21,874
Just take the nose out.
1163
00:55:21,876 --> 00:55:25,244
You got the same big
ass smile, big ass lips.
1164
00:55:25,246 --> 00:55:26,079
The hair.
1165
00:55:27,681 --> 00:55:29,947
You're both geniuses.
1166
00:55:29,949 --> 00:55:30,615
Yeah, but...
1167
00:55:30,617 --> 00:55:33,050
You're both full of shit.
1168
00:55:33,052 --> 00:55:36,255
I think I figured out what gives me peace.
1169
00:55:36,257 --> 00:55:37,090
Really?
1170
00:55:38,192 --> 00:55:39,758
What's that?
1171
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:40,662
You guys.
1172
00:55:42,128 --> 00:55:46,030
It's good to know that
at least a few people
1173
00:55:46,032 --> 00:55:48,266
have my best intentions at heart,
1174
00:55:48,268 --> 00:55:51,570
and care about me to the point
1175
00:55:51,572 --> 00:55:55,072
where they only want to bring me joy,
1176
00:55:55,074 --> 00:55:59,047
regardless of what happens
to them or anybody else.
1177
00:56:08,255 --> 00:56:09,921
Hello?
1178
00:56:09,923 --> 00:56:12,124
Come on, time to get up.
1179
00:56:12,126 --> 00:56:13,659
Happy fun day, boys.
1180
00:56:13,661 --> 00:56:14,825
Come on, get up.
1181
00:56:14,827 --> 00:56:15,661
Come on.
1182
00:56:15,663 --> 00:56:16,394
Hurry up.
1183
00:56:16,396 --> 00:56:17,996
We're gonna have a fun day today.
1184
00:56:17,998 --> 00:56:20,068
My name is Cheri Honkala,
1185
00:56:21,568 --> 00:56:24,635
and I'm proud to announce today
1186
00:56:24,637 --> 00:56:28,340
that I am the first
formerly homeless mother
1187
00:56:28,342 --> 00:56:32,713
running for Vice President of
the United States of America.
1188
00:56:34,715 --> 00:56:36,615
I know what it's like
1189
00:56:36,617 --> 00:56:39,083
to sleep on the streets of this country,
1190
00:56:39,085 --> 00:56:41,021
and so did my son Mark.
1191
00:56:42,356 --> 00:56:46,728
We lived together in abandoned
houses, abandoned cars.
1192
00:56:46,994 --> 00:56:49,530
Every night in this country,
1193
00:56:50,230 --> 00:56:54,601
millions of children will
not have a place to call home.
1194
00:56:55,302 --> 00:56:58,869
They, too, will lay down in the streets,
1195
00:56:58,871 --> 00:57:02,042
in the cold each night in our country.
1196
00:57:07,146 --> 00:57:08,650
- Oh, Mark?
- Hmm?
1197
00:57:10,184 --> 00:57:12,150
Do you mind if I get
your help a little later?
1198
00:57:12,152 --> 00:57:15,153
(sirens wail)
1199
00:57:15,155 --> 00:57:17,322
(protesters chanting)
1200
00:57:17,324 --> 00:57:20,391
For those families of this city,
1201
00:57:20,393 --> 00:57:23,362
they take away their voice!
1202
00:57:23,364 --> 00:57:26,034
What the hell is wrong with you?
1203
00:57:27,134 --> 00:57:29,800
[Woman] You got to move back,
son, you got to move back.
1204
00:57:29,802 --> 00:57:31,972
(yelling)
1205
00:57:36,010 --> 00:57:37,943
[Man] people get right with God.
1206
00:57:37,945 --> 00:57:39,711
Do you get high, do you get (mumbles)
1207
00:57:39,713 --> 00:57:40,979
do you get wasted?
1208
00:57:40,981 --> 00:57:42,216
Oh, shame on you!
1209
00:57:43,416 --> 00:57:47,788
But this is our country,
not Trump's country!
1210
00:57:47,987 --> 00:57:50,121
(crowd cheers)
1211
00:57:50,123 --> 00:57:50,956
(dog barks)
1212
00:57:50,958 --> 00:57:52,793
Did you get the dog?
1213
00:57:56,697 --> 00:57:58,896
[Guillermo] Oh, you should
probably take this, then.
1214
00:57:58,898 --> 00:58:01,034
All right, let me get you.
1215
00:58:03,237 --> 00:58:05,871
How are you feeling right now?
1216
00:58:05,873 --> 00:58:09,307
Nervous but overall pretty good.
1217
00:58:09,309 --> 00:58:10,409
Okay.
1218
00:58:10,411 --> 00:58:12,276
That's a good shot.
1219
00:58:12,278 --> 00:58:14,081
I'll go around you.
1220
00:58:15,048 --> 00:58:16,050
There we go.
1221
00:58:19,152 --> 00:58:21,353
Talk to me about anything.
1222
00:58:21,355 --> 00:58:22,356
Pussy, dick.
1223
00:58:24,992 --> 00:58:26,825
Uh, I don't know, whatever.
1224
00:58:26,827 --> 00:58:30,762
Whatever may cross your mind,
you can talk to me about it.
1225
00:58:30,764 --> 00:58:32,264
What's the worst thing you've ever done?
1226
00:58:32,266 --> 00:58:36,168
(laughs) I can't say that on film
1227
00:58:36,170 --> 00:58:40,340
but what I can say is I've
done a lot of bad things.
1228
00:58:40,840 --> 00:58:41,472
Okay.
1229
00:58:41,474 --> 00:58:43,310
Why do you like drugs?
1230
00:58:47,447 --> 00:58:51,385
Because they took me
out of myself for a few.
1231
00:58:54,253 --> 00:58:57,322
Because I didn't have to deal with reality
1232
00:58:57,324 --> 00:59:00,191
at the moment when I'm high.
1233
00:59:00,193 --> 00:59:02,494
At first it was beautiful, you know.
1234
00:59:02,496 --> 00:59:06,130
You could manage, get high
and make your problems go away.
1235
00:59:06,132 --> 00:59:08,068
But then it became work
1236
00:59:11,371 --> 00:59:14,805
because I had to come up with money
1237
00:59:14,807 --> 00:59:18,980
so I wouldn't be dope sick
so it wasn't no fun no more.
1238
00:59:19,179 --> 00:59:22,316
It became actually a job not to be sick.
1239
00:59:24,016 --> 00:59:26,318
So what's it like being a father?
1240
00:59:26,320 --> 00:59:30,324
(laughs) Nice question there.
1241
00:59:32,826 --> 00:59:35,096
Honestly, how does it feel?
1242
00:59:36,230 --> 00:59:40,164
It feels wonderful that you're my son.
1243
00:59:40,166 --> 00:59:41,469
I love you dearly.
1244
00:59:42,402 --> 00:59:46,773
You're 13, and I think I've
missed half of your life
1245
00:59:49,376 --> 00:59:50,608
because of me getting high.
1246
00:59:50,610 --> 00:59:54,882
So the only thing I can say
is that I'm real proud of you.
1247
00:59:56,150 --> 00:59:58,249
I love the fact that you're my son.
1248
00:59:58,251 --> 01:00:01,820
Love the fact that I know you're gonna do
1249
01:00:01,822 --> 01:00:04,990
real good in your life,
because you're real bright.
1250
01:00:04,992 --> 01:00:07,095
The fact that we can talk
1251
01:00:09,163 --> 01:00:11,099
like, you know, people.
1252
01:00:13,934 --> 01:00:16,771
And I don't have to, you know, lie
1253
01:00:19,039 --> 01:00:21,972
or come up with excuses because I'm high
1254
01:00:21,974 --> 01:00:24,077
and I can't come see you.
1255
01:00:25,913 --> 01:00:27,148
Don't get high.
1256
01:00:28,081 --> 01:00:31,550
Instead of getting high, go get some pussy.
1257
01:00:31,552 --> 01:00:34,989
Because that's the best drug there is.
1258
01:00:36,389 --> 01:00:37,222
Okay.
1259
01:00:37,224 --> 01:00:38,226
All right?
1260
01:00:39,393 --> 01:00:40,925
So do I give you a hug?
1261
01:00:40,927 --> 01:00:43,028
(laughs) Come here.
1262
01:00:43,030 --> 01:00:44,165
I love you, G.
1263
01:00:46,967 --> 01:00:48,532
Now say cut.
1264
01:00:48,534 --> 01:00:49,400
Cut.
1265
01:00:49,402 --> 01:00:51,772
(laughs)
1266
01:00:53,306 --> 01:00:56,176
(sighs) Good.
1267
01:01:00,380 --> 01:01:01,345
Like his advice to Guillermo
1268
01:01:01,347 --> 01:01:04,916
was all he needs to do is get some pussy.
1269
01:01:04,918 --> 01:01:05,920
Oh really?
1270
01:01:11,157 --> 01:01:14,325
Why do you have him see him?
1271
01:01:14,327 --> 01:01:16,927
Guillermo's dad is very sick.
1272
01:01:16,929 --> 01:01:20,164
I don't know, he could, you
know, he could die tomorrow.
1273
01:01:20,166 --> 01:01:23,101
At least he will have had some
kind of relationship with him,
1274
01:01:23,103 --> 01:01:26,371
or memory of him, you know? His dad has been
- Yeah, but not like that.
1275
01:01:26,373 --> 01:01:28,240
totally absent all these years.
1276
01:01:28,242 --> 01:01:30,474
Yeah, but that time with him,
1277
01:01:30,476 --> 01:01:34,345
with saying shit like
that to him, is traumatic.
1278
01:01:34,347 --> 01:01:35,447
And it's detrimental.
1279
01:01:35,449 --> 01:01:37,048
Yeah, well, you should
have interjected something.
1280
01:01:37,050 --> 01:01:37,983
You should have said something.
1281
01:01:37,985 --> 01:01:39,650
I'm saying something to you right now.
1282
01:01:39,652 --> 01:01:41,151
All right, is this where we get into
1283
01:01:41,153 --> 01:01:43,021
dissecting me as a mom?
1284
01:01:43,023 --> 01:01:45,557
And this is what you do all the time.
1285
01:01:45,559 --> 01:01:47,161
It's the same shit.
1286
01:01:49,463 --> 01:01:52,998
[Cheri] Neither of you
guys' dads ever did shit.
1287
01:01:53,000 --> 01:01:57,170
- Your dad never gave me one dollar, not one dollar.
- [Mark] But what did you do...
1288
01:01:59,338 --> 01:02:01,005
[Cheri] Who visited you in prison?
1289
01:02:01,007 --> 01:02:01,974
It was me.
1290
01:02:01,976 --> 01:02:03,407
[Mark] But what have you done wrong, Mom?
1291
01:02:03,409 --> 01:02:05,175
I was a teenager mother then.
1292
01:02:05,177 --> 01:02:09,046
The only thing that I knew
how to do was to hustle.
1293
01:02:09,048 --> 01:02:12,016
So I worked for years in different clubs
1294
01:02:12,018 --> 01:02:14,151
trying to figure out how to take that money
1295
01:02:14,153 --> 01:02:15,653
and meet the needs of my kids.
1296
01:02:15,655 --> 01:02:17,521
- Yeah but that was a choice
- Keep my kids alive.
1297
01:02:17,523 --> 01:02:18,690
that you made, you made that choice.
1298
01:02:18,692 --> 01:02:19,523
[Cheri] A choice?
1299
01:02:19,525 --> 01:02:20,157
Ain't no choice.
1300
01:02:20,159 --> 01:02:21,025
It was a fucking choice.
1301
01:02:21,027 --> 01:02:21,927
[Cheri] Yo, listen, don't tell me
1302
01:02:21,929 --> 01:02:23,394
about something you don't know about.
1303
01:02:23,396 --> 01:02:24,329
[Mark] I know about it.
1304
01:02:24,331 --> 01:02:25,262
[Cheri] No you don't. You...
1305
01:02:25,264 --> 01:02:26,231
[Mark] You made a choice.
1306
01:02:26,233 --> 01:02:27,499
You could have went
and done something else.
1307
01:02:27,501 --> 01:02:28,999
- You've never worked in that... No.
- You weren't forced into it.
1308
01:02:29,001 --> 01:02:31,503
- You weren't like sold into the fucking...
- You don't want to hear this.
1309
01:02:31,505 --> 01:02:33,537
You have never worked inside that industry.
1310
01:02:33,539 --> 01:02:35,307
- You could have chose some other job.
- [Cheri] Bullshit!
1311
01:02:35,309 --> 01:02:36,941
I didn't have to come home at night
1312
01:02:36,943 --> 01:02:39,244
and then know what the fuck you were doing.
1313
01:02:39,246 --> 01:02:41,345
- Mark, Mark, Mark.
- As a fucking teenage kid.
1314
01:02:41,347 --> 01:02:42,579
[Cheri] Mark, Mark, Mark.
1315
01:02:42,581 --> 01:02:44,115
Like that shit was inappropriate!
1316
01:02:44,117 --> 01:02:46,050
- Yo.
- That shit fucked me up!
1317
01:02:46,052 --> 01:02:47,552
[Cheri] Ay, yi, yi.
1318
01:02:47,554 --> 01:02:49,621
You never want to talk about the
shit that you did that fucked me up.
1319
01:02:49,623 --> 01:02:50,789
You don't, okay, Mark, you...
1320
01:02:50,791 --> 01:02:52,190
Yeah, and you're doing the
same shit with Guillermo.
1321
01:02:52,192 --> 01:02:53,057
[Cheri] Yo.
1322
01:02:53,059 --> 01:02:53,992
You're doing the same thing to him.
1323
01:02:53,994 --> 01:02:56,961
Listen to me for God's sakes, you know?
1324
01:02:56,963 --> 01:02:58,028
We have to figure out...
1325
01:02:58,030 --> 01:02:59,164
[Mark] I'm not talking about,
1326
01:02:59,166 --> 01:03:01,633
we're talking about the
mental health of your children.
1327
01:03:01,635 --> 01:03:03,233
Yeah, and my kids have both been in therapy
1328
01:03:03,235 --> 01:03:04,635
- their whole life.
- Yes, I'm a grown man now.
1329
01:03:04,637 --> 01:03:06,237
Yeah, that's bullshit, Mom.
1330
01:03:06,239 --> 01:03:09,106
No, both of my kids been
in therapy, you know?
1331
01:03:09,108 --> 01:03:10,041
I been, I was therapy...
1332
01:03:10,043 --> 01:03:10,941
They luckily had those tools.
1333
01:03:10,943 --> 01:03:11,943
[Mark] You took me to fucking therapy
1334
01:03:11,945 --> 01:03:13,945
when I was five years
old after my dad left.
1335
01:03:13,947 --> 01:03:17,248
- Yeah, and then you were in therapy many times.
- [Mark] I was in therapy for like a fucking week,
1336
01:03:17,250 --> 01:03:18,249
and I went there and I drank apple juice.
1337
01:03:18,251 --> 01:03:19,516
If you didn't...
1338
01:03:19,518 --> 01:03:20,150
That's not enough, Mom.
1339
01:03:20,152 --> 01:03:21,318
If you didn't determine
1340
01:03:21,320 --> 01:03:24,555
to take those tools and to
work on your mental health,
1341
01:03:24,557 --> 01:03:26,657
then that's your responsibility.
1342
01:03:26,659 --> 01:03:29,193
- I've done a damn good job. My life ain't no different...
- It's a responsibility
1343
01:03:29,195 --> 01:03:30,394
as an adult.
1344
01:03:30,396 --> 01:03:32,530
- My life...
- But when I'm a child,
1345
01:03:32,532 --> 01:03:35,733
when I'm fucking 10 year old
child I didn't have a choice.
1346
01:03:35,735 --> 01:03:37,101
- Listen, listen, yes.
- That's what you did!
1347
01:03:37,103 --> 01:03:39,204
- Let me, wait, wait, wait. Don't talk over me.
- You put me...
1348
01:03:39,206 --> 01:03:40,104
- You talked.
- I went to prison.
1349
01:03:40,106 --> 01:03:42,072
I ended up with a fucking drug habit.
1350
01:03:42,074 --> 01:03:44,108
- It's not...
- I did five years in prison.
1351
01:03:44,110 --> 01:03:45,209
Now Guillermo...
1352
01:03:45,211 --> 01:03:47,077
- It's my turn to talk.
- Don't even get me started
1353
01:03:47,079 --> 01:03:48,313
on Guillermo.
1354
01:03:48,315 --> 01:03:50,014
[Cheri] It's not about
the self-absorption.
1355
01:03:50,016 --> 01:03:52,349
I'm not fucking self-absorbed,
and neither is my brother.
1356
01:03:52,351 --> 01:03:55,119
I'm in pain, and I'm sad,
and so the fuck is he.
1357
01:03:55,121 --> 01:03:56,854
And it's because of choices that you made.
1358
01:03:56,856 --> 01:03:59,289
- [Cheri] Well, you're gonna have to...
- And yes I know how to survive on the streets.
1359
01:03:59,291 --> 01:04:00,291
[Cheri] You're gonna have to toughen up.
1360
01:04:00,293 --> 01:04:01,925
And I know how to take
care of other people.
1361
01:04:01,927 --> 01:04:04,429
- [Cheri] You're gonna have to toughen up.
- And I know how to not be selfish.
1362
01:04:04,431 --> 01:04:06,498
- It's easier...
- But I don't know how to fucking love myself.
1363
01:04:06,500 --> 01:04:08,233
[Cheri]Well, then you
better start working on it.
1364
01:04:08,235 --> 01:04:09,168
And neither does he.
1365
01:04:09,170 --> 01:04:10,401
[Cheri] You better start working on it.
1366
01:04:10,403 --> 01:04:13,604
I had you doing affirmations
when you were a little boy.
1367
01:04:13,606 --> 01:04:17,978
And maybe you need to go back
to some of those basic tools.
1368
01:04:51,244 --> 01:04:52,276
Yo, what's up, man?
1369
01:04:52,278 --> 01:04:53,211
It's Mark.
1370
01:04:53,213 --> 01:04:56,250
Holler back at me when you get a chance.
1371
01:04:59,152 --> 01:05:01,621
(hip hop music)
1372
01:07:00,539 --> 01:07:03,244
What the fuck are you doing?
1373
01:07:06,746 --> 01:07:10,251
I'm just letting loose, having fun, Mom.
1374
01:07:10,951 --> 01:07:12,916
[Cheri] You're drinking.
1375
01:07:12,918 --> 01:07:13,952
Yeah, Mom.
1376
01:07:13,954 --> 01:07:16,222
I mean, it's a fucking bar.
1377
01:07:17,690 --> 01:07:20,958
I don't know how you can say that.
1378
01:07:20,960 --> 01:07:22,427
You're destroying your life.
1379
01:07:22,429 --> 01:07:24,697
Mom, I'm fine, all right?
1380
01:07:25,532 --> 01:07:27,867
I'm just trying to have fun.
1381
01:07:29,235 --> 01:07:31,739
You have nothing to worry about.
1382
01:07:40,981 --> 01:07:42,216
Mom!
1383
01:08:10,876 --> 01:08:13,547
(hip hop music)
1384
01:08:24,658 --> 01:08:26,827
(moaning)
1385
01:08:38,438 --> 01:08:39,504
Shit.
1386
01:08:39,506 --> 01:08:40,673
Oh, I'm sorry.
1387
01:09:13,340 --> 01:09:13,974
Yo.
1388
01:09:15,742 --> 01:09:19,643
Yeah, your glasses,
just take those glasses,
1389
01:09:19,645 --> 01:09:20,711
smash 'em on the ground.
1390
01:09:20,713 --> 01:09:21,946
We'll get you contacts.
1391
01:09:21,948 --> 01:09:23,915
I don't want contacts.
1392
01:09:23,917 --> 01:09:26,718
I like the way I look, Mark.
1393
01:09:26,720 --> 01:09:27,887
Are you drunk?
1394
01:09:29,622 --> 01:09:30,457
No.
1395
01:09:36,762 --> 01:09:39,300
[Guillermo] Are you drunk?
1396
01:09:44,104 --> 01:09:46,073
Yes, I'm a little drunk.
1397
01:09:47,940 --> 01:09:51,576
[Guillermo] You said you
weren't gonna drink anymore.
1398
01:09:51,578 --> 01:09:52,413
Yeah.
1399
01:09:54,613 --> 01:09:55,280
Yeah, I said that.
1400
01:09:55,282 --> 01:09:56,446
Well, you know, guess what?
1401
01:09:56,448 --> 01:10:01,018
You know, seriously, this
is the most important thing
1402
01:10:01,020 --> 01:10:03,057
I could tell you, man.
1403
01:10:04,023 --> 01:10:06,656
Is that shit is gonna happen to you,
1404
01:10:06,658 --> 01:10:10,428
and life is just shit happening to you.
1405
01:10:10,430 --> 01:10:13,731
And a lot of fucked up
shit is gonna happen to you.
1406
01:10:13,733 --> 01:10:15,967
And you're gonna get
your fucking heart broken.
1407
01:10:15,969 --> 01:10:17,402
Some girl is gonna come along,
1408
01:10:17,404 --> 01:10:19,035
and she's gonna grab your fucking heart,
1409
01:10:19,037 --> 01:10:21,805
smash it in a million little pieces.
1410
01:10:21,807 --> 01:10:23,607
You're gonna have to
fucking pick up the pieces,
1411
01:10:23,609 --> 01:10:24,576
try and figure out
1412
01:10:24,578 --> 01:10:26,677
how to get the pieces back into your body.
1413
01:10:26,679 --> 01:10:27,978
And you're gonna be sitting there
1414
01:10:27,980 --> 01:10:30,113
like what the fuck just happened.
1415
01:10:30,115 --> 01:10:33,451
And people are gonna
let you down, you know?
1416
01:10:33,453 --> 01:10:36,019
Fucking Mom, Mom is gonna let you down.
1417
01:10:36,021 --> 01:10:37,088
Your dad is gonna let you down.
1418
01:10:37,090 --> 01:10:38,822
Everyone's gonna let you down.
1419
01:10:38,824 --> 01:10:43,059
Life is just a fucking,
one letdown after another.
1420
01:10:43,061 --> 01:10:44,695
It's just, that's life.
1421
01:10:44,697 --> 01:10:48,499
That's all life is, is just
like one fucking letdown.
1422
01:10:48,501 --> 01:10:49,903
Boom, boom, boom.
1423
01:10:51,104 --> 01:10:52,169
You know?
1424
01:10:52,171 --> 01:10:56,109
And all you can really
do is just fucking control
1425
01:10:56,743 --> 01:10:59,847
like how you react to being let down.
1426
01:11:00,779 --> 01:11:01,611
That's it.
1427
01:11:01,613 --> 01:11:02,412
There's nothing else.
1428
01:11:02,414 --> 01:11:06,049
And life is just about controlling
1429
01:11:06,051 --> 01:11:07,018
and that's what life is.
1430
01:11:07,020 --> 01:11:10,987
Look, I honestly, I don't fucking blame you
1431
01:11:10,989 --> 01:11:13,089
for sitting around playing
video games all day, man.
1432
01:11:13,091 --> 01:11:17,063
'Cause it is a fucking cold,
fucked up world out there.
1433
01:11:19,131 --> 01:11:21,067
It is really fucked up.
1434
01:11:22,100 --> 01:11:22,734
You know?
1435
01:11:25,104 --> 01:11:27,604
You understand what I'm saying?
1436
01:11:27,606 --> 01:11:29,874
Are you listening to me right now?
1437
01:11:29,876 --> 01:11:30,708
[Guillermo] Yeah.
1438
01:11:30,710 --> 01:11:31,545
Yeah?
1439
01:11:33,645 --> 01:11:34,544
At the end of the day,
1440
01:11:34,546 --> 01:11:37,583
no one really gives a fuck about you.
1441
01:11:38,818 --> 01:11:39,653
You know?
1442
01:11:41,119 --> 01:11:45,091
You just got to like take
care of yourself, man.
1443
01:11:45,591 --> 01:11:47,027
Good night, Mark.
1444
01:11:48,027 --> 01:11:49,029
That's it.
1445
01:11:55,734 --> 01:11:57,602
It was totally traumatizing.
1446
01:11:57,604 --> 01:11:59,003
'Cause I took your brother,
1447
01:11:59,005 --> 01:12:02,005
and we went to the
Children's Guidance Center.
1448
01:12:02,007 --> 01:12:04,709
And I started taking him to therapy.
1449
01:12:04,711 --> 01:12:08,882
And, you know, he'd cry,
'cause he wanted to see his dad.
1450
01:12:10,082 --> 01:12:12,282
And then he'd start
kicking me and biting me,
1451
01:12:12,284 --> 01:12:14,552
'cause he wanted to see his dad.
1452
01:12:14,554 --> 01:12:15,785
The therapist said to me,
1453
01:12:15,787 --> 01:12:18,724
"Cheri, you know, you're the adult.
1454
01:12:20,527 --> 01:12:24,698
"Even though you're a little
girl, you have to protect him.
1455
01:12:24,898 --> 01:12:28,168
"And the best thing that you can do is,
1456
01:12:29,002 --> 01:12:32,035
"you know, to tell Mark's
father that he can't see him
1457
01:12:32,037 --> 01:12:35,805
"until he gets off of drug and alcohol."
1458
01:12:35,807 --> 01:12:38,177
And Mark's dad never came back.
1459
01:12:55,161 --> 01:12:56,663
I love you, Mom.
1460
01:13:14,046 --> 01:13:15,047
I dig it.
1461
01:13:17,082 --> 01:13:20,084
It's parked around on North Street.
1462
01:13:20,086 --> 01:13:21,052
Thank you.
1463
01:13:21,054 --> 01:13:24,157
(unsettling music)
1464
01:13:35,167 --> 01:13:37,837
(hopeful music)
1465
01:15:40,827 --> 01:15:42,829
(sighs)
1466
01:16:29,108 --> 01:16:31,211
(sighs)
1467
01:16:43,088 --> 01:16:44,789
(sighs)
1468
01:16:44,791 --> 01:16:45,522
We look alike.
1469
01:16:45,524 --> 01:16:46,357
(laughs)
1470
01:16:46,359 --> 01:16:47,191
Yeah.
1471
01:16:47,193 --> 01:16:48,558
God, what do you say?
1472
01:16:48,560 --> 01:16:49,362
It's...
1473
01:16:51,130 --> 01:16:53,930
I've loved you, I've missed you.
1474
01:16:53,932 --> 01:16:57,000
[Mark] I missed you, too.
1475
01:16:57,002 --> 01:17:00,470
(sighs) I think back,
1476
01:17:00,472 --> 01:17:03,476
that period of my life and the time.
1477
01:17:07,046 --> 01:17:10,117
I really wanted to be as, I don't know.
1478
01:17:11,216 --> 01:17:12,318
[Mark] Wow.
1479
01:17:14,052 --> 01:17:16,323
[Mark's Dad] Little Mark.
1480
01:17:17,289 --> 01:17:19,225
How old was I here?
1481
01:17:20,326 --> 01:17:22,058
Four or five.
1482
01:17:22,060 --> 01:17:22,893
I'll have to ask.
1483
01:17:22,895 --> 01:17:25,396
I forgot to ask Carolyn.
1484
01:17:25,398 --> 01:17:27,100
It's really crazy.
1485
01:17:29,202 --> 01:17:30,337
How do you feel?
1486
01:17:32,104 --> 01:17:34,170
(sighs) With my hands.
1487
01:17:34,172 --> 01:17:35,606
Yeah. (laughs)
1488
01:17:35,608 --> 01:17:38,608
Right now I'm feeling a
lot of joy and happiness.
1489
01:17:38,610 --> 01:17:39,442
Yeah.
1490
01:17:39,444 --> 01:17:41,010
Just great to see you.
1491
01:17:41,012 --> 01:17:41,978
Mmm hmm.
1492
01:17:41,980 --> 01:17:43,848
Well, Dad, I guess I'm...
1493
01:17:43,850 --> 01:17:45,482
Glad to hear you say Dad.
1494
01:17:45,484 --> 01:17:47,084
That's a trip.
1495
01:17:47,086 --> 01:17:48,885
I sure want to go fishing with you.
1496
01:17:48,887 --> 01:17:50,053
That'd be fun to sit in a boat,
1497
01:17:50,055 --> 01:17:53,257
make a nice lunch and sit in the boat.
1498
01:17:53,259 --> 01:17:55,092
That'd be cool.
1499
01:17:55,094 --> 01:17:57,294
I like to get big sucker
minnows and a big bobber,
1500
01:17:57,296 --> 01:17:58,896
and I just throw it out there.
1501
01:17:58,898 --> 01:17:59,530
And it's...
1502
01:17:59,532 --> 01:18:01,098
I've never been fishing.
1503
01:18:01,100 --> 01:18:02,031
[Mark's Dad] Never been fishing?
1504
01:18:02,033 --> 01:18:02,933
No.
1505
01:18:02,935 --> 01:18:04,934
Oh, God, that'll be great.
1506
01:18:04,936 --> 01:18:05,969
Yeah.
1507
01:18:05,971 --> 01:18:07,338
Yeah, it'd be nice to...
1508
01:18:07,340 --> 01:18:08,175
Oh yeah.
1509
01:18:09,176 --> 01:18:11,208
do some like father and son shit. (laughs)
1510
01:18:11,210 --> 01:18:12,409
[Mark's Dad] Yeah.
1511
01:18:12,411 --> 01:18:13,611
Yeah.
1512
01:18:13,613 --> 01:18:15,178
We were a happy little family,
1513
01:18:15,180 --> 01:18:19,351
and then just kind of went to shit. (sighs)
1514
01:18:20,051 --> 01:18:21,352
You remember riding in the blue truck?
1515
01:18:21,354 --> 01:18:24,088
And I fight authority
but authority always wins,
1516
01:18:24,090 --> 01:18:25,022
that was our song?
1517
01:18:25,024 --> 01:18:27,090
We had the boom box in the truck and...
1518
01:18:27,092 --> 01:18:31,096
I think the last time that
I remember that we talked,
1519
01:18:33,498 --> 01:18:35,366
I was with my mom.
1520
01:18:35,368 --> 01:18:38,936
And I think you were coming to pick me up.
1521
01:18:38,938 --> 01:18:42,039
And I was gonna get like some Transformers
1522
01:18:42,041 --> 01:18:42,839
or something like that.
1523
01:18:42,841 --> 01:18:45,375
Yeah, bringing you Optimus Prime.
1524
01:18:45,377 --> 01:18:46,343
[Mark] Mmm hmm.
1525
01:18:46,345 --> 01:18:47,414
And then, um.
1526
01:18:50,082 --> 01:18:51,248
Yeah and then...
1527
01:18:51,250 --> 01:18:53,183
I didn't make it, you know?
1528
01:18:53,185 --> 01:18:54,621
I didn't show up.
1529
01:18:57,555 --> 01:19:01,125
Because of the drinking and drugs.
1530
01:19:01,127 --> 01:19:01,962
That's...
1531
01:19:03,194 --> 01:19:04,695
Yeah.
1532
01:19:04,697 --> 01:19:08,065
Addiction, it's a horrible thing.
1533
01:19:08,067 --> 01:19:10,200
Something I passed on. (laughs)
1534
01:19:10,202 --> 01:19:11,335
Yeah.
1535
01:19:11,337 --> 01:19:15,208
But still, that's no fucking
excuse to, I don't know.
1536
01:19:18,010 --> 01:19:20,143
Did you, were you able to get sober ever
1537
01:19:20,145 --> 01:19:22,211
and get any time together and stuff?
1538
01:19:22,213 --> 01:19:24,516
Oh yeah, I've been 20 years.
1539
01:19:26,152 --> 01:19:28,154
20 years, holy shit.
1540
01:19:32,057 --> 01:19:33,523
How long you had this house for?
1541
01:19:33,525 --> 01:19:35,058
Six years, we rent.
1542
01:19:35,060 --> 01:19:36,095
Okay.
1543
01:19:37,329 --> 01:19:40,229
We really went through some
tough financial times, boy.
1544
01:19:40,231 --> 01:19:41,231
Yeah?
1545
01:19:41,233 --> 01:19:44,067
I had started out, we moved to Grand Rapids
1546
01:19:44,069 --> 01:19:45,969
and I bought a home, and lost that.
1547
01:19:45,971 --> 01:19:46,602
And...
1548
01:19:46,604 --> 01:19:47,236
Really?
1549
01:19:47,238 --> 01:19:49,673
It kind of slipped away.
1550
01:19:49,675 --> 01:19:51,275
I reached out to my family
1551
01:19:51,277 --> 01:19:55,448
who didn't want anything
to do with me for 20 years
1552
01:19:57,582 --> 01:19:58,382
to help me.
1553
01:19:58,384 --> 01:20:01,253
And they, my dad wouldn't help me.
1554
01:20:02,354 --> 01:20:03,653
But then my dad got sick,
1555
01:20:03,655 --> 01:20:06,123
but then I got to see him
again before he passed.
1556
01:20:06,125 --> 01:20:07,257
So, I...
1557
01:20:07,259 --> 01:20:08,291
And that's my grandpa?
1558
01:20:08,293 --> 01:20:09,326
Yeah.
1559
01:20:09,328 --> 01:20:11,661
Did I ever meet him?
1560
01:20:11,663 --> 01:20:13,399
Yeah, I don't know.
1561
01:20:15,333 --> 01:20:18,001
I have to ask Carolyn, she'll know.
1562
01:20:18,003 --> 01:20:18,736
What was his name?
1563
01:20:18,738 --> 01:20:19,570
John.
1564
01:20:19,572 --> 01:20:20,571
John.
1565
01:20:20,573 --> 01:20:22,272
What'd he die of?
1566
01:20:22,274 --> 01:20:23,109
Cancer.
1567
01:20:26,378 --> 01:20:27,544
Well, I'm still like,
1568
01:20:27,546 --> 01:20:29,379
I can't believe I'm standing
across from you right now.
1569
01:20:29,381 --> 01:20:31,984
It's definitely really weird.
1570
01:20:34,319 --> 01:20:36,219
It's awesome, man.
1571
01:20:36,221 --> 01:20:37,053
It is.
1572
01:20:37,055 --> 01:20:39,623
It's kind of like, I don't know.
1573
01:20:39,625 --> 01:20:43,262
Well, 20 years of shit kind of went away.
1574
01:20:45,163 --> 01:20:47,430
Or the years I'd be...
1575
01:20:47,432 --> 01:20:48,335
Yeah, 30.
1576
01:20:49,568 --> 01:20:51,101
30, oh.
1577
01:20:51,103 --> 01:20:53,137
[Mark] How old are you now, Dad?
1578
01:20:53,139 --> 01:20:54,504
I'm 60.
1579
01:20:54,506 --> 01:20:57,040
I'll be 61 April 7th.
1580
01:20:57,042 --> 01:20:57,676
Oh, wow.
1581
01:20:59,110 --> 01:21:01,111
I like your tattoos.
1582
01:21:01,113 --> 01:21:04,117
Yeah, I'm really a huge Viking fan.
1583
01:21:05,818 --> 01:21:07,250
My heroes.
1584
01:21:07,252 --> 01:21:08,085
Oh wow.
1585
01:21:08,087 --> 01:21:09,155
Jerry Garcia.
1586
01:21:10,722 --> 01:21:12,388
Jimi Hendrix.
1587
01:21:12,390 --> 01:21:14,728
That's fucking incredible.
1588
01:21:15,828 --> 01:21:18,227
And we got John Lennon.
1589
01:21:18,229 --> 01:21:19,429
Jesus.
1590
01:21:19,431 --> 01:21:22,232
Love John, so does your mom.
1591
01:21:22,234 --> 01:21:23,834
And Janis Joplin.
1592
01:21:23,836 --> 01:21:26,139
Oh, I had a crush on her.
1593
01:21:29,108 --> 01:21:30,240
Oh, cool!
1594
01:21:30,242 --> 01:21:31,077
Wow.
1595
01:21:32,211 --> 01:21:32,843
Isn't that cool?
1596
01:21:32,845 --> 01:21:33,677
That is cool!
1597
01:21:33,679 --> 01:21:34,378
[Mark] I know.
1598
01:21:34,380 --> 01:21:36,312
Like all those too, already.
1599
01:21:36,314 --> 01:21:37,483
[Mark] Yeah.
1600
01:21:40,152 --> 01:21:42,119
What's this about on your arm?
1601
01:21:42,121 --> 01:21:44,455
Oh I have, from dialysis.
1602
01:21:44,457 --> 01:21:45,625
So I got to...
1603
01:21:46,658 --> 01:21:47,590
Oh, right.
1604
01:21:47,592 --> 01:21:49,125
keep it bandaged.
1605
01:21:49,127 --> 01:21:52,629
Last April I went, had
a stem cell transplant.
1606
01:21:52,631 --> 01:21:56,165
Well, that's where they
take out, they go in,
1607
01:21:56,167 --> 01:21:59,202
get all this horrible chemo
that kills everything in you.
1608
01:21:59,204 --> 01:22:02,873
Then they harvest some
good stem cells out of me,
1609
01:22:02,875 --> 01:22:05,375
and then they put it back in.
1610
01:22:05,377 --> 01:22:06,809
[Mark] Yeah.
1611
01:22:06,811 --> 01:22:08,611
'Cause the cancer ate up my kidneys,
1612
01:22:08,613 --> 01:22:11,415
so I'm on dialysis three times a week.
1613
01:22:11,417 --> 01:22:15,588
And that's lately really
been kicking my ass.
1614
01:22:15,787 --> 01:22:16,820
[Mark] What is that like?
1615
01:22:16,822 --> 01:22:17,987
What do you have to do?
1616
01:22:17,989 --> 01:22:21,791
You go in, and they take
out your blood and clean it,
1617
01:22:21,793 --> 01:22:23,293
and put it back in.
1618
01:22:23,295 --> 01:22:25,595
Four hours in the chair.
1619
01:22:25,597 --> 01:22:28,134
Appetite still is a problem.
1620
01:22:29,467 --> 01:22:32,236
Don't feel like eating,
that's hard to explain.
1621
01:22:32,238 --> 01:22:33,273
Mmm hmm.
1622
01:22:35,173 --> 01:22:37,241
Because you want to keep on weight.
1623
01:22:37,243 --> 01:22:39,675
You don't want to lose weight.
1624
01:22:39,677 --> 01:22:42,681
Yeah, because shit, I used to weigh,
1625
01:22:44,149 --> 01:22:46,215
well, I lost almost 100 pounds.
1626
01:22:46,217 --> 01:22:48,152
I used to weigh 280.
1627
01:22:48,154 --> 01:22:49,253
Wow.
1628
01:22:49,255 --> 01:22:51,224
And now I'm down to 176.
1629
01:22:53,192 --> 01:22:55,161
It just shh, consumes you.
1630
01:22:57,296 --> 01:22:59,196
I remember my kidney
doctor, he talked to me.
1631
01:22:59,198 --> 01:23:02,165
And he said when he first met me,
1632
01:23:02,167 --> 01:23:05,568
that he said "I gave
you six months to live."
1633
01:23:05,570 --> 01:23:07,905
And that really freaked me out.
1634
01:23:07,907 --> 01:23:09,505
Yeah.
1635
01:23:09,507 --> 01:23:12,543
You know, it's working
to make its comeback.
1636
01:23:12,545 --> 01:23:14,678
That's what bad about cancer.
1637
01:23:14,680 --> 01:23:15,812
You get rid of it for a while,
1638
01:23:15,814 --> 01:23:18,848
but then it's like it gets
pissed and it comes back.
1639
01:23:18,850 --> 01:23:21,184
What kind of cancer was it again?
1640
01:23:21,186 --> 01:23:23,256
Non-Hodgkin's lymphoma.
1641
01:23:24,489 --> 01:23:26,956
It's cancer of my blood.
1642
01:23:26,958 --> 01:23:27,958
Mmm hmm.
1643
01:23:27,960 --> 01:23:29,492
[Mark's Dad] And...
1644
01:23:29,494 --> 01:23:33,196
I'd hate to think like (sighs).
1645
01:23:33,198 --> 01:23:35,732
Yeah, get back together and fucking die?
1646
01:23:35,734 --> 01:23:38,434
Yeah, that's, (laughs)
1647
01:23:38,436 --> 01:23:39,535
that's fucked.
1648
01:23:39,537 --> 01:23:41,671
It's not supposed to be that way.
1649
01:23:41,673 --> 01:23:43,906
No, I don't want it to be that way.
1650
01:23:43,908 --> 01:23:45,808
With all those years that I,
1651
01:23:45,810 --> 01:23:47,843
I've wasted them, you know?
1652
01:23:47,845 --> 01:23:49,379
It's just fucked up.
1653
01:23:49,381 --> 01:23:51,415
And I don't want it to be that way.
1654
01:23:51,417 --> 01:23:53,586
I (sobs).
1655
01:23:57,590 --> 01:24:00,159
I wish (sobs).
1656
01:24:06,231 --> 01:24:08,764
A brightness, happiness.
1657
01:24:08,766 --> 01:24:12,604
'Cause when I was excited
for stuff like that.
1658
01:24:26,952 --> 01:24:30,019
God I loved you, honey, when you were born.
1659
01:24:30,021 --> 01:24:31,256
And, oh.
1660
01:24:34,960 --> 01:24:38,894
♪ It's always cold
1661
01:24:38,896 --> 01:24:41,900
♪ This time of year
1662
01:24:44,036 --> 01:24:47,273
♪ A body never forgets
1663
01:24:50,376 --> 01:24:54,010
♪ The leaves are gone
1664
01:24:54,012 --> 01:24:57,317
♪ The rain is here
1665
01:24:59,018 --> 01:25:02,588
♪ A voice grows ever quiet
1666
01:25:05,690 --> 01:25:09,761
♪ At dusk there's a slight delay
1667
01:25:13,064 --> 01:25:17,269
♪ But the sun always slips away
1668
01:25:19,805 --> 01:25:22,742
♪ Full of violence
1669
01:25:27,313 --> 01:25:30,016
♪ Sons of violence
1670
01:25:35,020 --> 01:25:37,924
♪ Sons of violence
1671
01:25:40,559 --> 01:25:43,630
♪ I'm safe and sound
1672
01:25:48,701 --> 01:25:51,371
♪ All by myself
1673
01:25:56,007 --> 01:25:58,411
♪ Left aside
1674
01:25:59,944 --> 01:26:03,882
♪ I'll keep on with my life
1675
01:26:08,654 --> 01:26:11,521
[Guillermo] Well, not
first-person point of view.
1676
01:26:11,523 --> 01:26:12,425
Let's try.
1677
01:26:18,697 --> 01:26:20,464
(blabbering) (laughs)
1678
01:26:20,466 --> 01:26:24,470
[Woman On Phone] (laughs) Oh.
1679
01:26:25,537 --> 01:26:29,606
All right, take care man, I love you.
1680
01:26:29,608 --> 01:26:30,406
Good?
1681
01:26:30,408 --> 01:26:31,107
Yeah.
1682
01:26:31,109 --> 01:26:32,041
Burned you again, didn't I?
1683
01:26:32,043 --> 01:26:32,942
Uh, no.
1684
01:26:32,944 --> 01:26:35,314
(laughs)
1685
01:26:42,720 --> 01:26:43,620
Hey bro.
1686
01:26:43,622 --> 01:26:44,990
It's been a while.
1687
01:26:47,458 --> 01:26:51,061
So my documentary has been
coming along really well.
1688
01:26:51,063 --> 01:26:55,001
I'm so sorry to hear
the news about your dad.
1689
01:26:58,436 --> 01:27:00,704
Wish I could be there.
1690
01:27:00,706 --> 01:27:01,873
But, you know,
1691
01:27:05,978 --> 01:27:09,849
I hope you're dealing
with it in a safe way,
1692
01:27:16,121 --> 01:27:16,989
yeah.
1693
01:27:19,056 --> 01:27:20,891
(child coughing)
1694
01:27:20,893 --> 01:27:23,093
[Guillermo] We got to see each other soon.
1695
01:27:23,095 --> 01:27:24,960
I love you, bro.
1696
01:27:24,962 --> 01:27:27,132
Call me when you get this.
1697
01:27:33,005 --> 01:27:34,907
[Woman] Good morning.
1698
01:27:39,817 --> 01:27:44,817
Subtitles by explosiveskull
1699
01:27:47,653 --> 01:27:50,620
♪ Everything I ever was
1700
01:27:50,622 --> 01:27:52,792
♪ Came from being in the mud
1701
01:27:53,458 --> 01:27:55,728
♪ Money doesn't equal love
1702
01:27:56,228 --> 01:27:58,931
♪ Gotta feed my flesh and blood
1703
01:27:59,497 --> 01:28:02,566
♪ I know that I'm
supposed to make changes
1704
01:28:02,568 --> 01:28:05,735
♪ I ain't going back on that road
1705
01:28:05,737 --> 01:28:08,671
♪ If it's over flesh and blood
1706
01:28:08,673 --> 01:28:11,042
♪ I let the devil take my soul
1707
01:28:11,577 --> 01:28:14,510
♪ Everything I ever was
1708
01:28:14,512 --> 01:28:17,147
♪ Came from being in the mud
1709
01:28:17,149 --> 01:28:19,786
♪ Money doesn't equal love
1710
01:28:19,984 --> 01:28:23,786
♪ But I gotta feed
my flesh and blood
1711
01:28:23,788 --> 01:28:26,822
♪ I know that I'm
supposed to make changes
1712
01:28:26,824 --> 01:28:29,692
♪ I ain't going back on that road
1713
01:28:29,694 --> 01:28:32,262
♪ If it's over flesh and blood
1714
01:28:32,264 --> 01:28:34,964
♪ I let the devil take my soul
1715
01:28:34,966 --> 01:28:36,967
♪ I gotta make
something happen quick
1716
01:28:36,969 --> 01:28:39,001
♪ Contemplating
playing devil's advocate
1717
01:28:39,003 --> 01:28:40,269
♪ Its addicts in my cast
1718
01:28:40,271 --> 01:28:41,905
♪ But they ain't
actors and actresses
1719
01:28:41,907 --> 01:28:45,275
♪ They arms is fractured with the
scars from the cause of what's happening
1720
01:28:45,277 --> 01:28:48,077
♪ Packaged in that blue wrap
Youngins want to move that
1721
01:28:48,079 --> 01:28:51,080
♪ They know they gonna do what
they got to to come through back
1722
01:28:51,082 --> 01:28:55,751
♪ I was in that trap then Everybody
knew that cuz everybody was then
1723
01:28:55,753 --> 01:28:57,254
♪ Now it's like we dug in
1724
01:28:57,256 --> 01:29:00,055
♪ See my man 200 pounds
Now he like a buck ten
1725
01:29:00,057 --> 01:29:03,159
♪ Started with them Perc
tens Damn we was bucks then
1726
01:29:03,161 --> 01:29:05,829
♪ Friends we grew up with
is gettin' life plus ten
1727
01:29:05,831 --> 01:29:09,299
♪ I just hope my flesh and
blood know how much I love them
1728
01:29:09,301 --> 01:29:10,169
♪ For real
1729
01:29:11,537 --> 01:29:14,169
♪ Everything I ever was
1730
01:29:14,171 --> 01:29:17,173
♪ Came from being in the mud
1731
01:29:17,175 --> 01:29:19,942
♪ Money doesn't equal love
1732
01:29:19,944 --> 01:29:23,546
♪ But I gotta feed
my flesh and blood
1733
01:29:23,548 --> 01:29:26,148
♪ I know that I'm
supposed to make changes
1734
01:29:26,150 --> 01:29:29,686
♪ I ain't going back on that road
1735
01:29:29,688 --> 01:29:32,187
♪ If it's over flesh and blood
1736
01:29:32,189 --> 01:29:34,156
♪ Let the devil take my soul
1737
01:29:34,158 --> 01:29:37,059
♪ Take my soul, take my
soul Let him take my soul
1738
01:29:37,061 --> 01:29:39,995
♪ Sometimes I think I
feel the devil take control
1739
01:29:39,997 --> 01:29:43,232
♪ Why they gotta speak so reckless,
are they dumb I hate this phone
1740
01:29:43,234 --> 01:29:46,236
♪ Sometimes I hate this hustle
life but I be makin' dough
1741
01:29:46,238 --> 01:29:49,839
♪ See me making dough outie
on the payments go haters know
1742
01:29:49,841 --> 01:29:53,276
♪ All diesel on me like I'm
slanging dope Yeah gotta take it slow
1743
01:29:53,278 --> 01:29:55,277
♪ Yeah, I'm a take it slow
1744
01:29:55,279 --> 01:29:57,347
♪ But deep down I know
I'm gonna make it though
1745
01:29:57,349 --> 01:29:59,316
♪ Roaches scatter when
you turn the light on
1746
01:29:59,318 --> 01:30:00,617
♪ I had to get my flight on
1747
01:30:00,619 --> 01:30:04,019
♪ They say I had to build
myself up They was right on
1748
01:30:04,021 --> 01:30:06,923
♪ Snakes in the grass
Feed the rats to the pythons
1749
01:30:06,925 --> 01:30:09,858
♪ I'm down five No time
left Reach for the pylon
1750
01:30:09,860 --> 01:30:12,963
♪ Cause I'm just tryin to
score I'm just tryin' to tour
1751
01:30:12,965 --> 01:30:15,999
♪ Everybody draw
This the Art of War
1752
01:30:16,001 --> 01:30:18,968
♪ We was in that bando
sleepin' on the floor
1753
01:30:18,970 --> 01:30:23,706
♪ I sacrifice for mine What
did you sacrifice for yours?
1754
01:30:23,708 --> 01:30:26,776
♪ I know that I'm
supposed to make changes
1755
01:30:26,778 --> 01:30:29,745
♪ I ain't going back on that road
1756
01:30:29,747 --> 01:30:32,715
♪ But if it's over flesh and blood
1757
01:30:32,717 --> 01:30:35,785
♪ Let the devil take my soul
1758
01:30:35,787 --> 01:30:38,687
♪ Everything I ever was
1759
01:30:38,689 --> 01:30:41,724
♪ Came from being in the mud
1760
01:30:41,726 --> 01:30:44,259
♪ Money doesn't equal love
1761
01:30:44,261 --> 01:30:47,664
♪ But I gotta feed
my flesh and blood
1762
01:30:47,666 --> 01:30:50,733
♪ I know that I'm
supposed to make changes
1763
01:30:50,735 --> 01:30:53,769
♪ I ain't going back on that road
1764
01:30:53,771 --> 01:30:56,373
♪ If it's over flesh and blood
1765
01:30:56,375 --> 01:30:58,241
♪ I let the devil take my soul
1766
01:30:58,243 --> 01:31:01,343
♪ Take my soul, take my
soul Let him take my soul
1767
01:31:01,345 --> 01:31:04,950
♪ Sometimes I think I
feel the devil take control
123888
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