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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,234 --> 00:00:04,709 Okay, if you think you've lived through a bad day, 2 00:00:04,734 --> 00:00:06,772 try being our next guest. 3 00:00:06,797 --> 00:00:09,078 When she showed up to a screening of her new film, 4 00:00:09,103 --> 00:00:11,577 "The Crows Have Eyes: The Crowening... " 5 00:00:11,602 --> 00:00:14,209 - Fun name! - It is! 6 00:00:14,234 --> 00:00:17,932 The last thing she expected was an actual crow attack! 7 00:00:19,816 --> 00:00:22,321 Oh... 8 00:00:22,346 --> 00:00:24,523 Well, now we're being told that the whole thing 9 00:00:24,548 --> 00:00:27,335 was a PR stunt put out by the movie. 10 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,510 Now, is that clever or what? 11 00:00:29,535 --> 00:00:32,189 It sure is! We are so very lucky 12 00:00:32,214 --> 00:00:35,115 to be joined this morning by Moira Rose. 13 00:00:35,140 --> 00:00:36,304 - Well, ach! - Ach! 14 00:00:36,329 --> 00:00:38,849 - What a ride this has been! - Yes. 15 00:00:38,874 --> 00:00:40,942 What a ride indeed, Barb! 16 00:00:41,356 --> 00:00:43,324 Oh, let me first assure your viewers 17 00:00:43,349 --> 00:00:46,002 that... not a single crow was harmed, 18 00:00:46,027 --> 00:00:47,296 and as for the humans, 19 00:00:47,321 --> 00:00:49,773 oh, nothing but a little wounded pride... 20 00:00:49,798 --> 00:00:51,999 and one severed earlobe. 21 00:00:52,024 --> 00:00:53,877 - Oh! - Ouch! Yeah! 22 00:00:53,902 --> 00:00:55,946 Yes, everything you saw 23 00:00:55,971 --> 00:00:57,638 was part of a carefully orchestrated, 24 00:00:57,663 --> 00:00:59,764 entirely deliberate stunt. 25 00:00:59,789 --> 00:01:02,495 Oh, well, it seems to have worked, Moira. 26 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:05,155 With over more than 2 million views 27 00:01:05,180 --> 00:01:07,314 in less than 24 hours, 28 00:01:07,339 --> 00:01:10,770 this video has created an incredible buzz for the movie, 29 00:01:10,795 --> 00:01:13,163 which, as of right now, 30 00:01:13,188 --> 00:01:16,490 is officially trending on Interflix. 31 00:01:16,515 --> 00:01:18,316 It is?! 32 00:01:18,341 --> 00:01:20,476 Well, if you're saying it's a smash hit, 33 00:01:20,501 --> 00:01:23,218 then I'm just going to have to take your word for it. 34 00:01:23,265 --> 00:01:25,199 As well as the word of millions of streamers 35 00:01:25,224 --> 00:01:27,536 across the internet, I suppose. 36 00:01:27,561 --> 00:01:30,129 You know, the brilliant thing about being on streaming 37 00:01:30,171 --> 00:01:33,092 is that one can start the movie at any point, 38 00:01:33,117 --> 00:01:34,918 any time they like. 39 00:01:34,943 --> 00:01:37,244 You know, Moira, I think it's safe to say 40 00:01:37,269 --> 00:01:39,598 you are officially back in the game! 41 00:01:39,623 --> 00:01:40,824 Yes! 42 00:01:40,925 --> 00:01:42,692 Well, you heard it here first! 43 00:01:42,717 --> 00:01:44,523 Do not adjust your sets! 44 00:01:45,329 --> 00:01:47,097 Excuse me, but I'd be remiss 45 00:01:47,122 --> 00:01:50,202 if I didn't acknowledge my daughter, Alexis Rose. 46 00:01:51,718 --> 00:01:55,462 This whole PR coup d'état never would've happened without her. 47 00:01:55,487 --> 00:01:57,422 Honestly, we just had fun with it. 48 00:01:57,447 --> 00:01:59,757 Can't hear you. Poor dear's not mic'd. 49 00:01:59,782 --> 00:02:02,178 Well, looks like there's no stopping you two now! 50 00:02:02,203 --> 00:02:04,071 - Congratulations! - Hmhm. 51 00:02:04,304 --> 00:02:06,138 Thank you! 52 00:02:06,612 --> 00:02:11,612 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 53 00:02:14,015 --> 00:02:16,116 Gentlemen. Morning. 54 00:02:16,141 --> 00:02:19,183 I believe you've met my roommate, Bob. 55 00:02:19,208 --> 00:02:21,142 - Roommate? - Mm-hmm. 56 00:02:21,356 --> 00:02:23,467 Yeah. Uh, Ronnie's been nice enough 57 00:02:23,491 --> 00:02:24,958 to let me stay in her guest room, 58 00:02:24,983 --> 00:02:26,582 ever since Gwen... 59 00:02:27,913 --> 00:02:29,180 took the house. 60 00:02:29,205 --> 00:02:32,878 Yeah. And as much as I'm enjoying the slumber party, 61 00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:35,966 I really think that Bob could use a change of scenery. 62 00:02:35,991 --> 00:02:38,493 Maybe he could crash here for a night... 63 00:02:38,518 --> 00:02:40,018 or six? 64 00:02:40,141 --> 00:02:42,676 - Uh, yeah... - I don't think we, uh, 65 00:02:42,701 --> 00:02:44,995 we have any clean rooms available. 66 00:02:45,020 --> 00:02:47,188 Oh, I... I don't mind a dirty room. 67 00:02:47,471 --> 00:02:50,784 I hope that doesn't sound as sad as... 68 00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:52,623 as it feels. 69 00:02:52,648 --> 00:02:55,250 Bob, why, why don't you take a seat? 70 00:02:55,275 --> 00:02:57,801 And grab some water while you're at it, 71 00:02:57,826 --> 00:03:01,010 'cause you should really hydrate after all that crying. 72 00:03:01,035 --> 00:03:03,503 Gwen used to love water. 73 00:03:11,088 --> 00:03:12,955 Okay, I feel badly for Bob, 74 00:03:13,174 --> 00:03:14,851 but it's not a good look 75 00:03:14,876 --> 00:03:16,792 to have him wallowing around here. 76 00:03:16,817 --> 00:03:18,632 Well, where do you want the guy to wallow? 77 00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:21,248 I mean, Johnny, there's plenty of sad people 78 00:03:21,273 --> 00:03:22,828 staying at this motel. 79 00:03:22,853 --> 00:03:26,162 That's not exactly how I'd describe our guests, Roland. 80 00:03:26,187 --> 00:03:27,955 Well, I'm just saying, maybe he could meet 81 00:03:27,980 --> 00:03:29,726 a fellow wallower here? 82 00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:32,131 Oh, it'd be really nice if Bob could meet somebody 83 00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:33,594 'cause from what I hear, 84 00:03:33,619 --> 00:03:35,398 Gwen isn't exactly sitting at home. 85 00:03:35,423 --> 00:03:37,090 Or, what if... 86 00:03:37,666 --> 00:03:40,435 we take Bob out for the evening 87 00:03:40,836 --> 00:03:43,604 and kind of act as his wing-men 88 00:03:43,629 --> 00:03:45,430 Johnny, you know, the whole dating scene 89 00:03:45,455 --> 00:03:47,923 has kind of changed a little since you were single. 90 00:03:47,948 --> 00:03:50,203 First off, we now have electricity. 91 00:03:52,495 --> 00:03:55,097 Okay, all right, are you in or not? 92 00:03:55,122 --> 00:03:57,226 Ooh, I'm in. 'Cause I don't wanna miss a chance 93 00:03:57,251 --> 00:03:59,252 to see how this plays out. 94 00:03:59,949 --> 00:04:03,099 - Bob? - Well, it... it would be so nice 95 00:04:03,679 --> 00:04:07,261 to not be completely alone for a night. 96 00:04:07,286 --> 00:04:09,053 Uh, lucky Gwen, 97 00:04:09,078 --> 00:04:11,647 she has another one of her male cousins visiting. 98 00:04:16,367 --> 00:04:19,193 - This coffee's delicious. - Thank you. 99 00:04:19,218 --> 00:04:20,900 Yeah, it's... it's sort of burning my hand a bit 100 00:04:20,925 --> 00:04:23,219 because I can't put it down on anything. 101 00:04:23,244 --> 00:04:25,998 David, you know that the new coffee table is coming today, 102 00:04:26,023 --> 00:04:28,491 and that it takes a little bit longer when it's handmade. 103 00:04:28,516 --> 00:04:29,664 Handmade, yeah. 104 00:04:29,689 --> 00:04:30,967 You know what I think you should do? 105 00:04:31,151 --> 00:04:32,843 Just come over here and relax for a bit. 106 00:04:32,975 --> 00:04:34,942 Sit down, we could put our... 107 00:04:35,050 --> 00:04:36,628 our feet up on the... 108 00:04:37,091 --> 00:04:38,581 You happy now? 109 00:04:38,831 --> 00:04:40,694 Just do me a favour and watch these, 110 00:04:40,795 --> 00:04:42,629 - and don't eat them. - Mm. No guarantees. 111 00:04:44,365 --> 00:04:45,587 - Hey. - Hey. 112 00:04:45,612 --> 00:04:47,701 - Coffee table for Patrick? - That's me, yeah. 113 00:04:47,802 --> 00:04:49,312 You look super familiar. 114 00:04:49,337 --> 00:04:50,579 Have we ordered from you before? 115 00:04:50,604 --> 00:04:52,758 Uh, I don't know. I... I get a lot of orders. 116 00:04:53,117 --> 00:04:54,923 - Do you mind if I uh... ? - Yeah, come on in. 117 00:04:54,948 --> 00:04:57,850 Uh, it's just right there. Yeah. 118 00:04:58,346 --> 00:05:00,347 'Kay. 119 00:05:04,415 --> 00:05:07,621 I'm sorry, this is who made your table? 120 00:05:07,722 --> 00:05:08,938 - David! - Hi. 121 00:05:08,963 --> 00:05:10,719 - What're you doing here? - Okay. Muah. 122 00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:12,251 Wow. We're still doing that. 123 00:05:12,281 --> 00:05:15,082 Uh, this is my boyfriend's place. 124 00:05:15,573 --> 00:05:16,873 - Fiancé. - Fiancé. 125 00:05:16,898 --> 00:05:19,275 Yeah. Now I remember where we met before. 126 00:05:19,300 --> 00:05:20,563 - Stevie's apartment. - At Stevie's. 127 00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:23,170 Bingo. I'm sorry for not remembering. 128 00:05:23,195 --> 00:05:24,977 - I meet a lot of people. - Mm. 129 00:05:25,002 --> 00:05:27,003 That is a great sweater, by the way. 130 00:05:27,028 --> 00:05:29,552 - It really brings out your lips. - Okay. 131 00:05:30,532 --> 00:05:32,431 Well, thank you for the coffee table. 132 00:05:32,456 --> 00:05:34,024 - Yeah. - Yeah. 133 00:05:34,049 --> 00:05:36,050 I am also wearing a sweater. 134 00:05:36,393 --> 00:05:38,969 A lot of sweat went into this one. 135 00:05:39,869 --> 00:05:42,610 This is one of my best pieces. You got great taste. 136 00:05:42,835 --> 00:05:44,635 And from the looks of it, so does David. 137 00:05:44,660 --> 00:05:46,929 Okay. I'm gonna go uh... 138 00:05:46,954 --> 00:05:48,405 you know, I'm gonna check on the... 139 00:05:48,429 --> 00:05:49,477 - Perfect! Yeah. - Pancakes. 140 00:05:49,502 --> 00:05:51,932 Say, you know what? I was just planning on having 141 00:05:51,957 --> 00:05:53,825 a chill night in, but if you guys are free, 142 00:05:53,850 --> 00:05:55,690 I'd love for you to come by for a whiskey or... 143 00:05:55,715 --> 00:05:58,243 - whatever. - O...Kay. 144 00:05:58,268 --> 00:05:59,835 You know... 145 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:02,186 You know what? We'll, we'll think about that for a sec 146 00:06:02,210 --> 00:06:04,111 - and see, and see. - Great! 147 00:06:04,136 --> 00:06:05,903 - Hope to see you tonight. - Okay. 148 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:08,015 And for what it's worth, 149 00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:09,829 you guys make a beautiful couple. 150 00:06:09,854 --> 00:06:11,337 Thank you so much. 151 00:06:18,490 --> 00:06:19,795 - What? - No, you're just, your face 152 00:06:19,820 --> 00:06:21,843 is all red. It's beet red. 153 00:06:21,868 --> 00:06:23,502 - It is not! - Mm-hmm. It's flush. 154 00:06:25,506 --> 00:06:27,514 - Hey, babe! - Hey, babe! 155 00:06:27,539 --> 00:06:29,459 Oh my God! Where are you? Is that the ocean? 156 00:06:29,484 --> 00:06:32,239 I wish. It's a poster of the ocean. 157 00:06:32,340 --> 00:06:34,408 'Cause I'm actually in Stewart's dorm room right now 158 00:06:34,433 --> 00:06:36,634 because mine got evacuated last night - 159 00:06:36,811 --> 00:06:39,222 small fire ants issue. 160 00:06:39,247 --> 00:06:41,515 Yikes! Hope everything's okay. 161 00:06:41,540 --> 00:06:44,703 It was a real "Fyre Fest." 162 00:06:44,728 --> 00:06:47,030 You do not wanna see Krista's ankles today. 163 00:06:47,131 --> 00:06:49,098 But, it's all good. 164 00:06:49,123 --> 00:06:50,563 We'll be getting our dorms back in... 165 00:06:50,588 --> 00:06:52,221 better shape than we left 'em. 166 00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:54,154 - Can't wait. - Let's talk about you! 167 00:06:54,179 --> 00:06:56,173 Everyone here has been watching your video! 168 00:06:56,197 --> 00:06:57,864 And to think it was all fake? 169 00:06:57,889 --> 00:07:00,510 Totally fake. Isn't that wild? 170 00:07:00,535 --> 00:07:03,003 And all of these PR agencies from New York are calling 171 00:07:03,028 --> 00:07:04,425 to ask me how I did it. 172 00:07:04,450 --> 00:07:05,817 How did you do it? 173 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:08,075 Um, it's like a little bit too complicated 174 00:07:08,100 --> 00:07:10,368 - to explain over this. - Hi, Theodore! 175 00:07:10,393 --> 00:07:11,714 Gorgeous view! 176 00:07:11,739 --> 00:07:13,640 Hi, Mrs. Rose! Congrats on the movie! 177 00:07:13,665 --> 00:07:16,259 That last scene where you leap from your nest 178 00:07:16,284 --> 00:07:17,948 only to discover that your wings 179 00:07:17,973 --> 00:07:20,475 - aren't developed enough yet... - Oh, you're too kind. 180 00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:23,123 The Daily Mail called it a "flap for the ages!" 181 00:07:23,148 --> 00:07:25,249 Okay, can I have my boyfriend back now, please? 182 00:07:25,426 --> 00:07:26,503 Hm. 183 00:07:26,528 --> 00:07:28,323 Oh! 184 00:07:28,348 --> 00:07:30,151 It's Buzzfeed calling about the 10 goriest 185 00:07:30,176 --> 00:07:32,245 Clara Mandrake accidents from the film. 186 00:07:32,270 --> 00:07:33,971 Best we take it. 187 00:07:33,996 --> 00:07:35,706 And don't forget, we have a conference call 188 00:07:35,731 --> 00:07:38,456 with the Interflix PR people in a tight 15. 189 00:07:38,573 --> 00:07:39,973 - Okay. - Wow, 190 00:07:39,998 --> 00:07:41,589 it seems like you've got a lot going on, Alexis. 191 00:07:41,614 --> 00:07:43,511 Yes, but not too much for you. 192 00:07:43,536 --> 00:07:44,972 No, don't worry about me, 193 00:07:44,997 --> 00:07:46,664 you're obviously in high demand. 194 00:07:47,048 --> 00:07:48,916 Alexis! They're asking about co-stars. 195 00:07:48,941 --> 00:07:51,609 I can't be expected to remember everyone I meet! 196 00:07:51,634 --> 00:07:54,065 Mm. Okay, okay. Well, I guess I do have to go, 197 00:07:54,113 --> 00:07:55,417 but I will see you in a few days 198 00:07:55,442 --> 00:07:56,472 and I can't wait! 199 00:07:56,497 --> 00:07:58,362 - I can't wait either. - Alexis! 200 00:07:58,387 --> 00:08:00,034 Okay, I'm coming. Ugh! 201 00:08:00,149 --> 00:08:01,893 Okay, love you! Love you- 202 00:08:01,918 --> 00:08:03,352 Ooh! 203 00:08:07,983 --> 00:08:09,984 I don't think we're the same size, Johnny. 204 00:08:10,538 --> 00:08:13,340 I might have a trouble fitting tissues into these pockets. 205 00:08:13,365 --> 00:08:14,659 Oh, you won't need tissues. 206 00:08:14,684 --> 00:08:16,448 There'll be no crying tonight, Bob. 207 00:08:16,473 --> 00:08:18,531 You look like a million bucks. 208 00:08:18,556 --> 00:08:20,534 Well, actually, Bob, in Johnny's suit there, 209 00:08:20,559 --> 00:08:22,492 you look like a guy who had a million bucks, 210 00:08:22,517 --> 00:08:24,276 but then lost it. 211 00:08:24,301 --> 00:08:25,722 Very funny, Roland. 212 00:08:25,747 --> 00:08:27,348 Now, the suit works, Bob. 213 00:08:27,597 --> 00:08:29,932 Bob, in my experience, 214 00:08:30,370 --> 00:08:32,592 it doesn't matter what you wear. 215 00:08:32,617 --> 00:08:34,542 It's all about being yourself. 216 00:08:34,605 --> 00:08:35,972 I think the last person 217 00:08:35,997 --> 00:08:37,765 Bob wants to be right now is himself. 218 00:08:37,790 --> 00:08:39,257 I agree with Roland. 219 00:08:39,282 --> 00:08:41,293 I don't know if I can speak on behalf of women here... 220 00:08:41,318 --> 00:08:42,452 You can't. 221 00:08:42,780 --> 00:08:45,381 Moira used to say, when she was single, 222 00:08:45,406 --> 00:08:47,193 she would always be attracted to men 223 00:08:47,218 --> 00:08:49,018 who could make her laugh. 224 00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:50,604 How'd she end up with you? 225 00:08:51,854 --> 00:08:54,233 All right, why don't we try a little test run here. 226 00:08:54,258 --> 00:08:56,745 Let's imagine we're in a bar. 227 00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:59,405 Ronnie, do you wanna be the woman in this little scenario? 228 00:08:59,430 --> 00:09:02,499 - Not a chance. - Okay. Mm! 229 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,368 Move over. I... will be the woman. 230 00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,213 Okay. So we're in a bar 231 00:09:07,238 --> 00:09:10,440 and, uh, you see this very intriguing looking gentleman. 232 00:09:10,588 --> 00:09:12,355 Okay. 233 00:09:12,909 --> 00:09:15,178 Hello, I'm... 234 00:09:15,279 --> 00:09:16,913 - I'm Gwen. - Oh... 235 00:09:17,021 --> 00:09:18,889 - You had to pick Gwen? - I'm sorry, 236 00:09:18,914 --> 00:09:20,548 I saw Bob standing there 237 00:09:20,573 --> 00:09:22,117 and that was the first name I thought of. 238 00:09:22,142 --> 00:09:23,225 - They're always together. - Okay. Hold it together. 239 00:09:23,250 --> 00:09:25,623 - Pick another name! - Okay, all right. 240 00:09:26,335 --> 00:09:28,703 Uh... okay, yeah. 241 00:09:29,147 --> 00:09:31,828 Hi. I'm Ronnie. 242 00:09:31,929 --> 00:09:33,139 That's my friend Gwen. Oh... 243 00:09:33,164 --> 00:09:34,842 Okay, this is a disaster. 244 00:09:34,867 --> 00:09:37,056 Thank you, Roland. I'll take over from here. 245 00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:38,748 Bob, honestly, 246 00:09:38,773 --> 00:09:41,037 You know, just a few runs and... 247 00:09:41,062 --> 00:09:42,655 you're gonna be drowning in phone numbers. 248 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:45,928 No. No... 249 00:09:45,953 --> 00:09:48,055 I... I can't breathe. 250 00:09:48,396 --> 00:09:50,096 Ooh. 251 00:09:52,315 --> 00:09:55,127 You know what? Jake did a great job with this. 252 00:09:55,152 --> 00:09:56,819 Mm-hmm. I was just about to say 253 00:09:56,844 --> 00:09:59,064 this coffee table really brings out your lips. 254 00:09:59,655 --> 00:10:01,409 Okay, what? I can't compliment the guy? 255 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:04,364 He's talented. You know, he's like a, a one-man operation. 256 00:10:04,389 --> 00:10:05,990 Not in my experience. 257 00:10:06,015 --> 00:10:07,850 And I think it was very nice of him 258 00:10:07,875 --> 00:10:09,408 to invite us for drinks tonight. 259 00:10:09,433 --> 00:10:11,400 - Wasn't it? - Yes, it was. It was very nice 260 00:10:11,425 --> 00:10:13,022 and I think that we should get back to him about it. 261 00:10:13,047 --> 00:10:16,287 About going to his place for "a whiskey or whatever"? 262 00:10:16,406 --> 00:10:17,940 David, I'm fine to have drinks 263 00:10:17,965 --> 00:10:20,300 - with one of your exes, okay? - Okay, first of all, 264 00:10:20,325 --> 00:10:22,662 Jake is nobody's ex and everybody's ex. 265 00:10:22,687 --> 00:10:25,686 And second of all, going to Jake's for a drink 266 00:10:25,711 --> 00:10:28,186 is never just going to Jake's for a drink. 267 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,584 Oh... oh. So you... 268 00:10:30,781 --> 00:10:33,783 okay, so you think he invited us over to... to... ? 269 00:10:34,061 --> 00:10:36,196 - Yes, I do. Yeah. - Yeah. 270 00:10:36,221 --> 00:10:37,999 Well, in that case, we definitely shouldn't go. 271 00:10:38,023 --> 00:10:40,291 'Cause we're not really the kind of couple that... 272 00:10:40,316 --> 00:10:41,842 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah... 273 00:10:42,561 --> 00:10:44,319 That being said, 274 00:10:44,582 --> 00:10:47,295 if we ever did decide to... 275 00:10:48,233 --> 00:10:50,802 have "a whiskey" with someone, 276 00:10:50,827 --> 00:10:52,756 Jake would be the person to do that with 277 00:10:52,844 --> 00:10:55,279 because he literally doesn't care about anything. 278 00:10:55,304 --> 00:10:56,905 So just... 279 00:10:56,930 --> 00:10:58,897 I'm just throwing it out there. 280 00:11:00,321 --> 00:11:02,490 I mean, we always have the option of going 281 00:11:02,515 --> 00:11:04,850 and just having a whiskey. 282 00:11:04,875 --> 00:11:07,428 Okay. And I always have the option of online shopping 283 00:11:07,453 --> 00:11:09,454 and just putting things in the cart. 284 00:11:09,479 --> 00:11:11,615 That's not gonna happen. 285 00:11:13,717 --> 00:11:16,240 Um... what's all this? 286 00:11:16,326 --> 00:11:17,860 They just keep coming. 287 00:11:18,563 --> 00:11:20,240 Well, congratulations. 288 00:11:20,265 --> 00:11:21,514 That must mean everyone's happy. 289 00:11:21,569 --> 00:11:23,170 Oh, very happy, yes. 290 00:11:23,347 --> 00:11:25,794 Thanks to your little attack of the corvidae, 291 00:11:25,819 --> 00:11:28,864 we are Interflix's number one stream of the day. 292 00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:30,623 Tied only with the fourth season 293 00:11:30,648 --> 00:11:32,148 of "Caroline in the City." 294 00:11:32,370 --> 00:11:33,990 From Interflix. 295 00:11:35,446 --> 00:11:37,084 "To Alexis, 296 00:11:37,885 --> 00:11:39,852 congratulations and thank you. 297 00:11:39,877 --> 00:11:42,346 The competition is eating crow." 298 00:11:42,648 --> 00:11:45,283 "Love, your new best friends at Interflix." 299 00:11:47,014 --> 00:11:48,287 They're all for you. 300 00:11:50,540 --> 00:11:52,441 Not those - those are from Joyce Dewitt. 301 00:11:53,056 --> 00:11:54,717 I didn't want to overwhelm you, dear, 302 00:11:54,742 --> 00:11:56,876 I know you're being pulled in another direction. 303 00:11:57,439 --> 00:12:01,141 Though, you might find a bit more delectation in this. 304 00:12:01,507 --> 00:12:04,298 No, I do. I... I just like haven't received flowers 305 00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:06,691 from someone I wasn't... friends with. 306 00:12:08,956 --> 00:12:10,456 What do I do? 307 00:12:10,481 --> 00:12:12,082 What do you want to do? 308 00:12:12,107 --> 00:12:13,929 I can't leave now. 309 00:12:13,954 --> 00:12:15,554 If you're worried about the flowers, 310 00:12:15,579 --> 00:12:17,013 they'll likely be dead in a week. 311 00:12:17,038 --> 00:12:18,572 Yeah, like my career if I walk away 312 00:12:18,597 --> 00:12:20,331 with everything that's going on. 313 00:12:20,574 --> 00:12:22,214 I've already made Ted wait an extra month. 314 00:12:22,239 --> 00:12:24,674 I can't... back out now. 315 00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:27,886 So you... you weigh your options. 316 00:12:28,227 --> 00:12:30,028 On the one hand, you are perched 317 00:12:30,053 --> 00:12:32,288 on the precipice of a dream come true 318 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:35,954 and you can jump knowing, possibly for the first time, 319 00:12:35,979 --> 00:12:37,834 that you can succeed at anything 320 00:12:37,859 --> 00:12:39,926 to which you put your mind. 321 00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:42,637 And on the other hand? 322 00:12:42,723 --> 00:12:45,158 - What other hand? - Ted! 323 00:12:45,183 --> 00:12:47,851 Dear Ted. 324 00:12:47,876 --> 00:12:49,577 Yes, this is a quandary. 325 00:12:59,449 --> 00:13:02,178 Well, things seem to be going well. 326 00:13:02,889 --> 00:13:05,181 Yeah, look, they're standing pretty close together. 327 00:13:05,206 --> 00:13:06,405 That must be a good sign. 328 00:13:06,430 --> 00:13:07,841 Yeah, and he's not crossing his arms. 329 00:13:07,866 --> 00:13:10,386 That's good body language. And... they're hugging! 330 00:13:10,411 --> 00:13:11,647 Uh-huh. 331 00:13:11,672 --> 00:13:13,606 And... now he's walking away. Okay. 332 00:13:13,850 --> 00:13:16,183 Well? How'd it go, Bob? 333 00:13:16,208 --> 00:13:18,318 It looked like you two were hitting off. 334 00:13:18,419 --> 00:13:19,753 What're the odds of... 335 00:13:19,778 --> 00:13:21,559 running into my marriage counselor here? 336 00:13:21,584 --> 00:13:23,806 I'm sorry, did you just say 337 00:13:23,831 --> 00:13:25,431 you picked up your marriage counselor? 338 00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:26,622 No. 339 00:13:26,647 --> 00:13:29,349 I'm saying she told me she can't keep seeing me. 340 00:13:29,572 --> 00:13:31,773 Apparently, there's a conflict of interest 341 00:13:31,798 --> 00:13:34,433 and, uh, she's chosen to go with Gwen. 342 00:13:34,783 --> 00:13:36,717 But... I can't blame her. 343 00:13:37,482 --> 00:13:38,882 Okay, 344 00:13:39,172 --> 00:13:41,239 can we try my system now? 345 00:13:41,426 --> 00:13:43,677 We all laugh, on the count of three, 346 00:13:43,702 --> 00:13:45,770 as if Bob just told a very funny joke. 347 00:13:45,795 --> 00:13:47,496 Oh, no pressure. 348 00:13:47,521 --> 00:13:49,545 Well, you don't actually have to tell a joke, Bob. 349 00:13:49,570 --> 00:13:51,404 Just act like you did. 350 00:13:51,429 --> 00:13:55,064 And that might attract uh... you know, someone's attention. 351 00:13:55,474 --> 00:13:56,857 What if they ask me what I said? 352 00:13:56,882 --> 00:13:58,526 Well, they're not gonna ask you what you said. 353 00:13:58,551 --> 00:14:00,018 I don't know, Johnny. 354 00:14:00,043 --> 00:14:02,076 This sounds like a really complicated plan. 355 00:14:02,152 --> 00:14:03,986 - Mm-hmm. - It couldn't be more simple. 356 00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:06,467 Just follow my lead. 357 00:14:16,936 --> 00:14:19,137 It's working. It's working. Working. 358 00:14:19,238 --> 00:14:20,872 Is something funny? 359 00:14:20,897 --> 00:14:22,431 Well, now that you mention it... 360 00:14:22,456 --> 00:14:23,951 Because it looked like you were laughing at me. 361 00:14:25,468 --> 00:14:29,334 No, It's, it's just my very available friend, Bob here, 362 00:14:29,359 --> 00:14:31,694 just said something so funny. 363 00:14:31,719 --> 00:14:34,240 - What'd you say? - You said they wouldn't ask. 364 00:14:34,265 --> 00:14:36,767 Okay, I'm not saying I'm bailing on this, 365 00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:39,518 but... I think I'm gonna go mingle and... 366 00:14:39,543 --> 00:14:41,844 I might not come back. 367 00:14:41,869 --> 00:14:44,504 It's not so much, uh, what he said, 368 00:14:44,529 --> 00:14:47,732 it was just, uh, it was a funny observation. 369 00:14:47,757 --> 00:14:50,725 Well, next time, observe someone else. 370 00:14:53,780 --> 00:14:56,335 Crrrash and burn, Johnny. 371 00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:59,362 Boy, I... I buckled under the pressure. 372 00:14:59,777 --> 00:15:02,412 But she was a dead ringer for Gwen. 373 00:15:07,065 --> 00:15:10,335 Oh, didn't know we were bringing our friends tonight. 374 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,071 'Kay, I knew I shouldn't have worn this shirt. 375 00:15:12,096 --> 00:15:13,997 No, it's nice, it's nice. Is it new? 376 00:15:14,022 --> 00:15:15,663 And does it come in an adult size? 377 00:15:15,688 --> 00:15:17,905 It's not new. I just haven't worn it yet. 378 00:15:17,930 --> 00:15:20,216 - So it is new then. - Is that cologne I smell? 379 00:15:20,241 --> 00:15:22,609 No. This is a leather-scented body moisturizer. 380 00:15:22,634 --> 00:15:25,569 So, you... you moisturized your body then. 381 00:15:27,054 --> 00:15:28,999 You know what? Why don't we not do this? 382 00:15:29,024 --> 00:15:30,424 This is getting a bit complicated. 383 00:15:30,449 --> 00:15:32,250 The only thing that's complicated here 384 00:15:32,406 --> 00:15:33,706 is the length of your sleeves. 385 00:15:33,731 --> 00:15:35,332 Go long, go short. Just pick one. 386 00:15:35,357 --> 00:15:37,820 Um, as for this? If one of us wants to leave 387 00:15:37,845 --> 00:15:39,389 and the other one wants to stay, then... 388 00:15:39,413 --> 00:15:41,648 - We both leave. - We... both leave, yeah. 389 00:15:41,673 --> 00:15:45,754 So... I think you should knock on the door 390 00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:48,714 because these arms are nice and warmed up. 391 00:15:49,539 --> 00:15:51,406 All right. 392 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:56,095 Hi, boys. 393 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,055 So glad you could make it. Come on in. 394 00:16:02,736 --> 00:16:04,022 Oh wow. 395 00:16:04,408 --> 00:16:06,543 A lot of people are here for drinks, David. 396 00:16:06,707 --> 00:16:08,107 Yeah, a few more are on their way. 397 00:16:08,175 --> 00:16:09,742 Make yourselves at home, boys. 398 00:16:09,843 --> 00:16:11,496 - Great shirt, by the way. - Aw. 399 00:16:11,521 --> 00:16:13,687 Mm-hmm. Thanks. Um... 400 00:16:14,983 --> 00:16:18,193 - We left our wine in the car. - Oh. 401 00:16:18,218 --> 00:16:19,719 So we should go get that. 402 00:16:19,820 --> 00:16:21,700 Oh, don't worry about it. Plenty of vino here. 403 00:16:21,755 --> 00:16:24,157 Yeah, it's just that ours is um... 404 00:16:25,259 --> 00:16:26,726 - kosher. - Mm. 405 00:16:26,827 --> 00:16:29,139 Well, hurry back. We're gonna start the massage circle soon. 406 00:16:29,163 --> 00:16:30,897 - Oh... - Don't wanna miss it. 407 00:16:30,998 --> 00:16:33,618 Think you're up for the massage circle? 408 00:16:33,643 --> 00:16:35,740 - This is way too many people. - Yeah. 409 00:16:35,765 --> 00:16:37,513 You have your coat. We should go. 410 00:16:37,614 --> 00:16:39,348 And... Stevie? 411 00:16:39,905 --> 00:16:41,951 Oh... my God. 412 00:16:41,976 --> 00:16:43,743 Huh. 413 00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,421 What're you doing here? 414 00:16:45,446 --> 00:16:48,933 - What're you two doing here? - We were... 415 00:16:48,958 --> 00:16:51,560 - We were just... - Invited for drinks? 416 00:16:51,937 --> 00:16:53,219 I don't know what you're talking about. 417 00:16:53,244 --> 00:16:54,511 We came here to say hi 418 00:16:54,536 --> 00:16:56,031 - and now we're leaving. - Mmhmm. 419 00:16:56,056 --> 00:16:58,324 Can I not have one thing for myself? 420 00:16:58,501 --> 00:17:00,502 No. Anyway, we're gonna go. 421 00:17:00,527 --> 00:17:01,894 You gonna come with? 422 00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:04,873 Uh... I still have like... half a drink left, 423 00:17:04,898 --> 00:17:06,785 so I think I'm gonna finish it here, and then... 424 00:17:06,810 --> 00:17:08,310 meet you guys later? 425 00:17:08,335 --> 00:17:10,169 - No, you won't. - No, I won't. 426 00:17:10,346 --> 00:17:12,047 - Okay. - Have fun. 427 00:17:12,361 --> 00:17:13,552 Bye. 428 00:17:23,259 --> 00:17:24,860 Hey, sorry I'm late. 429 00:17:24,885 --> 00:17:26,319 Myrtle was laying her eggs 430 00:17:26,344 --> 00:17:27,912 and the whole team was really excited. 431 00:17:27,937 --> 00:17:30,438 Mmm! Yeah, I bet. Fresh omelets. 432 00:17:30,646 --> 00:17:32,568 Well, Myrtle's a green sea turtle, 433 00:17:32,593 --> 00:17:34,646 and they only spawn every two years, 434 00:17:34,671 --> 00:17:36,839 so eating her eggs would actually disrupt 435 00:17:36,864 --> 00:17:38,364 an entire ecosystem. 436 00:17:38,389 --> 00:17:40,290 Plus, there's like a ton of cholesterol. 437 00:17:40,543 --> 00:17:43,223 Mm. Um, well, it sounds like you're super busy, 438 00:17:43,248 --> 00:17:45,450 so I don't wanna take up too much of your time, 439 00:17:45,886 --> 00:17:48,416 um, but I actually wanted to talk to you about something. 440 00:17:48,441 --> 00:17:50,061 I know what you're going to say, Alexis. 441 00:17:50,086 --> 00:17:52,887 - You do? - I've been dropping the ball 442 00:17:52,912 --> 00:17:54,599 when it comes to our phone dates. 443 00:17:54,624 --> 00:17:57,159 Between juggling work and, and the time difference... 444 00:17:57,184 --> 00:17:59,571 No, Ted, you haven't done anything wrong. 445 00:17:59,596 --> 00:18:01,363 We've both been so busy with work, 446 00:18:01,388 --> 00:18:03,166 and then on top of all of that, you've been... 447 00:18:03,266 --> 00:18:05,653 renovating your entire apartment for me. 448 00:18:05,678 --> 00:18:07,493 Well, I put some screens on the windows. 449 00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:09,438 I wouldn't really call it a renovation. 450 00:18:09,463 --> 00:18:11,364 Okay, well, you bought a juicer. 451 00:18:11,541 --> 00:18:14,886 Um, but the more I've been thinking about it, 452 00:18:14,911 --> 00:18:17,691 the more I feel... like... 453 00:18:17,716 --> 00:18:19,903 - I think you should stay where you are. - maybe I should stay here. 454 00:18:20,154 --> 00:18:22,622 Sorry, did, did you say something? 455 00:18:22,647 --> 00:18:25,153 No. Um... What did you say? 456 00:18:25,355 --> 00:18:27,933 I can't have you come here, Alexis. You'll hate it. 457 00:18:27,958 --> 00:18:30,950 And I'm not just saying that because the screens that I installed 458 00:18:30,975 --> 00:18:33,505 are actually attracting more bugs somehow. 459 00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:37,377 But you'd be leaving everything that you're doing to come here, 460 00:18:37,402 --> 00:18:40,502 and... I can't guarantee that there won't have another trip 461 00:18:40,527 --> 00:18:42,863 that takes me away for days at a time. 462 00:18:43,098 --> 00:18:46,533 D-don't get me wrong, I want you here so bad, 463 00:18:46,558 --> 00:18:47,804 but I know you. 464 00:18:47,829 --> 00:18:49,830 And no matter how many juicers I buy, 465 00:18:50,271 --> 00:18:52,050 this place just won't feel like home. 466 00:18:55,277 --> 00:18:58,292 Sorry. I can't tell if the screen's frozen, 467 00:18:58,317 --> 00:18:59,738 or if you're just really shocked. 468 00:18:59,778 --> 00:19:02,123 But if you still want to come, I'm not gonna tell you not to. 469 00:19:02,148 --> 00:19:04,097 No, no, no, no. Um... 470 00:19:04,122 --> 00:19:06,324 you've made some very valid points. 471 00:19:06,349 --> 00:19:08,001 Yeah. I didn't even tell you 472 00:19:08,026 --> 00:19:09,760 about the shared bathroom situation. 473 00:19:09,785 --> 00:19:12,072 Okay, well... maybe you could've led with that. 474 00:19:12,097 --> 00:19:13,829 Would've saved us some time. 475 00:19:13,854 --> 00:19:16,622 Um, but I guess we just wait it out? 476 00:19:17,277 --> 00:19:19,045 Seems like our only option. 477 00:19:19,248 --> 00:19:21,516 Yeah, until somebody invents teleportation. 478 00:19:23,331 --> 00:19:26,566 Okay, well, um... nobody's home, 479 00:19:26,839 --> 00:19:29,289 so why don't we start by teleporting you 480 00:19:29,314 --> 00:19:30,948 out of that shirt? 481 00:19:31,183 --> 00:19:32,917 That's not really how teleportation works, 482 00:19:33,018 --> 00:19:34,619 but I think that I can... 483 00:19:34,644 --> 00:19:36,745 Aww... not again! 484 00:19:36,770 --> 00:19:39,399 I'm so sorry, uh, but the ants are back 485 00:19:39,424 --> 00:19:41,459 and, uh, I think what we're about to do 486 00:19:41,484 --> 00:19:44,052 probably wouldn't end very well if a fire ant was involved. 487 00:19:44,469 --> 00:19:46,106 Um, rain check? 488 00:19:46,207 --> 00:19:47,908 Rain check. 489 00:19:47,933 --> 00:19:50,568 I love you! 490 00:19:50,593 --> 00:19:52,360 Uh, mm, oh! 491 00:19:53,572 --> 00:19:55,050 Love you. 492 00:20:02,961 --> 00:20:04,929 Hey, I'm heading out. 493 00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:06,455 Calling it a night? 494 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:09,510 Well, actually, my night is just beginning. 495 00:20:09,535 --> 00:20:12,679 Whoa... Welcome to the players' club. 496 00:20:12,704 --> 00:20:14,304 No, I'm not high-fiving that. 497 00:20:14,329 --> 00:20:16,830 Look, her name is Vanessa, 498 00:20:16,855 --> 00:20:19,018 and she has a very single, 499 00:20:19,043 --> 00:20:21,344 very attractive friend over there, 500 00:20:21,369 --> 00:20:22,500 who was just telling me about 501 00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:25,448 all the trouble she's having with her car. 502 00:20:25,473 --> 00:20:27,574 Bob, this is right up your alley. 503 00:20:27,599 --> 00:20:30,086 Nobody knows their way around cars like you. 504 00:20:30,111 --> 00:20:33,131 Yeah, I, uh, was really hoping to not talk shop. 505 00:20:33,156 --> 00:20:35,391 Bob, just go over and talk to her. 506 00:20:35,416 --> 00:20:37,284 Look, be yourself. 507 00:20:37,775 --> 00:20:40,043 Have a mint. Go, go, go, go. 508 00:20:42,452 --> 00:20:44,052 And that, gentlemen, 509 00:20:44,403 --> 00:20:46,638 is how it's done. Bye! 510 00:20:49,198 --> 00:20:51,966 You know, Roland, I do not miss being single. 511 00:20:51,991 --> 00:20:53,892 Whoa, here's to that. 512 00:20:54,326 --> 00:20:55,860 Cheers, my friend. 513 00:20:55,970 --> 00:20:58,872 Not that I didn't have fun in my day. 514 00:20:58,897 --> 00:21:00,998 They actually used to call me "the closer." 515 00:21:01,175 --> 00:21:03,143 Yeah. Well, that was probably 516 00:21:03,168 --> 00:21:05,188 because women used to close out their tabs and go home 517 00:21:05,213 --> 00:21:06,780 when you came into the bar. 518 00:21:06,805 --> 00:21:08,691 All right, speaking of closing out tabs, 519 00:21:08,716 --> 00:21:10,183 I think we should get out of here. 520 00:21:10,208 --> 00:21:12,086 Which is what the women used to say to each other 521 00:21:12,111 --> 00:21:13,839 when they saw you walking through the door. 522 00:21:13,864 --> 00:21:15,932 I'm not setting you up anymore, Roland. 523 00:21:15,957 --> 00:21:17,624 Which is that what your matchmaker said! 524 00:21:17,649 --> 00:21:19,414 Oh boy... 525 00:21:19,438 --> 00:21:24,438 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 38798

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