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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,908 --> 00:00:10,908 Subtitles by explosiveskull 2 00:00:10,910 --> 00:00:12,209 (CAR HORN HONKING) 3 00:00:12,211 --> 00:00:13,476 GIRL: Piper, let Honor drive. 4 00:00:13,478 --> 00:00:14,745 Turn off here. Turn here! 5 00:00:14,747 --> 00:00:15,946 Stop talking! I can't concentrate. 6 00:00:15,948 --> 00:00:17,848 Oh, my God! We're gonna die! 7 00:00:17,850 --> 00:00:20,416 We're not gonna... We're only going 10 miles an hour. Relax. 8 00:00:20,418 --> 00:00:23,320 Relax? We'll all be dead, so it won't even matter. 9 00:00:23,322 --> 00:00:25,788 - Stop screaming! - Just pull over. 10 00:00:25,790 --> 00:00:28,258 - (CAR HORN HONKS) - Piper, just pull over. 11 00:00:28,260 --> 00:00:29,893 Pi-Piper! 12 00:00:29,895 --> 00:00:31,831 (RADIO PLAYING MUSIC) 13 00:00:32,965 --> 00:00:34,901 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 14 00:00:37,902 --> 00:00:40,704 Well, that was a total fail. We missed the sunset. 15 00:00:40,706 --> 00:00:42,472 Isabella, this is all your fault. 16 00:00:42,474 --> 00:00:43,740 What? Me? 17 00:00:43,742 --> 00:00:44,875 We could have died. 18 00:00:44,877 --> 00:00:46,409 How are we getting home? 19 00:00:46,411 --> 00:00:48,311 We are not driving down that hill. 20 00:00:48,313 --> 00:00:50,414 - Hitchhike? - BOTH: Hitchhike?! 21 00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:52,249 Do you want us to end up 22 00:00:52,251 --> 00:00:54,685 dead on the side of the road, cut into pieces? 23 00:00:54,687 --> 00:00:56,853 Because that's what happens to hitchers. 24 00:00:56,855 --> 00:00:58,689 Oh, relax. It's L.A. County, not Tijuana. 25 00:00:58,691 --> 00:01:01,457 I'd pay money to see your face on the back of a milk carton. 26 00:01:01,459 --> 00:01:03,293 "Missing... Sophie Stephens." 27 00:01:03,295 --> 00:01:06,796 - I'll do something to your... - Oh, just try. 28 00:01:06,798 --> 00:01:08,798 I knew we should have stayed at home 29 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,634 - (TURNS UP MUSIC) - and watched "Vampire Diaries." 30 00:01:10,636 --> 00:01:12,001 Vampires are so boring. 31 00:01:12,003 --> 00:01:15,338 Oh, please. I remember when you were Team Edward, 32 00:01:15,340 --> 00:01:16,840 and don't even, because I have the photos. 33 00:01:16,842 --> 00:01:18,275 You told me that you were only 34 00:01:18,277 --> 00:01:19,643 gonna use that for your scrapbook. 35 00:01:19,645 --> 00:01:23,280 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 36 00:01:23,282 --> 00:01:27,683 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 37 00:01:27,685 --> 00:01:31,754 ♪ So for how many years have we wanted to say ♪ 38 00:01:31,756 --> 00:01:35,891 ♪ That we've said it all, there's nothing left to say? ♪ 39 00:01:35,893 --> 00:01:40,463 ♪ And for how many years have we wanted to live? ♪ 40 00:01:40,465 --> 00:01:43,700 ♪ Now we've lived it all, and everything's okay ♪ 41 00:01:43,702 --> 00:01:46,637 - ♪ Yeah, it's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 42 00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:48,804 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 43 00:01:48,806 --> 00:01:50,906 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 44 00:01:50,908 --> 00:01:53,376 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 45 00:01:53,378 --> 00:01:55,379 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 46 00:01:55,381 --> 00:01:57,881 ♪ Don't hold back, here we go ♪ 47 00:01:57,883 --> 00:02:01,551 ♪ We've got all the time, we will carry each other ♪ 48 00:02:01,553 --> 00:02:03,786 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 49 00:02:03,788 --> 00:02:06,456 ♪ I will never let you go ♪ 50 00:02:06,458 --> 00:02:10,496 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 51 00:02:22,907 --> 00:02:24,843 (MUSIC FADES) 52 00:02:27,312 --> 00:02:29,249 (FLY BUZZING) 53 00:02:31,015 --> 00:02:32,952 (CLATTERING) 54 00:02:34,953 --> 00:02:36,889 (BIRDS CHIRPING) 55 00:03:05,650 --> 00:03:08,684 MAN ON TV: Back about 200, maybe 350 years ago, 56 00:03:08,686 --> 00:03:11,387 this entire ridge was covered with water. 57 00:03:11,389 --> 00:03:13,589 You see that slow, gradual slope there. 58 00:03:13,591 --> 00:03:15,027 As it comes around, there's... 59 00:03:19,565 --> 00:03:21,501 (MUSIC PLAYING) 60 00:03:25,804 --> 00:03:28,041 - (WATER RUNNING) - ♪ You ♪ 61 00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:34,747 ♪ And I don't know why I'm not listening ♪ 62 00:03:35,813 --> 00:03:39,148 ♪ You're whispering ♪ 63 00:03:39,150 --> 00:03:42,087 ♪ Confused ♪ 64 00:03:43,589 --> 00:03:45,721 ♪ And now it's been too long ♪ 65 00:03:45,723 --> 00:03:48,992 ♪ And you're far from gone ♪ 66 00:03:48,994 --> 00:03:51,827 ♪ You're far from gone ♪ 67 00:03:51,829 --> 00:03:55,098 ♪ So why do you keep wandering ♪ 68 00:03:55,100 --> 00:03:58,402 ♪ Inside my lonely head? ♪ 69 00:03:58,404 --> 00:04:01,438 ♪ And why do I keep suffering ♪ 70 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:04,874 ♪ When all my friends said life goes on? ♪ 71 00:04:04,876 --> 00:04:11,515 ♪ Why do you keep wandering inside my lonely bed? ♪ 72 00:04:11,517 --> 00:04:14,551 ♪ And why do I keep surrendering ♪ 73 00:04:14,553 --> 00:04:18,588 ♪ When all my friends said I'll move on? ♪ 74 00:04:18,590 --> 00:04:20,557 ♪ I don't know why, don't know why ♪ 75 00:04:20,559 --> 00:04:24,194 ♪ Maybe I, maybe I made a lie ♪ 76 00:04:24,196 --> 00:04:27,631 ♪ 'Cause I don't wanna die alone ♪ 77 00:04:27,633 --> 00:04:29,801 ♪ No, I don't wanna die alone ♪ 78 00:04:31,770 --> 00:04:33,636 ♪ I don't know why, don't know why ♪ 79 00:04:33,638 --> 00:04:36,706 ♪ Maybe I, maybe I made a lie... ♪ 80 00:04:36,708 --> 00:04:39,946 What's the scoop this issue? Carcinogens in tampons? 81 00:04:44,116 --> 00:04:45,614 Eww. 82 00:04:45,616 --> 00:04:47,650 Did I say that you could come in? 83 00:04:47,652 --> 00:04:49,552 We're having breakfast. Want some? 84 00:04:49,554 --> 00:04:50,586 Eat with those two? 85 00:04:50,588 --> 00:04:52,088 No, thanks. 86 00:04:52,090 --> 00:04:53,756 Mom and Dad seem like they're getting along. 87 00:04:53,758 --> 00:04:55,862 Like the United States and China? 88 00:04:59,664 --> 00:05:00,900 Isabella... 89 00:05:01,934 --> 00:05:03,732 it's gonna be okay. 90 00:05:03,734 --> 00:05:05,167 You live 10 miles away at college, 91 00:05:05,169 --> 00:05:07,739 and you're never here, so what do you know? 92 00:05:08,974 --> 00:05:10,810 I was talking about today. 93 00:05:20,652 --> 00:05:23,853 It can seem so cruel when someone as talented, 94 00:05:23,855 --> 00:05:27,657 beautiful, and smart as Honor is taken from us. 95 00:05:27,659 --> 00:05:29,796 Man, she had it all. 96 00:05:31,095 --> 00:05:32,862 She was looking forward to her scholarship 97 00:05:32,864 --> 00:05:36,198 at the Royal Ballet School in London next year. 98 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:40,472 But Honor knew the future was not guaranteed. 99 00:05:41,607 --> 00:05:43,038 Because of her heart condition, 100 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:46,643 Honor lived every day to the fullest. 101 00:05:46,645 --> 00:05:50,547 So today, join me in remembering 102 00:05:50,549 --> 00:05:54,783 the wonderful young woman that was Honor Liang. 103 00:05:54,785 --> 00:05:56,552 Let us pray. 104 00:05:56,554 --> 00:05:59,122 Lord, we pray for those who mourn, 105 00:05:59,124 --> 00:06:01,590 parents and children, friends and neighbors. 106 00:06:01,592 --> 00:06:02,691 Have you seen Piper? 107 00:06:02,693 --> 00:06:04,059 - Be gentle with them... - No. 108 00:06:04,061 --> 00:06:05,728 in their grief. 109 00:06:05,730 --> 00:06:09,598 Spare them the torment of guilt and despair. 110 00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:11,470 (MUFFLED) Be with them... 111 00:06:14,573 --> 00:06:19,174 ...of our risen Savior, Jesus Christ, our Lord. 112 00:06:19,176 --> 00:06:20,712 Amen. 113 00:06:24,816 --> 00:06:26,751 (SOFT OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 114 00:06:47,338 --> 00:06:49,274 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) 115 00:06:55,212 --> 00:06:57,282 What if Honor died a virgin? 116 00:06:58,749 --> 00:07:01,184 You know, I never thought about that. 117 00:07:01,186 --> 00:07:03,252 You think she was? 118 00:07:03,254 --> 00:07:04,556 I don't know. 119 00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:16,032 Thanks. 120 00:07:16,034 --> 00:07:19,035 You were in my history class first year. 121 00:07:19,037 --> 00:07:21,140 Sophie, right? 122 00:07:22,607 --> 00:07:24,075 I'm... I'm Aaron. 123 00:07:26,744 --> 00:07:30,246 You invented the Worth the Wait app, right? 124 00:07:30,248 --> 00:07:31,915 Mm-hmm. 125 00:07:31,917 --> 00:07:33,316 So, what, does it, like, 126 00:07:33,318 --> 00:07:36,052 send you a warning message or something 127 00:07:36,054 --> 00:07:40,389 before you, you know, send a sexy message? 128 00:07:40,391 --> 00:07:43,059 (SIGHS) That's correct. Yeah. 129 00:07:43,061 --> 00:07:44,162 Cool. 130 00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:48,331 Cool. 131 00:07:48,333 --> 00:07:50,268 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 132 00:07:54,905 --> 00:07:58,276 Honor's favorite things, they'll be burned with her. 133 00:08:36,815 --> 00:08:38,150 Piper? 134 00:08:45,356 --> 00:08:48,692 Hi, Mrs. Walker, Mr. Walker. 135 00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:53,866 Piper. It's nice to see you, despite the circumstances. 136 00:09:03,441 --> 00:09:04,909 Excuse me. 137 00:09:06,978 --> 00:09:09,112 Sorry they're still so weird around you. 138 00:09:09,114 --> 00:09:10,979 It's okay. 139 00:09:10,981 --> 00:09:13,315 How are you otherwise? 140 00:09:13,317 --> 00:09:15,885 You... You look really good. 141 00:09:15,887 --> 00:09:16,821 (CHUCKLES) 142 00:09:18,290 --> 00:09:20,756 Thanks, but I'm just gonna ignore the fact 143 00:09:20,758 --> 00:09:22,291 that you're flirting with me at Honor's wake. 144 00:09:22,293 --> 00:09:25,227 And, uh, I won't mention what's in your cup. 145 00:09:25,229 --> 00:09:27,764 Oh, no. It's not what you think. 146 00:09:27,766 --> 00:09:30,436 Um, I'm gonna go talk to Mrs. Liang. 147 00:09:33,772 --> 00:09:34,871 Mrs. Liang. 148 00:09:34,873 --> 00:09:35,941 Mrs. Liang. 149 00:09:44,850 --> 00:09:46,185 So... 150 00:09:48,186 --> 00:09:49,721 So? 151 00:09:55,127 --> 00:09:56,859 How was the funeral? 152 00:09:56,861 --> 00:09:58,127 What do you think? 153 00:09:58,129 --> 00:09:59,529 It was a blast. 154 00:09:59,531 --> 00:10:02,431 The eulogy from Honor's dad was very moving. 155 00:10:02,433 --> 00:10:06,035 It was great to see so many people turn out. 156 00:10:06,037 --> 00:10:09,038 Everything was really nice. 157 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,806 Can't wait to have a nice funeral. 158 00:10:10,808 --> 00:10:12,775 Well, you're about as depressing as one. 159 00:10:12,777 --> 00:10:15,111 At least I was there. Where were you? 160 00:10:15,113 --> 00:10:16,979 Couldn't find the right Jimmy Choos? 161 00:10:16,981 --> 00:10:18,915 Funerals aren't cool enough for you? 162 00:10:18,917 --> 00:10:21,251 Stop. What is wrong with you guys? 163 00:10:21,253 --> 00:10:22,986 Our best friend died, 164 00:10:22,988 --> 00:10:26,425 our best friend back when we were all best friends! 165 00:10:32,397 --> 00:10:34,233 Mmm. 166 00:10:38,003 --> 00:10:40,306 It'll be like we're having one with her. 167 00:10:42,507 --> 00:10:44,107 You know, these are Honor's cigarettes. 168 00:10:44,109 --> 00:10:47,075 I found them under her bed. They're not stale, 169 00:10:47,077 --> 00:10:50,148 so I think she was smoking them up until she, um... 170 00:10:51,282 --> 00:10:52,848 she died. 171 00:10:52,850 --> 00:10:54,953 Did you know she was smoking? 172 00:10:56,253 --> 00:10:58,324 Oh, I... I did not tell her dad. 173 00:11:00,358 --> 00:11:04,093 (COUGHS) 174 00:11:04,095 --> 00:11:06,963 Now I wish I'd let her do everything she wanted to do. 175 00:11:06,965 --> 00:11:09,933 You know, there are so many rules. 176 00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:11,934 Ballet's no joke with the... 177 00:11:11,936 --> 00:11:15,140 the discipline and the dieting and... 178 00:11:18,143 --> 00:11:21,544 I, um, I went through all that, but I quit. 179 00:11:21,546 --> 00:11:23,883 You know, I didn't want Honor to, um... 180 00:11:28,519 --> 00:11:30,121 But now... 181 00:11:33,457 --> 00:11:36,294 Now it doesn't matter, so... 182 00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:41,300 So... 183 00:11:44,002 --> 00:11:46,035 I'm gonna let her do what she wants to do 184 00:11:46,037 --> 00:11:47,406 with this one last thing. 185 00:11:50,307 --> 00:11:54,410 She left last wishes for everyone she loved. 186 00:11:54,412 --> 00:11:56,348 She left ones for you. 187 00:11:58,148 --> 00:12:00,983 You all made a... a list together, right, 188 00:12:00,985 --> 00:12:03,086 a bucket list or something? 189 00:12:03,088 --> 00:12:04,587 Yeah. That's right. 190 00:12:04,589 --> 00:12:06,521 Yeah. Well, Honor wants you 191 00:12:06,523 --> 00:12:08,558 to do all those things on that list, 192 00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:12,431 uh, before graduation, just like you planned. 193 00:12:18,503 --> 00:12:21,239 Piper. Hey! 194 00:12:22,507 --> 00:12:24,674 Don't ever speak for me. 195 00:12:24,676 --> 00:12:26,041 Who do you think you are? 196 00:12:26,043 --> 00:12:27,510 You should have asked, Piper. 197 00:12:27,512 --> 00:12:29,411 I can't do the list. I can't drop everything. 198 00:12:29,413 --> 00:12:30,612 Okay, you two just shut up. 199 00:12:30,614 --> 00:12:32,080 We're not actually doing the list. 200 00:12:32,082 --> 00:12:33,583 You just said that we... 201 00:12:33,585 --> 00:12:35,019 You saw how upset Mrs. Liang was. 202 00:12:36,354 --> 00:12:38,021 So you lied? 203 00:12:38,023 --> 00:12:39,624 Wow. 204 00:12:41,158 --> 00:12:42,628 She'll never know. 205 00:12:46,697 --> 00:12:49,064 HONOR: Piper, stop making that face. 206 00:12:49,066 --> 00:12:50,232 What face? That's my real face. 207 00:12:50,234 --> 00:12:52,334 It should be its own emoji. 208 00:12:52,336 --> 00:12:53,670 No! 209 00:12:53,672 --> 00:12:57,272 You're gonna get water up my nose. 210 00:12:57,274 --> 00:12:58,942 Oh! Eww! Eww! 211 00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:00,476 Go away, Dillon. Go away. 212 00:13:00,478 --> 00:13:02,411 Okay, guys, come on. Hurry up. 213 00:13:02,413 --> 00:13:04,046 - Get out of the shot. - One, two... 214 00:13:04,048 --> 00:13:05,982 Dillon, move. 215 00:13:05,984 --> 00:13:07,449 - Get over here, Tchaikovsky. - Come in. Come on. 216 00:13:07,451 --> 00:13:08,888 - I'll take it. - Come on, Honor. 217 00:13:11,422 --> 00:13:12,622 We're such a perfect 218 00:13:12,624 --> 00:13:14,390 ethnically layered sandwich right now. 219 00:13:14,392 --> 00:13:16,159 Yeah, like a tampon commercial. 220 00:13:16,161 --> 00:13:17,459 Oh, I love you guys. 221 00:13:17,461 --> 00:13:19,695 Okay, say, "Monkey butt." 222 00:13:19,697 --> 00:13:22,064 Monkey butt! 223 00:13:22,066 --> 00:13:24,003 (LAUGHING) 224 00:13:33,077 --> 00:13:34,479 You ready? 225 00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:37,349 - Ready? - Yeah. 226 00:13:38,649 --> 00:13:41,019 (ALL SCREAM) 227 00:13:48,258 --> 00:13:49,994 Tie it tight. 228 00:13:51,196 --> 00:13:53,096 - I'm gonna count to 30. - Okay. 229 00:13:53,098 --> 00:13:55,430 And if you don't come up, I am pulling that rope. 230 00:13:55,432 --> 00:13:57,000 - Ready? - Okay. 231 00:13:57,002 --> 00:13:59,769 Here I go. (INHALES) 232 00:13:59,771 --> 00:14:03,539 1, 2, 3, 233 00:14:03,541 --> 00:14:07,743 4, 5, 6, 234 00:14:07,745 --> 00:14:12,214 7, 8, 9, 235 00:14:12,216 --> 00:14:17,020 10, 11, 12... 236 00:14:17,022 --> 00:14:18,958 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 237 00:14:35,407 --> 00:14:37,242 Can't believe she's gone. 238 00:14:38,409 --> 00:14:40,142 Why? 239 00:14:40,144 --> 00:14:42,578 What do you mean, "Why?" 240 00:14:42,580 --> 00:14:44,646 You weren't friends. 241 00:14:44,648 --> 00:14:47,152 Yeah, but she was cool. 242 00:14:49,186 --> 00:14:52,088 So are we still on for spray tans after school? 243 00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:55,157 Hell, yeah. I am as white as a polar bear's butt crack. 244 00:14:55,159 --> 00:14:56,394 (LAUGHS) 245 00:15:00,297 --> 00:15:02,267 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 246 00:15:05,670 --> 00:15:07,402 On behalf of the Morrisettes, 247 00:15:07,404 --> 00:15:09,805 Krissy and I are organizing a charity basketball fundraiser 248 00:15:09,807 --> 00:15:12,442 for the Heart Rescue Project in Honor's name. 249 00:15:12,444 --> 00:15:14,444 Get your tickets. 250 00:15:14,446 --> 00:15:15,745 Honor's midnight vigil 251 00:15:15,747 --> 00:15:18,180 should have a sense of integrity, class, 252 00:15:18,182 --> 00:15:19,848 definitely a U2 cover. 253 00:15:19,850 --> 00:15:21,684 Hey, Piper, um, 254 00:15:21,686 --> 00:15:23,352 I know you weren't really friends with Honor, 255 00:15:23,354 --> 00:15:25,088 but I just made a Remember Honor page. 256 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:26,555 Since you're Class President, could you, you know, 257 00:15:26,557 --> 00:15:28,458 like, share, let people know about it? 258 00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:30,293 Make the background color pink. 259 00:15:30,295 --> 00:15:31,764 Pink was her favorite color. 260 00:15:33,230 --> 00:15:35,231 For Honor's locker, 261 00:15:35,233 --> 00:15:38,436 out of respect for her Japanese heritage. 262 00:15:50,882 --> 00:15:52,681 I think we should find the time capsule 263 00:15:52,683 --> 00:15:53,882 and do the list. 264 00:15:53,884 --> 00:15:55,318 There's no we, Piper. 265 00:15:55,320 --> 00:15:56,618 If we were such good friends, 266 00:15:56,620 --> 00:15:58,487 why didn't she tell us that she was sick? 267 00:15:58,489 --> 00:16:01,656 - (P.A. CHIMES) - Good morning, students. 268 00:16:01,658 --> 00:16:04,760 Principal Logan would like to start the day with a few words. 269 00:16:04,762 --> 00:16:07,130 We're going to take a schoolwide moment of silence 270 00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:09,232 in remembrance of Honor Liang. 271 00:16:09,234 --> 00:16:11,233 And while we take a moment to reflect on Honor 272 00:16:11,235 --> 00:16:12,801 and what she meant to the school, 273 00:16:12,803 --> 00:16:16,405 we're going to play her favorite song to dance to, 274 00:16:16,407 --> 00:16:19,174 Bach's Third Orchestral Suite. 275 00:16:19,176 --> 00:16:21,647 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) 276 00:16:24,148 --> 00:16:26,415 She would have danced to the Weeknd over Bach any day. 277 00:16:26,417 --> 00:16:28,550 She hated pink. Her favorite color was purple. 278 00:16:28,552 --> 00:16:29,718 Have you seen her locker? 279 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:31,386 Yeah. It looks like a fairy threw up. 280 00:16:31,388 --> 00:16:32,655 Don't get me started. 281 00:16:32,657 --> 00:16:34,423 And what's with all that origami shit? 282 00:16:34,425 --> 00:16:36,758 She wasn't even Japanese. Her family's from Taiwan. 283 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:40,663 Yesterday Honor's mom said we knew her and no one else did. 284 00:16:40,665 --> 00:16:43,532 I mean, it's true. We did. 285 00:16:43,534 --> 00:16:45,367 So I have to do this list, 286 00:16:45,369 --> 00:16:48,273 and if you loved her, you'll do it with me. 287 00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:53,112 (MUSIC PLAYING) 288 00:17:08,525 --> 00:17:11,560 I told you we should have gone home first for our suits. 289 00:17:11,562 --> 00:17:13,232 Looks like the rope is still there. 290 00:17:14,365 --> 00:17:16,331 Bet you I find it first. 291 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:17,399 What do you wanna bet? 292 00:17:17,401 --> 00:17:19,534 There's a boat right there. 293 00:17:19,536 --> 00:17:21,537 Knowing I beat you is the only reward I need. 294 00:17:21,539 --> 00:17:22,508 You're on. 295 00:17:35,786 --> 00:17:37,722 (BOTH YELLING) 296 00:17:40,324 --> 00:17:41,259 Oh, my God! 297 00:17:42,426 --> 00:17:43,661 Oh, my God! 298 00:17:44,795 --> 00:17:46,398 Stop kicking water in my face! 299 00:17:55,773 --> 00:17:56,742 (YELLS) 300 00:18:00,511 --> 00:18:01,711 - I found it. - (GROANS) 301 00:18:01,713 --> 00:18:03,445 Kiss my ass. 302 00:18:03,447 --> 00:18:04,582 Help. 303 00:18:09,286 --> 00:18:12,655 Oh, "Free Mo" from when I did that PETA march. 304 00:18:12,657 --> 00:18:13,591 (LAUGHS) 305 00:18:15,859 --> 00:18:17,693 Cotton candy? 306 00:18:17,695 --> 00:18:20,363 No, it was an act of political resistance. 307 00:18:20,365 --> 00:18:22,565 - What? - Remember when Isabella 308 00:18:22,567 --> 00:18:25,268 grew out her armpit hair and dyed it pink? 309 00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:27,470 Oh, my God. Eww. Eww. Eww. 310 00:18:27,472 --> 00:18:28,874 - You're so gross. - Eww. 311 00:18:31,475 --> 00:18:33,776 "Get into the Royal School of Ballet." 312 00:18:33,778 --> 00:18:38,717 Well, she got in, just never got to go. 313 00:18:44,321 --> 00:18:45,988 Okay, let's not get all gloomy. 314 00:18:45,990 --> 00:18:48,560 Just do this, and get it over with. 315 00:18:52,496 --> 00:18:53,931 I mean, let's do the list for Honor. 316 00:19:01,406 --> 00:19:02,905 I can only read six. 317 00:19:02,907 --> 00:19:04,643 Six is easy, right? 318 00:19:08,045 --> 00:19:11,513 Some... Something "break"? 319 00:19:11,515 --> 00:19:13,616 Outbreak? 320 00:19:13,618 --> 00:19:14,817 Jailbreak? 321 00:19:14,819 --> 00:19:16,719 - Jailbreak Mo. - That's right. 322 00:19:16,721 --> 00:19:18,687 You used to make us go to pet stores 323 00:19:18,689 --> 00:19:20,388 and unleash all the parakeets. 324 00:19:20,390 --> 00:19:21,589 Oh, yeah. 325 00:19:21,591 --> 00:19:23,492 Wait. So are you still vegetarian? 326 00:19:23,494 --> 00:19:24,592 Yeah. 327 00:19:24,594 --> 00:19:27,365 Impressive, vegetarian virgin. 328 00:19:29,766 --> 00:19:32,835 ♪ We pledge thee our loyalty ♪ 329 00:19:32,837 --> 00:19:35,037 ♪ Go, Mo, go, Mo ♪ 330 00:19:35,039 --> 00:19:37,373 Why is our mascot a goat? 331 00:19:37,375 --> 00:19:41,444 I mean, shouldn't it be, like, a dolphin or a narwhal? 332 00:19:41,446 --> 00:19:43,945 I mean, we're the Mariners, not the Capricorns. 333 00:19:43,947 --> 00:19:47,616 Okay, Mo is, like, under high security. 334 00:19:47,618 --> 00:19:49,385 Coach Johnson is obsessed with him. 335 00:19:49,387 --> 00:19:51,486 Oh, yeah. He keeps Mo locked up, doesn't he? 336 00:19:51,488 --> 00:19:53,856 - Mm-hmm. - So we just need keys. 337 00:19:53,858 --> 00:19:55,023 Who do we know? 338 00:19:55,025 --> 00:19:57,626 You're the popular one. 339 00:19:57,628 --> 00:19:59,462 Oh, no, God. 340 00:19:59,464 --> 00:20:01,563 Only people who aren't popular use the word "popular." 341 00:20:01,565 --> 00:20:03,668 - You outted me. - (MOCKING) 342 00:20:05,102 --> 00:20:06,969 Okay, well, we must know somebody. 343 00:20:06,971 --> 00:20:09,374 Uh, who's the guy that's the mascot? 344 00:20:10,541 --> 00:20:12,577 (FUNK MUSIC PLAYING) 345 00:20:15,847 --> 00:20:18,513 ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 346 00:20:18,515 --> 00:20:21,082 ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 347 00:20:21,084 --> 00:20:23,853 ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 348 00:20:23,855 --> 00:20:26,121 - ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ - (APP WHISTLES) 349 00:20:26,123 --> 00:20:28,857 ♪ I'm not ready to kiss and hug ♪ 350 00:20:28,859 --> 00:20:31,092 ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 351 00:20:31,094 --> 00:20:33,995 ♪ I'm not ready to sit at home ♪ 352 00:20:33,997 --> 00:20:35,731 - ♪ And wait for you ♪ - (WHISTLE) 353 00:20:35,733 --> 00:20:37,566 ♪ To find the phone, I'm not ready ♪ 354 00:20:37,568 --> 00:20:39,667 - (WHISTLES) - ♪ No, no, baby ♪ 355 00:20:39,669 --> 00:20:41,569 ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 356 00:20:41,571 --> 00:20:43,905 - ♪ I'm not ready ♪ - ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 357 00:20:43,907 --> 00:20:46,709 - ♪ Oh, sugar ♪ - ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 358 00:20:46,711 --> 00:20:49,544 ♪ I'm not ready to fight that fight ♪ 359 00:20:49,546 --> 00:20:52,147 ♪ I'm not ready to cry all night ♪ 360 00:20:52,149 --> 00:20:54,683 ♪ Love is the thing I'm not ready to face ♪ 361 00:20:54,685 --> 00:20:56,851 ♪ So you just gotta go your way ♪ 362 00:20:56,853 --> 00:20:59,422 - ♪ I'm not ready ♪ - ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ 363 00:20:59,424 --> 00:21:00,790 - Agh! Gaah! - ♪ Ah, baby ♪ 364 00:21:00,792 --> 00:21:02,191 - ♪ I'm not ready for love ♪ - (GROANS) 365 00:21:02,193 --> 00:21:06,162 ♪ Ready, ah, no, no, not ready ♪ 366 00:21:06,164 --> 00:21:08,696 I hope you don't get in trouble for this, Aaron. 367 00:21:08,698 --> 00:21:10,067 I've been the mascot for two years, 368 00:21:11,099 --> 00:21:12,100 and I've never seen Mo in his natural element. 369 00:21:12,102 --> 00:21:13,935 He deserves a night of freedom. 370 00:21:13,937 --> 00:21:15,538 - (CHUCKLES) - It's almost 10:00. 371 00:21:15,540 --> 00:21:16,571 Where's Piper? 372 00:21:16,573 --> 00:21:18,139 BOY: Later, babe. 373 00:21:18,141 --> 00:21:20,077 (CAR DRIVES AWAY) 374 00:21:21,545 --> 00:21:22,711 Oh, my God. 375 00:21:22,713 --> 00:21:24,613 (SNICKERS) 376 00:21:24,615 --> 00:21:27,982 (LAUGHS) Where's the goat? 377 00:21:27,984 --> 00:21:29,784 Of course you had to show up wasted. 378 00:21:29,786 --> 00:21:31,553 I am not wasted. 379 00:21:31,555 --> 00:21:32,890 You're wasted. 380 00:21:37,861 --> 00:21:40,930 (DOOR CREAKS) 381 00:21:40,932 --> 00:21:42,530 (SNIFFING) 382 00:21:42,532 --> 00:21:43,632 - Ugh. - Eww. 383 00:21:43,634 --> 00:21:45,533 AARON: Yeah, you get used to that. 384 00:21:45,535 --> 00:21:47,735 - What is it? - Urine. 385 00:21:47,737 --> 00:21:49,938 Oh, speaking of, I have to cop a squat. 386 00:21:49,940 --> 00:21:52,074 Bucks pee on their entire faces, 387 00:21:52,076 --> 00:21:54,609 like their whole beard and chest area. 388 00:21:54,611 --> 00:21:55,743 Kinky. 389 00:21:55,745 --> 00:21:57,011 You would take it there. 390 00:21:57,013 --> 00:21:58,713 It's actually very natural. 391 00:21:58,715 --> 00:22:01,549 That's right. The, uh, does find it irresistible. 392 00:22:01,551 --> 00:22:03,519 (URINATING) 393 00:22:03,521 --> 00:22:04,986 Mo looks pretty content. 394 00:22:04,988 --> 00:22:06,856 - You sure he wants to be free? - (BLEATING) 395 00:22:06,858 --> 00:22:09,558 You try living in captivity for your entire life. 396 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:11,260 Of course he does. 397 00:22:11,262 --> 00:22:12,627 All right, Mo. 398 00:22:12,629 --> 00:22:14,797 Door's open. Be free. 399 00:22:14,799 --> 00:22:17,265 Come on, Mo. We're trying to set you free. 400 00:22:17,267 --> 00:22:20,536 It's time to roam wild. 401 00:22:20,538 --> 00:22:23,137 Come here, Mo. I have some yummy grass for you can eat. 402 00:22:23,139 --> 00:22:24,772 I think that's fertilized. 403 00:22:24,774 --> 00:22:26,242 No, no, he'll die. He can't eat that. 404 00:22:26,244 --> 00:22:27,609 No, no, goats can eat anything. 405 00:22:27,611 --> 00:22:29,244 I saw one eat a whole tin can once. 406 00:22:29,246 --> 00:22:31,012 - That's a cartoon, Piper. - I think I know the one. 407 00:22:31,014 --> 00:22:32,714 Okay, but let me just go grab him. 408 00:22:32,716 --> 00:22:34,884 How about you let someone who can stand upright do this? 409 00:22:34,886 --> 00:22:37,022 - Come on, Mo. - You can do it. 410 00:22:41,157 --> 00:22:44,092 Free Mo, and end animal mascot cruelty! 411 00:22:44,094 --> 00:22:46,729 After years of severe trauma 412 00:22:46,731 --> 00:22:49,831 by the noise, crowds, chaos of games, 413 00:22:49,833 --> 00:22:53,001 and not to mention being forced to ride on a boat, 414 00:22:53,003 --> 00:22:54,505 Mo is free. 415 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:58,574 - (BLEATING) - (LAUGHS) 416 00:22:58,576 --> 00:23:00,075 Free Mo! 417 00:23:00,077 --> 00:23:02,547 - (LAUGHTER) - It's not funny, you guys. 418 00:23:04,148 --> 00:23:06,682 - This is so lame. - Oh. Yeah. 419 00:23:06,684 --> 00:23:08,216 (BALLAD PLAYING) 420 00:23:08,218 --> 00:23:11,819 Do you like this song or something a bit more upbeat? 421 00:23:11,821 --> 00:23:13,588 Does the top go up? 422 00:23:13,590 --> 00:23:15,057 No. It's broken. 423 00:23:15,059 --> 00:23:18,860 I just keep praying it doesn't rain. (LAUGHS) 424 00:23:18,862 --> 00:23:20,261 H-How about this song? 425 00:23:20,263 --> 00:23:21,829 - (ROCK-'N'-ROLL PLAYING) - Uh, yeah, sure. 426 00:23:21,831 --> 00:23:23,566 Can you turn it down a little? 427 00:23:23,568 --> 00:23:25,503 (LOWERS VOLUME) 428 00:23:28,673 --> 00:23:30,673 What's wrong? 429 00:23:30,675 --> 00:23:33,043 Don't you wanna be seen with me? 430 00:23:34,712 --> 00:23:37,146 No, yeah, it... 431 00:23:37,148 --> 00:23:38,550 it's just that... 432 00:23:40,283 --> 00:23:42,651 you know, I-I'm a girl, 433 00:23:42,653 --> 00:23:47,088 and you're a guy, and it's late, and I just... 434 00:23:47,090 --> 00:23:50,358 I just don't want anyone to think we're... 435 00:23:50,360 --> 00:23:53,665 Right. You have an image to keep up. 436 00:23:55,265 --> 00:23:58,901 So when did you decide you wanted to wait till marriage? 437 00:23:58,903 --> 00:24:02,738 Freshman year, when I started Worth the Wait. 438 00:24:02,740 --> 00:24:05,076 - Why? - I made a pact with someone. 439 00:24:06,343 --> 00:24:09,211 Oh, like, with a guy? 440 00:24:09,213 --> 00:24:11,146 No, not like that. 441 00:24:11,148 --> 00:24:12,783 Just a friend. 442 00:24:16,721 --> 00:24:17,886 I have an idea. 443 00:24:17,888 --> 00:24:19,621 (POP MUSIC PLAYING) 444 00:24:19,623 --> 00:24:21,790 ♪ I ♪ 445 00:24:21,792 --> 00:24:24,728 - (WHOOPING) - ♪ Don't wanna be too cool ♪ 446 00:24:27,398 --> 00:24:29,764 This is so much fun! 447 00:24:29,766 --> 00:24:30,832 (LAUGHS) 448 00:24:30,834 --> 00:24:33,938 ♪ I don't wanna be... ♪ 449 00:24:38,274 --> 00:24:39,643 (MUSIC AND ENGINE STOP) 450 00:24:57,028 --> 00:25:02,865 Um, actually I... I want to tell you something. 451 00:25:02,867 --> 00:25:04,836 Could you put this back on? 452 00:25:08,004 --> 00:25:11,373 I... I just feel like I might actually tell you 453 00:25:11,375 --> 00:25:13,942 if I pretend I'm talking to Mo. 454 00:25:13,944 --> 00:25:15,309 You talk to Mo? 455 00:25:15,311 --> 00:25:17,111 Sometimes. 456 00:25:17,113 --> 00:25:19,048 Do you think that's confusing for him, 457 00:25:19,050 --> 00:25:20,851 because I'm like his alter ego or... 458 00:25:21,985 --> 00:25:23,287 Anyway, uh... 459 00:25:25,423 --> 00:25:27,125 here it goes. 460 00:25:30,794 --> 00:25:32,397 I'm a virgin, too. 461 00:25:34,965 --> 00:25:38,003 Not by choice, exactly, but, yeah, I've never done it, so... 462 00:25:40,838 --> 00:25:44,109 maybe we're not so different from each other? 463 00:25:53,184 --> 00:25:54,985 Can I see your ring? 464 00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:57,321 Yeah. 465 00:25:58,888 --> 00:25:59,823 Pretty. 466 00:26:07,398 --> 00:26:09,234 Thank you. 467 00:26:27,417 --> 00:26:29,784 (STEREO PLAYING MUSIC) 468 00:26:29,786 --> 00:26:31,086 (HONOR CHUCKLES) 469 00:26:31,088 --> 00:26:32,820 (GASPS) 470 00:26:32,822 --> 00:26:35,857 O.M.G. Eww! 471 00:26:35,859 --> 00:26:37,859 Is that what they look like? 472 00:26:37,861 --> 00:26:40,194 Wait. What? Wait. You've never seen one before? 473 00:26:40,196 --> 00:26:41,864 - No. - (SQUEALS) 474 00:26:41,866 --> 00:26:43,030 It's so angry-looking. 475 00:26:43,032 --> 00:26:45,032 Ugh. I know. (SQUEALS) 476 00:26:45,034 --> 00:26:47,168 - (CELLPHONE CHIMES) - Wait. 477 00:26:47,170 --> 00:26:49,271 He wants me to send him nudes. 478 00:26:49,273 --> 00:26:50,772 ♪ One in a million ♪ 479 00:26:50,774 --> 00:26:53,244 ♪ Yeah, I'm one in a million ♪ 480 00:26:55,111 --> 00:26:56,878 - (LAUGHS) - ♪ I burned a bridge ♪ 481 00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:58,813 ♪ And I got out of town ♪ 482 00:26:58,815 --> 00:27:01,049 ♪ Whispered winds pulled me in ♪ 483 00:27:01,051 --> 00:27:03,484 - ♪ Now I'm not coming down... ♪ - (LAUGHS) 484 00:27:03,486 --> 00:27:06,256 Wait. What did you just do? 485 00:27:07,891 --> 00:27:10,058 Oh, I'm just kidding. 486 00:27:10,060 --> 00:27:11,960 I sent him a picture of my granddad 487 00:27:11,962 --> 00:27:14,163 when he went to the beach and lost his Speedos. 488 00:27:14,165 --> 00:27:16,234 (BOTH LAUGH) 489 00:27:17,301 --> 00:27:19,233 Oh, my God. Eww. 490 00:27:19,235 --> 00:27:22,236 ♪ Don't make me feel like ♪ 491 00:27:22,238 --> 00:27:24,438 ♪ I've never known life ♪ 492 00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,308 ♪ I'm one in a million ♪ 493 00:27:26,310 --> 00:27:28,976 ♪ Yeah, I'm one in a million ♪ 494 00:27:28,978 --> 00:27:32,280 ♪ Baby, you feel like I've never known life... ♪ 495 00:27:32,282 --> 00:27:34,515 You know, when I was dating Antony, 496 00:27:34,517 --> 00:27:38,252 he pressured me all the time. 497 00:27:38,254 --> 00:27:43,125 He told me that if I wanted to kiss and hug, 498 00:27:43,127 --> 00:27:45,092 we'd have to do it first. 499 00:27:45,094 --> 00:27:48,129 I-Is that why you broke up with him? 500 00:27:48,131 --> 00:27:50,866 (SIGHS) 501 00:27:50,868 --> 00:27:51,867 (GROANS) 502 00:27:51,869 --> 00:27:53,167 It's so stupid. 503 00:27:53,169 --> 00:27:56,437 Like, why does it always have to be about sex? 504 00:27:56,439 --> 00:27:57,875 I know. 505 00:28:02,446 --> 00:28:06,216 Why don't we make a pact to stay virgins? 506 00:28:09,887 --> 00:28:11,220 Really? 507 00:28:11,222 --> 00:28:14,058 Yeah. It's us versus the whole school. 508 00:28:15,592 --> 00:28:18,329 Let's wait to have sex until we're married. 509 00:28:19,597 --> 00:28:21,363 Or at least engaged. 510 00:28:21,365 --> 00:28:23,201 (BOTH LAUGH) 511 00:28:32,475 --> 00:28:35,010 PIPER: Do you see any chicks up here? 512 00:28:35,012 --> 00:28:36,878 Yeah, there's no way we can do this. 513 00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:38,180 That's sexist. 514 00:28:38,182 --> 00:28:40,915 Yeah, totally sexist, but true. 515 00:28:40,917 --> 00:28:43,351 I've researched competitive eating. 516 00:28:43,353 --> 00:28:46,088 If we stand up, it'll give us more room for food. 517 00:28:46,090 --> 00:28:48,322 If we dunk each slice into water, 518 00:28:48,324 --> 00:28:50,358 it'll lubricate the pizza going down our throats. 519 00:28:50,360 --> 00:28:53,095 Ugh. Yeah, no, I'm pretty sure I'm allergic to garlic. 520 00:28:53,097 --> 00:28:55,897 I'm lactose intolerant, but I'm still doing this. 521 00:28:55,899 --> 00:28:57,067 Yeah, I'm just not sure. 522 00:28:58,099 --> 00:28:58,666 What, you're too afraid 523 00:28:58,668 --> 00:29:01,403 to desecrate your perfect online image? 524 00:29:01,405 --> 00:29:02,604 No, I don't care about that. 525 00:29:02,606 --> 00:29:04,373 Sure. 526 00:29:04,375 --> 00:29:06,074 Think of Honor. 527 00:29:06,076 --> 00:29:09,043 Her whole life was grapefruits and hard-boiled eggs. 528 00:29:09,045 --> 00:29:10,981 (SONG IN ITALIAN PLAYING) 529 00:29:14,618 --> 00:29:16,186 (SCOFFS) 530 00:29:19,255 --> 00:29:23,224 Uh, we're here for the Big Mama & Papa's Pizza challenge. 531 00:29:23,226 --> 00:29:24,559 Perfecto. 532 00:29:24,561 --> 00:29:27,365 First we need you to challenge another group. 533 00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:31,299 We choose them. 534 00:29:31,301 --> 00:29:32,337 Seriously? 535 00:29:37,975 --> 00:29:39,508 - (SIGHS) - Boom. 536 00:29:39,510 --> 00:29:40,509 Boom. 537 00:29:40,511 --> 00:29:42,176 - Pow. - Yeah. 538 00:29:42,178 --> 00:29:44,578 - Yeah, I don't know. - Think is gonna be okay. 539 00:29:44,580 --> 00:29:47,415 Bathroom is back there. Okay. 540 00:29:47,417 --> 00:29:50,385 You have one hour to finish these pizzas. 541 00:29:50,387 --> 00:29:52,687 Let's make history, girls. 542 00:29:52,689 --> 00:29:56,157 I mean, I'm on my period, so I've got this. 543 00:29:56,159 --> 00:29:58,327 Pronte, attente, via. 544 00:29:58,329 --> 00:30:00,127 (WHISTLE BLOWS) 545 00:30:00,129 --> 00:30:01,530 (MUSIC PLAYING) 546 00:30:01,532 --> 00:30:03,999 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 547 00:30:04,001 --> 00:30:05,399 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 548 00:30:05,401 --> 00:30:07,101 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 549 00:30:07,103 --> 00:30:09,404 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 550 00:30:09,406 --> 00:30:12,240 ♪ Let's go, let's go ♪ 551 00:30:12,242 --> 00:30:14,742 ♪ It'll all, it'll be all right ♪ 552 00:30:14,744 --> 00:30:17,578 ♪ Let's go, let's go ♪ 553 00:30:17,580 --> 00:30:20,348 ♪ So much fun, I can dance all night ♪ 554 00:30:20,350 --> 00:30:23,684 ♪ 'Cause we're rocking, and we're rolling ♪ 555 00:30:23,686 --> 00:30:25,553 ♪ Going to the party tonight ♪ 556 00:30:25,555 --> 00:30:29,124 ♪ Yeah, we're rocking, now we're rolling ♪ 557 00:30:29,126 --> 00:30:32,094 ♪ Going to the party tonight ♪ 558 00:30:32,096 --> 00:30:33,462 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 559 00:30:33,464 --> 00:30:35,262 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 560 00:30:35,264 --> 00:30:37,732 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 561 00:30:37,734 --> 00:30:39,233 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 562 00:30:39,235 --> 00:30:40,668 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 563 00:30:40,670 --> 00:30:42,503 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ 564 00:30:42,505 --> 00:30:44,673 - ♪ Let's go, let's go... ♪ - (LAUGHING) 565 00:30:44,675 --> 00:30:46,174 What? 566 00:30:46,176 --> 00:30:48,276 It looks like someone threw up on your face. 567 00:30:48,278 --> 00:30:49,778 Okay, have you seen your face? 568 00:30:49,780 --> 00:30:51,213 Or Sophie's? 569 00:30:51,215 --> 00:30:52,446 (LAUGHTER) 570 00:30:52,448 --> 00:30:54,281 No, no, no, no, no. 571 00:30:54,283 --> 00:30:55,384 Can't laugh. It hurts. 572 00:30:55,386 --> 00:30:56,451 You have one minute left. 573 00:30:56,453 --> 00:30:58,520 Look, we're not gonna finish. 574 00:30:58,522 --> 00:31:00,688 We just have to beat them, 575 00:31:00,690 --> 00:31:03,791 wipe their saucy smiles off their CrossFit faces. 576 00:31:03,793 --> 00:31:05,761 (GAGS) 577 00:31:05,763 --> 00:31:08,296 I can't. No more. 578 00:31:08,298 --> 00:31:09,630 I give in. 579 00:31:09,632 --> 00:31:12,634 No, you can't give in. 580 00:31:12,636 --> 00:31:16,203 Would you let those Worth the Wait girls 581 00:31:16,205 --> 00:31:18,141 star in "Girls Gone Wild"? 582 00:31:20,511 --> 00:31:21,710 Mm-mm. 583 00:31:21,712 --> 00:31:25,312 Then show me your willpower! 584 00:31:25,314 --> 00:31:26,615 - Oh, God. - (GROANING) 585 00:31:26,617 --> 00:31:28,750 ♪ 'Cause we're rockin' ♪ 586 00:31:28,752 --> 00:31:30,351 ♪ Now we're rollin' ♪ 587 00:31:30,353 --> 00:31:33,055 ♪ Going to the party tonight ♪ 588 00:31:33,057 --> 00:31:34,356 ♪ Yeah, we're rocking... ♪ 589 00:31:34,358 --> 00:31:35,589 Good job. Proud of you. 590 00:31:35,591 --> 00:31:38,559 ♪ Going to the party tonight ♪ 591 00:31:38,561 --> 00:31:40,228 - ♪ Yeah, we're rocking ♪ - ♪ Rocking ♪ 592 00:31:40,230 --> 00:31:41,663 - ♪ Now we're rolling ♪ - ♪ Rolling... ♪ 593 00:31:41,665 --> 00:31:43,831 - Time's up. - (GROANS) 594 00:31:43,833 --> 00:31:46,467 ♪ Yeah, we're rocking, now we're rolling... ♪ 595 00:31:46,469 --> 00:31:48,472 (CHEERING) 596 00:31:54,278 --> 00:31:55,543 Ugh. 597 00:31:55,545 --> 00:31:57,546 We tell no one about this. 598 00:31:57,548 --> 00:31:59,548 Sophie, do you have antacids? 599 00:31:59,550 --> 00:32:01,319 Yeah. They're in my purse. 600 00:32:03,686 --> 00:32:07,655 Oh, no. Block your ears again. 601 00:32:07,657 --> 00:32:10,357 - ♪ La, la la la la! ♪ - (PLOPPING) 602 00:32:10,359 --> 00:32:12,694 ♪ La, la la! ♪ (GROANS) 603 00:32:12,696 --> 00:32:14,197 (LAUGHS) 604 00:32:15,631 --> 00:32:17,432 (SPRAYING) 605 00:32:17,434 --> 00:32:19,867 Okay, I'm gonna cross this off. 606 00:32:19,869 --> 00:32:23,137 Next one on the list is... 607 00:32:23,139 --> 00:32:27,209 perform at an open mic night. 608 00:32:27,211 --> 00:32:31,213 Piper, this has your name written all over it. 609 00:32:31,215 --> 00:32:32,446 What do you mean? 610 00:32:32,448 --> 00:32:33,781 It's from that time that you choked 611 00:32:33,783 --> 00:32:35,416 before the variety show in eighth grade. 612 00:32:35,418 --> 00:32:37,152 (LAUGHS) That's right. 613 00:32:37,154 --> 00:32:39,186 It was so embarrassing. 614 00:32:39,188 --> 00:32:40,422 (BOTH LAUGH) 615 00:32:40,424 --> 00:32:41,755 Hey, you cannot talk about embarrassing. 616 00:32:41,757 --> 00:32:44,126 We can literally hear you shitting molten lava. 617 00:32:44,128 --> 00:32:45,527 I hate myself. 618 00:32:45,529 --> 00:32:47,896 (CELLPHONE BUZZES) 619 00:32:47,898 --> 00:32:50,167 (CHIME RINGS) 620 00:33:03,746 --> 00:33:05,280 You're leaving? 621 00:33:05,282 --> 00:33:06,514 Yeah. 622 00:33:06,516 --> 00:33:08,282 O-Okay. 623 00:33:08,284 --> 00:33:10,152 Bye, Sophie. 624 00:33:10,154 --> 00:33:11,522 Okay, bye. 625 00:33:20,496 --> 00:33:23,764 There's really not a... a good way to say this 626 00:33:23,766 --> 00:33:25,302 or a good time. 627 00:33:29,740 --> 00:33:31,642 Your dad is moving out. 628 00:33:37,848 --> 00:33:41,916 We were gonna wait until after graduation to tell you, but... 629 00:33:41,918 --> 00:33:45,122 Your mom can't live with me for one more second. 630 00:33:48,591 --> 00:33:51,262 You're the one who said our marriage was dead. 631 00:34:17,520 --> 00:34:19,789 Suppose this was a long time coming. 632 00:34:25,828 --> 00:34:28,329 So you're just gonna leave, too? 633 00:34:28,331 --> 00:34:30,301 Got an early-morning lecture. 634 00:34:32,335 --> 00:34:33,538 You seen my jacket? 635 00:34:34,837 --> 00:34:36,573 It's in the back room. 636 00:34:40,978 --> 00:34:42,914 (CRICKETS CHIRPING) 637 00:35:01,931 --> 00:35:04,666 "There's something both frightening 638 00:35:04,668 --> 00:35:08,469 "and yet so very comforting about darkness. 639 00:35:08,471 --> 00:35:11,572 "It's in the way it hugs every curve of your body, 640 00:35:11,574 --> 00:35:13,875 "how it forgives those mountains and plateaus 641 00:35:13,877 --> 00:35:15,643 "that daylight does not. 642 00:35:15,645 --> 00:35:17,878 "In the darkness, you can hide. 643 00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:20,447 "You can hide from pretty much anything, 644 00:35:20,449 --> 00:35:22,750 so you turn off the lights." 645 00:35:22,752 --> 00:35:25,887 I don't even know if it's poetry, 646 00:35:25,889 --> 00:35:28,523 just random thoughts, 647 00:35:28,525 --> 00:35:30,494 brain excrement. 648 00:35:32,728 --> 00:35:34,397 No one's ever read it. 649 00:35:35,665 --> 00:35:37,931 I feel like I'm in the dark, 650 00:35:37,933 --> 00:35:39,536 like I'm hiding. 651 00:35:41,772 --> 00:35:46,074 You do? From what? 652 00:35:46,076 --> 00:35:47,909 I keep listening to "Appassionata." 653 00:35:47,911 --> 00:35:49,476 Beethoven wrote it 654 00:35:49,478 --> 00:35:51,913 when he was losing his hearing and no one knew. 655 00:35:51,915 --> 00:35:53,583 He hid it from everyone. 656 00:35:55,384 --> 00:35:56,786 He was in the dark. 657 00:36:01,424 --> 00:36:03,760 Can I tell you something? 658 00:36:05,561 --> 00:36:06,596 Yeah. What's up? 659 00:36:20,009 --> 00:36:22,444 You should keep writing. 660 00:36:22,446 --> 00:36:25,079 Your brain excrement is good shit. 661 00:36:25,081 --> 00:36:26,348 (BOTH LAUGH) 662 00:36:26,350 --> 00:36:28,418 (MUSIC PLAYING) 663 00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:31,418 ♪ Let go ♪ 664 00:36:31,420 --> 00:36:34,121 ♪ We're climbing up a step higher ♪ 665 00:36:34,123 --> 00:36:35,724 ♪ Let go ♪ 666 00:36:35,726 --> 00:36:37,659 ♪ We're reaching out to touch gold... ♪ 667 00:36:37,661 --> 00:36:41,096 No, no, no, no, no, I am an average white guy. 668 00:36:41,098 --> 00:36:44,065 But I'm expected to somehow be doing awesome, 669 00:36:44,067 --> 00:36:47,034 succeeding, and kicking ass, despite being average. 670 00:36:47,036 --> 00:36:48,703 Because I'm white? 671 00:36:48,705 --> 00:36:50,038 Let me ask you something. 672 00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:52,540 If being white was all it was cracked up to be, 673 00:36:52,542 --> 00:36:56,578 I should be hosting my own show on cable TV, right? 674 00:36:56,580 --> 00:36:59,012 Well, then why am I stuck emceeing this open mic? 675 00:36:59,014 --> 00:37:00,482 'Cause you suck. 676 00:37:00,484 --> 00:37:02,083 - (LAUGHTER) - Loser. 677 00:37:02,085 --> 00:37:04,655 Yeah, my... my mom showed up, everyone. Heh. 678 00:37:07,491 --> 00:37:08,623 O-Oh, my God. 679 00:37:08,625 --> 00:37:10,991 Guys. Hi. 680 00:37:10,993 --> 00:37:13,128 Uh, w-what are you doing here? 681 00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,762 We could ask you the same question. 682 00:37:14,764 --> 00:37:16,701 We're here for the gig later. 683 00:37:17,868 --> 00:37:19,567 Oh. 684 00:37:19,569 --> 00:37:21,572 Thought you were helping your dad? 685 00:37:22,873 --> 00:37:25,672 Uh, yeah. Yeah, I was. 686 00:37:25,674 --> 00:37:27,741 I just... I just saw there... 687 00:37:27,743 --> 00:37:29,076 We're here for open mic night. 688 00:37:29,078 --> 00:37:30,677 (SNICKERS) 689 00:37:30,679 --> 00:37:32,480 Why is that, J-Lo? 690 00:37:32,482 --> 00:37:33,848 Because Honor wanted us to. 691 00:37:33,850 --> 00:37:35,849 (MOCKING) "Because Honor wanted us to do it." 692 00:37:35,851 --> 00:37:37,918 Don't embarrass yourself, Leah. 693 00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:39,587 It'll ruin your spray tan. 694 00:37:39,589 --> 00:37:42,857 Oh, you think you're so funny, but just remember. 695 00:37:42,859 --> 00:37:45,362 We have videotape that might just embarrass you. 696 00:37:46,563 --> 00:37:47,762 Come on, Piper. 697 00:37:47,764 --> 00:37:49,133 Troy has some friends stopping by later. 698 00:37:51,935 --> 00:37:53,036 - Come on. - Yeah. 699 00:37:55,471 --> 00:37:56,473 (LAUGHS) 700 00:38:01,610 --> 00:38:05,447 My name is Sophie Stephens, and I'm a virgin. 701 00:38:05,449 --> 00:38:06,614 Frigid. 702 00:38:06,616 --> 00:38:08,750 (LAUGHTER) 703 00:38:08,752 --> 00:38:12,719 I created an app called Worth the Wait 704 00:38:12,721 --> 00:38:14,521 to help you control those urges. 705 00:38:14,523 --> 00:38:16,123 How do you control your urges, Sophie? 706 00:38:16,125 --> 00:38:17,925 Best friends AA batteries? 707 00:38:17,927 --> 00:38:20,061 - (LAUGHTER) - It's... It's fine. 708 00:38:20,063 --> 00:38:22,130 I'm... I'm not ashamed. 709 00:38:22,132 --> 00:38:25,233 I masturbate consciously. 710 00:38:25,235 --> 00:38:26,768 - Yeah! - (LAUGHTER) 711 00:38:26,770 --> 00:38:28,902 And when I have really overpowering urges, 712 00:38:28,904 --> 00:38:31,605 I go for a run or a spin class. 713 00:38:31,607 --> 00:38:32,739 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 714 00:38:32,741 --> 00:38:34,909 This is called 715 00:38:34,911 --> 00:38:37,911 "Gentle Mutilation on the Natural State of my Body 716 00:38:37,913 --> 00:38:39,682 in the Name of Being Socially Acceptable." 717 00:39:05,141 --> 00:39:09,043 Can't believe you were ever friends with her. 718 00:39:09,045 --> 00:39:10,181 Thank you. 719 00:39:12,549 --> 00:39:13,982 (RAZOR CLATTERS) 720 00:39:13,984 --> 00:39:16,183 (APPLAUSE) 721 00:39:16,185 --> 00:39:18,719 If you'd like to sign up, and I know all of you do... 722 00:39:18,721 --> 00:39:19,887 You were really good up there. 723 00:39:19,889 --> 00:39:21,855 Whatever. 724 00:39:21,857 --> 00:39:23,827 Thanks, gorgeous. 725 00:39:25,194 --> 00:39:26,960 Hey, guys. 726 00:39:26,962 --> 00:39:28,795 Hey. 727 00:39:28,797 --> 00:39:30,565 What are you doing here? 728 00:39:30,567 --> 00:39:32,166 Nikki Yanofsky's coming on at 10:00. 729 00:39:32,168 --> 00:39:34,536 So you've got time to come see a gig, 730 00:39:34,538 --> 00:39:36,103 but you're too busy to help us pack? 731 00:39:36,105 --> 00:39:38,639 I had finals this week, Issy. 732 00:39:38,641 --> 00:39:39,844 Pack for what? 733 00:39:41,011 --> 00:39:42,309 All right, ladies and gentlemen, 734 00:39:42,311 --> 00:39:44,579 next up, can we have Piper Morley to the stage? 735 00:39:44,581 --> 00:39:46,213 Piper Mor... Piper Morley. 736 00:39:46,215 --> 00:39:47,614 You're going on? 737 00:39:47,616 --> 00:39:49,016 - No. - Yes. 738 00:39:49,018 --> 00:39:51,221 Cool. I'll grab a seat. 739 00:39:54,156 --> 00:39:55,255 Break a nail. 740 00:39:55,257 --> 00:39:57,257 Thank you. 741 00:39:57,259 --> 00:39:59,594 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 742 00:39:59,596 --> 00:40:01,732 (SCATTERED WHISPERING) 743 00:40:02,866 --> 00:40:03,868 (AUDIENCE MEMBER CLEARS THROAT) 744 00:40:08,038 --> 00:40:10,840 Hey, Barbie, say something. 745 00:40:12,676 --> 00:40:13,878 Yeah. Um... 746 00:40:15,344 --> 00:40:18,846 uh, roses are red, 747 00:40:18,848 --> 00:40:20,047 beer is great, 748 00:40:20,049 --> 00:40:21,616 poems are hard, 749 00:40:21,618 --> 00:40:23,217 beer. 750 00:40:23,219 --> 00:40:25,152 (MAN CHUCKLES) 751 00:40:25,154 --> 00:40:26,788 Uh, that's a... 752 00:40:26,790 --> 00:40:30,891 that was a T-shirt I woke up in the other morning. 753 00:40:30,893 --> 00:40:33,261 - Um... - (CHUCKLES) 754 00:40:33,263 --> 00:40:38,333 Okay. Uh, speaking of beer, um, what... 755 00:40:38,335 --> 00:40:41,906 what do a bottle of Corona and... and a blonde have in common? 756 00:40:43,239 --> 00:40:44,905 No? Uh... 757 00:40:44,907 --> 00:40:46,944 both are empty from the neck up. 758 00:40:48,344 --> 00:40:50,043 (COUGHS) 759 00:40:50,045 --> 00:40:52,248 Just gonna... Okay. 760 00:40:58,621 --> 00:40:59,956 Um... 761 00:41:01,056 --> 00:41:02,692 uh... 762 00:41:05,127 --> 00:41:06,696 oh, God. 763 00:41:10,634 --> 00:41:13,203 So I'm an only child... 764 00:41:15,739 --> 00:41:19,072 and I've got divorced parents. 765 00:41:19,074 --> 00:41:21,678 Who else here has divorced parents? 766 00:41:23,346 --> 00:41:26,648 I decided to live with my dad. 767 00:41:26,650 --> 00:41:28,215 Why? 'Cause at first, 768 00:41:28,217 --> 00:41:30,050 it was like living with a cool older brother, 769 00:41:30,052 --> 00:41:31,753 'cause he left the toilet seat up, 770 00:41:31,755 --> 00:41:33,020 and I didn't have a curfew. 771 00:41:33,022 --> 00:41:36,123 Plus my mom, she sucks. 772 00:41:36,125 --> 00:41:37,791 (LAUGHS) 773 00:41:37,793 --> 00:41:40,895 But she does make the best banana bacon pancakes ever, 774 00:41:40,897 --> 00:41:43,431 so that's why I still let her come around. 775 00:41:43,433 --> 00:41:49,436 She cheated on my dad for years, and... 776 00:41:49,438 --> 00:41:53,808 uh, now she's with this guy called BMyBae2night, 777 00:41:53,810 --> 00:41:57,811 which I'm pretty sure is, like, the worst possible name 778 00:41:57,813 --> 00:42:01,748 you could have on OkCupid, except for NotAnInternetKiller. 779 00:42:01,750 --> 00:42:03,284 (LAUGHTER) 780 00:42:03,286 --> 00:42:05,018 This is also around the time 781 00:42:05,020 --> 00:42:06,887 that I started making bad decisions. 782 00:42:06,889 --> 00:42:09,357 Now, what kind of bad decisions, you may ask? 783 00:42:09,359 --> 00:42:10,958 Here. Actually, let's play a game. 784 00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:12,826 So you guys name a location, 785 00:42:12,828 --> 00:42:16,297 and I will say a bad decision I made in connection to it. 786 00:42:16,299 --> 00:42:19,000 Uh, you in the second row, red sweater next to the guy 787 00:42:19,002 --> 00:42:21,270 who's hoping to sleep with you by the end of the night. 788 00:42:22,806 --> 00:42:24,038 That's my brother. 789 00:42:24,040 --> 00:42:25,038 - (LAUGHTER) - Oh. 790 00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:26,174 Oh, my bad. 791 00:42:26,176 --> 00:42:27,744 How about Starbucks? 792 00:42:29,145 --> 00:42:31,712 Caused a small, but contained fire. 793 00:42:31,714 --> 00:42:32,713 (LAUGHTER) 794 00:42:32,715 --> 00:42:34,148 405 Freeway. 795 00:42:34,150 --> 00:42:36,150 My car was towed while I was still in it, 796 00:42:36,152 --> 00:42:37,851 and I didn't have pants on. 797 00:42:37,853 --> 00:42:38,853 (LAUGHTER) 798 00:42:38,855 --> 00:42:40,221 Malibu Beach? 799 00:42:40,223 --> 00:42:42,355 Threw up on a French bulldog and his owner. 800 00:42:42,357 --> 00:42:44,358 Um, I still get the occasional text from him. 801 00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:46,460 The dog, not the owner. 802 00:42:46,462 --> 00:42:48,161 (LAUGHTER) 803 00:42:48,163 --> 00:42:49,496 My name's Piper. When I grow up, 804 00:42:49,498 --> 00:42:51,833 I would like to be a boozed-up writer like my dad 805 00:42:51,835 --> 00:42:53,201 or Elizabeth Bishop, 806 00:42:53,203 --> 00:42:56,170 just without the unrequited love and torture part. 807 00:42:56,172 --> 00:42:58,271 - Amen. - Whoo-hoo. 808 00:42:58,273 --> 00:43:00,210 (APPLAUSE AND CHEERING) 809 00:43:07,984 --> 00:43:09,920 (BAND PLAYING) 810 00:43:13,389 --> 00:43:16,894 ♪ You must be blowin' smoke ♪ 811 00:43:19,061 --> 00:43:21,964 (NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE) 812 00:43:23,398 --> 00:43:26,235 ♪ You must be blowin' smoke ♪ 813 00:43:29,806 --> 00:43:34,407 ♪ High on your supply ♪ 814 00:43:34,409 --> 00:43:39,045 ♪ Believe in love ♪ 815 00:43:39,047 --> 00:43:40,313 ♪ Holes in ♪ 816 00:43:40,315 --> 00:43:43,384 ♪ Sugar, sugar coating ♪ 817 00:43:43,386 --> 00:43:47,824 ♪ You must be blowin' smoke ♪ 818 00:43:48,891 --> 00:43:50,891 ♪ Hopeless ♪ 819 00:43:50,893 --> 00:43:54,161 ♪ Got to get going now ♪ 820 00:43:54,163 --> 00:43:57,565 ♪ You must be blowin' smoke ♪ 821 00:43:57,567 --> 00:43:59,233 (GRUNTS) 822 00:43:59,235 --> 00:44:00,467 ♪ Holes in ♪ 823 00:44:00,469 --> 00:44:02,170 ♪ Sugar coatin' ♪ 824 00:44:02,172 --> 00:44:03,471 ♪ Ooh hoo ♪ 825 00:44:03,473 --> 00:44:06,907 ♪ I know you must be blowin' smoke ♪ 826 00:44:06,909 --> 00:44:10,311 ♪ You must be blowin' smoke ♪ 827 00:44:10,313 --> 00:44:11,281 (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) 828 00:44:13,482 --> 00:44:15,483 Throw a kick-ass senior year party. 829 00:44:15,485 --> 00:44:17,951 Well, that's your department, Piper. 830 00:44:17,953 --> 00:44:19,286 What? 831 00:44:19,288 --> 00:44:20,822 Isn't that what you, Leah, and Krissy 832 00:44:20,824 --> 00:44:23,090 do for a living, professional partiers? 833 00:44:23,092 --> 00:44:24,427 That's not all we do together. 834 00:44:25,929 --> 00:44:28,862 Okay, sure. Maybe it is, 835 00:44:28,864 --> 00:44:31,331 but the idea is you party with people you wanna hang out with, 836 00:44:31,333 --> 00:44:32,599 you know, not like... 837 00:44:32,601 --> 00:44:34,969 Okay, like it's so great for my image? 838 00:44:34,971 --> 00:44:36,938 I have to tell people that I'm doing research 839 00:44:36,940 --> 00:44:39,172 on women who have been having meaningless sex for years 840 00:44:39,174 --> 00:44:40,373 and how that affects their brain. 841 00:44:40,375 --> 00:44:41,942 Well, maybe if you actually had sex, 842 00:44:41,944 --> 00:44:43,411 you wouldn't be such a psycho with PMS. 843 00:44:43,413 --> 00:44:45,413 Okay, so how are we actually gonna do this, 844 00:44:45,415 --> 00:44:47,248 'cause I can't have the party at my place, 845 00:44:47,250 --> 00:44:48,916 so obviously it has to be at Isabella's. 846 00:44:48,918 --> 00:44:50,451 What? That's impossible. 847 00:44:50,453 --> 00:44:52,587 My parents are doing renovations. 848 00:44:52,589 --> 00:44:53,954 Really? 849 00:44:53,956 --> 00:44:55,322 So it's at Sophie's. 850 00:44:55,324 --> 00:44:57,257 What? No. Mm-mm. No way. 851 00:44:57,259 --> 00:44:59,427 Don't your parents go away, like, every weekend? 852 00:44:59,429 --> 00:45:00,628 Yes, but that's besides the point. 853 00:45:00,630 --> 00:45:03,163 No, I mean, Sophie, it's perfect. 854 00:45:03,165 --> 00:45:04,498 I mean, your house is huge. 855 00:45:04,500 --> 00:45:06,199 You've got a pool and the fire pit in the back. 856 00:45:06,201 --> 00:45:07,567 It's like a perfect make-out spot. 857 00:45:07,569 --> 00:45:09,237 - No, we can't... - No, no, thanks, Sophie. 858 00:45:09,239 --> 00:45:11,172 I'll help clean up. Uh, will you arrange the drinks? 859 00:45:11,174 --> 00:45:12,340 - I already did the invite. - What? 860 00:45:12,342 --> 00:45:13,974 Later. 861 00:45:13,976 --> 00:45:16,013 - (LAUGHS) - Piper! 862 00:45:17,513 --> 00:45:18,913 (SIGHS) 863 00:45:18,915 --> 00:45:24,018 Okay, bacon banana cream pie pancakes. 864 00:45:24,020 --> 00:45:26,523 Yum. Coming up. I'm almost done. 865 00:45:30,058 --> 00:45:31,060 You okay? 866 00:45:36,065 --> 00:45:37,568 Why didn't you go to Honor's funeral? 867 00:45:39,969 --> 00:45:41,271 I was waiting for you. 868 00:45:43,505 --> 00:45:45,538 You didn't have to go. 869 00:45:45,540 --> 00:45:47,909 Yes, I... I wanted to go. 870 00:45:47,911 --> 00:45:49,643 Of course I was gonna go. 871 00:45:49,645 --> 00:45:52,179 I mean, Honor's your friend. 872 00:45:52,181 --> 00:45:53,483 Was. 873 00:45:57,953 --> 00:46:00,520 Is everything okay over here? 874 00:46:00,522 --> 00:46:02,088 You all right? 875 00:46:02,090 --> 00:46:04,190 Yeah. Um, it's good. 876 00:46:04,192 --> 00:46:06,427 Everything's good. 877 00:46:06,429 --> 00:46:08,965 Oh, did I tell you, uh, Dad's dating again? 878 00:46:10,600 --> 00:46:11,998 No. 879 00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:15,369 Yeah, he met some... some great woman. 880 00:46:15,371 --> 00:46:18,072 She's a lawyer, 881 00:46:18,074 --> 00:46:21,976 urban renewal, works pro bono. 882 00:46:21,978 --> 00:46:25,115 She's a redhead, and she drives a Porsche. 883 00:46:28,583 --> 00:46:33,387 Wow, really? That's... Okay. Good. 884 00:46:33,389 --> 00:46:35,355 Yeah, he's really happy. 885 00:46:35,357 --> 00:46:39,259 Okay, I think I found the only clean plate in the entire house. 886 00:46:39,261 --> 00:46:41,061 Thanks, Mom. 887 00:46:41,063 --> 00:46:42,598 (CLEARS THROAT) 888 00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:48,402 (SIGHS) 889 00:46:48,404 --> 00:46:50,003 Really good. (LAUGHS) 890 00:46:50,005 --> 00:46:52,643 Okay, good. Good. 891 00:46:54,476 --> 00:46:56,245 Hey, I'm moving in with Colin. 892 00:46:57,647 --> 00:46:59,713 BMyBae2night? That guy? 893 00:46:59,715 --> 00:47:01,282 That was a joke. That was a joke. 894 00:47:01,284 --> 00:47:03,083 His friends h-helped him set up the profile. 895 00:47:03,085 --> 00:47:05,987 I told you that. It doesn't... Actually, I would just like it 896 00:47:05,989 --> 00:47:07,557 if you would call him Colin, all right? 897 00:47:09,125 --> 00:47:10,260 You getting married? 898 00:47:11,326 --> 00:47:13,226 I don't... Maybe, I guess. 899 00:47:13,228 --> 00:47:14,594 Possibly. 900 00:47:14,596 --> 00:47:15,531 Yeah, we are. 901 00:47:18,701 --> 00:47:21,668 Piper, we've got to move on. 902 00:47:21,670 --> 00:47:24,137 Right? I mean, your dad's moving on. 903 00:47:24,139 --> 00:47:25,275 He's dating. 904 00:47:27,777 --> 00:47:31,344 And are you dealing with all of this... 905 00:47:31,346 --> 00:47:33,179 or are you just... are you just keeping it inside 906 00:47:33,181 --> 00:47:34,482 the whole time, or what are you doing? 907 00:47:34,484 --> 00:47:36,016 Actually, you know, your dad was telling me 908 00:47:36,018 --> 00:47:37,284 you've been hanging out with Isabella. 909 00:47:37,286 --> 00:47:39,186 I know you two have been through a lot, and... 910 00:47:39,188 --> 00:47:40,454 but she's always been a really good... 911 00:47:40,456 --> 00:47:41,454 Dad's not dating! 912 00:47:41,456 --> 00:47:42,790 He sleeps on the sofa 913 00:47:42,792 --> 00:47:44,625 and looks like the Dude from "The Big Lebowski," 914 00:47:44,627 --> 00:47:45,594 so everything is not okay. 915 00:47:48,130 --> 00:47:49,398 Oh. 916 00:47:54,770 --> 00:47:56,103 Sorry. 917 00:47:56,105 --> 00:47:59,306 Piper. Uh... 918 00:47:59,308 --> 00:48:00,641 Oh. 919 00:48:00,643 --> 00:48:03,643 (SCOFFS) A Porsche and a redhead? 920 00:48:03,645 --> 00:48:05,311 Oh, that's, yeah, a dream. 921 00:48:05,313 --> 00:48:06,582 Dream. 922 00:48:12,321 --> 00:48:14,587 (SIGHS) 923 00:48:14,589 --> 00:48:16,158 (CHUCKLES) 924 00:48:20,563 --> 00:48:22,529 I decorated this whole room 925 00:48:22,531 --> 00:48:25,568 around his terrible brown recliner. 926 00:48:27,203 --> 00:48:28,768 Now look at it. 927 00:48:28,770 --> 00:48:29,705 Heh. 928 00:48:31,273 --> 00:48:33,143 It's what you wanted, wasn't it? 929 00:48:35,677 --> 00:48:37,380 Yes... 930 00:48:38,748 --> 00:48:41,051 but it still hurts. 931 00:48:44,453 --> 00:48:47,356 Just promise me you won't leave me, too. 932 00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:56,130 (PHONE LINE RINGS) 933 00:48:56,132 --> 00:48:57,797 You've reached Dillon. 934 00:48:57,799 --> 00:48:59,467 You know the drill. 935 00:48:59,469 --> 00:49:01,434 Beep! 936 00:49:01,436 --> 00:49:02,603 (BEEP) 937 00:49:02,605 --> 00:49:05,105 Thanks for ignoring my call... 938 00:49:05,107 --> 00:49:07,273 jerk. 939 00:49:07,275 --> 00:49:09,242 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 940 00:49:09,244 --> 00:49:12,545 ♪ Because of you, I ♪ 941 00:49:12,547 --> 00:49:15,882 ♪ No matter what I do, oh ♪ 942 00:49:15,884 --> 00:49:20,454 - ♪ Dance, dance ♪ - ♪ Because of you, I ♪ 943 00:49:20,456 --> 00:49:22,188 - ♪ I wish I never... ♪ - (CAMERA CLICKING) 944 00:49:22,190 --> 00:49:23,389 It's almost 9:00. 945 00:49:23,391 --> 00:49:24,592 Where is everyone? 946 00:49:24,594 --> 00:49:27,228 Ever heard of being fashionably late? 947 00:49:27,230 --> 00:49:29,329 Or you're just not as popular as you thought. 948 00:49:29,331 --> 00:49:31,532 Oh, what did I tell you about using the word "popular"? 949 00:49:31,534 --> 00:49:33,666 ♪ Dance, dance ♪ 950 00:49:33,668 --> 00:49:37,237 - ♪ Because of you ♪ - ♪ Dance, dance ♪ 951 00:49:37,239 --> 00:49:38,838 ♪ I wish I never knew... ♪ 952 00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:41,474 Let's have a drink, right? 953 00:49:41,476 --> 00:49:43,309 - Here we go. - This is gonna be fun. 954 00:49:43,311 --> 00:49:45,779 Isabella. 955 00:49:45,781 --> 00:49:47,413 Shouldn't we wait till everyone gets here? 956 00:49:47,415 --> 00:49:48,916 We could, or you know 957 00:49:48,918 --> 00:49:50,451 what's more fun than waiting for everyone? 958 00:49:50,453 --> 00:49:52,585 Not waiting for everyone. 959 00:49:52,587 --> 00:49:55,588 'Cause we, us three, are so fun, 960 00:49:55,590 --> 00:49:58,159 are so fun, with parties and stuff. 961 00:49:58,161 --> 00:50:00,326 Like, you know, like, it's a... 962 00:50:00,328 --> 00:50:01,561 Cheers of us three, right? 963 00:50:01,563 --> 00:50:03,630 Come on. Let's cheers it. 964 00:50:03,632 --> 00:50:05,331 The amigos. 965 00:50:05,333 --> 00:50:07,837 Uh-huh. Fun. 966 00:50:10,906 --> 00:50:12,773 Ahh. 967 00:50:12,775 --> 00:50:13,710 Nobody's coming. 968 00:50:15,645 --> 00:50:17,411 What do you mean? 969 00:50:17,413 --> 00:50:18,548 I... 970 00:50:19,614 --> 00:50:21,317 might have... 971 00:50:22,451 --> 00:50:24,451 put the wrong day on the invite. 972 00:50:24,453 --> 00:50:26,453 You did not. 973 00:50:26,455 --> 00:50:28,655 Well, I am... I am sort of dyslexic, so... 974 00:50:28,657 --> 00:50:30,791 - Or you're just stupid. - Hey! 975 00:50:30,793 --> 00:50:35,728 Piper, we did all of this for nothing. 976 00:50:35,730 --> 00:50:38,232 No. No, no, no, no. 977 00:50:38,234 --> 00:50:42,139 Hey, hey, it wasn't for nothing. Um, we... 978 00:50:44,306 --> 00:50:48,509 We got to use your mom's super cool punch bowl. 979 00:50:48,511 --> 00:50:50,878 Come on. 980 00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:54,782 Uh, any requests? 981 00:50:54,784 --> 00:50:58,719 Sophie? Sophie? Music? 982 00:50:58,721 --> 00:51:01,322 I know you wanna dance to Carly Rae Jepsen. 983 00:51:01,324 --> 00:51:04,891 Or... Or we could put on some vintage Bieber. 984 00:51:04,893 --> 00:51:06,226 Oh, wait! 985 00:51:06,228 --> 00:51:07,860 Oh, it's on. 986 00:51:07,862 --> 00:51:09,496 ♪ Supernova, sugar candy ♪ 987 00:51:09,498 --> 00:51:12,398 ♪ Sugar candy, cool it off, and cool it off ♪ 988 00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:16,369 ♪ And pour it on the, pour it on the supernova, supernova ♪ 989 00:51:16,371 --> 00:51:19,840 ♪ Sugar candy, sugar candy, cool it off, and cool it off ♪ 990 00:51:19,842 --> 00:51:24,311 ♪ And pour it on the, pour it on the supernova, supernova ♪ 991 00:51:24,313 --> 00:51:26,512 - ♪ Oh, oh ♪ - (RECORD SCRATCHES) 992 00:51:26,514 --> 00:51:30,351 ♪ Come on, yeah, I own it ♪ 993 00:51:30,353 --> 00:51:32,253 ♪ I want it ♪ 994 00:51:32,255 --> 00:51:34,255 ♪ I've got it ♪ 995 00:51:34,257 --> 00:51:35,922 ♪ I want it ♪ 996 00:51:35,924 --> 00:51:37,958 ♪ I own it ♪ 997 00:51:37,960 --> 00:51:39,960 ♪ I want it ♪ 998 00:51:39,962 --> 00:51:42,329 ♪ I got it ♪ 999 00:51:42,331 --> 00:51:45,532 ♪ Words, waking soft ♪ 1000 00:51:45,534 --> 00:51:47,701 ♪ Waking slow ♪ 1001 00:51:47,703 --> 00:51:50,536 ♪ Fading into focus... ♪ 1002 00:51:50,538 --> 00:51:54,440 This is the best. 1003 00:51:54,442 --> 00:51:56,576 ♪ Every pose ♪ 1004 00:51:56,578 --> 00:52:00,947 ♪ Holding in the moment ♪ 1005 00:52:00,949 --> 00:52:05,552 ♪ Every fall, every rise ♪ 1006 00:52:05,554 --> 00:52:10,324 ♪ Falling on your shoulders ♪ 1007 00:52:10,326 --> 00:52:16,329 ♪ And I'm trying not to try so hard for you... ♪ 1008 00:52:16,331 --> 00:52:18,268 (MUSIC FADING) 1009 00:52:24,572 --> 00:52:26,340 How do you even walk in those? 1010 00:52:26,342 --> 00:52:28,608 They're like knives. 1011 00:52:28,610 --> 00:52:30,777 I walk the walk. 1012 00:52:30,779 --> 00:52:34,348 Or what, Leah and Krissy will stage a mutiny 1013 00:52:34,350 --> 00:52:36,083 and gouge your eyes out with a stiletto? 1014 00:52:36,085 --> 00:52:38,621 (CHUCKLES) Pretty much. 1015 00:52:40,522 --> 00:52:42,456 What do you guys even do together, 1016 00:52:42,458 --> 00:52:44,327 you, Leah, and Krissy? 1017 00:52:45,860 --> 00:52:48,329 Nothing, really. 1018 00:52:48,331 --> 00:52:51,968 It's more just like we're, like, seen together. 1019 00:52:54,436 --> 00:52:57,637 Your friends are nasty bitches. 1020 00:52:57,639 --> 00:53:00,674 I can't stand them. 1021 00:53:00,676 --> 00:53:02,775 Then why do they call you J-Lo? 1022 00:53:02,777 --> 00:53:05,112 J-Lo is cool. 1023 00:53:05,114 --> 00:53:09,882 Not J-Lo, like "Jenny from the Block." 1024 00:53:09,884 --> 00:53:11,987 Jell-O, like pudding. 1025 00:53:14,690 --> 00:53:16,458 Oh. 1026 00:53:19,627 --> 00:53:22,795 Remember when Honor used to put her jeans in the dryer 1027 00:53:22,797 --> 00:53:25,532 before we went out so they'd be super tight? 1028 00:53:25,534 --> 00:53:26,599 (CHUCKLES) 1029 00:53:26,601 --> 00:53:28,101 Remember that white pair? 1030 00:53:28,103 --> 00:53:30,473 God, the guys would lose their shit when she wore those. 1031 00:53:31,706 --> 00:53:33,607 What happened between you and Honor? 1032 00:53:33,609 --> 00:53:38,545 I mean, Piper and me, that was obvious, 1033 00:53:38,547 --> 00:53:39,749 but you guys... 1034 00:53:41,650 --> 00:53:45,522 We drifted apart. 1035 00:53:49,824 --> 00:53:51,560 I miss Honor. 1036 00:53:58,900 --> 00:54:00,703 (SIGHS) 1037 00:54:37,505 --> 00:54:39,139 Hi. 1038 00:54:39,141 --> 00:54:40,940 Issy said there was a party or something, 1039 00:54:40,942 --> 00:54:42,675 a kick-ass senior party? 1040 00:54:42,677 --> 00:54:44,177 Oh. Oh, yeah. 1041 00:54:44,179 --> 00:54:47,213 Uh, it's already over. (LAUGHS) 1042 00:54:47,215 --> 00:54:50,119 Also never really started. Um... 1043 00:54:52,054 --> 00:54:54,755 Isabella's asleep. 1044 00:54:54,757 --> 00:54:57,060 Can I come in? 1045 00:55:00,228 --> 00:55:02,165 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 1046 00:55:13,741 --> 00:55:15,976 I loved seeing you onstage the other night. 1047 00:55:15,978 --> 00:55:18,478 (LAUGHS) 1048 00:55:18,480 --> 00:55:20,146 You were funny. 1049 00:55:20,148 --> 00:55:21,817 That was very brave. 1050 00:55:23,918 --> 00:55:26,487 Brave? Uh, mm-mm. 1051 00:55:26,489 --> 00:55:29,088 See, that's a... that's a code word for, 1052 00:55:29,090 --> 00:55:31,090 "should not have, like, word-vomited 1053 00:55:31,092 --> 00:55:32,592 all of my mental problems." 1054 00:55:32,594 --> 00:55:33,826 "Run for the hills. 1055 00:55:33,828 --> 00:55:35,829 There's a crazy lady on the stage." 1056 00:55:35,831 --> 00:55:37,700 Hey, stop that. 1057 00:55:43,005 --> 00:55:45,771 You know, I've always had a thing for you. 1058 00:55:45,773 --> 00:55:47,875 Really? Hmm. 1059 00:55:47,877 --> 00:55:49,813 What type of thing? 1060 00:55:51,279 --> 00:55:54,114 You know, like, a thing. 1061 00:55:54,116 --> 00:55:56,616 Mm. Like a big thing, 1062 00:55:56,618 --> 00:55:59,119 or like a small thing? 1063 00:55:59,121 --> 00:56:01,657 I'd like to think it's a big thing. 1064 00:56:07,996 --> 00:56:10,963 I don't think Isabella would like this. 1065 00:56:10,965 --> 00:56:13,002 Actually, I know she wouldn't. 1066 00:56:14,636 --> 00:56:16,168 We could play cards. 1067 00:56:16,170 --> 00:56:17,674 I would destroy you at bridge. 1068 00:56:18,973 --> 00:56:20,674 ♪ And I want to ♪ 1069 00:56:20,676 --> 00:56:22,643 ♪ And I want to ♪ 1070 00:56:22,645 --> 00:56:25,181 ♪ And I want to get by ♪ 1071 00:56:30,085 --> 00:56:32,021 (SNORING) 1072 00:56:41,897 --> 00:56:43,996 (COUGHS) 1073 00:56:43,998 --> 00:56:45,935 (GASPING) 1074 00:56:48,069 --> 00:56:49,671 Oh, my God. 1075 00:56:52,273 --> 00:56:54,675 Are you okay? 1076 00:56:54,677 --> 00:56:57,046 I think I saw David Bowie last night. 1077 00:56:58,681 --> 00:56:59,816 (DILLON YELPS) 1078 00:57:00,882 --> 00:57:02,315 Who was that? 1079 00:57:02,317 --> 00:57:03,849 I don't know. 1080 00:57:03,851 --> 00:57:05,721 Sounded like it came from the fire pit. 1081 00:57:08,590 --> 00:57:10,357 - (CAR DOOR SLAMS) - (GASPS) 1082 00:57:10,359 --> 00:57:12,358 - (MAN SPEAKING) - Oh, no, no, no. 1083 00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:14,293 You know, air bags are important. 1084 00:57:14,295 --> 00:57:15,728 You don't want... 1085 00:57:15,730 --> 00:57:17,864 Oh, no, no, no. My parents are here. 1086 00:57:17,866 --> 00:57:19,866 Uh, what should we do? 1087 00:57:19,868 --> 00:57:21,934 - I... I don't know. - We should hide. 1088 00:57:21,936 --> 00:57:23,270 Okay, yeah. Hide. In the closet. 1089 00:57:23,272 --> 00:57:24,737 - In the closet. In the closet. - No, no, no! 1090 00:57:24,739 --> 00:57:26,074 - Behind the couch. - Okay, okay, behind... 1091 00:57:27,775 --> 00:57:29,141 Lewis, there's been a break-in! 1092 00:57:29,143 --> 00:57:30,777 - Sophie! Sophie! Oh, my God! - What? What? 1093 00:57:30,779 --> 00:57:31,945 Please, please tell me you're okay? 1094 00:57:31,947 --> 00:57:33,079 Sophie! Soph! What... 1095 00:57:33,081 --> 00:57:35,150 What is... What is this? 1096 00:57:39,855 --> 00:57:41,654 - (PHONE BEEPS) - Hey, Siri, 1097 00:57:41,656 --> 00:57:44,123 what's the best way to get gum out of pubic hair? 1098 00:57:44,125 --> 00:57:45,659 (BEEP) 1099 00:57:45,661 --> 00:57:47,159 Okay, here's what I found on the web 1100 00:57:47,161 --> 00:57:49,795 for "what's the best way to get gum out of pubic hair?" 1101 00:57:49,797 --> 00:57:51,965 Mayonnaise. 1102 00:57:51,967 --> 00:57:54,233 Look at this place. 1103 00:57:54,235 --> 00:57:57,704 It's like wild animals stormed through the house. 1104 00:57:57,706 --> 00:57:59,905 I mean, I used to have parties when I was a kid, 1105 00:57:59,907 --> 00:58:01,074 but n-nothing like this. 1106 00:58:01,076 --> 00:58:03,643 This is like a... a rager or something. 1107 00:58:03,645 --> 00:58:05,846 This... This utter and complete carnage. 1108 00:58:05,848 --> 00:58:07,079 Yes. Good word. 1109 00:58:07,081 --> 00:58:09,248 Mom, we did not have a party. I promise. 1110 00:58:09,250 --> 00:58:10,784 Nobody came over. 1111 00:58:10,786 --> 00:58:14,121 No boys. It was just me, Isabella, and Piper. 1112 00:58:14,123 --> 00:58:17,994 You expect us to believe that you three girls did all of this? 1113 00:58:19,927 --> 00:58:22,061 - (SNORTS) - (LAUGHS) 1114 00:58:22,063 --> 00:58:23,396 You know what? Maybe you will think 1115 00:58:23,398 --> 00:58:25,297 being grounded is equally funny. 1116 00:58:25,299 --> 00:58:27,199 Yeah, Sophie, I don't know what's come over you. 1117 00:58:27,201 --> 00:58:29,101 You know, you disappoint me. 1118 00:58:29,103 --> 00:58:32,038 You, too, Isabella! Expected more from you. 1119 00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:33,206 I did not. 1120 00:58:33,208 --> 00:58:34,708 I'm sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Stephens. 1121 00:58:34,710 --> 00:58:37,344 - (SCREAMS) - (SCREAMS) 1122 00:58:37,346 --> 00:58:38,848 What the... 1123 00:58:42,183 --> 00:58:44,016 SIRI: Here's what I found on the web 1124 00:58:44,018 --> 00:58:47,721 for "what's the second-best way to get gum out of pubic hair?" 1125 00:58:47,723 --> 00:58:49,257 Ice cubes. 1126 00:58:51,793 --> 00:58:52,795 (LAUGHS) 1127 00:59:16,351 --> 00:59:18,317 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna bring it ♪ 1128 00:59:18,319 --> 00:59:20,987 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna swing it ♪ 1129 00:59:20,989 --> 00:59:23,223 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna fire it up ♪ 1130 00:59:23,225 --> 00:59:25,458 ♪ And the Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1131 00:59:25,460 --> 00:59:27,828 ♪ Yeah, the Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1132 00:59:27,830 --> 00:59:29,295 ♪ Yeah, the Mariners... ♪ 1133 00:59:29,297 --> 00:59:32,165 (MOCKING) ♪ Oh, the Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1134 00:59:32,167 --> 00:59:34,166 Thanks for helping us clean. 1135 00:59:34,168 --> 00:59:36,203 Oh, I had to sneak out a guy. 1136 00:59:36,205 --> 00:59:37,737 Was that who was screaming? 1137 00:59:37,739 --> 00:59:40,005 Yeah, gum got caught in his pubes. 1138 00:59:40,007 --> 00:59:41,208 - Ow. - Yeah. 1139 00:59:41,210 --> 00:59:42,875 So who's the guy? 1140 00:59:42,877 --> 00:59:47,114 Oh, just some... It's a model I met at Sunset Tower. 1141 00:59:47,116 --> 00:59:48,985 So original. 1142 00:59:50,219 --> 00:59:51,721 Yeah. 1143 00:59:56,190 --> 00:59:58,125 I love that you're still doing this. 1144 00:59:58,127 --> 01:00:00,025 This looks like your best issue yet. 1145 01:00:00,027 --> 01:00:01,230 You read it? 1146 01:00:07,368 --> 01:00:10,906 So, number five. 1147 01:00:14,042 --> 01:00:17,210 Yeah, I... I can't read it. This one. 1148 01:00:17,212 --> 01:00:18,911 Okay, let me see. 1149 01:00:18,913 --> 01:00:20,246 (CLEARS THROAT) 1150 01:00:20,248 --> 01:00:21,380 Get back at... 1151 01:00:21,382 --> 01:00:23,550 Get... Get back... 1152 01:00:23,552 --> 01:00:25,184 I mean, if we can't read it, 1153 01:00:25,186 --> 01:00:26,853 we should just skip to the last one. 1154 01:00:26,855 --> 01:00:28,454 No, no, no, no, no. 1155 01:00:28,456 --> 01:00:31,023 Rest. Test. Get... 1156 01:00:31,025 --> 01:00:33,860 No. Okay, give it to me. Give it to me. Give it to me. 1157 01:00:33,862 --> 01:00:35,395 Lean. Something lean. 1158 01:00:35,397 --> 01:00:37,063 Get back and lean? 1159 01:00:37,065 --> 01:00:38,398 Gig... That says, "giggle," though. 1160 01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:39,431 Giggle lean. 1161 01:00:39,433 --> 01:00:41,101 - Giggle? - Giggle and lean? 1162 01:00:41,103 --> 01:00:42,469 Jiggle. 1163 01:00:42,471 --> 01:00:44,137 - Huh? - What? 1164 01:00:44,139 --> 01:00:45,975 Jiggle. 1165 01:00:49,011 --> 01:00:51,848 Get back at the Morrisettes for the jiggle test. 1166 01:00:52,915 --> 01:00:54,146 You girls made it 1167 01:00:54,148 --> 01:00:57,284 to the final cut of the Morrisettes. 1168 01:00:57,286 --> 01:01:02,191 The Morrisettes have been an institution since what year? 1169 01:01:03,292 --> 01:01:06,226 Um, 2010. 1170 01:01:06,228 --> 01:01:08,295 Correct. 1171 01:01:08,297 --> 01:01:11,264 A Morrisette is a model of health, 1172 01:01:11,266 --> 01:01:16,402 beauty, athleticism, and what? 1173 01:01:16,404 --> 01:01:18,237 Sisterhood. 1174 01:01:18,239 --> 01:01:20,976 Yes, sisterhood. 1175 01:01:22,944 --> 01:01:28,547 It is the highest honor you can imagine to be a Morrisette. 1176 01:01:28,549 --> 01:01:32,853 Do you have what it takes to be one of us? 1177 01:01:32,855 --> 01:01:34,087 - Yes. - Yes. 1178 01:01:34,089 --> 01:01:35,922 - We can't hear you. - Yes! 1179 01:01:35,924 --> 01:01:37,357 Are you willing to do what it takes? 1180 01:01:37,359 --> 01:01:38,293 - Yes! - Yes! 1181 01:01:40,061 --> 01:01:45,168 Strip down to your bra and underwear. 1182 01:01:52,040 --> 01:01:54,509 Don't worry. We've got this. 1183 01:02:25,406 --> 01:02:27,542 (TOGETHER) Now do the cheer. 1184 01:02:29,011 --> 01:02:31,677 Five, six, seven, eight. 1185 01:02:31,679 --> 01:02:34,413 ♪ Morrisettes are everywhere ♪ 1186 01:02:34,415 --> 01:02:36,516 ♪ Mariners fight like they don't care ♪ 1187 01:02:36,518 --> 01:02:39,184 ♪ Twerking it, working it, from the right ♪ 1188 01:02:39,186 --> 01:02:41,520 ♪ Hey, Mariners, go take up the fight ♪ 1189 01:02:41,522 --> 01:02:43,255 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna bring it ♪ 1190 01:02:43,257 --> 01:02:44,556 Flashlights over here. 1191 01:02:44,558 --> 01:02:46,592 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna swing it ♪ 1192 01:02:46,594 --> 01:02:48,929 ♪ The Morrisettes are gonna fire it up ♪ 1193 01:02:48,931 --> 01:02:51,130 ♪ And the Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1194 01:02:51,132 --> 01:02:54,134 ♪ The Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1195 01:02:54,136 --> 01:02:56,168 ♪ The Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1196 01:02:56,170 --> 01:02:59,239 ♪ The Mariners are gonna triumph ♪ 1197 01:02:59,241 --> 01:03:01,440 (CHEERING FADES) 1198 01:03:01,442 --> 01:03:03,378 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1199 01:03:21,630 --> 01:03:23,432 (MORRISETTES WHISPERING) 1200 01:03:27,235 --> 01:03:31,003 After careful consideration, 1201 01:03:31,005 --> 01:03:33,408 we've come to a decision. 1202 01:03:34,976 --> 01:03:40,447 Isabella, you did not pass the jiggle test. 1203 01:03:40,449 --> 01:03:43,717 We can't offer you a spot on the Morrisettes. 1204 01:03:43,719 --> 01:03:46,989 You're welcome to go on a diet and try out again next year. 1205 01:03:50,292 --> 01:03:54,126 But we do caution you not to expose our selection methods, 1206 01:03:54,128 --> 01:03:57,632 or we will expose your audition tape as well. 1207 01:03:59,333 --> 01:04:02,038 Way to go, Jell-O. 1208 01:04:08,643 --> 01:04:11,744 So, what do you think of my plan? 1209 01:04:11,746 --> 01:04:15,150 I mean, they're your people, subhuman as they are. 1210 01:04:17,018 --> 01:04:18,751 They're gonna hate you for doing this. 1211 01:04:18,753 --> 01:04:21,020 Yeah, I don't really care. 1212 01:04:21,022 --> 01:04:25,026 It's almost graduation, and I never have to see them again. 1213 01:04:29,297 --> 01:04:30,565 Then I'm in. 1214 01:04:31,699 --> 01:04:34,534 Didn't know you had it in you. 1215 01:04:34,536 --> 01:04:38,474 Oh, Sophie, can you hack the lights above the court? 1216 01:04:42,610 --> 01:04:43,944 Sophie? 1217 01:04:47,815 --> 01:04:52,184 I'm sorry, but I can't do this. 1218 01:04:52,186 --> 01:04:54,587 Why? 1219 01:04:54,589 --> 01:04:57,724 Maybe this isn't a big deal for you guys. 1220 01:04:57,726 --> 01:05:01,427 I mean, you guys do these types of things all the time. 1221 01:05:01,429 --> 01:05:03,529 But it is for me. 1222 01:05:03,531 --> 01:05:05,598 We said we'd do the list... 1223 01:05:05,600 --> 01:05:07,132 for Honor. 1224 01:05:07,134 --> 01:05:09,701 I know, but don't guilt me out about Honor. 1225 01:05:09,703 --> 01:05:11,673 This isn't exactly on the list. 1226 01:05:13,607 --> 01:05:16,409 If anyone should have reservations, it's me. 1227 01:05:16,411 --> 01:05:17,811 I'm the one with the jiggly bits. 1228 01:05:17,813 --> 01:05:19,579 Oh, shut up. You're hot. 1229 01:05:19,581 --> 01:05:21,313 And Sophie, you are, too. 1230 01:05:21,315 --> 01:05:23,349 Sophie, you should be proud of your body. 1231 01:05:23,351 --> 01:05:28,087 This isn't about me being proud of my body. 1232 01:05:28,089 --> 01:05:30,425 I'm not doing this, because I'm not a slut! 1233 01:05:32,393 --> 01:05:33,726 Whoa. 1234 01:05:33,728 --> 01:05:37,099 Yeah, okay, tell us how you really feel. 1235 01:05:38,232 --> 01:05:40,599 - I'm sorry. - Don't be. 1236 01:05:40,601 --> 01:05:42,268 If this makes me a slut, 1237 01:05:42,270 --> 01:05:45,804 then I am the biggest, sloppiest one of them all. 1238 01:05:45,806 --> 01:05:48,208 I didn't mean for it to come out like that. 1239 01:05:48,210 --> 01:05:49,875 You know, for someone who hasn't had sex, 1240 01:05:49,877 --> 01:05:51,677 you certainly make everything about it. 1241 01:05:51,679 --> 01:05:53,712 You're always teasing me about being a virgin. 1242 01:05:53,714 --> 01:05:55,717 Yeah, you judge me for not being one. 1243 01:05:57,652 --> 01:06:00,520 Listen. I don't care that you haven't had sex. 1244 01:06:00,522 --> 01:06:04,424 I think it's awesome that you're choosing that. 1245 01:06:04,426 --> 01:06:07,626 Be you, but I am so sick of you judging me. 1246 01:06:07,628 --> 01:06:09,565 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1247 01:06:26,181 --> 01:06:27,514 Oh, hey, Sophie. 1248 01:06:27,516 --> 01:06:29,782 Yeah. 1249 01:06:29,784 --> 01:06:31,817 Sorry for interrupting. 1250 01:06:31,819 --> 01:06:33,822 Oh, no, don't worry about it. 1251 01:06:35,857 --> 01:06:38,458 I... I--I didn't know you were so health conscious. 1252 01:06:38,460 --> 01:06:39,858 Oh, yeah, no one realizes 1253 01:06:39,860 --> 01:06:41,860 how in shape you've gotta be to be the mascot. 1254 01:06:41,862 --> 01:06:43,630 You know, a lot of running and jumping. 1255 01:06:43,632 --> 01:06:46,699 Yeah, that... that's cool you take it so seriously. 1256 01:06:46,701 --> 01:06:48,902 Yeah, well, games can get intense. 1257 01:06:48,904 --> 01:06:51,170 Uh, yeah, actually that's kind of 1258 01:06:51,172 --> 01:06:52,505 what I wanted to ask you about. 1259 01:06:52,507 --> 01:06:54,541 Another favor? Yes. 1260 01:06:54,543 --> 01:06:57,677 Uh, but you don't even know what I'm gonna ask you. 1261 01:06:57,679 --> 01:06:59,179 Well, the answer's yes, 1262 01:06:59,181 --> 01:07:02,581 but only if you'll go to prom with me. 1263 01:07:02,583 --> 01:07:04,217 PLAYER: We got you! 1264 01:07:04,219 --> 01:07:06,755 - Go! Go! - Heads up! Heads up! 1265 01:07:08,790 --> 01:07:10,757 Okay, yeah. 1266 01:07:10,759 --> 01:07:12,394 Awesome. 1267 01:07:17,232 --> 01:07:20,703 You... You didn't tell me what the favor was. 1268 01:07:26,308 --> 01:07:27,407 I'm in. 1269 01:07:27,409 --> 01:07:29,875 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1270 01:07:29,877 --> 01:07:31,813 (SCATTERED CHEERING) 1271 01:07:50,565 --> 01:07:52,467 (CHEERING) 1272 01:07:53,534 --> 01:07:54,703 Go, Mariners! 1273 01:07:56,371 --> 01:07:58,206 (CROWD CHEERING) 1274 01:08:00,241 --> 01:08:01,576 (CELLPHONE DINGS) 1275 01:08:08,415 --> 01:08:09,514 Hey. 1276 01:08:09,516 --> 01:08:12,418 Hey. Uh, I grabbed your uniform. 1277 01:08:12,420 --> 01:08:13,987 Thanks. 1278 01:08:13,989 --> 01:08:16,456 (SIGHS) 1279 01:08:16,458 --> 01:08:17,756 I am so nervous. 1280 01:08:17,758 --> 01:08:19,626 Oh, yeah. I've peed, like, eight times. 1281 01:08:19,628 --> 01:08:20,659 (BOTH LAUGH) 1282 01:08:20,661 --> 01:08:21,829 That's a lot, even for you. 1283 01:08:25,866 --> 01:08:27,535 (COUGHS) 1284 01:08:29,437 --> 01:08:30,737 Piper. 1285 01:08:30,739 --> 01:08:32,372 Yeah? 1286 01:08:32,374 --> 01:08:33,876 It's not good. 1287 01:08:38,946 --> 01:08:40,748 Just in case we don't live to tell... 1288 01:08:42,316 --> 01:08:44,650 this one isn't just for Honor. 1289 01:08:44,652 --> 01:08:45,954 It's for you. 1290 01:08:49,590 --> 01:08:51,591 (CELLPHONE DINGS) 1291 01:08:51,593 --> 01:08:54,060 I think you should be the one to cross it off the list. 1292 01:08:54,062 --> 01:08:55,364 Thanks. 1293 01:08:56,931 --> 01:08:59,666 (CELLPHONE DINGS) 1294 01:08:59,668 --> 01:09:01,704 Someone really wants your attention. 1295 01:09:02,771 --> 01:09:04,804 Is it Ball Sac on Ice? 1296 01:09:04,806 --> 01:09:06,909 (LAUGHS) 1297 01:09:08,743 --> 01:09:09,942 Hey. 1298 01:09:09,944 --> 01:09:11,679 Never thought I'd be doing this. 1299 01:09:15,883 --> 01:09:17,750 Ladies and gentlemen, 1300 01:09:17,752 --> 01:09:20,686 please welcome the Morrisettes of Morris High! 1301 01:09:20,688 --> 01:09:22,790 (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) 1302 01:09:27,896 --> 01:09:30,630 Five, six, seven, eight. 1303 01:09:30,632 --> 01:09:32,598 ♪ Morrisettes are everywhere ♪ 1304 01:09:32,600 --> 01:09:34,934 ♪ Mariners fight like they don't care ♪ 1305 01:09:34,936 --> 01:09:36,903 ♪ Twerking it, working it from the right ♪ 1306 01:09:36,905 --> 01:09:39,338 ♪ Hey, Mariners, go take up the fight ♪ 1307 01:09:39,340 --> 01:09:41,440 ♪ The Morrisettes, they're gonna bring it ♪ 1308 01:09:41,442 --> 01:09:42,774 - ♪ The Morrisettes are... ♪ - (CROWD MURMURING) 1309 01:09:42,776 --> 01:09:44,042 (OVER P.A.) The Morrisettes use blackmail 1310 01:09:44,044 --> 01:09:46,778 and body shaming as audition tactics. 1311 01:09:46,780 --> 01:09:48,648 - What? - We say no more! 1312 01:09:48,650 --> 01:09:50,518 What's going on? 1313 01:09:57,892 --> 01:09:59,926 (AARON BEAT-BOXING) 1314 01:09:59,928 --> 01:10:01,594 Ahh... 1315 01:10:01,596 --> 01:10:04,130 ♪ Oh, I say, "Hello," you say, "Hell, no" ♪ 1316 01:10:04,132 --> 01:10:06,399 ♪ I say, "Hello," you say, "Hell, no" ♪ 1317 01:10:06,401 --> 01:10:08,568 ♪ We won't take no more of this, hell, no ♪ 1318 01:10:08,570 --> 01:10:10,536 ♪ You can't take us anywhere ♪ 1319 01:10:10,538 --> 01:10:12,838 ♪ 'Cause we jiggle, jiggle, jiggle like we just don't care ♪ 1320 01:10:12,840 --> 01:10:14,474 ♪ Wiggling, jiggling to the right ♪ 1321 01:10:14,476 --> 01:10:15,975 - (CROWD CHEERING) - ♪ If you wanna swipe left ♪ 1322 01:10:15,977 --> 01:10:17,609 ♪ Better put up a fight ♪ 1323 01:10:17,611 --> 01:10:19,412 ♪ Don't be afraid, 'cause we gorgeous ♪ 1324 01:10:19,414 --> 01:10:21,613 ♪ Don't be ashamed, 'cause we're serious ♪ 1325 01:10:21,615 --> 01:10:23,582 ♪ This is no game, not faking this ♪ 1326 01:10:23,584 --> 01:10:25,717 ♪ We're gonna make you look ridiculous ♪ 1327 01:10:25,719 --> 01:10:27,586 ♪ We're gonna make you look ridiculous ♪ 1328 01:10:27,588 --> 01:10:29,855 ♪ We're gonna make you look ridiculous ♪ 1329 01:10:29,857 --> 01:10:32,125 ♪ We're gonna make you look ridiculous ♪ 1330 01:10:32,127 --> 01:10:34,693 ♪ We say, "Hello," you say, "Hell, no" ♪ 1331 01:10:34,695 --> 01:10:36,895 ♪ We say, "Hello," you say, "Hell, no" ♪ 1332 01:10:36,897 --> 01:10:39,064 ♪ Hello, hell, no, hello, hell, no ♪ 1333 01:10:39,066 --> 01:10:42,702 ♪ We won't take no more of this, hell, no! ♪ 1334 01:10:42,704 --> 01:10:45,037 ♪ If you wanna feel the heat, you gotta bring it ♪ 1335 01:10:45,039 --> 01:10:47,573 ♪ If you wanna see the moves, you gotta swing it ♪ 1336 01:10:47,575 --> 01:10:49,908 ♪ If you want a real girl, you gotta try it ♪ 1337 01:10:49,910 --> 01:10:52,010 ♪ 'Cause these little bitches gonna riot ♪ 1338 01:10:52,012 --> 01:10:54,146 ♪ 'Cause these little bitches gonna riot ♪ 1339 01:10:54,148 --> 01:10:56,149 ♪ 'Cause these little bitches gonna riot ♪ 1340 01:10:56,151 --> 01:10:58,518 ♪ 'Cause these little bitches gonna riot! ♪ 1341 01:10:58,520 --> 01:11:00,787 ♪ 'Cause these little bitches gonna riot! ♪ 1342 01:11:00,789 --> 01:11:03,021 ♪ A-B-C-D-G-A-F ♪ 1343 01:11:03,023 --> 01:11:05,190 ♪ A-B-C-D-G-A-F! ♪ 1344 01:11:05,192 --> 01:11:08,396 (CROWD GASPING, YELLING) 1345 01:11:13,802 --> 01:11:17,170 Hey, Leah, go ahead. 1346 01:11:17,172 --> 01:11:18,637 Post my video. 1347 01:11:18,639 --> 01:11:20,676 (CROWD CHEERING, YELLING) 1348 01:11:26,713 --> 01:11:29,650 - (MUSIC PLAYING) - (LAUGHING) 1349 01:11:33,987 --> 01:11:36,721 (SCREAMING) 1350 01:11:36,723 --> 01:11:37,759 We did it! 1351 01:11:39,060 --> 01:11:42,194 Pants. Put on these pants. Pants. 1352 01:11:42,196 --> 01:11:43,632 (SCREAMS) 1353 01:11:45,165 --> 01:11:48,870 ♪ Stood, my dear, oh, mother ♪ 1354 01:11:50,204 --> 01:11:53,072 ♪ Oh, Lord, just keep on ♪ 1355 01:11:53,074 --> 01:11:57,111 ♪ Keep on screaming and a-crying ♪ 1356 01:11:58,480 --> 01:12:00,078 ♪ Oh, Lord, I wonder... ♪ 1357 01:12:00,080 --> 01:12:01,747 That was epic. 1358 01:12:01,749 --> 01:12:03,683 Most amazing thing I've ever done. 1359 01:12:03,685 --> 01:12:05,187 After tonight, Piper Morley, you'll be a legend. 1360 01:12:07,054 --> 01:12:10,021 - Go, go, go, go! - ♪ Oh, Lord ♪ 1361 01:12:10,023 --> 01:12:12,558 ♪ They're in the weather... ♪ 1362 01:12:12,560 --> 01:12:13,926 (CELLPHONE RINGS) 1363 01:12:13,928 --> 01:12:15,627 Hi, Piper. 1364 01:12:15,629 --> 01:12:17,095 Where are you? 1365 01:12:17,097 --> 01:12:19,998 Uh, it's us again. We were at the playground. 1366 01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:22,868 Now we have to walk Sophie home, so just call me when you can. 1367 01:12:22,870 --> 01:12:24,539 - Bye. - Hey. 1368 01:12:27,075 --> 01:12:29,975 Hey, it's... it's Isabella, right? 1369 01:12:29,977 --> 01:12:32,211 Saw your cheer at halftime. 1370 01:12:32,213 --> 01:12:33,749 Damn. 1371 01:12:34,982 --> 01:12:37,216 You got some big brass ovaries. 1372 01:12:37,218 --> 01:12:38,951 See you in a whole different light. 1373 01:12:38,953 --> 01:12:39,985 Thanks. 1374 01:12:39,987 --> 01:12:41,186 Bye. Good night. 1375 01:12:41,188 --> 01:12:43,855 Hey, so, uh, we wanna volunteer 1376 01:12:43,857 --> 01:12:45,824 to be your next conquests, 1377 01:12:45,826 --> 01:12:47,896 get our swerve on with the curvy one. 1378 01:12:51,199 --> 01:12:53,198 Are you propositioning me? 1379 01:12:53,200 --> 01:12:56,269 Hey, don't act so shocked. 1380 01:12:56,271 --> 01:12:57,636 I mean, you have your tongue 1381 01:12:57,638 --> 01:12:58,703 down everyone's throat at school, 1382 01:12:58,705 --> 01:13:00,773 and you, uh, advertised yourself 1383 01:13:00,775 --> 01:13:02,841 in a pretty major way tonight. 1384 01:13:02,843 --> 01:13:06,681 All I'm saying is I'm interested in buying it. 1385 01:13:08,749 --> 01:13:12,284 I can wear or not wear whatever I want. 1386 01:13:12,286 --> 01:13:13,952 (LAUGHS) 1387 01:13:13,954 --> 01:13:16,588 And I can hook up with who I want when I want. 1388 01:13:16,590 --> 01:13:20,592 Tonight was the proudest moment in my entire stupid little life, 1389 01:13:20,594 --> 01:13:23,028 and apparently you guys didn't get the point. 1390 01:13:23,030 --> 01:13:24,663 (LAUGHS) 1391 01:13:24,665 --> 01:13:26,299 So maybe this will help. 1392 01:13:26,301 --> 01:13:28,734 (YELLING) 1393 01:13:28,736 --> 01:13:30,903 What, are you kidding me?! 1394 01:13:30,905 --> 01:13:33,305 - (WINCING) - Hey, you got daddy issues! 1395 01:13:33,307 --> 01:13:36,177 - Oh, my God. - Agh! 1396 01:13:38,679 --> 01:13:40,613 Don't say anything. 1397 01:13:40,615 --> 01:13:43,949 I was gonna say that was awesome! 1398 01:13:43,951 --> 01:13:45,954 Isabella! 1399 01:13:50,223 --> 01:13:52,123 This may be the final two weeks 1400 01:13:52,125 --> 01:13:54,225 of your life at this school, but do not think 1401 01:13:54,227 --> 01:13:56,962 for one moment that your little halftime 1402 01:13:56,964 --> 01:13:59,998 burlesque routine will go unpunished. 1403 01:14:00,000 --> 01:14:02,134 Now tell me who the third girl was 1404 01:14:02,136 --> 01:14:03,638 who stripped wearing the mascot head. 1405 01:14:06,340 --> 01:14:08,608 Aaron Masey is coming in right after you, 1406 01:14:08,610 --> 01:14:10,679 so you girls better be the one to tell me. 1407 01:14:12,379 --> 01:14:15,213 Well, maybe denying you the chance to go to prom 1408 01:14:15,215 --> 01:14:16,916 will have you speaking up. 1409 01:14:16,918 --> 01:14:18,253 I don't even wanna go to prom. 1410 01:14:19,387 --> 01:14:21,787 Then you can find yourself 1411 01:14:21,789 --> 01:14:24,055 on the prom clean-up committee. 1412 01:14:24,057 --> 01:14:26,158 Gregory, put Isabella Walker 1413 01:14:26,160 --> 01:14:28,360 on the prom clean-up committee, please. 1414 01:14:28,362 --> 01:14:30,095 Is this even necessary? 1415 01:14:30,097 --> 01:14:32,131 The girls are over 18. 1416 01:14:32,133 --> 01:14:34,734 It was a song of political protest, 1417 01:14:34,736 --> 01:14:36,368 and let me say, if they were boys, 1418 01:14:36,370 --> 01:14:37,737 would we even be in here? 1419 01:14:37,739 --> 01:14:38,871 It is very necessary, 1420 01:14:38,873 --> 01:14:40,676 and I will get to the bottom of this. 1421 01:14:42,243 --> 01:14:44,743 Piper, was Dillon Walker part of this? 1422 01:14:44,745 --> 01:14:48,680 You were seen in his car afterward before speeding off. 1423 01:14:48,682 --> 01:14:52,083 No. Um, uh, no. 1424 01:14:52,085 --> 01:14:54,119 Um, Dillon wasn't. 1425 01:14:54,121 --> 01:14:56,788 He... We were, uh... 1426 01:14:56,790 --> 01:14:58,157 He just gave me a ride. 1427 01:14:58,159 --> 01:15:00,161 That's where you were? 1428 01:15:01,262 --> 01:15:02,894 We waited for you for hours. 1429 01:15:02,896 --> 01:15:05,230 I just needed to get away. I just got in his car. 1430 01:15:05,232 --> 01:15:06,799 Well, that's called aiding and abetting. 1431 01:15:06,801 --> 01:15:09,167 Can we just get to the point, Principal Logan? 1432 01:15:09,169 --> 01:15:11,269 This is not something my son would orchestrate, 1433 01:15:11,271 --> 01:15:12,771 and Isabella would never, in a million years... 1434 01:15:12,773 --> 01:15:14,172 Wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa, 1435 01:15:14,174 --> 01:15:15,811 You're not suggesting Piper's all to blame? 1436 01:15:18,111 --> 01:15:21,247 Excuse me. Who are you? 1437 01:15:21,249 --> 01:15:23,114 I'm Colin. 1438 01:15:23,116 --> 01:15:24,151 I'm Colin Flynn. 1439 01:15:25,687 --> 01:15:29,020 Yes, but who are you? 1440 01:15:29,022 --> 01:15:30,956 Why are you here? 1441 01:15:30,958 --> 01:15:34,060 Well, Piper, hi. It's nice to finally meet you. 1442 01:15:34,062 --> 01:15:35,394 I'm your mom's fiancé. 1443 01:15:35,396 --> 01:15:37,128 No, no, this isn't happening. 1444 01:15:37,130 --> 01:15:38,863 Let's just all calm down here. 1445 01:15:38,865 --> 01:15:40,699 Okay? Let's just take a deep breath, 1446 01:15:40,701 --> 01:15:43,469 get back to what we're talking about, please. 1447 01:15:43,471 --> 01:15:46,171 - Hi. - Oh, my God. Hi. 1448 01:15:46,173 --> 01:15:48,707 Piper, I... Colin, what are you doing here? 1449 01:15:48,709 --> 01:15:50,341 Well, they called me, 'cause they couldn't find you. 1450 01:15:50,343 --> 01:15:52,243 Yeah, and I apologize. I was in court. 1451 01:15:52,245 --> 01:15:54,246 Well, it's nice to see you got your priorities straight, 1452 01:15:54,248 --> 01:15:56,082 - as always. - You know what? Take it easy. 1453 01:15:56,084 --> 01:15:57,315 At least I'm sober. 1454 01:15:57,317 --> 01:15:58,884 I'm taking it easy, huh? 1455 01:15:58,886 --> 01:16:00,885 Everyone, please. 1456 01:16:00,887 --> 01:16:02,220 There's no need to be so abrasive. 1457 01:16:02,222 --> 01:16:04,355 Are you defending her? That is so typical. 1458 01:16:04,357 --> 01:16:07,259 Abrasive? (LAUGHS) 1459 01:16:07,261 --> 01:16:09,194 Who's abrasive, Mike? 1460 01:16:09,196 --> 01:16:10,762 You slept with my wife. 1461 01:16:10,764 --> 01:16:12,931 - Oh, my God. - I mean, when she was my wife 1462 01:16:12,933 --> 01:16:14,399 and before she slept with this douche bag. 1463 01:16:14,401 --> 01:16:15,967 - Okay. - What? 1464 01:16:15,969 --> 01:16:17,970 I mean, come on. What kind of... I'm not a man? 1465 01:16:17,972 --> 01:16:19,971 What kind of man wears a tank top in public? 1466 01:16:19,973 --> 01:16:21,506 - What? - I did see Bradley Cooper 1467 01:16:21,508 --> 01:16:23,509 wearing a tank top yesterday at happy hour. 1468 01:16:23,511 --> 01:16:25,778 It does work on the right kind of man. 1469 01:16:25,780 --> 01:16:28,180 - (LAUGHING) - Thank you. 1470 01:16:28,182 --> 01:16:30,049 Oh, my God. 1471 01:16:30,051 --> 01:16:31,751 I just put two and two together. 1472 01:16:31,753 --> 01:16:35,787 You, you are BMyBae2night. 1473 01:16:35,789 --> 01:16:37,021 (LAUGHING) 1474 01:16:37,023 --> 01:16:39,358 - How... - Oh, my God, this is great. 1475 01:16:39,360 --> 01:16:41,260 That is so good. 1476 01:16:41,262 --> 01:16:44,462 Congratulations. 1477 01:16:44,464 --> 01:16:45,900 You deserve all of it. 1478 01:16:51,772 --> 01:16:52,807 Piper. 1479 01:16:54,075 --> 01:16:55,940 (OVER P.A.) Good morning, Mariners. 1480 01:16:55,942 --> 01:16:57,542 - A reminder to all seniors... - Isabella, wait! 1481 01:16:57,544 --> 01:16:59,912 deposits for cap and gown must be received by tomorrow. 1482 01:16:59,914 --> 01:17:01,116 Are you sleeping with Dillon? 1483 01:17:02,215 --> 01:17:03,448 Just let me explain. 1484 01:17:03,450 --> 01:17:05,184 Explain what? 1485 01:17:05,186 --> 01:17:07,385 It's written all over your face. 1486 01:17:07,387 --> 01:17:09,954 Yes, or no? 1487 01:17:09,956 --> 01:17:12,390 Is my brother Ball Sac on Ice? 1488 01:17:12,392 --> 01:17:14,295 (LAUGHTER) 1489 01:17:15,463 --> 01:17:16,831 Yes. 1490 01:17:18,932 --> 01:17:20,099 Isabella! 1491 01:17:20,101 --> 01:17:22,036 (LAUGHTER) 1492 01:17:27,842 --> 01:17:29,241 (KEYS CLATTER) 1493 01:17:29,243 --> 01:17:30,344 Isabella! 1494 01:17:32,045 --> 01:17:34,913 You know what? I don't care. 1495 01:17:34,915 --> 01:17:37,349 School's almost over, and I never have to see you again. 1496 01:17:37,351 --> 01:17:40,019 Oh, of course. Just walk away. 1497 01:17:40,021 --> 01:17:41,886 Yeah, that's what you did with our parents. 1498 01:17:41,888 --> 01:17:44,155 We were going through the same thing, 1499 01:17:44,157 --> 01:17:47,560 but you got to keep your family, and I got nothing. 1500 01:17:47,562 --> 01:17:49,394 Well, my dad's moving out, and you're hooking up 1501 01:17:49,396 --> 01:17:50,930 with my brother, so I call bullshit. 1502 01:17:50,932 --> 01:17:53,198 I cannot believe you two. 1503 01:17:53,200 --> 01:17:56,100 All this time has passed, 1504 01:17:56,102 --> 01:17:57,336 Honor is dead, 1505 01:17:57,338 --> 01:17:59,141 and you still can't let it go! 1506 01:18:00,975 --> 01:18:03,943 This is the reason our friendship broke up, 1507 01:18:03,945 --> 01:18:05,845 not because of something your parents did. 1508 01:18:05,847 --> 01:18:08,613 You can't even admit you're the mystery mascot stripper. 1509 01:18:08,615 --> 01:18:10,482 Don't pretend you have anything figured out. 1510 01:18:10,484 --> 01:18:13,551 I can't get suspended. After that party, my parents... 1511 01:18:13,553 --> 01:18:15,954 Oh, forget it. I don't even want you on my side. 1512 01:18:15,956 --> 01:18:17,122 Oh, my God. 1513 01:18:17,124 --> 01:18:18,991 I hate you both. 1514 01:18:18,993 --> 01:18:21,260 You know what? Fuck the list! 1515 01:18:21,262 --> 01:18:23,394 What? 1516 01:18:23,396 --> 01:18:24,462 Oh, my God. 1517 01:18:24,464 --> 01:18:26,034 Isabella, you don't mean that! 1518 01:18:33,406 --> 01:18:36,011 ♪ You've been running ♪ 1519 01:18:39,045 --> 01:18:40,511 - ♪ Running all your life ♪ - No longer. 1520 01:18:40,513 --> 01:18:43,314 Put 'em down. Put 'em down. 1521 01:18:43,316 --> 01:18:45,917 You were supposed to be pillars at our school. 1522 01:18:45,919 --> 01:18:47,454 Very disappointed. 1523 01:18:50,357 --> 01:18:53,160 ♪ You've been running ♪ 1524 01:18:55,362 --> 01:18:56,528 (CELLPHONE BUZZING) 1525 01:18:56,530 --> 01:18:59,267 ♪ Until tonight ♪ 1526 01:19:03,536 --> 01:19:08,008 ♪ I know you're hurting ♪ 1527 01:19:10,511 --> 01:19:12,344 ♪ I know you're hurting ♪ 1528 01:19:12,346 --> 01:19:14,549 Dad, I made you a sandwich. 1529 01:19:16,517 --> 01:19:19,618 - ♪ I can see the whole world ♪ - Oh. 1530 01:19:19,620 --> 01:19:21,556 I'm not hungry, Piper. 1531 01:19:22,690 --> 01:19:25,224 ♪ I can see the stars ♪ 1532 01:19:25,226 --> 01:19:28,661 ♪ Falling down like rain ♪ 1533 01:19:28,663 --> 01:19:32,297 ♪ I can see a truth in you ♪ 1534 01:19:32,299 --> 01:19:38,205 ♪ When you move ♪ 1535 01:19:42,610 --> 01:19:47,449 ♪ I can see the whole world moving ♪ 1536 01:19:48,982 --> 01:19:52,150 ♪ I can see a truth in you ♪ 1537 01:19:52,152 --> 01:19:58,058 ♪ When you move ♪ 1538 01:20:01,495 --> 01:20:04,132 ♪ You've been running ♪ 1539 01:20:07,101 --> 01:20:09,638 ♪ Running all your life ♪ 1540 01:20:12,440 --> 01:20:14,075 (R & B PLAYING) 1541 01:20:15,241 --> 01:20:17,475 To the bride and groom. 1542 01:20:17,477 --> 01:20:18,413 (CAMERA CLICKS) 1543 01:20:20,347 --> 01:20:22,113 ♪ You're my ♪ 1544 01:20:22,115 --> 01:20:23,748 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1545 01:20:23,750 --> 01:20:25,717 ♪ You're my ♪ 1546 01:20:25,719 --> 01:20:27,653 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1547 01:20:27,655 --> 01:20:31,422 - ♪ My sweet ♪ - ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1548 01:20:31,424 --> 01:20:33,524 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1549 01:20:33,526 --> 01:20:36,028 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1550 01:20:36,030 --> 01:20:39,665 ♪ You played the part, and you won my heart ♪ 1551 01:20:39,667 --> 01:20:42,603 ♪ You sweet sugar daddy ♪ 1552 01:20:45,106 --> 01:20:47,375 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1553 01:20:49,043 --> 01:20:51,212 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1554 01:20:52,713 --> 01:20:55,016 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1555 01:20:56,650 --> 01:20:58,253 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1556 01:21:06,160 --> 01:21:10,165 - ♪ You're my ♪ - ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1557 01:21:13,801 --> 01:21:15,333 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1558 01:21:15,335 --> 01:21:17,068 ♪ I think about you in the morning ♪ 1559 01:21:17,070 --> 01:21:18,537 ♪ I think about you in the morning ♪ 1560 01:21:18,539 --> 01:21:20,104 ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1561 01:21:20,106 --> 01:21:21,540 ♪ And in the evening ♪ 1562 01:21:21,542 --> 01:21:24,143 - ♪ And in the evening ♪ - ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1563 01:21:24,145 --> 01:21:25,810 ♪ It might sound strange ♪ 1564 01:21:25,812 --> 01:21:28,212 ♪ I'd rather fight than change ♪ 1565 01:21:28,214 --> 01:21:31,085 ♪ You sweet sugar daddy ♪ 1566 01:21:32,152 --> 01:21:33,484 ♪ If I ever thought ♪ 1567 01:21:33,486 --> 01:21:36,657 ♪ I was losing your love, I would die ♪ 1568 01:21:39,226 --> 01:21:42,661 - ♪ If you ever ♪ - ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1569 01:21:42,663 --> 01:21:46,398 - ♪ Trade me, baby, never ♪ - ♪ Sugar daddy ♪ 1570 01:21:46,400 --> 01:21:48,332 - Oh, my God. - ♪ You played the part ♪ 1571 01:21:48,334 --> 01:21:50,335 - ♪ And you won my heart ♪ - Oh, my God! 1572 01:21:50,337 --> 01:21:52,203 - What the... - What are you doing? 1573 01:21:52,205 --> 01:21:54,238 What are you... I am gonna kill you. 1574 01:21:54,240 --> 01:21:56,507 What are you... What is wrong with you? 1575 01:21:56,509 --> 01:21:58,777 What is wrong with you? 1576 01:21:58,779 --> 01:22:01,747 Hey! Piper, what is wrong with you? 1577 01:22:01,749 --> 01:22:05,783 You! You are what's wrong with me! 1578 01:22:05,785 --> 01:22:07,552 What you did to dad. 1579 01:22:07,554 --> 01:22:09,354 - What you did to me. - No. 1580 01:22:09,356 --> 01:22:11,756 - You've ruined everything! - Oh, Piper, please! 1581 01:22:11,758 --> 01:22:13,524 - Oh, stop! - Uh-huh. 1582 01:22:13,526 --> 01:22:17,296 Oh, you know you're gonna get sick of BMyBae2night 1583 01:22:17,298 --> 01:22:18,630 and go on to someone else 1584 01:22:18,632 --> 01:22:20,866 who makes it seem like everything is possible. 1585 01:22:20,868 --> 01:22:22,868 But guess what? It's not gonna matter, 1586 01:22:22,870 --> 01:22:24,769 'cause the problem is you! 1587 01:22:24,771 --> 01:22:25,706 Don't you... 1588 01:22:29,442 --> 01:22:31,612 - (SOBBING) - I'm sorry. 1589 01:22:38,619 --> 01:22:40,388 Why? 1590 01:22:41,588 --> 01:22:43,590 Why did you do it? 1591 01:22:45,558 --> 01:22:49,360 I... I hate you. 1592 01:22:49,362 --> 01:22:51,896 I really do. 1593 01:22:51,898 --> 01:22:53,332 Piper... 1594 01:22:53,334 --> 01:22:57,505 You... You were supposed to be my mom. 1595 01:22:59,572 --> 01:23:00,805 Piper, I'm sorry. 1596 01:23:00,807 --> 01:23:02,306 I am sorry. 1597 01:23:02,308 --> 01:23:03,609 I'm sorry. 1598 01:23:03,611 --> 01:23:05,510 I'm... I'm... Piper. 1599 01:23:05,512 --> 01:23:06,780 (DOOR SLAMS) 1600 01:23:16,789 --> 01:23:18,759 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 1601 01:23:22,929 --> 01:23:25,663 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 1602 01:23:25,665 --> 01:23:27,368 MR. MORLEY: Piper... 1603 01:23:28,435 --> 01:23:30,205 can I come in? 1604 01:23:31,472 --> 01:23:34,273 It's just me, Dad. 1605 01:23:34,275 --> 01:23:36,244 They got another room. 1606 01:23:37,378 --> 01:23:39,211 They wanted to call security, 1607 01:23:39,213 --> 01:23:40,849 but I said I'd come and talk to you. 1608 01:24:07,473 --> 01:24:09,677 I'm really sorry. 1609 01:24:12,846 --> 01:24:15,413 I really messed up. 1610 01:24:15,415 --> 01:24:18,417 Well, you've always been precocious. 1611 01:24:18,419 --> 01:24:20,155 You get that from your mom. 1612 01:24:29,495 --> 01:24:31,665 I knew about Isabella's dad. 1613 01:24:33,968 --> 01:24:36,435 What? 1614 01:24:36,437 --> 01:24:38,970 Wh-What do you mean? 1615 01:24:38,972 --> 01:24:41,405 I, uh... 1616 01:24:41,407 --> 01:24:44,408 I was letting it go on. 1617 01:24:44,410 --> 01:24:45,943 Why? 1618 01:24:45,945 --> 01:24:47,945 I... I don't... I don't understand. 1619 01:24:47,947 --> 01:24:49,848 I was scared, 1620 01:24:49,850 --> 01:24:51,783 but I loved your mom very much, 1621 01:24:51,785 --> 01:24:53,885 and I, uh, you know, 1622 01:24:53,887 --> 01:24:55,621 I just couldn't get my shit together. 1623 01:24:55,623 --> 01:24:57,456 And I feel like I gotta tell you that, 1624 01:24:57,458 --> 01:24:58,991 because, you know, 1625 01:24:58,993 --> 01:25:01,329 I see that you blame everything on your mom. 1626 01:25:04,530 --> 01:25:05,697 I mean, look, it doesn't mean 1627 01:25:05,699 --> 01:25:08,399 I want you to pee all over my bed. 1628 01:25:08,401 --> 01:25:11,435 (LAUGHS) Felt really good. 1629 01:25:11,437 --> 01:25:13,674 My God, I bet it did. 1630 01:25:15,976 --> 01:25:18,713 Dad, I think I have a... 1631 01:25:22,383 --> 01:25:25,220 I think I have a problem with drinking. 1632 01:25:27,887 --> 01:25:30,725 I hate myself for it. 1633 01:25:47,307 --> 01:25:48,976 Let's go home. 1634 01:25:50,576 --> 01:25:51,812 Come on. 1635 01:25:53,414 --> 01:25:54,749 Let's get cleaned up. 1636 01:25:59,419 --> 01:26:01,021 Both of us. 1637 01:26:11,764 --> 01:26:14,366 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 1638 01:26:14,368 --> 01:26:16,001 Oh, my Lord. I can't believe 1639 01:26:16,003 --> 01:26:18,002 Haley thought it was a good idea to wear that. 1640 01:26:18,004 --> 01:26:20,439 Ohh. Ah, and look at her hair. 1641 01:26:20,441 --> 01:26:21,939 (SIGHS) What a shame. 1642 01:26:21,941 --> 01:26:24,009 - Sophie, look. - Look. 1643 01:26:24,011 --> 01:26:26,978 (LAUGHS) 1644 01:26:26,980 --> 01:26:28,779 Who wrote that? 1645 01:26:28,781 --> 01:26:30,717 Troy. 1646 01:26:32,686 --> 01:26:35,953 He said they did it after she stripped at the basketball game. 1647 01:26:35,955 --> 01:26:37,088 Really? 1648 01:26:37,090 --> 01:26:38,793 Yeah. 1649 01:26:52,839 --> 01:26:54,409 (WHISTLE) 1650 01:26:57,710 --> 01:27:00,679 (CELLPHONES CHIMING) 1651 01:27:00,681 --> 01:27:03,482 (GASPS) 1652 01:27:03,484 --> 01:27:05,384 Sophie. 1653 01:27:05,386 --> 01:27:07,586 Why would you do that? 1654 01:27:07,588 --> 01:27:09,523 (MAN VOCALIZING) 1655 01:27:20,133 --> 01:27:22,369 You didn't have to out yourself. 1656 01:27:23,837 --> 01:27:28,073 It wasn't fair to Isabella, Piper, you... 1657 01:27:28,075 --> 01:27:29,541 and Honor. 1658 01:27:29,543 --> 01:27:30,942 I bet Honor would have loved 1659 01:27:30,944 --> 01:27:32,413 you sticking it to the Morrisettes. 1660 01:27:35,048 --> 01:27:37,552 That's who I made the pact with. 1661 01:27:38,651 --> 01:27:39,654 Oh. 1662 01:27:40,721 --> 01:27:45,023 The last time...(SIGHS) 1663 01:27:45,025 --> 01:27:49,597 I spoke to her, we had a huge fight. 1664 01:27:51,030 --> 01:27:54,534 She broke our pact. 1665 01:27:56,536 --> 01:27:57,538 (SIGHS) 1666 01:27:59,106 --> 01:28:03,076 That's why we weren't friends anymore. 1667 01:28:06,112 --> 01:28:08,212 Now she's dead, 1668 01:28:08,214 --> 01:28:12,617 and the last thing I said to her 1669 01:28:12,619 --> 01:28:14,554 was, "You're such a slut." 1670 01:28:19,493 --> 01:28:22,730 And I just wish I could tell her I'm sorry. 1671 01:28:28,901 --> 01:28:30,837 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1672 01:29:00,167 --> 01:29:02,035 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 1673 01:29:05,239 --> 01:29:07,575 - Hey. - Hey. 1674 01:29:10,244 --> 01:29:12,143 Try your gown on yet? 1675 01:29:12,145 --> 01:29:14,682 No. Not yet. 1676 01:29:16,883 --> 01:29:19,251 Thanks for telling everyone you were the mystery stripper. 1677 01:29:19,253 --> 01:29:21,786 (LAUGHS) Wish I could wear the mascot head 1678 01:29:21,788 --> 01:29:23,787 for graduation tomorrow. 1679 01:29:23,789 --> 01:29:25,792 (DOOR OPENS) 1680 01:29:33,299 --> 01:29:34,899 Hey. 1681 01:29:34,901 --> 01:29:37,269 Why are we here? 1682 01:29:37,271 --> 01:29:39,507 We only have one more. 1683 01:29:41,141 --> 01:29:43,073 I don't care about the list. 1684 01:29:43,075 --> 01:29:45,676 Yes, you do. Okay, maybe not about me, 1685 01:29:45,678 --> 01:29:46,980 but you care about Honor. 1686 01:29:53,986 --> 01:29:55,121 No. 1687 01:29:57,657 --> 01:29:59,694 Sorry, not sorry. 1688 01:30:01,194 --> 01:30:04,898 Just no. 1689 01:30:09,669 --> 01:30:11,571 (DOOR CLOSES) 1690 01:30:13,173 --> 01:30:15,607 I'll come with you. 1691 01:30:15,609 --> 01:30:17,708 Thanks. 1692 01:30:17,710 --> 01:30:19,646 (MUSIC PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES) 1693 01:30:24,785 --> 01:30:26,184 (CAR STEREO BLARING MUSIC) 1694 01:30:26,186 --> 01:30:30,255 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1695 01:30:30,257 --> 01:30:34,759 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1696 01:30:34,761 --> 01:30:36,094 ♪ We've got all the time... ♪ 1697 01:30:36,096 --> 01:30:37,761 What are you doing? 1698 01:30:37,763 --> 01:30:39,764 You wouldn't call me back, so... 1699 01:30:39,766 --> 01:30:42,069 Also I wanted to pick up mom's leftovers. 1700 01:30:43,236 --> 01:30:45,069 Asshole. 1701 01:30:45,071 --> 01:30:47,338 I know. I am. 1702 01:30:47,340 --> 01:30:48,707 I'm really sorry. 1703 01:30:48,709 --> 01:30:51,242 Hey! Hey, sport. Wanna turn it down? 1704 01:30:51,244 --> 01:30:52,676 Just a second, okay? 1705 01:30:52,678 --> 01:30:55,346 I'm trying to apologize to my sister. 1706 01:30:55,348 --> 01:30:58,216 - It's almost 2 A.M. - Yeah, I know. 1707 01:30:58,218 --> 01:31:00,918 I've slept with her best friend and been a crap brother. 1708 01:31:00,920 --> 01:31:02,287 She's had to deal with everything alone. 1709 01:31:02,289 --> 01:31:04,288 Yeah, and I have to get up in a couple of hours. 1710 01:31:04,290 --> 01:31:05,790 Cry me a river. 1711 01:31:05,792 --> 01:31:07,993 - Is that a song request? - No! 1712 01:31:07,995 --> 01:31:09,927 I'm almost done. 1713 01:31:09,929 --> 01:31:11,962 The last thing I wanna tell her 1714 01:31:11,964 --> 01:31:14,165 is that when she goes to college, 1715 01:31:14,167 --> 01:31:16,001 I'm gonna take care of mom, 1716 01:31:16,003 --> 01:31:18,670 and I'm gonna keep an eye on dad, and I'm gonna be here, 1717 01:31:18,672 --> 01:31:19,938 and she shouldn't let family shit 1718 01:31:19,940 --> 01:31:21,372 get in the way of friendship. 1719 01:31:21,374 --> 01:31:23,975 Oh, for God's sakes. 1720 01:31:23,977 --> 01:31:24,975 (DOOR SLAMS) 1721 01:31:24,977 --> 01:31:26,778 I've screwed up, 1722 01:31:26,780 --> 01:31:28,912 - and I hope she forgives me. - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1723 01:31:28,914 --> 01:31:30,814 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1724 01:31:30,816 --> 01:31:32,216 ♪ It's okay ♪ 1725 01:31:32,218 --> 01:31:33,917 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1726 01:31:33,919 --> 01:31:36,220 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1727 01:31:36,222 --> 01:31:39,256 ♪ Don't hold back, here we go ♪ 1728 01:31:39,258 --> 01:31:42,793 ♪ We've got all the time, we will carry each other ♪ 1729 01:31:42,795 --> 01:31:44,929 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1730 01:31:44,931 --> 01:31:47,265 ♪ I will never let you go ♪ 1731 01:31:47,267 --> 01:31:51,672 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 1732 01:31:54,206 --> 01:31:56,110 (LAUGHS) 1733 01:31:59,745 --> 01:32:01,779 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1734 01:32:01,781 --> 01:32:04,416 - ♪ I will never let you go ♪ - Ready? 1735 01:32:04,418 --> 01:32:08,019 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 1736 01:32:08,021 --> 01:32:09,223 Ready. 1737 01:32:19,199 --> 01:32:20,901 What'd I miss? 1738 01:32:22,134 --> 01:32:23,902 Just the dancing part. 1739 01:32:23,904 --> 01:32:26,938 You guys can't dance for shit. 1740 01:32:26,940 --> 01:32:28,808 (LAUGHS) 1741 01:32:38,351 --> 01:32:41,252 I missed you so much. 1742 01:32:41,254 --> 01:32:43,057 Come here. 1743 01:32:53,432 --> 01:32:55,833 Now it's Honor's turn. 1744 01:32:55,835 --> 01:32:56,904 Yeah. 1745 01:33:13,085 --> 01:33:14,786 Wow. 1746 01:33:14,788 --> 01:33:16,287 A grown-ass person 1747 01:33:16,289 --> 01:33:19,123 reduced to this tiny, little Tupperware container. 1748 01:33:19,125 --> 01:33:22,025 Uh, no. No. 1749 01:33:22,027 --> 01:33:25,329 I think it's probably just her foot or something. 1750 01:33:25,331 --> 01:33:26,997 I don't know. 1751 01:33:26,999 --> 01:33:29,302 Her mom stole some of the ashes from the urn for us. 1752 01:34:01,334 --> 01:34:02,937 (SIGHS) 1753 01:34:04,204 --> 01:34:06,503 "No one can sum up the life of a person 1754 01:34:06,505 --> 01:34:08,840 "with a collection of poetic words 1755 01:34:08,842 --> 01:34:11,475 "as easily as a coffin or urn can contain 1756 01:34:11,477 --> 01:34:14,481 the last earthly remains of someone's existence." 1757 01:34:19,820 --> 01:34:22,220 "Does the perfectly chosen word 1758 01:34:22,222 --> 01:34:24,087 "prove how much someone was loved? 1759 01:34:24,089 --> 01:34:26,491 "Maybe. 1760 01:34:26,493 --> 01:34:30,127 "But Honor, I knew without words or poetry or song 1761 01:34:30,129 --> 01:34:31,829 "how much I loved you 1762 01:34:31,831 --> 01:34:34,435 by the gaping hole that's been torn from my heart." 1763 01:34:37,102 --> 01:34:39,072 "We love you." 1764 01:34:41,273 --> 01:34:43,841 "Sorry we weren't there for you at the end, 1765 01:34:43,843 --> 01:34:45,980 but we're here for you now." 1766 01:35:01,962 --> 01:35:04,127 Bye, Honor. 1767 01:35:04,129 --> 01:35:05,462 We will... 1768 01:35:05,464 --> 01:35:08,233 - (SNEEZES) - (GASPING) 1769 01:35:08,235 --> 01:35:10,501 Oh, shit! Oh, God. 1770 01:35:10,503 --> 01:35:12,237 That did not just happen. 1771 01:35:12,239 --> 01:35:14,505 - Oh, shit. I'm sorry! - Piper, what did you do? 1772 01:35:14,507 --> 01:35:16,207 (GASPING) 1773 01:35:16,209 --> 01:35:19,146 Oh, sorry, Honor. 1774 01:35:20,614 --> 01:35:22,883 Okay, let's try this again. 1775 01:35:24,884 --> 01:35:26,984 Bye, Honor. 1776 01:35:26,986 --> 01:35:29,056 Keep on dancing. 1777 01:35:31,258 --> 01:35:33,194 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1778 01:35:34,494 --> 01:35:36,429 (LAUGHING) 1779 01:35:50,075 --> 01:35:52,243 Hi, guys. 1780 01:35:52,245 --> 01:35:55,549 I know we haven't talked in forever. 1781 01:35:57,083 --> 01:35:59,253 But I think about you guys all the time. 1782 01:36:01,288 --> 01:36:05,593 I want to tell you everything, but I'm scared. 1783 01:36:07,060 --> 01:36:12,031 I have this heart condition. 1784 01:36:13,365 --> 01:36:15,869 There. I said it. 1785 01:36:17,370 --> 01:36:19,907 My life is now just a game of chance. 1786 01:36:22,709 --> 01:36:25,643 I'm scared about dying, 1787 01:36:25,645 --> 01:36:29,680 scared about not being the perfect one, 1788 01:36:29,682 --> 01:36:32,149 the strong one, 1789 01:36:32,151 --> 01:36:34,385 so instead I'm making this cheesy video. 1790 01:36:34,387 --> 01:36:37,424 And by the way, this is, like, the third or fourth take. 1791 01:36:39,625 --> 01:36:43,560 What I wanna say is be fierce, 1792 01:36:43,562 --> 01:36:46,631 make mistakes, fall in love. 1793 01:36:46,633 --> 01:36:49,637 Do it now, today. 1794 01:36:51,103 --> 01:36:53,104 You know, life is too short 1795 01:36:53,106 --> 01:36:55,405 to hate and hold grudges against the people you love, 1796 01:36:55,407 --> 01:36:58,609 because they're the ones you think about 1797 01:36:58,611 --> 01:37:00,411 when you're counting down 1798 01:37:00,413 --> 01:37:05,486 the years, months, weeks, days you have left. 1799 01:37:07,553 --> 01:37:11,958 I don't know if my next dance is going to be my last... 1800 01:37:15,160 --> 01:37:19,130 but I'd hate myself if I didn't get to tell you this. 1801 01:37:19,132 --> 01:37:22,300 Live your life to the fullest, 1802 01:37:22,302 --> 01:37:25,039 the way we did when we were always together. 1803 01:37:27,773 --> 01:37:31,408 Can you promise me that? (LAUGHS) 1804 01:37:31,410 --> 01:37:34,444 Come on. Like you need a guilt trip from the dead girl. 1805 01:37:34,446 --> 01:37:37,250 I mean, that's, like, if I die. 1806 01:37:39,386 --> 01:37:42,787 Go on. Make another list. 1807 01:37:42,789 --> 01:37:44,521 Do the list. 1808 01:37:44,523 --> 01:37:46,290 Love each other. Love life. 1809 01:37:46,292 --> 01:37:48,559 (ALL SCREAM) 1810 01:37:48,561 --> 01:37:51,061 Who knows? Maybe I'll be doing the list with you 1811 01:37:51,063 --> 01:37:53,765 and this is just me talking to me. 1812 01:37:53,767 --> 01:37:55,399 (CHUCKLES) 1813 01:37:55,401 --> 01:37:57,236 I miss you, Sophie. 1814 01:37:58,303 --> 01:38:00,137 I miss you, Piper. 1815 01:38:00,139 --> 01:38:01,607 I miss you, Isabella. 1816 01:38:03,642 --> 01:38:06,079 I wanna hang out again soon. 1817 01:38:13,152 --> 01:38:15,088 - (MUSIC PLAYING) - (VOCALIZING) 1818 01:38:15,090 --> 01:38:20,090 Subtitles by explosiveskull 1819 01:38:38,812 --> 01:38:41,778 ♪ Stranger than fiction ♪ 1820 01:38:41,780 --> 01:38:45,382 ♪ Still, it is true ♪ 1821 01:38:45,384 --> 01:38:48,351 ♪ I've got a vision ♪ 1822 01:38:48,353 --> 01:38:51,456 ♪ If it's cool with you ♪ 1823 01:38:51,458 --> 01:38:54,859 ♪ I'm a modern woman ♪ 1824 01:38:54,861 --> 01:38:57,795 ♪ In the modern world ♪ 1825 01:38:57,797 --> 01:39:01,364 ♪ Living is dangerous ♪ 1826 01:39:01,366 --> 01:39:04,435 ♪ When you are a girl ♪ 1827 01:39:04,437 --> 01:39:09,143 ♪ All hail ♪ 1828 01:39:10,243 --> 01:39:15,481 ♪ All hail ♪ 1829 01:39:16,583 --> 01:39:21,455 ♪ All hail ♪ 1830 01:39:23,490 --> 01:39:28,262 ♪ All hail ♪ 1831 01:39:29,728 --> 01:39:33,163 ♪ You learn by imitation ♪ 1832 01:39:33,165 --> 01:39:36,300 ♪ You've got so much to learn ♪ 1833 01:39:36,302 --> 01:39:39,604 ♪ We've got it now ♪ 1834 01:39:39,606 --> 01:39:42,739 ♪ You must wait your turn ♪ 1835 01:39:42,741 --> 01:39:46,277 ♪ Call it intuition ♪ 1836 01:39:46,279 --> 01:39:49,514 ♪ Call it what you like ♪ 1837 01:39:49,516 --> 01:39:52,416 ♪ We've got it now ♪ 1838 01:39:52,418 --> 01:39:55,452 ♪ Let's make it right ♪ 1839 01:39:55,454 --> 01:40:00,326 ♪ All hail ♪ 1840 01:40:01,828 --> 01:40:06,633 ♪ All hail ♪ 1841 01:40:08,200 --> 01:40:13,139 ♪ All hail ♪ 1842 01:40:14,641 --> 01:40:19,346 ♪ All hail ♪ 1843 01:40:21,380 --> 01:40:23,316 (VOCALIZING) 1844 01:40:33,660 --> 01:40:38,632 ♪ All hail ♪ 1845 01:40:40,400 --> 01:40:45,138 ♪ All hail ♪ 1846 01:40:46,539 --> 01:40:51,578 ♪ All hail ♪ 1847 01:40:53,245 --> 01:40:57,717 ♪ All hail ♪ 1848 01:40:59,886 --> 01:41:01,618 (NEW SONG PLAYING) 1849 01:41:01,620 --> 01:41:03,487 ♪ There's nothing I wouldn't do for you ♪ 1850 01:41:03,489 --> 01:41:05,389 ♪ That you wouldn't do for me ♪ 1851 01:41:05,391 --> 01:41:07,225 ♪ There's nothing I wouldn't say for you ♪ 1852 01:41:07,227 --> 01:41:09,260 ♪ That you wouldn't say for me ♪ 1853 01:41:09,262 --> 01:41:13,564 ♪ There's no one I'd allow to keep you far away from me ♪ 1854 01:41:13,566 --> 01:41:15,765 ♪ There's nothing I wouldn't give for you ♪ 1855 01:41:15,767 --> 01:41:17,667 ♪ That you wouldn't give for me ♪ 1856 01:41:17,669 --> 01:41:21,838 ♪ So for how many years have we wanted to say ♪ 1857 01:41:21,840 --> 01:41:25,775 ♪ That we've said it all, there's nothing left to say? ♪ 1858 01:41:25,777 --> 01:41:30,348 ♪ And for how many years have we wanted to live? ♪ 1859 01:41:30,350 --> 01:41:34,351 ♪ Now we've lived it all, and everything's okay ♪ 1860 01:41:34,353 --> 01:41:36,554 - ♪ Yeah, it's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1861 01:41:36,556 --> 01:41:38,622 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1862 01:41:38,624 --> 01:41:40,858 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1863 01:41:40,860 --> 01:41:43,027 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1864 01:41:43,029 --> 01:41:45,296 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1865 01:41:45,298 --> 01:41:47,765 ♪ Don't hold back, here we go ♪ 1866 01:41:47,767 --> 01:41:51,702 ♪ We've got all the time, we will carry each other ♪ 1867 01:41:51,704 --> 01:41:53,738 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1868 01:41:53,740 --> 01:41:56,040 ♪ I will never let you go ♪ 1869 01:41:56,042 --> 01:42:00,010 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 1870 01:42:00,012 --> 01:42:03,881 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1871 01:42:03,883 --> 01:42:08,485 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1872 01:42:08,487 --> 01:42:12,622 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1873 01:42:12,624 --> 01:42:16,860 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1874 01:42:16,862 --> 01:42:21,399 ♪ So for how many years have we wanted to say ♪ 1875 01:42:21,401 --> 01:42:25,068 ♪ That we've said it all, there's nothing left to say? ♪ 1876 01:42:25,070 --> 01:42:29,806 ♪ And for how many years have we wanted to live? ♪ 1877 01:42:29,808 --> 01:42:33,577 ♪ Now we've lived it all, and everything's okay ♪ 1878 01:42:33,579 --> 01:42:35,979 - ♪ Yeah, it's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1879 01:42:35,981 --> 01:42:38,349 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1880 01:42:38,351 --> 01:42:40,417 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1881 01:42:40,419 --> 01:42:42,619 - ♪ It's okay ♪ - ♪ It's okay ♪ 1882 01:42:42,621 --> 01:42:44,689 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1883 01:42:44,691 --> 01:42:47,358 ♪ Don't hold back, here we go ♪ 1884 01:42:47,360 --> 01:42:50,994 ♪ We've got all the time, we will carry each other ♪ 1885 01:42:50,996 --> 01:42:53,096 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1886 01:42:53,098 --> 01:42:55,765 ♪ I will never let you go ♪ 1887 01:42:55,767 --> 01:42:59,772 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 1888 01:43:16,021 --> 01:43:20,457 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1889 01:43:20,459 --> 01:43:25,028 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1890 01:43:25,030 --> 01:43:29,132 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1891 01:43:29,134 --> 01:43:34,540 ♪ We've got all the time in the world ♪ 1892 01:43:37,410 --> 01:43:39,909 ♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh ♪ 1893 01:43:39,911 --> 01:43:42,546 ♪ I will never let you go ♪ 1894 01:43:42,548 --> 01:43:46,553 ♪ I'm right here for you more than you will ever know ♪ 132035