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♪Subtitles: Arpan Bhatia, MohdAsriDungun
Gunjan. Corrected, resynced by♪ AsifAkheir
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How many stars are in the sky?
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00:01:49,371 --> 00:01:51,724
Have you ever tried to count them?
4
00:01:52,258 --> 00:01:55,229
If you started today,
it would take 6000 years to
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00:01:55,232 --> 00:01:58,907
count the stars
in our galaxy alone.
6
00:02:00,317 --> 00:02:02,613
But how many galaxies are there?
7
00:02:02,778 --> 00:02:06,264
Scientist say perhaps more than 2 billon.
8
00:02:06,822 --> 00:02:08,338
Isn't it possible
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00:02:08,455 --> 00:02:11,080
that out of so many galaxies
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there is one planet out there
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where people like us exist.
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00:02:16,348 --> 00:02:17,914
Just as we are traveling
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00:02:17,975 --> 00:02:20,413
to the moon and Mars
looking for them,
14
00:02:20,516 --> 00:02:23,414
they may also be reaching out
15
00:02:23,492 --> 00:02:25,683
looking for us.
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00:04:23,086 --> 00:04:26,067
♪ [radio]
17
00:06:13,919 --> 00:06:15,641
The thief stole...
18
00:06:15,706 --> 00:06:18,624
the remote device used
to signal the space ship.
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00:06:18,707 --> 00:06:21,503
Without it he can't go back home
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00:06:22,505 --> 00:06:24,661
He doesn't know our language
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00:06:25,038 --> 00:06:27,099
and has no friends here.
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Alone, helpless,
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he thought of only one thing:
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How can I go home now?
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00:06:34,278 --> 00:06:40,401
PK - peekay = drunk
(Hindi pun)
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00:06:56,164 --> 00:06:59,537
♪ Life is running and I go behind it
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00:06:59,624 --> 00:07:01,813
♪ New paths, all new turns
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00:07:02,258 --> 00:07:05,095
♪ To go somewhere far away
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00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:07,532
♪ Heart dreams
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00:07:08,174 --> 00:07:11,056
♪ Who knows when
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00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:14,318
♪ or which stranger, I will find
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00:07:14,342 --> 00:07:17,103
♪ Who touches my heart
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00:07:17,127 --> 00:07:20,095
♪ And makes me smile, and cry.
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00:07:39,190 --> 00:07:41,636
Extra tickets!
Anyone, extra ticket?
35
00:07:44,305 --> 00:07:46,152
Sorry, I raised my hand first.
36
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,614
But I shouted for it first,
then you...
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00:07:49,141 --> 00:07:51,922
Look I'm big fan of
Harivansh Rai Bacchan
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00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,747
But I'm also a big fan
of Amitabh Bacchan.
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00:07:55,154 --> 00:07:58,208
I started reading his poems
when I was 10.
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00:07:58,490 --> 00:08:01,529
I memorized his dialogues when
I was 5, before I could read.
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00:08:01,615 --> 00:08:03,497
Who'll take it? Have you decided?
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00:08:03,559 --> 00:08:06,052
Give it to me.
He knows nothing of poetry.
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00:08:06,145 --> 00:08:07,323
100 euros.
44
00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:09,560
A 40 euro ticket for 100?!
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00:08:09,630 --> 00:08:11,544
Black-market poetry?!
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I stood in line 6 hours.
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Time is money.
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Go, listen to your dialogues.
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00:08:23,446 --> 00:08:25,699
No, you go ahead. Ladies first.
50
00:08:27,996 --> 00:08:30,541
Just a sec.
Why don't we share a ticket?
51
00:08:30,661 --> 00:08:33,482
You can listen to poetry,
before the interval.
52
00:08:33,544 --> 00:08:36,504
Afterwards I can watch Amitabh, please.
53
00:08:38,980 --> 00:08:40,809
It's a damn good idea!
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00:08:43,299 --> 00:08:45,161
10..20..30..40
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- 50
- 6
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00:08:46,892 --> 00:08:48,636
- 96
- 96.
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00:08:49,685 --> 00:08:51,878
96. Give us a discount, friend?
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00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:55,292
We're from the same country.
Up India, bro!
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00:08:55,346 --> 00:08:58,700
"Vande Matram"... 100 euro.
[I praise thee, Mother (India)]
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00:09:00,946 --> 00:09:03,302
Extra ticket!
Anybody, extra ticket!
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00:09:04,305 --> 00:09:08,092
Uncle, could you lend us 4 euros, please?
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00:09:08,342 --> 00:09:10,911
Take my watch,
until I pay you back, tomorrow.
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00:09:10,997 --> 00:09:13,069
Please uncle, it's the last ticket.
64
00:09:13,389 --> 00:09:16,708
But it's a full house.
No more tickets, now.
65
00:09:16,966 --> 00:09:19,294
No uncle, he's scalping tickets.
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00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:21,107
That black-marketeer!
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00:09:21,442 --> 00:09:22,630
Scoundrel!
68
00:09:22,888 --> 00:09:25,513
His kind gives our country a bad name.
69
00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:26,552
True.
70
00:09:26,613 --> 00:09:29,724
Wait here, child,
I'll get you the ticket.
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00:09:31,139 --> 00:09:32,407
Thank you.
72
00:09:41,628 --> 00:09:43,042
Yes!
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00:09:54,497 --> 00:09:55,591
Uncle ..
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00:09:55,747 --> 00:09:56,513
Who?
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What do you mean who?
My ticket!
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00:09:58,767 --> 00:09:59,943
Oh... Ticket.
77
00:10:00,036 --> 00:10:01,177
100 euro.
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00:10:01,302 --> 00:10:03,021
You bloody cheat!
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00:10:03,146 --> 00:10:05,711
You fraud, liar! Capitalist!
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00:10:05,813 --> 00:10:07,266
Mind your language!
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Mind your language, to hell !
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Security!
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00:10:12,274 --> 00:10:15,122
Go see your "Madhushala", now,
old jack-ass!
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00:10:15,193 --> 00:10:16,826
Security! Security!
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00:10:17,771 --> 00:10:19,252
Let's go, let's go!
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00:10:19,471 --> 00:10:20,581
I'll fix you!
87
00:10:20,659 --> 00:10:22,560
- Go go go.
- Get that cursing girl!
88
00:10:22,661 --> 00:10:25,263
If I catch that old jack-ass...
89
00:10:38,974 --> 00:10:42,097
Old people, nowadays!
What a generation!
90
00:10:42,415 --> 00:10:45,176
Just let it go.
Let bygones be bygones.
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00:10:45,427 --> 00:10:46,802
How can I let it go?
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00:10:46,888 --> 00:10:49,538
He's enjoying poetry and here I am...
93
00:10:49,605 --> 00:10:50,788
Forget it.
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00:10:51,832 --> 00:10:55,068
"Our memories sting
but for a moment."
95
00:10:55,363 --> 00:10:58,521
"As the vast, beckoning
futures awaits."
96
00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:01,252
I can write a bit, too.
97
00:11:01,567 --> 00:11:03,917
Really? Very good. Continue.
98
00:11:04,486 --> 00:11:06,308
No, I couldn't.
99
00:11:07,197 --> 00:11:08,880
If you hear the rest of it
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00:11:08,936 --> 00:11:10,818
you'll end up proposing to me.
101
00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:12,896
Are you crazy?
102
00:11:12,972 --> 00:11:14,188
No really!
103
00:11:14,344 --> 00:11:16,474
Your favorite poet
Harivansh Rai Bacchan
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00:11:16,591 --> 00:11:19,427
met a woman one morning,
recited a poem to her
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00:11:19,528 --> 00:11:21,950
and by evening she married him.
106
00:11:22,039 --> 00:11:23,466
- Really?
- Oh, yeah!
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00:11:23,658 --> 00:11:26,357
And now, he has fathered a legend...
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00:11:26,616 --> 00:11:28,161
Amitabh Bacchan.
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00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,599
Jaggu.
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00:11:31,987 --> 00:11:33,060
Jaggu?
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00:11:33,582 --> 00:11:34,661
My name.
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00:11:34,971 --> 00:11:37,029
Short, for the odd name
my parents gave me.
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00:11:37,101 --> 00:11:38,237
Jagat Jannani.
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00:11:38,377 --> 00:11:41,017
I got teased at school,
so I shortened it.
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00:11:41,137 --> 00:11:42,255
Jaggu.
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00:11:42,966 --> 00:11:44,834
-You from Mumbai?
- No, Delhi!
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00:11:44,895 --> 00:11:47,622
I'm here doing a TV
Production Course. You?
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00:11:47,944 --> 00:11:49,278
I'm Sarfaraz.
119
00:11:49,357 --> 00:11:52,585
I'm studying architecture,
and doing a part-time job,
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00:11:52,713 --> 00:11:54,349
here, at the Pakistani Embassy.
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00:11:54,569 --> 00:11:56,708
The Pakistani Embassy. Why?
122
00:11:56,835 --> 00:11:58,965
Because I'm from Pakistan.
123
00:11:59,263 --> 00:12:02,581
The Indian Embassy
wouldn't hire me, right?
124
00:12:05,236 --> 00:12:06,596
What's the matter?
125
00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:08,525
No, nothing.
126
00:12:12,313 --> 00:12:16,138
Because I'm Pakistani,
you lost your smile?
127
00:12:19,843 --> 00:12:21,135
Well then...
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00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,229
Khuda hafiz.
(good bye - urdu)
129
00:12:33,256 --> 00:12:37,124
♪ Hm, hmm hmm...
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00:12:39,163 --> 00:12:45,313
♪ Without asking my
name and address
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00:12:46,212 --> 00:12:50,860
♪ keeping tradition aside,
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00:12:52,798 --> 00:12:58,604
♪ A few steps, just a few steps,
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00:12:59,074 --> 00:13:04,112
♪ Come walk with me.
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00:13:14,374 --> 00:13:18,343
♪ Without asking my name and address
135
00:13:18,436 --> 00:13:21,835
♪ keeping tradition aside,
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00:13:22,330 --> 00:13:26,328
♪ A few steps, just a few steps,
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00:13:26,541 --> 00:13:29,864
♪ Come walk with me.
138
00:13:30,322 --> 00:13:34,333
♪ Without saying or asking anything
139
00:13:34,575 --> 00:13:37,919
♪ Holding my hand in yours
140
00:13:38,453 --> 00:13:42,272
♪ A few steps, just a few steps
141
00:13:42,531 --> 00:13:45,469
♪ Come walk with me.
142
00:13:45,916 --> 00:13:50,265
♪ Without saying or asking anything
143
00:13:50,533 --> 00:13:54,183
♪ Holding my hand in yours
144
00:13:54,533 --> 00:13:58,099
♪ A few steps, just a few steps
145
00:13:58,509 --> 00:14:02,003
♪ Come walk with me.
146
00:14:22,375 --> 00:14:26,203
♪ If the harsh sunlight
troubles your eyes
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00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:29,749
♪ I'll make shade, for you.
148
00:14:30,234 --> 00:14:34,311
♪ If dark skies frighten you,
I'll cross the horizon
149
00:14:34,505 --> 00:14:38,185
♪ and adorn the sky with
the moon, for you
150
00:14:38,401 --> 00:14:42,253
♪ If sadness surrounds you
I'll be your jester
151
00:14:42,505 --> 00:14:45,860
♪ and make you laugh again.
152
00:14:46,479 --> 00:14:50,297
♪ Laughing and humming like this
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00:14:50,532 --> 00:14:54,321
♪ we'll take these few steps.
154
00:15:12,306 --> 00:15:16,210
♪ Now that I’ve found
a companion like you
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00:15:16,296 --> 00:15:20,073
♪ why should I fear the world?
156
00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:24,078
♪ Not just a few steps,
but my whole life
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00:15:24,337 --> 00:15:27,656
♪ I’ll walk together with you
158
00:15:28,289 --> 00:15:31,892
♪ Without saying or asking anything
159
00:15:32,242 --> 00:15:35,750
♪ Holding my hand in yours
160
00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:40,090
♪ Only a few steps, just a few steps
161
00:15:40,369 --> 00:15:43,945
♪ Come walk with me.
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00:16:25,704 --> 00:16:27,067
Thank you
163
00:16:28,820 --> 00:16:29,942
Mummy!
164
00:16:30,093 --> 00:16:32,755
Papa! She's fallen in love!
165
00:16:33,083 --> 00:16:35,235
Fallen in love?
166
00:16:35,779 --> 00:16:37,079
He's so cute!
167
00:16:37,321 --> 00:16:38,769
Show us more pictures.
168
00:16:38,876 --> 00:16:40,067
What does he do?
169
00:16:40,088 --> 00:16:42,183
I hope he's not from a joint* family.
(extended)
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00:16:42,266 --> 00:16:44,332
Calm down, I'll tell you everything.
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00:16:44,429 --> 00:16:45,821
First, his name.
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00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:48,308
Sarfaraz.
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00:16:48,813 --> 00:16:50,297
A Muslim?!
174
00:16:51,031 --> 00:16:53,539
Yes papa, he studies architure.
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00:16:53,586 --> 00:16:55,077
His family's in Pakistan.
176
00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:57,356
Pakistan?! Which Pakistan?
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00:16:57,539 --> 00:16:59,139
Ma, there's only one Pakistan.
178
00:16:59,202 --> 00:17:02,346
Will you wear a burka?
Pray namaz (to Mecca)?
179
00:17:02,416 --> 00:17:04,629
- Are you mad?
-Jaggu, don't disconnect!
180
00:17:04,645 --> 00:17:06,535
Quick, get in the car!
181
00:17:06,737 --> 00:17:09,691
What a catastrophe, help us Guru!
182
00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:12,462
I knew where Papa was going.
183
00:17:12,481 --> 00:17:13,975
Ever since I was little, I saw...
184
00:17:14,008 --> 00:17:17,325
Guru Tapasvi's face
more than my parents'.
185
00:17:17,431 --> 00:17:18,431
Bye Mom.
186
00:17:19,533 --> 00:17:20,777
On my school bag
187
00:17:20,852 --> 00:17:22,688
on the bathroom wall
188
00:17:22,784 --> 00:17:25,297
Tapasvi ji was everywhere.
189
00:17:26,829 --> 00:17:28,380
He wouldn't even have
190
00:17:28,489 --> 00:17:31,271
root-canal without
consulting him.
191
00:17:33,049 --> 00:17:36,047
Papa got a God-box from Tapasvi ji
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00:17:36,155 --> 00:17:39,077
with a patron god
for every occasion.
193
00:17:39,296 --> 00:17:41,207
When papa traded shares
194
00:17:41,278 --> 00:17:44,122
he showed the Godess Lakshmi
the computer screen.
195
00:17:44,232 --> 00:17:47,862
On the treadmill he
had a Hanuman Idol.
196
00:17:48,804 --> 00:17:50,638
Internet prayers,
online readings,
197
00:17:50,724 --> 00:17:52,982
courier delivered prasad*
(blessing food)
198
00:17:53,075 --> 00:17:55,306
All, Tapasvi ji's ideas.
199
00:18:08,799 --> 00:18:12,021
Jaggu, touch his feet*.
(receive his blessing)
200
00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:22,541
Why, Jagat Janani?
201
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:25,063
Why are you killing yourself?
202
00:18:25,193 --> 00:18:28,171
Get pen and a paper and write:
203
00:18:28,759 --> 00:18:32,515
Lord, enlighten me.
204
00:18:37,585 --> 00:18:38,703
Yes..
205
00:18:40,580 --> 00:18:41,758
Yes.
206
00:18:42,676 --> 00:18:44,290
As you wish, Lord.
207
00:18:45,801 --> 00:18:48,092
This is your future, Jagat Janani.
208
00:18:48,227 --> 00:18:50,327
That Pakistani boy...
209
00:18:50,585 --> 00:18:52,429
named Sarfaraz...
210
00:18:53,380 --> 00:18:54,918
will deceive you.
211
00:18:55,070 --> 00:18:56,869
Sarfaraz will not.
212
00:18:58,711 --> 00:19:00,505
Look at history.
213
00:19:01,155 --> 00:19:05,364
These people have always
cheated and connived.
214
00:19:05,533 --> 00:19:08,115
He'll use you for a bit of fun,
215
00:19:08,271 --> 00:19:10,216
but never marry you.
216
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:12,398
He'll soon disappear.
217
00:19:12,599 --> 00:19:14,021
Jaggu, come home, now.
218
00:19:14,099 --> 00:19:15,766
If you stay one more night,
219
00:19:15,769 --> 00:19:17,681
you're no longer my daughter.
220
00:19:17,738 --> 00:19:20,618
Mr. Sahni, Sir, let me speak to her
221
00:19:20,865 --> 00:19:22,115
Child...
222
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:24,479
press the delete button,
223
00:19:24,779 --> 00:19:27,486
and get him out of your system.
224
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:33,716
Hello.
225
00:19:35,989 --> 00:19:37,247
What's up?
226
00:19:39,001 --> 00:19:40,313
Do you love me?
227
00:19:41,372 --> 00:19:42,869
Of course I do. Why?
228
00:19:43,759 --> 00:19:45,049
Will you marry me?
229
00:19:45,586 --> 00:19:48,127
-Hello? What happened?
- Yes or no, Sarfaraz.
230
00:19:48,242 --> 00:19:50,179
-Yes but when ?
- Tomorrow.
231
00:19:50,336 --> 00:19:51,736
Tomorrow?
232
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:54,013
Tomorrow we'll get married.
233
00:19:55,176 --> 00:19:57,433
Tapasvi ji's prediction is wrong.
234
00:19:57,887 --> 00:19:59,295
I'll prove it.
235
00:20:05,419 --> 00:20:06,900
Congratulations.
236
00:20:11,872 --> 00:20:15,067
Mr James Herrick and
Miss Oprah Brown, you're next.
237
00:20:15,216 --> 00:20:16,638
James isn't here yet.
238
00:20:16,708 --> 00:20:18,372
Oh, talk to the Registrar.
239
00:20:19,394 --> 00:20:22,504
Could you just hold this please.
- Of Course.
240
00:20:26,974 --> 00:20:28,461
This is for you.
241
00:20:28,903 --> 00:20:30,519
For me?
- Yeah.
242
00:20:30,742 --> 00:20:32,050
Thank you.
243
00:20:37,013 --> 00:20:38,736
It was a letter from Sarfaraz.
244
00:20:38,829 --> 00:20:42,130
He wrote, marriage isn't just
between two people, but two families.
245
00:20:42,333 --> 00:20:45,651
Our countries, peoples,
religions, are all different.
246
00:20:45,739 --> 00:20:48,504
How can we be happy
by making our families sad?
247
00:20:48,584 --> 00:20:50,733
Don't try to contact me.
248
00:20:50,992 --> 00:20:52,273
Sorry.
249
00:21:13,096 --> 00:21:14,826
Where to go, young lady?
250
00:21:15,473 --> 00:21:16,778
New Delhi.
251
00:21:20,575 --> 00:21:22,206
I returned to my city,
252
00:21:22,646 --> 00:21:24,715
but papa wouldn't let me stay
in the house.
253
00:21:24,816 --> 00:21:26,823
I joined a news channel.
254
00:21:27,005 --> 00:21:29,325
The boss found a depressed dog...
255
00:21:29,403 --> 00:21:30,988
to generate some Breaking News.
256
00:21:31,111 --> 00:21:32,877
Sometimes we'd find news,
257
00:21:32,949 --> 00:21:34,961
sometimes we invented news.
258
00:21:57,018 --> 00:21:58,500
"Missing"
259
00:21:59,233 --> 00:22:01,890
"If found contact PK."
260
00:22:05,654 --> 00:22:06,786
I found a story.
261
00:22:06,896 --> 00:22:08,693
Go to the office, be there soon.
262
00:22:08,768 --> 00:22:09,888
Hurry.
263
00:22:23,712 --> 00:22:24,804
Excuse me.
264
00:22:24,953 --> 00:22:27,138
Why are you distributing
these pamphlets?
265
00:22:27,304 --> 00:22:29,642
I have a case pending with God.
266
00:22:29,733 --> 00:22:32,338
He won't resolve it, and
I can't contact Him.
267
00:22:32,342 --> 00:22:34,062
My life is hell.
268
00:22:35,433 --> 00:22:38,008
Don't know where He's disappeared to.
269
00:22:39,415 --> 00:22:41,391
Any idea where He is?
270
00:22:42,721 --> 00:22:44,047
No.
271
00:22:46,959 --> 00:22:49,387
♪ [Religious chant]
272
00:23:00,634 --> 00:23:02,994
Why are you wearing a helmet?
273
00:23:03,146 --> 00:23:04,783
To stand out.
274
00:23:05,377 --> 00:23:06,633
Yellow color...
275
00:23:06,723 --> 00:23:08,481
can be seen a long way off,
276
00:23:08,547 --> 00:23:10,177
even in heavy traffic.
277
00:23:10,255 --> 00:23:12,571
I learned this from taxis.
- So?
278
00:23:12,673 --> 00:23:15,108
So God can see me.
279
00:23:15,771 --> 00:23:18,906
How else can He spot me
in this crowd?
280
00:23:19,023 --> 00:23:20,094
Huh?
281
00:23:27,962 --> 00:23:28,892
Go left...
282
00:23:29,385 --> 00:23:30,775
Yeah, perfect, perfect.
283
00:23:30,985 --> 00:23:31,985
Background ..
284
00:23:32,637 --> 00:23:33,637
Cue, Jaggu...
285
00:23:34,892 --> 00:23:37,433
They say animals don't commit suicide.
286
00:23:38,129 --> 00:23:39,398
This is Nikku...
287
00:23:39,529 --> 00:23:42,686
Dr. Sweetie Singh's dog,
from Delhi, Ramesh Nagar.
288
00:23:42,809 --> 00:23:46,135
Last month, it made three
suicide attempts.
289
00:23:46,330 --> 00:23:49,658
It tried jumping off the roof,
eating sleeping tablets,
290
00:23:49,708 --> 00:23:52,049
and jumping onto a gas burner.
291
00:23:52,862 --> 00:23:54,357
Why did Nikku do this?
292
00:23:54,645 --> 00:23:57,638
Is Nikku suffering from
a mental disorder?
293
00:23:58,445 --> 00:23:59,973
Is Nikku ?...
294
00:24:02,807 --> 00:24:04,057
What is it, Jaggu?
295
00:24:04,139 --> 00:24:06,457
What is this shit, here, Mittu?
296
00:24:09,956 --> 00:24:13,539
We'll talk more with famous
industrialist, Ratan Atarival...
297
00:24:13,636 --> 00:24:15,179
after a short break.
298
00:24:16,804 --> 00:24:18,781
Went well, Ratan. Coffee?
299
00:24:18,890 --> 00:24:20,992
Hey! Someone get the man a coffee.
300
00:24:21,068 --> 00:24:22,989
- Jerry?
- Oh no!
301
00:24:23,116 --> 00:24:26,637
What do you think it has?
Depression? Anxiety disorder?
302
00:24:26,764 --> 00:24:30,364
Schizophrenia or attention
deficit, hyperactivity disorder?
303
00:24:30,489 --> 00:24:32,216
Whatever! Why would I care?
304
00:24:32,333 --> 00:24:33,497
Exactly!
305
00:24:33,613 --> 00:24:35,360
Why would anyone care?
306
00:24:35,577 --> 00:24:38,742
So why are we showing
such stupid content?
307
00:24:39,161 --> 00:24:40,934
What do you want to show?
308
00:24:41,138 --> 00:24:43,493
Here, hold this, a sec.
309
00:24:45,050 --> 00:24:46,173
See this,
310
00:24:46,407 --> 00:24:49,760
I met a man today,
who distributes these pamphlets
311
00:24:49,846 --> 00:24:51,247
searching for God.
312
00:24:51,319 --> 00:24:52,651
He found Him?
313
00:24:53,221 --> 00:24:54,888
No, but..
314
00:24:55,051 --> 00:24:57,293
Seaching for God - that's religion,
315
00:24:57,395 --> 00:24:59,372
FINDING God - that's news!
316
00:24:59,427 --> 00:25:01,841
When he finds God I'll put him on air.
317
00:25:01,872 --> 00:25:04,200
- But
-You know the company policy.
318
00:25:04,301 --> 00:25:07,094
No news on religion and
no news on God. Finished!
319
00:25:07,298 --> 00:25:08,926
What's wrong with you?
320
00:25:08,969 --> 00:25:11,325
Where's the old fighter, Jerry?
321
00:25:11,484 --> 00:25:13,093
You want to see the fighter?
322
00:25:13,426 --> 00:25:14,583
Look...
323
00:25:14,670 --> 00:25:15,951
here...
324
00:25:16,505 --> 00:25:19,138
Wanna see the three marks, here?
325
00:25:19,341 --> 00:25:21,029
They're not birthmarks!
326
00:25:21,114 --> 00:25:23,636
Courtesy of your father's friend Tapasvi.
327
00:25:23,684 --> 00:25:25,605
I did an unfavorable news item and
328
00:25:25,691 --> 00:25:27,966
one of his devotees
stuck a trishul* (trident)
329
00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:29,830
here, right in my bum.
330
00:25:32,115 --> 00:25:34,747
So I decided, if I want to stay
in this country,
331
00:25:34,833 --> 00:25:36,904
I can't mess with religion.
That's it!
332
00:25:36,965 --> 00:25:39,465
I've got a show to run, now. Bye bye!
333
00:25:41,442 --> 00:25:42,848
Welcome back from the break,
334
00:25:42,958 --> 00:25:45,576
we're talking with
industrialist Ratan...
335
00:25:46,161 --> 00:25:48,769
The boss didn't let me
follow up that story.
336
00:25:49,285 --> 00:25:51,026
But two weeks later,
337
00:25:51,104 --> 00:25:53,175
the story resurfaced.
338
00:26:41,575 --> 00:26:43,692
Thief! Thief! Thief!
339
00:26:43,838 --> 00:26:45,065
Catch him,
340
00:26:45,115 --> 00:26:48,702
he stole from the donation box.
341
00:26:58,234 --> 00:27:00,421
Where d'you think you're going?
342
00:27:05,607 --> 00:27:07,023
Hold him.
343
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:11,144
Out of the way.
344
00:27:14,373 --> 00:27:17,498
How dare you
pick the Lord's pocket, fool?
345
00:27:17,872 --> 00:27:19,787
Pundit ji, he is not a thief.
346
00:27:19,939 --> 00:27:23,357
I was putting in my donation
and my purse fell in.
347
00:27:23,591 --> 00:27:25,810
He was helping me get it out.
348
00:27:26,348 --> 00:27:29,153
It's true. Check it yourself.
349
00:27:29,385 --> 00:27:31,408
My purse has around 5,000 rupees.
350
00:27:31,511 --> 00:27:32,560
Check it out.
351
00:27:48,536 --> 00:27:50,133
Pundit ji, that's mine.
352
00:27:50,587 --> 00:27:52,719
Once you offer, that's it.
353
00:27:52,797 --> 00:27:54,469
- But...
- it's God's!
354
00:27:54,794 --> 00:27:56,461
Move along. Let them leave.
355
00:27:57,369 --> 00:27:58,369
Hey
356
00:27:58,499 --> 00:27:59,883
What were you doing?
357
00:27:59,984 --> 00:28:01,484
Getting my refund.
358
00:28:01,578 --> 00:28:04,219
He accepted payment but
didn't perform the work.
359
00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:05,457
Hang on...
360
00:28:05,695 --> 00:28:09,566
You took 500, then put back 300?
361
00:28:09,690 --> 00:28:12,347
I had only offered Him 200,
362
00:28:12,465 --> 00:28:13,933
to do the work.
363
00:28:15,169 --> 00:28:17,755
Before, you wore lots of
amulets and talismans...
364
00:28:17,823 --> 00:28:20,286
Rejected !
I was a fool. No more.
365
00:28:20,433 --> 00:28:22,799
What about God stickers
on your face?
366
00:28:23,349 --> 00:28:24,638
Self-defense.
367
00:28:25,943 --> 00:28:28,107
People put God's image on their wall
368
00:28:28,193 --> 00:28:29,702
so nobody pees on it.
369
00:28:29,759 --> 00:28:32,339
I put it here, so nobody hits me.
370
00:28:38,589 --> 00:28:40,295
Mittu. where are you?
371
00:28:40,405 --> 00:28:42,424
Can you pick me up?
372
00:28:42,693 --> 00:28:44,640
I have no money to get home.
373
00:28:44,755 --> 00:28:47,934
I'm at the big temple, in Mudrika.
374
00:28:48,612 --> 00:28:50,466
Come quickly. Thanks, bye.
375
00:28:52,227 --> 00:28:54,620
Here, take this.
- What for?
376
00:28:54,724 --> 00:28:56,506
A taxi ride home.
377
00:28:57,659 --> 00:29:00,146
When people can't get home...
378
00:29:00,863 --> 00:29:02,073
I feel bad
379
00:29:03,817 --> 00:29:04,761
Listen...
380
00:29:04,827 --> 00:29:07,293
No more. That was it.
381
00:29:07,409 --> 00:29:09,155
No no. I can't take this.
382
00:29:10,056 --> 00:29:10,927
Why?
383
00:29:10,959 --> 00:29:14,074
You need this to get yourself home.
384
00:29:18,540 --> 00:29:21,869
Money is no use to get ME home.
385
00:29:22,253 --> 00:29:24,166
Why, where do you live?
386
00:29:32,834 --> 00:29:34,162
Usually,
387
00:29:34,781 --> 00:29:37,632
I stay in Agrasen's Baoli.
(stepwell)
388
00:29:37,855 --> 00:29:40,294
But it's raining hard lately,
389
00:29:40,889 --> 00:29:43,200
so, I'll check into the lock-up.
390
00:29:43,394 --> 00:29:46,108
Lock-up... as in 'Police Lock-up'?
391
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:50,166
Yeah in Delhi there are 122.
I do them in rotation.
392
00:29:50,258 --> 00:29:52,982
And they let you check in
like a hotel?
393
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:55,919
Come, I'll explain.
394
00:30:00,091 --> 00:30:02,473
[ Urinating is prohibited ]
395
00:30:05,550 --> 00:30:06,948
Stay here.
396
00:30:11,144 --> 00:30:13,612
Hey thulley (cop), Look!
397
00:30:29,190 --> 00:30:30,769
I'll fix you.
398
00:30:41,674 --> 00:30:42,737
Jaggu.
399
00:30:45,839 --> 00:30:48,426
You sit behind me,
we must follow that car.
400
00:30:48,482 --> 00:30:51,163
- Who's in the car?
- Our story!
401
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:07,806
Get your purse. I need money.
402
00:31:09,219 --> 00:31:10,632
Hurry, Mittu!
403
00:31:10,741 --> 00:31:11,994
Thanks, bye.
404
00:31:23,988 --> 00:31:25,176
Excuse me.
405
00:31:26,356 --> 00:31:27,348
Yes?
406
00:31:27,404 --> 00:31:29,801
I want to go in the lock-up.
407
00:31:30,207 --> 00:31:31,419
Why?
408
00:31:32,291 --> 00:31:34,116
To meet that guy.
409
00:31:35,890 --> 00:31:36,927
Lady, does this look like
410
00:31:36,940 --> 00:31:38,727
a college canteen to you?
411
00:31:38,812 --> 00:31:40,208
Where you can eat, drink...
412
00:31:40,212 --> 00:31:42,578
and have fun with friends,
as you please?
413
00:31:42,588 --> 00:31:44,392
This is a lock-up.
414
00:31:44,503 --> 00:31:48,707
Only people who do crimes
can go in. Understand?
415
00:31:50,044 --> 00:31:52,461
Madam, bribery is a crime.
416
00:31:52,927 --> 00:31:55,810
Yes, a crime.
That's why I'm offering it.
417
00:31:55,934 --> 00:31:57,375
I could lock you up for this.
418
00:31:57,439 --> 00:31:59,286
Do it. Please!
419
00:32:06,593 --> 00:32:09,324
Thank you, Pandit ji.
- Just one hour.
420
00:32:09,766 --> 00:32:10,864
Hi.
421
00:32:12,318 --> 00:32:14,630
I want to know your story.
422
00:32:14,945 --> 00:32:16,512
Will you tell me?
423
00:32:17,629 --> 00:32:18,651
Why?
424
00:32:18,745 --> 00:32:21,483
I'm a TV reporter.
It's what I do.
425
00:32:34,611 --> 00:32:35,664
Ask me...
426
00:32:36,232 --> 00:32:37,830
whatever you want.
427
00:32:37,904 --> 00:32:38,888
Awesome!
428
00:32:44,184 --> 00:32:46,598
So, what's your name?
429
00:32:47,237 --> 00:32:48,801
I don't have a name.
430
00:32:49,271 --> 00:32:51,862
But everyone calls me PK, PK,
all the time.
431
00:32:51,976 --> 00:32:53,390
What do you do?
432
00:32:56,824 --> 00:32:58,346
Ash-toro-naut.
433
00:33:00,728 --> 00:33:02,017
Astronaut?...
434
00:33:02,446 --> 00:33:05,069
Like people who go to the moon?
435
00:33:05,164 --> 00:33:06,609
I was there once.
436
00:33:06,683 --> 00:33:08,396
Very dull place.
437
00:33:09,998 --> 00:33:13,887
Accha! Ok, so what's your
favorite planet?
438
00:33:14,141 --> 00:33:15,247
My own.
439
00:33:15,332 --> 00:33:17,411
Sure, but apart from Earth?
440
00:33:17,471 --> 00:33:19,403
Earth is so messed up!
441
00:33:19,724 --> 00:33:21,618
I mean my own planet.
442
00:33:25,665 --> 00:33:28,043
At night it's visible.
443
00:33:28,106 --> 00:33:29,983
Up there is my home.
444
00:33:30,418 --> 00:33:32,309
What a huge to-do!...
445
00:33:32,956 --> 00:33:34,565
...the day we found out
446
00:33:34,644 --> 00:33:37,588
there's another planet,
where people like us live!
447
00:33:38,453 --> 00:33:40,889
They sent me here, to do research.
448
00:33:41,302 --> 00:33:42,942
But, as soon as I got here,
449
00:33:43,428 --> 00:33:45,481
someone swiped my remote control.
450
00:33:46,122 --> 00:33:49,331
Without it I can't signal my home.
451
00:33:50,126 --> 00:33:51,366
If I don't signal,
452
00:33:51,405 --> 00:33:53,436
nobody'll come take me back.
453
00:33:53,827 --> 00:33:55,552
I'm in a dangerous spot.
454
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,011
I may be here till I die.
455
00:34:03,420 --> 00:34:05,928
Hello... Listen.
- What?
456
00:34:06,051 --> 00:34:07,878
Open up please. I wanna go home.
457
00:34:07,900 --> 00:34:10,987
Oh, Madam, we out here,
determine who gets out,
458
00:34:10,990 --> 00:34:12,150
not you, in there.
459
00:34:12,232 --> 00:34:13,568
But, I'm not a thief.
460
00:34:13,637 --> 00:34:15,597
Hm, that's what they all say.
461
00:34:15,630 --> 00:34:17,547
Where is Pandit ji?
Please, call him.
462
00:34:17,646 --> 00:34:19,758
Pandit ji's doing his rounds.
463
00:34:20,135 --> 00:34:21,375
Pandit ji!
464
00:34:22,841 --> 00:34:26,360
- Pandit ji!
Hey girl, shut up or else...
465
00:34:46,287 --> 00:34:49,031
You think I'm spouting nonsense?
466
00:34:49,595 --> 00:34:50,954
What else?
467
00:34:51,469 --> 00:34:54,238
Your planet's official
language is Bhojpuri ?!
468
00:34:54,335 --> 00:34:56,200
Our planet doesn't even..
469
00:34:56,552 --> 00:34:58,808
Our planet has no language.
470
00:34:59,474 --> 00:35:02,302
We talk with our minds.
No confusion.
471
00:35:02,411 --> 00:35:03,715
Here they say one thing,
472
00:35:03,771 --> 00:35:05,315
and mean something else.
473
00:35:05,369 --> 00:35:07,235
One statement has four meanings.
474
00:35:08,189 --> 00:35:10,812
Shake your head and say:
accha, accha
475
00:35:10,976 --> 00:35:12,937
It means 'very good'.
476
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:17,772
Pop out your eyes and say:
'accha', it expresses shock.
477
00:35:17,876 --> 00:35:20,931
"Your mother had an accident.
Accha"?... Shock.
478
00:35:21,673 --> 00:35:24,115
A loud angry 'accha' means
479
00:35:24,405 --> 00:35:28,022
You 'REALLY' think you
can teach ME a lesson?!
480
00:35:28,357 --> 00:35:29,800
When one is thinking,
481
00:35:29,807 --> 00:35:31,611
there's the long 'accha'.
482
00:35:32,038 --> 00:35:34,340
Acchaaa!
483
00:35:35,339 --> 00:35:38,420
With words you need to learn
the feelings behind them,
484
00:35:38,619 --> 00:35:40,496
to make any sense at all.
485
00:35:40,623 --> 00:35:43,250
So damn confusing!
Took me a full 6 hours...
486
00:35:43,259 --> 00:35:44,986
to learn Bhojpuri.
487
00:35:45,279 --> 00:35:46,585
It took you 6 hours,
488
00:35:46,589 --> 00:35:48,285
to learn the whole Bhojpuri language?!
489
00:35:48,293 --> 00:35:50,685
Nobody would let me
hold their hand!
490
00:35:51,294 --> 00:35:54,638
But then I found a
co-operative lady.
491
00:35:54,932 --> 00:35:56,026
I held her hands
492
00:35:56,032 --> 00:35:57,566
and transferred
her whole language to me.
493
00:35:57,645 --> 00:35:59,739
You just can't stop lying!
494
00:36:00,192 --> 00:36:02,348
There are limits
even to tall tales.
495
00:36:02,481 --> 00:36:04,940
Are your hands USB cables
496
00:36:05,284 --> 00:36:08,340
that transfer files
between computers?
497
00:36:09,214 --> 00:36:10,746
And what about your clothes?
498
00:36:10,910 --> 00:36:13,083
Do they also wear faded
jeans on your planet?
499
00:36:13,133 --> 00:36:14,303
No, no, no!
500
00:36:14,951 --> 00:36:16,170
On our planet...
501
00:36:16,394 --> 00:36:19,363
On our planet nobody
wears clothes.
502
00:36:20,782 --> 00:36:23,806
When I first landed
here I thought that...
503
00:36:24,804 --> 00:36:27,555
your people had
different skins from ours.
504
00:36:28,227 --> 00:36:33,028
Some with shiny skin, some black.
505
00:36:34,372 --> 00:36:37,200
Some with colorful skin,
and some just plain white.
506
00:36:38,322 --> 00:36:42,318
Some skins cling to the body,
some are saggy and loose.
507
00:36:44,345 --> 00:36:46,749
Then one day I saw a car.
508
00:36:47,500 --> 00:36:49,324
A dancing car.
509
00:36:54,976 --> 00:36:56,321
Then I understood,
510
00:36:56,407 --> 00:37:00,120
that people's bodies here are
the same as on my world.
511
00:37:00,779 --> 00:37:03,747
They just put something
called "fashion"
512
00:37:03,857 --> 00:37:05,716
all over their bodies.
513
00:37:13,756 --> 00:37:17,032
Now I could blend in with
people from your planet.
514
00:37:17,389 --> 00:37:20,821
But strangely, everyone
was laughing at me.
515
00:37:26,366 --> 00:37:28,176
It took a while to
understand that
516
00:37:28,263 --> 00:37:31,614
men's fashions are
different from ladies'.
517
00:37:32,020 --> 00:37:35,155
Morning fashion was different
from night fashion.
518
00:37:35,537 --> 00:37:39,504
Sports-playing fashion was different
from toast-serving fashion.
519
00:37:41,562 --> 00:37:45,558
With some clothes
I also found a picture.
520
00:37:57,808 --> 00:37:59,618
It gradually dawned on me
521
00:37:59,681 --> 00:38:03,658
that this picture is very important
for survival on this world.
522
00:38:04,128 --> 00:38:07,011
I could exchange
this picture for food.
523
00:38:07,110 --> 00:38:10,656
So I started collecting pictures
of this famous old man.
524
00:38:26,202 --> 00:38:27,314
What?
525
00:38:32,103 --> 00:38:34,484
Why are you giving me this?
526
00:38:36,503 --> 00:38:39,360
Why do you bring junk
to my shop?
527
00:38:42,435 --> 00:38:44,841
Ah, I'll take that!
528
00:38:45,138 --> 00:38:47,037
There you go, carrots.
529
00:38:47,713 --> 00:38:52,146
It seemed this picture was
only useful on one kind of paper.
530
00:38:52,752 --> 00:38:56,591
On other papers,
its has zero utility.
531
00:38:58,911 --> 00:39:02,655
Now I could get both money and
clothes from the dancing car.
532
00:39:02,733 --> 00:39:05,743
It became my bank,
and my tailor.
533
00:39:07,269 --> 00:39:09,947
Once I found such
wonderful attire,
534
00:39:10,070 --> 00:39:13,296
that I didn't even need the
paper with the picture.
535
00:39:13,353 --> 00:39:15,497
Food came running to me,
on its own.
536
00:39:15,568 --> 00:39:17,182
Sir, take this.
537
00:39:19,564 --> 00:39:21,843
Now in order to find
my remote control
538
00:39:21,913 --> 00:39:23,816
I needed to learn
this planet's language.
539
00:39:23,875 --> 00:39:26,931
Without language nothing
was possible here.
540
00:39:27,406 --> 00:39:29,737
Like, communicating
to this gentleman
541
00:39:29,779 --> 00:39:32,516
that he may have a
wardrobe malfunction.
542
00:39:39,561 --> 00:39:43,155
Perhaps I'd spoiled the
look he was going for.
543
00:39:44,529 --> 00:39:46,911
So, I re-corrected.
544
00:40:18,367 --> 00:40:20,410
I found him on the road.
545
00:40:20,512 --> 00:40:22,493
Probably a hit-and-run.
546
00:40:23,226 --> 00:40:25,310
Seems alert enough...
547
00:40:26,622 --> 00:40:28,723
but he's not responding.
548
00:40:29,497 --> 00:40:31,590
Perhaps he's deaf?
549
00:40:32,184 --> 00:40:33,829
Are you deaf!
550
00:40:34,630 --> 00:40:37,402
He hears but won't answer.
551
00:40:38,721 --> 00:40:40,940
The shock from the blow, induced...
552
00:40:41,153 --> 00:40:42,675
memory loss.
553
00:40:43,019 --> 00:40:44,636
Memory's gone.
554
00:40:54,724 --> 00:40:57,816
Do you remember who hit you?
555
00:41:00,321 --> 00:41:03,327
Remember?... Car's number?
556
00:41:03,664 --> 00:41:05,659
Anything at all?
557
00:41:35,235 --> 00:41:36,962
Let's go, brother.
558
00:41:37,628 --> 00:41:39,252
Come with me.
559
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:44,205
You're my guest until
your memory comes back.
560
00:41:45,968 --> 00:41:48,138
Keep banging your head into things.
561
00:41:48,363 --> 00:41:51,316
If a blow to the head can
take away your memory,
562
00:41:51,387 --> 00:41:53,861
another blow can also return it.
563
00:41:53,972 --> 00:41:55,502
I've seen it in films.
564
00:41:55,544 --> 00:41:57,322
I didn't understand a word.
565
00:41:57,384 --> 00:41:59,755
I needed to hold his hands
566
00:41:59,758 --> 00:42:02,401
and do a language transfer.
567
00:42:04,594 --> 00:42:06,052
Woah!
568
00:42:08,122 --> 00:42:11,419
Have you forgotten the
difference between male and female?
569
00:42:11,565 --> 00:42:12,801
Hold on a sec.
570
00:42:13,466 --> 00:42:15,253
Look at my driver's license.
571
00:42:15,345 --> 00:42:18,175
Sex - male, man,
572
00:42:18,284 --> 00:42:20,730
mister, a guy, dude...
573
00:42:22,478 --> 00:42:24,526
If I ever wanted
to get back home,
574
00:42:24,603 --> 00:42:27,341
I just had to hold
someone's hand,now.
575
00:42:43,854 --> 00:42:47,358
♪ O Brothers, a colorful
guest has come
576
00:42:50,788 --> 00:42:54,551
♪ Who doesn't differentiate
between boy and girl.
577
00:42:57,419 --> 00:43:01,330
♪ O brothers, a colorful guest has come
578
00:43:01,448 --> 00:43:04,524
♪ Who doesn't differentiate
between boy and girl
579
00:43:04,711 --> 00:43:08,348
♪ You'll get me in trouble
You'll get me beaten up
580
00:43:08,541 --> 00:43:14,031
♪ Don't do this, don't
do this don't, don't...
581
00:43:14,132 --> 00:43:18,687
♪ The lewd boy has
come here, as my guest
582
00:43:20,679 --> 00:43:27,234
♪ The colorful boy has
come here, as our guest
583
00:44:05,077 --> 00:44:08,973
♪ In your multi-colored garb,
which village are you from?
584
00:44:09,128 --> 00:44:12,829
♪ Have you come from Patna
or from Paatan or from Patiala?
585
00:44:13,024 --> 00:44:16,087
♪ In your multi-colored garb,
which village are you from?
586
00:44:16,173 --> 00:44:19,067
♪ Have you come from Patna
or from Paatan or from Patiala?
587
00:44:19,231 --> 00:44:23,395
♪ You must have a name, o brother,
588
00:44:23,699 --> 00:44:26,511
♪ With which you
registered at school.
589
00:44:26,645 --> 00:44:30,089
♪ You must have a name, o brother,
590
00:44:30,401 --> 00:44:33,542
♪ With which you
registered at school.
591
00:44:33,862 --> 00:44:36,944
♪ You must have some address,
some ration card
592
00:44:37,117 --> 00:44:41,087
♪ Did you fall from a crack in the sky,
or sprout from a hole in the ground?
593
00:44:41,141 --> 00:44:42,959
♪ You'll get us killed,
594
00:44:42,962 --> 00:44:45,279
♪ You'll get me beaten up
595
00:44:45,529 --> 00:44:48,343
♪ Don't do this
Don't do this. Don't do this
596
00:44:48,544 --> 00:44:52,674
♪ The lewd boy has
come here, as my guest
597
00:44:57,146 --> 00:45:02,831
♪ The lewd boy has
come here, as my guest
598
00:45:05,755 --> 00:45:10,239
♪ Losing your memory is a blessing
in disguise -- no fights, no quarrels
599
00:45:12,432 --> 00:45:15,955
♪ Losing your memory is a blessing
in disguise -- no fights, no quarrels
600
00:45:16,182 --> 00:45:19,861
♪ No dealing with anybody,
nor any loans to pay
601
00:45:20,018 --> 00:45:23,479
♪ You look lovable, O pervert,
You look innocent, O pervert.
602
00:45:23,729 --> 00:45:26,961
♪ Don't do this, don't do this
don't do this
603
00:45:27,118 --> 00:45:33,817
♪ This lewd boy has
come, as our guest.
604
00:45:36,063 --> 00:45:42,046
♪ This lewd boy has
come, as my guest.
605
00:45:44,966 --> 00:45:48,589
♪ My colorful guest has arrived
606
00:45:48,735 --> 00:45:52,159
♪ The boy who'll jump on anyone
607
00:45:52,282 --> 00:45:55,646
♪ My colorful guest has arrived
608
00:45:55,818 --> 00:45:59,226
♪ The boy who'll jump on anyone
609
00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:16,125
♪ This lewd boy has
come, as my guest.
610
00:46:16,371 --> 00:46:19,561
♪ This lewd boy has
come, as my guest.
611
00:46:19,600 --> 00:46:25,992
♪ This lewd boy has
come, as my guest.
612
00:46:36,177 --> 00:46:38,495
I can understand your pain,
613
00:46:38,878 --> 00:46:41,503
but you can't hold
hands in public, here.
614
00:46:41,744 --> 00:46:43,580
I know you're tempted,
615
00:46:43,629 --> 00:46:46,198
but it can be
life threatening.
616
00:46:49,887 --> 00:46:51,706
Don't be sad, brother.
617
00:46:51,815 --> 00:46:54,019
Come, I know what to do.
618
00:47:05,566 --> 00:47:09,255
Here, you can hold hands,
feet, whatever...
619
00:47:09,288 --> 00:47:11,753
nobody's going to beat you up.
620
00:47:12,597 --> 00:47:14,191
This place was a paradise,
621
00:47:14,282 --> 00:47:17,373
everyone was very
beautiful and friendly.
622
00:47:17,738 --> 00:47:21,383
They all took my hand
to welcome me into their home.
623
00:47:21,406 --> 00:47:26,014
Then I met a gentle lady named
Phuljhariya. (firecracker)
624
00:47:26,055 --> 00:47:30,140
Hey, Phuljhariya, take him
to the honeymoon suite.
625
00:48:18,674 --> 00:48:20,875
Phuljhariya patiently sat
626
00:48:21,032 --> 00:48:23,258
while, for 6 hours,
627
00:48:23,661 --> 00:48:26,259
I transferred her
language to me.
628
00:48:26,637 --> 00:48:29,218
From 1 2 3, to XYZ
629
00:48:29,342 --> 00:48:31,858
I transferred all she had.
630
00:48:42,578 --> 00:48:44,200
Your first time?
631
00:48:45,479 --> 00:48:48,435
Burnt out before
you even started, eh?
632
00:48:52,951 --> 00:48:54,142
Yes.
633
00:48:56,208 --> 00:48:58,336
Where are you from?
634
00:49:01,494 --> 00:49:04,436
I came from far away, miss.
635
00:49:04,965 --> 00:49:08,002
You may not have
heard of the place.
636
00:49:08,268 --> 00:49:10,705
But you talk just
like me, though.
637
00:49:11,201 --> 00:49:12,845
I speak like you
638
00:49:13,197 --> 00:49:15,934
because I learned it
from you, sister.
639
00:49:16,055 --> 00:49:19,308
Hey! Your sister,
is your mother!
640
00:49:19,362 --> 00:49:20,544
Get lost!
641
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:25,321
Brother!
642
00:49:25,462 --> 00:49:28,091
Wake up brother!
643
00:49:29,210 --> 00:49:30,398
Brother!
644
00:49:31,609 --> 00:49:33,654
You can talk now, brother!
645
00:49:33,803 --> 00:49:35,442
I need your help brother.
646
00:49:35,535 --> 00:49:38,215
What magic did Phuljhariya
work on you?
647
00:49:38,301 --> 00:49:39,723
Come with me quick!
648
00:49:39,824 --> 00:49:43,238
Memory must have a
direct connection to sex.
649
00:49:43,409 --> 00:49:44,782
We must tell the doctor,
650
00:49:44,852 --> 00:49:47,866
we found the most delightful
cure for amnesia.
651
00:49:48,061 --> 00:49:51,332
It's very important, brother.
Let's go, hurry!
652
00:49:59,049 --> 00:50:00,873
Stop.. stop!
653
00:50:05,599 --> 00:50:09,263
Brother, a guy snatched
my chain right here.
654
00:50:10,054 --> 00:50:12,926
I need that chain, brother.
655
00:50:13,172 --> 00:50:15,511
- Is it valuable?
- Very valuable.
656
00:50:15,568 --> 00:50:18,503
That thief may be from
our village.
657
00:50:18,576 --> 00:50:21,113
But he must have sold it
in Delhi.
658
00:50:21,115 --> 00:50:24,827
Here in Mandawa he'd get caught
with something so valuable.
659
00:50:26,144 --> 00:50:28,125
Then, I must go, brother.
660
00:50:28,426 --> 00:50:29,552
Where?
661
00:50:30,636 --> 00:50:31,867
Delhi.
662
00:50:55,962 --> 00:50:57,528
- Sir
- What?
663
00:50:57,825 --> 00:50:59,767
My remote control's been stolen.
664
00:50:59,824 --> 00:51:01,588
Are you peekay? (drunk)
665
00:51:01,650 --> 00:51:04,455
Police have nothing better to
do than finding TV remotes?
666
00:51:04,673 --> 00:51:06,081
It wasn't a 'TV' remote.
667
00:51:06,167 --> 00:51:07,725
What, then?
668
00:51:08,467 --> 00:51:11,870
I can't tell you, but it was
on a chain around my neck,
669
00:51:11,956 --> 00:51:13,312
and it's priceless.
670
00:51:13,566 --> 00:51:14,887
Where it was stolen?
671
00:51:14,972 --> 00:51:16,797
In Mandawa. (Rajasthan)
672
00:51:17,231 --> 00:51:19,111
It was stolen in Mandawa, idiot!
673
00:51:19,186 --> 00:51:21,129
And you look for it in Delhi?!
674
00:51:21,723 --> 00:51:23,627
But the thief came to Delhi.
675
00:51:23,713 --> 00:51:25,760
- So?
So where can I find him?
676
00:51:25,825 --> 00:51:28,685
Idiot! The population
is 1.5 crore (15 million).
677
00:51:28,809 --> 00:51:32,132
The Police are only human,
not Gods.
678
00:51:32,309 --> 00:51:33,332
(...not Gods)
679
00:51:35,443 --> 00:51:38,151
Only God can help you.
680
00:51:40,068 --> 00:51:43,740
Praise the Lord.
Only He can help you.
681
00:51:45,855 --> 00:51:48,899
God knows where to find it!
682
00:51:50,403 --> 00:51:53,063
God only knows! Now get lost!
683
00:51:55,007 --> 00:51:58,610
Have faith in God, son.
684
00:51:58,742 --> 00:52:01,575
Who is this God,
who can help me?
685
00:52:01,638 --> 00:52:03,865
Everyone I ask
mentions His name.
686
00:52:04,801 --> 00:52:07,916
The more I heard, the
more confused I got.
687
00:52:08,627 --> 00:52:12,291
People here seem
to know who made them.
688
00:52:12,439 --> 00:52:14,614
They build places for Him to live.
689
00:52:14,752 --> 00:52:16,783
A house of God on every street.
690
00:52:16,889 --> 00:52:19,664
Millions of people go to Him
with their problems,
691
00:52:19,830 --> 00:52:23,322
and He takes away all their
troubles, for a small fee.
692
00:52:23,734 --> 00:52:27,333
We don't have such
wonders on our world.
693
00:52:27,707 --> 00:52:29,378
I couldn't believe it at first.
694
00:52:29,443 --> 00:52:31,870
Then I thought, I must try.
695
00:52:34,577 --> 00:52:36,604
One God for me please, brother.
696
00:52:36,621 --> 00:52:40,597
Which one? This is 20, 50.
That is 100, 500, rupees.
697
00:52:40,715 --> 00:52:44,008
What is the difference
between the 20 and 500?
698
00:52:44,338 --> 00:52:46,869
Only the size, the rest is the same.
699
00:52:46,965 --> 00:52:50,149
The 20 rupee one works
just fine as well, right?
700
00:52:50,974 --> 00:52:54,098
Here, give me 15.
Just take it and go.
701
00:53:07,497 --> 00:53:11,432
God I'm starving.
Give me something to eat.
702
00:53:23,346 --> 00:53:25,596
I went totally out-of-control!
703
00:53:25,677 --> 00:53:27,750
This God seemed to be working.
704
00:53:27,851 --> 00:53:29,841
Now, I could go back home!
705
00:53:29,914 --> 00:53:32,818
God my remote control got stolen.
706
00:53:33,163 --> 00:53:36,265
Please get it back for me
I want to go home.
707
00:53:49,276 --> 00:53:52,111
Sir, has this God's battery
run down?
708
00:53:52,126 --> 00:53:54,302
It worked for a while
then it stopped.
709
00:53:54,396 --> 00:53:55,486
What do you mean?
710
00:53:55,565 --> 00:53:57,646
I mean, put in a new battery.
711
00:53:57,779 --> 00:53:59,693
Hey it doesn't run on batteries.
712
00:53:59,763 --> 00:54:02,755
Why doesn't it work,
is it a manufacturing defect?
713
00:54:02,828 --> 00:54:04,654
I don't make defective pieces.
714
00:54:06,114 --> 00:54:07,543
You made this God?
715
00:54:07,938 --> 00:54:10,310
Yes, with my own hands.
716
00:54:11,463 --> 00:54:14,241
You made God or did God make you?
717
00:54:14,489 --> 00:54:17,130
Brother, God made us all !
718
00:54:17,371 --> 00:54:19,775
We just make sculptures of Him.
719
00:54:20,072 --> 00:54:22,016
Why do you make His sculpture?
720
00:54:22,096 --> 00:54:23,726
So we can pray to Him.
721
00:54:23,835 --> 00:54:26,040
To tell Him about
our joys and sorrows.
722
00:54:26,122 --> 00:54:28,358
Did you install a transmitter?
723
00:54:28,578 --> 00:54:30,894
How do the messages reach Him?
724
00:54:31,291 --> 00:54:34,061
God doesn't need a transmitter.
725
00:54:34,490 --> 00:54:36,160
He hears us, directly.
726
00:54:36,250 --> 00:54:37,797
If He hears us directly,
727
00:54:37,844 --> 00:54:39,522
what use are these sculptures?
728
00:54:39,599 --> 00:54:42,125
Oh man, how can I explain
this to him?
729
00:54:42,659 --> 00:54:45,791
Are you trying to drive me
out of business?
730
00:54:45,817 --> 00:54:47,565
What is your problem?
731
00:54:47,615 --> 00:54:49,685
My remote control got stolen.
732
00:54:49,700 --> 00:54:53,254
I told God, but He won't say
where it is.
733
00:54:53,255 --> 00:54:55,108
Are you PK? (drunk)
734
00:54:55,110 --> 00:54:56,588
What do you mean?
735
00:54:56,591 --> 00:54:58,841
You're overloading
this little God!
736
00:54:58,932 --> 00:55:01,544
How can He chase a thief
with such little legs?
737
00:55:01,630 --> 00:55:03,271
Go in the temple
738
00:55:03,365 --> 00:55:06,310
they have a bigger God,
who can run faster.
739
00:55:06,380 --> 00:55:08,869
Give Him this coconut
and some money.
740
00:55:08,875 --> 00:55:10,675
He'll get the job done.
741
00:55:10,789 --> 00:55:12,840
Huh? That'll be 200 rupees.
742
00:55:18,472 --> 00:55:21,128
Everyone waited with
coconuts and money in hand
743
00:55:21,206 --> 00:55:23,113
for their own special task.
744
00:55:23,198 --> 00:55:26,129
Two hours later, it was my turn.
745
00:55:26,321 --> 00:55:28,097
God, oh God.
746
00:55:29,288 --> 00:55:31,917
God, get my remote control back.
747
00:55:34,787 --> 00:55:37,010
- Where is it?
- Come on, move.
748
00:55:37,075 --> 00:55:39,185
Wait, I didn't get
my thing, yet.
749
00:55:39,239 --> 00:55:41,419
He's not doing His job.
750
00:55:41,528 --> 00:55:44,997
-And I paid Him already.
-Your job will be done.
751
00:55:45,047 --> 00:55:47,060
- When?
- Who knows when?
752
00:55:47,122 --> 00:55:48,130
Soon.
753
00:55:48,184 --> 00:55:49,232
Move along.
754
00:55:49,301 --> 00:55:53,083
-But when will I get my thing?
-Don't block the line! Move along.
755
00:55:53,145 --> 00:55:55,604
What if I move on and
someone else get my thing?
756
00:55:55,653 --> 00:55:56,755
Are you PK? (drunk)
757
00:55:56,824 --> 00:55:58,857
Wait, madam. What are you doing?
758
00:55:58,919 --> 00:56:02,365
-Where do I get my thing?
-Look in mental hospital.
759
00:56:02,458 --> 00:56:04,255
How's that? I paid cash here
760
00:56:04,325 --> 00:56:06,558
but delivery is in
mental hospital?
761
00:56:06,628 --> 00:56:09,501
- Get him out of here.
-At least give me a receipt.
762
00:56:09,629 --> 00:56:10,786
Give me a receipt.
763
00:56:10,857 --> 00:56:14,044
What'll I show for proof of
purchase at the mental hospital?
764
00:56:14,114 --> 00:56:16,833
- Get out, go.
- But, my remote?
765
00:56:16,998 --> 00:56:18,334
Out, out.
766
00:56:26,019 --> 00:56:29,075
Brother, I can't find my sandals.
767
00:56:29,218 --> 00:56:31,074
Someone must've taken them.
768
00:56:31,146 --> 00:56:32,632
Take someone else's.
769
00:56:32,828 --> 00:56:35,302
In temples such
rotation is common.
770
00:56:49,746 --> 00:56:53,278
I paid in full but
didn't get my job done.
771
00:56:57,534 --> 00:56:58,892
What's his name?
772
00:56:59,017 --> 00:57:01,331
- Bhagwan (Lord)
- Full name.
773
00:57:01,442 --> 00:57:03,283
I don't know the full name.
774
00:57:04,586 --> 00:57:05,975
Where does he live?
775
00:57:06,473 --> 00:57:08,354
In the temple, nearby.
776
00:57:08,778 --> 00:57:10,762
You put the money in his hands?
777
00:57:10,884 --> 00:57:12,455
No. I put in his box.
778
00:57:12,540 --> 00:57:14,279
Did he say he would
finish your job?
779
00:57:14,365 --> 00:57:15,928
That's the problem.
He doesn't talk.
780
00:57:16,028 --> 00:57:17,098
Why, is he mute?
781
00:57:17,233 --> 00:57:18,865
He might be.
782
00:57:19,307 --> 00:57:20,388
Really?
783
00:57:22,543 --> 00:57:24,210
Describe his appearance.
784
00:57:27,410 --> 00:57:29,156
He looks exactly like this.
785
00:57:31,175 --> 00:57:32,961
In a larger size.
786
00:57:34,625 --> 00:57:36,598
Come here. Come.
787
00:57:37,869 --> 00:57:39,695
Are you PK? (drunk)
788
00:57:40,065 --> 00:57:42,770
Yeah... how does everyone know?
789
00:57:42,879 --> 00:57:44,629
You think we're jack-asses?
790
00:57:44,872 --> 00:57:47,255
I've been a policeman for 20 years.
791
00:57:47,289 --> 00:57:50,300
I can tell who's drunk or sober,
like that.
792
00:57:50,708 --> 00:57:53,092
Kripal Singh. Search him.
793
00:57:55,209 --> 00:57:57,312
What's he got? Give it to me.
794
00:57:59,124 --> 00:58:00,631
Dr. D'Mello.
795
00:58:01,597 --> 00:58:03,872
Doctor, why do you get so drunk
796
00:58:03,958 --> 00:58:06,398
that you forget your own
religion?
797
00:58:06,629 --> 00:58:09,256
Instead of a church you went
to a temple!
798
00:58:09,313 --> 00:58:10,846
You wanna start a riot?
799
00:58:11,113 --> 00:58:13,388
Go to your own church,
800
00:58:13,637 --> 00:58:15,401
to your own God.
801
00:58:17,534 --> 00:58:18,661
Church?
802
00:58:19,213 --> 00:58:21,818
♪ ♪ ♪
803
00:58:27,599 --> 00:58:31,294
♪ O for a thousand tongues to sing
804
00:58:31,474 --> 00:58:34,973
♪ my great Redeemer's praise,
805
00:58:35,271 --> 00:58:39,073
♪ the glories of my God and King,
806
00:58:39,131 --> 00:58:42,584
♪ the triumphs of his grace!
807
00:58:42,906 --> 00:58:46,739
♪ My gracious Master and my God,
808
00:58:47,021 --> 00:58:50,411
♪ assist me to proclaim...
809
00:59:07,675 --> 00:59:09,607
Get him out.
- But, but...
810
00:59:10,161 --> 00:59:12,497
- Get out.
- But my remote?
811
00:59:12,622 --> 00:59:16,152
God died on the cross
for your sins, and you...
812
00:59:16,247 --> 00:59:20,263
DIED?! On a cross? When?
813
00:59:20,610 --> 00:59:24,146
2000 years ago. For your sins.
814
00:59:24,522 --> 00:59:27,896
What did I do?
I just got here.
815
00:59:29,298 --> 00:59:31,442
Are you PK? (drunk)
- ...Ahah...
816
00:59:31,505 --> 00:59:34,850
God is watching you.
He's looking at your behaviour.
817
00:59:34,948 --> 00:59:37,650
Where? Where is He?
818
00:59:38,923 --> 00:59:40,997
What's in that cup?
- Wine.
819
00:59:41,980 --> 00:59:45,907
Wine!... Now I understood
820
00:59:46,581 --> 00:59:49,206
God got bored of coconut water.
821
00:59:49,618 --> 00:59:51,512
Now He enjoys wine, instead.
822
00:59:51,661 --> 00:59:53,223
I had to give Him wine.
823
00:59:53,621 --> 00:59:56,434
So I started collecting money.
824
00:59:56,880 --> 00:59:59,464
Some money, from the dancing car.
825
00:59:59,532 --> 01:00:00,490
And some
826
01:00:00,609 --> 01:00:02,443
from a gentleman with a bowl
827
01:00:02,552 --> 01:00:05,175
who always stands on the bridge.
828
01:00:05,253 --> 01:00:08,286
He lets people take
whatever they want.
829
01:00:28,721 --> 01:00:30,897
Brother, is there a
House of God nearby?
830
01:00:30,976 --> 01:00:32,466
Yes, straight ahead.
831
01:00:53,215 --> 01:00:54,497
Hold it.
832
01:00:54,886 --> 01:00:56,116
What's in there?
833
01:00:56,248 --> 01:00:58,323
Wine! For God.
834
01:00:58,583 --> 01:01:00,042
Where is He?
835
01:01:40,514 --> 01:01:43,058
One Madam seemed very sad.
836
01:01:43,116 --> 01:01:45,964
To find out her problem,
I needed to hold her hands.
837
01:01:46,216 --> 01:01:48,708
Jerk! Trying to hit on a widow?!
838
01:01:48,904 --> 01:01:51,216
Huh? How do you
know she's a widow?
839
01:01:51,302 --> 01:01:53,873
Can't you see she's
wearing white?!
840
01:02:05,225 --> 01:02:07,185
Is everything fine?
841
01:02:09,489 --> 01:02:11,536
Just relax. Smile.
842
01:02:12,802 --> 01:02:15,206
I'm so sorry your husband died.
843
01:02:15,339 --> 01:02:16,850
What?! When?
844
01:02:17,116 --> 01:02:20,303
How should I know, 'when'?
You're wearing white!
845
01:02:20,491 --> 01:02:22,202
White is for weddings.
846
01:02:22,305 --> 01:02:24,741
No white is for mourning.
847
01:02:25,163 --> 01:02:29,246
Black is for mourning, stupid.
Get lost! Go!
848
01:02:39,779 --> 01:02:42,587
You all lost your husband
at the same time?
849
01:02:42,699 --> 01:02:45,496
Hey I'm still alive.
You want one of these?
850
01:02:46,420 --> 01:02:48,696
After several beatings,
I understood.
851
01:02:48,699 --> 01:02:51,044
On this planet, there
isn't just one God,
852
01:02:51,099 --> 01:02:52,154
but many.
853
01:02:52,329 --> 01:02:54,763
Each God has different rules.
854
01:02:55,068 --> 01:02:57,763
Each God opened His own company.
855
01:02:57,941 --> 01:03:00,247
People here call them religions.
856
01:03:00,387 --> 01:03:03,136
Each religion has a
different manager.
857
01:03:03,738 --> 01:03:05,613
Everyone on this world
858
01:03:05,692 --> 01:03:08,853
is affiliated with one
religion, or 'company'.
859
01:03:09,207 --> 01:03:12,411
Each following only
one company God
860
01:03:12,474 --> 01:03:13,859
and no other.
861
01:03:14,294 --> 01:03:16,420
Which company, am I a member of?
862
01:03:16,525 --> 01:03:18,364
Which God should I pray to?
863
01:03:18,622 --> 01:03:22,525
Knowing this was essential
to finding my remote.
864
01:03:37,976 --> 01:03:39,282
What are you doing?
865
01:03:39,390 --> 01:03:40,765
Where is the hallmark seal?
866
01:03:41,611 --> 01:03:43,093
Which hallmark seal?
867
01:03:43,560 --> 01:03:44,950
The religious stamp?
868
01:03:46,095 --> 01:03:49,119
How can one tell, which
Company God this child belongs to?
869
01:03:49,340 --> 01:03:51,766
Where does God put his stamp?
870
01:03:52,641 --> 01:03:53,839
Security!
871
01:04:00,806 --> 01:04:04,104
Finding my religion
was a tough problem.
872
01:04:04,175 --> 01:04:06,011
But there was a way around it.
873
01:04:06,310 --> 01:04:08,529
I would pray to all Gods
874
01:04:09,153 --> 01:04:11,528
One of them must be my God...
875
01:04:11,757 --> 01:04:13,310
who would hear my plea.
876
01:04:13,507 --> 01:04:18,662
♪ I've heard that
You run the whole world,
877
01:04:19,796 --> 01:04:25,557
♪ Listen to my prayer too,
my home calls me
878
01:04:25,986 --> 01:04:28,065
♪ O Lord
879
01:04:28,266 --> 01:04:31,544
♪ Where are you?
880
01:04:33,091 --> 01:04:37,872
♪ Khuda*, where are you?
(Allah)
881
01:04:39,976 --> 01:04:45,666
♪ I've heard you show
the path to lost hearts
882
01:04:46,467 --> 01:04:49,677
♪ I am lost too
883
01:04:49,986 --> 01:04:52,575
♪ My home calls me back
884
01:04:52,833 --> 01:04:57,883
♪ O Lord, where are you?
885
01:04:59,978 --> 01:05:04,628
♪ Khuda*, where are you?
(Allah)
886
01:05:33,411 --> 01:05:36,664
♪ Should I worship you
(Puja-Hindu),
887
01:05:36,852 --> 01:05:39,706
♪ or should I offer you namaaz
(Muslim)
888
01:05:40,013 --> 01:05:44,989
♪ Should I offer an ardaas
(Sikh)
889
01:05:46,552 --> 01:05:49,861
♪ You are neither found in the temple
890
01:05:50,367 --> 01:05:53,152
♪ nor in the Church,
891
01:05:53,709 --> 01:05:58,957
♪ My tired eyes look for you.
892
01:06:00,503 --> 01:06:05,010
♪ My tired eyes look for you.
893
01:06:06,882 --> 01:06:10,648
♪ My tired eyes look for you.
894
01:06:17,210 --> 01:06:23,282
♪ I observe all the
rites correctly.
895
01:06:24,161 --> 01:06:29,986
♪ I bow my head
as millions do.
896
01:06:30,305 --> 01:06:34,963
♪ O Lord, where are you?
897
01:06:37,620 --> 01:06:42,135
♪ Khuda*, where are you?
(Allah)
898
01:07:10,516 --> 01:07:13,738
♪ You have many names
899
01:07:14,085 --> 01:07:16,981
♪ You have many faces
900
01:07:17,553 --> 01:07:22,640
♪ There are many paths to find you
901
01:07:24,147 --> 01:07:26,972
♪ I walked all those paths,
902
01:07:27,726 --> 01:07:30,337
♪ but couldn't find you.
903
01:07:30,980 --> 01:07:36,122
♪ I can't understand what you want.
904
01:07:37,844 --> 01:07:42,891
♪ I can't understand what you want.
905
01:07:44,248 --> 01:07:49,606
♪ I can't understand what you want..
906
01:07:54,649 --> 01:08:00,774
♪ I perform rites, without
thinking or understanding
907
01:08:01,591 --> 01:08:07,344
♪ I follow your commands, obediently
908
01:08:07,797 --> 01:08:09,305
♪ O Lord ..
909
01:08:09,995 --> 01:08:13,916
♪ Where are you?
910
01:08:14,765 --> 01:08:19,876
♪ Khuda*, where are you?
(Allah)
911
01:08:21,106 --> 01:08:27,196
♪ O Lord, where are you?
912
01:08:27,977 --> 01:08:33,889
♪ Khuda*, where are you?
(Allah)
913
01:08:43,490 --> 01:08:45,615
I'm very confused, my Lord.
914
01:08:48,393 --> 01:08:52,323
I must be doing something wrong,
that you can't hear me.
915
01:08:54,705 --> 01:08:56,455
Hear my troubles.
916
01:08:57,635 --> 01:08:59,533
Show me the way.
917
01:09:00,192 --> 01:09:01,501
Please
918
01:09:04,607 --> 01:09:07,038
Should I hold my hands like this?
919
01:09:07,372 --> 01:09:09,802
Should I kneel at your feet
920
01:09:09,980 --> 01:09:12,154
and touch my head to the floor?
921
01:09:14,701 --> 01:09:16,735
Should I ring a bell
922
01:09:17,184 --> 01:09:19,801
or use a loudspeaker
to wake you up?
923
01:09:20,208 --> 01:09:21,818
Should I read the Gita,
924
01:09:21,888 --> 01:09:23,107
Koran
925
01:09:23,239 --> 01:09:24,619
or Bible?
926
01:09:26,240 --> 01:09:29,692
All your managers
say something different.
927
01:09:30,734 --> 01:09:33,203
Some say to fast on Monday,
928
01:09:33,365 --> 01:09:35,234
some on Tuesday.
929
01:09:35,773 --> 01:09:38,094
Some say eat before sunrise,
930
01:09:38,179 --> 01:09:40,562
some after sunset.
931
01:09:41,406 --> 01:09:43,461
Some say, worship cows,
932
01:09:43,767 --> 01:09:45,629
others say, sacrfice cows.
933
01:09:45,900 --> 01:09:48,227
Some say, bare feet
in the temple,
934
01:09:48,302 --> 01:09:50,525
some say, wear boots in church.
935
01:09:52,056 --> 01:09:54,419
Who's right? Who's wrong?
936
01:09:55,132 --> 01:09:57,325
I don't understand any of this.
937
01:09:59,179 --> 01:10:01,343
It's frustrating, God.
938
01:10:04,257 --> 01:10:06,053
I just want to go home.
939
01:10:06,982 --> 01:10:08,966
I'll do whatever you want.
940
01:10:09,302 --> 01:10:11,013
Just take me home,
941
01:10:11,466 --> 01:10:12,654
please.
942
01:10:14,771 --> 01:10:16,552
Say something.
943
01:10:17,621 --> 01:10:19,658
Wherever you are,
944
01:10:20,418 --> 01:10:21,910
answer me,
945
01:10:22,817 --> 01:10:24,100
please.
946
01:10:26,371 --> 01:10:27,543
Please.
947
01:10:29,487 --> 01:10:30,779
Please.
948
01:10:41,087 --> 01:10:43,779
[MISSING]
949
01:11:38,726 --> 01:11:40,870
Hey, why'd you lock the door?
950
01:11:40,883 --> 01:11:43,059
I won't let you go this time!
951
01:11:43,153 --> 01:11:44,990
My big entrance is next.
952
01:11:45,036 --> 01:11:47,052
"Shiva, destroyer of evil"
953
01:11:47,255 --> 01:11:48,966
"afraid of nothing..."
954
01:11:49,083 --> 01:11:50,607
Security!
955
01:11:51,015 --> 01:11:53,917
- Who are you?
- Don't recognize me, huh?
956
01:11:54,225 --> 01:11:56,626
I'm PK. PK.
(I'm drunk)
957
01:11:57,911 --> 01:12:00,075
Security!... Anybody?
958
01:12:00,079 --> 01:12:02,424
Some drunk locked the toilet!
959
01:12:02,445 --> 01:12:04,533
I can't do my act from here.
960
01:12:05,603 --> 01:12:07,899
Open the door... now!
961
01:12:08,001 --> 01:12:09,654
First, my remote.
962
01:12:09,782 --> 01:12:11,311
What remote?
963
01:12:11,375 --> 01:12:13,052
My spaceship's remote.
964
01:12:13,633 --> 01:12:14,786
Spaceship?
965
01:12:15,085 --> 01:12:16,192
You forgot?!
966
01:12:16,273 --> 01:12:18,387
I told you so many times.
967
01:12:18,500 --> 01:12:21,637
I'm not from this planet,
I come from far away.
968
01:12:21,715 --> 01:12:22,950
Put this away!
969
01:12:23,028 --> 01:12:25,677
Just get my remote,
so I can go home.
970
01:12:25,871 --> 01:12:27,059
Understand?
971
01:12:27,180 --> 01:12:30,333
Brother let me go,
I have small children.
972
01:12:30,475 --> 01:12:31,646
I know...
973
01:12:31,792 --> 01:12:34,155
Ganesh and Kartik.
They're all grown up,
974
01:12:34,223 --> 01:12:35,741
they're OK on their own.
975
01:12:35,815 --> 01:12:37,181
Get my remote...
976
01:12:37,240 --> 01:12:39,216
then go see your family.
977
01:12:39,453 --> 01:12:40,971
Lord, save me.
978
01:12:41,072 --> 01:12:42,908
There's a Lord above you?!
979
01:12:42,999 --> 01:12:44,466
Om namah Shivaya
(adoration to Shiva)
980
01:12:44,521 --> 01:12:45,756
Where?
981
01:12:47,846 --> 01:12:51,578
Now presenting the dance
of Shiva, the fearless.
982
01:12:51,786 --> 01:12:53,296
Save me!
983
01:12:56,516 --> 01:12:57,696
Save me !
984
01:13:04,305 --> 01:13:07,327
Somebody help!
985
01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:29,381
Ohmm...
986
01:13:48,036 --> 01:13:50,942
Bole, bole, bole...
987
01:13:52,743 --> 01:13:55,805
I was in the snow-capped
Himalayas,
988
01:13:56,009 --> 01:13:58,306
in deep meditation.
989
01:13:58,742 --> 01:14:00,973
Suddenly... a light.
990
01:14:02,183 --> 01:14:04,120
A great infinte light...
991
01:14:05,096 --> 01:14:10,320
emanating from a small
object on the ground.
992
01:14:11,191 --> 01:14:12,669
I looked at it.
993
01:14:13,214 --> 01:14:15,277
I closed my eyes in meditation.
994
01:14:15,778 --> 01:14:18,590
Suddenly I felt a
connection to God.
995
01:14:19,028 --> 01:14:21,660
God enlighten me...
996
01:14:21,965 --> 01:14:24,269
What is this marvellous object...
997
01:14:24,332 --> 01:14:27,841
which even in the snows
of winter gives me warmth?
998
01:14:28,291 --> 01:14:30,303
And God said... my son,
999
01:14:30,436 --> 01:14:34,807
it's a jewel from Lord Shiva's
broken pellet drum.
1000
01:14:34,834 --> 01:14:36,213
Take it.
1001
01:14:36,426 --> 01:14:40,239
Take it and build a shrine
to venerate it.
1002
01:14:40,395 --> 01:14:42,849
for, the mere sight of it
1003
01:14:42,889 --> 01:14:46,768
will dispel the suffering
of all loyal devotees.
1004
01:14:46,775 --> 01:14:48,994
Hail the Great Lord Shiva!
(bole bole...)
1005
01:14:50,527 --> 01:14:53,089
Would you like to see it?
1006
01:14:53,434 --> 01:14:57,536
The jewel from Lord Shiva's
broken drum?
1007
01:15:00,417 --> 01:15:04,551
Bole-bole, bole. Bumm-bumm, bole
(Hail the Great Lord Shiva)
1008
01:15:05,308 --> 01:15:09,442
Bole-bole, bole. Bumm-bumm, bole
1009
01:15:18,029 --> 01:15:20,847
Bumm-bumm, bole!
Bumm-bumm, bole!
1010
01:15:20,924 --> 01:15:23,044
A miracle! A miracle!
1011
01:15:23,255 --> 01:15:25,372
- Stop!
Don't stop him.
1012
01:15:25,458 --> 01:15:28,310
Let him come, he's just excited.
Come.
1013
01:15:28,404 --> 01:15:30,275
Bumm-bumm, bole! Greetings
1014
01:15:30,391 --> 01:15:32,613
Not there, my son, here.
1015
01:15:33,615 --> 01:15:37,662
Say what you want, right here.
Bumm-bumm, bole!
1016
01:15:37,990 --> 01:15:39,739
Bumm-bumm, bole!
1017
01:15:39,888 --> 01:15:41,873
Praise the Lord!
1018
01:15:42,162 --> 01:15:43,622
Lord, where are you?
1019
01:15:43,813 --> 01:15:47,179
Come on stage.
I want to thank you.
1020
01:15:48,179 --> 01:15:49,568
He's here.
1021
01:15:50,185 --> 01:15:51,808
I met Him in the toilet.
1022
01:15:51,910 --> 01:15:54,402
I asked for my lost
property and he ran off.
1023
01:15:54,451 --> 01:15:57,149
I wondered,
why is He running away?
1024
01:15:57,152 --> 01:15:58,244
But no!...
1025
01:15:58,263 --> 01:16:00,822
He was leading me here
to my property.
1026
01:16:00,923 --> 01:16:03,399
Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord!
1027
01:16:04,295 --> 01:16:06,498
This is not a jewel from Shiva's drum.
1028
01:16:06,552 --> 01:16:09,456
It's my property,
delivered to you by mistake.
1029
01:16:09,573 --> 01:16:11,817
And your jewel ended up
somewhere else
1030
01:16:11,878 --> 01:16:13,635
Just ask Him. He's here.
1031
01:16:13,678 --> 01:16:16,646
God, come up front. Tell him.
1032
01:16:18,422 --> 01:16:21,923
OK, I'll just take my property
and go, huh?
1033
01:16:24,193 --> 01:16:26,615
- Stop brother.
- Oh .. its mine.
1034
01:16:29,208 --> 01:16:32,169
Bole bole...
1035
01:16:45,121 --> 01:16:48,658
♪ A traveller of dreams
1036
01:16:50,383 --> 01:16:53,542
♪ Neither a devotee, nor an unbeliever
1037
01:16:55,590 --> 01:16:59,296
♪ O God, please tell me
1038
01:17:00,755 --> 01:17:04,453
♪ Where am I at now?
1039
01:17:05,595 --> 01:17:10,499
♪ Why play hide and seek with me?
1040
01:17:10,867 --> 01:17:14,914
♪ Take me home, O God..
1041
01:17:15,285 --> 01:17:20,055
♪ My heart seeks refuge
1042
01:17:20,506 --> 01:17:25,300
♪ My heart seeks refuge
1043
01:17:32,155 --> 01:17:34,862
How long have you felt...
1044
01:17:35,161 --> 01:17:37,228
that you're from another planet?
1045
01:17:39,965 --> 01:17:41,044
Listen.
1046
01:17:41,262 --> 01:17:43,700
You need a psychiatrist.
1047
01:17:43,904 --> 01:17:45,918
A mental doctor.
1048
01:17:46,806 --> 01:17:47,835
Time to go, Madam.
1049
01:17:47,877 --> 01:17:50,807
That's all the jail time you get
for 500 rupees.
1050
01:17:50,889 --> 01:17:51,700
One minute.
1051
01:17:58,189 --> 01:17:59,389
Here's my card.
1052
01:18:00,925 --> 01:18:02,308
That's my number.
1053
01:18:02,393 --> 01:18:04,956
I can arrange a session
with a psychiatrist.
1054
01:18:05,402 --> 01:18:07,791
Call me anytime. Ok?
1055
01:18:09,203 --> 01:18:10,515
Take care.
1056
01:18:13,011 --> 01:18:14,476
Thank you, Pandit ji.
1057
01:18:16,703 --> 01:18:19,081
You think my story is fake?
1058
01:18:21,890 --> 01:18:24,943
Go, broadcast your suicidal dog story.
1059
01:18:25,086 --> 01:18:26,166
Nikku,...
1060
01:18:26,401 --> 01:18:28,493
...that is your destiny!
1061
01:18:35,878 --> 01:18:39,307
Pandit ji. I want to go back.
2 more minutes.
1062
01:18:40,286 --> 01:18:43,668
What's all this in and out?
1063
01:18:43,908 --> 01:18:45,197
How about this?
1064
01:18:45,340 --> 01:18:48,778
Another 500 rupees,
and you take him with you.
1065
01:18:48,863 --> 01:18:50,910
Nikku, the suicidal dog...
1066
01:18:51,251 --> 01:18:52,853
When did I tell you this?
1067
01:18:52,978 --> 01:18:54,337
You didn't.
1068
01:18:54,841 --> 01:18:56,650
How do you know, then?
1069
01:18:57,186 --> 01:18:59,036
I read your mind
1070
01:18:59,170 --> 01:19:02,066
when you held my hand.
1071
01:19:02,641 --> 01:19:04,382
You thought, my story is bogus.
1072
01:19:04,392 --> 01:19:06,826
It's your fate to do stories
like Nikku's.
1073
01:19:06,832 --> 01:19:08,761
Liar! I must have told you.
1074
01:19:08,917 --> 01:19:11,605
- Don't lie!
Madam, I don't know how.
1075
01:19:11,693 --> 01:19:13,660
To lie, you must twist words.
1076
01:19:13,715 --> 01:19:16,767
On my world, we hold hands
and read the mind directly.
1077
01:19:17,785 --> 01:19:19,212
Gimme your hand.
- No way.
1078
01:19:19,402 --> 01:19:20,276
Hey..
1079
01:19:20,300 --> 01:19:21,200
Help me, son,
1080
01:19:21,203 --> 01:19:23,831
I took my sick wife
to the hospital.
1081
01:19:23,917 --> 01:19:27,795
They want 10,000 rupees to
admit her and I'm short 500.
1082
01:19:27,849 --> 01:19:31,421
Could you let me have
500 rupees, son?
1083
01:19:31,535 --> 01:19:32,716
Here...
1084
01:19:34,208 --> 01:19:35,236
There you go.
1085
01:19:35,303 --> 01:19:38,082
Give me your address,
I'll send you a money order.
1086
01:19:38,138 --> 01:19:41,407
Where I live,
money orders can't go. Keep it.
1087
01:19:41,683 --> 01:19:43,817
Thank you, son.
1088
01:19:44,025 --> 01:19:45,441
Uncle!
1089
01:19:45,796 --> 01:19:48,538
Here's 100 more for the tip.
1090
01:19:51,115 --> 01:19:53,169
God bless you, son.
1091
01:19:54,242 --> 01:19:58,163
Look, that's proof,
you can't read minds.
1092
01:19:58,438 --> 01:20:01,583
Can't you see?
He made a fool out of you.
1093
01:20:01,716 --> 01:20:03,481
There's no hospital nearby.
1094
01:20:03,629 --> 01:20:04,872
I know.
1095
01:20:05,162 --> 01:20:08,122
He's treating his wife
to dinner at a 5 star hotel.
1096
01:20:08,199 --> 01:20:10,121
It's her 75th birthday,
1097
01:20:10,295 --> 01:20:13,090
and she's never been
to 5 star hotel.
1098
01:20:13,285 --> 01:20:16,271
He's been saving a bit
from his pension, each month.
1099
01:20:16,334 --> 01:20:19,678
But she ordered an extra ice cream.
It cost more than he'd planned.
1100
01:20:19,748 --> 01:20:22,880
So, he excused himself to the
bathroom but came here for money.
1101
01:20:22,967 --> 01:20:24,568
What a load of crap!
1102
01:20:25,304 --> 01:20:28,272
Madam, on our planet nobody lies.
1103
01:20:29,512 --> 01:20:31,053
Believe it or not.
1104
01:21:31,690 --> 01:21:33,566
Wait, hold on.
1105
01:21:34,278 --> 01:21:35,730
You give it to him.
1106
01:21:35,938 --> 01:21:39,927
It's your birthday, enjoy!
1107
01:22:10,982 --> 01:22:13,060
[Agrasen's Baoli]
1108
01:22:22,631 --> 01:22:25,115
[Agrasen's Baoli]
(stepwell)
1109
01:22:37,350 --> 01:22:39,991
I told you.
Nobody lies on my planet.
1110
01:22:42,595 --> 01:22:44,341
Did you tell anybody...
1111
01:22:51,517 --> 01:22:54,139
You didn't tell anyone
you're an alien, did you?
1112
01:22:54,172 --> 01:22:55,184
No!
1113
01:22:55,645 --> 01:22:57,919
They'd lock me up in a
laboratory,
1114
01:22:58,013 --> 01:23:00,594
then, do an alien autopsy.
1115
01:23:02,117 --> 01:23:04,688
Then, why did you trust me?
1116
01:23:06,471 --> 01:23:07,801
Since I got here,
1117
01:23:08,248 --> 01:23:10,006
everyone just took my money.
1118
01:23:10,099 --> 01:23:11,372
Not you.
1119
01:23:11,519 --> 01:23:13,396
In fact it cost you 5000 rupees
1120
01:23:13,466 --> 01:23:15,278
for a donation to help me out.
1121
01:23:15,747 --> 01:23:19,513
I felt you were a gentleman
and I could trust you.
1122
01:23:22,584 --> 01:23:25,004
I'll get your remote control, PK
1123
01:23:26,324 --> 01:23:27,686
How?
1124
01:23:28,200 --> 01:23:29,919
How -- I dont know.
1125
01:23:30,001 --> 01:23:32,644
But, I'll make sure you get home.
1126
01:23:32,670 --> 01:23:34,257
That's my promise.
1127
01:24:21,698 --> 01:24:23,495
What are you staring at?
1128
01:24:24,198 --> 01:24:25,403
You.
1129
01:24:26,224 --> 01:24:28,399
Aliens don't visit me, often.
1130
01:24:29,716 --> 01:24:32,801
Say, does everyone on your planet
1131
01:24:33,262 --> 01:24:35,358
have big ears, like you?
1132
01:24:36,421 --> 01:24:37,705
All the same.
1133
01:24:37,745 --> 01:24:40,557
And they all walk around naked?
1134
01:24:41,114 --> 01:24:43,020
Don't you find it strange?
1135
01:24:43,365 --> 01:24:44,849
That crow is naked.
1136
01:24:45,504 --> 01:24:47,137
Do you think it's strange?
1137
01:24:47,467 --> 01:24:50,239
It'd be strange, if it wore a tie.
1138
01:24:52,657 --> 01:24:55,454
PK, I couldn't sleep last night.
1139
01:24:56,372 --> 01:24:57,641
I kept thinking about
1140
01:24:57,684 --> 01:24:59,982
how to get your remote from Tapasvi.
1141
01:25:00,300 --> 01:25:01,300
Hello!
1142
01:25:01,376 --> 01:25:04,331
Hello, connect to
Balbir Singh in room No. 4.
1143
01:25:04,620 --> 01:25:06,222
Wrong number.
1144
01:25:06,345 --> 01:25:07,971
This isn't Fortis Hospital?
1145
01:25:08,213 --> 01:25:11,071
I told you yesterday, you got
a wrong number.
1146
01:25:11,167 --> 01:25:12,940
What do you mean, 'wrong'?
1147
01:25:12,975 --> 01:25:15,566
I saved it in my mobile, personally.
1148
01:25:16,179 --> 01:25:18,783
So what was it, you were thinking?
1149
01:25:22,184 --> 01:25:25,161
Hello, connect to
Balbir Singh, room No. 4
1150
01:25:25,205 --> 01:25:27,661
Oh, you called too late,
1151
01:25:28,075 --> 01:25:30,419
Balbir died this morning.
1152
01:25:30,557 --> 01:25:31,757
What?
1153
01:25:32,335 --> 01:25:35,130
How could someone die
in a hemorrhoid operation?
1154
01:25:35,208 --> 01:25:37,763
That is embarrassing.
But never mind.
1155
01:25:37,896 --> 01:25:40,411
The death certificate will say
"heart attack",
1156
01:25:40,468 --> 01:25:42,596
Your family reputation
won't be spoiled.
1157
01:25:42,669 --> 01:25:44,083
Come by to pick up the body.
1158
01:25:44,146 --> 01:25:46,263
-Yes... umm ah...
- OK, bye.
1159
01:25:49,665 --> 01:25:52,835
- Why did you say that?
- Just spreading happiness.
1160
01:25:52,946 --> 01:25:54,216
When he goes to the hospital
1161
01:25:54,265 --> 01:25:55,655
and sees his friend is alive,
1162
01:25:55,712 --> 01:25:57,161
he'll be pleasantly surprised.
1163
01:25:57,174 --> 01:25:58,210
What?
1164
01:25:58,286 --> 01:26:01,114
I'm fed up with his
wrong numbers,
1165
01:26:01,273 --> 01:26:02,726
so I pranked him.
1166
01:26:02,969 --> 01:26:04,208
Pranked?
1167
01:26:04,349 --> 01:26:06,532
PK, I was just kidding.
1168
01:26:13,210 --> 01:26:14,384
Oh...
1169
01:26:15,285 --> 01:26:16,879
Now I get it!
1170
01:26:16,894 --> 01:26:19,197
I understand everything.
It's a prank!
1171
01:26:19,220 --> 01:26:21,874
When Tapasvi calls God,
1172
01:26:22,015 --> 01:26:25,052
he tilts his head and says,
"God, enlighten me"...
1173
01:26:25,247 --> 01:26:27,896
it gets directed to the wrong number!
1174
01:26:28,318 --> 01:26:31,213
The person at the other end
is pulling a prank.
1175
01:26:31,270 --> 01:26:33,435
Why would God say my remote
1176
01:26:33,521 --> 01:26:35,871
is a jewel from a broken drum?
1177
01:26:36,911 --> 01:26:38,114
It seems..
1178
01:26:38,828 --> 01:26:42,003
the God-to-Earth communications system
1179
01:26:42,072 --> 01:26:43,674
is totally scrambled.
1180
01:26:43,756 --> 01:26:46,386
All managers are getting
wrong numbers.
1181
01:26:46,474 --> 01:26:47,528
Meaning?
1182
01:26:47,600 --> 01:26:52,094
That's why God was giving me
weird solutions to my problems.
1183
01:26:52,659 --> 01:26:54,018
Sometimes He'd say,
1184
01:26:54,097 --> 01:26:57,107
come to me, rolling on the ground
and I'll do your work.
1185
01:26:57,176 --> 01:26:59,474
Tell me, aren't we all
God's children?
1186
01:26:59,615 --> 01:27:01,590
What normal parent tells their kids,
1187
01:27:01,691 --> 01:27:05,245
"roll on the ground and
I'll give you what you want"?
1188
01:27:05,401 --> 01:27:07,011
Did your papa ever say,
1189
01:27:07,089 --> 01:27:10,290
"if you want a new dress,
roll on the ground"?
1190
01:27:10,876 --> 01:27:12,210
Sometimes He says,
1191
01:27:12,304 --> 01:27:14,210
"bathe me in milk every day".
1192
01:27:14,288 --> 01:27:15,436
How bizarre!
1193
01:27:16,018 --> 01:27:17,230
PK...
1194
01:27:17,418 --> 01:27:20,693
if these calls reached
the right number...
1195
01:27:21,070 --> 01:27:22,706
what would He say?
1196
01:27:22,808 --> 01:27:27,205
He'd say, "millions of my children
go to sleep hungry, in the streets,
1197
01:27:27,282 --> 01:27:28,911
give the milk to them".
1198
01:27:28,989 --> 01:27:31,122
"Why drench me in milk?"
1199
01:27:31,361 --> 01:27:33,521
I'm sure someone is pranking,
1200
01:27:33,590 --> 01:27:35,500
like you, just, did.
1201
01:27:35,546 --> 01:27:38,031
PK thought Tapasvi was decent.
1202
01:27:38,176 --> 01:27:40,529
But I said nothing
to clarify his confusion.
1203
01:27:40,608 --> 01:27:43,275
Because an idea came into my head.
1204
01:27:43,426 --> 01:27:46,893
An idea that would get
PK's remote back.
1205
01:27:48,365 --> 01:27:49,909
Who is this PK?
1206
01:27:50,107 --> 01:27:52,297
No idea, who he is
or where he's from.
1207
01:27:52,372 --> 01:27:55,147
But he sees the world
in his own special way.
1208
01:27:55,584 --> 01:27:57,200
- Meaning?
- Meaning...
1209
01:27:57,403 --> 01:27:58,794
If he sees you smoking
1210
01:27:58,973 --> 01:28:01,763
he'll call the police saying
you're committing suicide.
1211
01:28:01,894 --> 01:28:02,806
Why?
1212
01:28:02,809 --> 01:28:05,740
Because the packet says:
"Smoking Kills"
1213
01:28:07,099 --> 01:28:08,734
So, what's your angle?
1214
01:28:10,812 --> 01:28:12,249
A great war.
1215
01:28:12,484 --> 01:28:15,569
We arrange a face-off between
Tapasvi and PK.
1216
01:28:15,791 --> 01:28:18,257
We just broadcast what they say.
1217
01:28:18,661 --> 01:28:20,990
TRP will go sky-high!
(Target Ratings Points)
1218
01:28:21,036 --> 01:28:24,551
Jaggu, I already have 3 scars
on my right bum.
1219
01:28:24,940 --> 01:28:28,449
You want the left bum to balance
is that what you're saying?
1220
01:28:28,457 --> 01:28:29,497
No, Jerry,
1221
01:28:29,521 --> 01:28:31,029
the best thing about this war
1222
01:28:31,115 --> 01:28:33,036
is that PK won't fight with Tapasvi.
1223
01:28:33,100 --> 01:28:38,255
He will calmly explain that
Tapasvi reached the wrong number.
1224
01:28:38,434 --> 01:28:41,059
Tapasvi will have no idea
how to answer him.
1225
01:28:41,903 --> 01:28:43,804
Jerry... Jerry...
1226
01:28:44,326 --> 01:28:46,960
He's sitting out there.
Just meet him once.
1227
01:28:47,131 --> 01:28:49,865
I challenge you, to answer
his questions.
1228
01:28:49,952 --> 01:28:51,403
Trust me, please.
1229
01:29:01,883 --> 01:29:03,901
Brother, this fell from your pocket.
1230
01:29:03,970 --> 01:29:05,144
Oh, thank you.
1231
01:29:09,336 --> 01:29:11,131
It's... not mine.
1232
01:29:12,391 --> 01:29:14,534
Kama Sutra, strawberry flavor.
1233
01:29:16,608 --> 01:29:18,084
I hate strawberry jam.
1234
01:29:18,339 --> 01:29:19,645
Ask them.
1235
01:29:19,739 --> 01:29:20,987
It's not mine!
1236
01:29:21,132 --> 01:29:22,429
Weirdo!
1237
01:29:24,634 --> 01:29:26,580
- Is it yours?
- How dare you?
1238
01:29:26,992 --> 01:29:30,370
- Check your purse if one's missing.
- Who is this dickhead!
1239
01:29:31,973 --> 01:29:34,963
- Uncle is it yours?
- No not mine.
1240
01:29:35,057 --> 01:29:37,011
PK ! It's his.
1241
01:29:37,393 --> 01:29:40,802
You can ask him all about it.
Come.
1242
01:29:43,016 --> 01:29:44,016
Come in.
1243
01:29:46,193 --> 01:29:47,298
What is this?
1244
01:29:48,524 --> 01:29:49,951
It's a condom.
1245
01:29:50,366 --> 01:29:51,682
What's it for?
1246
01:29:51,699 --> 01:29:53,810
For world population control.
1247
01:29:55,674 --> 01:29:56,762
How?
1248
01:29:57,244 --> 01:29:58,636
By wearing it...
1249
01:30:00,115 --> 01:30:01,496
...while having sex.
1250
01:30:04,178 --> 01:30:07,147
How is the world's population
controlled if you wear this?
1251
01:30:07,251 --> 01:30:10,283
Not just me.
Millions of people wear it.
1252
01:30:10,829 --> 01:30:12,734
Do you give these to everyone?
1253
01:30:13,193 --> 01:30:14,448
Everyone has them.
1254
01:30:14,943 --> 01:30:16,200
I have a question.
1255
01:30:16,218 --> 01:30:18,330
Ask, PK. Ask anything!
1256
01:30:18,892 --> 01:30:23,387
When money drops, everyone says
"it's mine, it's mine".
1257
01:30:23,458 --> 01:30:25,529
But when a condom drops,
everyone's afraid
1258
01:30:25,599 --> 01:30:28,792
and runs off, saying
"its not mine". Why is that?
1259
01:30:29,385 --> 01:30:31,781
You see, sex is a private matter.
1260
01:30:32,096 --> 01:30:33,096
Why?
1261
01:30:33,098 --> 01:30:36,138
You don't simply announce to
the world "today I'm having sex".
1262
01:30:37,373 --> 01:30:38,809
But in wedding ceremonies,
1263
01:30:39,560 --> 01:30:42,202
don't the firecrackers,
loudspeakers and orchestras...
1264
01:30:42,231 --> 01:30:45,763
announce to the whole town:
"today I'm having sex"?
1265
01:30:49,341 --> 01:30:50,568
What?
1266
01:30:51,263 --> 01:30:53,215
I don't have a reply to that.
1267
01:30:53,674 --> 01:30:55,872
But, I do have a job for you.
1268
01:30:59,850 --> 01:31:02,607
Let's go, before he changes his mind.
1269
01:31:05,393 --> 01:31:07,821
Watch your ass, Tapasvi,
1270
01:31:07,977 --> 01:31:10,477
my trishul's coming at you!
(trident)
1271
01:31:14,518 --> 01:31:19,230
PK, Tapasvi ji meets his followers
here every day to talk to God.
1272
01:31:19,643 --> 01:31:22,612
We'll go in and listen
to their phone calls.
1273
01:31:22,809 --> 01:31:26,187
When you feel there's a mix-up
with the line, tell him.
1274
01:31:26,239 --> 01:31:29,429
Explain to him that his calls
are going to the wrong number.
1275
01:31:29,540 --> 01:31:31,333
Then he'll return my remote?
1276
01:31:31,354 --> 01:31:32,982
Once he sees it's a prank
1277
01:31:33,043 --> 01:31:34,810
he'll know the story about
1278
01:31:34,919 --> 01:31:37,325
the jewel from Shiva's drum
is false,
1279
01:31:37,411 --> 01:31:39,275
and return your remote control.
1280
01:31:39,566 --> 01:31:41,216
Ok I'll explain it to him.
1281
01:31:42,901 --> 01:31:45,658
To build a house is virtuous.
1282
01:31:45,748 --> 01:31:49,361
To build God's house,
is the greatest virtue.
1283
01:31:50,603 --> 01:31:52,976
Open wide your arms and give,
1284
01:31:53,382 --> 01:31:56,078
to rid yourselves of suffering.
1285
01:31:57,031 --> 01:32:00,277
Tell me, devotee, what troubles you?
1286
01:32:01,666 --> 01:32:06,155
Tapasvi ji, my wife's been
paralysed for 6 months.
1287
01:32:06,508 --> 01:32:08,860
The doctors have done all they can.
1288
01:32:08,897 --> 01:32:10,627
I wish you would...
1289
01:32:11,795 --> 01:32:15,255
God, enlighten me.
1290
01:32:22,503 --> 01:32:23,987
Yes.
1291
01:32:27,221 --> 01:32:28,977
What else, God?
1292
01:32:34,255 --> 01:32:35,791
Where?
1293
01:32:38,734 --> 01:32:40,544
As you wish, God.
1294
01:32:43,868 --> 01:32:46,483
Have you heard of the
Rathong glacier?
1295
01:32:46,555 --> 01:32:47,955
No, sir.
1296
01:32:48,373 --> 01:32:52,961
It's in the Himalayas.
Take the train to Siliguri.
1297
01:32:53,479 --> 01:32:56,752
From there take the bus to Gangtok.
1298
01:32:57,010 --> 01:33:01,570
From there bareoot... for 8 days.
1299
01:33:02,182 --> 01:33:06,857
On Mount Kanchenjunga
is God's divine temple.
1300
01:33:07,639 --> 01:33:09,039
Go there.
1301
01:33:09,606 --> 01:33:11,204
Your wish will be fulfilled.
1302
01:33:11,207 --> 01:33:13,030
Wrong number!
It's a wrong number.
1303
01:33:13,857 --> 01:33:15,761
-What?
-Wrong number.
1304
01:33:15,849 --> 01:33:16,904
Tapasvi ji,
1305
01:33:16,990 --> 01:33:19,029
the technology you're using
1306
01:33:19,125 --> 01:33:21,341
to reach God is faulty.
1307
01:33:21,888 --> 01:33:24,095
All your calls are going
to a wrong number,
1308
01:33:24,347 --> 01:33:28,151
and there, some duplicate God
pulling a prank on you.
1309
01:33:28,278 --> 01:33:31,738
Wh-what are you trying to say?
1310
01:33:31,850 --> 01:33:34,659
I'll explain.
We're all God's children, right?
1311
01:33:35,352 --> 01:33:36,552
Yes, so?
1312
01:33:36,595 --> 01:33:39,372
So if your child comes to you
with a problem,
1313
01:33:39,474 --> 01:33:40,600
what would you do?
1314
01:33:40,682 --> 01:33:42,032
Solve his problem, right?
1315
01:33:42,231 --> 01:33:46,818
Or would you say,
"2000 km. away I have another house.
1316
01:33:46,981 --> 01:33:50,121
"Visit me there and explain
your problem once again...
1317
01:33:50,300 --> 01:33:52,857
"Then I'll resolve it". How absurd!
1318
01:33:53,021 --> 01:33:55,594
If your call had reached
the right God,
1319
01:33:55,597 --> 01:33:58,491
He'd have said,
"Take care of you sick wife.
1320
01:33:58,666 --> 01:34:00,999
"Why leave her, and chase after Me?
1321
01:34:01,315 --> 01:34:04,324
"One day, you'll die.
You can meet Me, then.
1322
01:34:04,422 --> 01:34:06,581
For now, spend time with her."
1323
01:34:07,047 --> 01:34:08,409
Right?
1324
01:34:12,350 --> 01:34:15,286
I can prove
someone's pulling your leg.
1325
01:34:15,357 --> 01:34:17,177
Tapasvi ji, call God again.
1326
01:34:17,279 --> 01:34:19,560
Ask if He'll guarantee
1327
01:34:19,622 --> 01:34:21,339
that aunty will be cured?
1328
01:34:21,410 --> 01:34:23,621
Uncle, get written confirmation first.
1329
01:34:23,695 --> 01:34:25,449
Don't leave aunty without it.
1330
01:34:25,524 --> 01:34:28,286
Call now, everything will be clarified.
1331
01:34:29,360 --> 01:34:32,729
It's time for Tapasvi ji's
meditation.
1332
01:34:34,271 --> 01:34:37,261
♪ Oh God, destroyer of all evils
1333
01:34:37,310 --> 01:34:41,729
♪ Remover of all suffering
Hail the Lord !
1334
01:34:46,288 --> 01:34:47,341
Hey Tapasviji
1335
01:34:47,751 --> 01:34:49,856
That false God who misled you
1336
01:34:49,950 --> 01:34:51,771
has also stolen my remote.
1337
01:34:56,030 --> 01:34:58,093
It's not God, but a fraud.
1338
01:34:59,615 --> 01:35:01,670
Fraud!...Fraud!...Fraud!
1339
01:35:01,759 --> 01:35:05,367
So far nobody has ever seen
or heard God.
1340
01:35:05,516 --> 01:35:07,427
What God expects of us
1341
01:35:07,503 --> 01:35:09,849
we hear through
His so-called managers.
1342
01:35:09,938 --> 01:35:11,793
PK raised an important question.
1343
01:35:11,885 --> 01:35:13,185
What?
1344
01:35:14,449 --> 01:35:16,458
Do these God's Managers
1345
01:35:16,462 --> 01:35:18,133
ever reach the true God?
1346
01:35:18,144 --> 01:35:19,144
No!
1347
01:35:19,150 --> 01:35:23,398
Do the answers come from God,
or is it fraud?
1348
01:35:23,747 --> 01:35:27,232
- All wrong numbers.
- PK, what can people do?
1349
01:35:27,310 --> 01:35:29,646
Until the network lines are fixed,
1350
01:35:29,716 --> 01:35:32,630
we should resolve our problems,
1351
01:35:32,732 --> 01:35:34,208
by helping each other.
1352
01:35:34,482 --> 01:35:36,107
PK makes an important point.
1353
01:35:36,221 --> 01:35:37,809
As long as the managers
1354
01:35:37,812 --> 01:35:39,882
cannot contact the true God,
1355
01:35:40,005 --> 01:35:41,841
we should not seek their aid,
1356
01:35:41,913 --> 01:35:44,106
but simply help each other.
1357
01:35:47,440 --> 01:35:49,776
Bole-bole bole bumm-bumm bole!
1358
01:35:49,840 --> 01:35:51,776
Bumm-bumm bole! Bumm-bumm bole!
1359
01:35:51,982 --> 01:35:54,341
PK says this temple shouldn't be built,
1360
01:35:54,427 --> 01:35:56,377
because that jewel is his property.
1361
01:35:56,525 --> 01:35:58,177
What's in your pocket?
1362
01:36:01,158 --> 01:36:03,008
You smoke cigarettes, huh?
1363
01:36:03,216 --> 01:36:04,231
Yes.
1364
01:36:04,234 --> 01:36:05,888
Drink alcohol too, right?
1365
01:36:07,430 --> 01:36:08,430
Occasionally.
1366
01:36:08,529 --> 01:36:11,605
You smoke and drink
1367
01:36:11,746 --> 01:36:15,118
after knowing that it kills.
1368
01:36:16,202 --> 01:36:18,308
The government issues permits,
1369
01:36:18,824 --> 01:36:21,220
factories produce this poison
1370
01:36:21,298 --> 01:36:24,058
and it's sold openly in shops.
1371
01:36:24,174 --> 01:36:26,681
Yet nobody questions that.
1372
01:36:26,776 --> 01:36:29,579
But when I choose this holy site,...
1373
01:36:29,657 --> 01:36:31,930
the birthplace of Rama,...
1374
01:36:32,016 --> 01:36:34,510
sacred to Lord Krishna,...
1375
01:36:34,606 --> 01:36:36,758
and wish to build a temple,...
1376
01:36:37,721 --> 01:36:39,635
why all these questions?
1377
01:36:40,682 --> 01:36:43,200
If you want to ask questions,...
1378
01:36:43,278 --> 01:36:45,340
then question, the one...
1379
01:36:45,403 --> 01:36:48,060
who's trying to stop construction.
1380
01:36:48,239 --> 01:36:49,809
Who is this PK?
1381
01:36:50,323 --> 01:36:52,654
Is he Parwesh Khan? (Muslim)
1382
01:36:53,581 --> 01:36:56,000
or Pasha Khaman? (anti-Hindu)
1383
01:36:56,200 --> 01:36:58,010
Please do me a favour.
1384
01:36:58,509 --> 01:37:02,857
If you want to ask questions, ask PK...
1385
01:37:02,931 --> 01:37:04,904
What's his religion?
1386
01:37:05,010 --> 01:37:07,637
His beliefs, his customs,...
1387
01:37:07,708 --> 01:37:09,521
what are they?
1388
01:37:12,022 --> 01:37:15,075
Long ago, a man named Mahmood Ghazni
(971–1030 ad)
1389
01:37:15,794 --> 01:37:17,716
came to to destroy our temples.
1390
01:37:18,467 --> 01:37:23,053
Today, another man intends
to repeat history.
1391
01:37:23,190 --> 01:37:24,866
A man, who...
1392
01:37:51,134 --> 01:37:53,832
Tapasvi ji, can you phone your God?
1393
01:37:53,973 --> 01:37:55,849
He wants to know my religion, right?
1394
01:37:55,896 --> 01:37:58,787
Ask Him what is the religion
of these children of His
1395
01:37:58,854 --> 01:38:01,005
What kind of joke is this?
1396
01:38:01,060 --> 01:38:02,786
Call Him up and ask.
1397
01:38:02,872 --> 01:38:05,586
I don't have to ask God their religion.
1398
01:38:05,672 --> 01:38:07,430
I can tell that myself.
1399
01:38:07,638 --> 01:38:11,654
He's Hindu, he's Catholic,
he's Sikh, he's Jain...
1400
01:38:11,777 --> 01:38:13,137
and this one,...
1401
01:38:13,379 --> 01:38:15,068
must be of your sect, a Muslim
1402
01:38:16,206 --> 01:38:19,252
Could you tell Tapasvi ji
your names, now?
1403
01:38:19,358 --> 01:38:23,564
Hello ji, my name is
Sukhwinder Singh, Bedi.(Sikh)
1404
01:38:23,691 --> 01:38:26,706
Assalamu alaikum. My name is
Abbas Ali Yaakob.(Muslim)
1405
01:38:26,814 --> 01:38:28,801
Jai Hind (Hail India),
My name is Mahaveer, Jain.
1406
01:38:28,904 --> 01:38:31,227
Hi, I'm Christopher D'Souza.
(Catholic)
1407
01:38:31,808 --> 01:38:34,762
Namaskar. My name is Jagat Janini Sahni. (Hindu)
1408
01:38:35,105 --> 01:38:36,948
Hm! Confused?
1409
01:38:37,316 --> 01:38:39,823
I switched their clothes randomly.
1410
01:38:39,972 --> 01:38:41,081
Get it?
1411
01:38:41,416 --> 01:38:43,300
Religion is connected to fashion.
1412
01:38:43,362 --> 01:38:46,701
Let me explain. Come here.
1413
01:38:46,886 --> 01:38:49,966
Beard and turban means Sikh.
1414
01:38:50,320 --> 01:38:53,034
Remove the turban -- Hindu.
1415
01:38:53,146 --> 01:38:56,845
Remove the moustache -- Muslim.
1416
01:38:57,019 --> 01:38:58,947
These differences were made up
1417
01:38:58,950 --> 01:39:00,234
by a duplicate God.
1418
01:39:00,249 --> 01:39:02,177
If the real God wanted differences
1419
01:39:02,184 --> 01:39:05,258
He'd stamp the body permanently.
Check your own body.
1420
01:39:05,274 --> 01:39:06,257
Mine?
1421
01:39:06,261 --> 01:39:07,386
What are you looking at?
1422
01:39:07,464 --> 01:39:09,316
Remove your clothes and check.
1423
01:39:09,859 --> 01:39:11,435
Don't be shy!
1424
01:39:11,724 --> 01:39:13,554
Let's all take off our clothes
1425
01:39:13,640 --> 01:39:16,967
and show Tapasvi ji
if there's a stamp on our bodies.
1426
01:39:17,351 --> 01:39:19,890
Why so shy? OK, I'll go first.
1427
01:39:23,420 --> 01:39:24,820
Look.
1428
01:39:27,164 --> 01:39:29,359
Is there a stamp, huh?
1429
01:39:29,409 --> 01:39:31,005
See? Any marks at all?
1430
01:39:31,092 --> 01:39:32,342
Anything, at all?
1431
01:39:32,745 --> 01:39:35,132
Any marks? OK!
1432
01:39:35,429 --> 01:39:36,483
- HEY !
1433
01:39:36,785 --> 01:39:38,929
Get him out of here!
1434
01:39:39,674 --> 01:39:42,700
What are you doing?
Let me show my proof.
1435
01:39:42,794 --> 01:39:44,825
Start the chanting!
1436
01:39:48,830 --> 01:39:51,130
It's my property, not God's.
1437
01:39:59,284 --> 01:40:00,581
Jaggu!
1438
01:40:01,449 --> 01:40:03,174
Stop all this nonsense!
1439
01:40:03,310 --> 01:40:04,569
Papa?
1440
01:40:06,548 --> 01:40:08,622
You were just 40 days old
1441
01:40:08,648 --> 01:40:10,752
when Tapasvi ji named you.
1442
01:40:10,896 --> 01:40:13,634
Remember, the one who gave you
your name,
1443
01:40:13,713 --> 01:40:15,143
can also ruin it.
1444
01:40:15,318 --> 01:40:17,747
Papa, he named me Jagat Janani.
1445
01:40:17,841 --> 01:40:19,713
How much more can he ruin me?
1446
01:40:19,789 --> 01:40:20,908
You!
1447
01:40:21,371 --> 01:40:23,716
How much money do you want?
- Papa!
1448
01:40:23,793 --> 01:40:26,607
You're trying to extort money
from Tapasvi ji!
1449
01:40:26,726 --> 01:40:27,699
No.
1450
01:40:27,740 --> 01:40:29,646
You'll burn in hell !
1451
01:40:29,754 --> 01:40:31,857
Beware wrath of God !
1452
01:40:37,471 --> 01:40:40,419
Thank you..papa. thank you.
1453
01:40:40,970 --> 01:40:44,511
I barely understood half of it.
Now I understand it all!
1454
01:40:44,929 --> 01:40:46,693
This game's all about fear.
1455
01:40:46,755 --> 01:40:49,575
The wrong number fellow isn't just
pulling pranks
1456
01:40:49,629 --> 01:40:52,067
He's exploiting our fear. Get it?
1457
01:40:53,017 --> 01:40:55,074
PK, can you explain it to papa?
1458
01:40:55,320 --> 01:40:57,788
U-huh! I can explain and prove it.
1459
01:40:57,867 --> 01:40:59,628
Come, come.
1460
01:41:00,412 --> 01:41:02,880
I don't have time for this nonsense.
1461
01:41:02,965 --> 01:41:06,724
Papa, if this is nonsense,
I'll stop my TV show.
1462
01:41:19,280 --> 01:41:21,950
Papa, this college is having exams.
1463
01:41:22,036 --> 01:41:24,230
Students are all in a panic.
1464
01:41:24,346 --> 01:41:26,857
Now we'll start our fear business.
1465
01:41:26,983 --> 01:41:28,308
I'll show you.
1466
01:41:31,263 --> 01:41:32,363
Come.
1467
01:41:40,496 --> 01:41:42,846
Here's the plant machinery.
1468
01:41:47,910 --> 01:41:50,317
Initial investment.
1469
01:41:54,614 --> 01:41:58,245
And now, the inauguration.
1470
01:42:07,325 --> 01:42:08,646
Now, you'll see...
1471
01:42:08,797 --> 01:42:11,801
in 15 minutes investment will double.
1472
01:42:18,127 --> 01:42:19,988
There's one.
1473
01:42:21,122 --> 01:42:22,789
We're in business.
1474
01:42:23,796 --> 01:42:26,129
Chai! Hot tea!
1475
01:42:26,392 --> 01:42:30,304
See, to sell tea, you need
a much greater investment:
1476
01:42:30,379 --> 01:42:33,822
Bicycle, tea leaves, sugar,
water, glasses, thermos, gas etc...
1477
01:42:33,894 --> 01:42:37,588
But here... a stone and a red mark.
1478
01:42:37,831 --> 01:42:39,260
Chai! Hot tea chai!
1479
01:42:39,713 --> 01:42:42,083
He must call his customers.
1480
01:42:42,250 --> 01:42:45,281
We have so many, that we must
tell them to go.
1481
01:42:45,344 --> 01:42:46,914
Come on, be quick !
1482
01:42:47,006 --> 01:42:49,227
Give others a chance. Move on!
1483
01:42:52,055 --> 01:42:54,706
There, you bow to the customers.
1484
01:42:54,774 --> 01:42:57,635
Here, customers bow to you.
1485
01:42:59,183 --> 01:43:00,308
See?
1486
01:43:00,378 --> 01:43:01,995
If a guy is really scared
1487
01:43:02,066 --> 01:43:04,303
he'll prostrate himself, outright.
1488
01:43:04,607 --> 01:43:07,536
The wrong number fellow
is in business.
1489
01:43:07,811 --> 01:43:09,091
The fear business.
1490
01:43:09,161 --> 01:43:11,279
He figured out that scared people
1491
01:43:11,357 --> 01:43:12,927
go to the temple.
1492
01:43:13,160 --> 01:43:16,220
You're pretty scared, too.
Take this off.
1493
01:43:17,422 --> 01:43:19,817
Never question religion!
1494
01:43:20,530 --> 01:43:21,876
It's about faith!
1495
01:43:22,823 --> 01:43:25,227
If God didn't want us to question,
1496
01:43:25,622 --> 01:43:27,490
He wouldn't have given us
1497
01:43:27,621 --> 01:43:29,695
the faculty of reason.
1498
01:43:29,986 --> 01:43:31,871
Faced with questions they can't answer,
1499
01:43:31,926 --> 01:43:33,504
zealots get violent.
1500
01:43:34,068 --> 01:43:35,888
They stifle us by intimidation.
1501
01:43:35,966 --> 01:43:38,021
But now, we won't shut up.
1502
01:43:38,393 --> 01:43:40,563
So far, one PK is questioning,
1503
01:43:40,758 --> 01:43:43,258
now, thousands of PKs
will raise questions
1504
01:43:43,462 --> 01:43:46,215
So, friends keep your
cell phones handy.
1505
01:43:46,379 --> 01:43:49,456
If you see any "wrong numbers"
in religion
1506
01:43:49,574 --> 01:43:51,538
record it and send it to us.
1507
01:43:51,763 --> 01:43:53,824
We'll broadcast it on our channel.
1508
01:43:54,255 --> 01:43:56,998
Raise your phones,
raise your questions!
1509
01:44:06,133 --> 01:44:08,099
Baba ji. Baba ji!
(Holy man)
1510
01:44:08,395 --> 01:44:09,554
One question.
1511
01:44:09,742 --> 01:44:12,224
If you can produce gold out of thin air
1512
01:44:12,318 --> 01:44:15,305
why don't you
cure the nation's poverty, Baba?
1513
01:44:15,369 --> 01:44:16,302
Please answer.
1514
01:44:17,866 --> 01:44:18,952
Baba ji,
1515
01:44:19,155 --> 01:44:21,545
if you can make your own gold,
1516
01:44:21,701 --> 01:44:24,015
why ask us for donations?
1517
01:44:24,112 --> 01:44:25,407
Please reply.
1518
01:44:26,328 --> 01:44:28,732
Hario, hario! (Hail the Lord)
1519
01:44:28,911 --> 01:44:31,271
It's a wrong number.
Wrong number.
1520
01:44:31,406 --> 01:44:33,232
Jaggu! Come with me.
1521
01:44:34,137 --> 01:44:35,177
come with me.
1522
01:44:35,267 --> 01:44:37,123
just... come with me!
1523
01:44:37,661 --> 01:44:38,923
What are you doing?
1524
01:44:38,993 --> 01:44:41,790
The wole nation's calling
with wrong numbers.
1525
01:44:41,813 --> 01:44:42,813
What?
1526
01:44:42,907 --> 01:44:44,282
Terrific job !
1527
01:44:44,453 --> 01:44:45,754
Look at this.
1528
01:44:50,805 --> 01:44:53,937
He says, feed the cow, you'll find a job.
1529
01:44:53,947 --> 01:44:57,075
Will this cow pass on my C. V.
from company to company?
1530
01:44:57,216 --> 01:44:59,521
or post it on monster.com?
1531
01:44:59,692 --> 01:45:01,067
It's a wrong number.
1532
01:45:01,183 --> 01:45:02,310
There's more.
1533
01:45:02,950 --> 01:45:05,615
He said become Christan
or God will send you to hell.
1534
01:45:05,763 --> 01:45:09,552
If God wanted He'd have had me
be born in Christain family.
1535
01:45:09,646 --> 01:45:12,974
Why make me convert, now?
Wrong number.
1536
01:45:13,556 --> 01:45:15,429
We all want to go to school.
1537
01:45:15,532 --> 01:45:19,013
Now there's a fatwa to shoot
girls who go to school.
1538
01:45:19,089 --> 01:45:23,775
Is God so narrow-minded
as to be against education !
1539
01:45:24,175 --> 01:45:25,638
Wrong number.
1540
01:45:26,572 --> 01:45:29,540
Only what is written
in our destiny, will happen.
1541
01:45:30,263 --> 01:45:34,735
God has made a single masterplan
for the entire universe.
1542
01:45:34,844 --> 01:45:36,610
You must accept that.
1543
01:45:36,694 --> 01:45:41,122
Outside your followers are selling
your holy books for 10 rupees.
1544
01:45:41,209 --> 01:45:45,900
They say, if you read Page 4,
you will have a son.
1545
01:45:46,049 --> 01:45:49,660
That means by reading
a 10 rupee book,
1546
01:45:49,787 --> 01:45:53,384
you can screw up God's masterplan.
1547
01:46:01,912 --> 01:46:06,388
PK, your show is a hit.
The whole world is texting.
1548
01:46:06,717 --> 01:46:08,155
Here's another.
1549
01:46:13,034 --> 01:46:14,317
What is it?
1550
01:46:15,211 --> 01:46:19,304
Papa sent a message,
he's ashamed of me.
1551
01:46:22,971 --> 01:46:24,301
You know,...
1552
01:46:24,568 --> 01:46:25,935
I was 10...
1553
01:46:26,396 --> 01:46:28,825
when I wrote my first poem.
1554
01:46:29,980 --> 01:46:31,216
To papa.
1555
01:46:32,980 --> 01:46:35,689
Everyone says I look like mother
1556
01:46:36,127 --> 01:46:38,470
Everyone says so, its true
1557
01:46:39,382 --> 01:46:42,281
But I'm, my daddy's girl.
1558
01:46:42,633 --> 01:46:44,763
I recited this poem on Annual Day.
1559
01:46:45,669 --> 01:46:47,590
Everyone was clapping.
1560
01:46:48,052 --> 01:46:49,754
Above the clapping,
1561
01:46:49,872 --> 01:46:52,279
someone was whistling very loudly
1562
01:46:53,295 --> 01:46:54,996
The applause faded,
1563
01:46:55,110 --> 01:46:57,161
but the whistling didn't.
1564
01:46:58,433 --> 01:46:59,859
That was my papa.
1565
01:47:00,325 --> 01:47:02,235
He was so proud of me.
1566
01:47:03,949 --> 01:47:06,479
And today he texted...
1567
01:47:07,348 --> 01:47:08,943
"Ashamed of you"
1568
01:47:09,018 --> 01:47:11,458
In your father's mind,
1569
01:47:11,880 --> 01:47:14,669
this wrong number has taken over
1570
01:47:14,812 --> 01:47:16,865
The day he clears his mind
1571
01:47:16,950 --> 01:47:19,038
of the wrong number,
1572
01:47:19,243 --> 01:47:21,486
he'll whistle non-stop.
1573
01:47:21,495 --> 01:47:23,141
That day'll never come, PK.
1574
01:47:23,204 --> 01:47:25,985
Don't be sad. Come, get up.
1575
01:47:26,141 --> 01:47:28,577
On our planet, when someone's sad,
1576
01:47:28,580 --> 01:47:30,214
you know what we do ?
1577
01:47:30,839 --> 01:47:32,552
- What, PK?
- Come.
1578
01:47:32,629 --> 01:47:35,482
Follow me, your battery
will recharge automatically.
1579
01:47:35,592 --> 01:47:38,162
-What?
-Just copy me.
1580
01:47:43,384 --> 01:47:46,041
PK, what we are doing?
1581
01:47:51,404 --> 01:47:52,825
Close your eyes.
1582
01:47:52,888 --> 01:47:54,515
How can I copy you, then?
1583
01:47:54,555 --> 01:47:55,583
Good point.
1584
01:47:55,646 --> 01:47:56,842
Keep them open.
1585
01:49:30,731 --> 01:49:33,810
♪ Just keep staring at you
1586
01:49:33,964 --> 01:49:37,073
♪ Just keep listening to whatever you say
1587
01:49:37,178 --> 01:49:40,246
♪ Forgetting all my work
1588
01:49:40,403 --> 01:49:43,520
♪ Just following you, wherever you go
1589
01:49:43,630 --> 01:49:46,533
♪ It's such a waste of time,
1590
01:49:46,646 --> 01:49:49,596
♪ Love is a waste of time.
1591
01:49:49,888 --> 01:49:52,802
♪ Love is a waste of time.
1592
01:49:53,037 --> 01:49:55,887
♪ This love is a waste of time.
1593
01:49:56,246 --> 01:49:59,433
♪ Yet, I've decided in my mind,
1594
01:49:59,558 --> 01:50:02,660
♪ at least once in this life
1595
01:50:02,793 --> 01:50:05,308
♪ I should do this waste-of-time
1596
01:50:05,641 --> 01:50:08,205
♪ I want to do this waste-of-time
1597
01:50:08,654 --> 01:50:11,725
♪ I want to waste my time
1598
01:50:11,963 --> 01:50:14,954
♪ I love this waste-of-time
1599
01:50:31,575 --> 01:50:36,807
♪ Many many times, I look
at my face in the mirror
1600
01:50:37,941 --> 01:50:42,441
♪ Many many times, I fix my hair
1601
01:50:44,346 --> 01:50:49,012
♪ I change my clothes, many times
1602
01:50:50,701 --> 01:50:55,542
♪ I spray full bottles of
perfumed scent, all over
1603
01:50:57,058 --> 01:51:03,185
♪ I keep dressing, I keep combing
I don't do anything else
1604
01:51:03,403 --> 01:51:09,224
♪ Today, I understood brother,
love is a waste-of-time
1605
01:51:09,793 --> 01:51:13,121
♪ Yet, I've decided in my mind,
1606
01:51:13,215 --> 01:51:16,325
♪ at least once in this life
1607
01:51:16,411 --> 01:51:19,075
♪ to do this waste-of-time
1608
01:51:19,177 --> 01:51:22,239
♪ should do this waste-of-time
1609
01:51:22,383 --> 01:51:25,427
♪ - I want to waste my time
- I want to waste my time
1610
01:51:25,551 --> 01:51:29,329
♪ - I love this waste-of-time
- I love this waste-of-time
1611
01:52:04,394 --> 01:52:09,347
♪ Strange, weird things are
happening in my heart
1612
01:52:10,781 --> 01:52:15,701
♪ How can I explain, what
kind of feeling this is.
1613
01:52:17,175 --> 01:52:21,690
♪ I just sit and smile, for no reason
1614
01:52:23,620 --> 01:52:28,771
♪ Whatever's happening,
I can't understand any of it
1615
01:52:29,936 --> 01:52:32,995
♪ I feel like flying in the sky
1616
01:52:33,162 --> 01:52:35,983
♪ I feel like shouting loudly
1617
01:52:36,340 --> 01:52:42,200
♪ Today, I understood brother,
love is a waste-of-time
1618
01:52:42,720 --> 01:52:45,870
♪ Yet, I've decided in my mind,
1619
01:52:45,965 --> 01:52:49,115
♪ at least once in this life
1620
01:52:49,220 --> 01:52:52,080
♪ - I should do this waste-of-time
- (I should do this waste-of-time)
1621
01:52:52,236 --> 01:52:55,158
♪ - should do this waste-of-time
- (should do this waste-of-time)
1622
01:52:55,268 --> 01:52:58,200
♪ - I want to waste my time
- (I want to waste my time)
1623
01:52:58,333 --> 01:53:02,235
♪ I love this waste-of-time
1624
01:53:41,323 --> 01:53:44,646
More questions than money,
in the donation box, guru.
1625
01:53:44,769 --> 01:53:47,322
Sir, all your products
stopped selling:
1626
01:53:47,400 --> 01:53:49,839
pictures, books,
medicine, oil, incense...
1627
01:53:50,253 --> 01:53:53,808
Facebook and twitter are
full of negative comments.
1628
01:53:55,943 --> 01:53:57,091
Only five?
1629
01:53:57,185 --> 01:53:59,268
These are the positive ones.
1630
01:53:59,640 --> 01:54:02,124
The negative are here
1631
01:54:02,201 --> 01:54:03,632
Do something, sir
1632
01:54:03,710 --> 01:54:06,985
we can't lay low for long.
1633
01:54:15,004 --> 01:54:16,271
Call the media.
1634
01:54:16,938 --> 01:54:18,779
Likes to ask questions, does he?
1635
01:54:19,083 --> 01:54:21,091
Now it's our turn to ask questions.
1636
01:54:21,162 --> 01:54:22,482
- Hey Jaggu?
- Yeah.
1637
01:54:23,341 --> 01:54:24,466
What happened?
1638
01:54:24,813 --> 01:54:28,535
Tapasvi wants to be on the show.
What? - He wants to debate PK.
1639
01:54:28,555 --> 01:54:29,983
That's awesome! PK will shine.
1640
01:54:29,990 --> 01:54:32,643
Exactly, it's gonna be one
mother of a show! Prepare PK.
1641
01:54:32,746 --> 01:54:34,222
Mittu, put the promos on.
1642
01:54:40,627 --> 01:54:43,867
Don't forget to watch,
"One More Question"
1643
01:54:43,937 --> 01:54:45,781
Sunday evening at 6.
1644
01:54:45,911 --> 01:54:47,707
My friend has become star.
1645
01:54:47,903 --> 01:54:50,426
Look man, my friend's a star.
1646
01:54:50,520 --> 01:54:54,045
No. He was running around naked!
1647
01:54:54,480 --> 01:54:56,677
I made him a star.
1648
01:54:57,307 --> 01:54:59,947
That jackass is on TV.
1649
01:55:00,018 --> 01:55:01,322
And me?
1650
01:55:01,478 --> 01:55:03,607
Here in this shitty little village,
1651
01:55:03,779 --> 01:55:06,333
unknown, in a filthy bar,
1652
01:55:06,669 --> 01:55:09,497
drinking booze with an idiot like you.
1653
01:55:09,700 --> 01:55:12,200
Star? I made him a star!
1654
01:55:12,685 --> 01:55:13,732
Hmph!
1655
01:55:29,100 --> 01:55:30,100
PK!
1656
01:55:30,139 --> 01:55:32,356
Bhairon Singh calling for you.
1657
01:55:32,404 --> 01:55:33,451
Bhairon?
1658
01:55:33,461 --> 01:55:34,835
Take that line.
1659
01:55:36,613 --> 01:55:39,107
- Brother?
- Hey, lewd boy.
1660
01:55:39,294 --> 01:55:41,447
So, you're a star, now!
1661
01:55:42,052 --> 01:55:43,691
Brother, where are you?
1662
01:55:43,754 --> 01:55:45,258
Now, in Mandawa,
1663
01:55:45,466 --> 01:55:48,247
but I'll join you in the city
tomorrow.
1664
01:55:48,341 --> 01:55:50,150
I have a gift for you.
1665
01:55:50,200 --> 01:55:52,813
I caught the thief who stole
your thing.
1666
01:55:52,842 --> 01:55:54,531
He's right here.
1667
01:55:54,576 --> 01:55:56,766
Says he sold it for 40,000 rupees
1668
01:55:56,776 --> 01:55:58,466
to some guy.
1669
01:55:58,591 --> 01:56:01,124
Ask me who.
- Who?
1670
01:56:01,210 --> 01:56:03,764
To Tapasvi ji.
1671
01:56:06,903 --> 01:56:08,528
And God said... my son,
1672
01:56:08,669 --> 01:56:11,896
it's a jewel from Lord Shiva's
broken pellet drum.
1673
01:56:11,927 --> 01:56:13,216
Take it.
1674
01:56:14,365 --> 01:56:17,450
Take it and build a
shrine to venerate it.
1675
01:56:17,552 --> 01:56:20,427
for, the mere sight of it
will dispel the suffering
1676
01:56:20,568 --> 01:56:21,834
Hey!
1677
01:56:22,791 --> 01:56:24,437
Hello, what's up?
1678
01:56:25,492 --> 01:56:27,679
The thief who stole my remote...
1679
01:56:27,940 --> 01:56:29,325
has been caught.
1680
01:56:29,459 --> 01:56:30,998
What? Really?
1681
01:56:31,183 --> 01:56:32,723
Brother said...
1682
01:56:33,465 --> 01:56:34,646
the thief...
1683
01:56:34,732 --> 01:56:36,732
sold the remote to Tapasvi ji.
1684
01:56:36,801 --> 01:56:38,778
Then Tapasvi is in trouble.
1685
01:56:39,068 --> 01:56:41,505
We'll take the thief to Tapasvi ji
and tell him:
1686
01:56:41,599 --> 01:56:45,567
"You fat cheat, return the remote,
or we'll show it on TV"
1687
01:56:46,200 --> 01:56:49,119
Tapasvi didn't find my remote
in the Himalayas?
1688
01:56:49,388 --> 01:56:51,575
That means he is lying.
1689
01:56:52,701 --> 01:56:53,997
Which means...
1690
01:56:54,277 --> 01:56:57,119
no wrong number, no duplicate God.
1691
01:56:57,344 --> 01:56:59,724
Tapasvi ji is spreading the lie!
1692
01:57:01,879 --> 01:57:04,355
Did you know this already Jaggu?
1693
01:57:04,568 --> 01:57:07,349
PK, remember the first time
you mentined the wrong number?
1694
01:57:07,405 --> 01:57:09,646
When Tapasvi calls God,...
1695
01:57:09,732 --> 01:57:12,374
it gets directed to
the wrong number!
1696
01:57:12,460 --> 01:57:15,372
I knew, then, you were not doing it right.
1697
01:57:15,506 --> 01:57:17,341
But I didn't clear up your confusion,
1698
01:57:17,427 --> 01:57:19,556
because if you'd called Tapasvi ji
a fraud
1699
01:57:19,559 --> 01:57:21,241
his followers would've beaten you.
1700
01:57:21,381 --> 01:57:23,607
PK, people always want something new
1701
01:57:23,685 --> 01:57:25,490
Hold it. Wrong number!
1702
01:57:25,546 --> 01:57:28,387
And your 'wrong number' idea
really caught their attention.
1703
01:57:28,625 --> 01:57:31,231
Now, they're all behind you.
- It's a wrong number.
1704
01:57:31,275 --> 01:57:35,763
PK, my plan worked.
You'll get your remote, for sure.
1705
01:57:40,589 --> 01:57:41,619
But..
1706
01:57:42,269 --> 01:57:44,033
you're leaving tomorrow.
1707
01:57:46,080 --> 01:57:47,174
Gone.
1708
01:57:48,756 --> 01:57:50,835
I'll never see you again.
1709
01:57:53,154 --> 01:57:56,059
I'll really, really miss you.
1710
01:57:57,449 --> 01:57:59,801
I'll really, really miss you.
1711
01:58:02,077 --> 01:58:03,559
Shall I stay, then?
1712
01:58:06,870 --> 01:58:08,333
Don't joke.
1713
01:58:10,301 --> 01:58:11,583
I'm serious.
1714
01:58:12,383 --> 01:58:13,607
I have a job.
1715
01:58:14,122 --> 01:58:15,865
I could get a ration card
1716
01:58:15,978 --> 01:58:17,374
and settle here.
1717
01:58:17,662 --> 01:58:19,237
I could find someone
1718
01:58:19,323 --> 01:58:21,706
who'd waste her time with me.
1719
01:58:22,574 --> 01:58:24,558
We'd get married. Why not?
1720
01:58:25,167 --> 01:58:27,137
Who would marry you?
1721
01:58:27,531 --> 01:58:28,531
Why?
1722
01:58:29,455 --> 01:58:32,099
How would she introduce you?
1723
01:58:33,339 --> 01:58:36,685
Meet my husband, PK. (the drunk)
1724
01:58:38,244 --> 01:58:39,734
That's not my name.
1725
01:58:39,859 --> 01:58:42,625
Everyone's talking nonsense.
- PK haha
1726
01:58:42,718 --> 01:58:44,656
I'll change my name.
1727
01:58:45,474 --> 01:58:48,844
You suggest a name for me.
1728
01:58:48,917 --> 01:58:51,249
A name you like.
1729
01:58:51,958 --> 01:58:53,171
You see...
1730
01:58:53,261 --> 01:58:55,778
name and personality...
1731
01:58:56,261 --> 01:58:57,581
should match.
1732
01:58:58,434 --> 01:58:59,643
Absolutely.
1733
01:58:59,752 --> 01:59:02,472
So, how is my personality?
1734
01:59:02,550 --> 01:59:04,091
I'll give you a demo
1735
01:59:05,045 --> 01:59:07,388
A saint once said...
1736
01:59:09,587 --> 01:59:12,569
"The differences between
name and character"...
1737
01:59:12,718 --> 01:59:15,960
I'm in no mood for poetry.
I mean something else.
1738
01:59:16,569 --> 01:59:21,005
"The differences between name and
character. Have you ever noticed"
1739
01:59:21,068 --> 01:59:22,591
How can I explain to her.
1740
01:59:22,685 --> 01:59:26,552
"a person with a name so
different from his personality."
1741
01:59:27,326 --> 01:59:30,908
"A man called Fire who is always cold
1742
01:59:31,559 --> 01:59:34,989
"A man called Peace who causes wars.
1743
01:59:35,777 --> 01:59:41,816
A tailless man called Hanuman.
1744
01:59:42,441 --> 01:59:46,462
"Arjun, the archer, without a bow."
1745
01:59:47,011 --> 01:59:51,822
"But Phool Chand ji is so utterly fat,"
1746
01:59:51,962 --> 01:59:56,283
"he broke the chair wherever he sat."
1747
01:59:56,359 --> 01:59:57,802
Very good, very good.
1748
01:59:57,881 --> 02:00:01,288
I wrote a different name
on each of these cards
1749
02:00:01,772 --> 02:00:05,230
Choose one of them you think
suits me best. Have a look.
1750
02:00:05,419 --> 02:00:07,856
Tandlu Ram Chittey
1751
02:00:08,730 --> 02:00:10,263
Atrocious!
1752
02:00:11,692 --> 02:00:13,327
Tuktaari Singh.
1753
02:00:13,897 --> 02:00:15,270
Sshh... pfffff!
1754
02:00:16,675 --> 02:00:17,982
Sarfaraz...
1755
02:00:22,571 --> 02:00:23,622
Sarfaraz.
1756
02:00:24,382 --> 02:00:25,443
What's wrong?
1757
02:00:25,523 --> 02:00:27,950
Keep looking,
there are more good names
1758
02:00:31,784 --> 02:00:33,077
What's wrong, Jaggu?
1759
02:00:34,153 --> 02:00:35,240
Nothing.
1760
02:01:43,933 --> 02:01:45,226
Hey, brother!
1761
02:02:18,705 --> 02:02:20,270
[♪ radio]
1762
02:03:42,617 --> 02:03:45,927
A terrorist organization claimed
responsibility for this attack.
1763
02:03:46,122 --> 02:03:49,216
They said, "this was
just a small sample...
1764
02:03:49,309 --> 02:03:52,841
"of what happens to those
who attack our religion.
1765
02:03:52,959 --> 02:03:56,182
"We'll protect our religion
until our dying breath."
1766
02:04:17,215 --> 02:04:18,732
Where are you going, PK?
1767
02:04:20,181 --> 02:04:21,310
To the show.
1768
02:04:21,770 --> 02:04:23,794
No, it's not important. Leave it
1769
02:04:25,739 --> 02:04:27,932
It's very important, now.
1770
02:04:43,038 --> 02:04:44,834
"One More Question"
1771
02:04:45,108 --> 02:04:48,438
Welcome, everyone, to what
will be one "hot show"
1772
02:04:48,579 --> 02:04:51,042
Let's join PK and...
- One minute.
1773
02:04:51,255 --> 02:04:52,849
Just a minute.
1774
02:04:58,042 --> 02:04:59,552
Bring it.
1775
02:05:05,581 --> 02:05:06,841
What is this?
1776
02:05:07,643 --> 02:05:09,169
God says...
1777
02:05:09,513 --> 02:05:12,490
this is a broken piece of his drum
1778
02:05:12,615 --> 02:05:13,887
But, he says...
1779
02:05:14,333 --> 02:05:16,060
it's his property.
1780
02:05:17,040 --> 02:05:18,662
God says...
1781
02:05:19,127 --> 02:05:20,911
build temples.
1782
02:05:20,968 --> 02:05:22,397
He says...
1783
02:05:22,861 --> 02:05:24,635
forget the temples.
1784
02:05:24,644 --> 02:05:26,643
Now, who should we listen to?
1785
02:05:26,994 --> 02:05:28,290
God?
1786
02:05:28,847 --> 02:05:30,050
Or this guy?
1787
02:05:30,467 --> 02:05:33,815
who wears a yellow helmet
and distributes these pamphlets.
1788
02:05:33,898 --> 02:05:34,939
Look.
1789
02:05:35,203 --> 02:05:36,252
Look.
1790
02:05:37,684 --> 02:05:39,067
First he said...
1791
02:05:39,651 --> 02:05:41,231
God is missing.
1792
02:05:41,426 --> 02:05:43,496
Then he said God is a fraud.
1793
02:05:43,610 --> 02:05:45,504
Tomorrow he may even say...
1794
02:05:45,599 --> 02:05:46,848
God is dead.
1795
02:05:48,786 --> 02:05:50,875
Son, what do you want?
1796
02:05:51,204 --> 02:05:54,478
A world without God?
1797
02:05:56,505 --> 02:05:57,693
Do you have...
1798
02:05:57,943 --> 02:06:00,913
any idea about common
people's suffering?
1799
02:06:01,490 --> 02:06:03,255
Some have no food...
1800
02:06:04,373 --> 02:06:06,240
no roof for a shelter...
1801
02:06:07,245 --> 02:06:09,636
no friends to talk to.
1802
02:06:10,513 --> 02:06:14,280
Do you know how many
commit suicide every day?
1803
02:06:14,381 --> 02:06:17,442
They cut their veins,
hang from ceiling fans.
1804
02:06:17,678 --> 02:06:18,700
Why?
1805
02:06:19,029 --> 02:06:21,763
Because they have no hope.
1806
02:06:21,955 --> 02:06:23,966
If, bowing to God...
1807
02:06:24,825 --> 02:06:27,422
anointing their foreheads
with holy ash,...
1808
02:06:27,425 --> 02:06:29,825
tying a thread on their wrist,...
1809
02:06:29,896 --> 02:06:32,067
gives them hope to carry on,...
1810
02:06:32,219 --> 02:06:36,003
then who are you to take
their hope away?
1811
02:06:37,710 --> 02:06:38,800
And if..
1812
02:06:39,186 --> 02:06:42,568
you really want to take God away
from people,
1813
02:06:42,627 --> 02:06:46,150
then tell us what you'd give us
in return.
1814
02:06:46,587 --> 02:06:49,857
Enough of repeating
"wrong number, wrong number".
1815
02:06:51,003 --> 02:06:55,786
Tell us all today,
exactly what is the "right number".
1816
02:07:04,616 --> 02:07:07,234
What you say right, Tapasvi ji.
1817
02:07:08,528 --> 02:07:11,338
Once, I too...
1818
02:07:11,916 --> 02:07:13,599
had no food to eat.
1819
02:07:14,776 --> 02:07:16,384
No place to live.
1820
02:07:17,126 --> 02:07:18,786
I used to cry a lot...
1821
02:07:19,708 --> 02:07:22,200
because I had no friends, either.
1822
02:07:23,566 --> 02:07:26,497
At that time, I had only one support
1823
02:07:29,197 --> 02:07:30,586
God.
1824
02:07:31,913 --> 02:07:33,241
Every day I felt...
1825
02:07:33,413 --> 02:07:35,600
tomorrow won't be as bad as today.
1826
02:07:35,663 --> 02:07:37,601
God will do something.
1827
02:07:40,161 --> 02:07:41,241
I agree..
1828
02:07:42,427 --> 02:07:44,632
believing in God...
1829
02:07:45,369 --> 02:07:47,036
gives us hope.
1830
02:07:48,099 --> 02:07:49,654
and to deal with suffering
1831
02:07:49,748 --> 02:07:50,966
gives us courage
1832
02:07:51,029 --> 02:07:52,404
gives us strength.
1833
02:07:53,555 --> 02:07:56,060
But I have one question.
1834
02:07:58,978 --> 02:08:00,888
Which God to believe in?
1835
02:08:02,848 --> 02:08:05,368
You say, God is one.
1836
02:08:07,108 --> 02:08:08,393
I say, wrong.
1837
02:08:10,119 --> 02:08:11,510
There are two gods.
1838
02:08:13,157 --> 02:08:14,804
One, who created us...
1839
02:08:16,954 --> 02:08:17,982
and...
1840
02:08:18,435 --> 02:08:19,950
one, you created.
1841
02:08:21,967 --> 02:08:25,024
I don't know anything about
the one who created us.
1842
02:08:25,379 --> 02:08:27,085
But the one you created...
1843
02:08:27,404 --> 02:08:29,310
is just like you...
1844
02:08:30,470 --> 02:08:31,574
small...
1845
02:08:31,730 --> 02:08:32,847
corrupt...
1846
02:08:33,183 --> 02:08:34,769
makes false promises.
1847
02:08:35,189 --> 02:08:37,349
He greets the rich quickly,
1848
02:08:37,717 --> 02:08:39,404
and makes the poor wait in line.
1849
02:08:39,537 --> 02:08:41,396
is happy when praised.
1850
02:08:41,509 --> 02:08:43,693
frightens people for nothing.
1851
02:08:44,857 --> 02:08:46,857
The right number is quite simple.
1852
02:08:48,686 --> 02:08:49,771
The God...
1853
02:08:50,107 --> 02:08:51,814
who made us all...
1854
02:08:52,098 --> 02:08:53,449
can be trusted.
1855
02:08:54,907 --> 02:08:56,608
But the one you made...
1856
02:08:56,744 --> 02:08:58,542
the duplicate God...
1857
02:08:59,279 --> 02:09:00,741
stay away from him!
1858
02:09:03,319 --> 02:09:07,408
You think you can insult God
and I'll stay quiet?
1859
02:09:07,759 --> 02:09:11,548
Son, we know how to protect our God.
1860
02:09:12,081 --> 02:09:14,068
You will protect God?
1861
02:09:14,509 --> 02:09:15,747
You?
1862
02:09:16,916 --> 02:09:18,413
This is such a small planet.
1863
02:09:19,061 --> 02:09:22,258
There are millions of bigger
planets in the universe.
1864
02:09:22,333 --> 02:09:24,372
And you, sitting on a little planet...
1865
02:09:24,435 --> 02:09:26,755
in a little city,
in a little room,
1866
02:09:27,065 --> 02:09:28,972
you talk about protecting God?!
1867
02:09:28,996 --> 02:09:31,695
The one who created all this?
1868
02:09:31,988 --> 02:09:34,165
He doesn't need your protection.
1869
02:09:35,091 --> 02:09:37,396
He can protect himself, just fine.
1870
02:09:40,266 --> 02:09:43,466
Today somebody protected their god
1871
02:09:43,552 --> 02:09:45,754
and my friend died.
1872
02:09:46,572 --> 02:09:48,786
All I have left, is this shoe.
1873
02:09:50,646 --> 02:09:53,000
Stop protecting God,
1874
02:09:53,070 --> 02:09:56,559
or all that's left on this planet
will be shoes.
1875
02:09:56,832 --> 02:09:59,118
A Muslim sets off a bomb...
1876
02:09:59,750 --> 02:10:03,819
but a Hindu guru has to listen
to your lecture.
1877
02:10:03,829 --> 02:10:05,479
Hm?... Nice!
1878
02:10:05,690 --> 02:10:08,266
Who's Hindu, who's Muslim?
1879
02:10:08,471 --> 02:10:11,010
Where is the stamp? Show us.
1880
02:10:11,903 --> 02:10:14,476
Not God's, but mankind's
distinctions.
1881
02:10:15,333 --> 02:10:19,497
That's the most dangerous
wrong number on this planet.
1882
02:10:19,592 --> 02:10:21,221
The most deadly.
1883
02:10:21,242 --> 02:10:24,443
People die because of it,
become alien to each other.
1884
02:10:24,455 --> 02:10:25,910
The same wrong number
1885
02:10:26,028 --> 02:10:29,739
you planted in Jaggu's brain
to alienate her from Sarfaraz.
1886
02:10:29,817 --> 02:10:31,083
What wrong number?
1887
02:10:31,154 --> 02:10:32,991
Sarfaraz would deceive her.
1888
02:10:33,127 --> 02:10:35,052
Muslims are all hypocrites.
1889
02:10:35,082 --> 02:10:37,510
So? He did, deceive her!
1890
02:10:37,528 --> 02:10:38,793
Where's the lie?
1891
02:10:38,866 --> 02:10:41,855
One second.
- No, what's going on, here?
1892
02:10:41,890 --> 02:10:43,183
Just wait.
1893
02:10:44,841 --> 02:10:46,778
Are you telling me...
1894
02:10:47,372 --> 02:10:50,669
that my prediction regarding Sarfaraz...
1895
02:10:50,791 --> 02:10:52,385
was wrong?!
1896
02:10:52,536 --> 02:10:54,865
Yeah, of course.
- Prove it.
1897
02:10:55,223 --> 02:10:58,013
Prove that my prediction was wrong.
1898
02:10:58,119 --> 02:10:59,852
And if you can't..
1899
02:11:00,056 --> 02:11:02,057
prostrate yourself at my feet
1900
02:11:02,122 --> 02:11:05,075
and beg forgiveness,
for slandering me
1901
02:11:05,173 --> 02:11:06,891
in front of everyone.
1902
02:11:07,331 --> 02:11:09,317
And if I prove it?
1903
02:11:09,865 --> 02:11:11,357
PK, don't!
1904
02:11:17,212 --> 02:11:19,718
Then, it's yours, son.
1905
02:11:25,263 --> 02:11:26,864
It's a deal.
1906
02:11:27,185 --> 02:11:31,529
Could we have the camera
on Jagat Janani?
1907
02:11:38,136 --> 02:11:39,278
Jagat Janani,
1908
02:11:39,332 --> 02:11:42,981
I hope you will answer
all my questions...
1909
02:11:43,209 --> 02:11:45,234
truthfully.
1910
02:11:47,316 --> 02:11:48,529
In Belgium,
1911
02:11:48,654 --> 02:11:52,341
you fell in love with
a Pakistani boy.
1912
02:11:53,775 --> 02:11:55,302
Yes or no?
1913
02:11:55,412 --> 02:11:57,832
Why is my personal life
being discussed here?
1914
02:11:57,881 --> 02:11:59,496
On a Friday...
1915
02:12:00,223 --> 02:12:04,014
at 3:21 pm, I predicted that...
1916
02:12:04,675 --> 02:12:06,875
this boy will deceive you.
1917
02:12:06,896 --> 02:12:08,195
And the next day...
1918
02:12:08,700 --> 02:12:11,396
you went to the Marriage
Registrar's office...
1919
02:12:11,602 --> 02:12:13,608
but, this boy didn't come.
1920
02:12:14,016 --> 02:12:15,021
Yes...
1921
02:12:15,466 --> 02:12:16,509
or no?
1922
02:12:16,550 --> 02:12:19,823
Yes, he didn't come.
Can you please stop this?
1923
02:12:21,013 --> 02:12:22,449
Now...
1924
02:12:23,075 --> 02:12:25,185
shall you come to my feet,
1925
02:12:25,349 --> 02:12:27,521
or shall I bring my feet to you?
1926
02:12:27,600 --> 02:12:29,255
Sarfaraz did not deceive.
1927
02:12:29,339 --> 02:12:31,396
PK let it go, please
1928
02:12:31,646 --> 02:12:34,648
No, tell everyone exactly
what happened that day.
1929
02:12:34,810 --> 02:12:35,863
PK, please!
1930
02:12:35,966 --> 02:12:37,472
Just once...
1931
02:12:37,996 --> 02:12:39,839
for my sake.
1932
02:12:45,104 --> 02:12:49,806
I was in the Marriage Registrar's
office and a letter arrived.
1933
02:12:49,944 --> 02:12:52,053
Sarfaraz delivered it?
1934
02:12:54,171 --> 02:12:55,349
No.
1935
02:12:56,796 --> 02:12:58,341
A little boy did.
1936
02:12:58,440 --> 02:13:00,007
Was it signed?
1937
02:13:00,598 --> 02:13:01,708
Noooo!
1938
02:13:01,780 --> 02:13:05,042
How do you know it was
Sarfarz's letter?
1939
02:13:08,529 --> 02:13:11,607
It could have been
for another girl.
1940
02:13:15,341 --> 02:13:17,615
Wasn't there another
girl in the place?
1941
02:13:17,839 --> 02:13:20,075
a girl with a cat.
1942
02:13:22,054 --> 02:13:25,357
Didn't she ask you
to hold her cat?
1943
02:13:26,826 --> 02:13:30,502
The boy with letter,
did he know you?
1944
02:13:30,707 --> 02:13:31,540
No.
1945
02:13:31,601 --> 02:13:33,228
Did you know him?
1946
02:13:34,087 --> 02:13:34,978
No.
1947
02:13:35,072 --> 02:13:38,886
How would either of you know
the letter was meant for you.
1948
02:13:39,991 --> 02:13:41,856
Perhaps he was told...
1949
02:13:42,677 --> 02:13:44,337
to deliver the letter...
1950
02:13:44,719 --> 02:13:46,824
to a lady with a cat.
1951
02:13:48,680 --> 02:13:50,325
He gave you the letter...
1952
02:13:50,604 --> 02:13:52,041
you read it...
1953
02:13:52,333 --> 02:13:54,833
but you didn't even call Sarfaraz, after.
1954
02:13:55,960 --> 02:13:57,565
Did you call Sarfaraz?
1955
02:13:58,976 --> 02:14:00,443
Because Tapasvi ji...
1956
02:14:00,708 --> 02:14:03,224
planted a wrong number in your brain...
1957
02:14:03,467 --> 02:14:05,771
that Muslims are dishonest.
1958
02:14:06,263 --> 02:14:08,525
Sarfaraz didn't deceive you, Jaggu.
1959
02:14:08,761 --> 02:14:10,255
What's going on here?
1960
02:14:10,516 --> 02:14:13,763
A cat, dog, whatever...
you're making up stories
1961
02:14:13,868 --> 02:14:16,060
and expect us to swallow it, huh?
1962
02:14:16,116 --> 02:14:18,997
One moment.
We'll get the truth, right now.
1963
02:14:19,060 --> 02:14:21,226
Jaggu, get your phone.
Call Sarfaraz.
1964
02:14:21,498 --> 02:14:23,755
Come on, Jaggu, hurry!
1965
02:14:25,737 --> 02:14:27,872
Dit nummer is niet in gebruik
(not in use)
1966
02:14:27,958 --> 02:14:30,068
This number does not exist.
1967
02:14:30,161 --> 02:14:31,341
Another number...
1968
02:14:31,390 --> 02:14:33,552
friend, college, something?...
1969
02:14:33,760 --> 02:14:34,841
Come on Jaggu!
1970
02:14:35,025 --> 02:14:36,950
Belgium University.
- Dial.
1971
02:14:41,361 --> 02:14:42,862
- Hello.
- Hello.
1972
02:14:43,807 --> 02:14:47,448
I actually need to get in touch
with one of your grad students
1973
02:14:47,620 --> 02:14:49,075
Sarfarz, Yusuf?
1974
02:14:49,232 --> 02:14:51,756
Oh, yeah, he left for Pakistan
last year.
1975
02:14:51,841 --> 02:14:52,857
(Conact?)
1976
02:14:52,950 --> 02:14:54,668
Has he left a number?
- I'm sorry,
1977
02:14:54,671 --> 02:14:56,929
we're not authorized to
give out information.
1978
02:14:57,021 --> 02:14:58,762
Ma'am, this is really important
1979
02:14:58,831 --> 02:15:01,862
E-mail us your request. I can
forward it to student affairs.
1980
02:15:01,936 --> 02:15:03,209
Have a nice day, dear.
1981
02:15:03,487 --> 02:15:05,256
Pakistan home number.
1982
02:15:05,369 --> 02:15:07,750
- No.
- Think, Jaggu, think.
1983
02:15:09,263 --> 02:15:12,341
I have a part-time job at
the Pakistani Embassy.
1984
02:15:12,447 --> 02:15:15,630
He had a part-time at
the Pakistani Embassy.
1985
02:15:15,755 --> 02:15:18,849
- Mittu, call the Pakistan Embassy, Belgium.
- Copy, Sir.
1986
02:15:18,939 --> 02:15:20,927
And put it on speaker.
1987
02:15:23,776 --> 02:15:26,005
Assalamu alaikum.
Pakistan Embassy.
1988
02:15:26,381 --> 02:15:27,981
Hello..umm
1989
02:15:29,077 --> 02:15:32,500
did you have a student
from Lahore working there...
1990
02:15:32,585 --> 02:15:34,004
Sarfaraz Yusuf?
1991
02:15:34,042 --> 02:15:35,908
Is your name Jaggu?
1992
02:15:39,302 --> 02:15:41,302
Hello, is your name Jaggu?
1993
02:15:42,166 --> 02:15:43,943
Yes, how do you know?
1994
02:15:44,167 --> 02:15:45,948
The phone call finally came!.
1995
02:15:46,027 --> 02:15:47,863
The Delhi girl phoned
1996
02:15:47,956 --> 02:15:50,203
Farah, Jaggu phoned, come quick!
1997
02:15:50,206 --> 02:15:52,724
Mr Syed, come fast,
Jaggu's phone call came !
1998
02:15:52,794 --> 02:15:56,615
We got a call from India,
come, everyone.
1999
02:15:58,879 --> 02:16:00,138
Miss,...
2000
02:16:00,318 --> 02:16:04,929
Sarfaraz Yusuf phones every
morning at 9, from Lahore.
2001
02:16:05,612 --> 02:16:09,583
And politely asks,
always the same question.
2002
02:16:10,029 --> 02:16:13,638
Did someone named Jaggu,
call from India?
2003
02:16:15,099 --> 02:16:18,068
We say no, and he hangs up.
2004
02:16:18,481 --> 02:16:20,427
Drove us all mad.
2005
02:16:20,651 --> 02:16:23,151
Hold on, I'll connect you.
2006
02:16:28,272 --> 02:16:29,670
[ringing]
2007
02:16:38,557 --> 02:16:39,739
Hello.
2008
02:16:40,529 --> 02:16:43,985
- Mr Sarfaraz Yusuf?
- Yes, Assalamu alaikum.
2009
02:16:44,177 --> 02:16:45,935
Where are you speaking from?
2010
02:16:46,130 --> 02:16:47,928
Um, from Lahore, why?
2011
02:16:48,494 --> 02:16:50,263
Where are you right now?
2012
02:16:50,682 --> 02:16:53,281
I'm at my home, why?
2013
02:16:53,978 --> 02:16:57,331
Do you have a chair or a bench handy?
2014
02:16:58,070 --> 02:17:00,083
If you do, please sit down,
2015
02:17:00,174 --> 02:17:03,027
because you may fall from the shock.
2016
02:17:03,278 --> 02:17:06,115
Uh, sorry, I didn't get that.
2017
02:17:07,411 --> 02:17:09,849
You have a phone call from Delhi.
2018
02:17:15,750 --> 02:17:17,950
Go ahead, talk to her.
2019
02:17:20,333 --> 02:17:21,638
Hello.
2020
02:17:21,718 --> 02:17:23,107
Sarfaraz!
2021
02:17:27,780 --> 02:17:29,052
Jaggu
2022
02:17:31,361 --> 02:17:32,634
Hello?
2023
02:17:34,454 --> 02:17:36,782
Jaggu, are you ok? Hello?
2024
02:17:39,063 --> 02:17:41,700
Did you come to the Marriage
Registrar office?
2025
02:17:41,774 --> 02:17:42,797
Yes I did.
2026
02:17:43,458 --> 02:17:45,534
But you'd left.
2027
02:17:46,200 --> 02:17:48,232
Why didn't you ever call?
2028
02:17:48,333 --> 02:17:50,700
How could I? I read your letter.
2029
02:17:50,990 --> 02:17:53,966
It said,
"Don't try to contact me"
2030
02:17:54,365 --> 02:17:57,027
I knew you had a lot of family pressure.
2031
02:17:57,147 --> 02:17:58,574
I don't know why, but
2032
02:17:58,680 --> 02:18:00,230
I always felt
2033
02:18:00,386 --> 02:18:03,543
you'd try to contact me someday.
2034
02:18:05,956 --> 02:18:08,568
Took you a long enough, hey, Jaggu?
2035
02:18:10,193 --> 02:18:11,786
What could I do?
2036
02:18:12,610 --> 02:18:15,419
I had your number, all wrong.
2037
02:18:21,974 --> 02:18:25,443
A friend just gave me
your right number.
2038
02:18:51,967 --> 02:18:53,425
Thank you, son.
2039
02:19:28,286 --> 02:19:30,224
Hold this, a sec.
2040
02:19:54,427 --> 02:19:59,232
- PK, you're taking batteries?
- You can't get them, there.
2041
02:19:59,371 --> 02:20:02,735
What are you going to do
with so many?
2042
02:20:02,982 --> 02:20:07,009
I'll listen to these recordings I made.
2043
02:20:07,175 --> 02:20:08,536
What kind of recordings?
2044
02:20:08,755 --> 02:20:13,269
Sounds of this planet,
birds, crows, traffic.
2045
02:20:13,380 --> 02:20:15,620
You're gonna listen to traffic noise?
2046
02:20:16,733 --> 02:20:19,200
Whenever I start to miss this planet
2047
02:20:19,302 --> 02:20:21,464
I'll listen to these sounds.
2048
02:20:23,105 --> 02:20:24,294
Hey wait!
2049
02:20:24,724 --> 02:20:26,708
I have one more trunk.
2050
02:20:26,873 --> 02:20:28,185
PK, let it go.!
2051
02:20:28,446 --> 02:20:30,193
What do you mean, let it go?
2052
02:20:30,279 --> 02:20:32,437
I need those other batteries.
2053
02:20:32,789 --> 02:20:34,083
Do you hear me?
2054
02:20:37,833 --> 02:20:39,588
Driver, do you hear?
2055
02:20:54,852 --> 02:20:58,443
...does everyone on your planet
have big ears, like you?
2056
02:20:59,900 --> 02:21:02,876
And they all walk around naked?
2057
02:21:04,509 --> 02:21:08,161
What are you looking at?
Is there dirt on my face?
2058
02:21:11,643 --> 02:21:18,006
You know I was 10 when
I wrote my first poem...
2059
02:21:18,571 --> 02:21:19,571
To papa.
2060
02:21:21,617 --> 02:21:27,123
Everyone says I look like mother
Everyone says so, its true
2061
02:21:34,297 --> 02:21:36,075
Poetry means
2062
02:21:36,896 --> 02:21:39,433
saying something big,
with few words.
2063
02:21:40,702 --> 02:21:42,851
By the way you're really cute.
2064
02:21:44,411 --> 02:21:48,177
One more toast for a friend, who...
2065
02:21:48,818 --> 02:21:52,264
[Jaggu]
♪ I know, I'm poor in money...
2066
02:21:53,798 --> 02:21:57,797
There was no sound of
birds, crows or traffic..
2067
02:21:58,680 --> 02:22:01,469
Every tape had only my voice.
2068
02:22:16,001 --> 02:22:17,443
I got it.
2069
02:22:22,853 --> 02:22:25,095
He sure made me run a lot!
2070
02:22:28,647 --> 02:22:31,958
PK, what did you record in the tapes?
2071
02:22:33,110 --> 02:22:36,336
I told you, birds, crows, traffic.
2072
02:22:47,762 --> 02:22:52,635
Whenever I miss earth,
I'll play these tapes.
2073
02:22:53,644 --> 02:22:56,513
I'll wave to you, from there...
2074
02:22:56,686 --> 02:22:58,842
like this, fast.
2075
02:23:01,357 --> 02:23:03,654
Please wave back to me...
2076
02:23:04,444 --> 02:23:06,098
whenever you have time.
2077
02:23:07,248 --> 02:23:09,732
They're not tapes of my voice?
2078
02:23:10,529 --> 02:23:11,888
Your voice...
2079
02:23:13,530 --> 02:23:14,810
Yes, it's there.
2080
02:23:15,060 --> 02:23:18,140
That poem you recited.
2081
02:23:18,611 --> 02:23:21,294
Only poetry?
2082
02:23:24,608 --> 02:23:27,663
What? Am I in love with you,
2083
02:23:27,688 --> 02:23:30,932
that I'd waste all my tapes on you?
2084
02:23:49,799 --> 02:23:51,962
He didn't look back, once.
2085
02:23:52,994 --> 02:23:55,266
Perhaps he was hiding his tears.
2086
02:23:56,197 --> 02:24:00,146
He learned something
and taught something.
2087
02:24:01,453 --> 02:24:03,543
He learned to lie.
2088
02:24:04,530 --> 02:24:08,630
And taught us the
true meaning of love.
2089
02:24:09,486 --> 02:24:12,224
He loved me enough, to let me go.
2090
02:24:13,139 --> 02:24:15,341
He also arrived naked,
2091
02:24:15,435 --> 02:24:18,023
like a newborn child.
2092
02:24:19,712 --> 02:24:25,594
Also, like a child, he
asked a million questions.
2093
02:24:27,645 --> 02:24:29,067
Then, one day...
2094
02:24:32,113 --> 02:24:33,503
he went away.
2095
02:24:36,004 --> 02:24:39,398
About 4000 million
kilometers away.
2096
02:24:41,932 --> 02:24:45,025
But he left me two beautiful gifts.
2097
02:24:47,876 --> 02:24:49,244
Sarfaraz...
2098
02:24:51,002 --> 02:24:52,345
and papa.
2099
02:24:56,191 --> 02:25:00,499
I'll gaze at his star,
as long as I live...
2100
02:25:01,427 --> 02:25:02,991
and wave.
2101
02:25:05,334 --> 02:25:08,294
I'm sure he'll do the same.
2102
02:25:13,053 --> 02:25:14,411
I miss him.
2103
02:25:54,706 --> 02:25:58,728
Brothers, in an hour we'll
be landing on earth.
2104
02:25:59,002 --> 02:26:01,455
Don't forget what I taught you.
2105
02:26:01,720 --> 02:26:03,247
Four major points:
2106
02:26:03,403 --> 02:26:06,482
1... It's forbidden to
walk naked on Earth.
2107
02:26:06,621 --> 02:26:09,142
All kissing, smooching
and getting naked
2108
02:26:09,221 --> 02:26:12,041
are done behind closed doors
out of sight.
2109
02:26:12,166 --> 02:26:14,900
Thing like, fighting,
cursing, wars etc.,
2110
02:26:14,979 --> 02:26:16,363
are done in the open.
2111
02:26:16,417 --> 02:26:19,829
2... The most confusing
thing is language.
2112
02:26:20,290 --> 02:26:22,571
If you hear someone
at the market say,
2113
02:26:22,574 --> 02:26:24,269
"I love chicken, I love fish"
2114
02:26:24,328 --> 02:26:27,396
It doesn't mean
they're animal-lovers.
2115
02:26:27,654 --> 02:26:32,497
It means, today, for lunch
they'll eat chicken or fish
2116
02:26:32,693 --> 02:26:35,963
There is a huge difference in
what people think and say.
2117
02:26:35,966 --> 02:26:37,915
Our research will focus on this.
2118
02:26:38,052 --> 02:26:41,731
3... We'll steal clothes from a
dancing car as soon as we land.
2119
02:26:41,794 --> 02:26:44,889
Everyone, put your remote control
in your underwear.
2120
02:26:45,034 --> 02:26:49,120
Really, really deep, where
no one can steal it
2121
02:26:49,378 --> 02:26:52,431
And 4... the most important point!
2122
02:26:52,610 --> 02:26:56,286
If you meet someone who says
he can connect you to God.
2123
02:26:56,411 --> 02:26:58,771
Then, to hell with research!
2124
02:26:58,862 --> 02:27:01,942
Make a U-turn and hurry
at full speed, back home.
2125
02:27:13,991 --> 02:27:16,678
Come bro, don't be scared. come.
2126
02:27:22,145 --> 02:27:24,521
What are you staring at, eh?
2127
02:27:25,661 --> 02:27:27,255
I have a question.
2128
02:27:27,506 --> 02:27:28,630
What?
2129
02:27:29,224 --> 02:27:34,189
Last time how many times
were you slapped around?
2130
02:27:41,637 --> 02:27:42,999
What's that for?
2131
02:27:43,301 --> 02:27:44,608
Self defense.
2132
02:27:45,156 --> 02:27:46,644
Aha, safety?
2133
02:27:47,458 --> 02:27:48,687
- Let's go
- Let's go.
2134
02:27:48,724 --> 02:27:51,728
Hey, where you goin'?
This way.
2135
02:27:53,372 --> 02:27:58,958
♪Subtitles: Arpan Bhatia, MohdAsriDungun
Gunjan. Corrected, resynced by♪ AsifAkheir
141859
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